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yourmoonmomma · 5 months ago

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hey can I ask your advice on this common issue? what do you think is the best option cause girl I have struggled with friends since forever. Every other person is either so self absorbed that they need jesus or idfk are people getting worse at communication and listening?

do you think its better to a) have limited amount of "friends" even fi you dont meet them regularly enough

b) those friends that only ever message once in a blue moon orrrr if they do ever meet up with you everything is abt them

c) or non at all bc everyone puts up a facade and you dont know which one is the real them

I feel like I have run into all sorts of people yet nothings stuck besides similar patterns in the type of people I seem to be running into. Even family and parents are sometimes a bit of a letdown as well or I barely get to see other relatives anymore. idk but the way society is currently doesnt give me good feelings and it seems that if we dont have or get into something early on we dont get to maintain close connections whereas others might just have been at the right time or place to meet their life long buddies. I tried clubs, online activities with another friend but it just didnt stick to me like that one thing would be all we had in common or they kinda didnt care to explore other activities that we couldve done well at together.

I just think and am concerned with how selfish people are becoming and how people dont even want to be accountable for nothing they ever did wrong either? Like you ask person can you not interrupt me but they will keep doing it over and over cause it seem nothing I say sticks to anyones mind. Then I get told off if im ever too loud or too quiet so I cant win with anyone. Even tho other adults are also loud and even more obnoxious than whatever im trying to do I jusr cant seem to receive the same attention long enough to feel valued

I mean say you had same age friend in college who kept turning down ur offers to socialise outside of their area / home? its rude asf imho, I even tell her that sure we can gift each other bday presents orrr we might hang out during class and such but anything else she didnt care to spend other time in my area or seeing something new or doing something new... every time I ask someone been rejecting me or almost ignore my existence even if they claim to be my "friend" I dont even tell no one nothing abt myself bc u dont know how the other person going to react and some people are chronic talkers or overshare too much and I think those types of people are more annoying to deal with bc u got to basicslly be their audience and they too also dont care that much to ask u nothing to show u no interest in ur intersts. it dont seem to matter what age or generation they be either. but damn people are getting harder to connect with bc u dont know what personality they going to have when trying to engage with them.

some people also outright contradict themselves or gaslight others in the same paragraphs or sentences too which make it harder to point out they doing it cause nobody ever wanna admit they at fault for something or other. so I cant win with that bc people seem to be so mentally asleep about themselves. I have experienced literal adult men throwing tantrums for over decade and got not a single response whenever I be trying to share my interest with them they just dont care or relatives idfk. I mean I can vent to someone and they show almost no emotion nor concern for my vent or problem. mostly bc they wont believe me or dismiss anything i ever say if they dont believe it as well.

same for those who dont ask how you doing? is the world just becoming so blindsided and cliquey, if we dont have the same level of interest that others have in themselves then they aint going to care but its been such a common pattern in my life and ik something was off when I was doing this fun run and was supposed to run with my "friends" but they ended up running slower basically to avoid me even tho i dont say nothing wrong to them then or at any point. idk why social rejection is worse feeling than completely being ignored cause at least I now want only peace in my life instead of buncha fake ass people who dont care in the long run but then life is less fun at the same time.

when ur a kid u think u can get so much praise and attention but when u an adult u quickly realise who really dont care in the long run or they can sometimes say they care but when u really upset with them they dont care to correct their behaviour. I think I been dealing with narcs my whole life bruh. sorfy for rambling thanks for reading

I think the first option is better. HOWEVER I am also a bad friend. Like I'll state it right off the bat to people. A mutual friend, Joy, recently messaged me saying she'd love to be closer with me, and I told her that I'd also love that, BUT I am not a good friend. I forget to text back, I almost NEVER text first, I'm flaky with plans, etc etc. If you need someone, I am there, but just as a general everyday friend? I'm not that great! So BECAUSE of that, your first option sounds better for me. But it may not be what feels best for you! However, I don't think isolating from numerous negative experiences is a good idea. I know it's hard to keep trying, but it will eventually be worth it.

You have to find the people who are more like-minded to you, and they ARE out there. Frankly I think you & my friend Jonah would get along REALLY well, you two seem to have similar personalities, or at least talk about very very similar things/experiences! You will find your people <3

Social rejection hurts more because you opened yourself. You're saying "maybe this will work this time." Your inner child is eagerly looking for connection and love and wants so badly for this to be the time you aren't rejected. So it feels like a slap in the face. You're right, if you don't put yourself out there, it doesn't hurt as bad!!! But you will also end up missing out on a lot.

And just know, you are NOT in the wrong for being hurt by those situations. I would be hurt too. I've been upset with a few friends lately who are always "so excited" to see me, but then if I spend a couple days NOT travelling to them, they will straight up ignore me or refuse to come over because it isn't worth their time. That shit hurts. So this college friend? I'd be upset too in your position. Likewise the running situation? I've been the third friend trailing behind another two while they talk. I've straight up stopped and watched them not realize, at all, that I wasn't with them anymore. Again, that hurts. GOOD friends? Don't do that. Or, if they do, they're willing to apologize and correct the behaviour. At least, friends who are good for you!

Also I'm probably gonna prove your point right that most people suck LOL but I'm sorry I have such a hard time answering your asks sometimes!! Big blocks of texts are hard for me to respond to unmedicated, or when I'm under the weather, or just... feeling my ADHD symptoms at all. Sounds like an excuse, but I am sorry, and I do always read your full messages, even if I don't respond <33

#anon #abt me #advice

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worlds-end-landmine · 9 months ago

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little miss #1 academic weapon in just 1 month suddenly does not feel like doing any of her assignments...

rant got long so im putting a read more

and i am starting my finals projects for my program rn that if i fail one i might not be able to graduate high school OR my program lmaoooo

so yeah im like

i should be gentle on myself! one step at a time! but my inability to maintain normal friendships and parents who cant consider the stress im under and just go "lol just do your hw fast tf?' makes this sososososo hard

i kinda just wanna be selfish and be like today im going out! to a bookstore! then a game store! maybe buy some snacks too! and when i get home i can read and make tea! but LMAOOO

i cant drive yet despite being mf 17 (parents wont let me) OR go out whenever i want in general

this is a frequent thing i cry abt btw

not being able to go out for a walk when i want, and how ive never gone out of the house by myself/with friends

never been able to have a "hang out" like all the people i know at school do

and i literally blocked all irls from my school so they can never find my insta accts OR me seeing them

cuz ofc they post their highlights in life and istg these past 2 school breaks one of them would pop up and i'd just start crying

its like... i dont wanna be a shut-in but im forced? idfk

im just going on a tangent this post prob makes 0 sense but tbh idgaf

#claire.txt

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unearthlydream · 10 months ago

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im sad and can't focus on work so instead time to scream into the fucking void so it at least looks like i'm trying to write this story thats due at the end of the day.

i keep finding myself thinking "i wish things were normal" and wishing i could go back to pre-Oct 31 and how things were before all of these things happened. but i don't think there is a noraml to get back to and i think that this is just what my life is now. and idk how to cope with that tbh lol ijust wanna jump off a building

i want to be able to see my friends and talk to people and work on craft projects but instead all i do is sit at home in silence after work dissociating into a game or a tv show because i don't have the energy. i can't lie and mask my way through life anymore and i feel uncomfortable w the fact that i can't have a conversation with anyone without them inevitably asking how i am or what i've been up to. how can i even engage with people when i have nothing positive to share and most of the convos just end up with "i'm so sorry, let me know if you need anything"??

my mom has been on and off dying (thankfully off for good now i think? long recovery process) since december. i've cared for my grandpa from oct 31-dec only for him to now be on palliative care. my family is being so normal and cool about it and i'm the youngest one and being forced to deal with all of their issues because my aunt and uncle can't be not self centered for once in their lives-- and obv my mom is dying and my grandma is grieving and helping w my mom so like who else is gonna take care of things and manage people's emotions and be a shoulder to cry on?

so i'm actually doing horribly and don't have the capacity to make up lies anymore. and what have i been up to? spending tons of time in hospitals and then getting various illnesses because people can't seem to mask up in a fucking hospital of all places!!! i don't have the energy to lie anymore bc i'm funneling everything i have into just waking up in the morning and doing thebare minimum to make sure i do'nt die and my household is clean enough that it's not a danger to my cat.

and even when my friends and partnersask like 'how can i support you' -- idfk put a bullet in my brain??? like no one can do anything to help me. i'm alone andhave always been alone and will always be alone and forced to be the mommy in every situation and i'm so tired. i just don't want tot hink. but then when i say 'it stresses me out that you're waiting on me to make the plans for groceries or doing laundry and i just need you to get it done,' i hurt peoples feelings and i'm being too rough.

i'm just so tired. i'm so fucking tired and i wish my brain didn't go from zero to "just kill yourself" so quickly. i wish i knew what i needed and how tomake it better. i feel like my stupid ass needs to be committed. i'm worried about self harming again as i already relapsed late last year amidst all of this. i'm worried one day i'll be so lcose to the end of my rope that i'll act on one of my impulsive thoughts and make things worse for myself.

i don't wanna worry anymore but i think that's just what's in the cards for me. which is like... doubly scary bc of the genetic lottery i've already won (mom had a stroke in her 40s and now is dealing with all of this which like.... most of it is caused by stress and not taking care of herslef and i'm falling down that same rabbit hole without my consent which is so cool and funky fresh).

and the worst part... i don't even think things would be easier if i died. the guilt of knowing what i'm leaving behind won't even let it in the realm of possibility.

this is so long. i might delete this later. but like holy fuck. a bitch needs a fuckin break. a bitch needs a resource officer or somethnig like hold fuck.

#personal

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consistent-self-destruction · 1 year ago

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oh wow, the last time i posted was basically exactly a year ago lol.

well both a lot and nothing's changed much, i'm back to b emo again so that alone should say enough without saying anything

if anything things have gotten WORSE lmfao, i'm literally not supposed to be here right now but unfortunately the attempt fucking failed

nobody tells you how embarrassing that is - how did you fail at everything INCLUDING trying to kill yourself LMFAO, LIKE DAMN YOU REALLY CANT WIN

okay im being silly to cope but idk. when i got in touch with my counselor after it happened, she asked how much i wanted to be alive here on a scale from 1-10, with 10 being i literally wanna die right now in this instant, and 1 being miraculous healing and lifetime peace. the first day after i told her 8.5. three days later i said 3. it's a few weeks later now, and ive realized that my answer to the question has been sliding up and down everyday.

this is not even what i wanna talk about, i don't know how i ended up talking about that lol. anyway actually wait ANOTHER sb but artists im obsessed with rn: ka$hdami and 6arelyhuman okay moving on now ummm im trying so hard to be a 1 on that scale and maintain optimism and hope but like things keep going wrong and everything keeps irritating me and i genuinely feel like shit and i dont want to feel like shit because freaking 2014 just started, the year just started but unfortunately i am not optimistic about this year at all - i can't predict what will happen or how it will go or feel, everything is uncertain and im tired of being so unsure and incapable and it makes me want to leave earth because it's all just so tiring and now im just rambling hhhhh

to gather my thoughts coherently.. im bleeding out my fucking gooch. my charger is broken and wont charge my phone unless it's at an angle. my back camera is broken, my phone's been having storage issues, i don't feel pretty these days, i don't know what to do with my hair, it's freaking cold as hell in my house, i've got a sore throat, the only bathroom in the house with a bathtub has cold water so i can't take any soothing baths which is one of the best parts of being home, my sleep schedule is entirely in reverse, and i just feel so energetically exhausted. the house is a mess and my room is cluttered and my mom wants me to take down the christmas decorations, and i WANT to because cleaning makes me feel productive but i just don't have the stamina or ENERGY, like i feel physically sick and unwell and irritated and run down and incapable and i hate it so much, why is 2024 already off to the worst. and that's just in the present tense. in the future tense, like i said i am not optimistic about this year at all. i anticipate it being a really really difficult year and it makes me wanna cry because i don't wanna do it but i know i need to. you know how they say you have to get through the storm to see the other side? or some shit like that idfk, i dont wanna go through the storm! im so tired of the rain im so tired of being cold im so tired of goosebumps and anxiety and uncertainty and all of it !!!!!!! i've been trying to find my way through a storm for YEARS and it has not let up ONCE. i want to stop but i tried doing that and the universe just took me off pause and made me keep going, why couldn't they just let me join the stars. it would've been so much easier.

