#ibuprofen my long lost love

[smirnoffswitchblade]

hamburger 101% i cant swallow the hotdogs

[mediapen]

good morning Em i hope you are having a good day and 💌💌💌💌💌💌💌 as well as you're the best 🤎

hello bea! unfortunately my day has been Suck but i hope your day will be better!!! aren't timezones crazy!!!!! good morning good morning 🌅 🫶

[justjensenanddean]

Jensen Ackles | Purgatory Con, Düsseldorf, Germany, May 26, 2024, Panel Summary

Most creepy or annoying toy the kids ever had? Slime. It creeps him out. He has it all over his house now. He doesn’t like the texture or feel. But his kids love it. Creepiest? Danneel has an old antique doll. It is old cracked, has creepy eyes and is the devil. (x)

Demon Dean or Soldier Boy, who‘s more powerful? Demon Dean because SB has a traumatized little boy in him and demon Dean is just empty. He‘s more dangerous because he just doesn’t care. (x)

Funniest moment from set of The Boys? Someone yells Herogasm so Jensen says it was probably not the funniest moment but when he arrived on day 3 of the set, Jack Quaid asked if he‘s been on set yet and when it was a no, he said „whoo, good luck“ (x)

People kept mistaking the bottles of lube and the bottles of hand sanitizer. Jensen was not prepared for when filming started and everyone took their robes off. Jensen was not prepared. (x)

Jensen couldn’t not look. They called cut. Jensen was like „I‘m sorry, there’s 4 people over here doing a position I have never seen before.“ His shower was extra long that evening. „There may have been tears.“ (x)

“There’s four people over here in a position I have not seen before!!!” “My shower lasted extra long that evening. And there were tears.” Jensen retelling stories from Herogasm set on #TheBoys (x)

How long did it take him to learn the Arabic phrase for s14? Not long, he can parrot things quite easily. He just needs to hear it a few times, then he can repeat the sounds. It‘s how he learns accents. Tap dance worked like it too. If he can see or hear it, he can emulate it. (x)

Jensen: “I don’t think Cas’s confession is something that needs to be resolved. There is nothing to resolve. He said what he needed to say, it was a long time coming, it was heartfelt and beautiful. But there’s nothing to resolve.” (x) “Dean took it in and then lost one of his closest allies and friends. The accepting of that happened when Dean sat on the floor. He lost one of his brothers in arms and one of his closest people. When they come back, it’s just understood.” (x)

Are there situations where he accidentally or on purpose bring out Dean? Yes. Sometimes he thinks „it would be great to be Dean Winchester right now. He could have handled this.“ Dean is alive in him and comes out from time to time. (x)

Were there fake tears on SPN or did he ever cry? He wasn’t classically trained, so the emotion we see is real. He doesn’t know how to fake it. Compares it to a book or movie making you emotional. You know it’s not real, but it still gets you. (x)

After the s4 scene when Dean confesses to Sam about his 40 years and torturing in hell, he had to walk away because his body didn’t know it was fake. The barn scene was probably the most real, but for different reasons. He was saying goodbye to Dean, Jared, the crew. (x)

Crew members had to leave set because they were crying too. They were trying to dial it down, because it was too much emotion. (x)

When things get too serious? Laughter. It‘s his levee. When things get too heavy, he makes a joke to ease the situation. (x)

„Do you use Jared‘s conditioner?“ No he does not. That’s just what his hair does. (x)

Who inspires you? Jensen doesn’t idolize anyone, but he has a lot of respect for certain people and tries to absorb as much as he can when he meets them. Could be a brilliant scientist, an artist, an actor. (x)

Being cold on set? There was a scene with Bobby where they looked at a map over the hood of the car. Jensen told Bob Singer that it was ridiculous because they would look at the map in their car. But Bob wanted a specific job and told him to just get it done. (x) A few days after he got lasic surgery, he was supposed to wear sunglasses all the time. But he had to film in the sun with light shining in his face. Jensen was in so much pain that Serge covered the white surfaces in black. Didn’t help much. He took ibuprofen and powered through (x)

Dead in the Water when he had to hold the kid up and the diver pulled him under, it was the most eery feeling. He was terrified for the kid. But the kid actor had fun. / End of panel. (x)

(JMacLean)

[lefarte]

How would they take care of a sick friend?

Characters: Levi, Olivia, Daan, Pav

Some of these could be read as platonic

A/N: This is… entirely self indulgent because I myself am sick….😭 but also hey hii hello. This was very comforting for me. No one requested it, but I actually wrote this a long time ago in my notepad app before I even made this blog. I learned a lot about writing in this time so I’m sorry if the quality is a bit worse.

TWS: sickness (obviously)

Levi

Levi has been through this before. He’s been sick more times in his life than he’s been healthy at this point. He knows what to do. He talks you through it slowly and precisely, he holds you hair back when you throw up, he changes your blankets when they get covered in sweat… he would never make you feel gross or ashamed, no matter how bad it gets.

That said, his personality isn’t going to completely flip on itself just because you’re sick. He wants to help you, but he is naturally timid. It might be awkward for a while. He struggles to carry a conversation at the best of times. Much less when you are in so much pain…

And depending on how feverish you are, it might be scary to fall in and out of sleep and see him staring at you from across the room with his big ass eyes. (It’s not his fault, he’s just worried.)

I also imagine he’s the type of guy who gets sick when he sees other people sick. So he’ll be holding back his own nausea for until you’re asleep, or until you’re back on your feet. Until then he would be on high alert, even more vigilant than usual. If an enemy made it inside while you were vulnerable, he would never forgive himself. So he’d pull out all the stops, barricading the doors, covering the windows… (even if it’s not necessary and you’re in a safe place, like the train.)

Hope you don’t plan on going anywhere once you get up because he’s going to get sick too now 💔

—

Olivia

She’s going to be all over you. Of course she doesn’t want to be overbearing, but she really doesn’t want to see her friend in pain! And she can’t wait to impress you with her knowledge of botany. She has something for every symptom, an oil or lotion or extract. If she doesn’t have it, she will track it down!

She really loves the feeling of you depending on her. This is a rare opportunity for her to prove her skills to you, and to herself. And there is no one better to understand your pain than her! She knows the feeling of being trapped in bed rest, antsy and lonely, better than anyone else.

Olivia is determined not to let you feel that way. She cares about you. She wants you to get better! If you refuse her advice or try to pretend like you’re not sick, she will be dejected.

She will try to take you outside to look at the flowers and get some sunshine, and she explains every flower in detail. (She would be happy to do that anyway.) She even brings you little bugs, and if she’s lucky, a frog or a lizard!

Will share her comfort items with you. She has weighted blankets, lots of medicine, and heat pads!

She reads books to you, and her voice is so beautiful you’ll fall asleep.

—

Daan

He lowkey feels guilty for failing to take care of you

After everything he lost, you’re his treasure! He would give you the best bedside care you’ve ever imagined, you’d never want for anything. All the stops, backrubs, cuddles, cleaning your forehead with rags. He would even pull out some tricks from his old butler days and make you some yummy soup.

If you look at him with big sad eyes or god forbid he sees a single tear, he’s whipping out the Sylvian magic. You’d have to beg him not to.

He absolutely would give you kisses, doesn’t care a bit if he gets sick. “Nothing that an ibuprofen and some cigarettes can’t fix, my darling.”

He would straight up give you opium if you asked, there is literally no better partner if you’re easily sick or chronically ill. Your face would be covered in lipstick kisses by the time it’s over.

Immediately after he’s done, he would go back to being a sarcastic and calm guy. Perhaps a little shy?

—

Pav

“Have a beer, sweetheart.”

This is not… the best person to be stuck with in this scenario. Because of his experience in the war, his pain scale is a little screwy, so it would take a lot for him to be concerned.

He still sticks around you though. He’s loyal to a fault with his partner, I truly believe this, he’s protective and affectionate. He would not abandon you at your weakest, no no no no. That’d be cruel.

He holds your hair up when you throw up. He will draw you a bath or or give you cuddles! He’s definitely a bit more accomadating when you’re sick.

Pav doesn’t mind kissing you when you’re sick. He tells you he’s never been sick before, in his life. You’ve certainly never seen like it in front of you, but if he’s lying, it’s totally debateable. It could be that he does get sick, he’s good at hiding it. But knowing that, he’d still give you hundreds of kisses all over.

You have the honor of sharing snacks with him (greedy hoarding bastard). If you’re good.

[luveline]

jade my darling, could i please request the bf that is fred weasley looking after r with an ear infection? it could be muggle OR modern!au and not in the asf universe but up to u <333 i just need comfort from my freddie because i am in immense pain with a probable ear infection (spoiler: it sucks!)

sorry this took me those two days sweetheart i hope you're doing better now!! asf fred x fem!reader

"My mum said I should give you mudwort and lavender tincture," Fred says. 

"Both sound awful," you mumble, laying on your back on the sofa, hands held out to take his as he approaches. He tried to make you chew mudwort this morning, you vehemently denied it. 

Fred looks bitten by the cold, though he's barely been gone for ten minutes. Quicker to go see his mum and ask for a solution than pen a letter and wait for her to get it. He crouches down next to you and feels along your forehead with his cold fingers, a nice relief. 

"You okay?" he asks. 

"I'm okay, please don't make me take mudwort." 

"No, I won't," he assures you. He's wearing a frown, the 'my heart is so broken for you' expression he actually lets you see these days. 

"You used to do all your worrying secretly," you mumble. 

"So did you," he says, kissing your head carefully. 

You wince despite his gentleness, the ache in your ear having pervaded into your teeth and brow, even behind your eye. "Can I have more painkillers now?" 

"Yes, I think so. It's not quite been four hours, but," —he sighs and kisses your hand before letting it rest on your chest— "I don't think it's alright for you to be in this much pain, lovely girl." 

Even now his pet names make you giddy. Smiling through the pain, you pull the throw blanket he's laid over you upto your chin. You haven't cried for a few hours, but the pain is acute and building fast. Your eyes hurt, your nose hurts, Fred's too far away and his stupid brother hasn't come to see you, either. 

"Will George be coming over?" you ask. 

Fred pops ibuprofen and paracetamol into his hands. If you're refusing mudwort (as you have from the beginning of your sickness), then those will have to do. "Round two." 

"Time is it now?" 

"Two. Sit up, then, you can have these with some apple juice." 

You blow out a suffering breath and sit up. Your ear feels better for it, honestly, so you elect to stay sitting, taking your tablets and shifting your legs to make room for your devoted boyfriend to sit beside you. Luckily you're not contagious. Fred's the one who made you sick, and he got sick from one of his many siblings who got sick from who knows, but so far you're the only person to suffer with an ear infection. 

He's free to sit close to you and ogle you shamelessly. "You're still very, very pretty, even when you're ill. How do you manage that?" 

You smile at him. It's a sad smile, too pained to really give him much minding. "Practice," you joke. 

Fred appreciates your effort. He pulls your arm into his lap to touch gently, drawing shapes and stars and spirals into your hot skin. 

"Mudwort's not as bad as you remember," he begins lightly, his nonchalance a dead giveaway that it is definitely as bad as you remember. "It's like long grain rice, you know?" 

"It tastes like clay if clay was evil." 

"Yeah," he says, his guilty smile making apples of his cheeks, his freckles dancing. "Okay. The lavender tincture will be ready in a bit, you don't have any qualms against lavender, do you?" 

"Quite like lavender," you mumble, closing your eyes. You're too tired to stay alert but hurting too much to sleep. 

"I quite like you, ghost," he murmurs. Ghost a silly nickname and not silly at all, a lasting moniker that the twins defer to whenever they feel like being especially affectionate. You used to be very quiet before you met them, like a ghost. 

You frown deeply as a wave of throbbing pain worsens. Lost in it, you're unsure how much time passes, but George arrives at the same time as the tinctures ready, sitting gingerly beside you. 

"This is very unfortunate," he says. He pokes your arm. "Fred does realise that if he fails to look after you, we'll only have Lee Jordan left?" 

"You love Lee Jordan," you mumble. 

"Ah, but I love you more." You squint at him. He looks a lot like Fred, but he doesn't look at you as Fred does. When Fred looks at you, it's with a lovelorn, inescapable fondness, like he wants to wrap you up in his arms for days at a time and just hold you. George grimaces at your dishevelled appearance. "Well, I loved you. I'll give a heartfelt eulogy." 

"We aren't best friends anymore," you complain, pushing at his hand ineffectually. 

Fred sits down. You'd barely recognised his departure. "I think you should mercy kill me," you say, scrunching your eyes closed. You're joking but tears well unbidden along your lash line, trying hard to push out. You scrunch your eyes harder. 

"You'll be okay," Fred promises, tincture in hand. "I promise. You'll have a couple of drops of this, okay?" 

"Wait, I have to eat it?" you ask, suddenly much more reluctant. 

"Yeah. I'll take some too, if you like. We'll all have lavender mouths." 

You close your eyes and tilt your head back, knowing Fred will dropper the tincture into your mouth. It's oily and tastes cloying. George presses a cup into your hands, and you drink quickly to get rid of the bad taste.

You nearly gag, swallowing roughly against the oily feeling coating your teeth. 

"Bet you wish you'd taken the mudwort now." 

"Shut up, George." 

George doesn't shut up. He doesn't yell, but he talks to you for a while, staving off tears with his presence alone. He gives your hand a good squeeze as he says goodbye, promising to bring you a proper jar of sweets if you make it through the infection. 

"I notice you haven't offered me anything," you tell Fred as he sits down. Tears bump down your cheeks from the pain. You're trying to ignore them. "I want things, you know." 

