#idk i jist dont like it all that much

[vampire-fanboy]

theres two sides to me one where im so sad we didnt get branch as the one who got captured and had to be saved in the third, then theres another part of me thats happy he wasnt the one who got captured JNJGNDSJ

i feel it would've been so much more emotional if branch got captured? but at the same time idk how they couldve done it/made it work with how the current movie goes along w other stuff

idk theres a lot to it but im so YAAAY and NOOO that he isnt the one who got captured n it stayed a concept jNJGDJFS

[haemosexuality]

these past few days i have been uncharacteristically. emotionally open. w my friend and it has me thinking about how truly for all of my life i just did not expect anything from anyone

[marcus--666]

.

[kodtheshiftinggodd]

‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡𓂃 ࣪MY MAIN REALITIES ִֶָ☾.

— ALT REALITY .ᐟ

i haven’t decided if i’ll be permashifting or respawning here yet. i won’t delve too much into this one as it’s just this reality with some tweaks. tbh, i have no problem with this reality other than my boyfriends mental health, the political climate, and just how shitty society is as whole.

my boyfriend definitely makes this reality so much better and i’m the happiest i’ve ever been/best mentally. but he does struggle with severe depression so idk. i won’t get into my personal fears. we both are gonna shift so he can be happier <3

the extra tweaks are just i added my dr friend group that’s in every reality, better financially, better political world, & i get to learn how to tattoo i live in a very small town & there’s nowhere for me to apprentice so yeah. that’s the jist for this reality. still haven’t decided if i’ll be permashifting or completely respawning there so <3 yep.

— AOT ALT REALITY .ᐟ

okay! so this one is just i am learning how to tattoo ( yes again ) except I moved to Oregon dream location to be Levi Ackerman’s apprentice. Oh, and for sure date Jean Kirstein. My usual friend group is scripted per usual & i added two of my shifting friends from this reality. My friend Hady has her own little coffee shop that I help out at. there’s also a mix of singing & content creation stuff in this as well minus the big crazy fame because i don’t wanna be recognized all the time. nothing too crazy in this one, pretty similar to my ALT REALITY…

— FANTASY REALITY .ᐟ

okay so this will literally be getting its own post because it’s so extensive. i usually refer to it as my VALERIAN REALITY as the place i live in is called Valeria yes i stole that from game of thrones, its a pretty name okay and i basically made it my OP/main character reality. to sum things up, i am the secret heir to the throne of Valeria, but i dont know it. i didnt script much to this, i want to be surprised on how i find out and all that. AOT is obvi scripted in, Paradis Island is where they live. uhhh I just didn’t script in the dumb dumb no brain titans that eat people and like- they know about other countries. the rumbling also never happens. the Marleyan Empire does exist but yeah no rumbling.

i didn’t script much for the lore of this but just based off like dr memories, readings, and dreams… Eldia and Valeria have this weird/cool connection that could bring on the “golden age of peace” so yes. once i become Queen i will ally with Eldia and after a good enemies to lovers with Jean, he will be King of Valeria. there’s a lot of memories and stories from this dr that i will make a whole separate post on <3 i am definitely like crazy connected to this dr already and so excited to shift here.

happy shifting <3

[bunnihearted]

-.-

and no but fr it's easy for ppl to say im dramatic or too much or 'should just get over it'. but i've never had love feelings like this for anyone ever... i could go into depth but that's just the jist: i love this person so deeply so deeply it's so rare and so all consuming. and i might seem lame or stupid or pathetic but these feelings have been controlling me for 1.5yrs... (the crush developed fast). like actually controlling my life and idk what to do abt it. and it freaks me out bc i have gotten over crushes!!! i had one on a guy i knew and was friends with, but i didnt realize i had a crush until after we had 0 contact w eo. and it took me like 4yrs until i could think of him without chest pain and dread in my stomach??? then i had one on my physical therapist, but bc that relationship was strictly professional and he had no platonic nor physical interest in me, and i didnt even see him when my sessions ended, i got over him in 1 year and now dont even think of him. but this is different... it's also different bc it is the most "romance" (like incl. any share sexual and platonic and affectionate energy etc) that i've also received from my crush. like this is even harder for me to let go bc even if it wasnt an actual relationship, it felt close to one (esp so for me since i've never even had a relationship). plus my feelings and thoughts and sentiments i expressed wasnt one sided. so ..... like i am genuinely scared abt how i will get past this bc i cant live w this pain??? since im extra emotional like much more than an average person it hurts so fucking bad like so fucking bad. and it scares me bc 1) i dont wanna feel like this plus i keep thinking of it and 2) if i keep feeling like this it will close me off from meeting new potentional connections. so like yeah ppl can be dismissive all they want but i really dont want to feel like this bc it hurts so bad and it drives me insane and it is actually affecting my life... like im unable to function properly bc like ppl with whole full lives and are also not made like me might be normal abt things but.. this was al i wanted dreamed abt and just felt so much for and like idk what to do without it and idk how to function w it.

