#idk I don’t wanna call it misandry
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
I've been on bluesky and I like it as a platform, I like how it looks and works and a lot of the people on it, but the discourse on it makes me extremely unhappy. It's my fault for looking for it most of the time, but yesterday I wasn't even looking FOR discourse, I just searched "trans man" trying to find any transmasc positivity to hold onto, and the first thing I saw was a post that said "if I was transmasc I wouldn't even transition to avoid being associated with modern men" and it's like. That's such a fucking hurtful thing to say. Much like Tumblr, bluesky has a lot of really popular and good at posting trans women, and I like most of them alright, but a lot of them have a very, very woefully incomplete view of the transmasc experience. The ongoing discourse right now is about this word that was coined-- "cissexual"-which is said to be the opposite of "transsexual", which I guess only refers to transitioning trans people in this case. A lot of popular and well-liked transfem posters are calling closeted/pre-t/non-transitioning non binary people "cissexuals" and it makes my skin crawl for reasons that should be obvious to anyone who reads that word. The main people speaking out about how harmful this word is, though, IMO, are doing so in a very misogynistic and over-the-top way, so I feel unsafe to voice my own discomfort at all. Even among people I follow and like I see a lot of "no man is oppressed for being a man, misandry never factors into terfism because trans women aren't men", and I feel like I'm going insane??? Idk, but I had to go through and read your blog a lot because there's so little comfort for trans men, it seems.
I wanna block everyone who has ever participated in any of this, but I feel like if I do I'll be just seen as transmisogynistic. It's like, I'm blocking because I am using your posts as digital self harm. I don't think any of these women are bad people, but seeing this stuff hurts. I feel like I don't have a voice anywhere, and anything I could ever voice will just be mocked.
i don’t think you should feel bad at all- I think you should do it extremely unapologetically. i would feel the same for a trans woman in the opposite position, when theres a place full of trans men and some inevitably make insensitive comments. even if they are good people, even if theyre just ignorant, its hurtful and it isnt ok! not only do you deserve a space away from those comments, but if people do notice, its a message that needs to be sent, imo. and the well meaning people will hopefully listen.
35 notes
·
View notes
Text
https://www.tumblr.com/4sk-t1cc1-t0by/768425799798980608/ooc-post-3
HELLO!!! I thought it would be more organized to put the important details in here :)
Do not interact list:
-Any sort of transphobe/homophobe
-Racists
-Sexists/Misogyny/Misandry
-People who think that headcannons are cringe (cause there’s a lot of that here)
-MAPS (disgusting)
-Any form of body shaming
——————————————————————————————
Don’t do:
-NSFW (not including simping, unless if you get too freaky)
-Mention Masky/Tim cheesecake joke thing, it’s fatphobic/bodyshaming!!
-Ask other characters (I will only answer asks that are including Toby as well in some way)
(More will probably be added in the future but I can’t think of anything else)
Feel free to:
-Ask for your self-insert/creepypasta to be added in an ask
-Simp (Again, don’t get too freaky. You can be suggestive at most but that’s it)
-Waffle joke cause as far as I know it is harmless :)
-Ask other characters, AS LONG AS IT ALSO INCLUDES TOBY IN THE ASK. Characters can be:
Toby (Ticci Toby) [He/Him] [28]
EJ (Eyeless Jack) [He/Them] [29]
Clockwork [She/Her] [24]
Jane the killer [Any/All] [32]
Jeff the killer [He/It] [28]
Masky/Tim [He/Him] [37]
Hoody/Brian [He/Him] [39]
Slenderman [They/it], Trenderman [He/Them] or Splendorman [He/Her] [They are all somewhere in the hundreds age-wise idk]
Sally Williams [She/Her] [13]
X-Virus [They/Them] [25]
Splitface/Lesley [He/Him] [37]
Emoji anons (or whatever they’re called) are allowed! Just please ask first for the emoji anon you wanna be so I can make sure there ain’t any doubles.
This ask blog is a way for me to get over art block (which is why I answer everything with art) and as a way to bring back the silly fanon Toby (and to show my own interpretations of the characters). I do not owe any of these characters (I believe Toby was made by Kastoway who left the fandom) and Hoody/Brian and Masky/Tim is from the web series Marble Hornets (able to watch on YouTube!!)
