#idk if they'll kiss in the final version

[localbisexual333]

Arcane season 2

ok so kinda mad at netflix bc even though they're finally taking matpat's advice, i want the rest of season 2 of arcane already. Finished watching the first 3 episodes and loved them - spoilers ahead, you've been warned

Ambessa's plan or what we know of it is def going to backfire. Cait only did what she's done bc she's grieving and bottling up her feelings. Mel even says that she doing a good job at hiding her feelings. Also the black rose thing is connected to the hexcore thing im pretty sure. It's like another version of corrupted magic or something.

Jinx and Sevika have a lot of similarities. Their little bonding scene was nice and i kinda hope they'll both be alive at the end of season 2. Isha (the name of the kid Jinx helps - thanks subtitles) is also cute and if Jinx lives she would definitely be raising her. If Sevila also lives i totally see her helping jinx raise isha.

Victor is totally accidentally going to start a cult. We see him heal that one shimmer victim (forgot his name) and the rest of them bow to victor. My theory is the hexcore which is now inside victor - is using him to corrupt others like the shimmer victims. We already see it infecting the trees and the hex beam thing. Also quick theory about how the hex beam thing got corrupt is last season victor coughs blood and some falls. Thats probly how - victor's blood fell and stuck there starting to infect it. Back to the cult thing - later we're likely going to see it infect more people till there's an army and then the hexcore will fully take control. Or victor starts a cult that helps later on and the hexcore isnt actually evil. But heimerdinger's (i def spelt his name wrong) warning last season and jace being like 'we were wrong victor'makes me think its evil.

Vi and cait have kinda flipped sides. In season 1 vi is impulsive and takes action a lot. Now we see that with cait. Also, they finally kissed good job - but that small progress is now gone :(

Finally im gonna end off on mel. Mel in the intro has shadow hands coming for her in her first part. In the second part of the intro she's in see screams them away. Finally she's sitting on a couch with a black rose. Earlier in thr intro her mom ambessa squishes or crunches up a balck rose. Mel picks it up. My theory is that mel is being pressured into what everyone else wants but later in the season she going to take back control. We see her forced to be fine with enforcers invading the undercity. Which is part of her being controlled. How she takss back controll idk. Maybe leading her mom's army is she dies or something. Also ambessa dying is likely i think bc of mel picking up a black rose. Continuing where her mothet left off or something. Now at the end of episode 3 we see her get taken away, she's definitely gone to wherever the black rose person is. The magic used does seem to corrupt/mindcontrol ending in the victim dying (poor elora). And it seems to appear and dissappear without a sign. But it does have a weakness - a combination of runes as we see carved into that spear one of ambessa soldiers uses. Im wondering what the debt is that needs to be payed. It has to do with mel's dead brother but what did we get himself into? Idk maybe stole something he wasnt supposed to or stuck his head somewhere it didnt belong.

But yea those are my theories and stuff. If you read down to here thank you i wrote A LOT so thanks for reading all of it

If you have a theory or observation leave it in the comments

[chirpsythismorning]

Idk what’s worse, the fact that there are milkvans out there that believe El commissioned Will’s painting, or that a majority of milkvans believe she didn’t, but still think everything Will said to Mike in the van scene applies to how El feels about Mike as well. And honestly, how could they not? Mike looked very happy and emotional hearing Will's words in the van... no shit they're hoping that's how El feels.

But El never called Mike the heart. El never said she needed Mike and always will. Those words coming from Will's feelings for Mike, then being used to inspire Mike to give his monologue to El, was disingenuous bc it was never El’s feelings being responded to in the first place.

‘It only works if it comes from you’

That’s the whole problem. It didn’t work bc it was coming from Will, not El.

IF everything Will said applied to El, why not have it come from her?

No, but seriously??

Is s5 just going to open up to El apologizing to Mike for ignoring him after the monologue, followed by her just repeating everything Will said with her own twist and Mike being like cool!! That works for me!

The problem with making the narrative choice to instead focus on Will's feelings at the forefront, only to follow it up with El's identical feelings, does nothing but make the whole thing fall flat.

Instead of seeing this main couple voice their love for each other themselves, I gotta have her brother do it for her?? And only then after he does it, can I see her do it in like a 2.0 version of sorts????

So many milkvans are willing to acknowledge that Mike and El’s dynamic throughout the series is riddled frivolous conflict more than anything, with little to no time dedicated to showing the development that actually matters. They say they wish the show spent more time with them actually face to face acknowledging how they both feel verbally without the constant cloud of some other third party interfering, causing them to have issues. They say that this time though, they think the Duffers will magically pull through for them and go from what they believe is shitty writing to ‘good’ writing, based in terms of how they'll handle Mike and El's relationship in s5...

But that's not realistic on any front, milkvan, byler or otherwise.

And that's a big part of the problem, bc they know the pacing has not been great for them, and they NEED the show to just give them Mike and El so they can be happy, but that's not how you build up suspense for a love story. And dragging out Mike and El any more, would just be a repeat of every other season before. They reached their peak and so they can only down from here. That's kind of the whole point.

One thing to note is that the Duffers always create conflict for the incompatible couple early in a season, so that the audience doesn’t feel too uncomfortable with the idea of considering the other option that’s at the forefront for the rest of the season.

This will ESPECIALLY be the case for byler, bc Will already has home wrecker allegations as it is. And it's also a highly controversial queer ship, and so people are going to be making claims left and right that it’s wrong bc of xyz.

They just wont be able to have byler scenes loaded with romantic tension all season long, more than any other season, and with the story making it more obvious they want us to root for them, while also having Mike and El still be together. And it's simply bc the reality is the Duffers have a record of doing the complete opposite of that.

This is also endgame territory, so there is a serious pressure on the writers part to get their audience to be closer to rooting for byler than denying it even being possible. Meaning they NEED the audience to be watching their first kiss and, for better or worse, be thinking, FINALLY just get it over with already!

Also what's El's supposed to be up to while this is happening? Are we assuming she's just stringing along waiting for Mike to get his shit together? Like Jesus!

El has every right to say her piece and get that shit over with, by episode 1 or 2 at the latest. She could be a focused on Max and her family and friends, which if you'll note also includes Mike and Will, but instead this time without the pressure of her having to hope that something will turn around and suddenly Mike will decide he finally loves her... She doesn't deserve that.

Byler is clearly the route they are taking. If that is the plan, it's time to make this separation so that the audience is finally confronted with viewing Mike and El without the constant rose tinted love at first sight goggles, and instead give them a chance to be their authentic selves.

And I think El, being a character that could barely speak in s1, that her not getting her own voice in this situation is fucking serious. El not being able to say those words to Mike herself, like there's a reason for that. And so when she finally does get to say how she feels, there isn't going to be any room for subtext or misunderstanding, not on the audiences part nor Mike's. El has always been pretty clear about what she wants and I think that will apply in s5 now more than ever.