ok yeah maybe i sound crazy but like genuinely i feel insane abt it. and ppl just tell u to move on but like ?!?!?!?!? i dont know i dont know. if i met the first person i've loved like this at 25 ... what does that mean???????? if just crushes have taken me years to get past, how long will this take and how much will it hurt??? im like genuinely terrified bc i cant even imagine my life without them 🙃🙃🙃 i cant imagine wanting anyone else or feeling this way with anyone else 🙃🙃🙃🙃 and i know what ppl say ok i know i know!!!!! but i just cant?? idk how to process that bc im 25.. and i have /never/ felt this way.... maybe it just sounds crazy but i think i was made for them (but its sad when they arent made for me ofc</3). and might sound crazy but everyone are different and i just needed smth like this and idk!!!! yes i sound crazy idc im like so scared of emotions and how deep they are and idk what to do. bc apparently therapists dont want u coming to them to talk abt this and like ummmmm what if i cant let this go and keep going insane forever. i saw someone say they had unrequited love for someone for 10yrs and couldnt get over it. what the fuck?!?!? i wanna scream like how is this real 😦😦😦😦 is there any drug for me to take to lose all my emotions?!?!? 🫨🫨🫨🫨

[violentviolet-vv]

woah two posts in one day??? anyway thats mot thw reason im positng im posting bwcuz i never rlly had a foreign kids au thing, but now ive been thinking abt them aged up in middle/high school au (everythinf in camp camp happened btw thia is just the aftermath) so im just gonna yap abt ot knoeing no one will read this

sorry in advance for any spelling mistakes this is literally just a concept plan and like jm super dupper tired becuz i finally fixed my sleeping schedule becuz school started😁😁 which means no more 3 am posts woohoo!! and km wrting this on phone which i hate.💔

anyway the plan for the atory would be like. starting off with the foreign kids?? i dont rlly have an antagonist asides from brian(kimchi.) and ainsley so ig they qould b the ones causing the chaos (villian revenge ainsley au woohoo!!!)and like.i have a strong feeling that the trio would change their identities to protect themselves. (not toooo drastically. mainly just like. names off by one letter like 'Deng' and 'Hwang' and like.... vera but the E or A is replaced by a different vowel idk.....)

i think it would start off with brian bejng betrayed by like. kentucky government idk bro this show is so goofy. and he eventually stumbles upon ainsley somehow (dont ask i didnt put much thought knto this) and they both end up relating to each other and teaming up to take down the foreign kids!!!! (ainsley doesnt know theres more involved with vera, so she automatically hates them too now, but her main goal is to like. ruin vera first)

so they both plan how to like. track them down and atuff idk turn them in since theyre wanted by thai, north korean, russian and american government ig too.... (i need to rewatch camp camp dawg😿)

i dont actually have a plot yet i jist thought this would be a funny idea. also all background characters WILL make an appearance (maybe excluding cj or whatever the new camp counciloes name is. i dont like him)

i would write a fic about this but.... have you seen my last post i mistook THREE WORDA FOR DIFFERENT ONES. i already edited it hut im truly ashamed of myself. AND IM IN HONORS LANGUAGE ARTS DAWG THIS IS HUMILIATKNG.😿

[yokakaiju]

doro modern(?) au

SPOILER WARNING + LONG POST BELOW CUT

i am so tired while writing this, so apologies if some of it doesnt make sense bleh.. i will happily answer any and all questions to the best of my ability tho!!

okay so ngl... it's really not that different from canon i think? i really don't know much abt my own damn au atm cause i mostly think of it during work and for some reason i literally NEVER write anything down?? idk why???

ALSO TO PREFACE!!! DESPITE HAVING READ DORO IN FULL ABT 4 TIMES NOW AND AM GOING ON A FULL YEAR OF HYPERFIXATION HERE SOON I HAVENT BRUSHED UP ON THE LAST 60-70 CHAPTERS IN A MINUTE SO SORRY IF I MAKE A STUPID MISTAKE!!!

this shit is all 100% subject to change later btw:

• genuinely just abt everything that took place in doro takes place in the past during this au, but not in the same way or with the same characters. ik some stuff 100% wouldnt make sense because of this, BUT BLEHH ILL FIGURE IT OUT LATERR!!! literally jist like.. remove everything involving aikawa and risu and replace it with violent social unrest or smth idk yet...

