#i've got things going for the other prompts i've received i promise

[splinterclan]

One of my favorite things in Clan stories, Warriors and otherwise, is the set of language and rituals that develop to reflect Clan events. I love the wording of this warrior ceremony. It's markedly different from Warriors' "Do you promise to protect and defend your Clan, even at the cost of your life?" and I think this different wording reflects Whorlstar and SplinterClan's values really well! Can you talk about the thoughts that went into this ceremony wording, or other SplinterClan culture language-y things that have developed? Does SplinterClan have their own formal code, religious practices, or regular events akin to the monthly Gatherings?

(Side note: I was going back through the comic and found another AUGH foreshadowing moment I don't believe I've seen submitted yet. The consequences 😩)

this got long so under the cut fff

This is a really interesting question! I had a thought when I was writing the scene that I should go back and read a canon warriors ceremony, but then I actively decided not to. I think my goal with Splinterclan is to make them feel a little less dictatorship-y? Like obviously if someone wanted to leave the clan it'd be allowed, and they allow anyone to join so it makes no sense to make cats pledge their lives in service - and if running away meant living better Whorl would want any of them to do that.

Also giving room for the "code" and values to grow and change as the clan does. And, while she is their leader, it's much more of a community decision what they decide to do and Whorl very rarely "pulls rank". I kind of showed/said this when Myrtle wanted the clan to wait and see if Cedarheart would come back after he was taken away - Unless Whorl could get Myrtle to agree the clan likely would've stayed where it was since she's the matriarch of the clan basically jsjs

Otherwise my cats differ from canon in that Starclan is very hands off - Only Whorlstar can contact dead cats, only at the moonstone, and only ones who have given her a life (so currently only Silverspeck). So while everyone could theoretically receive a prophecy or sign, there's a lot more faith involved with believing it bc they get no real confirmation it exists besides a leader's nine lives until after death.

I haven't shown it, but the vigil after becoming a warrior is still a thing, and I assume if there were any other significant groups of cats living around they'd try to be on good terms with them and have meetings like a gathering. Also I've had the idea that Whorlstar goes to the moonpool after every cat's death and speaks with her guide to make sure they made it safely - also something I haven't shown bc I haven't had a good prompt in clangen to use and it technically wouldn't further the story. It's nice to think about though!

Other than that they communally raise kittens as I've shown (as in every single adult in the clan is expected to help clean/feed/watch them after their weaned, not just their parents) and it's probably been easy to tell that they live in and dig tunnels under/around the rocks of their camp, though I think Windclan does that? And idk what else is different bc it has been too long since I've read official warriors content jsjsj

[a-killer-obsession]

Can i please request 3 + 4 with some G 🙏 i really liked your kink headcanons about how wire is heats dom, could we maybe get a SO who is too sweet to degrade heat so wire guides them? Maybe even your take on what you mentioned about heat being into water sports if your comfy writing that 👉👈

Yeah fuck it, lets go. This turned into a bit of a Heat-kink-athon. I can't help it, I just love that man so much...

Guidance

Prompt: Degradation

Additional Tags: afab reader, she/her pronouns, safe words, praise kink, handcuffs, cock and ball bondage, sensory deprivation, fingering (reader receiving), impact play, squirting, foot fetish, ball crushing, watersports, face sitting, p in v sex, deepthroating, creampie, cumshot, threesome, aftercare

Foot stuff and watersports marked as between the *** so just skip that section if they're not your thing!

WC: 5.4k

Event Masterlist

🔞 Minors DNI 🔞

You'd been Heat's lover for close to a year now, and your sex life was great to say the least. His libido was far higher than you could manage, but you had an open relationship, not wanting to force him to give up sleeping with Wire when you knew the two of them had been friends with benefits for almost a decade. They didn't have romantic feelings for each other as far as you knew, but you knew a little of their sexual relationship, knowing that Wire was what Heat referred to as his Dominant, while Heat was his Submissive. Heat always came back from sessions with Wire covered in bruises and grazes, usually unable to sit comfortably from the ache in his asshole or the tenderness of his reddened rump. It made you cringe to see him hurt but you didn't say anything, you weren't going to yuck his yum, you knew he greatly enjoyed whatever it was he did with Wire and you weren't going to shame him for that. You just didn't really understand how someone could take pleasure from hurting anothet person like that though, especially someone they were supposed to care about, and it made you think differently of Wire. The two of them had noticed how uncomfortable you were with the tall man, especially after sessions, and it made both of them uneasy. The crew relied on trust to keep each other safe during battles, it wasn't good for you to not trust Wire.

“I think you'd understand if you took part,” Heat suggested.

“I don't want him to hit me!” You quickly replied, squirming out of Heat's hold.

“My flame, I'd never let anyone hurt you, you know that,” he crawled over the bed to take you back in his arms, the two of you still naked from a heated love making session. “I was more suggesting you play his usual role. In fact, I'd really like it if you did”

“I don't want to hurt you,” you pouted.

“I know to you it just looks like pain, but for me it feels really good,” he sighed, “I know you don't wanna hurt me, but I promise Wire knows my limits. If you let him guide you, you'll see for yourself how much I enjoy it”

“Is this… something you really want?” You asked softly, picking at your cuticles. Heat enveloped your hands in his to keep you from hurting yourself with the nervous tick.

“It is, I've wanted it since we first got together,” he replied surely, “but I didn't want to spook you. I know it can be… intense. It's not something you just jump straight into. But I trust you with my life, and I trust Wire. I need you to trust him too, this unease you have about him isn't good for crew dynamics. Just give it one chance, if you hate it I'll never ask you to do it again but hopefully you'll at least understand that Wire does what he does because I want him to.”

“Okay,” you relented, “I'll… give it a go. For you.”

“Thank you sweetheart,” he pulled you in close and kissed the top of your hair, nuzzling his nose against it, “it means the world to me for you to just try. I'll talk to Wire and get him to set it up okay?”

“Okay,” you replied in a small voice.

⋆★⋆★⋆★⋆★⋆

As per Heat's instructions, you climbed down the ladder to the hold and made your way through the empty cells at the agreed upon time. Heat and Wire were already down here, in what the crew referred to as the ‘Playroom’. Usually it was used for torture, but a few more hardcore members of the crew also used it for sex, Heat and Wire included. You'd never even been inside, and you knocked on the door nervously, dressed only in panties and a satin nightgown as you'd been asked to, as well as a set of strappy toeless heels that Heat had picked out. Wire called from the other side for you to enter, so you quickly slid inside, locking the door behind you, facing it anxiously. You slowly found the bravery to turn and look at the room, which was about what you expected. It was a mostly cold, metal lined room, with large hooks hanging from the ceiling and a table in the corner covered in what looked like various tools of torment, as well as some displayed on the wall. There were a few more sex-exclusive items as well, leather covered furniture in strange shapes you didn't recognise, currently pushed out if the way against a wall, as well as a comfortable three person couch, leather as well for easy cleaning. There was another table beside it, currently laid out with items like horse crops, leather paddles, various gags, dildos, lubricants, scissors and a stack of clean, soft towels, as well as a jug of water and several glasses.