I might add some of my own Creepypasta Oc(s) in the future if I think it would fit with the ask
(My main account is @fritzjings btw)
(No, I do not do commissions)
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
Unpopular opinion
But guys can benefit front the same empowerment and encouragement as girls can.
Let me explain.
Everyone on this website will say toxic masculinity or mention it or some shit. But no one ever really unpacks it other than just saying ‘the patriarchy’, ‘ men don’t deal with emotions’ or some shit like that.
But a big part of sexism is making men and women feel inherently different with different needs, roles, wants, abilities etc. in the one usually identified as the patriarchy men are unfeeling, physically fit, stone blocks, possessive, in-charge and dominant.
Feminism functions on the ideals that men, women and every gender under the sun( regardless of legal recognition or labels cause god knows the world is insane right now).
Why am I bitching and moaning then? Well it’s because I’ve been on a long, twisting and arduous journey on dealing with body image issues, self-Love and lack of if, depression and all of that shit. And one of the reasons it’s been so damn difficult is because of lack of resources.
There’s not really self love resources for guys because we’re not supposed to have these issues. There’s no body image resources for guys, there’s little to no resources for mental illness, eating disorders, sexual issues, relationship help.
Think about it, when was the last time you saw a post on here that was kind towards guys? Men of color, queer men, trans men, disabled men, any man.
And this is because that these areas, as well as online spheres like tumblr, are very female centric. And things here are very extreme, a societal reaction towards what’s considered wrong, think like the Bolshevik portion of the Russian revolution being such an extreme and visceral reaction to imperial Russia.
This is also evident in the treatment of masculinely styled or presenting women, I.e. butch lesbians, who will get targeted, even by other queer women, for ‘masculine privilege’. Which I’m sorry but unless your cisgender, masculine privilege doesn’t *really* apply.
The only way that communities like Tumblr accept any form of masculinity is by belittling, infantilizing or twisting it. All the posts for trans men are primarily geared towards ‘soft boys’ and most people act like trans men are desexualized, un-masculine beings of cute fluffy sweaters, flower-crowns and shimmery rainbow contour.( I’ll try to avoid getting into the various issues of how irl groups and online groups treat/view trans guys because that’s a separate rant for another day). If a guy doesn’t fit those criteria he’s demonized into a misogynistic rapist. There was a post I saw recently where some people were joking that a thread about what men wanted sexually would be rapey and the worst of humanity when in actuality the guys wanted things like sexual encouragement, being submissive/feeling safe as the little spoon and wanting to please their partner. But tumblr, and many irl liberal places, will treat men the same way the patriarchy treats them. Like they’re unfeeling, unbothered, sexually predatory, dominant things.
And I’m not saying all resources need to be geared towards men. I fully understand that women also deal with body image and self love issues.
But I think in the aspects of sexual positivity, body image help, self love, mental illness and just good helpful shit like that, there needs to be more variety in the gender. And presentation of those things. Having them for men and masculine presenting or androgynous people.
And to anyone who wants to bitch at me about this I’ll just point you to the various statements and studies on how suicide( and obviously the associated issues and causes with it) is one of the leading causes is men’s deaths. Because honestly lives could genuinely be saved by extending the same loving empowerment that you preach
Thanks for listening to my long rant
#sexism#men#guys#trans#positivity#help#suicide and depression#body image and self love#idk I don’t wanna call it misandry#but I’ll say bias or demonization
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
wanna preface this by saying i’m tme (transmisogyny exempt) and transmasculine so like idk if it’s my place to point this out, but i just wanted to talk about something i’ve noticed happen on this hellsite
i’ve noticed that sometimes a t/rf or someone else on here will be transmisogynistic (eg they’ll call trans women men or make some fucked up transmisogynistic remark about “biological males” or whatever other nonsense) and the person (usually tme) will say something like “well this is misandry stop hating men :((”
and honestly i don’t know what to tell you my friend but like if you see blatant transmisogyny and a trans woman being misgendered and your first thought is “this is misandry and hatred of men” that REALLY says something about what gender you see trans women as huh
#just. noticed this a lot.#tw transmisogyny mention#ive noticed transmascs doing it a lot?? and i’m like guys what the fuck??#hello??#anyways i’m TME and not transfem so I don’t know if it’s my place to point this out? but yeah i felt i should say smth#so ye if any transmisogyny affected people wanna add on or like word it better yeah!!#original post
39 notes
·
View notes
Note
Idk if ur the right person to send this to so feel free to ignore if you aren't but I'm beginning to realize that I might be a trans guy after years of thinking I'm enby and I'm really struggling with that? I've received a lot of the messages over the years about how men are bad and violent and I've also experienced a lot of gender based violence before I was out. I know intellectually that there's nothing wrong with manhood and yet I'm still really struggling. Idk do you have any thoughts on learning to accept your own manhood
Okay! Sorry this took a few days to answer but this is...definitely still a complicated thing for me, too.