instead i have to stay here and try my best to heal and recover and work around my issues but i just can't imagine it, i can't imagine getting better i just don't see it. i can daydream about a version of myself that's better and stronger all i want, but i know in my heart that she'll never exist because i've been trying to be her for years and i just can't get there. i keep falling short. i keep failing. i keep taking L after L after L and im just. so. tired. i don't want to try anymore.

it's not always like this. sometimes there will be something that motivates me and makes me feel inspired to live again. but it always passes by and i come back to these feelings and this state. i keep falling back into this hole and it's such an exhausting up and down and back and forth.

the reason im here being emo again is i just feel like i can't talk to anyone about this. usually when i come back to this freaking blog that's the case. i always come back here when i have feelings that i need to release but i dont feel comfortable sharing with anyone. i don't wanna say anything on my spam because i don't want anyone to see all this negativity and darkness in me, and i don't want my close friends and innocent people to be randomly laden with this kind of depressing energy just as the year FRESH started and they're only casually scrolling their feed. you know what i mean? i hate scrolling my feed and seeing depressing shit. i don't wanna do that to my friends. i want peace and good vibes and good energy and a clean refreshing start to the year for them. i want them to be happy. i dont wanna post on my spam something that will gut their heart out, bring their mood down, and make them see me different. and it's the same with my best friend. not so much the last part cause they already know all these sides of me. and that is really relieving. but the only reason why i hold back from telling them this right now is because of the first reason - the year just started. they don't need this energy. we've already been having realtalks that are depressing enough. they dont need me calling them and texting them every time i feel depressed and manic and lost - that would be so shitty and i hate people who do that. it's energy stealing and self-centered. and for obvious reasons i don't talk to my family about these things. so i am left with this silly little blog, my beautiful void. oh how i love speaking into the void. it gives the illusion of speaking to someone without actually speaking to anyone. it's a perfect release.

but yeah idk, long story short im on my period, im sick with a sore throat, freezing in my house, feeling ugly and tired and incapable and irritated, with an inability to find optimism for the future and worst of all NO HOES! <;/3333

dude.. no because my love life is an entirely different type of pain. it's so... dude.

in the very least, i should be starting long-term therapy this year. that's the plan at least. my counselor gave me some recommendations, offices to call, and i have my dad's support. i'm gonna call in the numbers either tomorrow or thursday. i say this as "in the least" because even though i know it's supposed to be helpful, im not too optimistic about it. i don't like how many times i've used that word smfh. but im not - i don't really look forward to opening up about my 5 billion issues to a complete stranger. i have a hard enough time with the idea of how people perceive me. when i first started having sessions with my counselor, it really did not help because i didn't open up to her in the way i was supposed to. i told her surface level shit and sugar coated things instead of telling her the important things. im worried im only going to do that again. i don't like people seeing the worst of me - even when im PAYING them to see that side of me and when i NEED to show that side of me in order to FIX it. rahhhhhh. i also don't really look forward to it because i just see it as something large and overwhelming and unsolvable. my mental health that is. i don't look forward to tackling it in therapy. for only once a week? with that rate it's gonna take YEARS for me to figure myself out. and not only do i not have that kind of time, but it sounds so frustrating - slow agonizing progress, if any progress is made at all. im in such a pessimistic mood right now and i'm really not always like this - but this is also just the logical side of my brain. i just don't see it working out. i want it to. i want it to work badly - that's why we're going to try it. but i still am not optimistic about what the outcome will be and i am more daunted by the emotional and mental energy it will take out of me. i am second guessing if i should do school at the same time as therapy. i don't think any of this will go well. i only see myself getting consumed by things all over again - losing energy and motivation and time and getting depressed when everything goes wrong again. i think i might just also be scared by the process of healing. healing itself is not scary - but the process is terrifying. i don't trust it. i don't know if it will work. every time i thought i was healing i was just spiraling into a new unknown. the process of healing sounds so energetically draining, it sounds so deceptive, it sounds so emotionally torturing, it sounds fake, and it sounds incredibly time consuming and i already am NOT in time's favor. so i guess that's why i am not optimistic about this year - because i already know what the theme is. i already know what my focus is. this year for me, is all about healing and learning myself better. learning how to overcome my worst habits, my worst thoughts and emotions, and navigate situations that trigger them. this year is intended to be the year i start therapy. the year i put my mental health in the spotlight after years of trying to navigate it and figure it out on my own. i know the fact that im going to have professional support and guidance is supposed to be encouraging, but im so focused on the fact that there is so MUCH i need support and guidance with - and i need to tackle all of it once a week.. while in school... engaging with the very environment that deeply triggers me as i try not to be triggered, figure out ways around being triggered, SUCCEED at not getting triggered so i can therefore succeed in my academic environment, AND also figure out ways to make money on my own on the side. and that's not even going into deeper detail. idk, i just have so many needs to meet, and a billion things on my mind - obligations, responsibilities, needs, and they're all scrambled up in this big black scribble in my brain that's so thick i can hardly see through to the other side. and i don't like that blockage. i don't like that lack of foresight and clarity. i don't like the uncertainty. it makes me nervous and hesitant and resistant. i want to resist this year and this life so badly.

but all in all im just so tired. as always. it never goes away. the rage and frustration and exhaustion it just never goes away and i just really want a long long hug and a nice backrub.

please.

- 1.3.24 | 1:05 AM -

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sirensunrise · 2 years ago

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Yuta in 5sos was a thought not so much for the music which is Very Pop but more for the culture with the groupie but not so much hardcore shit. But nah, you right you right. I recognise like 75% the groups you mention and am familiar with 50% but agree with all.

Would love to see Hongjoong and yoongi call some bitches out. They would actually be very fun to get drunk/high with and get them ranting and heated about the industry and politics and the world. I just- ugh. Hot boys getting angry and passionate makes them so much hotter. Got any clips or links on hand for us to revel in outspoken and honest idols with company freedom? If nah, all g, enjoy your buzz without doing research.

Hello, yes. I am now here and sober and have done the things I needed to do today so now i can be here and do this.

The interesting thing about both ateez and bts is that their whole concepts started with a "we represent the youth, we want to rebel against outdated rules and restrictions and live our own lives. we want freedom." bts, obviously, kinda abandoned that concept down the road. ateez, however, is still going strong. Even if the songs themselves don't have anything to do with that message, the meta narrative continues the storyline in that direction. I mean so much of the recent ateez content is underground resistance themed. Hongjoong also has an insane amount of creative control when it comes to concepts and the storyline, a lot of it is his vision. We mentioned the rhythm ta performance from kingdom, the man really said we out here spreading the gospel of resistance. The visuals of the guerrilla video really drive that home. The amount of historical and cultural references are amazing. [x] (joong said workers revolution) Also the bands joong listens too... it’s all there baby. And speaking of bands they listen to/ musical origins. Yoongi is from a very hip hop background which is incredibly similar. (One of my fav groups is Run the Jewels and there’s this great interview they did about the similarities in culture and meaning in both rock and rap [x]) Let’s also not forget lil miss part-timer min yoongi, my working class king. A lot of it is reading between the lines. There’s only so much an idol can outright say. In terms of onhand things i really only have yoongi dunking on exams lmao. I’d have to Search to find the other shit, and for that i am sorry. I’m sure there are also a bunch of lyrics in verses that carry similar sentiments.

Either way, you’re so fucking correct, they are both so hot and I respect them both so much, I wanna be able to go off about industry and music and art and so so so much. I wanna talk about symbolism and artistic interpretation and ways to evoke emotions in different art forms and mediums. Joong wanted to go into film at one point in his life which like, same, and yoongi just knows so much about everything I wanna talk to him about history and humanity and idfk light fixtures.

#mailbox💌#anon #thank u for these asks i love them so much #i have so many opinions all the time.#especially on industry and concepts #i love stories #also if u listen to a specific run the jewels track from their second album...#you may recognize it #might've gotten repurposed for a certain rap monster solo song #lots of fun cross industry shit there #also just listen to run the jewels in general #absolutely genius producers and performers

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lunaastoir · 4 years ago

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fluff/relationships w the liyue crew

characters included: xiao, childe, beidou, and zhongli

ik i forgot ningguang i promise i’ll include her in part 2, i just didn’t have time :(

all x a gn! reader

my liyue babies :,) ft. ningguang in spirit

an: i was listening to my soft playlist (more like listening to cupid’s chokehold on repeat, no i am not basic 🔪) and i thought some fluff headcanons would be cute w these sweet people

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

xiao

ok so no surprise that he hates liyue harbor

he hates anything w a lot of people in it so he prefers to stay at wangshu inn tyvm

but by contrast, you love liyue harbor sm (it’s gorgeous i mean c’mON)

you go there often to retrieve your commissions in order to stay closer to xiao (liyue harbor is closer than mondstadt he argues but you’re well aware that they’re both equally far away)

so if anyone asked, xiao would absolutely refuse to go to the harbor like i hate people??? why would you even ask???

but,,,he’s so sOFT for you

if you asked??? he would agree in a heartbeat

but since he’s >:( angsty boy, he makes you think that he won’t go even when he’s already decided that he’s coming w you

he puts up the “if you so require, then i guess i will assist you with your travels in liyue harbor” but in reality he would definitely have said yes even without the almond tofu

while he hates the harbor, he thinks that with you anything is bearable :,) simp

you take him to see xinyan to vibe w her music and you can tell he really enjoys it

even tho he’s like 🕴 the entire time, you see the softer look on his face and the very slight smile on his lips as he listens to the music and watches the crowd

so so so cute very soft for him

i do see him as a subtly touchy person in public like brushing the hair off your face, swiping his thumb across your cheek, or gently pulling your hair back when you have a plate of food in your hands

the type to link your pinkies together - he claims it’s so you don’t get lost but yk better

after the concert is done you take him to that one waypoint near mt. tianheng and the both of you just watch the city lights and the way they reflect beautifully on the water surrounding the harbor

personal headcanon that xiao absolutely loves stargazing since he believes the stars are the one true constant in his life especially since he’s experienced so much loss (basically they’ll never leave him god i hate myself why do i make everything SAD)

mini headcanon off of that - he doesn’t stargaze with people,,, like ever

it’s something he loves to do alone so the fact that he lets you stargaze w him and even allows you to shift your head onto his lap while you watch the sky is a huge deal

he loves it when you softly whisper abt how your day was or something you saw that made you laugh

he just loves hearing your voice, it automatically calms the voices in his head

you absolutely ADORE when he has flowers in his hair especially cecilias (cecillias? ceccillias? idfk) and you make a point whenever you go to mondstadt to pick a fresh batch of cecilias just for xiao while enlisting the help of your favorite bard

these soft moments on the mountain are usually when you’ll sweetly tuck in a flower or two in his hair while laughing

he’ll blush fiercely while looking away but will tuck the cecilias in securely as you’re unable to do so due to the position you’re in on his lap

all in all - this was not meant to come out as a date idea but we’re going w it

this is so cute xiao pls let me put flowers in your hair sweet boy <3

childe

god, loml, my favorite war criminal after eren yeager

there’s never a dull moment w this man - if you wanted peace and quiet, why the hell are you dating him bestie???

is the type of person to yell out “Y/N, i can’t believe i ran into you here!” if he sees you somewhere even tho you explicitly told him you were going to be here in the morning (ik you have a good memory ajax don’t lie to me 😐)

i don’t see him as being obnoxious w pda unlike someone else kaeya but he would definitely participate (think: handholding, cheek kisses, an arm around your shoulders)

loves it when he comes home and sees you in an apron cooking

domesticity just makes his heart melt so you can be sure that your face will be peppered w a lot of kisses afterwards <3

absolutely ADORES it when you trace his scars absentmindedly when you’re lying down or even when you’re having dinner in public

he’s been far from his family for so long that small acts of mindless affection like this really make his heart happy

you have him drunk on your love luv haha see what i did there

he will let you put makeup on him. no i do not take criticism ⛄️

he already has on lowkey thick eyeliner,,, don’t be shy put some more bestie

he will shamelessly go out in public w whatever you made him wear - doesn’t really give a shit even tho he has a reputation to maintain

speaking of reputation,,, yk his mask? yeah that one - the red hair accessory that he has on his head

well on the mask, he attached a little charm the both of you got together on your first date during lantern rite

it’s this adorable fox that we all shamelessly kill for meat and he placed it so it anchored to the side of his mask so when he fights it isn’t a nuisance or anything (does that make sense??? i hope it does)

his subordinates notice and while they’re stoic around childe, behind closed doors they do whisper abt the mysterious person who’s captured his heart

not so mysterious anymore when they literally see him cling onto you during his daily patrol around the harbor 💀

it’s ok tho he’s lucky he’s cute

bestie,,, pls give him a neck massage

i just KNOW he’s tense there idk something abt the way he carries himself just screams “my neck hurts so bad someone pls help me i would ask but my pride literally will not let me”

so give him a neck massage :) don’t worry tho he’ll definitely return the favor and then some