• ne way, this takes place 100 years after the kaiman holey fight, but in this au it wasnt our kaiman

• the sorcerer and human world have been permanately sealed off from each other since hole fight

• humans at this point dont necessarily believe sorcerers even exist anymore due to this, but the older generations (the few people who live to be like 80-100+) are still somewhat afraid of them and think that some may still be in hole (they are)

• abt hole and this is gonna need a lot of reworking, but like.. idk. basically some humans worship hole as a modern god, taking everything that happrned as absolute truth and churches sprung up around holey, worshiping large statues made of his bones and stuff. the statues do still work as they did in base doro, but they arent as widespread anymore? theyre way more popular with older people and thr newly religous folk, but most people see them as some sort of novelty at this point and they arent widely owned outside of churches and hospitals anymore

• the refuse lake also is back kinda? but its mostly a normal lake now, but the water is still extremely tar like in some parts so its still gated off

• in the socerer world, all information regarding humans and the hole have been banned from being spoken about or learned by the general public. personal doors are also prohibited to be used/learned to be used and anyone who CAN use them that uses them unsanctioned will face capitol punishment or smth. really only the devils and en family know abt hole and shit (theres more people of course, but these are details idk yet)

• n e way, in modern era nikaido and aikawa (sigh we will get to him last...) work together at the hungry bug still

• nikaidos story is literally almost exactly the same. she is still being pseudo hunted by the en family because they got word of a time traveling socerer like howveer long ago and are trying to hunt her down in secret (they dont know its her directly tho)

• kasukabe/haze is still just chillin tho. he is nearly unchanged, still wrote books on socerers (however they were written more historically for a while, then eventually he met haru and they became research/science based) snd took ai as an appretenice, but his work outside of human medicine is thought of as crackpot conspiricy talk or entirely fictional. him and haru are stil married/divorced, haru is also atill a devil and he still has a skin door to the sorcerer world

• ive had some ideas abt shin, mostly that his mom was killed alongside his dad after someone tipped off the  militia that there was somehow still sorcerers in the hole. they investigated their home for a bit and caught her using a door, so they raided the home and slaughted his family in front of him. from there shins story doesnt change much at all rn tbh

• the en family is still highly regarded and very opressive in the socerer world. they dont destroy schools anymore because duh no black powder, but they (with some devil influenece as well) heavily regulate what is taught. resistence against the en family, namely trying to learn about doors and hole, are cruely punished to show they arent fucking around, despite them still having acess to the hole and knowing (somewhat) the true events of what lead to them being separated

• i havent put much thought into the fate of the cross eyes in this au yet, but ive had some ideas? they arent the cross eyes (yet) but, they (our commanders + natsuki and risu) were low ranking memebers who are part of a resistance against the en family that attempts to fight their opression/censorship of history and some higher ups (not the commanders rn) are even trying to figure out how to make a door to the hole or smth

• this is abt all i have rn (im also super tired writing this ugh), so sigh... aikawa time i suppose... this part is gonna be long and confusing and 99% of everything ive talked abt so far was stemed from this, so heres a barely tldr tldr becase im probably making a seperate post when im not so tired. okay TLDR: ai was always disallusioned with being a human becauee his grandpa told him about sorcerers and magic and shit, so he fully bought into hazes entire catalouge of books taking thrm as gospel. eventually he meets haze and works under him, getting close enough to see some of his studies on sorcerer corpses. due to the corpses having smoke/black powder and were killed with hatred for their fellow sorcerers (they were killed by the en family), it starts to slowly affect ais young brain and the seed of a new hole have been planted blah blah, anyway he starts having horrific nightmares from the pov of hole from over a century ago and starts hearing shit cause hes already really mentally unwell. pretyu much from here it goes thr same as base doro for rn. he begs haze to help him become a sorcerer, he has all his plans snd shit tk make it work with the "fresh corpses" (either murders or bodies provided by haru) haze has access to, but haze refuses. ai just gets worse as time goes on, but him being a little emo freak he never actually vocalizes it, but as per cannon he decided to just force hazes hand. one night haze and ai were illegally hunting for potential relics of hole or the events surrounding that around the older parts of the refuse lake whrn ai ended up throwing himself into the tar. however instead of throwing himself in the refuse lake cause he needs a corpse he was compelled by hallucinations or smth to throw himself in. haze saves him and ends up doing the surgery om him blah blah literally its not that different from here, ai still "dies" and is buried he was also made of the 9(?) corpses so hes till got all his heads ans shit. when he rises this time tho instead of going to the sorcerer world he goes to haze again immediatly and begs him not to tell anyone. from here on haze hides him ot smth since he looks so different now no ones gonna recognize him or whatevs

this aint a fuckin tldr whoops. anyway uh.. ill make a seperate post abt aikawa/kai/EVERYONE ELSE IN THERE later cause i fell asleep twice writing that

please ask questions if you have any!! i will work on this more as time goes on i imagine and ill try to start actually writing ny ideas down now

