#idk if someone made this joke before but i think i saw only a gay meth version soooo

[spghtrbry]

happy pride month

[loverboyfae]

i notice frequently this rhetoric of white people mocking other white people for their political involvement/racial politics/sjw behavior (outdated term i know but i have been seeing this attitude for a long time) that amounts to creating basically an anti-strawman? in essence it’s like. there are these white people getting up in arms about racial issues that no person of color actually cares about. no real person of color cares about racist jokes, that’s just sensitive white people. no real people of color (pre-2020) are advocating THAT strongly against the police, that’s just sensitive white people. as a result, i don’t have to do anything about these issues because they’re all being entirely made up by white savior types who all of us hate. (side note: I also used to see this rhetoric with a LOT of other issues like how sjw girls are campaigning against homophobia towards gay men that gay men don’t care about, or for trans people that trans people don’t care about, or for disabled people etc., but i feel like it only really still survives in racial politics)

i think about this often, but i’m especially thinking about an experience i had recently that made it so actually visible to me how much of a lie it is. my campus had an encampment and there was a lot of social media presence saying how everyone there was just rich and privileged white people who could afford to play pretend at protesting and have never had to be scared of the cops in their lives. and i saw how, while there was still a majority of white people because that’s the make up of my school, there was a HIGH percentage of students of color, of Black students, of Muslim students; way higher than i have seen in just a headcount of my classes. and they were bringing with them writings from authors of color and learnings from histories of other protests which they had also been arrested at. i knew people there personally who i know are not just well off kids who can afford whatever happens to them. people WERE making sacrifices doing stuff that can enact change that helps palestinians. there were palestinians there!!!

idk. it’s just very common and very suspect rhetoric and it boggles me that people still use it. tldr: if someone is taking you that an issue affecting marginalized people is only being advocated about by those who are not, question why they only hear it from the people not being harmed before you dismiss the issue. people may not feel safe around them, or they may be willfully manipulating the facts

[asmogorna]

Okay so there’s this ww artist on ig called like tooth lilys or something and he’s always causing drama in the ww fandom and he mouthed off about your art and now heaps of insta ww fans are like talking about you :| free publicity?

ahhhh so thats whats happening .. lmao thats crazy

i checked out their story, and i sure doooo love how they leave some things out when talking about both situations that they mentioned to make me look worse ..

ok so

warning, yap session incoming

the "will wood in a (miku) binder" thing happened back in fall 2023 when i was still semi new to the fandom and didnt know a lot of things. so tho i to this day i dont think it was that big of a deal, i wouldnt do it today

it was an artwork made for shits and giggles, the context of which i have explained here before. i never meant to imply that will wood is trans and i certainly dont "headcanon" him as that. my curse is that even when joking around i tend to try and make my art look good, so i get why people thought it was unironic. and i know that it sounds like a lame ass excuse, but it legit didnt cross my mind that people would think i drew will wood as a trans guy or smth. legit my only thought process was "funny haha internet thing" + "my favorite thing" = "good idea"

now the usage of his real name is something i am genuinely sorry for, but it was an accident and a genuine mistake on my part. i remember seeing someone mention it casually in some comment section, and assuming that it was ok, since i didnt know he was in any way against it. (i also thought that it was the same name that he used in "the real will wood" in that one section cus it sounded a bit similar).

when i was informed about the fact that he doesnt want it spread around i deleted the post right away and apologized, so bringing it up like something i did on purpose and out of malicious intent is a tad bit .. misfitting, if you can use that word

now the hot topic of the day: my waywood art

i have said this before and i will say this again, how i feel about rpf is solely based off how the people involved feel about it

to clarify: i never drew anything inappropriate or even suggestive with them, the "worst" thing is 2 simple sketches of them smoochin. or. this.

idk if this is what they were referring to when talking about me drawing will wood and gerard way "making out" (specifically. because i think "making out" implies to be more sexual stuff than small kisses). and if so, then it once again feels like blowing things out of proportion

and now the point i want you to get: will wood wouldnt give a flying fuck

like i said earlier, i never drew anything inappropriate, because that would actually cross will's existent and real boundaries. you know, the ones that he stated

im not making some conspiracy theories about him being gay, like some people seem to imply in their inbox messages to me

im not sending a whole ass smut fanfiction to litwtc gmail or something, i dont bother him in instagram dms asking if he wants to fuck gerard way, im not shipping him with people who he actually knows personally and has to look in the eyes of from time to time

im not doing anything that he would actually care about

him and chris have joked about him being attracted to gerard before, and though im not saying that you can joke about everything theyve ever joked about, i feel like in our case its clear that will clearly doesnt care about the implications ? (i generally believe that ww fans would get their panties twisted about less things if more of them listened to what these 2 talk about so calmly on litwtc but i digress)

if he saw that some random teenager on tumblr is drawing him and gerard way (gasp of horror) holding hands, he'd laugh at it max and then move on with his day

people are treating the whole situation like i posted pictures of him from when he was a kid or leaked patreon content or drew him fully naked or anything else that, you know, would actually affect him in one way or another

what im doing is innocent fun which isnt even likely to reach either of them. will wood very rarely checks tumblr and, once again, i genuinely dont believe he would care. and gerard way aint got no internet + he doesnt care x 2

it is weird but rn this is what brings me the most joy, even if its silly to say. both will wood and gerard way mean a lot to me and putting them in situations together makes me happy. i am but a child full of fun whimsy

i wont be posting any more explicitly romantic art to avoid more drama, and i also wont be responding to all the anon messages i received because there are like .. too many of them. an overwhelming amount i'd say. sorry about that

i really didnt mean to cause such a fuss, and i understand why some people might be uncomfortable with what i do

i fully understand why you would dislike my waywood hyperfixation shenanigans, and i dont have a problem w you over that, but treating me like pure evil because of a thing so insignificant is just.. overdoing it

once again, i will be toning it down, but it really isnt the end of the world if i dare to draw will wood and gerard way being a tad bit gay (which is, i apparently need to mention, not me actually saying that will wood the alternative musician is a homosexual gay who is in a genuine for real actual real gay homosexual relationship with gerard fucking way the lead singer of my chemical romance. i think speculating on other people's sexuality and gender identity is boooo tomato tomato tomato)

sorry for the rant and sorry to all who were disappointed by my lack of remorse. come back in a couple years when i turn 18 and stop having fun and artistic freedom

thank you for your attention and i hope i at least cleared some things up to those who werent w me throughout every event where i get involved in fandom drama

bye bye

[faunandfloraas]

Okay so!! Im back now and its journal entry time. highlights of dominATE sydney, in no particular order:

Chan starting the show by stealing the joke from the reporter from the project by being like we're straya kids hehehe

Lee know not really introducing himself but rather just chanting OI OI OI immediately (he continued this the rest of the night

Seungmin started the night by singing SYDNEYYYYY very passionatly and kept adlibbing Sydney into so mang songs for the rest of the night. My fave being "Cause stuff it all cuz I'm gonna go SYDNAYYY"

Han at one point was suddenly laying on the floor being all silly and then chan feigned stomping him ?? And my brother was like HUH lmao

Lee know kept feeling up Changbin (understandable) he also gave changbin the mic during lee knows part, so he had to sing them 🩷

Chan FINALLY saying fuck /into the mic/ after 150 years of me talking shit 🫶

The dad in front of me who honestly seemed more into the show than his teenage kids, perhaps helped by the fact he was smashing back beers- could hear him passionately trying to keep up with Han rapping at one point so automatically I respect him

The girl behind me who went CHANGBIN really deep and evil when she thought it was time for his solo but it was not in fact LMAO

Saw Hannah bahng! Saw Mr and Mrs Bang. They were very smiley, it was cute!

I got to see chan annoy seungmin briefly <3 with my own eyes 🥰

AUSSIE BOY HWANG HYUNJIN!! SYDNEY BOY HWANG HYUNJIN

Innie walked in front of the camera slightly ruining a hyunjin and han lil gay moment and made > :0 this face before ducking. Also him being all My stage Ahhh sexy 😇

Just any and all changbin.

Lee know and seungmins vocal lesson were really on display bc they Made Sure you could hear their voices over the music and I loved every second!

Chan railway was truly An Experience. He had me enthralled. He had my bro enthralled. He had the drunk dad enthralled.

Seungmin thanking chans dad for food LMAO

Hyunjins repeated winks at the camera being met with ungodly roars was totally expected and yet I roared along. Fanservice king if im honest.

Felix and chan being lil gronks together was so funny.... so good. I love them....

They faked it was the end and people did get up to go but I was like NUH UH seungmin was not the last one on that stage they're coming back!! And I was RIGHT and when they did end he was the last one and he ended the night with an evil cackle and it only cemented my love more 🫶

Lee know happy birthday!! Not to be a gay lil thing but I was so happy we got to sing it for him! And confuse him and hyunjin with the HIP HIP HOORAY also im p sure chan thinks its HIP IP lol

I also saw him eat shit and slip a lil which was funny, right at the end of the show.