LOVES TICKLE FIGHTS

he’s obsessed w them,,, it’s just the faces you make??? he can’t get enough

he loves seeing the pure joy and the brief fear (he’s kind of a sadist) in your eyes before he attacks you w those damned hands

it reminds him a lot of simpler times w his siblings and he’s happy he brings you joy and makes you forget your worries - at least for a little while

all in all, he’s a good boy and no i will not tolerate childe slander 🔪 kaeya slander tho 😏

beidou

you pulled beidou??? wow everyone’s jealous (pulled as in literally from the banner and in this context but no i do not have beidou and no i definitely do not want to talk abt it)

god made beidou and zhongli just so all of us could have a sexuality crisis

anyways, being w her is hard i will not lie

not bc she isn’t a capable lover - no, quite the contrary

she’s an amazing partner but the problem here lies in the fact that she’s almost never on land

it’s hard working a long distance relationship but y’all love each other so it works out :,)

when she is physically present however, expect to never be bored

she’ll quietly fix the wrinkles on your shirt or fiddle with your fingers in her hands while she recounts her adventures out on sea

she sometimes gets worried she bores you, however the way your eyes light up every time she tells a tale always reassures her otherwise

definitely the type to let you use her claymore if you want to learn

she’ll provide useful tips as she tucks her hands into your sides gently, positioning you correctly so you don’t hurt yourself

miss girl is an AMAZING cook

i just know she cooks the best meals - i mean she’s friends w xiangling after all

whenever she comes home from a voyage she’ll always insist on making something for you even if she’s abt to pass out

pls tuck her into bed and promise her that she can make you something in the morning <3 the poor woman needs rest

brings you back trinkets but they’re actually very practical

she knows you won’t have much use for a simple charm (not that there’s anything wrong w that) but she believes you’ll like something practical more so she might get you a new engraved knife from the most recent place she’s been to

definitely the type to surprise you when she docks

i can imagine her anchoring her ship out a little ways from liyue harbor and rowing to the dock in order to make sure you aren’t alerted of her presence (i’m sorry the mental picture this made in my mind is SENDING ME INTO ORBIT but she means well i love you)

will take you to remote spots she’s found in her travels through liyue

for example - the little heart shaped island and the island quest (?) that you had to use kaeya the bridge maker for in order to get to im sorry i’ll stop w the kaeya slander

she’ll get you seashell bracelets or necklaces idk why but she gives me those vIBES

they’re super nice ones too, only the highest quality for you

yes she’s a bruh girl but i also see her as someone who would enjoy intimate moments like watching the sunset or something

“yo wanna catch the sunset, i heard it looks sick from the jade chamber” said before ahem it yk fell from the sky

kasdjksfashfjsahf yes ofc i would love to catch the sunset w you pls come home luv

anyways, she is a woman i would give the world for

zhongli

ok gimme a sec i need to get my gentleman mode on

this man,,, THIS MAN

everything w him is so soft like your entire eXISTENCE w him could go in a museum it’s that beautiful

in the morning when he visits you, he always brings you a cup of your favorite tea and a bouquet of glaze lilies he got from madame ping

holds the door for you, pushes the chair out for you, uses a napkin and brushes sauce off your lips when you’re eating - you name something sweet, he’s done it

secretly loves it when you fuss over him

he doesn’t like to fight but say he encountered a group of hillichurls he couldn’t avoid and promptly defeated them but ended up tearing a part of his tux(?) (is it a tux? i could not tell you)

not that big of a deal, i mean it’s a scratch, he’s a 6,000 year old god, he’s dealt w much worse

but seeing the worried crease in your brows as you usher him to sit at the table while quickly grabbing antiseptic to clean his wound

“it’s just a scratch, my dear. do not worry i’ve dealt with much worse.”

you quietly protest abt how “yes zhongli, i understand you’re an archon and have gotten worse injuries but i’m worried about infection just please let me take care of you ok? <3″

when you say that he feels weird emotions,,, wdym take care of him?

he’s always taken care of himself or been expected to take care of others as the former ruling deity of liyue so having someone else genuinely worry abt his wellbeing creates a warm feeling in his chest

he strikes me as the type to knit you something??? idk maybe it’s the grandpa vibes but i headcanon that he would knit you a scarf for the colder weather, it’s cute

in the privacy of your home, he really likes picking you up

he loves it when you wrap your legs around his middle while he gets up to go do the dishes or smthg

domesticity go brrrr

if you’re into making flower crowns, he would totally have you on his lap and wordlessly hand you a glaze lily whenever you expectantly hold your hand out while weaving the flowers together

he expects you to make the crown for yourself but when you place the crown on his head and it fits perfectly while simultaneously tucking a glaze lily behind your ear, he looks at you dumbstruck

his mouth parts open in awe and it’s quite literally the cutest thing

you’ve broken him

thinks it’s the sweetest thing - will keep it on his head for the whole day

he’ll even put it in water before he sleeps so it won’t wilt and he can wear it the next day <3

scenic picnics!! scenic picnics!!

the type to take you to the nicest spots in liyue to chat abt the history of the land w you over a cup of tea and your favorite food (whatever you like, he doesn’t mind)

recounts the people he’s met in his long life before finishing off by saying you’re by far the best person he’s met

zhongli strangles lovingly come home soon

thanks for reading! if you have any requests don’t hesitate to send them in <3

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smutsonian · 4 years ago

Note

okay but,, imagine if the reader had been a complete brat and gone out without letting Lee know. He waned her before about the dangers out there and that he wont always be there to save her. This gives him an idea. Lee decides to scare her by locking her up in a prison cell with Robert Pronge. Lee lets him do whatever he wants for the next few hours and even sits himself in a chair to get a better look..

ababahhaha aAhaha ahb WIAT LET ME BREATHE GOR A SECOND

lesson learned

lee bodecker x reader x robert pronge

warnings: dark, noncon, voyeurism, slight angst, posessive lee, creepy robert, not proofread!

word count: 1.4k

a/n: idfk how to do the keep reading thingy on mobile. Also I TRIED AND OMFG I JUST REALLY LIKE SOFT DARK CHARACTERS OKAY?!

masterlist

You asked Lee if you can go to the store later but when he told you that he’ll be doing extra shifts, you told him that you can go on your own. Lee didn’t like the idea of you going out on your own and he decided to give you a speech about the dangers of the outside world.

“Anyone can hurt you!”

“Anyone can just take you. In a blink, you’re gone. Taken away from me. Do you want that? Do you want someone to take you away from me?”

“No.”

“So don’t go out without me. Don’t go out by yourself, got it?” He was so angry and adamant but you really wanted to go out. You needed to go to that store.

So you decide to ignore Lee and go to the fucking story anyway.

Of course, Lee finds out. He’s the sheriff and everyone basically works for him. So it’s not a surprise that someone tattled on you.

He drove straight to the shop, guiding you back in his cruiser, almost as if you’re being arrested but he let you sit on the passenger’s side. He was quiet throughout the ride which was scary because he’s usually mouthy when he’s mad but when he’s quiet…

He’s really really mad.

Your anxiety only got worse when he missed the turn to your house and straight to the station.

He stopped the car before quickly getting out, walking towards your side, and helping you out. Even mad, he still guides you.

You follow him inside, frowning when he grabs your arm before pushing you inside a cell with a strange man. You ignored the man, watching Lee as he closed the gates before getting a chair and placing it just in front of your cell.

“Such a pretty little face…” the strange man says from behind you. Your skin prickles when you feel him getting closer to you and you glance at Lee with tearful and frightened eyes.

“L-Lee what’s ha-happening?” You watch Lee’s jaw clench and unclench before he adjusts himself on the chair.

“I told you not to go out on your own, didn’t I?” He asks, giving you a glare.

“You did.” You confirm.

“But you still went out.” He hisses.

“But I still went out…” You repeat, bowing your head in shame.

“I’m sorry, Lee… I just really wanted to buy—” You try to reach for the paper bag but then Lee grabs it through the gaps of the cell before tossing it aside.

“Doesn’t matter what you needed to buy, darling. You still disobeyed me. I’m not making rules for my own good here, sweetheart. I’m making them for you.” He shakes his head in disappointment, making your heart clench in regret.

“I’m sorry, Lee! I really am!” You cry, not aware of the hungry look that the strange man behind you is giving you.

“I won’t do it again. I promise!” Your hands clamped around the bars, reaching out to Lee. He grabs your hands before giving each a kiss and letting them go.

“Oh, you won’t do it again. I’m pretty sure of that…” He smiles before loosening his belt.

“I learned my lesson, Lee. I won’t do it again. Please let me out…” You whisper, eyes blurred with tears as you begged him. You could see conflict in his eyes as if he’s fighting with himself.

“Oh, you will learn your lesson, sweetheart. I know it’s hard to teach you some manners but this time, I’m pretty sure you’ll learn.” He nods at the man behind you before you feel yourself being dragged back to the stranger’s chest.

“That’s Robert. He’ll help you learn a simple lesson, sweetheart.” Lee smiles before leaning back against his chair.

“Nice to meet ya, pretty face!” The man behind you, Robert, cheers before tearing your clothes apart. You were too shocked to react and you only snapped out of it when you felt his rough hands palming your breasts.

“L-Lee!” Your voice cracks at Lee, desperate and scared.

“I know, sweetheart. It’s scary but you have to learn!” Lee frowns before nodding at Robert once more.

You feel a kiss on your cheek before his hot breath fans your ear.

“This’ll be quick, baby. Just gotta teach ya a lesson like your daddy told you…” You whimper when your hair is yanked backward and a stinging sensation fills your body when Robert forces his cock inside you.

Your screams seemed to turn Robert on because he only went faster and harder, ignoring your sobs and seemingly enjoying the scratches that your nails are giving his arms. He uses your breasts as a handle to keep your body against him while his hips continue to rut into you.

“Ow!” You cry out when you feel his teeth biting into your neck when a loud bang comes from the metal bars.

“Don’t fucking bite her, Pronge!” Lee’s voice was strained and you looked at him, seeing him stroking his cock while his eyes continued to glare at Robert.

“My bad…” Robert chuckles before wiping the skin that he bit and placing a kiss on it.

“Sorry, baby…” He continues to rut into you and you see Lee matching the rhythm that Robert is using to pound into you.

Robert easily manipulates your body so you’re on your knees and he forced your face down against the floor only to be yanked up so a pillow could be placed against your face.

“Gotta keep that pretty face comfortable…” Robert chuckles before patting your cheek and crawling behind you.

“Ready or not…” Robert sings before seething himself inside you with the same rhythm as before only this time, his cock enters deeper, hitting a spot that always made your legs shake.

“Slap her ass,” you hear Lee’s quiet voice and you look back at him who seems to be close with how his hips are jerking against his hand.

Robert smacks your left cheek hard, earning a loud yelp from you. He continued pounding you from behind, groaning and pleasure as your walls started to clench around his throbbing cock.

“You can cum, baby,” Lee’s voice reaches your ear. You didn’t want to cum on Robert’s cock but his hand finds its way to your cunt, fingers playing with your clit, eager to pull a release from you.

He didn’t have to wait long because soon, you were a crying mess while your whole body shakes on the floor as Robert continued to pound into you.

Just when he’s about to cum inside you, he’s pushed out of you by Lee who quickly shoved himself inside of you, thrusting a few times before cumming inside of you, releasing thick and warm coats of his seed.

“Ahh fuck!” Robert exclaims, finishing himself off on your ass.

“You fucking bitch…” Lee growls before wiping Robert’s cum off your ass with a white cloth.

Lee helps you up, wrapping his jacket around you before pulling you close. He tilts your head towards him, a finger on your chin before asking.

“You learned your lesson?”

You only nod at him, eyes tired as they fluttered shut. Lee presses a kiss on your forehead before guiding you up.

“That’s my girl.”

