#idk idk idk. it sucks it sucks it sucks though! like im just in such a haze. make it stop
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How I Think The L&Ds Men Would Fart ?!
note: yall this has been on my mind for SO long and its so funny to me omg?!! pls dont JUDGE ME....🫶
Xavier:
THE FART PRINCE 😕
I think his farts would be silent but deadly period
Like sometimes when fighting off wanderers he doesnt even need to put full power into obliterating the wanderer...he can just let a lil gas out and its done for😭
I honestly think he also wouldn't really fart around you but if he did he might be a lil embarassed but I think he wont care after that and he'd be more comfortable
Please avoid him when he sleeps!! Thats when his gas comes out too!!!!! Cover his ass with a blanket!!!
One time you walked into a room he was previously in and you ran out QUICK
Claims that the smell was just his "natural air freshener"🙄
Yeah well it killed a plant in the room.
Idc idc idc but ik this mf probably lactose intolerant ...atleast a lil bit
HELP IDK WHY BUT I FEEL LIKE HE STANDS LIKE BABIES WHEN THEYRE FARTING
LIKE HE JUST STANDS THERE LOOKING GUILTY TRYING TO GET IT OUT😭😭😭😭
Yeah if u see him do that run away 🤍🤍🤍🫶
Zayne:
This decadent delicious man...
I think his farts are average in smell and sound😊
He probably wouldn't fart around you most of the time
I feel like he mastered the art of loosening the rectum just enough for the fart to be silent
Because sometimes...he just has to let it out man!!!😤
Btw hes the type to encourage you to fart infront of him because its healthy to do so
His chair at akso hospital has seen alot...
Btw whenever he eats candy (specifically hard candies that require for u to suck on it),
He would fart more that day bcz of the excess air hes bringing in😭 be careful
I feel like he would also have alot of stomach pain idk why
I can just imagine it...poor him😕!
Pls rub his stomach itll probably help♡
Ngl hes the type to try different positions for farting to see which one will relieve him better
While hes by himself ofc
That would be a sight to see...
If u ever see him do it dont tell him u saw 💚💚
Rafayel:
This mf...sigh
Oh hes crazy. Oh the smell oh the sound
Xavier has some competition...
Sounds straight out of a comedy movie or something
Bro what the hell is wrong w his butt and digestive system???😭🤔🤔
I feel like at first he would REFUSE to fart while youre around him
But as time goes by...he realizes he can use it to threaten u with his fart to get what he wants Like
"Hey dear bodyguard, can you please accompany me at the exhibition today"
"No sorry im-"
"Oh I feel something brewing..."
"NO PLS"
I ALSO FEEL LIKE HE CAN SOMEHOW CONTROL THE SMELL AND SOUND😭😭
When hes feeling a little evil...if he sees a large crowd at one of his art works
He would silently walk behind them and let out a very silent death odor
And then he would watch the visitors from far, FIGHTING AND ARGUING AND BEING LIKE "WHO DID THAT."
Sylus:
😕...
This man.
Has CRAZY FARTS
I feel like the sound would be way worse than the smell though ngl
Very loud⚠️⚠️
Sometimes it equally does smell bad though...Xavier and Rafayel have some competition
This man eats very rich foods so !... very. Filling foods.
He drinks alchohol and alot of that digests oddly/is carbonated/fermented
So hes VERY much getting alot of air
I think he farts the most frequently out of the other 3 boyz 😱😱😱😱😱😱
Also the type to lift up a leg while doing it...😒
I dont think he'd be scared to do it around you but he would prefer not to
Why? So you dont get surprised by the volume
If you sleep next to him he has to clench his cheeks HARD so he doesnt wake u up🤪
Bro you'd think it was a nightmare or someone broke into your house.
