#idk if that would work but that's the idea i have rn. im learning slowly but surely

[risingsunresistance]

only problem with this design rn is that i can no longer choose to go forwards or backwards, so i cant link up multiple of them. just goes back and forth

but tbh it goes so fast i dont really see that being a problem kjfhg

[yourloveaton]

Just scroll through everything I have missed. The fuck you mean Trickster doesn't sleep ?!?? What. Did I get it wrong? Am I not understanding something?

Plus, about my last ask about Undyne. Or if to be more concreting about the Asgore's "maybe ask Trickster to train Undyne a bit" part of the answer. I personally really can't see him doing this. Because Trickster is kinda...not..really... in the guard??? Like you get it? Yes, Sans started doing this while he was part of the guards, WE knew that. And yes, he might be associated with them in the eyes of other monsters. But realistically, how can someone who's identity you don't know be officially a part of the government structure? So that means you can't really say this person what to do. You can ask nicely and hope that this will work, but ehh idk about that

Of course, there is another explanation for this possibility. Trickster simply was given a job offer as part of a guards at some point from Asgore. And now he gets paid twice. As Sans and as Trickster. LMAO, just think about it XDD Which actually made me think, does Sans get paid at his job at the laboratory??? Or Gaster just taked him as an unpaid intern. Ahahahah, that would be cruel

OKAY I’m slowly getting back to the inbox IM SO SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT AGAIN 😭🙏🙏 It’s been so busy I couldn’t have the time to seriously sit down and write earnestly…

HAHAHA WHERE DID U GET TRICKSTER’S SLEEP HABITS FROM He does get sleep, but I guess it’s so little enough that nobody has seen him sleep or anything related to it rlly !!! Who knows 🤷

Yeahhh I get your reasoning !!! Let me try to brainstorm and explain what I’ve thought for Trickster’s position in royal guards and anything related to it

Asgore and Sans know each other, through Gaster since in this au Gaster and Asgore were friends that worked together, Gaster introduced the skelebros to Asgore long time ago

I in all honesty haven’t thought throughly about the Trickster’s royal guard role and its details yet cuz I’ve been working on his other parts of his lore, which took more priority as of now AHAHA

But as I was saying, Trickster’s existing connection with Asgore and how his silly reputation with the underground would have reached to Asgore’s ears eventually and and and UGHH MY BRAIN IS NOT WORKING SORRY Gaster could’ve told Asgore too actually AHAHHAAHA many possibilities happening here

but what I wanted to say is that, Asgore would know Trickster eventually and THAT IS WHY he could’ve asked Trickster to do little training session for Undyne since Asgore would’ve wanted her to learn and experience new things from someone different than himself, also it’s his close friend’s son like he’s sure he got some tricks up to his sleeve that could help undyne’s growth or WHATEVER I THINK THATS WHAT I THOUGHT AT THE TIME?? I genuinely don’t remember anymore….

Yeah sorry… I lowkey forgot most of it let me think again… The royal position he’s gotten could either be a sentry or u know, replacing someone’s role for a time because of reasons? Cuz one of the ideas I had was that Gaster heard Asgore’s talk about maybe royalty guards and role replacement or whatever was talked about so Gaster might’ve put Trickster to handle it??? IDEK IF I EXPLAINED IT PROPERLY IM SO SORRY I’m in brainstorm mode rn I’m not good with writing 😭😭😭

But errr errr yeahh something along the way, could be worked more on it later on..

Trickster was an unpaid intern for a while actually AHAHAHA but he did eventually start getting paid for it, not that it matters much cuz… yeah… they’re lowkey rich…. Trickster is a nepo baby 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

anyway, thank you so much for your asks again, I appreciate them SO SO MUCH you’ve got no idea !!! Makes me enjoy developing Trickster’s lore even more too ehehehee 💖💖💖 Let me know if u didn’t get any of these or just have another question heh

[prettyboykatsuki]

fang do you ever get overwhelmed by the future? what are some ways you deal with anxieties surrounding like job prospects or school-wise? i think you're very rational and would love to hear your perspective on any tools you use!

ahh idk if im the right person to ask this since a lot of my beliefs come from my circumstances. pre-emptively i have a family that will always house me and feed me. thats the culture.

but ill tell you my philosophy. i do get anxiety about the future sometimes and about how im not moving fast enough or something else along those lines!! pretty often actually.

either way im young. ill bet you are too. all the happiest people i know are twice my age. my life is just starting for me. i have no intention of feeling like im running out of time when im not

because i went thru a lot i know life isn’t about endurance. its about sustainability. its easy to get wrapped up in the idea of creating a perfect future and being valuable. but suffering catches up with you. right now - i could go and push myself to the very limits to accomplish something. but it wouldn’t matter because its not a life i could sustain.

i know my own limits hella well so i say work with yourself for a life you can tolerate. a life you can live for a long time. im applying for jobs but i haven’t received any offers so im finding other ways of making money (babysitting, tutoring etc). i help my parents with as much as i can. my sleep schedule is fucked so im spending my summer trying to fix it. im building my credit score (its good rn!!) im teaching myself math and java again so i can transfer in a year. these are not things i pour myself into. its just shit i do to work at it slowly

im never gonna be a person who can go at a hundred miles an hour. never. ive tried and ive failed. i got my steady twenty five. but its better to go steadily and slowly and always keep going then to go 100 and stop dead in your tracks. its better to persistently do the bare minimum than regress after running so far. its better to take one class and apply to one job and read one lesson everyday than to push it so far you stop or not try at all.

for me the only thing ive ever learned is the universe pays its dues so im not worried about the future. it doesn’t matter what it looks like to anyone but me. did you do just one thing that will make tomorrow better? then thats enough. you did great.

do what you’re capable of not what you think you should be capable of. as long as you are doing that much i really think things will work out. and if they dont and if you fuck up - learn and try it a different way. just keep doing it. little by little

[kvgehiras]

waaaa i'm sure whatever you have typed up is great!! if you ever decide to post it, i'll look forward to it ♡

cough cough SO UM,,, ik this is oddly specific but i hope you don't mind aha .. a character of your choice with someone who has some important exams coming up soon, maybe?? i've like ... procrastinated like all of my work and slept through the entire few weeks before,, so i'm currently on the brink of eternal sleep (my fault, wholly, really) i don't mind who, just pick your favourite/s!!

thank you in advance!! qwq

hello again anon!! THANK U AAAA i might post it after the current event ends bcs im busy grinding lately lol but i will post it soon so i hope u like it ehe ;; as for ur schedule PLS SLEEP !!!! i do know the feeling off not doing any of ur work nd just resting but sometimes it's ok anon! studying when ur not feeling like it will only feel like a chore nd u probably wont be able to retain any of it. so study when u want to, bcs while exams r important, so r u hehe <3 anyways here r the charas!! wrote a lil scenario for mika, leo, nd rei!! hope u like it <3

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

KAGEHIRA MIKA

• mika overworks himself alot, mainly bcs he just wants to prove, to himself and others, that he is worthy of being a part of valkyrie

• but he still likes being a lil spoon when yall r cuddling (o˘◡˘o)

• while he is a powerful artist when hes on stage, he just melts when hes in ur arms yk!!!!

• so he doesnt mind it when lately u seem to be slacking off a bit more than usual bcs he gets more cuddles from u !!!!! #mika1stwin

• but when u suddenly stop out of nowhere nd even refuse to come out of ur room at times bcs uve procrastinated ur work too much nd if u do not finish going through ur material then ur doomed to fail nd oh lord-

• "(y/n)?"

• u look up at ur bf nd hes standing beside u- w his stuff in his hands.....?

• "ah ya see.....ya've been lookin' a lil stressed lately so i thought abt.....helpin' u like this! idk what is troublin' ya, but im here to always listen! :D"

• u break into a grin, one mika had missed so much, nd grab his cheeks to plant a kiss on his cheek

• nd still keeping ur hands where they are, u pull away to look at his bright red face

• "thank u mika... ill always be here for u too, ok?"