Also lee know lifted seungmins arm in the air at the end this time! Not the other way around!! He did that for me, I think. Also put his arm around his shoulders- so 🫶 I got chan and seungmin and lee know and seungmin 🫶 my fellas 🫶

All in all it was so fun and the band was amazing too, the light show... such a good night.

And Bang Chan. Well. I love him. Lol. I really kinda do tho. He said I'm chris from Sydney and I was like Yeah! you are!! Idk. Everyone was amazing but he was the main event, maybe bc he's the sydney boy... also the fan event at the end was a sweet little animation and he was the prince and it made me laugh bc I do keep saying he's the crown prince of Sydney.... he's honestly really someone I think I'm quite happy to see representing us on such a big world stage, bc he does really seem to have such a big heart and a lot of love- idk. Christopher Bang. What a fella. His smile is truly like a beam and he was so happy and every time he was smiling, I was smiling, too. I hope he feels proud tonight, lol.

And I still wanna bite seungmin on the cheek 🫶 Suffice to say- best concert to break my many years no concert streak with 🩷 it was a lovely night.

Also felix went from being bone dry to soaked head to toe in about 3 seconds when I wasn't looking 😭

[scooter-ing]

another silly rant.. . but this time its NOT about wenclair??

jesus, i just rewatched little witch academia after YEARS, and the pure sapphic energy radiating from that show is craaaazy yo. (heed my spoiler warning for lwa)

yeah so.. diakko. kay. now that that's out of the way

i actually loved akko's character as a whole, as ambitious and stupid as she is, i can totally see some of myself in her. i never saw her as a selfish person, i feel like she always considered and appreciated those around her. every time she cried and demeaned herself (especially in the second half of the show) i was like "poor baby" bc she really didn't deserve it. sure, was she a tad bit impulsive? yeah. but her character is meant to be easily swayed and convinced. like how croix convinced her to go to the wagandea tree, and literally gaslighted her into thinking she shouldn't trust chariot (ursula). as a character though, she really, truly, just tries to help people and i think you rarely see characters that are as pure as that, you know? her dream is to make people happy, not some bullshit like being the strongest witch, or obtaining some kind of object. she just aspires to fill people's hearts with joy, and her intentions are set with that only. and she tries, and tries, and tries, despite people's discouragement. so every time she cried, i cried with her. sigh.

moving on to ursula, otherwise known as chariot. i loved her older sister-mentor role. akko definitely needed someone that would keep her in line, but also encourage her in her endeavors and keep her safe. my girl was ALWAYS there to save the day (and by gOD she was so fucking hot whenever she was fighting croix). ughhh i literally groaned out loud every time she got interrupted when she was trying to tell akko about her identity. idk, i kind of have mixed feelings about the dream fuel spirit shebang. cause, chariot had NO idea it was stopping people from being able to use magic, so it wasn't really her fault. croix manipulated her. and once she found out about that, she stopped using it. im glad croix had somewhat of a redemption, but jesus she was such an asshole when she revealed that ursula was chariot. like, a royal asshole. bc that was not her secret to reveal, you know? and she left some very important pointers on the table. though, i felt terrible for akko.

mmmm. diaaaaaaaaana. diana cavendish. i had a massive lesbian crush on her for the whole fucking series. oh my god. especially in the two-part episodes where it's set in the cavendish estate? so, so, chivalrous, and dashing, and royal... and skdjhfskjlhf (totally referencing that one scene where diana defends akko infront of aunt daryl and offers her arm for akko to hold). poor akko, oblivious to like... all of the massive lesbian signals wafting from diana. she literally had big neon signs that said "akko you fucking idiot im gay for you."

all jokes (and thirsting) aside, diana and akko's growth as a pair is really touching to me. diana was never outright rude to her bc of her inability to properly use magic, i saw that she was more judgmental of her character as a person instead. (e.g the samhain festival episode in which she calls akko pathetic for "leaving" lotte and sucy before her performance). and i can totally see that it was reasonable. later in the episode, after akko finds the second Word or whatever, she goes on to think, "what is this emotion i'm feeling?" as much as i would want it to, i wouldn't say she was in love at that time, considering her harsh judgment earlier in the episode, but akko continues to grow on her from then on. i haven't mentioned this yet, but the episode (sorry that i keep saying "that episode" the site that i watched it on didn't have episode names) in which the faeries ordered a strike against the witches, was actually less goofy and funny than it was made to be. akko really took time to understand where the workers were coming from, and being their representative was really thoughtful? when diana came to tell her off, she deadass started making fun of her bc shes an aristocrat. and telling her she doesn't understand the woes of the working class bc of her wealth. which is just... so... real? and diana gets all flustered, which leads me into the topic of:

Diana Literally Only Blushed Because of Akko. she just gets all flustered when akko calls her out on her shit, like she's not afraid of her. everyone else is. even the godforsaken teachers are. she only ever truly worried whenever akko was hurt, or in some form of danger. she completely remains indifferent to everything, even when things happen to hannah or barbara she really doesn't give a shit. (at least not in the way she does with akko, she's probably loyal to her friends and shows it in her own way). which segues me into the episode "yesterday," in which akko goes "missing" and jesus christ diana's dialogue with chariot is really touching. from "akko needs you more than anything right now!" to "what could possibly be more important that akko right now!?" and "i'm more disappointed in you than i am of your past." she's just so well spoken in the most disastrous and telling moments, and it really shows how strong of a character she is. she remains level headed when lotte and sucy consult her about akko, and kindly offers them tea, along with reassurances. despite her generally not hanging out with akko's crowd of people, she's still kind and considerate when people need her. her words to chariot/ursula are so powerful because she's depicted as so stoic and indifferent but completely tells her off when she knows what ursula is doing is wrong. i hope that makes sense? from an apathetic elitist to a passionate worrywart - all over akko. and once she finds her, she basically acts as her caretaker, in that moment. and i'd be lying if i said i didn't cry, because god. diana knew exactly how to make her feel better, and man is that not an indicator to how perfect akko and diana are for each other. her confessing that she felt envious of akko's determination and closeness to chariot, and confessed to wanting to get away from akko bc of it, but ended up just getting closer to her.

in the last episode, in which they stop the missile, i was just so happy to see where their growth led them. them holding each other while doing the shiny arc thingamajig? awesome. akko catching diana when she falls? diana screaming for akko when akko falls? which inevitably leads to her falling because she's crazy for akko? really hit me in the feels. undeniably happy. joy. the parallels between chariox and diakko are like, super obvious. except for the fact that diakko was the better example, in which they worked together instead of one envying the other for their power. like how diana initially said she envied akko for having the shiny rod, and croix getting jealous of chariot bc of it too - except diana learned to accept it and support akko and work with her. bc red and blue gays. ygm.

i'll talk about andrew and the rest of 'em later bc im fairly tired but. im sorry for the excessive tangent. i likely left out a lot of what i wanted to say bc big gay brainrot, and i'll spew that out sometime later.

thank u for listening to my ted talk stay gay!!

[woneuntonzz]

torn and folded .ᐟ (2/2)

📞 ; “respectfully, you're disgusting.” | 💿 part 1...

𖹭 : bully!seunghan x bl reader, amab!reader

💭 you loved your free time in manga reading websites, not him though, he thinks you need your senses sorted out for you, and so he would...

⤷ contains: mlm pairing (this is pure fiction and is in no way

made to assume the idol's sexuality!!), angst, bullying,

homophobia towards mc (i myself have struggled with), fluff,

humor (kys/kms jokes), mention of other idol names for world

building

⤷ wc: 11.2k!! (not proofread :3)

-ˋˏ under the cut .ᐟ ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

saxyguy1002

hey bunz

can i ask u a question

what do u do when u like someone?

bunz

why’d u even ask if you can ask me when you’re gonna ask either way

saxyguy1002

sorry

bunz

oh

well

idk either

saxyguy1002

do u like someone rn?

You sighed, deleting what you have previously typed: you.

bunz

yes

saxyguy1002

who is it? 👀

bunz

u don’t even know him

idk why ur even asking

saxyguy1002

ur right

so what

ur just out being a loser all day and not do anything about it?

You could only laugh silently at your screen. 

bunz

he hates me

saxyguy1002

ouch

sucks for u ig

bunz

kys lol

saxyguy1002

ur so sweet

dw u have me

fuck that guy

You rolled your eyes, you couldn’t believe you were smiling over everything despite the somber truth behind it all.

bunz

i thought ur not gay

saxyguy1002

that’s a conversation for another day

come on

tell me to kms

bunz

um, okay????

kys

saxyguy1002

something’s missing

bunz

AAAAAA HELLL

kys :3 (hope u dont wake up tomorrow)

saxyguy1002

i will :> (i have to wake up so i can actually kms)

You don’t think twice before shutting down your computer the second you’ve read his reply. Looking at the time, you had once again spent two hours of your night chatting. It’s crazy how far you’ve gone when it comes to talking, it would always be just about the games you’ve played, sometimes complaining to each other about school. It was him who’d start talking you into revealing more about yourself, and he’d do the same without even asking. That’s how you found out that he was definitely Seunghan. 