First off I wanna say that whether you end up identifying as a binary trans man or somewhere in between that and nonbinary, that is very cool and valid and all of this can apply no matter where on the spectrum of masculinity you ultimately end up falling.
I saw a post which explains the basic thesis of what I'm gonna say, which is that your gender does not equal your morality.
Tumblr in particular really likes to go hard on the misandry and it can be really hard not to internalize that. Especially when it comes in the form of so many jokes, and especially especially when some of it does line up with experiences you’ve had. The biggest thing to realize, is that just *being a man* doesn't make you inherently violent or toxic or bad. All of the things that Tumblr and feminism in general tends to equate to “being a man = bad” are things that are learned or encouraged over time, no matter how much terfs like to insist they are traits inherent in being born with a y chromosome.
(And yes, these misandry arguments ALL have their basis in gender essentialism and in arguing why trans people can’t exist.)
As this relates to trans men, it becomes akin to walking a tightrope our entire lives. In both society at large and LGBT spaces we're made to fit as close as possible into gender norms to avoid violence or oppression(or the insistence we’re really just lesbians or self-hating cishets). But we also have first hand experience of the ways in which men are *socialized* to behave being harmful and don’t want to perpetuate them and be labeled a ‘bad person’. So we have to constantly walk this line of, I suppose trying to act manly enough while also trying not to cause waves (And, AS A NOTE, does that sound eerily similar to the argument most feminists say is purely a feminine experience? Is it almost like the very system that seeks to free cis women through hatred of men perpetrates those exact same systems onto other marginalized communities?)
And I will say, this is something I still struggle with. A lot. It's not going to be something you can take a magic pill for and never have to worry about again. I started transitioning almost a decade ago and I'm still trying to find the balance. Cis men can spend their *whole lives* trying to find that balance. I know quite a few - in case it feels like this is a purely trans experience. Reckoning with the way that male privilege has socialized men to harm at the same time radical feminism has socialized everyone it can that all men intentionally cause harm is a universal experience among men who are aware of it.
It's not easy, and I guess just...if you feel like you're struggling on that front as you continue your gender journey(Laynie i hate you i hate you i hate you) try to remind yourself that you're not alone. And that what you’re fighting against is a systemic socialization, not something inherent in yourself. You’re going to screw up - that doesn't make you a bad person or a bad man.
I listen a lot to Brene Brown.
I know people are probably sick of hearing me talk about her, but she is a shame researcher who honestly helped me a LOT in realizing why I was feeling so bad about parts of my personality or my gender expression. She’s excellent. If you find you’re having a lot of trouble reckoning with being this thing you have perceived as bad for a very long time, I highly recommend listening to some of her ted talks and other speeches. Most of them are on youtube.
For a long time I was trying to base my gender off of what I thought people would love. I went over the top, dressed in popular styles, was WAY more feminine than I actually feel, and tried to make myself as unassuming as possible - in part because of childhood trauma but also because I was genuinely ashamed to be a man(particularly a gay man) because I had internalized the idea that men - especially gay men - were woman-haters. (And, because I hated *myself* as a woman, I thought that I also hated women, and I thought that I must be one of those Bad Gays.)
But once I stopped trying to do that? Once I was like ‘no I’m actually a gay-up man’ and stopped berating myself for not liking my feminie body and hating the parts of myself that I didn’t identify with but felt forced to perform? Once I started looking at what made *me* happy and not other people? It became so much easier to not feel those things.