• nd he quickly nods, scared to meet ur eyes, esp bcs of the close proximity of ur faces rn

• what a lil baby

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

TSUKINAGA LEO

• leo is honestly the last person u want to see when ur trying to finish learning ur material,,,that too in a rush

• like!!!!! u love him u rlly do but this bitch will start doodling abt his inspiration nd all nd ur brain just cant focus yk

• that, nd also that if u dont give him Any attention At All he will literally wither away nd basically refuse to sleep nd WILL stare at u till u give him kissies (nd he alrdy doesnt sleep enough........ sigh)

• so when he wakes up in the middle of the night (the one night u managed to somehow get him to bed) nd doesnt see u in the room a part of him panics

• he quickly calls out for u nd when he hears u respond from the study room, he opens the door to see u slowly turn around from ur chair, tired, shoulders slumped over

• immediately rushing over, leo tightly wraps u in a hug, a hand running through ur hair

• "(Y/N)!!!!!!!!! WHERE WERE U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I THOUGHT THE ALIENS KIDNAPPED U!!!!?!!???!!!!!!! DONT LEAVE ME AGAINNNNNN ｡･ﾟﾟ*(>д<)*ﾟﾟ･｡!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

• "leo it's 2 am.......nd also i didn't leave u, u know? im right here!"

• the exhaustion was very evident in ur voice, so much so that leo pulled away only to squint his eyes at u nd go "r u not ok? u sound tired ...... gasp r u DYING????????? NOOOOO U CANT DIE UR MY INSPIRATION!!!!!!!!"

• "leo thats v sweet nd while yes i Am dying im not leaving u it's ok"

• leo smiles, which turns into a grin, nd then he suddenly gasps again nd oh lord what idea is it this time

• "(y/n)!!!!! how abt i sleep here????????"

• ".....huh?"

• "YEA!!!!!! didn't u leave that room so u wouldn't disturb me?????? but im lonely so......ill just sleep on ur lap then, ok? ok! good nightttt!!!!!!!!"

• nd then he places his head on ur lap, the other half on his body relying on the chair he was previously sitting on for support

• while he isnt wrong abt the disturbance part.....he does look content here.......nd he does feel lonely so ......

• mayb u just gotta learn today what u can wing everything at this point...... it's gonna be ok . probably....?

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

SAKUMA REI

• unlike the other two, rei wouldn't even have to guess that ur not doing ok, he would just Know

• nd what does he do to help? flirt w u nd get u to let him teach u obv!

• he Knows it's not rlly teaching, nd so do u, but what can u do when he looks at u w those puppy eyes of his, nd says that he'll do anything nd everything in his power to always help u

• so when he does take in whatever u have to study he..... he realises he's Also bad at this

• good job rei rlly helps out a ton!

• anyways to make up for it, nd also stick w his promise to help u, he tells u to go through the material, nd explain it to him! he heard somewhere that it works bcs it forces u to rlly understand the concept instead of memorising it nd u think it should work

• but oh god how is it supposed to work when rei keeps looking at u w stars in his eyes, nd his hand suddenly grabs urs nd he circles his thumb on the back of ur hand nd IS HE FLIRTING IN THE MIDDLE OF A STUDY SESSION

• rei playfully quirks an eyebrow when he sees u get flustered nd just . lay ur head on the table w sigh nd just whine

• "REIIIIIIIII I HAVE TO STUDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

• he chuckles bcs he does realise what hes doing to u nd honestly he loves ur reactions so he keeps doing it

• "fufufu.....sorry love, i'll be quiet now. go on, do ur thing." (liar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ur too flirty for a study session!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

• tip : never keep him in the same room as u when u have work to do . keeps flirting . too much distraction .

• ratings : 200/10 . the additional 200 points is bcs hes too cute to say no....... god he rlly has u wrapped around his finger huh

[jangofctts]

(sorry for the format i think but this is loNG WTF IS WRONG W ME ITS INCOHERENT I'M LOCKIN MYSELF UP OFF TO HORNY JAIL I GO) deadass when you nd the boys are days away from being back on coruscant and on shore leave for a minute bc the general got some weird jedi shit to deal with is when u become peak Brat™ like it is so bad even the resident brat fuse can't keep up, the whole squad is screaming, and no one can stop u (yet) like you love teasing the boys but this is next level annoying like lets say max asks u to do something to help him get ready to fuck off for leave and ur just like no💕 i will cause problems on purpose))) he isn't happy and keeps asking while doing other work, realizes he's getting nowhere, and starts w the vague threats “you won’t like what happens if u keep this up” or “you really don't want to do this right now" but u finally do a few things to help before u leave to annoy void bc that man doesn't deal w enough shenanigans apparently...

u help void for a bit but get bored when void is just doing inventory and requisitions asking you how much of this or that nd you start saying "not enough" or "a fuckton" and while he appreciates the honesty it's not helpful but you ask "can't a droid do inventory? they know how to count?" getting a snarky reply of "yeah unlike you" obviously fed up but u continue to annoy him maybe cause mischief w the boys if they're there? maybe get handsy? threaten stupidity? who knows but anything u do is gonna get an exasperated sigh and "i'm gonna tell max about this shit" but what is he gonna do? punish u? [narrator: he, in fact does just that] so this goes on for a while but at some point when you are like 10 hrs out from coruscant max herds u to his quarters but lo and behold it's not bc he needs someone to fix his datapad but bc ur in for the punishment of ur life lol this man must have been planning this since ur first bratty act bc he has a bunch of stuff laid out just for u))) seeing this, u turn on the sad puppy eyes/pouty face and the "but i can be a good girl for u" or "i'm sorry i was just antsy to get back let me make it up to you" but nothing is gonna work now especially when he puts u over his knee.

he's pulling ur pants down over ur ass, revealing ur going commando today and u give him the "whats wrong maxy?" over ur shoulder just before he starts ur punishment isn't he sweet? he only spanks you a few times bc ur real punishment is SO MUCH worse and u realize this when he ties ur hands together over ur head and ties ur ankles together too hmmmmm this was more than u bargained for and u keep pleading with max when he takes his armor and blacks off but he keeps saying "u did this to yourself baby" and that he "can't help now" because "u didn't listen earlier like a good girl" but once he gets situated on the bed u know ur in for it. he grabbed some lube from his drawer and slicked himself up while telling u that "u won't be enjoying this part but i think i will" as he takes a hold of ur legs and lining himself up with not ur entrance but between ur thighs right above ur clit bc surprise! this ass and thigh man is gonna go to town fucking ur thighs while just grazing ur clit every few strokes absolutely working u up but no where near enough to get u off just like he planned. max really does love a good thigh fucking and so do u but he's usually playing with ur clit teasing u until he hits home and fills u up right - this time none of that is happening. u keep whining which just eggs him on more to bully u with "good girls deserve my thick cock but u decided to be a brat hm?" and "brats don't get to cum last time i checked" until he loses his rhythm and shutters as he cums all over ur stomach. he slowly gets out between ur thighs and runs his hands through the mess but ur still whiny so he shushes u with cum slick fingers before he gets up to grab his comlink just leaving the rest to get sticky (so rude)

he calls up void nd hear him say "my hip is acting up could u come look at it later?" with "did ur dumb ass do something again? give me a bit i'll head over" in reply with no idea what is waiting for him when he comes through the door. u have no idea how long it'll b until void comes so u keep trying to plead ur case to max telling him ur "sorry for being annoying and bratty i learned my lesson can i cum now?" but getting a surprising "lets see what void thinks" in return. its at least half an hour until void opens the door to see u tied to max's bed and him hovering over u just taunting and playing with u as he sees fit but honestly at this point nothing can really truly shock void now but this peaked his interest. max tries to explain saying "she was being a br-" "a brat i know i didn't think it would end up like this but" void starts as he takes off his remaining armor and ur begging for SOMETHING since max was so mean not even going near ur pussy (again rude) but thankfully void isn't a sadist (today) and starts teasing u by running his fingers through ur folds, playing with ur clit, and starts opening u up for him.

once he gets u good and wet he starts slowly rocking into u while u keep begging for him to give u permission to cum but he says that "brats don't get to cum they just get used))))" and ur thinkin ur definitely not gonna be cumming anytime soon but this mf just goes straight to pound town w the week/month/whatever he's had and the bratting u've done lol and u start clenching trying to get a rise out of him or get him to say something, ANYTHING but void won't give u the satisfaction of hearing his usual dirty talk, no, this is his version of punishment just letting u hear and feel him fuck u faster as he approaches his orgasm not caring about yours (yet) just feeling u tighten around him until he can't handle it and cums deep inside u just staying there for a minute catching his breath and u think void is done but oh lord no he is very much not lol he unties ur ankles and goes straight for ur pussy eating u out and cleaning up the mess he made inside and out, rutting into the sheets and making u squirm like nothing else maybe max wanders back over to you too and helps him out idk i was just having thots (since everyone is whore knee for wrecker rn i remember sending a wrecker ask a million years ago i can send it again if u want also i have a short fuse thing for u so))))) love being a whore)

ok bye im gonna be checking myself into the fuckin hospital THIS IS PURE GOLD IM

wOw

[iscarusholmes]

