#idk im excited about it. i'm enjoying writing it

[whiskey-tango-matcha]

hi hello long time no talk, i am writing a fic! it'll be up this evening! i promise! (i'm posting this bc i'm holding myself accountable, it's gonna be up it's been MONTHS since i've written and i'm putting this fic out IF IT KILLS ME)

[n0vazsq]

Good looking boy | LL30 x Reader

pairing . . . liam lawson x tsunoda!reader

summary . . . Your first time visiting the paddock is definitely… interesting. What was meant to be a simple visit to see your brother turns into something else entirely when his former teammate (and your very obvious admirer) Liam Lawson can’t stop staring, gets distracted, and accidentally trips you. An awkward apology quickly turns into a dinner invitation, and suddenly visiting your brother isn't the only thing you look forward to

request . . . yes!! based on this request

word count . . . N/A

warnings . . . none!

faceclaim . . . deguchi natsuki and girls from pin!

alexavia yaps . . . title is random bc idk. also writing this at 3 am after not writing for a solid 3 months so i apologise if its pure shit <33 hope you enjoy and sorry if its short !! this is set after yuki went to redbull (japanese gp and onward) btw! i know the pacing is weird and really fast but i hope it made sense!!

yourusername

liked by yukitsunoda0511, visacashapprb, liamlawson30 and 844K others

yourusername race day in japan!! will finally see yuki live for the first time <3 so excited to watch the race and big thanks to vcarb for inviting me (even though my brother doesn't drive for you anymore) Tagged: yukitsunoda0511

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yukitsunoda0511 why'd you post that picture of me

yourusername it's perfectly fine

yukitsunoda0511 my eyes are closed

yukitsunoda0511 it's not fair if you have a good pic😔

yourusername literally not my fault i'm more photogenetic and better looking

liamlawson30 i think you both look good

yourusername thank you liam !!

yukitsunoda0511 get out of here liam you don't have a chance

username1 i live for the tsunoda siblings fighting

username2 both of them raw. next question

username3 woah

username4 praying for yuki's pr manager this weekend

username5 i just know they made everyone's life a living hell

username6 she;s so pretty how

username7 i mean she's a tsunoda everyone in that family is good looking

username8 WE NEED MORE YUKI CONTENT HES SO GOOD LOOKING WTF

username9 y/n please post more im begging

liamlawson30 i hope you're on my side of the garage

yourusername i think am idk

liamlawson30 im so glad you`re not in the redbull garage because having you in the vcarb garage will grant everyone a heavenly and angelic presence

yukitsunoda0511 i can read this.

liamlawson0511 YOU CAN READ?? NO WAY!!!

yourusername yuki has steam coming out of his ear rn

yukitsunoda0511 no i don't

liamlawson30 "no i don't" mate we can all see it😊

yukitsunoda0511 when i get my hands on you blondie

yourusername woah woah woah ladies one at a time

username10 HELP I LOVE Y/N

username11 "blondie" IM SOBBINGGGGGGGg

username12 man i love them

username13 tsunoda siblings are my goats no one can change my mind

username14 theyre so iconic sigh

username15 meow

username16 real

username17 im screaming crying throwing up that face card is so lethal

username18 manifesting yuki win and liam p2

username19 yuki would probably push liam off the podium stand

username18 bro is NOT letting him hit with y/n

username19 he cant fight ALL of us tho thats a fact

username20 MY HEART CANT TAKE THIS SHIT I NEED Y/N AND LIAM TOGETHER ASAP. like bro they've been on and off flirting with each other for like a year when will he ask her out </3

yukitsunoda0511

liked by yourusername, liamlawson30, maxverstappen1 and 3.1M others

yukitsunoda0511 whoever said family is the best company clearly hasn't met my sister

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username21 HELP????

username22 crying this is so random

username23 LMFAOOOOOO

username24 y/n vs corn dog who's winning

username25 corn dog 10000%

yourusername leave me alone bro i'm trying

username26 SOBBING

username27 i need to know what liam thinks about this

username28 is the picture of yuki edited?? im sobbing

liamlawson30 i can take her off your hands if you want 😊

yukitsunoda0511 fuck off

yourusername W rizz lowkey

yukitsunoda0511 he has no rizz all he does is stare at you like a creep

liamlawson30 😔

liamlawson30 sorry...?

yukitsunoda0511 you better be you only talked to her in real life for the first time yesterday and already stared at her for a total for 89 hours

yourusername i`m still here

yukitsunoda0511 f1 weekend didn't even start yet and he's already flirting

yourusername it's literally thursday it's basically the same as friday

yukitsunoda0511 it's not. they're two different days with two different meanings

liamlawson30 can i say that y/n looks very beautiful in that picture

yukitsunoda0511 blondie i swear

yourusername aww liam tysm <33 you looked very handsome in the paddock today too

yukitsunoda0511 ...

liawlawson30 your sister likes me

yukitsunoda0511 no

yourusername why are we arguing over my love life

yukitsunoda0511 because blondie thinks he's your soulmate or something

yourusername what if 'blondie' is my soulmate

yukitsunoda he isnt??

yourusername i said what IF

liamlawson30 omg there's a chance y/n in my soulmate

yukitsunoda0511 not for long

yourusername ??

yukitsunoda0511 you didn't see that

yourusername i'm not blind mate

yukitsunoda0511 you might as well be with that bat vision

liamlawson30 i think your vision is just fine y/n <3

yukitsunoda0511 no one cares and no one asked blondie

liamlawson30 being attacked for my kindness

yourusername it's okay liam just ignore him

yukitsunoda0511 don't ignore me liam.

username29 WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF MY HUSBAND

username30 oh to be as pretty as her

yourusername the hate on me was unnecessary

yukitsunoda0511 sigh

yukitsunoda0511 sorry i guess

yourusername you should be 😔

yukitsunoda0511 btw i'm only being nice to you because our mother threatened me

yourusername good

yourusername does that mean you'll leave blondie alone

yukitsunoda0511 no

yourusername sigh

liamlawson30 now you're both calling me blondie

liamlawson30 seems like i'm in for a long weekend

username31 THE NICKNAME HELP

username32 im crying about the y/n x liam ship and so is yuki

username33 okay so im not schizo and liam DID flirt with yuki's sister

username34 i wish i had yuki as my bf

username35 i wish i had Y/N as my gf

username36 i wish i was liam honestly

username37 smash (both of them)

username38 yuki's way calmer than i expected him to be about this

username39 honestly was fully expecting him to light up the vcarb garage on fire after seeing liam's comment

username40 if liam and y/n don't go out soon that means yuki murdered liam

liamlawson30

liked by yourusername, isackhadjar, visacashapprb and 1.1M others

liamlawson30 accidentaly made a pretty girl trip and then took her to dinner as an apology and i think she likes me? Tagged: yourusername

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username41 MOTHERRRRRRRRR

username42 HELLO??

username43 he ate. licked the plate clean. swallowed the table even. yuki's crash out will be valid

username44 this is all happening on friday & saturday, so i wonder if yuki will crash into liam on the race

username45 imagine if he wins in a vcarb

username46 then y/n would probably pass away

username45 i think yuki will at first

username47 IM CRYING NOT LIAM ADDING A SELFIE OF HIM AND YUKI AS IF HE DIDNT POST A DUMP OF HIM TAKING OUT YUKI'S SISTER ON A DATE ELPPPP

username48 STUNNING.

username49 the selfie is so cute tho

username50 THE PHOTOGRAPHY?? THE AESTHETIC?? THE RED DRESS?? I FEAR Y/N LICKED EVERYTHING CLEAN. liam is okay i guess

username51 ONGGGG. yeah hes fine ig

username52 FRRR. would give him a solid 6/10 for effort

username53 THE REAL IT WAG AND IT DRIVER

username54 i cried because this

username55 WE NEED MORE Y/N IN THE PADDOCK FOR MORE YUKI WINS (manifesting he'll win out of pure rage when he sees y/n and liam together) 🔥🔥🗣

username56 liam dont forget us when you become y/n's husband

username57 THE SECOND PIC IS SO FUNNY IM SHITTING MY PANTS

username58 id let him hit me with his car

username59 i'd let y/n hit me with his car

username60 mama y papa

username61 oh yuki i feel so bad for you

username62 SOBBING I JS REALISED YUKI DIDNT LIKE AND HE LIKES ALL OF LIAMS POSTS

username63 im waiting patiently for the yuki crashout.

username64 i need it asap

username65 if he says blondie ill eat my pet fish for dinner

username66 this relationship is not a want its a NEED

username67 HELLO?? LIAM AND YUKI'S SISTER?? SINCE WHEN??

username68 wait since when did he have a sister

username69 idk probably since she was born (he has 2)

username70 liam x y/n has been a ship sine their redbull academy days people just don't follow the story </3

yourusername aww you look so cute in the selfie

liamlawson30 youre talking? you look so stunning i had a heart attack

yourusername i'm so flattered omg

liamlawson30 i'm glad 😉

yukitsunoda0511 blondie i'm giving you 5 seconds to run as far away as possible before i attack you.

liamlawson30 why? what did i do

yukitsunoda0511 tripped my sister. took her to a dinner DATE. probably kissed her and now winked at her?

liamlawson30 it's an emoji...?

yukitsunoda0511 you didn't deny the kiss.

liamlawson30 oops?

yukitsunoda0511 run blondie. run.

username72 im so confused and excited at the same time

username73 THEYRE GETTING TOGETHER???

username74 how'd he pull

username75 if liam can get y/n by being a pathetic simp why can't i pull her like this?? life is unfair

username76 manifesting a podium for him and isack idk how but i'll build an engine from the ground and i'll harvest the chassis from the earth

yukitsunoda0511 it's good that you're drinking up your last moments with my sister since you won't have any after i get to you

yourusername yuki wtf

liamlawson30 uh...

yukitsunoda0511 tick tock, blondie.

liamlawson30 should i be worried for myself or him

yourusername both 🤍

liamlawson30 not too reassuring, love

yourusername oh...😊 i blushed

yukitsunoda0511 LOVE??????? AND WHO BLUSHED

yourusername ME !!

yukitsunoda0511 why are you so proud to admit that you blushed because blondie called you 'love'

yourusername it's cuteee 😊😊😊

liamlawson30 you're cuter

yourusername stoppp tyy

yukitsunoda0511 the audacity to do this infront of me...

yourusername fuck off then

liamlawson30 y/n has anyone ever told you you're very hot when you swear

yukitsunoda0511 you blonde idiot if you don't shut your mouth i will stitch it shut for you

username77 this modern cinema btw

username78 im like 109% sure y/n is giggling at liam's comments

username79 bro i'm gonna kms this is too beautiful to let go of

username80 the look of lovee.....

yourusername

liked by liamlawson30, isackhadjar, visacashapprb and 926K others

yourusername he tripped me and then took me out to dinner and now he's my boyfriend 😊 (photo dump ver.) Tagged: liamlawson30

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username81 HELP IM SOBBING HE TRIPPED HER??

yourusername liam was too busy staring at me (according to some sources *cough* yuki *cough* and accidentally ran into me (he didn't move out the way bc he was busy staring, according to the sources) so i tripped and cut my legs

username81 sobbing 😭 at least he apologised by taking you out to dinner

username82 yuki not liking this LMAOOOO

username83 AWWW LIAM AND Y/N HUGGING WHILE SHES IN VCARB MERCH IS SO CUTE

username84 4 cuts is crazyyyy

username85 I WANT TO BE A WAG

username86 imagine being this pretty sigh

oracleredbullracing ❤ Liked by creator

username87 EH???????

username88 girl what

username89 REDBULL????

username90 i cannot tell if like admin did this or someone else did

username91 HELP WHAT

username92 NOOOO IT'S OFFICIAL

username93 stop i feel so bad for yuki imagine your sister getting together with your old teammate

username94 ITS OFFICIAL??

username95 yuki wdc trust

username96 holy fuck shes beautiful

username97 where to buy a liam asking for a friend

username98 'boyfriend' MY SHAYLAAAAAAAAAAAA

username99 im waiting for the edits of them

username100 how is yuki functioning i'd kms

liamlawson30 i'm glad you enjoyed dinner ❤ so happy to be called your boyfriend i've been waiting a year to be called that

yourusername loved the song you wrote for me <3 it was so cute!!

yukitsunoda0511 WHAT

yukitsunoda0511 YOU WROTE A WHOLE SONG YOU BLONDE CREEP??

liamlawson30 you laughed when i told you about it...?

yourusername what face was he making and how'd he pronounce the laugh

liamlawson30 nvm i just realised he was mad/sarcastic laughing

yourusername i loved the song though

liamlawson30 i loved being with you

yourusername and i love you

yukitsunoda0511 EH??? WHAT??? LOVE?? YOURE TOO YOUNG FOR LOVE YOU DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT LOVE IS

yourusername fuck off yuki just because you don't have rizz doesn't mean i get to suffer

liamlawson30 i think i've fallen all over again

yourusername mwahhh ily

liamlawson30 my face is the 'AWOOGA' gif rn

yourusername HELP

yukitsunoda0511 it's not funny.

yourusername stay mad xx

yourusername you wouldn't get it old man

yukitsunoda0511 call me old one more time i'll show you and blondie what's old

yourusername oh! that's.... assuring

liamlawson30 should i be worried or...?

yukitsunoda0511 actually yes. very worried blondie

yourusername i'm not scared

yukitsunoda0511 you should be 😈

yourusername what the hell did they feed you in redbull

yukitsunoda go there yourself to find out

liamlawson30 over my DEAD BODY y/n is not leaving me <3

yukitsunoda0511 you're in an unsafe area lawson

yourusername you didn't call him blondie!! that's an improvement <3

liamlawson30 i think yuki likes me now

yourusername what if he's in love and is jealous because we got together

liamlawson30 that would explain why he's so mad

yukitsunoda0511 I'M NOT IN LOVE WITH LIAM

liamlawson30 don't worry yuki it's a safe space

yourusername it's okay yuki i won't get jealous

yukitsunoda0511 i won't even say anything i'm blocking both of you

username101 all grown adults btw

username102 i would've fainted she's like a renaissance painting

username103 dont know if i should be happy or sad that they're officialy together

username104 both because we lost y/n to liam and because the otp became true

username105 HER BEING THE SUPPORTIVE GIRLFRIEND MY HEARTTTTT

username106 i hope they become unhinged asl

username107 new y/n fans will never get to experience liam flirting in her comments and yuki reporting every single one

username108 FRRR like those were a key part in their relationship

username109 me and y/n are in a parasocial relationship btw

username110 they are my parents. no argument.

liamlawson30

liked by yourusername, yukitsunoda0511, isackhadjar and 1.3M others

liamlawson30 beach day with my stunning beautiful amazing lovely angelic heavenly girlfriend... and her older brother who kind of hates me less now? Tagged: yourusername, yukitsunoda0511

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username111 PRETYYYY

username112 they look 3 feet tall 😭

username113 HELLO?? THE SECOND PIC?? THE FLOWERS?? IM DECEASED

username114 yuki is my husband

yukitsunoda0511 you're lucky my sister loves you and i love my sister

yourusername aww yuki that's so cute

liamlawson30 i'm lucky i love your sister too

yukitsunoda0511 why'd you have to ruin it

yourusername it's okay he gave me a massive bouquet of my fav flowers

yukitsunoda0511 i can see by the picture he posted

liamlawson30 doesn't y/n look very stunning? i thought i died and an angel appeared infront of me

yourusername stopp i'm blushing ❤

yukitsunoda0511 cringe

yourusername no one asked yuki

liamlawson30 is he still jealous that he didn't get with me

yourusername yeah probably

yukitsunoda0511 I DON'T LOVE LIAM

liamlawson30 stay in denial babe

yukitsunoda0511 do NOT call me babe you blonde fart

yourusername blonde fart??

