#idk if I have the motivation to wanna continue doing it
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So new update on the blog:
I found out who reported me and silentserenitystreet to Solmare. I won’t be naming them because I don’t want anymore drama and I’m too emotionally drained to wanna deal with them. What’s done is done so I’ll just have to move forward. I know I should be mad but I am just so tired that I just don’t care anymore.
The only thing I really have to say is their actions are very hypocritical and done with bad intentions. All of my edits were simply done for fun and to benefit the rest of the fandom. I don’t not profit off of my edits let alone claimed that i owned any of the art when obviously I don’t. But if I must I will begin to add notes under my edits that I do not own any of the art I’m editing. I will also avoid posting any collab art from obey me unless it’s from their promotional posts. Aside from that I’d rather avoid posting any collab art to avoid anymore strikes.
Sorry for the long post but I feel like it would only be fair to let you guys know why my first blog was wiped off the site. Thank you for reading this.
#obey me#obey me nightbringer#btw I’m still organizing my edits#but I feel so tired#idk if I have the motivation to wanna continue doing it#also I know that person will see this post somehow#cuz they’re always stalking my pages#I want nothing to do with them#I want them to leave me alone#I haven’t mentioned them or anything#so to have them to this to me and Serenity is sick#sorry but dickriding for a company#that doesn’t know you exist is crazy
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u ever think of a ship u like one-sidedly and wonder why tf u didn’t project onto them when suffering from a bad one sided crush
#this is abt valgrace#honestly i dont see jason as being into men he’s either straight or aspec to me (or both yk)#but leo is definitely into him#to me#and now i have the urge to write a fic abt them#like maybe a jason survived au or smthn#or maybe they resurrect him idk#i think it would be a bit too angsty if he was dead#(or it could be pre-death but idk if i wanna do that for a few reasons)#guys actually does anyone want that i think it would be fun to write#i needed smthn to write yk but this is still vague enough that if i wanna continue i might need more motivation or smthn#pjo#heroes of olympus#leo valdez#jason grace#valgrace#<- do i tag that if its one sided???#sorry if i offended u for this i can’t think straight rn#ryan shut the fuck up
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how does the raft not capsize.
#puppy rambles#yo-kai watch#yw3#i mean komasan's not there in canon 3 so it's slightly better but not by a lot#i feel like someone should at least be falling off how is the raft also big enough to hold them all-#whisper floats so he doesn't add weight or any space really but like#it still needs to both hold the weight of three teenagers and two yo-kai#AND have the room for them all to fit#the rafting challenge in bada-bing tower is probably worse cuz it has to fit two additional yo-kai#i think komasan not being that important in the mainline games is very lame. he's pretty important in the anime so it's kinda weird#he is at least somewhat important in 3 since he's there for the yopple tour and everything in bada-bing tower#whereas in 1 he has the auto-befriend yo-kai curse (only being important in their debut chapter)#and in 2 he literally only shows up during the jibakoma quest in psychic specters#(excluding being an npc during the beginning of the jibanyan's secret quest alongside a bunch of other yo-kai)#idk what's weirder the fact they made him so important in the anime despite that or the fact they never made him important in the games#i personally go with the nyanderful days continuity that he also moves in with katie cuz that makes sense to me#i've literally never written anything where nate's the one who gets the watch in 1 so idk what i'd do there-#(funny how i've never written anything that's in the same timeline as canon-)#i want to at least write something at somepoint where nate and katie both get watches cuz i like that idea#i mean i have a dumb au idea where nate and katie independently get watches at the start of 1 at around the same time#and take an extended period of time to realize#mostly just haven't actualized that cuz 1) i already have the rewrite and 2) i don't have enough ideas#basically just have the basic concept-#these tags got derailed quick. and also make me really wanna work on the rewrite more-#i have so many ideas but i'm just not motivated to write any of them#and also most of them are for 3 and i haven't finished rewriting 2 yet 😔#‚‚‚ anyways-
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Actively beginning to catch myself going down thought spirals and this has to be a good sign actually
#looking through my sketchbook and realizing ive had it for at least 2 or so years now#and am surprised by how much space is on the pages and how little i seem to have really drawn..#and I'm wondering if I'm putting too much stock and faith in the vehicle; especially now that the path to getting one#is a bit more protracted as i continue shopping around#i just suddenly feel so tired and had intended to draw but felt the motivation drain from me#it *is* past 9pm where i am so it could also just be that time of night as well but#I'm noticing I'm letting the potential vehicle do a lot of guiding here and you know. could be freeing to accept it as it comes#it was definitely a letdown to not get the one i test drove (too expensive) and to not have a car after expecting to have one#and being excited at the prospect of everything becoming easier; and it's definitely a feeling I'm allowed to have#but it's like. idk. i wanna reshape how I'm thinking about this i guess?#and trying to drive away the way i feel burnt out from work every other week but that's for another day. 8 hours is too damn long#shai speaks
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redrawing some ocs from my old comic, What In Hell (horrible name, stick with me) and the roomie told me i was in a steven universe phase and pointed out the way i do the anatomy starting bits as proof, thought he was talking about the way i do afros
#i do them really poofy (which duh!) but like#i feel like they have more weight so i make the big big big poofy ones the 4c ones look. weird? idk.#i also need to learn to do dreads and braids#i also wanna try wicks (Hobie hair) but first i wanna get into making good braids. i always have yrouble with the braids up bear the scalp#i think i make them too fat and then they look stupid#but i don't use references so that one is on me (hashtag stinky!!!)#i wanna put Sekani in long braids. or like. i saw this one guy at walmart with just th thickest batch of braids or dreads and had them-#-tied back and i was like '!!!! i like that!' and i wanna ro that for him so so so bad but i'm bad at sections for hair#i always have been i like drawing my hair as basically one continuous line one big like. “blob”#you know?#just having a lot of energy and drawing motivation rn#wih posting#barking out loud
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At long last: either an alternate explanation for or continuation of my prior comic regarding how Bill was ABSOLUTELY naked in Ford's karaoke night drawing. (Because errors in art do not exist. Artists do not make mistakes. So if you see any in this comic, No You Do Not.)
I am so normal about these old dorks.
I'm not really clear on exactly when Bill started throwing his desperation book at Ford just like a needy ex do, but I find it extremely funny to imagine it happening literally the day of or after the makeshift funeral. Bill just gets this weird sense of 'Ford is taking steps to move on' and CANNOT FUCKING ABIDE.
I hope you enjoy all the goofy things I added to each page of Bill's sad spieling. (Everything SHOULD be readable so long as you view the full size, but I have added basically this whole little fanfic in the image descriptions, LMAO, which lays out all the little written notes and such.) Also don't ask how Bill managed to sneak that vampire pen in there. I have no idea, and honestly? I don't wanna know.
Oh, and a little bonus comic:
Of course Bill would take it as flirting. Because between the two of them, Bill is the bigger masochist By Far. :)
Also I have continued applying The Good Place logic to any of Bill's attempts to swear. Case in point, one last bonus image, this time with a motivational line from my slapdash Theraprism OC, EV-01:
Yes, its name is just 'love' backwards. No, I will not be taking any feedback on this. Yes, EV-01 was only ever assigned to Bill's case due to the Theraprism being desperate to make some progress in rehabilitating him. No, it did not work anywhere close to staff's expectations - Bill didn't even appreciate EV-01's matching fondness for bowties! (He claimed the fondness to be "cultural appropriation" and insisted he'd been traumatized by it.)
Anyway, if you like my stuff, reblogs are very much appreciated, and if you really really like it, perhaps consider my commissions or yeeting a teeny tiny tip my way? I am trying to recoup over 500 dollars in vet bills, ahaha... 🙃
In other news, I loved all the fun tags people added to the prior naked-karaoke comic (such as 'the hat and bow-tie stay ON during sex' and the classic '[insert keysmash here]', as well as the many amused/bewildered remarks about how I either made the bricks a piece of clothing or just straight up peeled Bill's skin off). However, I think my favorite thing by far was the several people losing their shit over the fact that I gave Bill toes. Like, excuse me? The magical talking triangle can have fingers but not toes??? Since when was that a rule????? 🤣 (Also the one person who reblogged with the cropped panel where Bill's fishnets pants are falling off to ask why Bill peed himself. Dude, I want to examine your brain...?)