EXTRA:
• One time Rafayel was swimming in the ocean and he farted next to a crab. (It passed out) (The crab's family immediately came and tried to pinch Rafayel but were repelled by the smell so they ran away)
• Xavier once saw a skunk and decided to assert dominance by farting next to it. The skunk ran away and hit its head in a tree in the process😆
• Zayne once farted right when his patient entered the room and he was red the entire time and when the patient said "Whats that smell", Zayne's response was "The air ventilation system is getting old." 😭
• One time Sylus was sitting on his couch with Mephisto on the couch next to him, and he farted, and Mephisto slid and fell off the couch because of the vibration + he got broken😒
#loveanddeepspace#l&ds#lads#love and deepspace#lnds xavier#l&ds xavier#love and deepspace xavier#lads xavier#xavier love and deepspace#xavier lads#zayne lads#love and deepspace zayne#l&ds zayne#lads zayne#zayne l&ds#zayne love and deepspace#zayne lnds#lnds rafayel#l&ds rafayel#lads rafayel#love and deepspace rafayel#rafayel love and deepspace#rafayel#l&ds sylus#sylus lnd#sylus love and deepspace#lnds sylus#sylus#sylus lads#sylus l&ds
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oh my lord don't get me STARTED.
i cannot emphasize how hard i agree with this just generally speaking. ik this was mentioned, but something that just doesn't sit with me is that silver fox's character served to be something tragic for logan rather than with the intial intention to be built into her own character in any proper way. her trauma is inevitably treated as his, which is an issue alone without the racism being involved.
i'd like to add on that i feel this is an issue with rape culture in media, especially comics, in general. i hardly see any discussion on the topic even though it runs rampant in comics and often has this weird undertone of "this is here because this is one of the worst evils a man can do" while written by men.. usually poorly, at that. the implications alone disturb me tbh. it's tossed around almost as flippantly as a character trope and is either used for some level of shock value or just won't be taken seriously by any means.
additionally marvel has an overall issue with writing sabretooth as a character. there's no limit set for him and it can honestly make it seem like their writers just don't fully understand what they're doing..? is he the most disgusting, irredeemable man to walk or is he someone to hold sympathy and care for? sometimes it feels like the writing is very black and white... the fandom is, unfortunately, not much better. i'm not asking that sabretooth be a charity-donating saint who hands out hand-written cursive apologies to those he so much as bumps into. but at what point do we draw the line? why should i have any sympathy for a character who does just vile evils without reason? it becomes entirely pointless eventually.
if you need to resort to just throwing in SA needlessly into your story in order to write a "beastly" character, you are bad at writing. and if you are someone who feels the need to defend this concept or claim to not feel a particularly strong way about it, i feel like you aren't equipped to try and involve yourself in the first place, and that you need to stay in your lane; i see an unnecessary amount of people who will throw up their hands and go "w-w-well um!! EVIL characters do EVIL things!! heh.. you're just too sensitive... heh.." instead of thinking for literally two seconds about why someone might not like the way a topic is handled.
i don't think this is an untouchable topic to be portrayed in comics, but it'd be a blatant lie to pretend that marvel has a credible history of tackling this with care.
marvel, i think, to some degree understands that this treatment towards silver fox and her portrayals [bonus points for when she falls under the "exotic native girl" stereotype.. gags.] are, ofc and obv, not. good. why else would they repeatedly either not mention it, brush it under the rug, or even retcon it? i honestly just wish they had the capability of being direct with addressing this sort of stuff.
you should not need to have your hand held to understand why this concept as a whole, especially for characters like silver fox, is in poor taste.
im so anti “sabretooth is a sexual predator” for so many reasons.
mainly tho? is that the inciting incident for this part of his personality is such a typical stereotyped instance of trauma against an INDIGENOUS WOMAN. murdering her is bad enough, but at least that contributes to the narrative and fits his murderous behavior. adding on that he assaulted her dead body is just so unnecessary. indigenous people don’t exist to be assaulted for your entertainment, especially when that addition to the narrative wouldn’t even change the outcome of the story.
