#idk if i'll get to post much about it bc 1) idk if i work that day yet and 2) i HIGHLY doubt i will have a drawing

[shirogane-oushirou]

[cw vent: chronic illness, general world politics mention w no detail)

"man. i'm so tired. i feel like i can't do anything selfship related. is it because my energy's been sapped from family visiting and everyone wanting to do ~summer activities~ nonstop? am i so in my head about "getting ren's story right without stepping over any lines" that i've backed myself into a perfectionist corner? is the world just going to shit so hard that i can't have one (1) minute of escape on this blog before going back to working through the political hellscape we're in? god even trying to make this plushie pattern is killing me even though i want to hold my guy So Badly AUGH."

/finishes the plushie pattern after trying multiple body bases and literally buying a japanese ebook about plushie face and hair design/

"actually what if i lived forever and spent all of that time making an army of these fuckers to swim in? what then?"

[risingsunresistance]

hourlytechno posted something from the resistance so casual reminder. Soon 👀

[thehugmonster]

Reading this and realising that I've somehow convinced myself that I'd be completely unsuitable to parenthood because I'm quiet, don't talk a lot, find it difficult to act silly and goofy and playful in the way that lots of young children want you to play with them, and because I often find it too difficult to be strict with kids about harmless things and say no the way I would of it were an adult asking me the same things (eg. yes you can see my sketchbook, yes you can colour with me, yes you can watch YouTube with me (and use up all my data in the process), yes, I'll play with you even though I'm tired as long as you have fun, etc. and none of these things are considered "motherly" enough (by certain people in my family, but especially by my mother) for me to be a good mother. Also I have boundaries and want kids to grow up while I also respect my own boundaries (so they can see what it's like, coming from someone raised by a mother with little to no boundaries and a people pleaser) and this is considered to be a "boring, fun-spoiling" thing by above-mentioned people. And I somehow internalised that and thought that I'd be a bad mother because of it, and that it should be better for me to just not have kids at all than to be a "fun-spoiling and boring" mother, such that my kids would prefer having someone else mother them (like my mother, as she said so herself). And it's just. Completely fucking wrong??? Like!

Where are the introvert mothers who are still good mothers and the mothers with strong boundaries who don't lose their sense of self in having to take care of their kids and put their kids as the sun their world revolves around while simultaneously forgetting that they're a whole entire entity on their own with their own needs that has to be met too, the parents who work on their own trauma and don't project that onto their children, or have children as a retirement plan, or want to raise their kid into the best version of the person that kid will be and not for the purpose of providing emotional support and validation to the parent.

Like I'm sure they exist, just not around me. Which is probably why I believed this for so long. But! Being a good parent has got nothing to do with personality and everything to do with kindness and compassion! Aka a human trait, and a trait which I have an abundance of! (And sometimes I have too much of it, hence the need for strong boundaries lest I become too people-pleasy)

Which basically means that I can be a good mother if I ever want to be!!

Man, fuck all the bullshit I learned and internalized as a result of other people's preconceived notions about what is needed to be a good mother/parent!! I can be a good parent if I want to be, mother, take that! Stop telling me I'm failing/going to fail just because I'm not like you!

weird how people think nowadays there’s like…a very specific personality type you have to be to be a mother instead of capacity for motherhood being a default trait almost all of the female population possesses. should having a child just be a thing that someone does by default without considering it? no. but also having children is not something your personality makes you fundamentally unsuited for 9/10 times, mothers have all types of personalities, the most important traits for childraising are unselfishness and kindness and everyone should cultivate those in themselves no matter what anyway regardless of whether or not they have children.

this also applies to men but ive never seen anyone say "it’s okay for men not to be fathers because it wouldn’t make any sense to their personality".

[moviecritc]

✦ ˚ : · STARRY EYES ⋆ MAX VERSTAPPEN 🦢

pairing ☆ max verstappen x museum guide! reader

summary ☆ where max has been visiting van gogh's museum almost every week because he's crushing over a museum guide there

warnings ☆ jokes about going back to your country (reader is spanish)

masterlist | letterboxd

❛ these chemicals hit my like white wine❜

yourusername 🔒 just posted!

liked by bestie1, friend2 and 103 others

yourusername too many dumb blonds here

view all comments

bestie1 shut up tourist

yourusername shut me bestie1 omw 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

friend1 you're so annoying

friend2 go back to your country we don't want you here

y/nmom que fotos más bonitas!! papá dice que te hecha de menos y yo también 💓💓 (such beautiful photos!! dad says that he miss you and me too)

yourusername te echo muchísimo de menos, ma 💓💓💓 (i miss you so so much, mom)

friend3 too many dumb blonds for you to fuck and don't have aids*

yourusername OH SHUT UP

f1gossip just posted!

liked by user1, user2 and 9,491 others

f1gossip One follower informed us that Max Verstappen was seen the other day at the Van Gogh's museum in Amsterdam with a mysterious girl who probably works there. Sources say that it's the second or even third time he's around there.

view all comments

user3 does anyone know who this girl is?

user4 the downfall of max is starting and i'm here for it

user5 it's literally just a girl, go touch some grass user6 probably they aren't even dating

user7 someone find my a pic of her face and i find her in 5

user8 there's none sadly

user9 he probably just likes the museum and was asking for directions

user10 the first time! he's an usual now

bestie1 loool

yourusername just posted a story!

[caption 1: wish me luck little fuckers] [caption 2: chin chin] (spanish expression for cheers)

replies

bestie1 i can't believe you're on a date with THE max verstappen and that you didn't even know who he was

yourusername 🤷

maxverstappen1 just posted on his story!

replies

user11 IS THAT THE GIRL FROM THE MUSEUM??

user12 SOFT LAUNCHING WHOOOO

user13 STOP gatekeeping her from us

user14 show her face pleasee, show it to me rachel

maxverstappen1 just posted!

liked by redbullracing, yourusername and 134,923 others

maxverstappen1 P1 at Spielberg! What a lovely race 🦁

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user15 max + his fist = perfect combo

user16 simply lovely

user17 get that 4x wdc

yourusername amazingg 💥 liked by author

user18 is this the girl? user19 i believe so user20 she's supportive i like her

user18 🦁🧡

yourusername just posted a story!

[caption: 📍MoMa]

replies

bestie1 bro is casually in new york

friend2 GIRL WHAT don't you have work???

friend3 i see that dates with the f1 driver went well

yourusername just posted!

liked by maxverstappen1, bestie1 and 112 others

yourusername from ny to silverstone 📸

view all comments

maxverstappen1 my woman ❤️

bestie1 damn he's fast

bestie1 i'm so JEALOUSSS

friend1 y/n come back the kids miss you

friend2 tell max to buy me a boat

friend3 wait y/n when we told you to leave we were joking

yourusername too late bitches i'm out (i'll come back tomorrow i miss you pookie)

y/nmom Que guapos los dos!! Tu padre y yo nos morimos por conocerlo ❤️❤️ (how pretty both of you!! your father and i can't wait to meet him)

maxverstappen1 @/yourusername how do you say i can't wait to meet them too in spanish yourusername HSHSHAHA 'no puedo esperar a conocerlos también' maxverstappen1 @/ynmom no puedo esperar a conocerlos también! 😊

friend4 girl if i were you i opened my account and start monetizing him just saying

yourusername omg SHUT UP LMAO

☆ request by: anon

idk if it’s me projecting but it’d be cool tk have max’s bestie be a college student who studies classical music ;) and they’re both crushing idk if that’s too vague but it’s the only idea i have 😭

a/n: i didn't do it with classical music bc i don't know anything about it, and i'm more familiar with museums. i hope you enjoyed it aswell, (i know it took too long)

[nvrsaidiwasinurcloset]

okay hi just a warning rq my autocorrect is off bc it autocorrected my friend’s name to fuckin malayalam on accident. i dont like autocorrect.

ANYWAY! ive been listening to my lovely olivia rodrigo lately, specifically her new song obsessed. i wanted to know if you could make a fic with Ethan x fem! reader where readers bitchy friend has this ex (Ethan) and she made him out to be a real dick. like, manipulating and everything.

reader eventually meets him and it turns out that she remembers… a lot about him considering her friend is a constant yapper and cant shut up about him. Ethan actually turns out to be a real cutie patootie and could literally never hurt anyone.

a few days later theyd meet again at some club or party maybe where they end up hitting it off… a little too well.. yeah so she ends up in his bed (smut part, very dom ethan plspls 😛😛). they could be talking about something really random and then reader brings up how her friend basically completely lied about him and said he was a piece of shit when he really wasnt. like a realllll fluffy end before a small cliffhanger thats never gonna get finished where her friend ends up finding out and texting her.

so sorry if thats too long or confusing idk but i actually love your work so much im lowkey your #1 fan. 😍😍😍

HELLO! I switched this up a little, I hope that's okay! 💕

Also, I fucking loved the 'leave it on a cliffhanger part that won't get finished' because WHY IS THAT WHAT I DO lmao

Obsessed - Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader - Part 1

This contains SMUT - Minors DNI

Part 2

Summary: Your friend told you horrible lies about her ex-boyfriend, and once you get to know him, you realize he's not the monster she made him out to be.

Contains: Mentions of a toxic relationship, Dom-ish cocky Ethan, rough-ish sex, oral - f receiving, p in v, fluff (If I missed anything, PLEASE let me know. I'm sleep deprived atm)

A/N: This was the one that pulled me out of my writers block, lmao. It's still not where I want it to be, but I'm TRYING. I'll try to post more this week, but I will be busy so bear with me haha.

You didn’t know Ethan Landry, but you knew you didn’t like him. He used to date one of your friends, and after hearing all the horrible things he’d said and done during their relationship, you thought he was really scummy.

