#idk how weddings actually go i just guessed with this idea

[radiantinvocation]

You... accidentally became the beasts of deceits spouse???

One moment, you're agreeing to take part in his play as the 'bride' the next you're his actual spouse?

I can imagine that the idea came up when you were getting too cuddly with your friend, Pure Vanilla Cookie. He got oh so jealous that his favorite puppet was showering love and affection to the one who stole his soul jam.

So, like the most brilliant cookie that he is, he organized a wedding act. Where you will exchange rings at the altar. Real rings, may he add! Everyone is invited! His minions, gingerbrave and co. Even dear old Pure Vanilla. Oh yeah, did he forget to mention? Shadow Milk himself will play the part of the groom!

Anddd just to step up his game, you two will sign a 'fake' wedding certificate. All while, dear Silly Vanilly gets to play the part of the wedding officiant that will 'unify' your 'vows'.

You won't be made aware of any of the ceremony being real. That's the fun part! You will only stare at Shadow Milk in confusion as he takes the whole ceremony seriously.

[hanasnx]

baby daddy jason for when the one parent-teacher conference the sweet unassuming teachers like “mrs. Todd” and you’re “uhhh we’re not married”, but Jason, despite not being up to the commitment, likes the idea. He definitely would not correct the teacher like you immediately would.

Actually idk where I was going with this I had an idea but then it kinda stopped soz

MINORS DNI 18+

You’re not even sure how it happened. In your opinion, it’s best that BABY DADDY!JASON TODD stay far away from you and your daughter. Maybe he sifted through your mail the last time he snuck in, maybe he intercepted your calls, maybe he followed her to school to add himself to her emergency contacts—all completely feasible when dealing with someone so meticulously thorough and annoyingly committed. You’re face to face with him outside your daughter’s teacher’s door.

“What are you doing here?” you seethe in a whisper, avoiding a scene.

Jason’s face twists in feigned confusion, pointing to the flyer on the wall. He reads out its words as his finger follows along, “‘Parent teacher conference.’” He points to himself finally. “Parent.” A smug curl forms on his lips, standing tall in outsmarting you even though it’s not what you asked.

Your nostrils flare as you suck in a breath. Unfortunately, Jason is exceptional at getting on your nerves. You wonder how he managed knocking you up. Advancing on him, he mirrors you, meeting you in the middle as you engage him, “Jason, I don’t want you here—“

The door swings open, and you jump in place, leaning away abruptly. Jason coolly inclines back, shoving his hands in his pockets, he’s got nothing to hide. Your daughter’s teacher greets you both with a cheerful grin, beckoning you in. “You made it! Come on in, come on in.” You exchange a warning glance with Jason, but you clutch your purse strap and duck in while he trails leisurely after.

The meeting goes well, the teacher rants and raves about your daughter, especially about her art skills, showcasing that talent with pictures of it. You open your mouth to speak, but Jason beats you to it, “Takes after her mother, huh? What do you know?” he says with pride, and you witness a genuine grin on his lips as he leans forward to take a closer look at the mess of glitter and stickers in the teacher’s hands.

Your heart skips a beat, and you fiddle with your hands in your lap. One reason you try to stay away from Jason is because of times like these. Makes you second guess your decision to end things with him, and that’s exactly what’s most dangerous.

“So, Mrs. Todd—“ the teacher’s voice breaks you from your stupor, gaze snapping up to her as you furrow your brows.

“Oh, we’re not married.” you object, interrupting her starkly, and she flushes, setting the artwork down with a nervous smile.

“Oh! My mistake. You two just seem so close…”

Jason sighs, raising an arm to wrap around the back of your chair. “Well, not yet.” he says with certainty, and you turn your attention to him, glancing at his arm placement and how the sleeve of his biker jacket brushes your hair. His hand cups your shoulder, which you stare at, and glare when he starts stroking your skin with his thumb. What makes you the most angry is not the entitlement to touch you—which he’s always had—but how he’s clearly messing with you on purpose. This is just like his brand of cruelty, embarrassing you further in a social situation. You tune out whatever crap he’s telling the teacher about the fake wedding and you peel his arm away from you, shoving it back into his lap.

“No, that’s not happening.” you object again, harsher this time and Jason merely scoffs through his nose as you deal with the poor confused teacher.

After the meeting, you’re practically corralled out of that room bickering. You somehow end up on the back of his bike instead of in the car you drove here. Somehow, further, letting him inside your place. Shouting over each other about how inconsiderate he is, and how serious you are, curtly removing your outerwear.

“Would it really be that bad?” he yells, that loud voice that gets you weak in the knees booming through your apartment. You’re lucky your babysitter still has your daughter. “Being married to me, would it really be that bad?”

“It’s not about that, Jason! You know that!”

Your objections are drowned out in how his big body herds you into your bedroom, how his hands push you down to rip off your jeans. How he palms your mouth to shut you up while he’s kissing on your neck, clumsily searching for the give in between your legs. His tip eases in as you lazily bat at his hefty shoulders and thick biceps. “Don’t wanna be Mrs. Todd, huh?” You relax under him the longer he’s inside you, rutting into you with patience as you jerk your head away from him. “What’s wrong with that? Don’t want my name? Don’t wanna be a happy little family?”

Your fist bangs against his rotator cuff and he laughs, husky and light in your ear. His teeth latch onto your lobe, playfully tugging on it while he bottoms out, and you emit a noise from your throat.

“Mrs. Todd,” he chides, “So wet for your husband. S’almost like you want it.”

[wafywaify]

im so tired but i want to get this out before i forget. this might end up uncomprehensible byt whatever. anyways.

shen qingqiu. shizun. shen yuan, right? that guy. for some reason i have this really strange itch that just- a singer shen yuan au would cure. like im thinking barbie princess and the pauper type singer au. like he was transmigrated a bit after uh binghes blakening ig. maybe he just got out of the abyss, right? on his way to go torture his shizun and all that gof stuff.

shen yuan was just placed into this npc type guy, not relevant to the plot really. maybe hes a brother to uh one of bingges future wife? but anyways, his family's pretty poor so they do all they can to make a few extra coins. he finds out he has a pretty nice voice from um, singing his little sister to sleep? something sweet like that. his family urges him to give it a try, telling him everyone would love his voice. after getting over his embarrassment, he gives it a shot. I imagine he like tries to remember certain songs from yknow. barbie.. barbie songs. i love Barbie.

and hes all like "well no ones gonna recognize it ill just say i wrote it its fineeee" and then that kind of backfires on him when airplane stumbles upon a random dude singing "i need to know" from the hit barbie movie babrie as the island princess. (im just like you, youre just like me!!) actually it'd be funny if he only sung barbie songs. like theyre just melted into his brain after all the times his little sister had forced him to watch them with her. anyways, they hit it off.. in more ways then one. that sounds like a sex joke, its not. im implying he beat bro up. pidw author and all.

anways uh maybe airplane like helps him out and like they get shen yuan to start performing for like important things. idk. uh. good entertainment for the richer ppl yknow. hes become pretty popular now. its hard to book him, with all the requests hes getting now. now this is where bingge comes in. bro needs a performer for an upcoming.. wedding? i guess? he needs to entertain guests so he books the most popular guy right? shen yuan, upon realizing binghe, the heavenly demon emperor, wants to hire him, absolutely freaks out.

he doesnt want anything to do with the protagonist!! he was living a pretty good life!! and every man that comes into contact with binghe either ends in a gruesome death or are thrown into cellars! thats just how pidw was written!! so obviously, the best course of action is to ignore it! ignore everything! uhhh.. bad idea, really. he basically just sends a letter back saying "haha sorry cant, busy!!!"

and binghe.. binghe does not take that all too well. who would've thought. not shen yuan. who dared ignore the literal emperor!? conqueror of realms??!! and so, he sets out to go see for himself how "busy" this lowly singer is!! que dramatic scene where binghe walks into a pub and theres like at least 50 or so people crowded to the back. hes confused at first, before he hears this almost angelic voice. it seems to wash over the entire pub, entrancing its residents. like a siren calling out.

there isnt exactly a "stage" in this pub, so he cant really see whos singing. he quickly makes his way towards the crowd and pushed his way through. after the people realize who he is, its easy enough. his eyes land on one of the most beautiful humans he's ever seen. his eyes are almost crystal clear in this lighting. a warmish brown, almost orange. his auburn brown hair is fully down, embellished with golden jewels and hair tinsel. a strange look.. but it works on him. and his skin..

before he can ogle anymore, the angelic mans voice tapers off, leaving the crowd disappointed. binghe looks up to see the other staring at him, eyes wide.

might continue this tmr or like fix it up a bit.. but yeah.. singer shen yuan save me.. please i need him so badly. also i love fics that have bingge and shen yuan bickering theyre always so good. i love them being silly in strange ways. part 2!!!

[kedreeva]

#we spoke of this a LOT at work after that one tech was murdered and hidden in a wall

hi!👋 hello! kedreeva! i’m going to need to ask you to explain this!!!!

So back in 2009, a lab student named Annie Le was murdered at Yale university. Cameras saw her going on into a building, but not out again and it was like, the eve of her wedding (or close to? I don't remember) so clearly she had places to be and people waiting for her so they immediately started looking and the next day (or so? Anyway on the day of her wedding) they found her body in a recess in a wall, down in the areas where the research animals were kept. It turns out, a tech had killed her, but since there were cameras like EVERYWHERE, he just, I guess, left her there. Well, hid the body where it was. I don't remember how they caught him, but they did. It was a horrifying story. It still is.

