#id say never doing this again but it was actually pretty ok??
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My toxic trait is that I like how my incomplete drawings look better than the finished things
#im sorry i cant be her (my searching lines)#i cant stop thinking about this drawing i have a sinking feeling that im gonna be very unhappy when its done#or. not unhappy. but not as excited as i feel about it now!#i only worked in two short chunks on it but both were pretty productive#i have a feeling that when i take the time to really dedicate myself to it im gonna fuck something up#like i can see areas i need to/can improve already but the glaring flaws are ok! bc it's not finished!#it OVERALL looks cool and LOOKS like it has the potential to turn out well#but will it... WILL IT??? WILL IT EVER?#i have never been so totally completely satisfied w any finished drawing ive dedicated myself to fully.#tales from diana#this is also only the second time ive done a really deliberate self-portrait that wasnt in some for or another. practice#like of course ive drawn my face before. not that often actually. but since yes i do draw. i have drawn myself#i probably should've drawn myself more times for how often i think id like a nice picture of myself#but then again its not gonna be so 'nice' if i make it and am not totally happy w it?#see one of the ppl who inspired me to learn to draw is ned @sneez my dearest. he's spoiled me before#and drawn me very beautifully on several occasions and it's very much a thing to move one's heart#to see someone dedicate their talent to depicting YOU.#and i might say HE has made me look more beautiful in art than i think i'll ever look in the flesh#which is not to say he drew me inaccurately. but he's so talented that his art is more beautiful than life.#and i dont compare myself in skill to him bc he's been doing it for YEARS and way more trained than me in the visual arts.#like it simply wouldn't be fair so i only compare myself to myself. naturally#but i used to think. very VAINLY i might say. that if i could draw like him id draw beautiful pictures of myself all the time#well ce n'est pas ca mon ami. since learning to draw i've found im much more interested in drawing ppl i find beautiful#rather than myself. im not art. not through my own eyes at least.#i should really draw ned sometime. i really should.#actually somewhat embarrasingly i tried to draw him like 5 or 6 years ago. and i NEVER tried to draw then#i did show him tho and he thought it was very impressive but that's probably just bc he loves me. xoxox#maybe ill post that someday as a throwback just for the hell of it. lol. thatd be cute
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post-trimax vash meets stampede wolfwood
[ID: Black and white comic of Vash and Wolfwood of their Stampede versions. The comic starts with Wolfwood continuing off a conversation, saying “I didn’t mean t’say anythin’ bad to her. She just took it the wrong way. But anyway...” Wolfwood speaks with a hand gestured flippantly while Vash, who’s seated next to him, just listens. Vash thinks to himself, “Talks more about himself... Honest expressions... Immature, though he was pretty immature too.” He smiles and continues to think, “And yet...”
A panel of Vash’s eye directed now to the sky. He thinks, “Some things are bound to be the same with us...” He thinks of a memory, the version from Maximum of him and Wolfwood, back shown as they chatted underneath two moons, one moon with a hole through it. Vash continues, “Isn’t that right, W-“ His thoughts are interrupted by Wolfwood coming into a view, a close up his deadpan expression. Vash utters out “-olfwood..?” with a nervous expression. He starts to explain, “Um. Sorry if it seemed like I wasn’t listening, I was! So, let’s keep talking?”
Vash smiles and puts his hands together as he says, “okay?” Wolfwood glares at him with gritted teeth and Vash immediately remembers, “Right, he’s more short-tempered...” He continues to think, “Maybe Plan B works with him—“ before he’s grabbed by his coat collar aggressively and changes thoughts, “OK, never mind, brace for impact..!” But he’s surprised when he’s tugged instead, him and Wolfwood flops against the ground. Wolfwood puts an arm over Vash and says, “I don’t need to be entertained, blondie. If yer tired, we can go to sleep.”
Two close up panels of Wolfwood and Vash’s eyes looking at each other, Wolfwood taking off Vash’s glasses as he says, “Am I wrong?” Vash thinks to himself, “Actually... I was being genuine when I said I wanted to keep talking. I don’t feel tired at all. But, I think you know this body more than I do.”
Vash’s thoughts continue, “I can’t deny the me you’re fond of from being taken care of. And I could never deny your kindness. Even though...” Vash finally smiles and says, “You’re not wrong...” Wolfwood smiles back before tugging Vash closer and says, “Then, let’s sleep.” Vash asks, “Should we get a blanket?” Wolfwood asks, “Why?” before kissing Vash on the cheek, “I’ll keep you warm.” Vash puts his face into both his hands and flushes. Wolfwood smiles cheekily and asks, “What?” Vash responds, “I was caught off guard..” Wolfwood says, “You’ve said worse though.” Vash responds, “Did I...” The panel phases out and the dialogue returns to Vash’s thoughts. He thinks, “I want to stay a bit longer. Talk a bit longer.
You’re tired here too. The future is always going to be unfair to you. I want to protect you from it. I want to hold you close so you won’t go far.” The thoughts overlap the scene of Wolfwood now sleeping peacefully against Vash with an arm over him, Vash’s jacket draped against him as a blanket. Vash looks at him and a small thought bubble thinks, “He can fall asleep first...” His previous thoughts continue, “I know I can’t. I already had that chance.” A close up of Vash putting his hand over Wolfwood’s. He continues, “I wasn’t capable once, I can’t be sure I’d be capable a second time. And in a way...”
Vash’s thoughts continue with the back drop of the sky, Stampede’s sky of two moons without holes, “Some things are bound to be the same. But I know you’ll be loved again and again in a way I’d never know.” A split panel, one half contains the sleeping face of Wolfwood from Stampede, the other of Wolfwood from Trimax. In turn, the Vash lying down looking fondly at Wolfwood shifts to the post Trimax Vash while the other versions, Stampede and earlier Trimax, are faintly drawn next to him doing the same. Vash closes his eyes and finally drifts to sleep as the final text reads, “Goodnight, Wolfwood.”
#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun stampede#trigun maximum#trimax spoilers#was thinking damn havent done the crossovers in awhile. doodled a bunch of fluff crossover stuff and somehow#this is the one i finish dmgkg in the same vein ive been thinking a lot about the time loop au which#i also like but one thing about it that always made me wonder is vash's interference and his willingness to interfere#not to say he's a believer of fate or anything -- im a firm believer that if vash had a chance to do it again knowing what he knew he'd#obviously do things differently -- but not in the i'll solve everything for you way but in the#let's spend less time arguing and be#happier while we still got the time to#trigun universe is always going to be brutal to the both of them <pensive> but anyway to be a little kinder to him i just#let him swap for a day or so with stampede vash... maybe granted the chance to stay but vash would never do that to Himself. and#in the end thats not the wolfwood he knew. no miguel o'hara-ing this#also he nor us know if stamp ww would go thru the same fate :']!#ruporas art#trigun
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I saw chainsaw man was in your fandom list so could I request Denji realizing he’s falling for a guy for the first time? He gives me chaotic bi guy vibes
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Ok so as a chaotic bi guy myself i clocked denji day one- i also decided to do this as hcs because i have so many thoughts- its me, the bisexuality devil lmao
♥︎request are open ♥︎
Cw : slight suggestive bits (chainsaw man lvls),so canon typical levels of nsfw. STILL SFW NO SMUT IN THIS, BI DENJI SUPREMACY, bi panic and maybe a bit of heteronormativity, simping.
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Denji is the poster boy for chaotic bi panic
The thing that most people, especially in the series itself don't realize is that denjis goal isn't just to have sex and touch boobs, it to live a normal life because he has been so deprived of any basics and normality
But denji struggles in realizing that he's in love with a dude, a man, a guy, a homie.
It probably happens because you are genuinely nice to him- my boy has standards so low it trips the devils
At first he thinks your just his best bud, his greatest pal- it's totally normal that he thinks about you so much, that he really likes holding your hand, that he gets excited like a puppy when he knows hes going to see you again
It's perfectly normal how much time he spends in your apartment- like he basically lives there
Power is about to actually kill him if he mentions you one more time she's so sick of it
Never once does it ever cross his mind that he might be into guys too (boobs are boobs tbh)
He is over at your apartment so much that it isn't uncommon for him to just,,,let himself in (you said you don't mind
Denji is already kinda a mess, he's a nervous wreck when it comes to a lot of romance stuff (we love a boy failure) so he's already pretty chaotic even before he realizes that he's absolutely simping for you
But his crush is so obvious its hitting “if s/o was a girl id totally be into him, like smash- like my girlfriend” levels of denial
And he's not fooling anyone
He starts to slowly realize that having dreams about your best friend, and having to continuously correct the dreams so that one of you is the girl, isn't just being close friends
He really panics when he thinks he might be gay- he doesn't really know being bi is an option but is relieved to find that out lmao
He decides to make sure by looking at magazines featuring men, other media etc to make sure you aren't just some glitch- and nope hes bi
“Boobs are boobs” ahh reasoning- genuinely he is not picky lmao (chaos bi)
Despite this he still claims that you are just his best bud, his pal, chum, homie, compadre, friend, home slice etc.
Until the incident
And by that I mean he saw you practically naked- he had let himself into your apartment like normal, honestly he probably planned on casually coming out- not confessing! afterall you were just his friend (delusional)
But as he's sitting in your living room he here's the door open down the hall, when he speaks his head out he's frozen in place because daymn. There you are with wet hair and just a towel around your waist- and denji panics big time- when i say he literally flees your apartment i mean it.
And that was really what he needed, because this starts his downward spiral of realizing that he has indeed fallen for you and has massive crush on you
He realizes that this is honestly one of his first crushes in general because denji struggles with his emotions and figuring out the different types of affection, hell even the lines between romantic attraction and sexual attraction he really struggles
But he (and everyone else) is positive that this isn't just him realizing he is into guys, but that he genuinely wants to do all the normal couple stuff with you
Like yes denjis thoughts can be sexual but the biggest thing he struggles with is that he feels all warm and mushy at the thought of calling you his boyfriend and having a normal relationship.
Power is yalls #1 hater btw, not that she doesnt support you but it's that she is sick of denji just fumbling the bag
She gags whenever he mentions you lmao, watching denji fumble around his thoughts and feelings is painful because he is so awkward
I firmly believe in BI denji supremacy, he is such a bisexual disaster
#chainsaw man#chainsaw man x reader#csm denji#csm x reader#denji x reader#denji x you#csm denji x reader#chainsaw man x you#chainsaw man x y/n#chainsaw man denji#denji csm#x reader#bi denji#x male reader#x male y/n#csm x male reader#denji x male reader
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Adventures of YOUR part time job in the Lookismverse
G/N. You work the graveyard shift in a convenience store. You meet bizarre characters on different nights. Part 1 | Part 2
The customers can usually be separated into 3 categories.
Drunks, students, and weirdos.
Unfortunately for you, lately the weirdos have turned into regulars. But fortunately the weirdos aren't so weird.
The one that made it a habit to check in on you, with the scars and the cheesy wink wasn't so bad. Jack, was it? You can't remember and it's been too long for you to ask. You awkwardly address him as 'you' and avoid any situation where you need to use his name.
He likes to ask how you are, tell a few jokes. Spirit undeterred even when you look at him with a blank face because bless his soul, he's not funny at all but at least he tries and he's a lot less weird than first impression.
He hangs around at odd times, then again you do only work at odd times. Telling you stories about this and that. Something about Big Deal, something about a guy called Sinu and something about another guy called Samuel.
It's difficult to keep track. It's like he wants to talk but he's cryptic and god, it's 4am who can blame you if your eyes are glazing over.
John, or is it Jerry, is waffling again. He seems to always be talking about Samuel. Who he apparently misses and wonders where it's gone wrong and hang on, he's never been explicit but you just had to know.
When he takes a breath to munch on a cookie, you ask, "Hold on, is Samuel your ex?"
Wait no his name is Jason, definitely Jason- freezes mid-chew, "Why would you say that? He's my friend!"
Joshua sprays crumbs all over you but you note how he doesn't say no.
(You think you see this Samuel one early morning. You’re pretty sure you’ve seen him before and man, he really looks like shit.
Looks like the breakup is getting to him too.
Poor Samuel and Poor Jim.)
.
.
But sometimes weirdos are just weirdos.
It's ok. It comes with the territory so long as they're not in the habit of hurling abuse or whatever, you can deal with it.
In recent memory, there's only been two people that you have had to almost chase out with a broomstick.
You should have known they would be weirdos when one of them walks in in surprisingly teeny tiny purple camo shorts. Not that you're a pearl clutcher, but you're worried that one wrong move and he could be dangling out.
Besides. Purple. Camo. Shorts. Those words should never follow one after the other, and you repress a shudder at this guy's hideous dress sense when he comes up to you.
You thought the other one was alright, at least there's no hideous purple camo shorts in sight and his hair is nice (huh, this style must be popular, you’ve seen a lot of guys with this hair)-
But then he opens his mouth and asks for snakes and you think it's karma for judging camo-guy for his appearance when his friend is equally odd.
"We usually keep the snakes next to the ramen," you deadpan and the two men actually go to seek out the supposed snake (meat or pet purposes?) only to return moments later, empty-handed and looking confused.
"I think the snake is all sold out," Non-camo guy says as camo-guy glances around as if you might have hidden your snake stock elsewhere.
They must have thought you were stupid as you stood there opening and closing your mouth like a fish (or maybe a snake, do snake do these things), because come on, how are you even supposed to formulate a response to that?
Then you look at their eyes and also notice them looking snakey and surmise it must be some weird fetish thing. Pretending to be snakes and eating snakes and having pet snakes.
You want no part of this and tell them to get out.
.
.
"I'm Baek Hangyeol," a new face says, pointing to his ID badge pinned to the white coat.
"Doctor Baek Hangyeol." He stresses Doctor and Hangyeol and you wonder if he is waiting for a round of applause.
You don't say anything but you do notice he looks like a teenager and what idiot would let a teenager operate on them. (Drunk, student, weirdo. He could be all three.) Doctor Baek Hangyeol must be bluffing.
You decide not to call him on his bullshit.
"Cool," is all you respond with because you don't want another complaint for being too mouthy. You are half tempted to tell him you're not a doctor, that you just work here but that seemed kinda redundant so you keep your mouth shut.
"Do you believe in true beauty?" he asks when you finish bagging up his goods (a plain water with added minerals, a bottle of multivitamins and a protein shake) and you think what sort of question is that.
You give a halfhearted shrug and say "Sure" and he hands his business card over.
"If you're ever considering it," he tells you with a wild smile. After he has left you look down at the lettering, eyes zeroing in on ‘Plastic Surgery’.
Excuse me?! What is he trying to say?
You thought he was a weirdo but now he has firmly shifted over to asshole. You regret not telling him to go fuck himself while you had the chance. The complaint would 100% be worth it. Zero regrets.