#sorry if i sorta derailed or worded this weird as it is. 3am and i got off of work roughly 3 hours ago. i slow blink.#but yeah oh my god i think of this all the time.#i feel like even as someone who isn't indigionous i was able to understand how fucked silver fox's role in sabes + logan's story is;#that's not to say i totally understand#-as an issue. sweatier n grosser fans will even pride themselves on liking sabes for this reason bc he's “ACTUALLY evil” or whatev n like??#like “indigionous girl is brutalized + SA'd by a white man but we're just gonna treat it as some white dude's trauma bc he's the main focus#that's.. exactly what it is. you have to be dense to read that and not understand how gross it is imo#again if you need to just resort to SA or some shit you suck at writing and if you feed into that bs youre a media illiterate moron.#but that's a hot take i guess.#sigh idk. im rlly glad to see someone else talking abt this though ugh.#i genuinely can't imagine what these bitches were thinking when they wrote this bc it's obviously purposeful imo. just. what the fuck man.#anyways#{ REBLOG }#{ FAVE }#{ YAPFEST }#xmen#sabretooth
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Hello EriKar nation
#karkat vantas#eridan ampora#homestuck#hellop art#eridan#erikar#karkat#pogz art#eridan ampora x karkat vantas#eridanxkarkat#hs#remaking nasty dog hopefully i can finish it soon#probably not but i have like#3 frames done already#out of like#idk 7-10#to lazy to add lipsync this time around though#so mb guys#also schoolstuck will probably take a bit#i havent forgotten#just need ideas#if u have any ideas lmk#though ik u guys wont lmk but still its fun to ask ig#also I was relooking at Eridana pesterlogs while making this and theyre interesting#i could do a whole Eridan Ampora rant about how he doesnt suck as bad as everyone says he does#but I probably wont cuz im trying to stay out of drama and nobody gaf anyways#sorry for the rant again guys
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green beetle black beetle
#star wars#the original trilogy#boba fett#darth vader#hi. sorry for star war jumpscare. genuinely#i feel like ive kinda been on an art hiatus lately due to health stuff#i got diagnosed with a parathyroid disease recently (wahoo) so now i know why i have been feeling so bad! need more tests though#anyway. in the mean time most of the entertainment my brain can handle has been like. youtube clip compilations of shows and movies#not even the actual shows or movies. literally just sections of them on youtube#i wish i was joking#the only reason i know what happens in succession is because i have watched it in disjointed order in youtube compilations. not joking#anyway so ive learned a lot more about star wars than i ever. thought i would#mostly just the original trilogy and prequels. some of the old comics & books are interesting too#(sick to my stomach) i like darth vader he has like the same personality as ganondorf except he had no good reason for doing anything#when vader/anakin does literally anything weird or unacceptable it like. makes me laugh so hard its like jerma when he sees a car accident#boba fett’s costume design has been rotating in my head a lot too it’s very good#he’s very colorful and like. matte/unpolished compared to vader and it makes them a cool duo visually#those 2 are my favorites. vader why is the space cowboy the only person aside from sidious or tarkin who is allowed to get mad at you#sidious is my 3rd favorite. he sucks so bad as like a person that you just. you have no expectations of him except just being evil#so its just really funny like everything he does is horrible and he’s so happy all the time like good for him#i’m making it sound like ive never seen star wars before. i have i just never really cared about it until i got an endocrine disorder lmao#but yeah idk art may continue to be slow while im figuring out treatment stuff#if anyone reading this also has or has had hyperparathyroidism im wishing the strength & radiance of 1000 beautiful horses upon you
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the shyest creature on earth dreams of art streaming
#i know it sounds like im giving every reason why i SHOULDNT do it but i really wanna learn how to someday#i dont really have the space or privacy for it rn though since i live at home with 3 other ppl plus i have school to focus on ugh#ive been able to stream my art in discord calls but i havent done it in so long and the atmosphere is a little different#not bad different though. its fun to draw ppls conversations out and make shitposts. and i like any kind of attention heh#i also use procreate so its hard to stream frm my ipad but im looking into a lighting adapter to HDMI cable to project on my monitor#part of my urge to start a twitch might also be because i wanna learn how to make and rig a little avatar and use cute frames#and id love to play some ambience music while i draw and just. idk. listen to ppl talk..? but im lacking in audience engagement#since i suck at responding and public speaking and prefer to do things quietly. i just like being observed like im on national geographic#yapping#doodles#sona#puppysona#my art#myart
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actually i'm still thinking about the moral orel finale.