And it was a huge news story among the folks at my workplace because, at the time, I was working at a different university, as an animal husbandry technician. As you can imagine this was a kind of intense time to be in that situation. They started offering, like, I'm not gonna say counseling but it was "if you need to talk we would prefer you talk to us about something wrong rather than kill anyone about it" and as techs (even if we were not even the same kind of tech, the killer was a lab tech and we were husbandry techs but I think a lot of people assumed it had been a husbandry tech since she was in an animal area), we were kind of getting the side eye from lab people for weeks afterwards. Like they thought we were gonna go "wow that's a fantastic idea, you're next!" or something, idk. And I mean like, people would freeze when you were alone in a hallway, or turn and walk the other way, or duck into the nearest room and watch you walk past, and they were all being super nice/civil to us when they did have to interact. It was very atypical behavior for lab people. Like not all of them, some of them had always been nice and weren't worried, but some of the people who had been unbelievable dicks previously were walking on eggshells. And the people who had friends in other universities reported this was happening at their jobs, too.

And instead of talking to The Man (because all the higher ups were garbage at the time), we just. talked among ourselves. It was a lot of "I may say I feel like strangling lab people sometimes when they do things that drive me up a wall but I don't MEAN it you know that right" and it also led to group discussions of what would be a theoretical *better* solution to hiding a body than what happened, with clear disdain for doing things like hiding bodies in walls, which is a terrible idea and one we would never do (looking at the people who think we might have decided this was a great idea actually).

Which consequently led to a lot of supervisors and/or managers that happened to overhear us bringing us donuts or arranging pizza for lunch in like, some kind of bid to help us feel appreciated, I guess, so that we wouldn't murder anyone, even though none of us were going to do that anyway. But also none of us were in a position to turn down free donuts or pizza or whatever.

And then after a few weeks, maybe a month or so, people just kind of forgot and moved on and things went back to normal like fifty people hadn't spent every lunch hour for weeks talking quietly among themselves about how human bodies would definitely fit into a carcass disposal barrel or that you'd have to crush hip bones and/or skulls before incineration. Hypothetically.

Like I said, it was a VERY weird time to be at my job, and every time I remember it happening feels like a fever dream. I can't even imagine what it was like at Yale.

[joaosnovia]

in honour of phonzy and sheyenne getting married , do a jamal fanfic where he and the reader (female..!) are childhood besties but have feelings for each other.

Reader is sheyenne’s bridesmaid and jamal is phonzys best man.

Rest is up to ur imagination 🙏

❦ - for better or for best - JM42

summary : it’s alphonso and sheyenne’s wedding and you and jamal are childhood best friends ; except you guys can’t hide your feelings much longer.

warnings : slight angst & fluff!! AND USE OF Y/N BC IK THAT TRIGGERS SOME OF YOU 😭. alsoooo cussing & jamal is lowkey a bit of an asshole…

writers note : i love this idea sm & this is lowkey short, sorry bae 💔 also ignore how this fic progressively gets more obvious that i’m tired and that this is lowkey rushed 🙏

as the venue started to fill up, it slowly started to get louder and full of excitement, everybody waiting for the bride to walk down the aisle. the air was filled with the smell of flowers as you stood at the front, taking in the atmosphere. you held your bouquet tight, even though you said nothing, your face did. you were noticeably stressed from helping with the wedding and you took it upon yourself to leave the bride relaxed for her big day.

jamal silently stood near you, adjusting his cuff links for what felt like the 5th time that night. usually he’s nonchalant but you noticed that emotion was replaced with something else. to your surprise, even he seemed tensed up by the situation. he caught your gaze and quietly asked, ‘nervous?’.

slightly amused with his stupid question to your obvious answer of a facial expression, you sighed and replied with, ‘take a guess sherlock, what about you though?’

‘nah. i’m calm about it, you know me y/n, i don’t stress ab these things’ he was right. you did know him. and you could read right through him, he WAS stressed, no matter how hard he tried to hide it.

‘okay then. sheyenne is gonna come any second now, get in your place bro.’ seemed to be all you could come up with. usually you’d come up with a different response but you thought it wasn’t much worth the effort.

literally as soon as you said that, the loud, eccentric fanfare blasted through, announcing the brides arrival. sheyenne looked absolutely gorgeous making you smile like an idiot until jamal turned to look at you, smiling too at your sight.

after vows were exchanged, you and the whole bridal party as well as the grooms party were sent outside for photo shoots with the newlyweds.

‘y/n stop tilting your head, make it straight’, the photographer snapped, knocking you out of your daze. you silently complied, painting a forced smile on your face knowing that you’re well and truly burnt out from all the prep. throughout this whole photo shoot you stayed composed until you heard, ‘okay!! best man and maid of honour come, let’s get a photo of you two’

THAT. that’s what really got you out of that daze. you stood next to him as he slid his hand around your waist, instantly making you tense up.

he noticed your sudden change up and whispered, ‘relax schatz (darling/baby), why’re you so worked up, calm down. it’s not like we haven’t done this before, it always happens at family events, nothing different now.’ and to that you simply nodded and got the photos done with.

soon after, everyone was getting on the dance floor until some random guy who even you thought was quite fine, asked you to dance. and to that you reluctantly agreed, seeming that you had no one else to dance with. ofcourse, jamal suddenly appears just as you’re about to go and dance.

‘idk who you are, but i actually asked y/n to dance first, so if i was you i’d move along, listen mate, there’s other women here so don’t get too disheartened.’ jamal murmured, as the guy stayed silent and moved away like an npc. the brown haired boy grabbed your wrists, but you slapped his grip off as you pulled him into a side room

‘jamal what the actual fuck are you doing?? that guy was sweet and you made him go away for no reason. you don’t even want to fucking dance you dickhead why would you do that. it’s like you’re always trying to spite me what did i do to you. you have so many other girls to harass right now, why me man.’ leading you to sigh after ranting and pleading. to your surprise, he didn’t have a smartass answer, instead he just stayed silent and stared at the floor, unable to create a reason behind his stupid action.

‘okay. i’m sorry. i don’t know why i did it, i guess i was jealous. y/n i don’t fucking know anymore. i’m in love with you and i don’t know how else to make it obvious to you at this point. i wanted that to be the last sign but i guess that went wrong.’ to that, it was you who was unable to respond. and to add to that, you felt like a piece of you broke inside when you heard that. how did you not get the signs.

there was a silence that followed as his words hung in the air ‘i’m in love with you.’ 5 words that you couldn’t admit yourself. to be honest with yourself, you didn’t believe it, not that you didn’t want to, but because it seemed too crazy to be real, as if it was like a disney movie. just because you were unable to break the silence, he did it for you.

‘y/n say something. i just told you that im in love with you and all you’re doing is just standing there. hell i’ve been in love with you for years and i don’t want this to ruin what we already have.’, his gaze softening, noticing that you absorbed what he said.

‘so you were jealous of the guy… jamal please this is the wrong time and place to confess this. and what chance do we actually have together. what’s gonna happen if we break up, what’s happening now even? is this gonna fuck up our friendship.’ you rambled with thousands of thoughts at once racing through your mind, your reaction making him grin, knowing you’re considering it.

‘y/n. shut up. just give it a go, please.’ he replied, before you could say anything he kissed you, catching you off guard by a mile. eventually breaking it, leaving you so lost.

‘okay. fine. but we can’t tell anyone till ATLEAST next week otherwise the whatsapp aunties are gonna accuse us of ruining the wedding.’ you randomly blurted, making him giggle a bit

‘sounds like a deal.’ he said in between giggles

[askthefamous8]

Even if I haven't been very active lately, 9 years is still pretty significant- happy birthday to the blog!

So like Percy up there I'm gonna do so dome reflecting. This blog's where I've often done that for some reason, but here's the tl'dr for blog related stuff.

• I would like to keep drawing stuff but feeling generally unsure in myself, and I'm wondering if all the years of fandom harrassment have caught up with me • I have one big project in mind, I've been dipping my toe into what I'd need to do it. No spoilers but it was one of the first things I played around with this series, so do with that what you will • If I can keep myself drawing, I want to use more of the original source material since I'm struggling with original ideas. So stuff like redraws, hOpEfULlY even animatics, just like what originally got me so into trains yknow? Because that's fun and sparks joy. And that always goes down a treat with you guys so bonus • As always I appreciate you guys not coming after me for being so inconsistent

The rest of this is me doing what Percy's doing in the drawing and reflecting, as there is indeed much 2 think about. It's also a little sad and venty so, there's your warning there.

.

Ok so obviously a busy year, we moved into our new house that we actually own, I spent most of the year planning our wedding, and then got married. Big stuff. Also! I came off antidepressants in the summer. I've been on them for...basically as long as this blog, 6 months after I started it I think. Which also means I'd been on antidepressants my entire adult life. Feels like a big deal and I guess I'm still adjusting.