Robert stands up, patting his pants clean before smiling at the sheriff.

“Hey if you wanna help with teaching your girl some manners, you know where to find me,” Robert laughs at the glare that Lee gives him.

“In your fucking dreams”

“Fucking your girl is a dream,” Robert sighs dreamily, looking at your sleeping form against Lee.

“It’s a one time favor, Pronge. Now get the fuck out of here. Our deal is done.” Lee brings you back to his cruiser as Robert follows the both of you.

He stares at your form on the passenger‘s side while Lee closes your door.

“Call me when you need someone dead. I like your method of payment.” Robert snickers.

Lee didn’t like how Robert seems to be infatuated by his girl. Lee couldn’t blame him but you're his. You’re Lee’s and nobody else’s.

“Fuck off, Pronge.”

“Whatever.” Robert steals a glance at you one last time before leaving.

Lee enters the car before driving home. He looks at you before smiling. He knows you only love him. You’re good like that. You just have to be taught some lessons from time to time.

But he’s sure as fuck that he won’t be asking for Robert’s help anymore.

Lee looks at the bag that you were holding earlier and he feels his heart skips a beat when he sees what’s inside.

Candies

“Oh, my baby…” Lee smiles at your sleeping form before pressing a kiss on your nose. He wouldn’t have to worry about Robert.

part two-ish

————

taglist

General: @readermia @unlikelygalaxygiver @xoxabs88xox @anncutamarica @chaoticfiretaconerd @i-love-superhero @caffiend-queen @coconutqueen21 @jtargaryen18 @jennmurawski13 @mushyjellybeans @ninjabucky @evnscvll @buckstaybucky @donutloverxo @rebloggingeverything @adriannajackson @la-cey @awaywithtime @gotnofucks @empath-bunny @belovedcherry @white-wolf1940 @the-soulofdevil @mianorth @littlegasps

Anything Chris: @patzammit @princess-evans-addict @shadowcatsworld @notyourtypicalrose @onetwo3000 @bluemusickid @heyiamthatbitch @inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @slytherinandoutasgard @chrisevanisliterallysir

Chris and seb: @harrysthiccthighss

#lee bodecker x reader #robert pronge x reader #lee bodecker reader x robert pronge #dark fic #lee bodecker oneshot #dark lee bodecker #dark robert pronge #dark lee bodecker x reader #dark robert pronge x reader #dark!fic

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urbfsecretgf · 3 years ago

Note

omg love this fic alr pls keep updating <3

thank y'all for giving me the motivation to write more. here you go :) Pt 4 of: The Boy Next Door

a/n: i didnt think i was gonna continue doing this series but i do appreciate all the people who enjoy it. thank you <3 also idk how well i corrected my spelling errors so my apologies for that.

(everything is made up, arguing, dirty minded things)

________________________________________________________

it was a cold Monday morning and you and jack are standing outside waiting for the bus to arrive at your house.

"its 6:50 the bus should be here already" jack groans

"i know im freezing my ass off its so cold out" you say as you are shivering

the bus finally pulls up to your drive way after what feels like an eternity. you've been at school your new school for about a week now, you know where all your classes were and where your locker was and all of that stuff.

when you get to school the first thing you do is head to your locker and put everything in your locker.

*BZZ*

*New Message From Vinnie <3: y/n where are you???*

you look at it and ignore it. vinnie and you got into a big argument last night and youre still not happy with him.

while putting books in your locker you hear someone start yelling your name

"y/n! has anyone seen y/n? y/n!!"

its vinnie.

"oh gosh" you sigh

"does anyone know where y/n is bro please tell me someone knows"

someone points to where you are, and you try and walk away and pretend not to notice him.

"Y/N!! IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU LITERALLY EVERYWHERE!!! OMG!" he says sounding excited that hes found you.

"haha yeah oops. i gotta go uh bye"

you dont really wanna be around him rn. he upset you pretty badly last night

*FLASHBACK TO LAST NIGHT*

"vinnie you do this literally EVERYTIME!! STOP!"

"no you act like it was bad that i was late i said sorry so its your fault we are arguing right now."

"vinnie i told you if we were late we would miss it. youve been late the past, hmmm, 3 dates? uh yeah i have every right to be upset with you. out of the 5 or so dates you've been on time or early to only 2 and one of those we didnt even get to go to because of the storm. i dont know whats gotten into you recently vinnie but i dont like it so you need to change that or something is going to happen and neither of us are going to like it"

"y/n youre literally overreacting about this. im sorry i was late weve been over this 100 times bro and its just a date we can go on more some other time"

"vinnie you dont understand. those dates mean the world to me. i love going on them with you. i love seeing you all dressed up and coming over so we can go out to a movie or whatever it is we are going to do. they arent 'just dates' to me"

"whatever y/n. this is so stupid. youre freaking out over nothing. ill talk to you later or something idfk"

*END OF FLASHBACK*

"y/n?"

"sorry vin i really gotta go"

"but the bell hasnt even rung yet we still have 8 minutes till class start wym?"

"yep i know bye"

vinnie grabs your arm and gives you a serious look. he knows you hate when he does this look because it makes you feel guilty and like you did something wrong.

"y/n? why are you avoiding me? you didnt answer my texts, you didnt say good morning to me, you hid from me when i was looking for you this morning, whats going on? did something happen? did I do something wrong?"

"vinnie im fine, okay? just leave me alone please."

"im sorry y/n. im sorry about last night and everything i said. i didnt mean it and i dont mean to be late im doing something at home which runs late sometimes and thats why im late. i also dont think to tell you im going to be late either, and im sorry. i really am"

what vinnie says to you makes you tear up a little. you look at him and walk away without saying anything.

"y/n wait! stop y/n come back please"

you love vinnie a lot but he takes it too far sometimes and last night was one of those times. you dont want anything to do with him right now.

________

the bell rings dismissing you for lunch.

"finally" you thought. you were starving.

you go to your locker and grab your lunch. as you were grabbing your lunch box you hear someone crying on the couch in the lounge area.

"i dont know what i did wrong bro. shes been avoiding me all day, she hasnt answered any of my texts ive sent her, and when i apologized to her this morning she walked away. i dont want to loose her bro, it would crush me."

being the curious george you are, you walk over to see who it is, and to your surprise its vinnie, crying, at school, and his friends shoulder.

you decide to walk over to there and you hear his friend austin comforting him

"its okay vinnie, i understand how youre feeling and its normal man. you like her a lot"

"like her a lot??? i dont just like her, im literally in love with her bro."

"vinnie?"

you startled him. he didnt see you there or even notice you were there. he wipes his tears from his face on his sleeve and clears his throat.

"oh hey y/n" he says while still sniffing up his runny nose trying to hide that he was crying

"were you crying?"

"what me? no ofc not"

"i heard you crying vin"

at this point all of his friends left the lounge and let you two be

"nah i wasnt haha"

you knew he was but you decided to let it be.

________

at the end of 4th hour, vinnies friend austin comes over to your locker and tells you what happened

"so he was crying?" you ask

"yeah it was bad, ive never seen him like that before"

"what was it about?"

"did you not hear him?"

"i mean i did kinda but not really"

he looks at you like you're crazy

"y/n he was crying about you. like he literally broke down while sitting on the couch with me and the boys."

hes never cried in front of you before so hearing that he cried in front of other people makes you feel weird. almost a jealous feeling which is weird but you dont really know how to feel.

you brush it off and decide you'll just text him and ask about it later.

________

its now the end of 6th hour, only one more class to go. while walking out of gym class someone runs up to you

"hey, y/n right?"

"um yeah? do i know you?"

it was a guy youve seen around school a few times today. you only have gym class with him but he seems to be pretty well known since everytime youve seen him hes had a big crowd of people around him.

"oh im sorry, im trevor, you can call me trev tho, thats what everyone calls me."

its kinda weird to have a guy come up to you at school. at your old school no one talked to you.

"haha its nice to meet you trev"

"yeah same to you, uh what are you doing tomorrow night?"

"theres no way he flirting with me, i have a boyfriend, everyone knows that right?" you thought to yourself

"oh um probably just homework and studying, why?"

"just wondering, do you need any help with any homework at all?"

"no i dont think so haha."

"alright well if you need any help heres my number."

trevor grabs your hand and writes his number on your hand.

"oh im sorry i-"

*BZZ*

your phone goes off. its a text from vinnie

*New Message From Vinnie <3: meet me by the locker room lovely ;)*

*BZZ*

*New Message From Vinnie <3: Image Recived*

you stare at your phone for a minute, in shock. hes never sent you something like that especially at school.

"y/n? are you okay?" trevor asked seeming a little worried

"HUH? OH YEAH IM GOOD!"

"yeah you seem good now wow."

you decide not to keep vinnie waiting any longer so you decide to end the conversation with trev and go to the locker room "hahahaha yeah okay well i gotta go!"

"alright talk tomorrow?"

"uh maybe" you say as your run off towards the locker room "bye trev'

you get to the locker room and theres vinnie, standing there looking good just like usual

"hey y/n"

"hey vinnie whats this all about?"

"bro im so like... yk.. rn"

"we are at school vin.."

"not even quick?"

not even thinking about it you walk to the family restroom. (and ill let you imagine the rest ;))

________

its the end of the day and the bell rings to dismiss you. trevor stops by your locker and starts a conversation with you.

"hey y/n"

"oh hi trev"

vinnie sees someone at your locker and decides to walk over

"how was your day?"

"it was alri-"

"hey y/n" vinnie interupts, "trevor?"

"vinnie? what are you doing here?'

you can already tell this isnt going to end well so you decide to try and walk away.

vinnie gives trevor a dirty look, "no y/n stay here, dont leave, i wanna know what tf trevor is doing with my girl."

trevor gives the same dirty look he got from vinnie right back to him

"your girl? dont you have like 15 other ones? come on bro, i seen you flirting with bailey like yesterday. you clearly dont care about y/n"

"wait, vin is that true...?" you could never imagine vinnie doing that to you. never. not after what yall have been through, what yall have told eachother, everything.

he looks at you and he can see the sadness on your face, he holds your cheek, "no y/n i love you i would never do something like that to you i promise, go home and we talk about it later after i deal with trev okay?"

youre on the verge of breaking down, your voice is soft, but you manage to say okay.

________

as soon as you get home you run upstairs to your room and throw everything on the floor. you just wanna break down and start baling your eyes out.

you decide to text both trev and vinnie.

*To Trev: hey its y/n did you actually see vinnie flirting with bailey?*

*To Vinnie <3: you didnt actually flirt with bailey did you?*

you set your phone down and just wait. you wait for a response from both vin and trev, wanting answers. you dont wanna believe trevor but you dont know if you can believe vinnie either. youre not trusting either one until you hear both sides of the story in full detail.

*BZZ*

your phone goes off

*New Message from Trev: Yeah I did, yesterday during 2nd hour. They were holding hands, he was hugging her, and that's really all i saw. I'm sorry y/n. You deserve better.*

you burst into tears, how could he do something like that to you?

your little brother jack hears you crying from down the hall and he knocks at your door.

"y/n...? are you okay?

jack and you are really close. you tell eachother everything.

"idk jack."

"did something happen between you and vinnie?"

*BZZ*

"whos that?" jack asked

you look down and see its vinnie

*New Message from Vinnie <3: y/n idk what trevor told you but its not true. he does this all the time to the girls he wants to hookup with. even if it was true i promise you, he wouldnt want anything but your body. i love you more than i love myself y/n. ask austin. i sat on the couch in the lounge today crying about you bc i thought i was going to lose you all bc of the stupid fight we had last night. i love you so much y/n. trevors told me about how hes felt about you from the day you came to school. he told me about how he thinks your hot and about how he could 'steal you away' from me.*

*BZZ*

*New Message from Vinnie <3: y/n i remember our first everything. the first time we met, hung out, hugged, held hands, our first kiss together, first time meeting each others parents, everything y/n. youre the only girl i love. i promise. ill walk over to your house right now if you need me.*

jack was reading the messages from over your shoulder.

"what happened? also invite him over"

after telling jack what happened today you text vinnie and tell him to come over

"jeeze y/n. you got boys fallin harddddddddd" jack says trying to enlighten to mood.

you give him a dirty look and he says sorry.

vinnie knocks on your bedroom door and you go running to him.

"im sorry vinnie, im sorry i didnt believe you. i love you too. way more than you think. i get scared when other people mention you and another girl because as much as i trust you sometimes i feel like you will leave me for someone prettier."