he has a cross on his wall. do you know how much i think about that bc it's a lot.
a lot of stories ((auto)biographical or fictional) centering escape from abusive/fundamentalist christianity result in the lead characters leaving behind christianity entirely. and that makes complete sense! people often grow disillusioned with the associated systems and beliefs, and when it was something used to hurt them or something so inseparable from their abuse that they can't engage with it without hurting, it makes total sense that they would disengage entirely. and sometimes they just figure out that they don't really believe in god/a christian god/etc. a healthy deconstruction process can sometimes look like becoming an atheist or converting to another religion. it's all case by case. (note: i'm sure this happens with other religions as well, i'm just most familiar with christian versions of this phenomenon).
but in orel's case, his faith was one of the few things that actually brought him comfort and joy. he loved god, y'know? genuinely. and he felt loved by god and supported by him when he had no one else. and the abuses he faced were in how the people in his life twisted religion to control others, to run away from themselves, to shield them from others, etc. and often, orel's conflicts with how they acted out christianity come as a direct result of his purer understanding of god/jesus/whatever ("aren't we supposed to be like this/do that?" met with an adult's excuse for their own behavior or the fastest way they could think of to get orel to leave them alone (i.e. orel saying i thought we weren't supposed to lie? and clay saying uhhh it doesn't count if you're lying to yourself)). the little guy played catch with god instead of his dad, like.. his faith was real, and his love was real. and i think it's a good choice to have orel maintain something that was so important to him and such a grounding, comforting force in the midst of. All That Stuff Moralton Was Up To/Put Him Through. being all about jesus was not the problem, in orel's case.
and i know i'm mostly assuming that orel ended up in a healthier, less rigid version of christianity, but i feel like that's something that was hinted at a lot through the series, that that's the direction he'd go. when he meditates during the prayer bee and accepts stephanie's different way to communicate, incorporating elements of buddhism into his faith; when he has his I AM A CHURCH breakdown (removing himself from the institution and realizing he can be like,, the center of his own faith? taking a more individualistic approach? but Truly Going Through It at the same time), his acceptance (...sometimes) of those who are different from him and condemned by the adults of moralton (stephanie (lesbian icon stephanie my beloved), christina (who's like. just a slightly different form of fundie protestant from him), dr chosenberg (the jewish doctor from otherton in holy visage)). his track record on this isn't perfect, but it gets better as orel starts maturing and picking up on what an absolute shitfest moralton is. it's all ways of questioning the things he's been taught, and it makes sense that it would lead to a bigger questioning as he puts those pieces together more. anyway i think part of his growth is weeding out all the lost commandments of his upbringing and focusing on what faith means to him, and what he thinks it should mean. how he wants to see the world and how he wants to treat people and what he thinks is okay and right, and looking to religion for guidance in that, not as like. a way to justify hurting those he's afraid or resentful of, as his role models did.
he's coming to his own conclusions rather than obediently, unquestioningly taking in what others say. but he's still listening to pick out the parts that make sense to him. (edit/note: and it's his compassion and his faith that are the primary motivations for this questioning and revisal process, both of individual cases and, eventually, the final boss that is christianity.) it makes perfect sense as the conclusion to his character arc and it fits the overall approach of the show far better. it's good is what i'm saying.