SO I guess, what I’m saying is that the best way to deal with internalized misandry is to try to forgive yourself, and recognize that the things that men perpetrated against you and that people say are ‘toxic male traits’ are not *inherent* to being a man. They are things that are taught to men(both cis and trans) by society. And also that like, these are also things that are not just inherent to men. Any toxic trait that a man exhibits a woman can too - and yeah there’s a discussion about how the general power imbalance between men and women makes it less likely a woman would cause as much damage but honestly? If you’re on tumblr you’re most likely in female dominated spaces where arguably that isn’t true, especially with the number of fucking TERFS on this website.
Also....you do not inherit cismale privilege just by identifying as a man. No matter how far you take your transition, you are *always* going to be at a different level of privilege from a cisman. Even if you transition as far as you are able to right now and live and pass as a cisman for the rest of your life, you are not a cisman and that is going to affect how you move through the world.
(That doesn’t mean you are not a *man* because you are not cis, btw. Just that there are things that cismen don’t have to worry about that are going to affect your life - things like ovarian cancer, breast cancer, hormonal dependence, corrective abuse, medical shortages, physical differences that out transpeople - there are a hundred things that trans men have to experience throughout their lives that cismen are never, ever going to deal with. And yes, this goes for transwomen / cis women as well.)
Something that helped me become comfortable living as a man was to look at specific traits of the men in my life. Why did I feel comfortable around this man, but not others, what red flags physically or emotionally did this behavior set off in me? And then focusing on those specific *behaviors* rather than the men themselves. If you can separate the individual traits from an overarching idea of 'manhood' that might be helpful in feeling like you can inhabit manhood without being toxic.
Basically, my best advice is to tell yourself that what makes you a man does not make you inherently toxic. In fact what makes *all* men, men, does not make them inherently toxic. Men are not trash just because they’re men, and the fight against misandry *is* a fight for marginalized people. It hurts transmasculine people in exactly the ways you are hurting. No matter what TERFs say - no matter what male-critical or whatever they’re calling themselves to not have to call themselves TERFs say - men are not born evil, or bad, or trash.
Toxic masculinity is a learned behavior. It is not something you are given the day you start identifying as a man, and it is not something you have to perpetuate.
Calling it anything else does a disservice to everyone who identifies as masculine of center but especially trans men, who have to reckon with this exact knowledge that in affirming who they are, certain people are going to hate them and call them monsters and tell them they are trash and unworthy of loving without hurting.
And that shit just isn’t true. It isn’t fucking true! Men are not toxic just because they are men, and you are not a bad person just because you are a transman. That’s, I suppose, the best advice I can offer you. I hope it helps, and I also just want to reiterate that I hope you find affirmation in whatever you end up deciding. <3 <3 <3
#milo answers#gender#queer tag#transmasc#anon i hope you see this i know its a few days since you sent it#anon#Anonymous#long post
9 notes
·
View notes
Note
Gush about your fave DR character! ♡
WVJHKHKHKHK anon whoever you are please know that youre unleashing a beast but also thank you im…..
(actually i made a tierlist for this though it might not be as accurate since it was a few months ago)
(also sorry for the characters that are in the lower tiers i swear even if i don’t like them most of them are still good memes. and the ones in “c” and “b” i’d definitely like more if there’s some good art/fics that explore their characters better though i might not actively look for it.)
OK so just to preface i havent seen most free times and most of my impression came from joseph anderson’s playthrough sooo i might be biased but im definitely planning on rewatching at least v3 in its entirety with all of its ftesO i guess it’s best if i start chronological and lemme just say. SAKURA OOGAMI IS BEST GIRL
it’s easy to say that im weak for big stronk gal who can lift me easily. and there is /definitely/ that point.
this is gonna sound weird but i really like the level-headedness she brings to the trials. i wouldnt say she’s the smartest but she rounds up the whole cast in a way that keeps the trials from being too absurd and non-sensical. there are other characters that also do this but seeing it come from her makes me happy somehow? maybe it’s because she also balances asahina in that sense and also that she’s the fourth trial stronk person who’s the most level headed compared to gonta and nekomaru. not saying those two are bad either, they’re great characters in their own right but i feel like their function is more on the side of entertaining rather than weighing in on the discussion. i especially think nekomaru’s whole thing with shitting is funny and it’s kinda a shame that sdr2 cut him from trials starting from the third.
