#idk! im thinking about durge
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sitting here poking at durge w a stick to make a choice on who they like
#the thing is I’m rotating several of the characters but I’m a way of like. I like the idea of your friendship#more than I like the idea of a romance#or maybe not friendship but like. v v close and not in a romantic way#I am Pondering and Proding#astarion is kinda. kinda sitting there#there’s some neurotic swag that is enchanting to durge#but gale has that way of they connect on a magical and academic way#and part of stuff is durge trying to make sense of the world through their magic#what fragments can be gleaned from that? do they even want to know?#idk! im thinking about durge#also when i refer to durge its like. my own oc#that is their name for the time being#oc: durge
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Ishtara | Mephistopheles tiefling | vengeance paladin | dark urge
#baldur’s gate 3#bg3#oc: ishtara#baldur's gate oc#bg3 tiefling#bg3 oc#bg3 tav#her name means goddess of love in infernal jhdfbgjhdfbg yeah im normal about her idk wym#mommy? sorry. mommy? sorry. mommy?#I couldn't help but post her...I think I'm in love guys#bg3 durge#baldur's gate 3#bg3 dark urge#bg3 paladin
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my brain is having so much fun with bhaalspawn!Octavian because oh my god durge!darkstar + Astarion talking about how much terror he felt when he thought Bhaal claimed Octavian completely + him going “when i vowed we’d save you, we will save you”
#i am going to eat drywall#I have been LIVING for durge!darkstar . they make me SICK#plus i think bhaalspawn!Octavian fits him better overall like idk just saying…#.two deeply broken people meeting with a common problem to remedy + learning to care for each other#+ wanting to do whatever possible to help the other no matter what happens#uughhhhhhh bashes my head against the wall#im using Avi’s full first name because he would not have a nickname as a bhaalspawn because that is not formal of him#once I complete another more updated durge run then I’ll probably rewrite darkstar to be about spawn!astarion and bhaalspawn!avi#“But durge would let Astarion ascend” NO because avi knows that would turn Astarion into the man he hated and he is NOT GONNA LET IT HAPPEN#okay yeah :) i should be doing English analysis right now :)#anyways darkstar plans have been made if you read till here ilysm#📸┆luvie rambles#🩸 ✮⋆˙『 darkstar’s kisses 』
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I've been chewing on what fears the bg3 characters would be because I do that with almost every piece of media I like now.
Gale is the Beholding (hubris, pursuit of knowledge above all else, his ex can literally see everything he does in/with the Weave). You could make an argument for Desolation b/c of the orb but I think that's secondary. Wyll is the Hunt imo, but the Desolation works for him too- I think his situation is similar to that Hunter we meet whose name I'm forgetting, whose inciting incident has to do with the Dark. I thought the same thing about Karlach but I think she's Desolation instead of Hunt, both aesthetically and because she was actively betrayed and is, you know, dying. Shadowheart is the Dark. Halsin could honestly be the Lonely: he's pretty isolated from the people around him emotionally. An island unto himself etc etc. Lae'zel is the End imo. You'd think she'd be Hunt but End fits into Vlaakith's whole deal (victim of the End, avatar of the Hunt?). Astarion could be either the Buried (since that covers abuse as well, he was literally kept underground/out of the sunlight, etc etc) or the Hunt. I'm a bit undecided there. I don't know enough about Minthara to make a call on her and I don't want to just say Web because of Lolth. Slaughter, maybe? Since that fear covers war. Jaheira and Minsc are Hunt too, I think (there's a lot of Hunt but that comes with the territory when you're adventuring).
Gortash is Web and you cannot convince me otherwise. I think Orin is Slaughter but, honestly, Durge seems more associated with the Extinction to me because of Bhaal's end goal. The Desolation and the Lonely tag-teamed Ketheric's ass but he's an avatar of the End. Dame Aylin is an avatar of the Hunt, victim of the Dark, and Isobel is an avatar of the End a la the main End avatar we see (Oliver? I really need to re-listen...)