Heat was in the middle of the room, naked with his wrists bound in cuffs, connected by a chain that was hung over one of the ceiling hooks, forcing him to stand. His cock was red and angry looking, erect and bound tightly in black ropes. There were thin red marks over his chest, likely from the crop, and he had a blindfold over his face, his thick wavy blue hair pulled up behind him in a high ponytail. You couldn't deny the shiver of excitement you got from looking at him, so vulnerable and excited for what was to come, squirming occasionally as he let out heavy breaths, the chains rattling above him as he fought the restraints.

Wire approached you slowly, not wanting to spook you, offering you a hand which you took nervously, letting him lead you to sit on the couch, Heat now directly in front of you. He offered you a glass of water and sat beside you as you drank.

“I know Heat has explained to you a little of what we do in here, and I'm sure by the marks I leave on him you have your own ideas,” Wire started, his voice deep and smooth, “I'm uneasy about your distrust of me, so I'm happy you're allowing me this opportunity to prove to you that I mean no harm to Heat when we have our sessions. I wanna lay some ground rules before we start though, okay? This is your first experience with BDSM, correct?”

“Yes,” you replied anxiously, practically chugging the water as your mouth went dry.

“I want to make it clear that today, you are in charge,” Wire explained, “I will be making suggestions, but you don't need to follow them, and you won't be punished for refusing. Understand though that I've been Heat's dom for a long time, I know his limits, I know what he enjoys, and we've spoken at length about what he'd like out of this. I won't suggest anything he can't handle or wouldn't want, my suggestions will all be with the intention of bringing you both pleasure. That being said, there are safewords that any of us can use. If something needs to stop and change, we can say ‘orange’. If something needs to stop altogether, we can say ‘red’. If you hear one of those words, you stop immediately, okay? As will I if I hear you or Heat say them. Use them to your advantage, okay? I don't want you feeling anxious because you didn't feel comfortable enough to speak up, nothing bad will happen if you use them. BDSM is about pain and pleasure, but it's also about trust, do you understand?”

“Yes,” you replied. He refilled your empty water for you before continuing.

“Right now, Heat has ear plugs in,” Wire explained, “he's entirely deprived of his sight and hearing, but if we need to stop there are signals I can use to communicate to him wordlessly, so don't worry about that. If you're ready, we can get started. Am I allowed to touch you? I'd like to show you how excited he is for this, but I'll need to touch between your legs. I won't be penetrating you today though unless you ask me to, just using my fingers okay?”

You nodded anxiously and put down your half finished glass, resting against the back of the couch. Wire slowly untied your satin robe, pushing it aside to reveal your breasts and panties, skin prickling and nipples pulling taut as the cool air hit them. He ran his hand slowly down your front, watching your face carefully for any signs of discomfort before his fingers threaded under the waistband of your panties. You were watching his hand slowly disappear under the fabric, breath hitching as his long fingers made contact with your folds, finding you already wet and wanting.

“Good girl,” he cooed, running his fingers between your labia and circling your clit, making you whine. He wasn't usually soft with his partners, but he was making a special exception with you, under Heat's firm order that he was to only be gentle when handling you. You weren't like them, you were soft and sweet and innocent, you didn't have an inclination for pain like they did. You moaned quietly as Wire dipped two fingers inside you, pumping you slowly, dragging his fingers against your spongy g-spot with every pull. It didn't take him long at all to work you up, his thumb circling your clit while his other hand fondled your breast, pinching your pert nipples delicately, just enough to make you whine. He'd hadn't intended to make you cum, but you were pent up from all the nervous anticipation, so he decided to get you all the way instead of just harvesting some of your honey as he'd originally intended to. Hopefully it'd help you relax as well before things got more intense.

“Good girl [y/n], let go for me,” Wire purred, curling his fingers and making come hither motions that had you quickly panting and cumming on his fingers. “There you go, just rest for a moment now okay? I'm gonna show you what I meant”

Wire pulled his slick covered fingers from your wet panties and approached Heat, making sure you were watching and could see well as he brought them to Heat's nose. You could see Heat's nose wiggle as he caught the familiar scent of your arousal on Wire's fingers, his cock twitching and his whole body writhing as he moaned your name wantonly. He searched for Wire's fingers with his mouth, greedily sucking your honey from them, running his tongue between the digits to get every drop of your essence. It made your pussy throb to see how Heat reacted to just the tiniest hint of your cum, and your thighs pressed hard together as you watched Wire pull his fingers from Heat's mouth with a pop.

“Come here sweetheart,” Wire suggested, and you stood with a small stumble, a little wobbly on your legs from your orgasm. You let your wet panties fall to the floor, feeling more comfortable without them on, but Wire pointed to them and made a clicking motion with his fingers to indicate he wanted them. You handed him the damp fabric and he held it in front of Heat, your boyfriend immediately burying his face in them like a hunting dog catching a scent, before greedily sucking on the fabric with a moan. “See what you do to him? You drive him wild,” Wire smiled fondly, pulling the panties away and discarding them on the floor.

“Can I kiss him?” You asked shyly.

“It's your session, you can do whatever you like,” Wire assured you, “but be gentle if you touch his cock while it's bound, it's very sensitive right now. I recommend giving him a few light touches as a reward”

You nodded and stepped forward, glad for the tall heels that allowed you to reach Heat's mouth easier. You ran your tongue over his bottom lip, and he quickly captured your lips with his own, hungrily devouring you and pressing his tongue against yours in a needy kiss, moaning into your mouth as you tasted yourself on him. His hips bucked towards you, so you let your hand run down his front, making him shiver, till you reached the rope at his base and ran a gentle index finger down the top of his shaft. He let out a long whine as you kissed him, and it made your thighs rub together to think such a small touch could drive him so wild. You touched him a few more times, running your finger down the topside of his cock like you were petting a small animal, feeling it twitch under your touch before you stepped back and watched him desperately try to seek you back out.

“[Y/N],” he whined, “come back, I love you, hnng, touch me more please”

Wire didn't miss the grin on your face as Heat begged for you, but was momentarily distracted by an alarm going off. He quickly silenced it before coming to stand in front of Heat, indicating for you to give him a little room. “What's the alarm for?” You asked curiously.

“Gotta take the ropes off his cock,” Wire explained, “they can't stay on for too long or the loss of circulation will cause damage”

Heat let out a harsh breath as his cock and balls were released from the restraints, Wire massaging them carefully to encourage blood flow before returning the rope to the table. “We'll leave these off for now, I don't want you to worry about the alarm going off all the time. Here,” he handed you a small leather paddle and you examined it carefully.