On your break, you burn the card and feel a small sense of satisfaction.
.
.
A tall blonde guy with a creepy vibe (hold on, have you seen him before, he seems familiar. Then again, creepy blonde guys seem to be quite common around here-) walks in with the most billowing coat you have ever seen.
The entrance is kinda cool but the actual coat is kinda tragic with the cheesy red lettering and you wonder if you can pull it off any better than him.
You're still wondering about his coat when he's paying you, and hang on you have definitely seen him before because he says arigatou and hands over yen and you tell him no. Won only.
The idea of the coat, which has evolved into you fantasising about having a full blown cape, quickly loses its charm however, when the blonde gets caught in the automatic doors and you have to wrestle them open to free him.
Afterwards, you ask if he's ok, if he is harmed and can’t resist asking if the coat is ok too. You really don't want a lawsuit on your watch especially when the malfunctioning doors are not your fault.
Your kindness is repaid by him telling you he's not interested (what the fuck) and that his heart will not stray (again, what the fuck).
.
.
You accidentally eavesdrop on a couple of students lamenting about missing out on school work. You didn’t mean to eavesdrop ok, the aisles are tight and cramped, it’s a small space.
You peek over, and the one with big ears (seriously, they are huge) is telling the one with his back to you (goodness, his back is huge too) that school is important and he’s got notes the other one can use.
It’s sweet, you think. School is important and it’s good they recognise that. Nice of them to help each other out too.
When they both come to pay (holy shit, that’s a fuckton of chocolate milk), you’re surprised to find Big Ear’s friend, Big Back, looks anywhere between late 20s and early 40s but it’s never too late to catch up on education, you suppose.
You spend the rest of your shift feeling motivated.
.
.
“Going camping?” you ask the guy with the sandy blonde hair, chuckling nervously and ringing his items through.
Either he’s going camping or he’s gonna kill and hide a dead body in the forest.
He’s pretty stoic, only giving you a curt nod. You can’t help but probe him a bit more. You’ve got a feeling that if or when the dead body turns up, you want to at least clear your conscience that you’ve tried your best so you make some more idle small talk.
You mention how you haven’t been camping for ages, not since you nearly burned your tent down and singed your hair after you tried to cook some marshmallows over a fire that turned out to be more of a raging bonfire (and might have awoken your pyromaniac streak, but you keep that to yourself).
The blonde guy actually pipes up and says “Master Taesoo would never do that.”
You almost apologise out of principle due to how earnest he sounds, then he mentions something about how good this Master Taesoo is at catching and cooking snake and you wonder what the fuck is up with people and the snake obsession.
Either way, it doesn’t sound like someone is getting murdered. Only a snake (poor snake) so at least you can sleep easy later that day.
.
.
“Oh hi DG,” you say, “Sorry about your cryptocurrency falling through. Diegocoin was it?”
He blinks at you a few times in surprise and heavens above. What’s that saying, fool me once, shame on me; fool me twice, shame on you? This guy has fooled you exactly no times with his shitty disguises and his effort has substantially dwindled too.
He has only put his hood up and you did think you might get mugged at one point-
It’s an empty store, for crying out loud. Who comes into an empty store in the asscrack of night with their hood up, not wanting to draw attention to themselves.
Then you notice the pink hair and shifty glance and duh.
“Is it the-?” he asks, putting his hood down and signalling to his hair.
“Yeah, it’s the-” you signal to your own head of hair. “Dude you really need to dye it if you’re going for subtle.” You pause, consider something, “Hold on.”
You walk over to the beauty aisle and grab the black hair dye.
“On the house,” you tell DG because this guy really has no self awareness.
.
.
“What do you mean no?”
“No." Your boyfriend peers down at you, arms crossed and at the end of his patience with you.
You open your mouth to argue-
“No. You know nothing about Taekwondo. How can you work here?”
You look around helplessly at the studio. He’s not exactly wrong but you’re sick of dealing with the weirdos and the snakes and the creepy blondes. “But your dad-”
“I don’t care what that stupid old man says,”
“Taehoon!” Hansu scolds from the other side of the room, and Hansu's class of toddlers all whirl their head around to stare.
“I can learn?” you offer and Taehoon raises one skeptical brow.
“So you’re going to be a student?” You nod enthusiastically, “And we’re going to pay you for that?”
Oh. Damn.
He’s got you there.
#lookism#lookism x reader#lookism fic#jake kim#jake kim x reader#samuel seo#kwak jichang#kwak jibeom#baek hangyeol#baek hangyul#ryuhei kuroda#jace park#euntae lee#vasco#hudson ahn#diego kang#james lee#seong taehoon#seong taehun#taehoon x reader#wannaeatramyeon#ok ive sorta lost it
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MY SON THE PORN STAR (PART FIVE)
I tried not to go wild. I still was married and still had my normal corporate guy life in Kansas City.
But doing porn turned out to be addictive. It was the combination of a deep exhibitionist streak I was discovering in myself and the access to incredibly hot men willing to suck me or get fucked by my big tool. It made me feel like a total stud... less middle-aged, I guess.
And work trips were the perfect cover. I really was doing the road warrior thing for my company, so I wasn't lying to Kate THAT much. But I did sometimes add a night to my travels.
Like the week after Easter. I had a business trip to Denver, but I added an extra evening and squeezed in a quick connector flight to San Francisco on my dime with miles. Muscle Pup Mike, my son's friend and escort/pornstar buddy, set me up with a versatile OnlyFans star there. I shot two scenes with him, actually, one oral, one with me masked as we had a nice, long 50-minute fuck scene. I didn't feel a deep chemistry with Kevin, aka "Jeff Reed," but I felt a deep chemistry with the two cameras that were on us. Besides, sex with a muscular 28-year-old hunk was hard to beat.
Turns out, the next night would beat it. I flew to Denver bright and early in the morning and had my sales meeting all day. I was rolling my business-style carry on into my hotel room right around dinner. I undid my tie and sat down to unlace my shoes before calling Kate to check in.
Yeah, I felt pretty bad knowing I was stepping out behind her back. I'd deal with that guilt later. Either stopping porn cold turkey or making a break or separation with my wife. At this point I wasn't ready to do either.
I wasn't a frequent poster, but managed a video every 2-3 weeks. And I had a growing following of fans willing to pay a modest subscription for just that. Sure, I got some comments complaining that I never took my mask off, but apparently I had the body and blond-furred looks a lot of guys went for. And my cock size helped - a lot. I was careful about not talking on camera, or I just edited those parts out, but I'd learned to be verbal with my grunts, to show appreciation for my sucker/bottom and to let viewers get that thrill. It worked.
I sat, alone in that quiet hotel room, thinking just how wild my double life had become, and I fiddled with my phone again. Chicago was an hour ahead and now would probably be a good time to call. I pulled up Travis's contact and FaceTimed him.
"Hey Dad," my son greeted.
"Hey," I said, leaning back and feeling my boner ride up in the crotch of my trousers. "I didn't catch you at a bad time, I hope?"
"Nah," he said. "Just getting back from the gym." Indeed, he had a workout zip-up on and I could see the familiar kitchen from his condo in the back.
"All sweaty?" I teased.
That got a laugh out of my son. He was surprised how horny I was sometimes, how much I'd leaned into this weird affair we had going on. "Something like that. How'd your shoot go?"
"Real well," I replied. "Kevin is a real professional. Made it easy."
"Just a professional?" Travis asked, with a teasing smile on his cute face.
"Just fucking," I said. "Not a ton of chemistry, I'm afraid, but I think I got some good footage for the next two vids." I'd always sent Travis the digital files via encryption, and he did the editing magic on the material. As amazing as my son was at being on-screen talent, he also had a knack for making great porn behind the camera.
"Don't take this the wrong way, Dad," he said. "But I think you're a natural adult performer."
I smiled. "Is that what the kids call it?" I joked.
That made my son laugh. I loved seeing and hearing his laugh. "OK... you're a natural porn star, Dad.... You know, it's really hot to say that. I get so hard watching you perform, you know."
My throat got dry. Travis knew how to work me up. "Jesus, Trav. You have no idea how much I've watched your videos."
That made my son laugh again, those dimples forming. "I have a pretty good idea, Dad. You've told me before."
"I lied," I teased. "I figured if I told you the real number, you'd get freaked out."
"Turned on is more like it, Dad," Travis said. "Why don't you show me how much you like em. You hard now?"
"Rock hard," I said. I turned the phone down to show off the rod forming a ridge in my trousers.
"Fuck," Travis hissed. "My dad has a real porn star dick. I have a shoot in a couple of hours. I'll definitely be thinking of your cock."
"Who's it with?" I asked. This was the wild phase Trav and I were at now. Father and son, lovers, flirts, and professional colleagues in the adult entertainment business.
"Bud and Spike," he said. I recognized the screen names of two muscle daddies from Dallas, into the more hardcore stuff.
I made a wince of an expression. "Go easy with those guys, buddy," I said. "For real." I felt strangely protective of my son. Which was weird, because in general he was the one looking out for me as I began doing porn more regularly.
Travis smiled. "I will, Dad. Promise. We're planning a more vanilla scene than they normally do." He gave me a wink. "Listen, I gotta go get ready, actually."
"All right, buddy," I said. I wished we had time for some phone sex because just talking to Travis was turning me on big time. "I can't wait to see your scene. And I'll be in Chicago in a couple of weeks. We'll catch up then, OK?"
"You bet, Dad," he said. "Love ya."
"Love ya, too, Big Guy."
We hung up.
I let out a hiss of air. I was horny now. Turns out "Jeff Reed" hadn't drained me. I did have a back up idea. There was some University of Colorado kid who'd been emailing me on the anon account Travis set up for me and linked to my OnlyFans. Call me a narcissist, but I'd been eating up the fan mail, and something about this college dude Bryan won me over. Maybe it was the pics he sent. Cute as fuck, brown haired, boy-next-door looks. And the nude pics that showed a surprisingly built body for a college kid - either a jock or someone who hit the college gym regularly. Smooth body with just a dusting of a treasure trail, creamy white skin, washboard abs, hard cock, amazing bubble ass.
Or maybe it was the request that I hit him up if I was ever in the Denver area.
So far I'd only done pro-amateur porn stars in the OF circuit my son and MusclePup Mike worked in. Some of it was the self-justification that it wasn't fully emotional cheating, just porn I was doing. Some of it was caution. All the arrangements went through Mike and because of my mask, no one knew my identity.
But I was horny now and sent this Bryan kid a message. I didn't expect a reply, but it was worth a shot. I set down my phone and undressed to take a quick shower. It was only 6:30, but it had been a long day.
There was a message waiting for me. "God yes, man," Bryan wrote. "I could be there in about an hour and a half," he wrote. Then almost nervously, there was a follow up. "God, I must seem overly eager. But fuck you're so hot. Let me know what works for you."
"How bout 8:30?" I typed back and gave my hotel name and room number. I wanted to get some food in me.
"Awesome. Yeah. See you soon," came the almost immediate reply.
I had only business casual clothes packed, so I got dressed to grab a bite at a restaurant near my hotel. I got back to my room with about ten minutes to spare. I brushed my teeth and checked my appearance in the mirror. I wasn't crazy about getting older, I had to admit, but I could see the "DILF" look that Travis and Mike were always raving about. Well-preserved was the expression, I suppose.
I was actually a little nervous when I heard the knock. I had no business fooling around with a guy like this. Not making a porn vid but actually having a cheating hook up. The messed up thing is that most guys would consider the videos a worse infraction, but this felt naughtier in a way.
Bryan looked great. Better than great. He was cuter than his pictures, and I think his nerves made him more attractive to me. He forced a smile but was shaking.
"Hey," he said.
"Hey," I smiled. "Come in, bud."
He was shorter than me, and his size made his collegiate muscle look more compact on his build. Maybe not collegiate wrestler exactly, but definitely that wrestler body type. A little thick, even. MusclePup Mike would have called him a twunk.
"I didn't know what you'd look like," Bryan said softly. His gray eyes were taking me in.
I remembered now he'd never seen me outside of my videos, all masked up. "You came over anyway," I observed.
"Oh yeah," he enthused. "You're my favorite porn star, hands down." He blushed but didn't stop gushing. "You probably know this... I guess most guys don't pay to watch your videos, but I subscribed to your site so I could email you."
"For real?" I laughed.
"Yeah," Bryan replied, that nervous smile growing bigger. "You're not on Twitter or Insta," he explained. His eyes swept up and down my frame. "God, you're even hotter in person. I knew you'd be hot, but... wow."
I was eating up his flattery. "You're not so bad yourself, buddy... bring it in..." I held up my arms to gesture him to come in for a kiss. He did. He was nervous and that turned me on for some reason. But once we started making out, Bryan got real into it, meeting my tongue with his, before practically sucking me into his mouth.
His hands were feeling it up, tentatively at first, then all over. He chuckled as he pulled back so he could feel me up better. I stood there and let his hands roam over my button-down shirt and the gym-toned muscle underneath. At that moment I was VERY glad for the personal trainer Travis set me up with.
"I hope you don't mind my saying," Bryan said, "But it's so wild to be with a porn star."
"Don't mind at all, buddy," I hissed. I was now experiencing the other thrill of doing porn. I knew I was into the exhibitionism of it all, but now I was feeling the hero worshop, the adoration of a young guy like this. I was rock hard.
He gulped as I reached down to undo my khakis, unzipping them and reaching in to haul out my dong. "I guess you really like my cock, then, huh?" I growled.
This wasn't me. At least it wasn't Brad Connors. Married father of three. Road warrior corporate guy. But being MaskedDaddy gave me the sexual confidence and freedom to be someone else.
"Fuck yeah," Bryan gasped as he saw my prick. "That cock's so fucking big..." His eyes were wide, taking in my size before he looked up at me. "OK, if I touch it?"
"I'd be disappointed if you didn't, buddy," I said. "That's why you came over isn't it?"
He nodded, like a chastised kid. Then tentatively he stepped in again and reached forward, like he was afraid of being branded by a hot poker. But once his fingers made contact, the hesitation was gone. The college dude circled his fingers and round me, griping my hardon and gently stroking a couple inches of it to get a feel of the girth and heft. "You don't know how much I've jerked off to your videos," he said. "I wasn't gonna admit to that you, but fuck...." His voice was heavy in his ragged breathing but still had that frat-bro collegiate kind of tone.
"I think we talked about you sucking that dick," I grunted. In our texts, Bryan had offered a blow job, and his presence now was making me really want this. In a surprising way, his realness was making me click with the college kid more than I did with a megahot porn star. Maybe it was the opposite of what Bryan was feeling, where he was living out his porn dream.