Okie-dokie, I'm sick of looking at all of this stuff now and I'm off to go to work, after which I will either scribble some more goofy "Billford" comics or perhaps draw my lame human!Bill in Situations, idk yet. Maybe I'll even finally draw more than just a single other person's human!Bill...? Who knows, but I sure hope I can mix it up a little and not turn whatever I draw into a month-long fukken project. >:\
#fanart#gravity falls#billford#bill cipher#stanford pines#the book of bill#comics#i can't believe gravity falls and billford keep on trending almost three full months after the book of bill's release#this is incredible#maybe i will add more tags later idk#i have to go to WORK now blehhhhhh#oh right: Do Not Repost (good luck anyway lol. this is So Many images and all of them are Big XD)
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hi sorry i keep coming back and vanishing all the time ily all and am trying to be active again LOL
#i feel like so much has happened within the past like year and a halfish that i havent been active for and im just like#trying to figure out the priorities in my life again#and one thing ive come to notice is that I MISS WRITING SO FUCKIN MUCH I want to write so much again but i have no inspiration#but i was reading back some of my older stuff today and was like..... MAN I REALLY LIKE MY WRITING STYLE#and ik that sounds like concieted or whatever but im so over being self depricating and want to celebrate the things i like about myself!!!#like im a good person and deserve good things!!! i still feel down from time to time ofc but like#i feel like ive made so many steps in my self worth especially these past couple of months#and i want to do things that im proud of again LIKE WRITING#like holy fuck especially when i write awsten I feel like i get his voice and mannerisms down PERFECT and sometimes im left in awe of#my own skills LMFAO LIKE IDK I WANNA BE PROUD OF SMTH AGAIN!!!!#ive been trying to focus on those kinds of good things lately and its been really good but i wish i had the motivation to DO#SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!!!!! AH#idk im rambling but long story short im really trying lately and i wanna continue to do things that bring a smile to my face#so HOPEFULLY that means more writing to share here I HOPE AAAAH#bee buzzes
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Kurt teaching you German numbers, his methods are very encouraging. 18+ under cut. MDNI.
This crossed my mind, and I think it's super hot. But maybe it's just meee idk 😖 It's all for fun anyway. I have trouble retaining information so I figured Kurt would come up with something to help you remember if you have the same issue. <3
Warnings: More dominant Kurt bc I wanna see more this side of him, it's not too crazy. Afab reader, sex toys, praise, orgasm denial, slight overstimulation, oral (reader giving), he uses his tail~ Not edited, please ignore grammar mistakes!
WC: 1.8k
You didn't speak German, when you met Kurt you vowed you'd try to learn. You asked him to help you from time to time, and he gladly did. He always praised you for words you got write, and gently corrected you or helped you when you got something wrong or simply couldn't remember. But even if you missed a day, you forgot everything. It was frustrating for you, how you couldn't retain something so simple. Kurt knew how you felt, so he thought he might change up the lessons to make them a bit more...interactive.
"We will start off easy, liebling." he hummed and sat in front of you, looking down at you on the floor. You were trembling and looking up with anticipation, biting your lip, squirming slightly on the vibe he had on your cunt. "Numbers. One through ten, ja?" he turned the vibe on a low setting, enough to jerk you up slightly, but not enough for you to reach your peak.
"Okay..." you rasped, crawling to be more sat between his legs. He chuckled and watched you fondle his growing bulge in his underwear. "Naughty liebchen..." he cooed, "Wait."
With a reluctant whine, you stopped and looked up at him again. Your cheeks were much hotter from the situation, he hadn't ever been this way before, but you weren't complaining.
"One." he said calmly, his tail curled up at the end as he watched you.
"Eins." you replied softly, your legs trembling. You could feel your core dampening, your clit throbbed against the dull vibration from the vibe. He grinned down at you, nodding. "Good. That's correct..." a press on the remote made the vibrator increase a notch, which in turn made you feel more pleasure.
"And what's two?" he asked, slowly pulling himself free, his cock slowly hardening as his hand stroked it. Your eyes were glued to his pretty cock, the tip beading already and you wanted to taste him.
"Zwei," you said back, hoping he'd let you suck him now. He saw your wants, but he didn't give in just yet. You were only on two after all, you needed to remember more than that first.
"Ah, good...three." he continued, hitting the next button to increase the vibrations. The second setting felt good, but not enough for you. You wanted more, and he saw your hips squirming. He smiled at you, he was unbelievably hot right now, it wasn't fair.
"Three." he whispered, "Make it to five and I'll let you cum." he promised, his hand steadily stroking himself. The promise of your climax made you feel more motivated, you were pretty confident so far. "Drei," your answer came out with a slight whine, and the vibe increased again, the third setting beginning to make a louder hum and your legs shook more.
"Das ist gut...you are doing so good." he whispered, "How about four and five? Can you remember four and five?" he asked, his hand moving a little faster on his cock. You bit your lip, spreading your legs slightly as you practically made a pool under you with how much you were leaking. "Ah...a-ah...v-vier...and....fünf..." you moaned loudly as he hit the button twice and the vibrations increased two notches.
He hummed and his tail tapped your back, urging you to scoot closer. "You did well, how about I let you reach your first orgasm? You remembered one through five, you deserve it don't you?" he reached down and cupped your face, his cock almost touching your lips but not close enough.
"Y-yes...." you whined, his finger pushed into your mouth gently and he tsked, so you corrected yourself. "Ja..." a bit muffled with his finger but...he got the gist. He nodded, his tail trailed your spine and moved between your legs. His spade cupped your pussy, feeling how wet you were and his eyes glistened.
"What a naughty girl. You are so turned on by this, hm? I had no idea this is what would get you to remember. I suppose we shall do this anytime you need a German lesson, won't we?" he pulled his thumb out of your mouth and held your chin, pulling you closer to his cock. It throbbed slightly, the head dripping sticky precum for you.
"Do you like when I am like this? You probably didn't expect it from me...but I assure you liebling...I can be however you want me to be." Kurt hummed and rubbed his cock on your lips. "Not yet..." he teased, his tail gently pressing your soaked entrance. "Tell me one through five again, sweetheart."
You were dizzy, you never thought Kurt could act like this, but hell, you weren't going to tell him to stop. You shifted, your back arching slightly, trying to get more of him to poke into you, but he anticipated this and withdrew his tail. "Kurt," you whined, pouting before reciting the numbers in German.
"Was that so hard?" he questioned, a playing smirk on his lips as his tail pushed back against you. Between his tail toying with you and the vibe, you weren't far from your orgasm. He worked you for a bit, until he felt you push your face into his thigh, moaning loudly as you felt your orgasm hit you. Your entire body shook with the shocks of it, the vibe was right on your swelling clit and it felt so intense that you swear the vibrations went straight to your toes.
"Ah...that's it...let yourself go, liebe...you're so good." he praised and groaned to himself, seeing you reach your peak almost got him to his own, his hand stroking himself hastily. When your orgasm was over, you whined and panted from the intense sensation still humming on your clit. He chuckled seeing your blissed out face, though slightly wincing from the overstimulation. "You are so beautiful...you feel so wet on my tail, liebe...can you get to ten?"
"A-aah...nngh, Kurt..." you whimpered, "S-s'too much..." you panted and held his legs. He shook his head and smiled, "Get to ten...then I'll give you a break."
He continued the slow count to ten, when he got to eight, you couldn't remember what it was. "Nngh...I-I don't remember..." you whined, your second orgasm right there....so, so close! You were right on the edge and about to teeter off when he cut the vibe's power. Your throat caught a strangled cry and you looked up at him. Your eyes held betrayal and he laughed softly.
"You know our deal, schatz...each number you get correct increases the power...for one you get wrong, you cannot come." he said calmly, explaining it in a teasing manner. His head tilted slightly, his hair curling at the ends and falling over his forehead. "Let's try again...from one."