liamlawson30 first time i heard that one

yukitsunoda0511 shut up i couldn't come up with an insult

liamlawson30 then why'd you have to insult me

yukitsunoda0511 idk probably because you're dating my sister

liamlawson30 aren't we friends

yourusername i'm scared what's happening

yukitsunoda0511 shut up y/n we're talking

yourusername okay then....

yukitsunoda0511 such kind words to your loving brother

yourusername i'll kill you

yourusername i didn't even say anything

liamlawson30 to be fair you said you'd kill him

yourusername you're supposed to be on my side

liamlawson30 sorry love

yourusername blushing giggling and kicking my feet rn

yukitsunoda0511 all because he called you love??

yourusername shut up it's cute

liamlawson30 you're cuter

yukitsunoda0511 you two already had this convo it's getting boring 😐

liamlawson30 i'm glad we're annoying you 🤍

username115 yuki development arc lowkey??

username116 the phone selfie is so adorable omgg

username117 Y/NLIAM CONTENT LETS GOOOOOOO

username118 liam pls tell us everything that happened word by word please

username119 Y/N AND YUKI APPEARANCES LETS FUCKING GOOOO

username120 YES YES YES YES i dont understand why but yeah IM SO HAPPY THEYRE TOGETHER LIKE ITS OFFICIAL OFFICIAL

yourusername i love you so much you look so handsome

liamlawson30 i love you more my beloved princess 🫶 i had so much fun thank you for making it bearable with yuki insulting me every 8 seconds

yourusername anytime dārin 💙

yukitsunoda0511 don't bring japanese into this

liamlawson30 i swear my belt was buckled a second ago

yukitsunoda0511 BLONDIE ITS SO OVER FOR YOU

yourusername seeing you shirtless makes me want to impregnate you

liamlawson30 i'll defy human biology just for you <3

yourusername see ladies this is how a man should be

yukitsunoda0511 who are you talking to

yourusername the audience

yourusername also stop replying to every comment let us have our moment

username121 STOPP MY HEART CANT TAKE THIS SHES SO PRETTYA ND LIAM IM MALFUCNTIONING

username122 girl is a fake tsunoda

username123 sigh

username124 waiting for y/n to drop posts of this trip like a wife waiting for her husband's letters from war in the 1900s

username125 HELP

username126 omg i died

username127 SHES WITH LIAM NOW?? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

username128 rest in peace tsunoda y/n, you will be missed. welcome y/n lawson

username129 LEGIT PASSED OUT SHES SO GORGEOUS

username130 cuties omg

yukitsunoda0511 i guess you two are a tiny bit cute afterall

yourusername omg stoppp ty yuki i know how hard this was for you

liamlawson30 but you know what's cuter?

yukitsunoda0511 if i hear you say that she's cuter again i'll mail you into the ocean

liamlawson30 just showing appreciation to my beautiful angelic girlfriend

yourusername love youuu 🫶 🤍

liamlawson30 i love you more 🤍

yourusername

liked by liamlawson30, yukitsunoda0511, isackhadjar and 987K others

yourusername you adored me before, oh, my good looking boy Tagged: liamlawson30

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username131 im deceased

username132 THE KISS? THE SUNFLOWER?? THE HEADPHONES?? THIS IS TOP TIER LOVE

username133 LETS GO us girlies won yuki can smd

yukitsunoda0511 why are you two kissing? didn't need to see that

liamlawson30 your sister was looking really hot This comment has been deleted

liamlawson30 can't help my love for y/n

yukitsunoda0511 i saw the first comment, blondie. you're on thin ice

username134 gang go check out the y/n and liam update accs they uploaded the whole saga of their love story from the flirting a year ago to him tripping her to the dinner its so cute

username135 the most gorgeous couple

username136 THE SECOND PIC IS SO CUTE HELLO???

username137 liam was winning both ways

username138 PLEASEEEEE

username139 ICONIC.

username140 IUHGBSN????????????

username141 i didnt believe in love until i saw them

username142 FACE CARD IS LETHAL

username143 SUKI WATERHOUSE OMD OMD AND THE LYRICS FIT THEM TOO

username144 SOBBING i love them sm

username145 if glazing them every single second was a crime id be 89 feet under

username146 GOD HAS FAVOURITES !!!

username147 MY HEARTTTT THIS IS SO ADORABLEEE

username148 counting down the days tilll we get y/n appearance in the paddock

username149 the people's princess and her husband

username150 STOP i just realised that yuki liked this ITS OVER WE WON

username151 the aura from them is DIABOLICAL

username152 THATS SO....?? OMG FINALLY THEY CAN FREELY IN LOVE

username153 i NEED a relationship like this (both with my brother and bf)

username154 OMG THATS SO FUNNY KILL ME

username155 i died bc LIAM LIKED BEFORE YUKIII

username156 GET THIS GIRL HER RING liamlawson30 LIKE NOWWWWWW

username157 they need to get married ASAP

liamlawson30 i love you so so so so much

yourusername forever and always

liamlawson30 until the end

yourusername 🫶🫶

liamlawson30 🤍🤍🤍🤍

yukitsunoda0511 my favourite sister and her boyfriend, i guess

liamlawson30 thank you yuki! really appreciate you approving of this relationship

yourusername what about miu

yukitsunoda0511 don't tell her anything...

yourusername fine. but let me go over to liam's house instead of taking my car keys

yukitsunoda0511 fine..

yourusername LIAM HERE I COME

liamlawson30 MY GIRLFRIEND WILL COME OVER TO MY HOUSE

liamlawson30 btw i love you more than anything in this entire universe my angelic heavnely beloved y/n

yourusername i love you more than you'd ever know, pretty boy

yukitsunoda0511 GET A ROOM

minako.tsunoda be nice to your sister yuki

yukitsunoda0511 i'm not 5

yourusername then act like it

liamlawson30 guys stop fighting

yourusername HE STARTED IT

yukitsunoda0511 NO???

yourusername YES???

liamlawson30 now we have to wait while they sort it out

liamlawson30 which could take decades

minako.tsunoda seems like it

username158 FUCKING FUCK OFF THIS IS SO CUTE ALSO THEIR MOM BONDING WITH LIAM???

username159 ok thats it im jumpiing off a cliff

username160 ive never seen something more romantic and its in a fucking instagram post

username161 im actually crying

username162 i love them so much i hope nothing ever happens to them

username163 my heart is paining i cant take this anymore

username164 i need to know what yuki feels about y/n dating his bsf

yourusername they were never friends.

liamlawson30 this worked out better than we thought

yourusername yeah i didnt think we'd get so much love from yuki

yukitsunoda0511 is this sarcasm

yourusername what do you think you shortie

yukitsunoda0511 haha so kind

username165 bye i cant with them

username166 HELO WHAT DID Y/N MEAN WITH 'they were never friends' ???

username167 the a in liam lawson starts for a lovesick fool for y/n

username168 THE WAY THEY STARE AT EACH OTHERRR>>>>>

username169 how i wish for love like this

username170 greatest love story frrr

liamlawson30 i love you so much, my stunning angel

yourusername i love you too, my beautiful love

liamlawson30 forver?

yourusername and always

liamlawson30 until the end

yourusername ilyyyyyy

liamlawson30 i love you too

yukitsunoda0511 i guess the love is true after all, take care of my sister blondie

liamlawson30 i'd rather die than let her get hurt

yukitsunoda0511 good. you have my approval then

to be continued..?

taglist . . . @barcapix ,, @f1lover55 ,, @ilovebarcaaaa ,, @httpsdana ,, @paucubarsisimp ,, @justaf1girl ,, @awritingtree ,, @freyathehuntress ,, @chilling-seavey ,, @eloriis ,, @linnygirl09 ,, @joaosnovia ,, @damonsalvatorelikessex ,, @somerandomf1fan ,, @kevinlolwife ,, @veyveyx (lmk if you want to join the taglist!)

[infamous-if]

– update

Hello! I don't think I've done these in a while but just wanted to share that I'm going through the bugs and errors slowly but surely. The bug of the infinite loading screen/Blake bug is one that I can't fix because it works for others and then doesn't for some. I'm definitely going to make a new link and probably new save files to avoid that once I release the first patch! Sorry 'bout that.

This was sent to me from the cog forum: A lovely redditor told me to play the game all the way to that point through your browser (I had Safari) save it before you hit the infinite load. Then go to the author’s Tumblr page and load the demo through there then load your save. That worked a charm for me.

Hopefully that works for now!

Having said that, I'm hoping to choose beta testers once the first patch is done. If you aren't chosen this round don't fret, I'll definitely need more and more as the game gets bigger! :) I think it'll be by a chapter-by-chapter basis, though I'm not completely sure yet. Sorry about the long wait. Infamous is still my first IF and anything that doesn't relate to just…writing is something I still struggle with, in other words idk what im doing ❤️ /lh

I've started preparing the Patreon content for this month! thanks for your patience! I just wanted to get the chapter out before focusing on anything else.

And finally I have the outlines for 4/5 done. They're a bare-bones skeleton bullet pointed deal which gives me freedom to pin down the scenes when I do scene outlines but I'm excited for chapter 4 and to write the next week on tour! Chapter 3 felt a little like an intermission hahah which at least gives us a breather before jumping back into it.

That's all! Happy everyone enjoyed chapter three. Thank you :)

[stsgooo]

moonlit goddess.... maybe jinshi is wondering why his dear maid continues to pull away from him... and maybe gao shun lets it slip that "they shouldn't have been close that day anyway".... and jinshi pesters him until he folds n explains.... IDK I JUST WANT A HAPPY ENDING FOR THOSE TWO :((((( (not forced ofc!! i jus love ur writing!)

Bridge the Gap.

✩࿐ summary: life and death really makes a girl wonder.

warning(s): idiots in love, chapters 61-65 manga spoilers, master/servant like relationship, description of near drowning, suggestive content, ambiguous ending. wc; 9.3k

pairing(s): jinshi/fem!reader.

a/n: tysm for reading my fics means the world to hear ppl actually enjoy them, anon!!! ;') i wasn't really going to make a 2nd part of moonlight goddess as i thought it was okay to leave off there, but i love jinshi sooo i'll take any excuse to write him. this was initially going to be a part 2 of clumsiness, but i figured my plans worked better with what you were envisioning! im not entirely sure how to feel about this, but i hope this lives up to the standards! i apologize for any mistakes, this was written mostly in the early mornings when i had time!

part i. m.list

"Are you sure I'm not hurting you?"

"Y/N, please, stop asking me that."

"Oh, yes. My apologies, Jinshi-sama. Sorry."

This were, admittedly, not going well. Both of you soaked, hair dripping, and standing in the cave behind a rapid waterfall, and a dull ache in your chest as you recovered. Partly your fault, partly the fault of some crazed marksman that was hiding in the forest, trying to slaughter Jinshi and, by proxy, you.

To understand how you two ended up in this situation, we would have to back up a bit.

"Oh? Y/N, I didn't know you'd be attending this as well?"

"It was a last minute switch with Suiren and I."

"You... enjoy these hunts?"

"I've done everything I could to avoid them in the years past."

Your lack of excitement was apparent and clear. It appeared to bring no ease of mind to Maomao who dragged her rather disgusted eyes from you towards Gaoshun. The older man just kept his attention on the moving scenery outside, a distant glaze over his eyes.

Maomao obviously wasn't optimistic. Just like you. You were almost proud that she had caught on so easily.

The sweltering heat outside seemed to seep into the carriage, cooking you alive in your rather formal wear. Something that you were spotted in far and few, having been years that you truly cleaned yourself prim and proper. You had been on the edge of declining even going when Jinshi, with a grin and a certain glitter in his eyes, had too happily informed you that it was a direct invitation from Shishou.

Your fate had been sealed.

Maomao peeked at you from the corner of her eye, head tilted, "Do you mind me asking why you avoided these events?"

You don't even spare her a glance, "I fear if I spoke my honest opinion, I'd stain Jinshi-sama's reputable name with my foul mouth." You reply flatly in return.

"Please don't." Gaoshun said softly from his seat, looking particularly tired.

You decided to ignore the slump of Maomao's shoulders as if disappointed by the swift interruption and decline on Gaoshun's part. Turning your eyes towards the shifting world outside.

It'd been exactly five months since Jinshi had danced under the moon and you came to the conclusion that any impure thoughts you held for your master would be safely tucked away in the back of your mind (and heart). Forever your secret. Only to be heard in your dreams and upon your death, when you repent for any ill thoughts to the Great Man above.

Everything had returned to its normal routine. You would get up in the morning, prepare breakfast alongside Suiren, eat, then proceed with any chores the woman gave you for the rest of the day, then repeat. Equally, your relationship (or lack thereof) with Jinshi had remained the same. Conversations filled with pleasantries. Simple things that had always lingered between the two of you since you were children. Pleasant and simple. As the world shall ever be.

It got a bit ruffled with Jinshi had cornered you and practically ordered that you come to the hunt instead of Suiren.

In the middle of scrubbing away at the floors, he had found you. Stood above you with that grin, “Y/N, you’re one of my most loyal servants, hm?” He’d begun with an inflection in his tone that made you horribly hesitant.

You had faltered in your scrubbing to stare up at him with confusion, “Uh…well, I suppose, Jinshi-sam’s.”

“Why don’t you join me for the Hunt this up coming week?”

Your had heart dropped. And, by the look Gaoshun had dawned, his had too. The Hunt, in your humble opinion, was a glorified weekend for the men in high positions to rub one off while killing animals. It wasn’t something you found interesting in or much grace. That’s why you had declined Suiren’s question on whether or not you’d like to take her place only three days prior. You had no interest in watching anyone, even Jinshi, size each other up while a defenseless animal bled.

“Jinshi-sama, I believe Suiren—“

Ever the gentleman, he had cut you off, “No worries, Suiren agreed to take over matters while you’re gone! She’s the sweetest, right?” He had appeared all to eager and all too himself for you to ignore.

So, with a heavy heart, you’d sighed, accepting defeat and his invitation.

Now, you would find your torture for a multiple day retreat with a bunch of men with their c—

The carriage came to an abrupt halt, bringing an unruly end to your thoughts as you all carefully exited and were greeted by the sunshine. The humid air heavy with the condensation of the area and already making a sweat appear on your brow. But, ever the lady, you pleasantly tuck your hands into your sleeves and follow behind Gaoshun and Basen.

You were a little surprised as Maomao stuck closely to your side; but not all too surprised to find her attention on your surroundings, vague surprise in her eyes. The area was as equally as beautiful as it was a burden to you.

The buildings weren't anything for you to revel at. Spending an entire lifetime within palaces and in buildings as equally or above standard to those, it just wasn't anything special. The nature surrounding the area, however, was something to stare in awe at. Lucious trees, beautiful grass, and beautiful array of plants and flowers. It almost made you regret all the time you had spent away from this place.

But it wasn't like you had the chance to truly return since the last time you were here. Nothing could bring back that little girl.

You deterred your thoughts away as Gaoshun slid the door open. Immediately, you were hit with a wave of heat that you made you tense up. It was apparent that you wouldn't find your much needed cool down you were desperate to find since you were confined in the carriage days prior.

You were the last to enter and when you did, you faltered at the sight before you.