17 Questions, 17 People

i was tagged by the king of chaos @but-theres-wolves and can only aspire to writing something as fun to read as their post, but imma give it a shot anyways so buckle up bastards 

Nicknames:  my name was always two syllables so i never really had any need for one growing up, but most recently i, like many others, decided that gender was so not for me and decided to go by Percy.  My manager calls me ‘Perseus’ for fun (?), and i’ve always thought it was funny to have a nickname longer than my actual name so lowkey i hope it sticks lmao

Zodiac:  Libra, although i only know that so people would stop asking me when my birthday was so they could figure it out for me lol

Height:  5′6 ish

Hogwarts House:  (listen. listen listen. fuck jkr) Slytherin

Last Thing I Googled:  i was logging into google docs to write down some ideas for a story me and my friend are writing about our oc’s lol

Followers:  listen i’m not sure but i wanna say 7

Song stuck in my head:  Repeat After Me by KONGOS 

How much sleep: not enough lol

Lucky number:  i always say 7 but i wouldn’t consider it a lucky number by any means.

Dream job: *puts my hands on your face and pulls you close* i do not dream of labour.  i have no idea actually.  it would be nice to have something that doesn’t drain me and pays well and also gives me time to have a life outside of work. that is all

Wearing: sweatpants & a sweater i stole from a very high and mighty man who thought smoking from an apple was the most original idea in the world and had it coming.  plus it was hella comfy and it was a beautiful green color and had tiger on it from winnie the pooh. 

Favourite Song:  i have too many so im just gonna say rn i’ve been listenin to Black Dog by SAMURAI, Beggin by Maneskin, & the one i mentioned earlier, Repeat After Me by KONGOS

Favourite Instrument:  currently ?  the hurdy gurdy. obsessed

Aesthetic:  darker grunge-esque? sometimes it’s fancy and sometimes it’s hobo, depends on if im going to work or not lol

Favourite Author:  once upon a time i would’ve said Shakespeare cos his dirty jokes are *chefs kiss* but now idk.  been a while since i read anything 

Favourite Animal noise:  when my lil kitty mrrps the tiniest bit and then the bells on her collar jingle as she paps forwards towards me . that one is my fav forever and ever.  she’s never very vocal but we’ve both slowly been working to come out of our shells and now she’s learning to express herself more and when i come home from work she always is excited to greet me and ahh <3

Something random:  these questions are always my least fav (: i used to work at a doggy day care and they introduced a new dog to my yard that could jump Very High and had very long claws and she jumped up on me and tore off 99% of a mole i have on my side and when i finally got out of the yard i’d bled through my shirt in several places and ! when i quit, my boss required me to give back the uniform shirts. even the bloodstained one. lmfao 

tagging not very many ppl cos idk how many have done this before but w/e !!

@mildstiles @badmoon--rising @all-or-nothing-baby @giffex-art

EDIT: I WAS ALSO TAGGED BY THE WONDERFUL @teencopandthesourwolf AND JUST NOW SAW IT THANK U LOVELY DEAREST skdjlskdfj honoured.

[si-nging-ren]

*CRACKS KNUCKLES*

okay. ive decided im going to discontinue the jirou x reader fanfic "wrong number, my bad" for a number of reasons that i will get into in a bit. i have also, however, decided to create an smau for hawks (probably not, but who ive decided on for now) x reader, based on something more personal about me. the goal of the story being more personal is to give me a better layout for how it should continue on and the feelings can be more genuine than me making up stories on a whim and hoping they work. i will give out the plan for wnmb, however, so that anybody interested can still understand how the story wouldve ended.

now as for why im abandoning wnmb.

1. i dont feel the energy to write it anymore. i dont like where the story is going, and with my current mental state and status at school, i dont have the ability to start over or try again. i font have the ideas for the story and just dont vibe with it.

2. mental reasons. i can't stick to the schedule i made for the story as well as i used to be able to, and also personal mental health reasons that sort of keep me from doing so.

3. there are personal life reasons that cause this, but jirou has slowly evolved into somewhat of a discomfort character. i dont want to get into the reasons as to why, but i dont like her that much and bad memories come up whenever i try to sit with her in my head for too long.

thats really all for why i dont want to continue wnmb, but for anybody interested, here was the plan as to how the story was planned out (via notes):

- [x] yn and mina and ochaco do be talking doe

- [x] basically introductions

- [x] same with jirou baku toko yaomomo and denks

- [x] but THEN

- [x] yn and jirou talk :DDD

- [x] jirou basically says that theyre not annoying

- [x] yn says their typical clown shit

- [x] "aidjskjdh thanks you daddy 🥺"

- [x] jirou doesnt answer for a wholeass hour

- [x] "sorry had to go to church and clense from that sin"

- [x] "o-oh okay 😔 daddy doesnt love me"

- [x] "there are so many things wrong with that"

- [x] "😳😳😳"

- [x] "im starting to wish that i blocked you"

- [x] "nONONONONO IM SORRY"

- [x] "nyways what did you wanna talk about d-"

- [x] "......."

- [x] "arling :)))"

- [x] poor jirou just wanted to know about who they are

- [x] "name, hobby, talent, interests, whatever i just wanna know about you"

- [x] yn hops over to twitter all "omg theyre so sweet 🥺🥺🥺"

- [x] naturally ochaco and mina are all "fake bestie wtf are u talking about"

- [x] yn is laughing awkwardly and is just,,, "oh nothing 😳😳"

- [x] (nobody believes them)

- [x] then they ask about jirou but she has to give false info

- [x] except for her gender its fine if she says that

- [x] she hops over to the squad

- [x] panicking

- [x] "guys wtf i think i just committed a crime"

- [x] "nono youre fine what happened"

- [x] "i made a fake identity so the person who contacted me wouldnt know it was me"

- [x] "do they even know you???"

- [x] "YES they said they really liked our music and im PANICKING"

- [x] "okok calm down its not illegal or anything"

- [x] "i think"

- [x] "YOU T H I N K ? "

- [x] "yeah sorry :// but like you did this to yourself lmaooo"

- [x] jirou awkwardly hops back to yn

- [x] "yeah i think that band is pretty cool too im actually friends with some of them"

- [x] i mean its not false

- [x] ":ooo omg rlly?????? theyre so cool aaa 🥺🥺 maybe we can meet one day at one of their concerts 👉👈 jkjk...... unless 😳"

- [x] little did they know

- [x] LMAOO jk

- [x] kinda

- [ ] they end up talking for hoursss and mina and ochaco ask one day if they wanna hang out

- [ ] theyre all "hell yesss 🥴 where we goin??"

- [ ] a bar. they go to a fucking bar. (btw its to celebrate minas new job thingyyy)

- [ ] drink responsible kiddosss

- [ ] nyways afterwards she ends up talking to jirou bout how shes super nice and would love to be friends with her more

- [ ] jirou has gay panic tm

- [ ] like actually theyre rlly cute fuck

- [ ] yn asks if they can call since theyve never heard her voice or seen her

- [ ] jirous all ".....theyre drunk they wont recognize my voice"

- [ ] also shes rlly groggy since its TWO IN THE DAMN MORNING

- [ ] jirou calls her and yn asks if she wants to meet someday bby doesnt understand okay

- [ ] jirou panics and asks if they can get to know each other more first

- [ ] yn is hurt but understands and agrees

- [ ] yn asks to play 20 questions

- [ ] jirou asks if theyre a preteen jokingly

- [ ] yn whines and says its either that or a drinking game

- [ ] not wanting yn to drink anymore, she sighs and agrees

- [ ] she ends up finding out:

1. yn has a cat

2.

3. thats it, yn passed out

- [ ] jirou fell asleep on call later nd they didnt hang up until jirou woke up later and realized that awake yn would recognize her

- [ ] she quickly hung up and then sent them a good morning text

- [ ] bitches be playin

- [ ] but yn doesnt mind theyre a gay, dumb clown

- [ ] yn asks what minas job was since they never found out- god their dumb

- [ ] mina says its the typical teaching thing but its for ome of yns favorite bands

- [ ] "ooh, who are they?"