[digital-roots]

Terrence Suave or Carol Cross for the ask thing :)

Imma do both teehee

Terrence Suave

How I feel about this character: I HATE HIM!!!! Anyways for real though I find him really interesting teehee i like chewing on him like a barbie doll hand

All the people I ship romantically with this character: I ❤️ Coppersuave you people have no idea how much im obsessed with the version of them I've created fuck. I also crack ship him with Thomas for funnies

My non-romantic OTP for this character: hmmm I don't know actually this guy isnt really the sort of person to have proper friends. Well I mean there is Rebelivin and Sweetheart but those 2 are only close with him in our respective AUs,,,,

My unpopular opinion about this character: I like seeing most interpretations of Suave but I'm getting a little tired at seeing the same 'hes completely evil and unabashedly a charming villain' take for him. I like me some variety and nuance every so often.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: Hmmm honestly? I'm totally fine with how irrelevant he is to the actual games. It makes room for speculation so i dont really care that he's only a cameo

Carol Cross

How I feel about this character: She's a miserable hater and she's so real for that i love my girlboss (i am calling her this ironically)

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Earrings is the obvious contender I love all the fanworks they have. I also like shipping her with Victoria Grit cause you know how much I love toxic govt/toppat yuri

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Idk why but she and Slice are chill friends. She can always count on him to be a reliable guy edit: I FORGOT BUT ALSO RHM!!!! They fw each other and they respect each other a lot

My unpopular opinion about this character: Don't really know if she's controversial enough to warrant a supposed 'unpopular' take

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: I jist wish she had actual voicelines like how come we couldnt hear her argument with Stu like cmon😭

[childhoodgrave]

who do you go for in stardew valley? (im gonna guess... harvey or krobus? it feels wrong only guessing guy characters but none of the girls really seem up ur alley) also what skill do u end up maxing out first, if you've played multiple files? what kind of farmers do u end up making. r they self inserts or ocs. hi

HI GENO i was like how do you know ive been playing so much stardew valley recently and then i remembeted we are steam friends and ive also been. posting about it a lot LAWL ok so i do actually really enjoy harvey and krobus especially but ive never actually romanced any of thw guy characters they are completely uninteresting to me in that respect even though unfortunately i think they get to be more interesting than most of the women SADLY. a lot of my more recent playthroughs i have gone for krobus or havent pursued any romance options bc i jist like the grind more… i dont think ive ever even gotten to the point in marriage where u like have children at all BUT when i was very very into it in early high school i usually went for maru or abigail. and funnily enough on my current playthru im trying to go 100% on i actually married haley LOL idk why but i now find her very cute.. i feel like she didnt have much of an interesting like arc? infact i kind of enjoyed when she was much meaner to the player character and wish she stayed that way even after she gets closer to you but OH WELL i am just very charmed by her currently.

ummm ok im trying to remember for skills i think i usually end up maxing out mining first… i love the mines but ive never even reached level 100 in the skull caverns yet.. IM TRYING TO THOUGH. fishing is very fun but usually for the first year or 2 in a playthru its not what i focus on. AND my farmers are literally always self inserts lol i dont play many games w like character customization stuff so when i do i usually end up making a self insert.. though if i ever emd up playing bg3 i plan on coming up w just like an oc for it. here what i look like on my singleplayer file AND then how i look in the coop file ive been playing a lot w my friends which i actually prefer more to how i look in single player but ive been too lazy to change it..

I LIKED THIS QUESTION ALOT and now i want to know what your answers to all pf this are im curious..

[ispreadrabieslikewildfire]

Please tell me about Harper and Feena!

OMEHAGUROHMEGAUR OKOKOKOKOKOKOK SOSOSOOSOSOSO (thamk yo uso much TEHE) alao im sorry if this makes NO SENSE im spilling my head into paragraphs and not proofreading rhis is gonna end HORRIBLY but i hope you enjoy😭!