"y/n look at me. i promise you, we are going to get trevor back. im going to do whatever it takes and i have a plan on how we are going to do it."

#vinnie x reader #vinnie hacker #vinnie hacker imagine #vinnie hacker x reader #vhackerr #vincent hacker

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darthkruge · 4 years ago

Note

Yall I'm really curious, when we talk about headcanon/domestic scenarios about Anakin what does he wear like he's obvi not always in his Jedi threads so like what does he wear sweatpants, jeans??? Is he a Jean type of person?? What does my boy where to bed?? Or when you're just chilling??? Does he wear sneakers & if so which ones??? Is it Converse high tops?? Nike dunks??? DO THESE EXISTS IN CORUSCANT??? LIKE I'M SO CURIOUS OMG

ANON YOURE ASKING THE REAL QUESTIONS YESSS 👀👀

Okay okay so first off I love thinking about this bc like what do they wear ?!?

I legit strongly believe Anakin wears sweatpants to bed. I also think he runs hot so he doesn’t wear a shirt. But like- sweats are a yes. Idk why I just really can see him wearing them.

To add onto that, I think when you’re just chilling at home mans wears like his sweats + a soft but lowkey form fitting black t shirt.

This brings me to my point that I think Anakin really likes soft and/or looser clothing. First, it’s similar to the jedi robes bc those cloaks are soft idfk. And they just need to be able to move, y’know? Second, I think rough textures would be uncomfy for him. Lowkey I tie this into the sand thing from growing up on Tatooine; anything that reminds him of that coarse texture he would be like opposed to.

So I kinda don’t think he’d go for jeans all too often.

I was inspired by that one scene in attack of the clones y’know the one where his back looks really good and he’s wearing that loose tunic and the dark kinda loose pants?? Yeah I think that’s kinda what he would wear when he’s like casually walking around.

For shoes omfg idk?!? I think he likes his black boots because he’s used to them. Like perhaps he just vibes with them. But for the sake of modern shoes... hmmm.... idk idkkk other than black like lace up boots (i just see him wearing them akdkaksj) maybe converse?! I am not sure why... I’m kinda getting converse vibes from that man (perhaps im just projecting bc i fucking love converse).

Also I wholeheartedly believe that whatever shoes he has, he will wear them til there are literal holes in them and they are falling apart at the seams. Growing up the way he did, he’d never like throw away clothing or really be wasteful in any way unless he absolutely has to.

I get sweatshirt vibes from him. Like Anakin would like sweatshirts. Idk why. Cant explain it, I just do. Obi-Wan on the other hand 👀 he wears sweaters and I stand by it.

ALSO HE CAN WEAR THE FUCK OUT OF A SUIT LIKE OMFG 😤😤😤😤 I STAND BY THIS 😤😤 and you lowkey be like drooling and he knowsss he looks good but he’d still innocently be like “...what?”

And do they exist in Coruscant? Idk. The brands specifically, probably not. But in my head... yes ✌️

Okay those are my thoughts if anyone else has theirs PLEASE share I wanna know what y’all think 👀

Also anon your message had the literal best vibes like I read it and I was like “fUCK YES” like not just your questions (which just YES) but like the way you phrased it and your energy is fucking immaculate. Just wanted to let you know !!

#megan’s inbox :)#anakin thoughts #anon #anakin headcanons

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snickiebear · 4 years ago

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yo nadia <3333 i'm bored in my online classes and u reblogged the questions thingy at the right time lmao, so get ready: 1, 4, 5, 9, 10, 17, 23, 24, 28, 30!!!, 34, 38, 39, 40 (the intimacy of being understood) (imma stop here lol) (also i'm sorry u're not feeling well, ily and hope u'll feel better soon!! <33333)

ELE ILY. (and thank you, i’m stayin home today cause,,, yeah. i appreciate you sm.) you’re the literal best, i adore you.

1. How long ago did you start reading fanfiction? Writing fanfiction?

The first fanfiction i read was for The Lunar Chronicles when I was like 11?? and it was 100% on accident and it scarred me because it was a hardcore porn one with a period kink and i was like WHAT IS THIS??? OH MY GOD???? LMAOOOOO i didn’t pick it back up until i was 13-14 and really got into the Fairy Tail fandom. I still reread my favorites on ff.net cause i love them.

As for writing, I wrote a horrible, terrible x-men fanfiction when I was twelve. (my friend still brings it up and REFUSES to delete it so it still gets comments and views, that shit HAUNTS ME ELE.) then tried again for Fairy Tail, posted like two chapters before taking it down cause i wasn’t really feeling it. And then I posted The Intimacy Of Being Understood and here we are.

4. Link your three favorite fics right now.

OMGG okok

@murd3rm1ttens ‘s The Problem How Time Works IF YOU HAVENT READ THIS YOU GUYS NEED TO HOP ON IT ASAP. MITTEN’S WRITING SO SO SO SO GOOD. SAKURA AND INO ARE TOTAL BADASSES. KAKASHI IS A SIMPPPP. ITS SO FUCKING GOOD.

@mouseymightymarvellous ‘s We Were Screaming In Color (Only A Possibility) yes, yes I KNOW. i always point into mousey’s direction but i WILL always advocate that everyone reads her fics, they’re literally so beautiful???? i just happen to be rereading WWSIN rn

@safelycapricious ‘s Shaking Up And Breaking Down series. I found this like?? idfk but i’ve been raving about it ever since. ALSO CHECK OUT THEIR FICS IN GENERAL.

fuck i have more than three but also check out @ambivalens999 ‘s Masks

i do wanna make a fic rec thing where i just rav about my favs,,, might do that later or sum

5. What are your fanfic pet peeves? Do they have a huge effect on whether or not you decide to read something?

Omniscient third person. I don’t like it. Like I can understand that it can be a little hard to stay in one person’s perspective but, in my opinion, if you can, it shows how disciplined you are as a writer. Plus, i just get so confused when I go from A’s thoughts to suddenly what B is thinking about A.

When writers use ‘ ‘ instead of “ “. When writers put thoughts in ‘ ‘ instead of just italicizing them. It’s small things but like they just bother me sO MUCH. most of the time i can ignore it and try to enjoy but other times i just dip.

9. Tag 3 fic writers you think are underrated/unknown in the fandom/fanfiction community.

@espoir-et-reves !!!!! THEIR SHISAKU FICS ARE SO SO SO SO SO GOOD. And they have a warring states one going on THAT I AM SO OBSESSED WITH.

@writer168 idk if they’re really “underrated” but THEY HAVE SUCH GREAT FICS ON AO3. Like theres an AU with sakura, kiba, and shino that i reread constantly because it just. is. so. fucking. GOOD. and they posted a new one that i’m YELLING about.

@eggtoasties okay they only have 2 in the naruto fandom (one shisaku which is still ongoing) BUT THEIR WRITING STYLE IS SO NICE?? I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT. I still go back and reread their shikasaku one cause UGH i can’t get enough. I love it.

10. What’s your favorite fandom, pairing, or character to read fic for?

Fandoms: Naruto, Soul Eater, The Old Guard, ATLA

Parings: KakaSaku/ShikaSaku/ShiSaku/MultiSaku, SoMa, Joe X Nicky, Zukka

Character: SAKURA. I will read anything with Sakura as the main character and her being a fuckin badass or becoming a badass. I love her.

17. How obsessively do you sit and stare at your fic after you’ve just posted and wait for feedback?

aha.. haha.. well. I check my email like three times an hour. its the first thing i check in the mornings too. I’m literally a whore for praise and literally eat up feedback like its going out of style. I also reread a lot of my stuff because i make so many mistakes and spelling errors, or the spacing is weird oR SOMETHING. plus, literally any and all comments make my day, i go back and reread them cause they just make me feel so tingly and warm like “wow. this person enjoyed the fic/my writing enough to tell me. thats HUGE!”

23. What’s your absolute favorite trope to write?

Angry, feral, bloodied, morally gray women. They aren’t bad guys, they’re probably the good guy, but that doesn’t mean they cant be fucking raging at the world with raw knuckles and blood on their teeth. I just love an angry woman who struggles with her emotions and just has so much inner conflict but that doesn’t take away from her character or badassery, it adds to it.

24. What’s a trope that you’d like to never hear about as long as you live, let alone write?

The fake dating or miscommunication troupe. LIKE GUYS JUST TALK. AND TELL EACH OTHER OMFG. the entire like obliviousness of “nah they dont like me” while the They holds their hand and kisses their cheek. MOFO WHAT. it makes me so impatient and like mad HAAHHAHA. its probably because i’m a pretty confrontational person so seeing stuff like that just “cmon bro, USE YO HEAD.”

28. How do you deal with writing pressure (ie: pressure to update, negative comments, deadlines, etc)?

I have yet to receive a negative comment! Which i was really surprised about tbh. As for deadlines or pressure to update, i just kind of do whatever. I do set goals, but i set them flexible enough that hey, if i can’t do it, that’s okay.

I have a lot of mini goals, like “i want to write this chapter and get it done this week” and then the large goal is “FINISH BY END OF MAY” so i have time.

Actually, now that I think on it, the entire pressure to update thing is probably why i’m waiting until I have all of OL&W written to post it weekly,, cause well. I wouldn’t wanna leave you guys waiting as I tried to write and work out the next chapters and stuff, you know?

30. Post a snippet from your current WIP without context - no more than 300 words.

AAAAAA YOU KNOW I LOVE THESE AHAHAHAH

Have you seen the way the dead dance, World Breaker? They roar, half mad and starving. Do you not wish, do you not hope to see them twist and bend and dance to your will?

Shikamaru snarls, looking behind his shoulders to where his Shadows lay. “Patience.” He spits. “Is of the essence, Things of Ancient. Know your place as the dark you are.”

34. How much of yourself and your life experiences do you put into your writing? What do you think your readers’ image of you is?

None of my experiences match up to anything I write tbh,,, probably the only thing that is me in my writing is maybe the emotional turmoil? I’m pretty emotionally and mentally mature because from a pretty young age i started forming my own opinions, started looking into the world around us and being like “dude what the fuck this is not what disney advertised”. Then i started talking (read: arguing and debating) with my dad about a lot of it. So, like emotions are kind of hard for me. Like i’m pretty good at controlling them or understanding them, but still. idk its hard to explain ig.

Like the weight of stress, the anger, the sadness. It’s kind of therapeutic to write. Cause i don’t know how to put those feelings to verbal words so writing them really helps.

As for my readers’ image? Probably like some kind of hunched over figure typing away in the dark with a maniacal grin on their face. I honestly don’t know AHHAHAHA but it is fun to think about. I think they’d see me as someone with potential but a lot of room to grow and someone who is imperfect but in a charming way LMAOOOO

38. What does your writing process look like? How chaotic is it on a scale of 1 (very tame) to 10 (you can’t handle this kind of chaos)?

I’m gonna be real honest. Its probably like a 2. I’m a bit of a control freak so I almost always go in chronological order, my writing is pretty linear. Unless, i get bored and jump to one of my fav parts. It's pretty much i sit down, i open the doc, read over my notes and just start writing.

It’s a little boring to explain AHAHAHA but once i get into the groove of things its really fucking great, I can like feel myself in the world, I can feel what i want the characters to, i love it. I catch myself mouthing the words as i type too, which i find hilarious.

39. What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

I rather like how raw my writing is sometimes. Which might sound really vain, but i do like the way i word things or describe things. I love juxtaposition and repetition, or making a good ole circle back to some minute detail that wouldn’t stand out until i repeat it at the end and you’re like “omg” AHAHAHAHA.

Like those little poetic snippets or certain wording i just sit back and go “damn thats kinda good nadia! go you!’ HAHAHA

40. How did you come up with the idea for The Intimacy Of Being Understood?

AAAAA this fic is like my first child, my pride and joy LMAO

so the idea initially came when i was reading some fic, idk if it was even naruto, but i was like “i don't like this, but i do like the rain symbolism.” And I knew i wanted to write something kind of slow paced, something a little sad and angsty, but would show KakaSaku slowly but surely falling in love.

Idk if you’ve noticed but a lot of my fics, the pairings don’t change each other dramatically. They accept each other as they are and then they grow with together. Like that acceptance is something i just love writing, its so subtle, it isn’t something you declare. Its simply “I am going to love you. I am going to love you despite your flaws and faults. I am going to love you unconditionally because I know you, I understand you, and there is nothing you could do to drive me away.”