and i think it's important to show that kind of ending, because that's a pretty common and equally valid result of deconstruction. and i think it cements the show's treatment of christianity as something that's often (and maybe even easily) exploited, but not something inherently bad. something that can be very positive, even. guys he even has a dog he's not afraid of loving anymore. he's not afraid of loving anyone more than jesus and i don't think it's because he loves this dog less than bartholomew (though he was probably far more desperate for healthy affection and companionship when he was younger). i think it's because he figures god would want him to love that dog. he's choosing to believe that god would want him to love and to be happy and to be kind. he's not afraid of loving in the wrong way do you know how cool that is he's taking back control he's taking back something he loves from his abusers im so normal
#i had a really big fundie snark phase a year or two ago so that's part of like. this. but im still not used to actually talking about#religious stuff so if it reads kinda awkwardly uhh forgive me orz idk#maybe it sounds dumb but i like that the message isn't 'religion is evil'. it easily could have been. but i think the show's points about#how fundie wasp culture in particular treats christianity and itself and others would be less poignant if they were like. and jesus sucks#btw >:] like. this feels more nuanced to me. i guess there's probably a way to maintain that nuance with an ultimately anti-christian#piece of media but i think it'd be like. wayy harder and it's difficult for me to imagine that bc i think a lot of it would bleed out into#the tone. + why focus on only These christians when They're All also bad? so you'd get jokes about them in general#and i think that's kinda less funny than orel and doughy screaming and running from catholics lsdkjfldksj#i think the specificity makes it more unique and compelling as comedy and as commentary. but that's just me#like moralton represents a very particular kind of christian community (namely a middle class fundie wasp nest)#you're not gonna be able to get in the weeds as much if you're laughing at/criticizing all christians. but they accomplish it so thoroughly#and WELL in morel and i think that's because it chose a smaller target it can get to dissect more intimately. anyway#moral orel#orel puppington#(OH also when i say wasp here i mean WASP the acronym. as in white anglo-saxon protestsant. in case the term's new to anyone <3)#maybe it's also relevant to say that i'm kindaaaaaaaa loosely vaguely nonspecifically christian. so there's my bias revealed#i was never raised like orel but i like to think i get some of what's going on in there y'know. in that big autistic head of his#but it's not like i can't handle anti-christian/anti-religious media/takes. i'm a big boy and also i v much get why it's out there yknow#christianity in specific has a lot of blood on its hands from its own members and from outsiders and people have a right to hate it for tha#but religion in all its forms can be positive and i appreciate the nuance. like i've said around 20 times. yeah :) <3#(<- fighting for my life to explain things even though my one job is to be the explainer)
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closing time
#you know situation's dire when sparks breaks out the color block sona vent art LOOOOOOOL#sparks speaks#vent#again to all my new-ish followers i do post stuff like this from time 2 time PLEASE block one of those tags if you don't want to see it#long post#edit: fine to rb idgas#ummm NEway. i go back to college in like a month and the thought of it makes me want to curl up and die. idk if i can do it again tbh lol#i dont know how i survived the first time#<- LYING he does. and it was by letting the dissociation he is currently bitching about swallow him completely#if i really committed and tried i could probably claw my way out of this. but there's really no point when i'll just fall back into it soon#the forgetting my entire life does suck though. it does suck.#its really cool learning you've lost the only thing you thought you couldn't lose.#anyways. i'm fine im chillin i just. needed to get this out#if youre reading this preciate you. drink water
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some ultrakill doodles from the past few months ^_^
#ultrakill#pan doodles#these r not going in the art tag actually its crazy that im posting them at all. but im like strange in the brain rn so u have to see them#alright first up is based off a fucked up screenshot my buddy took in gmod.#second up is a series of me killing time#third up is v1 v2 racecar bed sleepover. imagine that they have little night caps and a saucer with a candle on it. snoork mimimi#last one is whatever the fuck i just go here idk. based off me misreading my mutuals icon as v1 even though its not#ok. my final message. goot bye.#SORRY btw that the image quality is sucks i use the pixel tool in firealpaca to doodle and tumblr crunches the shite out of it
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okay fine i'll read homestuck. whatever. i've cracked i can't take it anymore i need to fuck around and find out.
#🐉#james reads homestuck#btw i know some people have legitimate objections to it so im fully prepared for that#and im not going to be an idiot and just try to ignore that and bury my head in the sand#but im curious as hell and even if some of it sucks i want to understand why#its such a compelling and beloved story to so many people#and hell i want to actually understand why some of it is Bad (for lack of a better word)#and not just take the word of random internet strangers as objective truth without further investigation#because thats the opposite of using my critical thinking skills#if you think reading media with some shitty stuff in it makes you a Bad Person just by exposure well idk why youre still following me anywa#but yea heres your warning that i will become aware of homestuck if thats something you cant stand#even though the likelihood of me blogging about it is slim#and if i do ill probably like. make a sideblog so people who really dont like it can avoid it.#MAN. okay. sorry for the disclaimer im just worried people are gonna think im an idiot or something and send me condescending asks#or assume the worst about me as a person#because. internet.
