#idk i miss when we would work together and understand each identity as different but also see that there was similarities and overlap

[kayetra-spade-queen]

Lattu Is Not A Good Friend To Ajay

Another day, another yapping session with me-

I've finished my exams, I'm working on Beyburst fic with 7 chapters and chapter 8 is still wip, now I had another topic I want to discuss.

I'm here to explain how and why Lattu isn't exactly a good friend to Ajay.

Beware that these are just me yapping myself away like I always do, backed up by general researching and observations. Please do not take it seriously. If you have opposing opinions, do share them politely.

Lattu Doesn't Treat Ajay All That Well

Ik you might be saying like; "but Kay, they're close and stuck to each other like glue. And they're best friends-" yeah, I get that, and I understand.

But my point is that, the fact that how easily he could forget about Ajay's existence the moment LS disappeared is-

Many, and I do mean, MANY times when some shit went down, everyone panicked, LS came, save the day, everyone happy.

Plenty times where Lattu was with Ajay when shit like this happened, and not once, and I do mean NOT ONCE Lattu ever spoke out that his "best friend" is missing after the day has been saved.

Boy, you sat RIGHT NEXT with an introvert you befriended, who you call a "best friend" at that, too. But the moment your idol appears, he suddenly became air? Are you being fr rn??

Many will argue that Lattu just forgot it as a one time thing- no, it's not a one time thing, it's a constant thing.

And the fact that Lattu blatantly said that after LS, Ajay is his best friend, straight to his (Ajay's) face to at that, like?? Excuse me?? Ajay might've laughed it off, but you can't tell me that he felt hurt, even if LS and Ajay are th same person.

(The video in question)

Imagine if Ajay and LS are completely different people altogether; Ajay would've been more hurt than he was originally. Your own best friend, said that you are second to his idol? Idk about y'all, but if that were me, I would drop that friend immediately, no questions asked. Blocked, distanced, everything. I'm not trying to be mean or anything; I just don't want to stay in a friendship where I wasn't being treated properly.

And treating someone properly is clearly not in Lattu's dictionary, no matter how harsh it might sound.

The Difference Between Lattu And Babli As Ajay's Friends

Listen; I'm not trying to be biased or anything, but I just think that Babli is a much better person as Ajay's best friend.

Like- girlie was the only person in his private life aside from family that know of his dual-life situation, and she supports him and is actually there for him through and through.

Of course, being the daughter of a senior professor might've played a part here a bit, but even if that wasn't the case, she would still be supportive of him no matter what, because she actually cared about him, and being an actual friend to him both as Ajay and LS at the same time.

Through their expeditions together, for Babli, her friend group remains unchanging; Ajay and LS are the same person, so there's no need for her to ask for Ajay to invite him to their little shenanigans with LS. Her best friend is literally already there as is.

Lattu on the other hand, for as much as I know, he never once ever asked Ajay if he would be interested in coming to join their chaos getaway with LS, and he's the person who's unaware of Ajay's dual-identity. He technically treated two people completely differently.

"He might've asked him off-screen". That might be the case, but I will never excuse the fact that Lattu had zero thoughts when it comes to his own best friend in favor of his idol. None.

If Their Friendship Breaks Apart, It's Not Ajay's Fault

I feel like instead of because of how Ajay kept a secret from Lattu, it'll be because Ajay realized he wasn't being treated fairly like a friend when he's being himself, his real self, and Lattu is just too absorbed into his alter-ego than anything.

We have to always remind ourselves that "Little Singham" is not Ajay's real identity; this is explicitly said multiple times already throughout the series. Little Singham is merely an alter-ego that Ajay created due to his work line. The flamboyant and open-energy personality isn't Ajay's actual personality. Ajay has always been the quiet, introverted, and shy kid who is quite invisible in his own class, with only 2 people ever see him, sometimes even 5.

Lattu, basically in a sense, favors Ajay as someone else rather than Ajay's real self, and that's what I think will be the breaking point for Ajay at some point to break away from this relationship; it's no use to be in a relationship where you won't be valued as yourself, and only being valued by only putting up a persona that is anything but yourself.

This might've appeared in an alt universe more than anything lmfao, but my point still stands.

I mean like- Lattu is blind asf dawg; when LS is clearly barefaced, he doesn't realized shit. Suspected Aadi to look familiar, while Baaghi is literally right there not far from them, like hello??

I'm not trying to hate on Lattu, no. He's honestly a good character if he was written right. I just have problems with how he is with his friendship with Ajay, and how bad the relationship is, whether anyone realized this or not.

Then again, they're 9 year old children, I'm not gonna expect them to behave like a teenager when it comes to their relationships, but usually in childhoods, anywhere below 12 at least, friendships are highly valued, and I don't think Lattu is doing a good job on that.

Babli is honestly the most solid friend Ajay could ever had. Cuz not only since they're friends since childhood, they're still close to this day to the point of siblinghood (I'm sure Avishkar took care of him to some extent after Akira left).

That's probably all. If there's more, I'll add later

[prettyboypucey]

Weird ~ G.W.

Summary: George is gorgeous. Charlie is a meddler. The snow is cold. (this summary sucks...just read it) 

Pairing: George Weasley x Y/N 

Word Count: 2,404 (who do I think I am?) 

Warnings: mentions of bullying. mentions of food/eating. george is unknowingly triggering? reader cries. idk? let me know if i missed something. 

A/N: part 2? maybe? translations are for romanian via google translate. do not come for me if they are hella wrong. 

Translations: draga - darling; dragoste - love; tampit - stupid 

     I had never been normal. From the time I was a toddler I had stars in my eyes and dirt on my knees. While the other kids in my grade were playing with dolls and dressing respectably, I was riding imaginary dragons and wearing mismatched socks with dungarees and a butterfly headband. Normalcy evaded me even further when at 11 years old, I got a letter declaring me a witch.

     When I first came to Hogwarts I spent the majority of my time alone. It appeared that even children who could wave a stick around and makes things fly wanted nothing to do with the colorful little girl. Meeting Luna Lovegood in my second year was the best thing that had ever happened to me. Here was a girl who allowed me to be exactly who I was with no judgments. And then she introduced me to Neville Longbottom and Ginny Weasley, and suddenly that little girl who thought her only friends would always be the rocks she painted faces on, had found her people.

     Of course, being friends with Ginny Weasley meant knowing her many brothers. So after graduation when I went off to Romania to work with dragons it made me feel slightly better knowing Charlie Weasley would be there. He quickly took me under his wing and became the older brother figure I had never had. After working together for three years, and electing to stay at the sanctuary for the last two over the holidays, he had finally convinced me to come home with him. I was reluctant to leave the sanctuary - the one place I truly feel safe (despite the massive fire breathing creatures).

     Charlie had warned me that being with one or two of the Weasleys was very different from being with the entire Weasley clan. Obviously I knew Charlie and Ginny, Ron had always been nice to me, and I had met Molly a handful of times in passing. However, Bill was known to be quite intimidating, Percy was supposedly very no-nonsense, and the twins (albeit never cruel) had a reputation of being hell-raisers.

     Apparating to the edge of a marsh with Charlie by my side I could see the rising structure haphazardly balanced slightly ahead.

     Pausing, I glanced at the back of the familiar red covered head, “I don’t know Charles, maybe I should just go back. I really don’t want to be a burden.”

     Charlie very quickly rounded behind me to continue guiding me towards his home, “No, no, no, no, no. No. You’re not a burden to anyone draga. Keep your head up and if any of them give you grief - remind them of the giant, winged beasts you can feed them to.”

     Quickly placing a kiss to the side of my head Charlie bounded ahead again to open the door and announce your arrival. Before I could toe off the first boot to leave next to the dozen other pairs in the entryway, a pair of arms had flung around my neck.

     “Y/N! I missed you so much!”, Ginny pulled back, keeping her grip on my shoulders, to inspect for any major injuries.

     I held onto her elbows, keeping her close, “Hi Gin, I missed you too. A lot. I’m loving this new look by the way.”

     She reached up to brush the now short locks behind her ears. A grin on her face as the two of us looked the other over for the first time in months. Ginny was wrapped in a pretty baby pink sweater with shades of red and white running through it. The material was soft against my palm as I hooked it around her crooked elbow to follow her into the living area.

     “You know”, she started, “I was starting to think maybe Charlie had let you get eaten or burnt to a crisp in the land of dragons. It’s been so long since you’ve come to see me or left the sanctuary.”

     “I’m sorry Ginny. It’s just that after everything, I had to keep myself busy.”

     Ginny’s smile softened into one of understanding. The war had taken a part of all of us. Although Fred had recovered after many months, that fear of almost losing such a vital part of their family had rocked the entire Weasley family to its core.

     “I get it, I do, but I worry about you. I just want you to know you’re not alone Y/N.”

     I pulled the girl into another tight hug, “I know.”

     Ginny pulled away first, clearing her throat, “Okay! Now that’s out of the way - it’s time to introduce the one and only Y/N L/N to the Weasley’s.”

     I hummed, “Hmmm and which of us should be more scared?”

     “Oh definitely the Weasleys.”

 ~~~~~~~~~~~

     Meeting the Weasley family had gone much better than expected.

     Molly had opened her arms and home to me as if I was one of her own children. By the time the night was over she had me stuffed full of warm food and drink and donning my very own coveted Weasley sweater, the lavender initial in the middle marking it as my own. Arthur had been very interested in my muggle parents and upbringing, questioning me about the functions of a rubber duck. Bill and his wife Fleur were the most stunning couple I have ever seen, and not nearly as intimidating as people portrayed them. Fleur was pleased when she found out I spoke a bit of conversational French and promised to have me over to Shell Cottage (apparently they have an amazing collection of wind chimes that I am dying to see). Percy was a bit more refined. Completely polite and friendly but he seemed reserved. Ginny had explained in one of her letters how much guilt Percy carried after the Battle of Hogwarts over how he had behaved in the years leading up to that day.

     The twins were much different than I remembered them being from the few times we were around each other in school. The physical differences were clear - George’s missing ear and Fred’s dragging limp were both signs of the prices they paid in the war. More than that however, they had matured greatly. They were still happy and made sure to pull at least two pranks over the night, poor Molly nearly lost her voice after they blew up the turkey. However, there was something in their eyes that had been dimmed. Especially in George.

     His twin almost died that night, and it reflected in George’s eyes each time he looked at his older brother. It was clear that he was still afraid because whenever Fred left a room George followed, never letting his brother out of his sight, and if he happened to lose track of him a panic began to swirl in his brown orbs.

     I was in the middle of watching as George yet again made his way to Fred’s side, clapping a large hand on his twins shoulder and throwing his head back in laughter.

     “So which one are you staring at dragoste?”, Charlie whispered as he appeared out of nowhere.

     I ignored the burning in my cheeks as I looked away from the scene in front of me.

     “I am not staring at either of them tampit.”

     “Mhmm, sure, absolutely, I believe you.”, after a quick pause he said, “It’s George isn’t it?”

     I turned and scoffed at him, “No!… How did you know?”

     Charlie let out a chuckle, “Because I know you my little dragon. I also know my brother, and just between us, he definitely likes you as well.”

     At this I let out an incredulous laugh and glanced back to where George was now telling a story, his hands moving animatedly. There was no way that George Weasley had even a remote attraction to me. He was kind, strong, clever, and so bloody gorgeous it truly was a privilege to look at him. And I am…me. Nothing special. Just a girl who had more dragon friends than human ones and whose hands were covered in scars and callouses and whose socks never matched and had never even kissed a man before. So no, there was no way that George Weasley would ever like me.

     “Hey. I know that look Y/N. Stop those thoughts right this bloody second.”

     “Charles it really is annoying when you read me like that.”

     Throwing his arm over my shoulder he began to lead me towards the twins, “Yes I know and I am sorry in advance but this needs to be done. Fred!”

     Charlie’s voice had gone from a rushed whisper to a jovial shout when we reached George, Fred, and Ron by the fireplace. George’s smile as he turned to look at us sent a million butterflies off in my tummy.

     “So Freddy, I was hoping you could help me out with a top secret project tomorrow for mum and maybe show me around the joke shop. I heard you added some new displays that I want to check out.”

     “Sure Charlie”, Fred glanced at George as he spoke, “I’m sure we can make some time for our favorite brother.”

     Ignoring Rons protest, Charlie gripped my shoulders and pushed me in front of him, “Actually George I was thinking you could stay here and show Y/N around the area. She mentioned wanting to talk a walk tomorrow and I would hate to disappoint her on her first Christmas out of the sanctuary.”

     “Um-”

     I interrupted the rejection coming from George, “No please, I would hate to be a bother and make you be stuck with me all day. I’m sure Ginny can take me.”

     George smiled and shook his head, “No it’s completely fine Y/N. I would be happy to show you around.”

     “Okay great! It’s settled then!”, Charlie looked rather too pleased with himself and obviously missed the look exchanged by his identical younger brothers.

~~~~~~~~~~

     The next morning the Burrow was a flurry of movement as everyone began their day. Apparently Charlie and Fred weren’t the only ones on their way out. The others still had some last minute gift shopping to do and Ron was spending the day with Hermione’s muggle family. After breakfast, a quick wink from Charlie, and a slam of the front door - George and I were alone in the house.

     The two of us stood facing one another in the living room for a few awkward moments before George spoke, “Well, um, did you want to head out as well?”

     “Oh sure! Yes, let me just grab my boots really quickly.”

     George led me out the door and onto the snow covered path towards the small, iced over river. Nothing was said for a while, the only sound was the crunch of snow under our boots and the occasional sniffle from one of our red noses. I was mentally imagining all the ways I was going to kick Charlie’s ass when he got back for suggesting a walk in the middle of winter when we came to the top of a hill and stopped.

     Everything as far as the eye could see was blanketed in sheets of white. Stomping my boots down into the fresh snow, I couldn’t help the giggle that escaped as the snow gave way underfoot. Feeling a pair of eyes on me I remembered that I wasn’t alone and turned to see George watching me with an unidentifiable look on his face.

     “Sorry, sorry. That was - I don’t know why I did that. I liked the feeling of the crunch of the snow I guess. Sorry.”

     George grinned, “You don’t have to apologize. It was cute.”

     I could feel my face flush at his words. His smile grew even wider at the sight of my heated face. My gaze dropped from his pretty face down to my boots. I could feel the thick socks I had on beginning to grow cold and wet from how long we’d been outside. Looking back up I could see George’s deep eyes glaze over. Assuming it was because he had been apart from Fred so long I glanced out at the view one last time before turning back the way we came.

    ��“We should probably get back. We’ve been gone a while and my toes are getting wet. I feel bad enough that Charlie forced you to do this anyways without you getting frostbite or something. I’ve had frostbite, it’s not fun. And now I’m rambling. I’m sorry. Sorry”

     George was shaking his head at me and said, “You are so weird.”

     Ouch. My chest tightened and the small smile I had been wearing dropped from my face. If I had been able to see past the tears forming in my eyes that were making my sight blurry, I would have seen George’s face do the same. Unfortunately, all I could focus on was that word. Weird. Strange. Abnormal. Freak. 

     Weird weird weird.

     The walk back was silent. A thick tension surrounded you both as thick snow flurries began to swirl down in the midmorning air. Just as thick was the lump forming in my throat as I fought back tears. I know I shouldn’t let his words affect me. He’s just some guy. But deep down I also know that he’s not just some guy. This is George fricking Weasley. With his stupid perfect face and gorgeous eyes and his loyalty to his family. I couldn’t help but be enamored with him from the moment I walked in the Weasley’s front door. So it hurt to hear the man I liked call me that nasty word that has haunted me my entire life.

     When we finally reached the Burrow, George tried to reach for my arm but I pulled away and ran into the house. I could hear that some of the others had returned and really wanted to avoid a confrontation. Once again, luck wasn’t on my side. Charlie came walking out of the kitchen and saw me in the entryway. His face immediately became concerned at the sight of me and he lowered the sandwich he had from his mouth.

     “Draga?”, Charlie’s voice followed me as I finally reached the stairs and launched upstairs.

     As I reached the first landing I heard him speak again, his voice rough and hard.

     “What did you do?”  