There's obviously a lot of overlap and bleed because there always is. I've been wanting to make art based off of this but it's not happening anytime soon so I figured I'd shout about it into the void a bit lol
#as far as tavs go:#dora is probably hunt? unclear#peri's stranger#corentin specifically is slaughter even though i know i said durge was extinction#candor is web tbh but a victim of the vast#io is...none? honestly? they were just a Normal Person before pre-tadpole#luka's end obviously#undecided about solace. theyre a victim of/marked by slaughter & desolation even though theyre a tempest cleric#buried? perhaps? im chewing on beholding for them too b/c of reasons i cant quite articulate rn#anyway#my post#jay rambles#bg3#bg3 companions#bg3 characters#the magnus archives#tma#i dont think orins stranger despite being a changeling because that just enhances her killing#like. nicola's pretty damn murderous too but that's just bc she is#while orin uses her shapeshifting as a tool to kill *better*#idk if that makes sense#dribbles is stranger though (the real one AND the doppleganger. dont trust clowns kids)
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I got back home recently and indulgently used my Durge and Wyll for warm ups
#bg3#bg3 durge#wyll ravengard#bg3 wyll#1) again it was like midnight when I drew these and forgot to look up his horn shape please ignore that#2) I watched several playthroughs on slay the princess and it AWOKE something in me it ENLIGHTENED me#something something monstrous hero and the princess who’s a monster something#it just unlocked something in my brain I saw the light I now can’t stop thinking about wyll and durge sorry#im sharing these now bc idk if I’ll ever actually clean these up lol#my artwork
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to elaborate slightly on this idea, regarding gortash recycling durge's brain to use in a steel watcher for his personal use;
if I recall correctly, the steel watcher brains are kind of in a half-unconscious state? Like, barely aware of what they're doing, drifting in and out, to be easily controllable. but he always did like durge having their own free will, didn't he?
can you imagine how bad it would hurt to be fully awake and aware, in a body that isn't flesh, that simply doesn't fit the brain that's controlling it? I think durge would be in absolute agony, and i think that Gortash wouldn't know how to handle that fact beyond deliberately ignoring it. What else is he going to do? Put them out of their misery, after he worked so hard to preserve them?
no. no, he'll just wait it out. They're strong, after all, they're resilient and clever, they can figure out how to cope with the pain if it's so awful.
I just enjoy the image of a Gortash who doesn't know how to let go, who refuses to even consider it. No matter how much that ends up hurting durge.
#durgetash#i have other ideas but theyre very specific to My Durge so im not gonna get too into it#i keep thinking of the magnus archives episode about the guy who tries to obtain immortality by putting his brain in his computer#'the angles cut me when i try to think'#idk i just loved the horror of the steel watch foundry.#i may be misremembering slightly though since its been a while.#my thoughts
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i talked abt this on bsky alr but it really pisses me off how some people try to control how other people engage with both fiction and the canon events of bg3
#“ast wouldnt want to be a dad” “gale doesn't want to be a dad” i treat canon as a suggestion#jokes aside i do understand the frustration but qlso like Let People Have Fun#ive changed So Many Things in the canon of every universe i have an oc with so idk#imo its healthier to engage with canon like treating it as a suggestion than to try to follow it strictly#but hey. nothing wrong with trying to follow it either if thats how you wanna have fun#just. dont. be a dick. when people don't engage with canon the same way you do. thats it#let people have fun. its never that deep#greatest example of my Changing rhe canon shit is that EVEY DURGE AND TAV ive ever made are adventuring together even if this wouldn't make#any sense in canon#i wanna have fun!! and the way i like to have fun is playing dolls#if your way of having fun is having an alt verse for every tav/durge or even making the same character for both tav AND durge then yay!#i find it very cool too i just like doing it differently and thats okay :)#will not discuss this with anyone btw if you wanna argue theres a very beautiful wall near me#bg3 is one of the only fandoms im in ive ever seen this and i do think its because you can canonically insert#your own chara into the narrative. im used w making shit from scratch like i have paralive ocs i have one piece ocs i have fairy#tail ocs ffxiv enstars a3 hxh and Many More. many. 200+ more.#idk im ramblin#but it does annoy me a lot when people treat fictional characters like real people that should be always respected and you can never#change how their think idk idk you get the gist#bweeeh#edit but to be VERY CLEAR i am Not talking about 1. people who ignore wyll in favor of the white twink#2. people who make actually harmful changes like that one mod that makes wyll white#im talking abt harmless shit. want to make every man pregnant? go for it! i also want to do that
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does anyone care abt me posting wips??
anywhere heres another i took the quartet stuff and edited it to being the same proposition but in a different setting yippee
There was a small knock at the door; two light taps against the thick wood that only just carried through.
Gortash lightly gestured his left hand without looking and a modified, smaller Steel Watcher whirred into action. It stomped over to the door and pulled it open, making way for a well dressed servant to step in.