At first, his messages made sense for the guy you saw him to be in school, then he’d change, it’s very gradual but it’s there for your eyes. You’ve played the waiting game before, longer than anyone, you just hope waiting for him would amount to something. 

You’d spend your next days with Matthew tailing behind you, and like what you agreed upon, you two would read that manga you were currently reading, next to each other on your phone. Somehow he got you to feel comfortable enough to stay in the library with him instead of that desolate room. Of course, he’d ask you why you liked it there, and you’d tell him everything. Despite your attempts of flailing his attention towards the manga on your phone, he’d continue to ask you if you were fine with not being in your safe space. 

“I’m really okay.” he kept his eyes on you, as if urging you to keep talking. “For now at least.”

“You know, actually followed you there because I thought you were up to something bad —but I didn’t know it was you either since all I could see was your backside.” it was the first time he’d hear you laugh audibly, and he’d smile. 

If you were being honest, you felt like you still had to keep your guard up. He’s told you himself that he’s heard about you, probably seen you at your most piteous state. It just boggles your mind that him approaching you was purely arbitrary, and like others, he didn’t care much about you being bullied before. But you gave him the benefit of the doubt, he had a life of his own and he was most probably concentrated with what he had going on in it, after all, you were mere strangers to each other.

You quickly learned that you were only spared when you’re with him, but back in your class, you still suffered the same hell.

“Seunghan, why aren’t you responding at the group chat?”

Or maybe not quite the same. 

You vowed to yourself to never let your eyes wander around without care, but you felt so anxious, you could feel it at the back of your head. With some shameful guessing, you thought you might know whose eyes it is that pricked you. You braced yourself once you stood up from your seat, hearing the bell ring for the last time that day, it was tradition for them to push you around before going home.

And they did just that. You’d be on the floor hurrying to gather your belongings that were scattered on the floor, by chance —and because of your cluttered mind— you looked up to the door, and Seunghan would pass by. You caught his eyes looking right into yours for a very brief moment before he completely vanished from your sight. 

There was something about him that day, he didn’t walk up to you, he didn’t steal your phone and threw it around, he was just there. It was like back in middle school, you knew he could see you, but he chose to not give any of his attention. 

saxyguy1002

aaa sorry my play was ass

i can’t believe i’m bot frag

bunz

i was ass too

saxyguy1002

we’ll get it next time

ig it’s not a very great idea to play with a lot of things on ur mind

bunz

same

what is it for you anyways?

saxyguy1002

i’m gonna be 18 soon

technically i’d be an adult by then 

right? 

bunz

yeah?

why ask?

r u planning to commit felonies rn be fr

saxyguy1002

no

i just wanted to be 

away

from my parents

bunz

oh

what is it about this time?

saxyguy1002

i’m just tired of it all

they’re too controlling

and what for? lmaoooooooo

i feel like i’m gonna burst

i can’t even pursue my dreams because of them

talking abt “you’ll end up–” 

idc where i end up as long as it’s not with them

bunz

ykw

if ur confident enough that u can survive out there on your own

do it 

this is your one chance with life, do what you can to live it to the fullest

saxyguy1002

could’ve just said "YOLO and embrace your FOMO"

bunz

kill

your

self

saxyguy1002

i was totally just jk

just just kidding

enough abt me

you?

bunz

it’s the same thing pretty much

my dad would kill me if he found out

saxyguy1002

that ur gay?

nahh u have to escape 

i’ll help

bunz

that’s crazy tho

u dont even know where i’m at

saxyguy1002

oh but what if i do

bunz

then u can be a private investigator

or a psycho stalker

my saesang <33

saxyguy1002

bunz stan 😋

bunz

kys :3 (idk kinda hope u sleep w/o that shit in mind)

saxyguy1002

i will :> (thanks ik u want me fr)

The days that followed, you could see his messages reflecting through the way he behaved at school. He was no longer one you had to be careful around, still, he seemed to be just as indifferent towards you. There’d be moments where you’d catch his eyes, but in them was something you haven’t seen before —or more likely, in a while. You’d cross paths outside the classroom often, and seldom times he was in the library too, and you would try your best to see what he was doing without completely turning your head towards him. He just studied, by himself. 

It wasn’t a rare, once in a lifetime type of event, he was still quite the grade-conscious student because of his parents —he’s told you before— it’s just that he was always by himself. It should be for the best, getting away from those people, maybe he’d get his old self back, maybe you’d have him back in your life. The memories you shared then weighed more than anything else in your life, and even after everything he’s said and done to you, you would continue to carry it, still missing him behind the malignant persona he had created. 

In the meantime, you would have your usual routine with Matthew, and it immediately crossed your mind —if he had ever grown tired of these little hangouts, so you end up paying every little action, every little sound your consciousness, seeing if he was any different from the previous day. He’d never change, there was nothing that you could see, so you granted him your trust, even if it was hard giving it away again after a long while. 

“The guy is crazy, don’t you think? If he really loved the main character, why would he make him suffer through it?” —he was talking about the manga you two were reading. 

“I mean, it’s for the storyline.” you laughed at his sour face. “You read it anyway.”

It felt wonderful to let yourself breathe in every moment, not having to hold it to block off the torturous stench of your classmates’ perfumes. You hoped that this would last, at least until you had to graduate. He made school a bit more bearable for you.

However, with his absence, you’d shift back to your usual self, leery towards everything. You’d go back to that room, but it would not be the same as when you left it. 

You were that cautious boy all over again, taking light steps to the place that in your world, you owned, carrying most of what you could, even the items you knew you wouldn’t need. Your eyes scanned left to right, keeping your vision’s periphery clear for any threats, or anyone who could be following you.

When you got there, you stood outside of the room for a while. It wasn’t possible to peek without opening the door since the glass was blocked off by black tape —and it was probably there to keep students out. You convinced yourself that you had no reason to be nervous, it was your room, your sanctuary. You took a hold of the doorknob, very carefully turning it so that it makes very little sound. Every second that passed, you’d open it a little wider, and wider, until you could take a full view of the room. 

“Sorry.” you had turned your heel, ready to take speedy steps away from your comfort, but he who seconds ago was lax and seated, would rush towards you, grabbing your wrist and pulling you inside the room. 

He’d close the door, but you could only hear the sound it made, you couldn’t take your eyes off him, especially when he was that close. His eyes slowly made their way to yours, you could feel your heart racing, recalling the last time you were in his proximity. He felt you subtly trying to move yourself out of his grasp, so he’d release you from it, keeping his eyes on you. When he let go of your hand, you’d look around, feeling anxious about everything. You were thinking about what he was going to do next and what he was going to say. 

You’d withdraw yourself from where you stood, backing away because of his sudden movements —he had raised his hand with his palm facing the ceiling, holding it up in front of you as if he was asking for you to give him something. You were unsure of what he wanted, and he took notice of that, his other hand reaching for his nape. 

“I didn’t know you’d be back in here.” his voice was impossibly soft, you were sure you looked like you had seen a ghost. “This was so sudden, I know.”

It was like your body had a mind of its own, and you would shake your head without being fully aware, pulling on your own fingers as your eyes went all over his face. You could feel the heat creeping up your face, so you’d look away to the side. 

“I’m sorry.” he’d lower his hand at a painfully slow pace, still keeping his gaze at you, and soon his eyes were glossed, “For everything.”

That day wouldn’t be as bad as it’d usually be, even without Matthew’s presence. That day, old feelings would resurface, with much greater magnitude. That day, you held his hand again, and it was like the first time all over again, where you gave it your all to not give off how jumpy your heart got. The two of you were just in that room, till the last bell sounded. You were sitting on the floor against the wall near the door, and your hands would remain entwined. You were so close to each other, like how you used to be, like those times under that big tree at that old park. His hands would move towards your head again, but this time it wouldn’t be to get rid of a leaf that landed on your hair, he’d lead your head on his shoulder, and his grip on your hand would be a little tighter, but somehow still gentle. You waited for him to talk, but he didn’t utter another word. All you could hear was his breathing, that at some point would falter when you moved after hearing the bell. 

“We should go back.” your voice was as quiet as the wind, yet he felt like he’d melt from it. 

“We could.” he’d let his tongue swipe against his top lip before he spoke again, “But we don’t have to.”

So you didn’t. You were there for hours, but somehow it still felt like very little time. You still had to ask him why he was being like that. What changed?

saxyguy1002

this is a sign

pursue your love

bunz

r u being fr

what’s up with you?

saxyguy1002

hahahahahahahahaha

don’t you ever just go

  ☺️

👉👈

bunz

huh 😭😭😭😭😭

saxyguy1002

yea so

i’m basically gonna risk it all now

maybe not all

not all at once

🤓

bunz

what is bro yapping about 💥💥

saxyguy1002

how’d u find out that you’re gay?

bunz

excuse me?

saxyguy1002

serious question btw ☝️

bunz

☝️🤓 well actually

ok wait 

serious face on

so 

saxyguy1002

hello?

gay ghosted

bunz

GASPED WHAT

ok 

well

i’ve known this boy for so long since we were kids typa beat and idk i never really liked any girls, i mean sure they're pretty and cute and all but i never pictured myself with any of them

but i did with this boy 

saxyguy1002

u have to tell me everything

bunz

kys :3 (go to sleep freak)

saxyguy1002

no :< (wait plz)

bunz

bro

saxyguy1002

that’s crazy

bunz

what

saxyguy1002

you know who i am don’t u

i know u

bunz

???

ur actually tweaking

ok fine u win

ur scaring me

go kys fr

saxyguy1002

y/n

The hand that held yours and led you back to his haven.

bunz

who

???

bro who’s that 😭

saxyguy1002

don’t be like that now :((

it took me this long to realize

stupid 

i’m stupid

i’ve told u a lot of things

even mentioned chaeyoung

that name is so awful to look at 

i’m sorry

bunz

seunghan

i’m gonna go

saxyguy1002

you’ll come back, right?