Jinshi was sprawled across the couch, wisps of his dark hair framed his sweat glistened face, eyes closed in contempt. A small dent appeared between his eyebrows and a frown adorned his face. However, your attention was caught on a drop of sweat that made its way from his hairline, down his cheek, his jaw, his long slender neck, and past his— his collar.

His modesty was of no worry, apparently, as he laid with his robes parted open to reveal his chest. Itself was glistening with sweat. Delicate skin on showcase for all to see. It brought a soft blush to your cheeks, as you blatantly ogled him. Pressing your lips together to contain whatever thoughts you had about him from burst from your seams.

"Y/N," Jinshi's voice hit your ears, tender and smooth. You're suddenly hyperaware that he's staring at you with raised brows, lids peeked open to stare at you.

You straighten your back and offer a bow, "Jinshi-sama. Do you require anything?" You had to get it together. It was inappropriate to behave in such a scandalous way. "Request for ice? Tea?"

Jinshi shook his head, sitting up, "No, rather I'd like for you to rest after such a long journey."

You falter, your arms wavering from their position in front of your face, "Uh.... Wouldn't the room be more tolerable with some ice?" You spare a glance around the room and grimace. The windows are shut tight, only bits of sun peeking through the cracks. Basen looks rather miserable, but trying to appear his usual stern self. While Gaoshun and Maomao seem rather okay with showcasing their small discontent with the heat. A nice cube would help at least cool down a bit.

You also couldn't stand another second seeing Jinshi like that. As if he were some type of nymph testing your faith.

"Really, it's fine—" Jinshi attempted, but you were already turning on your heel.

"I will return with ice." You didn't miss the way Jinshi's face fell and his eyes cut to Gaoshun who shook his head in return.

Your fast paced adventure led you to the main hall, where people were moving in and out. Various officers and servants filled the area, finding their rooms or helping their masters and fellow officers to their own rooms. Everyone appeared to be feeling the heat as they wiped their brows. Much like you, they appeared to be attempting to defeat the heat.

You found your way towards an attendant who helped you get something situated for Kousen. Something that brought you both distaste and irritation. Something to be addressed at a later time.

Joy filled you as you turned around, ice would soon be in the room and you could crowd around it like it was a new lover.

As you were about to make your way back to the room, you ran into someone.

You were about to apologize when they whirled around and you let out an audibly sigh that conveyed your unwavering exhaustion for them.

"Hey, watch where— Oh, hey, " Lihaku blinked, kind face twisted up in vague recognition. “You’re that lady-in-waiting. What are you doing out here?”

“I’m on loan from Jinshi-sama,” you answered rather flatly, not missing the small frown accompanying the man’s face.

You were vaguely familiar with Lihaku. What with Maomao getting involved in the problems within the inner and rear palace, you were bound to make new acquaintances when she was dragging you around. Lihaku was the first one you had ran into. On orders to accompany the girl from Suiren, you had gotten to see her investigative skills firsthand. You were impressed, surely, when she had made the discovery about the potatoes. But the impression was overshadowed by Lihaku, who had spent the entire time chatting your ear off.

He was kind, handsome, and smart when it called for it. But you could tell that, like most officers, he had an airheaded vibe to him. One that deterred you from making things too complicated with him.

Friendly enough, and one of the few people that didn't seem to disinterest Maomao, you accepted his very vague and shadowed feature in your life.

"Well, that's nice of him." He said, clearly disinterested in where this conversation was going. "I'm glad to see a friendly face, though."

You offered a small smile, "As am I. Not many kind faces around here often."

"You can say that again." You hear a loud inhuman snort and a tug on your gown, taking a large step back, you look down. A large dog with drool leaking out from the sides of its mouth stared back at you. "Oh, hey, boy, no!"

"O-Oh my." You uttered, slightly breathless as you looked at the large beast.

Lihaku glanced at you, offering a withering smile, "Eh, sorry, he gets excited around new people— not a great trait in a dog like this, you would think, but he's a real gem. Just has his moments. Hey, now—"

Lihaku pulled out something metal and brought it to his lips, then blew. It emitted little to no sound, at least, any you could truly hear, making your perk up when the dog tilted his head and sat respectfully before the officer. He blew again and the dog laid. Again, and the dog stood on all fours.

You smiled softly, watching in wonder as it obeyed whatever silent orders it was getting from Lihaku.

"He's very smart." You observed as the dog sat down again.

"Right?" Lihaku beamed, "I can get him to come running from kilometers away if need be."

"Useful when you're in a bind."

"For sure!" Lihaku's demeanor reminded you of a proud father as he puffed his chest and looked distastefully towards the cages lined up outside. "He's real smart, yet they still want to use those birds in the end."

You didn't want to point out the various problems that could come with using a dog; as there were probably another list of various pros to actually use the dog. The hawks had been used for years and you doubt that some dogs would be taking their place any time soon. It'd probably be a long time before these arrogant men came to their senses and found better means. Despite dogs being loyal and determined to their cause, the hawk would always be chosen.

Or, the better alternative, they didn't do this hunt anymore.

But you knew that was a longshot.

It wasn't long after that you bid Lihaku a farewell and good luck on his duties, making your way back to the room. You exchanged pleasant smiles and greetings with familiar faces, but nothing that kept you from relaxing much longer.

When you returned to the room, everyone had found their own areas and activities to occupy themselves. Gaoshun and Basen were playing Go near the windows, Maomao was reclining on the floor where a sliver or air was flowing through (from where, you weren't completely sure). Jinshi was back to sitting on the couch, a book in his hands. Something that was quickly disregarded as you gently closed the door behind you.

"The ice should be up soon." You informed the room with a respectful bow.

Jinshi didn't look at all interested, "What took you so long?" It sounded like contempt. Irritation if you had to really dig. Something that made you falter.

You look up and see the pout on his lips— childish, as always. "Oh, I'm sorry, Jinshi-sama. I happened to run into a friend and got caught up in conversation." You apologized softly. The last thing you wanted to do was bring him more annoyance and disturbance.

He straightened considerably, "A friend?"

You didn't like the way it was spoken. A touch of disbelief was enough for you to eye him with your own distaste. Even if you and Lihaku were nothing more than strangers with vague familiarity with one another.

"Yes, a friend." You confirmed with thin lips. Despite your inner voice telling you to reign in your attitude, you upturn your nose and decide to join Maomao— whose eyes were shooting between the both of you with trepidation and vague sympathy. "He was being kind."

Jinshi huffed, "I didn't know you had any secret friends."

"Not a secret. Just don't find any time to speak about it with you, Jinshi-sama."

That made the man falter, a darkened shadow over his face. "I suppose." He frowned heavily now, squinting at you with something unreadable. "Who is this friend of yours?"

You, finding no reason to lie, continued on, "Officer Lihaku."

In an instant, three heads snapped to you with varying degrees of emotions. Maomao looked shocked, but welcomed the information with a shrug. Gaoshun looked pale and overwrought, for whatever reason you weren't entirely sure, but you had an itching feeling it had to do with Jinshi.

The same Jinshi that was now face down on the couch, letting out a miserable sound. Speaking into the fabric of it all, unintelligiable. But you swore you heard something along the lines of— "that second rate, again?!" As he continued to rant and cry.

With that, you decided it best to not involve yourself with whatever Jinshi was battling. You wouldn't win anyway.

You'd always hated Kousen-sama.

He almost always seemed to loom in the shadows. An masked man who held no personality or words of his own. Pleasantries offered out of necessity and not because that was simply the right thing to do. He was mysterious. He hardly appeared, but he was always there. A reminder for what things would return to one odd day. A symbol for exactly where your loyalties and master lied.

Kousen-sama was to always appear before others with his mask on. To avoid them seeing the ghastly sight of scars and blemishes that adorned his skin because of his sickness (whatever that may be) and spare him the indecency of stares. He was unmoving. Stone amongst he lively environment that ate away at their lunches and softly conversed with one another.

Prince. The respectable Kousen-sama. The great son of the empire. The brave prince against all odds.

Oh, how much you hate Kousen-sama.

But you still had woken up early to help him pin his hair back. To slip his robes on. To delicately place the mask on, fingering the bangs out through the slits to allow some type of familiarity. You were his confidant. His reliable and kind servant.

As always, you and Basen stood behind Kousen-sama with your backs straight and eyes ahead. A pleasant servant on loan and stern guard, you both were familiar faces against the unrecognizable figure in front of you. It reminded the people exactly who was before them. Exactly who had decided to grace their presence.

Still, it brought you discomfort.

You still eyed Gaoshun in the corner of you eye. The older man sat at the other end of the table. Maomao standing behind him with a distant look in her eyes, obviously not paying attention to the things happening around her. Not entirely surprising, but you felt the overwhelming urge to scold her for her lack in etiquette.

Oh, you're starting to think like Suiren, aren't you?

Suddenly, Basen is tensing up beside you and Kousen-sama is turning his head away from a scowling Shishou. Your eyes snap between the two with a scowl of your own. Whatever that man had said—

Kousen-sama's hand clenches. So tightly that his knuckles turn white and he shakes. You know something isn't right. You had missed something. Something so obvious and you were too concerned about Gaoshun.

The man stands from his chair, the legs loudly clattering against the tiled and stone floor. You watch uneasily as Kousen-sama raises, takes a moment to collect himself, then practically speeds away from the room. You don't waste a moment to bring your sleeve covered hands to your mouth and make your own exit.

As you pass a concerned Maomao and Gaoshun, you hear a barely uttered whisper from the girl— heat. Food.

You try to hide your confusion and worry as you follow behind your master.

It doesn't take you long to find him.

Down the path, up against a tree, the masked figure was hunched and obviously breathing heavily. You draw closer, outstretching a hand to gently press it against the large expanse of his back.

"Kousen-sama, are you quite alright?" You ask softly, hunching slightly to capture a glimpse of his eyes from that slit in the fabric.

When you do, you're almost breathless. His violet eyes are alight with something distant and scornful. Eyebrows furrowed as he meets your own gaze.

"Y/N...?" He sounded vaguely surprised under it all, breathless himself. As if he couldn't quite believe that you were here in front of him.

You nod once, reaching out and grabbing ahold of one of the ties keeping the mask all together. "I'm going to remove this. No one is around."

His hand is suddenly wrapped around your wrist. Not tight or unrelenting, but enough to make you freeze. Warm and clammy skin against your own to make you feel scorched. You don't need to see his entire face to know that his jaw was clenched now.

"I can't," he said in all his self-assuredness, "Someone might still come."

What a pain. You thought to yourself as you draw in a heavy breath.

You don't waste a second to slip under his arm, wrapping it around your shoulders and allowing him to lean most of his weight against you. "No worries, sir, I'll just find us some place where no one else is around."

You gently guide Kousen-sama from the line of trees and deep within it. Finding an oddly familiar path created within your mind to follow that takes you towards an overflowing waterfall. A loud crash of water hitting the rocks and body of water below that brought you a distant sense of comfort. The refreshing smell of the water hits your nostrils and you take a deep breath.

With Kousen-sama against you, you felt the sweltering heat hit you tenfold. But the mist from the waterfall brushed against your skin like a gently caress from an old lover.

This is it.

You stumble over to one of the few trees next to the waterfall and gently guide Kousen-sama to sit up against it. The man took a heavy breath and you finally felt a little at ease. Reaching forward, you moved to take the cloth off once again and then—

A loud thud and chunks of dirt hit your cheek.

You frowned, looking to the ground only a could feet away and saw a small crater. A sharp smell filled your senses and you stiffened. It was an unkind and almost putrid scent. The smoke from the small crater was the main cause.

"Eh—?"

You were suddenly cut off as Kousen-sama wrapped his arms around you, jerking you upwards and away from the tree. You would've basked in the way his body was pressed against your back or the way his fingers seemed to mold into your abdomen— you would've if it weren't for the loud crack in the air then the pieces of bark that flew through the air around you.

The tree that he had been pressed up against only moments ago was now split open with a piece of metal imbedded into the wood. It looked eerily similar to the same that had been in the ground moments ago.

"Is that a feifa?!" His voice pierced through your thoughts, oddly frantic and uneasy as he moved quickly from the tree and towards the river.

You glanced up at him and found him already staring down at you. Eyes narrowed and, if it weren't for the mask, his entire face would be scrunched up in that familiar distaste and panic. Yet he seemed eerily calm as he dragged you through the trees and into the water.

"Sorry, but this is gonna get a bit dramatic." His voice was soft against your head, warm breath caressing your hair as he wraps a protective arm around your head.

Your eyebrows raise, "Dramatic— WHAT?" You should've known his tone and choice of his words were a warning for what was to come, but you were still caught off guard.

He gave no indication that he was going to jump off the cliff.

"Jinshi, you goddamn idiot!"

You mustn't get ideas above your station.

The water was oddly clear. Even with the mix of the overflowing waterfall, under it all was peaceful and calm. Fishes and water like insects lived in harmony.

Cool and calm. Always.

You are there to serve your master.

The little boy's head burst from the water with a big grin, short hair flat against his head and dripping. The sun reflecting off his violet eyes and almost blinded the little girl curled up on the side shore. Her face set into a scowl, clothes drenched, and a looming unimpressed older man behind her.

"It's so nice out, why don't you come in!" Beckoned the boy from the water.

The little girl shot him a nasty look, "You know why, you jerk!"

The boy's grin faltered, tilting his head at his friend, "Eh? Why are you being mean?" His voice wavered on the ends, still just floating in the middle of the basin.

"I'm not mean! You're mean! You're the biggest meanie!" The little girl stood up to throw an accusatory finger at the boy, her sleeve heavy and uncomfortable as she moved.

The boy's face reddened, eyebrows scrunched together, "I'm not mean! You're mean!" He repeated.

"No, you are! You're the biggest meanie in the whole wide world!"

"No, you are!"

"You are! You pushed me into the water!"

"You are! You should swim!"

"I hope you drown, meanie!"

The boy's expression fell completely. A heartbroken glint in his eyes flooding them. His lips trembled. But, before he could do something like cry, he was already swimming deeper

Nothing less, nothing more.

"Now, now," a large hand rested on the little girl's shoulder and gently tugged her back, turning her around to face the man. He seemed to be trying to appear as tender as he could to try calm down the girl's high nerves. "No need to get angry."

"But, Gaoshun—" The little girl whined.

Gaoshun shook his head, patting her shoulder, "No, we don't argue. Try to forgive and forget, yeah?" He reminded the lessons that he'd attempted multiple times to teach the two children. "No reason to walk around with resentment for others, right?"

The little girl scoffed her shoe against the ground, a pout on her lips, "Do I have to, Gaoshun?" She knew what this would call for. Exactly how this would end for her.

The man heaved a sigh, nodding, "Yes, you do. Now, go reconcile. I'll wait here."

The girl faltered as the man raised to his full height, cupping his hands behind his back. She dragged her feet through the soft soil and found her way towards the boy once more. He was grasping onto the edge of the bank, sniffling and snorting. His shoulders shook and his face was stuffed into his arms.

The little girl frowned. "Um... Are you okay?"

The boy stiffened, not turning around as he answered, "No."

"I'm sorry, I said something real mean." The little girl uttered, stepping closer as she clutched her wet clothes. "I just... You pushed me into the water, I can't..."

"I thought you were my friend!" The little boy whirled around on her, face red and eyes filled with big tears. He looked enraged but incredibly disheartened. The girl blinks in return as the boy glares. "You say such mean things to me. Friends aren't supposed to be mean!"