"That's music to my ears," he says, pulling your head toward his chest gently, giving you the chance to stop him if it hurts. "I love when you want things. I'll get you literally whatever it is you want just as soon as you can fight your poorly ear off." 

Fred gives you a tiny kiss at your crown. You sniffle.

"What can I do?" he asks. 

"This is really perfect," you say, wiping your tears away before they can tickle. "I have everything I need until it's over. You and paracetamol." 

He knows how much you mean it. Nearly every horrible thing you've lived through has been while you were holding his hand. Fred looks a little like he could cry himself as he smiles at you, stroking your damp cheek with the back of his hand. He softens his touch as your eyes flutter closed, his voice like a hum as he says, "Sorry, lovely. I didn't mean to make you so unwell." 

"I could've slept on the sofa," you say with a shrug. 

"But you insisted on taking care of me, and now you're not well," he says, kissing your crown a second time. "I'm sorry. Please try not to cry, okay, it's only going to hurt more." 

"You need to distract me, then," you say, pursing your lips for a kiss. 

He leans down to give you the kiss you're craving. "Love you," he says, all smushed. 

"I love you, Freddie," you say, dropping back down into your cushion nest. "Don't feel guilty, okay? Everyone gets sick." 

"I just don't like you getting ill. You've had a rough enough go." 

You breathe in through your nose, pulling his upper arm toward you so he can't run away. He wouldn't, but still. 

"I can manage. Have a really nice boy looking after me." 

Fred makes a sound somewhere between a laugh and a groan and settles down next to you for the long haul. "You're easy to look after. Try and have a rest, yeah? Let's kip." 

[in-my-shifting-era]

Lost Keys

Spencer Reid (Fluff)

Summery: After a hard case reader just wants to get get home and sleep in her own bed.When readers keys keys goes missing. Spencer comes to save the day.

Warning: Normal Criminal Minds stuff. Some talk if a case that involves children. Nothing graphic. Reader does cry but it is more of frustration and exhaustion then sadness.

Authors note: I’m back! Sorry I haven’t posted anything. Life has been keeping me a little too busy. Writing has been on the back burner for a bit. As the poll determined here is a Spencer Reid post! Feedback would be amazing. I’d love to get some mutuals on here!

————————————————————————————————————————

The case was a hard one. Cases involving children tend to be harder to handle then others. Though the unsub was caught pretty quickly and the children taken where physically unharmed; this case took so much out of you. Having to think about what those children may have experienced at the hands of that monster.

You would have loved to just go back to the hotel room you had been staying in for the past few days and sleep this whole weekend off. Hotch insisted that the team would be home sleeping in there beds tonight. Even if that meant getting in at almost 2am. The thought of being on a jet for two hours feeling both physically and mentally exhausted was enough for a headache to start.

Your ‘Go’ bag had been packed up messily before heading to board the jet. You shuffled in with your team. Everyone taking there sports tiredly while having had one final debrief before take off. You sat down and tried to get comfortable. Tried being a key word there. You did not fall asleep once on the whole 2 hour flight. JJ offered you some ibuprofen for your headache. After hour in and still a pounding headache Spencer offered you chamomile tea. You ended up sipped on that as you watched the jet land.

You stretch lightly as you get up and gather your stuff to head to your car. Spencer stops and lets you off before him with a sweet but tired smile. You mimic his smile right back to him and head off the jet. You wait at the bottom for the young doctor. He always insists on walking your to your car when it’s late at night, and because you think he’s cute you let it slide.

His long strides get him down quicker then you. As you start to walk together he speaks. “So do you think you’ll make it to your bed this time or is your pillow still on your couch.” You laugh and roll your eyes playfully. “No actually I’m making an effort to sleep in my bed. Bosses orders.” You smile up at him and put your hands in your bag looking for your car keys as you approach where you thought you parked.

Your heat sank when you didn’t feel your keys where they should be. You stopped quickly and started searching more thoroughly. This action making Spencer almost walk right into you. You start to panic more when you don’t see the small wristlet of keys you usually have. Spencer places his hand on your shoulders gently taking you back to reality. “What’s wrong. What are you looking for.”

A pit of dispute hits your chest as your respond. “I don’t have my car or apartment keys.” Spencer’s small looks of pitty makes your eyes well with tears. “I could have left them on the jet. I’ll run and go see if-” Spencer steps in front of your swiftly and puts his hands on your shoulders gently to have you look at him. “Hey. It’s okay. It’s almost 3 am and you’re exhausted. I’ll bring you to my apartment. You will get some sleep and in the morning we’ll call and ask if they found any keys left behind.”

A single tear falls but only because your blinked while nodding your head lightly. “I don’t get to sleep in my bed though.” You look up giving him sad eyes because at this point your are almost delirious from no sleep. Spencer moves some hair behind your ear and smiles softly at you. “We’ll I am sorry about that. You can have my bed. We both like a more firm mattress so you’ll be comfortable. Does that sound okay?” You nod lightly loving the idea of sleeping in a bed after the weekend you’ve had and follow Spencer to his car.

Spencer left his oldies station on as you drove to his apartment. You hummed along to a Beatles song as you pulled up to the familiar building . You got out and follow him up to his appointment thinking about just how late it is. You both get in and take off your shoes and coat. Spencer leads you to his room turns on lights as he goes.

“I’ll give you some clothes if you want. Work clothes are not comfortable to sleep in.” You offer him a sweet smile. “Thank you Spencer. For all of this. I’m paying for our coffee on Monday.” Spencer smiles cutely. “Technology you owe me two coffees because when you spilled yours last week I gave you my cheese danish to eat.” You laugh remembering the hazelnut latte you lost that day. “Then I owe you a cheese danish. Sound fair?” Spencer nods and hands you some sweatpants and an old tee of his. “I’m going to the guest bathroom you can change in here or in my bathroom.”

You give him a small nod and smile as he leaves his room. You change quickly and do a very lazy version of your nightly routine in his bathroom. As you get back to his bed you see Spencer taking a pillow off and look around for an extra blanket..“ Am I kicking you out if you bed sleeping here?” He shakes his head. “No not technically. I just figured you’d be more comfortable if I slept on the couch.”

You shake your head and pat his side of the bed. “No. I’d feel terrible if you slept on the couch. Stay here.” He gives you a shy smile and puts his pillow back. “As long as your comfortable with it I’ll stay.” You smile tiredly at him as you getting under the covers on your side of the bed. “I’m fine with it. I’m usually comfortable when I fall asleep on your shoulder anyway. If I latch onto you just push me off the bed.”Spencer lays lightly and gets one his side of the bed making it dip slightly. “I never push your head off so this would be no different for me.” You blush lightly at the thought of waking up entangled with him. “Goodnight Spencer.” You close your eyes slowly letting Spencer’s “Goodnight” be what lulls your asleep.

[blooming-violets]

Giving preschool teacher Peter Parker a massage, I know those kiddos use his long limbs as a human jungle gym

[from this prompt list] [feel free to request a prompt from the list]

[tasm!peter parker x reader]

Gray Hairs and Massages

"And then, for some unknown reason, Marcus stood up and started singing Jingle Bells at the top of his lungs while Allie attempted to do the worm around him. She hit her face off the floor and got a bloody nose. Meanwhile, Jessica and Kit have climbed to the top of the bookcase and are attempting to jump off, Kevin has Chubs the hamster in his pocket even after I told him not to touch the class pet, Max is spinning in circles so fast that he starts puking, Rowen is crying in the corner because he misses his mom, and the rest of the kids are sitting on the circle time rug looking at me like they've lost all hope in my abilities to run a classroom!"

Peter let out a loud, exaggerated sigh and flopped face first onto the bed after detailing his chaotic work day to you.

"I thought fighting crime was hard," he mumbled into the bunched up blankets under his face. "Preschool is worse than any bad guy I've ever come across."

You repressed a laugh for his own sanity and took a seat on the bed beside him, "At least it'll be good practice for when we have kids. If you can handle 22 children, I think you should be able to handle four with ease."

He peaked his eyes up from his blanket prison to give you a questioning look, "Four? You want four kids now? What happened to only two?"

You shot him a smile and gave an innocent shrug, "Hearing you talk about the chaos made me excited. I want to see you in action. Super dad, Peter Parker. It has a nice ring to it."

He groaned and hid his face back into the blankets, "I don't think I could even handle one. These children are crazed. They're taking over. They know I'm weak. They can smell my blood in the water and they're circling into attack mode. They're going to eat me alive. One day someone will check in on me and my half devoured body will be staring lifeless up at the ceiling while the children have gone completely feral as they feast on my flesh for snacktime. It's Lord of the Flies in there. My head has been pounding all evening."

You chucked at his over exaggeration of the situation and patted his back, "Such a drama queen. My day was lovely, thank you for asking. I got to sit in a quiet library and sort books."

He rolled over and flopped his head into your lap, staring up at you, "That sounds wonderful. Wanna trade?"

"You wish." You brushed your fingers through his thick hair. "Want me to give you a massage? I'll go grab some ibuprofen for your headache and massage away your troubles."

He responded with a pathetically sad whine, "Please. I'm dying."

You scooted out from under him to go grab a bottle of pain meds from the cabinet, along with a glass of water, and your cooling eye mask from the fridge. When you returned, Peter was laying in his boxers and had half unbuttoned his shirt before giving up. His arms were flopped onto the mattress and spread out to either side of him while he stared in a daze up at the ceiling.

"Help me," he croaked, his voice clearly strained from trying to speak over boisterous four year old's all day. "'m so tired. Can't even finish taking my shirt off. Just wanna be comfy..."

"Oh, honey, you poor thing," you chuckled under your breath. "Come here."

You placed his things on the bedside table and quickly made work of unbuttoning his shirt. He shrugged it off his shoulders, grabbing the pain relief next to him and chugging the entire glass of water with it. You helped fix the eye mask around his face and he rolled back onto his stomach.

You climbed up on top of him, straddling your legs on either side of his hips, and started to rub your hands over his bare shoulders. Peter let out a low groan of approval.

"Your hands are so cold," he mumbled.

"Aren't they always like that?" You replied, working your fingers into his large muscles with circular motions.

"Yeah but they feel nice now. You should quit your library job and work as a masseuse. Libraries are a dying breed."

You gasped in feigned outrage, "How dare you speak of my beloved library like that?"

He shrugged his tense shoulders, a tiny smile gracing his half hidden face, "Truth hurts, baby."

"Yeah, well, at least I know I'll never become a preschool teacher."

"Hey, don't mess with us teachers. We're hardcore."

You laughed, "Says the man who couldn't even take off his shirt tonight."

He gave a sly smile, "Maybe I wanted you to be the one to undress me? Maybe I knew exactly what I was doing?"

"Or maybe you were exhausted and lazy?" You patted his shoulder and rolled off him, sitting upright on the mattress. "Turn around and roll over. Put your head in my lap. I'll massage your head."

He did as he was told and settled nicely into your lap, a lingering smile on his lips. You gently took the eye mask off his face to have better access to him. You started with a gentle pressure, circling around his temples and working your way up his hairline to his forehead.

"Imma fall 'sleep," he mumbled.

"Go for it. You deserve the rest."

You continued to work on massaging his scalp, listening to his breathing get steadier and softer, when you looked down and quietly gasped at what you saw. As you ran your fingers through his thick hair, you noticed a patch of gray glinting under the dim light. The more you brushed through it, the more single strands of gray you saw. It wasn't immediately obvious unless you were up close and grooming him like you were doing but, there was no denying it, Peter was graying.

"Well, shit," you whispered under your breath.

Peter peaked a sleepy eye open and mumbled, "What? Don't tell me a kid gave me lice again."

"Not lice. Did you know that you're graying?" You couldn't hide the tinge of amusement in your voice.

His eyes snapped open, the sleep vanishing from his face, and he shot up right.

"What? I'm not going gray! Don't say that!" He gasped, putting a protective hand to his precious hair.

You laughed at his over the top reaction, "Sorry, Pete, but go look in the mirror."

He rolled off the bed and ran to the bathroom. You laid down to curl up in the warm spot his body heat had left on the bed and smiled when you heard his yelp of horror from the other room.

"No!" He yelled. "Those damn kids! This is their fault!" He shuffled back into the bedroom with a pout. "Am I old?"

You rolled your eyes, "You're 35, Peter."

"Is that old?" He sank to knees beside the bed in front of your face and looked up at you with pleading, but playful, eyes.

You nodded, taking on a serious tone, "Very. Oldest man alive."

"Oy vey," he stifled a laugh with his hand. "Might as well get me a cane and call me grandpa. Now that I think about it, my father grayed really early and so did Uncle Ben. At least they both still had a full head of hair. I'd rather be gray than bald. If I start to bald, I need you to put me out of my misery."

You scooted over to give him space to climb into bed with you, "Come on, old man. I promise if you go bald that I will make you a wig out of my own hair."

He rolled into bed beside you and snuggled his face next to yours so your noses were brushing against each other, "I have gray hair."

"I know," you whispered back. "That's so fucking hot."

"Really?"

You nodded, "Oh yeah. You're giving off serious daddy vibes right now." You gave him a sneaky smirk. "Is this old man too tired to please his wife tonight?"

His smile matched yours as you watched his eyes spark to life, "Wow, look at that, I suddenly feel fully rested. You're the perfect cure to a crazy day."