You took a sharp inhale, deleting every single reply you had thought of and typed out. You left him on read, not really knowing what to do from then on, yet, you were so eager to find out how this night would affect tomorrow. 

Slipping into the soft sheets, your eyes would swell with tears looking back at how he turned against you then. Your eyes would end up swollen, you felt so drained that you dreamt of nothing but the dark. 

Your thoughts went running fast, he owed you an explanation, and you believe he could give it to you soon enough after everything that unfolded from yesterday. 

“You seem to have a lot in mind.” you jumped at Matthew’s query, your consciousness being drawn out of your clouded head.

“Huh?”

“You’ve been re-reading that panel for ten minutes now.”

You sighed, feeling betrayed by your cognition. You ran your fingers through your hair, thinking about how you’ve been stealing glances from each other all day, and how he walked past you a little slower, mouthing “Let’s meet, room.” He had no room to be careless, he knew his sister still had her eyes on him.

“I’ll be busy later, you can keep reading, you really don’t have to wait for me.” you utter when your mind flies to the image of your hand in his. 

“Got it.” you just hoped Matthew wouldn’t spot you and follow you into that room again. 

You went there after your first afternoon class, after you’ve seen him leave first —not before calling you to follow with his eyes though. The door was only slightly open when you got there, and you’d poke your head in first, before finally letting yourself in.

“So you’re bunz.” he said once you were seated next to him. You’d only nod at him, and once again your eyes were stuck to each other. “When did you figure out it was me you’re talking to?”

“It took a while too. I had to piece together the things you were telling me. Then, like you said, you mentioned your sister.” he had to bite his lip to hold himself back from beaming, he felt as if your voice was enough to take him out of this earth. 

“And I had to tell you her name too huh.” he softly laughs at himself, “I got too comfortable I guess, no wonder why.” 

His eyes would trail down, tracing every detail of your face, and you’d follow his eyes, wondering what lies behind the darkness of those orbs. It had driven you to finally ask him what you’ve been longing to know, “What made you change back then?”

You swore you heard his breath hitch, and his eyes would slowly start to water. “Chaeyoung. She was going to tell on me.”

His parents, now you could understand a bit more clearly. What was it that his sister had against him that she’s got him backed up in a corner? And why did he have to add to your suffering?

“She forced me into… everything.” he’d open his hand as a means to ask for yours, and you’d give it to him, “If my parents knew, they’d move me away.”

You stared at your clasped hands, watching his thumb lightly graze over your hand, “Knew what?”

He felt a lump in his throat forming after you’ve sounded your question, and with a light squeeze to his hand, he answered, “That my eyes are only for you. You know I like you, right?”

It was nothing but a hunch then, but you felt crazy because for others it might fall in line with the normality of some friendships. It all meant something after all.

“I always have, but it did take a while for me to grasp on it.” now he had a grasp on you. “I know what I did to you was irredeemable, but, now that we’re older, would you give me a chance?”

You looked at each other like nothing else in the world mattered, you thought everything else around you was fading into dust when you caught a glimpse of your own reflection in his eyes.

“You don’t have to answer now.”

“Do I have to answer? you got me, Seunghan.”

Before he could take another breath of air, the door would open, and there he saw your friend whose face would display shock. You’d turn around, only to be met with Matthew who’d soon repeatedly utter his apology before pacing away. 

“Shit. I should talk to him.” you stood up, breaking the contact of your locked hands. 

“I’ll go with you.” you stared at Seunghan for a while, taking his words into serious consideration. 

“No. Chaeyoung might see you.”

“I don’t care. Let her see me. I’m more than ready to run away from that house.” —the truth is, he wasn’t much prepared, but he was firm that mentally, he was ready.

“We’re only graduating. It’s too risky. What about the dreams you want to pursue?” your tone sounded of worry, and it made his heart weak, wanting to just run into you so you could take him in your arms. 

“It’s you. I want to pursue you, Y/n.” his voice was a bit shaky, and it almost cracked, his eyes lured you to him, and he’d let himself melt in your embrace. 

You’d eventually have a talk with Matthew, but it would be the next day. He was surprised to see Seunghan following behind you. He had many questions, and they were all answered, indirectly at most. He didn’t even bother asking most of what he wanted to, he could already see it from the way you looked at each other, or how close your faces were and how your hands brushed against each other, feeling too bashful to just hold one another —though you’d argue that you were only that close because you had to whisper, you were in a library after all.

It’s been two weeks, two weeks of exchanged glances and secret signals to meet each other in that room. It’d be after the first week when he’d let his guard up when you were being messed with by his sister or the others, for the first time, he’d walk in between you and another guy who was causing you trouble, and he’d grab for your hand, dragging you out of the room with him. You expressed your worry, telling him that you were used to it, that he shouldn’t have done that, especially when his sister was there to see everything. He told you he’d handle everything, and he did.

“Are you seriously choosing to be this stupid Hong Seunghan?” That night his sister bursts into his room with this query, evidently enraged, “You really want me to tell mom and dad?”

“Yeah, go ahead, and while you’re at it, I’ll tell them about your boyfriend too and how he fucked you into failing three of your classes.” his stare was daring her to snap back.

“You have no proof of that, do you?”

“I can get proof if I ask him, it’s not like he knows how much of a good girl you are at home, you pretentious fuck.”

“You can’t talk to me like that!”

“Oh shut the fuck up. You’ve been shit to me and Y/n ever since we were children. Grow the fuck up. Y/n didn’t do shit to make your life as miserable as you’ve made his.” Now he was no longer afraid.

It was only a year ago when he had thought about what he truly wanted, and then he’d realize that he was close enough to start fixing himself up, thinking of ways on how he’d go about everything, starting with moving away from his family as soon as he could —if they didn’t threaten him first. He had to secure his chances, cause now he was sure that his future plans involved you.

It was quite a surprise that the torment would stop, though you would still receive glares and you could still hear them muttering under their breath, they would never get too close to you again. You were even more surprised when Seunghan had approached you at your desk, and you could see the stunned expression on the faces that scowled at you. 

“You’re not in trouble are you?” you quietly asked.

He places a hand on your shoulder, lowering himself to whisper to you, “I’m not, but I’m still not sure how long this will last. Let’s talk about it in our room later.” when he rose from your ear, he’d give you a light smile, walking out of the classroom. 

When you were back in your room, he proceeded to tell you about his plans moving forward, he also told you about the fight he had with his sister. He was quite set on what he wanted to do, wanting to get a scholarship, moving out of his parent’s house, getting a job while still attending college, and in his own words, the most important of all, to be with you along the way. 

“But, you know, you can tell me if you have plans that go against mine. It’s okay, I know you have goals of your own.” but if you were being honest, you were under so much pressure and fear for the future that you didn't even know what you wanted to do with your life. 

“I want to be with you.” It took him great effort to not close the distance between your faces right then and there. 

But of course, it was all easier said than done. 

Your relationship would remain the same till you graduated, following the same pattern everyday, keeping things as discreet as possible for the both of you. After graduation, you were talking to each other every other hour of the day, thoughts about the next phase of your life spilling out.

You were nervous to finally receive the results of your entrance exams for all the universities you were able to apply for, out of five, you were able to get into two, both offering scholarships.

You were high up in the clouds, thinking about preparing for college. You actually had a life ahead of you now, and you were glad that you ended up with the same boy you had started your journey with. 

You packed your stuff nicely in an old travel bag owned by your mom, who was no longer around, not dead, just decided she had enough of your mentally abusive father. You made sure to clean very diligently, so that your dad wouldn’t grumble about it after you’ve left. 

You wanted to leave this life behind you, the redundant pressure you’ve pushed to yourself, just to please your father who had given you more pain than help. So that morning before you left, you made sure you were leaving for good. 

“I’m gay.” 

You had expected him to throw his cup of coffee at you, but he’d just chuckle, his raspy voice made you flinch. “I know.” he’d laugh even more when he saw the expression on your face, “I’ve looked through your computer. You know, there’s really not much I can do. You’re not hurting anyone for being with another man, so go, live your life.”

It was nothing you could have foreseen, but before you left, you just had to give him one last hug, uttering a soft little thank you.

“He really said that?” Now you sit in a park near campus, under a tree, smaller than the one from your cherished memories, but just as beautiful. 

“I was surprised too. I’m not even sure if I heard him correctly.” Seunghan wrapped an arm around your shoulder, and you would do the same, wrapping an arm around his waist.