- [ ] "they said their name was blackbear! pretty sure youve talked about them some times before"

- [ ] "omygod mina you dont understnad if you could somehow find a way for me to find them i would literally marry u"

- [ ] "please dont. but ill try boo dw"

- [ ] she ends up doing it

- [ ] but inbetween then they end up getting rlly close like numerous calls and texts and learning more about each other until they realize they like her

- [ ] yn is super happy all "bro u guys are so awesome"

- [ ] bby girl is vibrating.

- [ ] LMAOO YOU WANNA KNOW JOWNTHEY FIND OUT

- [ ] THEY AND JIROU END UP BECOMING RLLY CLOSE LIKE THEY FRIENDSSSS

- [ ] AND SHE ASKS FOR THEIR NUMBER

- [ ] THEIR STILL JITTERY BTW SO THEYRE LIKE WOAH RLLY???? ID LOVE TO BRO

- [ ] AND JIROU PUTS HER NUMBER IN YNS PHONE AND SEES THE NAME "nd strikes" COME UP ND SHES LIKE "HUH MUST BE A GLITCH"

- [ ] BUT YNS ALL

- [ ] "HAHA SOMEONE NAMED "BBY" CAME UP WHEN I TYPED IN MY NUMBER I WONDER WHO THAT IS"

- [ ] "MAYBE I TYPED IT WRONG" CAUSE BBY IS DUMB

- [ ] MEANWHILE JIROU IS PANICKED CAUSE "HOLY FUCKING SHIT THEYRE BBY"

- [ ] SO SHE HANDS THEM THIER PHONE BACK AWKWARDLY AND YN SEES THEIR OLD MESSAGES AND PANICKS

- [ ] "HOLD UP IS STARS JIROU????? HAHHA NO IM BLIND AN D DUMB SURELY NOT"

- [ ] SO THEYRE LIKE "DID U EVER TELL ANYONE UR NAME IS STARS"

- [ ] AND JIROU JUST SIGHS AND IS CLEARLY IN PAIN AND IS JUST "YEAH THATS ME"

- [ ] ALL YN DOES IS LAUGH AND GO "YO THATS KINDA GAY"

- [ ] JIROU IS PAINED

- [ ] LIKE SHE THINKS THEIR GONNA HATE HER BUT????? NO??????????? SHES CONFUSED LMAOO

- [ ] yn blinks and realizes she should probably confess or smth

- [ ] "uhm, jirou?"

- [ ] "yeah whats up?"

- [ ] "aCTUALLY NVM ILL TELL YOU LATER-"

- [ ] later in a call they say it

- [ ] jirou is rlly smart and all but her first thought was "its cause of who i am. this happened immediately after."

- [ ] some part of her is screaming that its feelings and that she likes them back but she ignores it.

- [ ] like this has to be bad right???

- [ ] nyways jirou ghosts her like a clown and rants to the band b-wordssss gc

- [ ] yn cries to the babiest of the babies 🥺🥺🥺 gc

- [ ] yn asks if she just doesnt care about them now that shes seen them

- [ ] jirou realizes "wait fuck maybe im wrong"

- [ ] spoiler alert: she is

- [ ] she sort of goes "i didnt rlly think that you actually liked me actually

- [ ] yn starts crying

- [ ] (this is over call btw)

- [ ] "why tf wouldnt i?!"

- [ ] "bc you confessed right after you knew who i was"

- [ ] "istfg so our conversations just dont matter ig"

- [ ] jirou is confused

- [ ] like??? she gets that theyre mad but she does understand why so much

- [ ] "listen i just need to know if you like me back or not please. before i start crying again."

- [ ] she decided to not comment on how they were already crying

- [ ] "yes i like you okay"

- [ ] "do you actually?"

- [ ] "yes. istag that i actually like you and im not shitting u. if you want ill go there rn"

- [ ] ".....yes pls"

- [ ] "i need your address though"

- [ ] "oh yeah– its *address*"

- [ ] jirou arrives all nervous and shit

i didn't have anything planned out after that, but it was probably gonna be a kiss scene or something idk

[moonlightjeno]

ok but moots assigned to fanfiction tropes!!

ahh omg dear anon thank you so much for sending this in !! I’ve been wanting to do this lol.

I feel like this might be a tad long so it shall be under the cut <3 also not @ me realizing most of my moots ult jeno asdf.

alesha [ @sungiescorner ] |

hmmmm. my first thought was college jeno au buT idk why I’m getting grease vibes. SO HYUNJAE GREASE VIBES. Like the whole 90’s (is grease set in the 90’s idk lmao) vibe with retro. basically your it’s grease but the roles are reversed !! Instead of the Alesha being the exchange student hyunjae is bc hyunjae is a soft bean. And you’re part of the schools like higher socitey thing (this is making no sense yay). But basically you’re part of the more rebellious group of the school and then you had a summer fling with hyunjae, until he appears at your school the first day. And chaos unfolds. And just bc I think tutor au’s are cute af hyunjae needs help w math and low and behold you are there to help him :)

mother in law [ @danishmiilk ] |

hehhehe. Obv we gotta go with do young your husband, and lemme tell you all we talk about is blowing up buildings. So doyoung mafia au !! Basically dy is the brains of most of the operations and one day while planning for idk blow up an sm building (we’ve had lengthy convos about this lmao) que you. who is just a genius at setting up bombs, from there sparks fly and you two become a dynamic duo (chemistry puns anyone??).

kathy [ @flirtyhyuck ] |

kathy my bb. Due to your current theme and bc I’m always down for sum badboy college au :) I wanna say a bad boy hyuck au? But in a college setting. you two first meet by accident bc your friend is in a frat and you had to be part of a project together so you walk over to the dreams frat house only for hyuck to answer the door. Now batboy hyuck tends to not be caught off guard but it’s you the person he’s been secretly pinning for most of the year so he kinda panics and gets really red. No worries chenle is there to tease him. But you still have to get your project done (little do you know this is all part of mark, jeno and renjuns plan tp get haechan to finally talk to you). So you end up waiting at their house bc rennin is supposed to be there in like ten minute, boy doesn’t show up. bUT you just spend time with hyuck and he asks you out by the end of it. This got long :)

bean ree [ @rouiyan ] |

Ree, my sweet bean !! My first thought when it comes to you is college au’s lol because you so good and amazing at writing them !! buT we WERE TALkINg ABOUT ROYALTY AU’S !! So royalty au w jeno omg. okie dokey, so you are both royals kinda. it’s a little bit enemies to lovers au whereas the second oldest (brother being first) you aren’t allowed to reign so bc of tradition (bad tradition) you have to marry into royalty of sorts. introducing lee jeno son of the lee’s who though not the strongest country are known for their activities and just tourism because their country is beautiful. you are shipped off to nct country to spend some time with your future husband. Now you don’t really hate jeno but you hate the idea of being shipped off to marry hence those feelings causing hate and aggressions towards jeno who is just like trynna be a nice and understanding bean (like he doesn’t want this either, and he’d just broken up with his s/o ). Fast forward three months and you slowly come accustomed to the place, learning about its government, and jeno begins to also warm up to you. Though you still don’t talk too much it gets better and you bond over the internal struggles that both of you have and slowly start to develop feelings for each other. but you still wanna have a say so your families agree that you won’t just be married but that you’d have power in both kingdoms kinda like an ambassador and im gonna stop here bc this is very long im soRRY.

sunny [ @neocitybynight ] |

bc blonde hair jeno with an undercut made a cb for a solid day, it’s blonde jeno time. i think we’ve talked before how much we both love idol au! so you’re both part of sm, different groups but the company (look at it have one good idea (o_O) and has you and jeno collab for a rap duet (?). it’s the first time you’ve met each other, but like things just kinda click. sunny is like such a hard-working person and I feel like jeno too their both super determined so they’d get all their work done pretty quickly and then just kinda hang and talk about everything and anything. imma stop here or idk where this will go lol.

mylin [ @starlit-jeno ] |

mylin !! my queen !! Ik your in hibernation rn so pls remain in hibernation !! Base off that a cute lil just stay at home date with jeno or mingi idk either one you choose lmao. But just a super laidback like put on random movies that you talk over occasionally and make fun off but also kinda enjoy them bc even though their bad their also fun to watch and entratinging :) w lots of cuddles and hugs and random forehead kisses.