[quackle]

So what’s your opinion of this season’s ships?

the short version: rajbow is still peak, ripaxel is funny, and priyaleb is meh. more rambling details under cut:

rajbow: i feel like i say this a lot but i loveddddddd the cheating plot (i never ever thought i'd say these words, even though they have a different meaning than world tour lol). bowie's one of my fav reboot characters, and the way we got to see his character development through his internal battle with morality was so interesting. raj really makes him want to be a better person. that's what a relationship should be like! and to see a queer couple show that lesson is so huge for me as a queer person. rajbow will always have a special place in my heart. also they are so cute like LOOK AT THEM AHHHH!!!!!

ripaxel: i know people were mad about this one, some for valid reasons. ripper was so focused on getting axel's attention and somehow breezed through half of this competition while doing some of the most ridiculous things. and once ripper finally scored, a lot of axel's remaining scenes were with ripper just making out, so we didn't get a ton of an individual arc for her either. however. i am unable to take this ship 100% seriously. (i've tried! i just can't! personally!) and because i can't take it 100% seriously, that's what makes it so hilarious to me. they're both weirdos. and that somehow works, even with their negative tension from first season. it's like that one teenage couple from high school. there's a 99% chance they won't last, but they're gonna kiss as if they're gonna last lifetimes together. idk. they were funny. to me. so i enjoyed it. (poor ripper tho... i wonder how they'll be in the finale if they get a scene together.)

priyaleb: this one is... ok. i don't outright hate it. personally, though, i find it just a littleeeee bit boring and not needed. i won't lie: there are some tiny points where i'm like, "oh they are so cute actually!" because we get to see priya with this teenage crush, something she probably never got to have due to her upbringing. and her and caleb have these moments of banter that i enjoy. like these specific scenes from eps 6 + 8 had me all smiley:

but overall, i could've lived without this plot. not because priya lasted a long time last season already (i like priya! i'll be sad when she goes!), but because i feel like there's wayyyy more to priya than some miscommunication within a romance plot. like, why are we acting like priya's upbringing was anything healthy? where is the attention on that??? and most of caleb's character is tied to priya at this point. i feel as if i made a caleb compilation of his scenes from this season, most would have him going "ah, gotta make sure i'm in this alliance with priya," or "ah, i have a crush on priya now." this is the farthest a returning first boot has made it—which is huge!—but we're getting a miscommunication plot with him. sigh 💔 maybe we'll get more individual caleb if priya goes home before him, but it still sucks we didn't get to see him as an individual as much.

[dxwnfxll]

Spicy Jack Bright x Reader ?

Sure! (At least i shall try lolol)

For everyones sake i'm gonna use the version I came up with for 'Dr Bright/Shaw' which is Dr. Ambrose

Sorry for so many name changes but this should be the LAST time.

Dr. Amar spicy time

Dr. Amar has a male body for this, but will use any pronouns

-You and Jack were just chilling around the office, you two were in a relationship and have been in one forrr a couple months?

-Jackhad begun to get more *clingy* towards you, always wanting to be near you and touch you. You could probably already guess as to why, so you just prepared yourself for the day she'll finally ask you

-after all you've heard 'stories' about his 'lovemaking' how they're a damn masochist, how rough she can be so you just mentally prepared yourself. After all you DID want this lol

-You heard Jacks chair move as he got up and walked over to you, you looked up at him as he just looked down at you with a smile

-you smiled back at him before he sat next to you on the couch she totally didn't steal from someone elses office.

-they held your face in their hand before leaning in and kissing you, you closed your eyes as you leaned into the kiss

-she held your sides as their kiss got more 'hungry' as if he had been craving this for so long, which most likely they had

-you felt yourself fall back onto the couch as she was above you, he grabbed your arms holding them above you as they looked down at you smirking "you've been waiting for this huh?"

-you didn't know what to say as you could feel your face grow red, they leaned in for another kiss before trailing the kiss from your jaw down to your neck

-you gasped as they kissed 'the spot', Jack bit down immediately as they heard the gasp. Which in turn made you moan and squirm a bit under her

-they leaned back up once they thought their work was good enough and proceeded to kiss down stopping once they reached your chest.

-they let go of your hands "you sure you're ready for this?" You nodded as you felt your shirt become discarded elsewhere leaving you bare.

-eventually both of your clothes were off, and you both were back into a deep makeout session on the damn couch

-she was between your legs, your legs wrapped around him as you two continued your lil makeout sesh

-eventually he pulled up "ready for this pookie?" You frowned at the name as she laughed "sorry babe, you know me"

-with that you felt them enter slowly a gasp escaping your lips as they did so.

-man was she a 'beast in the sheets' of course they took it slow if you asked, but you were still covered in marks and so was she

-she's really driven by pain, oh yeah all those times of dying has realllly affected their 'kinkyness'. She's not wanting you to bring a sledgehammer into the bedroom though, but she definitely loves it if you're also a lil rough in bed

-whatever body he's in will depend on how they act in bed, of course they'll be rough either way but sometimes if they have a 'fembod' she'll definitely want you to call her 'mistress' in bed

-idk what else to write for this as i'm bad at spiciness

Hope you enjoyed this requests always open!

[justoutsideofdoncaster]

Blog #3

Todays hangover wasn't nearly as bad as yesterdays. I can't believe I went out again. It was a really good night out though, no matter what the hangxiety says.

I remember when we all finally got inside and met with the others, just standing and smiling and watching all these idiots dance and sing and yell and jump on each other and I felt so so happy. I'm so much closer to my team now then I've ever been before.

He obviously wouldn't stop staring at me, so much so that one of the girls came up and said that he was - I told her I knew. It's strange, he's so sweet and shy and awkward and then he gets drunk and all he does is stare at me all night with those big stupid puppy eyes.

I do love having a crush, but of course I haven't done anything about it. I've always been that way. It's hard for me to believe anyone could look at me like that, so I'm just waiting for the inevitable moment when they snap out of it. When they see me for who I truly am, not some romanticised version. I've never felt good enough to be someones girlfriend. It's largely the asexual . I can't give them enough of myself, or I won't, and I know that when they find this out they'll no longer be interested. And I know there are plenty of asexual boys out there, but for now I have a crush on a boy who could never date me. So that's why I stand, under the strobe lights and the fog machines and the confetti and the music and all of it, and I do nothing. We share a shit eating grin and everyone holds their breath waiting for one of us to move, and he doesn't because he's shy and unsure and I don't because what? I move forward and then what? I pretend I want to kiss him? No I won't do that. I'm willing to spend my entire life alone rather than pretending to be something I'm not for the sake of some man.

I woke up to four deleted messages from him. He could have any girl on the team but he's picked me and I think it's probably driving him crazy.

Anyway, that whole low self esteem - i'm gonna die alone - asexual fuelled self hatred crap can be unpacked in another blog.

I watched some lectures and had some food (guac on toast for dinner, vegan burger with fried egg and mushrooms for tea), and went in to the studio for like four hours. Managed to kick out an entire painting, which is pretty baller especially considering I felt nauseous the entire time. I also planned on going to the gym today, but the hangxiety is telling me to stay in my room. I've not been to the gym in weeks which sucks, but I honestly don't think I'm gonna go tonight.

Also, meal wise, ate really well today! Don't feel guilty either really, although maybe it's because last night I got KFC and then proceeded to throw it all up... so... not my best moment.