They dated in high school and couldn’t get enough of each other, so they wanted to go to the same college. They broke up right before freshman year started, and after almost a year, she still talked about him every chance she got. She’d tell you how controlling he was. The things he’d call her when he was mad. How he cheated on her. You couldn’t believe that she stayed in the relationship for as long as she did, because she never had anything good to say, except that she loved him.

You’d seen pictures of him, and after walking into one of your classes at the start of the new semester, you saw him in person for the first time. He was so shy as he took his seat in the lecture hall, some of the girls making their little comments about the rumors they’d heard about him. He didn’t seem like the type that would do the things your friend said, but maybe he was just really good at playing innocent. All you knew was that you needed to keep your distance from him.

When you met up with your friend later that day for lunch, you didn’t know if you wanted to bring up Ethan being in the same class as you, but once she brought him up, you decided to tell her.

“Speaking of Ethan…I saw him today,” you said, before taking a bite of your food. Her face dropped as she looked at you.

“Where did you see him?” she questioned. You explained that you saw him in one of your new classes, and she rolled her eyes. “Can you believe he still tries to text me?”

“What I can’t believe is that you haven’t blocked him,” you said, “I know I’d hate to see someone that treated me like shit’s name pop up on my phone.”

She started to giggle as you curiously stared at her. “I have him saved in my phone as ‘Tall loser with a small dick’, so I laugh every time he does text me.”

“That’s not toxic at all,” you said, as you started to think about what she’d said. “Wait, he treated you as bad as he did and has a small dick? What the fuck were you thinking?”

“All he had going for him was that he was cute,” she said, “But seriously, if I were you, I’d stay away from him.”

“Oh, please. Like I’d even want to be near him.”

Your morning wasn’t going as expected. You slept through all of your alarms; you didn’t have time to stop for coffee. You didn’t think your day could get any worse, until you walked into class and noticed the only empty seat available was beside Ethan. You took a deep breath before you walked over and sat down. Once you reached into your backpack, you realized that your laptop wasn’t there. You were in such a hurry when you ran out of your dorm and didn’t even think to grab it.

“Shit,” you whispered, “I’m so stupid.”

“Here,” Ethan said, passing you a notebook and a pen. You curiously looked at him as he offered a weak smile. “I always keep an extra notebook, just in case.”

“Thanks,” you said, a half-smile playing on your lips.

Once class started, you were taking your notes, but you kept glancing over to Ethan. He was so focused on typing that he didn’t notice, but you couldn’t help but wonder if everything your friend told you was true. At that moment, he didn’t seem like a jerk. Then again, he had only spoken a handful of words to you.

Ethan was aware of all the things that were said about him. He hoped that after a few weeks it all would’ve blown over, but once you have an angry ex-girlfriend paint you as some horrible, emotionally abusive asshole, it’s hard to come back from that. He knew that it was best for him to just keep his head down until he was able to transfer to a different school, where no one knew who he was. He was miserable at Blackmore, and he really had no reason to stick around, aside from the few friends he’d made.

After class was over, you tore the pages of notes you’d taken from the notebook to give it back to Ethan.

“Thanks again,” you said, as you handed it back to him.

“You’re welcome,” he said, shoving it back in his backpack. “I thought about just emailing you my notes, but I didn’t know if you’d want that.”

“You’re telling me I didn’t have to spend the last hour trying to write that fast?” you asked, as he flashed you a sweet, genuine smile. “Why wouldn’t someone want that?”

“I don’t know, maybe it’s because most people here hate me,” he said, sliding the straps of his backpack over his shoulders. “You’ve probably heard things about me.”

“Yeah…are they true?” you asked, as he shook his head.

“You’re the first person that’s asked me that. Everyone else just assumes everything is true,” he sighed, “But no, I’m not a bad person.”

You started to feel so guilty. You’d said plenty of bad things about him, but you only heard one side of the story. With your friends’ story changing so many times, getting more dramatic each time she told it, you were starting to realize that it was all bullshit. You still didn’t know exactly what happened, but you were curious to know what the truth was.

“You okay?” Ethan asked, noticing that you were lost in thought as you stood in front of him.

“I’m friends with your ex,” you said, as his smile slowly fell. “What’s the real story?”

He sat back down in his seat as the other students piled out of the room. You sat beside him as you waited for him to speak.

“I really loved her…but she was just so controlling. Then she cheated on me when she went to the beach with her family. I didn’t find out about that until right before we started college,” he said, looking over to you. “She was pissed that I broke up with her, then all these horrible things about me started going around.”

“That’s fucked up,” you said, as he nodded.

“Yeah, she’s still been trying to text me. I finally blocked her a few days ago.”

“Wait, she said you’ve been trying to text her,” you said, his eyes growing wide at your words.

“Her number’s been deleted from my phone for months. I have no interest in talking to her,” he said, “I know this must be weird for you since you are her friend, but I think it’s cool that you wanted to hear me out.”

“Well, I feel like I need to apologize…I’ve said some things about you that weren’t true.”

“She’s a good liar. She has almost the entire school hating me so it doesn’t surprise me that her friend does, too,” he said, as he stood back up.

“I don’t hate you,” you said, smiling at him. “I don’t know if you’d want to, and I know she’d kill me, but if you ever want to hang out sometime, let me know.”

“I’d like that.”

Ethan was kicking himself for not asking you for your number, or shit, even your social media so he could DM you. He thought you were beautiful, but he knew that hoping for a chance with you would be a reach. He really just needed more people in his life that believed him to make the time he still had at the university more enjoyable.

Your friend begged you to come to a random frat party that you didn’t feel like going to in the first place. After your talk with Ethan, you weren’t even sure you wanted to be around her. You still went, and after searching for her for almost an hour, you checked your phone to see a message from her that she wasn’t coming, and that she ran into one of the guys she’d been hooking up with on the way to the party.

“Why the fuck am I even here?” you said to yourself as you locked your phone and slid it into the back pocket of your jeans.

“Hopefully to hang out with me, if your offer’s still good,” you heard from behind you, recognizing Ethan’s voice.

“Hey,” you said as you turned to face him. “I didn’t expect to see the most hated man on campus here.”

“My roommate told me that if I stayed in my dorm tonight, he’d throw my Xbox out the window,” he said, glancing over to the muscular guy that was watching Ethan talk to you.

“Ah, so you were threatened into being social,” you said, as he started to laugh.

“I guess you could say that. Do you want a drink?”

“Sure.”

Ethan wasn’t much of a drinker; you could tell by the sour look on his face every time he took a sip. It gave him a little confidence though, as the two of you talked and got to know each other a little better.

“I don’t think I can drink this anymore,” he said, sitting the cup down on a table. You sat yours down too, and as soon as you did, someone bumped into you, shoving you into Ethan.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” you said, looking up at him. Your chest was pressed closely against his, his hands on your hips from catching you.

“Don’t be sorry,” he said, “You can stay this close to me all night, if you want.”

“Are you always this smooth? Or is it the alcohol?” you questioned as he smirked at you.

“I’m only buzzed,” he said, before he leaned down, placing his lips on yours.

Chad was still watching Ethan from afar, cheering and thrusting his fist in the air once he saw Ethan kiss you. He started to laugh against your lips before he pulled away to stare daggers through his roommate for interrupting the moment.

“I can’t take him anywhere,” Ethan said, as you smiled at him.

“We could go somewhere more private,” you suggested, as he took your hand in his.

“Want to go back to my dorm? He’ll be here for a while so I know we can talk without being interrupted.”

“Sure!”

Once you made it back to Ethan’s dorm, you were starting to think that he really did just want to talk. You enjoyed listening to him, though. He was telling you about all his hobbies and interests, and you were telling him yours. You started to glance around his side of the dorm room, noticing the cliché, dorky things you’d expect to see.

“Nice Star Wars poster, nerd,” you joked, as he smirked at you.

“Oh, I’m a nerd?” he said, as he nudged you back on his bed. He was hovering over you, his mouth inches from yours. The sexual tension got so thick as his eyes looked into yours, his hand rubbing your hip.

“Mhm,” you said, the corner of your bottom lip in between your teeth. “A hot nerd.”

He felt his cheeks start to heat up, and he really didn’t want you to notice, so he leaned down to finally connect his lips to yours. It didn’t take long for the kiss to get more intense, his tongue brushing across your bottom lip. You let him deepen the kiss, his tongue moving with yours as his hands started to roam. You whimpered into the kiss once his hand squeezed your thigh, your hips started to squirm underneath him.

He pulled away but still stayed close so the two of you could catch your breath. You were reading each other’s faces, and it was obvious that you both wanted more.

“How far do you want this to go?” he asked, his breathing still heavy as his eyes looked into yours.

“As far as you want,” you said, your sweet tone making him groan.

“That’s not what I asked you,” he said, as he leaned back down to kiss your neck. His curls were tickling you, but the only reaction you had were the soft moans slipping past your lips from how well his mouth moved. His hips were rutting into yours, showing you how hard he was for you.

“I want you to fuck me,” you said, as he pulled away to look at you.

“You sure?”

“Mhm.”

Ethan was a little, well, very eager. He got you undressed in what felt like seconds, leaving you in just your panties. Once he stripped down to just his boxers, you got a little curious. You glanced down to see his hard cock straining against the fabric, and started to laugh to yourself, your gaze going to the ceiling.

“What’s funny?” he asked, as he hovered back over you to take one of your nipples in his mouth. Your laughing stopped, a gasp slipping out when he started to suck. “I asked you a question,” he teased, before moving to the other side.

“She really does lie about everything,” you said, as his tongue swirled. “She said you had a small dick.”

He started to laugh against you, before he pulled back. “That’s funny, because she couldn’t take it.”