[glassesandkim]

i'm sorry but grieving is no excuse to lash out at people or to project your own insecurities the way nico did in the past. and neither is using your partner the way you would a sex doll just because you're walling up and refusing to open up. this is coming from an addict in recovery btw and accountability is important. now this is fictional but the narrative should have still acknowledged nico's actions and had a proper resolution

I’m not sure what the goal of your asks are because idk if you’re just coming across my blog recently or if you’ve misunderstood something I’ve said but I’m frustrated by this series of asks

Nico's actions were shitty and would ideally be addressed in canon. However, I stand on the fact that even people who do shitty things are deserving of empathy and compassion. During those eps, anons were driving people out of fandom because if you didn't totally see Nico as the shittiest boyfriend ever, then you’re automatically trash. 

Nico hasn't been magically forgiven or absolved of any guilt, and that doesn't change the fact that he's an imperfect character. I've said before that the perfect character is implausible and in terms of storytelling, a lazy, boring, unrealistic, and uncreative way of writing a character. You’ve said yourself that he’s never been provided the explanation or resolution to his actions. And that everything that’s happened with Nico and his parents and Levi was dismissed with one sentence (”I know you deserve better”). 

Villains in marvel have had sob stories to humanize them and they’re still the villain but Nico literally has zero. He’s not even afforded that and he’s not supposed to be the villain.

So I do not appreciate you coming in and telling me I have to manage my expectations or that my life isn’t the backstory that was chosen for Nico. 

I know.

And even though this work is fictional and he only has a small role, the mere existence of Nico Kim’s character still impacts real life and real people. Like it or not, greys is not some fantasy au universe. It’s supposed to be a dramatized version of real life. And with real life comes real life issues, like poor rep and racism.

Nico’s actions go hand in hand with his identity as a gay asian man. This followthrough you’re expecting, should also be applied to how poc and queer characters are written in today’s media. If they didn’t want someone like me to connect to a character like him, then they should’ve just casted a white man.

So regardless of the size of the role, characters from marginalized backgrounds deserve stories that resonate with the communities they're representing. Television writers and producers are capable of that, and we as their audience should not be policing each others thoughts and demanding we settle for less (esp in a well-funded, long running primetime drama like Greys).

This is what I talk mostly about on my blog: How the writing for schmico has been shit in handling poc and queer stories. How schmico’s storyline is written strictly from Levi’s pov (re: from a cishet white pov). And how by doing so, has made audiences villainize Nico when WORSE characters have existed on the show but get away with in both in canon and fandom.

I don’t expect people to always agree or understand me. I only wish to provide a place where likeminded people can come interact together because they’re missing something, or wanting something that isn’t being given to them from this show or western American media in general. 

The problem is not me and I’d argue it’s not even the fandom’s problem. The problem is in the writing, in the network, in the show. 

As @schmico-ing said so well: Maybe Grey's should've thought of that before they paraded Alex Landi for groundbreaking representation™ 

And I am not dismissing your experience as an addict in recovery and I see that is an experience I do not have and that is what has shaped your interpretation of schmico’s story (see how that works both ways?) and would in different circumstances (where if you didn’t tell me that I shouldn’t expect good asian queer rep because he’s only a recurring character), be something I’d be interested in exploring.

So it’d be cool if I wasn’t told to manage my expectations. 

[luninosity]

Okay, some The Falcon and the Winter Soldier episode 1 thoughts! This one will be spoilery, so I’ll tag it and put it under a cut and all of that!

Thoughts not in any real order, just as I think of them, the morning after (we stayed up to watch at midnight, and then went to bed!):

-okay, action-y opening, I’m neutral about that

-on va voir! :D :D

-I like seeing Sam struggling with the idea of the shield and his heroic identity and what being Captain America means...would’ve liked to see him try it, once, before giving it up; I feel like he would try, because it’s what Steve asked of him (and there’s a difference between doing it for that reason and doing it because he chooses to, which would’ve been an interesting tension!)

-mmm, gorgeous museum exhibit shots, and such a good backdrop, thematically, for Sam and Rhodey discussing what it means to be Captain America (also: yay Rhodey!)

-spectacular Bucky nightmare scene, recapturing the menace of the Winter Soldier; oh, so many Bucky feels, and, oh, that moment of him waking up, sleeping on his floor...ow, my heart

-on a shallower note, I miss Seb’s longer hair; it was so distinctive as a look, versus all the short-haired clean-cut Marvel Men (but I also get why they’d have short-haired Bucky in this series: distinguishing then and now, visually and symbolically)

-Bucky’s therapist is genuinely terrible (like, wow) and I’m glad he got to call her out on it (also a good nod to the Winter Soldier having some knowledge of psychology/strategy)

-good to see a character (who very much needs it) getting therapy, on screen, though!

-also nice that we’ve established that Bucky’s been officially pardoned; good to know, and he deserves that recognition that he’s not at fault

-what’s with the weird super-close-up shots? Not that Sebastian isn’t pretty, but the camera’s basically sitting on his cheek. I’m not exactly complaining but it’s distracting me from the storytelling, mostly because I’m wondering who thought this was a good stylistic choice. Those’re some lovely Seb eyelashes, but, like...pull back. Pull that camera back. Back up. Space, please.

-ooh, competence porn! Yes please. (This goes for both Sam and Bucky.)

-Torres might be my new favorite. He’s adorable. Which means I fully expect something terrible to happen to him any second now.

-both Seb and Anthony are such good actors - they’re both so good at micro-expressions, emotion in the shift of eyes or a change in stance

-I love Sam’s sister Sarah!

-more specifically, I love that it’s obviously an affectionate relationship, but not necessarily an easy one, and she has more of an understanding of how the real non-superhero world works than he does, and she’ll tell him so - I’m liking the nuance and emotion here; it feels very real, and it’s not like Melodramatic Resentment for him being busy hero-ing, which they could’ve opted for; no, it’s a genuine sort of weariness and love

-why no video games, for the kids? are they being punished? weird anti-video-game prejudice? (as someone who grew up in a household that didn’t approve of video games, I was at a *distinct disadvantage* when everyone else had this cultural touchstone and I didn’t! and because their mom doesn’t give a reason or a time limit, this blanket ‘no’ line comes off as weirdly restrictive to me - I’d’ve gone with “...until you finish a chore or read a book or do x thing first” - and of course the kids don’t listen, because why would they? idk, probably overthinking this one, but I was also always that kid who needed reasons for things - I never responded well to “because I say so” or “that’s just how it is,” but if you told me why, then I’d totally listen! anyway, this one’s just a weird personal ?? in my head!)

-love love love the bank scene - the sheer awfulness of the juxtaposition of the hero and fanboy emotions, and the harsh reality of loans and denial and Sam’s realization that he can’t help, and also his sister’s body language all through this scene

-I have questions about how the world’s working here: like, I totally believe the banks, government, etc, would be dicks about *not* helping people! yes, agreed! but on the other hand, surely, surely, there must be some provision in place for people who got snapped. Especially now that some time has passed. Like...it’s too big a thing for there to not be some sort of policy or help. The “you’ve had no income for the last five years” line reads oddly to me as justification, because...well...he was snapped! so...of course not! but then again, of course banks would have a lack of compassion. I don’t know, maybe it’s just clunky dialogue, but I kind of want more explanation of this

-also nice that they’re addressing the concept that simply being a superhero doesn’t pay, and not everyone has Tony Stark money! (side question: does Bucky have money? I know we have fandom “canon” about this, but will the show and official canon address it?)

-please don’t let anything happen to Torres, I love him

-Bucky’s trying so hard, and it’s so heartbreaking! And, oh, Bucky...stepping in to defuse problems, wanting peace, trying to care for people...the core of his character, from protecting skinny!Steve to being a good sergeant to saving Steve in The Winter Soldier...okay, show, you’re winning me over. Partly that’s Sebastian’s acting; again, just phenomenal, nuanced and subtle and complex.

-Bucky versus Lucky Cat! I’m laughing but also ouch, the swinging arm reminder.

-I appreciate a Bucky Barnes who is genuinely a soft awkward old-man dork

-I also appreciate Bucky being sweet and old-fashioned and charming - the flowers! - he’s trying so hard. Oh, my heart. (On the other hand...is dating...really a good idea? Then again, he’s a polite awkward dork and couldn’t say no to being set up...)

-how can Sebastian put so much emotion into the simple act of closing and opening his eyes?!

-I do very much want to know where Steve is and if he’s alive

-also, both Sam and Bucky speaking multiple languages! again with the competence porn and also linguistic porn, mmm, yes

-not much known about the Bad Guys yet, but that’s okay; I’m good with spending 50 minutes on character development, yes, fine by me, show me more Bucky caring for people and Sam being Uncle Sam (heh), I live for this

-it’s an interesting choice of Bad Guys, because to some extent you can see why it sounds appealing: no flags, no borders, no countries, etc - I hope we also get some more exploration of this

-I’m glad Torres is okay but I fully expect him to be a sacrifice at some point

-US Agent time! Oh, Sam’s expression(s) - just perfect. Oh, Anthony Mackie’s just great here - every reaction, jaw-clench, his posture - so compelling.

-now go get your shield, Sam!

-how are we going to wrap this all up in 5 more episodes?! Sam and Bucky haven’t even shared screen time yet! and what about Zemo? and Sharon?

-ooh, pretty credits!

-okay, I’m actually really pleasantly surprised! I went in with low expectations because I really disliked all the trailers and all the bits of dialogue they were giving us, and now I’m...cautiously optimistic!

-I’m still worried that once we get Bucky and Sam together we’re going to devolve into that specific “someone thinks that two people insulting each other is the same as humor” type of writing (and I cannot begin to tell you how much I hate the “that girl kicked your ass!” line from the trailers)

-but this first episode is such a good character-driven exploration - unhurried, deep, thoughtful, grounded - that it’s giving me hope. I actively want to see the next episode, with some excitement, so that’s promising!

[gryffindorkxdraws]

Want to start off by saying that I love your mind! I was hoping to get your opinion on: what is it in jackunzel that makes it feel so right?

EDIT: changed a few things ehe

ngl i found this challenging cus it made me think of how the answer would vary per person (yeah i went there idk why sdjkknds) so lemme get logical for a sec here haha

what exactly is the definition of “feel right”? 

to make someone feel relaxed and comfortable, as merriam-webster states

simple as that, right? but wait there’s more

what makes something/someone go under that category? 

now from there it expands because there are so many ways of answering that with everyone having different opinions and mindsets.

fair warning before we push on, this is going to get messy (like a word vomit) with how i’m just going to pour out everything i can think off, but just know i really like this question hence the, uh, mess? lmao

so back to your question, what is it in jackunzel that makes it feel so right?

in one POV, it could be because of how rapunzel and jack represent the sun and the moon respectively, making them two contrasting sides who shouldn’t collide and yet, against all odds and opposing forces that would come between them, they did. 

and we can bet on the fact that they fought hard/struggled for it, depending on how fanfic writers play with it (reminds of this sun/moon au that sold me to this trope lmao).

just because others said it’s impossible or it’s against whatever, why should they listen to the “norm?” what even is considered “normal,” when the two can explore so much more of what they could be missing from life after stepping out of others’ shadows?

i just love sun/moon dynamics. i’m obsessed lmao i read the ones below somewhere and idk where but it’s been living in my head rent free and i can’t escape it tho feel free to correct me about any of these symbol topic!

like the Sun, thoughtful and full of energy to share with everyone, is connected with one’s self and known to, yeah, radiate warmth or light. it also symbolizes firmness, strength and power. oh and life too i guess?

while the Moon, subtle but full of mysteries and wonders, can also get emotional and sway others to be more nurturing. cus like it also symbolizes calmness, beauty, and nurture. plus eternity and enlightenment?

the list goes on if we head into more of what it both symbolize, but when these two celestial bodies get together, masculine and feminine energies unite. the Sun gives out life, while the Moon cultivates it.

i have no idea where i’m going but moving on

maybe it’s that taste of rebellion with going against the authorities/society/rules/of what has always been set to find out who they’re meant to be or, y’know, finding their identity without the shackles of others (like jack learning he has the potential to be a guardian and embracing it in his own time, and rapunzel realizing she’s the lost princess and works hard to be a good one), 

or there’s something about the mystery that follows the other because they’ve never met anyone quite like them (like exploring a world they’ve never set foot on), 

or finding all the good and bad in each other and in their differences, but still loving the other for who they are, 

or what one lacks the other makes up for it and vice versa. with or without them realizing they can help each other grow to be a better version of themselves.

opposites attract who are bound to be full of surprises.

but on the contrary, they could also be two peas of a pod. aight this definitely goes against what i said above with all the opposites and stuff, but hear me out.

while they grew up and learned how to cope with life differently, they somehow still share the same sentiments when it comes to, for example, reaching their goals. 

they have their own way to go about it, sure, but my point is they can reach a common ground better together compared when they’re with others.

like rapunzel with the lanterns, and jack with his memories. at first, one hesitated and wavered, while the other disagreed and pulled away. it was only after they saw a chance/realized this was it that they agreed in a heartbeat

they ultimately made the choice of diving in head first regardless of their initial thoughts in the first place. kinda like the moment they realized they can be a step closer to what they’ve been yearning for their whole life 

bam, out of the way, they’re coming through lmao

not only that, but they can also be soft, gentle, understanding despite rapunzel’s spontaneuosness and jack’s mischievousness. we’ve seen them interacting with children and they’re so good at lifting their spirits up to have some fun and that there will always be a tomorrow.

and with their peers too. rapunzel lights up even the darkest of rooms, may it be like fireworks to bring joy or a campfire to warm one’s heart. jack meanwhile keeps things light when everyone else feels tense, easing others to relax and remember there’s always a way out

don’t forget the way they both sacrifice themselves for who they care for. like, they just do that, putting others first before them. that scene of saving eugene and baby tooth aaahhhhdjhdskdjkbkfjdkjf

and when everything comes crashing down and the world feels heavy on their shoulders, they both know they’re not alone with the other there for them.

maybe it’s the mutual understanding they have for each other after opening up, and finding a friend/partner/home through the connection they made together,

or they could be a push and pull that leads them to showing an unexpected side of the other, but in reality they always had it in them and all they needed was someone to show the way,

or how they complement each other, but they’re not two halves of a whole, no, rather they’re already whole themselves and they only reminded each other that they are,

or it’s simply because they don’t feel the need to put up walls or anything of the likes, because they know that no matter what they’ll be accepted for who they are.

opposites who have so much more in common than they originally thought

in another POV it could be because of how they give such partners in crime vibe. lowkey or highkey, take your pick. nothing would stop them from moving forward to a new tomorrow, or honestly whatever it is they put their minds to. 

and i am here for that

like i said in one of my posts, “They were a magnet for trouble, with the Sun being a free-spirited and vivacious fellow, and with the Moon’s knack for mischief and being a rebel without cause.” 

while both are adventurous, ready to explore whatever is out there, all the while just wanting to have some fun, they still balance each other out.

with jack usually ready to do what he needs/wants to do (which helps rapunzel to trust her gut and take the risk. that he’ll be there for her whenever she’s ready to step out of her comfort zone and jump away from her tower)

and with rapunzel knowing how to handle sticky situations properly (which reminds jack that not everything has to be done harshly and abruptly. that while freezing someone could be fun, it won’t solve things in the long run)

am i making sense? idek but you’re stuck with me lol but before i forget and i can’t believe i just remembered now. the way they can help fill in on what the other is missing 

rapunzel wants to see the world, what goes out there, with the people, society, and history i feel. and jack can take her to wherever she wants to go. hell, he’ll even surprise her and bring her to places he’d think she’ll like.

with his experiences, he’s bound to have an endless list of plans for them to go through and it’s no surprise that she’ll love it, and (him) his gesture, nonetheless

jack wants to be noticed by others, to be seen and heard for who he is. and rapunzel is such a welcoming person that she accepts him wholeheartedly. give him the love he was deprived of for years. 

reassure him that even he has a place to call home because why would he be excluded from that? he deserves it just as much as she and everyone else does

also i like to think they brainstorm ideas together

maybe it’s how they’re both game for an adventure, sudden or not, and this makes it easy for them to team up together and take on the world

or the feeling of familiarity as they click and everything flows naturally to them, where nothing is forced or uncomfortable between them

or how it’s like they can hold on to each other, knowing the other won’t let go no matter what because they’ll always have each other through the ups and downs

or it’s in their shared smiles, mischievous sparks in their eyes, moving together to the music of their synchronized heartbeats, as they step forward to the vast unknown

finding the ‘one’ who understands them inside out that they feel at home with them

i’ve said so many things and threw out so many brain rot, but what exactly is my final answer? 

it’s simple: who knows? now before you toss me aside, and i hope not lmao, lemme just say even with that kind of final verdict, you can still find beauty in it. 

you see, there’s so much more to explore and delve into with jackunzel because of their potential, that i don’t want to make a set answer for your question. i’d rather much help you, and anyone else wondering, to come to an answer yourself and maybe even share/discuss it with others.

i’m running out of brain juice, but i at least hope this helped satisfy your curiosity behind your question since this is all i can give… for now, maybe? who knows lmao 

tho i’ll be honest and admit i based these on how i feel about jackunzel. so if ever someone else out there wants to add more points they thought of, feel free to add on this

[hebescus]

remember this ship ask? yeah, i wanna do them all with lawlight bcs they control my brain. but it's a happy no death note au bcs it's me. oh and this shit is long plus it's 3 am rn so my words are very messy. but enjoy.