The fic kind of wrote itself after that first scene. I kept going back to the rain, go being ghosts, and resurrection, and the small epiphanies one gets. I wanted to focus on each character’s growth with each other. They didn’t find light in life because of each other, but with each other. And i think that’s my favorite thing about that fic.

I wanted something raw and real and just something beautiful. I’m actually really proud of it tbh. Would i go back and rewrite/edit it? Oh of course! I’d do that with every single one of my fics, but i’m not gonna cause i think its in its rawest form right now. :))))

ask me shit plz

#silly things from silly friends

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crystallos-sol · 4 years ago

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Hey have another meta on Gray & Natsu because I don't think I went deep enough.

Gray is traumatized and can't even voice his emotions sometimes. Natsu understands him WITHOUT any issues even during this time.

Don't believe me? Here look at this:

Natsu knows Gray just basically said:

" I care about you please take care of yourself "

I'm so emotional about these two because they are great and they understand each other on a deeper wavelength than I have ever seen within Fairy Tail.

I'll throw in multiple examples for you to compare but please come up with your own. Rewatch the show or Read the manga if you want to, there's so many examples that I cannot fit into one post so I have to suffer with a few. (Not including Happy has I think it's best to put people that aren't his kid,,,,)

First up: Lisanna.

I'm not hating on the ship at all. I'm picking people CLOSEST to Natsu & Gray. And she was essentially close to Natsu before her death. They raised Happy together and had a secret hideout for fucks sake.

Lisanna has I recall from the episodes we had of her, was close with Natsu. But something changed. Because her death hurt Natsu and changed him into a different person. That's clear to see. But her death drove a wedge between them and changed the entire relationship for good.

Lisanna was Natsu's friend, back before her death but however I believe that we do not know much of her outside of her death and how it affected Fairy Tail. We also do know about her Family and how it hurt them. But not about Lisanna, from what we can gather from the many episodes of Fairy Tail she is kind hearted and genuinely loves her family and doesn't want to lose them again. (Her reactions to her siblings being thrown into danger.)

But again her death drove fear and grief into Natsu and that's why him and Lisanna aren't exactly close anymore, because Natsu runs from his feelings. It's also hard to talk to someone you haven't seen since you where a teenager.

Up next who is/was close with Gray: Erza. We know Gray ran after her and helped to fix her tears, even making a child's promise about it. We also know, Gray was Erza's first real friend. Gray has a child was close with Erza in that regard. I do believe Erza shoved him away like she does with everything in response to what happened to her. (But that's a post for another time.)

Gray is still close with Erza, but due to Erza never feeling as if she can stop being Titania he is not as close to her as he is Natsu.

Lucy, who is one of Natsu's best friends, is actually close with Natsu. But unlike with Gray Natsu usually is (Ignoring Mashima's horrible writting between for now because that's a WHOLE OTHER issue) saving her or protecting her. At least it was like that until recently when Lucy finally got the character development and upgrade she deserves.

Lucy is close to Natsu but Natsu also doesn't want to lean on her. Yes you can qoute multiple instances and scenes where it appears he is leaning on her. But however with this you have to take into account the period of time Natsu has known her. The trust issues Natsu already has and previous trauma he has gotten and even new trauma!

Now it gets worse because this is dipping a little into Mashima's terrible characterization and understanding of how people function and feel. Especially women. Take Lisanna and Lucy, if you think about it they are essentially the same fucking character. Both are kind, stubborn, where hurt by someone they love, left their home behind for a number of years, painted has a badass while also simultaneously being soft and delicate.

Sound familar?

Because that's basically the Mashima guide to write a female character. Now what really gets me is the final thing that really cements it. They both have been/are in the supporting role for Natsu. Don't you dare go saying: But Lucy is the main character!

You, like the rest of is because Mashima wrote her like shit, didn't even know that until the interview or you saw that Fairy Tail fact post. The majority of us thought it was Natsu. Because in reality Mashima did NOT start writting her like a main character. He did not give her the good motivation every single damn Fairy Tail Character has.

Lucy & Lisanna have the same number of things that make up their characterization, and yes so do a number of Fairy Tail characters. But that's not the point. The point is that Lucy reminds Natsu of Lisanna in some ways and Natsu cannot bring himself to trust and lean on her fully like he can with Gray. It is not an attack on Nalu. Nalu is a fine ship if only written correctly (aka: Not Mashima's Version Which Is Horrible And Toxic But That's Another Meta For Another Time.).

This is a post about how Gray and Natsu are close. That's it. Natsu cannot bring himself to fully trust Lucy and lean on her comfortably without 1) forcing himself, 2) it happening outside of his control because of past trauma which by the way knowing Natsu he did not do anything about it and most likely bottled it up.

Wow that was a long session on Lucy but in summary: Natsu is traumatized and is not mentally healthy like the entirety of the Guild.

Now, the last one, which I'm sure you can GUESS. It's Juvia. Because some people think that Gray and Juvia are the " closest people! " And " he doesn't let anyone really touch him other than her! "

1) Bullshit. And 2) Bullshit. Here's why:

Juvia is a toxic character who stalks and uncomfortably idolizes Gray to the point it's fucking ridiculous. There are multiple scenes of her following (stalking) Gray around and being jealous of Lucy. Even declaring her a " Love Rival ".

This is probably because: Gray was the first person that was decent to her. (She was bullied for who knows how long and involved in a toxic guild + an abusive relationship.) Before you say shit about Gajeel: He's not nice. Gajeel before all of this, was an asshole, now he is nice which is pretty cool and a great character development. Back then? He was not nice.

Which brings me to Gray. Who even is okay with being stalked, being grabbed randomly and having someone so obsessed with you they made fucking dolls of you? No one. Before you argue: But he doesn't pull away from her!

Gray is most likely touch starved. Considering his entire background and general tendency to not receive hugs or any sort of affection usually. My evidence for this? Myself. I am touch starved and I often react bad to touches from strangers or creepy people but I also have a late reaction time. Because my body is saying: Oh touch???? And my brain is screaming: No.

He also could be trying to be decent. Which is all he did in the first place. He could be trying to not hurt her feelings and yes you could say he hurt Mira's feelings when he called her stupid for betting on Natsu but he also was apologising and panicky because he didn't want to hurt her.

Also if I even have to explain further why being stalked and basically turned into a fetish and an object is a bad thing then clearly something is fucking wrong with you.

Gray however feels safe likely with Natsu, who's been there from the beginning, took on Deliora, fought too many people just because one of his friends are in danger, has repeatedly stopped Gray from using Iced Shell and was ready to Die with him.

Natsu in return probably feels safe and like he can trust Gray to handle himself because this man has been there since day one and even can take Natsu himself on with no problem. Natsu also probably is happy Gray is nothing like Lisanna or Lucy. Because Gray is Gray and he doesn't remind Natsu of anything traumatizing he's been through.

They both trust one another and stay by one another's side because they are both understanding that they aren't gonna leave. Because think about it, Gray has lost family and his mentor to death. He has suffered through that. You wanna know who's constantly beating death on its ass???? Natsu " I refuse to die " Dragneel.

Natsu has lost family by being abandoned and by Death. He got it both ways and he's suffering because of it. But Gray who's stubborn has shit and stood death in the face at a young age and screamed fuck you at the top of his lungs, wouldn't leave. Gray who fucking went through hell and back, destoryed his own infiltration mission just because Natsu Dragneel rolled up, Keeps Trying To Protect Him, Never once wants to lose Natsu. And Natsu knows that. Because Gray is his constant. Gray is that constant presence in his life he knows for a fact he can trust.

But idfk that's just my thoughts on them.

#fairy tail #ft #natsu dragneel #ft gray fullbuster #gray fullbuster #ft natsu dragneel #ft natsu #ft gray #also i guess this could be viewed has:#Gratsu #natray #because technically it does sound gay but it focuses more on them and relationships has a whole #not tagging example relationships or characters because its not the main focus

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golbrocklovely · 4 years ago

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the chosen daughter // colby brock - chapter fifteen

A/N: first off, i just wanna say i’m sorry for this taking so long. i’ve just been really busy with work and also i haven’t been feeling motivated to get it done. but hopefully the length of this makes up for how long i haven’t update haha anyway, thank you for all the continued love on this story. i appreciate you all so much. please lmk what you think and enjoy !!

story description

taglist: @far-to-many-bands , @idfk-tbh-oops , @muted-mayham , @ughwhyislifesohard , @justtanerd , @ashyoungxblood , @cmburgos

trigger warning: slight gore, vampire powers, control/manipulation, cursing, drinking, club scene, brief mentions of fighting

word count: 4043

~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the past three days, the Trapp Haus has been at full capacity; both the club and the apartment. Ever since news of Rinaldi being in town, everyone has been trying to remain close to home base, not wanting to go out. However, other vampires are living it up, unbeknownst to them an elder was stalking the streets.

Personally, I didn't mind being stuck in the Trapp Haus, now that me and Colby were... a thing? I'm not entirely sure what we are, since we've literally only been together for four days, but I will happily keep this thing going if it means I get to make out with him anytime I want to.

And trust me, I do.

Colby has also made it impossible for me to leave, and if I really have to go anywhere, he is next to me the whole time. He's over-protective, but I would be too if an elder that literally massacred his own kind was in L.A.

Mike and Kevin told us it was silent from their sources, no one had seen Rinaldi out yet. Apparently, he had done something like this before. He came to L.A. five years ago and stayed for a while, coming to Bloody and buying at the whole VIP section just so he could watch the club. It was strange to say the least, but Mike and Kevin were confident that he was going to do that again. Everyone was hopeful that he was staying far away from the Trapp Haus.

But then, Kevin got the call.

"Rinaldi wants to buy out our whole VIP section." Kevin gulped.

Mike hissed. "Fuck, he's coming here."

When we found out, it was determined that Sam, Jake, and I would stay in the apartment, since humans were not allowed to be in the Trapp Haus the night Rinaldi was coming. However, last minute, Rinaldi called and stated that humans were allowed to be in the club, and he mentioned to invite all of Kevin's friends because he wanted to meet them.

So, the plan changed.

Kevin told us that he sectioned a small area off for us behind the stage where the DJ booth was, that way we could stay out of view from Rinaldi. Kevin had planned to tend to Rinaldi's needs the whole night while we all stayed in the club.

And that's where we were now: all awkwardly squished behind the stage, sipping drinks and remaining weirdly quiet. Colby kept me close, both of his arms around me as I sat on his lap. If I wanted to stand, he would press me against him, his grip tight. His faced remained tense, almost like he was focusing on something. His mouth was in a permanent frown, his eyes remaining forward.

"You know if you keep scrunching your face like that, you're gonna get wrinkles." I joked, my mouth against his ear.

"Maybe I won't look like a twelve-year-old then." Colby monotoned.

I snickered. “You don't have to hold me the whole time Rinaldi is here.”

“Yes, I do. You have a knack for getting yourself into dangerous situations, and he is a major one.” Colby pressed his lips to the hollow of my neck. “And besides, I like having you close to me.”

Kevin swung around the corner hastily, almost scaring me. "Mike, Colby, can you guys help me get rid of some vamps real quick?"

"Why? What's happening?" Colby questioned.

“...Rinaldi... asked for some of the rowdier vampires to be forced out. He said they're ruining his night.” Kevin explained.

Mike shrugged, standing up. “Well, anything is better than sitting back here.”

“Can't you get security to just do it?” Colby remarked.

“I am, but I need you two as well.” Kevin mentioned.

“Colby, it will only be like five minutes. I promise I won't leave. I'll stay right back here.” I admitted, bringing his attention to me.

Mike groaned. “C'mon man. Stop being so whipped, you've literally been together for like two days.”

“Shut the fuck up, Mike.” Colby snapped.

“Colby, I'll be fine.” I muttered softly.

Colby paused, sighing deeply. Then he slid me off his lap. He tapped Tara’s shoulder. "Watch her, please."

Tara agreed. “Of course, Colbster.”

They all left quickly, not saying another word.

“So... you and Colby are together?” Tara asked slyly.

“Yeah we are.” I affirmed.

Tara’s eyes sparkled mischievously. “I told you it would happen.”

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah you did.”