“I can,” you said, his smile turning to a smirk as his hand trailed down your body to rub you over your panties.

“We’ll see about that,” he said, as he moved lower down the bed to position himself between your thighs.

He slid your panties down your legs, before running his fingers over your wet pussy. Your eyes stayed on him, your bottom lip in between your teeth as he teased you. Your anticipation just kept building as he moved down the bed, positioning himself in between your thighs. He leaned in, slipping his tongue inside your entrance.

He was sloppily eating you out, his head moving from side to side. His arms hooked under your thighs to pull you as close to his face as he could as your hands went to his hair.

“So good,” you whimpered, your breathing getting faster as he worked you closer to your orgasm.

He slid his tongue out of you to focus on your clit, quickly replacing it with two of his fingers. Your back was arching off the bed as he moved his arm back and forth, applying as much pressure as he could to that spongy spot inside you as he sucked on your swollen bundle of nerves.

“You’re gonna make me cum,” you babbled, as he started to chuckle with your clit in his mouth.

That was all it took for your legs to start shaking and your grip on his hair getting even tighter. Once your pussy started to clench around him, he slowed his fingers to a slow roll, not wanting to overstimulate you. His tongue gently licked your clit as he worked you through it, your whimpers getting softer as you came down from your high.

“That was the best orgasm I’ve ever had,” you admitted through your shaky breathing. Ethan started to laugh a little as you looked at him, your eyes hazy. “What?”

“Just wait until I’m inside you,” he cockily said, “You still confident that you can handle it?”

“I know I can,” you said, your legs instinctively spreading wide for him as his fingertips ran up your thigh.

“What are you going to do when no one else can make you feel as good as I do?” he questioned, as one of his fingers started to rub circles on your clit.

“I guess I’d have to keep you around then,” you said, as he shook his head.

“You’d only have me until summer starts,” he said, his finger moving faster. “I’m transferring to a different school after this year.”

“No, you’re not..fuck. I’ll convince you to stay,” you said, relaxing into the bed as he teased you.

Ethan pulled his hand away from your pussy before he slid his boxers off. He crawled back on top of you and reached over to his bedside table to grab a condom.

“I might let you convince me,” he said, as he lined up with your entrance. You tensed up a little because you knew how big he was. “Relax, baby.”

You did as he said, taking a deep breath as he inched his way inside of you. You were moaning as he stretched you out, and when you thought he was all the way in, he just kept going.

“Oh fuck,” you whimpered, feeling so full as he finally came to a stop, wanting to give you plenty of time to adjust. “Told you..Fuck, I told you I could take it,” you said, already struggling to speak.

“Don’t get cocky,” he said, your mouth falling open as he started to move. “I’m going to ruin this pussy.”

“Ruin it,” you said, challenging him as your lusty, hooded eyes connected with his.

It took everything in Ethan to not immediately start pounding into you, but he didn’t want to hurt you. He started slow, your eyebrows already furrowing together, low moans slipping past your lips. The head of his cock hit that special spot every single time, but you needed more. He sped up a little as your legs wrapped around him, your hands gripped tightly around his biceps.

“Maybe you can take it,” he said, his breathing getting heavier. “Can I go faster?”

“Yes,” you whimpered, as his hips moved quicker.

Your brain was starting to turn to mush, the babbles slipping past your lips making absolutely no sense. The only thing your mind could process in that moment was how good Ethan was making you feel. He thought you were adorable, already so cock drunk, and he wasn’t even close to being done with you yet. He kept his pace, but occasionally thrust a little harder to see if you could take it, the loud moans slipping past your lips as your nails started to dig into his arms letting him know that you could.

He angled your hips to go even deeper. His pace was a little slow as he made sure you were okay. Your eyes were pleading with him to go faster, because you knew the words weren’t going to come out of your mouth. It was getting so hard for him to hold back, so he finally let go. He started to pound into you so hard that your skin was tingling, all the nerves in your body on edge. Your toes were curling as he slammed into your g-spot, your whimpers turning to cries as you felt your orgasm starting to build. It was hard for you to keep your eyes open, and you were sure Ethan was going to have your nail marks on his arms forever with how hard you were squeezing him.

“Fuck,” was the only word you were able to get out, your legs wrapping tightly around him as your body started to involuntarily jolt. Ethan was sure that everyone in the surrounding dorm rooms knew what was happening, because you were being so loud. He wasn’t letting up though. He loved that he was making you feel that good.

It only took a few more deep thrusts before your entire body started to tremble, loud whines flooding out of your mouth as the wave of euphoria washed over you. He chased his own orgasm as he fucked you through it, your pussy clenching him so tight that he was moaning himself.

“I’m almost there, baby,” he said, a slight rasp in his voice from all the panting he’d been doing.

You went limp, your grip on his arms and your legs around his waist relaxing as his hips started to falter, a loud groan slipping past his lips as he released into the condom.

He took a minute to catch his breath before he slid out of you. His abs were burning and his arms were sore from your nails, but he quickly got up to take the condom off so he could take care of you.

He crawled in the bed next to you as you adjusted to lay your head on his chest, still so fucked out that it was hard to process your thoughts. Ethan just held you close, his hands softly rubbing over your bare back as you relaxed into his touches.

“You’re okay, right?” he asked, after a few minutes of you not saying anything. You lazily nodded as your hand moved to rub across his chest.

You laid there in silence as you started to think about what’d just happened. You knew your friend was going to be pissed if she ever found out, but did that even matter? She made almost the entire university hate Ethan for things he never did, and it made you sad that he felt like he needed to switch to a different school so he wouldn’t have to deal with it anymore.

“So…” you finally said, “How can I convince you to stay?”

He let out a nervous laugh, not knowing the best way to respond. “I can’t take people talking about me the way they do anymore.”

“Even if I convince everyone that it was all lies?” you questioned, your tone playful as you angled your head to look at him. “I think it’d be awful for you to leave because of her. You could miss out on someone that would treat you right.”

“Someone like you?” he questioned as he looked down at you. You nodded, before he leaned down to kiss you. “You’re good at this whole convincing thing.”

“Does that mean you’ll stay?” you asked, smiling as you sat up to look at him.

“Yeah, as long as you don’t break my heart,” he said, wrapping his arms around you to pull you back down to his chest.

“I won’t.”

You stayed in Ethan’s bed for a couple hours, making plans for all the dates he wanted to take you on. It felt like you’d known him for way longer than just a few days, the two of you having an instant connection. You hated to pull away from him, but you knew you needed to get dressed before his roommate got home.

“It’s late, can I walk you back to your dorm?” he asked, as he started to put his clothes back on.

“I can’t believe I thought you were this horrible monster. You’re so sweet,” you said, as he smiled at you. “Yeah, you can walk me home.”

Ethan walked you to the front door of your building, pulling you into a gentle kiss before he pulled away.

“I’ll text you,” he said, as he started to back away.

“Yeah, let me know when you make it back to your dorm, please,” you said, as he nodded.

When you made it upstairs and got settled into your bed, you heard your phone vibrate as it charged on your bedside table. You grabbed it and saw a goodnight message from Ethan, a huge smile on your face as you responded to him. You were so exhausted from the time you’d spend with him, and you soon felt yourself start to doze off. You heard your phone buzz again, your eyes lazily opening to see if it was Ethan. You took a deep breath once you read the message that was sent to you.

‘Why the fuck were you kissing Ethan at that party?’

[runningfrom2am]

i'll tell her you stopped by

happy birthday to one of the most talented, intelligent, hard-working people on this planet <3 kezie it is such a treat to get to be your friend and i’m so so glad we met and im just so lucky you picked me! you’re amazing and i hope you have the best birthday ever bc i know you deserve it :)

so, obviously, this one goes out to @keziahcore / @winterrrnight bc i love you so so much

summary: rafe just wants to hangout while you study- is that really a crime? (aka: three times he tried to sneak in while you were studying, and the one time he succeeded... kind of)

pairing: soft!rafe x fem!reader

wc: 1.5k

tags/warnings: soft!rafe (bc ik how much you're a sucker for it kez ;)), highschool!au, established relationship, not much else? idk one mention of teen pregnancy (it's just mentioned, it doesn't actually happen lol) so stay safe out there y'all

a/n: this is doubling as my day seven for obx week bc it is a 3 times/1 time but i'm posting a lil early bc it's my girls birthday :)

masterlists // nav

requests

join my taglist here

One

The first time Rafe tried to sneak in to see you, you were studying in your room. Headphones in, you were absolutely dead to the world as your boyfriend took the classic approach of throwing small rocks up to your window, the stones dinging off the glass repeatedly with no notice from you. He tries calling, again, but your phone is still on silent. You didn't want any distractions- as much as you would have loved to see him, you were busy.

After about ten minutes Rafe is startled by the back door to your home opening, jumping back from the sudden sound.

"Rafe, you gotta go, buddy. You'll distract her. Head home." Your dad says, gesturing to the side of the house for him to go around.

"Yes sir. I, uh, I'll go." Rafe nods at him, giving him a quick salute before quickly heading for the gate.

Your dad sighs with a fond smile on his face, shaking his head as he closes the door again and locking it behind himself.

Two

The second time, a few days later, Rafe was coming to your house with a better plan. Making noise wasn't an option, so he had to be extra careful as he scaled the siding of the back porch, trying to get up onto the roof to reach your window. You shared fond memories of climbing out when he was over, when you weren't busy with exams, sitting on the shingles and looking up at the stars and out at the vast and infinite ocean. However, Rafe had never tried to reach your window from below before.