(i skip some numbers that i answered and the ones that i can't think of btw)

pre relationship :

How did they first meet?

L's investigation hq. he was a suspect of L, still, but this time he told soichiro to bring this 18 yo boy to the hq to test him, asking light to work with all of them. he ends up not guilty ofc, but L still wants to keep him…around.

What was their first impression of each other?

ah, the good old 'what the fuck dude???' from light and the 'oooh he got a big brain' from L. it's hard to get out of canon in this one.

Who felt romantic feelings first?

L. But it's more like thoughts, rather than feelings. It's just these random thoughts that pop out in his head like 'i don't mind kissing this guy, if he asks' but not like 'i want to kiss him' yknow what i mean? idk this is just something i experience a lot lmao. it develops to feelings once light falls for him and L can see that. So in terms of ideas, it's L, but in terms of feelings, it's Light.

Did either of them try to resist their feelings?

Oh our favorite light denial yagami. Of course he's cursing himself for having feelings like this but once L calls it out he's over. 

If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think?

Light would laugh it off, and be like "i don't like him that way you know". L would shrugs be like "well yes that's possible, i don't think i mind". 

What would their lives be like if they had never met?

boring, lonely, empty, you name it

(more under the cut)

general :

Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go?

hmm, they both initiated the relationship? ykwim? They both notices they had feelings for each other and just...go from there. they never have like a relationship talk, they just go with the flow until at some point they starts to get comfortable to refer the other as partners. They basically can read each other's mind, after all.

Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like?

Yes, sort of. A tennis game! And a coffee sesh after, just like canon. They plan this to be just "let's just relax, this case has been really exhausting, take a one day break, L" but when Light got home, sayu asked "how's the date going?!" He immediately said "it's not a date, you watch too many dramas it's rotting your brain" And sachiko gave him a smile while shaking her head at this statement and when he's back to his room he immediately calls L and was like "hey does that count as a date?" and L answers with "depends, do you want it to be?" with a smirk that light can hear.

What was their first kiss like?

it was late at night, light was helping L with the case when everybody went home. they were sharing their view about this certain criminal when light notices L staring at his lips, first he ignored it but it happens again and again to a point where their face just got real close and then...kiss, somehow. idk lmao.

Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)?

First person who can understand each other and are equals, the only ones who can tear the other's wall down, and just practically soulmates in any form that even their sun & moon signs mirroring each other's? YES. 

What’s their height difference? Age difference?

i hc L as just a little bit taller than light, but it's not like you can see it through the hunch anyway. ofc we all know the 6 years and 4 months age gap

What’s their relationship with each other’s families?

Sayu likes L, Sachiko is kinda surprise Light doesn't date a typical pretty person, but it only makes her heart fonder. L doesn't mind them, he thinks they're nice, light grew up in a good place. Soichiro? Well, he might me a bit reluctant but he loosen up slowly, his son is happier than he ever was, after all.

Who takes the lead in social situations?

Light, obviously. Because he's a charmer and if L takes control, the person they speak to would run immediately the first 2 minutes.

Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear?

it is a universal knowledge that L does this. like, come on, count the fics, you can't, there's just so many. he loves to break that perfect wall and make light feel 🥴😳. it's entertaining. But he knows when to stop. too much of that will be embarrassing in light's part, and he respects his boy's dignity.

love :

Who said “I love you” first?

Light!! The thing is it was said over the phone. He gets more and more comfortable talking with L through calls, since every now and then L travel frok countries to countries. One time he just like "yeah, safe flight. love you, bye" he expected L to say goodnight to him as a response as usual but L was silent and he realised what he just said and realised that he fucking mean it. L seems to still be able to read his mind even thousands miles away so he replies with "i love you too, goodnight". they never missed seeing each other more than that night.

What are their primary love languages?

we had a discussion for this! but as we see in canon, they're both very acts of service with a little hint of physical touch here and there. quality time is also important. words and gift aren't really needed for them.

Who uses cheesy pick-up lines?

L. Only to annoy light. It's terrible that he almost cringed to himself, but it does bring a good laugh for light.

How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA?

PDA is a not their preference, they just love being in private more. They might hold hands sometimes, butmost times they won't. Altho they always stand or sit reaaaaally glued to each other even though there are so many space. 

Who initiates kisses?

both. they want it, they got it. but light gives light kisses (ha) more, not necessarily on the lips, usually when L was really busy working, keeping his feet on the ground.

Who’s the big and little spoon?

They don't spoon a lot, they prefer not touching at all or cufdling face to face, but when they do, Light is the little spoon because being a big spoon makes his sleeping position kinda uncomfy, he feels awkward with his legs, it's just not. thankfully L thinks cuddling light this way is very calming.

What are their favorite things to do together?

Tennis and solving cases, duh. Or sometimes they play video games fighting each other. Anything competitive and/or challenging that make their brain grow 10 times bigger. But sometimes, a comfortingly peaceful and quiet dinner with hushed words thrown here and there about random things feels like the best thing ever.

Who’s more protective?

L. For identity reasons, ofc.

Do they prefer verbal or physical affection?

Physical. They can read each other's mind, they knew it by gesture, touches, and glances. 

What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise?

IT'S MY TIME TO SHINE. venus by sleeping at last fits them so well, that song is in the background of multiple cozy couch smooches sessions or even when they're slow dancing (please listen to this tho song it's so good). also i think they would like persephone by the tragic thrills too, L would be like "this song reminds me of you" and Light answers with "i'm persephone?" "Yeah" "i'm a fucking badass then" "yes you are". oh and first day of my life? lover of mine? pink in the night? sweet creature? the lakes? oh god i have too much answers

What kind of nicknames do they call each other?

they don't do nicknames, really. although, L sometimes called light with some snarky tony stark styled nicknames when he feels particularly playful but annoyed at the same time.

Who remembers the little things?

They both do. Big brained assholes they are.

domestic life :

If they get married, who proposes?

It's not really a proposal, they didn't  even remember who said it first. But one sleepy night after a hard case, someone said "hey you wanna get married" and the other was like "sure, why not" "really?" "yeah, i think i'm ready, you?" "me too" "great" and then they go to sleep. at breakfast the next morning L called watari from across the room and said "wammy i need you to prepare [enter marriage stuff here], and light, you must call your family after this". poor old watari chokes on his tea.

What’s the wedding like? Who attends?

The wedding is in a secluded little place near the wammy's house, L used to go there a lot as a kid. With just light's parents, sayu, and watari. Well, not until Light caught Mello, Matt, Near, and Linda peeping from the bushes

Do they have any pets?

A chunky cat the wammy's kids feed daily but never try to keep them in, because no animals are allowed inside the orphanage. L saw it and was like "light let's bring this bitch home" she is, indeed a little bitch, but light and L loves her dearly. her fur has light brown and black colors, like both of their hairs, so she becomes their daughter, L gave him a weird ass name but i can't think about it rn.

Who kills the bugs in the house?

Light because he's the one who's actually bothers to. They ofc annoyed L but he cpuldnt care less to actually get rid of them.

Who’s more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning?

L. He rarely sleeps and once he did, he wakes up very fucking late and will pull light back to the bed if he's woken up by the empty space beside him.

Who’s the better cook?

Light. L is a spoiled brat. But Light can't bale for shit, that's Watari's job. Light grow up learning and helping his mom making meals for the family. He's not the best, but it's good enough to make L craves them in between his sweets.

Who likes to dance?

None of them. But they would slow dance on rare, sentimental occasions. And it's like so fucking romantic bcs all the lights are off except for a candle or a table lamp or a cabinet lamp whatever that has yellow-y dim light. And they don't speak, they just casually move against each other, but heart ready to combust like i do when i the mental image came into my head.

[darkpoisonouslove]

Riven x Musa

Ok, so I keep seeing posts everywhere that basically badmouth S8 and after seeing ten seconds of the trailer (YIKES to the animation, what’s wrong with the industry that they are making everything anime? Powerpuff Gen Z, I’m looking at you – obs: I didn’t watch it fully yet) I can see where some of the criticism is coming from but anyways…

My favorite Winx!couple EVER has always been Musa x Riven since I was kid and first watched the show (Netflix is not helping ‘cause I ship them even there).

I remember yawning at Bloom/Sky, rolling my eyes at Stella/Brandom and making a completely incredulous expression that I could literally feel forming on my face at Helia/Flora (can anyone say ‘unrealistic’?). Timmy/Tecna are a second favorite.

And why my Winx OTP are Riven x Musa followed after Timmy x Tecna? Because it reflects real life. In real life you’re not gonna stumble into people whose real and deep relationship problems are solved in twenty four minutes (not even that considering that some episodes present the “problem” half-way through said 24 minute-episode).

The breakup between Riven and Musa in S6 (spoilers everywhere after all) was one of the most mature breakups in the history of breakups with the hope for the future (yes, I’m completely ignoring S7, sue me, the whole thing was one huge filler anyways). And, after reading a lot of opinions on both ends (defending Musa/attacking Riven and defending Riven/attacking Musa) and watching the episodes in question (reuniting through reconciling) I think I can give my own analysis.

Since Musa AND Riven (individually and as couple) are my favorite characters in Winx, I think I CAN give a fairly unbiased view (hopefully).

*clears throat*

Ok, keep in mind that I’m defending BOTH of them, because I ship them too hard not to.

Musa Being OC (sometimes being called ‘brat’): C'mon, people! Musa and Tecna are OC since S4 anyways, where are the tomboy and the nerd? With the sneakers, T-shirt and comfortable-looking clothes? Noooo, now they all need neat skirts and hot pink high heels and long, glamorous hair. Do they look good? Of course, but and I would totally be less pissed if there was ANY indication on the reason for the change. Are they just maturing? Expressing themselves differently? Crowd mentality? Tune and Stella finally broke Musa down and Tecna followed soon after? Was it just to please Riven and Timmy? ANYTHING (even the 'pleasing a boy’ would at least be A reason - a ridiculous one that would piss me off, but A reason none the less), was just a sudden impulse that took?

Sure, we can talk about “character growth” until we are blue in the face, but the matter of the fact is that there was none.

The changes we see in Musa and Tecna are basically the creators making them more like the rest of the Winx (I’m including Aisha in this too, where is the sporty girl that matched the boy’s interest in extreme sports? C'mon! Even Bloom and her Girl Next Door looks are replaced with Bratz and Clueless-level of outfits).

Is anyone really going to look me in the eye and say Stella wasn’t a shallow (if friendly and good-natured) Mean Girl? She got better, but as I re-watch the show (currently in S3, meaning almost half-way through the content), Stella still worries more about her hair than anything else even while under literal fire.

More and more, Musa, Tecna and Aisha are losing their identities and what made them, IMO, the more badass Winx.

How did the two on the left went from this…

… to this:

Yeah, yeah, Musa still sings, Tecna still technobabble and Aisha is still a Warrior Princess but Aisha was the first one to go Bloom and Stella on us with Musa and then Tecna following soon after. It’s not just their clothing style, it’s the way they carried themselves too.

Right now? The only thing keeping them apart is their BF blues (different kind of blues) and some personal interests (singing, shopping, tech, the whole drama with Domino/Sparks, etc). But that’s IT, their personalities are going down the drain!

Sorry for the long-winded text, but the reason I’m expressing my disappointment at their change is because Musa’s reaction fits it. S6 we have such an AMAZING breakup (didn’t even think that was possible, WTH, right? Amazing breakup?) only for her to be mad as hell at Riven at S8? Bad writing, that has been dragging her (and the rest of the Winx) down to becoming just one unilateral, shallow character (the Specialists are also falling into that pit, what in the world did they do Helia in S8? He sounds like Thor telling about his “brave exploits” there, yikes). And continuity what? What continuity? Do they even remember how the breakup was written?

But ok, let’s put the Audience View aside for a moment and focus only on the In-Universe terms.

S6: You’ll always be my hero.

S8: What on EARTH are you doing here. 

I laughed a bit, the contrast just got to me but instead of getting mad at one or the other like most of the fandom, I laughed.

Musa followed that by saying that Riven has not maintained contact and just in that I would be beyond pissed as well and giving my support to Musa. WTH, Riven? I think that each season is more less six months to a year? Sort of? Still, zero contact for so long even after ending on amicable terms and wanting to stay friends? And he went off on his own! A text now going, “I’m not dead” would be the bare basics for Musa not to worry herself bald!

BUT then I also read comments about how this was a two-way street, why didn’t Musa call either? That’s unfortunately something that I very much doubt will ever be explained. One of those: did it or didn’t it? Musa could have called and went straight to voicemail with no signs of life from Riven or she might not have called and just expected him to call as if feminism were dead and all initiative must come from the guy (which doesn’t even fit because they parted as friends).

Since we have no info on the above, I put it on both of them. It’s not fair to say, “HE should have called!” or “Why didn’t SHE call?” because we don’t have fricking context. So the only thing we can take is: no contact.

BECAUSE I put the lack of contact on both of them, Musa’s reaction was a little too much, however, Riven shows up all smirks and leaning against a tree with his arms crossed and I would have flashbacks to S1 if it wasn’t for the animation style that made all the guys look like girls. Dude! Not the time for that kind of posture. Not saying that he should be all sheepish and rubbing his arm as if he had done something horrible (again: we don’t have context on the no contact) but a more neutral approach was warranted here. Nobody does themselves any favors with that kind of attitude no matter what how high of a horse they may be (rightly or not) riding on, if anything I would react like Musa solely on that one.

Next episode we have that Riven convinced the guys to follow the girls in some mission and Musa was angry. Again: I would be too. WTH? Yes, yes, they helped and if it wasn’t for them, the Winx would gotten seriously injured but Musa did have a point saying that this demonstrated that they had no trust in them and need their hand held, it was no sanctioned mission like on Earth after all. BUT, Riven does something that I would never expect from in S1-4: he explains, he reasons it, he puts it in all the words that he does trust Musa and co and that he only wanted to show that he’d be there for her (you know? One of the main issues in S6 that made them breakup in the first place? His inability to conciliate Specialist work with supporting his girlfriend and ultimately failing or feeling like failing in both?) and Musa still pouts, crosses her arms, and turns around. Geez. I expected that one from Stella, not Musa. I think the closest Musa has ever come to THIS was back in S2 when Jared explains that Riven was the one to recommend that he interview Musa and yada yada yada and she got mad and stomped off on the poor guy that didn’t even understand what was going on (only to immediately apologize to Jared and recognizing that it wasn’t him that she was mad at… like I said: what character growth?).

Riven then goes to show that he indeed grew when he asked for advice from Sky and Brandon (WTH, right? Can we picture that happening back in S1-3? He very grudgingly would LISTEN to UNSOLICITED advice from Nabu and Helia in S4-6). And does a very, very goofy and embarrassing show of affection. Yeah… again… I can picture Stella loving the light show with her face for IDK how many people to see but not Musa (although can we really blame the guy after the series went out of its way to make Musa all Stella-like? Clothes, attitude, the only thing missing is making Riven carry her shopping bags around and call him “Shnookums” (although the mental image is already enough for me to fall over laughing, just for the face Riven would make). Still, I have to count that one against Riven if only because (as much as the show gives only lip service to it) Musa isn’t Stella.