Anwyay so harper and feena started when @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat asked me to draw a silly guy eating monster much and he turned into harper (ill link some pictures to show) and he felt lonely so i made him a friend called feena and theyve been a thibg since then HOLY SHIT I THINK ITS BEEN 2 YEARS?????

Harper and feena r supposed to be my silly ocs that are my go toos when i start daydreaming and drawing! Their not supoosed to have too much trauma and stuff (IM CONTAINING MYSELF) so i camt head empty and harper its also so when i draw them they make me happy they are my happyness. So becazue i cant give them trauma i make altermate realitoes where i CAN give them trauma!!

Im gonna make sections so i caj explain everthing so it can atleast try to make sense

1. THEIR RELATIONSHIP :3

Ok so when i started I made them friends ofc!! And i thought they where cool as hell so i started thinking about their relationship and i was thinking how wierd it would feel if they where a couple so their thing is that their completely platonic and are jist realy close friends that are realy comfortable with each other, i wouldnt say like 'siblings' but more like that one cousin that your realy close with. I like to think of them as denji and power from chainsaw man (however i see denji and power as more of siblings) but no matter how close they get with eachither they dont feel anything romantic :3 i have a thing that when they where 14/15 they where like fuck it lets kiss and they hated it!!!!! they wanted to die!!!!!

I also have different ages for them i draw them as for whatever mood im in! So i have toddler harper and feena (theyve met in primary school) and then children harper and feena (10-12) and then theres also teen (14-16) and preadult idk forgot what its called (17-19) and adult! (20-22) by 20-22 they have an appartment with 2 other roomates nadia and caspian i dont realy have a story for them yet however they do have designs. So basically they jsut spend their entire lives together as besties and this is their main world where their happy and have no trauma and are just silly!!

2. Sexualities n stuff

Well im nor good at this stuff since i realy have no kmowledge but i kinda just peojected me and @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat onto them...

Harper:

Bisexual, he/they. Dyslexic and/or is on the autism spectrum idk i dont think much about this

Feena:

Aro/ace or Asexual i havent decided, goes by anything. I honestly dont even know she is any and all illnesses

3. Childhood and all

So i dont wanna give them a traumatic childhood since their my silly chracters!!

HOWEVER, they do have some sort of backstories.

Feena:

Some sort of religious trauma, her family where 100% praise our lord and saviour jesus christ and she didnt feel part. Knew what she was when she was a teen and after harper came out and was more comfortable. Didnt tell her parents until she moved out, (they very obviously didnt take it well) however is still in touch with them!! Their just kinda realy uncomforable whenever the subject changes to jesus or gay stuff idk.

Harper:

Twas a bit (a lot) stupider than most people his age (austismmmmm) his parents payed more attention to their sisters so that they could have a better education instead of wasting their time on a child thatll never learn and refuses to listen (wasnt diagnosed till he was an adult so they thought he was being annoying purposefully). Tbh just whats a hug LMAO. He came out to his parents, they told him it was just a phase and theylll get out of it eventually.

So ya!

4. The cats need their own section

So ive always eanted these 2 cats, one called jester one called mariposa. So if i cant have them whats better than having my oc that represents me having them?

This is jester! (SHES PREFECT THIS IS HOW I ENVISION HER)

This is mariposa :3

5. Universes

Like i said since i dont want harper and feena to have too much trauma i create new universes for them! Other than my main ailly one theres another 3 i favour out of all the ones i make

1. I made a dystopian after apocolypse one (MY PERSONAL FAVOURITE ITS SO FUN TO MAKE!!) where the aftermath is that the world (well at leats where their living) is split into two, the privlidged and less priveledged (I NEED NAMES FOR THESE I DONT HAVE ANY) anywwy what i think i can best decribe this as is like the hunger games, where theres the 'capitol' and the 'districts' but instead of there being districts its all just survival of the fittest L lmao so yah. So after the apocolypse harper and feena are split up. Feena ends up with the privileged and harper ends up with the less. Harper finds a place he can call 'home' (FOUNDFAMILYFOUNDFMILYFOUNDFAMILY) and feena ends up on the other side where she gets her memories wiped and she then hets brainwashed to belive she was sent down as a gift from god during hard times and everyone is supposed to worship her (tehe i wont bother yiu with any more of this story)

2. Silly little 80s teen ghost busting show like scooby doo with harper feena nadia and caspian

3. detective harper and feena (havent built a lot)

6. I FORGOT TO ADD DYNAMIC

So basically feena can be smart when she wants to but chooses to fuck around with harper, quite a bitch if you guys just met. Pretty resereved when shes around people she doesnt know amd her social skills arent great. If you give her a chance she can be quite nice and passionate. Can ramble for hours on ends

Harper, guys hes trying his best. Loud, can ramble for hours on end too.