speaking of sakura, yes i ship her with hina. no, duh. they’re good together. but i was also kinda touched when she talked about kenshiro. idk, sakura has two strong beefy hands and she can hold her girlfriend and boyfriend at the same time ok.(pretty sure kenshiro appears in udg but i havent experienced that game outside of seeing a few cutscenes so i wouldnt know)
also the fact that we get a callback to her in the strawberry house was. idk if i should say cool or if it was funny but it was something. and yep, her death was the saddest out of the fourth trials the games had. nekomaru’s death was more respectful for me and i felt more sad about gonta during his trial than his death. it’s more gruesome than sad, to be honest.(and ok the smoothskin joe gives to sakura is also kinda funny)
with other dr1 characters i like most of them are usually because of my friends’ (who got into dr years before i did) influence like kyoko and celeste. there are some others i laugh at but it’s more because of the inside jokes of the streamer i was watching.
.
ok so with sdr2 komaeda is easily one of the top. but tbh the reason why it is is bc a few years ago i read this (illegally distributed) doujin that had written his character really well. tbh i feel kinda bad now knowing that the doujinka stopped circulating their doujin bc of that and some of the subject matter of their doujin is… a bit too much for me. but the ones that are good are really good and when i came into canon i was like, “oh, this is the fingers in ass guy who got memed to death" nowadays, i see him more as pickle nagito though. i am interested in seeing how his character can be… well, not redeemed but i want to see him heal. whiiich might never happen in canon bc his hope bagel personality is too infamous now.
also i know everyone hcs nagito’s voice as smth along the lines of nico’s voice or john’s voice but like consider jph’s stoner voice. please. it’s so fucking funny with the fucking pickle komaeda meme. maybe it’s bc although im not obsessed with hope or despair, i related to his way of seeing karma.
after experiencing sdr2 thoough, lemme just say that johnny yong bosch did a great job voicing hajimmy hinata. like im not even kidding i really like that voice and if i was ursula i would steal that voice for my own use. buutt i cant do that. unlike komaeda, i’m pretty indifferent to his character arc and enjoy his one on one interactions with the characters more and how he reacts to the immediate events that happened over the course of sdr2.
soo yeah komaeda and hinata are literally opposites in my head, ain’t much of a surprise that i ship them i guess. but!! i like a lot of the gals in sdr2 surprisingly.
like, ok. maybe i’m biased but the designs for the gals in sdr2 are so goddamn adorable. like okay there’s the obvious ones like chiaki and sonia. and i don’t know why sonia’s personality is so goddamn adorable. like not in the “awww you’re so fucking uwu” type of way but more in the sense that she’s funny? it feels like even through all her weirdness that she still manages to make genuine connections with the characters.
with peko, it’s hard to dislike her considering her whole arc with the second trial. of course liking her goes in hand with liking fuyuhiko’s character too but i just like.. how stoic she sounds??? it’s adorable????? and with mikan yeah she kinda went… off in the third trial but consider???? her voice when she snaps was so goddamn hot?????????????? sdr2 has the best voice acting cant change my mind.
and i don’t know why, gundham is so goddamn funny and if i wanna show how absurd sdr2 can get i show my friends gundham’s scenes. he’s fucking funny, ok. and alongside nekomaru i can respect his death in a way. i goddamn saluted when i first watched his execution (with the full context of the trial) because i just really liked the conviction he carried with his murder.
.
aand with v3…
miu’s one of the funniest character ever!! i swear. i know some people look at the sex jokes and go, “ugh” but im a manchild so i ended up enjoying her moments so much. though i’m kinda a bit meh on the fanservice side, i like how she’s one of the characters who sticks out more. in my language we call her “pentolan” i guess.
tenko’s kinda an easy character for me to like considering… stronk lady. would love for her to carry me. the misandry can get a bit too much but she’s also a pretty funny and genuine character on top of that so she came out with me liking her.
kaede and tsumugi are characters i grew to /love/ after i thought about them a lot.
with kaede, the point i started to relate to her… was with her thirst with girls. i swear im not joking. but. okay. i like her position as the protag and all her ideals. one thing i was surprised that didn’t manage to make me relate to her was her passion for piano considering i’ve also studied it for like, around 12 years. maybe it’s because i kinda fell out of it around 2 years ago because reasons. despite of that though, i like how assertive she was in her time as the protag. and her execution was goddamn beautiful.