Riven being mind controlled (again) aside, those two are back together. And on the overall? Riven showed more growth than any other character in the show COMBINED (he is the Zuko of the show), that doesn’t go to say that he didn’t make mistakes since coming back in S8 (but that was more a guy trying to win back a girl than… betraying his friends for a pair of nice legs or… IDEK like in S1 – where, mind control or not the show itself made sure to make it clear that he had free will) or that he is now the one out of Musa’s league. I think that NOW it can actually work… if the show allows him to keep the progress, Musa is the next to see her flaws and work on them (which she showed to be able to do since S2) and put effort in the relationship. The difference between them is that Musa can actually work on herself and the relationship at the same time. That’s not me saying she is better than Riven in any way, everybody has their own pace and their own way to cope, to improve and to self-reflect.

I still root for them.

~*~

PS-IDK why, but I read posts about how Riven changed so much and posts about how all his progress disappeared and he is now back to his S1 attitude and I’m just cofused. Yeah, different of opinions and so on, but such opposite opinions on the subject of a guy whose relationship was focused on three episodes? 

[gaylorlyrics]

Folklore Songs - what are they about??

This is a developing thread, but I’ve been listening all day so I’m taking a stab at it.

1."The 1"  

Common consensus is that this is about Dianna Agron and what they could have been. Telling lyrics are the general idea that the relationship wasn’t truly given a chance (”it would've been sweet, If it could've been me”) and “Roaring Twenties”, referring to the below circus themed party pics with Diana dressed like a flapper

tbh im not totally sold on this - most because it seems more recent with lyrics like, “In my defense, I have none for never leaving well enough alone” sounds like a reference to ME! and “Roaring twenties” sounds like a reference to something that happened this year (2020). Also “throwing pennies in the pool” could be a reference to throwing Penni (Karlie’s agent) in the pool. Finally, Route 1 is the road along California’s coast, where Tay & Karlie drove on their legendary road trip...this makes my lil Kaylor heart worry. 

2. Cardigan

This is the first installment in the Teenage Trio, which also includes August and Betty, and is told from the perspective of Betty. It’s about feeling so loved by someone but then being betrayed by them (”Chase two girls [Betty + August’s narrator] lose one”). The line ”And you'd be standin' in my front porch light” foreshadows to James professing love in “Betty”. Potentially Taylor is Betty - but I’m still thinking about that theory.

3."The Last Great American Dynasty"  

We <3 a Rhode Island throwback. Here Taylor tells the story of her house in Rhode Island that Rebekah “Betty” (??!?!??!! more on that later) Harkness used to live in. Rebekah married an heir to Standard Oil which made her one of the wealthiest women in the USA at the time. She was also known for making a scene (”She had a marvelous time ruining everything”). Additionally, she founded the Harkness Ballet (”And blew through the money on the boys and the ballet”). After Rebekah’s death Taylor purchased the house and it is now best known as the place of many epic 4th of July parties.

4. Exile

Such a sad song! This is a duet between Taylor and Bon Iver, telling the story of a failed relationship that they have tried to mend many many times. Interestingly, this is also about a love triangle (like the teenage trio) -  "I can see you starin' honey/Like he's just your understudy." This line specifically feels like it could be about bearding, and seeing someone else with the person you love, but feeling like - or knowing - it’s fake. “You were my town Now I'm in exile seein' you out” references and end to the relationship Taylor discussed in False God “Staring out the window like I'm not your favorite town I'm New York City”. To me this indicates that it is about Karlie and them breaking up or going through a rough patch - continually trying to fix things - and eventually being unsure that it could ever be repaired.

5."My Tears Ricochet"

This is pretty clearly about Scott & Scooter - “And if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake? Cursing my name, wishing I stayed” and “You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same” seem to be a reference to them trying to exploit her work and how her leaving Big Machine really ruined the business - plus there’s some LWYMMD imagery. “You wear the same jewels that I gave you as you bury me” also seems to be a clear reference for trying to use Taylor’s own work against her, taking the profits, and pushing her out of the deal. As if we needed more evidence “You hear my stolen lullabies” clearly references her stolen masters.

6."Mirrorball"  

Big 80s prom vibes from this song. Mirrorball is about being famous and all of her work - her most personal thoughts and dreams - just becoming different ways for other people to see themselves once she releases her music into the world. Part of being an artist is knowing that your work will reflect more of who the viewer is than who you are yourself. Here she uses the metaphor of a disco ball to explore that idea, and worries that she is losing her own identity through it “I'm still trying everything to keep you looking at me”. She also alludes to her fears that she will age out of relevancy “I know they said the end is near”, something she discussed in her documentary Miss Americana. Obviously this is internalized misogyny because we love Taylor and will listen to her music always and do not subscribe to the belief that women need to be young to be relevant because if they were a man then they'd be the man, and tay’s the man <3 

7. “Seven”

Personally, this is one of my favorite songs on the album. It’s so sweet and pure and lovely. This is about young love, with imagery of summer, toys, and child’s dreams to runaway together. Many people have speculated that it is about the same girl that the two unreleased Taylor songs “Sweet Tea and Gods Graces” and “Me & Britney” are about. 

[Side note: initially I wondered if Me & Britney was about Britany Maack, Taylor’s long time friend who recently got married, but the names are spelled differently. Also the line in Seven “I can’t recall your face” indicates that this is about someone who Taylor is not currently in touch with.] 

Both M&B and STAAG seem to be about the Seven relationship because there are general parallels with outdoor scenery, childlike wonder, and ( in the case of STAGG) sweet tea. Also all three songs indicate a gay relationship: STAGG - “And you can love like a sinner and lose like a winner”, M&B - “That boy she went ran off with, well, I thought he was crazy. Maybe I was just jealous that he'd come between me and Britney”, and Seven - “You won't have to cry or hide in the closet And just like a folk song our love will be passed on”.

8. “August”

This is the second installment in the Teenage Trio, told from the perspective of the “other woman” who James meets while on summer vacation. The other woman (she doesn’t seem to have a name...unless it is August...which it could be? idk) is in love, but realizes that James isn’t in love with her - “Will you call when you're back at school? I remember thinkin' I had you”. The line “Remember when I pulled up and said "Get in the car" references the same incident which is retold in Betty, but this time with James telling Betty it was just a summer fling that didn’t mean anything.

9. This Is Me Trying

Here we have a break up song, about Taylor trying to win her lover back and feeling completely lost without them, unable to concentrate or be around people, and turning to self sabotage. It’s about the general loneliness that one feels when they’ve lost someone they truly love, and the miscommunication that can happen in a relationship when you’re not understanding each other or receiving love in the same way (hence the song’s title). I think this could be about Karlie, it seems clear that their relationship has not been smooth and that they have had many on-and-off times. It could also be serving a purpose of building the Joe break up narrative, but only time will tell for that.

10. “Illicit Affairs”

Taylor loves her secret love - this song reads like a sad version of “I Know Places”. It seems clear that this is about Karlie Kloss. “Tell your friends you're out for a run” is one of my favorite lines because Karlie started Klossy run club, where you commit to running a certain distance in a month - and she posts about it on instagram CONSTANTLY. But overall, the song details a relationship of a woman being with someone she doesn’t love (kushnerd) and sneaking around to meet up with the person she does love (tay!). The line “Tell yourself you can always stop” is so sad to me, the idea that Karlie got into this and keeps telling herself that it will only be a little longer and she can leave when she wants, but staying in her fake marriage anyway.

11. Invisible String

This is pretty much the only pure love song on the album - about feeling connected to someone throughout your whole life, knowing that that somebody is out there, and then finally finding them. Taylor talks about being in Centennial Park in Nashville as a teen, and then eventually showing her lover around. The song is really self referential, with lots of easter eggs for her past work, including Bad Blood and Delicate. She also references Joe Jonas with the line “Cold was the steel of my axe to grind For the boys who broke my heart Now I send their babies presents”.

Some people have pointed out that there is a similar idea presented in Jane Eyre - when the protagonist says to her love interest “I have a strange feeling with regard to you. As if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly knotted to a similar string in you."

12."Mad Woman"  

Another Scooter one - “It's obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together”. “The master of spin” is word play referencing the masters records scandal. “Watching you climb over people like me” points out that agents and labels are making money off the performers they find and pushing them around. There’s also a reference to Scooter’s wife Yael and how he cheats all the time, but she doesn’t do anything likely because of her own internalized misogyny - “has a couple side flings. Good wives always know. She should be mad, should be scathing like me”.

13. “Epiphany”

The first verse of this touching ballad is about Taylor’s grandfather in WW2, storming the beaches at Normandy - “Crawling up the beaches now "Sir, I think he's bleeding out"”. The second verse is about a nurse helping patients with Covid-19 - “Holds your hand through plastic now "Doc, I think she's crashing out"”. The bridge here talks about wishing there was some great epiphany, some magical solution for the suffering in the world. The chorus refers to experiencing trauma with others and staying loyal even in the hardest times, even if it means literally dying. Although this seems like a departure from the themes of rest of the album, the whole album examines loyalty and considering what you would do for the people you love - so I really don’t think it’s a departure at all.

14. “Betty”

Obviously this is the gayest song on the album and an early fan favorite. It is the final song in the teenage trio, told from the point of view of James, going to win Betty back after betraying her and sleeping with someone else (August!?) over the summer. The line "Will you kiss me on the porch in front of all your stupid friends?”, a line that is very clearly about wanting to kiss a woman, is especially striking (& gay!) when sung by Taylor. The clearest version of this plot is someone begging for forgiveness after betraying the person they love.

There is also a bit of a nod to a line in “Picture to Burn”, a break up song off Taylor’s first album. In PTB Taylor says “So go and tell your friends that I'm obsessive and crazy that's fine, I’ll tell mine you’re gay”. This lyric has since been changed in versions available online, but on the original album that's what it was. This is interesting because she’s calling attention to knowing that someone is gay and hasn’t told their friends...which you would definitely know if you had dated them.

The names “James” and “Inez” are both mentioned in the song, which are the names of Blake Lively and Ryan Reynold’s daughters. James was already featured on a Taylor Swift album, as the lil baby voice at the beginning of “Gorgeous”. Worth noting that “James” is traditional a male name, but that this character is named after a female.

ALSO I have this theory I’m working on that Taylor is Betty and this whole album is in the same world with the same people, but WILL POST MORE ON THIS LATER.

15."Peace"  

Ok - this is Archer 2.0 for me, about how she is worried about how no one will ever love her or stay with her because its too much work - “the rain is always gonna come if you're standin' with me” and “No, I could never give you peace” are pretty telling lines about her concerns that people will think it is not worth it to be friends with or in a relationship with her due to all of the baggage that comes with it. 

The opening lines - “Our coming-of-age has come and gone Suddenly this summer, it's clear” feed into my emerging theory that all of these songs exist in the same universe and are about the same three characters...but I’m still figuring that one out. The line “And you know that I'd swing with you for the fences Sit with you in the trenches” reference Seven and Epiphany, respectively - further supporting that all of these songs are in the same world.

16. “Hoax”

Out of all of the songs that make my little Kaylor heart ache - this is the most heartbreaking. Specifically the line “My eclipsed sun” refers to Karlie, who Taylor has called “sunshine” on multiple occasions, and her light being covered up by her contract with Kushnerd and Scooter. The line “Don't want no other shade of blue But you” makes it clear that this song is in reference to the muse for the album “Lover” - aka Karlie. 

However, this is a song about betrayal and completely trusting someone, only to find that they stabbed you in the back, as is clear by the line ”Your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in”.

Additionally, the line“You knew it still hurts underneath my scars” seems to again feed into the idea that all of the songs on the album involve the same characters. This one is a bit more clear, it seems that - if this theory is correct - Betty is the narrator of this song, as she referenced her scars before “Drew stars around my scars” in Cardigan.

OK- I'm going to go deep into song by song later, but I just wanted to get something out there!!! Also def interested in hearing what everyone else thinks!

EDIT: I just found some lyrics from The Lakes in an article from Billboard. I wanted to add them in even though we don’t have the full song because I felt like we really ended on a sad note with hoax and then when I saw these I was like there is hope!!

SO the lyric Billboard included in their review was “A red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground / With no one around to tweet it” which is a continuation from the line from “Hoax” - “ This has frozen my ground”. What I’m taking from this is that in the final song Taylor finds hope <3

[alleycat97]

Together Again

Mc(Amy)x Kamilah, Mc(Hallie) x Sam

Bloodbound/TNA Au where the couples meet at dinner and Amy and Hallie realize they’re long lost twins. Part 1

...

Millionaires, Billionaires, fancy clothes, and hot dates. That was the lifestyle it seemed like for a certain elite group. But being elite meant you had to put in the work, long tiring days would get to anyone. Thats why a fancy date night with your special other would solve just about anything....or complicate your life even more.

Kamilah made reservations at the new restaurant in town. Being well known and rich also helped her get a seat on opening night. Just some perks. But Kamilah was also very particular and also formal, unlike her new wife Amy. The poor girl couldn’t tell time to save her life, that or she was just too busy doing nothing as usual to care. So Kamilah just sat waiting, sipping on her cocktail.

Sam Dalton on the other hand was much like Kamilah. Organized and timely, but her fiance Hallie’s playful banter and relaxed lifestyle was making her softer and less rigid in formal settings. Like tonight, she snagged reservations to the cities newest restaurant. Except this time, she was running late.

She let Hallie have the night off to prepare for their date. Not realizing how rusty she had become with the boys, getting them to bed was more of a job than she remembered.

Hallie made it to the restaurant on time looking for Sam to no avail.

“Name?” The hostess asked.

“I’m Hallie, it’s for Dalton, the reservation is under Samantha Dalton.”

“Ok miss Hallie, right this way.”

The host took her back to her table and got her situated. Around that time Amy finally made it to the restaurant and waited for the Host.

“Name?” He asked.

Before Amy could respond, A voice behind her spoke up,

“Dalton, reservation for two. Hello love.” Sam said kissing Amy’s cheek.

“Uhhhh.” Amy responded shook.

“Right this way....” The host said confused. He could have sworn he just set the table for this girl.

Hallie, in a rush to get to the restaurant, forgot to use the restroom so she hurried off before Sam got there.

On her way back from the restroom a strong pair of delicate hands grabbed her and pulled her into a booth.

“Ah there you are my love.” Kamilah said kissing Hallie on the lips.

“Ummmmm.” Hallie mumbled confused.

The host, escorting Sam and Amy to their table passed by Kamilah and Hallie. Each girl seeing double and their respected lover.

“Kamilah!” Amy said jerking away from Sam and leaping for her queen.

“Sam!” Hallie yelled stumbling out of the booth towards her lover.

“Kamilah!?” Sam squealed in surprise.

“Sam?!” Kamilah said equally surprised.

Amy noticed Hallie fully and began to freak. The others noticing exactly why. Hallie stood frozen as Amy timidly approached her and the two began mimicking each other.

“Identical.” Kamilah started.

“Twins?” Sam finished.

“Habibti? You never mentioned you had a twin?” Kamilah asked concerned.

“I...I didn’t know I had a twin? I can’t? I’m an only child.” Amy replied.

“What...what is your name?” Amy asked.

“Hallie...Hallie Schuyler.”

“Oh that explains it. She just looks like me. See Kami? She has a different last name.” Amy said relieved and peppy. The others just sighing and rolling their eyes.

Kamilah just shook her head, Amy could be...simple minded sometimes.

“Ames, just because she has a different last name, doesn’t mean she isn’t your twin. Please, join us?” Kamilah asked.

Sam and Hallie reluctantly joined the other couple and Hallie and Amy couldn’t stop staring at each other.

“This is weird.” Sam whispered talking to Kamilah.

“What are the odds?”

“So if you’re my sister? Why am I just now finding you?” Hallie asked.

“Idk...separated at birth?” Amy thought.

The two explained their parents and childhood, it had to be the reason.

“Kami?” Amy started. “Could she be like us? Like me?”

Kamilah shrugged, “Only one way to find out.”

Sam looked at the two confused, “What do you mean, like you?”

Amy placed her hands on Hallie’s head and tried to read her mind...nothing. She was 100% human.

“I don’t understand?!” Amy hissed.

“What is she doing?” Hallie asked.

“We are...Vampires.” Kamilah eased into it. Amy is a physic one.”

Hallie and Sam began to panic but Kamilah and Amy reaussured them it was alright.

“Amy, tell me more about your parents?” Hallie asked easing the tension.

Amy went into depth about her family and memories. Explaining more about her mother and her rough childhood when it struck her, there was Hallie.

“I remember you....” Amy began to tear up. “Mom, she gave you up. She knew what I was, she knew what she was. It was her only option to keep you safe.”