Small side rant: My flatmates were pissing me off today. I've been out two nights in a row, which yes I did drink a lot the first night but that's still just two nights, and they're acting like I'm crazy or pathetic or something. Writing this I know I sound paranoid and I know it's not that deep but idk, both of them have specific quirks that are just rude and nasty and it always makes me feel bad. Little comments and looks. It annoys me so much because they both like to act so caring to others, but it feels like I'm the only one who actually gives a shit about others feelings, more than myself, enough to put their feelings before mine. Just basic functioning adult stuff. It's always the people who call themselves empaths or people pleasers that are actually the hardest to be around. Only one more year though, and then I'm free from living with crazy people. Deep breaths.

Anyway, here's a painting I'm currently in love with by Jennifer Packer (2012-2017). That blue is just beautiful. I've been using a lot of Ultramarine at the minute.

Bye

[venusdebotticelli]

Hello, I'm here to add some honking! :D

Disclaimer: I went replying to your post as I was reading it for the first time, so some of the things I point out here are things I realised later on that you'd already pointed out in your op as well, so the reply is a bit of an out-of-order mess, I will admit. You can see the exact point at which I realised this and despaired further down the post, but I just wanted to apologise preemptively for being an adhd riddled clown, @girlbossblackbeard 😅

-"I also wonder if the shot of roach shooting a canon at something is him shooting a canon at her"

I'm pretty sure Roach is shooting one of the Revenge's cannons here!

That looks very much like her poop deck, and he's wearing the flower necklace from the torture party, so that's either some celebratory cannoning, or maybe they see the torturers' ship approaching during the party itself, but realise too late to have any chance to stop them from boarding? Another possibility might be that the torturers (or at least some of them) are already present at the party from the get go, since the main guy is also dressed all fancy and has that violin bow, they just infiltrated the ship with our pirates none the wiser until it was too late. (And I'm basing this on nothing but vibes, but I think the torturer may be working with/have been sent by No-Nose?)

-re: the wanted posters: "is this in the republic of pirates?"

I think it might be the entrance to Spanish Jackie'z or somewhere nearby, just because of the similar stone arches.

But there's plenty of Blackbeard wanted posters all over apparently, since the one Stede removes from a wall is on a wooden wall. Also hilarious that on this one the only other poster nearby seems to be an ad for a "Portraiter", because oooofff, yeah, the navy sure went for the most racist/least accurate one.

Also yeah, all the shots under the rain on the street and around Susan's food stall give me Republic of Pirates vibes, very much. I also think that first pic I've included up here might be Stede witnessing the Prince Ricky guy they've briefly allied with getting his nose cut off by Jackie, and this is also a good chance for the Swede to ditch them and stay with the love of his life, who won't try to eat him (or at least not in the cannibal way, hopefully :P)

-"where the fuck is ed when he's sitting in the chair smoking???"

I also have a theory about a bunch of stuff that happens while at Anne and Mary's! :D The tl;dr of it being: EdStede are married and divorced and insufferable while crashing at their place, and Anne and Mary don't just put up with it nicely, they dig their finger in for the drama/chaos/shits and giggles/"maybe they'll finally leave our fucking house if they figure their shit out" :P Anne kissing Stede in front of Ed very much serves that purpose 😁

-"no more booze, no more drugs, and no more _____" not sure what the end of that sentence could be but we know that the "stede" that was put in there is NOT what he actually says!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Ooooohhh, I hadn't noticed that, it does sound like it may be cut from a different scene, now that you pointed it out, although I'm not 100% convinced, idk 😅 Did you have any reason for this theory other than the way it sounds?

-"WHAT IF WE GET THE AITA SCENARIO WHERE ED AND STEDE TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THEIR VERSION OF EVENTS AND NO ONE REALIZES THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT EACH OTHER UNTIL THAT MOMENT BC THEY'RE BOTH SO BIASED ABOUT ONE ANOTHER"

I WANT THIS DESPERATELY 😂

-"the revenge crew is blowing up SOMETHING on the side of a building. maybe to cause a distraction or gain access inside the building? is it the side of Spanish Jackie's?? also hiiiiiiii lucius <;3"

I think Olu's bar fight, Ed's scenes dressed like "a poor" where he's drinking with Jackie, and Leslie Jones's quotes where she mentioned shooting scenes where she fought side by side with Ed might all be the same scene/sequence of events! I already talked about it a bit on this post's tags, but I think No-Nose Prince Ricky could be the one to blow up Spanish Jackie'z, as revenge, and the crew get caught up in it!

-"you're going through that 'if i was a regular dude' phase"/"why would ed be considered a regular dude now?"

I don't think it's that he's *considered* a regular dude by others, so much as it's part of his healing journey of trying to find himself, he's really really trying to be one, "just trying something different, man". I also cried a bit about it in the tags of this other post and the one I already linked in the previous paragraph, but I think the fact that he's wearing Buttons's jacket during this scene may have come from Ed approaching him as a sort of spiritual mentor or something for advice? I just really want more Ed & Buttons interactions, I crave this ;U; I think we may get an arc where Ed tries a different method of wellness and mindfullness or whatever for each episode, including:

-Cleaning up all the drugs/booze/whatever from the ship with Frenchie's help

-Getting high as a kite and bitching and moaning with Anne and Mary

-Going "back to basics", trying to be just a normal dude, being all zen about worldly matters after a talk with Buttons

-Whatever is going on with Hornigold's ghost in the forest/cliff scenes (although as pointed out in one of the posts I just linked, this could be a dream sequence, some fever hallucinations precipitated by almost drowning during the storm, and paralleling Stede's fiery fever dreams from s1. And the headbutt is during this/right after waking up from this, as he still has the cravat that he had on during the storm.)

But none of his methods of cleansing himself of Stede and trying to figure out who he is as just Ed, on his own, actually work, because Stede is following and pestering him throughout most of these? (which yeah, could point to Ed straight up running away to the forest to have his introspective hallucinations in peace, since Stede won't fucking leave him alone :P and then after that yet another reunion during the fight scene at the beach?)

-"ed has a red ring"

I haven't got many deep thoughts about this, but I've also been trying to keep track of Ed's rings, yeah :P Apart from what you said about the red one (which I think the one from this season actually looks a lot more square and slightly more muted in colour than the round one from last season, so maybe not the exact same ring?), I'm also really charmed by his Kraken ring, and the massive green ring on the ring finger of his left hand, which seems different from the one he had last season

Also really interested to find out when exactly he ditches/loses the gloves, and whether they make a reappearance at some point later on in the season or not (it seems to be around the same time that all the necklaces other than the pearl one disappear as well?).

-"someone is a vampire on the ship."