And thats all i can think of...sorry for ramblong so much i jist realy love them. i dont expect anyonw to actually read this... Once again this is just me projecting me and @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat onto harper anf feena!

Thank you @rainbowghostcat sososoososo much i love youuahahhah <333

Ill attach drawing of them in the mprning!

[bananafire11]

vent

please dont read if youre not in the right space rn. heavy on anger and feels. just wanna type it out somewhere and this blog is my safe space so

i am so fucking angry right now. like the kind of anger thats pent up and bubbles beneath the skin and is ready to implode out at any fucking second and i hate it so much. i dont feel like i have very good reasons for feeling this way either. or maybe im downplaying those reasons, i dunno

i dont want to bother any of my friends with this shit. i feel guilty because ik they have their OWN struggles. ik feeling this way is silly because i help them through so much, and am so glad to do so. but theres always this doubt.

anyway. on discord, i put my status on DNIUC sometimes because i just need space and ik that most of my close friends will see this and know to be careful that day. or if they text and im slow to respond, ik they understand. but theres these friends who KEEP spamming. and its driving me FUCKING MAD. one, who is very close and gosh i love them so much, sends me so much every day. youd think after the first few times i didnt respond, he'd get the fucking jist and think "ill stop there" but instead he KEEPS ON. ITS OVERWHELMING. and the subject of these texts isnt bad or anything, but its always about him and his bf. i dont have the energy to talk about them 24/7. im beyond happy for him, that hes happy. but FUCK. im asexual and never have been in a relationship, and sometimes it feels like a fuckyou to me?? ik he doesnt mean it that way at all!! but!!! idk, sometimes its like theres a longing for a bf of my own. but i dont want to settle. ill wait for the right boy. right now, hes not here. and im not actively looking for a relationship, i have so much shit going on. so, i usually ignore this guys dms as long as i can. i feel guilty, but at the same time fucking furious that i even have to do it in the first place, if that makes sense. i love him dearly, but it's forced me to just put my status on 'invisible' so it looks like im offline. better to avoid people, ig.

theres another guy, who isnt as close, but ive made great friends with thus far in the time ive met him over a game i enjoy. but again, doesnt know when to stop. why are you texting me when it says dniuc!!! YOU ARENT CLOSE. ive explained 'close' is friends ive known for a year or so, which isnt exactly true actually... but i needed to tell him something that wouldnt hurt his feelings. after i clarified for the second time, he let up. but still. people are fucking annoying and its so FRUSTRATING that i love them because that makes shit so complicated.

then, family. ive been snowed in with my mom and sister for over a fucking week and I NEED OUT. i never thought id say this but I WANT TO BE AT SCHOOL. AWAY FROM HOME. my neighbors, who are more so aunt and uncle to me and my sister, let me go over and stay hours with them when i need it. but i dont feel like trecking thru the fking snow to get there. last night i stayed over and watched a favorite movie of mine with them and it was great, but having the energy to do that feels exhausting tonight.

im trying to distract myself with art, but its not working like it normally does. and its goddamn hard. tried videogames, youtube, but nothing is bringing me true relief. but i dont want to sleep either. ugh.

vent art, anger.

[kosmic-arts]

(WARNING) 9PM BBS CRACK HEADCANON

BRUHBRUHBRUH i just had an idea right before im about to fall asleep i have to write this down so- for a while ive been mulling over ven's fate in bbs. in my headcanon/rewrite, i wish he actually died from his sacrifice instead of going comatose for 10 whole years. itd be a perfect way to erase his character, who after bbs, has essentially no purpose. also, free drama for aqua, the only remaining of the trio- right? yeah well, ive also been thinking that that outcome for ven is kind of... too depressing? kingdom hearts is a story about hope and friendship, but having an abused kid have to die just because he wants his friends to be safe does kind of stray outside the realm of kh. there should be some hope, right? im all for terra being unrecoverable after merging with xehanort, but ven dying does kind of have me a lil 😬 im not against characters coming back to life in stories, it just can't be overused and it needs to be earned and actually make sense. all the organization members coming back for free in kh is just lame as hell to me. thats right- and as much as i love axel like the next fanboy/girl, i wish he stayed dead asf. or at least, his resurrection was earned instead of just happening for free. you get my jist?? reversing character deaths i think is acceptable in a series with the more lighthearted themes that kh has, but i still want there to be some cost or else the story will lose all narrative stakes. SO. after rambling for 1000words, i finally get to my epic idea that im rushing to write down: ven does die at the end of bbs, but he reincarnates. as who? namine from recom. YUP my reasoning: namine has no reason to be kairi's nobody as she is pure of heart and cant have a nobody in the first place! dont come at me with the "oh she was in sora's body and his heart is blahblah"- idc. ven become girl. that better. how does he do this? well, idk. he was pure of heart himself, even if it was artificially caused. he could have epic princess of heart powers (THAT MIND YOU, ARE NEVER ELABORATED ON IN THE SERIES, SO THEORITCALLY PRINCESSES' COULD HAVE ANY POWER AT ALL AND ITD BE CANON???). he could've used said light powers perhaps inadvertently as he was dying, and it ended up allowing him to reincarnate about 10yrs later. namine, once ventus, retains kind of a blur of her past life and some of ven's old mannerisms, but for the most part is an entirely new person who just spawned into existence based on the lightborn wish of a dying child 10yrs ago. kind of cool, right? and it would make sense for ven to reincarnate in castle oblivion where namine is found because... get this! castle oblivion is the land departure and ven's home! his heart probably found its way there or some shit. so yeah. thats my crack headcanon ven girl 😴