Another big thing, but sad, is that my dog died about two weeks ago. If you follow me on twitter you'll have seen her but she did make an appearance here a few Halloweens ago

I got her when she was 13 and had her 8 years after that. So that's been difficult. Unrelated to that (probably), but I just feel...really mediocre. And before you point out the obvious, this has been present even before I came off antidepressants. But yeah just... mediocrity. In myself as a person, how I look, what I draw, my whole life really (barring my marriage thankfully). What have I achieved? I'm 26, I'm not working, I don't feel well, my art isn't good (I don't think so anyway- like yeah it's technically fine I guess but it's not, and has never been, very stand-out or impressive). And lately art doesn't bring me the same joy it once did, and I'm wondering if all the years of harrassment from this fandom (mostly the twitter side, tumblr's been pretty good to me) has finally caught up with me and put me off the whole thing. Or worse, that I just don't have as much of an interest in it anymore. I don't think I'll ever be like "ok yep I'm officially done with this blog" because I'm so stubborn but idk. I want to make things and be creative, I want to make more train art, but it doesn't feel the same. I don't know what's wrong. What do you listen to? What you want vs what you feel? I still enjoy train stuff, I love going to Awdry Ex every year. It's been like this for awhile. It's not even like I have a strong feeling of what I'd rather be doing as far as careers go. And even if I did, oh yeah I'm sure my two degrees in animation will be very relevant in another field (sarcasm). I feel adrift. My sails are open but there is just no wind. Planning my wedding gave me something to do and work on and just, feel useful but now that that's over I feel lost again. Losing my dog, who had become the center of my life because of how vulnerable she had become, hasn't helped.

On the more creative side of things, I also don't really know what to do with this blog's story either. The show's ended as far as most people are concerned, and I kiiinda wrote myself into a corner because once Thomas turns 18 he's going to leave for university, and that sets off this whole arc with James but basically the problem is it involves characters leaving and for some reason that feels like a no-no here. Don't get me started on the timeline lol. But Thomas works on a railway on Sodor, that's how it has to be...right? I guess I'm sort of at a crossroads of, ok do I want this to be close to the source material, and thus easily digestible to newcombers? Or do I want to make it more and more my thing and distanced from the source material? I doubt there's many new people coming since the series ended. And even then, there's a lot more humanization artists around now than when I started, so it's not like I'm filling a niche anymore. Just to be clear it's fine and also good that there's more humanization artists, variety is good, I just don't feel as "needed" anymore (which is 100% in my head and not an actual role that belongs to me or something). I started this blog when I was 17, so my interests and what I relate to have changed obviously. The character designs certainly have. It's never followed a super rigid story plan, but the core of it has always been the central cast doing things on Sodor. I however have always had a scene/project/animatic/whatEver in mind for when this 'series' would '''officially''' ''''end''''. But then what comes after that? I've always tried to run this blog like they are Real People that You interact with. But in real life there is no ending to the story, there's always more stuff to come. You get married, and it's wonderful, and then life goes on. The credits never roll. So maybe that's what I'm having trouble coping with...the progression of time. Ah, my old nemesis. I've always had trouble with letting go of things. There's nothing to say that I couldn't still draw stuff after the series "ends". I guess any story after Thomas leaves could be like... a sequel series or a spin off or something. Spin-off of a spin-off. Famous 8 All Grown Up. Famous 8 Qurter Life Crisis. Who knows. I certainly don't.

I've also been really into an original project unrelated to this but those don't get as much attention and while I'd like to do something with it one day, I don't feel very confident in being able to make that happen right now. But you know... as far my as art not being super spectacular goes... I think my individual talent has always been is my ideas, like the writing side of things. And then brought to life with my art, which normally isn't anything to write home about but is good enough to convey the idea and be not-awful to look at, lifts both of them beyond what they were individually. Maybe that's what I should focus on. Maybe that's wishful thinking.

So....idk. Idk what I'm doing but I'm trying to be gentle on myself and just let myself continue to drift, to heal from this heavy loss, and then in the New Year I'll try and pick myself up. Then there will be no more big once-in-a-lifetime events coming up, no more just-moved-into-a-house-and-oh-no-there's-a-bunch-of-things-that-need-attention-NOW scenarios, and no more big holidays for awhile. I guess we'll see.

If you read all of this I am so sorry but also thank you for reading my ramblings. And thank you for being around, whether that's been for a few months or for several years, but especially if it's been several years

[plutoccult]

NO ME QUEDA MAS

pairing: hajime iwaizumi x female reader

description: iwaizumi’s wedding day was a day you dreaded for many years. now that the day had finally come, you regret never telling him how you feel.

word count: 1.6k

also available to read on my ao3 here

author’s note: finally, a new theme! i’m on an angst GRIND, you guys. been feeling really unhinged lately thanks to my girl @intorder for giving me fuel for angst, who also beta read this hurt piece. oddly enough, my life has been pretty good lately, so idk why i thought to write this. i’ve never written for iwaizumi before, but he came to mind first when i thought of this idea. this was definitely inspired by that one scene in 13 going on 30, but i made it hurt even more. i hope i did iwaizumi justice, and i hope you all enjoy without crying?

tags: @toorubobatea @intorder @dragon-slayer5 @jeanboyjean @femme-lune @darthferbert @kob3nie @thelazyhuevito @multi-fandom-fanfic @sterieshinso @kiiyomei @chrybdcsm @alienlatteinspace @abonbonblr @luverofutoshi @p3ritwinkle @juuzou13

taglist form here

“well? how do i look?”

iwaizumi turned around to face you as he showed off his suit. you couldn’t believe he was actually getting married today, and that the person he was marrying wasn’t you. it was hellish to shove your feelings down your throat for decades, especially when your friendship suffered god knows how many miles apart.

a part of you died the day he returned from california. you were so thrilled to see him, missing him so, but your heart shattered the second you saw he brought a girl with him. it was even worse when iwaizumi spoke to you about her, saying he felt like he knew she was the girl he would marry the second he saw her. you wanted to be that girl, and maybe you could’ve if you simply spoke up. after all, everyone always teased you two about ending up together growing up.

“you look great, iwa.” you force a smile. it wasn’t a lie, he was the most handsome man you’d ever seen, standing so proud and tall in his suit. not a single scratch or crease on his shoes nor any signs of wear in his jacket. as much as it pained you to see it, iwaizumi had grown up.

“you think so?” he asked, checking himself out in the mirror, scanning for any flaws in his outfit. “i could’ve sworn i saw lint on the back of my jacket.”

“oh, i can get it.” you offer. iwaizumi immediately said “yes, please” and “thank you” before you stood up to help him. his back faced you, shoulders as strong as ever, making this all the more difficult for you. if you were his bride, you probably wouldn’t be seeing him like this right now. it was bad luck to see the bride before the wedding, after all.

“how come your groomsmen aren’t up here helping you?” you ask, cursing yourself in your head for being so nosy.

“i’m sure you can understand i didn’t want oikawa up my ass before i go down there.” iwaizumi chuckled. you force yourself to copy his laughter, pretending as if you found this so hilarious. if oikawa were here, you wouldn’t be ridden with temptation right now. only he could stop you from saying things you knew you’d regret.

“i guess i should feel special then, huh?” you question. “be the first to see you like this…”

“mhm.” he replied, you see him nod in the mirror. “special privileges for my best friend.”

you felt your stomach tie up in knots as he said that. best friend. that’s all you were, that’s all you ever allowed yourself to be. it could’ve been you waiting for him at the altar, but instead you’re helping him get prepared to marry another woman, ready to beg him to run away with you.

you pretend to inspect the back of his jacket, knowing there wasn’t any lint anyway. it was absolutely flawless, just like him. this was torture for you, and you couldn’t stand another second longer.

“listen, iwa…” you begin to say. “i should tell you something before you go down there.”

“oh?” iwaizumi turned around to face you. you felt as if his eyes were piercing through your soul, making your heart race faster than it was before. “what is it?”

“i, um…” you hesitate. was it too late to go back? yes, yes it was. “i think you’re marrying the wrong girl today.”

“huh?” he furrowed his eyebrows.

“i mean, i think you should be marrying me instead.” you blurt out.

“y/n, what are you talking about?” iwaizumi questioned. this couldn’t be real, this couldn’t be happening right as he was about to get married.

“i’m in love with you, iwa. i love you.” you admit, your heart racing upon your confession. you should feel a weight being lifted off your shoulders, but something heavy still lingered on top of you.

“no…” he shook his head. iwaizumi had rejected the possibility a long time ago. even if he loved you just as long as you loved him, you were just too late.

“yes. i am.” you say.

“you’re saying this now?” he asked you. it almost made him want to laugh. life was just so funny, he thought to himself. why couldn’t you have said this before? why did you wait until he was about to get married? if things were different, iwaizumi would be reacting to this much differently right now.

“i know i should’ve told you before you went to california—“

“should’ve? i wanted you to!” iwaizumi interrupted you, much to your shock. “everyone said you were going to before i left! i just figured they were just messing with me afterwards…”

you remember telling oikawa how you felt about iwaizumi, it was his idea to tell him before iwaizumi left for california. you had it all planned out in your head, but as you stood there at the airport, you couldn’t find the words anymore. you chickened out, cursing yourself on the way home and the days that would come. it only made you feel worse when iwaizumi found someone.

what you didn’t know was that he expected your confession that day. you should’ve known oikawa would run his mouth. he always meant well, always hoping you’d end up with iwaizumi, but look at you now, a delusional fool.

“i was going to, iwa. i just got scared…” you confess to him. “if i could go back to that day, i’d do it differently.”

“well, you can’t turn back time, y/n. it’s too late.” he said coldly, almost like a stab to the heart.

“why not?” you ask, desperately clinging onto your delusions.

“i moved on.” iwaizumi replied. he might as well be twisting a knife, even if he was merely speaking the truth. “we've both gone down different paths, we both made choices, and this is what i’m choosing.”

“i just thought…” you began to say, but fall silent.

“just thought what?” he asked, raising his voice. “that i’d give up everything i’ve built for a last minute confession? one that i gave up on waiting for years ago?”

you don’t say anything. what was there to say? it was exactly what that sick part of you deep down expected. how stupid of you to think he would drop everything just because you finally had the courage to confess your feelings. if there wasn’t a whole wedding waiting to happen, maybe iwaizumi would change his mind.

you look away in shame. even if you didn’t speak your thoughts aloud, you still felt disgusted now that the reality of your confession hit you. you were terrible to think this way. not just a terrible person, but a terrible friend too. it was unfair to expect such a tall order out of him, especially now.