“Um.. how hard do I hit him?” You asked nervously. You were slowly warming up to the idea of hitting Heat now that you'd seen the intense pleasure Wire was already giving him, starting to trust that maybe Wire knew what he was doing.

“Come round to his back,” he guided you with a gentle hand on your elbow, “only hit the flesh of his ass or his thighs, but you can hit him as hard as you want. Go slowly though, you'll see why”

You raised a brow at the cryptic comment but moved to a comfortable position anyway, Wire pressed softly against your back in a way that soothed your anxiety, his breath brushing against your shoulder as he brought his chin to rest on it. His arms were around your waist as you made your first swing, the flesh of Heat's ass jiggling with the impact as you left a red, rectangular mark on his ass. He made a hiss and whined before letting out a stuttered “one.”

You turned a little in Wire's hold to raise your brow at him, and he had a proud smile on his face. “He's well trained,” he chuffed, “go to ten”

You laid out more hard smacks, spreading them over his ass and thick thighs, each smack followed by a whine and a count, his voice slowly becoming more strained as he struggled to keep count through the mixture of pain and pleasure. You could feel Wire's erection against your back, and you couldn't help but press yourself against it, your pussy throbbing with need. He made a little warning growl and held your hips sturdy to keep you from grinding on him, but with the way you were laying into Heat, standing in only your heels and open satin robe, he wanted nothing more than to ignore Heat and fuck you silly instead. This wasn't about him getting off though, this was about gaining your trust.

Heat was panting, moaning and fighting his restraints by the time you laid down your tenth smack, and Wire took your empty hand and encouraged you to run it over Heat's tender skin, making the bluenette shiver under your soft hands. “You did such a good job [y/n],” Wire cooed, “do you need to cum?”

You nodded eagerly and he had a shit eating grin as he walked to you stand in front of Heat. “I'm gonna bring him down soon so you can ride his face, but I want you to tease him a little longer okay? You're doing so good,” he cooed as his erection pressed against you again. You tried to reach back for it but he swatted your hand away, making you whine. “Hush now, I'll let you blow me later if you keep being so good, but right now we're focusing on you okay? Run your nails and tongue over Heat, kiss him if you want, you can touch his cock but not enough to make him cum okay? I'm gonna warm you up so you're nice and wet for him”

Wire gently tapped the inside of your ankles with his foot to indicate he wanted you to spread your legs, and he reached down to press his fingers right where you needed him, your legs almost buckling at the touch. You concentrated your horny energy into teasing Heat, pulling long strings of hisses, curses and moans from him as you flicked his nipples with your tongue, nipped and sucked his chest and neck, ran your nails over his sides and abdomen and gave him the occasional teasing pump of his cock, making him buck into your hand each time you touched him there. Meanwhile Wire pumped you with two fingers, your pussy making sloppy sounds as he got you good and wet. He decided he had a extra plan in mind but had no intention of edging you in the meantime, so he pumped you harder and rubbed your clit with his other hand, effectively pinning your against him and supporting your weight as you came hard, making Heat yelp as you suddenly bit his shoulder and moaned against him. Wire's harsh finger fucking had made you squirt, liquid pooling in his hand and splashing against the steel floor as your legs shook.

“Fuck, good girl [y/n],” Wire praised, offering Heat his hand to clean off, which Heat eagerly accepted, making sloppy sounds and drooling around Wire's fingers as he sucked and licked them clean, moaning the whole time. “Go drink some water and sit down for a moment sweetheart,” Wire pushed you gently in the direction of the couch, pressing a kiss to the top of your head, and you collapsed on the couch with a sigh and sipped at the rest of your glass of water. You watched while Wire reached up and unhooked Heat's chains from the ceiling, removing the cuffs from his wrists while he stood patently. Wire inspected his wrists and shoulders carefully, giving them a small massage that made Heat sigh. He tilted Heat's head up towards him and kissed him tenderly, and you watched with newfound arousal as their tongues mingled, Heat's hands resting on Wire's hips. Wire pulled one of the ear plugs from Heat's ear to check on him.

“Doing okay my love?” He asked. Oh, perhaps there was more between the two of them than you thought.

“Yeah, I'm good,” Heat smiled, “I might die if I don't cum soon though”

“Soon,” Wire hummed, “make her cum first and then I'll let you have her. I think she's well prepared for what we discussed”

“Yeah?” Heat's head titled like he was listening for where you were in the room, still blindfolded.

“Earplug is going back in, just a little longer,” Wire held his chin as he replaced the earplug, giving Heat one more soft kiss before shifting back into the rough dominant you more expected him to be. He walked behind Heat and grabbed his ponytail, pulling him to stand on a blue pleather gym mat at the other end of the room. Heat understood what was wanted of him and lowered himself first to his knees before Wire released his hair so he could lay on his back. A new set of cuffs with no space between them was added to his wrists, binding them together to rest over his stomach.

“[Y/n], come here sweetheart,” Wire cooed. You stood and stretched a little before walking over, and he indicated for you to stand in front of him, the two of you standing with feet either side of Heat's thighs, which were pressed together. His cock was soft now, but slowly twitching back to life knowing he'd get to taste you soon. “Do you know why Heat chose these heels?” Wire purred, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder again.

“Cos he thinks they're cute?” You replied unsurely.

“Because your toes are out,” he hummed, “but we'll get to that. Be a good girl and crush his balls for me would you?”

“Wire!” You yelped at the surprisingly forward request.

***

“Come now,” Wire chastised, supporting your weight with his arms around you as he hooked one of your ankles with his foot, guiding it to rest over Heat's cock. Heat whined at the light pressure and your brows raised. Wire's foot left yours to keep you both steady. “You don't have to go hard if you don't want to, but put a little pressure on him, rub your foot over his cock and balls, I promise he likes it”

Heat's whines and his hips rolling to rutt against your shoe agreed with Wire's sentiment, and you curiously stroked his cock with the sole of your shoe, occasionally putting pressure against his testicles. He groaned as you experimentally pressed the sharp stiletto heel against his cock, making him whine out your name, and making arousal pool at your core. Wire had a shit eating grin feeling the way you shuddered pleasantly at Heat's whining, knowing full well he'd just awakened something in you. You pushed harder against Heat and precum leaked from his cock, pooling against his abdomen.

“He's been so good, you should give him a reward,” Wire suggested, “put your shoe in his mouth”

You didn't understand the appeal but if Wire knew that's what Heat wanted then you'd do it, wanting to give Heat your all. He made a sad little whimper as you released the pressure on his cock, quickly replaced by a surprised moan as you tapped your shoe against his mouth. He eagerly opened for you, sucking on the end of the shoe as you curiously shifted it in and out if his mouth. More precum was leaking from him as his hips rolled, bucking against nothing, his bound hands coming up to grab your ankle so he could hold your foot still, pushing his tongue between the shoe and your toes to separate them so he could take your toes in his mouth. You were glad for Wire holding you steady as the ticklish feeling made you squirm.