"Yeah," he nodded. But he gave me a sheepish shrug. "I, um, don't have a lot of experience."
I patted his cheek. "Give it your best, bud. Please. Daddy's really fucking horny." Yep, this was porn me talking, but it was the magic words for Bryan, who couldn't get down on his knees fast enough.
The young stud actually whimpered as he pulled my dick to his face and began licking it. It was slobbery and impetuous, and his attempt to take me into mouth was more urgent than skilled.
"Easy, buddy..." I urged as he choked a little on my size. "Daddy's got a big cock... take your time."
He nodded and moaned around my prick, flashing those gray eyes up, a little teary. Fuck.
I wouldn't say he got the hang of, but he got a lot more comfortable. Slowly, he sucked me, a few inches at a time, working up the focus to get an extra one back into his throat. The young dude was so excited to blow me, and I was loving this. Slowly I stroked his hair and encouraged him. "That's it, sport... you don't need the training wheels do ya? You go right for the big ones. OH FUCK, that feels nice."
"Yeah?" Bryan asked as he spit out my cock and swallowed the excess spit. I could tell he wanted to make sure he was sucking me right, but more than that he struck me as a young man who craved positive feedback in sex.
"You're doing great, buddy," I said.
There was something about this connection which was night and day different than "Jeff Reed." Bryan was a real guy, a college stud eager for me and not just playing out sex for the camera. And yet...
"You interested in filming this, Bryan? It's SO hot to watch you, buddy."
I could see two reactions in his face at once. A fearful shock at the idea. And an excitement to even consider it. "Oh man," he responded, not giving me a hint which one was the bigger emotion.
I slowly stroked my rod in front of his face, working in his spit over my dong and letting it get steel hard for his gaze. I had toyed with using viagra for my shoots, but even with my size I didn't have an issue getting real hard erections like this. I just loved sex too much.
"If it helps, I packed a spare mask," I offered.
Maybe another dude would have wondered why I had a mask with me, much less more than one mask. But Bryan had been used to seeing me in one, so maybe it just seemed normal to him.
"This is crazy," he said, his fearful look breaking into a smile.
"Is that a yes or a no?" I asked, gently tapping his cheek with my dong.
"Yes," he muttered excitedly before taking ne into his mouth once more.
I let him work me for a few seconds then pulled back. I went to my carryon back and retrieved the masks. I wouldn't need one, I suppose, but I tossed both over Bryan's way while I got my portable tripod, a compact digital camera, and a spare cameraphone, an old Iphone I used for extra handheld footage.
I was worried I was killing the mood setting everything up and fiddling with the lights. But I loved shooting porn, and if anything my dick was harder in anticipation with shooting a different kind of scene. Me with an amateur costar. Even if Bryan wasn't an experienced I just knew this would be a hot video. And if not, I'd enjoy jerking off to it.
Fortunately, Bryan seemed excited too. I could see the excitement in his eyes, even behind the mask. He'd taken his shirt off, maybe to be less identifiable but was on his knees still, hands braced on his thighs. "I can't believe I'm going to be in one of your vids," he said. Yeah, the dude was into this.
I sauntered back, my dick leading the way. "If you're not comfortable with the results, we don't have to post anything," I said, remembering how important that veto power was for my comfort level for my first vid with my son. "Otherwise, I'll take this as your consent."
"Got it," he nodded.
The second his lips touched my prick again, I let out a gasp. He looked up at me, excited, and I took in his green eyes looking up through the mask holes. I pointed the phone camera at him to capture that. I wasn't gonna shoot that angle the whole time, since I preferred to enjoy getting head instead of playing cameraman the whole time. But the snapshots of him looking up would add to the effect.
Bryan's technique wasn't better this time, but his enthusiasm had tripled, at least. I set down the phone and eased my stance back, my posture upright. I was still in my business casual attire as this horny college kid blew me. I urged him to go slower at first with a quick deep grunt.
I heard the guy moan around my meat as something relaxed in his throat and he was able to more steadily take more of my dong into his throat. Working me up and down, I reached behind his head and massaged his scalp through the mask, gently urging him deeper.
"Yes," I choked in response. "Suck me." I'd gotten pretty good at deguising my voice. Using my porn voice. "Suck Daddy."
That did it. Bryan pulled off for a quick breath, then descended all the way down. I'm a big guy, and even some of the OnlyFans studs had a hard time swallowing my sword. But they weren't feeling the crazy sexual thrill this kid was.
He held a second then it was too much, and he pulled off with a sputtering cough. I could see his eyes watering even through the mask holes.
"Sorry," he breathed, as he tried to regain composure.
"It's OK... take your time," I said in my normal voice. Travis would have to edit that out. All for the best. I gave Bryan a second to catch his breath and then I leaned down and met him for a sensual kiss.
"You're doing real good," I said. Then leaning up, I offered my hard dong again. It had gone down a little, but was still pretty heavy. "Ready for more?" I asked.
He nodded. "Yeah," he said, his gray eyes looking back up at me.
His mouth on me got me rock hard once more. I pulled out some to let the camera catch my full hardon, then pushed back in between his wet lips. Bryan was novice, but that was OK. I was turned on from a change of pace from the OnlyFans dudes. This was a real guy, young and eager. I let him suck and get into sucking.
"Yeah," I grunted, I ran my fingers through his hair again and took the chance to push him down on my meat some more.
Byran was up for the challenge. He grunted around my prick but his throat relaxed and swallowed more of my thickness.
I started cumming. I wanted to ride out the orgasm in his college kid's throat but instead I pulled out and shot a couple of jets onto his mask and his lips before pushing back in just a few inches to let him suckle the remaining dribbles of semen.
I caught my breath a half second then picked up the cameraphone again. I hadn't taken too much handheld footage, so now I got a good view of Bryan slurping on my sated meat, licking up and down and outright worshipping my cock. Thankfully I wasn't too sensitive after nutting, and even if I lost a little of my rigidity, my dick kept a heavy firm meatiness that looked good.
I finally pulled back and turned both cameras off. "You were amazing, buddy," I said with a smile.
Already Bryan was pulling his mask off. I was glad. The guy was real fucking cute. "Dream come true for me," he said.
I could tell he was still horned up and at full sexual arousal from servicing me. "Get on the bed, kiddo," I urged. "Lie back."
He didn't seem to know what was going on but he complied. His body was shaking some as I undid his jeans and yanked them down.
"What are we gonna do?" he asked with some apprehension. Still he raised each leg to let me pull off his jeans. And his boxers showed a thick boner beneath the cotton.
"Your turn to get off," I said, not really answering his question.
Still, Bryan nodded and hooked his thumbs in the elastic of his boxers to slide them down. I let him take them off as I stepped into the bathroom to get lube out of my toiletties bag.
Bryan was now lying back on the bed, fully naked, his creamy white muscle looking even better than I anticipated now that he was stripped nude.
"You an athlete?" I asked as I flipped open the cap on the lube.
Bryan's eyes were nervously only the lube. I think I knew what he was worried about, and a part of me enjoyed playing with his nervousness. I'll give him credit, he put on a brave face as his eyes met mine to answer me. "Yeah. Wrestling.""
My guess had been spot on. "It shows," I said. "You have an amazing body."
"Thanks," he said, watching me get on the bed, me making a show of drizzling some lube on his hardon. His dick twitched, untouched, he was so turned on. "You have more the football build."
"Baseball was my sport," I answered. "And golf. But my trainer has helped me bulk up."
"You're my fantasy," he said softly. "The whole package. None of the guys know I'm into this, though." I could read in his face that he wasn't sure if he should be getting emotionally open like this.
I patted his thigh and set down the lube on the night stand with my other hand. I was fully dress, with my cock sticking out of the fly of my khakis still. I wasn't sure I wanted to get off again, but I knew I could. Bryan was hot as fuck, and I was grooving on his clear attraction to me.
"A shame," I winked, trying to make the conversation sexy again. "Maybe you could have some fun. With you coach, too."
That got a laugh from him. Bryan had a sexy smile. "I've definitely thought of Coach. A lot."
I rubbed his legs some more more, outright caressing them now. His quads were solid as fuck, hard brawn that contrasted with the soft collegiate fur. I copped a feel of his ball sac, lightly haired and ran my fingers up the lubey length of his shaft.
"Lift your legs, bud," I urged, my tone friendly even as my words were commanding.
He got that deer in the headlights look. "I've never done this," Bryan said softly.
I had a good idea what he meant. "You a virgin?" I asked. My eyes doing their best friendly look I could manage as I played with his hard dick and his balls. Not stroking him, more exploring his rigid younger dick. Getting him excited to play more.
"For fucking, yeah..." he replied. "Sorry."
I don't think I realized till then how much I wanted to tap this hot wrestler's ass. Maybe his innocence was fueling some of my desire, too. "Not gonna do anything you're not ready for buddy," I said. "Come on, just lift your legs for Daddy."
Maybe that was the magic word, because Bryan leaned back and raised his legs up.
"You can pull em back," I instructed, taking a good look before leaning forward and crouching down.
"Holy FUCK!" the kid gasped at the first swipe of my tongue. His hair down there was light, and I enjoyed the contrast with hairier guys or even the OnlyFans dudes who shaved smooth. It was a delight to lick up and down the trench and then focus more on his tight pucker.
"Jesus," Bryan gasped. He wasn't naturally verbal, but I could tell his mind was being blown. Surprised, maybe a little ticklish but he definitely loved getting rimmed.
I pulled back. That ring was drum tight all right. It made me realize I'd never eaten out a cherry hole before. My son's certainly wasn't virgin. "Go ahead and stroke off," I urged. I relished the ability to speak in my normal voice now that the cameras were off, even as some of my Masked Daddy persona came out anyway. "I want you to come kiddo."
I watched as he excitedly gripped his boner and start to stroke it. Then I dove back in. Not just rimming but fully eating him out, munching the tightness of his asshole.
"Oh fuck, oh fuck," the kid gasped. I knew his orgasm was starting. I held onto the back of his meaty thighs and even pushed back a little to angle him perfectly to got to town with my tongue and my sucking mouth.
"NMNGGH!" came the grunt of his cum. Bryan's whole body was tensing up and I knew he was giving up his load in a big way.
Indeed as I pulled back I saw that beautiful creamy white wrestler muscle sprayed with splotches of his sperm. I began licking it up off his abs and chest, saving it in my mouth before I finally met him in a kiss to share it.
The snowballing caught him by surprise but he was way into it, accepting his own cum then pushing it back into my mouth, our tongues working it back and forth and frothing it up with our own saliva.
He had a big, content smile on his face when finally parted, swallowing what little seed was left on our tongues. "I thought..." he started then stopped himself.
"I know, buddy," I said. I patted his chest gently. "I won't lie... I came THIS close to pushing your boundaries."
He nodded, emotionally raw. I could tell he half wanted me to. But only half. "I know. I don't know how, but I could tell."
His hand reached up and ran along my arm through my button down shirt. "I'll probably be kicking myself for not going all the way. But I wasn't ready," he said.
"It was all great, buddy," I assured him.
"I should go," he said. "I got a long drive back to Boulder."
I pulled back and gave him one last pat as I eyed up his nakedness one more time. Bryan was the real deal. Not a "jock" for pay. I felt a strange emotional connection even with the sexual chemistry. I'd have to process why I was feeling that.
For now, I let him up and I went to piss while he got dressed again. When I stepped back from the bathroom, he was mostly dressed again, and had a dreamy, moody expression.
"Thanks for that... fuck I don't even know your name."
"Will 'Daddy' do?" I asked with a wink.
"Guess it will have to," he said with resignation. "You've made my dream come true."
I stepped up for a final kiss, then I showed him to the hotel room door.
***
I was glad Bryan didn't sleep over. I needed a good rest and I had a busy schedule with my client visit the next day.
It felt like naughty fun messaging Bryan when I got a chance, though. It started off with "had a great time" kind of texts, but Bryan admitted how he wished he'd gone all the way.
"Maybe if you're in town again, I'll have the courage," he admitted.
"I'm in town another night if you manage to get that courage, kiddo."
There was silence on his end. Like an hour and a half before I got another text, and even then it was a half hour before I had a break after my afternoon presentation.
"Sorry," Bryan wrote. "Was in class and my prof goes apeshit if we're on our phones LOL."
I texted. "I worried I'd spooked you."
This time the reply was quicker. "Dude, you don't know how horny I've been all day. You're definitely not spooking me."
I bit my lip and looked around. I probably looked like I was doing business texts on my phone. But fuck I was getting horny too. Somehing about this Bryan kid got under my skin. "Is that a yes?" I wrote. "You gonna give me your cherry?"
I was pushing boundaries now for sure, but Bryan seemed up for it now, more than the previous night. "I wanna. Yeah."
"Daddy wants to get in your hole SO bad, buddy." Then, "I'll go easy on you."
"God yes," came his reply. "I'm hard as fuck now."
God this was gonna happen. One more boundary to push. "Will you let me fuck you on camera?"
There was a pause now. Then, "Masked?"
"As you like," I wrote, almost hoping Bryan wouldn't wear one, even if I knew he would. To coax him, I added, "I'll tell you my first name if you let me film us."
"Deal. LOL."
I looked up. Folks were filing back into the conference room. I hoped my chubbed cock wouldn't show. "I gotta go. But maybe plan for 8:30? I have a work dinner before."
"God yes. I can't believe we're going to do this."
"We're going to do it, Kiddo." I assured him. "I want you so bad."
I got a blushing emoji in return and had to smile. "All right," he wrote. "Talk later."
I went into my meeting and was able to get my mind off Bryan's creamy smooth wrestler build and his cherry hole. Somehow.
I checked my messages after we wrapped up, before heading off to a business dinner. It was close to my hotel thankfully and these things never ran late. I hoped to see a message from Bryan, but there was nothing.
I did google some instructions for preparing to bottom. With the OnlyFans guys and my own son, that routine was down pat, but a newbie like Bryan could use some guidance, and I wanted the ease and comfort of topping a clean hole. I forwarded the site to Bryan.
I held off to one glass of wine during dinner. I wanted a clear head for later. By 7:40 I'd paid the check on my corporate card and bid good night to my client contacts. I had to laugh at myself by how excited I was to get back to my hotel. I did have time to stop at an office supply store and pick up a spare small camera. I figured this scene would be worth the extra vantage point.
Bryan texted when he was on his way. I stripped down from my business clothes and hung them up in the closet. I was rock hard already, and dripping in anticipation. I hadn't felt this excited since my last time with my son. I took a quick shower and put on the plush hotel robe, tying it to cover up my midsection.
I spent the rest of the time setting up the cameras. The lighting wasn't perfect but it was enough.