“my family’s down there, my soon-to-be in-law’s are down there.” iwaizumi said. “we care about each other, you know?”

“i know.” you say quietly as you bite your lip.

“y/n, you…” he let out a sigh. “you don't always get the dream house… but you get awfully close.”

you look up to meet his eyes, tears streaming down your face. to him, you were always the dream house. if only you had known that before, you thought. iwaizumi felt ridden with guilt rejecting you like this, and it didn’t help that you were crying your eyes out.

“please don't cry, y/n.” he begged you.

“what? no, i'll be fine, i promise.” you force out a laugh, no matter how much it killed you. you saw the look in iwaizumi’s eyes. he knew you weren’t truly okay, but he also knew that you were letting him go. it was the right thing to do.

“y/n…”

“it’s okay. i'm fine.” you wipe away your tears, trying your best to be strong. “i'm just crying because i'm happy. i want you to be so, so happy.”

you did, you wanted him to be happy. even if it wasn’t with you, you owed him the ability to be happy. it was the least you could do while you still had some of your dignity left.

“i love you, iwa.” you barely get the words out. “you… you're my best friend.”

you see iwaizumi’s eyes well up with tears, a rare sight to see. only you could produce such a reaction out of him. only you would truly have his heart forever, but life doesn’t always work out the way you want it to. it was just the way things go.

“i should go. everybody’s waiting for you.” you say, on your way out the door.

“y/n, i...” you stop in your tracks, waiting for what he’d say next, and it only crushed you even more. “i've always loved you.”

overwhelmed, you walk out of the room in tears, ready to bolt out of the venue without another thought. oikawa found you on your way out, asking what was wrong and where you were going, but when he saw mascara running down your face, he knew exactly what happened, and he knew he should’ve been there to stop it.

you insist to oikawa that he tell iwaizumi you were sorry before you finally left the venue. you couldn’t stand to be there a second longer, you just had to get out of here. as you head to your car, you hear the beginning of the wedding march play. the sound brought you to your knees as you violently sobbed. if this was rock bottom, then you finally reached it.

as much as you wanted to cry there forever, you force yourself to get up, finally finding the strength to get into your car. you didn’t know where you were headed, but you knew you had to drive off somewhere far away from here. if only you could just turn back time.

© plutoccult / 310802. please do not copy, repost, modify, or translate any of my content in or outside of tumblr. reblogs are appreciated <3

[awesome-opossum-after-hours]

AT au where instead of Betty, it's actually FINN who sacrifices himself and makes the wish with the crown.

I've seen some au's about Simon doing this, but we're forgetting the secret third option I guess?

now obviously, the loss of Finn will have an impact on most, if not all of the citizens of Ooo. but I'd like to think that Finn's intention is to make this wish, not just for the safety of one person, but to keep all of Ooo safe and free from any more chaos. I've seen some shows where the hero "dies" on the end (though in this case, there'd be the idea that he IS still conscious and able to watch over everyone), and honestly it can be a great ending if played right.

here's how it would go down: Finn, Simon, and Betty are being digested by Golb. they're at the point where Betty and Simon have both returned to their sane, pre-Mushroom War selves and are having their reunion. Finn notices that the crown has reset, and also taking notice that he's not being "digested" because he hasn't changed all that much. he realizes that he has the chance to make a wish, make a true difference in Ooo and ensure the peace and safety of all his friends, something that he's clearly wanted through the whole series. he sees how happy Betty and Simon are now that they're reunited, and begins to put on the crown. when the tunnel opens up, he tells Betty and Simon to leave. he gives them some brief things to tell his friends and family on his behalf. he also tells them to finally get married, and to go on with their lives together. (I'd like to think he also, in Finn fashion, jokingly tells them to name their first kid after him :) )

after some coaxing, and tears, they finally give in and leave Golb. Finn makes his wish, which is "I wish for the power to keep Ooo safe", and merges with Golb in the same style Betry did (idk what he'd be called- maybe "Golbfinn"? a silly name kinda like goldfish lol). Jake would be torn, but I feel like he would also be a bit proud of Finn after a bit of grieving. as Finn said in the episode before (in canon), he used to be all about violence. and now, he's keeping the peace.

Gunther still gets the crown in this universe bc that's just funny

in the little Come Along With Me montage, we'd see the other characters rebuilding the tree house, along with the rest of Ooo that had gotten destroyed. I think they would start to worship Finn actually, he would become the hero that everyone would tell stories about, the stuff of legends. we'd also get to see the Petrigrof wedding! it also flashes forward to about a year or so later, we see that they do, in fact have a kid. a little girl named Fionna, who grows into her namesake and becomes hero- material herself.

:)

[henke-penke]

If Eva was in world tour instead of in the peanut gallery, how do you think Lovers and Fools will play out?

oooooooo inch resting~

There are two ways this would go; Eva replaces Duncan, and Evs competes alongside Duncan. I'm gonna focus on the latter for now. Might come back and do the other but I make no promises.

Eva obviously ends up on Team Chris, and the story stays relatively the same up until after Izzy's elimination in Paris. There, Eva pulls Noah to the side and demands answers. She might not be a genius or the best when it comes to people and making observations, but she knows Noah. And she knows he wouldn't cozy up to Heather just for fun.

And Noah tells her the truth. He's made a deal with both Heather and Alejandro to try to make them both jealous and throw them off their game. The reason he tells is quite simple; Eva hates liars and most importantly, can keep a secret.

Eva will have her opinions on the scheme, because it kinda feels cheaty to her, but is ultimately very 'sure whatever' about it. Mostly because Noah assures her that no real feelings are involved, it's just pretend for the sake of the game and a million dollars.

"I'm not actually crushing on them. And I'm very certain they're not crushing on me either." "Alright. I trust you know what you're doing. Though be aware, I won't come to the rescue when they bust your ass." "Don't worry. That's not gonna happen."

Things continue roughly the same. I think the only real difference would be a quick conversation in Newfoundland where, after having observed the whole Alenoaheather situation, Eva will straight up ask if Noah's sure he isn't actually crushing. Which he will vehemently deny, of course.

On the flight to Greece, when both the Amazons and Team Chris are in first class, Noah will pull Eva to the side and update her on the scheme;

"So, they caught me." "I told you I wasn't going to rescue you-" "Not asking you to. Just letting you know that they're in on it." "... What?" "The scheme. Or I guess it's a fully-fledged alliance now. Either way, the figured out I was tricking them and suggested we work together all three." "Congratulations? Why are you telling me this?" "I... don't know. You were the only one who knew of the original plan, and while this doesn't change how we'll behave since we're keeping it a secret, I figured you should know." "Oh. Well, thanks. I appreciate it." "No problem."

So yeah, Eva knows they're in an alliance. She doesn't know the specifics or their schemes because I don't think she'd care that much about it. I also don't think she'd intervene much, aside from telling Duncan to back off when he's snapping at Noah, and calling him out for his bullshit in Sweden.

Now, I have no idea how Eva gets eliminated in this. My first thought was China, but that would take away a major scene for Courtney, so idk. We're skipping it for now. All that's important is that Eva makes it to the wedding challenge at least. There, much like he did with Heather and Cody, Duncan will approach Eva to try to convince her to vote for Noah with him. He's convinced Noah's a master manipulator, and even crosses the line and questions the legitimacy of Noah and Eva's friendship. Eva is having none of it and tells him to fuck off.

However, Noah failed to give her a crucial update before her departure; the cheating plot. Because as established, Noah falling in love, especially under these circumstances, exasperates his self-destructive behavior, that's part of why the plot happens in the first place. It's therein not unreasonable to assume it slipped his mind.

This then leads us to Eva arriving on the aftermath set, and being greeted by the bombshell that is the villain-Noah-narrative. And that shit activates her fight or flight. Every interaction she's had with Noah is put into question. Hell, even Duncan's fuckass attempt to 'trick' her is put into question. Eva ends up stuck between both sides. Noah is her friend. He trusted her enough to tell her his plan way back when, and even updated her when needed. But, can she really trust he was fully honest ? Is it really outside the realm of possibilities that he was lying for his own benefit ? That Heather and Alejandro had never actually caught onto him ? But would Noah really be capable, or willing, to emotionally manipulate people ?

Only one surefire way of knowing.

Thus, when Noah arrive, before Geoff can truly stir the masses, Eva tells him to shut the fuck up. And Geoff does. Eva then lays it out exactly how she feels to Noah, no exaggerations, and no sugarcoating.

"I don't trust the narrative they're presenting. I don't. But right now, I don't know if I trust you either. Until Heather or Alejandro or both get here and can vouch for you, stay away from me."

Noah will be visibly hurt by this, but is understanding and so agrees. His depressive episode here won't be as severe as it is in the fic, but he'll still turn to isolation as a 'coping mechanism'. Izzy will make her reappearance earlier and make it her duty to ensure he actually eats and has some form of company. Noah will also not have his breakdown, but he will still worry about the legitimacy of his new relationship, venting to Izzy how Alejandro and Heather can very easily throw him under the bus and leave him with nothing.

Eva's confrontation will also sow seeds of doubt with the rest of the cast. Like, maybe there's more to the story than what we're told. This is further solidified when it's time for the aftermath, which Noah attends. This is where the continues the villain role and there is a noticeable difference between him off and on camera.