The girl clenched her jaw, "You were mean to me first!" She accused.

The boy sniffled, wiping under his nose with his forearm. "You're my friend." He repeated as if that cleared up any anger.

Nothing more, nothing less.

The little girl slowly sat beside him, her feet dipping under the water. "It is nice." She whispered.

The little boy dragged his eyes upwards, looking hurt but hopeful. "Right?" he asked, equally as quiet.

"You're my friend too, Jinshi." The little girl nudge him with her leg.

Jinshi's eyes twinkled, wide and all too bright, "Really?"

"Really." The little girl confirmed with a toothless grin. "My friend forever and ever!"

Jinshi positively beamed, the water sloshing as he jumped happily. "Forever and ever, and ever!"

"And ever!"

"It's no longer... appropriate for you and Jinshi-sama to be friends."

"I don't... I don't understand. He's my friend."

"His mother no longer finds it appropriate for you to concern yourself with Jinshi."

"But, Gaoshun—"

"No, Y/N. It's over. Come along. Suiren has a present for you."

"He's.... He's my friend...."

"I'm so sorry."

You are to give your life to your master.

The woman paused, back pin straight, as she entered her master's office, finding him curled up in the corner, muttering nonsensically to himself. The guard of said master was watching on with a pitiful expression of his own, only breaking his eyes away when the woman entered the room. His expression only seemed to deepen.

She didn't need to ask. There was an unspoken understanding as to what their master's breakdown was regarding. The Apothecary. The one that had gotten the attention of everyone in the palace as of late. The one that had been causing her great grief as of late— and was about to create more.

"Jinshi-sama?" The woman called softly, stepping closer.

Jinshi's lifeless eyes continued to stare at the floor below him. A gentle rocking seeming to soothe himself from the rages of his mind. "I don't need anything, Y/N. Thank you, kindly." He uttered just as lifelessly.

The devoted servant's chest clenched. Her face flushed as she reached out a wavering hand. To place it delicately against his hunched back. To offer her best comforting words that she could. To distract him away from her.

Any inappropriate behavior will be punished, severely.

She faltered. This wasn't her place. This wasn't a part of her duties unless Jinshi said so. Inappropriate behavior wasn't called for. It will be punished severly.

Retracting her hand, she stands, and offers a respectful bow. "Please call me if you need anything, Jinshi-sama." And left him in his dark corner.

"Gaoshun, may I ask you something?"

"Of course, Jinshi-sama."

"You have been in my life for as long as I can remember. You remember more than I possibly could about my younger years. Whatever happened to cause me and Y/N to fall apart?"

"...."

"It had to be around the time I was eight that I noticed we were growing apart. Even now, I see it so clearly."

"It's been a long time, Jinshi-sama. You're no longer children."

"All the more reason to know, isn't it?"

"I don't know...."

"Gaoshun, nothing will come of it. I'm simply curious."

"..."

"I'm sorry to put you in this position. Please return to what you were doing."

"Jinshi-sama.... you might not like the truth..."

"I usually don't."

"Where to begin.... Before her eighth birthday—"

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"H....E—"

Everything felt so muffled. Faraway. Featherlight.

Was that a pressure against your chest? A thump that came into quick successions, then stopped. For something soft and ever so delicate to press against your lips?

Everything was distant. So far away from your grasp. From your state of being. As if you were already long gone from whatever reality you were in moments ago.

"H—"

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It was almost like floating. A gentle sway and a crack.

A joyful gliding against the sky that soothed you away from worries and woes.

Thump. Thump. Lips.

Repeating endlessly. Happily. Wetly?

Thump. Thump. Lips.

You welcomed it. Whatever it was. Whatever kept the rhythm. The wonderful rhythm.

Thump. Thump. Lips.

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Thump. Thump. Lips.

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Thump. Thump. Lips.

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Thump. Thump. Lips.

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Thump. Thump. Lips.

.............

Thump. Thump. Lips.

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THUMP. THUM—

You shot up with a cough.

Your throat burned and head ached terribly. Your eyes almost felt like they were about to pop out of your head and roll away. You felt horrible.

It didn't help that you were drenched from head to toe either.

Beside you, there was a heavy and loud sigh of relief as he fell to his backside. He let a silence fall over you both as you recovered, hand pressed against your throat and heaving.

Jesus. Had you almost...

The thought alone almost made you sick.

"I'm sorry. I thought.... I didn't think you still couldn't swim." His voice was soft, barely heard over the waterfall. Kind and cautious, worried and terrified. Things that seeped from his tone as if it were bleeding out and bearing all its insides to you.

Exposing him to you.

You peeked over your loose strands of hair to glare viciously at him. "When would I have the time to learn to swim?" You shot back ruthlessly, not entirely caring from etiquette in this moment. "You've lost your mind."

"Right." Jinshi immediately agreed, almost looking fearful as he watched you.

You push yourself up and take in a deep breath, coughing slightly at the burn of your throat. Taking in your surroundings, you swore that this was that—

"Are you really alright?"

You glanced back at the man and found him still sat on the damp ground. His eyebrows are furrowed and a small frown on his lips as he stared up at you. It made you uncomfortable. To see such a glittering violet staring back at you earnestly. Honestly.

You instead clutch onto your dress, "Suiren is gonna kill me." You scoff, tugging the garments apart.

You could hear Jinshi sputter behind you. The gravel and dirt below him crunching as he probably scrambled up from his spot.

You spared a feeble look over your shoulder to find him with his eyes clenched slowed, hand covering your body from his gaze. You snap your gaze back around and tug the fabric a little too hard as you scoff.

You wouldn't deny the pang of hurt that clenched your chest.

"Don't worry, Jinshi-sama, you won't have to see my unruly body of mine for long. I just want to make sure Suiren doesn't slaughter me when we return."

"I— No, I'm just— okay." He finally muttered.

You are stripped down to your underthings, placing the dress and various pieces on the ground as delicately as you can to avoid too much dirt being stained into the fabric.

As you place the last bit of clothing down, you hear the flutter of fabric behind you.

Jinshi is a bright red, gently tossing his robe down behind him. His back is facing you and you know its for whatever mock sense of modesty he wants to give the both of you. You instinctively reach out and take his robe in your grasp, twisting it and squeezing it to watch out a fair amount of water drip out.

"You worry about mine later. Take care of your things first."

Yeah, right, You think as you twist it with an unrelenting grip. You are there to serve your master. It's one of the first things you learn. His needs came before your own. His needs were your needs.

Jinshi snatched the robe away and squeezed the fabric tight, an overflowing amount of water released from the cloth and into the ground.

Okay, so maybe he was better at it than you.

You nod, turning your attention towards your own garments and try to ignore the overwhelming feeling that you had eyes on your rear.

"So, um—" Jinshi cleared his throat when his eyes dragged away from you, cheeks a bright red. "What now?"

"Well, we could attempt at trying to swim back—"

"You can't swim."

"I was going to say that."

"Oh, sorry."

There's a soft silence between the both of you as you finish up. Gently redressing, you make your way towards the entrance of the cave, where the waterfall is blocking it from any negative eyes. You press your lips into a thin line and regard it bitterly. You remember this waterfall.... you could recall the times you whimsical pondered what it'd be like to ride down it like in those stories.

Jinshi had promised such when you both were too young and too dumb to realize how naïve dreams like that were.

You couldn't really judge that mini-you, for you had your own dreams of—

"Remember when Gaoshun first brought us here?"

You hadn't realized that Jinshi made his way over until he was standing beside you. Robes lose over his shoulders and tugging on his top layer. Violet eyes were watching the water as if it were a canvas of memories in the long distant past. Something to be admired and viewed with daisies and smiles. Not to be addressed as anything but good or amazing. Not to see the truth of it all.

You press your lips together, drawing in a heavy breath, "I remember you pushing me in the water and Gaoshun having to pull me out."

Jinshi's face screws up slightly, a faint blush on his features as he almost looks around with shame. "Right...." He straightens, "I'm sorry."

You blink, "Huh?"

Jinshi glances at you with a small smile, "I, uh, never really apologized back then. Made you apologize like you did something wrong." He explains weakly.

You raise an amused brow, "I told you I wished you would drown."

"I kinda deserved it!" Jinshi counters, his lips cracking into a grin. That charming grin he gets that makes your heart flutter. Make you hopeful for terrible and wistful. "I'm real sorry."

You smile softly, eyes kind and soft as you regard him, "I forgave you a long time, Jinshi-sama."

Jinshi's expression faltered, "Don't call me...." He trailed off awkwardly, turning his attention back to the unrelenting waterfall. You watched him for that moment. That split second where it looked like he was actually going to say something that would make you lightheaded. His jaw working and the muscle jumping as he seems to contemplate his next words.

Say anything and I'll cling to it, You think, watching his lips part, I always have. I always will.

"I'm surprised you were the one that followed me out. I thought the Apothecary might've done it."

You tense. That was certainly not what you expected him to say. Of all the things he could say? The Apothecary.

The waterfall in front of you is suddenly much too loud and violent. The cave seems to darken and your eyes drag from Jinshi to stare at your bare feet. Of course. Of course. Why wouldn't he want Maomao? Why had you even came here? Who were you to get between whatever silent signal he was trying to send to the other girl.

Him and Maomao. It was nicer than him and you. Jinshi and Y/n.

You straighten, pushing down any ill thoughts and heavy feelings into the dark pits of your chest and mind. "I apologize for the intrusion. I thought it'd make more sense for me to accompany you, Jinshi-sama."

"Why are you apologizing....?" He trailed off and then made a noise that sounded eerily similar to that of a caught man. "No, wait, I'm really glad that you're the one who came! Like really glad!"

"You don't have to spare me, Jinshi-sama. I'm a woman now, not a little girl."

"I'm not—" He visibly slumps, closing his eyes and trying to collect whatever thoughts he has and place them appropriately. He draws in a breath and faces you, looking oddly serious compared to his usual self. "I'm not trying to spare your feelings. I was just trying to say that— Well, it's not— I want you here, Y/n."

He's sparing your feelings. He's being kind. He doesn't actually want you there. You can't be friends.

You don't spare him a response. Instead, walking further into the cave. You raise your eyebrows, looking at the gaping hole above you where light and the sounds of nature filtered in. What could possibly get you both out of there...?

Whistle. Sit.

Of course. Him.

Jinshi sighs, "I spoke to Gaoshun before we—"

You place your fingers in the corner of your mouth and blow. A loud whistle bounces off the cave walls and out of the hole. You wait and hope to hear a bark or see the familiar tall man, but there's nothing.

"What are you doing?" Jinshi asks slowly, glancing between you and the hole above.

"Hello?" You cup your hands over your mouth and shout as loudly as you can. "Is anyone out there?"

Jinshi frowns, staring at you uneasily, "Y/n, please, we don't want to attract them this direction."

In the mess of almost drowning and seeing peeps of Jinshi's bare skin, you'd almost forgotten that you both had been chased down here by some violent assassin. Rather foolish, if you were honest.

You place the tips of your fingers against your lips and try to force the blush spreading across your cheeks off. "Sorry." You offer a bow of your head, despite the position you both find yourselves in.

You receive no response which causes you to peek at him. The stare that he's leveling you with doesn't bring you any type of comfort. It usually meant he was about to say something that—

"Hop on my back and see if you can reach up there."

—you wouldn't like.

Your eyebrows shot upwards and you stared at him with wide eyes. If Suiren was here and knew what he just proposed, she'd positively lose her mind. No matter how long she had known you— she'd think it improper. He was your boss and you were his lowly servant. To be in an position above him or treating him like a mat, it was...

It was simply ridiculous.

"But—"

"If you're the one below, you'll get crushed." He jabs a thumb over his shoulder. "Do it."

And that's how you ended up here. Legs wrapped around Jinshi's shoulders and heads, hand reaching out for the dirt above. You dig your fingers in and glance down at the man below you.

"Are you sure I'm not hurting you?"

Jinshi sighed for what seemed the hundredth time that day, his hand on your thigh squeezing gently. "Y/N, please stop asking me that."

You grimace, "My apologies, Jinshi-sama. Sorry." You shakily raise from your place, ignoring the soft and deep grunt Jinshi gives as you stand on his shoulders.

You dig your nails into the damp dirt and begin to tug yourself up.

This is it. Finally, you could get into the open forest once again. You're not going to be suffocated by his presence. Everything will return back to its rightful places—

You froze when it smacked you in the forehead.

You tried to keep calm as you felt the slimy breathing thing rest on your skin. Body tensed up and eyes staring widely at the bright sky above.

"Y/N?" Jinshi softly called, noticing the way you tensed.

"F—Frog." You utter, jaw clenched tight and you felt it shift as you take a deep breath. "A frog."

Jinshi blinked, looking up at you with his own wide eyes, "Hey, don't-don't freak out! Just shake your head and it'll hop off."

You shake a little, but follow his instructions. However, you may have overestimated the shake as you lose your grip on the dirt and begin to fall back.

"Hey!"

The tumble down is short and not all that hurtful, like you had been expecting. You had closed your eyes in anticipation, fear of having to watch the ground quickly approach too much for your tiny heart. You expected to feel the damp mud to be seeping into your clothes and little bits of stone and bark digging into your skin. However—

Nothing.

There was nothing except the soft silk under your fingers. The scent that resembled a sweet fruit, one that you had smelt quite often in the mornings. In the noons, the evenings, the nights, repeat. You knew that smell and that familiar beat against your own chest.

Peeking your eyes open, you find that Jinshi is already staring back at you. The first thing you notice is that you both are extremely close to one another. His breath fans against your dewy face, making goosebumps raise off your skin and a shiver sent down your spin. Next is his tender expression, Eyes gentle and twinkling. His expression isn't filled with pain or anything that would indicate that he was uncomfortable with the very short distance between you both. The last thing you notice is the fact that your body is pressed against his.

Your complexion flushes and you blink down at him.

He's warm. Incredibly warm. A sharp contrast to his damp clothes, which are open and pooling under his shoulder blades, revealing his bare chest to you. Your breath is ripped from you as you stare at the plump skin. You've seen it a million times. Every day as you help him get ready for the day. It should be normal. Should be something that doesn't make you lightheaded.

But it does.

He's right there. Right against you. You can feel his heartbeat ramming against his chest and into yours. You can feel every small breath he takes—as if hanging onto this moment with, what? Trepidation? Unease? You weren't entirely sure but you knew that you felt light.

Was it so bad that you felt nice in this moment? That this warmth was wrong? Was it so out of your reach that you simply couldn't imagine a man wanting to embrace you in a way?

You are to give your life to your master. Any inappropriate behavior will be punished, severely.

Yes. It was.

You clenched your jaw, ignoring the tender look in Jinshi's eyes as you try to bring your mind into the present.

The frog.

It wasn't anything that you wanted to touch, but Jinshi was your master. Your discomforts and fears must be pushed away for his sake and needs.

Reaching down, you feel for any signs of the frog. It wasn't large, but it wasn't entirely small either. It wouldn't be hard to find in all it's slimy and— There it is.

Your hand brushed it and you feel almost elated to find it. Your hand cupped around the bulge from Jinshi's robes. It feels much bigger than the average frog that'd been on your forehead. It was unmoving to, except for the small twitch it gives as you rest your palm down. You gripped it.

"Hng," Jinshi grunts, his eyes close. You're a little shocked as his hips shift, his hands at your hips dig into your flesh, almost too eager. You snap your eyes upward to his suddenly sweating and flushed face. "I-I'm sorry, but... but could you move your hand? It's making things, um, rather difficult."