Your head laid on his shoulder, and his lie on top of it. He’d very gently rub circles on your shoulder with his thumb, and you could feel him sigh, chest going into a labored rise and falling back with ease. “I guess we could start with your idea.”

“The webcomic?” he’d hummed a response to your question. You sat up and faced him, your hand enclosing his own. “Our story would make for a good webcomic, don’t you think?”

“Hmm, you’re not wrong.” his lips would grow into a smile once he’d seen your beaming face. 

It wouldn’t take much time before he let his eyes wander down your lips, and you’d take notice of it. You beat him to it, and it was you who would close the proximity, sending heat waves throughout his entire body. When you pulled away, he’d blink a couple of times. He was only about to hold the back of your head to pull you in closer. You laughed at his bewildered face, and he’d become shy. 

“We can continue, my dorm room is probably empty, my roommate said he’d be out for a while.” you tell him, and he’d wear a smug grin making you cringe a little. 

“Yeah. Let’s do that.” he couldn’t help but take a pause, taking in how ethereal you looked at the moment, or how soft your hair was that he found all excuses in the book just to touch it. “And while we’re at it, I should start making concept art, sketches and all that. I’m gonna need a full body reference.”

Your face would wrinkle at his words, lightly pinching at his cheek. “Respectfully, you’re disgusting.”

His sweet chuckle almost made you forget you were in a public space, in a park. Though there were not many people there at that time, you were quite wary, something that would take time for you to adjust. 

So where did your ambitions take you?

After a year of college, you were both successful in selling your webcomics to a well known publisher —you could say you took longer than you should, given that most of your work time consisted of half-hour make-out sessions— and soon it would boom, and most people loved it, some were of course, a little less tolerant. 

Other than that, Seunghan had to deal with his parents who’d eventually find out about your relationship, and to that he replied, “What do you mean ‘shame on you for dating a gay man’? I am gay.” 

He’d make sure to add it to his bio in your favorite game. 

21 / male and gay AND i have a boyfriend @bunzshh

Disgusting, you mean, disgustingly adorable? People could call you disgusting all they want, but it’s the twenty-first century, people should be worrying about climate change and the things that are actually causing harm to the world. Don’t worry though, your story could only end on such a sweet note, and if people hated you, you still had your man (and no other).

boyfriend (legal)

fuck u

my man (and no other)

u already did like 12 hours ago???

boyfriend (legal)

ur sick

kys 🤍 (come over plssss)

my man (and no other)

i will 🖤 (hehehehhehehehehe open the door veronica)

End.

[sincapjelly]

Being both delulu and a writer is bad. Because I can make my delulu actually work with realities that I can shape...

If you know, you know, I have a Ninjago oc, Liann, who is Cole's daughter in one of my au's. Lego already has a character named Liann, in Friends, and I actually named my oc way before learning about the Friends reboot. So it was pure coinsidence, as my character's full name isn't even actually Liann.

But well, this still made me a little upset when I found out. I really liked the name Liann for my oc, it was a perfect fit for the story. She was named after Cole's mother, as her full name is Lilianne, but to give her her own identity she was called Liann blah blah. I hated that the name was already in a Lego show.

But I also loved Friends as a kid, so when I learned about the new show I did watch it, and I love the show so much now. The more I watched, the more Liann also sit with me. As someone with adhd myself, I saw so much of myself in Liann, watching her has become very healing. I thought I needed her so bad when I was in middle school.

Well, where is delulu, you might ask. This is where things get twisted. Because she shares her name with my oc, when I first started to watch the show, my brain almost couldn't differenciate her and my oc, tried to mix them. And I ended up coming up with similarities between Cole anf Friends Liann. It was fun beibg delulu on purpose. But the worst part is, it grew on me. The idea of them being the Friends universe counterpart or something, even though my oc is quite different than Friends Liann, it was so fun.

The fact that both Liann and Cole in later seasons do silly dances when happy, having binge problems with sweets, sometimes making similar poses or faces, it just fueled my delulu. And please, look me in the eyes and say she doesn't look like him at all. Not to mention the sassyness they both have. Like that's his daughter y'all! The genes are way too strong!(/hj)

But jokes aside, I actually do like the idea of them being father-daughter in some way (and I know Cole's gay, I never imagine him being not gay, just bare with me.). What if the reason we don't meet Liann's father is because she lives with her mother only, her father is absent or whatever. Or what if Liann doesn't have the same father as her little twin siblings? I know they look similar to Liann, but Liann doesn't look similar to her mother. So she probably looks more like her father, whoever that is, delulu or not.

Welp, if you wanna listen the rest of my delulu, here goes the most delulu story ever.

I AM CRINGE, BUT I AM FREE. THESE ARE LEGO PEOPLE WE ARE SUPPOSED TO USE OUR IMAGINATION AND I AM DOING EXACTLY THAT. YOU CAN'T CRINGE-SHAME ME.

Anyway:

For some reason, just like in the Ninjago Movie universe, I like to think Cole was making music in this universe as well. Maybe in a rock band? I could see him in a band. (XDINARY HEROES SO COLE VIBES IDK)

And well, fame comes with consequences, and bad mental health, especially if you are very young.

What if Michelle, Liann's mother, and Cole did know each other when they were younger, I'd assume maybe Cole was trying to figure out himself, if they were so young back then, what if he just was confused or in denial of his sexuality and he let things go so far (won't explain, you know what I mean). Later being trapped because things went too far and he blames himself and now he just couldn't stop it without outing himself to the world.

Though this all just came back to hit even worse at him, as his bad mental state caused him to not do his job as he used to before, the band split at some point and Michelle did end up accusing him of everything that happened. Though her claims were forgotton not too long, it was enough to crush Cole and his presence, because Cole did not fight the damage at all, already blaming himself.

So he disappeared like that. Leaving the world wonder what the fuck did they just witness.

Cole maybe named Liann himself, I like the idea. ("I know your name, I named you!")

So uh, Michelle grew hateful towards Cole, and couldn't differenciate those feelings from Liann, only made worse with how similar Liann is to Cole. There came being a strict, prohibitionist mother. Which even carried to her current relationship and twins (I'd assume she married someone else and Liann assumed that was her father too. So yeah the twins have a different father.).

Also while Cole stayed in the city, where he was his entire life, while Michelle went back to Heartlake city.

And since they never married, Cole had no custody nor any legal claims on Liann. He couldn't track her, he didn't know where Michelle was, he couldn't find Liann.

On top of all that, his health started to deteriorate, he fought terrible illness, had to solve that issue before he could do anything else with his life. Career, finding his daughter maybe, none could happen if he died. He was so terribly ill most of Liann's childhood.

Towards Liann's teen years, he left this sick chapter of his life behind, gaining his health back, he wanted his life back. But it couldn't start before he faced his past mistakes. He had to find his daughter and Michelle first.

Welp, knowing Michelle came to the big city from Heartlake, he most likely tried to fact check if she was there, and she was. Now he has to face them somehow.

Though once he is at Heartlake, he realises that Liann might not even know him, and it's more possible than her knowing his connection to her. While he still thinks she deserves the truth, he also isn't sure if Liann wants the truth. So even though he finds her, he can just not face her. Ends up accidentally stalking her when trying to talk to her. He comes to her school, Charli's diner, you know, crowded places so she feels secure, but he just can't. So he ends up running away.

Which... Liann notices. She even tells this to her friends at some point.

"I saw that guy again."

"What guy?"

"There is... this one guy that I keep seeing around, I don't want to be paranoid but it started to feel like I am being stalked."

"Are you okay? Should we call the police?"

"No, I don't even think he is dangerous. Like he can be, but he doesn't feel dangerous. I feel like he is more scared of me than I am scared of him."

"Huh??"

Welp! That's sorta what happens. If you wanna know if they meet or if Cole just ends up running away, I would talk about it! Come join me in my delulu, it's fun. Let's bs cringe together 🫶🫶🫶🫶

[angy-grrr]

My theory is that Hori was lonely and wanted a gf, but the problem is that only other like minded straight man seem to wanna hang out with him lol It's like another facet of that "ugly for straights but hot for gays" theory

(THIS IS A JOKE I DON'T ACTUALLY THINK THAT i just saw a comment and it made me laugh)

i have no idea what that theory is about -could someone explain it?