[airlocksandaviaries]

MORE ETHAN HUNT HEADCANONS HAPPY 4TH OF JULY AND MI7 MONTH

- He can’t take ibuprofen anymore. With all his injuries he’s sustained over the years, he’s had to pop Advils like candy almost 4x a day sometimes in order to keep the pain at bay. Now he can barely take two without a stomachache and has had to switch to Acetaminophen. Sometimes most of the time he steals the Tylenol from the people on the team who menstruate.

- He is a very vocal person. He did all the voices for his disguises before they had technology to disguise his voice for him, he loves phone conversations, and he sometimes talks to himself when he needs to concentrate better. He refers to himself in the 3rd person when he does this. It motivates him.

- Game Nights with his friends and found family can get interesting. See, he never had siblings. So he is a laughably poor sport. He’s energetic and braggy when he’s winning, and appalled and discouraged when he’s losing. Once he cried when he lost Connect 4 because he was having fun and then Luther annihilated him in two moves that he didn’t expect. It was so jarring that Luther actually apologized and promised not to tell anyone. Ethan wouldn’t have minded either way.

- He loves having his hair touched. Nobody expects this because he’s always meticulous about how it’s cut when it’s long, and he doesn’t like when people mess it up when it’s styled. But as I said in my last post, he’s a very cuddly person. Having his hair lovingly touched is his kryptonite. There is even a spot on the back of his neck where if you drag your fingers through his hair in a hard line from there to the top of his head, and fluff his hair around a bit he will most likely collapse and/or tear up.

- He laughs at his own stupid jokes and puns. All of his team pretends to hate it. They all find it painfully adorable.

- He’s a movie crier. He hates dramas and horror movies and any films with sad endings because he will end up sobbing by the end. He can’t even watch ASPCA commercials or PSAs about hunger and homelessness because it makes him sad. It’s because it genuinely hurts him to see other people in pain, especially when there’s no way for him to help.

- On how he helps: Ethan is as good a listener as he is a talker. And when he knows there’s no way to physically take care of his friends and fix their problems, he listens to them. He checks in with them whenever he can, asking them how they are and how they feel and what they need. He’s a shoulder to cry on, with no judgement and no pressure at all. He’s heart wrenchingly tender and filled with empathy from head to toe. Because he knows what it’s like to need someone in that way. And he wants more than anything to be the someone that his friends need.

[arwenlalaith]

Cope With Me

Ship: Emily Prentiss/Derek Morgan

Summary: A rewrite of my long-ago fic: Healing. Post Retaliation. In the aftermath of the case, all Derek wants is to take care of her. All Emily wants is to feel something.

Word Count: 3143

Author's Note: This fills the Bruises square on my @cmkinkbingo2024 card.

Now that the case was over and the adrenaline was wearing off, the pain of her injuries was really starting to hit her. Derek had spent the entire case at her side, to the point that it was really starting to piss her off (as was their love language). It wasn’t that she didn’t want him to see her vulnerable – as weak – so much as it was everyone else...and now that they were alone, she no longer had the energy to resist him, so she let him support her as she hobbled towards their hotel room.

Once he kicked the door shut behind them and they were closed off from the rest of the world, he swept her into his arms, holding her tight to his chest for so long that she wasn’t sure he was ever going to let go. (Normally, she might not have indulged him so completely, but she had a feeling he needed it. And, though she’d probably never admit it, she needed it too.)

At length, he lifted her into his arms and carried her over to the bed, setting her down gently so as not to cause her more pain that she was already experiencing. Then, he pressed a tender kiss to her forehead, saying far more without words than anyone should be able; it was a skill they’d perfected over the years, the wordless conversation.

“Did the doctor give you any painkillers?” he asked, crossing the room to dig in her go bag for her pyjamas.

“I wish,” she said dryly, propping herself up on her elbows, “He said over-the-counter Ibuprofen should be fine. I have some in the...”

“In the mini-pharmacy you carry with you,” he finished for her, “Be prepared or whatever the Girl Scouts say.”

She rolled her eyes. “Hey, I’m a mom,” she said with a shrug.

“A damn good one,” he said, returning to her side and kissing her quickly, then tipped two pills into her palm, waited for her to pop them in her mouth, then passed her a bottle of water. “Do you want to get undressed and go to sleep?”

She shook her head. “No, I need a shower – I feel gross.” A beat. “But first...” She paused, tongue flicking out over her lip. “Could you...just...hold me for a bit?” She stared up at him almost pleadingly, as if he could ever deny her anything.

Normally, he might’ve made a joke, but he could tell she was feeling raw and vulnerable after the day’s events, so he held it back and climbed onto the bed next to her, pulling her into his side. He’d lost track of how many times they’d done this dance over the past three years, how many times they’d held each other during their most vulnerable moments, times they might normally have pushed everyone away for fear of seeming weak, instead letting each other in and finding a safe space in their arms.

He kissed her temple softly. “I was really worried about you,” he whispered, feeling reassured just to have her in his arms.

Her reply was muffled by his chest, but the words didn’t really matter. She was just grateful for the human contact, the feeling of his protective embrace and the sound of his heart beating softly. It was a sound that grounded her, that made her feel safe...it had from that first moment she’d rested her head on his chest years ago and had known that she was falling too hard, too fast, in a way she never had before. The accident had shaken her up far more than she cared to admit – in those moments as the car was rolling, she’d realized how very close she came to losing everything, how close she came to leaving their daughter without a mother.

Feeling her grip on the back of his shirt tighten, he kissed her temple again, murmuring against her skin, “You okay?”

“I just...” She trailed off, shaking her head. She didn’t know how to continue, why she felt this inexplicable urge to cry. For his part, he didn’t say anything when he felt her tears soaking the fabric of his shirt, he just held her tighter, murmuring sweet nothings in her ear as she cried.

She spent so much of her life trying to prevent people from seeing her as anything other than completely composed and confident, but he’d changed that. He’d broken down her defences and the walls she’d built up over the years to keep people out and, as surprising as it was, she found she didn’t really mind... She loved him and trusted him enough to let him see the real her. She let herself run into his arms when she needed comfort and warmth.

When her tears started to subside, she sniffled, pulled back from his chest to wipe away her tears. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, feeling guilty without really knowing why.

He cupped her tear-stained face in his hands and gently wiped away the tears with his thumbs. Staring into her eyes – and still finding them breathtakingly beautiful, even as they shone with tears – he saw the fear and pain glinting there and he felt his heart break just a little all over again. “You have nothing to be sorry for, baby. Let’s get you in the shower so you can get a good night’s rest,” he suggested.

She nodded, smiled faintly, grateful for the change of subject, though she didn’t say as much. When she attempted to stand from the bed, though, she winced, groaned, and fell back slightly. Instantly, he was at her side, helping her to stand. Reluctant though she was to admit it, she mumbled, “I can’t do it alone...”

Unable to resist teasing her just a little, he said, “Are you asking me to get wet and naked with you?”

She rolled her eyes, but barked out a laugh all the same. “You’re incorrigible.”

“You love it,” he retorted as he helped her limp to the bathroom. She settled on the edge of the bathtub and he proceeded to ease her shirt over her head and tossed it aside, but before he could unbutton her pants, she cupped his face in her hands, pulling him closer to her so their lips could meet in a tender kiss. He indulged her a moment or two, then pulled away, eliciting a little whine of disappointment form her. “I love you,” he told her in a quiet murmur to ease the sting.

His touch was soft and gentle, almost timidly so, as if afraid she would break were he too rough. At the same time, though, the careful way he undressed her was tender and affectionate in a way that only he could manage, a way that showed no matter how much he might want her, he would keep this chaste out of concern for her injuries.

The part of her that, in the aftermath of the accident, longed for human contact, to feel close to him, almost wished that he weren’t such a gentleman; the way he loved her always left her feeling loved and needed.

As he eased off her bra, she could feel his gaze wander across her skin – and not in the way he usually looked at her: full of lust, barely able to contain himself – and it took her a few moments to realize why... Her skin was mottled purple with slowly forming bruises; the diagonal line across her body from the seatbelt was going to pain her black and blue for weeks, that much was already apparent.

“Baby...” he murmured, then dropped a kiss to her shoulder. Then another lower down. Another lower still.

As chaste and sweet as his kisses were, they sent a shiver down her spine and her head lolled back a little as her breath hitched. If he didn’t stop kissing her like that, she was going to really want him in the shower and she knew it wouldn’t come without additional pain. “Get undressed,” she commanded once she’d managed to marshal her concentration enough to form speech.

“Wh-what?” he stammered, clearly taken aback by the command.

She tugged at the hem of his shirt. “If you’re going to help me shower, you’re going to need to be naked...” she pointed out. And, if she let her eyes wander as he tugged off his pants and boxer-briefs in one motion, well...she didn’t think anyone could fault her for that. (Afterall, the Bureau rumour mill – which wasn’t particularly known for its factual accuracy – had managed to get one thing right when it came to the size of his cock...)

Once they were both standing under the spray of warm water, Emily let out a little contented sigh as the water massaged out the knots that had tangled themselves into her muscles over the events of the day. She buried her face in Derek’s chest and he held her close, letting the water wash over them and wash away the fear and pain of it all.

At length, he gently turned her so that her back was against his chest and he proceeded to wash her hair for her, massaging shampoo through her hair, massaging her scalp as he did so. “Did I ever tell you that you have very talented hands?” she whispered, eyes falling shut as he languished in the feel of his fingers on her scalp.

“You’re gonna get yourself in trouble if you keep talking like that, Em,” he said with a laugh.

“I’m okay with that,” she replied, a mischievous smile crossing her lips. The way he was so lovingly taking care of her and the feel of his body pressed against hers made her willing to forget the pain in favour of a little more intimacy.

He almost laughed, thinking her joking, glad to see that her sense of humour remained intact. But, when she turned and looked into his eyes, he saw no hint of levity and quickly realized that she was completely serious. “Baby,” he said gently, trying to find the right words to soften the blow, “You know that’s not a good idea...”

Her face fell a little, a quick flash of sadness in her eyes, though she tried hard to hide it. Immediately, he felt bad, even though he knew he wasn’t wrong.

He remembered the time he’d been knocked unconscious by Foyet when he’d pushed him through the plate-glass window; he remembered the following night, wanting nothing more than to not feel so alone, to replace the horror and depravity with the warmth and closeness of being loved by someone he cared about.

“I don’t want to hurt you...” he whispered, hoping she’d understand that he was only refusing because he cared about her, rather than any lack of enthusiasm.

“You won’t,” she was quick to insist in reply.

He liked the fact that she trusted him enough to believe that he would never do anything to hurt her. “Baby,” he whispered again, kissing her gently, “I don’t want to take a chance. I don’t want to see you in pain again.”

She opened her mouth to protest, but didn’t get a chance to say anything because his lips found hers in that moment, kissing her deeply. He indulged her for several long moments before he eased out of the kiss, grinning to himself when she huffed petulantly. He could tell that he wasn’t going to win this one (not that he won all that much to begin with, to be quite honest), so with a sigh of concession, he said, “You have to promise you’ll tell me if I hurt you even a little.”

She nodded, quick to agree, though she had absolutely no intention of stopping once they got started. She wound her arms around his neck, pulling him in for a passionate kiss.

He moved to once again kiss the path of her bruises down her shoulder, between her breasts, across her belly until he was on his knees before her. He pressed a soft kiss to her clit and she gasped, her hand finding the back of his head.

He worked his tongue through her folds with delicate precision, having done this more than enough times to know exactly what it was Emily liked. He dipped his tongue inside her, tasting her juices, before once again renewing his efforts to make her see stars.

He could tell that he was effecting her by the way her nails slowly started digging into his scalp, the way her breathing became quick and ragged, the way she had to brace herself against the wall to keep herself upright. That’s when his tongue found her clit...

“Derek!” she gasped, “Derek, I want...”

He chuckled. “What do you want, Princess?” he asked, as if he really had no idea.

“More,” she said breathlessly, “I want your cock...”

“What my Princess wants, she gets,” he said, pausing to drop kisses along her hips where the lapbelt had left its imprint. Then, he stood, found her lips once again, swallowing her moan as he guided himself into her in one smooth motion.

He paused then, giving her a moment to adjust to the intrusion, resting his forehead against hers. “You alright?” she murmured, kissing him softly.

“I should be asking you that...”

Rather than answer that directly, she grabbed his ass, pulling him closer so he was forced deeper inside her and she let out a little moan. He knew then that he wasn’t going to last long if she kept going this way...and he knew her well enough to know that she absolutely would.

As he began to move, he did his best to be gentle, trying to avoid putting too much pressure on her hips where the lapbelt had lacerated. It took tremendous effort on his part to maintain his cautious pace, the feel of her throbbing around his cock making him want to lose all control.

Her arm wrapped around his neck anchored her as he thrust into her and it was all she could to do keep kissing him in silent encouragement. She arched against him, taking him deeper, wanting ��� needing – to feel more of him. She hummed in pleasure as he brushed the sweet spot inside her, all thoughts of her pain slipping away.

His fingers were delicate, tracing along her bruises, but she didn’t want delicate... She grabbed his hand, guiding it to her breast, cupping it with his palm and hoping he’d get the message. He quickly took over, rolling her pebbled nipple between his fingers and repeating the motion to coax each and every delicious sound from her lips.

“Look at me,” he demanded.

She opened her eyes, following his gaze, watching his hand slide down her water-slicked skin, gently caressing the cuts, bruises, and abrasions on her ivory skin until his hand reached her clit. She watched for a moment as he toyed with the sensitive bud, then shut her eyes again, the sight of him moving within her and his hand touching her was too much; she didn’t want to come undone so quickly.