“Fuck, [y/n],” Heat moaned as he released your foot, “let me taste you, please”

You looked back at Wire as though asking permission. “You're in charge here, if you think he deserves it then go ahead”

“I um… I want to but..” you shuffled uneasily.

“Need to pee?” Wire whispered knowingly in your ear, his hands travelling further and pressing against your bladder, making you whine. “Do it then”

“Wireeeeee,” you complained.

“I'm not gonna force you, you can go upstairs to pee and come back if you want,” Wire assured you, rubbing your belly, “but you should know that he wants it. Like, really wants it. You've done so good already though, he won't be upset if you don't want to do it”

“Oh.. okay…” you relented quietly, still determined to give Heat the best time you could. You said you would try, so you were gonna do your damn best, even if you felt squeamish about it. You'd felt squeamish about this whole experience, but thus far you'd only found yourself enjoying it. “What do I… I mean where…”

“I'll hold you steady,” Wire hummed, “he wants it on his cock”

“Okay,” you replied anxiously, pulling off your silk robe and tossing it aside, not wanting to get it dirty. “Are you sure?”

“Positive,” Wire replied firmly. “We do this all the time. I know you probably feel really anxious and embarrassed right now, I think everyone probably does the first time, but think of it sort of like marking your territory. Claim him as yours, claim his cock, make sure everyone knows who it belongs to”

When he put it like that you sort of understood the allure, so you let him support your weight as you squatted over Heat, leaning back a little and spreading your labia with your index and middle finger. It took a few moments to relax enough to let yourself go, but you couldn't bring yourself to actually watch yourself pee on Heat short of making sure your aim was right, that was too much for your little heart. That was at least until he registered the hot liquid hitting him and started to let out feral sounding growls mixed with moans that sounded like he might cum at any moment, writhing underneath you. “Fuck, fuck,” he whined, prompting your eyes to open and watching his hips raising off the mat to meet your stream. You let out a stuttered whine as you finished, Wire cooing praises in your ear and running his hands over your abdomen and breasts, rolling your nipples pleasantly between his fingers.

***

“Look at him,” Wire cooed, “look how good you're making him feel”

You whined as you looked down at Heat, his bound wrists reaching desperately for you. He caved on behaving and sat up, feeling around and crying out for you till he found your leg, following it up and burying his face in your cunt. You moaned and your knees buckled as he lapped at it, vibrations from his own moans making your pussy tingle. Wire pushed you forward, forcing you to your knees and taking Heat with you, his arms sliding under you and pressing against your back to press you forward, till he was flat on his back with you sitting on his face. You barely registered Wire cleaning up your mess behind you while you gripped Heat's hair and rode his tongue, the two of you moaning in unison. Heat had you riding his face on the regular so you were well practised at this part, eyes closed and head thrown back as Heat bullied his tongue inside you.

Meanwhile, satisfied with the good-for-now cleaning job, Wire stripped his clothes and settled himself on the couch, stroking himself while he watched Heat eat you out. He was looking forward to stretching that pretty mouth of yours, but he would wait patiently until Heat had made you cum first. Which, to be fair, didn't take long at all. Heat knew exactly what he was doing and what you liked best, and soon you were gushing on his face with your head thrown back and a goofy fucked out smile on your face as you pulled on his ponytail.

“One more sweetheart,” Wire cooed as he helped you off Heat, getting you to kneel on the mat next to Heat, who whined at the loss of your cunt. You nuzzled against Wire's cock, making him hiss as you put kitten licks up and down the base.

“Can I have it?” You asked him so sweetly, god the look you were giving him made him want to watch you choke on his cock.

“In just a minute baby, you've been so good,” he ran his thumb over your chin, letting you suck on it. “Just gonna get Heat in the right place first, kay?”

You pressed your tits down against the mat and put your ass in the air eagerly, Wire noting with pride your submissive pose. Man, he was gonna have fun ordering the two of you around in future, already thinking of all the ways he could use you both to tease each other. He grabbed Heat by his hair, pulling him to his knees and turning him to face you. You backed into him till your ass pressed against his front, notably clean and dry thanks to Wire's efforts, and the second Heat registered your soft flesh against him, it was like something snapped in his brain. His bound hands scrambled desperately at your back until Wire freed him, his cock bucking towards you trying to find your entrance till his hands were able to grab your hips and allow him to slam into you, knowing from experience exactly how to angle himself to bury himself inside you, making you scream.

He was like a rabid animal as he fucked you hard, finally getting the pressure he needed on his cock with your wet warmth after what felt like an eternity of teasing. Wire knew it wouldn't take long for Heat to cum now that he was buried inside you, so he fisted himself a few times before lifting your chin to look at him. You opened your mouth for him, realising you were finally getting what you wanted, and Wire's thick cock stretched your mouth to its limit, the corners of your mouth stinging from the strain. You did what you could to balance yourself on one hand while Heat was brutally slamming into you so you could stroke the base of Wire's cock, taking what you could of his impressive length in your mouth as deep as you could. You gagged as he hit the back of your throat, holding your hair and chin tight as he slid himself in and out of your mouth, slower pace contrasting with Heat's merciless pounding.

Your moans were vibrating Wire's cock, spurring him on and making your eyes water, Heat's pace starting to get messy and erratic as he got close. He reached around you and rubbed hard circles on your clit, making you let out a muffled scream around Wire's cock as you came hard. You saw white and your body turned to jelly, Heat holding your hips up while your hand fell away uselessly from Wire's cock, giving yourself over like a ragdoll for the two of them to use you for their own pleasure.

Heat was no surprise the first to cum, unbearably pent up from all the teasing, seeing stars as he slammed into you till every last rope of cum was deposited inside you, collapsing against your back as he panted. Wire came soon after, stilling deep down your throat, your nose pressed against his pubes, unable to breathe while hot cum flowed down your throat before he pulled out with a satisfied groan and gave your face a little appreciative slap, lletting you take a much needed breath. You and Heat collapsed against the mat, a pile of panting limp noodles, his chest warm and comforting against your back as sweat pooled between the two of you and made your skin sticky.

You were in a fucked out daze as Wire took care of the two of you. For your part he mostly just removed your heels, cleaned you up, put your robe back on and sat you back on the couch, forcing a fresh glass of water into your hand. You sipped at it while you watched him take care of Heat, running a damp cloth over his body and massaging his sore muscles, the blindfold and ear plugs now removed as Wire sat cross legged on the ground and Heat leaned back against him. He looked at you with a half lidded smile, full of affection.

“I love you,” he mumbled sleepily while Wire worked a knot out of his shoulder, making him groan. You giggled sleepily, slipping off the couch and crawling over to rest your head against his thigh, essentially forming a cuddle pile with the three of you, sighing contently as he scratched your scalp soothingly.