You groaned and pouted, your forehead pressing against his leg. "Fine..." you muttered, feeling a little stubborn but obliging. One look up at him and your resolve melted away. You leaned up and kissed his tip before he could say anything in response. "Eins, zwei, drei." You said quickly, "Vier, fünf, sechs." your tongue dashed out and licked over his tip, tasting him. Your tongue took its time, slowly rolling over his head and pressing against the slit to get more of his precum.
"Sieben..." you trailed off and thought about what eight was, you had forgotten before. "Er..." you frowned, your brow furrowing in thought. His cock head came into view, you kissed the tip and suckled. "Oh! Acht!" you said proudly, making Kurt smile widely.
"Ja! Ja, das war gut!" he laughed and held the remote up a bit, turning the vibe back on. The vibrations weren't as strong as they were but they were slowly building back up. "Now what about nine and ten...?"
You moaned loudly, your already sensitive clit being stimulated raw like this made you more ready to cum a second time. The intensity of right before your climax overwhelmed you and the sensation continued. You felt like you were balancing on the rope right before free falling to pleasure, the vibrations just needed to be slightly more powerful...
"N-Neun...." you rasped, hot breath hitting his hard dick and he had to hold everything back, maintaining his composure so you completed the exercise. "A...and...zehn!" you weren't sure on that last one, but spat it out anyway.
Kurt was relieved too, he needed more from you just as you needed more from him. "Ja, good, you got them!" he turned the vibe up and he cradled the back of your head, pulling you to his cock and pushing past your lips. He bobbed your head and he groaned, "Ja...so gut...I know you've wanted this." he grunted out of a clenched jaw, his tail continuing to caress your pussy.
"More, liebling...I'm close." he warned, guiding you to bob your head quicker. Your hand reached down and fondled his balls, rolling them gently and earning louder groans from him. Each noise he made shot pleasure straight to your core. "Mmn, mmf!" you looked up at him as you tried to take more of him than you were used to.
You gagged slightly, but that didn't stop your determination. He watched with half lidded eyes as you tried your best to deepthroat him while your orgasm hit you. Your nose buried into his pubic hair, saliva dripped down his balls as your tongue pressed against his cock and protected the underside of him from your teeth. You muffled a cry as your body shook from the force of your climax rushed through you.
His eyes roll back and he jerks his hips up slightly, soon hot ropes of cum shoot out into your throat, coating your tongue as he pulls back so you don't choke. The sticky fluid fills your mouth and you eagerly drink it down. He feels you swallowing and he waits until you get it all, then he pulls himself out of your mouth.
"Oh, liebling...c'mere." he pulled you up, your poor legs trembled as you stood. He turned the vibe off and removed it from you, looking at your swollen and reddened clit. "Poor little button," he smirked and leaned down, laying a kiss against it. You moaned loudly when his lips touched your throbbing bud and he pulled back before it became too much.
He gave you that charming smile, and your exhausted face couldn't help but smile back. He would be the death of you, you swore. He pulled you into his lap and held you, kissing your neck and cheeks in a loving manner. He adored you more than anything else, and he loved how the two of you could have fun and explore these kinds of things together.
"You know...if you ever want to learn German colors..." he trailed off, flashing a mischievous grin. Maybe you could go for another lesson.
Thanks for reading.
*BAMF*
dividers by @/adornedwithlight
Cover images: Immortal X-Men #7 (2022)
#kurt wagner#nightcrawler#kurt wagner x reader#nightcrawler x reader#kurt wagner smut#nightcrawler smut#x men#x men 97#xmen#🎠my works
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Pedro’s Characters: The Dick-tionary
How big are Pedro Pascal’s characters and some NSFW headcannons
(WARNING: DETAILS OF PENISES AND TALKS OF SEX - MDNI)
Part Two <3
A/N: Sorry I never continued Fluff February :(, I lost motivation so I’ll just write them and post them as a prompt list for whenever…
Joel Miller:
Okay, all his characters are big, it’s a known fact, but Joel is 100% the biggest. Probably about 8.5 inches, with a pretty pink mushroom tip, and GIRTHY AGH! There’s a vein on it that is really visible when he’s hard. Oh and his balls are big too. Everything about Joel is just big. Not only is he big but you best believe he knows how to use it too. He’s got a daddy kink… Fav positions are missionary and cowgirl, however when he’s angry doggy or the mating press are a no-brainer. Daddy kink! DOMINANT!!! There’s no way this man is a sub, it just doesn’t work, he’s just so dom yknow, and when he’s soft, he’s the sweetest he’s ever been, but if he’s angry, hard dom Joel comes out and that’s a man you don’t wanna piss off if you wanna cum. He’s got such a daddy kink. “Fuck babygirl/boy, you’re so fucking sweet, sugar. So fucking good for daddy. Yeah baby? You like that? Such a good little girl/boy, so fucking sweet.” Daddy kink is such is a big thing for him. Hair wise? Well it’s the apocalypse so it’s probably hard to find the Manscaper 3000 or whatever. He trims his hair with some scissors, honestly he didn’t really care for shaving before you, so he just let it grow, but once when you were sucking him, you almost sneezed from how much it tickled your nose and made a little joke about it after, which made Joel feel a little bad so he cut them just a little shorter. Oh I’m sorry and did I mention… DADDY KINK!!!
Javier Peña:
(Here I’m purely writing about Javier Pena in a fictional sense AS PEDRO, not the real guy, this has nothing to do with the real Javier Pena)
Okay, Javier, my baby daddy. Um, who said that- ANYWAYS! Javier is probably the second biggest, in joint place with Oberyn, definitely about 7-7.5 inches, as he’s nicknamed by moi, the Pussy Slayer of Medellin. It goes without saying that Javier is rough, as we’ve seen, side note: I don’t know why I thought watching Narcos with my family would be a good idea… I was sat on the couch like “😀 okay, I’m watching Pedro have sex next to my mum, just a normal Saturday morning…” anyways back to it (hehe Negan reference) but Javier is rough, doggy and cowgirl are his favourite positions, but sometimes when he’s feeling a little somber he likes a little missionary. As how domestically-kinky I like my men, I’m a little disappointed that Javier isn’t a committed man, but he does have a tiny 🤏 breeding kink, he defo isn’t a fan of being called daddy, in fact just call him Javi and he’s yours, and he’s dom obviously. “Oh carino, you take my cock so well, you good little whore… fuck… my sweet little angel.” I mean, we’ve all seen his hair, so do we really need address it, that also might genuinely be my fav sex scene in all of cinema history.
Oberyn Martell
Okay, admittedly, I haven’t seen any proper scenes of Oberyn, because I’ve just started GOT, so I have no clue what his character is like apart from being a HUGE BISEXUAL SLUT, so he’s just like me 🤭
Oberyn, tying with Javier, is about 7-7.5 inches, and I feel like his cock is definitely a lot more tan than others, idk why, it’s just an instinct. Defo uncircumcised. His fav positions are definitely cowgirl OH and dude is the literal definition of a pillow prince, again, just like me. Suck his dick, please, just suck his dick. Again, I don’t know how he’s presented in GOT, but I’m like 74% sure he’s dominant? From the clips I’ve seen 🫣 Hair wise, do razors exists in the GOT world? Or does my man just shave himself with a sword.
Javi Gutierrez:
Oh my sweet baby Javi… he’s so kinky. I’m fully convinced he’s into full BDSM, not so much where he has to do it every single time, but maybe like once a month. When I was watching TUWOMT for the first time, when Nick is about to go into the room with all his merch and stuff, I was dead convinced it was gonna be a sex dungeon. There’s no way a man is this sweet and adorable without being into some freaky shit.