Difficult?

You grip onto the twitching frog below you—

"U-Uh—" Jinshi moans in a deep and guttural way that would make anyone, especially you, malfunction. It doesn't help that his hands latch onto you harder, pressing you closer and releasing a stuttering breath against your ear.

Why was he squirming so much? Why was his face so red and dripping with sweat? Why was his chest heaving and his hands flexing around your skin? And why was this thing twitching and getting bigger in your hold....

Oh.

Oh.

You are to give your life to your master. Any inappropriate behavior will be punished, severely.

You felt a little sick at your intrusion. At the gall. You couldn't believe yourself. You had violated one of the single rules you were ever given. You violated Jinshi's space. His entire being. You were to be punished and hated— ousted from your position.

Disgusted with yourself, you slowly stand up. Jinshi's softly panting from his position on the ground, running a hand through his mused hair.

"S-Sorry, I haven't— I'm a bit—" Jinshi's obviously embarassed and uncomfortable. Look what you've done. You've ruined it all. "Hey, where are you going?"

Before you could think much more as his hands grip your hips once again and pull you down.

You're sat on his his lap and you could feel it.

"J-Jinshi-sama, I'm so-I'm so sorry!" You tucked your head down, shaking with trembling lips.

Jinshi's hands fall to your thighs, limp, "Eh...?"

"What I did was truly inappropriate and-and I will take any and all punishment!"

"Punishment...?" He sounded terribly confused, still a bit breathless. You keep your head ducked and he remains unmoved. "Why would I... you're not getting punished."

"I give my life to you. Any inappropriate behavior will be punished." You repeated softly under your breath, tucking your hands against your face to hide away from his gaze. From the judgement and hatred. "It's only just."

There's a longstanding silence between the both of you and you're hopeful that he's coming to his senses. That you'd be released and freed. That you would finally accept the gap and space between them. To fall away, finally, to the shadows.

It was tarnished the moment Jinshi wraps your hands around your own, gently prying your hands away from your face.

He doesn't look vengeful or angered. No. No, he looks kind. As he always has been. Kind and considerate. Honest and open. He'd always been so...

He'd never really been angry with you. Not without sadness being overbearing. Always so quick to forgive you. To push everything away with a smile and crinkle of his eyes.

"Y/N..." His words are as soft as his expression.

Your hands shake, "Please... Please hate me." You pleaded quietly, pressing your forehead against his hands as if he were a monk to be begged to.

"I'm not going to punish you or... or anything of the sort. Why would you want that?"

You draw in a watery breath, shoulders shaking, "It's easier to let go that way." You admitted.

"Let go of what?"

"Of my love for you."

"What?!"

His shout echoed off the cave walls. Your humiliation and embarrassment was quick to follow once it bounced back at you. Made you flinch back and try to push yourself back from his lap. Why did you say anything? Fool. Disgusting fool.

"Hey, hey, hey," Jinshi's hands wrap around your wrists and tug you forward a bit. You refuse to meet his eye. You refuse to be humiliated and demeaned— "Don't do that. Don't close off."

You clench your jaw and try to push the humilation deep within you, taking a deep calming breath as you stared at his bare collar. "You're so kind and so... you. I'm sorry if I make you uncomfortable or disgusted, but I need to tell you. And then I would hope that you would let me go."

Jinshi's eyebrows shot up. "Let you go?"

You've been thinking about this for some time. That it all would be better if, in the end, you were to serve someone else. That you were pawned off for some soldier instead of this slow torture. This uncomfortable, unbearable tiptoeing.

"I would like for you to offer me to a soldier or anywhere else."

The reaction is instant. The way Jinshi's complexion darkens and he stares at you with wide eyes. He slumps into the damp ground and almost turns into putty. His hold on you slackens and gives you ample opportunity to move away. But you're frozen in your spot.

"Why would I do that?" Jinshi's voice is quiet, slow, "You're... You're mine."

A blush takes over your cheeks, "Jinshi-sama, It's not appropriate! I shouldn't be like this with you."

"What if I like it?"

You blink at him. "Huh?"

Jinshi leans forward, his thumb gently skirting against your skin. "What if I have some love for you too? What if I don't care about what's appropriate or follows the rules."

I would ask who you are. You were tempted to say but your mouth was clamped shut in shock. Following the rules had been completely him. He was put in his current position now to ensure the rules in the rear palace were being followed diligently. The thought that he would love someone like you when there were people like Maomao or princesses out there. People much more deserving of his devotion. It wasn't right.

As if sensing you're not believing him, he pulls away and presses his lips thin. "Okay, I'll convince you." He straightens up and takes a breath. "I spoke to Gaoshun not too long ago. Before we came here and I know everything now."

A pause. Everything. He knew everything now? Everything is so much. Everything is... well, everything. What exactly had Gaoshun told him?

"What's everything?"

"That my mother didn't want you around anymore. That Gaoshun told you that you weren't allowed around me anymore. That you stopped being my friend and became my employee."

Your stare up at Jinshi with wide eyes. "That's not...Us being friends wasn't right anymore."

Jinshi frowned, shaking his head and his hands slide up to your arms. "If I had my way, I would've had you by my side all that time. Not as some lady-in-waiting, but as my equal."

You shake your head, ignoring the erratic beating of your heart against your chest. "Don't say that. Don't say things you don't mean, Jinshi." You beg softly.

Jinshi reaches out, wrapping his hands around your own, pressing it against his chest. "I mean it with everything in me. If it were up to me, I wouldn't have ever been separated from you. Forget what my mother said." His words were sweet, tempting. They made you lightheaded. So did the sudden brightness and tender smile on his face. "That's the first time you've called me Jinshi since we were kids."

"What? I've always called you Jinshi."

"No, you've always called me Jinshi-sama."

"Oh."

You suppose you had.

"Jinshi," You utter, unsure of what else you both could say.

Jinshi's expression, if possible, softens further, leaning forward an inch. "Yes?" He whispers back just as softly.

Your eyes trail between his eyes before moving to his lips, parted and glistening, "Jinshi..."

Jinshi's hand slides up your thigh and his lips are ghosting against yours, "I'm here. I promise." He whispers before pressing your lips together delicately.

Your heart soars. Your hands shakily press against his cheeks, drawing closer as his own press your hips together. He's soft. He's tender. He's cautious and all encompassing. Filling your senses and making you lightheaded.

As you both part for a breath, he flips you onto your back. His hand grips the underside of your thigh and presses you close enough that he lets out a soft and broken sound.

His eyes are heavily lidded as he gazes down at you, lips pink. "I just want you. No one else. I promise." He utters.

You twist your hands into his hair, eyes fluttering. "You're it." You pass back.

His lips are back on yours. Wet and eager. This is sudden. Fast. But you've been waiting for so long. Had been clinging onto the smallest of things. Desperate to have this closeness that you had now. To feel his skin against yours. His breath mixing with your own. Everything him and everything you intertwined.

You just wanted to cherish this—

WOOF!

You and Jinshi both tense up, jumping. Looking over his shoulder, your eyes widen upon finding a familiar dog staring down at you both, wagging tail eager and happy to see you.

Jinshi's eyebrows furrow, "Huh...?"

There's not much warning before the dog is jumping down. Landing straight on Jinshi's back, causing the poor man to let out a pained sound. He's squishing you against the ground as the dog stands on his back, happily lapping his tongue against your cheek.

Vague disgust and disappointment wash over you, but you smile all the same. "Oh, boy!"

He barks again. A greeting you're sure.

Above, Lihaku and, surprisingly, Maomao appear. Both of them stare down at you with varying degrees of emotions. Lihaku looked excited and kinda like his dog, while Maomao.

Well, Maomao looked all too knowing.

"Well, you look rough!" Lihaku called down with a grin, "Glad to see you're not dead."

"As am I!" You huff out a laugh, then look to Maomao. "Hello, Xiaomao!"

"Hello." Maomao said flatly, she looked lower and her face screwed up distastefully. "Is Jinshi-sama okay?"

Lihaku then he spots his dog and slightly pales, letting out a sharp whistle. "C'mon, boy!"

The dog eagerly jumps off Jinshi, going to sit by your head and wag his tail. The man above you sighs in relief, pushing up off you. He sits up and you try not to focus on the bright blush on his face.

"Why did he do that?" The royal asks.

"Must've thought something was wrong." Lihaku rubs the back of his neck, frowning down at you both. "What... exactly where you two doing?"

You and Jinshi glance at one another, furious blushes flushing over you both. Despite anything that Jinshi said, there were things that you weren't allowed to do. Rules and laws that forbid something like this form happening the public eye. For a man like himself from being with a woman like you. A servant with a beautiful prince.

Protecting him was the priority.

"Nothing!" You shout back, ignoring the eyebrow raise that garnered from both Jinshi and Maomao.

Everything was better left alone. A secret between the both of you. To cherish and hold for however long it may need. You could deal with the anger and longing later.

[stormystarlight]

everybody give itup for the slug #myslug

experimental painting from my backlog, number 3 out of 3. so that's all for now! i painted this one after a few days of playing the watcher (because i got excited about Slug), which meant there was a decent half-month gap between it and the last one.

i think i did a lot better with my use of halftones & the rake this time. they stand out way more which is what i wanted!

when i started this piece i envisioned it with a dark/almost black background, but when i got to the actual painting phase it made me realize how much i like the Vibrant Underpainting That Influences The Whole Color Palette thing. switching out the background immediately made me like it way more, but next time i want to practice keeping the underpainting beneath the Character Only so i can get the look i want while still having a dark background.

in the first 2 paintings i added a texture overlay on top of the whole thing and it made them look pretty good. i forgiot it on this one. i miss my texture overlay, tails. i miss it a lot. i know i could just go back and add it now but im not doing that

idk how many people read them, but i've been enjoying writing these progress/thought process summaries under these posts. they're specifically applicable to this 'experimental painting' series because i don't know what the hell i'm doing, but i might add them to more 'normal' posts going forward just because i can

[k4lenz]

i loved you first ✮ chapter 1 - “that’s just the way life goes”

(ted nivison x fem!reader)

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

a/n: i’ve been listening to the song 'i love you, i'm sorry' on repeat, and something hit me really hard about it. so i decided to write an angst fic very much loosely based on the lyrics! childhood best friend!ted that you used to do everything with. i was crashing out hard while writing this, can you tell?? anyway enjoy chapter 1 ahhhhh ALSO I KNOW THIS IS ANGST I SWEAR CHAPTER 2 ITLL GET BETTER IM SORRY but also chapter 2 is gonna be more of this song coded oops. idk if i love this but i hope u guys do :)

playlist: click right here bb

notes: angst, fluff, dating, growing up together, YEARNING, underage drinking, dating, drugs, coming of age, highschool, university, that damn Toyota Tacoma, lunch club + SMPlive mentions, parents mentioned

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

2008. Your parents moved into his hometown in Massachusetts when you were just shy of 10, and became friends with his parents who lived just a few streets away. You shyly greeted him for the first time, and you two just clicked.

You were inseparable from then on, and your parents were so thankful they sent you to the same primary school. And then it continued into middle school, and even highschool. Attached at the hip.

For his 16th birthday, 2014, you bought Ted a polaroid camera. Shabby money you’d gathered up from chores around the house and a job at a cafe. Nonetheless, it still got you the gift. You’d bought him an album for the pictures too, you both signed the back of it. From then on, it was his favourite gift he’d ever gotten. Even if you told him he didn’t have to say that, you’d sparked an interest of photography in him from the beginning.

People, especially your friends, were always suspicious you two were dating. Rather, you’d both always wave it off with a “gross!” and a laugh.

Despite the lingering touches, on your waist, a hand around your shoulders, a jab in your side, a squeeze in your hand, your hand in his hair.

You two were just friends.

✮

Halfway through the winter, the ground icy and snow piling. January 17th, 2015. He was freshly 17, slowly growing out of his boyish features with his very own 2002 Green Toyota Tacoma and a proper license. So proud of himself.

He’d not come to school on the day because he’d had his test (and he hadn’t wanted to waste his birthday-day doing it the day before).

4pm sharp he was out the front of your house, beeping the horn of his newly owned car and a that big childish grin on his face. The look on his face was familiar to you, like home, recognisable throughout the years and never changing.

You ran out the front door giggling, tripping over your own feet in excitement as he got out of his car and came around to open the passenger side door for you. Giving you a little poke before getting back in the car.

“Y’like it?” “I’ll like it more when you drive me to school every morning! “If I have to.” He’d sigh, albeit exaggerated, but secretly his heart would warm. He’d made you take a picture of him with the car, too. And he’d snuck one of you with it when you weren’t looking.

The winter weather slowly faded, preparing itself for the blossoming flowers of Spring.

Valentine’s Day, 2015. He was beeping again out the front of your house, to your parents usual annoyance and a disturbance to your neighbourhood.

But to give him credit, you’d told him to pick you up 5pm because you’d asked him for more time to get ready. And it was 5:05pm.

You came out of your front door with the biggest smile on your face, cheeks tinged pink, tucking your hair behind your ear, as he stood there with one hand behind his back and the other holding the passenger door open for you.

“What’cha got there, Teddy?” You teased, as he handed you the bouquet of roses, proclaiming they were platonic and watching you giggle.

“Thankyou. They’re beautiful.”

You’re beautiful. is what he wanted to say. And they’re not platonic. And I love you and I always have, since the minute I laid eyes on you.

But instead he grabbed his polaroid camera once you’d sat down in the passenger seat, wanting to snap a picture of you holding the flowers. He used the camera to hide the blush on his cheeks.

Click. He was just saying it in his own way.

You two drove down to the lake, sitting in his car eating snacks you’d bought on the way there and laughing about everything and nothing. Just you two against the world.

His eyes glanced at your lips, and then met your eyes again. Your eyes stared through his soul, your lips found his as if that was all they were ever made to do. The night ended in soft whispers, giggles, his hands on your waist and your arms around his neck, lips interlocked as if they could never part again. as if you were each others air.

Quiet promises of relationships. You two never announced it, but you didn’t ever need to, you came into school holding hands and nobody batted an eye. Like it was bound to happen. As if everybody but you two knew and kept the secret to themselves, waiting for you to finally figure it out.

✮

Many nights were spent sneaking into each other’s houses, into each other’s beds, holding each other close. Beds warm with each other, he typically preferred sneaking into your house. Your sheets warmer, fluffier. More you.

You studied together, stayed together, and worked hard for your final moments of highschool.

You couldn’t have done it without him, and he couldn’t have done it without you.

May, or April, 2016. Prom night. You couldn’t quite remember. The memories got fuzzier as time passed, you’d admit. He waited downstairs, talking to your parents in his best suit and tie, the colour matching your own dress as you finally came down the stairs. He was speechless, his eyes simply absorbing you. He had to make sure the flowers in his hand didn’t drop as he handed them to you and your hand found his chest.

“You okay there, Teddy?” You laughed fondly, eyes glittering and amused.

“You’re the most stunning thing I’ve seen in my entire life.” He’d reply, entranced. Your parents shared a look, raising eyebrows to each other knowing he was the right one for you.

Most of your night spent on the dance floor, twirls and dips and laughter. Your friends altogether, but to him it felt like you were the only person in the room, when he dipped you and kissed you to his favourite song. Your friends gagging playfully, saying you two were straight out of a Disney movie.

The night held a party after with everyone in your year, at some guy’s house you hardly remember. The taste of alcohol on your lips, and Ted’s, you recalled. Snapping drunk Polaroid pictures and singing (screaming) the most popular music like you’d never hear it again.