furou [ @astroboy-lele ] |

Now I’m basing this off your username and the fact that we talked about among us lmao. Less go. So space au! With chenle !! For some reason (idk why just go along with it) there have been people dying in the spaceship. So the space ship crew the adults decided to make an investigation but don’t include anyone that aren’t “adults” but chenle isn’t having it as one of the people who died was his cousin. Now you two have best friends for a really long time so naturally you support him. So you two along with bb jisung who dragged along much to his protest of this being too scary for him and because he knew that chenle was in love with you so no way was chenle letting him out of his sight. Lets just say romance blooms along the crime investigation.

cherries [ @riothae ] |

Janna likes to hurt me w jeno but I don’t blame her bc has been just ok. anyways, sports au with jeno !! im thinking dancer au !! You guys have an assignment for your choreo class and are assigned partners that specialize in a diff style than you do. Jeno gets high key nervous and stressed af bc a. He’s an introvert and is awkward around new people and b. Kinda has a small crush on you, well on your style of dancing :) so you two are paired up, lets say your majoring in contemporary/modern dance and he’s specializing in acro and hip-hop. overall it’s just a cute lil thing and because the project is a whole trimester long ( so like 3 months ) you guys get pretty close and right as you end your performance on the day you do it on front on the whole school the ending is like a twirl type thing, and umm he leans in or you lean it and boom.

elle [ @joh--pping ] |  

Elle !! She’s the sweetest angel ever !! So it only makes sense  for a Johnny holiday au !! it’s an established relationship and basically just a fluff of you two setting up decorations for the holidays, (idk if you celebrate xmas so ahh sorry) but like putting up a tree and lights, getting hot chocolate jamming out to xmas music. I can see Johnny trying to get you to slow dance like even during a hype xmas song and it being very cute and intimate only for him to just start like jumping up and down right before you kiss. Anyways it would be filled with cuteness and fluff and stolen kisses and occasionally taking care of mark or jae.

[brewing-mischief]

You know I'd really like to read a deh fanfiction where Connor and Evan run into each other really hard, get knocked unconscious by the force and then wake up in the hospital in each other's bodies.

The doctor's say they both have amnesia since they're all "who are you people" to their 'families' and cant seem to remember their names.

"What's your name"

"Evan...Hansen?

"Evan is fine, he came in with you and is talking to a doctor right now. What is YOUR name?"

"Ummm....?????"

The boys figure out they switched bodies but dont say anything to avoid looking more crazy to their families. I think itd be cool to read about how both of them get a little taste of what they need.

Connor gets to go to therapy (Dr.S is assuming that the amnesia is the reason Evan has gained a different personality. Thinking that since he has forgotten his trama his brain has built a new personality off of different core memories creating an Evan that is less full of anxiety? Idk I'm not a psychologist. Im thinking later Connor would slip up revelling to much of his actual life which leads Dr.S to believe that Evan has DID and that Connor is a new personality formed from the incident. He would think Connor's memories are actually a creation of a world Evan would have liked. His parents still being together-even though he knows it wouldn't work out in the long run which caused the 'dream' to go dark. Connor is like "I have no idea what you're talking about but if your chill with dealing with me I'm good" Dr.S continues to treat Connor as though 'Evan's fantasy' AKA Connor's real life is reality because he believes that this 'fantasy' is holding Evan dormant.) <- [This of course is just DR.S's psychological interpretation. Realty is that its just a bodyswap. However if you like that theory of Connor actually being a personality of Evan go right ahead a write that. I'm not stopping you]

Connor also gets to eat normal food like Pizza and tacos and anything that isnt some weird Vegan fat-free mess Cynthia makes

Connor gets he's space. Hes not constantly beaten down on by his parents for every step he takes. Heidi is incredibly chill. She's very worried about his well being but shes not invasive like his parents are who just want to tear him down. She continues to reiterate that she loves and supports him which allows Connor to slowly drop his walls.

With these supports in place Connor slowly begins to stop smoking/cutting (I have a feeling he may have also stopped at the begining because he respects the fact that this isnt his body and doesnt want to damage it but it is HARD) however most of his needs to cut/smoke are in his head. Which is awful because addiction is hard to quit. But he doesnt have to deal with physical withdrawal symptoms. (Headaches, nausea ect.) Which helps

Connor also stands up to Jared real quick so Jared learns to get his priorities straight or he finds himself left behind

Evan on the other hand has a whole family unit. He finally gets attention 24/7 which is great. Larry is a little harsh with him because hes Connor but it's less than usually since 'Connor' has no idea what hes talking about and doesnt give him a fight anymore. Cynthia is constantly hovering over him with scrapbooks to jog his memory. Zoe just tries to keep her distance but shes always in the background just staring at him trying to figure him out. The whole family is serriously just thrown off about how nice/figitty 'Connor' is. He's tripping over his words and apologizing as much as he breathes.

Evan does go through Connor's physical withdrawal because Evan is not about smoking. He suffers. The first day he keeps craving something but doesnt know what. He tells Cybthia who tries to help him match/satisfy it but nothing works. The next couple of dayd hes serriously sick/agitated. That's when Larry realised 'Connor' is going through withdrawls and is like "oh wow. Ok" and he starts being nicer. He is still somewhat stuck in the "what does it matter, Connor is going to go back to normal soon enough and it wont matter what he does right now" but Evan is being the perfect son so he cant really stay angry. He actually begins to bond with him again.

Evan just gets attention. He gets to sit down and have dinner and talk with people. He gets that family support hes been craving. He doesnt have to worry about being a financial burden because the Murphys are loaded

Evan would probably try to get close to Zoe but she pushes him away like nobody's business. Eventually she would cave and mabye do his nails or something but something about it feels off. Connor likes doing his nails and rn 'Connor ' seems to be very against the idea because "nail polish is for girls, what if people see it and think I'm a freak ect." So now shes even more suspicious about this whole amnesia thing. It wouldn't change her brother this much, would it?

Idk how Evan would think about everyone at school. Because they see him, they notice his existence but it's mostly out of fear and hatred. I feel like that would leave him a little bit panicked.

Anyway, after a week or two Connor goes over to his house to visit Evan and see how everything is being managed. Zoe sneaks a peek on them and notices something. Shes met Evan once or twice before so she didnt really make the connection until now when she can see them both. But 'Connor' is behaving like Evan, and 'Evan' is acting like Connor. Something is definitely off. She confronts them and without much of an argument to steer her off course they eventually give in and tell her what has been going on. She joins their team of figuring out what happened, how to go back and later in the story where the climax drama happens IF they should go back.

The IF drama is basically both parties know they have to go back but also dont want to....

It's just, Connor likes the freedom and trust Heidi gives him. He misses his sister but he also whitnessed his parents loving Evan more than they ever did to him. And that makes him furious because that means he was/will never be good enough for them. He takes this out on Evan since he knows Evan likes his family. He feels like Evan stole them from him even though he knows that's not true.

Evan wants his mom back. When he goes to visit 'Evan' hes a complete stranger to her and that hurts like hell. Plus He doesnt like being hated at school and furthermore he needs his therapy again. But the Murphy family is just so perfect. He has a father figure and a Mom whose always around and Zoe (who has become less of a crush through the experience and more a friend) and he doesnt have to listen to Jared being mean to him/claim they only hang out for car insurance. He has a strong support unit here and hes become more confident from the love they feed him.

So it's just this complicated mess of emotions.

I dont know how it would wrap up since they both have to go back but I think itd be really great to see these boys get better because their circumstances/situations switch. After all Tragedy is only a tragedy becuase the hero is in the wrong story. (I think I read that in a post talking about how Macbeth and Hamelt would have ended happily if only the two main characters were in each others stories since Macbeth would have killed the uncle real quick well Hamelt would have stopped to think instead of jumping in feet first. They made a good point and I want to apply that theory to this story)

Anyway those are my thoughts. Tag me if you write it

[malecftw]

Distractions

A/n: so this was an idea I’d been playing with for a while. It’d been sitting in my drafts for like a month and rn I was just feeling best friends to lovers, a slow cute fic sooooo that’s what came out lol tadaaa. I’ve never really written for David or the Vlog Squad before but let me know if you liked this, maybe I’ll write more in the future. Hope you like it :)

Word count: 1814

Warnings: Idk if Jeff being rejected counts as a warning but here we are, I mentioned the word vagina and idk why but in the context it seemed weird but also okay so yh lmfao y am i acting like im 12

Masterlist.