It was odd and very sudden, but Hallie knew it as soon as Amy said it. She believed it.

“Hallie? Are you alright?” Sam asked.

“I have a sister....A TWIN SISTER!” Hallie cheered grabbing Amy for a hug.

And the weird twin telepathy thing kicked into overdrive, Amy and Hallie squealing in excitement, Sam and Kamilah began to dread the outcome of this.

“Here...” Kamilah said sliding a fresh cocktail to Sam. “You’re gonna need it.”

To Be Continued

[popcorn-hero]

The Tales of the Todorokis

Acknowledging character development and writing character development is not and making excuses for ones crimes.

Disclaimer: I read, I interpret, I express. This is a long post filled with images. Also probably some horrible grammar

Apologizing: Apologizing is  acknowledging ones faults and vowing to never commit the same mistakes. What has happened has happened. Nothing can change the past or the effect it had. What you do now, does not change or erase the past, but it helps guide a path of healing for the future. It can be the start of change and morphing into a better person. BUT, only if that person truly means it.

Apologies is not making an excuse for yourself.

Forgiveness: Forgiveness can be rightfully given, or not. It can be a tricky thing to understand at times. Forgiveness doesn’t remove the pain. Forgiveness doesn’t erase the memories. But for some people, forgiveness is a key to freedom, for inner peace. For other people, forgiveness doesn’t offer them that, and that's fine too.

We are not monoliths, we are individual people, with individual brains, with individual emotions, with experiences that affects us as individuals. Our stories might overlap - they might even be identical, but how we process it may not be.

I don’t like this narrative I’ve been seeing recently in the fandom of Horikoshi being an abuse apologist. I think Horikoshi is challenging us and its working. 

The Tales of the Todoroki’s: Enji, Rei, Touya, Fuyumi, Natsuo, Shoto

6 people

6 perspectives

6 stories

1 truth

Each viewpoint and each experience from everyone is very important in putting the pieces together (yes, even Enji). In fact, I think it was important to have Enjis viewpoint to the situation because it was such a contrast to what we’ve heard and seen from everyone else. In Enjis mind, he truly thought everyone was complaisant. He saw nothing wrong with attempting to live vicariously through his kids. In the same breath he expresses contempt for this children, its also laced with disappointment

He speaks of Rei as though she was consensual, but we know he essentially used her a valuable Mare and hurt her as well.

His treatment of Rei cannot be erased, justified, or forgotten. It happened. We as the audience are suppose to carry that in our minds because we are reading a story about Heroes. This challenges us to understand that heroic actions is not what a hero makes.

There are cops who (most of them tbh) that become cops simply for the power dynamic, not because they desire to protect. A lot of cops abuse their spouse.

 Rei: We are only introduced to her through the lowest point of her life and we have no insight on how Enji acquired her (yeah that sound harsh, but isn’t that what happened) nor her domestic life with him. What we know of her are scenes of her pain, and I think thats relevant enough. She may have had some “good” moments out of her situation, but she was still a mouse trapped in a lions den. Good days do not erase her state. Thats why this panel, was so odd to me 

Because it implies that Rei was complicit in having kids even though we as the audience understand that he basically brought her for that single purpose. Now note, this is coming from Enjs mouth, not hers so I can’t sit her be like “oh yeah she was fine with everything”

To me, this is simply Enjis projection because what was Rei honestly going to do? Say no? But who’s to say that she didn’t want Touya to be lonely? Idk, that panel was too wishy washy for me.

Moving on

She replies to Natsuo by saying that's not true

Its not in his defense like how Natsuo claimed. Rei never states that she forgives him, and we can see she is still on her journey of healing when she mentions shes still a bit scared of him. However, she acknowledges his acts as stepping stone for his own path of atonement.

If she does come to forgive him later in the story, thats her decision (Horikoshi actually lol). If she doesn’t, that her decision. 

Natsuo: 

The only insight from Natsuo is his resentment towards his father with what happened to Touya and the hurt of their mother. It is revealed later that Natsuo was Touya confidant in the house (I’ll get into that when I talk about Touya).

But He doesn’t forgive him....or hes not at that stage yet

When endeavor saves him from the villain, we are able to see Natsuos raw thoughts:

He’s conflicted: He wants to maintain the peace, but he can’t deny how he feels.

Natsuo felt like he had to compromise his feelings, and that shouldn’t be fair. Even thought he is the middle child, I feel like he took on the presence of the big brother and wanted to protect his siblings. But when you have a man like Enji as your father and you know how he is.....standing up to him as a child is terrifying

So when Enji says this

I’m like: DUH! Of course he would feel like that

But I’m taking this scene has Enji recognizing how he made Natsuo feel as a child which showcases. he owns up to the fact that he pushed Touya to the edge.

Yet with all that said, hes not suppose to forget. Hes not suppose to suppress how he feels. And even at his age, that child inside him still hurt and was never offered a chance to properly heal. I know what that feels like.

Natsuo must figure out what he needs to do to find peace - however that may be.

Fuyumi :

We don’t have much insight to Fuyumi and I’m sure  her experience is completely different from her brothers. One, because she was a girl and Enji is misogynistic, I doubt he gave her any type of attention as a father figure especially since she only inherited her moms quirk. I don’t recall  signs of physically abuse on Fuyumi and (Natsuo), but there probably was demeaning behavior at some point. Just being in that environment and seeing their sibling subjected to that, negatively impact her however 

But with Fuyumi, she is trying to move on

I think Fuyumi is on her path of forgiving her father -  thats her choice to make to find peace for her experience.  After expressing her desire  to move on as a family, she ask Shoto how he feels....

Oh my sweet prince Shoto: 

Shoto has a lot of baggage and being one of the main protagonist, we get a more in depth experience on his relationship with is father. I’m not going to go into too much detail because we all know he detested his father. I’m mainly going to focus on this middle ground that I find him at.

In the panels above he mentions having grudges and how it clouds the mind. Thats a toxic feeling to carry with you, especially when you’re trying to be a hero. He recognized that, and he’s been working on fixing that. Even his mother had to forgive herself towards what she did to him.

Shoto is not here to forgive Enji, hes here to forgive himself

What I mean by that is the fact that Shoto experienced self-hate. He hated a part of who was, how he looked, where he came from.  He had no control of his childhood, but he now has control of his future. At the sports festival, that was Shotos first step towards finding his healing. It wasn’t about Enji apologizing to him. It was about him.

And now look at him, he’s more social, more expressive, more powerful once he began to love himself. He got there on his own and with the support of his friends.

It doesn’t change what happened to him, and it doesn’t erase his feelings However, it gave him control over himself.

This is almost the same position Natsuo is in. He hasn’t seen anything (yet) for himself that warrants him to forgive his father. Maybe we will see it in these later chapters... maybe we wont.

Thats his decision

And last: Touya

Touya, touya, touya touya......

I honestly don’t know how to tackle his situation, but shoot me

From this memory (by Enji), Touya appears...enthusiastic. He appeared that he wanted to train with his father. 

And I think this is where things went wrong in his rearing. He was GROOMED .

Enji, being who he was, probably placed the ideas in Touya head of great success, importance, power, fame, ect. These things sound good to a child, and being the only child at the time, he had all his fathers attention. But as he got older and his quirk became incompatible, things started change.

Even before his quirk no longer became compatible for him, Enji still didn't see Touya as his ideal child, but he accepted it. Touya looks to be about 6 here meaning Shoto wasnt born yet or an infant.

 Going by the ages given for Shoto, Fuyumi, and Natsuo I’m going to state that 

Touya was 13 when he staged his death

Fuyumi was 11, Natsuo was 8, and Shoto was 5 and thats when we are introduced into in abuse.

So there is a 8 year window between Touya shift in his relationship with his father and the start of Shoto gaining his quirk.

That is a missing puzzle piece, and I can only speculate what happened in that time period to drive Touya to his mental breaking point and what his father did or, didn’t do for him.

Here, there is more white in his hair and he looks to be maybe 10? And this is when he starts to question his existence.

I can’t say all that Touya went through from the time Shoto was born to his faked death. 

I think Touya suffered from feeling abandoned by his father father, the feelings of being a failure because of these ideals of greatness only to be sideline. That he was just a placeholder like the rest of his sibling and not worthy to work along his fathers side.

I don’t think he faced the same treatment from his father as Shoto did.  I think he became blinded by approval and pushed himself to his limits to compete for Enji attention, He probably developed depression, anxiety, and a lot stressors as he became more and more incompatible with his quirk

And I think thats why there is the hate for Shoto because he feels like he took away his purpose ( which has nothing to do with Shoto but everything to do with Enjis grooming)

We know Touya is absolutely not on the scale of ever forgiving his father for what he did. For him to sit there and watch his father on TV and proclaim to be a hero when he knew what went on behind closed doors, it can drive him towards wanting to retaliate. 

His story showcases damages of a broken child. Where Shouto found liberation, Touya remained bound to the ambers Enji left on his worth and lies on being a hero.

Not everything can be fixed, and once a crack forms, it will continue to spread until it shatters.

In conclusion

The Tale of The Todorokis is not to serve as excusing abuse. Its a showcase of how 1 man can affect the lives of many people in different ways. It is a tale of moving forward, finding peace, and gaining control over your own person. 

Enji knows he can’t snap his figures and all will be well.  Though I think some actions he could have done was to take it upon himself to address the country, come clean,  and maybe retire as a hero, but he’s not a perfect character.

But I’ll take what I can get. Enji knows his place, he knows what he has done.

Happiness to his family is absence

Its there space

And there nothing more better he can do than that.

[pappydaddy]

I Wanna Know What It’s Like (f.w.)

A/N: So, I am going to start making new Masterlists and today I was supposed to start them, but I’ve had this idea for an imagine in my head for weeks now so I am writing it instead. I also couldn’t choose who to write this for so I’m doing multiple variations of this for different characters and stuff. I decided to do Fred first bc my other Fred imagine was really sad so this is a way to make up for that unnecessary sadness.

I am also testing out a new scene divider, idk if I’ll like it, but we’ll see! This is a repost bc the tags weren’t working the first time a posted which was upsetting and I really hope that they work this time. This is another repost (last one for a while if this one doesn’t get any feedback or the tags don’t work). 

Anyway, Enjoy!

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Gryffindor!Reader  

Fandom: Harry Potter

Inspo: The Tik Tok audio for Let’s Be Friends by Emily Osment, links to the song below so you don’t have to search for it like I had to 😂

                  - The song the Tik Tok audio is cut from                   - Slowed version I found and really like

Warnings: None except making out I guess. Some NSFW hints and thoughts. Like downright sinful thoughts. Hints towards a kinky reader? (Is that even a warning? And is wanting to be completely railed a kink? Is it?)

masterlist | taglist | wips | navigation - my gif -

Y/n couldn’t seem to pull her eyes from the red-head seated next to his identical twin. The pair of them sitting farther down the Gryffindor table than Y/n and her friends. The hall was silent as all the students were working on their essays, being monitored by Snape, but the greasy Potions Master nor the rules silenced the twins - them having found a loophole that let them annoy the largely hated Professor. There was a rule about no talking, but he couldn’t punish them if they never spoke actual words, could he? From where she sat, she could hear their loud grunts and hums from their wordless conversation with each other.

She didn’t understand the sudden fascination with the Weasley boy. It confused her since when she had left Hogwarts last year, she found him annoying, but alas, once she laid eyes on him for the first time this year at the Welcoming Feast, something had changed. She definitely couldn’t pin-point it to save her soul. Maybe it was the fact that he had grown his hair out, but then she’d also be attracted to his twin since he had done the same. Could it have been that she finally developed her attraction to bad boys? Was she looking to spice up her dating life since her past boyfriends had been quite lackluster with their golden-boy attitudes? Whatever it was, it made her question her sanity since this was Fred Weasley she was talking about. The same boy who decided it would be funny to throw a large Dungbomb into her dorm in First Year. She had stunk for a good two weeks along with the only other girl that was in her room at the time.

“L/n,” The monotone drawl of Snape made her feel like someone had just dumped a bucket of ice water over her - which she was thankful for since she could sense her thoughts for the red-head were about to take a steamier turn. Gulping, she slowly turned her head to look at the scowling man donned in black. “I suspect that you’re done your essay already since you certainly do not look like you’re working on it anymore. Didn’t take you to be too keen about potions based on your unsuccessful potion brewing.” His voice was slow and sharp, showing that he was not in the mood to even be pleasant to Gryffindors.

“Almost, sir. Just a bit distracted. Sorry, Professor.” She shrunk under his hardening glare, realizing that he probably didn’t want her to answer his statement.

“Five points from Gryffindor for talking, L/n.” Snape sneered making Y/n’s jaw fall in shock. Her eyes stared up at him in disbelief. He was the one who talked to her first!

“But I was just-”

“Another five points from Gryffindor, need I take more?” Snape asked in a threatening tone, his frame seeming to grow and tower over the girl, intimidating her. She gulped, shaking her head nervously, remaining silent. She might not be someone who thought things through before acting, but she certainly did learn from her mistakes - usually after the second time. With a nod and a flick of his long cloak, Snape stalked along the table, glaring at the Weasley twins as they continued on with their nonsense, pushing his buttons as he waited for the moment one of them slipped up. Huffing as she casted one last glance towards Fred, she couldn’t help letting the question slip through her lips.

“When did he get hot?” Her eyes widened when she realized she muttered the words out loud. Her friends looked up from their own essays, snickering at the red-faced Gryffindor. A few other Gryffindors looked up at the girl in confusion, but she noticed that her quiet voice hadn’t reached the students near the Twins. She let out the breath she held, thinking that she was safe from embarrassment from Fred hearing and Snape hearing, but her false sense of security was yanked out from under her.

“Another five points from Gryffindor, Miss L/n!” She cringed, peeking up to see Snape glaring at her from the middle of the Great Hall. A groan emitted from her before her forehead fell against where she thought her pile of parchment and books were only for it to thud against the wooden table harshly. She didn’t react, only hissing and scrunching her face in pain but otherwise keeping her head down.

_____________________________________________________________________

Saturday was the day of relaxation. Where you ignore all your problems like the load of homework you had due on Monday. The day was designed for this, putting everything off and worrying about it on Sunday when you had a pile of work that needed to be done in the single day. Y/n was the queen of blissful Saturday ignorance which is why it was so surprising to see her sitting outside, staring blankly at the lake (at least they thought it was the lake) as she clearly worried about something. Her friends, in turn, ended up breaking their Saturday tradition to worry about their friend.

In reality, Y/n wasn’t staring at a wall and she really wasn’t worried about anything. As her and her friends sat under the shade of a large tree, the Weasley Twins were tossing something into the lake. She was sure they were up to something, but that wasn’t on her mind. What was on her mind was the fact that she was still trying to figure out why she liked Fred Weasley. She had figured her feelings for the boy when she saw him flirting with some random Ravenclaw Prefect to create a distraction for George to slip past the Prefect and place their product in her bag that sat on the floor by her feet. Before realizing what the two masterminds had plotted, she felt a wave of unfamiliar anger flaring in the pit of her stomach - something she later diagnosed as jealously.

Her thoughts were definitely clouded with steamy thoughts that could be the contents of a dirty movie. As her eyes scanned over the tall boy standing at the shore of the lake, laughing mischievously with his twin, she couldn’t help but wonder if he was different than her past experiences. He was a flirt, he talked a big game, but when it got down to it, did he really know how to please her? Did he know how to make her scream louder than she ever has? Would he be scared to hurt her or would he not think twice to push her into the mattress and completely destroy her? “Y/n!” Her friend shoved her, making her almost topple over. Snapping her once glazed-over eyes to her friend, she saw her friend group blinking at her expectantly.

“What,” She asked, clearing her throat when her words came out too high to be played off as normal. The friend that had pushed her shared a concerned look with the others before looking back at the wide-eyed girl whose cheeks had become tinted with pink when she retraced her thoughts. “What do you want Cami?”

“We were talking about Cedric and asked you a question-” Another friend, Alyssa, popped into the conversation. Cedric, Hogwarts Heartthrob and Golden-boy. When Y/n broke up with Roger Davis, they were sure her and Cedric would pair up, they were the most attractive students at Hogwarts, they would be the power couple - it must have been destined. Y/n was even convinced that they would end up dating this year, but once she caught sight of Fred, that all went out the window. She wasn’t entirely convinced that it was entirely the oldest twin’s doing since when Y/n saw Cedric on the platform before boarding the train, she questioned what all the fawning was about. Sure, he was attractive, but he was too good. If she had dated him, she’d probably end up bored of the relationship just like the others.