June 16th, 2016. You wore your graduation caps and robes. He picked you up at 9am, the ceremony started at 11.

He knocked on the door, hair styled, glasses on, robes on, and his graduate cap. Greeting your parents with warm smiles, hugs, and congratulations at your front door as you told them you’d go with Ted and meet them there. It felt like home. He felt like home.

Your parents snapping a picture of you two walking down the driveway hand in hand and sending it to his parents. That picture was your lock screen on your phone for a good long while.

That same stupid damn truck waiting for you in the driveway.

“You look incredible.” He murmured in your ear, voice as sweet as honey, pulling you in for a kiss as soon as he’d opened the door for you to get in the car. You were sure your parents were still watching, but you kissed him back anyway. “You’re not too bad yourself, handsome.”

You sat at the spot near the lake in the car again, for that extra hour you had. You weren’t too heavy hearted, not at all, because you’d both gotten accepted into Ithaca College in New York. Even though everything would be changing, you would have everything changing together. You’d even found a sweet little apartment together, close by to campus. You’d gotten a job at a café down the road, and he was doing editing on YouTube.

You were reminiscing on your best memories of Massachusetts. Of how you met. Of school.

You two against the world.

You and your family cheered loud when your boyfriend got up on the podium and accepted his certificate, your parents sitting right next to his, and you still waiting in line.

His eyes first found his parents, your parents, and then you.

It was always you.

Him and his family cheered loud when you got your own certificate. He was already lined up with the rest of the fellow graduates, holding up his certificate. But he was simply entranced by your wide smile and laughter.

Your eyes first found your parents, his parents, and then him.

It was always him.

Always each other.

You went to a party, laughing getting drunk with your friends. Celebrating what you’d call freedom. Hand in hand. You’d stumbled back into his house, which was now allowed according to your parents and his, because you were both 18.

The next day you were hungover, eyes dreary and heavy with a bit too much alcohol. Regret, pancakes, and those prized hours of sleep.

The day after you were ready. That dumb Toyota Tacoma once again sitting in your driveway at around Midday. Ready for you two to make the trip to Ithaca. The sweltering heat of the start of summer coming down on you two in heavy rays.

Loading your boxes into the car, your parents and his parents chatting in your house. Playfully nudging him while you two walked down the driveway, he gasped.

“Oh, so you want me to drop your precious valuables?”

“No!” You’d squeal, as he set another box down in his boot and lift you up to spin you around. The joy in the air undeniable. Independence and your very own space to yourselves, together.

Everything together. Not a statement, but a promise.

Soft goodbyes to parents, long hugs and promises to call, tears pairing with the new feeling of independence. You felt upset, but also happy. Happy you had set life plans, that you’d graduated and now knew what you were doing, alongside the love of your life.

Ted would always be the love of your life. You were so sure of it at the time.

Endless chatter filled the car as you two drove to Ithaca. He’d insisted on driving, teasing you that you’d crash his car when you’d told him to take a break and let you drive. A few pit stops and many cans is sods and bags of chips later, you were in Ithaca and loading your boxes into your dorm.

Sharing looks at the state of said dorm, but embracing it as your new home anyway. You’d make it your own.

✮

College was hard, but you made time. You were both doing your degrees that went for the same length, and yet you still found time for each other. You always would.

It wasn’t hard to find friends, and considering you and Ted were always attached, you fit in well to a friend group together. Days had studies or work, smoking weed and drinking and parties were what weekend nights held. Kisses and shotgunning, and so much more. Your parents would kill you and his parents would kill him if they knew, but hey, that’s the fun of college.

You watched him start off his YouTube career properly in 2017, as a part time kind of thing. You encouraged him, even, sometimes appearing in the back of his videos. In 2019, sometimes you’d be in a Lunch Club video or two, simply as ‘Ted’s Cool Girlfriend’, and you’d play on his account on SMPLive. You met all of his other friends, and familiarised yourself in his world as the end of your degrees neared.

And yes, you were the girlfriend, with your dad in town, that he had to cancel on when he went to a misfits party during the day, because he did indeed have a 400mg edible. His friends continuously sending you videos of him stuck on the couch, questioning his entire life choices, chugging water for his cottonmouth. Shaking, while narrating the whole situation like it was a storybook. Trying to tough it out. You still have the video on your phone of Schlatt putting a handheld massager on your boyfriend who looks half dead. You’d also made his friends use that old Polaroid camera to take a picture, knowing he’d want to look back at it and laugh.

You’d lied through your teeth to your dad, still laughing at the videos, which hadn’t helped anyway because about a month later Ted posted a video on it anyway. He most definitely got reprimanded by his parents and your own.

✮

As the end of college edged closer, nights were spent studying, or in the library together. Comfortable silences, with the occasional jab or joke. It was all so perfect.

And yet, it almost felt like for once in the last 12 years, you two were living separate lives. Not simply attached at the hip anymore, you two were so different.

You were close, always, but something felt off.

✮

Before you two had began college together, you’d sat in the back of his Toyota Tacoma down at the lake, laying on pillows wrapped up in blankets staring at the stars. A few weeks before highschool graduation.

“We should travel the world together, Teddy. Go see everything amazing out there. You could make a short film of it, or something. Travels with Ted.”

His eyes lit up, the prospect of it making him yearn for the future.

“That’s a stupid name.” He teased. “But I like that.”

You giggled, playfully hitting his chest. “I’m being serious!”

“As am I, that’s a stupid name. And I want to travel with you.” His lips found yours, he kissed you softly, carefully. To show he meant it. “We can start saving.”

✮

And you did start saving, you both were still saving.

And yet you hadn’t talked about it since at least 2018, hadn’t had time to even think about it. Far too busy with the whirlwinds of the world of New York City and College.

You sat on the couch, May 3rd 2020, exactly one month before your graduation.

He sat on the floor while you sat on the couch, his head between your legs facing away while you two watched a movie. His hands on your legs, your hands in his hair. But something felt distant, you felt distant.

You were lost in your thoughts, anxiety creeping up in your gut. Crawling through your body, seeping into your head. You watched his head move to look back at you, and you blinked.

“Are you okay, honey?” He murmured, those big brown eyes finding yours, his voice soothing but ringing through your ears.

“Yeah. Yeah. I’m good. Why?” You managed to stammer out, tone laced with nervousness. You were never good at lying.

“I said somethin’ about the movie and you didn’t reply.” His eyes narrowed, concerned. It was then he noticed your laboured breath, and the rhythmic tapping of your foot against the floor beside him. He reached for the remote to pause the film, and sat beside you on the couch. His hand finding yours, and his shoulder touching yours.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” The words made your throat feel heavy, your lips parting to speak but nothing coming out. “You look like you’ve got something on your mind.”

I do. The thought rattled in your brain, as you built the courage to speak.

“I do.” You could hear that your own voice was shaky. You swallowed hard. “I was just, thinking.. um..”

“That’s rare.” He teased quietly, holding your hand. You laughed quietly, shaking your head.

His joke brought just that little bit of relief, if only for a brief moment. You found your voice.

“I was thinking about our future.” You paused for a moment.

“I was thinking about us.”

You saw his eyes process the statement that was more of a question, with a blink. A thousand unspoken words on his tongue, and your own too.

Are you still coming with me? Is what you were asking. Are we still going to travel together like we always said we would?

He hesitated, and you knew. A little part of you just knew.

“Everything is going really well for me, here.” He almost sounded shameful. His eyes unable to find yours, you knew they were filled with guilt and empty promises.

You hesitated, this time.

“I don’t want to stay.” You were breathless as the words tumbled out of your mouth.

And at that moment, for the first time, you felt worlds apart. His hand on yours felt distant, nothing else in the room but just.. you. You and your own thoughts.

The words had triggered an argument, tears, a fight or flight response. You slept at your friends dorm that night, yet you’d hardly slept at all.

You came back to open arms the next morning, whispered apologies, flowers and pancakes. And the salty taste of tears.

But it felt over. A certain sinking feeling in your gut, eating you up. You knew he felt it too.

Your greatest fear was right there in front of you. Making your hands shake and your knees weak. You and your other half.

You two were finally growing apart.

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

[ennkis]

VROOM (harry lewis x reader)

summary : in which y/n and harry get invited to go to the silverstone formula one grand prix (2023)

face claim : no one exact

notes : im an absolute noob at writing fics so please excuse the quality lmao. im petrified of posting on here but ive been thinking about starting a blog for over a year. im open to feedback, opinions and any sort of questions/advice is welcome! i happen to waffle a lot so just skip those parts if uninterested. this is my first post so enjoy 😝 also pls request because i have the creativity of a koala so id appreciate some ideas :D

pairings : harry lewis x reader , lando norris x platonic!reader

"WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?! Are you actually serious?" You asked your boyfriend in genuine shock, followed by a laugh from the man dressed in head to toe in Ferrari merch. The red and yellow colors clashed hilariously with the sleek, orange McLaren paddock pass hanging around his neck.

"What? I thought I'd support the winning team." He shrugged, a cheeky grin spreading across his face. You and Harry got invited by the Mclaren F1 team to watch the Silverstone Grand Prix from the paddock. As a Formula 1 fan youself, you were excited to see the cars upclose. To watch the mechanics to the pitstops, engineers do their things (idk what they do lmao) and to watch Max Verstappen overlap the whole grid like seven times. Even since you were a little kid you were amazed by those cars driving freakishly quickly. Now, several years later you get to experience it right infront of your eyes.

"Look, there's Lando!" Harry pointed out, spotting your friend talking to a group of mechanics. You approached Lando, who broke into a wide grin as he saw you. "Hey! There are my favorite YouTubers!"

You beamed. "Lando! It's so good to see you. How's it going?"

"It's been wild but amazing," Lando replied, glancing at Harry. "And I see you've managed to get Harry in the right gear this time."

Harry laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, I had a little help with that."

Lando gave you two a playful nudge. "So, who are you rooting for today? Besides me, of course."

You laughed. "Well, McLaren, obviously. But I'm also excited to see how the Brits perform. It's going to be an interesting race."

"That's the spirit," Lando said, his eyes twinkling with excitement. "Alright, I better get back to my team, but I'll see you guys later? Enjoy the race!"

You and Harry found a spot in the back of Landos garage, it had a view on the screens but also the pit-stop. The whole race went by fast. The moment the lights went out Lando tried his hardest with a deserved P2 at his home race.

Liked by mclaren, f1 & 1,002,485 others.

yourusename mom, i got invited to the silverstone grand prix.. still lowkey in disbelief like wtf.. me?? anyways, tysm mclaren 🩷 enjoy my lovely film camera dump raaaah.

View all 2,547 comments.

user harry looking fine as always😍

user y/n and lando finest friends

wroetoshaw whos the first fella hes fit

- yourusername he has a girlfriend..

user i can imagine y/n just walking around taking pictures of everything and everyone 😭😭😭

user i almost melted when they came on the screen

- user me too 😭 forgot i was watching f1 for a second

wroetoshaw i still think i shouldve worn my ferrari outfit #hater

- yourusername youd be sticking out like a sore thumb youre lucky i stopped you #loser #youalmostworepajamapants

user y/n looked so good there 😍

user i LIVE for y/n and landos friendship

faithlouisak i cant believe you chose him over me..

- yourusername im sorry bae.. next time im taking u

faithlouisak finest woman out there

calfreezy wtf fake friends.. theburntchip are you seeing what im seeing ???

- theburntchip bunch of fakies😔

holy what a yap fest lmfao please someone REQUEST something 😭 cause this is too plain.. !

[fictoweirdoesten]

Only Just a Dream

cw: gn! reader x lads men (poly). use of petnames (pipsqueak, pips, sweetie, kitten, 'darling light', cutie). dialogue by color (because I'm not confident that y'all will understand who's talking because my writing skills suck). mostly fluff but hard-hitting angst(reader has depression)towards the end, and then slight fluff right at the end.

a/n: let me know if the color dialogue is too distracting, I'll change it back. wanted to write this to forget about my ex-bsf for at least 30 minutes because heh, bpd, can't stop thinking about them.

update: bpd is so funn that I don't miss them anymore and instead completely hate them<3

idk i just wish i had the lads guys as friends maaaaaaaaan im really going through it rn uhhhh hope you enjoy reading ♡

"Cuuutie! Wake uuuuup!"

You groan, clutching onto your pillow as you try to ignore the person waking you up.

"Pleaaaase? You've been asleep aaaall day!"

The person tugs at your arm before gripping on it, attempting to pull you out of the bed. It's not until a few tugs later that you fully register what's going on. Your eyes suddenly widen, darting to the man beside you. Your heart races when you take in his appearance, the way his pretty blue and pink eyes stare down at you with a mix of confusion and admiration. He eases his grip on your arm, leaning closer to you with a slight smirk on his face.

"What? Had a nightmare?" he teases, but there's a hint of genuine concern in his voice. He moves his hand to your cheek, carressing it gently. "Don't worry. Your very strong boyfriend is here to protect you."

He chuckles, but you don't. "I can't believe it," you think to yourself, eyes darting all over the Lemurian. "Is he...? Am I...?"

"That big dummy is making breakfast." Your heart beats at his words, already guessing who this 'big dummy' could be. Rafayel notices your sudden excitement and lets out a scoff, shrugging his shoulders. "I knew your back was big, but man, didn't know you'd get that excited over-"

Before he could finish, you're already out of the ridiculously-large bed and pacing down the hallway. You stop, almost turning into a puddle of goo right there as your eyes spot two men in the kitchen. One of them is wearing nothing but a frilly red apron and some gray sweatpants, his attention on the stove as he holds the pan with one hand and a spatula on the other. The other is holding a cup of coffee, his hazel eyes slowly glancing up from his phone to you as he takes another sip.

"...Well good morning," Zayne gently smiles, setting his mug down and resting his chin on his hand. "You slept long enough. We were starting to get worried yknow." Caleb quickly moved his gaze to you when he heard Zayne, a lovestruck grin on his face. "If you keep sleeping in like that, I might have to start breathing down your neck every night until you fall asleep at an appropriate time, pipsqueak."

Before you could respond, Zayne interrupts you with a slight chuckle. "Your 'pipsqueak' has been mentally exhausted lately, Caleb. I'll jump in if it becomes an issue." Caleb lets out a quiet "hmph", focusing his attention back at the stove. "I'm almost done with breakfast. Pancakes for Sylus and Zayne, waffles for Rafayel and Xavier, and french toast for you and me."

Sylus? Xavier?

Caleb winks at you, giggling at the flustered look on your face. "What's wrong pips? Looks like you're spacin' out." You let out a slight, almost forced laugh, eyes glancing around the room for Sylus and Xavier, but you don't notice them. You also don't notice Rafayel walking past you, letting out a whine as he leans his head against Caleb's back, rubbing his forehead against his apron.

"When's breakfast ready? I'm hungryyyyyy!"

"Soon, you bratty fish! Now-"

You quickly tune them out, still trying to figure out the whereabouts of the last two men. Zayne notices, letting out a fake cough to catch your attention.

"Suprisingly, those two woke up earlier than you today. Since it's a bit cloudy out, Sylus wanted to go walk, and Xavier went to join him."

"If I'm right, they should be here about now-"

As soon as the words leaves Zayne's lips, the sound of the door unlocking catches your attention. You start walking towards the front door, watching as the two men walk inside and instantly meet your gaze.

