#idk if it would even show up on an x-ray just because the shards have been so tiny

[lady-harrowhark]

if i had a nickel for every time i pulled a fragment of bone out of my jaw, i’d have two nickels. which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice.

[btsslowburnfic]

BTBY Chapter 12

Story Summary: For Namjoon, the moment he set his sights on being the #1 rapper, he pushed the symbol to the side and hated it. Love should be chosen, not forced on you. He didn’t believe in fate and this mark on his wrist was a big “fuck you” to all that.

Chapter Summary: Your fianc�� is nowhere to be found; Namjoon returns to the hospital. 

Previous Chapter found here

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He easily  found his way back to your hospital room since he had just left, he stands in the doorway and waits as he hears you yelling,

“Where the fuck is he???” 

“Babe I don’t know. Ok? The nurses called and I called and Gina called. Maybe he’s passed out. He was here for like 3 days sleeping on that chair ok?” Xavier is trying to pacify you.

“I was in a fucking coma do you think I give a shit about that?” you respond angrily.

“Honey, you are also fucking high as a kite right now and also in pain. Let’s take some deep breaths.” Xavier starts doing some meditation exercises. Usually you would be all on board but your brain feels itchy, you can’t even put that many words together. “I wish I was fucking high right now. Namjoon flew here from London and he doesn’t even like me, why the fuck can’t my fiancé answer the goddamn phone?” you yell while crying. You know you were sad and angry and pathetic but you didn’t care.

Xavier sees Namjoon waiting in the doorway, “Ok sweetie. I hear that you are angry and have some shit going on from your brain hitting a car windshield. I’m going to go to your apartment and investigate OK? I'll bring back coffee. "

“No. No. Don’t you fucking leave me alone here. They keep saying shit to me and I can’t keep up with them because my brain isn’t working and I don’t know what’s happening.” you say very sad and angrily. You have been struggling for the past few hours as doctors and nurses and a police officer have come in to try and talk to you and you just woke up and you don’t know what is going on. Goddamn your brain feels itchy. 

“I’m not leaving you alone, I’m passing you off to this guy who doesn’t like you. He doesn’t like you so much he flew in from London and then came to the hospital within minutes because of how much he doesn’t like you,” Xavier's voice is dripping with sarcasm as he waves to Namjoon and walks over. “Thanks dude. As you can tell, our little [Y/N] is having an emotional and crazy time at the moment. Idk why they thought swarming her with the cops and like ten doctors in the past hour was a smart idea, but here we are. I’m going to see what the fuck is going on with Ben." 

"That's no problem. Is there anything I should know before the doctor or nurses come?"

Xavier thinks for a moment," It was a hit and run. It’s an active police case. The car hit her so hard she has shards embedded into her skull. Like her actual fucking face bones.” 

"Oh my God." 

"Yeah, she's lucky to be alive. Alright, I'm off to play fucking Nancy Drew." Xavier excuses himself. 

“Hey,” Namjoon said, walking into the room.

“Nooooo….” you whimper.

“What, you don’t want me here?” Namjoon says, feeling an ache in his chest.

“I didn’t want anyone to bother you,” you start sobbing. This wasn’t his problem. He already had his week turned upside down by you being in the hospital.

“It’s no trouble. I just had to run back to the hotel and grab my phone charger.” he lies, “I was coming back anyway.” Namjoon sits down on the bed next to you.

“Really?” you say, trying to sound normal but it’s still a messy sad sound.

“Really, I’m afraid to let you out of my sight honestly. Carelessly getting hit by cars.” he says, rubbing your arm.

“It was just one car.” You correct him, he laughs. “I don’t remember anything.” You say quietly. “The police came and asked me a bunch of questions but I have no idea. I was on my way from work to pick up lunch and that’s the last thing I can remember.” 

Namjoon sighs and looks down, feeling guilty for how selfish he’s been this past week. “That’s ok sweetheart, you’ll remember some things with time. Otherwise, I’m sure a business or something has cctv recording or something.” 

“Yeah,” you respond. “I’m sorry. I know this whole thing is awkward. And my brain is a little off right now. My veins feel itchy.”

“Yeah, that’s the pain medication. Don't worry about being awkward, You’re fine..”