The whole session had certainly had the intended effect, you no doubt trusted Wire a great deal more now. And hey, maybe this whole BDSM thing wasn't so bad after all…

[siilvan]

sun showers

characters: kyle "gaz" garrick

summary: gaz warms you up after you get caught in the rain.

prompts: 2. "do i make you nervous?"

genre: fluff, very light angst, roommate!gaz, fem!reader (no desc.)

warnings: semi-proofread, light cursing, brief references to canon-typical violence, like one innuendo at the end lol

word count: 1.5k

note: learned about gazfest and proceeded to speed-write a drabble-fic to celebrate :) big shoutout to @glitterypirateduck for curating this!

wrote half of this in one day and the other half the next. the quality drop is very obvious lol. i promise i've got better gaz fics planned for the future </3

"y'look like you just went swimming."

you slam the front door behind you, dropping your bag on the floor unceremoniously as you glare daggers at your roommate. kyle is lounging on the sofa, hot cup of tea in hand, sending you an amused look after tearing his eyes from the television.

"there wasn't any rain in the forecast today," you grumble in response, kicking off your sopping wet boots. you can see kyle set his mug on the table and rise from his spot, casually strolling into the small kitchen you shared. you figure he's going to grab a snack for himself and ignore him before trudging to your room to change clothes.

when you emerge again, in dry clothes and with a slightly better attitude, you're immediately greeted by your designated mug sitting on the countertop, filled nearly to the brim with steaming tea. you glance over and see kyle standing at another counter, busying himself with building a small plate of snacks, quietly humming a random showtune under his breath.

you carefully pick up the cup and take a sip, a comfortable warmth flowing through you, chasing away the bone-deep cold that you couldn't seem to shake even after arriving home. your eyes squeeze close briefly as you revel in it, and you miss the way he glances at you with a smile on his lips.

"figured you could use a little pick-me-up," kyle says, catching your attention. he brushes past you gently, carrying the plate to the coffee table and setting it down. "c'mon, you're probably still freezing." he adds, patting the spot next to him after sitting on the couch again.

"sometimes i forget how sweet you are." you shake your head and settle in next to him, carefully lifting your cup as he tosses a blanket over your legs.

he turns whatever show he was watching back on - some history documentary, you realize - and munches on one of the cookies from the plate, quietly relaxing next to you. you, meanwhile, are sipping on your tea, split between paying attention the show and watching him from the corner of your eye.

moments like this were truly rare for you two, despite your living situation. you came home at the end of every day, but for kyle, that wasn't a guarantee. he'd be gone for weeks, sometimes months, at a time, leaving you to care for your flat until he returned. you've never said it aloud, but you've grown to dread him leaving. the place felt lonely without him, like there was something important missing.

the way he reassures you before leaving and the check-in texts you receive daily while he's gone makes you think he knows already, despite you never saying a word to him about your feelings. he's attentive to a fault - you wouldn't be surprised if he knows you just as well as you know yourself.

"you okay?" his voice interrupts your train of thought suddenly. you jolt, almost spilling your tea, and hastily set it down on the table before turning to him. kyle's gaze is already on you, and your eyes quickly dart anywhere but his face as a warmth slowly creeps up the back of your neck.

"yeah, of course." you wave him off, pulling the blanket closer around yourself. "just chilly, is all. i'm already starting to feel better."

he hums, and you can still sense his gaze on you when he goes quiet. you desperately avoid eye contract, electing to stare at the television whilst not comprehending a single thing on the screen. anything to convince him that you're not having an internal war over whether you like him as a roommate or as something more.

a minute passes, and you think he's dropped it. until his voice, dropped to a near whisper, suddenly speaks right next to your ear.

"do i make you nervous?"

you jump, again, and whip your head around to look at him. kyle's leaned in close, a kind yet nervous smile on his lips, his arm swung over the back cushion to face you properly.

you quirk a brow at him. "nervous?" you ask, gaze finally flicking up to meet his. "no, not at all. why?"

he shrugs his shoulders and chuckles, visibly relaxing at your reply. "i don't know, i just– i'm not here often, i guess. didn't know if i was overstepping or something." he waves his free hand as he talks, trying to find the right words.

"kyle, you're probably the person i feel the safest around." you remark, scooting just a bit closer to him to emphasize your point. well, and to steal some of the heat radiating off him.

"i get that you feel safe, but–" he drops his hand to his side and sighs. "maybe i'm misunderstanding, but you looked like you felt off. just wanted to check in."

tell him, your brain shouts at you, seeing the opportunity. he already knows, all you'll be doing is giving him the reassurance that he always gives to you. the worst thing he can say is no; you'll lose your best friend and have to find a new place to live if he rejects you. that isn't a terrible risk, right?

except, it is. you worry the inside of your cheek and leave the comment hanging in the air for far too long. just as kyle opens his mouth to say something, you interrupt him.

"i don't like when you leave for work," you start, hands fidgeting in your lap. "the apartment feels empty without you– i feel empty without you. i was thinking about that and how much i'll miss stuff like this when you leave again."

for a moment, he just stares at you. it doesn't help with the nerves at all, and you mentally squirm under his scrutiny. your discomfort seems to snap him back into the present, though. kyle's face lights up, practically beaming with joy as he finally responds.

"i'm not going anywhere, not right now." he cups your cheek when you attempt to look away, keeping your focus on him with gentle fingers holding your head in place. "i hate leaving you. if i could be in two places at once, i'd be here around the clock. seeing your smile fall every time i walk out the door hurts like nothing else."

you stifle a small laugh and place your palm over his. "kyle, you've been shot. pretty sure that hurts worse than seeing me sad."

he purses his lips, thinking, before making a noise of disagreement. "ah, think i'd rather take a bullet than see you cry." he counters with a pensive nod, sending you into a fit of bemused giggles.

when you manage to compose yourself, mouth split in a wide grin, you meet his gaze again. kyle's mirroring your expression, though his attention is very clearly elsewhere. his eyes narrow, head dipping ever so slightly as his eyes flit between your own and your lips. it's a subtle gesture, a quiet way of asking for something without pushing you in any particular direction. your tongue darts out to wet your lips, an action that he watches with great interest, and you take in a calming breath before making your next move.

you lean forward, hands finding purchase on his shoulders, and press a kiss to his barely-parted lips. he hesitates for a moment, taken aback, but the reluctance is short-lived as he responds in kind, his hand sliding from your cheek to wrap around the nape of your neck. he pulls you in closer as his unoccupied arm slides off the back cushion, snaking around your waist.

the kiss was saccharine sweet from the start, but as you both pour every pent-up emotion you've suppressed into it, it almost becomes too much.

keyword: almost. it's not enough to make you want to stop.

kyle pulls back just enough to talk a few seconds later, resting his forehead against yours. "that, uh... you have no idea how long i've been dreaming about this." he mutters, chuckling.

"dreamed about anything else?" you ask, lips ghosting over his. he leans in to the featherlight touch, chasing it, forcing you to tilt back with an amused huff. he groans under his breath and straightens his back, giving your words some thought.