[pumpkinland]

I am finding it increasingly frustrating how much emphasis is being put, primarily by nonbinary people imo, on how "yeah theres a lot more trans people than there used to be but dont worry! Not all trans people feel like they need surgery or hormones to transition to another gender!!!" likr to me it jist reeks of oh yes im trans but don't worry im normal im not delusional about my body im not trying to mutilate myself or anything :-) like idk the way its phrased always feels like you're meant to look down on us poor sods who do "feel like we need" surgery and hormones

[johnmalevolent]

LIVEBLOG

THE SOUNDDDDDD so good thesound of the train stopping. aorry im jist really excited ehwjjdjajd

oh this is the bit from the teaser

thats good actually knowing the rest of the episode isnt heard yet

im soryeeyerh idk why this is making me emotional (everything about john makes me emotional all the time but anyway) the way mundane human life strikes him with awe isnkdma

ADDISON

it did feel like a haze yeah. somewhat

um. arthur's yes was so cute

oyaoya new music???

are we getting some sleep now :)

right KIY. forgot about him. this is a horror podcast.

HE'S HIS OWNNSJSJDNMANDMQKDK

HE'S COME SO!!! FAR!!!!!!!!!

he brought him back UNMOTIVATE

LOVEMMMMNMNZNSMDKAKDN

THEY'RE FRIENDSSWSSHKWKDKSK

HE COULDNT

WAH

WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

no?

john doesnt know anything about yellow. okay

did he? make no deal?

oh you wish arthur

ANNA!!! i miss her

DOG

OUPPY?? 🥺

oh shit the tooth the head

"more than i already have been?" OUGh

DONT YOU REMEMBER IS A PAINFUL PHRASE TO HEAR NOW WTH

HE'S NOT ALONE TWO OF THEM🥺

insert me and michael song

i understand john but i want anna right now

kayne...

YEAH WHAT IS HE

would be funny if he's actually a major character in christianity

as much as im curious im still choosing anna

yippee thank you Arthur

oh shit keserempet

kota rame anjir tiati mas

a normal hotel! woohoo

wait what

i need to rewind

ohhhhhh okay

FATHER

ow

wait

not yet???????????????????????

DID HE AND BELLA NOT MARRY???????????????????

no sleep? :(

john learning how a hotel works is so

<3

okay saving the rest for later im making some treats for myself heehoo

[moved2fshfish]

i have watched the dsmp finale multiple times and it hits hard every time. i am emotionally wrecked rn.

wbu? also overall what are ur thoughts on the finale??

personally i thought it was gr8- tommy died a hero, dream didn't die a villain, and overall it felt very poetic and epic

i havent seen tommys pov so i cant really say many thoughts on that, i dont like that they made cdream sympathisable(?) i guess ? idk hes been the bad guy For the whole smp and if he was going to get a redemption arc i feel like it shouldnt have been rushed . he abused ctommy and drove him to attempt suicide not to mention all the shit he did to ctubbo too ?

ctubbos ending, on the Other hand :( ough.