He has shown us good romantic relationships with little time before tho, so idk if it gets weird bc he relates to Deku or if he really didnt like the way the pair was developing and didnt want to fully commit lol

[s1mp4ev3r]

(CW: vent post and bad Grammer)

When I was six there was this new older girl who got held back or smth idk, but to our class and I talked to her for a few days and noticed she watched YouTube videos with inappropriate jokes, and I really didn't think much of it, and one day she asked if she wanted to go to the bathroom stall but without us getting caught so we made a plan, that I would ask and she would ask to go to the nurse since she had a "stomach ache" and we thought that was perfect so we went to the bathroom stall and she locked the door, and pinned me to the wall and pulled down my pants to my lower hips and I was confused and uncomfortable but I felt her breath on my neck but luckily I said "hey why don't we do this later, we might miss lunch, right?" And she was like yeahhh! But still tried to make me stay but we didn't and the next day I told her "I don't wanna be friends anymore" and then she would bully me but in KINDERGARTEN, mind you that the older boys would beat me up and I would try to fight back but I couldn't, and the recess teachers would see me on the ground and say get upp but I would run up the stairs to the other grades and laugh at them or well giggle, till one day I was running to hide and saw an older boy with glasses but he was nice and became my friend but he was in fifth grade so he left that year...and I was sad but besides that let's cut back to first grade where the SA is happening, and she started bullying me and stuff till we went to another class but didn't move grades, and I would usually get into arguments over stupid things but it was because I was a mentally ill kid? Idk, but we would hide away in the class and make out sadly and now let's cut to fourth grade where I realized during flash I was getting groomed? And raped? Idk if that counts but I told my friends but they didn't believe me and during the summer of fourth grade before school ended I found out I was on my period and I didn't tell my mom till fifth grade so I survived each month with it sadly and in third grade was when I liked my first girl as well and got called gay etc etc but idrc and pushed past it and in fifth grade the whole grade knew and supported it or just didn't wanna bully me or smth and that's when I got my first bf but I liked others guys as well because hormonal stuff, duhh but I got called slurs for it and I found out in summer that I was drepressed, and then once again I found out I was genderfluid in sixth grade and didn't get bullied for it or well bc most didn't know, and now I carry this burden that if I come out to my family about this I will be blamed for coming out too late and I sexualize myself and get hypersexual because of what I've been exposed too and I usually stay up late and barely sleep at night but all day and I starve myself to be pretty and pop my pimples leaving scars as well...and I hate talking to people think everyone is judging me or hating me but now I'm 15 years old and still afraid of this.. everything really

SO TYSM for reading this if u did have a good day or night and happy holidays♥️♥️♥️ o(≧o≦)o

And all that day is that I remember the boys were Asian, Mexican, or white cannot remember. The girl was black (sorry if you do get offended) And my yellow sweater thatnwas my favorite and my dark blue leggings.

But this art is important and inspired by that.

This isn't fake, nor a lie, and I hope people who experience these kinds of things heal or get help♥️

You. Are. Not. Alone ♥️

(P.S: I know not coming out about this is terrible, but I've always been bad at speaking especially since I'm an only child and and autistic but able to do most things, forgot what's that called. But I'm not blaming those two things I'm blaming the people who have hurt me and made me realize things. Too many at a young age, and I may do more vent art posts!♥️ and remember you aren't ever alone talk to someone at home, get help, or talk to the hotline for comfort if you do! I repeat if you do feel comfortable doing that!!♥️♥️. Goodbye thanks for reading some of my young trama (does that count as trama? Idk). ♥️♥️♥️)

[blackstarchanx3new]

FSR rambles PT

PART. 3 BABY OF BEING CRINGY ABOUT MY OWN AU

LET'S GOOOOOO (Big send of too this chapter, holy shit)

Lol so like: One thing I didn't wanna do was suppress how much Zelda meant to Shadow Link's character arc for the sake of Vidow "Working".

Shadow Link does love Zelda FYI our mans is Bi. Idk if you noticed...but this whole comic is just polycule central there's no shipping wars, you can ship everyone basically. X'D

Zelda was a huge role in Shadow Link's character development to being a good boy, so it's only natural he's attached to her. (This will also be shown in the next chapter...Hehe)

Also the way his emotions around Vio are so charged that the best way he can put it to words is Vio is "Really cool" is like, so dumbly sweet. Bro can't properly even word how much he adores this man.

Shadow Link has made it no secret he wants to be buds with Vio for reals this time, and he's also 100% not interested in helping Gannon. So...There really ISN'T a reason Vio and him should have the same issues Vio was worried about. Thus, he tries to sooth Vio's fears.

*cough cough cough* gay. Shadow Link's so anxious about asking.

Lol so I got a "Writing rule" for Vio...He ain't gonna cry till I crack him completely like an egg. X'D He will get very close tho: Like this moment.

The way I put blush on the nose area specifically indicates someone's like, close to crying or is crying. I just like this face particularly because there's so much shit going on in that head of his.

The start of the hug is so damn awkward (Intentionally so)

These panels mean so much to meeeeeeee-

Everything about em

The hug, Vio's so close his face is squished (He's so adorable.)

Shadow Link doesn't immediately hug him back he's stunned.

Hehehehe. Vidow go brrrrr..

This entire page is just: PAIN.

Shadow breaks the hug to show him the book.

The wording leaves it so ya can't help but think he hoped the introducing of their friendship would change Vio's mind about being Link again...That his words earlier were just mad ramblings and not how he actually felt. But with a clear head Vio verbally says he still wants to be Link again.

Lmao bro tries not to crack again aaaaand fails.

The book is one about healing magic...What kinds are in there I wonder. ;) A refrence...to a past Selda game mayhaps?~

Also this frame of Shadow Link full blown ugly crying while pretending to be fine is so hilarious to me idk if it comes off as sad or funny but it's kinda both to me. X'D

Mans is crying for him and Vio at this point.

Vio putting the book down in favor of comforting Shadow Link is just kinda one of those things that like, if he had ignored Shadow Link the reader would have noticed, but him being like, decent is smth that isn't nearly as "noticeable" (Like, ya typically notice a character being shitty WAY MORE than you notice all the subtle things they do that are just, kind.)

Also Shadow still wants to be helpful even though he's like, sobbing his eyes out. X'D

He also tries to hide from Vio lmao. Vio saw the water works bro.

Quite a few things:

Shadow's still toxic, just a little. X'D He WANTS Vio around, he misses him like crazy and does not want him to leave, AT ALL. This is very obvious lmao.

But he's also at the point where he knows he can do better than just screaming and throwing tantrums like he did as a kid. But his true feelings about how betrayed he feels Vio still wants to be Link are STILL THERE. Even if he chooses to try and hide them.

Also funny detail: Vio blushing was a lowkey gag because of the whole "They're both attracted to red flags" joke.

You could also take it as him being scared shitless, which he IS.

While he can't take back snapping at Vio, he certainly realizes his mistake very quickly and apologizes. So that's SOMETHING at least. (Considering the type of person he was before, a relapse or two is expected lmao.) I think him still having a certain level of anger management issues makes his character overall more interesting.

I like to think the only reason Vio gave him any patience for that, was because Shadow Link has been nothing but patient and there for him all night and he knows Shadow is emotional as fuck.

As Vio gave him shit for the fight with Blue earlier showed, Vio doesn't tolerate Shadow's crap when he's just being a violent shithead.

Hahaha. Remember when Link outright stated Vio wanted to be Vio and not Link. :) Link sure is a way more reliable narrator than...idk...The guy who lies...

*Whispers gently into your ear* Vio's not being very truthful here...

Notice: He only. ONLY brings up "Logical" reason...not his actual FEELINGS on the matter... He SAYS "I don't want to be Vio"

WHY. WHY!? TELL US WHY VIO!!!

He does have a reason but he's not tellin' lmao.

So, in the book it's not really...SPECIFIED where Shadow Link came from? Like I think all it says is "Gannon drew him out of the dark mirror"

...THAT IS SO UP FOR INTERPRETATION AND BRINGS UP SO MANY QUESTIONS:

Did he have a life in the dark world and was just, TOLD to do Gannon's bidding? His line of "I'm your living reflection in the dark world" MAYBE supports this idea...??? KINDA?

But my issue with that is: Shadow Link gives NO indication he has had a past in the dark world, like...at all. Nothing. No mention of family (Which...Reasonably wouldn't he have a dark version of Link's father???) He's the ONLY PERSON who's implied to be FROM the dark world. Also...The dark mirror isn't REALLY implied to be a PORTAL... The seal on Vaati and his demons was, but Shadow Link wasn't freed from that, Gannon "Drew him from the dark mirror" to release Vaati...So uh...HMMMM His also distinct lack of his OWN name kinda makes me go ???? Like...His NAME is Shadow Link...Like that's not a nickname. That's his NAME. (Like this just weirds me out because of a cannon "Reflection" of Link: in Ravio. Who like...HAS HIS OWN NAME???? ik Ravio isn't from the "Dark world", he's from Lowrule, but point still stands this is odd.)

Suffice to say, there's just not enough info here to draw a conclusion for me? So I gotta make shit up. X'D Shadow Link was created out of Link's Shadow by Gannon in FSR. This is also the reason he resembles a Gerudo male. Cause Gannon said "Mm yes, my evil Link sona will have my heritage. UwU"

Shadow link realizing he almost made Vio cry is so funny to me.

Vio looks so fucking pathetic there. lmfao.

Shadow's words only hit again like Link has stated: Shadow knows Vio

Whether intentionally or not: what he says hits Vio like a ton of bolders.

He's very hesitant to keep talking though because he doesn't want to hurt Vio either.

It's like, he's AWARE he's telling Vio this shit because he WANTS him to stay, but you also can't deny Shadow's at least CORRECT in a lot of his statements. How far should he push that though? Hmm.