tsumugi, though, i wouldn’t grow to love as much if it weren’t for 郁十‘s works. like. please. go watch all of their videos it’s all so good. i think someone else talked about this, but tsumugi’s position as the mastermind feels a lot more “human” than what we got with junko enoshima. compared to kaede, i feel like we could’ve gotten so much more with her as a villain and i just want to see more of her outside of her “plain bread” facade.
it might also be due to my own hcs for them so they’re on my head a lot more than most of the other v3 characters are. even more than my two actual favorites!!
ok, ok. kochiki and shuichi are definitely my favorites of the bunch. like, the toppest tiers of fav actually. it’s kinda hard to talk about these two separately tbh. maybe it’s because before danganronpa, my previous otp in my previous fandom had these two’s dynamics as well. and like, there’s a certain pairing to a fandom i haven’t caught up to in years who also have a detective/phantom thief dynamic. aaand also persona 5 and that one pairing that i don’t have to name for people to know which is my otp.
yeah i’m a sucker for these types of characters. it’s kinda typical that they’d be popular in the fandom. which i’ll h a p p i l y eat up.
soo it’s kinda easy to start with kochiki. i think i don’t have to go into every minute detail and go all meta on why i like him as a character because a lot of people have articulated better on why his character works. he’s fun to watch when interacting with other characters and figuring out his motivation put my brain on work. i’ll say this though, i actually enjoy kokichi better when he’s not being woobified. he’s a rat through and through and i will enjoy this possum boi for that.
(oh wait, possum boi is rantaro. nvm.)
and now mr. detective himself. so i loved his character at first. didn’t love him more than kochiki but. liked his arc, he was a fun protag. then the fan content came and he became very moe in my eyes so i guess it’s easier to say that i uh, like fancontent of shuichi better but i like canon kokichi better. and also how is it that the majority of ousai e-rated works has shuichi as a top SHUICHI IS NOT A TOP um yeah anyway. i feel like out of all the main characters he’d be a pretty nice person to hang out with.
also his eyelashes are nice. im totally not embarrassed while typing this out. im literally physically restraining myself from typing out more so i can not embarrass myself even further.
.
okay congrats anon here you are i hope you enjoyed this embarrassing mess it took me more than a day to type this out because i don’t know where i should stop myself regarding some characters. but uh yeah. i have gushed. now i shall return to the abyss.
(unless anybody asks me to gush about my ocs which might actually be thrice as long as this)
#LFKDJAG;LFKDJGA;LKJ THE READMORE DIDNT WORK IM SO SORRY#poffin.txt#ok i fixed it i think#for the low low amount of 0.1 dollars i will stop gushing abt anything i am an embarrassment#im sorry it took me almost 2k words to gush but like... my love for some characters are just...... *shuichi clenching his chest sprite*
4 notes
·
View notes
Note
Please learn to recognize venting. I have a great dad and a great boyfriend. I don’t hate men. I also don’t care when women need to vent about extreme misogyny they’ve experienced in their lives. The way men treat women has extreme pervasive problems even if I’ve been lucky enough to know men who rise above that. There’s no need to rub in people’s faces that your dad was so great when they say they were abused. Be grateful. Don’t be an asshole
2) It’s also kinda telling that you can’t see someone make a misandry joke without acting triggered but accuse op of being sensitive and offended. Don’t you see how circular this all is.
??? i didnt accuse OP of being sensitive and offended tho???
idk when you say you hate a whole group of people, dont you feel a LITTLE disgusting?? fyi my dad died when i was one years old, i was referring to my grandfather, of which i have been grateful for my time for because guess what, he also passed away three years ago.
you see, the reason why i find it so gross is because i LOVE men, men have made such a profound impact in my life. directly and indirectly. some men can be disgusting but some women can be disgusting. youre the same as an incel being mad about women not wanting to fuck them.
if you wanna say you hate a whole group of people, im not gonna stop you, but i think its childish and emotionally immature to some degree. part of owning up to your feelings is recognizing someone did something wrong to you and moving on from that rather than hating people. hate does nothing but eat you up inside, trust me, i know.
i wasnt rubbing it in btw, more like saying i just dont relate //shrug anyhow, thanks for at least being partly civil (you got deducted on civil points when you assumed shit and called me an asshole LOL)
4 notes
·
View notes