“Umm Ok then, can I ask what Ben and you talked about?  last night. The nurse mentioned both of you were here and talking to each other”

Namjoon feels a tightness in his chest and he pushes past it, “Umm yeah...I explained to Ben that I was your soulmate. At first Ben didn’t believe us but we showed him our wrists. He was confused and I think a little mad because you hadn’t told him. He said he was going home to take a shower and I told him he should also rest because he actually looked like shit.” He pauses for effect,  “Not like us. We still look really good when we’re tired, he looked rough, like bad,” he explains, you can tell he is trying to make you laugh. You give him a smile. “I told him that when we met you told me you had  a boyfriend and didn't care about the soulmate thing.” Namjoon adds.

“Yeah,” you say because you don’t know what else to do.

A Doctor comes into the room. “Hi, I’m Dr. Reid. I’m one of the surgeons here and I was just wanting to show you a few x-rays of your skull if that would be ok?” 

“Are you feeling up to that?” Namjoon turns to ask you.

“Yeah I think so,” you sit up a little more and Namjoon moves back over to his own seat. He takes out his phone. Rude, you think. The doctor pulls up the x-rays and shows you the shrapnel that is still in your skull. He explains that there is no reason to remove it and that it shouldn't cause any long term issues but if it does, a small surgery could be done to remove it. You thank him and he leaves.

“Ugh there is no way I’m going to remember all of that,” you whine as you sit back. Just listening to that had been exhausting.

“It’s ok, I took notes,” Namjoon flashes you his phone screen where he had diligently written down the information. He also had notes in there about the medications the nurses had given you since last night. 

You feel tears in your eyes. Fuck. Fuck. You feel your heart warming itself to him and you have fought so hard this past year to keep this from happening. “Thanks,” you say.

“What’s wrong?” he puts his phone away and walks over to you.

“I can’t tell you,” you squeak out.

“Is it about Ben? I’m sure it’s weird talking to your soulmate about your fiancé.” Namjoon sighs and gets up to walk around. You feel sadness in your body that wasn’t there before. 

“No. It’s not. It’s just. It’s weird having you here and being nice to me. I never thought I was going to see you again and here you are. And you are being so kind.”

Namjoon stops and puts his hands on his hips, “Yeah. The whole thing is pretty strange. I can go back to being a total asshole if you want?” he turns, putting on a very gruff expression.

“Hmm you know usually that would make me feel better, but I think I’m too tired today to keep up with your asshole wit. Maybe tomorrow you can work your way back into it.”

“Why don’t you try to get some sleep. I’ll stick around in case the doctor’s or nurses need something.”

You look out the window. It seems weird that it’s so sunny and bright when it’s so cold and strange inside. What the fuck was going on with you two. This made your head hurt as much as the shrapnel in your “face bones,” as Xavier had so delicately explained.

You hear Namjoon sigh and walk back over. He’s scrolling through his phone.

“What’s wrong?” you ask, starting to feel drowsy.

“Ah it’s nothing. Just reviews from the show coming in. We had to decide whether or not to postpone performances or for the band to perform without us. I’m telling Taehyung to head back. I’ll meet up with them In Amsterdam.” 

You instantly feel terrible. It’s your fault he wasn’t able to perform. “Shouldn't you join him?”

“I’m still not 100%. In case you didn’t realize. . If I’m going to miss out on performing I might as well be here.” he says nonchalantly. 

“I’m sorry.” you squeak out as tears are falling down your face. The medication and head trauma have made you emotional. You don’t normally cry so easily. “I’m sorry for getting hit by a car.”

“Oh my God, stop it, you sound ridiculous.” he responds. Normally you would have the energy to insult him back but not today. You just try not to cry and end up crying more. 

“Hey, it’s ok. Really. You know what? I could use the break. I haven’t had a day off in months.” he gets up and brings you some tissues. “Really. It’s fine. The fans understand. They are just worried. The producers know what’s going on. The guys are just glad that we’re both ok. It’s really not a big deal. Let’s focus on getting you better.” he says as he strokes your soulmark. “Don’t worry. When you’re all better I’ll make sure to make you feel terrible about all this,” he smiles at you.

You laugh into your tissue so the snot doesn’t go everywhere. You are a nasty mess. Why is this hot man talking to you and trying to cheer you up? You are also exhausted. Your eyes burn. You close them for a second to feel some relief and it becomes increasingly hard to keep them up. You hear Namjoon, “That’s right sweetheart, rest up. I’m not going anywhere right now.”

Namjoon plugs his phone into the wall. He’s sent messages off to the rest of the team about the schedules and takes a deep breath as he’s sure the news of his missing a few concerts will have repercussions. Oh well. He can’t leave you here like this. Part of him wishes he could, but something in his very essence has changed over the past few hours. He finds himself rubbing his soulmark and wondering how he ever thought about getting it removed. NEXT CHAPTER

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