Anyway, Javi is about 6.5 inches, with a sweet pink tip and he’s definitely a giver not a taker, don’t get him wrong, he ADORES you with his dick in your mouth, but he prefers to eat you out/suck your dick for hours on end. Oh and he’s a sweet talker, when you guys aren’t being full kinky, he’ll praise you to hours on end, mumbling in your ear how good you are in that sexy accent of his. Is a little bit of a switch, but mostly dominant, soft dom if it’s a normal night but if it’s that special night, only your safe word will pull him out of hard dom space. Definitely the type to overstimulate you in a sweet way “you can take it right sweetheart? Mi amor~ just take my cock nice and good, ahí tienes.” Um, daddy kink for surely, but not like every single night like Joel. But when he’s between your legs, and he’s stimulated you so far into sub space, and you’re struggling to keep your eyes open, and you’re reaching up for him, babbling how good his cock feels in your hole, he can’t help but coo down at you and praise you so hard. He’s not bald, but his hair isn’t long, just trimmed to the point where it tickles your nose when you suck his cock.
Din Djarin
Okay, so I think it’s canon that Din hasn’t really ever felt human touch, so I feel he’s really inexperienced… but the dude’s got a pretty dick. Like it’s just so… pretty. About 6 inches with a sweet baby pink tip, he’s so sensitive too. He loves head but he really can’t say it, he’s just too embarrassed. I just get the vibe that he’s mostly subby. He tried to be dom once but the poor baby couldn’t handle it all. But then he tried again and he did so good, but it tired him out, so if he’s domming, which is once in a blue moon, he’s going to be soft, maybe even softer than Javi. Mommy/Daddy kink!! “Please, I’m good right? Please, please tell me I’m doing good… you always feel so so good, I love you so much.” Please, he’s so sweet I love him. It’s rare that you guys get off together because of reasons due to his upbringing and stuff so he just likes being taken care of, the sweet boy. Before you, he never really cared for shaving, so when you first strip together, he’s a little nervous about it, and then after that he trims it, quite short.
Marcus Moreno
If anyone says this man is a hard dom they’re just kidding themselves, this man is the sweetest man out there, obviously not as much as Din ofc <3.
Marcus has an obsession with using his hands, making you cum just by fingering you. Then when he’s inside you, he slips his fingers into your mouth, or around your neck, or on your cheek. His dick is about 7 inches, and like everyone else, knows how to use it perfectly. Angel is one of his favourite nicknames to call you. “My perfect Angel, taking my cock so good baby…” whilst hes thrusting into you ever so gently. Would never EVER do it when Missy is around, so quickies before picking Missy up from school are his go to, but he loves the days where his mom can take her out for the day or even a grandma sleepover so he can be with you for hours. You under him, over him, him inside you, his good girl/boy, his good angel. Pleasuring you until you get numb. The armpit hair in the scene of the gif gets me and idk why, I have never had a thing for armpit hair but maybe I’m just really horny, but his hair down there is nice and trimmed, not bald, never bald.
Tim Rock(Hard)Ford
Here we go…
Oh Tim man! I have a teensy 🤏 detective kink so when Pedro played this role it was over for me.
Maybe it’s the greying, like Joel, but I feel like he’s huge, just like Joel. He’s 8 inches, living his best life. But he’s just a tired old man, so when he gets home, please just get on your knees for him, he’ll just lay there, stroking your hair, praising you, telling you how good you suck his cock. Then he’ll bring you up to the bed and return the favour, making sure to always get you to tell him about your day as he does so. Saturday nights are always his favourite time to rail into you, he’s had the whole day off, just resting, watching you walk around, getting him so worked up. He has a domestic kink. So seeing you do chores get him so hard. Loves fucking between your thighs when you’re sleeping because he gets home so late and just needs a little relief, but you look so cute and peaceful while you sleep and because he’s so considerate, he doesn’t wanna wake you. “So good for me baby, so good for daddy, gonna fill you up, you’re not gonna let any of my cum slip out right, gonna keep it all in your tummy, yeah, that’s it, cum for me.” TALKS YOU THROUGH IT!!! Sleeps naked. Not trimmed, not shaved, just grows it out, he’s old so he doesn’t care, it’s not like anyone but you would be seeing him like this anyways.
Dieter Bravo
I love Dieter, he’s so cute.
Not dom, but not sub either, just dom enough to see you break under him but sub enough to whimper and get soooo desperate. Such a huge pillow prince, he loves it when you suck him, especially when you grab his balls and caress them, he cums so quick when that happens. He’s about 6.5 inches, and it loves fast, not as in quickie, but he loves seeing you fall apart as he jackhammers into your hole. When you ride him he gets so sweet, and he can last long, don’t worry, but you just look so pretty on top of him, he can’t help it, please don’t be mad at him. Has a thing for dry humping, especially in the morning when he’s too lazy to move properly. “So good baby, oh yeah, fuck, grind against me just like that, mmmf fuck…” loves to beg and watch you beg, he’s so good to and for you, don’t doubt him ever. He doesn’t shave, he trims it, but he’s so goofy, so once he shaved it into a heart.
#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal smut#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#javier peña#javier pena x reader#javier pena smut#javi gutierrez#oberyn martell#din djarin#marcus moreno#tim rockford#dieter bravo#slvtforoldermen
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telepatía
pairing: idol!jk x model!oc
genre: fluff!
“a kilómetros estamos conectando”
—synopsis: when you’re getting ready for a party and jungkook, who’s thousands kilometers away from you, wants to video call.
word count: 1,082
warning: ldr, they’re disguisingly so cute, the word “baby” was said for about 1 million times it’s sickening, different timezones, oc dress in front of jk, mention of insomnia, anxiety, stress, mention of an uncomfy situation of oc where other men were being men, protective jk (this jk is not a manipulator, trust), 1st person pov(im so sorry)
author’s note: my second drabble/fluff!!! this was shorter than I wanted it to be but there will be few (idk how many, it depends to the future me) series of idol!jk x model!oc. <the meaning of ‘mahal ko’ means ‘my love’ in filipino>
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
Taking a cold shower after having an intense leg day plus cardio at the gym hits so different. I feel like a brand new person after getting out of my bathroom. I then settle down in front of my vanity table and begin doing my skin care + makeup. As I finished a smooth base of foundation, my phone vibrated.
2 messages received from
mahal ko🐰🤍
|| hey baby
|| can we facetime plz? wanna see u
[10:33 pm]
his text was unanticipated at this hour since it’s 5 am in Korea.
me
|| sure bb
[10:34 pm]
mahal ko wants to facetime
drop everything i have with my hands, i swiftly hit the green button, eagerly to see and hear his voice. we’re mostly texting these days because of having different time zones and working schedules to follow. Oftentimes when he’s free and wants to facetime me, I would be either at work or sleeping and vice versa.
“hi pretty!!” he cheerfully greeted me as my phone screen revealed his cute sleepy face. As usual, he’s wearing one of the eight Supreme beanies i got for him when I was in Tokyo. [side story: i was just strolling in the streets of Harajuku when i found this one clothing store that has a lot of stuffs i know jungkook would like and that’s when i bought those comfy beanies along with other nice things]^_^
“helloo, my ggukie can't sleep?” i asked while finding something i can lean my phone on so that i can continue doing my makeup
“응.. i'm trying to sleep but can’t.“ he simply explained as he placed his phone on the side of his bed, moving his naked body to a more comfortable lying position. His arm filled with cool, artistic tattoos is out and on sight, while his other arm were covered with the thick white comforter, so as his entire body.
“What's been going on in your mind?” I know that something is bothering him at times like this. i get that having the job and lifestyle he has, isn’t merely easy. the pressure, the media, the fans, everything. But although he deals with all these things, I never once heard him complain about them because he knows that that’s what he signed up for the day he chose to pursue being an idol.
“Just been stressed lately with rehearsals and I'm still jet lagged, maybe I have insomnia? ‘m not sure but it’s driving me crazy. now i get what u mean when u say ur body is tired and ready to sleep but ur mind isn’t.” he further describes how he feels. The worry and anxiety is written in his facial expression.
“my poor kookie you could’ve call me earlier and i would help you to fall asleep”
“but you were at the gym. i know you like blasting reggaeton music while working out.” he pouty responds. well, in his defense he’s right. I love that he remembers small details about me but nothing can top my love for him.