He made it up, just barely after almost falling no less than three times. He brushed off his knees and stood up, creeping past your parent's window towards yours. He can see you now, your room dimly lit with the flashes from Gilmore Girls playing on your TV and a candle flickering next to your bed as you sit there reading. He smiles to himself, almost there when he hears a window sliding open behind him. "Rafe, honey, is that you? It's late." Your mom whispers and he silently curses himself, quickly turning back to face her as she leans over the window's ledge.

"Hi Mrs. Y/L/N. How are you?" He asks, awkwardly glancing over his shoulder towards your window again.

"I'm well, Dear, but it's too late for you to stop by. Y/N has a test early in the morning, and she needs to focus right now." She smiles sympathetically at him. "I'm sorry."

"No, no, of course. I'll go home." Rafe nods, giving her a quick wave and watching his step as he heads back to the pillar he climbed up from.

"Hey, no, don't climb down that way. You'll fall and break your neck, come in and use the door." Your mom chuckles, stepping back so he can fit inside the window of her room.

"Oh, uh, yeah. Thank you." He says, looking toward the light seeping through your window one more time before climbing in to follow your mom down to the front door.

"I'll tell her you stopped by in the morning." Your mom nods at him, gently closing the door behind him as he says a quick thank you.

Three

Maybe Rafe had been overcomplicating his break-in attempts. He realized as he drove home that night that night was that the one thing he hadn't tried, was using the door. Well, the back door. Which is why he was determined this time for his plan to work. Especially since your parents wouldn't be home. Although, they had told you not to have anyone over.

You had told him earlier in the day that you would be busy that night, and he knew that just meant you had homework. No harm in him joining you, he swore to himself that he would just be silent company, he was more than happy to watch Gilmore Girls again while you went over readings and notes from earlier in the week.

At this point, he knows where to step on your back deck in order to not make a sound. Or, that's what he thought. The light is on in the kitchen, and it's about eleven o'clock- no one should be up except for you anyway. With the first step he took onto the deck, the board creaked and his eyes flew up to the kitchen window to double confirm to himself there was no one there, but he was unlucky today. He makes solid eye contact with your big sister, now standing in the kitchen with a mug in her hand. Your parents must have asked her to stay with you while they were away- despite you being far too old for a babysitter.

There's a solid three seconds of eye contact before Rafe or your sister make a move, but it happens all at once when she breaks his gaze to look at the door, seeing it was unlocked. She looks back at him, and in a split second Rafe is bolting for the door as your sister drops her mug in the sink and sprints for the door, reaching it and turning the lock right as Rafe grabs the handle.

Through the glass she laughs quietly at him, shrugging and mouthing 'too slow' to your boyfriend on the other side of the window.

"Come on, this isn't funny." Rafe groans, pulling at the handle hopelessly.

"I can't let you in. I promised my parents, sorry." She shakes her head with a slight laugh.

"Please? I promise I won't distract her. I won't tell them. Come on." He begs, voice muffled by the pane of glass between them.

She shakes her head again. "Nope, she's not getting pregnant under my supervision. Not happening. Go home, she'll see you tomorrow."

"Ugh, fine. You're no fun, I get it." Rafe raises his hands defensively, stepping back from the door.

"Boohoo, Rafe. Go throw yourself a pity party at Tannyhill." Your sister mocks him, rolling her eyes with a smile and closing the curtain over the door as he sulks away back through the yard.

One

Rafe was so caught up in the idea of a romantic surprise to visit you late at night, throwing pebbles at your window or climbing up to it and letting himself in, even overlooking the idea that hearing someone walk in the back door when you're meant to be home alone may scare the life out of you. Another thing he hadn't tried was just asking you.

"Hey, can I come over later?" He asks you, walking you from his car up to the school.

You look up at him, about to nod before you think about it. "Well, I'd like to hang out but I think I should get ahead on my chem homework." You resign to answering, not pleased with it either.

"We can study together, like a date. Come on, it'll be fun." Rafe insists, slotting his hand into your free one.

"That's what I'm afraid of." You giggle, squeezing his hand gently and swinging them between you. "Studying isn't supposed to be fun, it's supposed to be productive."

"I can be productive." Rafe nods, smiling at you smugly.

You squint at him, unsure of how true that is. You give in anyway. "Okay, fine. I'll unlock the door for you."

"Yes! Thank you, it'll be good. I promise you won't regret it." Rafe smiles, leaning down to press a kiss to your cheek before dropping your hand to open the front doors of the school for you.

"I better not." You laugh, shaking your head at him as you pass him in the doorway.

That night, you crept downstairs after your parents had gone to sleep, and as promised, unlocked the front door. Nonchalantly, you walk into the kitchen to make a cup of tea while you wait for Rafe to arrive.

Rafe was already outside, having parked down the block and watching from behind the neighbour's fence to see when your silhouette would come down the stairs and up to the door, remaining only for a few moments before turning and walking towards the kitchen. He gives you a moment before throwing his backpack over his shoulders, and standing up straight ready to head up to the door.

You're just pouring your tea when you hear the front door crack open, quickly turning to go meet Rafe at the door so you can head straight upstairs- curbing the risk of your parents seeing him.

Rafe slowly, delicately closes the door behind him as you walk up, eyes drawn to the small handful of flowers he holds- freshly picked from the neighbour's garden. Your cheeks burn as he holds them out to you, smiling as you take them silently before gesturing for him to follow you upstairs.

Your mother let her book fall into her lap as she listened to hushed giggles and whispers coming down the hall, quieting as they faded away towards your room. She smiled to herself and shook her head, lifting the paper back up once more to continue from right where she left off.

taglist: @bookishbabyyy, @madelynie, @whore-4-drewstarkey, @slut4drudy, @winterrrnight, @totalswag, @sadfury, @fullfledgedemo @rafemotherfuckingcameron, @urfaveluvr, @chenslucy, @hxnnah-397, @s-we-e-t-t-ea, @tahliac11, @saccharinesammie, @ietss, @maybankslover,  @redhead1180, @suzyheartsrafe, @wpdailyminimeta, @aegons-bitch, @rafegirly, @lovelyxtommy, @thelomlisrafecameron, @thatsthewaythechrissycrumbles, @flonkertn, 

[girl-dot-tzt]

Alright results are in, I'm not allowed to finish for 36 days 🙃

Im going to update this as a lil diary to keep me honest💃

Day 1: I'm feeling pretty good, I notice I get really horny when I take my prog the ✨️fun way✨️ so I'm going to use that method to increase the challenge this month. I'm thinking of meeting a friend tomorrow so I'm excited!

Day 2: more of the same, pretty standard, had a great time with said friend. Getting a teeny but pent up but nothing crazy yet.

Day 3: getting more pent up but it's still manageable, made the mistake of reading a ton of horny posts and getting myself really horny. Thankfully I calmed down and now I'm good to go

Day 4: went to work, did some bike wrenching, now im boutta sleep. pretty uneventful but I'm meeting a good friend of mine tomorrow so I plan on making up for the lack of horny twofold. I need to get some Oregonian mutuals bc I'd like to bite someone :3

Day 5: got my tits fondled for like 3 hours while I watched anime and got insanely high, I need like 4 people to hold me down and grope/tease/fuck me... preferably all at once. I've got 31 more daysssssss, does it count if it's hands free? 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️

Day 6: got no sleep, very horny, idk what direction Is up, and I need an answer to the question from yesterday 😫

Day 7: got sleep but not railed because if I get railed too well I'll could possibly finish and idk if that's OK yet :3. I'm going to mountain bike today! I'm super excited bc I need something to take the edge off, if I'm really unlucky I'll get too horny from the idea of getting fucked in the woods and make an update here.

Day 8: we're evening out a little, this may not be impossible, tbf I haven't had time to do much lately so when I finally get the time to ride my toys that might change. I'm planning on doing that tomorrow :3

Day 8 update: I accidentally took two progesterone pills because I boof mine, but I accidentally muscle memory-ed taking my prog orally. Got so horny during work that I nearly cried.

Day 9: I broke some spokes while mountain biking and now I'm sad, but horny and frustrated too. I can only think about being bred, but also being sad that my bike broke, damn fucking stupid sticks getting inbetween my fucking spokes. I need railed bad, etcetera etcetera

Day 10:

Girl abs, that is all

Day 11: I'm going to fuck myself on the biggest toy I own until I'm crying or edging with my Pspot🧍‍♀️ I will return

Day 12: I'm pretty sure I ended up getting edged. Pretty sure because I've never actually finished hands free before and my vibrator died right before I was about to finish. One of you witchy mother fuckers knew I was about to cheat or something, no other explanations, couldn't possibly be that I forgot to charge toys like a dumbass. Laugh it up, I got edged hard by my ADHD.