“Repeated it ten times, too.” Her Hufflepuff friend, Sophie, spoke up.

“We wanted to know when you guys were going to get together? Word has it, Cho and him have been talking, you might want to jump on him when you have a chance! Ask him to the Yule Ball!” Cami regained control of the conversation. Y/n shrugged, opening her mouth to speak, but was interrupted by her other friend pointing off towards the lake.

“Look! Janet Green is going to ask Fred to the Yule Ball,” Alyssa exclaimed in a hushed, gossipy voice. Y/n instantly looked towards the lake to see the same Ravenclaw Prefect Fred flirted with approaching the snickering twins. “I heard she’s been plucking up the courage for days. Poor girl, hope he says yes. It’d be awfully embarrassing to be turned down after it’s all she’s been talking about!” She gushed in a fake sympathetic tone. She lived for drama and gossip, no matter what Fred answered, it’d be good for her since she’d be able to spread the news.

The group watched, Y/n hoping that Fred would say no. Janet started to talk, nervously playing with the ring on her pointer finger as she talked to him, George watching with a playful smirk on his face still. Y/n took in the younger twin’s form, seeing his shoulders shaking ever so slightly with smothered laughter, the smirk on his face saying that he knew the answer his brother was going to give. Y/n furrowed her brows as he obviously enjoyed the situation his brother was being placed in. “I can’t watch this-” Sophie gasped, being cut off.

“Be quiet, they’ll know we’re watching!” Alyssa hissed at her, whacking her with the muggle magazine her mother sent her. The snap of the magazine resulted in George flicking his eyes up to the group, all of their eyes widening, but his smirk just grew more and they could clearly see a sparkle in his eyes when he noticed Y/n staring intently down at the group. They could all see that his eyes stayed on her for a solid second, singling her out before he sent her a knowing wink before he looked back at his stammering twin.

“That,” Sophie breathed out. “Did not go well, poor girl.” She finished with a real sympathetic sigh.

“Yeah,” Alyssa let out a fake sigh before smiling brightly. “I’ve got to go tell Alicia Spinnet, she owes me ten sickles!” And with that, she scrambled up and was running towards the castle.

“Alyssa, no! You’ll embarrass the poor girl further!” Sophie gasped, chasing after her Gryffindor friend. Cami watched the two runoff, but Y/n couldn’t be bothered with them. She was too busy trying to decode what had just happened. From her thoughts to George’s wink. It was all like a secret code. She watched closely as George poked fun at Fred once the embarrassed Ravenclaw was far enough away. She hummed, noticing George trying to discretely point towards her as he tried to convince Fred of something. She could see Fred’s hair blowing slightly, the flaming hair looking smooth. Suddenly, her mind was clouded once again, imagining how it feels to have him press her up against a wall, her legs wrapped around his waist, their lips locked together in a heated kiss, their tongues invading each other’s mouth, her fingers tangled in the locks of fire-

“What are you doing, Y/n,” Cami asked, snapping her out of her daydream. She looked over at her friend to see her with furrowed brows. “You were,” She paused, looking disturbed by the next word she was going to say. “Moaning, I think?” She wasn’t even sure what Y/n was doing. Y/n would have normally flushed in embarrassment, but it seemed like her mind had a different plan. She wanted to know what the big deal about Fred Weasley was about. There must be something about him that she wanted, why else would she be plagued with these curiosities? She can’t even look at the guy without suddenly wondering something about him. She wanted to know how his lips tasted, to know if his hair was soft, if her fingers could glide right through his locks without getting caught on any tangles. She wanted to know everything her mind was wondering.

“I’m going to go get answers, that’s what.” She told her friend, making Cami more confused as she stood up, her eyes on Fred and George. George, seeing that Y/n was storming her way over, looking like she was on a mission quickly told his brother who seemed to freeze before turning around to see that his brother was telling the truth. After a second of shock, he plastered his normal smirk on his lips, but Y/n could see the nervousness in his eyes. She had studied that smirk since the beginning of the year after all.

Cami watched in shock and confusion as her friend marched up to Fred, standing in front of him. The tall boy looked down at her, his smirk still on his face (looking normal to her) as Y/n craned her neck to look at his face. “Hey, Fred.” Y/n smiled, completely unsure of how she was doing this. Her inner self was having a complete meltdown, her brain being overridden with confidence.

“Hello, Y/n.” He perked an eyebrow at the girl, feeling her confidence rolling from her, a stark difference from Janet a mere few minutes ago. She hummed, a smirk that she didn’t even know she could produce stretching onto her face. It was like she wasn’t even in control of her body, she was being driven by her sheer attraction to the boy standing in front of her.

“Let’s be friends so we can make out,” She came right out with it, Fred’s smirk falling as he nearly choked on his own spit, taken back by her statement. “You’re hot, I wanna know what it’d be like. We can go to the Yule Ball, sneak away to make out in a dark hallway,” She shrugged, her eyes glistening with the normal flirtatious sparkle Fred held in his. “Don’t you wanna know what it’d be like to make out with someone who has only been with good guys? Show me the wild side?” She stepped closer to him, her hand skimming his hip as she did so, her hip bone hitting just below his hip due to the height difference.

Fred was silent, his pupils completely blown as he processed what was going on. Her confidence faltered slightly, but she then remembered all the flirting tips she had read in Alyssa’s magazines. Walk away, leave them wanting more. She picked the dropped confidence up, adding more onto the surge she was miraculously given somehow. “If you want to take me up on the offer, you know where to find me.” She rolled up onto the balls of her feet, pressing a soft kiss to the skin close to Fred’s mouth while still being able to say it was the cheek before spinning around and sauntering back towards stunned Cami. It took everything in her to fight against her inner self that wanted to die right there not to drop the smirk, hoping that he’d come after her once he got over his shock.

The hand wrapping around her wrist didn’t surprise her, she almost knew it was coming. In a swift movement, she was whirled back around, facing Fred who panted slightly, a flirty smirk on his face as he gazed down at her. “I think I’ll take the offer,” He hummed, his eyes dropping down to look at her lips, his tongue swiping over his bottom lip hungrily. “You and me, the Yule Ball and a dark hallway, see you then.” He pressed a kiss to the very corner of her lips, regaining his confidence before releasing her wrist and walking back towards the lake where his brother smiled proudly. She watched him, the corners of her lips feeling the aftershocks of having his lips touch her. Cami walked up to stand beside her, looking at Fred and George as well.

“Guess you’re gonna need to get a really sexy dress now,” She commented, nodding absentmindedly. Y/n hummed in agreement, stunned that it had worked and that she had actually just did that. “Now I know why you’re a Gryffindor,” She added on before grabbing Y/n’s arm and dragging her back to the castle. “Come on, we need to make a list for possible dresses and Alyssa owes me the ten sickles Alicia is giving her.”

[musical-chick-13]

And Theon bc I love him

WHAT A COINCIDENCE I LOVE HIM TOO (this answer is gonna be a combination of books and show)

Send me a character and I’ll tell you the following:

• Did they live up to their potential? / In what ways was their potential unachieved?

-I would say yes. The only negative I have about his general arc is his death (which, see below). But Theon from the very beginning was, though not a particularly nice person, still relatable. Feeling othered, wanting to be accepted by an immediate environment that doesn’t accept you, isolated from and ostracized by your family, and the tension that comes between serving the different types of familial relationships in your life. Theon has no idea who he is, tossed aside by his blood family for not growing up with them and being “soft,” aka sort-of moral and having emotions that aren’t selfish rage or smugness (which, yep, that second part is a mood, see: my entire childhood and how no one wanted to be around an “emotional” “soft” child). And from there, he spirals out of control in a way that, while certainly not admirable by any stretch of the imagination, is still understandable in the context of the narrative and his characterization. And from there, after going through hell and quite literally losing himself (even to the point of straight-up denying rescue), he builds himself back up gradually, to the point where he expressed extreme regret for what he’s done, helps an innocent woman escape a truly horrifying situation, acknowledges that his family is generally garbage, and (in-show b/c again books aren’t finished), helping to restore his sister to power, rescuing her after his PTSD relapses while confronting Euron, and ultimately opting to protect the Starks come hell or high water in order to genuinely atone for what he’s done. He is no longer conflicted because he wants to do the right thing, and that right thing is defending the kingdom from the White Walkers and making sure Sansa and Bran are safe. And it’s no longer about fulfilling a duty or finding a family to fill the void. Because now he has found himself. I will contend that Theon has one of the best, most nuanced, most organic redemption arcs of all time. I will forever be grateful that I got to see that piece of storytelling unfold.

Although, I would love to know what he thought of Dany. A missed opportunity, that.

• How they negatively and positively affected the story.

-Positive: His arc of identity and finding where your loyalties lie ties into the overall theme of “How do you find yourself in a world where goodness, authenticity, and honesty are often punished and increasingly rare?” And it proves that governmental politics aren’t the only defining factors in decisions: familial politics can be just as difficult and dangerous, which adds yet another rich, complicated layer to the overall story. He has a genuine, honest-to-Drowned-God redemption arc, which is...not really present anywhere else in the story (no, Jaime is not on a Redemption Quest, I will die on this hill). But I think the biggest draw of Theon’s presence is that it deconstructs the whole “Character Revenge Fantasy” idea. He does bad things. We want him to be punished. But not like that. No one deserves that. How far is too far? What does retribution really look like? Given how easily that idea can be abused and go off the rails, is retribution even something to strive for? What is the point of using extreme violence/torture/mutilation/breaking someone’s psyche when it doesn’t really accomplish anything? Isn’t atonement and genuine justice a better option? It certainly was for Theon. He could only piece himself back together and do anything meaningful once he was out of his abusive environment. All of these are imporant questions that are posed by his existence in the narrative.

-Negative: Idk if I have much to say here. My biggest problem is his death (see below), but that’s not really a negative story effect so much as...being disappointing and narratively irrelevant. I gotta say, his introduction via his sister was...really weird. I genuinely have no idea why GRRM wrote that. It never came up again or had any kind of narrative ramifications and kind of cast a strange, uncomfortable light on his relationship with Asha/Yara for the remainder of the story. I can ignore and enjoy their later relationship it if I don’t think about it too hard, though, so I guess I’ll chalk it up to GRRM having a Bad Idea.

• What my favorite arc for them is.

-All of it?? Theon’s journey is kind of...one big arc, which is why I think it works so well. He has this overarching redemption plot which spans the entire series and informs every decision he makes (for good or for bad, depending on where in the aforementioned journey he is). The redemption arc isn’t bogged down with side plots or other pieces of narrative clutter, meaning it has time to grow and, thus, be gradual and realistic. If I had to choose a specific point, it’s probably when he tries to reintegrate back into society via supporting Yara. Gaining the Iron Islands’ support for her ruling, spiriting away with Euron’s fleet, and ultimately rescuing his sister after her capture. He can’t just go back into society. He’s scared. He has really bad PTSD. But he recognizes that putting his home in good hands is something bigger than just him because it’s Yara’s home, too. I just...I really love family relationships, y’all.

• What I think of their ending.

-I’m not really sure how I feel about this one. I get that the series is GrimDark™ and that people who make the right choice and fight for good die all the time, but Theon dying just felt...wrong. To me.

And, like...I get it. It makes sense to parallel his original descent into villainy (cemented by executing those two boys and pretending they were Bran and Rickon) with him dying to protect Bran himself. It ties into the whole very common trope of completing a full redemption arc by committing a completely selfless act at great personal cost. It’s kind of like the whole Missy thing in Doctor Who (which...hoo boy, that post is coming, make no mistake), where selfishness is directly opposed by making the ultimate sacrifice with no motivation for personal gain. And the fact that the last words he ever heard were “You’re a good man?” I cannot even begin to describe how much that makes me sob. But...honestly, I’m really tired of this idea that redemption has to end in death in order to be achieved or “complete.” I think it’s much more poignant to have a redeemed character live to help build a better world. Because what’s the point of telling people to be better if the “reward” is death? No one’s going to want to reform themselves if they think that’ll be the result.

I think the thing that Bugs Me™ the most is that Theon never really got to have a moment of peace when he was alive. Sansa gained the North’s love and at least had a secure childhood. Ned and Cat were happily married for years. Arya had parents who loved her and a good relationship with Jon. Jon fell in love with Ygritte and found his Night Watch Bros, and Robb (in show verse) had some very happy moments with Talisa. Davos put great stock in what he considered fulfilling friendships with Stannis and Shireen; Brienne was treated respectfully by Renly, Catelyn, and Sansa; Missandei and Grey Worm had each other and their friendship with Dany, who herself had many personal successes in her quest for the Iron Throne and saw the death of her abusive brother. Cersei even had moments with Jaime (who himself had several notable military victories and at least some time with Myrcella, as well as being gladly and deeply in love, however dysfunctional that love was), times when she successfully fought off enemies (including her dad), and some sweet moments with Tommen, as well as a huge victory via blown-up sept at the end of season 6. Theon was treated as a second-class family member by the Starks his whole life by being “traded” to them as a condition of war resolution AS A BABY, is immediately disparaged and mistreated by his immediate family when he tries to return to them, makes terrible decisions that almost cost him his conscience completely, is brutally tortured by Ramsay, is on the run with his sister from Euron almost immediately after, and has a PTSD attack that ultimatly results in him having to launch a rescue mission. And then he fights ice zombies. And then he dies. He never really...got to be happy at all? There was never any kind of “win” for him. Not even survival. The narrative couldn’t even give him that.

TLDR: Theon’s death seemed less shock-value-y than others (like, for example, Shireen or Missandei or, heck, Melisandre even), and it isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever seen. It’s narratively-informed and it makes sense as an emotional through-line, but, ultimately, Redemption Cemented By Selfless Death is a tired trope, and I honestly thought this story (which...you know...serves as a deconstruction of common fantasy tropes/book tropes in general) was better than that.

• When I wish they had died. / If I think they should’ve died.

-So here’s where we get personal™ kids.

So, it’s no secret that I am...severely mentally ill. I’ve talked about expression/presentation of mental illness in regard to Cersei a lot on this blog, and how that (as paradoxical as it may seem) helped bring a sense of comfort and emotional resonance to me. Theon, post-Ramsay, has, I think, a very clear case of PTSD. Theon is one of the few characters I’ve seen where his mental illness isn’t the cause of the bad, violent, dangerous choices he makes. It only takes root after he has made the decision and conscious effort to better himself, and it, rather than demonizing him, serve to humanize him. His trauma didn’t define him. And although a PTSD attack led to him unintentionally losing Yara to Euron’s capture, he makes every effort to rescue her, a goal he does end up achieving. It is so rare I get to see a character who goes through these things, successfully fight them and come out with positive qualities at the end. Like...switching topics a bit here, Jaime going back to King’s Landing to (try to) escape and ultimately die with Cersei made sense to me because, as Jaime says, he is a hateful man. He never made much of an honest effort to be anything else. And he never truly wanted to be good; he just wanted to be liked. He wanted to adopt some personality that would make him feel less disconnected from the rest of the world. But Theon...genuinely feels remorse for everything he’s done. He makes a concerted effort to do everything in his power to improve the lives of people he believes are good and deserve to be safe. So, just...killing him off in a Completely Selfless Sacrifice (like...you know how a lot of mentally ill people put themselves through suffering-like OCD rituals, bottling feelings, self-harm, even suicide-in a misplaced attempt to “help” or “protect other people”) seemed antithetical to everything we saw of his arc.

Ultimately, with such a humanizing, empathetic portrayal of trauma and mental health struggles, seeing Theon be killed off just...pissed me off. I am so tired of seeing mentally ill characters die. I really want to believe that I can live through and thrive in spite of the things that afflict me, and I get example after example of characters not being allowed to do that. It feels awful, quite frankly. And it makes hope that much harder. 

I also just feel like...there was nothing the story gained from his death? I get the thematic parallels as mentioned earlier, but it didn’t really move the story forward in any significant way. It didn’t motivate other characters to do anything, it had no political ramifications, it didn’t serve to contribute to any kind of happy ending or commentary on society, it just...was sad. Again, I thought this story was better than that.