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gonna vent for a sec but im so tired of this "don't wanna be an inconvenience", people pleasing shit ngl.....do people who do this know that they just come off as really rude and like... it just feels insulting each time
#idk it's so upsetting and discouraging im really tired of it#like bro.... everyone can see what you're doing and#you doing it just communicates that you think im a fucking awful person#if im going to be fine with like someone... putting themselves down for the sake of others#or denying help because thay dont want to be an inconvenience#it just feels rude#if you don't think that i genuinely want to help you#if you think that I'm just fucking pretending or whatever then why are you even here I don't want#a friend who thinks these thoughts about me xd#like#how many times do i have to assure someone#i just feel like shit#it really just feels so shittyyyyyyy#comeonnnnn#people can SEE you people pleasing and doing all that shit#and everybody fucking hates it#it just makes me super uncomfortable and i know it also makes other ppl i know very uncomfortable also#on one hand I don't wanna mention anything to this person because trauma is trauma what the fuck am i#supposed to do about that its just a trauma response but god i have feelings too#i want that person to also consider me because it feels so awful it just taints every single interaction#because it makes me feel like they think im some awful person who's going to be fine#with them carrying all their stuff even though i offered like 5 times and them just pushing themselves aside so i have space#even though im offering to share#AURGHH#it feels so bad#i feel like this every time i spend time with this person or any other person who does this that i know enough to like#recognize the behavior#idk im just tired I can't be putting all my effort#into reassuring every single step it's just sucking all fun out of everything we do together it just feels like shit whatever
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i'm kind of amazed how most of the stardew marriage candidates just want you to be their manic pixie dream whatever by agreeing with everything they like and plying them with compliments or praise or whatever (which is fine but a bit. Much) but for shane his romance is just you being there for him while he figures his own shit out... dunno why i never wanted to romance him before he's so good
#i'm usually a sebastian kinda guy but i do think it's silly you have to say you like scifi to gain friendship points w him like cmon man#i will say though that. my bestie's baby daddy being named shane kinda does make it hard to like him 😭 unfortunate but not his fault#ik a lot of ppl are weird abt his recovery and his messy ass room bc they play stardew to make things look pretty or whatever#but i'm actually kind of glad he's a realistic depiction of addiction... the problem is his dependence on indulging in alcohol when he's#depressed not the fact that he drinks period... i think that a lot of ppl are unrealistic abt alcoholism (including me abt my dad's)#but concernedape did really good w him imo. anyways all this to say that i'm really glad shane never expects someone to be a certain way#i know most of the candidates are like. archetypes or whatever and i think that's fine they are very sweet and cute regardless but#i think maybe i didnt romance him before bc i related to him so badly that it hurt seeing myself reflected LMAO dead end life and being#suicidal about it like. i've never had a drug dependence but i'm not really in a position where i can ever make my own decisions anyways#but regardless. there is smth to someone who slowly warms up to you when they can't ignore your kindness any longer and have no reason to#act like an abused dog anymore which. does make me sad just to say but that is how he acts beforehand#idkkkkk idk i think people are always too caught up with his addiction and his messy room to actually see him without realizing that#getting better is a lot harder than it appears and that having a dirty room doesn't mean you aren't trying to be better. sigh#besides it's not like. the end of the world that he has a beer sometimes. have you tried going thru life completely sober? it sucks#ok im done LMAO but yeah i've found myself gravitating towards him this time around when i've romanced sebastian literally every playthru#til now. hmm!#ACTUALLY ONE MORE THING. i like how he's basically a twist on the classic useless husband trope in media where they love sports and drinking#but he's not a bad person and the only reason he's mean to you at first is because he hates himself and his own life and he makes an effort#the more you get close to him instead of the opposite. i like that a lot. ok now i'm done
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I like making iverelle a total loser. I like going “yeah without her echo she kinda sucks at everything.” I like making her self esteem and ego issues correct. I love making everything she’s insecure about true. Holding this elf up by her scruff and going “I think you’re lame and that’s why I love you.”