(This is also where we'd get the hilarious bit from the original reblogs where, when asked to pick a contestant to root for, Noah would pull out a chair and sit between Heather and Alejandro's bleachers. "I couldn't choose on the plane, what makes you think I will now?")

When Heather and Alejandro arrive they have to restrain themselves from immediately running up to Noah. He also has to nod to the cameras like 'not yet not yet they're still rolling'. However, the second Chris ends the episode, it's polycule hug time babey !! Heather hugs normally and then Alejandro tackles them. It's cute, fluffy, and all-around a fun time.

The rest of the cast is a bit confused, but things are quickly cleared up. Chris and Blaineley has their argument but it isn't as intense as in the fic. All the apologies still happen after the finale, but before the final aftermath, because Noah doesn't faint here nor was he treated half as poorly, so there's time to spare and not the same levels of animosity between the cast.

For the final episode, they all act like the off-screen reveal didn't happen, Noah keeping to the villain role, with Heather and Alejandro as the unsuspecting heroes. Now, I'm unsure if Chris will have the scheme reveal happen on the volcanoes or save it for the aftermath, but the reveal will happen trust.

And that's that ! Snipp snapp snut, så var sagan slut !

Yeah, whether she's in the game or not, Eva is important to the story of Lovers and Fools <3

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

am i the asshole for cutting off my mentally unstable friend without any explanation whatsoever?

(🧠🌩️ so i can find it)

tw for abuse and cheating mentions

ok typing out that title makes me feel like i might be TA to, like, some degree but just hear me out first.

i (19, f) was in my first semester of college when i met rachel (20). we shared a class and grew to be friends over our shared nerdy interests. i admittedly didn't really like her that much at first and didn't consider her to be that close of a friend. she was really just someone to talk to when class got boring or we had a break or something.

i was actually kinda regretting talking to her at all because i clocked that she was a little unstable almost immediately; she was very quick to anger and constantly talked about fighting people that had ""wronged"" her (which included our professor who she was convinced was out to get her for some reason?? idk why our prof was a really nice lady), constantly trauma dumped without asking (i'm talking like early into our relationship too. first day we met she was ranting about her abusive mother and her childhood trauma and stuff), and always found a way to turn the focus of the conversation about her any time i tried to talk about myself or anything that wasn't our shared interests. the only reason i gave her my number is bc she asked for it and i didn't know how to turn her down without hurting her feelings--i'd been planning on ghosting the second our class ended.

so we continued to talk/text for like a year and (at her insistence) met up for lunch in between class the following semester. i warmed to her a little at this point so it wasn't too bad; at the very least her constant drama gave me something to talk about with my real friends, and like i said i didn't really know how to cut her off in a way that wouldn't start something.

so time goes on and she shuffles through a few boyfriends--all who either cheated on her or were inattentive/verbally abusive. she constantly asked me for advice, which was confusing bc she never listened to it? like she asked me if she should take back her ex who cheated on her 3x and i said "no that sounds like an awful idea" and then she exploded at me and screamed that i could 'go fuck myself' and to 'stay the fuck outta her business bc it's her fucking life and not mine'. but then the minute he (predictably) cheated on her again and dumped her guess who had to sit with her on the phone for 2 hours while she cried? yep. me!

this kinda bullshit continued all the way up to a few months ago. she met a new guy, told me all about how he was "the one" and "he's gonna be different this time" blah blah blah. at this point i genuinely stopped giving a fuck about her and her problems. the only reason i hadn't cut her off was because my other friends loved hearing about her drama secondhand and i admittedly did enjoy making fun of her with them. which i know is kinda shitty but at least she'll never find out about it?

anyways, shit starts to get particularly juicy bc two months into rachel's relationship with this new dude he proposes. and she accepts (?!!) not only that but she informs me (not asks. INFORMS) me that i will be a bridesmaid. and i panicked and just said "uhhh cool i'm so happy for you!!" so this is the point where i decide that i need to end this relationship bc having to attend her wedding is just not something i wanna be apart of and i felt that if i went through with that it would solidify our ''friendship'' in her mind and i'd never be rid of her.

so i stop responding to her texts as frequently and began ducking her calls. didn't have to stop initiating bc i never initiated convos with her in the first place. i'd answer every once in a while bc she would start spamming that she was having ""emergencies!!!"" which. they never were true emergencies; she just wanted to vent about her fiance and his shitty family or something his ex-wife did to piss her off (her fiance was like 20 and divorced twice with three kids. YIKES) and i'd listen until she got tired of talking and ended the call. not once did she ever ask about me btw. at this point she wasn't even to pretend to care about me or my life; i was just her dumping grounds for all her trauma and venting.

i thought she might've got the message that we were done bc she hadn't texted for like a month, but a few days ago i recieved a message that said something like "omg i haven't heard from you in a while, are you okay??" and. i'm not sure if i can put into words the sheer amount of exasperation and annoyance those words filled me with. like i could tell right off the bat it was just a ploy so she could get me talking and then vent and saddle me with all her stupid emotional bullshit. so i blocked her, finally. this shouldn't cause any problems bc she dropped out of school last semester (she was failing so she decided to start her own business).

the thing is, i know that she's mentally not well. she is very erratic and immature, add that to the fact that she's gone through a lot of trauma throughout her life and the end result is a deeply flawed person. at the same time i'm not responsible for her mental health and continuing to play friends with her what i don't even like her in the first place seems disingenuous. but she's got abandonment issues, so me doing this is probably gonna hurt her. although me being honest and saying that i can't stand her and her drama anymore probably wouldn't feel any better.

AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[matan4il]

911 ep 706 first watch reactions

Buck and Eddie setting up the bachelor party are so funny. They're married to a degree that the bride and groom can only aspire to one day achieve. And Madney are raising a kid together! Then again, so are Buddie, and have been since day 2... (day 1 is forever Buck ogling Eddie at the station, and Eddie strutting his stuff for him, with Buck's now canonically jealou-traction being the, ummm, lubricant)

Oh, Tommy just arrived, Buck and him have done nothing but hug, and Eddie's already bringing on the jealousy jealou-traction. IDK what is the etiquette about bringing your date to a bachelor party, but what's the rule about bringing your hubby who's jealous of your bf?

Oh, and an extra jab at Buck bringing Tommy officially as his date to the wedding. I love me a jealous Eddie. My dude, your closet is shaking so hard, it's about to push you out of itself if you don't make the move already.

Okay, in all seriousness, Tommy not dressing like the 80's, Buck showing that he really cared about that silly party theme, Eddie rolling with it, the two of them being dressed more as a couple than the actual guys dating, Buddie seeing things so much in the same way (down to both seeing themselves as the same character from Miami Vice) while Buck and Tommy are totally out of sync... I love that Tommy is there to help Buck figure himself out, but also, this is the stuff that will forever keep me shipping Buddie.

I know the flashback is mainly to show that the bachelor party is Buck's idea, and goes against Chim's wishes, but Eddie suggests the couple costume? And Buck was so readily on board? Even when he knew Tommy would also be invited? This is my house catching fire, while I sit here, mumbling to myself how fine it all is...

Okay, everyone leaving the bachelor party, even the guy Buck is dating, while Eddie stays, sure is something. And by "something" I mean "a couple." That's a couple. That's Buck's partner in everything, even dumb ass 80's costumes and failed bachelor parties, he's the one who jumps in whatever stupid plan Buck comes up with, and stays to deal with the mess.

LOL And then we got some REAL mess. Again, dumb Buck idea, and Eddie just rolling with it. Making it worse even, by suggesting how to take the party (made up of people who don't even know the groom) to Chimney. These two deserve each other. XD

Buck was behind Eddie while his shirt was being torn? Presumably helping with the tearing? That's it, 911 does not want me to make it to the end of the season with my sanity intact. I guess it's good that I'm not even trying...

I'm glad there was a representation of Chim and Kevin, and a Korean tradition, I just hope it was a truthful one. (do we have Korean viewers in our midst to chime in on this?)

Maddie using her 911 skills to find and help Chim is pretty badass (and a nice gender reversal of the 'damsel in distress needing to be saved a sec before her wedding' tale). Love it!

Maddie and Chim looked so happy during their wedding. Honestly, at the end of the day, my little hopelessly romantic heart doesn't need more than that. <3

Awwww, the Buck and Tommy kiss was nice. I think the most important part of it is we got to see Buck for the first time daring to kiss another guy, rather than wait to be kissed. I may bbe a Buddie shipper, but I think this r/s is important to Buck as well, to his ability to find what he wants, to not be scared of it, to not wait for others to want him as was the case with all the women he'd dated, but rather figure out what he wants in a certain moment, and that it's okay for him to go get it.

(I still don't think Tommy is Buck's endgame, though. Much as his probably my fave Buck r/s so far other than Eddie. Tommy not being there for Buck when the bachelor party flunked, him not being there at the wedding itself, to share this significant moment with Buck, being almost incidental to Buck's coming out to his colleagues and parents, other than being a gay that was obviously kissed by Buck just a short while ago... Again, just not the stuff great love stories are made of)

Hen going, "Finally!" to Karen was funny and cute. Everyone (almost) just smiling at Buck's coming out was nice. But the way his mom reacted in particular felt more realistic, and made me wish that at least with his parents, who we know he has a strained r/s with, the should would have allowed this to be more explored. Hopefully in a future ep if not now.