The mental image of Izzy the gangrenous vampire is absolutely sending me 😂😂😂

-"i'm pretty sure stede in his training scenes with izzy is wearing the clothes he wore in that final shot of s1"

During the ones on the ship, yeah. But then there's these ones with the Steard:

And I'm pretty sure this is Stede's fantasised version of just what a good pirate he is now :P Aside from the extremely piratey beard and the snazzy red sash, he's also wearing leather trousers, because everyone knows the best pirates have those 👀 And during the beach duel Izzy still has both legs, which I think is interesting. Also, the sash is made from the same fabric as the sad little scrap he wears as a necktie:

-"or he puts his jacket on before jumping off the cliff"

To me it looks like he's still barefoot and in short sleeves in the shots of him sinking in the water, so he probably does go in the water a lot this season, just living his Little Mermaid life, as @amuseoffyre has been rightly pointing out :P

-"ed his holding his right side as he slashes that dude on the beach"

I said this on one of your previous posts about it, but now I think none of what I said on that post applies really, because I think the headbutt scene happens way earlier than the beach fight scene, which may happen after the torture party scene (or soon before? is the party to celebrate escaping the navy again? but that wouldn't really explain the lack of an earring during the party, as you pointed out, and Ed *may* be present during the party, but we haven't seen any indication of it, and the beach fight scene does seem like one of the multiple reunions this season [this one maybe after the forest finding himself arc, if it's not a dream sequence?]). And also that bts pic would indicate that the hole is already there as early as him wearing the bun and cleaning the ship, so it might not be anything *shrug*

-"that person is our boy lucius!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he's wearing a beret??????"

I really really like this theory, but from what I can make out in the blurriness of the movement, this person seems to have all ten of their fingers? So idk :S I do agree he's likely the one in the Buttons zip-line shot though :D My bet is still on this being the reunion:

-"i think jim is behind stede as he breaks into the weirdly religious room we saw in the teaser when stede punches that guy??"

Yes! And I have many more thoughts about that, I wrote them down further below before I reached this part of your post 😅

-"ed in buttons's shirt looking so PEACEFUL what the HELL."

See, this is what I get for replying to your post as I read it for the first time, instead of reading the whole thing first and then replying, because yes!!!!!! My thoughts exactly!!!! I just put them a bit differently up there without realising you'd already talked about this elsewhere in the post 😅 My sincerest apologies for the way my brain works, I am now realising what a mess of a reply this is, but I'm in too deep to turn around and fix it now :P

-"what i believe is the treasure chest we see jim carrying off the ship"

I agree that the chest in Ed's quarters look like the one they're carrying off that ship, but if I may add even more details:

The guy Stede successfully punches is dressed like the crew from that same ship where Ed is dressed like the vampire clown Blackbeard version, still with the makeup on, and shooting at something¿? (I don't think whatever he's shooting at is actually Stede, because you can see Frenchie and Jim's heads on the bottom left of that shot, and they don't seem all that interested in whatever Blackbeard is currently doing, they're just focused on their loot/corpses/whatever. And idk how I feel about the theory that Izzy loses his leg because Ed shoots it, rather than just gangrene, but if we were to go with that one: what if Izzy and Stede have been collaborating in secret, and this raid is when Ed finds out? I don't want or particularly expect that prediction to actually be right, but just putting it out there *shrug emoji* It could then also lead to Ed's "very rough night" and recruiting Frenchie to help with cleaning up his act the next morning?)

Also, when Stede does his swirly bit with the coat he's very much aboard the Revenge, because that's what the internal doors look like on the ship:

But I have no idea how that fits in the timeline. I think there may be a gap between when he first finds the coat, until the moment he gets to actually put on the whole suit with the matching pants¿? Or maybe not¿? Maybe all of that is happening in eps 1-2, which is an insane amount of information¿?¿??¿¿? 🔥🙌🔥

Also, I just realised this after I wrote all of that, I think this might be Jim going in behind Stede into the "I did a punch!" room¿? What's going on?¿?¿¿?¿?¿?¿? 😭

Tl;dr, I am losing my whole mind trying to piece a timeline with this scene 🔥🙌🔥 The reunion could be as soon as ep1 going by this?¿?¿¿? While Ed is still in Kraken mode?¿¿?¿??

Edit: I figured out a more plausible timeline on its own separate post

-"the fucking hair dye dripping down izzy's forehead in this production still"

And!!!!! the whip tied to his waist too, which we see at some points throughout the trailer too :D

.

.

.

And yeah, my brain is fried by this point, everything else you added on the reblog I already touched on in different ways throughout this post or on the other posts I linked, so I'm gonna crawl into a hole for a nap now, or something, after I make a separate post for my revelations about that red ship!!! 🔥🙌🔥

S2 TRAILER ANALYSIS WITH 1 BILLION SCREENSHOTS

obligatory warning that this post is gonna be SOOOOOOOOOOOOO foolishly long and rambling with all my silly little theories and thoughts and if you ALSO have silly little theories and thoughts you should ABSOLUTELY share them here please!!!! we can clown so much harder when our cacophonous honking harmonizes!!!!!!!

NOW ONTO THE POST (putting it under a read more so tumblr doesn't literally explode):

-the revenge looks BUSTED AF: i don't know if this is from general disrepair when ed is in his kraken era or if she was in a battle but her sails are all dirty in the opening shot of the trailer, and later we see stede on her deck with tattered sails and ropes everywhere, AND i'm like 99% sure that the shot of buttons ziplining from one ship to another is him going from the Chinese warfleet ship to the revenge, which i'm guessing is essentially stuck bc the sails are so torn they would never be able to catch the wind strongly enough to move her. I also wonder if the shot of roach shooting a canon at something is him shooting a canon at her since we had all those allusions to her exploding from samba, vico, and david on twitter all those months ago

-stede's earring: he DOES NOT HAVE THE EARRING when we see him lying on the deck next to roach and sighing dramatically nor does he have it during his conversation with Olu about stede dumping him, but he DOES have the earring in later shots like the beach english fight and when he's talking about being a failure his whole life which means WE WILL GET TO SEE STEDE GET HIS EAR PIERCED!!!!!!!!!! we'll get to see him make the decision to look even hotter and who knows who does the piercing for him idk!!!!!! @sluterastede had a dastardly beautiful thought in her brain about ed giving stede the piercing and stede making groaning noises and izzy once again thinking they're flapping their jacks right there on the deck in front of god and everybody!!!!!

-stede is spilling his heart out ("i let him down. i should've just told him how i feel") to susan on her ship (you can tell it's her by the long hair)

-interesting that there's a drawing of a donkey next to ed's wanted poster considering s1 had the line "a rich donkey is still a donkey". also i can't really read what the surrounding posters say other than "WANTED 20 GUINEAS". is this in the republic of pirates?