With perfect posture, they confidently approached their leader, barely even glancing at the Bhaalspawn. “A letter from Lady Hhune, Your Grace. Claimed to be urgent.” The servant bowed their head, holding the delicate golden tray out toward the Archduke.
Gortash lifted the letter from the tray without looking at the servant. He idly strolled around his desk and to the empty space of the office as the servant left and quietly clicked the door shut behind them. He easily broke the wax seal of the thick parchment, his nose scrunching slightly as the strong perfumed scent of violet and iris wafted from the page. Dark eyes darted across the letter, reading quickly.
Dearest Archduke Enver Gortash,
I would like to cordially invite you to the Songbird Theatre on the fourteenth of Uktar to attend a performance from the Waterdeep String Quartet.
In accordance with it being my birthday week, the highly talented musicians will be travelling down specifically to perform for the event, and it would be the highest honour to have you in attendance.
The royal box will be provided for your exclusive use, alongside seating for a plus one if you may choose to invite another.
A three course meal will be provided at the Hhune Estate afterwards.
I look forward to seeing you there.
Yours Faithfully,
Lady Silvia Hhune
After a moment, he let out an amused huff of air from his nose. “They worked up the courage to send a personal invite.” Gortash held the letter out to Kaidos as he lazily opened only one eye to take the paper between his first and middle finger before rotating it to the proper orientation. Flaming eyes blinked open properly, barely glossing over the words as he also read fast.
“Are you taking a plus one?”
“I might if I find the right person.” Gortash sat down next to Kaidos, their shoulders bumping together with how close he got.
“No.” He handed the letter back to the Banite, who simply tossed it down onto the coffee table before resting a hand on the Bhaalian’s knee.
“Look at me, darling.”
Kaidos let his head fall to the side, still in his slouched position.
“It truly would mean a lot to me if you joined me. You would enjoy yourself, I assure you.”
A smirk tugged at the side of Kaidos’ mouth as he closed his eyes once more. “You’re such a good liar.”
Gortash tightened the grip he had on the tiefling’s knee to shake it a little bit, wordlessly insisting that he continue to have his attention. “You read the part about it being Lady Hhune’s birthday, yes? I will allow you to pick a member of her family off that very evening if you join me.”
The proposition made the Bhaalspawn open his eyes as the Banite continued.
“Think about it – how awfully tragic it would be – to have such a shocking end to what would have otherwise been a lovely day for her. All down to your cold blooded actions.”
Kaidos remained silent for a few moments, clearly thinking it over.
“Her nephew propped up in his dining chair. Head on the plate before him. The first and only guest sat for her birthday dinner.” The Bhaalspawn could not stop the small chuckle which escaped as he finished his sentence.
“Oh, you are cruel.” Gortash shared a sadistic grin with Kaidos, now fully awake and sitting up straight. “So you will join me?”
“Why not? Perhaps I will enjoy myself.”
#idk why i like this concept so much that im reusing it#i think its just funny to me to make gortash have to convince kai to do anything#make them as 'they have been married for a decade and so over everything and know eachother too well to make any trick work' as possible#this may or may not be kind of like a second bump in the road but a different carriage journey bc i really love making them bicker#i also have a wip of kai rubbing gortashs shoulders and the two arguing about that does anyone want that wip#dark urge#durge#enver gortash#durgetash#oc: kaidos escaris
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no explicit romance scene for wyll in the game? fine, i'll do it myself (WIP)
Ajax’s hands wander around Wyll, tugging along the hem of his ill-fitting shirt, fingers slipping beneath the fabric, mapping out the hard planes of his abdomen. A low rumble vibrates within Wyll’s throat, encouraging Ajax to wander further. He finds his way back down to the exposed sliver of skin, one he’d only dreamed of touching. His thumb strokes circles around the tight curls trailing down beneath his breeches, but doesn’t roam beyond the garment.
Wyll pulls away from the kiss, breathless. He leans down onto the crook of Ajax’s neck, catching his breath. Ajax’s other hand squeezes Wyll’s thigh, pulling him closer, and he responds in kind, pushing himself against Ajax. They stay still like this, the sounds of their soft breathing filling the silence in their tent.
Then, Wyll plants a kiss on Ajax’s jugular as he guides Ajax’s hand beneath the fabric of his breeches. Ajax complies, eager, and yet he asks, his voice barely a whisper, “Are you sure?” and Wyll only nods, a soft whine escaping his lips, still pulling Ajax’s wrist down to where he wants him.