“Look at me,” he commanded a second time.

This time, when she opened her eyes, it was to meet his gaze and, in that moment, it all became too much and she felt her orgasm flooding through her. She cried out as she came, feeling his thrusts slow as he languished in the feel of her cunt spasming around his cock.

When she came down from her high, she found his lips again, murmuring into the kiss, “Come with me this time.” She took it to mean agreement when he began to trail open-mouthed kisses down her throat, knowing that never failed to drive her wild.

“You feel so good,” he groaned, his thrusts a little more wild, less controlled. He knew he wasn’t going to last much longer...how could he when she was so wet and so tight around him?

“Derek...right there,” she moaned as he hit just the right spot, making her see stars. She was making it very difficult for him to keep things slow and tender the way he’d intended. She was eager, moving against him, matching each thrust so their hips bumped into each others’ sharply.

He fought an internal battle between wanting to be gentle as he’d planned and wanting to take her hard and fast, railing into her over and over until she forgot her own name.

“Baby...” she panted, “Baby, harder...”

He groaned aloud at her request. The last thing he needed was her egging him on like that, knowing he should be gentle with her after the events of the past twenty-four hours. Knowing that he’d hate himself if he caused her any more pain than she was already experiencing.

“Can’t do that,” he murmured between kisses. He tenderly stroked her cheek, looking deep into her eyes, needing her to see that he wasn’t refusing for any lack of desire. “Don’t make me do that, Em. I can’t hurt you. Don’t make me regret this...”

“Please,” she begged. “I can handle the pain. I want the pain...” He raised an eyebrow at that, but she was desperate and willing to beg. “Please...I need this.”

She was doing a good job of breaking down his best intentions – he wanted to give in to her, really, he did...and the way she was clamping down on his dick only made it that much harder to resist. Almost apologetically, he said, “I can’t give you what you want tonight.” He lifted a finger to her lips when she whimpered. “Shh. I promise you this will be good.”

She sighed in defeat, knowing that he was only resisting because he cared so much about her. He hadn’t even wanted to do this in the first place, only relenting because she begged him and because she’d promised they’d take things slowly and avoid the roughness that they weren’t altogether unfamiliar with.

“Emily...” he murmured, kissing his way back up her neck to her ear before finally meeting her lips once again. “So close...” he husked against her lips, thrusts growing erratic, his moans ragged. He knew he wouldn’t last much longer. “Come with me, Baby,” he urged, his eyes boring into hers, watching the way they seemed to glaze over with passion.

The sensation was too much for her: the feel of his lips showering kisses on her flushed skin, his trigger-calloused finger rubbing sharply on her clit, his cock hitting all the right spots inside her... With a final breathy shudder, she reached her climax once again and he hungrily drank in the sight – the way her lips parted, her skin flushing, her entire body trembling as she arched against him. She’d never looked more beautiful to him than she did in that moment, bruises and all.

[writing-whump]

okay request about my specialest babygirl, I'd love to know more of Matt's backstory!

Maybe a fever having him spill to Zaya and Sel?

Fever revelations

"Stay still," Matew grumbled against his shoulder.

"You are heavy," Isaiah protested with a fond smile.

Matthew was surprisingly clingy, when he was feverish. The redhead came home all sluggish and tired and Isaiah knew something was up before he napped through the afternoon. No surprise that when he woke up, he was shivering, flushed and more grumbly than usual.

Isaiah wanted to let him sleep in peace, but Matthew followed him around the kitchen like a lost puppy, blanket halfheartedly clutched around his shoulders. So Isaiah settled for the couch, Matthew a living furnace beside him, leaning against his shoulder under a heap of blankets while he trembled with chills.

"You guys watching something fun?" Seline's voice came from the staircase as she walked down.

She raised her eyebrows at them. "Cuddle session without me?"

Isaiah snickered.

Matthew got even more red than he was already, which was impressive. "We- this- ufff. This is not cuddling!"

He gave her an indignant stare. Would have been more effective if his eyes weren't so glassy, his nose wasn't running and his body was all but glued to Isaiah side for additional warmth.

"Matthew's sick," Isaiah explained.

"How do you always catch everything that comes through town?" Seline complained, sitting down beside Matthew on the sofa with a huff.

"As if I had any say in it."

"Well, hurry up and get better. It's just a week until Christmas!"

Matthew rolled his eyes, then sneezed loudly.

Seline grimaced. "Bless you. But you could at least cover your mouth."

"If you covered yours, I might not have ended u-"

Isaiah shook his head in exasperation, tugging Matthew closer against him, disturbing his equilibrium enough for him to cut himself off.

It seemed Seline and Matthew figured out a way to talk through awkward situations. Not that there was anything all that nice about it, but it put them both at ease and Isaiah knew nothing serious was up if they kept it up.

Matthew sneezed again, hugging himself. Isaiah adjusted the blanket so it covered him up to his neck.

Seline got up. "I'll make you some tea. You too, Isaiah?"

Isaiah nodded in thanks.

"What do you two always have with the tea? It's not a miracle cure," Matthew murmured under his nose. He was shivering, but sweating simultaneously, his brows and upper leap covered in it, dark red hair plastered to the back of his neck.

"It's healing herbs, warmth for your organism and it makes us feel like we are helping," Seline said cheekily from the kitchen as she put the water to boil.

Matthew rolled his eyes, then sagged against the sofa, rubbing at his temples.

"Don't do that," Isaiah chastised, "you will just make yourself dizzy."

"Already did," Matthew whined, pressing his forehead against Isaiah's neck and shoulder. "What the hell is a fever even for? I could handle the sniffles and the raw throat, but not being able to move because my body weights a ton doesn't make sense."

"It's fighting the virus inside you and making you rest. Or do you mean to claim you would not go for your run and then to the gym, if you only had the sniffles?"

"Tsk. Sniffles wouldn't stop me. Not a weakling..."

Isaiah just shook his head again, arm propped around the sofa where Matthew was leaning. Not quite snuggling, but opening the possibility.

Matthew sagged against him, grumbling something in gibberish as his voice trailed away.

Seline came with a tray of tea and cups, making a displeased pout, though her eyes were sparkling. "He didn't make it that long, huh?"

"Maybe better without the tea," Isaiah said, cupping the side of Matthew's face that was still hidden against his neck. "His fever is real high."

"Should I get him some cold compress? Thermometer? Or outright with the ibuprofen?"

Isaiah bit his lip in worry. It wasn't such a big thing. Matthew was strong, uninjured, safe and at home. Nothing that bad was happening. His chest still twisted in worry, like ants crawling down his ribs. "Maybe everything?"

Seline huffed, leaning over to kiss the top of Isaiah's head before going to collect the items.

In a few minutes, all three of them were settled on the couch, Matthew between them as per the tradition. Seline mopped the fever sweat from Matthew's neck and cheek, sliding it over his skin carefully.

Matthew groaned, wiggling uneasily under the touch.

"Shhhh. Just sleep. It's okay," she whispered, brushing a lock of hair away.

"Mmmmm." Matthew's face scrunched up as he slid down the sofa to an almost lying position, an arm around Isaiah's waist. "I don't feel good."

"I know, bud," Isaiah shushed, a hand running down Matthew's sweaty back, looking at Seline. "Maybe we should help him into some dry cloth-"

"Nooo. Don't send me to my room." Matthew's eyebrows drew together, forehead furrowing as he nuzzled against Isaiah's side.

Isaiah chuckled. "I'm not-"

"Please. I don't want to be alone there."

The smile vanished from his lips immediately. "Matt?"

"I swear I won't do anything. Just let me stay here."

Isaiah exchanged a concerned look with Seline, who lifted herself up on her knees. "Alright. That fever is going down." She reached for the meds and a glass of water on the table.

Isaiah put his arms around Matthew, helping him sit up so Seline could hold the pills to his lips. "Mattie, sweetheart, take these. Your fever is super high."

Matthew opened a bleary eye at them, nodding slightly and opening his mouth enough for Seline to slide the pills in. She held the glass of water to him to help him swallow.

Matthew shuddered, another chill running down his spine.

"Matt? You with us, bud?" Isaiah wrapped his arm around him from behind, guiding him back into a lying position on the sofa and against his side.

"Hmmmm. You are not leaving, right?" Matthew looked at him with big dark brown eyes. Isaiah didn't know if they glistened from the fever or unshed tears. His heart was clenching in his chest at the sight nontheless.

"Of course not, buddy."

"They wouldn't let me stay," Matthew complained, face scrunched up in concentration to finish the thought that troubled him. "Had to be in my room or outside...but I just wanted to see her again."

"Who did you want to see?" Isaiah asked softly, petting Matthew's hair.

"My younger sister. Marcella. She is a witch, so they wouldn't let me...but she was never afraid of me, you know? They...they were always afraid, but she never was."

"I didn't know you had a sister," Seline said quietly, propping her head on her hand, elbow on top fo the sofa as she watched Matthew carefully.

"Many siblings. But only Marcella...I only got to see her during summer holidays, when I got back from the boarding school...haven't seen her since starting uni." Matthew turned his face towards Seline, voice small. "She was so small back then. Do you think she would remember me?"

Seline frowned in thought. "Depends on how old-"

"Of course she would," Isaiah reassured, interrupting her. Objective information wouldn't be of help here.

Seline pressed her lips, bowing her head.

"Do you think..." Matthew's voice wavered dangerously, bordering on a sob, "do you think they would let me see her again?"

Ah. Isaiah knew Matthew was considered troublesome because of his giant shadow and bad temper. He obviously had control problems since he was a child. His pack was big, his family had many kids from Isaiah understood and they had little time and patience for 'problematic' shadows.

And witches were rare and precious for any pack to have. Isaiah wouldn't be surprised if Matthew's parents had as many kids as they could just so they could get one witch for a daughter. Humans would be ignored as disappointments if they didn't become something useful like doctors or lawyers and troublesome pups would be neglected and delegated to wolf boarding schools as soon as possible.

Isaiah wrinkled his nose. 14 was the earlier age to get into a boarding school. A very sensitive age for a wolf. Pups in their teen years needed good examples and guidance from their fathers and older brothers to manage their training and to rule their tempers. He didn't hear many good things about the boarding schools either. There were only a few of them specializing in wolves, to help them get their adult exam, which would give them permission to study and work in heavily human-populated areas.

"Your sister surely wants to see you as well. I don't see why they wouldn't let you guys meet," Isaiah said pragmatically, thinking of all the reasons that might not work.

If Matthew's family pack decided he was too much trouble to waste resources on, they would cut all contact with him. It was very likely that was what happened, with Matthew being known around the campus as the wolf without a pack. Not because he didn't want one, like Isaiah, but because none would have him.

Matthew grimaced, turning away from the light to press his face into Isaiah's thigh, drawing the blanket over his face. He was shaking slightly. "That's a merciful lie, Zaya. Thank you."

Isaiah rubbed his back, deciding then and there he was going to make that lie a reality, whatever it took. The next wolf meet was the week after Christmas. He would just ask around for the Blackwells a bit, see who represented them in the city and how he could get access to their leader. Arrange a meeting or two.

If Matthew's family wanted nothing to do with him, he could hardly make them. But if Matthew had a backing of a wolf known for diplomacy and control? If he had an official pack now, including a witch of his own? Isaiah could change their minds alright.

For today, he could just stroke Matthew's arm as Seline pressed against the redhead's back.

[ya-what--ya-erster]

Mistake, Regret, or Something to that Level

PROOF-READ CREDIT TO: @waiting-makes-me-antsy Thank you!!

Albert/Davey UNREQUITED, prequel to Goodbye Don't Last Forever

kinda angsty, enjoy.

David was lost. Completely and totally lost. How was he supposed to carry on when the center of his world just up and left without a word to him?

He didn't really know how to cope long term, but he knew that a visit to his best friend's house might just help.

Ever since Francis left David (a year ago), David and Albert had become the closest of friends (except for Race and Albert, but Race was off in Australia being an impressive dancer). The two were almost inseparable. Seeing one or the other alone was a rare occurrence which was usually met by some sort of joke about how joint at the hip the two boys were.

So David was on his way to Albert's apartment in January, wearing flannel sweatpants and a sweatshirt with a cute snake drawing on the front (Albert gave it to him). It was cold, and snowy, and he regretted not putting on a coat or a hat or anything, but it wasn't far to Albert's place.

By the time David knocked on the door, he thought he was going to die of the cold, but Albert saw him and immediately pulled him into the apartment and handed him a blanket.

"Dave, are you alright?" Albert asked, taking a seat next to him on the couch.

"No." David leaned sideways onto Albert, burying his face in his shoulder.

"Oh, come here." Albert put an arm around David. "You need to get drunk."

"Yeah I do."

...

Several hours (they think) later, the two are flat-out wasted.

David got honest when he got drunk, and never remembered anything afterwards, and Albert just got crazy (and maybe a little more confident).

"What if she was the only one I was meant to be with?" David asked.

"She wasn't." Albert laughed like it was the silliest thing he'd ever heard.

"But nobody could love me like I thought she did."

"But I love you." Albert's smile spread across his face. "You're my best friend."

"But don't people in love kiss? And boys can't kiss boys."

"I've kissed boys."

"Oh."

The boys fell silent, and then Albert burst into laughter again.

"What's so funny?" David asked (but he was smiling).

"Would you kiss me if I was a girl?"

"I would kiss anything if it were Francis."

"So pretend I'm her, then. It'll make you feel better to kiss someone."

"But-"

Albert cut Davey off with a deep, drunk kiss on the mouth.