His "Oh my god you're an idiot" face is hilarious. Shadow's like "You still don't get what I'm laying down dude??? REALLY!?"

*Explodes*

Lmao. That panel before they kiss is basically my favorite in the entire comic rn. X'D

Shadow pulling away and squishing Vio's face is also a favorite. Vio's just cute and squishable.

Vio stating the obvious: That his mental breakdown wasn't Shadow's fault. (Wasn't really anybody's fault it was inevitable, especially with the curse/Dark Link active)

Lmao. Vio's kinda dumb as bricks sometimes too. X'D

Shadow Link's fucking deadpan stare while Vio rants is so hilarious to me. Also the direct quoting of Vio instead of paraphrasing making his statement sound even more stupid.

Also fun dialogue thing: You'll notice the characters stutter or like, pause weirdly, Because I like writing dialogue a little more realistic. Like Shadow Starts off as "I-was" instead of like "W-was" like he thought of saying smth completely different at first or his mouth moved before his brain did. X'D

Their banter is fun, Vio's his sassy self. Shadow giving him all the kisses we desired...

Okay ngl this page hurts me X'D Like. Ouch. All of it hurts.

Because of how Link kinda abandoned Shadow Link (Even though he was always there) Shadow is OBVIOUSLY very hesitant to let go. It's super obvious Vio doesn't wanna let go either.

Also Vio kissing him back surprises Shadow. X'D He's still bamboozled Vio is receptive to his affection oof... (Would like to show him getting more comfy with it as the comic goes on like "Holy shit, nah he's not playing around with me he fr-")

They mean so much to each other. QuQ

Okay to make you laugh in these very serious panels: Because Shadow's floating Vio's standing on his tip toes.

On that note, can't wait to see yall for the next chapter, whenever I get around to it. X'D

[taegularities]

Wait I wanna know more about the guy who fucked up, if you feel comfortable of course

Do we need to bring our pitchforks or just hate mail ⚔️

wait i'm actually... ksjdksad i don't like talking about someone like that, but i do need to vent, if that's okay? jkdshkasf i've been bottling it up and only talked about it properly to my mom and dad :'')

the first few weeks, he was really sweet? like he'd buy me gifts and compliment me and tell me how much he admired my personality. i think he's not a bad person per se, but he's extremely old-fashioned and narrow-minded.

i saw the first red flag when he called me and ended up speaking about marriage. which is okay, you know. like, i'm alright with being open right from the beginning. but that convo brought in a few very strange happenings in the following few weeks, which included but aren't limited to

him asking, "you're not one of those girls who'd wanna wait for years after marriage before having children, right?".. i tell him, well yes, i am. do you want kids right away or? and he says.. "9 months isn't right away." ok.

him saying he's too lazy to clean his apartment, and "how about i pick you up, bring you here, go away for the weekend and when i come back, you'll have it all cleaned!"

him offending my entire occupation that i studied for for years, because he had a bad experience with people in that department. i understand, but i did tell him not all of us are the same, and he said "idc, they don't deserve any respect", which essentially means that i don't either.

him looking at me weird when i said that tom holland's lip sync battle is one of my all-time-favourite videos on yt and then telling me, "but it's gay af." and just generally not being a fan of the lgbtiqa+ community.

him saying that once he's a dad, he'll be strict and not allow his kids to do anything. he just? talked about having kids a lot? even told me, when i almost choked on smoking hot food, "don't die, i still need like 3 kids from you"

and what made me abandon him for good: i asked him why he's always so excited about marriage, which is okay, but just wanna know! he says people usually want to get married bc they love their partner, but idk why... for me it's cos i want kids. in that case, i noticed he wasn't there for me, but just bc i'm fertile (or so i hope)

that day, i said he should want a girl for more than that. he said, "i know, after all you're not a child factory". i tell him yup that's right... and he proceeds to joke, as he called all his offensive shit, "but you could be." and that's where i bid him goodbye.

there goes. i was in a strange mood after that? i think i even dipped from tumblr for a moment. my parents were a bit worried, but then i realised that i felt a lot better without him. god i'm not ready for relationships lmao, but i won't fight love. when it happens, it happens... so fingers crossed for something better <3

[spikrock]

my mad t party lgbt hcs explained

very messy post below! some are genuine reasonings and others are just "yeah haha trust me bro"

tarrant: bisexual & nonbinary

i mean for all the bi characters the hc is pretty self explanatory, i mean look at them yknow. hes a little too fruity with mally and thackery 🤨 but tarrant and alice are literally bi4bi couple of all time as for the nonbinary hc, i dont know! id like to know if anyone else sees him this way or if its just me :) hes just got too much enby swag 

alice: bisexual & trans

its all spiderwebs fault!!!!!!! it made her gay!!!!!!!!! /j but seriously, kissing ladypillar and different numbers such ho hey (you know how every now and then theyll switch alice standing with mally to someone else like thackery or absolem, the few times she did it with ladypillar are so funny because they cant rhyme the pronouns 😭). also ik this sounds silly but i really appreciate that in the mtp shows once ladypillar was added they didnt stop doing spiderwebs or change it to be like “haha were both girls 😵‍💫blehh this is so weird 😂”/play it off as a joke or anything because they very easily could have done that. shes trans. i already made that post with her and mally but again, if shes not trans then why is her color palette blue and pink? checkmate liberals. 

thackery: bisexual & bigender

yeah hes bi i dont know what else to say he and mally are in love frfr i actually just completely made up bigender. made it up, i dont know where i got it from i just remember early february drawing mad t party on my laptop and suddenly thinking “bigender thackery” and its stuck with me since then. (the two genders i hc him with are male/female though so) i wouldnt say he feels just one or the other, he feels both at the same time

mally: bisexual & trans

he is top ten bisexuals of all time,, whenever they do the pretender and tarrant and alice stand on either side of him and take turns singing he is DYING. passing away HE IS TRANSGENDER!!!!!!! we all know it. instead of coming out as trans he made up some crazy story about being killed in a war and then coming back as a man 🙄/j hes just dramatic like that

chessur: gay & trans

haha this is mostly because of @thatrandomartistjavi's hcs xd chessur is special in the sense that hes the only mtp character that never really gets a chance to flirt with anyone else since hes always hiding behind that drumset. from what ive seen he was shipped with dinah a lot, presumably just cuz theyre both cats since they rarely interact, so ive never really understood it :p i usually hc cheshire cats as nonbinary/something under that umbrella but this guy gives me transgender vibes. idk

absolem/ladypillar(? dont know if she ever got a real name): lesbian & trans

shes very much a lesbian. just. just like yeah. i think the most prominent character that she flirts with (other than alice) is mally. from what ive seen it only really happens when its el dormouse on stage but before i started seeing that i always saw mally/absolem/thackery as like, a trio. i mean obviously everyone in the band are friends, but idk. i have lots of drawings of those three hanging out so maybe thats just something my delusional brain has completely made up. but anyway the point is i dont ship those two and i sort of see them with a more sibling dynamic. mally always holds her back when shes trying to touch the little castle music box thing, at the end of sets he’ll pull her antennae to take her off stage/she'll pull him by his scarf, etc. (also theres a clip where she kisses him on the cheek and as they begin to walk off stage she turns to the crowd and mouths “no” and does the throat slitting gesture thing which makes me think theyre sorta just playing around :p)

sooo in a post a while back i said i hc her as genderfluid but ive changed my mind?? actually before i made that post i headcanoned her as trans but then switched to genderfluid and now ive uhh changed my mind again. im very indecisive like that and very easily swayed on my opinions haha,,, @ticktockteapot's metaphor for her “becoming the beautiful butterfly she was always meant to be” is very nice i like it lots. also the fact that ladypillar has a much higher stage presence than absolem (obviously not including the spiderwebs number…or crazypillar) was always so sweet to me cuz like,,,aw shes finally more comfortable being herself and performing :’)

tl;dr none of them are straight none of them are cis. happy pride month and thank you for coming to my TED talk

[healyh8ter]

just saw your take on the podcast and i agree. feel like even if it is satirical which some people are saying it is, there is a line and that line was crossed.

i’ve seen online that the hosts are jewish and gay so people were saying them two were allowed to make their jokes abt jewish ppl and gay ppl but honestly idk i try and stay off stan twitter because everything is taken out of context i never know what’s a good source.

listened to the whole episode myself and i only laughed once and it happened to be at matty getting caught jacking off because god that is just awkward. after that, there wasn’t anything funny in the actual episode and even if we’re all “a bunch of snowflake twitter stans” as we’re being called online like i’d rather that than be a bigot tbh.

are you staying away from the situation or are you actively debating it? i tried to share my thoughts on twitter but was told i do not understand satirical comedy or what centre-left politics are (even though i’m one of the most political and educated people you’ll meet) by some man so i left twitter for today.

not sure what to do because i am a massive fan of their music and hold it extremely close to me, it’s also my special interest as an autistic person and hard to give up easily- any advice? :)

hey there, im glad we agree on things and most people seem to agree with my take on here.

about the hosts being gay and jewish i have no clue but im literally a gay man and some of the comments he made about gay men i personally wasn’t offended? i just dont wanna be offended by such immature jokes. however everyones feelings are valid because some of the other jokes were pretty vile. im definitely not taking away from how women and other poc mentioned must feel right now. Its not great. i see u all and how horrible u must feel. im really sorry.

i agree about the twitter thing, stay outta there!! alot of information and statments wont be true or they’ll be twisted and also twitters just stressful as a whole, i saw incels attacking the 1975twt and alot ppl had to go private.

the podcast REALLY WASNT FUNNY, truly i don’t get the humour in it at alllll. i literally felt pure embarrassment and just cringed multiple times really did feel like a teenage boy conversation.