Thank you for reading! If you're looking for more, you can find my s7 reactions tag here, and more of my Buddie meta and content in my pinned post. xoxox

[eddiewithcat]

losing my mind a bit, and need to try and get my thoughts in order BUT!

there is just.. something to be said with this season, and how they constantly like to reaffirm for us buck’s place in christopher’s life.

literally starting off the season with eddie opening up to buck about chris and him dating multiple girls at once, asking buck to talk to him (instead of simply asking him for advice to handle the situation, or even asking his girlfriend who- is a girl and would probably be better in that department! but anyway!).

and then showing us buck’s jealousy of chris thinking tommy is “so cool” (we all know now where that stemmed from, but i am still convinced he was confusing a bunch of feelings at once- and even oliver has said buck had no idea what / who he was jealous about!), and when tommy goes over to talk to buck about the basketball court incident- tommy tells him just how much christopher “can’t shut up” about him. and not to forget buck’s face when he says that and how it lasted a few seconds longer than it probably should have

…. and now; whatever the fuck is going on with helen and ramon coming to visit. my money is on abuela getting / feeling sick after the wedding (hence why eddie is still in the same shirt he wore to the hospital wedding in that still of him and chris that we got- also looks like he possibly could’ve been crying)

i am not super sure what the heck is going on there but i have a silly theory that my friend and i kind of came up with! we do not have strong evidence supporting it btw- this simply just based on what we have seen thus far and how the season has been playing out!

but since eddie will most likely be busy being by his abuela’s side- he would want someone to watch after chris for him. our best guess? buck, of course! it would also explain why he seems to be filming the same time as everyone else involved- and plus it could be the perfect opportunity to bring the ‘will of it all’ into play.

i could see two things going on with this; helena says something in a spur of a moment out burst along the lines of like, “you cannot keep leaving your son with a stranger” and eddie can say something like “he’s not a stranger, he’s family” and that can somehow lead into the will reveal! (because i do see helena being the problem here- people have pointed out many times now that ramon is the only one it seems to be putting in any effort into having a relationship with his son, where as it’s crickets from helena! also she was the first one to be defensive about shannon but anyway!)

OR!

and just a heads up: this is not me bashing tommy at all, i actually do enjoy his character and love what he has done / is doing for buck! this is simply speculation and also just a bit of fun!! no harm in silly theorizing!

i could see tommy perhaps noticing how often buck is watching after chris, and maybe he just brings up something about like, oh hey i thought eddie’s parents were in town… are they not able to watch after him? (in a nice way!! idk how the hell to word things but i do not think he would be a dick about it 😭 like he would just genuinely be asking!) and then somehow that conversation leads to the will and how eddie trusts buck more than anyone etc …

needless to say i just think there is. Something. There. and i have sooooo much hope in the will being brought up. based on how many times they brought it up in interviews, and sort of alluded to in the show as well (“you don’t seem to have trouble committing to certain things” you all know where your mind went!)

anyway that is all. thanks for reading this mess if ya did <3

[harryforvogue]

hello welcome back to me writing out some ideas that will never become actual full stories. this was super fun because i've never written the bodyguard trope. i won't be writing more for this, but isn't this so fun???? hope you like it! (if the French is wrong, that's on me) 2.5k idk

***

France, 1843.

The tavern will do for the night.

It’s inconspicuous, a perfect hiding spot. In fact, now that she’s been in her room for the past three hours, it’s safe to say that if anyone were to come looking for her, they’d be long gone by now. That’s why she changes into a fresh outfit (provided by the very nice hostess who got teary eyed by the story she made up.) She’s now in a simple dress, much better than the other outfit. After all, it would be weird to be traipsing around in a wedding dress.

Her family went all in for the dress too. She’s going to hold on to it, see how much money she can make from it.

She comes down the stairs quietly. At nearly sunset time, the bar is starting to get crowded. She can definitely get mixed into the wave of people, giving her more cover. She expected several people to come in around this time anyways. Despite it being 4 in the afternoon, the winter allows for the sun to retreat earlier. The visibility outside must be terrible, and with a snowstorm on top of that, the only people coming into the tavern will be loyal customers and those sheltering from the weather. 

Of course, her family is too highly opinionated to stop at a measly little tavern like this.

She skips off the last step and looks around. She's picked an excellent spot.

When she sits at the bar, it takes only a minute for the bartender to catch her eye. “Une bière.”

He retreats to pour her drink, and then slides it across the wooden bar.

She catches it and smiles sweetly at him. Then relaxes into her seat and listens to the music.

What a disaster of a day. The whole town will be talking about it tomorrow: the runaway bride. Well, maybe not this town. No, this place is smaller, and less wealthy. They care little for the problems of the rich folk.

The minutes pass by in silence and peace. That is, until the bartender comes by with another drink that she definitely did not ask for.

“Ça vient du monsieur,” the man says.

She looks over to where he's gesturing.

Sitting at the end of the bar is a man she’s all too familiar with. His curls aren’t wet with snow, nor are his clothes, which suggest he’s been here for a long time. Has he been waiting for her out? Did he follow her the moment she left the chapel, or was it that his guess was just correct? Pure luck maybe. Regardless of the how, what matters is that he knows where she is, and he answers her scowl with a smile of his own, lifting his glass in the air as if to toast her attempts at escaping him.

“Merci,” she grits to the bartender. She turns back to her drink, trying to come up with a plausible story before Harry makes his way over. The thirty seconds it takes Harry to show up, though, is simply not enough. 

He sits on the vacant seat beside her. He slides his mug over and lightly taps hers. “Fear not,” he says in English, grinning with his dimples on full display, “I’m here alone.”

Harry’s been her guard for several years. He’s young, barely 3 or 4 years older than her. He rarely speaks with her, but he’s always there when she goes out, even when she’s with her fiancé. He was posted with her years ago when her father gained some political opposition, out of fear she’d get in harm’s way. Thanks to Harry, that’s never happened.

Suffice to say, she’s less than happy to see him here.

Normally, he’s a nice face to look at. All handsome and diligent. He stands nearly half a foot taller than her, always dressed in nearly all black. He has women fainting over him. She, too, can admire his beauty. 

But she’s not going to tell him that.

“As if an army of my father’s men would frighten me,” she replies back.

“Aren’t you glad to see me? Out of all the guards that could have been here searching for the runaway bride, aren’t you happy that it’s me and not another?”

“I’d be more happy to see my fiancé.”

Harry raises an eyebrow. “Is he still your fiancé?”

“I mean, I still have the ring on my finger.”

“Would have figured you’d pawned it off by now.”

She narrows her eyes at him. “Are you going to force me to go back? Because let me tell you, I’m going to put up a fight. I will scream bloody murder if you touch me.”

Harry looks amused now. He rests his chin on his palm.

“That is quite a plan. It’s easy to see how you could be so creative about running away too. Let’s talk about it because I do feel the need to give you kudos, mademoiselle. Not only did you persuade your father to have a winter wedding, but you also picked out the most expensive fabrics and gems for your big day. You convince your fiancé that you love him and then leave him in the church where everyone is supposed to witness a holy union. You thoroughly humiliated him. Excellent scheming.”

He actually does seem impressed.

She doesn’t say anything.

“And to answer your question,” he continues. “I don’t plan on forcing you to go back. In fact, I was actually anticipating this.”

“Anticipating this, how?” She doesn’t want to be on the defense, but he’s acting strange. Too comfortable. 

He rolls his head back and looks at her incredulously. “You may not see me at all times, but as your guard, I do keep my eyes on you. And it’s a wonder how other people didn’t notice. The way your smile dropped at the mere mention of him, the way you had to leave the room with a pitiful excuse every time he showed up. The way you refused to let him kiss you after he very kindly walked you home all the time. Almost difficult to watch.”

She feels her face burn. “You’re not supposed to spy on me.”

“That is my job. I get paid for it, so I might as well be thorough, no?” He’s smiling again.

“All those things mean nothing. It was a last minute decision to run away.” She tilts her head back and finishes her ale.

“Ah, that I know. It was the most surprising part when you didn’t show up. I knew you would pull something like this, make an excuse of some kind. I anticipated that – but I didn’t anticipate it happening on your wedding day.”

“I wasn’t going to wait for an annulment. Don’t know if that would even be possible. And who'd want to marry me after that anyways. Running away was my best option.”

“He’s absolutely distraught, by the way. He’d be very unhappy if he knew we were talking like this. We’ve become friends of some sort.”

“Why would he be upset about us speaking?”

The incredulous look comes back. “It pains me that you don’t know how jealous your little fiancé is. You have such little awareness.”

“Jealous?” She suddenly laughs. “Oh please. As if he has anything to be jealous about.”

Harry finishes his drink and then orders another round for them. As he does, she takes him in. He’s in his black vest, white long sleeved shirt, with an undone white cravat, his jacket tucked away somewhere in the bar. He taps his perfectly polished boots against the floor, pristine black trousers fitting nicely around his strong thighs. His trousers are always perfectly fitted, unlike the rest of her guards. Or maybe she’s just spent a lot of time looking at him.

“He has plenty to be jealous about, mademoiselle.”

“All my attention has been on wedding planning and such for weeks now. I haven’t had the chance to even talk to another man.”

He glances back at her when she’s looking down at his thighs. He’s silent for a moment, but then says quietly, “Not all jealousy has to come from interacting with a man. It could just be from the way you look at one.”

Her eyes jump back to his face. His eyes are narrowed as if trying to figure her out. “He has nothing to be jealous about,” she repeats.

“He doesn’t?”

“As horrible of a woman I am for leaving a man at his own wedding, I’m not the type of woman to betray him, even though I don’t feel any particular affection for him. I respect him and myself.”

“I don’t think it has anything to do with respect, mademoiselle. It’s about desire. After all, you should desire the man you’re marrying, is that not true?”