The LA air was soft and warm, making a strand of hair fall out of your loose bun and tickle your cheek. LA seemed quiet at this time of day, the sun was beginning to set, golden hour was upon you. Lana Del Rey was playing on the background, her deep, soft voice flowing out into the crisp summer air through the open windows. The smell of food made it’s way into your nose, your stomach beginning to rumble at the thought of dinner. Heath, Scott, and Jeff were having a beer at the barbecue whilst Jason was grilling the various types of meat. Kristen, Mariah, Carly, Erin, and Corinna were setting out white plastic chairs in a circle on the grass. Rosé was being spilled, laughs were had and a carefree feeling overtook you.

You still couldn’t believe this was your life. You were living in one of the most famous, loved places on earth surrounded by good friends who were always looking out for you.  Your daydream was cut short when you got nudged in the side. Your head turned around to see Zane standing next to you, leaning on the glass just like you were. “What’s up?” “Not much.” He nodded and directed his eyes to the skyline of LA. “So when are you going to tell him?” He asked, not taking his eyes off of the beautiful view before you. “Probably never.” Your nails clicked slightly against your plastic cup, preferring a soft drink before having a glass of wine with dinner. “Why are you so hesitant. You’re perfect for each other.” You shrugged, being uncharacteristically comfortable with the topic around Zane. “I don’t know. I’ve been flirting with Jeff. I’m just going to look like a slut if I fess up now.” He clicked his tongue at your answer. “Please y/n. You were never in a committed relationship with Jeff. Hell, you never even kissed. He’ll get over it. And we know you, none of us would ever put your name and the word slut in the same sentence.”

A sigh escaped your mouth yet you didn’t have a chance to reply when Heath called out to Zane. He quickly squeezed your arm in comfort before heading over to the boys near the barbecue. You pushed yourself off of the glass and made your way inside. Enough with the overthinking, it was time to make yourself useful. “Nat, can I help?” Natalie looked up at you, pausing mixing the dressing and the salad for a second. “Sure y/n. Could you bring this over to the yard, just put it on the table.” She said with a smile and pushed the salad bowl into your hands. You just nodded and did what she asked. The notification sound of your phone distracted you as you set the bowl on the table and while you quickly replied you felt an arm being swung over your shoulder. “What’s up y/n? Why so quiet?” Jeff said, a silly smile on his face as his eyes screened over your expression. “Not now Jeff.” You shrugged off his arm and started walking away when he grabbed your arm, concerned for your obvious distress. “Hey what’s wrong?”

“Is everything okay here guys?” David walked up, noticing your tense figure and Jeff’s already apologetic one. He didn’t even know what was wrong but was already stressed thinking he was the cause. You looked back and forth between the two guys. Life was playing another trick on you and frankly, you were sick of it. Why couldn’t you just go for the obvious choice? You had a beautiful man right in front of you willing to take things to the next level but no. Instead, you had to fall for the one dude that wouldn’t notice an eager vagina if it slapped him across the face. 

As you were having this inner dialogue with yourself the two guys still looked at you, confused by your off behavior. “Nothing is okay David, just leave me alone.” You headed for the living room and David took your words like a man. “What the fuck did I do?” He shouted as he ran after you. “Nothing. That’s the problem.”

“Wait what? Y/n what the fuck?” Of course, he didn’t get it. You hadn’t made a move since you were too busy distracting yourself with Jeff. “I just... Just... Just drop it okay. It’s about me, myself and I don’t worry about it.” “Sure doesn’t sound like it.” You rolled your eyes but were secretly grateful for everyone staying outside to give you some privacy. You even notice Nat sneak out of the kitchen, feeling the uncomfortable switch in the room when you walked in.

“Y/n. Just talk to me. Remember that time when you accidentally spilled glue in my hair and we had to shave my head? Didn’t snitch on you then. I looked like a bald man child. I still didn’t snitch. And let me tell you, it wasn’t a look.” David said in a cute attempt to make you feel better. “Of course you didn’t snitch. It was your own fault. Who the hell decided to smack my hands with their head while I was holding an opened bottle of kids glue.” “I’m sorry I forgot to turn on my spidey sense, else I would’ve known you were standing right behind me before I stood up.” “It’s not my fault you were shorter than me.” David placed his hands over his heart, jokingly looking offended. “Ouch.” He teasingly took a couple of steps closer to you causing him to tower over you. “Not anymore though. Now you’re tiny.” You look up at him, arms crossed, confused and annoyed by your feelings for the big man child in front of you. “Now, tiny, are you actually gonna tell me what’s up or am I going to have to keep you hostage until you do?

A pressed sigh leaves your lips. Now or never. His expression turns more serious when he sees your big eyes gloss over. “Hey whatever it is, we can work it out. You and me.” “I’m not so sure about that.” “Well I am.” “I just don’t want to mess things up between us. You’re my best friend.” David immediately knew where this was going and a wide smile formed on his lips. “And?” He said teasingly, eager for the moment in which you’d fess up the same thing he’d been feeling for a while now. “Ugh David you’re a pain.” You say as you softly poke his stomach with your index fingers. “But am I going to be your pain?” His voice has turned hoarse, excited yet on edge. He never dreamed of going there with you. He never had those feelings for you. Until one day, he started seeing you in a different light. He couldn’t pinpoint one moment, it just slowly happened. At first he’d thought it was a silly random idea his mind for some reason made up, but he couldn’t help but think about it from time to time. Then he started getting used to the idea of you two together. It grew on him. Suddenly it didn’t seem weird, it didn’t seem awkward. It just seemed right. But then you’d started flirting with Jeff and David knew he had no chance.

Until now.

You swallowed loudly, your hands pausing, staying put on his sides. “If you want to be.” He nodded slightly, it was the only answer he needed before leaning in. He paused, needing your permission. He needed to know this was it. That this was something you both chose. You slightly pressed your fingers into the clothed skin of his sides, allowing him to connect your lips. It’s wasn’t earth-shattering, it wasn’t filled with sparks and fireworks. It was sweet, soft and gentle. It was what you both wanted. Needed. It wasn’t filled with sexual desire or incredible passion. It was the confirmation you’d both been waiting for. You’d found your person. Ironically enough, he’d been there all along. Love was a big word, you’d known you loved David for as long as you could remember. But back then, you loved him as your best friend.

You both pulled away smiling like idiots. You could see the love and happiness on his face, but he also looked pensive. “So what about Jeff?” You nodded. Of course, it looked really bad. “I like Jeff. I thought I could learn to love him. I needed to learn to love him. I was still waiting for the click in my brain, but it never happened which is why I never took it to the next level. It wouldn’t have been fair to him. He deserves better than a girl whose heart isn’t really in it.”

David’s eyes moved from you to something behind you so you turned around. Of course, like in any other predictable movie or show, Jeff was stood right there, leaning against the window frame. Your mouth fell open, You wouldn’t blame him if he was angry even if he didn’t seem that way right now. “Don’t worry about it y/n. It’s okay.” His thick New York accent filled the room. In a few big steps, he was stood right in front of you, looking to David quickly before grinning. His arms wrapped around your neck and kept you in a playful headlock, messing up your hair as he laughed. “You respected me enough to not go there with me. I appreciate that. At least now I still get to tease you and prank you. David’s lost those privileges.” Relief washed over you. This was the most drama-free ending to this situation you never thought you’d get. 

David put his hands in the air, looking happy and relieved as well that things went as smooth as they did cause let’s face it,... They rarely do. “Hey, as long as I get to film it that’s cool.” He said laughing and you smacked his chest. Jeff let go of you and shot you and David a smile before joining the others in the backyard. David sighed as he took you in his arms, looking down at you before bringing both of your attention to your intertwined fingers. “You ready baby?” He asked, voice high and excited to show off what had been his for the longest time but never really realized until now. You nodded and slowly made your way into the backyard. Jeff probably already told everyone since not a single soul seemed to question what had happened.  “Yes, baby girl you finally did it!” Zane shouted, holding up his beer and everyone cheered.

The smiles on each one of their faces only made it more clear to you.

This had never been a matter of if. 

This had been a matter of when.

[transphormers]

hey u have an hc or something about idw mirage becoming a therapist right bc i was thinking about it at work

I do :0!  It’sall a bit messy & not too specific cause tbh... I’ve barely worked on thisidea (and also I had to write this on my phone, rip) but uuuuh here it is:

(Some basics before I really get into it: Mirage hasn’t been killed in thisAU obvs, no Unicron either. The Lost Light’s adventure ends mostly like it doesin canon afawk (the finding of “cyberutopia”, showdown with getaway, defeatingfunctionist universe council etc), and afterwards everyone returns to Cybertronbefore going their own way) So:

Like I said, Mirage returns to Cybertron with the rest of the crew. 