OH MY GOD! i get u about the special interest thing, it’s literally why i made this blog. i’d say dont bother debating especially on twitter. no matter what you’ll say someone will have an offhand comment to say and its not worth it. whatever you think is right stick by that. but if u do debate please be mindful of everyone and how they feel.

i know im definitely not abandoning this blog or my interest im just gonna stay vigilant of what part of the band i am supporting, i support the music and the art they make and even some points matt’s made in the past have been really good!!. i just don’t support certain things mattys said or done before and now. i’ve been a fan for a long while so theres alot i’ve stuck through in terms of matty being stupid. getting flashbacks to 2021

anyways i say do what u personally think is right. just stay respectful and mindful of others in the process!

[gladiolidiaries]

Okay so…looking at moon’s blog the consensus is that drellama is a thing based on 50% delusion but also combined with the tweets dream made around that time and her insta captions.

Then you, hata and nal are so convinced shes a friend and nothing is going on and hes just there for drusic. So like im just confused on why youre SO sure that nothing is going on. Bc im gonna be completely honest im a dnfolo and even though i think something is going on with dnf im side eyeing this situation and idk what to think. The only thing against it for me is that she lives in LA and he hates LA but who knows? She could move to florida and shes also an e girl which is his type. Idk…

Hes a grown ass man he can do what he wants (not to say he is 100% involved with her) but my dnfer heart is just like meh. Also my delusions are making me think that knf snap was posted pointedly for the intricate rituals.

Ok first off i think it's completely stupid to link Dream's main "George and I are not gay" tweet to this girl. Even if he was legit talking to her, why would he need to tweet (ON MAIN) that he isn't gay like 😭 she would know that he's into her if they were e-flirting and things were mutual. The tweet was a big fat joke.

I can obviously not know for sure if something is going on, I'm basing my opinion with what we know. Which is :

She is a small content creator and is acquainted with Sylvee, Hannah and Sapnap (also with some NRG dudes, she was just at some NRG event on March 4th a day before he followed her)

Dream was most likely invited to that party by Scotty, we have no proof that she actually came with him. It's possible she was there with someone else but saw Dream and ended up mostly speaking to him so she also came to Scotty's place. That's very normal.

Dream is in LA to work on his music.

Tbh at the end of the day it all comes down to your own perspective of Dream. I personally have a hard time imagining him as a hook up type of guy. Maybe he is! But from what we have know of that evening, I don't think it happened. I really think she met him at the party and they stuck together because she's friends with some of his friends and she's a content creator/small streamer.

[clarysageoilfacialmassage]

One of the ladies I've been talking to, I haven't seen in a week. Last time I saw her was the first time I met her, and she offered me somewhere to stay during the hurricane while my power was out. I slept on the couch, knowing myself well, and not wanting to get too deep too quickly because I really was enjoying our conversation leading up to meeting. She smoked me out, we got to know each other, we jelled really well. She's a crazy talkative person, and I did feel like I was getting to know her better than the other way around. It was cool, she was really excited. No big

The next day, when I left her house, I was a double so I'm getting off at 5 am, and although she did offer her place to me if I needed it at all until my power was back on, she has a kid and I wasn't gonna ride my bike 3 miles to show up to her spot so late. Disrespectful and not how I move. Getting off my double, I ran into another lady I'm somewhat involved with. She offered me to stay at her place so I did. It was convenient and just worked out the best that way.

The rest of the week I'm working, obviously, and our main way of communication is Messenger. She was verbal about being super independent and not needing people to be in her life to feel validated, so hearing that I'm thinking "She seems secure in herself and is understanding. My communication needs work overall, but she seems to get that I am busy with my three jobs so if my communication is lacking, it won't be a huge deal. She gets it."

I go out of town this weekend, living my life as normal, because we are not dating or even an item. Had such a wonderful time. Not worried about how I'm making her feel, because again, she came across much more chill than the freakout type, and we are not an item. I guess it needs to be disclosed, I am her first girl crush, as she put it. She has only been with men before.

So then I get back into town yesterday, I hop on Facebook for a minute just to scroll the timeline. I see something from her about feeling ugly or something. I don't interact, but had a feeling it was due to me not being in touch over the course of a week. I got off after that, and had seen she sent me 8 messages. Did not open those. It is taxing and takes a lot of energy to talk to her for me.

Tonight after work, I hop on the timeline, hit her page and she's made a post about not kink shaming but that ignoring someone for a week is crazy. Knowing she is talking about me. And that honestly just turned me off. Not every single thing that crosses your mind, or is your business, has to be blasted on social. I also already knew that was how she moved before we started talking, so that is my blunder for thinking our business would be treated any differently.

But am I crazy? Like I've been living my life, dealing with the hurricane and working to save for my NZ move in two months. And she knows I am a busy person, she made jokes about my 27 jobs. We never set another solid time to hang, and I never told her when I'd hit her back but that I would when I can (have the energy to keep up with her conversation, and be in a place where I don't have to wake up for my 7 am job, requiring me to sleep early, as our convos have gone late into the night). And here she is blasting me for not responding yet on account of living... Like this is not who you portrayed yourself to be to me. And all this you not feeling good enough has nothing to do with me, really. And it's not my problem to fix.

I can't help feeling bad, but I also know I'm feeling that way because I've struggled through my marriage putting their needs far before my own and setting boundaries for myself. Idk I guess I just needed to write this. Gay friends, do I suck?

[spirngakawening]

Once again reminiscing over Hamlet in yr12 Lit Studies.

We wanted to properly cast roles and act it out as we read it, so our teacher gave us role preference sheets

I put Hamlet as my top preference because it would've been SO gender. And I was unopposed, so I indeed read for Hamlet! And it was very gender 😎

P sure my second preference was Horatio because - and I don't think this is acknowledged enough - Horatio is ALSO very gender. Like,,, he's a nerd he's the sensible foil to his best friend's chaos he's HORATIO.

The classmate who ended up reading for Horatio happened to be a girl who I thought was v cool and aesthetically attractive agahsjdlmdvsl 💀 I refrained from joking to her about hamratio because I didn't wanna make her uncomfortable*

But like we all saw the hamratio when we watched the David Tenant version of the final scene agshdlf

*(this girl was the only one who hadn't considered that Dorian Gray and Basil Howard might be gay - even the churchgoers thought they were gay!! But also this girl had The Song of Achilles on her bookshelf so idk what to make of that. Regardless, I couldn’t figure out a good way to joke with her about it and was never gonna be shooting any shots anyway. I wasn't out as anything in hs and I've never been too fussed about dating. I didn't fully realise that I probably had a crush on her - I'd never had a non-boy crush at this point. ANYWAY,)

My third preference was Polonius because he's funny and ironically verbose. As someone who is verbose, and existentially contradictory, I can relate. I thought it'd be a fun role to play with if I wasn't Hamlet or Horatio.

But, since I did read for Hamlet, I had the hilarious experience of mime-stabbing a classmate through a blanket and dragging him "off-stage"... his legs still moving to assist in the dragging made for great physical comedy

The guy holding the blanket-tapestry doubled as the actor for king hamlet's ghost, with the same blanket as his ghost costume lol

Fortinbras brought the exact 'okay I just walked in on something here' energy that she needed to at the end

I think Rosencrantz and Guildenstern didn't really wanna be there... which honestly fit their characters! V much 'uhh I'm just here to do my job but I'm not paid for THIS' vibes

Our teacher, legend he is, recited 'to be or not to be' from memory - some classmates kept track and noted like, one minor error in his whole recitation. Slightly disappointing that I didn't get to read that part, but it was hella impressive and fun to witness

I can't remember which section it was, but once, near the end of the day, a classmate I really respected complimented how I read one of Hamlet's sections and I will never forget that, I will remember how that moment felt forever and ever

Very glad we didn't have to read out the full scene between Hamlet and Gertrude before Polonius dies (all the psych students in the room, including myself, were cursing Sigmund Freud after discussing that scene). Also glad we didn't read many scenes between Hamlet and Ophelia. I would've felt so bad talking to my classmates like that 💀

For our final lesson of reading Hamlet, we went to the multipurpose room and our teacher brought props

I clashed broomsticks with Laertes (who was much more focused on the swordfighting than I was, I was just trying to read my lines man), Gertrude had her chalice, I took the plastic crown from Claudius' head after he sipped grape juice from our teacher's 'mug life' mug, and Horatio kinda just stood at a distance reading her lines during our final conversation, maybe coming to kneel beside me as I died?

It was brilliant.