“Yes, and that’s why I’ve run away.”

“And if you were to desire someone else, it wouldn’t be betrayal, given you’re no longer his intended.”

He says it so casually, but she sees the way his eyes slip down to her mouth for a brief second. 

“I still have the ring.”

He glances at her hand. “Will you keep it?”

“Not planning on it.”

“And until then, you’ll stay faithful to a man you have no intention of marrying? Forgive me, I can’t seem to make sense of this logic.”

She thinks about how much she should tell him. He’s had it figured out, it seems. Maybe she wasn’t as good at hiding her true feelings about the union. Or maybe Harry’s just watched her too closely.

She says, “Are you really not going to take me back?”

Harry shakes his head. “What good would that do?”

“My father would appreciate it.”

“Your father has overlooked many things that I think have been worth appreciating over the span of my career as your dutiful guard, mademoiselle.”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

Harry doesn’t say anything. He simply watches her, as if she’ll understand him just from his expression. She doesn’t.

“Tell me,” she demands.

“I’ve done things that deserve recognition, that is all.”

“Like what?”

He narrows his eyes. “Like keeping you alive for the past four years, you ungrateful wench. With all the stupid decisions you make on a daily basis, I should actually be getting a fucking medal for managing to keep all your limbs in tact.”

The way he says it is so sudden and harsh, she can’t help but laugh. 

“Funny, is it?” he grumbles.

“Hilarious. So, what type of recognition would you even have liked for keeping me alive?”

“It doesn't matter now, I think. Surely I’ll lose my job for not getting to you in time and bringing you back.”

She sits up straighter. “If I were to be brought back, what do you think you’d deserve for it?”

He sighs. “I shouldn't say.”

“I want to know.”

“You’ll hate me.”

She smiles real wide. “So what?"

He contemplates it for a moment. Finishes his second drink and then drums his fingers on the bar top. His knee gently brushes against her skirts beneath the table. “Did you know that before your father picked him to marry you, he had one of the other guards draft a list of eligible men?”

Her expression sours. “There was a list? How disappointing.”

“Mhm. It wasn’t a very long one.”

“What does this have to do with my question?”

He looks at her, unblinking. “If I were to bring you back to your father, and you still had to marry, I would like to be considered on that list.”

Everything falls away. Her smile drops, and her heart beats hard in her ears. Harry doesn’t look away from her, watching every expression take over her face. Surprise, worry, and then…

“Oh.”

The corner of his mouth twists. “Right. And a part of me wishes I’d throw you over my shoulder and drag you back to him. Just to be considered, even for a mere moment. Long enough for there to be a mental image of you and I at the altar in your father’s head. I’d be pleased with even a mere thought if it’s the only time we'd ever be together. But that wouldn’t be fair, would it?”

“No.” Though the thought of being draped over that shoulder is more than enough to get her knee bouncing under the table. Her leg jostles his.

“And of course,” he says, smiling tightly, “you are loyal to your man because of that ring.”

They both look down at the gem. It gleams in the light. 

Harry’s eyes dart back up to hers. He watches her for several long seconds before he reaches out.

With slow movements, he takes her hand. “Unless…” he murmurs, resting her hand on top of his knee. He gently twists the ring off her finger and drops it into his pocket. She keeps her hand on his leg.

Could he be trying to get her to make a move? She’ll be truly guilty if she advances first, but he doesn’t seem to be pulling away either. She holds her breath.

What she ends up saying is, “You said that as my guard, you’ve always needed to keep your eyes on me.”

“Yes.” His gaze is heavy. Dark.

“Even when I didn’t need you to?”

“I always looked out for you. I always will. It’s become second nature to me.”

That makes her feel a certain way. A way she’s never felt in her life. Her breath catches. 

"You do deserve something for that," she says softly. She carefully squeezes his leg, right above his knee.

His jaw visibly tenses.

Harry leans in, and this is when she realizes he’s moving first. He takes a hold of her chin and tilts it up, eyebrows drawn together as if he’s really trying his best to stay away but can’t. He brings his head down. He whispers her name and her body caves, leaning into him.

For the first time in her life, she's excited about kissing a man. Her impatience suddenly surpasses the limit. She puts her other hand on his knee and pushes herself upwards to meet his kiss.

Just before his mouth touches hers, the bartender returns with a gruff, “Il est tout à fait inapproprié de le faire ici. Allez dans votre chambre.” 

Harry pulls away, just barely, and looks down at her through his eyelashes. He keeps a hold on her face. “Shall we?” he asks her, ignoring the bartender. 

She swallows roughly. His eyes are drenched with desire, her heart pounding away in her chest. She licks her lips, enjoying the way he follows the movement.

He whispers, “I’ll be nice, darling.”

Excitement spreads through her like wildfire. She balls her hands into fists and takes a deep breath. “Come.”

He smiles then, and it takes her aback. As he stands, he genuinely looks pleased. Relieved even. As if he’s been waiting for this chance. He takes her hand and tells her to lead him to her room. 

And when he presses her against her door, hands tangled in her hair, a searing kiss placed onto her mouth, she realizes this is what it’s supposed to feel like.

[beabnormal24]

As a early gift for my ln4 fans moots going through hell and back here is a snippet of my norrussell wip with teacher!Lando and father-of-a-student (Kimi)!George:

Lando Norris/George Russell, rated M, Idk how many words honestly sorry

Carlos raises his eyebrows, his reflections mimicking him in an instant. “Do you want my sincerest opinion?”

George sighs, pursuing his lips. He doesn’t know which of the five Carlos he should look at. “Hit me with it, then.”

He ends up on the third reflection. “I think you are very stressed and that you should allow me and Alex to take Kimi for a night and just- I don’t know, you should probably download Tinder.” And then, a blink later. “Or Grindr.”

Admittedly, George had thought about it, even if it had been just in passing, one of those thoughts he only dared to focus on when he was in bed and feeling a bit more lonely than usual.

It’s not like he necessarily needs company, Kimi is more than enough to fill up his days. But it is true that sometimes he wishes to talk to an adult about his things, to say more than one bad word, even the one with the F.

Carlos and Alex are amazing friends, but he won’t deny that sometimes the loneliness becomes even heavier around them, especially with how the wedding preparations have by now become the central topic of any conversation.

Maybe it’s not so much of a bad idea, although he knows he’ll have to fight the guilt of leaving Kimi at somebody else’s house. It has never quite sat right with him.

“You think?” He asks, tracing his finger along the stitches of the sofa.

“Yes I do.” Carlos sighs, switching the black shoe for another brown one, varnished. It looks good, though George would rather go without the laces. “So?”

“I think you should try with a grey shirt, you know, like the stripes.”

“Sounds good.” Carlos hums, doing another twirl to look at every angle of his own feet.

The four reflections run with him, eager.

—

George only thinks about it for a total of a day before he caves in.

He does it sitting on his couch, a glass of red wine in his left hand, a few hours into the deep sleep Kimi fell into after an entire evening of eating popcorn and watching movies.

It is rare that George gets to have moments like these. Usually, he’s always too tired to do anything but fall face-first into his own bed. But there’s an uncharacteristic thrum of excitement under his skin.

His phone is just laying there on the arm of the couch, screen black. And George thinks about the guy he dated during college before Kimi’s mum, the one who had made him touch the sky with just his-

There’s no harm in doing it, anyway, George muses. It’s nothing but a trial, a tentative attempt, nobody's ever been hurt from simply trying something like this before. There’s nothing ominous happening as he downloads the app.

He uses a few pictures his sister took of him from last summer, the ones with the blue swim trunks, half decent. The tan suits him, he guesses, and his body looks great.

He only keeps the lower half of his face in the frame, making sure to hide anything more revealing, and no Kimi in sight, of course. He just leaves his name George, 29, looking for new acquain- frien- company.

It sounds a bit lame, if he has to be honest, but he just takes another sip of wine and presses end.

The first profiles are… Well, not that great.

They all look like they’re trying to show more than what they can actually offer, a bit too much of muscles, only interested in soccer and nothing else, some of them just ‘strict bottoms no topping at all never in my life’ and- eh, George is not exactly interested in that, either.

Some look too sketchy to be real people, some are just passing by the city, some others are clearly stating that it’s going to be for fun, and nothing more, because they already have a wife at home and- George is just terribly disgusted by that, almost decides to just close the app and deem the attempt a failure.

He thought that dating apps were made for that: dating, in fact. But it seems like the more he falls into this loophole of scrolling right, right, right, the more the situation gets worse.

And then the picture of a guy who could as well have his dad’s age is substituted by a body, to say, interesting.

George hums in amusement, takes another sip of his wine. He’s starting to feel a bit tipsy, his head swaying in endless circles of numbness, or maybe it’s just the picture filling his screen that makes him suddenly feel so hot under the collar.

It’s a great body, undoubtedly, well defined muscles, very fucking great biceps. There’s moles scattered around his basically hairless tan skin, and George imagines tracing them with his tongue, biting at the perky dark nipples.

It’s something that he would do with a lover, probably, take his sweet time, make them fall apart with his mouth. He wouldn’t mind having a lover with such a good body.

The next picture shows his lower stomach, and George has to actually adjust his position for a moment before he melts off the couch.

There’s more hair on his groin, dark and curled, but they’re still trimmed neatly. The guy obviously cures himself, and he also obviously has an insane ego with it, given how he’s gripping at the base of his dick with one half-in-frame hand, veins popping in his forearms.

Hot, alright, he definitely has George chained to the seat.

The next picture is even more revealing, though, with the guy standing in front of a foggy bathroom mirror, the muscles of his core thigh, his cock laying hard on his flat stomach, the tip reaching above his belly button.