"Kitten? I thought you were busy hibernating today," Sylus smirks, leaning down to kiss your forehead, his hand resting on your shoulder momentarily before he lets go, walking past you as he takes off his jacket. Xavier decides to lean his head onto your shoulder, letting out a satisfied hum as he nuzzles against you. "How was the walk Xavier," you ask, your hand moving to his hair, fingers dancing along his scalp. "Mh. It was okay-"

"Not fair! Why didn't I get a pet today!" You glance behind you to see a pissed off Rafayel darting towards the both of you. He flicks at Xavier's forehead, causing the man to groan and stare daggers into him. The both of them are pouting now, and you can't help but giggle as you move and rub your fingers gently against Rafayel's temple. Rafayel lets out a sound similar to a purr, leaning against your touch as he grabs your hand and rubs against your palm.

"Hey! I want a pet too!" You hear Caleb shout from the kitchen, his voice playful, but there's a needy undertone to it that you almost miss. Sylus and Zayne let out a sigh as they sit across from each other at the dining table, shaking their heads like disappointed, but doting parents.

"What are we going to do with them, Zay?"

"I don't know, but I would like it if you wouldn't steal my coffee, Sylus."

Sylus's smirk becomes devious as he glares at Zayne, his hand stopping at the mug's handle. He eventually lets go after a brief staring contest between them, sitting back in his chair as he shrugs and glances away.

"...Your coffee is too sweet for me anyway."

You can't help but let out a fit of laughter at everything that's going on. You haven't felt this happy in a long time. It feels so good to laugh, you suddenly remember.

"Wooow, someone remembered how to be happy, guys."

"My darling light, what's got you so giggly this morning?"

"I've almost missed that laugh of yours, you know."

"Looks like this kitten realized just how loved it is."

"Hey, my sweet baby apple, breakfast is-!"

Your eyes snap open. You glance around, dread slowly creeping in once you realize that you're back in your bed again. That it really was a dream. That you won't ever have that clingy somebody waking you up in the morning, that you won't be greeted with breakfast and a smile, that you won't ever feel as loved as you were in that dream.

And then your phone buzzes. It isn't anyone, you already know, but you can't help but hope anyway. Hope that maybe someone does care.

Love&deepspace:

Rafayel: Cuuuutie! Where are you??? I'm bored in this dumb studio, come say hello!

Xavier: I'm sleepy....let's cuddle together...

Zayne: When I'm done with work today, do you want to hang out? I'm in the mood for sweets.

Sylus: In the mood to shop sweetie? I'll come visit you this evening, be ready.

Caleb: I've made breakfast for you, so come over, okay?

...maybe...maybe you really are loved, after all.

[starbunii]

I'm not sure if you're still doing requests, so if you aren't please just ignore this 😓

If you are tho, could I request Venti, Wanderer, Feminet, and Lyney (idk your character limit so if that's too many please just get rid of whichever you want) with a reader who hates PDA. Not like the reader necessarily minds others doing it, they just don't like being a part of it. Maybe reader had a past relationship where their partner took it too far all the time and made them uncomfortable frequently so reader kind of shuts down when one of the characters try it.

(I really love your wrighting btw! Not even exaggerating, you're my number 1 favorite author! I've never requested anything so I'm sorry if I did this wrong or rudely!)

- <3

# . public display of annoyance 𓂃 ♥︎

𝜗𝜚 ┈ venti, wanderer, freminet, lyney x reader (seperate) ! ｡

notes: honestly i really do love this request!! i can kind of relate to it, since i kind of hate being touched lol. also im super excited to be writing for fremi for the first time; i really do love him a lot!! thank you for being so sweet anon <3

headcanons ノ fluffノgn! reader ノcanon universe

second person pov !! please enjoy! ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶

– ♡ –

venti

as usual, this man is 75% pout. he just wants to hold you and kiss you and pinch your wittle cheeks!!!!

when you don't respond, he's incredibly confused. that confusion turns into concern once he sees your face

he's immediately whisking you somewhere a bit more hidden, making sure you're all right. Safe to say, he won't try any PDA for a while; not until you're comfortable, at least

wanderer

Honestly, I'm not even sure he would really partake in PDA. I think he would have to be in the mood for it; which he rarely is

However, I don't think he would try to do anything without asking first. He's weird about touch too

He'd try to hold your hand, before quickly pulling away out of sheer awkwardness. He'd offer you a small chuckle and a tiny smile, before continuing to walk by your side

freminet

He wants to hold you and kiss you all over and squeeze you until you pop, but in front of people...? no. he's far too reserved for that

Essentially, he's not too fond of PDA either. He's not used to being touched aside from the occasional pat on the shoulder; and even that's just used in a professional context

He'd attempt to hold you more in private, but even that would take him a minute to get used to. he's more adjusted to being close with/observing otters and fish... you are very clearly not an otter or a fish..

lyney

unlike his brother, lyney is all over you all the time. yes, even in public

of course, he tones it down once he realizes it's not exactly your cup of tea, but it does not stop him from bragging about you every chance he gets. he doesn't have to be holding you to show you off

you're still his show stopper regardless. he'll love up on you in private, and then very loudly brag about you to anyone who dares to have ears

starbunii 2024 — all rights reserved. do not redistribute or translate to any other platforms

[xzinbdg]

oh dad? idk

synopsis: yn as a single mother never really wanted to look for the father it was just a one time thing at a party and she was doing alright by herself but ever since her daughter turned four she started asking questions that even she doesn't know the answer to.

as soon as you texted sunghoon your next step had to be telling haru what's going to happen. the only problem was that you weren't sure how to approach the situation. haru was a smart little girl but that didn't change the fact that she was only 4 years old. would she understand what you're trying to say? well no matter what you still had to tell her. you made your way to the living room where your daughter watched the tv.

- hi baby

- hi mommy - the little girl smiled upon seeing you

- there's something mommy has to tell you so please focus on mommy okay? - haru nodded and shifted her attention towards you.

- there's someone very special that you will meet today, it's your daddy - haru's smile grew as she listened to your words

- daddy? - she said happily.

- yes, so let's start getting ready okay? - you said smiling and in a minute the little girl was already running to her room to pick the prettiest outfit.

to say that sunghoon was nervous was an understatement. as he started getting ready his mind went blank for a minute. what if she doesn't like me? what if she cried because I wasn't there for her when she was growing up? then his mind went even further "what if im a bad dad?" he quickly tried to get rid of those thoughts and finish getting ready.

as your car reached the parking lot your heart started speeding up.

- mommy are we here?

- yes honey - you couldn't help but smile at your excited daughter.

sunghoon was already waiting at a table for you two. nervous as ever looking at all the people coming in hoping to see your face quickly. and finally he sees you and the little girl holding your hand looking around. he got up and waved to you. seeing him you signal your daughter that it's her father, and their eyes meet. sunghoon doesn't even realize that he's crying until you ask him what's wrong.

- ah it's alright, i guess the emotions kinda got to me - he says wiping his tears and crouching down to the little girl now hiding behind you because of shyness.

- hello haru - sunghoon says - i'm your daddy - he sends her a smile and she smiles back.

- hi daddy - she looks up to you and you signal her to hug her dad which she excitingly does and sunghoon hugs her back immediately. the three of you enjoyed nice dinner with your daughter asking sunghoon a ton of questions that he was more then happy to answer.

- should we go get some ice cream? of course if your mom says yes - both of them looking at you in anticipation.

- let's go - you smiled.

you have to admit that the sight in front of you was something you had secret dreams about. it's not like you had troubles with haru by yourself but seeing her with her dad was a happy sight. and you're glad that she likes him which did kind of surprise you. haru was always very shy in front of strangers and it took a long time for her to open up but with sunghoon she was very open from the start. maybe it's because he's her dad?

chapter 10 - hello

previous ☆ next ☆ masterlist

author's note: they met 🥹 ngl i kinda felt emotional writing this... 😭💕 yns last tweet 👀

genre: smau, crack, strangers to lovers, parents au

pairing: sunghoon x mother!reader

taglist: @softiehee @beomgyusonlywife @cha3w0n-hearts @mixtape-racha @viagumi @electrobutterfly @alwayswook @smg-valeria @enharts @fantastichoagieuniversityhairdo @lhsvibez @they2luv1naia @oopshee @cyberstephzz @oshakyao @enhaz1 @papichulomacy @tobiosbbyghorl @ikeusimp @msauthor @heeheesang @hyunjinheartbreakprince @mnxnii @junnysbae @enhacolor @soobieboobiedoobiedaboobie @danielleism @d-dilemma @dummyf @missychief1404 @sumzysworld @randomanothercreature @jung1w0n @nujeskz @moonshoon @seunghancore @nshmrarki @whateverhoon

[481mclarg]

Hello! You're the first MotoGP writer that I've seen so I'm super excited to be requesting this.

How do you feel about Marc Marquez x fellow championship winner!male!reader who's also Rossi's protégé? The two have near polar opposite approaches to just about everything, Marc being, well, Marc: aggressive on track, playful, energetic etc.; and reader being such a clean and precise pilot that it genuinely throws people off, quieter, more prickly and avoids the press like it's the plague (and when the press do get ahold of him, he acts like he has said plague). Everyone was shocked when the two got together due to a variety of factors but they don't let that stop them.

Thank you very much and congrats on 100 followers!

✶ Idiota, I do care about u

      ┈       The best love story is when you fall in love with the most unexpected person at the most unexpected time.

★ Marc Marquez × VR46 Academy Male Rider – MotoGP Championship Winner.

☆ "Rivals" to Friends to Lovers. || WC: 965

Warning: Not really rivals, but yk VR46 - Marquez rivalry. Cursing as love lenguaje? (idk, I do that a lot tbh). And mention of Marc's injuries and surgery.

« K » Im excited too !! I thought no one was going to ask for anything about MotoGP, because there is very little that is not about two riders.

'k, this is pretty long too. But I really love the idea, so maybe I'm writing something similar in the future (plus the The Devils × El Diablo smau & the Chef × YT22).

Sorry Joan Mir, I steal ur Championship... maybe the 2022 from Pecco too. I tried to do it a little unclear so you can imagine other result if u want .

Hope yall enjoy it!

          2020 was a crazy year, but it was YOUR crazy year.

          You just win your first MotoGP championship!

          But you really wanted to fight with Marc for it, so you were disappointed that he couldn't race all year.

          Then, Portuguese GP 2021, and he's back.

"Hope to see you on track again, Marc" "You're gonna see my back the whole race" "You wish."

          Actually, you were pretty surprised when you saw him walking with his brother through the paddock. Internet was already flooded with articles talking about his come back— but you never read the news. Not even from the official MotoGP Instagram.

          You don't have all that time to waste,

          ... and even if you did, you wouldn't waste it reading junk news.

          Since Marc has a completely different style than yours, you get more excited about racing against him. You want to defend your title with the best riders on track too, and no one can deny that he is making history in the sport.

          You're not afraid to say it, even if you're at the VR46 Academy.

          Obviously, you're also excited to race alongside Valentino before his retirement & to have been able to celebrate your championship with him. Being part of his academy is an honor. But that doesn't blind you. You always try to treat all the riders with the same respect.

          Valentino's fights aren't yours, and Marc never gave you a reason to hold on to that resentment.

          Although, you can't deny that Valentino was right when he said that Marc is annoying as fuck (on the track, at least).

          Aggressive; he's never afraid to take risks, even if the odds of coming out well are low. He never stands still. He can't accept a place within the points, and he rides only thinking about winning.

          You, on the other hand, can sacrifice an on-track fight for a better place if it ensures you a consistent number of points in each race.

          If you're not sure you're going to succeed, you don't even bother trying. You think it's a waste of time and effort. You prefer to wait for the right moment or create it more passively, without running over others and risking crashing with them.

          That's led you two some good battles in past races, and you really hope you can continue competing against him.

          And you were doing it. The audience couldn't complain about the season they were watching.

          You, Marc, Enea, Fabio, Pecco... You really enjoyed the season.

          Although you enjoyed more a new closeness between you and Marc.

          Maybe you can call it a friendship? You two now talk when you see each other on the paddock, actually stopping to talk a little more, or even walking together. You two are always together when meet at press conferences, even if you are with other Academy riders.

          During the 2022 season, that friendship gets... closer? Like, really close.

          You meet his house, befriended with Alex too and their dogs... You love them. At this point, the Marquez brothers think you only go to their house for Shira and Stitch.

          Can anybody blame you? They are the cutest.

          At some point... maybe you started to think that Marc was also very cute. And maybe Marc started to think the same about you.

          But all that determination you had in the races seemed to stay on the track.

          It wasn't until Marc was injured (again) that your feelings were confessed.

"Idiota, don't scared me like that ever again" "What did I do??" "Get injured? And you make me think that you're about to retire, you asshole"

          He laughed. He knows that you actually care for the other rider's health, but doesn't understand why it seemed to affect you that much.

          Then, you asked for a moment without his documental's cameras.

          Deep breath and...

"I'm worried because I care about you" "Yeah, I–" "I like you... It's that kind of care" "Oh"

          You thought you were about to be rejected in the most stupidly tender way. Only Marc would care enough to reject you, taking care not to completely destroy your feelings. You were about to apologize, starting to mumble some "Forget it" or "I'm sorry."

          But you never apologized.

          A pair of lips made sure you shut up.

"Oh" "Sí, oh."

          He was laughing again when you two kissed a second time.

"Never scared me like that, I need to figure out how to ask you to date before" "I'll be more careful in the future"

          You never left a day without texting him or Alex to ask about his recovery. And when you were free from the MotoGP calendar, you went to his house to see him and help with whatever he needed.

          Alex was really happy that his brother had someone else to care about him too.

          Back to racing, you always had an eye on him, looking for him from your garage or walking around his. At this point, the whole academy was suspecting something. You didn't deny it; even talked to Valentino about your feelings. He didn't like it, but there was nothing he could do but wish you the best. Maybe take the opportunity to threaten him a little in case he hurt or betrayed you.

          So, after winning the Australian GP with Marc in second place, you two make it official. Not public yet, but you two are happy being discreet enough.

          The press didn't need to know about your relationship, only the people you both care about.

          You are happy like this, in your little bubble, which is sometimes questioned by the press for how "strange" it seems that a pupil of the VR46 Academy is so close to Marc Marquez, but you're together, which is the only that matters.

100 FOLLOWERS EVENT 481MCLARG | 28 . 03 . 2025 | CORREGIDO

[punanami]

maybe unpopular opinion idk... but i feel like people need to stop putting 'not proofread' on their works.

because if you aren't excited enough about your own work/thoughts to give a fuck enough to reread it—why would that make anyone want to even read it in the first place?

99.9% of the time i never feel like the 'not proofread' work is not actually 'not proofread'. sure, there might be a few errors here and there but overall unless you are just some grammar/language wiz that never makes an error and puts everything down exactly how you wanted it on the first go, you've likely reread/proofed your work on some level.

what I feel like people are really trying to say by putting 'not proofread' is "im not very confident in what I put out and I don't want you to judge me for it. so im devaluing my own work before you can."

to which I say fuck that.

if you like it, be proud of it. even if you aren't trying to be some literary genius. even if you just want to share your rabid incoherent fandom thoughts into the void—own it.

be confident in what you are presenting.

be excited about it.

it makes others get excited about it too!

we are all dorks in the same fandom who are seeking out similar content about our favs. even if you are new to writing, or recognize your skills aren't the greatest, or if whatever language you are writing in is your second language (which btw majority of y'all have better grammar than native speakers, especially when it comes to English LOL) people will still appreciate and enjoy your work, if YOU enjoy it.

you enjoying your own work is the only validation you need to publish it.

we appreciate your contributions!

also sidetone, I reread everything I put out 10+times and will still find brand new errors upon the 5th published reread so "proofed" doesn't mean perfect! especially if you are dyslexic and adhd (like me!) or have any other neurodivergent trait, learning disability or challenge. people have never pointed that out to me even if i'm inwardly cringing at the error like 'how are they reading this?!' lmfao.