Days 13: I had a threesome and it was awesome! I explained my agreement to them and got teased a bunch as me and my friend dommed the fuck out of a gorgeous girl. We groped and kissed and sucked all over her body as she got more and more worked up, until eventually I was fucking her with my big purple vibrator and she came hands free for the first time! We made sure to shower her with all kinds of praise and congratulations 💃💃

Days 14-16: started a new job, I'm getting so horny these days that rather than feeling butterflies it's like an almost painful NEED. Like I just desperately need to get tied up and ground into dust, getting edged with my vibrator did a number on me because I'm a mess rn😆

Days 17-20: if I may be honest i embarked on this endeavor to try to finish hands free, I've never done it before but I desperately want to. I think I'll be able to do it by the end of these 36 days or sooner. Idk it's just a hunch🧍‍♀️

Day 21-29: 10 hr shifts in a lab will drive you nuts when there's nothing to think about but getting railed and ice cream percentages. On the plus side I am not only paid but required to eat ice cream every hour at my job. On the downside, I got so horny I cried last night🧍‍♀️😵‍💫😵‍💫

[reikunrei]

feeling incredibly averse to posting this but i'm just gonna drop my kofi link here in case anyone wants to help me get out of my increasingly shitty situation living with my parents

more info below ig

after having given my parents nearly $100k over the last four years, i'd love to be able to actually leave. my future job situation is still up in the air (i've submitted for about a dozen positions and the only one i've heard back from and interviewed for hasn't gotten back to me yet), and i haven't been able to build up any savings because, again, i was (and still am) helping my family afford rent and bills, and probably the taxes my parents are behind on, but if i think about that, i'll get too angry. no joke, i've given my family, at the bare minimum, 85% of my income over the last 4 years. the rest of it has gone toward medical stuff and, now, my car

at this point, with the combo of my mom refusing to lower her standards and my dad's seeming refusal to hunt for a new full time job, i don't see how they won't continue to bleed me dry. my dad even has a bad habit of taking money out of my old savings account that he's a joint owner on or whatever from when i got it set up when i was 16, even when i stopped actively putting money in it, so now any time it gets its automated $1 transfer from my checking account, he'll just take that $1 without consulting me. i'm not exaggerating, even if it has $1-2 in it, it'll be gone within a week

i've even put off starting on testosterone because of this. i wanted to start it like 3 years ago, but kept putting it off because of money issues and wanting to save as much as possible. i got really close to actually starting it this year, but because of how messy everything is, i put it off again bc having one more thing on my plate, especially when my parents are already weird about me being trans, was not something i wanted to deal with

not to mention, we're still currently not living under a lease in our house that we're, as far as i'm aware, still tens of thousands of dollars behind in rent on (again, my dad refuses to disclose our financial position honestly with any of us) and it's developed many, many issues bc the landlord, even before we were behind on rent, is shit and refuses to actually fix anything. and my dad loves to just ignore things unless we beg him to do something

i'd love to be on my own (in the, much more affordable, midwest) by the end of summer. i by no means want to rely on donations and i have other avenues i'm working with to make money (i still have my current full time job, but i'm going through my old belongings and selling a lot online), but i'll take any help i can get atp because i'm truly at my wits end. i'd start doing art commissions again if i could, but doing that from 2020-2022, partially on top of my full time job, absolutely wrecked my right hand and i'm still in enough pain that i can't make it a regular activity

idk how much else there is to say. there's more i could say but... i don't really wanna air all my dirty laundry here. i'm miserable in so many ways and it's just become increasingly clear that my dad expects me to constantly cover his ass. my younger brother gives money too, but he manages to go on big cross-country and overseas trips with friends, so i think i've been stuck with the burden of giving the most money. there's so many more things going on in the world rn and everyone is stretched thin so i don't expect much, or anything, but. idk. might as well throw it out there, right?

i’ve also since taken down the gfm i set up last year when we got our first eviction notice bc, while we still need the money, i don’t feel right keeping it up for multiple reasons, including “i don’t want to give any of that money to my family” and it feels too… serious to keep it up when i could just throw out my kofi instead

i just want to make sure i have some sort of safety net to catch me if i move before anything job-wise is finalized. i need to be able to afford a place to live for at least a month so i can job-search while physically being in the area i wanna move to, which would ultimately make it easier for me to find a job at all. i'm working on being more firm with giving less money so i can actually have the means to move and be safe and comfortable, but... that never lasts long in this house

anyway. that's it, i guess. thanks for reading

[tinystepsforward]

i've still been keeping tabs on what's happening at automattic. a couple of things i've observed:

toni schneider (who is a man btw), the interim ceo, has been quite open with staff in ways that mean they generally seem relieved to have him leading the company for now. i've heard people speak optimistically about him from all parts of the spectrum (by which i mean: staff who are trans tumblr users right through to staff who are "anti-woke" or whatever and were absolutely intolerable to work with as a trans person), which seems like... a good sign? maybe.

this relative transparency includes things like weekly updates from an executive level, as well as openly saying that he did have to directly speak to matt and encourage him to, you know, stop posting.

matt is back to his usual milquetoast blogging, and replied to someone on mastodon about the AI issue saying he'd comment on it when he's back in may, so whatever toni said to him seems to have worked for him keeping out of it for now.

people have no idea what it's gonna look like when matt's back.

the best case scenario is that schneider manages to create a significant enough boost in morale and productivity that "it'd be nice if we just kept him" becomes a sentiment that isn't held just by the rank and file. i don't know how likely that is, but there's a sense of cautious hope and of making the most of this reprieve from matt's increasingly erratic decisions no matter what.

the tumblr staff statement was approved by schneider and hr, so i am also hopeful they won't face repercussions. what they said might seem pretty mild from the outside, or carefully worded, but it's pretty clear to me and to most people who've worked at companies like this that it's a pretty bold one.

i'll quote a friend:

keep reminding the more histrionic elements out there that: 1. there really are trans people, INCLUDING TRANS WOMEN, in the fight here. 2. we don't have nearly the power they seem to think we do. 3. we're fighting anyway. was the statement we wrote enough? fuck no. does it fix everything? fuck no. but we literally called out the CEO, and got the greenlight for it from the interim CEO. i don't know where this will end, but that's not nothing.

i'm not sure automattic deserves the immense honor of having this many of its brave, dedicated trans staff put effort into trying to make it better. but it has them, and it would be wise to do its best to keep them. so many of us — even me, even now — believe in the ideals that drew us to the work automattic does, and hope that it can return to them. we will see!

other things i want to say:

the wellbeing of my friends on staff is my priority. i am interested primarily in their safety, and won't pressure them to give me goss. the ways i've spoken publicly are already pretty scary to people who might worry about retaliation against them just for being known to be my friend.

this is a regular personal blog. i'll keep updating if there's shit to update about, but i also don't work at automattic any more (thank fuck, again), have a life, and am not interested in declaring matt my specific nemesis or otherwise acting purely out of spite.

some of youse really deeply do not understand companies, the internet, generative ai, or pretty much anything else i've said. that's okay — big tech in particular is fucked up on purpose bc it benefits those in power to have it be incomprehensible! but maybe it's not a great position from which to get mad at me specifically or at staff for idk not personally assassinating matt.

got tired of blocking transphobes so i've turned anons off. i'll probably flick them back on eventually.

[real-fire-emblem-takes]

still on your Birds of Prey thing i have two(ish) things this time around, though feel free to ramble on other details too even if it wasn't specifically asked or mentioned first off, full permission to do an entire infodump on the ocs you have for this so far, i am very curious about all the details you got collected be it details you've mentioned before, changed, or new ones in general, again full permission for you to go nuts secondly, maybe it could be where only certain weapons allow the potential for breaking when used at advantage in the weapon triangle? like you'd have to buy a more expensive and more bulky weapon that has the benefit of being able to break weapons but again is more expensive and probably harder to wield(either just high in weapon rank or just like absurdly heavy to make it hard for the user to double) idk how well it would work, i'm not exactly known for my "making good Fire Emblem gameplay" expertise so take it with a grain of salt (if i ever dabble in fangames maybe i'll get some experience but today is not that day) (also yeah it be me again, i am also realizing i might have a double standard of wanting to hear about people's ocs in this fandom but then worrying that nobody wants to hear about my own, so i might blab on the ocs i have thus far for my au i'm working on sometime (hopefully) soon, heck i could even include some of the unnamed ones since you've even mentioned some unnamed ones yourself and i still think its cool to hear about!)

BIRDS OF PREY CHARACTER STUFF (not updating this post anymore, if you wanna know more then ask about a specific character or wait for the demo)

Read as much or as little as you'd like! There is a LOT so dont feel like you need to read all of it

Gameplay Character

Aelix

The Main Character of the game. Only has Swords at first but also gains access to staves alongside either light or anima when promoting. Her bases are similar to that of a myrmidon but growths are very balanced. Idk abt the personal skill.

At the start of the game shes pretty normal and well adjusted. A little spoiled and naive but thats how most princesses are in media. Anyway, after her dad and brother die in front of her she starts having a bad time and swears revenge on their assassins, The Flock - a group that claims to be bringing power to the people by enacting a revolution against the Hendeyrn Nobility.

After a while, Aelix's need for revenge dwindles and she begins to notice that the commoners are kinda struggling in Hendeyrn, and in a few other supports, learns that Royumec Commoners are also struggling. Also, The Flock is soon revealed to be a ploy for the Royumec Military to invade Hendeyrn to gain more land and resources without suffering proper retaliation.

Route split occurs and Aelix can choose to 1) defend Hendeyrn and carry on her fathers legacy, 2) Switch over to Royumec out of either naivety or apathy, or 3) Go against both kingdoms and create a people focused movement to improve both kingdoms. 3 leads to the most playable characters leaving/being unrecruited and having to be killed in combat while also having the most maps and being noticably harder.

She should be at the club but now shes gotta avenge her father's death an navigate a whole ass war. RIP girl. Also Very Bi with Mary.

Reinhold ???

Your typical Early Game Crutch. A great knight with high HP and Skill, B in Axes and everything else is bad. Hes only good bc he joins in the prologue. Probably benched by chapter 12. Idk about personal skill. Stays on only Defend route. You fight and kill him on the other 2.

Extremely serious and very intent on preserving the King's Legacy, rather than improving the kingdom or supporting Aelix and Lucille through what is quite literally the worst time of their life. Like yeah hes also not coping well but omg hes actively making it worse for the girls. His perception of the King is also so very incomplete as seen in a certain lategame Rev map. Also directly states in several supports that every knight is conditioned to be a disposable tool for the royal family to use :(

Lenore D'Swigen

Early game flier. Highest res in the game, good speed and decent enough magic to use a levin sword later. Low skill but thats partially offset by the accuracy of swords. Kinda low strength tho. Physical bulk is low enough to take large amounts of damage from archers. Safe from shining bows tho. Can also reclass into anima mage and isnt terrible there. No clue about personal skill. Stays on Defend Route, leaves but comes back on Revolution Route, and becomes an Optional Miniboss on Reinhold's Chapter in Betray Route (You only get a Levin Sword for killing your best friend btw)

Childhood friend of Aelix and heiress to a prominent house of Hendeyrn. Energetic but really clumsy. Also is very intelligent. Plays cards with mary in their support while they gossip.