"yeah, loads of stuff. about you, though?" he pauses, clicking his tongue as he recalls the aforementioned dreams. "not sure if you're ready to hear those yet. most of 'em are probably best saved until after a proper date."

"there's going to be a date, then?" you ask, draping your arms over his shoulders.

with a lighthearted roll of his eyes, kyle nods. "'course there will. several dates, if you'll have me long enough." he presses a lingering kiss to your lips, muffling your pleased hum.

your reply is a mere whisper fanning against his skin. "i'll have you as long as you're around. i'm already yours."

taglist: @sofasoap, @rohansregret

[hotxcheeto]

I remember you having a Rachel Amber strap-on prompt in your brainrot list. I've come requesting it >:) How about a shy female reader with a hidden love for adult toys using them on Rachel? I love your work btw :)))

━ 𝐀𝐂𝐂𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐋 𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘

𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜(𝙨) - Rachel Amber x Fem!Reader

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 - Smut, mentions of kissing, strap on use + v penetration ( rachel receiving ), best friends to something?, cursing

𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙤𝙛𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙 ? - Yeah/Nope

𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙧'𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙚 - thank you!!

There were garments riddled along the ground, Rachel standing half in your closet while tossing things that she deemed 'deplorable' to fashion behind her.

She was purging your closet and there was no way you were stopping her.

She'd gained a look in her hazel eyes that told you she was determined to get to the bottom of each pile of clothing you had. Taking things and tossing them into different piles that she had labeled in her mind all while you sat and watched her.

Laying on your stomach while resting your hand in your palm. All the while she was battling it out with ugly patterned shirts and the many pairs of sweatpants you owned.

"God, you have no clue about any trends these days. It's truly a pity."

It was Rachel, you had to expect the dramatics.

"A pity? Who do you think I am?" You joked, rolling onto your back and putting your arm over your eyes. "Someone with the worst fashion taste I've ever seen."

You snorted, listening to her continue to rummage and mutter to herself. The sounds of shirts and jeans being thrown are the only other sound besides your breaths. You were beginning to wonder what you'd be wearing for the rest of the week judging by how much she planned on donating and selling.

The rustling slowed and it seemed she'd found a target, a few grunts coming from her before she rattled the door and stepped back.

"What's this?" You tilted your head up at that, watching her shake a black shoebox that instantly made your stomach drop and your heart fall to your ass.

Fuck.

You had about three seconds to decide if you were going to absolutely snatch it away and throw it out your window for the squirrels to find and spend the rest of your life denying what was in it.

Or...

let her open it and see the horrors that awaited her on the other side of the cardboard lid that had looked like it'd seen better days.

Times up.

You got up faster than she'd ever seen you move, she wasn't even sure you'd ever walked that fast in your life. The box in your hands before another breath had come in or out of her lungs and it was slammed onto your desk and behind your back in an instant.

"It's personal." Your cheeks burned, blush invisible, but hot. Yours ears as well while you avoided looking her in the eyes and instead looked at the ground. "Personal?" "Yeah."

It was like a showdown, and you weren't letting her pass.

"C'mon, can't I get a peek? I'm your best friend after all."

"Nope. Can't guilt trip me into this one Rach."

Again, there was a tense silence that made you feel like you were doomed.

"What kind of freaky shit you got in there?" Her voice peaked with curiosity as she got closer, giggling while you backed up impossibly closer to the desk. "Seriously, it can't be that bad."

Oh it was.

"Just drop it Rachel." For a moment the girl hesitated, noticing how serious you actually were. Your voice quiet, even a bit timid. "Please?"

Her head tilted, arms crossing.

"Is it torture devices? Drugs? Sex toys? Whatever it is, I promise I won't make fun of you. I promise Y/n/n." You didn't move, you didn't even fucking blink and she began to get slightly worried that you had some ones chopped head in that thing.

"No." For a moment Rachel wondered if she should give it up and let you take this one. But she was never one to back down from a challenge, licking her bottom lip.

"Can you at least tell me what's inside? I won't see it, but can I at least know?" Your mind wasn't sure how bad it'd be if you actually told her about the shit you had hiding in the hole of your closet.

"It's just... bed stuff." Her eyebrow raised. "Bed stuff?" "Yeah."

She was very unimpressed, and even a bit more curious than where she'd begun when you'd first snatched the box in the first place.

"Is it your vibrator? I'm pretty sure everyone has one."

You looked away from her, giving away at least one of the items in the container that she was now even more curious to open. Stepping a bit closer as your guard fell in just the slightest at the mention.

Rachel then made her move, smacking the box to the side before you got the chance to stop her or the box from taking a slight tumble. The lid flew at you in hopes of distracting you and out came everything you'd been trying to hide, a slight yelp escaping your throat at the flying lid.

"Whoa." Was all you heard her say, the sudden need to hide and scream crashing over you like a ton of bricks.

Out came a vibrator which she'd been guessing had been in there the entire time. But there was a lot more that she hadn't guessed. Like the giant dick she pulled out that had a harness attached, the girl looking at you for answers while you'd practically collapsed against your wall in horror.

"No fucking way someone has used this on you."

"They haven't." You said, unable to choke the syllables back into your mouth. "No fucking way." She repeated, turning around and raising her eyebrows. "No fucking way, Y/n." You couldn't look at her, staring at the ground with wide eyes.

"You used this on someone!"

"Tell the neighbors, why don't ya."

Rachel continued looking through the box before it fell to the floor and your glittery strap-on was the only thing left in her hand.

"Is it clean?" You looked at her with an emotion that was nearly indescribable. "Yes it's fucking clean." Rachel nodded, looking it over.

"It's cute."

You wanted to implode, covering your face with your hands before moving to collapse on your bed. Not even caring what she did with the thing anymore, you were beginning to believe that breathing was overrated.

The bed dipped not a few seconds after, Rachel's head appearing right beside where yours was pressed into the mattress. Her finger lightly tapping your cheek.

"I didn't know you were into such... things." She giggled, rolling onto her stomach while still trying to peak at your face. "Is it popular with the ladies?"

"Rachel." You moved onto your back, still covering your face with your hands. "Just go home." There was no other choice, you were going to have to move to another country in order to avoid her for the rest of her life.

"But what if I wanted to see what all the fuss was about?" Your hands slammed onto the bed, your face showing clear shock. "I mean, it's huge... you must be popular with the ladies."

You wanted to be popular with the grim reaper.

"Rach?" She grinned at the sound of her nickname, sitting up to lean down towards your face. "You've used it before haven't you?" You paused, almost questioning if what she'd asked was rhetorical. But nothing else came from her lips,

Rachel wanted an answer.

"Yeah..." You responded. Her nail traced your cheekbone. "Like who?" You felt like you were on fire, swallowing hard and watching her focus on her hand. Finally giving you a break from her stare.