The knock made me realize I was a little nervous myself. I'd gotten comfortable doing porn, maybe a little too comfortable, but taking Bryan's cherry felt like a certain responsibility. I wanted it to be an incredible experience for him, and I was realizing I was totally green when it came to easing a guy out of his virginity.
Still, the sight of him made my heart beat. He was just so fucking cute and hunky. Particularly was we realized each other was nervous.
"Hey, Daddy," he said stepping in.
"Brad," I said. "You can call me Brad. Or Daddy," I smirked.
Our kiss was soft, surprisingly soft given the act we were about to do.
"You good for his, buddy?" I asked, running my hands along his outer arms.
He nodded. "I'm nervous as hell, but I'll be kicking myself if I don't do it."
"You feel like stripping down?" I asked. "There's a mask for you on the table."
I pulled mine on and then went around made sure all the cameras were on. I was pleased to see Bryan's naked body, that thick muscle lean and compact with just a dusting of hair. God, even with that build he looked every bit the 20 year old he was. Like I say, the real deal.
And I was doubly pleased to see him throwing hard. That thick five spike standing up from his lightly furred crotch, nerves notwithstanding. I watched him pull on his mask. It was a shame the viewers wouldn't see how cute he was but his body rounded out that college jock look for sure.
I pointed the camera at him. "So... we're about to have sex for a video that will be released through OnlyFans. Do you agree for me to share what I film?"
I half expected some questions, but he just nodded. "Yes."
"Good boy," I said with a laugh. That made Bryan chuckle, too, which made me glad. "Why don't you lie on the bed, face down?"
I could sense his nervousness. Maybe he anticipated face to face for his first time. "Don't worry buddy, I'll ease you into this."
He nodded silently and then complied, walking over to the hotel bed, while I filmed him with his natural jock gait. It was hot as fuck, seeing him strut and that ass of his work. Then his full body stretching out face down.
The other cameras would get a good angle - one angled on each side nightstand, the other from behind where I stood, just a little off to the side. I held the camera phone as I stepped closer, letting the camera rove over his strong back and amazing ass, up and down his legs. Maybe more jock-worship footage than we'd use, but Travis could work his magic.
Finally, I stepped back and propped the camera phone off to the side. maybe it would work for another angle. Bryan turned back to look at me, and I got off on how his back muscle flexed with his motion. Stepping up, I ran my hands along his calves, working up the length as I climbed on the bed.
I knew I'd be in good view of the cameras now as I kissed from one side of his hamstrings to the other knotted leg. I took my time working my way up.
Bryan was ready for the rim job now. Hiking his ass up, he parted his legs enough to let me in. My hands gripped his buns and did the rest.
The college kid's sigh was deep and sexual as I began licking. I wanted to put on a show. I loved rimming a guy and sometimes felt there was never enough of it in porn videos. It was always a quick lick before the top was lining up. I went full in now, eating out Bryan for a solid five to ten minutes, alternating speed and tonguework. Sometimes Bryan relaxed and let me do my magic, sometimes he bucked up against my face to maximize the contact.
I pulled back and with a hungry growl gave him a light pat. "Turn over," I urged in my deeper voice. Spittle wetted down the chin of my mask. I really wished he and I could do it without these, but the masks allowed us to fuck on camera, both of us.
I was amazed to see Bryan's prick hard and leaking clear sap everywhere. He was majorly turned on. I pulled up enough to let the cameras get a good view of his ripped, modestly jacked body.
"How many guys have fucked you?" I asked tersely. I sure hoped the "MaskedDaddy" voice was enough fo a disguise.
Bryan didn't change his voice, but his soft response was sexy as hell. "No one yet," he said.
I leaned in and kissed him. Just enough sexual urge, and enough romantic finesse. Bryan responded in turn, sucking my tongue into his mouth and moaning against me. He was nervous, sure, but also getting the case of the major horns.
I loved this, putting on a show and yet connecting one-to-one with this fine young man. I pulled up and muttered, "nice," patting his chest. I rolled off to the side and undid my robe. My hardon bounded out and both Bryan and the camera could see my exposed body with its blond fur. I pulled him to me and we started making out again.
Silently I guided him down and the kid knew what to do. Slowly he began kissing and worshipping my big prick, wetting it down with his tongue before taking me into his mouth. Practice hadn't made perfect, but he was getting much more accustomed to my size and better at blowing me.
I was determined not to get overheated. I just lay back and enjoyed this, the sensation of Bryan's soft, slow blowjob and the view of his nakedness kneeling in front of me in servicing position.
Soon, though, it was feeling too good. I nudged him off. He came up to meet me for a kiss, taking the initiative now, until I regained the upperhand in rolling him back on his back, with me on top. I could feel his hardon against mine and the warmth from his body.
Placing my mouth at his ear, I whispered, "You like being a porn star too, dont ya kiddo?"
"Yeah," he grunted back.
I knew I needed to be a little verbal with him. If the camera picked up my words, Travis could edit them out. "You're just about the hottest guy I've ever fucked, Bry."
His body actually shivered at that. The time seemed ripe. I lifted off and leaned over to pump out some lube.
He let out a hiss of air the second my greased fingers touched his pucker but he didn't flinch. Instead he spread his legs and looked into my eyes. This was gonna be good.
I pushed a digit in. Bryan was real fucking tight. But I worked him slowly. Back and forth, in and out.
"Another," I said curtly.
"God," he hissed as I penetrated him with two fingers. It wasn't bad-uncomfortable for him, but it was certainly unfamiliar to him. We stood still eyes locked, him lying back, me between his legs. Until I started finger fucking him again. I applied more lube and fingered him some more.
Finally I pulled back and removed my robe entirely, slipping it off my body and tossing it aside. Bryan's hands were on me, excited to feel up my DILF body. I let him. Between his attention and the cameras I was getting real excited. I was the one dripping now. I caught a thick thread of precum in my fingers and brought it down to his virgin hole. I fingered him up with that too.
The third finger was slow going, but I got him to relax.
"No rubber?" I have asked and half said.
"No sir," came his excited reply.
I was gonna get blue balls soon if I didn't fuck. I scooted up and pressed my prick head in place. I pressed super slow against his ring, working against the spit-slick tightness and smearing my precum against him.
I could feel Bryan's body shake beneath me, and he looked up, a real deer-in-the-headlights look in his eyes beneath the mask. I worried if I waited longer his nerves would get the best of him. I pushed in.
"UNNH!" he whimpered loudly. I felt bad the entry hurt and bad that he was doing his bravest to pretend it didn't.
"Easy, bud..." I hissed, reaching down to run my hands along his hot body. This fine young man was giving me a major gift. My prick jerked an inch or two inside him, feeling the tightness of his ass clamping down on him, as I held still, then gave the shallowest of thrusts, back and forth more than in and out.
I looked at him, trying to communicate silently. Then I leaned in, pushing his legs back with my body. "You're doing good," I said.
We kissed. My cock slipped out of its toe hold but I didn't care. He needed this, and I wanted it. This was about the only time I lost track of the cameras. When I wasn't putting on a show. I connected with this college kid in a deep, soulful kiss. And kissed him som more.
I pulled back. This time I didn't rush, but I didn't delay. I pushed back into him. Bryan somehow trusted me, because his ring gave way more easily. He was virgin tight a few inches inside, but I gently thrust back and forth, working that knot inside him. I pulled out and added more lube. Now showing off for Bryan and the cameras both. Then I placed his ankles on my shoulders.
"OOH FUCK!" Came his cry when I broke through. But he wasn't in pain, just overwhelmed by feelings he didn't have word for. I plowed all the way in and held it. I could see his muscular chest rise and fall, taking deep breaths.
"Got your cherry, kiddo," I hissed.
"Thank you," he actually replied, his voice heavy in emotion. That got me going. My dick felt like stone inside his warm, tight guts.
"Feel good buddy?" My hands massaged his calf muscle as I looked down on him and restrained myself from just plowing his hot ass.
Bryan nodded.
I pulled and out thrust in. Then again. I was fucking for real now. Bryan's first fuck. Maybe more than he bargained for when he came over the previous night. But I knew this was his deep fantasy and why he reached out to me.
I wasn't hard or rough, but I fucked with a steady determination. I wanted to give this kid the best first time experience possible now. I puffed my chest and used more of a swivel action of my hips, in and out, in and out, as my eyes stared down at him. I'd probably read his facial reactions better without the mask, but his eyes and mouth were enough. I was getting to him, hitting that spot.
I paused just a second and reached to pump out more lube. This went onto his prick. He gasped as I slicked him up then got the picture once I pulled my hand away.
I grabbed a pillow and slid it underneath his hips. It made for the perfect angle, and I took quick advantage, resuming my steady plow of Bryan's no-longer virgin hole.
Turns out his masturbation was just what Bryan needed, flipping the switch to full pleasure now.
"Yeah?" I asked. Fucking heavier now.
"Yesss," the college hunk hissed back. He was jerking faster now, not frantically but eagerly and in synch with the fuck.
I saw his pisslit dilate and a clear spurt fly out. Not his ejaculation yet, but the prelude.
"Fuck yes," I grunted, throwing my hips into harder pounding. I was getting close to the finish line, and I wanted to speed up to catch up with this stud.
My harder thrusts felt amazing giving how much his ass was clenching and releasing on my dick spasmodically. But it really made Bryan's prostate sing. His pale skin grew pink and flush and his wrestler muscle tensed up.
"Shit!" he yelled and timed with each shove his nuts gave it up, and his prick spurted heavy ropes of semen over his perfect body.
I went at it even harder, leaning in some, powering my hips in rapid jabs. I didn't say anything but my grunt was unmistakeable as I shoved in and unloaded. My cum threw off my rhythm, but I held deep a second, then my hips jerked involuntarily for another hard shove to discharge my seed deep inside Bryan.
The kid winced at that one, which made me feel bad. I got myself under control and held myself steady, gently massaging his leg and then easing back. He'd been a trooper but now needed a break. I leaned back and showed off my slickened dong, though most viewers eyes would probably be on the cum-covered collegiate muscle of my bottom.
Leaning over I picked up one of the cameras. Time for the money shot.
Even if Bryan wasn't an experienced bottom, he'd watched enough porn to know what I was after. Rather than drop his legs down, he pulled them back, spreading them enough to show me and the camera his fucked and seeded hole. No longer drum tight, it has a slight gape and was thick with my cum. I'd shot a lot.
I got a good shot of it, then angled the camera up to capture his whole ripped and cum-wet body. Nothing would ever top watching my own son in porn, but Bryan was a close second.
I finally set down the phone and pulled off my mask. That was the cue Bryan was waiting for and he eagerly peeled his off.
"You OK, buddy?" I asked. My normal voice returning.
He nodded. "God yeah. I'm so glad we did that."
I gave a sly nod to the camera. "Your first time's preserved as a memento," I said. A little teasing in my voice, but checking in where his head was.
He smiled and god he was so fucking cute with that pearly white smile. "I didn't think I was gonna enjoy it at first," he admitted. "But damn..."
I ran my fingers through the cum that had turned liquidy on his chest. "You shot like gangbusters," I said.
"My cums are pretty big normally," he said. "But your dick did something inside me that made me go wild. I've never felt anything like that."
"I'm glad," I said. I leaned forward for another kiss, this one tantalizingly soft and slow.
Afterward, I let Bryan get up and shower off while I checked my phone. Then I figured I'd join him. The look on his face told me my presence was quite welcome.
"Hey," he grinned, shyly. God, he was star struck and that made me feel like a real stud.
"Hey," I said. Our wet bodies connected and we took the time to soap each other down.
"You married to a man or a woman?" he asked as he nodded to my gold band.
"A woman," I said. "I'm not the best husband."
He gave a nod of acknowledgment. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm glad you share yourself."
"I have news for you kiddo," I said, turning off the water and running my hands over his wet muscled body. "You've shared yourself now, too."
"Still can't believe it," he said. "When will you post it?"
"In a couple of weeks," I said. I wasn't going to bring up Travis or my process for putting the vid together.
His hands reached up to feel my body too, my chest but also my shoulders and arms.
"I'm hard again," Bryan said. "I can't believe it."
"You're 20," I joked. "It happens."
"Yeah," he laughed.
I patted his arm. "Feel like sleeping over?" I asked. "I have a morning flight to catch but you're welcome to stay."
He nodded, like an eager puppy. We dried off and made our way back into the room. I downed a bottled water to rehydrate and tossed him one. "Remind me to tip housekeeping extra," I said as I pulled down the sheets. "We made a fucking mess."
He slipped into the bed next to me. His body was cooler now, and felt great against my warmer bod. We made out. His dick was a spike and I got hard once more, but I wasn't eager for another fuck. And Bryan seemed to go with the flow.
"So..." I finally said. "No longer a virgin..."
"No sir."
"Any regrets?" I asked, leaning back in the bed against the headboard, pulling my hands behind me. Bryan nestled in, resting his head against my upper chest and running his hands along my fur.
"None. It was hot as fuck," he said. "But even if it hadn't been, I just feel relieved, you know?"
"Not exactly," I smiled knowingly.
"Ha," he said, picking up on my meaning. "I'm surprised your so good at breaking a guy in if you're cherry too."
"I'd like to say I had some secret," I admitted, "But I just did what felt right."
Maybe it was the sex. I mean it was getting late, but not that late. Bryan was dozing some as he rested up against me. I ran my fingers through his hair.
"Ready for bed, kiddo?" I asked.
"Yeah, Brad," he said and rolled off to the side.
***
My son did his magic crafting two separate scenes from the footage with Bryan, as well as a very hot teaser. "Taking College Jock's Cherry" was the title of the second. The on-screen chemistry was real, and it was clear that we weren't faking it. I really did take the young dude's virginity on screen.
"God, Dad, this is fucking incredible," Travis said to me on the phone before he posted the scene. "I've shot three times to it."
I smiled. I was in a semi-public place and had to be a little discrete. "I'm very glad to hear that," I smirked. "A little payback to the one you did the other week."
"Bud and Spike?" he asked.
That one was one was OK, but not my favorite. "No, the other one," I said, cagily.
That got a laugh from Trav. "Oh, MiamiMuscles... dude's a crazy power bottom, right?"
"Yeah," I said, my throat getting hoarse with lust I was trying to hide. "I like watching you in action like that."
Travis picked up on my need to be discreet, though he had no constraints on his end. "You prefer watching me fuck, Dad?"
God, my son knew how to drive me crazy. "I do," I admitted.
I detected a hesitation on his end, which wasn't Travis's normal response to anything. He paused. "Dad... you ever think about, you know, me fucking you?"
Just hearing those words were going make me go from chubbed to boned. "It's a little scary to think about," I replied. "But yeah... I do."