-stede says "i will find him" meaning ed may be actively avoiding stede at the beginning of the season???? (or the basic laws of travel physics have finally caught up to them)

-"look, captain, you know blackbeard's gonna murder you" i just think it's interesting that Olu is referring to him as blackbeard again even though ed told everyone in his pink robe era to call him ed. like it makes sense that he'd say blackbeard considering ed is on a rampage but it just made my brain wheels start spinning

-the Kraken crew are eating cake :)

-ed is holding a torch while letting the storm rain down on him: i don't think the laugh we hear is his because i don't think his mouth is even open during that slow-mo shot

-STEDE with a TEAR in his EYE as he says "i think i hurt him pretty bad"

-ed sobbing on the floor while the little bride cake topper is next to his head

-ed choking on the weed smoke i'm ACTUALLY crying, but also: where the fuck is ed when he's sitting in the chair smoking??? i thought it was on deck at first bc above his head is really dark and it looks like the lanterns we see on the deck of the revenge but there's a chandelier too?? it might be whatever shop Anne Bonny and her friend "you two know each other?" run bc behind ed in that chair is just a bunch of random furniture and a chandelier like we see when ed and stede are at the market. in fact, i think ed is smoking with Anne Bonny because I think that's her hand in the corner of that shot:

-"no more booze, no more drugs, and no more _____" not sure what the end of that sentence could be but we know that the "stede" that was put in there is NOT what he actually says!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-"you two know each other?" now hold on a sec because it kinda sounds like stede met Anne Bonny and Co. separately from Ed/before that market scene (maybe in the teaser clip of Anne on Stede's lap??) WHAT IF WE GET THE AITA SCENARIO WHERE ED AND STEDE TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THEIR VERSION OF EVENTS AND NO ONE REALIZES THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT EACH OTHER UNTIL THAT MOMENT BC THEY'RE BOTH SO BIASED ABOUT ONE ANOTHER

-the evil guy definitely got his nose sliced off by Jackie. good for her :D I also don't think the evil guy is Hornigold, i'm still holding onto my theory that the man in the white rags we saw in the teaser and this trailer are hornigold's "ghost" that ed needs to contend with to find his inner peace or whatever a la stede with nigel's "ghost". but i DO think the evil guy is the rich prince dude from that leaked audition tape from rhys's friend. if memory serves, the guy wants to buy his way into the pirate lifestyle but he's pompous and entitled which makes him reckless. based off the production stills we also got today, he still had a nose when he went into Spanish Jackie's...but i don't think he leaves with one. so because he gets butthurt over invading a space that was NOT meant for him and faces the consequences of purposely disobeying their customs, he defects to the english navy and goes on a rampage against all piracy, very MRA energy :/ also, later izzy says to him "you don't know the first thing about piracy" which would further support that this guy just tried to buy his way in

-izzy gets an honest-to-god pegleg but he doesn't start the season off with it because we see him in several shots with both legs, like the wedding raid and swordfighting stede on the beach. unsure if he loses it due to infection from the toe situation or if he gets shot in the knee like i've seen some posts talk about, but @sluterastede mentioned that one of the leaked audition tapes for archie included dialogue about an amputation so maybe that character has to uh. Get Her Roach On

-as i mentioned before with the teaser analysis, izzy is clearly training stede for something and now im guessing it's the english but like we kinda knew that !

-olu is in a bar fight??

-THE "ED GETS CAUGHT IN A BUCKET ON A ROPE DURING THE STORM AND GOES OVERBOARD" THEORY IS OUT. THE "ED TIES HIMSELF TO A MF BIG ASS ROCK AND JUMPS OFF A GOD DAMN CLIFF TO GO ON SOME SOUL-SEARCHING JOURNEY UNDER THE SEA" THEORY IS IN. and what the FUCK is the rag man doing with ed up on that cliff hello?????? if my theory is correct and that is in fact hornigold's ghost or whatever, what advice or harmful shit is he saying that makes ed do that?????????????????????? but do note the large rock with the rope around it in the first pic

-the revenge crew is blowing up SOMETHING on the side of a building. maybe to cause a distraction or gain access inside the building? is it the side of Spanish Jackie's?? also hiiiiiiii lucius <3

-"our entire escape relies on this" i'm just assuming they're trying to escape from the english bc that seems to be the Big Bad of the season??

-not plot related but during the rope swinging training session izzy slaps stede on the ass and makes this face (sir??????):

>he also has his pegleg here so their mentorship may ramp up after izzy is out of commission for hand-to-hand combat. maybe izzy was supposed to have a larger fighting role alongside ed in defeating the english but once he became incapacitated he realized he would need to train someone else up for the job so ed would be sufficiently protected. but it also had to be someone izzy knew would be willing to die for ed to save his life if it came to that, just like izzy would

-"i've been a failure my whole life. it's not so bad once you get used to it" is stede talking to ed here? is that ed's hair in the corner of the frame??

>side note: as mentioned above, stede also has his earring by this point!!

-"you're going through that 'if i was a regular dude' phase" first of all, SPANISH JACKIE AND EDWARD TEACH BEST FRIENDS TRUTHERS RISE UP. second, why would ed be considered a regular dude now?? how did he lose his reputation? did he willingly give it up or was it taken from him? is this permanent or just temporary? or did he fake his own death with the cliff and the rock thing so he could retire and live a more normal life?? the swede doesn't seem scared of him at all in the final clip from the trailer, straight up asking him if he's poor and going "back to basics". of course, that could just be a power trip from being one of Jackie's newest husbands (or at least her waitstaff)

-possibly totally minor/just a continuity error thing, but: ed has a red ring. we saw it in s1 as he picks up the rather fine cashmere and we see it as ed dramatically drapes himself across the ship's helm with his head on his hand. we do not see it in the scene where he's smoking (see above) or the scene where he's talking to the rabbit. now, if you'll allow me a little bit of clownery for a moment, red has been explicitly coded in this show to be a symbol of love/the heart, especially as it pertains to edward like his red silk scarf as a metaphor for his heart in s1. what if. what if he. gave the red ring (his heart) to. SomeOne. because.....................because his heart belongs to st--[GUNSHOTS]

-olu, jim, and archie with garlic around their necks and making a cross with their fingers - clearly they think someone is a vampire on the ship. @sluterastede proposed it could be izzy, especially if he's on the brink of death due to an infection and frenchie managed to spread his superstitions to other people on the ship!

-THIS FUCKIN GUY. WHO ARE YOU??? it seems like he kidnaps stede and his crew and throws a party on the ship and drugs the drinks which is why everyone is kinda tripping/laughing in some parts. but then everyone gets tied down (stede to the mast, wee john's hands get squished, olu and roach's heads get squished, and jim and archie's feet get secured to the ship's railing i think??). also that wide shot is definitely the rando dude hitting some shrill high note at the same moment the revenge crew cry out in pain from all the squishing (except maybe jim and archie - they might just be laughing at the others bc they're badasses and this pain is nothing). also don't know what the guy is looking at when we first see him but im thinking maybe it's a wanted poster of stede and he's looking at the description of the gentleman pirate to confirm it's the dude right in front of him/that he's captured?? also i think roach is wearing flowers from the drug party in his apron when he fires that canon, so maybe he's tripping too and shoots a canon?? i need a prayer circle for the revenge's safety at this time

-stede has a bullet hole???????????????? did ed fucking shoot him in the heart?????????????????????????? he also notably does NOT have the earring in this scene but he does have the sexy stiddies (blue) shirt like we see in the other shot where he DOES have the earring. maybe this weirdo dude pierces stede's ear bc he thinks stede needs to look more piratey?? or stede gets absolutely sloshed (or drugged) and gets his ear pierced idk !!! maybe jim does it bc they're effortlessly cool and has a bunch of ear piercings!!!