“i do that but I prefer listening to my boyfriend’s angelic voice while working out so that i’ll have motivation to do more reps.” replied to him right off the bat. realistically i meant what i said. I usually don’t like talking to people when doing workouts but he is an exception.
I received no words but a soft laugh. He must have thought I was kidding. I took a glance at him before I put lipgloss on[his favorite shade].
i can see him covering the blush he has all over his face. i'm very glad to see him having relief.
‘’Where is my pretty girl up to? hmm?” he curiously asks as i put highlights as my last step to finish up the look
“just going to the club for Sakura’s birthday party, i'm running out of social energy almost every day because of work and parties but I can't miss this event” I explained as I headed over to my walk-in closet.
“hmm ‘kay tell her i said happy birthday. what are you gonna wear?”
“well i'm debating on wearing a black leather mini skirt with this asymmetrical black top and for shoes i have this black knee high boots or i just go with this simple black mini backless dress with these red bottoms high heels” i say as i show him all the clothes. he and I almost have the same taste in fashion. if we were to combine all of our clothes, they are pretty much all black. whenever it’s shoes, jackets, tops, pants, etc. this is why buying clothes for one another isn’t difficult for us.
“What did I tell you about mini skirts bb?” oh. i forgot that he allows me to wear mini skirts unless i’m with him since an incident happened when i was in the club and random guys were making me so uncomfortable by giving disguising lust looks and nastily commenting on my skirts. Although he and I know that no matter what a girl wears, guys in the clubs will act like animals regardless. He told me to not wear it because he’s controlling me but rather because he won’t be there to protect me if something happens.
“ok then the second choice it is” i confirmed, putting the first outfit choice back to where they belong.
“how about you wear that mini skirt when we go on a date? how’s that sound?” he suggests.
“ok then ggukie”
“dress in front of me?” he boyishly asks, using his deep alluring voice. He definitely knows what he’s doing. How can I say no to him?
After dressing, I proceeded to put on the Cartier necklace with his initials in it that he gifted to me when he first came to visit my penthouse in Chicago.
“still have my oversized leather jacket with you?” he inquire before he yawned
“yupp, why?” I curiously asked
“bring it with you please. i don’t want you getting cold in there” he softly requested. him and his simple gestures make me fall in love with him deeper.
“i will baby thank you”
“i love you ___, don’t look at other men” jk murmur jokingly. Well, I hope he said that in a humorous way for the reason that I assure him with my sincere words almost every hour.
“ I love you more gguk i’ll update you ok?” he just hums, waving his hands leisurely to say goodbye.
#jungkook fluff#jungkook fanfiction#jungkook x reader#jungkookxreader#jungkook imagine#jeon jk#jungkook ff#jjk x you#bts jk#jungkook fic#jeon jungkook#SoundCloud
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Yknow what, I might as well see what happens
Gonna do the notes game, just gonna see what happens I dunno (I have a lot of stuff I need to do and no motivation so I’ll use the internet to force me to)
25 notes - I’ll finish reading Good Omens
50 notes - I’ll finish pulp musicals (I started it and got distracted, came back an hour later so damn confused I HAD MY EARBUDS IN AND EVERYTHING)
100 notes - I’ll draw more (both traditionally and digitally, I want to improve)
150 notes - I’ll continue writing a coffee shop au I started last October and never finished (it was like 75 pages and I just stopped :()
200 notes - I’ll listen to Starry
250 notes - I’ll try to get at least a 70% in Spanish this quarter
300 notes - I’ll clean my room
350 notes - I’ll work on eating healthier
500 notes - I’ll spend more time with my friends outside of school
750 notes - I’ll finish listening to all the musicals on my musical watch list (there are so many of them…)
1000 notes - I’ll get back to doing taekwondo
1500 notes - I’ll take a walk every day
2000 notes - I’ll spend more time with my family
2500 notes - I’ll rewrite my really bad Xehaqus fic from 2 years ago and try my hardest not to just delete all of it (I’d be rewriting 183 pages, I dunno I wanna see how I’d write it now without changing the entire plot)
3000 notes - I’ll actually start to study for school and not just wing it
4000 notes - I’ll stop being such an asshole to my parents Jesus Christ how do they deal with me
5000 notes - I’ll come out to my mom as trans
Try and reach the goal before uhhhhh I dunno April 16th
I may add more later, depends on how fast yall go through the goals, I have a lot of things I need to do (mainly because I need to start caring about my health and how I treat other people). I dunno, let’s see how this goes
Edit kinda did the “come out to my mom” thing soooooo idk I’ll figure something out for 5000 (maybe)
#note game#Yall im so bored#And I need motivation#And also I need to start being like… a decent person#Idk man#I probably shouldn’t be needed to do some of these things but also peer pressure is a wonderful thing#And I’m just kinda a mess rn#Hopefully 4th quarter for school goes well#Fingers crossed?
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Me when I'm so entirely normal about this character, he so queer and neurodivergent coded<3
Your honour his religious trauma are his daddy issues, i consider him not responsible for anything he's ever done
Say what you will about the Hellaverse's colour palette but there is power in evoking an incredible emotional response by making a character's eyes like a little more orange than yellow
I wanted God to be quite a loving and gentle entity but also very motive driven, He did make these things for an intended purpose and He's not upset when they stop being useful, they just aren't a part of plan anymore so He moves on, tools break after a certain amount of uses, they get warped into new shapes, put em aside, get out something else and continue
and a favourite tool gets worn the quickest
God is surprisingly physically affectionate with archangels but it is getting hugged by mist, idk maybe that is comfortable compared to how touch adverse the rest of heavenborn culture is
Anyway both Lucifer and God have fun dialogue quirks that I wanna talk about, they both have to do with capitalizing nouns and pronouns in reference to Him
God's committing crimes against English grammar by only capitalizing references to Himself and structuring the rest of the punctuation around that, God said "the sentence starts when I show up"
Every character will inherently use capital nouns and pronouns with God in dialogue, except for Lucifer who was assigned a terminal case of disrespectful at birth and has to consciously choose to use capitals, hence him using "(Y)ou" at first but dropping into lowercase after being startled
him wanting to show his Father respect and also paying enough attention to remember about it are 2 pretty rare events especially to overlap so you won't catch him doing it very often
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel lucifer#hellaverse#hazbin hotel headcanon#hazbin hotel fanart#hazbin hotel headcanons#hazbin hotel god
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dysphoria | angel dust
ship/pairing: Angel dust x trans!male!reader (reader has a uterus and still gets his period)
fandom: Hazbin Hotel
request: Can I request Angel Dust comforting his trans boyfriend when he gets his period and is extremely dysphoric and depressed about the whole thing. This whole week has been a shit fest of dysphoria and crying.
warnings: maybe ooc idk , I didn't clarify in my writing but first confession of love i guess, periods, gender dysphoria, swearing, crying, emotional breakdowns, petnames (reader gets called baby), rushed ending, bad sex joke
word count: 758
A/N: sorry this is really short i have zero motivation to do anything 👍 fem and cis readers dni
You didn’t even need to tell Angel what was happening, nor did he need to ask. The second he saw your face contorted into one of discomfort, he was all over you. He hung up a dozen ‘do not disturb’ signs on your hotel room door (though it was basically a shared room at that point), prepared to verbally or physically attack anyone trying to disturb you. Before you could even mention cramps he had a heat pack fresh out the microwave for you, checking every five minutes if it was still warm or if you wanted it reheated. He would cuddle you tightly, him and Fat Nuggets doing their very best to cheer you up. Angel showed how much he truly cared for you. You couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend than him. However you felt nothing he could do would make the dysphoria you felt go away. He’s an amazing boyfriend but unfortunately he can’t stop your period or give you a dick. (he could do the second one if you asked him nicely)
”Ok I think this is all the chocolate in the entire hotel, I refilled your water, and I got you some of those snacks you like.” Angel listed as he sat on the bed beside you, dumping the food in your lap before readjusting the pillows wedged between your head and the wall, wanting to make sure you were as comfortable as you could be.