"Oh fuck," Travis hissed. Only then did I realize he'd been dreaming of that very act. Topping me. Taking my anal cherry, like I'd done with that Denver kid. It surprised me actually, given our bedroom chemistry with my son bottoming for me, eager for his dad's cock. "We'll talk about it next time, OK?" he said. Not pressuring me but letting me know this was on his mind.
"Yeah," I said. "I'll probably chicken out, son. But I wanna explore the idea." I was nervous just vocalizing this.
"Sure, Dad," Trav said. "God you know I love everything we'd done together. If I were there right now, I'd suck your cock, you know that." My son was getting into deep lust mode now.
"Fuck, Trav, I should probably go," I said. I knew if I kept talking like this, I'd get in trouble. "Later, son?"
"Yeah, Dad," he replied, his voice rich with lust. I knew he was probably going to jack off when I hung up. I was going to find the time myself at the first chance. Pull up one of Travis's videos where he topped and stroke off imagining him pounding me, too.
****
My Denver videos were popular. I wasn't surprised that my fans responded to the realness of them, but I was surprised by the messages I got. They changed my porn career and it's probably not an overstatement to say they changed my life.
The first one came two weeks after the video with Bryan dropped.
"Dear MaskedDaddy, I loved your latest video. God, it's like my deepest fantasy. I'm 23 and live in DC. I don't have that college jock's bod, but I'm working on it. I've been too scared to let a guy fuck me, but if you want to be my first, I'd love to star in one of your vids. I wouldn't even need a mask."
It was a wild email, and I figured the kid's horniness doing the thinking for him. I pawed my crotch and laughed at how forward the offer was. I started to send a polite thanks but no thanks reply.
But then I thought about it, and I figured what the hell. I asked for the young dude's pictures. He was cute as fuck. Not quite as twunky as Bryan but still good looking, kind of that boy-next-door type.
Travis handled the OnlyFans money my site brought in. I didn't do porn for the money, and in any case I didn't want my finances impacted lest Kate find out.
I sent two more texts that night. One to DC guy. "If you're serious, lets plan for something three weeks from now." I knew I had some work travel on the East Coast I could piggy back on.
My other I sent to Trav. "I need your help arranging a DC visit. Gonna pop another dude's cherry."
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Bro, hear me out,
Bucci squad after unintentionally or intentionally saying something to piss off the reader and reacting to them saying "SORRY I CANT HEAR YOU OVER THE EARTH SHATTERING PROSTATE ORGASM I JUST GAVE YOUR DAD"
I KNOW THAT QUOTE IS FROM SOMEHWERE ELSE BUT PLEASE BARE WITH ME HERE ID LOVE TO SEE THIS WRITTEN IN ONE SHOT FORMAT OR WHATEVER FORMAT YOU CAM DO FOR THIS GAMG MADE UP OF TEENAGERS AND FED UP ADULTS
YOU HAVE MY REGRETS
-ANON
THIS IS SO FUNNY I'M LITERALLY DYING
I apologize profoundly for how long this took. I've been busy and i kind of forgot about this account
ok here's how i think they'll react
Bucciarati
You liked stylish things, that's one thing everybody knew. And you would go feral if somebody insulted that;
Therefore, Bucciarati knew exactly how to get on your nerves whenever you got on his;
"At least I have a sense of style. For someone who's obsessed with that topic, dress better" he said rolling his eyes and the moment you processed what he said, the glare in your eyes said everything;
After a few seconds, you came up with the best reply that would surely make him cry;
"SORRY I CANT HEAR YOU OVER THE EARTH SHATTERING PROSTATE ORGASM I JUST GAVE YOUR DAD" you yelled, acting like you couldn't hear a thing;
The other guys were also present at your...argument? and they immediately burst into laughter. Even Abbacchio was smiling;
Meanwhile, Bruno was flabbergasted. He never heard you say such things and he was so shocked that he started laughing. He couldn't bring himself to be offended;
"Excuse you?" he said, raising a brow. "You heard me, manwhore! I fucked your dad!" you continued and the rest of the room started laughing again. What was this, a comedy show?
"Is it fine if I call him to ask him?" Bruno smirked, taking his phone out.
Abbacchio
You and Abbacchio didn't argue often due to him not responding to your yelling, making you calm down and talk normally;
However...This time he was not in the mood to hear you complaining about him not doing the dishes, especially since he was talking with the guys;
"Stop ignoring me, shithead!" you yelled. "If you talked less or started saying things that could actually captivate my attention, I would." he said calmly and you felt your ears burn with rage;
"OH, I'M SORRY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE EARTH SHATTERING PROSTATE ORGASM I JUST GAVE YOUR DAD" you screamed after a few seconds, and the whole room went silent;
Abbacchio's brows furrowed and everybody laughed at your reply, except Giorno, who stopped when Leone glared at him. "What are you laughing at?"
"Hey, shut the fuck up, you're agruing with me, not with Giorno!" you said, bringing his attention back to you;
"You are arguing with yourself, so shut up. I'll deal with you later."
Narancia
You and Narancia were in a relationship and also in a never-ending competition. Everything between you two was a competition. From who got the groceries first to who made the best cookies;
So, naturally, when you heard Narancia discussing about how he was better than you behind your back, you were fuming;
"You motherfucker, learn to wash your boxers then come at me!" you yelled while slamming the door open;
"Huh?" Narancia was taken aback by your yelling, as were the others. "You heard me fucker!"
"At least i wear lingerie so you can wash something." he replied almost instantly and you were beyond shock. The AUDACITY he had. Without thinking about what you were about to say, you yelled:
"OH, I'M SORRY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE EARTH SHATTERING PROSTATE ORGASM I JUST GAVE YOUR DAD"
The guys burst out in laughter and Narancia was literally flabbergasted. He looked so shocked and, in a few moments, he jumped at your neck;
By the terrifying look in his eyes, while he was holding your jaw locked with his hand, you realized that you touched a soft spot;
"How dare you talk about that scumbag as if he could ever catch your eye."
Fugo
It was pretty easy to piss off Fugo, so you two argued every day. You loved annoying people, you found it so funny when they got all worked up over nothing, so you naturally annoyed him for fun. Simply because you found it entertaining;
One day, while the boys were over discussing who knows what, you innocently went to Fugo and asked him the most stupid and useless math question ever: How many angles does a triangle have?
The boys gave you a look and, before you could say something, Fugo snapped. "Are you kidding me? Are you this stupid? How dumb can you be? How is it possible for you to ask me that?" he yelled and you frowned.
"I'm genuinely curious! Why are you being so aggressive?!" you said, trying to be offened. What made your question even more stupid was that your major was mathematics;
"How did you even finish financial analysis?" oh no. He did not just say that! You were now offened and, without thinking, you screamed at him:
"OH, I'M SORRY, MY DUMB EARS CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE EARTH SHATTERING PROSTATE ORGASM I JUST GAVE YOUR DAD"
At that, everyone but Fugo laughed out loud, while you stared at him angrily. The boy had no reaction, except:
"Get out of here before I rip your neck off, we'll talk about that later."
Giorno
Unlike Fugo or Narancia, Giorno wasn't easy to annoy and he never saw you as a competition. You only argued once in your entire relationship;
You were in his lap while you and the boys were at a terrace, hanging out as usual;
Somehow, the discussion shifted to how the boys wanted their significant other to be and, after Fugo said he'd like his to be quiet, Giorno made a comment about how you were never quiet;
It wasn't a remark, he loved your loud side, but he honestly wished you weren't that loud, especially in public;
So, after the conversation moved on, he called your name a few times and you ignored him. "Cara, why aren't you talking to me?";
"OH, I'M SORRY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE EARTH SHATTERING PROSTATE ORGASM I JUST GAVE YOUR DAD" you suddenly said a little louder and your table went quiet;
After a second, all of them, except Giorno, started laughing while the other people gave you looks;
"That was extremely unnecessary, tesoro."
Mista
You two were the loudest, most annoying couple ever. You two were always bickering, always saying dumb jokes and always, but always laughing louder than you should;
It was a funny thing. If people saw you two arguing, throwing insults at each other, they would think you two were the biggest enemies;
You were over at his house, waiting for the others to come for dinner. You were placing the plates down, when Mista suddenly made fun of you:
"You can't even place some plates without looking stupid." he said, giggling softly at the annoyed glare you gave him. "No answer, hun? Cat got your tounge?" he kept going after you returned to placing the cutlery down on the table;
You kept ignoring him, but he continued to make fun of you and, after a few minutes, you were fuming, so you yelled at him:
"OH, I'M SORRY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE EARTH SHATTERING PROSTATE ORGASM I JUST GAVE YOUR DAD!" Mista fell quiet and stared at you;
"Is that so?" You weren't sure what was going to happen next, because in his eyes he had a mix of surprise, anger and...desire?
"I was not expecting to hear this when I entered, but hello to you too." Bruno said while he was standing in the door frame;
Mista went closer to your ear before all of the boys entered and whispered:
"Wait until they are over, you might have something to prove after."
#jjba x reader#jjba x you#jojo x reader#jjba headcanons#jjba#jjba part 5#bucciarati x reader#bucci gang headcanons#mista headcanons#jjba mista#narancia jojo#abbacchio x reader#narancia x reader#fugo x reader#fugo pannacotta#giorno jjba#giorno x reader#mista x reader#leave requests im bored#jojo golden wind#jojo bucciarati#giorno giovanna#abbachio x reader
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could you write a nick x ftm!reader? something like the reader sees a bunch of hate comments about him and nick comforts him? (if not that’s totally ok)
,,My Boy’’
-N.S
Synopsis: You and Nick have been dating for a long time now, and you finally agree to be in one of the boy’s videos. Nick introduces you as his boyfriend, and the viewers find out you are trans. Some don’t respond the best to this, but Nick is there to comfort you.
pairing: bf!nick sturniolo (he/him) X trans ftm!reader (he/him)
warnings: homophobia, transphobia, panic attack, gender dysphoria, body dysphoria, cyber bullying, threats, harassment, homophobic & transphobic slurs (i promise i can say them. id never EVER say a slur i couldnt!!) and i think thats all! please let me know if i missed one <3
requested?: yes!
back to: masterlist
—FIRST PERSON POV—
After Nick constantly asking me if I was positive I don’t want to finally be in one of the triplets videos, I reluctantly agree.
I have been dating nick for around eight months, and we have kept our relationship a ‘secret’, for these past eight months, and i finally agreed to be in a video.
Matt got back into the car, shutting the door behind himself. Nick smiled at me, before speaking up.
“Welcome back, everybody! Today, we have a special guest, my boyfriend, y/n!” Nick boasts. I love how he openly called me his boyfriend, but i was worried. were his fans going to find out?
Sure they would, but would they care? probably. I passed well enough to be called a male in public, but whenever people care enough, like the Sturniolos fanbase, they will look for all my socials, and they’ll know.
A million thoughts ran through my head, but they were all cleared out once I heard Nick call my name again.
“Y/n? babe? you okay?” he asked, shaking my shoulder gently.
“hm? oh- yeah. sorry. i zoned out,” i chuckled a little. “could you repeat the question?” i asked, and nick complied.
The rest of the video went by pretty smoothly, since I was occupied with thinking deeply at all the odd questions Nick was asking us, and laughing at the out of pocket jokes from matt and chris.
We recorded for about an hour more, knowing that more than half of the footage would just be cut out in editing. Matt screeched into the camera, before shutting it off, and handing it to Nick, and starting the car.
Matt drove all of us to the triplets house, since I just stayed there often with them anyways. we walked inside, and Nick and I went up to his room to edit the video.
I caught myself giggling at the stupid jokes and the annoying bickering, but I cant lie, we’re pretty funny.
“this video has to be posted today,” Nick sighed, only a little bit into the editing. “I hate it when they wont film until the ‘night’ of. It’s 2:34 AM, and the video needs to be up by 4:30..” Nick sighed.
He looked over at me, noticing i was growing increasingly more tired.
“get some sleep, baby.” Nick smiled, kissing my forehead. I complied, before crawling into his bed, falling asleep there.
I woke up again, and it just so happened to be 5:00 PM, somehow. I always sleep throughout the whole day, so i wasn’t really surprised.
I yawned, before staying in Nick’s bed, allowing myself to wake up. I checked my phone, which normally has none to five notifications, but this time, i had well over a thousand.
My eyebrows furrowed; and i quickly shot up. I scrolled through the notifs, to see comments on my old instagram and tiktok posts,
“Awe! Nick’s boyfriend is so cute!”
|_ “replying to : @— ‘boyfriend? i thought nick was gay. this is disgusting.’”
“That’s gross. She changed her name and claimed to be a boy. Fucking gross. Grow up.”
|_ “replying to : @— ‘HE is a boy. He always has been, he just realized it, and is now brave enough to show it. let him be.’”
“Thats not even a boy💀”
“Nick could’ve done so much better and actually got himself a big strong MAN.”
“shes so ugly wth.”
“Nick needs to realize that he could do so much better than her. he needs to raise his standards because what the fuck.”
“guys, her name is y/d/n, not y/n!”
Each comment broke my heart. Sure, there were a few sweet ones, supporting nick and i, but the horrible degrading ones outweigh those by a long shot.
I felt my eyes start to water as i scrolled through the comments. I didn’t want to see them, but i couldn’t stop looking.
I felt the tears start to roll down my cheeks, as i looked through the comments.
I stopped looking through comments i was tagged in, and began looking through my instagram DM’s. Fuck. These were worse.
“kill yourself you stupid fag.”
“nick doesn’t want you, tranny.”
“kill yourself before i kill you.”
“don’t corrupt nick you disgusting freak.”
“i promise you, nick hates you.”
“why’d he pick you. he could’ve had me😂”
I let out small silent sobs, throwing my phone on the ground. I heard a pair of feet running up the stairs to Nick’s room, before the door flew open.
“shit- what happened? fuck, y/n, whats wrong?” Chris’ eyes widened as he saw the scene in front of him. My phone broken on the floor, and i was sobbing into my knees on Nick’s bed.
I nodded, and chris immediately ran by my side.
“he’s out with Matt- ill call him. im staying here with you until he gets here, okay?” he placed his hand on my back. he quickly pulled his phone out of his pocket, calling nick. i didnt understand what he said, because i wasn’t paying attention. i just need nick.
Nick. thats all i want. He’s all i need.
“hey.. please, talk to me.” Chris spoke softly, putting his phone back in his pocket. “what happened, buddy?” he asked, his eyebrows furrowing, his hand never leaving my back.
Thats when i realized, i wasn’t wearing my binder. Normally, not wearing my binder at my own house, or even the triplets, doesn’t bother me, but as i read through all those comments, calling me a girl, i couldn’t help but feel disappointed in myself.
I looked down at my chest, and started crying harder. I couldn’t breathe. fuck- i’m having a panic attack.