#.txt#asdaljshdskdfjhsdkfj#this is literally three paragraphs of nothing.#i jump around with writing my WIPs so this is actually set before the end of act 2. after the durge scene. yeah you know the one#also i know i know i should finish my act 1 drafts first but ummmm consider this: gay sex#anyways these paragraphs are nothing it's just a bunch of groping LMAO#idk where i want this to go im still thinking about the details of how i want them to be t4t tbh -____- wgatever!!!!!#nsft /#bladesmitten#wip
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UP TOP: Is the Tadpole Consumers! Sometimes being 'Power Hungry' means eating an actual worm.
Kendis Wolfcrossing (left): Bearbarian (Druid and Barbarian), She/They (nb). Romance Rolan [Maybe Minthara. Maybe Halsin. I'm just fucking around in the PT]
Kaeliana (right): aka The Dark Urge, Soradin of Kelemvor (Sorcerer and Paladin), She/her (trans). Romance Wyll.
BOTTOM DOWN: The Parental Trauma Cleric Sibs (and potentially both technically undead).
Amryl Shadowhoard (left): Ranger/War Cleric of Bahamut, They/It/She (in order; nb). Romance Wyll/Lae'zel/REDACTED [yeah that's the polyam!]. Is, technically, Isyl's younger sibling.
Isyl Shadowhoard (right): aka The Dark Urge. Cleric of Light [hhaha] of Lathander, ???? (trans and nb). Potential Romance Barcus. Is, definitely, Amryl's older sibling. Isyl remembers that fact and Isyl remembers Lathander. Everything else is secondary. Right?
#meet my tavs#grapes chars#bg3: kendis wolfcrossing#oc: kaeliana#oc: amryl shadowhoard#oc: isyl shadowhoard#bg3 tav#bg3 durge#grapecase posts#meet my ocs#the thing im most excited for isyl is tthe sibling stuff and the struggle between past and 'nature' and ofc exploring duergar shit but i#hope isyl can be a particular shit to wulbern#im more excited about the barcus 'romance' than i expected?#i need to learnmroe about him#kendis is supposed to have a scar over their black/white eye. idk if its hard to see bc of teh tadpole eating or if a mod took it off#i'll check later#this is my current [mostly] active PTs.#but i have like six others in the shadows? lol and one nebulous plan. bc i dont have a geriatric. i wanted to make an old man githyanki but#then the enbies ate my brain#also tho some people put nb as under the trans umbrella i know some people see it as a separate umbrella.#i feel isyl sees themselves as both. they transitioned but they also see themselves as nonbinary. kendis sees being nonbinary as both in#a weird way like its own seperate thing but also under the umbrella? idk a venn diagram? i just vibe for kendis#kae proudly has a girldick. and proudly is a woman. i have mixed ideaas on when she transitioned. im sure it would have been a mess. but it#HERS.#[on the one hand i dont think bhaal cares. but on the other hand idky i feel bhaalists would get very evangelical about it. like THIS IS TH#BODY BHAAL MADE. A RE YOU SAYING BHAAL ERRED???]#amryl is they/it nonbinary. trans. wte. but they're also i think one of those nonbinary unless it's 'god forbid women are allowed to do ANY#HING'#lmao#okay okay im going back to my burrow
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I am going tovplay Baldurs Gate today. I want to play it I am going to play it.