The trip back is way less eventfull than the adventure itself, and everyoneis quite grateful for it. Problem is, it is kinda boring, and betweenrunning the lost light’s sophisticated gay bar Visages andsome other menial tasks Mirage has a lot of time to think about his future.

He is not gonna go back to being a Noble™. In part because he doesn’t thinknobles and noble society will be a Thing like they were in the past (at leastnot right after the war), but mostly because he doesn’t think he would be happyamong them anymore. He has just changed too much since the start of the war,and he knows he just wouldn’t be able to put himself thru the whole ordeal thatis being a Good Noble™

Related but unrelated to this: I’ve always thought of Mirage as someone whonever really fit in with the other Nobles (or the Autobors, but that’s anotherstory altogether) and wasn’t very happy among them, but What Else could he do.

So anyway. Being a noble is off the table, plus he would like to actuallydo something for others and society as a whole this time. But... what? Gonnakeep this short but basically he spends 90% of the trip back home just tryingto come up with an aswer.

And it’s not easy? like?? at all???? he’s been thinking for days, making alist of the things he Knows how to do or could learn quickly and how he coulduse them to help, but he doesn’t like any of the things he comes up with? Soafter the brainstorm comes the depression.

Luckily for him he’s now in good terms with a lot more people than he wasso when they (and by they I mean the Protectobots) notice that he’s going thrua rough patch they decide to help him out. It’s not easy but them being therefor him already helps quite a lot, and then one day by mere coincidence thesubject of therapy comes up.

And it’s like the sky has opened and Primus himself has pointed at Mirageand told him that That’s His Calling! That’s What He Should Do!

(Then comes another little period of desesperation cause ok. he knows whathe would like to do. but... how does he get there? what if he cant? and what ifit turns out to not really be his thing and what if what if what if!!! But hegets thru it)

They arrive at Cybertron and thank primus! there’s a new academy/universityin Iacon looking for students (and teachers) to try and reactivate the planet’sacademical and (part of) cultural spheres! So Mirage find little to noresistance to him enrolling as a psychology student and later focus most of hiswork and research on ptsd (I dont actually know anything about psychology soidk is thats? a thing they can do but shhh lets pretend)

(Actually getting his degree and license to practise is a long and hardproccess withs lots of ups and downs and there are so many moments where Miragejust wants to give up, but he persists and it pays off in the end and its sucha cathartic moment for him? I cant properly express myself rn but basically:!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) (also he spends a whole day crying and his friends haveso much blackmail material? all in good humour tho but still.)

He starts working under one of his teachers and then moves to a littlemedical practice in Iacon which offers a lot of free treatments and services(First Aid also works here and? the other doctor the protectobots have? im surethere was one?? he’s here too). The pay is not amazing but it’s enough to liveso he really wont complian (and he wont say this outloud casuse he doesnt likebeing cheesy, but for him there’s no better payment that watch his patientsslowly get better)

It’s not all good tho. There are still ups and downs and he’s still dealingwith his own issues and if he has to be honest, the bad days may be less andless usual as time goes by, but the bad days he has are so bad he really feelslike giving up sometimes.

But as much as i love angst and drama i love happy endings more so he getsthru it! sometimes on his own sometimes relaying on others but he is so muchhealthier (mentally and physically than he was) and so much happier, he reallywouldn’t change his life for anything

[misterbitches]

@flootweed ​

ATOTS

That's super fucking romantic? Like tragic but in a nice way. i love that shit. i'm a monogamous slut for romance pghiosuag even tho we have to learn to live alone too but it's just like the NOTION is nice?!??! awwww i told my mom that SOPHIE's gf was like "she died taking a picture of the moon" and how it was like idk. the gf was just processing it and she thought it was romantic and my mom was like "wow.....depressing" bc think she thought it was stupid millenial shit i was like no mother doent u see she died in the BEAUTY LMAO but then i told her jessica walter's husband died the year before and then she died and she was like "aw...kind of romantic" LMAOOOO i guess two people have to die. why did i tell this story? i am so sorry. the show ended today right (ep 10?) i didn't realize it was that short. so i hope it was a happy ending? (tell me) i understand why you love the atmos! it's like, not really been done. there's this BL that i hear isn't too great but it does take place in a rural part of thailand and there's way less budget. a lot of ppl seem to like it. ep 6 LW / LW in gen gotta be honest, rushed through it. i knew spoilers from jump cause BL spoilers are just absolutely nothing and sometimes ur just like i need to know. i do not understand the ~silently lookin 4 u~ trope it always backfires and is also DUMB. so happy about tiffy. a girl who likes girls but ends up with a man bc of mommy and also the man is ok....it's me. she's gorgeous and actually [h*lf] gay so it's great. god ok i feel so old again. lmaooo but i was like obsessed with lady gaga for that reason (dont ask...also how i got kinda popular on tumblr way back in the day) and shes just absolutely fucking beautiful and bad ass. (which kind of doesnt helpcos they r all skinnty but that's FINEEEE) right? i mean like i guess cos we knew abt it? i can see why he was so pissed off, too? i mean i'm so fucking like...sensitive to being told what to do so i was angry for him from jump. i guess i was also looking at it different wholetime cos i knew the spoilers? i'm assuming u did too lmao. so we knew hed be pissed and leave. and frankly that's what sib gets. just for you my friend i will watch it and update. i think MANY times in shows in gen but it is something you notice a lot in BL bc they are just absolute novices most times. in this case, gene's actor mostly well (and i like him as a person just cos he was on that thai 3 girls in a car show and used to date on eof them lmao) can act so i will look over that scene to see how sib's actor plays off him. but the pausing in between sentences or for so long even decent actors or actors doing better. kao is not bad, not great so they will talk slowly because dramatic acting but the problem is most times it's too long. even if the person is an adept actor it won't always work and YES THEN THAT MEANS THE EDITOR COMES IN AND SNIP SNIP SNIP! it's too long. and sometimes it just does not work even if you can act. but it is GLARING when they cant or are average (someoe said this about tharntype and my god lmao tharn..is...so...slow...in...talking...the actor idk his name it's one of em, the other one with the nose (type) is....different not better but he certainly does not talk as slow. they arent bad but they are not good so.) also sometimes they are forgetting their lines. some ppl find this charming. clearly we do not lmao. what is their relation? what is going on there? i don't have a problem with stepbrothers as long as they didn't grow up with that sibling bond. many times blended families really have to watch out for that kind of fraternizing but it's always when theyre older and teenagers bc they didnt grow up w/ each other....i mean they have chemistry so i'm whatever. but. hennYYWAYYYS.actually it's bc im an idiot i didn't read it as Mhok (singular) and aey's father. Yes and his sister who i think i may hate? im like bitch okkkkkk but. his name is lhong. and he is a psycho. i mean so is type. so. oooh it could be that he stole! but also i'm pretty sure cos hes gay lol or did they

not make that explicit? the thing is i had to skip through most of that scene too because the drama was WAY too much for me. too much. lmao. the sister thing i got and it made sense and iliked that. oh yea he is gay and they know. that's a big one.

WBL

haven’t watched color rush! did you like it? i have seen wyel, parts of mr heart, and ofc to my star :) 

ohhhhhh ok. i get you. yea he definitely wasn’t being ooc cos i think that....what u said. and also like....ugh i cant even think rn. i like sam lin a lot so i like gao shi de but i gotta say. lmao. hm. first of all. yes it is creepy what he did. it’s fucking weird. and sad that his whole life revolves around him. it’s not as fucking weird as LW but still like when he did the door thing. i was like UMMMMMMMMM cos i really didnt want it to be constructed. and when it was i was like imma suspend my disbelief. but if anyone dared...

and so what he did in s2 i think he just couldnt realize that he was loved back which is why it’s good he WAS ALONE for 5 yrs imo. but he gave shu yi 0 choice and for that i am pretty sure i would be even angrier. i do think though that the father’s role is pretty important but i can see how the show is like....letting that go? bc as fucking weird as GSD is, he was still like...20? i guess and shu yi’s dad is like. crazy? i am also like he really had to fucking start a company to get noticed like are u joking? is it also that easy? and also why? lmao i just. ugh. i think that probs bothered me the most...priorities.

i like the show! well idk if i love it but sure. i think it’s decent lmao. i understand what you’re saying. for here it bothers me less but i certainly don’t think it was OOC. immature and stupid but like...that’s.....what they are. i also don’t have a problm with the timing from a technical point.