-idk if this is a coincidence or not but i'm pretty sure stede in his training scenes with izzy is wearing the clothes he wore in that final shot of s1 as he rows to find the crew on the island (white linen shirt, dark pants, brown belt and boots). so either costume changes are happening later in the season, they're reusing outfits like normal people do, or the training montage happens extremely early on in the season

-so originally with the teaser trailer i thought ed falling in the water was followed by the shot of ed coming out of the water on the beach. i don't know if i fully believe that anymore because ed is NOT wearing his jacket on the cliff (see above), but he IS wearing it as he comes up out of the water, so either it's two different events and ed just spends a lot of time in the water this season or he puts his jacket on before jumping off the cliff

-ed his holding his right side as he slashes that dude on the beach so he definitely got hurt in battle but i hope it's not him getting stabbed bc ur supposed to cleverly take the sword on the left where all the unimportant bits are :(((

-I VERY STRONGLY BELIEVE that the person in the scene where stede turns around and shoots his gun into the air and everyone else on deck suddenly draws their weapons against that person is our boy lucius!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he's wearing a beret?????????? @sluterastede proposed that lucius got picked up by the english navy after getting thrown overboard and that's why we see him in the english navy garb (which we later see frenchie in too?? i believe an infiltration fuckery is afoot). also the fact that the shot immediately after this one is of Black Pete doing a happy little fist pump which i'm choosing to interpret as a cute little easter egg symbolizing Pete gets reunited with his love. i also also also believe lucius is in the shot of buttons about to zipline from one ship to the other. i missed him :')

-okay i know i said in an earlier post that stede running across the beach was romantic but i changed my mind and i think izzy is just making stede do cardio as part of his training lol. his outfit matches the one he's wearing when swordfighting izzy in that earlier wideshot and i think he even still has the scarf belt and the full beard in both scenes (explained at the end of this post via production stills) so maybe they have an honest to god training montage that takes course over several days and we get an incredible 80s powerballad to play on top of it while stede thinks of ed to motivate him or whatever. david jenkins hire me to help write season 3 i have ideas

-i think jim is behind stede as he breaks into the weirdly religious room we saw in the teaser when stede punches that guy??

-ed is pretty bloodied in the shot of stede leaning over him and saying VERY worriedly "ed????" so my theory is that ed got hurt in battle or he was taken captive by the Chinese warfleet and stede was worried he was grievously injured. however, once ed comes to and realizes who's kneeling over him, he gets pissed and headbutts stede because he's still mad at him for breaking his heart, and maybe his hands are restrained/his body is too weak so he can't push stede away. or maybe they had to begrudgingly work together on some mission and stede fucked it up and ed got hurt so he's mad about that idk!! ALSO HE'S WEARING THE CRAVAT HELLO

-ed in buttons's shirt looking so PEACEFUL what the HELL. obviously it's from the same general time as him being in Spanish Jackie's when she's talking to him about being a regular dude and later when the swede asks him if he's poor addkjfajdfhlkefh i fucking love this show and its writing so much. but ed says "no, i'm just trying something different man >:/" so i wonder if this is ed at the end of s2 or if this is more towards the middle as he's still in the thick of his healing journey. maybe buttons teaches ed about meditation and/or the tai chi he practiced with the Chinese warfleet crew??

-the BTS production still of ed with his "trust no one" tattoo also features what i believe is the treasure chest we see jim carrying off the ship in the shot where fang is smashing two dudes' heads together!

-i also think the BTS production still of stede with the beard is early on in ep 1 because he has a full beard (that im hoping someone on the revenge bullies him into shaving off to the scruff we see in the rest of the promo materials) and ALSO because he's wearing a long red scarf around his waist, which we never see again in any of the other promo material - except, however, around his neck as a makeshift cravat:

>it's the same exact material and everything! my guess is he gets his ass handed to him in a fight (maybe against izzy??) and his scarf belt gets destroyed, so he repurposes the shredded fabric into his necktie

-there's literal gold bars in the background of this production still lmao the kraken crew got BUSY during ed's goth era

>speaking of, the fucking hair dye dripping down izzy's forehead in this production still:

*sad clown noises*

in conclusion:

WE'RE BACK BABEYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

anyway that's my second dissertation on less than 2 minutes of content that turned out to be quite literally 6 pages long :)

[wasithard]

Ok I haven’t read them yet but I see u have only posted one of ur folklore bits and I feel like u knew I was gna ask for more..... blease can I see some sequinned smile black lipstick.... 🥺😭

annie u actually made me realise that i forgot to put one of my wips on that post oopsie! i’ve updated it now. also ik there were only two to choose from but as fate would have it sequin smile black lipstick is the one featuring love sex magic!!!!!!!!!! can u believe, how long ago were we talking about it??

DISCLAIMER for everyone Percy is NOT consuming alcohol in this chapter ok! Drink Driving is NOT OK.

sequin smile, black lipstick

Annabeth likes to think of herself as a brave person. Even so, she’s not brave enough to tell her best friend that she’s in love with him.

She runs her finger along the edge of her bottom lip, fixing a non-existent unevenness in her shiny black lipstick to buy herself some more time before she has to leave the bathroom and re-enter the party.

Normally she has a better hold on herself than this, but something about the alcohol in her blood, the snug fit of his skinny jeans, the way his eyes had lingered on the midriff exposed by her cropped old band shirt when he first saw her tonight is making it harder for Annabeth to remember why she’s spent so long convincing herself that the risk of telling Percy how she feels and maybe hurting their friendship isn’t worth it.

She needs to sober up.

There’s a knock at the bathroom door.

She needs to sober up now.

“One second!” She calls out, meeting her own gaze in the mirror and muttering, “Annabeth Chase, you are stronger than this,” before straightening and walking out of the bathroom before she can second guess herself.

Annabeth decides to hunt down Rachel, who will probably laugh in her face about the fact that Annabeth is freaking out over this and effectively remind her of how ridiculous she’s being.

Instead she runs into Percy.

“Hey!” He says, steadying her with his hands on her arms, his eyes on hers. “I’ve been looking for you. Wanna dance?”

She hears the beginning notes of a Ciara track on the speakers above her and grins. What a shame she hadn’t found Rachel first to talk some sense into her. “You know,” she starts, a teasing tone dripping easily into her voice, “There was a time when I would’ve had to beg you to ask me to dance with you.” She starts walking in the direction of the makeshift dancefloor in the next room, “I’m proud of this growth, Percy.”

“Shut up,” he groans, nudging her with his shoulder and grabbing her hand, spinning her under his arm and into the crowd of bodies dancing with varying levels of coordination. “If you want to talk about who’s improved the most since middle school, I could say a lot about how you’ve learnt not to step on my toes anymore.” Annabeth rolls her eyes at him but doesn’t miss the way he keeps hold of her hand after she’s finished spinning. She uses it to spur her on, running her hands up his arms until she can hook them behind his neck and pull him closer.

“Touché,” she says as his hands come up to rest at her waist, his body swaying with hers to the beat.

Percy and Annabeth are friends. Best friends. Despite the ceaseless teasing of their classmates, they are decidedly nothing more than friends. Sure, they’ve kissed a few times. It doesn’t mean anything.

At least, it doesn’t mean anything Annabeth is willing to admit to herself.

There are moments when she lets herself forget that there are consequences to her actions, though. Moments when the feelings Annabeth spends most of her time ignoring demand to be felt, so she holds on to Percy a little bit tighter, stands a little bit closer, lets her gaze linger a little bit longer.