#honestly though it’s hard to think Iverelle’s good at fighting like. at all.#without the echo she’s just. nooooot a fighter. at all.#she’s not intelligent enough to be some great magic user. she’s not strong enough to fight melee well.#I wanna give her some talent she’s good at but at the same time I don’t wanna be ‘oh heehoo look how special she is’#so she’s just kinda. mediocre except her echo. she sucks. she’s lame. I love her.#though I mean. truth be told. the fact she sucks won’t stop her from throwing herself at any problem to try and help others.#if she wasn’t the WoL she’d still be using herself as a meat shield#sighs. slaps her head. she’s lame AND tupid…….#idk maybe I’ll find something she’s good at so I don’t feel cringe goinf ‘she’s okay at things!!’#oc: iverelle vauvenelle#sorry im being so mean to you queen.
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as much as Bad very much does care for the well being of all the eggs, as much as Leo of course cares for her tio, the fact remains that Roier is her closest family and caretaker right now, and he Does Not Trust Bad. not with the time of day, not with the location of Pepito’s room, certainly not with Leo. and it’s like, after everything that happened in Purgatory, it’s to be expected. it doesn’t matter how much Bad has cared for the eggs, it doesn’t matter how much we as the audience know he’d do everything in his power to keep any one of them safe - the fact remains that his actions have tarnished the trust he’s built with some of the other islanders. it remains to be seen how this’ll come into play with the rest of Red, as they’re still missing, but it’s super obvious with Roier.
I doubt Roier will be on tomorrow to take care of Leo, and I know Bad is planning on giving her cookies and taking care of her. and I’d bet money this’ll be another point of tension against Bad - yes, even though he’s watching out for Leo. I keep coming back around to actions having consequences, but it’s prevalent, and this is one of the many Bad is experiencing - a complete lack of faith and trust from the others because of his actions in Purgatory.
#either that or maybe it’ll get Roier to trust bad a bit more. I kinda doubt it though#it keeps circling back around to purgatory but it’s so prevalent rn with what’s going on and how people treat bad#it’s like. yeah it makes sense Roier would not want bad taking care of Leo. it doesn’t matter that we know bad only cares about her he#doesn’t get that trust anymore. like#it sucks because ofc we know bad has only ever cared about the eggs. and it’s always been known to everyone else#but purgatory still frayed the trust enough to put doubt on that#by Roier at least. etoiles’ level of trust still means he trusts him w the eggs as far as I’ve seen#idk we’ll see what happens we’ll see#im just delighted at purgatory having lasting consequences. drama and intrigue and fraying trust. it’s interesting#and to be clear - I am so glad bad will be there to take care of Leo tomorrow jfjskfkd#mcyt#qsmp#q!roier#q!bbh#z speaks
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i feel shy talking here when i dont have anything worth sharing but i cant help feeling like ive said things in the tags that could be brought up in court
#im joking#i think i just get embarrassed saying smth that most ppl can see out in the open. its like when prey animals are grazing in a pasture#and then they hear a twig snap yk. im like that. but talking in the tags is more comfortable because it just feels more.. hidden?? quiet???#its kind of like how i prefer responding thru asks than DMs.. idk if it has something to do with space or less pressure#i also use these as an excuse to ramble a little abt recent events so. ive worked a little bit on shuffle and prestos backstories ^_^#i was thinking abt giving them a shared past where they knew each other as kids and forgot but i also though hmm.. idk if it would drive th#story i want bc i think itd be better if they bonded over similar experiences instead of the fact that they knew each other before. i get#that reconnecting and reconciling your idea of someone now and then is a good concept but id have to think abt it.. i dont want it to feel#like they owe each other to be friends again just bc they were as kids. ive experienced that a lot and all it did was make me feel guilty#so i think id want to write it as u can be friends with someone who had similar experiences and make u wish you knew each other then#i also know theyd hate each other but idk HOW. i suck at writing conflict so idk if theyd try to make each other eat glass and why#idk if itll ever come up but id also like to see if theres a way i could rationalize why they have animal ears.. normally i say aliens#but ive had an idea for a species and background for that too. although its very abstract and it probably has a lot of holes#smth abt peoples souls attaching themselves to smth they identify with.. although i dont know to what extent like if it can#be called a sona or if it can even be smth mythical like a unicorn or god itself.. its very weird rn#yapping#oc talk