And Davey liked it.

Davey wanted more of that feeling.

So he kissed back.

He could do whatever he wanted, he decided. It wasn't like there was anyone to tell him no, except for Albert who had initiated the kiss.

Very quickly, the kiss turned into more. Shirts unbuttoned, hands in hair, and the possibility of several purple marks to appear in the morning.

"Should we keep going?" Albert asked.

Davey blamed it on the fact that he was drunk that he said yes.

...

David woke up not in his bed. Albert's bed, he knew, from the many times he'd slept over.

David immediately felt guilty wash over him. Had he seriously kicked Albert out of his own bet just to fuck some girl that was not even there anymore? He didn’t really know, he couldn’t really remember, but it was fairly obvious in his mind that he had fucked someone. And Albert didn't do well with change in routine, Davey knew that. He was feeling worse and worse about it the more he thought, so he made a move to get up and go apologize.

The headache was not good as he stood up out of the bed and headed into the kitchen area of the apartment.

“Sorry for taking up your bed last night Al.”

“Doesn’t bother me.” Albert smiled. He handed David a glass of water and two ibuprofen pills. “This might help a bit.”

“Thank you.”

“No problem.”

“So. Uhm. Happen to know the identity of the girl I slept with in your bed last night or…”

Something flashed across Alberts face. Hurt. But he picked up quickly with a laugh.

“You should be asking who the guy was.”

“The… A guy?”

“Yessir.”

“Okay so uh who was this potential guy that I-“

Albert pressed a quick kiss to the tip of David’s nose, quieting him.

“Hi there.” He said with a little smile.

(Albert was dying inside. He wasn't this forward. He wasn't this confident. He wasn't this person who was flirting shamelessly with his best friend.)

“Oh.”

“Is that… is that okay?”

“Al, I… I didn’t even know- But I don’t even remember it so how am I supposed to know what it felt like? I don’t-“

“I could kiss you again.”

“What?”

“I said I could kiss you again.”

David didn’t respond, so Albert just cupped his face in his hands and kissed him.

Pulling away after a moment, David blinked. “Is that what that’s supposed to feel like? I never- it was never like that with her.”

“Good way or bad way?”

“Good.”

“Well, Dave. It must be really confusing for ya, all this. But… I’d like to help you along the way, if you’ll accept?"

"I don't think... Al, I don't think I can. I don't think I love you like that and I'm sorry-"

"That's alright, Davey. It is what it is."

...

Albert kept a smile on his face for two more hours while Davey hung around in his apartment awkwardly, too tired to walk himself home yet.

Albert, who was majorly stressed out, would have offered to walk him home. But, he didn't want to seem rude, and he didn't want to face the outside world with its flashing lights and loud noises and people bumping into him every five seconds.

As soon as Davey left, though, everything came crashing down.

Albert was stupid. Stupid to have done what he did. Stupid to have hoped that it would work out.

Mostly, though, he was stupid for falling in love with his best friend.

It wasn't fair that Davey was that effortlessly pretty and glamorous and nice and smart and perfect. Albert never even stood a chance.

So who could blame him, really, for crying? He had wrecked his perfectly routine life and possibly his relationship with his best friend.

He called Race in a desperate attempt to feel better, but it didn’t help much because then he just missed Race too. Why couldn’t Race be in the United States? Why did he have to be so far away?

Albert closed his eyes as he sat down on the couch, trying to make the tears go away. Crying made his head hurt.

But, despite that, Albert cried himself to sleep that night.

[shanie]

Of Brothers and Bloodbonds (Unfinished Samijey Fic)

Rating: Teen Words: 2925 Pairing: SamiJey, Sami & Kevin (platonic/brotherly) Characters: Sami Zayn, Jey Uso, Kevin Owens, Jimmy Uso (Mentioned), The Bloodline (Mentioned) Sitting in a hotel room in Detroit, Michigan, Sami spends the night tending to Kevin's ribs while watching Jey take on Roman. When Jimmy shows up and turns on Jey, Sami is even in the building let alone in a position to help. So, after the show, when Kevin (of all people) demands that Sami go spend the night with Jey, rather than spend it mothering him, Sami can't bring himself to put up too much of a fight. After all, he was the one to tell Jey to follow his heart. How could he ever abandon him now?

STORY IS UNFINISHED AND LIKELY NEVER WILL BE

(sorry)

“I mean it, Sami, you should go to him.”

Sami Zayn was fussing. Not that he wasn’t always concerned for Kevin; Kevin was his brother and Sami loved him with all his heart. He was going to worry about Kevin whether he was trying to heal him or hurting him personally. But ever since Kevin had gotten injured, Sami had been particularly protective, if for no other reason than he felt guilty about not having stopped it.

Not that he could have. The numbers game was a bitch.

But maybe that was why, when his former lover Jey Uso got toppled by it at Summerslam, Sami had felt guilty for a whole other reason.

But Jey was in the past. Beyond that, they were in the past. They were friends again, sure. Maybe. Sort of. A little. If you could call them not hating each other and simply being on speaking terms again “friends”. But regardless of what was happening at Summerslam, Sami wasn’t about to abandon Kevin to help Jey. Not again, at least, especially considering how badly doing so had gone in the past. Besides, It was Jey’s battle and had been for a long time. Sami knew he’d just get in the way.

And then, Jey had cried.

Sitting in the ring after the match sobbing over yet another betrayal and another loss.

He’d lost his go at the titles. He’d lost his chance to be Tribal Chief. But most of all, he’d lost his brother.

Jimmy. His brother, his twin, his whole world. The one person who Sami knew Jey would lay down his life for in a heartbeat had, instead, laid Jey out and left him at Roman’s feet.

It had stabbed Sami in the heart in a way he’d forgotten could hurt so much... which was strange because usually, when his heart ached that way, it was because he’d gotten stabbed in the back by his own brother yet again.

So when said brother saw the video with Sami and told him that he needed to go pay his old lover a visit...

“Seriously,” Kevin told him, “I’m fine here. He needs you more than I do right now.”

Sami shook his head. Kevin wasn’t feeling well. The painkillers had clearly gone to his brain, although how loopy prescription-strength ibuprofen could make you, Sami wasn’t sure.

“No way, Kev,” Sami told him, “I’m staying put. I’m not leaving you alone again.”

“Sami. I’m fine. The door is locked, nobody is getting in, it’s not like my ribs are gonna get any more fucked up in a hotel room in Detroit. You need to go check on Jey.”

Kevin definitely wasn’t feeling well.

Sami shot an incredulous look. “Since when did you care so much about Jey Uso? I thought you were sick of the Bloodline?”

“I am! But for fucks sake, Sami, the guy was sobbing. When did I care? When did you STOP? You’re the one who was so preoccupied with saving him, SAVE HIM!”

“Come on Kevin, he doesn’t...”

“Sami LISTEN! I – ”

Suddenly, Kevin winced and grabbed his ribs.

“Kev!” Sami shouted and practically launched himself off the opposite bed to check on his partner... only to get swatted away aggressively.

“I’m fine, I’m FINE!” Kevin barked. “Look, are you going after him or am I? Because I don’t think he’s gonna be very happy to see me right now. You, on the other hand, he would – ENOUGH WILL YOU STOP! GO FUSS OVER SOMEONE WHO NEEDS IT!!!”

Kevin practically shoved Sami and his ministrations off the bed, pushing him away to no small amount of protest. The reaction was quick, for both of them, and Sami’s chest hurt at the look of guilt on his best friend’s face.

“Look, sorry,” Kevin said quietly, “I’m sorry. I’m just... I’ve had a really shitty couple of weeks. Even the zoo sort of sucked as much pain as I was in. And I was kind of hoping that maybe, just maybe, this would all be over this weekend. That Roman and his narcissistic bullshit would be gone and the whole fucking company could move on. But that didn’t happen. What did happen was his poor bastard of a cousin got his ass beat and his heart broken and I’m not going to leave this alone for you to change your mind sometime when I’m not around and then you get your ass beat and heart broken too.”

Kevin’s jaw clenched and Sami watched him visibly swallow the anger that was bubbling inside him.

“So do us both a favor and go to him. You know his room number, find him, and fix him. Even if it’s just for the night.”

Sami’s heart was pounding in his chest at the realization of what Kevin had suggested before, as if to confirm, his friend added, “And I don’t want to see you until morning.”

Sami’s mouth suddenly felt very dry. If there was any doubt about what Kevin wanted him to do, it had been forcefully removed with his last statement, and, with nothing else to say, Sami replied with the first thing that did come to mind.

“How... how do you know I know his room number?”

Kevin gave a small smile that was stuck somewhere between sadness and understanding.

“You always do,” he said softly.

He always did.

And, closing his eyes and letting out a long sigh, Sami realized Kevin was right. He had to go. Kevin would be fine but Jey?

Jey had never been apart from Jimmy before. Not like this.

Sami’s heart ached all over again at the thought of what Jey might be going through. At the thought and, worse, at the memory of all the times he’d gone through the same. Bloody, tear-stained nights of him and Kevin tearing each other’s bodies apart while Sami’s soul did the same inside his chest.

It was never fun and, for as much as he’d cherished the connection they shared regardless of what side they were on the ring from each other, it left him feeling empty and broken every time.

And that was what awaited Jey Uso now.

Emptiness and brokenness.

All rendered at the hands of his brother.

Sami got off the bed and, nodding with his decision, opened his eyes to gaze at his own brother.

“You’re right,” he told Kevin, “I’ll go.” .......

Kevin hadn’t been kidding about Sami always knowing what Jey’s room number was.

At first, it had been easy – The Bloodline always lived in the lap of luxury. If Sami knew what the hotel was, all he had to do was find the Executive Suite, and, guaranteed, they’d be there. He’d made a point early on to always locate the suite in the building when he arrived and, while he’d never admit it, on more than one occasion had requested a room swap to something close enough to maybe even catch a sight of his old family. He was careful, always careful, and if they’d seen him watching they’d never gone after him, but something about keeping them close, about keeping Jey close had always felt right to Sami.

But once Sami had reunited with Kevin things got a bit… trickier. Kevin was jealous, always so damn jealous, and Sami had to use a trip to the ice machine as an alibi to figure out where the Usos were staying.

It hadn’t taken long for Kevin to figure out what was going on and, after Kevin had caught him behind a corner watching Jey catching some air on a public balcony near the master suite, he’d gotten hell for it. To be fair, Kevin wasn’t angry about Sami’s feelings – those he’d figured out ages ago – it was more a case of Sami being stupid and creepy about following around an ex who wanted nothing to do with him when he and Kevin were ostensibly supposed to be partners.

Sami had to admit Kevin had a point about that. Even if Jey did want him around lurking in corners watching him wasn’t the way to go about seeing him, regardless of Sami’s intentions.

When Kevin asked him what said intentions were, Sami hadn’t been able to answer, but then how the hell was he supposed to tell his partner that regrets about leaving Jey behind in the Bloodline and laments about how Jey had chosen Jimmy over him were keeping him up at night? How the hell was he supposed to tell Kevin that seeing Jey, even from afar, was the only time the bullshit in his brain truly shut up? That keeping tabs on Jey and always knowing where he was and that he was ok was the only thing keeping him sane?

No, Kevin didn’t understand, especially when following Jey around kept getting him hurt instead and Sami resigned himself to asking the other superstars what room the Usos and their little brother were staying in. And, once tensions began to flare between the three of them and their cousin, Sami started asking the front desk. Sami had always felt like the trustworthy sort but the ease with which he usually got the information made Sami wonder if Jey wasn’t saying something upon check-in.

He wanted to think Jey was. He doubted he was.

But, regardless, it was another night in another hotel room and once again, Sami knew exactly where to find Jey Uso. Far from the master suite or any suite at all, just a regular hotel room that was honestly beneath Jey. Roman and Solo could go fuck themselves, Jey was the one who belonged in the executive suite.

Jimmy too. Fuck him too now.

The whole lot of them, Jey’s whole family, none of them deserved him and, really, Jey didn’t deserve them. He deserved so much more. To be loved, to be protected, to be champion.

Most of all, he deserved to not be alone. And as Sami looked around the hallway standing outside room 403 to make sure nobody had followed him, he knocked on Jey’s door, intent on making sure Jey wasn’t.

There was a moment, or rather, several. Several moments of agonizing silence where a thousand worries crossed Sami’s brain. What if Jey had gotten a different room? What if Jimmy had come after him? What if Roman had? What if Jey had done something stupid? Oh god, oh fuck, Jey, Jey, JEY…

But then, noise. The sound of multiple locks being unbolted and unlatched before the door cracked open without a word.

Not swung. Cracked.

And, a moment later, began to close again.

“Hey!” Sami said, quickly shoving his foot forward to block the door.

If there was an invitation to enter beyond the door opening, Sami didn’t get it but he also didn’t care. If Jey hadn’t wanted him in there, he wouldn’t have unlocked the door let alone opened it. That was just how Jey Uso was. You only ever got as close as he wanted you to.

Sami entered the room quickly, taking one final look around, closing the door behind him, rebolting all the locks… and almost plowing over a folding chair that had been propped against the wall behind the door.

“Use the chair too,” Sami heard Jey say. His voice was so small and broken and, as Sami saw his former lover standing in front of him, two things struck him immediately.

Jey’s back was to him, tattooed, bare, and exposed.

And Jey was still crying.

Sami made a mental note to buy Kevin an entire tray of his favorite cupcakes when they returned home as a thank you for pulling his head out of his ass. Kevin was fine, Kevin didn’t need him at all that night.