Kester ???

Really solid Lance fighter. High strength, Def, Skl and Hp. Everything else is low. Can promote into spellspear but only has a 5% Magic growth. Go Halberdier instead. Can also reclass into cav. No clue about personal skill. Stays on all 3 routes. Yay!

Extremely formal at all times, only loosens up with Gareth (Drunk), Kaen (Gets bullied by a teenage girl lmao), Henryk (3h style support chain where they state their issues in case you can't figure out the very obvious subtext) and the Revolution Route A support with Aelix (You're fired btw. wanna be friends now?)

Hal ???

Axe Fighter from Chapter 1. Highest Hp in the game, good Strength, Decent Defence and Luck, Okay Spd and Res, Bad Skl and only 5% Magic. No clue about personal Skill or Reclass options. Stays on All 3 routes! :D

Himbo Malewife who's straight up not having a good time knowing he has killed people. Loves cooking and cleaning and all that.

Niall ???

Most Thief Thief to ever Thief. Highest speed in the game, and also good skill. Okay Luck and Res and everything else sucks. Will chip enemies, steal items and be very evasive late game. Stays on Defend and Revolution Routes. Dissappears entirely on Betray Route.

Very Mischievous and loves pranks. Not much to say tbh. Also has a kill quote where he says hes gonna rob the enemy's corpse ig.

Mary Malheur

The early game healer. Joins Chapter 1 and is always available. C Staves and D Brawling. Has very solid mixed bulk that will only continue to get better, Good Strength and decent Luck. Middling Speed and Skill don't really matter when using an accurate and brave weapon type. Her base magic is enough for early game and you won't start feeling her low growth until midgame.

On top of all that, because she is technically a brawler, meaning she has access to Combat Arts. At Lvl10 unpromoted, she gains access to Defiant Dragon Art, which boosts her Def/Res/Luck by a decent amount until the beginning of next turn (and has a cool interaction with one of her promoted abilities). Upon promotion to War Monk, she gains the Solar Strike art, which restores health. At Max Level, she gains Phoenix Flight art. This is unlimited galeforce for just 12 hp. Like yeah she only gets 1 punch in and will probably be taking additional damage from counterattacks, but even then this is really amazing bc she can use her full 6 movement multiple times a turn.

But if you don't care about all that you can just reclass to wyvern instead.

Indecisive. Sleepy. Likes games. Has several supports that explore the pressure of the expectations placed on her because of her intelligence and potential. Also mentions that healing staves will just prolong and make the death much more excruciating when used on a nearly dead person without explaining where she got that knowledge from in her support with Harsent.

Thank you Mary for keeping the army together throughout the early game Aelix couldn't have done it without u. the midgame probably also. I wish you 2 the best on your wedding <33333333333333

Jaspar ???

The most armoured armour to ever armour. Highest Def in the game, high HP and Strength, Solid Skill and Luck, Terrible Speed and Res. Can also reclass into Archer for some reason. Recruited Chapter 2, Stays on Defend Route, but is an optional miniboss on both Revolution and Betray route. Technically can be rerecruited on rev route but its really hard.

Training obsessed bisexual weirdo(affectionate). Wants to be a really good Knight and be as helpful as possible. Really bad at dealing with the fact that everything will change and nothing is permanent.

Harsent ???

Cavalier. Very balanced stats. So balanced that her growths are somehow within 5% of the average for everything except magic. I didn't even plan this im just as surprised as you are lmao. Can also reclass into Sword Fighter. Stays on Defend Route, can be easily rerecruited on Rev and is an optional miniboss on Betray Route.

Very dedicated to being a knight. Several of her voice lines would imply that she would simply sacrifice herself if Aelix asked. which is. concerning.... Like 70% of the cast needs therapy tbh :(

Ricon ???

Early Mage. Amazing Magic and Res, Good skill, Decent Hp and speed, high base strength but hes a mage and has a low strength growth, also terrible defence and luck. Can reclass into archer (Shining Bow Niche 👀👀👀). Available throughout all 3 routes.

Loves Researching magic and teaching stuff to others. Very intelligent. Overuses magic for mundane things. Sir, a wind spell is gonna blow the clothes away before they dry. Likes sweets and is just a lovable dork who happens to look really intimidating.

Fletcher Holz

Early archer. High strength, speed and skill, low res and everything else is mid. Can reclass into Axe Fighter. Available throughout all 3 routes.

Just some guy tbh. Likes meat. Decent Chef. also hes transmasc.

Gareth ???

Brawler. High health, Decent Defence and everything else is mid. Combat arts include Beastslaying Art (effective against monsters) and Full Force Art (Extremely high might). Also gains Five Star Strike (Astra for 12 HP) at max level. Can reclass into Cavalier. Available for all 3 routes.

Massive Flirt. Takes very little seriously. Accidentally ends up acting like a father to Kaen and Niall.

Alastor von Belleau

This bitch. This asshole. Joins in chapter 4 as a Lvl 5 Troubadour. C Staves and E Rank Anima. Much faster than Ricon but also has lower magic and Anima rank so typically you'll only be seeing 5×2 in combat forecast and cant use any funky spells for a while. Substantially squisher than Mary but has a horse. Personal skill gives 20% extra exp gain to adjacent allies. Suspiciously dissappears a few chapters before route split.

This Royumec Noble enjoys baking and having tea and reading and going on walks and taking care of his horse and is great at taking care of others.

"Oh he sounds nice and helpful" Oh you fool. Thats what he wants you to think. The Royumec Nobility has created The Flock and assassinated Thades and The King. And this bitch is one of them. On the route split, it is straight up revealed that he was a part of the plan and acted as a spy. This asshole then tries to manipulate Aelix into betraying her kingdom.

"We were trying to improve the live of your citizens" (Lie, you were fighting for land and resources), "We actively chose to spare you"(Lie, why were your soldiers attacking Aelix and Co during Chapters 2, 3 and 4), "and your sister" (Ommission of information, you thought that the 16 year old would be easy to manipulate or intimidate into doing what you want), "You trust me, right? We're friends" (Half Lie, Aelix may have seen you as a friend but you certainly didn't see her as one), etc.

Obviously, on Betray Route, he is with you for the rest of the game; However, he actually joins you later on in the other 2 routes because he doesn't want to die (okay thats fair). Joins as a Strategist and can reclass into Trickster or Assassin. Has Great Magic, Res and Speed alongside decent Skill and Luck but terrible HP and Def. 7 personal strength is less terrible than you'd expect but you'll still usually see single digit damage when reclassing him to Assassin or Trickster.

Kaen Karamela

Your second axe fighter. Joins in chapter 5 and is available in all 3 routes. Highest Strength in the game, Good HP, Spd, Skill and Luck, Low Def and Res. Personal skill grants +1 Crit per HP below max. Can also reclass into Lance fighter to grab Vantage.

Kaen is the obligatory minor who really should not be fighting. Girl loves partying and also bullying grown ass men. Her 18th birthday will be a few days after one of the final chapters to specifically have her joke that she has fought in and ended a war before being able to drink alcohol. Canonically Lesbian.

Sarre ???

Early Sword Fighter. Joins Chapter 6 and stays on all 3 routes. Amazing Speed and Great Skill but Underwhelming strength and terrible luck. Can reclass into Axe Fighter.

Not having a great time after her husband left her. Is now in debt bc of his gambling and is trying to pay it off with mercenary work. Left her son at his grandparents so they can raise him while she works. has an arc that changes her for the better. idk how to explain it tho.

Isake ???

Early Light mage. Joins chapter 6 and stays on all routes. Great Defence and magic, Good Hp, Res and Luck, but low speed. Being a Light Mage, Isake gains access to various defensive spells such as Def/Res improving spells, Critical prevention, Draining magic and follow-up prevention. Can reclass into Anima Mage.

Very wise, Kind to all, Patient, Loves giving gifts, very perceptive, etc. Enjoys reading and bird watching.

Klara Varela

A midgame Dark Knight. Only available on Rev route. Only 5% strength and Magic growths but has great bases in those. Best Skl in the game, High speed, everything else is decent. Personal skill grants 1 stack of advantage to Klara if enemy can't counter. This also applies to Dark Magic summons and synergises well with seige tomes. Can reclass into Sorcerer, Halberdier and Spellspear.

Probably has the stongest endgame build (Chaos Style+Vantage+Luna+Ignis+Quixotic as a Spellspear) Ignis and Luna can activate on the same atk btw. High Skill + Personal + Chaos Style + Quixotic leads to her having activation rates in the 70-90% range. Vantage singlehandedly enables this build to work on enemy phase too. Enjoy seeing 50s most hits :). I think plus sized women should be allowed to be op.

(Community mage almost has this build but cant pull it off very well bc no Vantage, lower skill, probably no helpful personal skill for this build, much lower strength and Bulk too low to reliably take multiple hits in case of failure. Sorry!)

Everyone else is in a generally serious war game with political intrigue. Klara is in a comedy. She is a trickster who is constantly playing pranks on people and annoying most by being so deeply unserious. Extremely confident and knows her worth. Has exactly one serious conversation.

Runs the secret shop in all 3 routes but it doesn't have energy drops or spirit dusts because she eated them all. Also straight up drags a guy from the enemy army to fight for you against his will and treats him like her new bestie and drags him everywhere. He hates it. Queen. Love her. Hope she never stops. Tranfem, Aro and Ace.