The intentions are clear, and George falls into the trap like an idiot, his own dick aching between his legs, eager. The guy’s erection is- huge, okay he can’t deny it.

Thick, long, very pink, very inviting, and George thinks about taking it into his mouth, touching it. Gosh it has been so long, and this stranger looks so hot, George is just human he can’t-

The glass of wine almost spills. Having to deal with a toddler of his own does help with reflexes, though, which means that George catches it before it can reach the carpet.

“Fuck, fuck-“

Unfortunately, it does not mean that it can erase the last picture off his mind, Lando’s big face covering the screen, green eyes staring into the camera like he was fucking made for it. That body belonged to him, apparently, and those arms and those moles and that beautiful di-

Which means that George was thirtsting on Lando, in fact. Lando as in his son’s teacher, the guy who almost made him scream the other day.

Hot shame immediately fills his belly. He uninstalls the app.

[thrandilf]

okay. for the first time in my life I'm using the #tdp critical tag because I have some things to get off my chest about s6 and I desperately need to focus on an exam for tomorrow and can't and idk I feel slightly out of my mind/wondering if this really is just a me problem but like

this season felt kind of sparse to me regarding character interactions outside of duos they wanted to focus on/letting characters present react to situations. stuff like Amaya not having a comment about Callum not being at her wedding or the Celestial Elves really not having much to say about Aaravos himself despite the Elder theoretically having been around in the days pre imprisonment like

I don't mind that Viren died but I do feel out of my MIND that he and Ezran didn't actually get a conversation, and beyond that that Viren didn't try to pass along any Aaravos information to anyone, and that even if Soren and Viren's relationship was just Maxed Out that we didn't get Opeli and Ezran talking about what to do with him (could've even had Soren walk in and do a Callum S4 moment of 'you ever walk into a room and everyone goes quiet and you know they were talking about you' moment), Opeli reacting/checking on Soren while Viren was imprisoned even if he didn't want to talk to her, there being any verdict about Viren at all and we're never getting anything else out of him again which is why no Ezran and by extension Callum/Rayla/ect feels sort of disappointing to me, as he hasn't interacted with Callum since S1

It's a really good moment, don't get me wrong, but we traded the suspense of thinking Viren had perhaps killed Soren for us getting any last words or gesture from him to Soren face to face

the Celestial Elves gave us info on Startouch Elves in general but not on Aaravos specifically even though the Elder I thought would know more? They aren't surprised at the idea of trying to kill a Great One/Aaravos but there wasn't even a word of warning about if he does get loose or anything Specific about the last time it happened or, if they didn't know anything, confusion about why a Great One is imprisoned like idk

no one had any concern either when getting access to the stars which again, idk, I thought Callum might've been more worried about Aaravos being at the Starscraper and the prison (when he thought he had it) being surrounded by Aaravos's main connection but idk, it didn't matter but I thought it could have

ALSO THE STAVES. HELLO. AT THE STARSCRAPER I JUST

No Aaravos and Callum interaction is also smth I've made my peace about but after the trailer, especially the choice to use that thumbnail for it/as a promo image, idk, I am kind of sad I have to wait until S7 for any of that and now I wonder how significant it can really be/why hes gonna need callum as a puppet now if he's Out and as powerful as he seems to be. we just raised the stakes but had three entire seasons of building towards it, so how can s7 handle getting callum to do dark magic again, theoretical possession/aaravos use, coming back from that, ect, all within 9 eps?

tbh no one really had grief about sir sparklepuff being gone which I guess he wasn't a full Person in anyone's eyes and the focus was all on Claudia/her state which was fine, like we did get some of that nonverbally with Terry at least but we kinda moved right past it. like even one line in ep 9 from terry like "look what he had you do to his most recent child" would have made me go yeah exactly that Mattered but it wasn't there

in addition to no Callum at the wedding Ezran also just sat on Viren being back like idk I guess I wish he'd talked to Amaya more. like I loved him and Aanya I just feel there was room for Both

Listen I'm not one of the people only watching the show for Aaravos and I am delighted with the two episodes we got of him but that he was in more episodes in S3 than in S6 does have me like. cries. really. s4 and s5 i didn't mind in part because I figured stars would be big and it Was but im like oh my god. i got to ep 7 and was like is he REALLY not gonna get out which thankfully he did but only at the end

and the end was like. the biggest cliffhanger we've ever had and i get going for the suspense but it's KILLING ME MAN

I know Aaravos's motivation/goal but not exactly how his actions are leading to that whatsoever as he seems to play every side and doesn't even favor humans if he's willing to torch katolis. unbridled chaos i guess? is that it? I don't even know what to be afraid of next season with him except I'd presume he's going to Xadia next and will Somehow be getting back at the Cosmic Order but idk what the past thousand years have truly been for unless it's waiting around for the stars to align and throwing a fit while doing so

Runaan is out and he and Callum didn't get so much as a sentence between them and that and the Aaravos out but also no conversation double whammy just has me like

PLEASE

at the end of this all this was a more dramatic/cinematic season but it didn't have a lot of the smaller character reaction moments/balance the prior seasons all seemed to give me tbh and it took all season to lead up to highly anticipated events aka letting Runaan and Aaravos out but I didn't get any of the Payoff of that characterwise except for Runaan and Rayla and idk I do feel both like S6 had some of the best moments of the show and also really disappointed in places where it feels like it could have been so easy to have had just a Bit more cohesion and characters plugged into their overarching circumstances/dynamics more

like I think we had the time for it

and going into this expecting a penultimate season and then learning theres a third arc planned, it makes the pacing and lack of aaravos sort of make sense but also has me like, we may not even get that and now I feel like s7 will make or break the Entire show for me which is terrifying

like we got a lot of new info but it was largely not what I was expecting without touching on a lot of stuff I was hoping for and I AGH. i didnt expect this season to continue the build up train and I'm having a hard time accepting that it's the first time tdp has ever like. idk. thrown me such a curveball that it's gotten me honest to god upset which is on me and not the show, and i keep hoping i feel better but so much rides on s7 now

[habibialkaysani]

Fic writer meme: 2, 4, 81

2. talk about a notable time a narrative or character has looked you dead in the eyes and said “fuck your plan, here’s what we’re actually doing.”

omg so I think the coolest one was with edwina sharma in my first multichapter bridgerton fic, the viscountess who vexes me. for those who don't know, the tl;dr of s2 is a doomed love triangle between edwina and kate sharma (sisters) and anthony bridgerton who pursues edwina because he doesn't love her and is terrified of being in love. the fic I wrote was a kate/anthony engagement fic because in the show they skip over that completely and jump straight to the epilogue when they're married. I always thought given the circumstances that edwina would not have attended kate and anthony's wedding - I know that I wouldn't have if I were ever in that position. but the more I wrote of edwina, including her interactions with anthony now he was engaged to her sister, the more I started rethinking my plan. edwina was not meant to be in a lot of scenes in this fic, and she's not in loads, but she does feature somewhat at the wedding and other ceremonies (mehndi and pithi) not because I planned it but because edwina just would not leave my mind. plus I found her dynamic with anthony fascinating to write. that being said, I know that most of the fandom dislikes her immensely, so I don't write as much of her as I would like.

4. what is the plot bunny you've been carrying for the longest? optional bonus question: do you ever wonder why you haven't written it yet and experience deep existential dread?

okay okay so there's this legendary bollywood movie that is an absolute classic - kabhi khushi kabhie gham (translating as "sometimes in happiness, sometimes in sadness") and I wrote my idea for a kate/anthony au based on the plot. I was a genius about it tho because I reversed the gender roles. in the movie, rahul is the adopted son of a rich guy who falls for anjali, a working class girl, and then rahul's father doesn't accept him and refuses to give his blessing for their marriage. I dreamed up an au with kate sharma as rahul and anthony as anjali, not just because of the gender switch here but also the change in kate being from the upper class instead of anthony. my main thing with this is that I have 3 active wips currently and I don't want to add to that pile when I'm barely updating my current wips as it is. not to mention I think I'd need to watch the source material (both bridgerton and k3g) to fully immerse myself in this au and idk. the stars just haven't quite aligned yet.

plus there's another movie au I'm obsessed with but idk how to write it - and that's wicked! in my mind, kate is fiyero, anthony is elphaba and simon basset is glinda, with a very homoerotic friendship between anthony and simon (just like the show lbr) and kate/anthony endgame. my whole thing is subverting the roles characters have in the original source material because I find their roles in aus far more interesting in exploring underrated elements of characters - like anthony's more playful or sassy or bashful side in elphaba, simon's mean girl potential or kate being a female casanova. and also then I'm taking away what previously felt like integral parts of said characters like anthony being wealthy - and it still makes sense character wise. I feel like all my stuff is character driven, so having aus as a way of character exploration is fun, but I guess the reason it fills me with existential dread starting any new wip is literally because I know it will snowball, that's what happened with my last three fics lmao.

81. if you could go back in time and give your younger self a piece of writing advice specific to you, what would it be?

oh god. see I'm tempted to say just don't write as much smut as you did, but honestly I don't think I'd have been able to learn to get good at it. and I think you have to be bad at smut to then learn to be good at it, at least for writers starting out as teenagers or whatever.

maybe I would say that just because you regard something as practice writing doesn't mean you shouldn't consider fic as sharpening your craft or being a better storyteller. I feel like I only really started having conversations about specific storytelling techniques very late into my fanfic journey, and that was such a shame. and I guess advice for me specifically is that when you get an idea write it down stat, because your brain sucks and you won't remember.

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