Jey, however…

Silently, Sami unfolded the chair and propped it under the doorknob.

“You know,” Sami said softly, “if there’s a fire or something, this is gonna make it really hard for the firefighters to get in.”

“Good.”

“Did you steal that?”

“Does it matter?”

“No.”

Jey didn’t respond to that, simply moving over to the bed and laying down, curling into a ball and clinging to a pillow that looked like Jey had been holding it in a death grip for hours.

Sami felt his heart kick at the sight. Jey, so proud, so strong, tucked in the fetal position over the betrayal of the twin he’d shared the womb with. It was... honestly it made Sami want to cry. But really, with as red and puffy as Jey’s eyes were at that point, it was obvious Jey had done enough crying for both of them. Instead, Sami stood across from Jey, leaning against the wall and trying not to disturb the typically bland painting of flowers that always seemed to decorate every hotel room across America.

For several moments, they stayed like that, silent beside the quiet sounds of Jey’s sniffles.

It was Sami who broke the silence first. “How’s your head?”

A sniffle. “... hurts.”

“Those superkicks hurt.”

“Yeah.”

There was a beat before Jey added, “Sorry.”

Sami smiled sadly. “Don’t worry about it.”

Another sniffle, this time accompanied by a fidget and Jey adjusting his grip on the pillow. “Nah, man. You was right. All along. Never shoulda listened to him.”

“Don’t beat yourself up over it. Roman can be very persuasive.”

“I didn’t mean Roman.”

“Oh.”

Jey’s grip somehow tightened even further and Sami sighed. He had to get Jey out of that headspace, he knew that much. Jey lived deep enough inside his own mind on his best days but when he was in the worst places, he tended to spiral. Sami had seen it happen.

He’d caused it to happen.

He didn’t want to think about that, though. Not when Jey was suffering at that moment for a whole different reason. From a whole different person.

Sami pushed away from the wall and stepped over to the bed. “Hey,” he said softly, placing his hand on Jey’s arm, “Come on, get up. Here, let go...”

Jey’s whole body twisted, pulling his arm away from Sami’s reach.

“Jey, come on, don’t -- ”

“Go away.”

“I’m not going to leave yo – "

“I SAID GO AWAY!”

“NO! I’m not leaving!”

Sami reached across the bed and grabbed Jey’s wrist, pulling it free. In an instant, Jey’s eyes blazed, his fiery temper shining through and matched only by the fire in Sami’s eyes. But, in the instant after that, Sami’s gaze softened, turning from fire to warmth and for as much as his grip didn’t loosen, the intensity of the touch shifted drastically.

The effect it had was quick, Jey’s rigid form relaxing just enough to allow Sami to relax as well.

“Sami...” Jey said and, oh, his voice. So strong, so angry, but not at him. Not really, and Sami couldn’t help but smile.

“I’m not leaving,” Sami repeated softly.

“You did once. How’m I supposed to trust you won’t again?”

Sami’s thumb absently brushed Jey’s wrist as he replied, “I left Roman, not you. I’d hoped you’d come with me.”

“I shoulda.”

Sami sighed deeply. “Well, uhh, hindsight’s...”

“Ya, I know,” Jey said, cutting him off and this time pulling his wrist away and releasing the pillow, pushing it behind him and swinging his legs around to sit on the edge of the bed. He aggressively rubbed the tears away, roughly, as if he could just scrub them and the pain they represented from existence, and added, “Hindsight’s 20/20. I got it.”

“Actually,” Sami replied, “I was gonna say it’s a bitch.”

Jey’s face lifted, just for a moment, and their eyes met, and Sami’s heart broke. They were red, sure, but the pain and anguish in them was so deep that it was rending Sami’s soul simply from seeing it.

So he couldn’t look at it anymore.

Sami quickly took a seat beside Jey on the bed, not touching him, but still close enough that he could feel Jey’s presence against his skin as if the flames that were always burning in Jey were warming him like a fireplace. Sami stared at the wall in front of both of them, not quite looking and far from seeing, but at that moment it was better than the alternative, so he figured he would focus on it anyway.

For his part, Jey’s eyes were on the floor.

And this time, the silence was broken by him.

“I never thought...” he began, his voice small again, “Me and Jimmy. We ain’t never been apart. He’s always had my back. And now... I got nothing. I got no one.”

“Not true.”

“What? Who else I got? You?”

For such a bitter statement, there wasn’t nearly enough bitterness in his voice for Sami’s taste. And he could have done without the defeat that was in its place. He turned his focus to see Jey, still staring at the floor, and let out a long breath.

“Yeah, I’ve been pretty shit about that, haven’t I,” Sami admitted. “Sorry. Maybe if I had been there. I shouldn’t have left you – ”

“Man, don’t start that shit, I ain’t your responsibility. I can handle my own stuff, Uce.”

“I know. And I’m proud of you.”

The speed with which Jey’s head spun to stare at Sami, his eyes wide with shock at the redhead’s words – it made Sami sick to his stomach as he realized why. There was no way, it couldn’t be...

“Has - Has nobody told you that yet???” Sami asked. “Nobody???”

(end of written part)

As a heads up for the end of this story... Sami convinced Jey how proud he is and that he acknowledges Jey. And that, as far as Sami is concerned, Jey is the HIS tribal chief. Jey says that he said the same about Roman. When Roman made him Honorary Uce, Sami was real quick to call Roman his Tribal Chief.

Sami corrects him by saying that he called Roman "Tribal Chief". But he never said Roman was HIS Tribal Chief.

Jey is shocked, rememebering that night and realizing Sami is right and they kiss. Sami makes a comment that, if Smackdown ever grows too inhospitable for him with his family around, there's always a spot for Jey on Raw at his side. Jey questions if Kevin would be OK with that and Sami says "Probably not, but he'll get over it."

The story ends with Jey asking if Sami wants to spend the night and Jey tells him he had sort of planned on it. They get comfortable and Jey crawls under the covers, curled up facing the door.... away from Sami. Sami is shocked, but Jey insists he gets into bed.

Sami realizes what the gesture means. Jey is turning his back on him... the last person left in the world he would do that for... and Sami turns the light off and curls around Jey, promising that, as much as Jey's family might break his heart, he will never do the same. Never again.

"I love you," Sami says.

"Yeah. Love you too. And Sami? Thanks"

"Any time." And with that, Sami kisses Jey on back of the neck and the two fall asleep together.

Sorry I never got to finishing this. I wish I had. I had this and another one in my mind but they just never got done. Forgive me.

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Character voice

Thanks to @elsie-writes here, @elizaellwrites here, @mk-writes-stuff here and here, and @willtheweaver here.

Rules: rewrite a given line in your OCs' voices!

Got long, under the cut :)

"I've got a headache."

Lexi: "Oh, man I got a headache. Well, that's what ibuprofen is for. Time to go out to a crowded bowling alley!"

Maddie: "I've felt worse. I'll be fine." (Is dizzy)

Ash: "I have felt worse before. Maybe I should use those probing devices :)" (bad idea)

Gwen: (if she has nothing to do) "I should probably go lie down. I don't feel good." (If she does) "I feel terrible, but I'll push through. For [person]."

Robbie: "Pfft I'll be fiiiine don't worry about it! I have braved through more before!" (Is later seen lying down)

Akash: "No need to worry about me. I'll take some Tylenol and be okay."

Jedi: "I will be alright. We have medication for a headache." *Injects himself with some over the counter drugs*

Carmen: "Everyone BE QUIET I have a headache!"

Everyone is so healthy here (:

Prompt: Uh oh, you forgot to do something very important!

Lexi: "Oh no! I forgot!?? How??" *flips frantically through her color-coded planner* "I couldn't have forgotten to write it down.... it's not possible...it has to be here somewhere..."

Maddie: "I did? Whoops."

Ash: "Oh. Sorry. Uh, guess I'll try and remember next time."

Gwen: "Oh my gosh I am so sorry I forgot!! I've been under so much stress lately... It won't happen again. What can I do for you to help?"

Robbie: "Oh SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT--" *scrambles around trying to get it done in five seconds*

Akash: "WHAT?! Shit, there's no way I forgot... Guess I did, huh. What is wrong with me? This is why I write stuff down... Oh, um, sorry I forgot, man. Uhh hey is there any way I can make this up to you? Like now? Cause this may haunt me."

Jedi: "Oh, I am terribly sorry... It must be sleep deprivation... I apologize, I will go do that now."

Carmen: *borderline panic attack, likely kicks or punches something*

"Where are we? How did we get here?"

Perfect for TSP actually

Lexi: "Wait, what just happened? Everything just simultaneously changed. The temperature and humidity levels are different. I must be dreaming." (Anxious)

Maddie: "Woah that was super weird. Where do you think we are? (Excited and curious)

Ash: "What-- that isn't possible...but it clearly is... what happened?" (Is also genuinely curious)

Gwen: "Woah. How did we get here? It's... admittedly cool here. Beautiful even."

Robbie: "Holy shit, where are we?! Did I blackout? Or was I just walking and not paying attention so much I took a wrong turn?"

Akash: "Dude...what happened? Did we take a wrong turn? I don't think we did - I was paying attention."

Jedi: "Well... *looks around and pokes at the map on his tablet* it appears this map was not as straightforward as I assumed. I frankly have no idea how we got here. I suppose we are lost. Well, if we must be here, let us survey the area and collect data." (This is what I call the Star Trek Voyager method)

Carmen: "Who gave me wrong directions?! There is no way I possibly got lost. Who can tell me in precise detail how we got here?!"

"I don't have enough curse words for how much you pissed me off."

This one was harder than I thought because most of these guys don't get cold angry, but I'll try.

Lexi: "I have a pretty large vocabulary. I know all the synonyms for, like, every curse word. But I don't think that I know enough for you!"

Maddie: "Hm. I'm not sure I can think of enough curse words that can describe how I feel toward you. Like, none of them work."

Ash: "I would love to cuss you out, but nothing is accurately describing how mad I just got."

Gwen: "I'm not exactly one for swearing, and I'm really pissed that I can't use any cuss word in English, Spanish, or Italian because you're making me so angry."

Robbie: "Bro, I have the most creative swears I know, and even I can't think of one you deserve."

Akash: "Y'know you're pissing me off so much that I literally cannot think of a good enough swear for you."

Jedi: "I will have you know that I am not one for expletives, and I see that this is because I have never been able to find one that quite describes how I am feeling toward people like you."

Carmen: "I would love for you to see how angry I am, but unfortunately you're such an irritating idiot that I cannot find a single swear in my vocabulary that can accurately depict that fury!"

"You want me to eat that?"

Lexi: "Oh, you want me to eat this? Um, that's...fine, thank you.... Y'know I actually ate a lot earlier, and I don't think you want me to eat anything else...thanks though. Really thoughtful of you."

Maddie: "I don't want to eat that."

Ash: "No offense, but I'm not going to like this."

Gwen: "It was very sweet of you to think of me, but I don't actually like [ingredients]. Yeah...sorry. I feel bad, can I do anything for you?"

Robbie: *long exhale* "Look, man, I know you worked really hard on this. And...yeah it's awesome for you to uh....do this. But...I don't think you want me to eat that."

Akash: "That food looks interesting. Oh, you want me to eat that? Umm. Okay..."

Jedi: "It would...be my pleasure to eat this. However, I am afraid I don't quite like this meal."

Carmen: "Why would you want me to eat that? It's gross."

Alrighty that's finally done. Softly tagging @aziz-reads @atelierwriting @mysticstarlightduck @steh-lar-uh-nuhs @stesierra @rickie-the-storyteller @sam-glade @memoriethereaderandwriter-blog @ahordeofwasps @spitefulbull + anyone else who wants to

Your phrase is, "Who would leave milk on the counter?"

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

[livelaughlaw3]

The unbereable pain of periods (Part 2/2)

Part 1 : https://www.tumblr.com/livelaughlaw3/751567298757869568/the-unbearable-pain-of-periods-part-12?source=share

TW : creampie, unprotected sex, smut, period sex, first time, angst, sadness, insecurities, virgin reader, physical touch, period pain, blood, flirt, knife, suividal thoughts, fluffy end <3333

You are single in this story and Shanks is only your Captain. (He has two arms because he's too smart to have lost his arm that way and Oda already said it was his editor who told him to tell that story.)

(It's literally day 5 of living on three pills of ibuprofen a day to relieve my fucking pain and it's not even working, plus it's ruining my liver, so I needed to think of something else.)

You couldn't fall asleep, even though the entire crew, except Shanks, went out. You sit back down, a little awkwardly, he holds your hands to help you. “Are you still in pain, sweetheart ?”, you nod. He guides his hands to your thighs and spreads them slightly then slides his palms under your dress to help you. It does you a lot of good. You tell him “It doesn’t completely make the pain go away but it gives me some relief..” He smiles at you, continuing, his hand moving very dangerously close to the edge of your panties. You decide to tell him “I-I.. hate.. seeming.. w-weak.. because of that..” He shakes his head “No honey, you’re far from weak. You didn't choose it either. I will help you every time.” He talks to you but the pain starts again and you forgot to take the next pill. It's been over an hour since you were allowed to take it. He makes you lie down and asks your permission. He then places his hand on your collarbone then between your breasts then on your ribcage. “Breathe my love, there you go. My hand must rise. Try baby doll. Keep going.. That’s good.” You nod, groaning in pain then you place your hand on his, trying to breathe. He's actually very worried, even if he doesn't show it to you. He strokes your hair with his other hand and you still hold his hand on your chest. It passes between your breasts, through the fabric, several times, helping you to think of something else for hours.