She actually wanted you to say it.

"I dunno... my ex?" You said, almost as a question while raising your eyebrow. "Hm.. what about that girl you liked from that art seminar we went to?" You felt your gut swallow up at the mention of her. "Or, that other one from that psych class we took together?"

She paid a lot more attention to your fun times then you realized.

"How good were they?" Rachel's nail continued to trace down your neck, then towards your ear while moving up and around, all while speaking. You were practically hyper focused on the touch, unaware of your lost in headlights appearance.

"Hm?" Then your attention was back on her.

"Okay.. I guess." Your mouth finally parted to answer, tongue then moving over your lips in a nervous reaction to her receiving that news. "Did you like it?" "I mean... at the time."

Rachel moved to sit up once more, pushing her hair off her shoulders and kneeling in front of your pillows. All the while feeling you get up and turn to look at her.

"What-"

"I want you to fuck me with it."

You almost dropped dead and you swore you felt the presence of something supernatural in the room that was coming to take your soul. Your tongue suddenly blocking your throat from making more than a gargled gurgle for speech. This was your best friend.

"Why-"

"Because I wanna know if I'm your best. That and... I wanna see how good you are with that. Y'know, like I've heard from your exes."

You wondered how much else they'd told her, and if she could see you nervously shifting your weight from foot to foot. Or the fact that your throat was so dry you could cough up a cactus.

"You're a little too dressed for that." You were surprised at your own response, standing at the end of the bed with a keen eye resting on her. You wanted to look away though, but it was nearly impossible to not stare right at Rachel Amber.

"Look at you." She slowly smiled, pulling her top up from the bottom, quickly revealing her black bra to you while throwing the item in her hand. "All bossy now." Her hands moved down to her jeans, unbuttoning and unzipping them all the while you only respected the art.

"Feeling slightly lonely here, Y/n/n." She sang, squirming from her bottoms as you began to undress down into your underwear. Hand wrapping around the harness of the strap-on while she finally moved to unclip her garment, moving it aside.

And God did she look amazing, her golden skin tone reached down past her neck. Her breasts on display for you, and you only to see as you move on your bed towards her. Her nipples slowly rising as the cooler air circled her, her body leaning backwards as you crept closer.

"You're really pretty." You whispered, sounding a bit like a love-sick fool, though Rachel didn't really seem to mind. "I could say that about both of us." She agreed, deciding she liked both herself and you with less clothes on.

"Are you sure about this?" You interrupted her thoughts, looking down at the bare space between her thighs, you didn't know when she'd stripped from her undergarments, but they were in fact gone.

"I've never been more sure about anything." Was her reply, spreading her legs, opening her glistening cunt to you while you tried not to choke on your own saliva and make it less obvious you couldn't tear away your gaze from her entire existence.

"But won't it be weird after?" She rolled her eyes. "Doesn't every girl have sex with her best friend at least once?" You adjusted yourself as the question poured from her lips, the tip of the fake dick accidentally brushing and pushing against her clit making her let out a warm noise.

"Besides," She continued, reaching down to align yourself with her. "you feel really good and I really want you." Ignoring your burning face and body, you nodded your head and took a deep breath while allowing her to lubricate the cock with herself. Her pupils never tore away from yours while she did so.

"Now just please fuck me, Y/n/n." The sound of your nickname in her sweet voice made you comply so quick it was slightly embarrassing.

The strap slipped in, your eyes locked to the way it disappeared inside of her, moving your hips back and forth in awe. All the while she was trying not to claw at your body, admiring your face and almost wishing she could take a photo of your pussy whipped face.

"More, fuck, more." Your confidence was gaining at your pace, your hands moving down to grip at her hips and thighs while spreading her further. Soft moans slipping out one after another while she reached towards you to grab any part of you that she could.

Settling on your forearms, Rachel watched the way you disappeared inside her again and again, slipping a bit deeper each time. Her juices lathering the silicone and making it easier and easier to fuck her into your pile of pillows.

"Oh shit-" No girl sounded like Rachel, or looked like her for that matter. At least not to you. Rachel Amber was one of a kind, your best friend in the entire world, and now she was the pretty girl getting dicked down in your bedroom by you.

"I k-know w-what you're thin-thinki-ing-" She whimpered, whining when you pulled her closer. "I'm sure you do, Rach." You giggled, acting as if this was just another sleepover with you both.

She wiggled and squirmed in her spot, head falling back as you continued to slam your hips into hers. Skin on skin echoing against your walls and surely tumbling out the window at the same time.

Her nails dug into you, much different from her earlier light, feather touches. Not that you minded, looking at her painted fingertips create little half moons on your flesh.

"Fuck, Rach." She nearly came at the sound of your voice, focusing on your face with everything she could. She wanted to memorize how pretty you looked while deep inside her.

"Any of your exes as good as your best friend?" She asked out of breath as you wiped your forehead, her hand moving down to play with herself. "Huh?"

When she met your eyes they were darker, more focused and a much amount of boldness had infected them.

"Fuck no." You said swiftly, pushing her legs back and pressing them against her causing her to cry out. "Never."

"Don't stop- fuck- m'gonna-" You nodded down to her, allowing Rachel to pull you down and press her forehead against yours. And you began wondering, as she did this, if you were still going to be best friends after you got done making her come on your fake cock.

"Go ahead Rachel... I wanna see you." She herself blushed at your comment, but nothing but blabbered noises followed in response.

Then came her moans that suddenly got much louder, turning into high-pitched noises that sounded pornographic as you listened to her. Smiling to yourself, lips ghosting over hers but you didn't actually kiss her.

That might be too far.

And as you thrusted back and forth, slowing your pace to calm her and yourself down, you thought she was so gorgeous with her half lidded eyes and messy hair.

"Was it what you thought it'd be?" You asked her, backing up and resting your hand against her knee. The other moving to massage her lower belly while she tried to calm her pounding heart.

"You have hella hip game." You tried not to laugh while pulling out of her, rubbing her thigh to make the exit easier on her. Though, she still made a noise at the sensitive emptiness.

"I try." The overbearing suddenness of the empty room mixed with the bareness of you both was nearly breathtaking.

"You just had sex with me and you're still being awkward?" She said, teasing more as you groaned, unclipping the toy and dropping it aside to clean later.

"Well what if you don't wanna be friends with me cause my dick game sucks then I have a reason to be awkward." She playfully slapped your arm as you said this, pushing her golden hair backwards.

"I think your dick game is pretty good, but I need to make sure you don't kiss like a fish." The impending doom feeling suddenly came back at full force, after all of this, you still wanted to faint.

"I mean..." She leaned upwards, her breath warming your mouth. "I don't think I kiss like a fish." You finished in a whisper.

"I'll be the judge of that."

Rachel Amber would be the death of you.

[waatsoned]

GOT7 | WINTER HEPTAGON (2025)

sentence prompts taken from got7's album, winter heptagon. enjoy!