”Ange, you didn’t have to do all that.” you mumbled despite knowing it was pointless and he would continue to insist on helping you.
He pulled you closer to him, letting you rest your head against his shoulder, “I told you it’s fine. I want nothin’ more than for you to be happy.”
You lazily snuggled up to him. Dealing with your period and the gender dysphoria that tagged along with it tended to drain your energy, "Thanks. I really appreciate you helping me with this."
Angel's arm snaked around your waist, holding you close to him, "Of course baby. But of the list of things I'd do for you, this is pretty mild. If your period was a person I swear I'd fuck 'em up real bad. Make 'em regret ever makin' you feel this way."
You couldn’t tell if it was just your hormones going batshit or not, but Angel’s words had you burst into tears. You quickly buried your face in the crook of his neck as he pulled you into a tight but comfortable hug.
”You’re ok babe, I’ve got you, just let it out,” his whispers comforted you as his hand gently rubbed up and down your back soothingly, not even caring that your tears were staining his shirt.
Shaky breaths left your lips as you cried, “I'm grateful you're helping me. But I hate this. I hate my body. I hate it so fucking much.” your voice cracked as more tears rushed down your face. Angel was quick to pull out of the hug and cup your face, his eyes on you as his thumb caressed your cheeks. “It’s not fair.”
Tears brimmed Angel’s eyes, his heart breaking at your words, “I know baby. And you're right, it’s not fair. And you don’t deserve to feel this way one bit.” he pressed his lips to your forehead, “You hear me?" you gave a small nod as his thumb wiped away your tears, "And you're not your body. You're the hottest, the funniest, the kindest, the strongest, and the most handsome - yeah you're the most handsome and hottest man I’ve ever met, who also happens to be the best boyfriend in the world. And I wanna do anythin' to help you with this pain."
A small smile grew on your lips as you listened to him. He was so genuine and sincere, a big contrast to his usual sarcastic and snarky demeanour. On a day you felt like dying only he could make you feel like living, "I love you. So much."
He smiled ear to ear, feeling his heart swell at your words, "I love you too baby." he handed you one of the snacks he had brought, "Do you wanna eat something? And then you can talk more about what's botherin' you, or we can watch movies, or we can just nap. Whatever you wanna do."
You nodded, taking a bite of the snack, "That sounds good." Angel shifted on the bed so he was beside you again, one arm around your shoulders, while the other wiped your remaining tears.
#fanfiction#froggywritesstuff#anon#ask#male reader#x reader#angel dust x male reader#hazbin angel dust#angel dust#angel dust x reader#trans reader#angel dust x trans reader#angel dust x trans ftm reader#ftm#trans#trans ftm#gay#mlm#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel angel dust#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel fanfiction#x y/n#x you#fem readers dni
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"Caution on scene where Dennis sho[ws/ots] video footage of him masturbating a dog & [w/t]hen Dennis holds up a Tupperware container."
I've been wondering if the "him" in this sentence does not actually refer to Dennis (could be Cricket or a new character?). Because wouldn't it say, "..video footage of him masturbating a dog & [w/t]hen HE holds up a Tupperware container." Idk I feel like it's phrased a bit weirdly. But maybe I'm clutching ar straws because I'm struggling to envision a situation in which Dennis would willingly do that (and film it??). He doesn't even like dogs! 😂
I definitely went there as well!
The grammar being wrong really hinges on if it says “when” or “then”. I initially thought it said then, which means it would be strange to repeat Dennis as the subject of a continuing sentence, but if it says “when”, it’s indicative of this being two different shots, hence the re-establishment of Dennis would make sense. (i.e. Page 26 has two scenes, this is a warning of Dennis in scene X where he does the dog, and Dennis in scene Y where he shows the Tupperware container.) If it is one scene, though, stating Dennis twice is odd.
In either case, I think the real ability to interpret this from a grammatical stand point comes down to me (and probably everyone here?) being completely unfamiliar with how FX gives their Practices & Standards Notes to Rob for Sunny...
If the volume of notes is so great that they break it down related to each character (Frank, for example, cos this seems like something they’d soo put Danny through), it would make sense that they’d only name a character who is not the subject of the note. So maybe the heading says “Frank” and then goes by page for each action and warning, using the pronoun to refer to the main subject and naming the other characters in the scene…
But.. are there a ton of notes for Sunny? I mean, you’d maybe think so based on the content of the show, but this is FX, you can do way more here than you can on network TV so they’d likely be subject to fewer notes. In which case it would just be points from the script, by page broadly, and the pronoun “he” would really have to refer to Dennis in a stand-alone paragraph.
So while the grammar does strike me as possibly indicative of greater missing context, it really might just be the result of Sunny being on FX for 20 years now, and communication like this ending up casual and a little rushed. (Like, there’s clearly a missing “the” before the word “scene”, I’m not sure the person writing this even proofread lmfao)
It’s definitely an interesting thread to pull on, though! Dennis does hate dogs pretty consistently. Orchestrating and presenting something like this but not being/refusing to be the one to actually get his hands dirty seems more on-par with his character… but context is definitely gonna be everything here.
And I do wanna reiterate how clear Glenn and Charlie have made it to me (and in podcasts recently) that they really do care about the character’s motivations, and in 16 especially forward, they’re prioritising characterisation over slotting their characters into a role for sake of the plot. If something seems so blatantly out of character, I have faith the context will make it make sense. It’s Sunny, so maybe it will be gross and abhorrent, but it really won’t be out of character.
#iasip#ask#lucky 17#good thoughts#love to see other ppl thinking this deeply about it#sorry if this is hodgepodge or written poorly#at work… sadant
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task force 141 reacting to [reader] telling them corny jokes during a mission — python333
— — — —
synopsis just as the title says, tf141 reacts to you telling them some corny dad jokes during a mission!
relationships platonic!taskforce 141 & gn!reader.
characters cap. price, soap, ghost, gaz.
warnings 2nd person pov [you/yours/yourself], usage of c/n [code name/call sign], bad jokes.
note ME AND MY 23 FOLLOWERS ARE STRAIGHT CHILLING RN. i love all of u. anyway gaz is in this one!! yippee!! i thought about ghost and his jokes in that one part of one of the cod games idk ive never played them i watch other people play it but you guys know what im talking about. i also just figured out that i should probably specify gender neutral reader for my fics?? so i'll start doing that! ANYWAY enjoy!! this is all fluff and has some classic tired parent & hyper toddler energy in the first part :}
JOHN “BRAVO SIX” PRICE
➥ insert exasperated sigh here.
➥ he will let you keep telling him jokes, however he will only respond to them with a simple, tired, “Uh huh. Good one. Very funny. Nice one.”
➥ tired dad energy.
➥ the first one you told was okay. he laughed at that one. the tenth one? please, god, just stop talking and put him out of his misery.
➥ he wonders how you know so many jokes, and then wonders if you got them all from ghost.
➥ if you did get them from ghost, trust that he will be telling the man himself all about how you constantly told him bad jokes over comms.
➥ if you just happen to know all of these, he won’t be surprised.
➥ he’ll put up with all of the jokes, for your sake, of course.
➥ the first time this happens, you’re both on a pretty insignificant mission compared to other ones you’ve done.
➥ you’re both talking over comms, just making sure you’re both okay.
➥ that’s when you started your attack.
—
“Captain?” You’d asked, listening as Price hummed in acknowledgment of you talking, “Wanna hear a joke?”
You could practically hear his hesitation, before he responded with a tentative, almost scared, “... Sure, [c/n].”
A delighted grin split across your face as you asked him, “How does dry skin affect you at work?”
He thought for a moment before asking, “How?”
“You don’t have any elbow grease to put into it.” You heard Price give a small chuckle, and decided to ask, “Wanna hear another one?”
Price’s second mistake of the evening, “Sure.”
“Where do boats go when they’re sick?” You asked, still keeping a lookout on your surroundings on your end while focusing on telling your Captain shitty jokes.
“Where?” Price asked.