Hongo and the rest of the crew go out to the island, you encourage your Captain to go with them and you tell him that you will watch the boat, he refuses even if you insist, as Benn and Lucky return two hours later, he allows himself to be convinced. He leaves, after asking you if you need anything. Benn stays to watch the ship, while Lucky has prepared some food for you. You sit on the deck with them and say goodnight. Having escaped the vigilance of the on-board cook, you enter the kitchen and grab the first knife you find. You return to the room and sit on the floor, leaning against the wall. You're taking a long time to decide. Unfortunately for you, your Captain comes home a few minutes later, too impatient to talk to you. He opens the door, slightly tipsy. Your eyes meet, he scans you with his eyes, you hold a knife to your stomach. He rubs his eyes, thinking he's going crazy. He walks towards you, putting his hands in front of him. “Y/N.. Give it to me.. Please.. What do you want to do with it ?” You respond, angry with yourself “That way.. at least.. I would have.. a real reason.. to be in pain..” He shakes his head “Noooo, don’t do that, don’t do that, give it, I beg you !!! Please.. Please give it to me.. Y/N.. Don’t do that.. Give it back to me..”

You let yourself be convinced, you make him worry even more. He immediately became sober, suddenly, seeing you in this state. He takes the knife again and puts his hands under your armpits then lifts you into his arms. You rest your head against his shoulder, he explains to you “Come on. Come on, I’ll take you to the hospital.” He actually carries you to the hospital, making you sit on his lap in the waiting room. You burst into tears, apologizing but telling him that you can't take the pain anymore. “It’s nothing at all darling. Really, just don't do that again. All right ? Don’t ever think about hurting yourself again.” You nod, hugging him close. He covers you with his cape, while wrapping his arms around you. You are examined quickly and a nurse gives you a slightly more powerful painkiller. In reality, it doesn't work and won't work all evening. You hold your stomach with both hands on your bed. Shanks remained seated, close to you. His hand on your thigh, repeating the same movements as a few hours earlier on the ship. You look at the walls of the room and the dilapidated state of the premises. You sigh, biting your tongue, he removes his hand to put it in your hair. He is silent, helpless, watching you suffer. You start to cry again, in silence, his heart tightens. He wipes your tears “It’s going to be okay, it’s going to go away, don’t worry.. Breathe angel.. I’m right here.”

It’s too painful and you’ve been waiting for almost three hours. He gets up and goes to get a doctor, it doesn't matter which one. Besides, you hear him get angry at some nurses who tell him to wait and that your case is not serious. A doctor agrees to re-examine you, especially worried about what a pirate of Red Hair's caliber could do to them. Same reaction, same heart rate, same stable state. A nurse serves you the meal but your instinct tells you not to touch it, and rightly so. You pretend you're not hungry, even to Shanks. He doesn't insist and warns you that he will buy you something else. She comes back a few hours later, seeing that you haven't swallowed anything. She cheekily says to you “Are you together ? Because an orgasm is excellent for cramps. You tried ?" Shanks, embarrassed, looks at the nurse and says no, you didn't try. She leaves, warning you that you will go out in the evening with other medications but makes you understand that they will not be able to do anything more for you. He goes out for a while to talk on the phone with his crew when that same nurse comes back again, telling you “Are you really not together ??!”, you shake your head. She asks you “So, can I try my luck ?” You lower your head, you don't want to speak for him, she leaves, happy as hell.

Exhausted by the events, you pull your IV from your arm, tearing it off then you get out of your bed. You twist the cable around the IV stand behind the bed but you feel dizzy. Shanks enters the room and immediately tells you “No, wait, wait Y/N, I'll help you.. Wait..” Coming up to you, you're already finished and you bend down to pick up the IV and To throw in the bin. He feels guilty, you tell him you want to go home. He nods like a soldier “Yes, okay, of course.” He asks you “What did the nurse want ? She came by again..”, “You.” He looks at you, with big eyes “Huh ?!”, you specify “She wanted you.” He scratches his head, uncomfortable, you ask him “Can you help me please ?..” He follows your gaze to understand that you need to tie your shoelaces. Of course, he immediately kneels down to tie your shoelaces. He gets up, you thank him, he guides your hands behind his shoulders and his hands under your thighs to carry you. You cling to him, you tell him that you don't want the medicine that will be given to you. You left before she came back. He accepts and carries you to his room. He makes you sit on his bed, in your usual place. He removes his cape and sword then stands to brood while you still hold your stomach. He says to you “What exactly did she say to you ?” You sigh “She’s going to try her luck. Wanted to be sure we weren't together. and blah blah blah…”

He collapses on his bed, next to you, disgusted at having left you all alone. He strokes your hair and then asks, “Is what she said about orgasm, true ?” You nod your head, he asks you “Ahhh but has it already worked ?” You shake your head, he looks at you, confused. You tell him “I've never done it..” He's a little surprised, it's a bit cliché but you're a very pretty young woman and you turn heads so he thought you probably would have already had someone in the past. He asks you “Do you want to do it ?” The question was direct, straightforward, of course leaving the right to refuse. You answer “B-But.. I don’t know how to do..” He smiles, his hand moving to the back of your head “It doesn’t matter, let me help you..” You inhale and ask “Are they back ?”, he says to you “I’ll see. I will be back." He gets up, closes the door, a little stressed. He feels like he can't go back. He reopens his door, answering your question “The ship is deserted but I can close the door if you want ?” You nod, he does so, he thinks at a thousand miles an hour in his head. All his thoughts are racing. He sits in front of you, grabs both of your hands and asks “Y/N.”, “Yes ?..” He tilts his head to the side “Don’t we have to ? If you want, I will be ready for you. If you don't want it, I won't do anything. If you want to stop, I will stop. All right ? Would you like to do it for the first time with me ?” You accept, he smiles at you then guides you onto his knees to kiss you.

It's a revelation, he kisses like a God, it seems so natural. A little too good for a Captain who does this just for the sake of his teammate. You smile when he stops for a moment and says. “A little too passionate for a first time, right ?” He apologizes a lot but you stop him right away. You hold his shoulder and the other hand traces his chest as you answer him “I didn't say I was against it, I like it Captain.. Please continue..” He is not kind of asking for a long time. He resumes, the kiss is so languorous that you feel the blood flowing into your pad. Then he moves to your neck, you hold on to his shoulders for dear life. He dragged out the foreplay, wanting to make sure he didn't hurt you. You say in a low voice “I'm taking the pill..”, “Okay, no need for a cond-” You cut him off “No.. it's okay..”, he smiles at you, holding your cheek in his hand. Two or three furtive kisses and he gestured for you to lie down on his bed. He helps you onto your back, caressing your thighs. “Lie down my love. Relax, you’ll have a great time, I promise.” Gently removing your clothes, he leans lightly on you to kiss you. He squeezes his fingers, in and around your pleasure spot. He made you so wet to prepare for his entrance, painlessly. He takes off his clothes slowly while you look at him, not the least stressed in the world. He holds your hand to reassure you, finding you so cute.

You didn't see any of his smirks that he usually reserved for you, under other circumstances. No, it was another smile, more of the silly, happy kind. His eyes scan your body like he’s looking at the eighth wonder of the world. Your breasts seem so soft against his chest. To begin penetration, he kisses you. It slides extremely well, between the blood and your water. Its rhythm is slow and gentle. You moan in pleasure, his name, praises on his rhythm. But you often ask him to go slowly. He frowns “Honey, am I hurting you ?”, holding your cheek against the palm of his hand. He stopped inside you, you shook your head, still holding his other hand. “Okay, squeeze my hand, if ever.” You nod, he kisses you again. The pulsation comes as much from you as from him. Suddenly, you stand up and look at the ceiling. He stops, you panic, remembering. You put your hand in front of your mouth “Ohhh !!! Sheets !!! Sheets !!!" He shakes his head “No treasure, there’s a towel, look.” You nod, he doesn’t continue. He thinks, literally, always in you. You touch his shoulder as he looks lost in thought. He continues, smiling at you but still gently. You moan his name, boosting his ego “It’s okay baby doll. I’m right here.” He keeps his hand on your lower stomach, the place that hurts because of your period and at the same time, the place where he is. It’s hot, pleasure radiates through your thighs, already removing some of your pain.

He moans too, when you shout “SHANKS !!!”, he weakens, afraid of having hurt you. You made the Pirate Emperor stutter “Yes.. Y-Yes baby ?? Are you not okay ? Are you feeling bad ??!” You feel your heart beating between your thighs, literally around him. You stammer “That.. that’s..”, “Yes sweetheart, what’s wrong ? You want more ? Am I hurting you ?” You shake your head, your vision blurring from the pleasure. You lay your head back, he strokes your hair. You feel him withdrawing from you. The empty feeling it leaves exasperates you to be honest. He closes your thighs, he asks you again what’s wrong. “M-My.. thighs.. I-I.. they.. a-are..”, he caresses your cheek, lying next to you, on his side, holding you close to him. Your cheek pressed against his chiseled chest. He tells you to focus on your breathing, he doesn't understand what's happening in the first place. When you finally manage to speak, explaining that something weird is happening in your stomach. He smiles “It’s normal my angel. It’s because of pleasure.” He gets back on his knees and leaves purple marks on the inside of your thighs, then your stomach, your breasts, your neck.

His pupils grow bigger looking at you so pretty, under his own body. You moaned his name, making him weak. You definitely have it wrapped around your finger. He resumes after asking you again, after you hold him close, wanting to keep his warmth, no matter if he's still inside you or not. You moan his name, not understanding what is happening. He feels himself reaching his climax, asking for permission to release inside you. The liquid flowing deep inside you warms you and makes you reach your second orgasm. Your thighs are trembling. He kisses you again, you grip the sheets but he gently removes your hands to make you hold him. “Even if you scratch me, princess, go ahead.” You stammer again, blushing “B-But.. I-I’m.. going to.. hurt.. you..?” He laughed kindly “It takes more than that to hurt me, I’m a pirate, I remind you.” He continues his deep, slow thrusts inside you. He kisses you all over and holds you close to help you. Pleasure is unknown to you. It comes in waves over your body, you tremble, eyes sometimes rolling back.

The fact that he goes so slowly and with you, triggers an orgasm never felt before in him, with any other woman. You pull him out of his thoughts and wipe his smile away when you try to sit back down. But impossible, with his weight on you and your thighs spread against his hips. You cry, looking towards where you are physically connected. Thinking he's hurting you, he's about to pull out but first asks you what's wrong. “T-The blood.. T-There.. is everywhere..” He takes your face in his hand “We don’t care about thaaaat sweetie. Enjoy, let yourself go !!!” He wipes your tears as you obey him.

He continues to caress your thighs with his hand, relieving you again and again. You're still shaking although less so, he lies on top of you, covering you. His warmth helps you, he kisses your collarbone gently. You heard the crew talking and laughing, drowning out your moans as he started again, still after asking you. You beg to kiss him, he smiles, wondering why it makes him so happy. This isn't the first time he's slept with a woman. Two orgasms for him, five to six for you. He strokes your hair “Do you want to do it again ?”, you nod. He takes the stained towel, carries you in his arms, to his bathtub. He turns on the light, closes the door, places you in his bathtub, you sit there, watching the blood flow out of you but mixed with his seed. Something makes you ashamed, you tell yourself that your Captain saw you completely naked and that you let him do that. He turns on the hot water and stands behind you after asking you.

He takes a hotter bath than usual but he does it for you. His voice pulled you out of your thoughts as you rested your head against the edge. He rubs your arms “Are your breasts better ? Will you allow me ?” You shake your head, he lays you against his chest, puts his hands on your breasts, massaging them gently. You asked him as he rested his chin on your shoulder. “Can we.. start again ?.. Please..” The fact that you speak to him so nicely makes him have the furious desire to make love to you properly but above all to marry you. “Yes doll, of course, you stay like that ?”, you nod, he lifts your thighs, putting your legs on the side of his. He slowly pushes himself into you, holding you by the waist. He presses your forehead to rest your neck against his shoulder. You try to relax in the water but you feel the blood flowing.

You moan his name, a little too loudly, so he laughs and puts his hand over your mouth. He would have loved to hear you but not this time, not like this. he prefers to keep it to himself “Just for me my love, not today”. You're embarrassed, you tell him as he bites your neck. “It’s.. weird..”, he smiles, “Ahhh, I’m shaking.. Shanks..” He places his hands on your lower stomach, feeling inside you “It’s normal darling.. Relax.” He holds your thighs because they're shaking really bad. As you moan, especially when you call him Captain, he relaxes inside you. You tighten around him so much, you're tight, he bites his lip. You fidget a little, bending your knees, apologizing. He shakes his head, pressing into your stomach to apply his heat. “Nooooo !!! No. Let it all go, baby, again. Carry on sweetheart.” You nod, feeling him throb inside you. He bites your neck when you say in a low voice “B-But.. the blood, there.. is.. everywhere..” He wraps his arms around your waist and rests your thighs like before. “Don’t panic goddess, relax again, come on.. There you go again.” You comply, moaning his name as his own orgasm is silent. Water still retains a lot of your blood. He whispers to you “Are you still in pain, beauty ?” You nod, he massages your breasts, your stomach. When you feel him cum inside you again, deeply, you tighten around him. “Don’t be afraid Y/N.. Shhhh..” You hold the edges of the bathtub “I’m right here angel. Just there. I've got you. You see ? I love you." Oh my God, how he could say two words so heavy with meaning. You stutter “Y-You.. love m-me ?..” He nods, continuing to massage you. “Don’t look, don’t lower your head.”