“n-nick- i- i need n-nick!” i gasped, quickly sitting up.
“hey- hey, it’s okay. Nicks almost here, okay? I need you to take deep breaths, okay?” Chris panicked. I panted, rocking back and fourth on nicks bed.
I knew Chris was trying to help, but i needed Nick.
We heard the door bust open, and nick and matt both ran up the stairs, to me and Chris.
“baby, my baby..” Nick’s eyebrows furrowed, as he rushed to my side. He pulled me into a hug, and looked at chris as he held me. “what happened, chris?” Nick asked, trying to raise his voice, knowing it would make things worse.
“I- i dont know! I heard a bang and crying- so, i ran up here and he was crying! he wouldnt tell me anything, besides he wanted you! i- i didnt know what to do so i called you!” Chris spoke worriedly.
I looked over at matt, his jaw clenched, as he fiddled with his own hands. his eyes glossy. Matt’s dealt with his own panic attacks, and seeing someone he cared about was probably hard for him.
“i- i-m sorry-“ i stuttered out to Matt, who had a worried expression plastered on his face. he didn’t say a word. I cant hurt matt, too.
“huh? baby, what are you sorry for?” nick asked me, pulling back slightly from the hug, to look me in the eyes.
“m-matt-“ i sobbed, and nicks head snapped towards matt, who’s chest was moving rapidly, his eyes wide.
“fuck, chris, get him out of here, please. go sit with him on the couch or something- calm him down. I got y/n,” nick gestured towards matt, and chris immediatly did as he was told.
“shh, baby. i’ve got you. You’re okay.” Nick whispered, pulling me into him. i focused on the heat radiating off of his body, his vanilla scent, and the way his soft hoodie felt on my skin. My sobs slightly subsided, and i could finally think straight again.
“My love.. i love you. so much. do you want to talk about it?” Nick offered, and placed a loving kiss on my forehead, as he brushed my hair out of my face.
“your f-fans.. they called me a girl..” i sniffled, and his gaze sofened, and he looked like he was about to cry.
“you are not a girl. you never have been, and never will be. you’re my boy.” Nick sighed, placing a soft kiss to my lips.
His boy.
I’m his boy.
I WASNT SURE IF THIS WAS A GOOD ENDING OR NOT BUT IDK I THOUGHT IT WAS CUTE.
writing the dms and comments BROKE me.
@bernardenjoyer @lovely-calypso
#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#fanfic#christopher sturniolo#fluff#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#angst
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ok funny thing id like to say about mp100 before i finished it. i genuinely thought s3 was gonna end in tsubomi being the most powerful esper / some kind of evil spirit.
i didnt realize that the conveyor belt rejection scene was just part of mp100s senseof humor i was like fully convinced tjere was some underlying crazy shit there. also tsubomi's anime girl aura in s1-2 vanishing in s3 i thought was because mob absorbed toichiros powers in s2 and became more powerful THEREFORE not being under tsubomis psychic influence.
also all the digs at being able to cloak ones aura. like how being able to hide your psychic aura/trace was something only incredibly powerful espers could do . the factthat mob never noticed tsubomi as an esper being that she always cloaked herself.
also tje scene with mezato in s3 where she goes up to mob and is like. why DO you like her? and he cant answer. i was like. OH MY GOD GUYSSS ITS BECAUSE SHE'S PSYCHICALLY INFLUENCING PEOPLE TO THINK SHES COOL AND AWESOME AS FUCK BUT FOR NO SPECIFIC REASON AND MOBS GONNA REALIZE IT. GUYS. GUYS!!!!!!!!!
/ALSO/ tsubomi getting bored with mobs powers being "wow another esper as powerful as me!" and then her powers surpass him without him noticing and shes like aight thats enough.
again this was everythng i thought before the actual s3 ending happened . which was bomb as fuck i wouldnt give it up for the world but i think tsubomi most powerful esper is a cool au idea i might expand on it cause i was like. GENUINELY fully convinced that was gonna happen. i usually peg endings pretty well but i was so off mark its hilarious. i thought we were gonna get a typical beating the epic supervillain we didnt know was there all along!!! ending like most animes (mp100 is actually the first anime ive watched so dont fucking trust me on this LOL) but i was sooooo so off the mark. and im glad i was. ok im done gn
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see now i'm wondering if his ring ID is the kind of person yi sang could have become if he didn't join limbus company. like he internalizes the thinking pattern of "i'm a fool and not worth a damn and everything i do only hurts people" and expresses that self-loathing via his art. eats drywall
OK SO. I TOOK SOME TIME TO ANSWER THIS ONE BECAUSE I WAS TRYING TO GET HIM FOR MYSELF. I don't even really play the game anymore and keep up with the story via YouTube but. Y'know just to prove a point basically and Virtual Yi Sang Collectionism while I find myself with too much free time again so you might have gotten to see it by yourself by now but. Still.
Actually looking into this with his story and all of his dialogue they really did just give him an actual Bad End ID like Nclair, Ahabmael and G Corp Gregor (with some variation of Erlking joining eventually? but I have no idea how that will work taking in count the plot aspect) since Spicebush Yi Sang doesn't really Qualify as one of those and is even framed as being empowering in a way for him taking in count its release was timed so it could be used in the Farmwatch fight instead of waiting for the end of the Season like the others. I believed that W Corp Yi Sang was this spiritually; since it depicts him at his lowest point imaginable following on the track he was on already and the themes of Canto IV perfectly though not related to it, but now Ring Yi Sang has shown us a much more connected, and much darker potential path for him. So I'll take this post as my chance to analyze this:
In regards to his self-loathing it's very interesting that he actually seems to feel a sense of pride not seen in any of his other IDs, talking about "what he deserves" and disregarding everything that doesn't cause him a reaction. He now uses creation itself as a way to fill the emptiness inside of him, while in the main story, Yi Sang's resolution was that his impulse to create was his way of connecting with others.
You can see that in these lines, where he has completely disregarded everything about life and other people, pretty much all of his dialogue revolves around wanting to create and he has only interest in what can inspire him, to the point he nonchalantly kills civilians for failing to make him feel that way.
I feel like this is even expressed in the Sins for this ID compared to base Yi Sang, the set-up is the exact same; S1 Gloom and S3 Sloth. However, the one that changes is S2. Regular Yi Sang has S2 Envy while Ring Yi Sang has S2 Lust. Added this to Ring Yi Sang's passives even being fueled by Lust as well while base Yi Sang's are fueled by Gloom. I take this as a representation that he has taken this Lust, an obsessive desire, as being what will drive him forward throwing away all the self-loathing and regret, with many of his lines calling the past meaningless.
Now I'll tackle his story and do a rundown on it while giving my observation, as it ellaborates into this and what his mindset is (and frankly, it's utterly fantastic). First of all, we get a unique, dissonant track that so far seems to have never been used in any other instance in the game to my knowledge.
Yi Sang's approach to his scientist position is very...unique, because he does so as an artist rather than more proper scientific people like for example Faust, Dongrang, Aseah and Gubo. People who simply want practical application and results, means to an end. Dongbaek seems to be the only person who shares this approach he has which is why their bond is treated as unique compared to the other League of Nine members. At his core, what fascinated Yi Sang so much about technology and sciences was simply the euphoria of discovery itself, finding new things. Which is tackled immediately when Ring Yi Sang's story begins as I am showing here.
With science, you never truly "create" anything, you go through right and wrong answers until finding something that works or causes some effect, he even says so himself in Canto IV. And he goes on to criticize his prior fascination with technology with this particular aspect in mind. Even more shockingly is that he calls the League of Nine's conferences a "waste of time" now, each of their creations predictable which could tie into him being a one-of-a-kind genius, which is also somewhat tackled in Dongrang's observation log. To him, everything else his friends made was child's play.
So instead, he looks towards what made him so fascinated with The Mirror in the first place, echoing this particular point he makes during his log for Dongbaek, both of them are driven to reach something abstract and inconcievable and ended up using technology as their path to that vague destination that can only be described in poetry.
And finally, he completely foresakes his past at the League. He even he believes he finally has his wings but calls them fabricated, and there is something obviously wrong with the entire thing on multiple levels. They are fabricated wings because he was guided to this conclusion by the hand of another, rather than the introspection throughout IV. His chapter title is "The Unchanging", and it's the only chapter where the trait assigned in the title to the focus Sinner is a positive; him staying true to himself and his ideals was the key, but he needed to actually move past his apathy and actually grasp them, but here he has completely changed beyond recognition. Turned arrogant, callous and utterly irrational, discarding all of his self-loathing by divorciating himself from the self that he hates, yet the Sloth—the apathy remains, instead of moving past it, fighting it back with his Lust in an endless cycle of dopamin chases while growing numb to everything else and even destroying it if it fails to satisfy that Lust so that it will, as shown as he kills failing students to take delight in their shock and agony.
But at the same time it frames that portrait of the League in his background art a completely different meaning. It is most likely that this portrait is a mockery of all of them, regarding the past and the life he lived until now including his past self with the same condescencion he does examinees that fail to impress him. Specially when you take in count how his own face is much more well-painted than the childish erratic strokes he assigns to the other, making them look ridiculous. But at the same time, Yeonsim is there under them, but flipped to its underside, he still held onto it but as far as we know it might be completely broken and only keeps it as part of his insulting work going by another of his idle chatter lines.
This dark inversion of Yi Sang's journey even before Limbus and Canto IV is also emphasized by Pointillism in particular being chosen as the subject for this ID, this was first pointed out by this Korean Twitter user (and fellow irl Yi Sang enjoyer going by the layout) in the original announcement for this ID:
Of course, this theme compliments Yi Sang's resolution in IV pretty well. He loved the League and grew to love Limbus because they were his resting place. I can't find any translation of Jochunjeommyo however, so I can only rely on summaries and posts put through machine translation. But from what I can summarize, the story is about an artist who can't find a place to breathe and simply exist due to the materialistic, capitalistic nature of the city he finds himself in, which fits pretty neatly with Yi Sang's story as a whole.
I'd also like to point out how a less overtly unhinged variation of this kind of development is shown in his Dieci ID story (which I wanted to make a post on for a while because it really feels like it was preliminary to this and not enough people talk about how messed up Dieci Yi Sang actually is) and how he comes to adopt a mentality just like Ryoshu's, with her already being linked to The Fingers and knowing about their workings personally to the point she might have been affiliated at some point though we cannot confirm, however I will instead link to this post by my friend on the topic since they already did a dissection on how Yi Sang and Ryoshu act as ideological foils and they pretty much said it better than I could: https://www.tumblr.com/ishcliff/743271628518129664/so-any-thoughts-of-well-the-blade-lineage-itself?source=share
So that's all I've got for now! Honestly I am so over the moon with this ID and the potential implications going forward as you can imagine.
#limbus company meta#limbus company analysis#project moon#limbus company#lcb Yi Sang#answers#I am back and I am announcing it with aggresive intent#hello people I am still very insane I was just busy schoolwork internships exam trips etc#still have some stuff to do but it's relaxed a lot#I am still insane though#lcb League of Nine
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Ok so the promised thoughts about Interview with the Vampire s2e5 (keep in mind that i haven't read the books, i've only seen some posts by people who have) SPOILERS
This episode was... heavy I guess is the right word. Pretty dark. Some things real fucked up. But also like emotionally.
I'll start with the nice thing, which is the Daniel and Louis dynamic; I really enjoy their present selfs, finding out their memories together. I like that Daniel even seems to be disappointed when Louis say that they didn't do anything lmao. Yeah and them in past is super fun too, at least at the start; Louis being happy with, Daniel "I did what I had to" Molloy taking of his shirt the moment he gets an excuse to do so.
It's interesting tho, the way Louis talks about Lestat has changed. But yeah, time passes and changes perspective (or maybe they have met after this sometimes and that changed it, but in that case i would have to ask where is lestat now)
And I think talking about the 70s takes immense trust on both parts, but especially Daniel's. I mean uncovering what he knows is risky, even without Armand in there.
Speaking of, I like that we get to hear how he likes to hunt; they tell us ("he's gonna be begging for it in an hour" or something like that) and show us with Daniel, that Armand likes his victims to be so mentally broken by him that they basically offer themselves up to him (similar to what Santiago does on stage)
Now that I've opened up Armand's behaviour, I'll talk a little about their fight. Like I get it. I get them both, Armand more than I thought I would. But fucking christ. They are both saying the hard truths (which i doubt is common in their relationship) and so it's spicy.
Louis bringing up Armand's past is fucked. But also Armand being so jealous of Lestat, like he's been their whole relationship; i like to see that, this seed of hatred and resentfulness that keeps hurting them even in present day.
And then Louis runs out and that is something i did not see coming and i feel so bad for him, like omg. And the way Armand acts towards him then feels really cruel but in the light of their fight i guess he gets to be angry (but i still dont like it)
Armand listening to the tapes and promptly torturing Daniel for four fucking days. Crazy. I mean yea this is "Torture as foreplay, the show" but still? Mental.
I wholeheartedly agree with "Fuck your boyfriend"
I'm not actually tho sure if he's torturing him for the fun of it or out of jeaulosy or if he actually wants to find out "what makes him fascinating" but still, jesus (He really said, you could be on your knees in a second and you WILL, lol)
The Lestat-Armand scene broke my heart. This means that they both know that Lestat is alive because Louis didn't look at all surprised that he is, only shocked that Armand knew where he was. So id like to know if he actually found out (when? how??) or if he just assumed.
Now, what is Armand trying to do here? If it's to hurt Louis, he's successful but it hurts me to think that's it. If it's actually to make Louis happy, than he's doing it all wrong, like Louis tells him like a million times to stop. If it's to show that he's better, or like to give Louis a choice and hope he's the chosen one, I mean I guess? Still don't get it tho.
I really like that he refuses to say the "I love you", because, well, I'm not sure about the intentions, but to me it shows that he is scared that Louis would leave him if he knew. Which is not an unfounded fear really, not from the point of view of someone who's been listening to the tapes and hearing Lestat, Lestat, Lestat... over and over again. I think that the tapes kinda confirm Armand's fears that he isn't "enough" for Louis and could never be enough because he just isn't Claudia and he just isn't Lestat.
And the talk after that scene, "he is just my maker" yea no we both know you're lying. But then they explain why Armand's acting kinda like a servant to Louis (because to be tired of cleaning messes, you would have to have cleaned a lot of messes), because he's trying to undo something that happened in Paris? (Claudia is in danger, i fear)
Speaking of Lestat, where is he?? I mean he doesn't know where Louis is and Armand refuses to tell him, but I don't think that's just it. Like, I'm pretty sure if he could, Lestat would burn the whole word to find Louis. So it might be that he's been locked up somewhere? (i have seen people who know the books talk about some dungeon i think?? but idk)
Next thing I find quite fascinating (haha) is the very confusing Loumand power dynamic. It mostly comes from Armand and the way he seems to have two conflicting personalities that he switches between; one of them is the "cold, dark, manipulative, always in power, will torture you mentally", you know like he was acting with Daniel for most of the episode, and then there is the "devoted servant, looking to please and get love, yes maitre, of course maitre" or as Louis calls it, very 'tactly' I might add, "the bitch he was groomed to become", (it is obviously a horrible thing to say, i mean come on, louis.)