“To the boat doc.” It took Price a moment, before he huffed out a small laugh and muttered just loud enough for you to hear, “Jesus, that’s terrible.”
Without warning, you tell him another one. He asks why, when, how, or what, whichever was appropriate for the joke you told, and slowly but surely his questioning tone became tired and exasperated. You don’t know why, but somehow his miserable tone made you even more motivated to tell him corny jokes.
“Do you just… memorize all of these?” Price asked in the middle of you telling a new joke, sounding almost astonished.
“Yes I do. Just for these missions, I do,” You answered confidently, smiling when Price sighed. You continued on with your joke, and even though Price didn’t respond verbally, you still told the punch line. You had repeated this for at least ten minutes, all of those minutes appallingly slow to Price, the poor man having to endure your bullshit for such a short yet such a long time. At the tenth minute, the only thing that stopped you from continuing was Gaz’s voice coming on over comms and interrupting you, telling everyone else on the mission that they could head back to the rendezvous point. Price, relieved at the interruption, gave a thankful sigh and you could hear him getting up from his spot before he muted himself.
You sighed as well, yours a direct opposite of Prices, full of disappointment, but you let it go. Besides, you’ll always have more opportunities to terrorize Price with your jokes on the ride back to base!
—
JOHN “SOAP” MACTAVISH
➥ he has the same reaction he had with ghost telling him corny jokes.
➥ he’ll call your jokes terrible, but will still laugh at them somehow.
➥ will 100% put up with your jokes, will laugh every time, even if his laughter slowly becomes more and more strained, he’ll laugh.
➥ tells you some jokes back, but after your 4th joke, he gives up and accepts his fate.
➥ he will suffer for your entertainment, guaranteed.
➥ he will be sure to remind you of how terrible your jokes are though!!
➥ he’s honestly impressed by how many jokes you’ve memorized.
➥ he’ll happily support you doing this to other people, no matter how much it damages his soul when you do it to him.
➥ the first time you do it to him, he starts getting deja vu from when ghost did it to him.
➥ “Oh, God, no’ ye too,” he’d groan playfully the moment you start telling him jokes, getting flashbacks.
➥ enjoys your jokes, even if he would do anything for you to shut up, he still enjoys them.
—
You and Soap were camping out in the same spot—atop a roof of a tall building that was just tall enough to give you a view of practically every other building in the area as well as the ground. It was cold up there, the air so cold that every time you’d exhaled, your breath turned to white condensation before fading into the clear sky.
It was fair to say that you and Soap were fairly bothered by the cold, so you really had no other option, you just had to start telling your jokes. How else could you warm the both of you up? Sure, it wouldn’t do anything physically, but mentally? It was sure to practically melt Soap’s brain.
“Soap?” Soap hummed and looked over at you, “Wanna hear a joke?”
Soap smiled, and decided to humor you, “Sure. Joke ‘way.”
“Why couldn’t the bike stand up by itself?” You asked, turning fully towards Soap. He didn’t bother to think before asking, “Why?”
“Because it was two-tired.” It took him a moment, but eventually he huffed out a small laugh and nodded.
“No’ bad,” He’d hummed, “Want me to say one?”
“Go ahead.”
“How did vikings communicate with one another?” Soap asked, turning fully towards you in turn.
“How?”
“By Norse code,” Soap had said with a grin on his face, clearly proud of the joke. You laughed quietly at it.
Without asking, you tell another joke. “Why did the bed wear a disguise?”
“Why?”
“It was undercover.”
Soap chuckled and turned back down to the ground, assuming you were done. But, oh boy, did he assume wrong. You told another one. He asked for the punchline. You delivered. You told another. He asked again. You delivered, again. Can you recall just how many jokes you told that fateful night? No. Does that make the memory any less funny to look back on? No.
Soap’s expression slowly turned to one of misery, his laughter becoming strained and slowly coming to a stop, the light in his eyes fading away as God himself seemed to appear behind you and reassure him that it would all be over soon. God, how he wished that were true.
Soon enough, you were both told over comms that you were able to safely make it back to the rendezvous point, and Soap couldn’t be happier.
He let you tell him more jokes during the walk over there, of course, and made sure to tell you how awful they were, but still endured them for your sake.
—
SIMON “GHOST” RILEY
➥ it’s like he’s been preparing for this moment his whole life.
➥ he’ll put up with your jokes and will tell you a joke back every single time.
➥ at some point you guys will probably use a joke on each other that the other one told you.
➥ he actively enjoys the joke-telling.
➥ he probably tells the first joke and that’s what triggers you to tell him your own.
➥ he’s annoyed soap, gaz, price, and a few others with his jokes, yet you’re the first one to go back and forth with him.
➥ every time you tell him one he’ll make a mental note of it and remember it for annoying people on future missions.
➥ probably thinks some of the jokes are genuinely funny but still knows that it annoys people.
➥ if you tell him a corny joke related to ghosts, he’ll probably laugh more.
➥ i am aware that that is pretty corny in itself but look at the title man what did you expect.
➥ he’ll probably tell some jokes about your [c/n] to you back.
➥ he’ll know when you’re reusing a joke and calls you out on it.
➥ “Does this require more creativity than you expected, [c/n]?”
➥ [in a perfect imitation of matpat’s voice] i find his jokes delightful! [in regular voice, now whispering as if scared i’m going to get caught by ghost saying this] i’m lying. he’s my fictional father figure so i am very much obligated to enjoy his jokes.
—
”[c/n], how copy?” You heard Ghost’s voice crackle through over comms, and pushed the PTT button on your small ear piece to respond.
“Copy, doing just fine,” You responded, “Little bored, if I’m gonna be honest.”
“Oh really?” Ghost breathed out, sounding amused. You could hear some gunfire on his end, and the wind his his earpiece making the annoying whoosh noise you hated. Just a few moments later, Ghost spoke up again, “Y’wanna hear a joke to ease your boredom?”
“Sure,” You’d hummed, looking around to make sure you were still safe to just stay where you were and chat for a moment.
“What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?” Ghost asked, his voice dry and sarcastic. You thought for a moment before shrugging—even though he couldn’t see you—and asking, “What?”
“A stick.” Ghost delivered. The stupid joke made you huff out a small laugh and mutter under your breath something about how good it was, and even though you couldn’t see him, you could practically hear Ghost’s self-satisfied smile.
“Another?” Ghost offered.
“How about I tell one?”
“Alright. Go ‘head.”
“How do ghosts stay in shape?” You asked, listening to Ghost’s amused huff on the other end of the line, like he knew where you were going with the joke but decided not to say the punch line for you.
“How?”
“They exorcize,” You responded, grinning, proud of yourself for thinking of that one.
“That’s not bad,” Ghost hummed, “Not bad at all.”
Ghost stayed quiet for another moment before asking, “Where do fish keep their money?”
“Where?”
“In a river bank,” Ghost said, his smile almost audible in his words.
“Nice one, L.t,” You breathed out, laughing quietly.
“We could do this all night,” Ghost mused, oddly happy at the sound of your quiet laughter, a little rustling audible on his end.
“Is that a challenge?” You asked in response to his musings, to which Ghost responds with a simple, affirmative hum. You think for a moment, before asking, “Why can’t a leopard hide?”
“Why?”
“Because he’s always spotted.”
Ghost hummed, mentally writing that one down before asking, “Why did the scarecrow get an award?”
“Why?”
“Because he was outstanding in his field,” Ghost delivered. With each joke you cringed more, and yet you kept responding with the same bullshit. The two of you went back and forth with the shitty jokes, eliciting responses from each other like, “That’s a good one,” or, “God, that’s awful.” It really had no in between, it was one or the other.
Eventually, and just in time because you were beginning to run out of jokes, Price’s voice crackled through over comms, letting you both know that everything was now under control and gave you both the coordinates for the rendezvous point. Before you get up from your spot, you can hear Ghost asking Price, “Wanna hear a joke?”, and Price’s quick response of, “I’m good”, the quick interaction making you laugh quietly.
“He doesn’t know what he’s missing out on,” You muttered, voice full of amusement.