[dragimal]

so I just watched Annihilation again and I have some thoughts

to start off, let me highlight a couple ways that Annihilation gets biology wrong

- the way Lena describes all the flowers growing near the hut, “To look at them you wouldn’t say that they are the same species… but they’re growing from the same branch structure… so it *has* to be the same species. It’s the same plant! It’s like they’re stuck in a continuous mutation.” ‘same species’ is, uh, not the conclusion I would first come to in that situation! if anything, I’d go for extreme symbiosis (like lichen-level) first, maybe some radiation-induced grafting of plants together (as this is something that can actually be done to certain plants irl, depending on compatibility). plant physiology/ecology is *notoriously* easy to fuck with without even going so far as the gene level to do so

- when Lena is analyzing the gator-shark, she says, “you can’t cross-breed between different species,” which is blatantly false lmao. I’m willing to believe she simply meant something like “between broad clades” and was just simplifying the idea for her non-bio teammates, but in context with all the other weird bio assumptions she makes, idk...

- the scene w/ the human-shaped plants, where Josie explains that the HOX genes were mutated to reflect those of humans.... that’s not how HOX genes work? 

see, on a basic level, HOX genes function like gene->part, NOT gene->shape. like, look at this diagram of fly HOX genes

each gene corresponds to a part/section of the fly, not any particular shape. thus, if a plant were to turn “human” (or vis-versa in Josie’s case) via *specifically* HOX mutation, the mutations would occur as parts reflecting parts. say, something like the stalk specifically forming the torso, the leaves specifically forming the fingers, the apical meristem forming the head, etc. (idk exact plant or human genetics, so don’t quote me on those *specific* reflections, but u get the gist), which might then be arranged into an approximate human shape

(and this isn’t even to *mention* the fact that genes end up coding for different things over time, so the exact same codes are simply going to *mean* something different when applied to the genes of different organisms. tho I’m far more willing to assume alien radiation interference on that front)

now these are little bits that have bugged me since I first saw the movie, but something always held me back from trying to ‘fix’ the worldbuilding (as I am want to do). it’s only recently that I realized that I never actually wanted to fix the worldbuilding-- I’ve always loved the worldbuilding just fine! it was the character explanations that were so wrong

like, these events could have been explained with a lil more plausibility. the flowers at the hut could’ve undergone some hyper-drive symbiosis, or even had any ability for horizontal gene transfer ramped up to goddamned 1000. the human-shaped plants could’ve taken on the shape of a human via some warped radiation that kept the environmental ‘imprint’ of a human from the area, and reflected it onto the plants via epigenetic tinkering. then Josie turning into a plant looked far more like rapid absorption by a plant parasite rather than her actually turning *into* a plant. these are explanations I immediately latched onto as a biologist myself-- explanations I feel any other biologist would at least *consider* long before just... completely misinterpreting the way HOX genes function

now I only really realized all this after watching Folding Ideas’ video abt Annihilation and Metaphor. u may be wondering: how did an analysis video abt metaphor help me reach this conclusion abt the more concrete worldbuilding (however much of it we can even take at face-value)? well the thing abt aliens is that, as far as we know, they could function on metaphor! 

aliens are literally unknowable by our current understanding of biology and life. the movie itself even blatantly states that, “It’s not like us… it’s unlike us.” we’re so entrenched in what life looks like on Earth, we have no goddamned CLUE what life could look like elsewhere, under different circumstances. this search for the true, distilled basics of life is at the heart of the field of Universal Biology, and why some researchers are actively trying to change the way they approach and think abt Earth life as well

thus, everything that the Shimmer causes is completely plausible to me, whether on a biological level, metaphysical level, or both! and specifically, the idea of an alien species having some control over metaphysical properties, beyond what we can sense or comprehend, is what leads me to believe that an alien species could, theoretically, work by “metaphor logic”

like, “reflection and refraction”. what would it mean for us to encounter an alien species can read our psychology and reflect us so intimately? that can recognize our *essence*, and apply our shape to other organisms, and vis-versa? it’s absolutely fascinating to consider

so with that in mind, when I criticize the bunk biology explanations, I totally get that this movie is far more metaphor than anything-- that when the movie says the flowers are “the same plant”, or implies that Josie “became” the plant, it’s working directly towards themes around self-identity and trauma and change

BUT here’s the thing. by not understanding actual biology enough to apply the explanations in functional ways w/ the themes, the movie misses a GOLDEN opportunity for an even MORE fitting, blatant metaphor

remember me explaining that HOX genes don’t equate to shape? it’s environmental factors that influence the shape of plants (and, honestly, the shape of organisms in general) via stressors like temperature, amount of light, wind speeds, etc. while these stressors can’t change the actual sequence/makeup of DNA in a given organism’s lifespan, they *can* change the ways genes are expressed in that lifespan—essentially how tightly/loosely DNA strands are packed and how easily transcriptions factors can subsequently read and further express those genes

these changes in how DNA is packaged/expressed can then, shockingly enough, be passed on to later generations. epigenetics studies this particular kind of inheritance, and has led further to the study of “inherited trauma”*, and how the stressors that a parent experiences may pass on genetically to their offspring to prepare them for those same stressors, whether the offspring actually encounter those stressors or not

(*NOTE: this field of study is still rather novel-- research into inherited trauma in humans in particular is still in its infancy, and while it’s yielded interesting results, it’s good to be critical and cautious of these results in the context of other environmental factors)

like. inherited trauma. I can’t fucking believe Annihilation missed that opportunity. and with how much ppl focus on the Lena/Kane’s potential “shimmery kids” you’d think this would be an even more obvious extension of the metaphor

anyways, Annihilation good movie. but neither Lena nor Josie passed 5th grade biology

[wasdname]

kakegurui anime vs manga pt. 2

ah, rei batsubami. she doesn’t exist in the manga, so every scene with her in the anime obviously isn’t in the manga. i think i will ignore the scenes with rei, since it’s anime-exclusive and everything else that happens isn’t really affected by rei being there or not. this post will mainly be comparing things that happened in the manga that didn’t happen in the anime for kakegurui xx (season 2). here’s a link to pt. 1 for season 1:

https://wasdname.tumblr.com/post/615241570260811776/kakegurui-anime-vs-manga-pt-1

LONG post with spoilers under the cut. season 2 had a lot more differences than season 1.

i’m going chronologically according to the anime. this might get confusing later, but bear with me. there’s a LOT to cover.

let’s jump into the very first two episodes of xx, when kirari announces there will be an election with the student council and the -bamis are introduced (ch. 34): 

the one person who would know about kirari’s family would be, obviously, sayaka, kirari’s secretary.  in the anime, sayaka has no clue who they are and kirari makes rei introduce them (more on that later).

after the introductions, we get reactions from each student council member. yuriko asks sayaka what she thinks about the situation:

and here we have the first major difference. in the manga, because tower of doors happened already, sayaka is much more confident and content both about herself and her relationship with kirari. she doesn’t need to understand everything that happens in kirari’s head, and sayaka knows that kirari doesn’t love or value sayaka any less because she doesn’t understand or for the things she chooses not to tell her. in the same way, kirari doesn’t understand sayaka all the time either, the difference being that kirari was never bothered by that as much as sayaka was bothered about it. SO, in the manga, we have a mutual understanding between the two characters now, thanks to tower of doors.

however, in the anime, sayaka reacts much differently and agrees with yuriko:

the fact that she doesn’t know who the -bami’s are also adds to pre-tower-of-doors sayaka’s growing list of “things kirari didn’t trust me enough to tell me”. they really want sayaka to suffer, huh?

i already wrote a bit about the meeting between kirari and terano (Ch. 36) in pt.1, so i’m going to skip over that to the next thing (but i’ll come back to this in a bit, it’s related, trust me), mary and ririka’s meeting (ch. 40). there’s a little bit of extra dialogue before mary takes off ririka’s mask:

it’s not that significant, but mary’s a little more animated in the manga, where in the anime she just kinda listens to what ririka’s saying without interrupting:

and then the mask comes off, and mary mentions ririka’s appearance:

“Kirari’s already exposed this face to the public. She doesn’t see it as any big secret.”

this line is interesting. i don’t know what to make of it yet. ririka is hiding her face, despite the fact that she claims kirari doesn’t care. so is ririka wearing the mask of her own volition? it’s easy to assume that kirari’s forcing ririka wear the mask, but that’s apparently not the case. i want to refer back to chapter 36 again, since it’s related here, the meeting between kirari, ririka, and terano:

notice how terano calls out ririka, not kirari, for doing this. why is that? was terano calling out ririka for being the one responsible for deciding when kirari and ririka switch identities, or was ririka just doing what kirari told her to and terano was calling ririka out for being kirari’s door-mat? or maybe i’m completely overthinking it (lol) and terano was just calling out ririka simply because she was the one in front of her? god i wish we could have seen how this scene played out.

we haven’t yet seen kirari and ririka interact at all, even in the manga. the mystery that is kirari and ririka’s relationship is one that i can’t wait to see unfold. 

onward. there’s extra insight into miri’s feelings in the manga during the gamble vs. mary and suzui, when one of the sisters has to lose (season 2 ep. 4, ch. 43):

poor miri :( in the anime, she kinda just does what miyo tells her and faints, skipping over her thoughts about her sister threatening her.

this one isn’t significant at all but i thought it was funny, the first rankings (Season 2 episode 5, Ch. 44):

#9, horo joumaru.... exists (lol). in the anime, he wasn’t even ranked, instead being replaced by sumika.

this is where things might get a little hectic, because there’s multiple things in this one episode that is spread out over multiple chapters in the manga, but bear with me. in the same episode, rin and sumika challenge kirari to a gamble. the anime cuts to the second half of the gamble, but in the manga, there’s a little bit more build up (ch. 50):

and then kirari immediately proceeds to tear apart rin’s lie. god, i love kirari so much

and it’s at this point where the manga and anime match up and kirari goes “all in” a million times.

next is the yumemite vs sumika gamble (still season 2 ep. 5, but ch.51). the reason the manga is ahead here is because the anime moves the greater good game to after this gamble, but it happens earlier in the manga (ch. 45-49). 

before the meeting, there was a scene that wasn’t included in the anime where mary and ririka are trying to find someone to gamble, which is why they weren’t in the pre-gamble meeting for the yumeko/yumemite vs sumika gamble. this is confusing because, chapter 46 (season 2 episode 5), the scene where mary decides she will work with ririka if she can win a gamble, didn’t happen yet. the anime kinda shoots itself in the foot here, and i’m still not sure why they decided to move things around they way they did, which resulted in the loss of this scene (maybe to build suspense for the greater good game? idk). i’m going to include it here, since it’s relevant, and we’ll go over the chapter 46 scene with mary/ririka in a bit when it happens in the anime. here’s the scene, at the very beginning of the yumeko/yumemite vs sumika meeting (ch.51):

“It’s a pity, but oh well...” the yumary ship is sailing

there was also a little bit more dialogue during the meeting where they’re discussing how to beat sumika that was kinda cute that didn’t make it into the anime:

“Let’s whip Kawaru Natari’s (i refer to her as sumika) butt!” “YEAH!” you dorks. i love them.

next is the scene with mary and ririka (back to ch. 46). mary’s a bit more aggressive in the manga:

 but the main difference in the manga is that ririka wants mary to make good on her promise earlier about punching her if she wins:

which is kinda intense. then mary yells at ririka which makes her cry (which doesn’t happen in the anime):

the end result is the same, though. mary wants ririka to gamble to prove herself, and if she wins....

we get this killer line from mary in the manga which didn’t make it in the anime, because the whole punching thing wasn’t even in the conversation:

mary implies that she’s going to punch kirari, since it’s heavily implied that ririka is under kirari’s orders to work with mary (but who knows? i don’t think ririka ever explicitly says who she’s working for, but correct me if i’m wrong, i could have missed it). man, i wish they kept this scene intact in the anime.

next, season 2, episode 6 (ch. 53), yumeko and yumemite vs sumika:

in the manga, when it’s revealed that yumemite broke her finger in an attempt to trick sumika with a reflex, the crowd disapproves. the anime doesn’t show this. this leads to a little extra dialouge:

sumika is actually impressed by yumemite’s resolve, and even encourages yumemite to continue to pursue her dreams. imo, this adds more to why yumemite doesn’t want to win against sumika in the last round, even though this small scene wasn’t exactly necessary for the point to get across (the anime cut it), it’s just nice that it’s there, because it makes the reader acknowledge sumika’s charm/manipulative-ness as well, and shows that yumemite is completely moved by sumika in every way. 

after round two, there’s another extra bit of dialogue that didn’t make it into the anime, which gives us a little more insight into what someone like sumika is doing here:

again, not that significant, but it’s there. she just wants to observe people, and what’s more “alluring” than her own crazy family? also, it doesn’t matter, but why are they naked?? i’m not complaining ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

it’s not that significant, but there’s another extra exchange between yumemite and sumika before the final round, when yumemite convinces herself she will lose in terms of talent no matter what: 

everything else that happens is essentially the same. 

mary is also shown checking up on this gamble in episode 5, at the beginning of all this:

in the same scene in the manga, she’s just walking with ririka behind her, without her phone:

good job, anime. they also show her checking her phone later in both the anime (at the very end of season 2 episode 6) and manga as well (ch. 55). it’s just nice because it shows that mary cares about her friends even if she can’t be there with them.

season 2 ep. 7 (Ch. 45-49), aka, the greater good gamble. there’s a little bit of dialogue the anime doesn’t show, about terano having to revise her plans (also, holy sh*t, when was terano expecting to defeat kirari?):

this isn’t too significant, but there’s a bit of extra dialogue about how many votes sumeragi earned and how she earned them when she’s conversing with manyuda that they didn’t show in the anime (ch.45):

there’s also a little bit of insight into sumeragi’s thoughts about terano and yumeko when they all get together for the greater good gamble, before they start playing (ch.45):

and again, some more extra pre-game stuff from ch.46, where we get to see a little more of ibara’s personality and sumeragi’s thoughts:

this isn’t that significant, but there’s a little extra dialogue from ibara and manyuda during the first turn when manyuda asks yumeko if she feels guilty about ruining people’s lives when she wins:

“You nervous? Want me to hold your hand? Hmmm?” ibara’s such a big goofball (lol)

there’s some more pages that include sumeragi’s thoughts during the game about the gameplay, but it’s not that significant. it’s mostly her saying things that we the readers already know, or her explaining the gameplay that’s happening. so i’m not going to include it since it doesn’t really give any insight into her character (it’s not that deep, really) and this post is getting long AF. 

after the first perfect round where everyone paid 5 coins in taxes, we get a very cute moment with ibara and manyuda in the manga that unfortunately didn’t make it into the anime (season 2 ep. 8, ch. 48):

i’m really liking ibara (lol).

that’s it, for everything that happened in the manga that didn’t happen in the anime. again, i excluded everything with rei, since she didn’t exist in the manga. i also excluded the scenes with sayaka that kinda build up to tower of doors (for example, season 2 ep. 8, at the very end where sayaka wants kirari to order her to get rid of terano) and the tower of doors arc itself (season 2 ep. 9-10), since it overlapped with season 1 stuff and i already covered that in my previous post. they didn’t change much in the tower of doors arc anyway (literally only the puzzles on the doors were a little different), it was very faithful to what happened in the manga (thank the lesbian godesses)

i encourage y’all to watch the anime if you’re curious about rei and how they integrated her into the story, as well as some extra scenes with kirari and sayaka (i mentioned one already, season 2 ep. 8 at the very end, there’s also two small scenes in episode 12 about rei) .

let me know if i missed anything, season 2 was difficult to do because it involved going back and forth through multiple chapters. if you’ve read all this, thanks for sticking with me til the end :)

[tiger-manya]

So, my Miraculous Ulysses AU.

I was genuinely surprised how many people responded to this (which is like… ten, but still). Thank you everyone, @furryhamlet in particular. I don’t know how serious I am about this, but does anybody really?

First, let us take a moment to establish the main similarities between Ulysses, a modernist masterpiece by James Joyce, and Miraculous Ladybug, a (debatably metamodern?) kids show:

puns;

the revolutionary new trope of main hero having a dead mother and the resulting father issues (never done before or after);

farts and bathroom humour (more prevalent in Ulysses, of course).

I think everything is quite clear.

And now, without further ado, Miraculous Ulysses AU:

It’s still Dublin, it’s still 1904, but now there’s also magic. And superheroes.