And I'm not sure what causes him to switch, if it just happens inside him or if the change is somehow (intentionally or even unintentionally) caused by Louis. It also kinda reminds me of the way Lestat has the mental stability of a rocking horse, but instead of it being "Everything is fine -> Rage", it's "I'm in power -> I will do literally anything you say".
Also idk how Louis feels about this. Because he will certainly use this side of Armand to get what he wants, but I'm not all that sure that he necessarily enjoys that power. Whatever it is, he saved Daniel thanks to it so yeah, good.
The ending, i am a little scared about, i will admit. Not sure how fast Armand can figure out what they know, and when he does, if they will know that he knows that they know. Dubai scenes are gonna be fun is what im saying.
Lastly, the trailer. Looks great again, more Loumand scenes that will hopefully be healthier than whatever this was. I am scared for Claudia as per Armand's "Have I atoned for my part of Paris?" i think the girl is done for. Also Santiago clearly play part in that, i've seen some people talk about a court?? and it looks like he's gonna do just that, probably court for Claudia and Louis (and possibly Armand?)
This didn't fit anywhere, but this episode somehow made me like Armand more? Not as a person, but as a character. I was always team Lestat and it might be because he was there first and i tend to be biased towards that, but maybe it's the fact that he was just more fun to watch. Like both his "normal" and his "fucked up". Armand was really cool too, but his "normal" i just didn't enjoy as much. But his "fucked up" was horrifying and also totally fascinating to watch so now i like him a little more than before (lestat still remains above him tho, idk what to tell you)
So anyways I hope you enjoyed my rant. I will happily read any responses also I might add to this if I remember something later.
#interview with the vampire#iwtv#iwtv s2#iwtv spoilers#louis de pointe du lac#armand#lestat de lioncunt#loustat#loumand#iwtv s2 ep5#daniel molloy
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ice rinks tragedy, gojo satoru
what if gojo fell in love with an old friend he casually met at the ice skating rink? gs x femreader gojos POV.
"i just want a girl that loves me, you know?" i say, sulking in evidencial sorrow. geto laughs, nudging me. "we will both get it one day, ya' just gotta wait, gojo. and besides you got the looks, and uh, personality too, i guess-"
"-maaaan shutup. my personality is charming too, right?" i inturrupt, evidently embarrassed. "i was gonna say that, duh." geto replied, eye rolling. we both laugh, walking to the ice skating rink i begged we go. it's been so long since we hung out like this, and i was pleased that we did.
"i forgot my socks.." geto said, irritated. i sigh, as we walk back to the counter where they had the socks.
"hi, i just need so—"
"(y/n)? that you?" i say, shock written all over my face. "?? TORU???SATORU???" she says, almost as everyone could hear her from the blasting music. "what are you doing here? oh my god wait i haven't seen your ass in YEARS!!" she squealed, coming over to hug me.
"i don't know.. to maybe.. ice skate?" i reply, joking around. she tuts, rolling her eyes. "shut it. anyways, ive missed you so much! id never know i'd see you, oh and yes i do work here." she said, eyes gleaming.
she's still as pretty as when i last saw her. despite not looking any different, she looked really stunning. "you work here? oh that's nice. i thought you moved out to a different city?" i ask, confusion written.
"yeah i did. but i really do miss being here so i saved up to come back and i just got a job so i can be financially ok. but how about you? how's life going?" she said. i could just notice the minor wrinkles on her face move whenever she spoke, or the sparkle in her eyes. even how she presented herself.
she was so beautiful.
"earth to.. gojo? she's talking to ya" geto said, as he starts laugh seeing me look at her. i was in love.
but she was oblivious to shit like that so im good. "what you say again?"
"i asked how u were."
"im.. im happy.. im so happy right now."
she giggles, confusion written on her face. "why's that?" she asks, arms resting besides the counter. "it's just—"
"he's happy to be here. let's go, we have limited time here!" geto interrupts, annoyed. "oh you guys are fine. you can stay all day ..it's on me." she spoke, smiling. i continue staring at her with nothing but love and adoration in my eyes. "thank you, (y/n)? is that your name?" geto said. she nodded, walking back to the counter she was at.
"i'll let you guys have your fun, bye!"
i couldn't stop staring at her, and i swore i nearly cried. she's so pretty i nearly cried.
"gojo.. be civilised, ain't she just an old friend?"
"my wife, actually." i followed him along. geto laughs, i don't know why but he does. i roll my eyes. i wasn't lying. i wanted her to be my wife.
—turns out she had a boyfriend the entire time.
"dude just let it rest, with a girl as pretty as her, it was quite clear she probably had a significant other." "so? i should've been her signature shit whatever shit you just said" i say, frowning. he sighs, passing me the controller.
"let's just play cod and forget about this, ok?" geto said, switching on the console.
whatever.
#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#jjk satoru#satorugojo#gojo smut#jujutsu gojo#jjk gojo#jujutsu kaisen#satoru gojo#geto suguru#cute#y/n#gojo x y/n#gojo x you#jujutsu geto#jujutsu sorcerer#jujutsu nanami#jjk#gojo smau#gojo saturo
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"# i think If you want a genuine critique of Batman then Leslie and her pacifism is far more interesting"
So true. Unfortunately nobody's been writing her well since the 90s or '00s. At least, I didn't come across anything featuring her in a well thought out way.
I'm split on counting War Games because 'she would not fucking do that' as people say. However, it is her position on morality taken to the twisted extreme. Still, intentionally killing or faking it, is very emotionally hurtful, like trauma inducing hurtful. Both for Steph and the Batfam and her mother.
Looked up the exact definition of pacifism and, well:
"Pacifism is a policy or doctrine of rejecting war and violence in solving disputes"
She kinda did use violence (emotional and body violating and zero consent from removing Steph from her life) to solve a dispute. Or to "free" Steph of her bat-duties, but it still counts.
Would love for Leslie to go after other batfam members and not just Bruce and argue with them about their methods.
Actually i think Stephanies death, either by medical negligence or a failure of her support system, is a natural consequence of Leslies brand of pacifism and while “She, personally, might not fucking do that” her philosophy might so its not as ooc as id like it to be.
So to discuss Leslie i think i have to establish two things 1. She suffers from being a (mostly) anti Batman character in a Batman comic* and
2. She and Jason are actually on two ends of a spectrum, with Leslie being “it is better to be the victim of violence then the perpetrator of it” and Jason being “it is better to enact unspeakable violence then be the victim of it”. With Bruce in the middle like “can we please get some nuance in here can we please get some fucking nuance” which is. Very funny actually.
(Its funny because Bruce, by being Batman, has basically decided to become the nuance - he will be violent for you, and by being so good at violence he can minimize the amount of actual violence needed)
So by letting Steph die, Leslie is essentially saying “no amount of violence can save us, isnt it better to die then without having inflicted it upon others?” Which is so very Ghandi of her, but also fucking insane and yeah Bruce was 100% right to never trust her again after that.
She is also - ok so the thing is, in-universe, being a teenage vigilante is. It’s basically like being a dance kid. Its going to have a profound and everlasting effect on the kids mental and physical health, there are side effects we still don’t entirely understand, but for the most part its just. Something some kids do!! Some of them insist on doing it (dick, damian (<-i have thoughts about why Bruce didnt want to give Damian robin ok) some of them realize it isnt good for them but cant really give it up (jason, maybe tim?) some of them are in it just for their stage moms (cissie king-jones) and some of them suffer long term consequences due to insufficient parental supervision (kon, pre-nu52) etc etc. Leslie is the mom in the corner who thinks allowing her kid to perform or even learn ballet in a studio is a slippery slide to abuse. She thinks no kid should ever be in that environment, and by Bruce allowing Dick to do so, despite Bruces reluctance in the matter and almost oppressive supervision, he has doomed an entire generation of kids.
She is never going to criticize anyone else in the batfam, because to do so would be admitting that kids have agency beyond what adults believe is best for them, and admitting that means being unable to push her “correct” views upon them.
Leslie is actually a pretty good stand in for fandom in that way; refuses to allow anyone but Bruce agency and independent thought, refuses to place blame anywhere but Bruce, insists a difference of opinion is grounds for dismissal of personhood and respect, and believes Gotham would be better off if Batman never existed.
(Once again i have no idea if i answered your question/addressed your ask. Sorry)
#asks#leslie as the real world stand in actually works really well#i do have to clarify that i like her!! irl i would probably agree with her#but this is a power fantasy not irl
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Heyaaaa, I saw a yandere Genshin blog that writes for ladies and I know what I must do!
Could I see what Yandere Yoimiya's like? Perhaps general headcanons as to how she acts once she's in a relationship with her beloved?? TYSM, I'd love to see what you make of this!!
:3 no real intro cuz im really tired, sry
prob ooc yoimiya, but like extra ooc cuz im too tired to think straight
i wrote most of this at 1 am and the rest in math class
i feel like she would be a very soft yandere, yk not hurting her darling or not even wanting to kidnap (but she would if she thought that you would be more safe like that, will hate so much herself if she ever hurt you)
ofc like any other yandere she would kill for you, but it wont be for dumb reasons like some dude looked at you for 0.1 second, no,
but it'll be more if you really hated your boss or someone dared actually hurt you or say something that really broke you
she is really gentle and sweet, plus she loves to make you new fireworks and just gifts you a lot of things in general, even if you're "just friends"
"[y/n]! there you are, i brought you some of my new fireworks!" she yelled as she ran up to you, her eyes glued to your figure ignoring anything else around her in the process.
"look, arent they going to be pretty!" she said as she showed you her concept drawing for the fireworks, and ided they were pretty, and going to be even prettier when in lit up in the sky
"im sure they are, yoimiya" your smile was so sweet and looked so lovely on you, you were the only thing going trough her mind as she got lost in your eyes.. "uhm yoimiya, you ok?
"h-huh?! o-oh yeah love, uh i mean [y-y/n] i-im fine, uhm, would you uuhh like to see the f-fireworks in action?" her face was so warm it felt like she was burning more then that guy would be right now, what stupid idea he had, he should've never even thought about touching you then she wouldnt be so late to seeing you today and- "yeah of course i want to see the fireworks you made!"her thoguh got cut off with your voice, that beautiful voice...
and also acts like you're the litteral reason she is alive (you are), so if she ever hurt you if even by a tiny scratch she would actually just die inside, and look like she died on the outside
yoimiya
she is really supportive of whatever you do, and if you have like a fashion brand or something it would be the only thing she is willing to wear, or if you work at restaurant she would eat there everytime you have a shift
she would definitely bring you flowers on random occasions and just say it wasnt because of anything special or anything, but it was just because she missed you and really needed to see you or she would've mentally destroyed herself not knowing if you were ok or not
"h-hi, i uhm brought you flowers! y-yeah, flowers i hope you like them i picked them myself" she said giving you a beautiful and big bouquet of your favorite flower, wait did you ever tell her what your favorite flower is?? you dont think so, but you guess it doesnt matter right now, maybe you just forgot you told her (you never told her your favorite flower, yet she knows the exact shade of that flower you like the most).
"awww thank you, yoimiya! i love them!!" you said as you held them close to youer chest, she really wishes she were those flowers right now, all close you. she looked up at your lips, getting cought in the thought of how soft they look and how she so wanted to kiss y-
"y-your w-welcome, i-i just thought t-that you were so pretty that you c-could use some flowers- what! n-no no i-i mean you i uhhh i-i have to go n-now yeah, i-i'll see you l-later" she panicked, what was she saying and in front of you too no no no, what if you thought she was weird now, or what if she went too fast and too far...
"o-oh ok, have a nice day yoimiya! thank you again for the flowers" you waved goodbye with one hand and had the flowers in the other, wondering why she seemed to be running out to the middle of nowhere. she talked so fast you didnt even hear what she said other than a few words which were "you were so pretty", and they left a blush behind that certainly would go away for a few hours or so.
if you lived far away, like not even in inazuma, she would send so many letters to you, even if you didnt know who she was as she just saw you while on the road once and fell so badly in love, its fine you're going to fall for her sooner or later
she would also visit you again and again but that costs a lot of money so she tries to convince you to move in with her, but if thta doesnt work she might actually get frustrated and just drug you and then take you home herself
with that idea still in mind, if she met you while in sumeru and you were a student she still doesnt want to interfere with the things you love (though save some of that love for her pls) so she wouldnt kidnap you but would wait patiently for as long as you need, or promise to take you out to study the things in inazuma instead (she would murder your professer if they said no and that you should stay in the akademiya, abselutely)
"how are you doing this week? i know i send you a lot of letters but i just had to when i found out where you lived so i didnt have to travel so much as it costs quite a bit. but its worth it if it means i can see you every so often, as you are slowly becoming the reason i exist, i would love to hear about everything you have done in your life, big or small. please think about visiting inazuma soon, i would love to show you around all the different regions, shops and more. i also learned what proper love is now because of you, and i think it indeed is you, as i cant find anything that i love and adore more than you.
i also picked some fireworks out for you, they are from my personal collection and are very pretty, just like you, i would love to get your feedback on them and would happily make you a thousand more if you want me to. i will also make different ones if you get bored of the ones youcurrently have
please keep yourself safe
Your Love-Yoimiya"
attached to the letter is a few too many fireworks, and some inazuman snacks and accessories too, she doesnt seem to be very wealthy yet has bought you what looks like a diamond necklace and a very pretty ring.
would absolutely cook you meals throughout the day, she'll cook you anything you want for breakfast, lunch, and dinner but she also makes sure you're healthy and checks in on you every few hours to make sure you drink enough too
if you're really depressed, she would make sure you had your meds for it and stuff, would also hand feed you everything. she calls it that because she hates using the word force but yes, she forces you to eat and will not take no for an answer
almost killed your doctor when the meds stop working, but then found out later that its completly normal and its not the doctor trying to kill you (you saved a life that day, multible even)
*knock knock* "oh, my love, i found you! here's your lunch for the day, i used some of the leftovers from yesterday, i really hope you like. oh i also got you your favorite snack right here, and then remember to drink your water too." she left with a kiss to your cheek and blew you an extra kiss before closing the door to your room again.
she wasnt lying when she said you would fall inlove with her at soem point, as you were certainly beginning to fall down deep in the hole that is Yoimiya.
she loves to hug you when around you in general, but loves to kiss you cheek when she feels like you've been away from her for too long. would never actually kiss your lips, altough she wants to, you have to give her permission first and then she might if she still has the confidence
she becomes a literal puddle when you just as much as touch her cheek, yes she has to touch you every second you are near her, but its different when its you doing anything!!!
she thinks you're a god, and in her eyes you are, doesnt matter how ugly you think you are or how weak you actually are. she will worship you so much you would think every 'imperfection' you have is prettier than ever.
she looked into your eyes as she lays in your lap, the sky is pretty, and that was what she thought she would be looking at the whole time, but it seems she made other plans. your eyes are just too captivating, too pretty, and too- her thoughts cut off as she felt your hand play with her loose hair, as she had put it down just as you started to ask her the question.
your hands were soft, and felt nice in her hair. she could lay here forever if it meant you were going to be here and stroke her hair like this, she's sure her pops wouldn't mind if she feel asleep for just a little longer, and she definitely could when she is laying on her darling.