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mhm I just discovered I've been blocked by one of my fave LOTR blogs on tumblr and now I'm crying cuz idk what I did 🥺
#i was wondering why i didnt see the blog on my dash anymore#and now im sad#i think its cuz i publicly said i dont like ROP even though I want everyone in that fandom to feel welcome here too#or maybe I just suck idk#I feel AWFUL#if I have done something to upset anyone with my words please tell me
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so there's a trans woman who goes to the centre and everyone calls her by her birthname which she is like... fine with but only because she has no choice but to be fine about it. anyways I've known her for a while through a trans group before the centre so I asked her today if she'd rather I call her by her birthname or her chosen name and she said she prefers her chosen name but I can call her by her birthname if I want and oh my god I was about to cry for her bc god I really feel that whole situation fjdkdl, I just told her "no I WANT to call you by the name you prefer, that's why I'm asking, I want to make sure it's safe for you if I call you [preferred name]" and she seemed so grateful and I'm just :') eeurrgghh i hate how we have to be grateful with crumbs !!!
its just absolutely wild to me that she's presenting femininely and wears skirts and dresses and everything and uses her preferred name when she writes her name down on stuff and yet everyone at the centre calls her by her birthname and he/him pronouns. like. how are people so fucking rude and oblivious ??? she's even worn a she/her pronoun pin to the centre like.... people are so fucking stupid about trans people I stg.
idk I'm just hoping to make her feel a bit more comfortable and maybe if I start calling her by the right name and pronouns then everyone else will too eventually because I know she doesnt feel safe correcting people. I'm not going to make a big thing of it obviously bc I don't want to put her in danger but I will be using the correct name and pronouns now that I've double-checked with her about it, and if I start feeling like it's making things worse for her then I'll check in with her again at that point. I've honestly been stumbling trying to use he/him for her when I mention her to other ppl because she is just... she/her in my brain. it's what I know she wants to use so it feel fucking awful to use anything else !!!
#and my counselor said smth abt her that rly didnt sit right with me#but i was too scared to challenge her on it and ask what she meant by what she'd said#it might just be that this woman talks too much and will talk my ear off if i let her fjfkdl#and then i wont make friends if i just sit with her every day like i was doing the first couple weeks#but smth abt the way she said smth more like... ''getting sucked into all the stuff [she] has going on''#but said in a more... eugh way#idk it set off transphobia alarm bells in my head. ''ooh man wearing a dress who thinks he's a woman how crazy and perverted'' sort of vibe#I'm just... worried. that my counselor is transphobic lmao. I haven't talked abt any of my gender stuff w her#she can she/her me all she wants lol I don't talk about gender w mental health professionals ever after that initial exp a few yrs ago#I DONT KNOW THOUGH THIS IS JUST RLY MESSING WITH ME#LIKE WHY ARE PEOPLE BEING SO WILLFULLY OBLIVIOUS ???#its really fucking upsetting and I've been trying to not let it get to me too much but jesus fucking christ c'mon people 😭😭😭#im hoping i can maybe help change things for the better bc I'll be someone on her side#since she doesnt seem to have that there. god I've cried abt this a few times bc its just awful#and it rly reminds me a bit of my own situation where i just. grin and bear the misgendering and wrong name#except im a coward compared to her fjdksl i never mention my name or pronouns#i will say though that she has consistently misgendered me no matter how often I've reminded her of my pronouns fjdksl#but like... they/them is difficult. i get that. I can't hold it against her esp bc she's in her like 50s or smth#head in my hands. i wish life were kinder to all of us. i hope one day things can be easier#pippen needs 2nd breakfast#transphobia#transmisogyny#<- for blacklists. i uhhh hope this doesnt turn up in searches but oh well !!!
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