im disapointed we didnt get closure for him. he never got to prove that he wasn"t just the sidekick, he never got to confront cdrm or Anyone, he just sort of.. stayed the pawn

he flicked the lever, thinking it was going to kill his best friend but also save the world. and his death ?? sitting on the bench where him and tommy always sat, listening to the discs???? ow

i dont like the ending that much . it feels sort of lazy and the "they all get amnesia" season 2 ??? its poetic That ctubbos creation ended everything, that ctommy died thinking he saved ctubbo, but, idk. i wish we couldve gotten closure

it feels like i cared about these characters for no reason, there wasnt Much actual tragedy in the ending but more being upset that all the characters i cared about died Jist like that

im gonna miss ctubbo man:( i think im mostly sad Because i relate to him a lot and him losing that hope of ever being happy made me lose some hope for myself

we never got cbeeduo ending, and what was in the book tommy left ???? what about micheal and the syndicate and the mushroom base and las nevadas and Karls time travelling ???? did ckarl know this wuz gna happen??

so many questions LMAO

i do think,that its an interesting ending. im sad that ctubbo wont ever go on to lead a happy life and im sad cbeeduo wont ever see each other again and im sad micheal is an orphan or probably dead

and im sad theres nobody to mourn ctubbo like he mourned everyone else , theres nobody to grieve or miss him or accidentially bring out an extra plate for dinner or look at his empty spot in the bed or notice his unused shoes on the porch but never get rid of them

all in all itwas a tragic miserable abrupt ending to a tragic miserable Smp

:(

[xherry7816]

holy moly xherry7816 you've reached 50 likes !!!! ive been working on some gi designs for the ninja but ive been struggling to show off their individuality while still looking like their gi but i havent actually looked up reference of gi so in pretty sure that should be the first step.

ok so the au (still unnamed) taking place in a slightly canon divergent season 5 MORRO is currently after the realm crystal in his attempts to bring the PREEMINENT (?) to NINJAGO and like destroy it or whatever, solid stuff. except whats different here is that MORRO does not go and posses LLOYD as his first step because he'd struggle more as a human than if he were a ghost so he and his ghoul gang decide to get the hard stuff out the way, the ninja chasing them to put a stop to him obviously. also in this au NYA is not told by WU that she is the water ninja, instead she receives her awakening when defending one of the team from a ghost and then hes like omg :0 !#!%#!$#??

the au starts off with the mission to retrieve the realm crystal on time (before MORRO) because even if he beats them to everythinf else MORRO cant do anything without the crystal. unfortunately for them !!! MORRO is already a few steps ahead and when they reach the resting place of the FSM they find the ghost, crystal in hand. boom boom battle !! and theyre all fighting anf there are ghosts everywhere (NYA is not here bc remember KAI isnt supposed to know hes the water ninja yet) and MORRO is very clearly goig after LLOYD. wait, ok wait i need to type up my thinking process rn or else it wont make sense when i read everything back bc isnt only a spinjulistu master able to find the tomb,,,,, ermmm OK LLOYD possesion- no i cant do that to him. its an au whatever, so yeah MORRO'S in there crystal in hand going after greenie and KAI kicks in yk the brother stuff so theyr fighting anf stuff and like idk MORRO knocks KAI off his feet anf starts heading towards LLOYD again so as a last ditch effort KAI fires towards MORRO and it hits the crystal aaaa ! even thought i cant possibly imagine the crystal being so weak i can just say the power of love made him stronger bc those tight family bonds (im a sucker 4 found famiky but who isnt these days). and then its kinda like the scene in SONIC PRIME where the prism goes boom !! and theres a shockwave and it looks cool and then u see SONIC traversing through the SHATTERVERSE 4 the first time and then he ends up in NEW YOKE, except its KAI landing in the PRIME EMPIRE CITY with all his friends looking different and jazz. the whole mission is to retrive the realm crystal shards and put them back 2gether so he can get home and finish the fight with MORRO. for the og universe i kinda just imagine time stops so 4 the ninja itd look like KAI disappears for a few moments and then comes right back. as i did mention when i was vaugely describing universe 1 (PRIME EMPIRE divergent i hope im usong that word right btw) KAI doesnt stay long in that universe so just like in SONIC PRIME he will return to some universes, whether on purpose or not, to retrieve the shards

i was wondering if i should write a fanfic bc thats what most people seem 2 do but im not really good with keeping up the motivation to write, i used 2 have a miraculous ninjago crossover on ao3 (literally called miraculous bc im unoriginal) but after like 5 updates i did updates like one every 3 months and then deleted it lol so im probably jist going to let this au die when i get tired of it !!!! tbh i need to rewatch ninjago bc im forgetting all my facts (and a SONIC PRIME rewatch not that i really need to but its very good har har)

btw i hope its obvious that my username was supposed 2 be CHERRY, like my name, but i misspelt it and thought it looked cool.

should i make a tag 4 this au ??? its not really hard 2 find it since its pretty much all i post and i dont even know what 2 call it,,, ill just think abt it 4 now :D