The water has turned cold, he presses his chest against your back to empty the bathtub. He refills it again, with slightly warmer water. He puts the soap he thinks you will like. Frothing the water, he takes a glove and scrubs you. Then he lifts you up to stand down and do the same for him. Wanting to savor the moment, he lays you back against his chest while you remained leaning against the wall of the bathtub, seeming to ruminate. “Are you okay honey ? You regret ?" You shake your head, he kisses your cheek “So, what’s going on ?” You ask him “What do you mean, how could you say “enjoy” to me ?? What next ??? Were you saying that wasn’t going to happen anymore ?”, he laughed out loud. Remembering that he told you that a few minutes earlier. “Not in that sense, pretty.. Enjoy the moment but don’t worry, I’ll make love to you all the time okay ?” You blush, embarrassed, he massages your back under the water. You say to him “I-I want.. to go out.. please…”, he drains the water and rinses you then wraps a towel around you. You sit on the edge as he does the same for him, around his waist. You look at his muscular chest, making you blush again. He kisses you then goes to get you some clothes. He squats down and puts on panties with the pad. He looks for a t-shirt of his own in his closet and puts it on you. You go straight to lie down, telling him you're tired. “Okay baby, I’m coming !!! I love you !!!"

He puts on a t-shirt, a pair of shorts, brushes his teeth then turns on his heater. He covers you and goes to get a glass of water to drink your medicine. He makes you drink it, sitting you back down then takes off his t-shirt and gets under the covers with you. Resting your head on his arm as he holds you close. You stroke his hair, looking at him so devoted and kind makes you want to marry him and have his children. He kisses you then you tell him “I’m hungry..” He immediately gets up, an open shirt on, kisses you on the forehead and goes to warm up what he finds in the fridge. When he returns, your stomach growls, making him laugh. He places the plate on your thighs, a pillow behind you. He sits next to you, looking at you. He asks you, as he tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear. “There’s always been something between us, right ?” You smile “I thought you did that out of the goodness of your heart, Captain ?” He smiles, preparing to answer you. You anticipate him “Or because you wanted..”, he understands that you are referring to the fact that he would have charmed you just to sleep with you. He doesn't get offended, not when it comes to you. So he answers you “No, no, no!!! Basically, I wanted to keep it to myself. You never told me anything or made me understand, so… I was too afraid to tell you, that it wouldn't be reciprocated and that you would tell me that you preferred to leave the ship. Or worse, never see me again.. But I’m in love with you.. There I said it !!!” You smile, continuing to eat, you tell him that you too. You thank him, getting up to go put them back in the kitchen. He’s holding you back “Huh ?? In this outfit ? No way !!!" He takes everything from your arms and goes out to put it down himself. He comes back, takes you to the bathroom to brush your teeth. He makes you laugh “The baby, it’ll be for next time ?” You nod, rinse your mouth, wipe and follow him as he held your hand, in his. He makes you lie down then tickles you to make you laugh. You laugh out loud, begging him to stop, otherwise you'll die of laughter. He stops, laughing “How pretty you look in my clothes.. love..” You thank him, and for the rest, he hugs you and covers you.

He falls asleep before you, wakes up after you too, finding you stroking his hair. “Hello doll !!” You smile, looking at him, intimidated. You stand up, he holds you by the waist, peppering your neck with kisses. You manage to get out of bed, making him sulk like a five year old. You shower, get dressed and convince him that you have to prepare food, that it's your turn. You do it, he gets out of bed, gets ready and goes to sit on the deck with his right arm. Chatting among themselves, you finish making food and eat first, you don't know why but you have a lot of appetite since the day before. You served everyone at the kitchen table and did the dishes. You get out and walk up to your Captain, his right arm stopping. Shanks looks at you, you spread your arms as Benn looks at you out of the corner of his eye. To tease you and take revenge for the morning, he says to you “Can you come back later ? I’m busy, sweetie..” You lower your head and respond “Okay..”, in a weak voice. You go back to the kitchen, asking Lucky if he can do the dishes later because you're feeling tired. He accepts, given that almost all of them know that you were on your period. You walk down the hall and burst into tears, you go into his room. You get into bed, lie on your side, cover yourself completely. It affected you too much, you think that if it starts this badly, there's no point in continuing. Then you think about it and start to think that he really just wanted to sleep with you and leave you. That now you are like the others, you are suffocating from crying.

For his part, Shanks tried to tell you to come back, that it was just to tease you. He storms back into his room, “Baby !!! I was joking !!!", "You sleep ?" He hears you sniffle, his heart tears in his chest. He removes the blanket, sits down “Nooooo love, don’t cry, don’t cry !!! I was joking, I swear !!! Didn’t you hear me ?? I told you to come back, I wasn’t serious !!!” You continue to cry, covering your face with your forearms. He wraps his arms around you “Nooooo, stop crying !!! You can’t be sad because of me !!!” In a jerky voice, you burst into tears again, apologizing for disturbing him. He shakes his head, frowning. “Nooo !!! NOOOO !!! You never bothered me !!! Y/N !!! I apologize !!! I didn't mean to hurt you !!! Do not Cry !!! Please sweetheart !!!” You apologize again, he pulls you onto his lap, wipes your tears, holds your chin. He kisses you everywhere and holds you as tight as he can. “Noooo doll !!!! I want cuddles too !!! All the time !!!!" He kisses you again and convinces you to go eat. “Hit me my angel !!! Come on !!! Avenge yourself !!"

You shake your head, hugging him closer. He rubs your back “I’m so sorry my princess, give me lots of hugs !!! Come on !!! Sweetheart, how could you believe I was serious !!! As if I was going to refuse or delay your affection ?! I’m an idiot but not that much !!” You keep crying, he's really sad and angry with himself. You're so sensitive, he knows it, he shouldn't play this kind of game with you. “Come eat beauty, I want to see what you have prepared..” Your voice is hoarse, because of the tears "I… ate..” He looks at you attentively, you tell the truth. “Okay darling.. Will you stay with me while I eat ?..” You shrug your shoulders, he kisses you “I’m sorry my empress, I didn’t mean to hurt you.. I love you, I want cuddles.. All the time from you.. I beg your forgiveness..” You nod, he carries you to the kitchen. Keeps you on his lap, compliments you on your cooking and holds you against him.

He didn't let go of you and kept you on his knees for weeks. Asking for cuddles, all the time. Of course, you forgave him, how else could you do it. Maybe a wedding and a baby on the way. Who knows ?

Enjoy - Do not copy or repost anywhere. Republish of course if you like it. I made edits on Tiktok too if you want to check 🫶🏻🫶🏻

[pcos-and-endo-awareness]

What’s YOUR personal experience with these disorders? :-)

Hello anon! I know I’ve made this post before but it’s buried somewhere. So here it is! Buckle up folks!

I always struggled with bad periods. Heavy flow, horrific cramps, irregular timing. I just thought that’s what it is and everyone deals with it. I figured the pain I experienced trying to use tampons was all in my head, some psychological fear due to my religious upbringing.

It wasn’t until college that I realized maybe my experience wasn’t normal. Maybe people aren’t supposed to be in this much pain. Maybe something was wrong. My pain got to be so overwhelming that I went to the emergency room. After a rather traumatic experience, I was eventually told that I had ovarian cysts and one of them had ruptured, and just go to my OBGYN and take some Advil. (Great advice, wonderful care. /s)

PCOS was in my family history, and my aunts and sisters all struggled with it. My then OBGYN diagnosed me with it, but basically said the same thing as the ER nurses. Take some ibuprofen and birth control and get over it. A diagnosis doesn’t do anything.

I had another episode with cysts about two years later, after I was out of college. I knew what it was this time, and I knew they’d only tell me the same thing. Take Advil and stop crying. So I didn’t bother going to the ER, and I tried to deal with the pain on my own. My (much nicer) OBGYN monitored the two softball sized cysts on my right ovary, and said we’d just keep an eye on them until they went away. That worked for a while, but not for long. One night my mother insisted on taking me to the ER because I was practically screaming in pain. After another traumatic visit, I was, you guessed it, told to take Advil and go home. It was probably another rupture.

Except it wasn’t. The next day I visited my OBGYN for an ultrasound so she could see what was going on. I was called back later that night and told to come in for emergency surgery. The cysts were torsing my ovary and cutting off the blood supply. Very scary situation, I’d never had a big surgery before. I was rushed in for the laparoscopy. This procedure usually takes less than a half hour. For me, I was on the table over two and a half hours. The reason being, not only did I have two huge cysts, but I was discovered to also have endometriosis. The cysts and all my organs had lesions, and everything was fused together. My OBGYN had to scrape the extra tissue from all my organs, she said it was the worst case of endo she’s ever seen, and I must have the highest pain tolerance ever to not be screaming my head off all day long. It was during this surgery I lost my right ovary, dead from having no blood supply.

Recovering from that surgery took me six months. It was brutal and at times, humiliating. My insides were raw and my muscles felt like goo. The only good thing to come out of it was meeting my lovely physical therapist, whom I still talk to today.

Today, five years later, I still deal with PCOS and endo. I have it mostly under control with the depo shot and many other medications. But… I struggle to lose weight, I have high blood pressure, I have major chronic fatigue, I’m at risk for diabetes, I still have migraines and flare ups and GI problems. My health is always going to be a problem for me. I am always going to be battling my hormones. I am going to struggle getting pregnant, if I even can. I am always going to have the risk of losing my other ovary and going into early menopause. I can only pray that these two disorders don’t take away more from me.

[snowandsage]

⚠️⚠️TRIGGER WARNING: ED, body image, depression, mental illness ⚠️⚠️

I would never in a million years post something like this to any of my other social media accounts but I’m proud of myself and how far I’ve come and want to make a post. It’s likely that this will be taken down for the “inappropriate photos” and I sincerely doubt that many will take the time to read this, but oh well. I’m writing this for me.

The purpose of this post is to share my story and spread awareness as well as positivity.

My body image is something that I have struggled with for a very long time now. Since middle school, I was overly aware of how my body looked and I developed severe body dysmorphia. I refused to wear bathing suits, I cried in the dressing room whenever I went clothes shopping, and I constantly compared myself to those around me. I hated my body and the way that I looked. This obsession with my appearance and my weight continued to progress throughout high school and even college. I began working out frequently, I logged my weight and everything that I ate for years, I counted calories, I would use a tape measure to measure my waste. At 15 years old, I would sob quietly to myself while looking at my body in the mirror. I would force myself to throw up after meals or when I felt like I overindulged. I wholeheartedly hated myself.

It wasn’t until my adult years that things started to get really bad. From 2021 to late 2022, I was at my absolute worst. I was in a bad place mentally and I was feeling out of control. As unhealthy as it sounds, my eating disorder was one of the few things that helped me feel in control of my life. I began weighing myself 4-5 times every day, my hair started falling out in large clumps, I began passing out almost on a daily basis (at home, at work, in the shower, in public), I was freezing cold all the time, i was chronically fatigued, and my body hurt and ached at all times. I was refusing to eat more than one full meal a day, and that meal typically consisted of a bagel with butter. I would look up the calories in ibuprofen before taking it, I started drinking my coffee black to avoid the calories from cream, I was constantly lying to my friends and family about my eating, I wouldn’t even let myself drink carbonated water because it made me feel bloated. I was so so so sick. Within one year, I had lost a total of 50 pounds, gone down 2 bra sizes, and had no longer fit in any of my clothing. I am a 6’3” woman and was weighing in at 124lbs when I decided that I needed to make a change if I wanted to live.

In November of 2022, I decided to actively work on getting better. I threw away my scale and called my doctor to get a referral to an ED program. I was advised to go completely inpatient considering the severity of my problem.

It’s hard. Every single day of this healing process has been hard for me. I have not once weighed myself since November and have been eating normal meals again. I refuse to let myself see the calories of the things that I eat and I’m pushing myself to break all of the unhealthy “rules” that I had previously made for myself. It’s obvious that I have gained quite a bit of weight since starting this journey, and although I still struggle with that and frequently have negative thoughts… I’m recovering and I’m trying. And that is all the matters.

I’ve slowly been learning to love myself with this new and improved body and I’m proud of myself for making it this far. I promise myself that I will continue to grow and heal even on days where I want to relapse or when I feel worthless or uncomfortable in my own skin.

I just recently learned some information that caused me to really, truly think about this terrible illness and how deeply and negatively it has, and always will, affect my life. About 3 weeks ago I wound up in the emergency department with severe heart palpitations, tachycardia, and vertigo. After doing an EKG and further testing, I was diagnosed with a rare heart condition in which can cause sudden fainting, seizures, or even sudden death. Unfortunately, one of the few things that can cause this, are eating disorders, more specifically anorexia nervosa. I wanted to throw up when I heard this. I didn’t realize how badly my ED could have been affecting my health. All that ever ran through my head was that I wanted to be skinny. I wanted to be thin because I didn’t feel worthy if I wasn’t. Surely, nobody would love me or want to see me naked if I wasn’t thin. What absolutely bullshit that is. I’m heartbroken for myself and I am so sad that I ever let myself get that bad. It devastates me to think about how many other people (men, women, young, old, etc.) struggle with eating disorders every waking minute of their lives. It isn’t worth it.

Please, please, please reach out to somebody if you are struggling with an eating disorder. You are so worth it and you deserve a chance at a happy and healthy life. You are SO much more than a number on a scale.

The first 5 photos are pictures that I took when I was at my unhealthiest and the remaining pictures are recent.