“Damn right he doesn’t,” Ghost huffed out, chuckling quietly when Price groaned and muted himself.
—
KYLE “GAZ” GARRICK
➥ he just gives up and accepts his fate.
➥ i’m actually in full belief that he’ll just let you tell jokes and won’t even respond.
➥ if y’all are in the same spot, he’ll just stare at you in astonished silence, wondering how you know all of this and also wondering if he’ll make it out of this alive.
➥ i think he’s lovely, i also think that he would just let you do whatever.
➥ it’s like an older brother participating in his younger sibling’s tea party with their stuffed animals and bright pink plastic tea cups and fake tea.
➥ he considers taking out his earpiece but then realizes that that’s a bad idea so he just suffers through it.
➥ surprisingly, it’s easy to focus on his tasks even with your voice in the background.
➥ he’s only heard of ghost’s shitty jokes, and thinks that this might be worse, somehow.
➥ i mean, it’s not like he can’t ignore it, but he feels kind of bad that he does.
➥ he hums every now and then to remind you that he’s listening but he’s too caught up in pretending to listen to actually listen.
➥ when the mission’s over and you eventually stop telling your jokes he realizes how quiet it is without your voice in the background laughing at your own jokes.
—
“Why do bees have sticky hair?” You asked, this being about your twentieth joke of that evening. Gaz hummed in response, tone questioning, and you delivered the punch line, “Because they use a honeycomb.”
Gaz didn’t pay much attention to any of your punchlines, really just letting you get all of this out of your system, figuring that if you didn’t do it now it’d happen to some poor soul later. He accepted his fate early on, the moment you told your third dad joke, he knew it wouldn’t end. Call it a sixth sense of his, knowing when you’d be persistent in your quest to annoy every member of the 141, but he just knew.
“Where do surfers learn to surf?” You asked, giggling quietly at your own joke, despite the punchline being stupid. Gaz didn’t even respond, yet you still delivered, “At boarding school.”
Gaz considers taking his earpiece out for a moment, then thinks again and decides it’s probably better not to, knowing Price’s voice could crackle through into the earpiece and let you both know to head to the rendezvous point. Sighing quietly, he continued to look around him, scanning the area as he walked around, making sure no enemies were left alive. Your voice still hummed in the background, the sound becoming more normal to him and less distracting.
“Why did the tourists feel disappointed after seeing the Liberty Bell?” No response from Gaz. “Because it wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.”
“What do rabbits need after getting caught in the rain?” A small, questioning hum. “A hare dryer.”
You continued to tell your jokes, and in the middle of one, Gaz interrupted.
“Y’know,” He started, “If you didn’t already have a call sign, we’d be calling you Jester.”
“I’d love to go by Jester,” You laughed quietly, lightly, “I feel like it’d be more fitting.”
“Probably, yeah,” Gaz chuckled quietly, about to say something else before Price’s voice came through over comms and let you both know to head over to the rendezvous point. After you stop telling your jokes and mute yourself, Gaz can’t help but notice how quiet it becomes.
He got a bit too used to your voice, it seems. He muted himself and sighed, pulling up the coordinates to the rendezvous point and heading over there.
#yippee#this took me longer to write than i expected tbh#i procrastinated so hard but we r still here!! still posting daily!!#hey guys whats up its ya boy back at it again#ew i hate myself#anyway#cod#cod hcs#hcs#task force 141#tf141#task force 141 x reader#platonic task force 141 x reader#platonic taskforce141#captain john price#john soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#kyle gaz garrick#i think thats good#still trying to remember every tag ive ever used on here
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What if a teen reader ACCIDENTALLY came out to the TF2 mercenaries? "came out" meaning generally queer in sexuality. the teen would be worried and anxious afterward because they don't want the mercs to hate them for it. (this is based on myself as a girl-loving girl but it can be written for any gender)
you ask, you finally receive. Might start cutting requests down. idk, I feel like writing for some reason. Who knows how long that's gonna last, though.
also, REQUESTS ARE OPEN, just be aware that i might not get it out for a long, long time because motivation works weirdly😇
Mercs with a queer reader (PART 1)
Scout, Engineer, Medic
Warnings : fear of being rejected, swearing, a couple of hcs, medic is his own warning
Being queer is hard. And being able to not tell anyone (if you're like me and wanna live comfortably) is hard too.
The way they find out is if you got really cosy with them, and I'm talking being invited to Engie's barbecues, Spy letting you smoke one of his fancy ass cigars, and Scout tossing balls to you and acting like an older brother towards you kind of cosy.
So, one day, you accidentally let it slip during a conversation at dinner, having gotten way too comfortable.
Everyone except Medic and Spy was there, choosing to skip to do "work" instead. Your words quieted the whole damn room.
Whatever you did next is up to you. Whether you took it on proudly and kept eating or walked off to your bedroom to cry, up to you.
Reactions
Scout
Scout's unfamiliar with queer people. He didn't know any, and he wasn't taught anything about them.
He is especially unfamiliar with queer men. If you are a queer man, he'd be asking you all the time when he first finds out:
"How don't you find her hot? Or her? Do you find 'dat asshole, Spy hot? Is 'dat how dis works???"
Not with the intention of being slightly offensive, though. Just curious because he kind of struggles to wrap his head around the fact you're queer.
He always had a feeling that you weren't straight as a line, though. He hung around you a lot, even if you were annoyed by him, because he kind of wanted to finally be an older brother because he's always been the youngest.
So this is all a learning experience for him.
He'd definitely stay quiet for a little while, scaring you, before he randomly approaches you the next day.
"So... you like, what... in ta' ladies/dudes?"
(If you like girls, he'd definitely be the guy to say, "Holy shit, me too!" As a way to bond)
"Yeah."
"That's cool... that's cool... wanna talk about it more, or do you wanna go play ball?"
"Play ball."
"Let's go play ball, 'den."
Nothing changes about your relationship. Although he does occasionally ask if someone is your type or not, wanting to learn more about you. But in the end, as long as you still wanna hang around with him, he'll be chill.
Engineer
Unlike Scout, he is educated in queer people. He knows a couple, and he thinks they're pretty cool. Medic is also out to him because he's definitely gay (and trans because I like it that way)
Absolutely nothing changes with Engineer. He doesn't treat you any different or ask you any questions, just continues as normal, but encourages you to talk to him about things because he's definitely experienced it himself.
"You know, you could'a told me that earlier. I wouldn't have judged ya'. I've roamed around that area myself a little too."
"YOU WHAT?!?"
He just likes to get out there and try random shit. He looks like a boring guy, but he's way deeper than the southern merc on the surface.
Just talk to him :(
Medic
He wasn't there when you accidentally came out. He was finishing up an experiment on some organs.
When someone does tell him about it, though, he can't care less because he's queer too.
He also transed his gender. It's not my problem, it's yours now.
Definitely did his own top surgery ngl. Madman. Also discovered how to extract testosterone from sources and synthetically make it. Officially, a pioneer in trans healthcare. Hit him up if you want sum.
He treats you normally because he really doesn't give a fuck. He basically comes out to you as well, though:
"So you don't care."
"Nope."
"Why...?"
"What do you think Heavy and I do while we are working together... and the rest of you are eating?"
"..."
"Wait a minute... wait a... oh."
"Ja."
"HOW ARE STILL ALIVE?! 😭"
Definitely in love with his unofficial soul mate, the Heavy weapons guy.
I'm gonna do parts to this, actually. I'll make a part 2 and a part 3 another day that is even more random. I just need a break cause this is just a little bit lengthy. Ty got reading and sorry if it isn't exactly what you wanted 💀. I focused it a lot on the mercs instead of readers' anxiety.
Also, if you don't agree with my medic hcs, lol, fair enough 🥺
#tf2#team fortress two#tf2 fanfiction#tf2 and reader#tf2 x reader#team fortress two x reader#tf2 medic#tf2 scout#tf2 engineer#platonic#platonic x reader#platonic tf2#queer#gay#transgender#lesbian#bisexual#trans medic#gay tf2
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