Adam

Mid game Def and Rev route Wyvern Lord. High Strength, Hp and Def, Decent Skl, Low Res and Luck. Personal skill is a 20% heal after defeating an enemy.

A mercenary hired by Rosahel to help in the war effort. Loves murder a not normal amount. Also the guy that Klara forces into joining your side. That's about it.

Anna von Ernest

Only available in Betray Route. Still has Make a Killing. idk anything else.

You know her.

Henryk ???

This guy is so crazy. Joins in a late paralogue as a Trickster. Extremely Underwhelming stats for a late game unit: Lower strength and magic compared to other units, Middling mixed bulk, Skill and Luck. Only has good speed and Great weapon ranks (A staves, A Daggers). Like a thief but less extreme. Can also reclass into Assassin, Sorcerer and Dark Knight

"So the crazy thing about him is that hes a bad endgame unit who has warp and rescue access" Wrong! His personal skill, Unmask, is the crazy thing about him. He gains 2 stacks of advantage (+15 hit, 10% skill activation, 5 crit and 2 damage dealt per stack) while inflicting enemies with 2 stacks of disadvantage (advantage but reversed) if there are no b support or below allies within 3 spaces. King hides 4 Str/Mag/Def/Res and 10 Spd/Skl/Luck from everyone lmao. Already has an a rank with Thades :)

As i said in the last long FE:BoP post, Henryk managed to raise Thades from the dead somehow. The process was expensive and time intensive as it used dark magic, healing staves, advanced Royumec technology and surgical precision. At first, the dark magic was thought to have taken away some of Thades' agency and given Henryk a substantial amount of control over him and altered his memories, but that was soon discovered to be false.

Henryk likes to appear as unhelpful and incapable as possible to get out of doing work, but is completely fine with putting in effort for those close to him. He enjoys architecture and gardening and in all of his endings, he ends up being a famous architect.

Thades

Joins in a late game Rev route paralogue alongside Henryk. Same Class as Aelix and Lucille. Compared to Aelix, he has much higher Def and Skl and slightly more strength at the cost of much lower Res and Luck and Slightly less speed. Similar Magic and HP. No clue about personal skill. Can reclass into Falcon Knight.

So Unbelievably gay with Henryk. Very emotionally closed off. Hilarious how technically having their father die made him and Aelix get their partners. Anyway, his support with Aelix reveals that they never felt that close to each other bc he was always busy learning how to run things as crown prince while Aelix and Lucille were doted upon and constantly praised by their father.

In the final(?) Rev Route map, Thades has boss dialogue with The King (he came back) where he asks The King if he remembers a simple memory from when Thades was a child. The King says yes, but Thades reveals that the event went completely differently and figures out that The King hasn't been revived like him but instead is The S Rank Dark Magic being used to create a copy of one of noble's perception of him.

In both his Endings, he helps out with managing the restructured nations.

Ill talk about everyone else in later i had to rush this out for today lmao

also feel free to ask more questions, tell me your overall thoughts or even talk about your headcanons for the characters or how you imagine they look

Anyway time for question 2's answer: I figured that break maybe should only be for units with breaker skills (Halberdiers w/ Swordbreaker, Lightbearers w/ Shadowbreaker, etc)

To Do: Summer, Silvester, Yvette, Manon, Jed, Lex, Rosahel, Valstyr, Lucille, The King, Nikita, Siobhan, more characters when i think of them

[lycangrope]

wait omg can u tell me more about how the fuckable plushie and where you bought it please please please

of course! under the cut I'll include photos and explain some things about it I like about it + where to get it :) I have so many thoughts! this will be a very long post!

link (whenever I bought it the listing was ~$330, but unfortunately the price has gone up since then...although, because it's aliexpress, this product can likely be found elsewhere with the information provided in the listing.)

because I'm from the US and the toy is from overseas, it took about a month to get here if my memory is serving me correctly.

there are three appearance options on the site, a polar bear, a red panda, and the puppy in the picture here. as I can tell, there are no internal differences. the puppy's body is notably a little bit longer and is said to be heavier than the other two on the site.

the texture of the plush is fairly similar to a squishmallow (free 🇵🇸 btw), but due to the machinery inside it's EXTREMELY heavy. i have to use both hands to carry it around or move it. it's kind of an awkward shape to cuddle with in a nonsexual way, but it can be done.

the dots on the pink panel are the spots for the magnetic charger (make sure not to get that part too wet bc it will rust and not work. the "toy" part of it is much lower though, so no worries). it comes with a small remote I can't read bc it's in chinese but it's easy to figure out.

obviously there's the pause and power buttons, but the ring is where you get thrusting and vibration. top/bottom increase and decrease thrusting, and right/left control vibration. you cannot turn on vibration without turning on thrusting. no idea what the middle button is meant to do. my package included condoms you can use on it, but I prefer to just clean the toy after use.

the toy only pops out when it has battery life. when it's turned off, it retracts. it comes with a cap you can screw on when it goes down, but I found that it wouldn't fit back on so I just clean it a lot. something that confused me at first is realizing that the dick is oriented upside down? but it doesn't really matter. it's about five and a half inches long with an average circumference.

it has a few hours of continuous battery life and has given me many internal orgasms (without clitoral stimulus) when that wasn't something I was able to achieve before this toy.

I've tried a few different potions and this is how I rate them:

1) doggystyle/from the back: 5/10. i have to do an odd posture to make it go inside, but I can't cum from this because the position is so awkward. it can't go as deep as I'd like it to because my ass is too big. it works if I'm desperate for back shots, I guess

2) spooning or from the side: 6/10, similar complaints as the last, but it works slightly better. face to face from the side is a little easier because my butt isn't in the way, but it's a slightly awkward position.

3) riding: 4/10. the plush doesn't lay flat enough for it not to be awkward. it's too firm and round to lay on its back with a humans body weight on top and be comfortable.

4) missionary: 11/10. this is literally the only way you can use this thing without constantly having to adjust. It lays on your stomach and is soft and warm. it makes me cum a lot. it's attractive to look down and see it thrusting in and out of you. sometimes i'll get high and prop my phone against its nose and watch porn while it fucks me, which is absolute sensory heaven. it's so good that I don't even care that other positions don't really work for me.

i should say that im 5'6" and since this toy is likely chinese i feel like it was designed for people a little bit shorter than me because idk what to do with my legs sometimes while using it haha

my fluids don't really end up getting on the fur or anything, but to clean up the toy part I usually just take a damp paper towel and wipe it down before spraying some toy cleaner on it, letting that dry, then wiping it down again.

if you have more questions, let me know!

[winryrockbellwannabe]

✨Get Ready with me...✨

for the second semester of my 3rd year of college

(all pics from Pinterest, btw)

Part 1: Academic life and free time

📚 My Classes: ☕

- Introduction to Biomaterials (IB) - Biomechanics - Informatic Systems (SI) - Electronics - retaking this class since i failed it last year I also have the bachelor's Project. The one i chose is about The role of internal states in everyday decision making.

📝 Academic Goals: ✨

- get better grades than last semester - try to understand early on the semester which way of studying works for me - go!!! to!! my profs!!! office time!!! for goodness sake, if you don't understand anything from your class, that's literally the best place to learn it - learn how to prioritize stuff - being up to date with my classes - maybe post my learning progress of all my classes?? idk if anyone would be interested in it, but i'll try to be more specific about what I'm learning

🍃🪻Free time:🪻🍃

I want to become much more intentional about my free time. Not just lying on the floor and doom scrolling. And also find ways to stop myself when I find myself going back to just waste energy doing stuff I'm not even enjoying

Specifically:

- read more books - keep watching some shows I've been putting behind bc i haven't feel like i was paying them enough attention. I've been saying this for over 2 years, get over it - exercise again. The cold always makes it so hard to exercise, but the weather is getting nicer, so i should go back to it soon

Part 2 (friendships and mental health) here

[struck-by-the-rain]

bored and on the train so have some miscellaneous karate joe headcanons, I've typed some of these out before but most r new! under the cut because it's long and idk if I wanna maintag this

the reading material is conflicted but in my head he's really good at karate! it does say somewhere that his style has a unique sense of rhythm and hes unsuccessful in competitions because his opponents can read his moves, but I think he gets past this by sticking to increasingly complex rhythms! he completes at the highest level that's there in the rh universe, like their equiv of the olympics or whatever. senior's standards for "mastering karate" are ill-defined and he probably keeps moving the goalposts (pun not intended) on joe

he's extremely overworked and over-stressed by his training, to the point where he has pretty bad chronic pain/repetitive strain injuries in his hands.

similarly im also considering hcing him being partially deaf in 1 ear from the first time his father introduced bombs into his training (& 1 exploded in his ear)

also he listens to music really loud on the reg and (like all my fav characters) hes autistic 2 me (so has audio processing issues to boot) so I think he needs 2 ask ppl to repeat themselves a lot

or he would, if he wasn't really shy and afraid of coming across as weak/useless/a disappointment! I've talked about that before but yeah. he masks it by trying to put on a tough guy persona & doesn't talk v much (he's a v expressive person as the games suggest but i think he actively tries to hide it most of the time)

he's a decent cook, having learned because seniors is so bad!! I need 2 give him a silly fav food other than pancakes (from honeybee remix...),,, my heart says he likes rly cosy things like soups and stews and everything

^ kinda fits vibes wise with how I like to draw him wearing comfy sweaters loads!! i think he's kinda winter-coded as a person but I'm not sure if it's actually his fav season or what!

in general he's not super fashion-y (makes it a challenge to draw him sometimes BC I love making characters dripped out),,, man lives in old band t-shirts and hoodies/sweaters and really knackered jeans

ohhh yeah this was a big 1 and I've said this before but he really likes the rockers (was a fan of jj's stuff pre-retirement and then when he comes back onto the scene w his student),,, I think he had a childhood crush on jj at one point