...I cannot guarantee I will be continuing my Act 2 Durge,
#i might#im super torn!!#i want to finish it as Sunny but its hard for me to make authentic Sunny in its system#bc dnd sunny is gunslinger/inquisitive rogue forever now i hit the perfect combo#which sadly neither of which are in bg3 and im on ps5 so i doubt its moddable even if those exist#durge sunny is assasin rogue i think but im having second thoughts on making them durge#i also reeeally want to make my chaotic tiefling bardbarian Dani#bc i kind of want to do Astarion's romance and i think theyd be all about him#its! so frustrating!#its so hard for me to maintain focus on a long game MAINLY BECAUSE the gaming chair is broke. and hurty my butt#i could sink hours into this bitch if i had a good beanbag#might look onto getting one next week tbh#got a beanbag sack ages ago not realising the beans were not included rip#i also really. really want to stream it for a specific friend and let them make all the choices but idk when theyre free#or how fun that would be for them
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oh grub stays a camp follower if yenna dies cool
#re: yenna. it's kinda silly that you can tell orin (as laezel) that you're fine if she kills her but then all dialogue after is sad about it#like looking at her body and using speak with dead#yenna's sweet and all but durge was trying to get rid of her the whole time and she came back every day. he's glad she's dead#well. and yknow. obviously he's glad she's dead. that's just him.#side not about yenna. probably the most stressful part of this whole game for me personally#i cant deal with bad things happening to cats it genuinely makes me sick. even writing about it like this makes me stressed#so the thought of ever getting the scene where yenna is kidnapped. um.#i want to do a proper murder hobo run one day but then that has to happen and idk how im gonna handle it#in the meantime i wish grub would play with scratch and the owlbear cub. poor thing#at least he doesnt just wander off into the city when yenna dies. id rather he sit here not interacting with anyone than vanish#oh sorry unrelated but i just saw that fucking naked statue of durge i commissioned at the circus#didnt realise it was just gonna sit prominently in every camp. just got to the elfsong room and yep there it is again#bleh sorry just trying to recover from thinking about what happens if yenna gets kidnapped. like im not exaggerating i cant handle it#personal#ash plays bg3
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ok i might need to force myself to not romance astarion bc i don't want to know what it says about me to turn down karlach, the woman of my dreams, the character made to cater me personally, like, if she was real i'd bring the moon and stars down for the chance to see her smile, she's everything i've hoped for in a rpg companion, what does it say about me if i turn that down for someone like astarion
#ngl karlach would be too good for me and i wouldnt deserve it#shed probably ask me stuff like 'what do you want?' upon which i would be paralyzed with fear my mind completely blank unable#to process why i can't answer a simple question#and she's so up front with her emotions which i absolutely adore but i could not reciprocate that#wait am i actually for real avoiding the karlach romance bc i feel like this fictional character from a video game is too good for me#a real human being. like. i think i would feel guilty about romancing her#which makes no sense bc i romance characters too good for anyone all of the time. but idk#in those cases ive always had like a strong character i play as who is very divorced from who i am#but playing as durge there is no past so idk who my tav is yet so all i can do is project so he feels very. personal#im v sleepy and also ive had brain fog all day so yea idk#i mean i do genuinely like astarion and his character but in his case i dont feel guilty bc i feel like i#i have no idea how to finish that sentence without it sounding like 'i can fix him'#bc i dont want to fix him i want to show him compassion and respect him and his boundaries so he'll be able to reclaim tje feeling of#being in control of his life#so he'll stop putting people down to feel like hes on a pedestal#like i get him and why he is like that but i just feel like being kind and caring towards him would feel so good#it wouldnt fix him and thats a good thing bc i dont want him to change who he is but i do think he needs support#also hes hot im so mad at myself for being so atteacted to him#we wouldnt b here if i didnt have a thing for voices#besides thag back to the main point of astarion its like. ugh! im so frustrated rn bc i dont have the words#to express my emotions toward him bc everything ive said lacks the nuance that im feelikg but idk how to put it in words#i guess i want to protect him? that such a terrible sentence and still not what om going for
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Looking back at some of my bg3 screenshots while I was cleaning out my folder and man. The game is pretty and all but I 100% prefer Veilguard more. Especially when it comes my/the protag. From a visual aspect alone I think any Rook I've made looks better than any bg3 character I've made. The magic of sliders and being able to make a character fat. Like don't get me wrong I love the way Lucian looks but. God. My Rook <3
#i also think that i like veilguard more than bg3 as a whole. i REAAALLY liked the durge storyline but other than that#it was fun but i didn't have any of the same reactions especially with the main character#i loved the bg3 companions but i felt more connected to veilguards#my feelings are all over the place idk#in general if we're just talking about the bg3 cc it's so bad. i modded it to hell to enjoy a character i made#the only thing i'd like modded in for my rook is like. the ability to give him gray streaks/separate wrinkle slider/facial hair#other than that the vg cc is like. basically perfect#did i mention i can actually make characters who aren't fucking skinny/with abs <3#oh also no matter where im at in vg my game loads in assets and doesn't run shit in act 3 <3#personal
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PLEASE look at my dragon-born i love them a lot <3
#theyre gonna be my durge playthrough and their guardian is gonna look like my first tav <333#now i just have to figure out what class to put them in#im thinking of sticking with sorcerer bc it would be funny if i romance gale lmao#but idk im still thinking about it 🤔🤔
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#bg3#bg3 durge#bg3 spoilers#the dark urge#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#i kinda wanna let her go wild in Act 1 but idk if im willing to kill him about it#i think gale's a swell little guy and maybe they could be friends later but also i dont keep him in my party that much anyway so#im not really sure#also does he have any extra platonic content w durge?
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