however, when i started the show? i had NO clue what concept of time it was. and that was very annoying. tehy redeemed it bc of the comedy aspects (the first time shu yi sees shi de is so fucking good, i really loved the shot and editing; it’s hilarious and silly) and i started to go with the flow of the show through that. but the fucking concept of time in the show in general esp with repetitive outfits (i understand that they are more likely to wear multiple outfits as well, it’s just that you have to split it up or it i sconfusing visually and looks like the same scene twice or just a full day of shooting which it could be but then something should change in the clothes. this is just an ex~~*~*) and partof that is they have this already controlled narrative i guess. 

i have to admit as well...i skipped episode 1. and most of 2. i was like i rly dont want to see someone slap a pereson even if they were like. not together. it’s just not cute also not in front of ppl. and then when they were yelling and bla bla i was like listen ladies lets calm down. too much angst in a boring way. what they have now is good. also they should probably like estrange the father but i doubt they will. 

i cannot make up my mind totally now bc i see what ur saying i guess i just don’t feel that way as much but i guess i have to think about it more, too. i do think he was contorlling in getting him or like when he didnt want shu yi to find out whwatshisface liked him. i guess for me it would be if he is still that way in the rship. but even tho he’s at fault for what happened, i’m also like but his dad? but also like...did he try? why did he just stop contacting? but then i guess he emailed everyday? DO U C MY QUANDARY.

alsoi have to say i do not care abt their backdoor being opened lmao like wow business? no thanks

LMAO. did they cry a lot in UWMA? i only know the teamwin parts. which one is fluke the really pale one who died? idk what it is about that kid but i just cant watch him. it’s not his fault it’s mine.

DUDE i still dont understand the husband and wife thing and ive looked into it multiple times. ive kinda just classified it as one of those things that make me uncomfortable but arent problematic lol. it you have any insight about it id love to hear it tho !!

it’s stupid. that’s what it is (husband and wife.) it’s just something they say like many gay couples may use pejoratives in conjunction with them, the f word etc. or even imply something about being a top and a bottom. whatever. but these arent gay spaces or gay storylines. sure gay men may direct them but since BL operates and relies on patriarchy without a doubt and also stereotypes poorly kathoeys or won’t cast trans women in anything substantial and use them as jokes (and see this is one of those things where it’s like...ud never see this in the US tho like our concept of third gender or kathoeys but life stillBOOOOO.) so it’s just useless when they put it into the scripts because it’s for people to consume and lots of girls are. obviously. so the idea that if you are being penetrated and u r the wife and this is used like literally anywhere but not from gay or whatever men is gross. are cis women’s vaginas sieves to them? are trans women not women? do we have to categorize people by PHALLIC OBJECTS IN OUR BODIES SPECIFICALLY A WOMAN? it dont make no sense. plus really most ppl just experiment, there’s more ways than one to have sex, we have lives so most times it’s not just full penetration for hours anyway. it’s just so gross. like oh that’s really funny lol ur the wife cos his dick goes in ur butt XD i get it, same. i say “i’m wife’ whenever there’s a penis in me. fucking kill me. it’s not a big deal but it’s just dumb and gross. if they use it they could try and subvert it too like i like how my engineer has  a whole absurdly stupid episode about it. but in TT the dad says “if ur the wife i wont accept it” and i was like u know what gals? im good. goodbye.

pgojaihousgajigko THAT’S SOOOOOOO OOWIEOFUGHOIJ WEIRD. FANDOM IS REALLY WEIRD. i have read rpf and written it once upon a time but dont do it anymore  uch. i mean it’s weird. no doubt about that. invasive, weird, strange. but very unreal anyway. it is. plus i dont like celebs or fame and think of it as a gross capitalist scheme so i had to stop (also so weird?) but i know very many people like lean in. lean in. LEAN IN. this youtuber i watch did a video on like insanely popular ships (like that 1d one) and their insane fandoms and i just couldnt. it’s so embarrassing? and then they’re so bold????? about it? 

yea it would be cool (more queer men or visibly we should say or like out whatever.) but it doesnt necessarily mean that will be good or beneficial i guess? i mean like. i dont know. so much about the genre is about wish fulfilment for young girls. its literally selling some fantasies because the other thing is for BL (i read a paper on this...) esp for girls in more conservative societies they cna maybe replace themselves in the character? but they may not feel a threat as a woman or like their life will fall apart if they engage in sexual things with anyone really. and that’s where i’m like....for a lot of these are they just writing a story and just replacing two men? bc they also seem to think it owrks like that. and in a way that’s what it is bc of the writing and how they use certain terms. you can tell the piece is about pushing a product and less about the real affects of a story. i think ITSAY is a great example of a really intelligent great piece of work that contains multitudes. and the girl was amazing. it just depends on the goal. and for most of the ppl the goal isnt...to do anything. so i dont know. idk how to talk abt representation anymore. it both is and isnt.

 i really liked tingting from my engineer a lot (idk if u have seen) she’s so fun and unapologetic. i love how much she drinks and if someone tells her to be ladylike she says no. and i appreciate that in the show when girls were rude to her she said nothing about the girls but said “NO IM NOT LUCKY TO HAVE ALL MALE FRIENDS?” i really want to see her more in the next season. obviously tiffy is goat. super excited to see how their rship develops.

[bentflowers]

07.06.19

12:51 AM: Hi there. It's been a really long time since i last vented on here. well it's time to update this. idk where to start. a lot has happened. i guess the biggest thing is that i'm more in love than ever. i'm so fucking happy with al**. he makes me happier than ever and i've been feeling happier with myself too. i can't believe im slowly learning to love myself. it's working!!! also this month on the 11th is gonna be al**'s and mine ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY!!! that's so fucking crazy. i met his family a long ass time ago and now he's met my family too !!! he's such a dork and i love him so much. like recently ive been having some off days and he does the best job at comforting me. he lets me say whatever whenever and he never judges me. he protects me whenever he can. i love him. and like idk. he does everything so right. he drives me crazy in a good way. sometimes he frustrates me but we always make up immediately. he listens to me. like he actually listens and it makes me so happy. our communication is like 12/10. no matter what we always talk to each other. i always hesitate to tell him things but he always makes me feel better that i did tell him if that makes sense. like a while ago when om** came over to visit the city, we hung out and stuff but at night things got bad. i spent the night at his hotel room because we had done that before and nothing ever happened. but this time stuff did happen. and i felt so guilty over what happened. i felt like it was all my fault and i was scared to tell al**. i seriously thought that he would leave me for it.. but even tho i was super afraid i wanted him to know. so i told him about how om** had touched me while i was half asleep and stuff and how guilty i felt for trusting someone.. and how guilty i felt for cheating and stuff but al** just cried with me and told me it wasn't my fault. i never wanted to do those things and it really pains me to say that i was assaulted by someone i trusted. i realize now that it wasn't my fault. i trusted him and he broke that trust. i still feel dirty from it but i'm slowly learning to cope with it and i'm trying to recover. al** reassured me that it wasn't my fault and that he still loved me and that he wouldn't leave me over it. and then i proceeded to tell him that i had been r*ped before and he cried with me. it's still really hard for me to talk about but he makes it easier. he's helped me to open up that chapter of my life that i so desperately tried to rip out. it's so bloody difficult but i'm learning to cope with it. i really am. im so happy that i was able to trust al** with this huge part of my life. he's helped me realize that these things aren't my fault and that i'll be okay. he promised to protect me from now on. he really is my knight in shining armor. there's just so much im trying to unwrap one day at a time. he's helped me so much and he doesn't even know but i hope that one day i have the courage to tell him or at least to show him my blogs where ive written all my feelings. i want to show my whole life to him but not until i know we're both ready. god i love him so much. he's my whole fucking world. it's strange to think that a few years ago i wouldn't dare to touch the subject with my ex bf but now i've done it with my current bf. al** is so fucking special to me. i can't keep hiding around him. i want him to know everything. i want him to know everything i've been through and i want to know everything he's been through. i want to protect and support him every step of the way. i love him so much. i miss him rn. i can't wait to see him again. ive been having crazy ideas about marriage. i wonder if this incredibly deep feeling will last. i remember feeling it with t** but it quickly faded. i remember feeling it at first and loving it but once he betrayed my trust, it started fading. then the thought of marriage didn't feel like a dream come true it just felt like something else we wanted to do just for the hell of it. like to just cross it off our bucket list. but now with al** it feels so fucking magical. (1/?)