Stephen Dedalus has a black cat miraculous; Buck Mulligan has a bee miraculous; Simon Dedalus has a butterfly miraculous (not because I think it suits him, but because someone has to); Leopold Bloom is the guardian, but he doesn't do a very good job; Molly is often Ladybug, but it's not like she cares a lot.

All of them, of course, have different names for their alternate personas, but I'm not clever enough with names and not skilled enough with English language. Let's just say: Simon doesn't bother; Bloom comes up with a name for every person he gives a miraculous to, but none of them use those; Stephen has a million names, all very deep and clever, but the only one that stuck is whatever Mulligan mockingly called him that one time; and I don't know what's Bee!Mulligan name is, but it's inappropriate for general audiences.

I’ll have some placeholder names to make it easier for myself. Stephen may remain Chat Noir (he would probably name himself after a cabaret, at least to honour his teenage rebellion against church); Simon Dedalus can be Moth Daddy; Buck is… idk, Hornet? Hornet will do.

May Dedalus, Stephen’s mother, died not from cancer but from the misuse of the damaged peacock miraculous. After her death, Simon started akumatizing people into villains. He’s aware of the wish, but at this point it’s mostly about revenge to Chat Noir.

(Chat Noir might be the one who damaged the peacock miraculous in the first place, but it never said outright.)

He, of course, doesn't know anything about his son being Chat. Stephen, however, knows everything about his parents, but has no idea what to do with this information. It's a source of his resentment, but he can't bring himself to properly sort out his feelings.

Mulligan and Stephen know nothing about each other’s alternate identities. Stephen is friends with Mulligan mostly because his father doesn't want it. He actually resents Mulligan a lot, but is sympathetic towards Hornet because sees him as someone similar to him, someone who could actually understand his world-view and take it seriously. Chat spends some efforts to turn Hornet to his side but to no avail. Mulligan, on the other hand, thinks Chat Noir is a pretentious prick, but has a lot of genuine admiration for Stephen, even though he hides it under the layers of sarcasm and cynicism, as he doesn't want to be seen as weak. And that is your love square, everybody.

Hornet starts out as an independent party, but at some point begins working for Moth. Naturally, Simon finds out his identity and that’s the main reason he doesn’t want to see him anywhere near his son.

It’s Bloom who deals with the most akuma emergencies. He often recruits different dubliners to his side, but almost none of them stick to the job. Chat helps time to time, even though this help is often incidental, and he’s a lot more interested in Hornet shenanigans. Bloom is aware of Chat, but they never have time to properly talk to each other. Bloom wants to meet him; Bloom is searching for him.

The guardian duties tire him a lot. Bloom inherited the miracle box from his father with three miraculous already missing. Later he lost the fourth one, the bee miraculous, which he considers his greatest mistake. His relationship with Molly is not that great either. She used to regularly take a role of Ladybug, but after her singing career took off, she started losing interest. Nowadays Bloom often gives the ladybug miraculous to other women. Gerty is one of them.

Boylan is there somewhere. There’s probably an episode where he gets akumatized and Bloom and Molly are the ones to deal with it (very awkward for all parties).

Just so you know, the masturbation scene is still there.

There are a lot of Odyssey themed akumas. For instance, local back-seat political expert The Citizen is turned into Cyclops.

There was one person Stephen tried to tell about Chat Noir. A few years ago, before his run off to Paris, he tried talking to Cranly about the ring. He immediately got excited about the possibilities, insisted he and Stephen could work together as a superhero team. Stephen tried to explain himself, but ultimately saw that Cranly wouldn't ever understand. He brushed the whole thing off as a joke and never returned to it. At some point, Stephen thinks he should reveal himself to Mulligan, but then remembers Cranly and decides against it.

Haines’s dream about panther hunting is still there and now it cuts even deeper.

There’s a Chat Blanc type episode. It’s called Pangur Bán and it’s about the horrifying alternate reality of Stephen staying in Ireland (it’s not that bad, actually, but Stephen has a meltdown).

Ultimately, Stephen finds out Hornet is Mulligan. That's what seals his betrayal to Stephen, so there is nothing he could do but go to the brothel and get drunk. What led him to this discovery is that during their last encounter Hornet reused one of Stephen's aphorisms only Mulligan could know at that point. (He also grossly misquoted it and twisted the meaning.)

It’s in the brothel that Bloom recognizes Stephen (who is severely drunk at this point) as a son of his friend and saves him from the trouble he’s about to lead himself into. That’s when he notices the ring and realizes that Stephen is Chat Noir.

Bloom is happy beyond belief. He’s finally met someone he could share his guardian duties with. He buys Stephen some food and lets him sober up a bit, afterwards he invites him to his home and proposes a plan. Stephen could live in Bloom’s house with a better, more stable job. Bloom could share all his guardian knowledge with him, so he could better control his powers. They could work together as a team to finally bring Moth and Hornet to justice and end all this mess. Finally, Stephen could become the next guardian and have a miracle box all to himself. He responds to this with silence. Bloom apologizes and says he understands it’s a lot to take in, so he tells Stephen to think on it until morning.

Bloom falls asleep near his wife, full of hope for the future.

Before dawn, Stephen leaves Bloom’s house with his ring and his wallet. He plans to spend his last money on a ticket to France.

Before we end, a few things about an ideal media format for this AU:

It’s an animated tv series, at least 3 seasons long.

The style and quality of animation varies drastically from episode to episode, sometimes suddenly changing in the middle of one. There are at least 9 studious working on this, the communication between them isn’t great.

It all takes place in one day, 16 June 1904, but the viewers can’t tell that for sure until the last episode. This revelation might frustrate them at first, but once they’ll look back, they realize it kind of makes sense, as there is hardly any change of weather or time of day during the vast majority of episodes.

Unfortunately, it will be very hard to look back at, as all the episodes are aired out of order.

The series is broadcasted in many countries, each of which has its own order of episodes. And none of them has a full translation. Actually, nobody can have a full translation, until the thing becomes public domain. Until then, there are only automatically generated and machine translated subtitles. And fansubs, I guess.

Not to mention it gets banned really quickly in a lot of places.

The fans lose their mind, trying to establish continuity. There are multiple theories and theme tables to make sense of it all. The meaning also can change drastically, depending on the order you watch it in, so there are full-blown fandom continuity wars. People go mad. People die. It feels like a fever dream.

But once it all put together?

Absolute masterpiece.

Thank you for reading. Sorry for any mistakes or awkward English. 

Was this necessary? No. Will I stand by it? Well, yes I said yes I will Yes

[normal-thoughts-official]

Do you have any hcs for Magnus taking ppl to pride for the first time? I kinda feel like he’d act as a guide for others, making sure everyone feels safe and happy during their first time. Like, I can picture him bringing daylighter Raphael out for the first time, showing Meliorn around (bc even though they’ve been around for a while, the Seelies don’t really do human stuff) and holding Alec’s hand while he looks around in amazement.

well surprise surprise this got very long. bet y’all never saw that coming

ok so i particularly love this ask because like, the idea of meliorn going to pride for the first time is a riot and i adore it

like seelie society has developed completely independently from mundane society in every way, hell, it existed before humans did. so there's absolutely no reason whatsoever to believe that their culture even has the concepts of gender of sexuality, and believing that it would be the same as modern western ones is just straight up anachronistic tbh

so like personally i hc that seelie society has no gender (and therefore no concept of sexuality in the way that we see it), so the idea of pride- doesn't even make sense to them, cuz there's no concept of these identities, much less a history of oppression that would bring forward the need to celebrate their resistance like there currently is

so meliorn would want to go just to like, see what that's like and what's it all about. and the whole time they're just following Magnus around and like, taking notes. hm, interesting, what is this trans thing again? ah yes, people who dont think their personality matches the one mundanes believe would be brought by their genitals. hm. fascinating. and Magnus is just like, laughing loudly and it's the best pride he's ever been to, because he knows how ridiculous queerphobia and cishetnormativity are, but meliorn can make that so clear in their words in a way thats just, like, fantastic to hear, you know? and they dont even mean to, but it's great all the same

plus meliorn actually does feel good because a lot of people look at them and smile broadly or even wave, especially younger people who are just like, in awe of them and Magnus, who are so unapologetically gnc and indisputably beautiful, and looking at them is just like, inspiring, you know? and Meliorn has never felt this admired and appreciated and they dont even fully understand why, they're just walking around in their usual clothing and leaf makeup and everyone is just like, in love with them. and it's nice. they can tell there's an edge of sadness to the whole thing, like how their normal everyday existence seems to be so shocking and refreshing for these people, but mostly they feel good about it

later they bring their findings to the other seelies - you know, the ones who dont usually leave the realm and are way less familiar with mundane culture(s) than they are - and the others are like. shut up. there's no way this is real. the shape of their genital defines what wavelength they are supposed to find appealing? this makes no sense. and meliorn's like "idk what to tell u buddy i literally physically can't lie" and they're like surely this is an elaborate prank

but anyway it's fun and nice and they enjoy it greatly and ask Magnus a lot of questions, and Magnus loves going with them more than anyone else because its just so fun and the way this is completely unnatural to them feels refreshing - Magnus doesnt have to explain why he feels the way he feels, for once, but rather he has to explain why people dont get that, and thats a good change tbh

okay onto other ppl im sorry for this tangent djdndjdndk RAPHAEL YES. god i just. okay i love the mental image of Magnus taking Raphael to pride aaaaaaaa

like okay first of all so many layeRS to make this emotional, okay. the fact that he's now a daylighter and can enjoy being out in the sun, the fact that this is a bright costumed parade and it kinda reminds him of the día de los muertos parade and makes him feel at home, the fact that he gets to celebrate and meet other ace ppl - just, so many good things going on here dundidmdi

and Raphael was kinda unsure about going because 1- pride can get pretty sexual at times, and while he gets it and doesn't mind other people's business, he doesn't want to be hit on or participate in that; 2- big crowd makes senses go craycray and it can get very overwhelming and he's scared of overload, plus it's just not his scene in general with huge parties and such. but a part of him does want to go and he's torn, so of course Magnus is immediately like "oh dear, don't worry, i can take you, i'll make sure it's good" and Raphael is like okay

so Magnus takes him and it's :') nice, because as always he’s just so attentive. disclosure i’ve only ever been to the São Paulo pride so i’m gonna go with how it works in here but im assuming it’s not that different in like, other places. also São Paulo currently has the biggest pride parade in the world along with NYC so you know, i think it’s influential at the very least

anyway so he finds a section that’s led by ace pride groups, one that’s considerably small (in number of ppl) and spacious, and it’s. nice. very nice. magnus makes it a point to paint the ace pride colors on raphael’s face (we deserve raphael in makeup tbh) and raphael is all like “it’s fine, it’s not like i’ll want to draw a lot of attention” (like he isn’t wearing the ace flag colors already) and magnus is like hush, let me have this, i want my boy to have a good pride experience. so raphael lets him and hides his smile and lets him, and it’s. cute okay

also idk why but i have the mental image of raphael seeing some other latino guy with some sign like. “i’m not your fetish” or something of the sort, and kind of tearing up because his whole life he’s been seen as this kind of sexual fantasy that couldn’t not be about sex, much less not be interested in it, and he feels seen. and it’s nice, okay

and as promised it’s not too overwhelming in matters of like people, tactile issues and such (there’s little magnus can do about the noise other than spell raphael to decrease his sensitivity so he doesn’t get overwhelmed, which is not ideal because it makes communication a bit harder between them, but he does it anyway if raphael asks him to), and if raphael gets tired, they can always turn into a corner and take a portal back home and cuddle the post-crowd jitteriness away. so it’s a success. and raphael hugs magnus later and thanks him and says that it was so great, that he’s missed this, the energy and the colors and the sun, and he never thought he’d get to have it again, and he did thanks to magnus. and magnus hugs him back and tells him “anything for you, my boy,” and it’s the sweetest thing okay im emo

also okay this still falls under Raphael and Meliorn but the POLYCULE okay, or at least saiaphaeliorn. like sign me the fuck up for the 4 of them together at pride, meliorn and magnus helping make some cute pride-themed makeup on the other 3, just aaaaaaaaa. maia looking absolutely gorgeous with her face framed in the bright bi colors, maybe a sunny dress with the trans flag colors? just because i think she’d look so cute in like, a mostly white dress with baby pink and blue details, okay. simon just paints the pan flag on his cheek but it’s still vibrant and cute and it suits him. and ghhghghghg meliorn delicately painting raphael’s face with colorful glitter..... effervescent, okay. just beautiful

and they get to hold hands in public and laugh and crack jokes and simon loves the music and the festival and raphael smiles fondly at him and maia singing along (him and meliorn definitely don’t know what the fuck they’re singing, but it’s okay because they’re clearly happy and that makes the two of them happy too) and just duahsdiahdaiuha soft okay. also they all get to experience meliorn’s takes on the whole thing and it’s fantastic and as usual meliorn gets raphael to laugh until he almost cries, and simon smiles brightly at the sight and gives meliorn a peck for their efforts, and just aaaaaaaa

in short they’re SOFT and i’m SOFT. and look yes i know that usually parades esp big ones are super crowded (lord knows the SP pride parade is an experience) but if in SP with 5 million ppl parading i could find sections with less people where you had enough space to walk holding hands and hear each other and not be overwhelmed, then i’m sure they can too, especially with magic and powers at their disposal. so i’m going to have this

also like. as much fun as this is for magnus (and it definitely is, it’s very nice to get to enjoy to be himself openly, and to bring kids there for their first time, and you know), it’s also bittersweet because like. he was there at stonewall, he was there for the first pride, you know? and apart from the obvious part where he lost so many friends who were there, there’s just. the very bad memories of the riots, because as important as they are and as much as he obviously doesn’t regret them, riots are hard, they are the language of the oppressed. he’s had to magically protect people from being shot by the police, he’s had to withstand trial by the Clave for using magic to shield the people from the tear gas and risking being seen, he’s had to save a lot of lives and he’s failed at it sometimes, too (i’ll always hc that he’s the reason neither Marsha nor Sylvia died during the riots and you can pry that away from my cold, dead hands). and he’s also seen it be whitewashed and lose some of its resistance and meaning, he’s seen Sylvia be booed at a later march when she spoke against imprisonment, and he’s seen so much be lost

and in that sense going to pride with alec later on might be his favorite, because it’s not like, a first time where he’s trying to get everyone to have the most fun they can and shit, you know? plus alec loves watching more than he does participating, he feels way too exposed in the crowded streets with so many openings and whatnot. but watching from a rooftop, where he has the best view, can still hear the sounds and enjoy the colors and the beauty of it from a distance? that’s perfect for him, and it’s a different experience

and magnus sits by his side as they watch, hand in hand, and reminisces about everything that he’s experienced after so many years, all the changes he’s seen, how he feels pride but he also feels loss and he feels old, and he fears what happens if pride’s history is forgotten, you know? and alec listens to him, listens to his version of this story, playing with magnus’ fingers and just enjoying the sound of his voice and the sight. and it’s nice. alec is always super attentive and enjoys hearing him talk and magnus can get lost in his memories unapologetically, you know? and it’s good

but that’s later on, of course, when they’ve already attended plenty together. for alec’s first pride he probably wants it to be like, perfect, so much so that alec has to tell him to slow down again, because of course magnus wants alec to have The Full Pride Experience, but alec would rather soak it up slowly than participate in a lot of stuff, anyway. magnus paints the rainbow flag on his cheek (one of the only occasions alec lets magnus put glitter on him, then promptly complains for the next three months because i swear that stuff is still on my skin, magnus, the other day i found some on my shoes! and magnus laughs at his antics as always and alec is forced to laugh too and can’t even be mad) and they kind of stay more by the end, and alec is kind of smiling in disbelief to himself the whole time as he watches all the colors and the unapologetic way people express their pride, and magnus can’t stop looking at him and grinning, too. and they walk hand in hand and it’s cute

(later, magnus says, see, mundane culture isn’t so bad, is it? and alec looks at him with a way more serious look, full of joy and happiness, and says, no, it isn’t. and kisses him and thanks him for everything, and it’s sweet)

also I'm soft thinking about Magnus reminiscing about planning the first pride along with "his dear friend Brenda" to Alec and/or Raphael, them putting their arms around his shoulder as he tells them the softer stories, too, the good things they did

small bonus: Magnus plays 2 truths and a lie with Simon regarding his memories of past prides, and Simon gets it wrong every time and is all wide eyed by the end, which makes both Magnus and Raphael laugh :)