"yoimiya? oh, you're awake, how as your na-" "you look divine" she cut you off as she just stared up at you like you were the god of beauty, like you were the god of her heart, and maybe you were, but to her it wasnt even a maybe. "y-you think so? dont i just look messy? or ugly? i dont think i even brushed my hair today" she looked up at you with a questioning look in her eyes
"no how dare you even think that, you look divine, beautiful, pretty, majestic, lovely, attractive, god-like, charming-" she stopped when you held a hand over her mouth, she wanted to kiss it so badly... "ok ok, i-i get it, i look pretty to you" your face was red, really red, and it looked cute she thinks, very cute indeed. she should make you blush more often so she can see more of your beauty that is only for her too see.
she had an even bigger smile on for the next week and no one knew why, but she normally smiles a lot so they didnt question her. though she would have happily answered with a long rant about you.
when you two actually started dating she would have a constant blush on her face for the next month or smt, she just cant believe you would actually date her, i mean you were just so perfect in every way, and then theres her what do you even see in her, do you even see anything in her?
but its fine if you dont, she wont let you leave anyway, she cant lose you not now, not ever. you are hers and hers alone, and you know she will make sure it stays that way, even if it costs her verything else. you will be hers, and she will be yours.
i uhh didnt just give you general headcanos heh, your welcome??? wtf is going on with me rn
im so single that being kidnapped by a hot person doesnt sound bad at all, like take me PLEASE... *cough cough* thank u for reading pls kidnap me, luv ya-Masterlist
You are welcome to reblog and like any of my posts, but you CAN NOT translate, copy or hate on anybody for liking my posts
#noelle´s maiden#gn reader#genshin x reader#genshin impact#yoimiya x reader#yandere#yandere yoimiya#yoimiya#i went wild wtf#pls someone kidnap me#i wish i was joking
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so bizarre to me when people give fiona a redemption arc like making her evil wasnt literally like the fundamental core of making her an actually interesting character. like . ok actually i was mostly planning on just leaving the post as this but im going to make a proper post whining about this because ive seen it far too often for my liking.
it appears to me that a lot of people do this because they dislike fiona/scourge which is like. sure i get it. but you could literally just... break them up . and have her continue being awful on her own. like scourge is not the reason she switched sides and i find the idea. 1) a bit misogynistic frankly but thats more of a personal gripe than anything else like god forbid a woman make bad choices of her own volition and not because a man forced her hand into doing it (YES i am aware that abuse makes this more complicated than that but also we .... already have a relationship in archie sonic that fits this exact bill. yes it wasnt written well but the wonder of fan works is that you can always make it better. so why are we repeating it again 1:1) and 2) demeaning to the point of her character.
like. ok. lets go over the facts real quick. as a kid fiona got put in robotnik's salt mines and got accidentally left behind bc sonic & co couldnt find her. she realized that nobody was going make the effort to go save her, so she dug herself out and started life on the run as a treasure hunter/thief. she didnt ever really accept the fact that sonic and mighty not saving her wasnt really their fault, and even after becoming a freedom fighter, nobody ever said anything or apologized or said "hey wow that kind of sucks you went through all that". she never really made any actual friends within the ff or formed any meaningful bonds. she starts dating sonic, but its pretty clear that the only reason they're dating is that she's his rebound post The Slap. the moment her history with bean & bark came up - after she used that knowledge to save everybody - sally immediately turns on her and sonic is the only person to try to stick up for her. as bark and bean leave, bean also insinuates that fiona isnt really a freedom fighter, and that she's still basically one of them.
fiona is a "bad" trauma survivor. when i say "bad" i mean in opposition to the ideal tumblr trauma survivor - the sad poor uwu bean whose trauma only inclines them hurt themselves and they become more sympathetic kind etc. as a result. fiona, on the other hand, blames sonic (whose fault this is, frankly, not) for her experiences, and becomes more jaded and mean. she has no real support system and people repeatedly tell her that she hasnt changed and that she wont change and she cant change. shes already got all this baggage by the time her relationship with scourge starts carrying actual weight - he's offering her a way out. if none of them are ever going to really accept her being "good", then she might as well just give into her worst impulses and join hands with scourge, who, notably, has no stake in this - he doesnt have any obligation to be her friend like the freedom fighters, and more than that he likes her specifically because of the part of her that everybody else hates. the important part here is that he encouraged her to switch sides, he didnt make her switch sides.
id say fiona's character in a writing sense is an exploration of the failings of the freedom fighters to support a trauma victim, and how those failings, while unintentional, lead that victim to specifically turn against them. she says "ok actually screw all of you guys" and gives up on trying to be good because nobody ever gave her any real encouragement and decides to put herself on a path of self-destructive revenge and inflicting her misery onto the general population. we can also recall at this point that this motivation is entirely removed from scourge and you can literally break them up and still keep her evil.
the other important point here is that she purposefully chose that path of turning evil as opposed to leaving the freedom fighters or going somewhere else or like literally doing anything else. she literally could have just left but she did not and thats what makes her Interesting. prompted by her unhealed trauma and personal baggage she made those bad choices for herself, and frankly i cannot for the life of me understand why people think that walking back that character development (and yes i mean character development. character development can also mean getting worse) for ..... what. snarky but with a heart of gold generic protagonist girl? come on guys
#besides what happened to not having enough female villains smh#archie sonic#fiona fox#iratusmus.txt
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Ok so this is actually 100% ripped of from this post
But I just changed it around a bit and wanted to put my spin on it :) this takes place season 5 but let’s pretend Troy never left. I know it’s cringe and bad I can’t write and sorry it’s so long
Setting- Pretty much the same, the Dean rented out a venue for a dance only this time it’s a valentine dance however on a “coincidence” they get stuck with said bisexual lighting that Abed will make his comment on
Background/ cold open- of course no dance at Greendale would be complete without alternative motives, this one being the Dean trying to get Jeff as his date to said dance (I don’t ship them but I think the Dean liking him is funny). To go along with this plot you aren’t let into the dance without a date, the Dean makes sure to make it clear it doesn’t have to be a real date (cue aggressive cueing to Jeff) In the end Jeff and Britta and up being each others fake dates seeing as they hadn’t been spending but time together, leaving Troy, Abed, and Annie (Shirley isn’t going)
A plot- Troy instinctively turns to Abed pitching to go as fake dates, seeing as they did nearly everything together and it’s not like either of them had a girlfriend. To this Abed would agree although he’d say something along the lines of “or maybe we could try and get dates, I mean spending time with you is great but we’ve been going to school here for 5 seasons with not end in sight, we may as well try to get girlfriends considering neither of us have had a real relationship” (cue offended gasp from britta). This makes Troy upset for whatever reason, he knows Abed is right but he’d rather just go with Abed then bother finding a date, with this he turns to his next best option, Annie, who is more then enthusiastic to go with him despite being over him she’s still gitty. Abed ends up going with Rachel, this once again makes Troy feel certain way but he still can’t put his thumb on it, Annie immediately notices something’s up and brings up the idea that it has something to do with Abed. Troy would say something along the lines of, “I really don’t know, I think your great and I should be estatic to have a date with someone a good as you but I can’t stop thinking about him, like how could he pull her this easy and get along with her so good, I’ve never even heard of this girl”. At this point Troy is completely detached from his “date” with Annie and is now ranting about how there’s no way Rachel is better then him or good enough for Abed while Annie just stares at him knowingly. Of course with Annie’s help Troy comes to the realization that even id he can’t put his finger ong why he wants to be with Abed, whether platonicly or romantically he wants to be with him. The night goes on like this, Troy occasionally going over to talk to Rachel about Abed before sulking back to Annie. Over the course of the night and talking to Rachel Troy gets increasingly mad that Abed doesn’t seem to care until the point on him storiming up to Rachel and airing out shit about abed (he’s controlling, trackers in his friends, uses people) and so on until Abed comes up on them and Rachel tells Abed something and storms out, leaving Abed to turn to Troy distraught. He’s says something about how he really liked her and Troy confesses that even if he doesn’t know want it is he’s drawn to Abed and wants to spend the rest of his life with him, he doesn’t want to be boyfriends or anything it he doesn’t want to see Abed leave him, Abed would say something along the lines of, “I don’t know how to take this but if there’s anyone I’d want to spend the rest of my life with it’s you, and we can make out own thing up it’s what we do anyway” more emotional dialog that I’m not smart enough to write but it ends in them kissing to bisexual lighting glaring around them and the song Somewhere Out There playing in the background
B plot- Jeff and Britta end up going to the dance together, I don’t have much to say here but it ends up it them saying how they’ve missed spending time together (I ship them in a they keep getting divorced and getting back together way) but they end up having a good time together. Also Jeff finds the Dean sulking and they end up sharing a dance together
C plot- not much here but I think it would be funny to have Chang and Duncan trying to pick if ladies to go to the dance but they end up wasting all there time with no ladies wanting them (just some funny bar scenes idk)
Ending scene- Troy and Abed telling people they’re dating of course with “Troy and Abed are dAtInG” a shocked gasp from Shirley and Annie (Annie knew) and britta giving Jeff twenty dollars for losing the bet of wether they’d get together
#sorry it’s so long#and so shittily written#community tv#abed nadir#troy barnes#trobed#annie edison#jeff winger#britta perry#jeffbritta#ben chang#ian duncan
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not a vent but diabetic shit because why not I want to share my experience
I have diabetes. I've had diabetes sense i was an elementary schooler on the way to middle school. Diabetes fucking sucks and it runs in my family. Because of this, and the fact that my family refuses to call it a disability despite it literally being a chronic illness, it has taken me a while to realize I do infact have a disability.
in hindsight, I am "lucky" that my mom raised me restricting lots of "unhealthy snacks" (non health foods. My mom viewed fucking cheezits as unhealthy and she came from a family that was even stricter with 'healthy' foods.) This meant that when I got diagnosed with diabetes, I would be prepared for the fact that now they weren't just rare treats my mom was learning to be ok with. Now they were aparently dangerous to my health and I could almost never eat them again.
My uncle has severe type 1 diabetes and my mom used to try to help him manage it, but he's a grown man whos never taken good care of it and does what he wants. So now that I had diabetes she was going to are sure I definitely didn't end up like that. This means that even if he himself brought all the kids a sweet treat, depending on my blood sugar I wouldn't even be allowed to have it. Most of the time she didn't want me to have it. This all went down with covid and I got to live with my diabetic father. The plus side was that the restrictions where pretty much gone, and I just needed to manage my sugar. The bad part is that I was fucking terrified of pricking my finger. It would take me hours to pick my finger, and my dad would be pissed. It slowly became very normal. I also had to learn how to take pills and open a pill bottle.
A while later now that I'm living with my whole family, I still have great care over my diabetes. I say great care as in how my family views it. I have the best a1c, I have the most consistent blood sugars. Personally I'm happy I can do that while having major depression but it makes me sad at the same time. It just pisses me off. Anytime my sugar is high I'm asked "what did you eat? What did you eat today? What was your sugar this morning?" I have an anxiety disorder. The doctors and google have told us that stress and anxiety can heighten blood sugar. Every time its about what I at. If im super sleepy? What did I eat? Whats my blood sugar? If im super anxious? Whats my blood sugar? Is it low? What have you eaten today?
My mom has always been focused on my diabetes. I low key hate it.
But in hindsight some of her ideas and things she let me do were so bad that its actually funny. Like holy shit mom, that was wild.
She at first wanted me to count all of my carbs. Every time I ate. All the carbs. She wanted me to check my sugar everytime I ate and then based on that it would determine what I was allowed to eat.
Then there was the point in time where she let me run around outside all day without eating lunch and sometimes even breakfast or any water until my sugar dropped crazy low and I was dizzy and shaking, and then id go outside again right after it went up. She doesn't like me reminding her of this because she says it makes her feel like a bad mother and that she was distracted. Im pretty sure the only constant meal was eating was dinner.
one time during Easter when we did an egg hunt my siblings got eggs fully of candy like normal. But my mom was running late on candy shopping so instead of giving me candy eggs, she made me get the special eggs she made, thinking they had zero sugar candy. They were fuckkng almonds. Unsalted Almonds. What. The. Fuck. I have never let her live that shit down, because who gives their kid fucking almonds as a treat??? Diabetic or not, unsalted almonds???
I was very very upset that year to say the least. My mom has always been stingy with any candy of any sorts. Even before we knew I was diabetic I was only really allowed 1-3 prices of candy from a holiday at most, and only after dinner. My Halloween candy especially would either go bad or she would eat it as well and I would not get much of it.
And after diabetes? Keto everything. My mom wanted to find as much keto stuff as possible, and I get it. We have a diabetic household, but she didn't do that shit until I got diagnosed with diabetes. I am happy that by now shes pretty much stopped all her restrictions and the keto stuff, she's still really diabetes focused when it comes to my mood and doesn't consider it a disability but that's okish.
Hilariously j don't have type 1 diabetes. Or type 2. I have a genetic mutation, and have had to convince multiple people that no I don't just have type 2, no I didn't not get diabetes because of my eating habits have you fucking seen me I am a god damm stick and even if I was fat that doesn't mean shit, no I cannot just eat fruit instead of candy that's not how diabetes works you peice of shit.
Long story short, i don't get a CGM or an Insulin pump. I actually make too much insulin, and dont really absorb it all and a CGM is to expensive... that means I just have to watch my sugar and take my pills indefinitely and I can't check my sugar too much because then I'd have to wait for my refills to get done because American health care fucking sucks ass.
lol diabetes sucks, stop being assholes to people with diabetes.
#diabetes#actually diabetic#chronic illness#Maybe there's some ablisim?#diabetic#diabetes management#diabetes care#how do i tag this#Its this a vent post? Not sure#idk what im doing#idk what to tag this as
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