Jake pulled Tara back into their conversation, her body turning away from me. Suddenly, a loud group of voices came near us, one of the voices being Colby's. I jumped up from my seat, peaking around the corner to look. Colby, Mike, and two bodyguards were yelling at three different vampires, shoving them across the dancefloor and to the exit, the vampires fighting along the way. I followed Colby's body until I couldn't see him through the thick crowd of people. My eyes then traveled up to the VIP section, glancing around at the area that overlooked the whole club.

First, I found Kevin, nervously smiling at someone next to him and pointing at the forced-out vampires. And finally, my eyes landed on him... Rinaldi.

Dark hair... pale blue eyes...

I know him.

And the moment I recognized him; his eyes landed on mine. Once he realized who I was, he smirked lightly.

Someone yanked me from around the corner, shoving me back into my seat. I gazed up at Tara, who's brow furrowed. "What are you doing?"

“Nothing. I wanted to see who Colby was yelling at.” I replied.

“You heard what your boytoy said, stay back here.” Tara sassed.

I nodded begrudgingly, taking a sip of my drink. Colby and Mike came back a minute later, smiling as they came around the corner

“Why are you so happy?” Kat called.

Colby ran his fingers through his hair lazily. “Because I got to punch a vampire for getting in my face.”

“And honestly, any form of action right now is better than… this.” Mike frowned.

Kevin appeared again, coming up to Colby and whispering in his ear. Colby's smile dropped immediately, his jaw tightening. His eyes changed to crimson for a split second when Kevin pulled away. Colby grunted deeply. "What?"

“What's wrong?” Sam queried.

“Rinaldi wants to see... Jade.” Kevin fretted.

My heart sank for a moment as everyone's eyes landed on me.

“What's he wanna see her for?” Mike scoffed.

Kevin related. “He didn't say. All he said was that he wanted to see the human girl behind the stage.”

“Can't we just send some other human up there?” Colby barked.

Sam warned. “Colby.”

Kevin shook his head. “No. He knows what she looks likes.”

“I'm taking her up there.” Colby commanded.

“Well, keep your cool then. Don't need him to decapitate you over some girl.” Mike deadpanned.

“Mike, I mean this whole-heartedly: fuck off.” Colby snarled, glaring.

Colby grabbed my hand, took me from behind the stage, and slowly walked me towards the stairs that led to the VIP section. I leaned into Colby and yelled, "I've met him before!"

“What?” He exclaimed, stopping his movements.

I confessed. “He came to Vampiro about a week ago. He was the man that I talked to.”

“So that's why he wants to see you... Does he know about your powers?” He continued moving through the crowd to the stairs.

“No. I don't think so. I never told him, obviously.” I answered.

As we got to the stairs, Colby lowered his voice. “Okay. Just keep a low profile around him, alright? If he senses for even a millisecond that you're... you, he could easily kill you.”

“I know. This isn't my first time dealing with a vampire.” I teased sarcastically.

Colby stopped us again, his voice harsh. “I'm being serious, Jade. I don't want you to get hurt. I can't have that happen.”

I assured, rubbing his arm tenderly. “It won't, Colby. I'll be okay.”

We finally made it up the stairs of the VIP section, slowly walking over to Rinaldi. He sat comfortably in his booth, sipping his drink haphazardly.

Once his eyes landed on us, he smiled at me. “Long time no see, princess.”

Colby's grip on my hand tightened, making me almost wince. “Hi... Rinaldi.”

“So, you know my name. That's good. What's not good is the fact that I don't know yours.” He commented.

Colby interjected. “Her name is Jade. And I'm Colby.”

“Nice to meet the both of you. If you don't mind, I would like to catch up with Jade.” Rinaldi stared at Colby fiercely. “Alone.”

“I don't think that would be good... What if you or her need something?” Colby argued politely.

Rinaldi sneered. “Well, I'll just wave down to Kevin and he'll be able to get it for me.”

Colby hummed, annoyed. “I'm not sure that would be best.”

“Oh, but I think it is.” A dark crimson aura appeared around Colby suddenly as Rinaldi spoke. "Leave."

I glanced between the two of them, trying not to gasp as I saw Colby achingly let go of my hand. It was like he was forcing himself to stay, but his body had a different plan. He bit his lip as he tried to keep his feet from moving, grabbing onto another booth next to us to keep himself still. But his fighting was useless, his feet forcing him to walk away and down the stairs. He stared up at me nervously, like he couldn't control what he was doing.

Rinaldi's powers were strong enough to make a vampire do as he wanted...

I'm fucked.

“Sorry about that. I don't usually like to use my powers on my own kind, but sometimes we can be just so fucking persistent.” He laughed.

I giggled awkwardly, glancing away from him.

“You can sit down if you want. I'm not gonna bite.” He almost taunted, sweetly.

I nodded my head, sitting down at the end of the booth, my legs feeling like jello.

My mouth moved before I could think. “What are you doing here, if you don't mind me asking?”

He placed his glass down, lounging back against the booth. “I'm just here to have a good time, which has rarely happened in the 500 years I've been a vampire. Plus, I'm here in L.A. because I heard a rumor that I want cleared up.”

“What rumor?” I puzzled.

“You'll find out later.” His eyes glimmered as he grinned playfully. “So... is that the boy you were thinking about a couple days ago when we first talked?”

I swallowed. “Uh... yeah, he is.”

“Are you two together?” Rinaldi speculated.

I fidgeted with my rings, keeping my eyes to the floor. “It's, um, complicated. And new.”

“Well, I'm happy to hear you got what you wanted. Unforbidden love usually never comes true.” His voice falling to an utter.

“Did you come here because you knew I was here?” I blurted out.

“That's a little arrogant of you, don't you think?” Rinaldi smirked.

I stayed silent, not sure how to respond.

He chuckled. “I'm kidding. But, no; I didn't come here for you. I actually didn't know you were here. And then when you peaked around the corner from the DJ booth, I realized why this whole place smelled so delicious.”

I exhaled, nodding my head again. I was petrified to speak, unable to form a sentence.

“So... how did you meet that Colby fella?” He inquired.

“He-he saved me, one night after work. I was harassed by a vampire and... he killed him.” I sputtered.

“Interesting. I swear I heard something like that,” He shrugged nonchalantly. “And I can see why you were attacked. A beautiful girl with appetizing blood? That's a vampire's wet dream...”

I gulped, my hands beginning to shake. My nerves felt like they were going to bubble over and make me sick.

He cleared his throat suddenly, lightly sliding closer to me. “Jade, I apologize. That was rude of me to say. I can tell I'm making you nervous. And I don't want that. Honestly, I just want to talk to you. You're one of the first humans to not throw yourself at me or be rude to me because of what I am. I'm just used to saying inappropriate things to shock people, so I'm sorry if what I said made you upset. That wasn't my intention.”

I took a deep breath and finally looked him in the eyes. “Okay, I accept your apology.”

“Good. I appreciate that.” He sat back again, “It's been a long time since I've been close to anyone that wasn't family, so I'm not good at talking to strangers.”

“When was your last relationship?” I asked.

Rinaldi huffed. “Oh God... my last 'relationship', if you could call it that, was a couple months back. But I've only ever had one serious romance, and that was back when I was a human.”

“Really?” I awed.

“Yeah. Something like what you and Colby have is unheard of in my life.” He responded, crossing his arms.

“Me and Colby aren't that close.” I squeaked, feeling myself blush.

He shook his head. “I beg to differ. Not many vampires fight against my powers, or almost succeed. I can tell he cares about you deeply.”

“Your romance... what was her name?” I whispered.

“Elenora, or I called her El.” He divulged, smiling at the memory.

“What happened to her?” I queried.

He sighed sadly. “...She was forced into exile, in a way. Forced to run and leave me behind. I assume she died very young. I haven't felt what I felt for her since.”

“I'm sorry to hear that.” I interrupted.

He gazed over at me; an eyebrow raised cautiously.

“I can't even imagine the pain of not feeling love for hundreds and hundreds of years. I'm sorry you never felt that way again, and that you lost the love of your life.” I conceded.

Rinaldi's eyes softened genuinely for the first time. He almost looked surprised at what I said.

He almost looked… human.

He glanced away for a moment and took a swig of his drink. Once he finished, he smiled.

“Do you wanna know a secret? Something I've never told a human before?” He suggested.

“Sure...” I murmured.

“My real name is not Rinaldi.” He disclosed.

I raised my eyebrows. “Oh?”

“Well, technically it is, it's my last name. Or at least the last name I created for myself. It's based off of my father's first name, Reinald.” He revealed, “My actual name is Dillon.”

“Well, it's nice to meet you, Dillon.” I greeted, half-smiling.

He hummed, smirking. “And it was nice meeting you, Jade.”

He stood up quickly and went over to the railing that faced the rest of the club. I got up and followed him, confused as to what was happening. I followed his eyes, staring deeply at the DJ. The DJ suddenly made eye contact with Rinaldi, and a scarlet aura appeared around him. Rinaldi mouthed something and abruptly the music turned off. The crowd came to a halt, all glancing around.

He clapped, catching people’s attention. “Now, I just want to say thank you all for coming out and entertaining me for the night. I appreciate it immensely. But now, it's time for you to leave.”

Everyone in the club stood still, staring up at Rinaldi.

“Leave. NOW!” He boomed, his deep voice echoing off the walls.

The crowd jumped back at his voice, scrambling to leave. Security helped force people out, as Rinaldi bit his lip and turned to me.

“At least that time I didn't have to use my powers,” He joked. “C'mon downstairs with me.”

I nodded sheepishly, following Rinaldi as he strutted down the stairs. All my friends had stayed, helping to get people out quickly. Then when Rinaldi got to the bottom of the stairs, we all met up in the middle of the dance floor.

I paced over to Colby, embracing him tightly as I breathed a sigh of relief.

“Are you okay? Did he do anything to you?” He gasped, mumbling into my hair.

I gripped Colby firmly, finally relaxing. “I'm okay. He didn't do anything.”

Rinaldi’s voice made me pull away from Colby. “Wow, Kevin. You really do know how to throw a party. I'll have to come back here sometime.”

Kevin snickered confidently. “Of course, Rinaldi. We always appreciate elders stopping through.”

“Oh, but I will say there is one downside to this night.” He pointed out, raising a finger sarcastically.

“What? Did Jade do something?” Kevin quipped.

“No, she was fine. But I think you forgot to mention that there was a secret club in here.” Rinaldi stated calmly.

I could feel Colby's body stiffen against mine. Everyone reacted the same; muscles tightening, and stances fixed.

Kevin stuttered. “Wh-what do you mean?”

“I could have sworn I heard something about vampires hunting other vampires. But... that's illegal in California. And I know you're not doing anything illegal here... right?” Rinaldi cocked his head to the side.

“Of course not. I-I'm not entirely sure where you would have heard that from, but it's not true.” Kevin stammered, voice faltering.

Rinaldi crossed his arms. “Are you sure? Because I have a very reliable source. He's actually here right now.”

The entrance behind us slammed open, a familiar face stepping through, smirking at all of us as we turned to him.

Caleb.

“Oh my God, I'm gonna kill him.” Mike fumed quietly.

“I don't think you should do that, Mike. You don't want to piss off an elder now.” Caleb jeered, striding to Rinaldi and standing next to him.

“Caleb... how could you rat us out? After everything we have done for you!” Sam shouted.

Caleb scoffed. “Oh, you mean like poisoning me and making me forget a whole night happened?!”

I could hear Colby growl lowly, his hands clenching into a fist.

“Caleb, please tell me what you know about this group.” Rinaldi spoke.

“Well for starters they're called XPLR, which is the dumbest name by the way. And they, with the help of those two douchey humans, kill vampires. They hunt and torture them for information on other 'bad' vampires. Plus, they have the Angelica flower and they gave it to me to knock me out and make me forget.” Caleb accused.

“And how would you know if you forgot?” Colby retorted.

“I'm not fucking stupid, asshole. I know what happened to me… kind of,” Caleb grumbled. “Plus, something is off about that girl.”

My breath hitched in my throat. Colby slid in front of me, protecting me. “What are you going on about now, Caleb?”

“I heard you guys talking about her 'abilities', whatever that means. And I know one of you said that your powers don't work on her, so obviously she's not human.” Caleb declared angrily.

Rinaldi stared at Caleb, unfazed. “This is news to me.”

“She's probably a witch or something.” Caleb muttered.

Rinaldi turned his head slowly towards me. “Jade, could you come here for a second?”

“No. She can't.” Colby shook, rage filling his voice and body.