It doesn’t help that he seems more than willing to indulge her on these occasions.

So tonight they’re holding onto each other, dancing to 2000s music. There’s a disco ball hanging from the light at the centre of the room, and the light it reflects casts shimmering squares over Percy’s face as they watch each other. She feels it, an electric tension that seems to always hum between them but only flares up at certain moments – like right now. Percy’s hands tighten at her waist and she’s one second from pushing up onto her toes so she can press her lips to his when all the lights in the room come on and an adult female voice starts shouting at the Stolls for hosting a party in her house without telling her.

It might’ve ruined the moment, but the adrenaline rush she gets as the entire mob around her start streaming for the exit fires her up just as much. Grinning, she grabs Percy’s hand and makes for the front door, patting Travis Stoll on the shoulder as she runs past he and his brother getting lectured by their mother in the midst of the chaos.

By the time they’re outside and in Percy’s car, both of them are panting and laughing, buckling their seatbelts as Percy’s starts the engine of his old truck. They hear a tap at the back window and turn to see Charles Beckendorf and Silena Beauregard waving through the glass. Percy rolls the window down and Beckendorf says, “Got two spare seats?”

“’Course, man,” Percy says, and the couple file into the car. Then they’re off, exchanging escape stories and guessing what the Stolls’ punishment will be and eventually falling into a comfortable, tired silence as the high starts to wear off.

When they reach Beckendorf’s apartment, he and Silena get out of the car with a “Good night,” and Annabeth watches the boy loop his arm over his girlfriend’s shoulder as they walk into his building.

She turns back to Percy to see him watching them too, making sure they get inside safely. The way his green eyes reflect the streetlight in the darkness of the car is dazzling to Annabeth, and when his gaze meets hers she’s already feeling swept up again in the interrupted moment they’d shared at the party.

She doesn’t think, her hand just comes up to cup his cheek and then they’re kissing in his car.

It’s gentle and slow, like they’re both conscious that the moment is fragile enough to break if they’re not careful. Her hand stays on his cheek, and his own on the wheel, and in the quiet of their embrace Annabeth feels a section of the tight shell around her heart loosen.

They both jump when Percy’s phone vibrates with a text message, and Annabeth snaps her hand back into her lap, her mind reeling and well and truly sobered up. What was she thinking?

“It’s just mom,” Percy says, clearing his throat, “Asking when I’ll be home.”

Annabeth doesn’t respond, just stares directly out the windshield while she waits for Percy to reply to his mom and then pull out from the curb. He switches the radio on and neither of them speak the entire drive back to her place.

Before she gets out of the car she meets his gaze. Somehow, seeing the nervousness that she’s feeling herself reflected in his own eyes brings a soft smile to her face and lets her body relax.

“See you on Monday?” She asks, and he visibly relaxes too.

“See you on Monday.” He smiles.

She walks up the path to her front door and looks over her shoulder to wave at him after she’s turned the key, knowing he won’t leave until she’s closed the door behind her.

At school on Monday she berates him for forgetting his homework and it’s like the kiss never happened.

[dengswei]

idc if you wanna cut bits out to do an uncut ver for paid users but at least have the free version make sense when you edit it because how do you go from phat crying that phob is gone at the end of part 3 to having phob & phat sitting there together in part 4 and not expect me to be hella confused

[mr-voorhees-husband]

ANON IM SORRRY I DID A DUMB BUT

THIS IS FOR THE ANON WHO WANTED PENGUIN N HARVEY DENT X VIRGIN READER

Also I'm sorry for being like, hella dead on here. Life's been life, to put it bluntly.

How about.. Arkham!Twoface and... Reeves!Oz

Warnings/tags: losing your virginity, soft sex, very gentle, Daddy Kink (Oz), slightly ooc Harv? Idk its my hc version so..

Reader: Gender Neutral, virgin

Arkhamverse! Harvey + Harv Dent

Good god are they soft.

They were scared that you'd yet to sleep together, but, when you finally came clean? Both were so relived they didn't even realize what you said at first.

The first one to fully react it Harv, he wasn't as worried about the 'no sex' thing as Harvey, surprisingly. So while he was relieved, it clicked almost immediately.

He chuckles and grins, taking control so he can yank you to their chest and tilt your head up with his hand, Harvery's resting on your waist, "Why didn't ya' just say so, Doll? Y'know we'll never judge ya'."

Oddly gentle for such a sleazy, rough man, but it's simply because he can understand it. He technically was a virgin too, even if Harvey wasn't. Yeah, he'd know what to do, Harvey had plenty of experience, but, he'd never actually had sex before.

The idea of you both being eachother's firsts made him giddy, already planning the perfect date night to end with you three in bed.

Harvey, on the other hand, when he comes too, is so completely awestruck. He really had expected someone else to sleep with you before him.

The fact no one had though... it's kinda hot to him. Unlike Harv, he's excited at the idea because this means he gets to mold you to be absolutely perfect for them

They both get very possessive at the idea, though. This means they'll be your only frame of reference, and if they do good enough? You'll only ever want them.

"Oh, darling..." Harvey mumbled against your skin, watching in awe as you whined and squirmed on the bed. They'd been unintentionally teasing you for what felt like hours, calloused fingers stretching you open while a rough hand rubbed and stroked your most sensitive parts. "You look amazing."

"Harrv.." You whined, hoping that maybe if the other took control, they'd finally fuck you like you'd been planning for them too.

"Yeah, dollface?" Harv muttered, moving up just a bit to kiss your chest. They didn't stop their assault, though, continuing to bring you to your third climax of the night. "What'dya need?"

"You two- please-" You almost sobbed out the words, moaning as they sped up their ministrations.

"Soon, sweetheart." Harvey promised, kissing your jaw.

"We'll fuck you real soon." Harv agreed, nipping your clammy flesh with a lovestruck grin.

Over all, extremely soft and sweet about it. When they fully take you, they're muttering praises against your skin. Harvey telling you how good you're doing, thanking you for letting him do this, while Harv is growling out how good you feel, how gorgeous you look splayed out like that

Aftercare is a must, of course. If you're exhausted, they'll carry you to the bath and help you scrub off all the sweat and cum, cooing softly as they do it. They're absolutely in love right now, literally over the moon that you'd trust them both enough to take your virginity.

The morning you have breakfast in bed and a nice planned day of relaxation and plenty of cuddles.

They secretly hope you'll want to do something else that day, something a bit more sensual, but they're happy to just have you in their arms.

Reevesverse!Oswald Cobblepot

Okay let me explain, my friend's version of Oswald literally made me simp SO hard that I went looking for an Oz that was similar. I read one fanfic of this guy and he won me over. Sorry anon I declined I was wrong this guy is such daddy material, i will gladly write for him now <3

"Hm? Oh, okay, sweet cheeks."

Yeah, that's his response. It takes him a moment to fully process it, honestly, but he doesn't tease or mock you, he never really does. Instead he urges you onto his lap, kisses you softly and goes "do ya' want daddy t' change that, sweet thing?"

Immediately after you agree though, he's giving you that smile he gets when he's made a good deal, kisses you again and softly tells you to wait here until one of the girls comes to get you.