[mintedwitcher]

im sure im not the first one to say it but i kinda hate the fact that the whole "bucktommys hate eddie!!!" thing took off at whatever point. bc like... admittedly, i don't like eddie NOW. but when i first got into the show (which admittedly it hasnt even been a year yet lmao admittedly a bucktommy clip popped up on my dash and i found them cute so i decided to watch the show from the beginning), i enjoyed him. i thought rg is good with comedy, and while i liked eddie, he just wasn't my favorite by any means and that was fine! i didn't really have any character that i disliked for the most part (even the antagonistic characters like doug and jonah were both in the ballpark of 'i love you because you're absolutely terrible and not being painted as anything other than that, i <3 drama and conflict' kinda like loving villains for being villains rather than woobifying em as a wittle misunderstood guy) aside from maybe one, and its heavily dependent on what season i'm watching.

but like idk. i think the end of s8 just ruined eddie for me, especially with the bts stuff and the fact that ppl have (imo) rightfully called out the fact that eddie's anger tends to just kinda get swept under the rug a lot by the show itself. fans excusing shitty behavior is normal fandom bullshit, nothing new, but idk it just feels like the show brushes it off and then has eddie rarely address his problems, at least not fully considering the whole "i gotta go be a dad to chris again" thing didn't even touch on the reason why christopher went to texas to begin with. he went from "guy who i was excited to hopefully see growth from!!!" to feeling stupid for hoping that eddie would take accountability for the kim stuff and apologize to his son.

but like. i never hated eddie before all of it. like i said, he just wasn't my favorite, and i just liked the way tommy and buck mesh together to the point where if they decide they want a new love interest for buck that they're gonna have to try really fucking hard to make someone better than tommy. hell, i liked all of buck's love interests even if i didn't really see any of them as endgame. i liked ana and marisol! i was pissed actually that eddie fumbled marisol so hard because she was cute and fun and i think she could have had so much more done with her!!! im not touching on shannon btw she's dead so there's no real point in bringing her (or kim) up imo.

is there no non-main woman safe from tim minear's writing (and thats being polite because (looks at henren mom problems) (looks at henren 'work-life balance' problems) (looks at the fact it kinda feels like maddie is reduced just down to 911 operator and milf just one chance maddie (and also chim) please /lh mom)) /j

idk it just sucks to get all the "why do you even like tommy he's barely on screen" bc the time hes "barely on screen" is more compelling to me than whats mostly on screen sometimes. i got attached to a background character with three lines who was only in ONE season of his show lmao like sometimes... whats not canon can be more compelling than whats canon if the writers fumble canon enough times. and for me, the writers have fumbled eddie one too many times :/ the grab + flinch "you make everything about yourself" bullshit was just the final straw for me and made me turn on a character i'd been neutral toward

👏👏👏

no words nonnie, you said everything that needed to be said here.

[m-musings]

HIII

im actually so excited omg i dont wanna sound mean actually the opposite but you write for a couple of pretty dead fandoms and im just so happy to see new writers for them.

can i request hcs for rotg (either jack frost, or bunnymund, or pitch, whoever you like. maybe the three of them??? idk go nuts show nuts) with a grim reaper reader? thanks! :D

Headcanons: Jack Frost, Pitch Black and E. Aster Bunnymund with Grim Reaper! Reader

A/N: anon I'm dying at go nuts show nuts, that's the funniest shit i've read in a while but anyways yeah, all 3 sounds good to me lmao. also, I wasn't sure if you wanted platonic or romantic so i just kept it on the friendly side, i hope that's okay!

NOTICE (7/10/24) : NO LONGER WRITING FOR ROTG

Word Count: 450 Warnings: mentions of death/ dead people

Jack:

Jack is a bit wary around you at first simply due to the nature of your job.

But once he sees just how gentle and kind you are with the souls you reap, he's back on board with getting to know you.

As he gets more comfortable with you, he'll definitely make fun of you like he does with the other guardians but he does it with love!

Jack will occasionally accompany you when you're reaping a younger soul. His presence seems to calm them down if they begin to panic, even if they sometimes can't see him.

If you ever get a break from reaping, he will invite you to participate in one of his famous snow day snowball fights as a way to forget about the sadness that sometimes comes with the responsibility of being a being of death.

He's still the excitable and reckless Jack Frost but when you're around, he's more mellowed out and - forgive the pun- chill to hang out with.

Pitch:

Pitch is intrigued by you from the start.

While he may control people's fears, it is a rare occasion for him to actually interact with one, let alone one as important as the personification of death itself.

He knows just how powerful a reaper can be so he is always sure to treat you with the respect you deserve.

The one time Pitch tried to convince you to join him against the Guardians, it ended with a scythe pointed at his neck and a stern scolding from you, so he doesn't bring that subject up around you anymore.

Pitch actually enjoys spending time with you though, he feels that your presence is much more tranquil and calm than that of the other spirits he knows.

He can be maniacal and full of himself but deep down he has a strange admiration for you and the job you do.

Bunnymund:

Bunny has known you for a long time and has come to highly regard you as an ally.

You two mesh well together, because without the deaths you take watch of, he wouldn't be able to help bring new bouts of life into the world.

He refuses to see any of the souls you may bring around The Warren though, it makes him kind of squeamish.

He will occasionally help you wrangle up a lost soul or two but it's very uncommon for him to be around during the actual reaping.

Bunnymund and you do spend the most time together just because your roles are so interconnected with one another (Guardians of Life and Death and all that).

All in all, You and Bunny are very close knit and have a great respect for one another.

[boba-at-323]

Stay-home dates with RIIZE !!

Note : OMG !! I had so much fun writing thisssss <333 || DID NOT PROOFREAD PLEASE || Also Idk what to tw but I have mentioned snacks a whole lot of time + I TRIED MY BEST TO MAKE IT GENDER NEUTRAL BUT LIKE SINCE IM FEMALE SO EXCUSE ME ;-; please enjoyyyy !!

Osaki Shotaro <3 !

Hmm, not a big fan, but as long as you're happy he is too !!

Omg !!

You ask him to film TikToks with you and he's MORE THAN HAPPY !!

So like you've saved a lot of trends and dances you wanna recreate with him.

He's so excited and gets all giggly over it!

Takes it a little too seriously…

Like you're looking at him with your jaw dropped and eyes wide because how did it take him one look to literally MASTER the dance.

Laughs embarrassed when you praise him !!

But you tell him that he's too fast for you ';-; so he apologises and suggests teaching you the dance step by step!

The two of you continuously burst into fits of giggles when something goes wrong.

ITS JUST SO FUNNY BUT IN A CUTE WAY FOR SOME REASON

You'd film like 29837209 TikToks and just have fun goofing around.

You might also end up exhausted on the floor reviewing the videos you filmed.

Thinks you look very cute and asks you to do this often with him!

Might get bored if you don't have a lot to do.

HOWEVER !!!

Would love to talk to you about anything really.

I feel like he's someone who enjoys conversing, so you might actually start having deep conversations that will last for hours.

Hmm rating 8/10 PLS HES SO ADORABLE <3

Rest of the members under the cut !

Song Eunseok <3 !

This man is literally so chill with everything.

Like you'd suggest going for a picnic on a volcano and he'd be like "lol ok."

Okay, maybe not that much but yk what I mean !!

So yeah you're probably sitting with him binge-watching some anime or series.

He's quiet the whole time and is actually very immersed in the story.

However, he will be passing comments every now and then.

And I tell you, these comments are so out of pocket???

Like you can't help but burst out laughing.

And he's just gonna look at you like "😐".

AS IF HE HADN'T SAID THE MOST FUNNIEST THING YOU'VE HEARD ALL WEEK.

So yeah be prepared cuz the witty comments he's gonna slip will crack you so bad.

Like it actually makes you question how his brain works

ESPECIALLY HOW HE DOES LITERAL STAND-UP COMEDY WITH THAT SERIOUS EXPRESSION !!!

But it's okay, that just means he's having fun!

Also, it's very hard to concentrate on whatever you're watching cuz he looks so pretty next to you.

Like you keep on looking at him, smirks 100%

"Yeah I know I'm too hard to resist"

GETS COCKY BUT CAN YOU BLAME HIM !!!

Also makes sure you get your share of snacks!!

I'd rate it a solid 9/10 cuz it's really entertaining!

Jung Sungchan <3 !

HE IS NOT ENTERTAINED BY THE IDEA !!!

But after much convincing, he gives in.

"At least we get to spend time together, right?"

YOU'RE BAKING TOGETHER YIPPIEEEE!!!

But what happens is like,

You're standing there tying your hair back, you ask him for help with your apron.

Gets a little too touchy

You have to slap his arm away and give him a death glare.

Pretends he doesn't know what he did rn 😔

Is actually a very good helping hand.

Like helps you out, follows everything you tell him to do, however...

Has his doubts, and totally shakes his head if he thinks smth is going wrong.

"Y/n are you sure it's 2 cups sugar?" "I don't think we should be using butter…"

NOOO ENDS UP GETTING KICKED OUT OF THE KITCHEN BECAUSE

Like he said, he takes up a large radius.

So this clumsy baby probably toppled over a lot of things, making a very big mess ;-;

Apologises repeatedly with sad puppy eyes 🥹

You kiss his cheek and tell him it's fine

Though you ask him to sit it out and let you handle the rest of the process yourself.

YOU DO DECORATE WTV YOU MADE TOGETHER SO HES VERY EXCITED FOR THAT !!!

I'd rate it a 4/10, this man is NOT meant to be confined to a small space.

Park Wonbin <3 !

Would prefer them actually !!!

He'd absolutely LOVE to cuddle with you throughout the day.

Like he'd just be clinging onto you telling you literally everything that happened to him cuz for some reason he gives me yapper vibes

Though he'd appreciate listening to what you have to tell him, leaving a trail of kisses all over your neck.

Also he LOVES your voice so much omg !

So he can also pull out his guitar and have a serenade with you (english 💀).

Would ask you your favourite song, and if he doesn't know it WILL make sure he knows it the next time you guys have an at-home date

If he knows, he plays it for you encouraging you to sing.

you tell him you think your voice sucks.

A DRAMATIC GASP COMES FROM HIS DIRECTION !!!

"Nonsense idc i just wanna hear your pretty voice <3"

Literally heart eyes for you once you start singing,

Like might actually melt, give you the softest, most lovesick gaze EVER !

There is a possibility he ends up messing up the cords cuz you distracted him !!!

He's so cute pls </3

Omg also, the two of you might also end up in the kitchen cooking smth together, blasting a playlist he made for you!

But you don't know that <3

He actually so desperately wants to do cliche romantic things with you but is too shy to initiate </3

It's giving that "Idk how to flirt so I'm just gonna stare at you till you marry me" meme

HOWEVER !!

Be prepared for endless back hugs because he's just so SO soft for you <333

Anyways yeah 11/10 (+1 is probably cuz I'm so down bad for him)

Hong Seunghan <3 !

My manz I miss him all day everyday ;-;

He's so sweet I tell you, agrees to literally everything.

Putting mbti and stuff aside, I think he'd actually plan out a few activities you could do together.

Like if you're going over to his place, hes prepared snacks and stuff for you.

Hmm !! Video games are a must I believe !!

Like I read he plays FIFA online???

SO yeah, if you know how to play, the both of you would spend hours playing together

I don't see him getting very competitive but will whine if you keep on beating him!

However, will also compliment on how great you are at the game!!

HE FEELS PROUD I TELL YOU !!

However, if you don't know how to play and absolutely suck (like me ;-;)

HE'D BE SO EXCITED TO TEACH YOU !!

When you mess something up, or like if you can't understand something, the pout on your lips makes his heart EXPLODE.

Like he thinks you're the most adorable ever, he'd start squealing if his pride lets him.

Ends up attacking you with kisses and hugs.

The game is long forgotten, just a clingy Seunghan showering you with love because of how adorable he finds you.

I'D RATE IT AN 8/10 TBH BECAUSE HE'D FORGET WHAT PERSONAL SPACE IS !!!

Lee Sohee <3 !

SPENT SO MUCH TIME THINKING SOMETHING FOR HIM 😭

Unlike Seunghan, I can see him playing board games and such with you!

For example, the two of you could be sitting on the floor playing UNO.

But that got boring CUZ HOW DO TWO PEOPLE EVEN PLAY UNO !!!

So takes out a Jenga set because he thought it was very entertaining!

Both of you are screaming SO much when either chooses the wrong piece to remove.

HOWEVER, HE'S USING THE SPECIAL SKILLS EUNSEOK TAUGHT HIM!!!

Which is unfair to you and you WILL whine about it.

"All is fair in war and Jenga"

HIS WORDS NOT MINE !!!

Laughs at you because you're definitely the one who's going to topple the tower over.

So yeah you all spend a lot of time giggling and screaming over board games!

OMG ALSO !! Thanks to Anton, he bought some Lego sets too!!

You all start good but eventually get so frustrated because you can't find one tiny piece.

Ofc you give up and spend the rest of the evening with his karaoke machine !!

HE !! WANTS !! TO !! SING !!

And please you're just so mesmerised the whole time he's singing.

Like woah??? His voice is so good even when he's goofing around? INSANE!!

Though you aren't losing to him, so the both of you get SUPER competitive.

RATING THIS A 7/10 !!

Lee Anton <3 !

Like Wonbin, he'd also enjoy stay-at-home dates.

I can see him enjoying doing anything, to be honest.

Like for example, the two of you could just be lying next to each other sharing with each other reels you see.

Or just him listening to you telling him some tea from your workplace/college etc.

Sitting on the bed together with a variety of snacks sprawled around.

Like Sohee, I can even see him building Legos in silence with you cuz this guy is so patient !

Oh also!

He'd pull out his laptop and shyly ask if you'd like to listen to the music he's created.

After listening, your face is the shocked Pikachu meme.

"Woahhh my boyfriend is so cool :OOO"

Get's blushy over the compliments you shower him with.

Brushes it off saying it's nothing.

THATS A FREAKING LIE LEE CHANYOUNG!!

NEways, teaches you how to try making music.

Laughs if you cry about how difficult it is, he thinks it's adorable.

You ask him to delete the trash you've made, but he creates a separate folder to save everything you've made with him.

ITS ART TO HIM !!! HOW CAN HE THINK SMTH YOU'VE CREATED IS TRASH?!?!?!

Plus he treasures it so much like only if he could somehow just make you feel how much it means to him !!

SO YEAH !

Pretty cute, very cozy, overall nice experience 10/10 <3

Thank you for reading reblogs and reviews are appreciated ! <3

Title : Stay-home dates with Riize || Word count: 1652 || Genre: fluff ! || Pairing: Riize x implied Fem!Reader (tried making it gender neutral pt.29382938)

[safyresky]

One thing I TOTALLY get is why everyone ships Emma and Regina. Like. I get it.

Okay so I'm rewatching ouat and I have an ISSUE okay. In episode two Regina is like "The Honeycrisp apple is the most vigorous apple and hardy and shit, fucking have one" and gives Emma a RED DELICIOUS APPLE? BITCH, PLEASE.