“Don't make this more difficult than it already is,” Rinaldi insisted. “I'm not gonna hurt her, but I will hurt you.”

“Colby, it's okay.” I whimpered; my breath ragged.

Colby closed his eyes tightly, moving slightly over to allow me to pass him. I trudged over to Rinaldi, stopping in front of him.

“I know this is a terrible situation to put you through, but I need to know if you have powers or not.” Rinaldi explained.

“Okay...” I mumbled.

“I'm gonna use my powers on you to do something you wouldn't do.” He informed.

“And what is that?” I questioned.

“I want you to kiss me.” He stated.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Colby jerk, ready to pounce. Mike stopped him with an arm.

Rinaldi pointed to Colby, keeping his eyes on me. “See, that reaction is why I have to do it. I know for a fact she wouldn't want to kiss me because she's with you. It's the only way, I'm afraid.”

Rinaldi gently grabbed my hands, making me look into his eyes.

And I realized something in that moment. He had never used his powers on me. And he was the strongest vampire I'd ever encountered.

What if his powers work on me? What if I end up kissing him?

I don't want that. I don't want to hurt Colby. But I don't want to die either.

Fuck.

"Kiss me, Jade." A ruby aura appeared around us; I could feel his power surge through me. I could see what he wanted me to do, but I felt no urge to do it. Then an idea hit me.

I leaned forward, having to stretch upwards to meet his face. I slowly eased my lips towards him and planted them sweetly on his cheek, pulling away a second later.

Once I landed back on my feet, his aura had disappeared. I could see everyone around us was shocked, frozen. No one moved even an inch.

He looked down at me curiously. I peered into his eyes confidently.

“You never said where.”

Rinaldi grinned, letting out a soft laugh. His hands let go of mine as he shook his head. “That... is very true.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? Rinaldi, you have to see she is lying!” Caleb shrieked, gasping.

“Caleb. Listen to me,” Rinaldi cautioned. “I appreciate you coming to me and letting me know about all of this. But it's obvious she is not a witch otherwise she wouldn't have kissed me.”

“But something is off about her! I just know it!” Caleb shrilled, glaring daggers.

“Enough, Caleb. I want you to apologize to her.” Rinaldi demanded.

Caleb objected as his eyes widened. “What?!”

“Apologize to her, right now. Accusing a lady of something wrongful deserves an apology.” Rinaldi scolded.

Caleb rolled his eyes quickly, stepping up to me and looking me in the eyes. “I'm sorry I accused you.”

“Thank you... for your service, Caleb.” Rinaldi announced, placing a hand on Caleb's shoulder.

Then within a flash, Rinaldi smashed both of his hands onto either side of Caleb's head, gripping his skull dangerously, and ripping it clean off his body before he could even make a noise.

I felt blood splatter onto my face, my mouth opening as a loud gasp escaped my throat. Everyone stepped back, shocked in horror at Caleb's headless body laid on the ground. Rinaldi flung Caleb's head behind him, it rolling away after bouncing once.

Rinaldi lightly wiped his hands on his pants, blood smearing onto his all black outfit. “Thank God that's over. He was very, very annoying.”

I held back vomit as I kept my eyes on Rinaldi, not wanting to see Caleb's corpse on the ground.

Rinaldi faced Kevin casually. “Sorry I had to dirty up your floor, Kevin. I hope you know how to deal with a dead body.”

“Yeah... it's no problem, Rinaldi.” Kevin remained still.

“Also, I apologize for having to do all of that,” Rinaldi motioned to Caleb’s body. “Caleb was making such a big deal about XPLR that I just had to come out and see what it was all about. I personally don't care that you guys hunt other vampires. I know you're only getting rid of the ones that are fucking it up for the rest of us. So, keep doing what you're doing. Just maybe be a bit quiet about it, okay?”

Mike concluded. “Sounds good.”

“I mean, who would I be to judge those that have killed vampires?” Rinaldi whipped his head to Tara, smiling politely, “Right, Tara?”

“Burn in hell, Dillon.” Tara seethed.

“Always as chipper as ever. Well, that this has been eventful, but I think it's time for me to head out.” Rinaldi bowed to Kevin, clasping his hands together. “Thank you for such a fabulous time, Kevin. Your club is fantastic.”

Kevin followed suit cautiously. “Thank you. Have a good night, Rinaldi.”

He turned to me quickly, a cheery smile on his face. “I'll see you around, princess.”

Then with a wink, he was gone in a flash.

<< CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 16 >>

#colby brock #colby brock fanfiction #colby brock fanfic #colby brock fic #colby brock vampire #vampire #colby brock story #colby brock angst #the chosen daughter #colby brock x oc

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katzirra · 4 years ago

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MINA UPDATE; MINA HAS BEEN TO FOUR VETS IN 72 HOURS.

First vet was the ER vet. Found she was dehydrated and put her on fluids and because of three other things said she was stage 3 kidney disease. Kicked me out at 7:30 am to go to my vet across the road.

Second vet, my shitty vet who didn't tell me at her UTI visit nine months ago to keep an eye on her kidneys because she's old; basically left her to do her fluids ans SUPPOSEDLY rechecked her at 5:30pm qnd in short told me she wasn't gonna make it for another 24-48 hours. Shitty bedside manners, honestly. Said she was too far gone to do much for her poor kidneys.

Didn't like those bullshit answers. Got her home and noticed her vision going which is STRANGE. That doesn't happen SUDDENLY... So at 9am we took her to my sister's vet who ran her blood and saw her kidneys were hella better than we were told. Also told she's way healthier than we were told. Vet told me she suspected hypertension because some things but unfortunately no way to measure her blood pressure there. Gave me meds, insisted we try to do the sub fluids for a week and see if she evens out ans THEN look into if we need to out her down. Overall just way more positive.

Mina was walking around, climbing in her box, keeping fluids and food down what we gave her. TRYING to find her box qnd use it. I woke up today to her having g blood on her iris, and freaked out.

So my sister came to catsit today, got food and water in her, monitored her, kept her warm and called some friends - one of whom is an Amish horse vet who had a cat with hypertension. Which the eye thing super lead us to believe that's what it was. He told us to just get her checked and go from there.

FOURTH FUCKING VET WAS ANOTHER ER VET. ARGUED WITH ME ABOUT MY PAPERS BEING FAXXED OVER THAT VET NUMBER THREE HAD TWO TECHS FAX AND EMAIL OVER. The told me how WORRIED they were about Mina ans her overall condition, and yet literally would not stop telling me she is probably gonna die. Like the three vets out of the four who told me this can rot in hell honestly. The third vet was the only one who acknowledged my cats age and also commenter on her ACTUAL health and what's poor right now with goos optimism. I'm livid still how the last one was.

After my sister getting pissed, my sisters vet getting pissed, the fucking tech going back over to the building to passive aggressively email the paperwork to them ans angrily calling them and calling me back TWICE finally they got me a prescription for some blood pressure meds. My poor cats blood pressure is 300+. Her poor fuxking head. It took them 2 hours to stop grabbing my dick, when I was telling them she has to have high blood pressure ans please hurry because I'm so fucking scared for her eyes....

SO WE GET HOME, GIVE HER HER MEDS, SHE DRANK FOR HERSELF FOR LIKE TEN MINUTES, PEED LIKE A BASTARD, GOT 100ML OF IV IN HER TO HELP WITH THE DEHYDRATION AND IS SLEEPING LIKE A LITTLE ANGEL NOW.

Things are looking better and even if she only has a week I just wanna know I did my best to make her comfortable and she's not going out in pain, she's going out feeling as close to normal as I can. I want her brain not on fire. I want her to at least be able to see us...

I'm so tired ans last I checked on her, she was at least sleeping and purring... But man. These vets around here. I'm still amazed no one checked her blood pressure ans basically told me on yeah she's gonna die. Like straight up.

More so too is just... Idfk man, like I kept telling my actual vet, vet 2, that my cat has always drank a lot of water, always has dilated pupils, runs cold, is small, is antisocial qnd complacent when handled too much...and he still gave me shit... Juat....I'm never going back there....

She dwink

#kat life #useless secretary

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satendou · 4 years ago

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OKAY OKAY OKAY I KNOW THIS IS SOOOO CLICHE BUT LIKE 😠😠😠 im such a SUCKER for relationships with a deep understanding for e/o and a poly relationship w bokuaka would be just THAT.... like im so INVESTED also omg talk abt ur fav poly pairings bc ive read thru ur entire poly tag and im in love 😞😞😞 suddenly i do want to be in a poly relationship w the hq boys (i am also a rarepair kinda girl so seeing u write about them as poly pairings make my heart go 💗💗💗💗 i luv it so much thank u for ur service)

you saying i have a deep understanding of e/o: what is e/o?

hrnnnngd wjeheveve i loved reading this i was so tempted to just hoard it 🥺

uhhhhh my favorite poly pairings are probably iwaoi, akiwa (iwaka? iwakaashi? anyway i get da point), kuraka, daikuro (daishou not daichi sorry), and whatever the hell the ship name is for semi/shirabu.

iwaoi should be obvious like,,,they have such a strong bond already that it feels like one of the most natural pairings. i don’t have to fight to see how they might interact. i always imagine oikawa acting like a little gremlin just to rile iwa up, and iwa is SO obvious about his feelings for oiks bc he’ll start stumbling over his “shittykawa” insults in fear that oikawa will ✨suddenly✨ be hurt by them.

iwa: i don’t wanna be obvious about it

you mattsun and makki, in the bg, watching him stutter through a painful number of insults for oikawa: sure jan

oikawa, pretending to be oblivious: what was that iwa-chan?

kuraka isn’t quite as fluid to me as boaka would be but i just know that akaashi and kuroo would be the cheekiest, sweetest, dorkiest idiots in a relationship. kuroo enjoys inconveniencing you to the nth degree, and akaashi will sit back and watch it happen. akaashi is a good cook (you can’t change my mind) and makes sure you’re eating correctly, but will get kuroo back for shenanigans by telling him he doesn’t get to eat. also: puns. that’s all.

one of my rarepairs is probably more like a “uniquepair” but whatever. iwakaashi just slammed me in the head with a mallet one day and took hold. akaashi takes a LOT of pride in flustering iwa, but iwa doesn’t realize how easily he flusters akaashi in return, bc he’s too busy being flustered. iwa has an obsession with akaashi’s hands (don’t we all), and akaashi always loses his ability to think when iwa wanders in shirtless (i’m losing my ability to think just thinking about it oop). anyway, the relationship with them isn’t as loud as it would be with kuroo or oiks, but akaashi flourishes by being the trickster in the relationship. in the other i always see him as the more level head just bc kuroo is a bigger goofball.

uhhhh kurodai (daikuroo?) is just,,,like iwakaashi it knocked me out one day. that fuckin relationship is chaotic af. i hate to say it but they probably argue a lot. it always starts out joking, but can and will come down to a “why do you always do this” type of fight. like,,,they don’t find it hard to agree on things specifically but each of them has their own opinion and both want to do it, so neither of them want to back down. so they often devolve into petty arguments bc “nothing they suggest or do is ever right”. theirs is probably the most unstable relationship to me, but they just have to go and learn from a sort of friendship to a relationship. they’ll figure it out and then you’ll have your hands full. sarcasm, stupid puns, romantic surprises all the time. they almost burn the house down once trying to recreate the dish you had on your first date with them at home. charcoal a la city water: yum.

semirabu, shiremi, uhhhh shiremabu idfk they all sound terrible ANYWAY. semi is pretty laid back compared to shirabu, and usually just lets shirabu have his way (within reason of course) bc usually he’s right. shirabu has to learn to curb some of his more acerbic attitude at the beginning of the relationship, bc before where he’d just speak his mind, he now needs tact and boy lemme tell you, he doesn’t have that. another one that’s kinda unstable at the beginning bc shirabu has never had a serious relationship before, so he’s unsure of himself and that makes him even more uneasy, which makes him prone to lashing out more. you and semi need to be patient with him but don’t let him walk all over you either. he figures it out eventually.

this got so long sorry 💀 i just,,,love talking about them man. i don’t think most people like polyships lmao.

#i talked a lot of about the ships themselves but that’s just bc #i always talk about how they’d interact with you #and i rarely talk about the characters interactions with each other #but i love them too so #🌺.iwaoi #🌺.kuraka #🌺.iwakaashi #🌺.daikuro #🌺.shiremabu #just fuckin bc #👻.answers

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