Eventually, when one of the girls do come and grab you, you make it into your room and are pleasantly surprised to see how much Oz has set it up just for you.

He'd make it overly romantic, but, in a good way. Candle are lit, some soft music in the background (or the slightly muffled music from the club below), with nice silk sheets and champagne or wine (whatever's your preference) for when you finish.

He starts it off slow, letting you set the pace so he knows for sure how you want to handle it. Getting you to straddle his thighs, hands resting on your hips as you kiss and slowly grind down against him.

He's so unbelievably sweet, the exact opposite when he's in the club. The sleeze isn't gone, but the teasing is, giving you whatever you whine or ask for in moment. You want his mouth on your neck? He'll gladly oblige, licking, kissing, and biting every inch of skin he can reach.

Oswald has to prepare you, definitely, he may not be that long below the belt, but he's wide. He won't even humor the idea of fucking you properly until you can take at least two fingers, though, preferably three.

When you're finally nice and loose for him, though, he'll ask you softly if you're 100% sure you want this. When you agree, downright begging him to fuck you already, he gets a small, loving smile and shushes you gently.

"Go slow, sweetheart." Oswald groaned out, keeping careful hold on your thighs so you couldn't try and slam down like you wanted too. "I know ya're excited, but ya' gotta go slow so I don't hurt'cha."

"Ozzie please-" you moaned softly, trying to force him deeper inside you. "Ozzie-!"

"Shhh... C'mon baby, be patient." He urged softly, lowering you down just a bit, biting back a grunt as you clenched around him. "Daddy'll get there, he's just gotta make sure ya're not gonna hurt."

"Daddy..." You whined, being met with a kiss from your lover. He mumbled softly against your lips in Italian, letting you take more of him inside you. "Daddy please.."

"Paitent baby," Oswald smiled, kissing your lips once more, "be patient for daddy and he'll make it worth it. I promise."

Afterwards, he'll help you sip on some cool champagne, before pulling you to the bathroom for a nice shower before bed. He's way more cuddly than usual, too, large arms keeping you to his belly and chest all night long.

In the morning, he'll call you both up some breakfast, and ask if you'd let him give you oral before it gets there.

"Just a snack before breakfast, sweetheart, where's the harm in that?"

An insatiable, depraved, incredibly soft and sweet man indeed.

[drawlfoy]

So I usually dislike intense bitterness or anything that seems bland. I like matcha (which idk if that counts lol) and I’ve tried chamomile but I also don’t usually really enjoy that. I prefer more sweet/floral-y flavors

oooh i love matcha and that's good to know!!! i also have a burning hatred for chamomile lol. if you dislike intense bitterness/bland teas, i would recommend just being really careful with the types of brands that you buy tea from. this is especially true for floral teas, because it's surprisingly easy to mess up jasmine greens/rose/hibiscus and make it bitter. my favorite brands are murchies and steven smith, but if you want a more affordable version i love pg tips (if you're looking for black tea) and twinings. also, make sure you're not brewing your tea for too long. do notttt be the type of person who drinks your tea with the teabag left in. no judgement if anyone reading does that but i only recc that if you like bitter teas!

ok, specific recommendations (and sorry for how long this is, i'm trying to avoid doing my final paper) (also if you don't want to order fancy teas online the decaf option has a lot more things that you'd just see on store shelves):

caffeinated options

—if you're gonna go to starbucks, get an iced chai. not a hot one bc every hot chai ive gotten from them has tasted like dishwater. the iced chai is always.v good i feel like they put honey in it or something but i literally know they dont dfjksa;lf

—if you go to a boba shop, order a thai milk tea! i feel like u might like that one. it's the most vanilla esque of the black tea family. its giving marshmallow vibes im ngl.

—earl grey from steven smith. (DO NOT buy off of amazon, no guarantee they'll send u the real thing lmfaooo) im gonna b honest bestie i think this one might be the best for you if you like something floral and want a pick-me up caffeine wise. if you don't want this to be too bitter, mix with a splash of milk of your choice, vanilla, and sugar. ideally if possible use vanilla syrup, but it's fine if you can't. diy london fogs literally saved me this semester. earl grey has notes of bergamot and it gives the floral/citrus vibes while still having the fullness of a black tea.

—vanilla chai from bigelow. this was all i drank in my first semester of uni. it really warms you up and i think the vanilla is a nice way to add

—baker street from murchies. sooooo use your best judgement on this one because it may not be your cup of tea (ik thats not funny im sorry) as it is p smoky. if you're curious about lapsang souchong but are too afraid to commit to something that extreme (it is a very polarizing flavor...some people refer to it as gunpowder flavored but i promise it is just smoky and cozy like ur sitting outside by the fire), then do this tea. baker street is inspired by sherlock holmes and is a little more floral and sweet than lapsang. it's my all time favorite tea ever

—canada breakfast from murchies. this is english breakfast if u like sweet and you cry over how strong irish breakfast is. this is maple syrup sweet. my mom has a giant sweet tooth and loves this. if its too strong add a splash of oat milk in there and a spoonful of brown sugar!

—jasmine green tea from steven smith. DO NOT overbrew this one. it will make u sob. this is a very delicate, soft floral that also has some caffeine and umami moments w the green tea. so so good if you're a matcha fan. chefs kiss.

—library blend from murchies. this is a little floral and blends well as it's a combo between green and black teas. it's rlly lovely :)

decaf options

—iced lemon loaf tea from tazo. i've yet to meet a single person who doesn't like this. it's sweet while still having a little bit of that lemony citrus. v good to drink while doing hw.

—bengal spice from celestial seasonings. it's hella important that you don't brew this for too long as it is very spicy and has a lot of cinnamon notes, but it's super cozy and a little sweet. do be warned that this has a tiny bit of a licorice aftertaste, though.

—country peach passion from celestial seasonings. so lovely, nice n sweet, if you like iced teas this is great iced as well. don't be scared off by the chamomile taste note. im not a chamomile fan and i enjoy this tea

—honey lavender tea from yogi. OH MY GOD every time i drink this i feel like im ascending. literally crave this rn. oml. so so good. it's great to fall asleep w.

—sugar cookie sleigh ride from celestial seasonings. it's one of my guilty pleasures lol it's sweet and i could honestly drink buckets of this

—vanilla sleepytime tea from celestial seasonings. i apologize for the heavy emphasis on celestial seasonings LMAO im not rlly an herbal tea kinda gal so most of the decaf options i've had are all from my childhood. anyways the vanilla definitely scales back on the chamomile and another plus side is that it will absolutely knock u the fuck out

—lemongrass tea from steven smith. a little on the pricier side, but mix this with some honey and literally see whatever deity you believe in (if you believe in any). also i acknowledge this has some chamomile notes but god this is so refreshing and amazing

ummmm ok so apologies if this isn't exactly what you're looking for (ik this is a lot and may not be for someone who doesn't want to buy expensiveish teas) but those are my top recommendations! also if any of them are too bitter i recommend adding either agave/honey to floral and herbal teas, and brown sugar and a little milk of your choice to any of the malty black teas. happy tea drinking adventures! lmk if you try one and like it but no pressure!