& I think he gets really into old games/consoles at some point, maybe because senior keeps them down in the basement in a box! he likes to take old consoles apart and figure out how they work

ummmmmm also he's like really scared of sucking at something (like a new hobby/sport or whatever)/disappointing others. idk I already said that

might think of more if so I'll just make an addition to this post

[infernothechaosgod]

Hey guys so the ask box's getting closed for a while probably like a week or so and so is the whole blog

explanation under

ever since that last ask telling me oswalds married to ortensia and its weird of me to use fanny i've had to deal with stuff like this sometimes popping up in my ask box

its been infersting my ask box at very random mostly bc I think its one person or few people since these asks are diffrently spelled and worded sometimes remembering im here and feeling this need to send me this sometimes, Despite me not posting that much (at least i think its not much) oswald x fanny content in the first place

I haven't been responding to these asks because i think one of the goals of theirs might be making me try to "slip up" by saying something like idk "ortensia sucks" in the fit of #internetRage and making my mutuals who like ortensia upset with me...but that obviously hasn't been working too well lol because

1 this stuff doesnt make me feel the need to respond and doesnt anger me more so sometimes saddnes me but not that much you know?

and 2 i dont think ortensia sucks or anything, shes there, i really like some versions of her i dont use her bc like i said already i dont know how to write her too well and i dont wanna force myself to add a whole character in because like...if idk how to write her how do you expect me to use her? Do you want me to just make her stand next to oswald and thats it? if thats it then I could argue thats far worse than not having her in like from writers perspective way worse

these asks have been attempting to more and more justify their rudness towards me like how above you can see they say its disrespectful to disney (thats a bonus for me mate), that me not using ortensia means im a bad writer and that fanny's been toxic to oswald in the old shorts, all these things make my head turn tbh I think there all very easy to debunk

Also fanny hasn't been used in over 90 years i think the point they were trying to make with that is im not creative/oryginal bc of not wanting to write ortensia bc "i could not think of anything to expand her" but like fanny's got way less screentime than ortensia and has never had a speaking role and I did or at least im attempring to do exactly that with her but they talk about her like i took an already existing freshed out character and used her bc its easier witch really confuses me more than upsets me in any way

Since I dont wanna start drama of any kind but also since these asks have been really getting on my nerves now i've decided to close the ask box and after making this post i'll probably log out for a while probably about a week, i'll return with tcc comic pages and hopefuly will get to open the ask box soon after, im sorry to everyone who wanted to aks me stuff ik there are still some asks in my box I haven't answeared yet that arent this stuff you'll get your answears when I comeback and clean my aks box thecause it looks atrocious right now

So yea see ya in a week yall im sorry for shutting the blog down for so long but I think focusing on my stuff and moving away from all this will do good for me

Please take care - flame ❤️

[rainbluealoekitten]

hey so i don't know you at all, but i saw on an old post that you did an IB eng lang+lit extended essay,,, and if you have ANY tips on choosing a topic for that i would literally appreciate it so much,, i have to choose my topic in the next 24 hours (procrastination </3) and i have vague ideas but no clue how i could structure them or what kinds of topics the IB prefers :/ literally any help, via dm or answering the ask, would be so so helpful ((( but no pressure ofc :] )))

omg hi babes, i'd be super happy to give my advice and i hope i'm not too late?

ok so you know the 3 categories i'm assuming? idk what your school is like but if you need more guidance on the ee in general, go to philpot's step by step guide

when you're told to pick something that interests you, DO THAT. you will spend MONTHS on this topic, researching and writing for hours upon hours, so you HAVE to be invested. even if you love love a topic, you might still struggle for a variety of reasons (my tips on this later on). regardless, you are on tumblr engaging in fandom and media for a reason. WHAT is that reason? what compels you? what themes, character dynamics, settings, motifs compel you? what shows, what books, what films? what about in lang and lit class? do you like ad analysis and the societal implications? do you prefer minute details that make a movie just so so good (e.g. lighting)? did you watch the dead poets society and you've been reading poetry aloud ever since?

the ib requires you to write about an "acclaimed" literary or non literary work, which gives you a LOT of choice. you could write about doctor who, for example.

i'll explain my process when i was picking my topic.

i have always liked greek mythology (like a LOT) and my favourite figure is akhilles. i decided i wanted to do something exploring his relationship with patroklos, but alas! i could not look at the iliad as it was not written in english originally, which didn't fit into either cat 1 or cat 2. so... why not the song of achilles? it's well known and acclaimed, plus would be more fitting for a dp level of literary analysis. but how to explore the characters? well... what else was i interested in?

what makes a character a hero?

this was the central question. i ended up changing the specifics of my question a million times which... don't do that. eventually, my question was (more or less), "how does miller conform to and subvert the characteristics of a hero through characterisation?" (that was not the question. i promise that the actual question was a million times better).

NOW. my extra note.

before you start researching and outlining, here is something i recommend you do before starting, based on my own issues. now, i did get a predicted (knock on wood) A, but after way too much deliberation.

make a list of your strengths and of your weaknesses. consider literary analysis vs diegetic and non diegetic sound analysis (idk if that's even what it's called but yk). consider time management skills. consider outlining skills. consider research skills. what do *you* need in terms of help and support from your supervisor? what do you need to do to help yourself? for example, i should have forced myself to pick a question from the start, before even starting research. this is an issue i have in other subjects too, and caused me a lot of grief for my history ia. i also asked my ee supervisor to help me come up with a realistic, step-by-step schedule bc i struggle assigning myself deadlines.

for the second part of your ask, structure is going to be super dependent based on your topic and category. i recommend reading examples similar to your topic (don't waste time reading ad analysis if you're doing poetry aha). i did mine with bg info on the classical view of heroes, then each bp was a different aspect (first conformity, then subversion). i have a friend who wrote hers on a feminist film and her bg was about feminist theory, with mentions of that time period, which then informed her fairly standard-structure analysis.

let me know if this helps in any way at all, and don't hesitate to reach out again if needed! i wish you the absolute best with the ee and dp more broadly :)

[bones-of-a-rabbit]

status of babbit's life yeehaw

tl,dr: busy moving and a couple of other big life things that just complicate things, but well on the way to being back to normal! new fic chapters and better quality art coming soon.

tl,wr (too long, will read):

Helloooo what's up its me, Babbit. or Rabbit. or Bones. or Idiot Moron Menace Child, idk im not picky lol

i know a lot of you guys have been wondering wtf is up with my upload schedule lately and the extreme lack of even basic content and also i am extremely aware that i have not updated my fics in a few millennia and for that i am very, very sorry. this post is to answer a few questions you might have, if anyone was curious about the 'reason' instead of just the 'when.'

my family and i have had a hell of a year, y'all. like, jesus christ, i really hope things level out and calm down for a while once we're moved in to our new apartment bc god damn we are so tired. the list goes: 1. we got kicked out of the house we were renting-to-own bc we wouldn't be able to afford the new rate, so they gave us two months to find a new place to live (not long enough, it turns out) and then foreclosed to get us out. 75% of our belongings were still in the house when we had to leave. that includes all of our christmas ornaments- including the ones kept for decades, and the ones made by me and my siblings, and the fancy ones made from blown glass. 2. the first night out of the house, one of our dogs, freaked out by the strangeness of the situation, panicked and slipped her harness and ran off. that was over a year ago. we haven't seen her since. 3. my cat got very ill and became unable to eat. she passed away almost exactly a year ago. she had been 14-15, and had been my baby since i was maybe 8. 4. one of the tires on my dads car blew out. during the night, while it was parked on the curb so he could put the spare on in the morning, one of the in-tact tires was fucking stolen LMAO 5. we applied to rent at so many places and got rejected so, so many times. it costs money to apply, btw. we're talking like $200+. no, u don't get that money back. 6. i lost my job bc knowing i would have to work 8 hours at a job that stresses me out to the point of exhaustion (at a place where no one takes me seriously and would actively laugh at me when i try to express my need to step away for a minute) sometimes paralyzed me and made me sick to my stomach and made me feel unable to leave the house, and i called out one too many times. a day after my birthday, too! 7. just recently, like within the last week, my dad's car got fuckin totalled!!!!!

THE GOOD NEWS IS WE OFFICIALLY, FINALLY, AFTER A SOLID YEAR, HAVE AN APARTMENT!!!!! I'LL HAVE MY OWN ROOM AGAIN!!! THERE'S AN ENTIRE KITCHEN!!!!!!!

the 'oh god' news is we still have to move in, and replace a lot of the stuff that we just couldn't take with us when we moved out (mostly stuff like bookshelves, dining table, dressers, etc) AND get the few things we could cram into a storage center out and moved into the new place, which isn't a lot but at the same time is more than we can realistically handle on our own. and then, we have to get my mums cats (a pair of kitty sisters that we had to temporarily house with my aunt, who got tired of looking after them and let them outside to be outdoor cats a few months ago. yes, this was an extremely shitty thing to do, and we've been working hard to get them back safely) AND my gecko (who my cousin has been looking after, even tho feeding him worms freaks him out LMAO yes i plan on compensating him) moved in, as well... basically oh my god there is so much to worry about but at the same time it's nice to have to worry about it bc it means we're making progress sdkfhsjdkfhdsjfh

basically i am just so tired but so busy and also thinkin abt so much im so sorry for lack of stuff but i am so looking forward to being able to bounce back, pls stick with me, it'll be sorted out soon i think and then i'll hit y'all with some good stuff i promise!!!!!!!

anyway thank u guys i love u and appreciate u all for sticking around