PYTHON

i never play with feelings, but i thought you were committed.

in every moment, you're always there.

i gave you my time when i didn't have much.

i'm touring the world, but i'm missing the one who held it down.

music is how i've been venting now.

i wish i could let you go.

i wish i could say goodbye.

i don't wanna lose her.

she was my future.

SMOOTH

let's skip the talking and set the groove.

just feel your body and let it loose.

baby, take it off, go and drop that weight.

i'ma walk it off and just do my thing.

baby, you're floating, come and ride on my wave.

i need a little bit, just want a taste.

OUR YOUTH

i remember when we first met, i felt it at first sight.

it's okay, don't worry, we're together.

wherever we go, let's go all the way.

now, come and take my hand.

hold on tight.

even if it's reckless and clumsy, i'll do it first.

anytime, anywhere, even in another universe.

let's run to our happy ending.

REMEMBER

today is a happy day, it's perfect.

remember thе first day we held hands?

remember the days we went out together?

remember all the times we overcame together.

i want to see you with my heart that carries all the words i couldn't say.

will you stay by my side all night?

will you lean on my shoulder?

i just want you.

DARLING

can you be my darling?

every day with you is special.

i'm gonna be with you anytime.

be the director of my aimless imagination.

you make mе real, we can't be morе near.

when i take a break, i want to hear your voice, so i call.

your words on the other end of the receiver, i find myself smiling secretly.

TIDAL WAVE

summer came and went, and i spent all of it alone.

i'm weak and no surprise, you're still my kryptonite.

pinching myself because i can't stop the dreams of you and i.

you coming through, or should i come your way?

i can't sleep 'til I see your face.

all these thoughts of you come out the blue.

you're my tidal wave, i get swept away.

feels like home when you're here.

feels like war when you're away.

i'm stuck here thinking about us.

OUT THE DOOR

back in september, i would leave flowers at your door.

wish we felt like we did before.

if love is true, it shouldn't hurt this much to be falling.

i thought i gave you all that you wanted.

you don't want me to stay, but you don't want me to go.

why do you play these games?

you don't want me to change, and you don't want me to go.

you'll be counting the days since i walked out the door.

if all that we had was еnough like you promised, my lonely heart wouldn't feel so forgotten.

give me some space, see your face, every place that i go.

can't escape, can't erase, get away from you.

i gave you all my love but you broke my heart up anyways.

i know you're hurting too, and still thinking of me.

HER

you got me smiling even though i can't see you.

you got me falling even though you're not falling for me.

now, we seem to be speaking different things.

i can't forget what you said.

the moment our eyes met, the time we spent together passed by.

you were still within reach.

YOURS TRULY

i hope today will be a meaningful day.

i will always treat you well with the same heart.

i hope we can continue to be each other's strength.

i can’t guarantee that I will definitely come back, but i will try for you.

i will definitely come back someday, i promise.

we will make more memories, and become a relationship that doesn't need a reason.

when i think of you in the word 'us,' it gives me an amazing feeling.

you can look for me when you're sad.

[blueskiesrry]

2024 writing evaluation :)

thank you lizzzz for tagging me

1. Number of stories posted to AO3: 5!!!

2. Word count posted for the year: 199,325

3. Fandoms I wrote for: One Direction

4. Pairings: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson

5. Story with the most:

Kudos: everything of mine is yours

Bookmarks: everything of mine is yours

Comments: where we landed

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why): I'm most proud of everything of mine is yours because it really was just written purely based on what i wanted to write and was full of self indulgence. the writing style is one that i'm always trying to somehow replicate with my other works.

7. Work I’m least proud of (and why): to be honest, i'm not entirely sure. i wish i would've put more time into if we were butterflies but i wouldn't say i'm not proud of it. i love beige as well but there was hardly any thought put into it so maybe that's the one i'm least proud of. but not bc i don't love it haha

8. Share or describe a favorite review you received: any time i get a comment about a reread or someone going to read my other fics because they liked one of them is a different kind of special to me. to be specific though, i got a comment on where we landed from the person who submitted the prompt, and i still go back and read it when i'm struggling with writing. just know if you've ever left a comment or sent me a message about my fics, even if it's the smallest thing, i've held it close.

9. A time when writing was really, really hard: i found writing hard in late spring through the summer. i went really hard the first few months of the year (wrote four fics by may 😃) and i think it burnt me out a bit. there were some things i started and put to the side when i realized i was forcing myself to write them even though they weren't going how i wanted. this is the first year i've been serious and disciplined with my writing so i'm taking that as a learning experience.

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: there is a scene in you, in every color where louis and harry have their first disagreement of the fic that acts as a sort of indication that things are getting rocky, and it was surprising to me how difficult it was to get right. i ended up writing it a few times before i finally felt like in emulated what i was going for. the first draft was a large screaming match which ultimately didn't feel right for the characters.

11. A favorite excerpt of your writing: oh boy, i'm just going to post the first one i can think of lolol. i have nothing to say about it. this is from if we were butterflies

There’s many times in an artist’s life when they must decide whether to savor the moment with their eyes or in their art. To watch a sunset sky turn from purple to pink or to dip a brush in watercolor paint. To snap the picture of a lover lying in the moonlight or to lie with them across cool sheets. To put the pencil down when Harry parts his lips, Louis’ name on his tongue, or to capture his expression forever. “Lou,” Harry says in a voice he’s never heard before, hands shaking in his lap. Louis’ gaze snaps to his, and he must decide—to keep this to himself or to never go another day without the reminder of exactly how Harry is looking at him. And any other time it would feel easy. If it was anyone else, there might be the promise of another moment. But now? With Harry, here, like this, and so, so beautiful?

12. How did you grow as a writer this year: as i said above, this is the first year i've been intentional with my writing, so i think i grew in a lot of ways. most notably, i learned how to outline in a way that works for me which has been HUGE in actually finishing projects. i also learned that writing scenes in order is a lot easier for me and makes it more likely that i'll finish something.

13. How do you hope to grow next year: i'd like to get better at editing. i kind of despise editing after the first read through which leads to sloppiness. i'd like to do better at being intentional with editing and keeping an eye out for specific things.

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): this is also the first year that i've really had writer friends who i can talk about writing with so everyone that i've done this with has been a huge influence. specificallyyyyyy though, @harruandlou ofc. i've learned a lot from her about the technical side of writing from plotting to editing and everything in between. and obvs she's been incredible in putting up with my whining and scattered ideas during beta reading 🙂‍↕️

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: always. the first one i can think of is the place in chicago that harry goes in eomiy are places i also went for a conference during undergrad. i'm always pulling things from real life though, i couldn't possibly tell you all of them.

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: know your characters before anything else. while plot is important, people will come for the plot but stay for the characters so make sure you know exactly who they are, where they came from, and where they're going. i promise you it will make all the difference in how real your writing feels.

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: i recently finished writing my longest (!!!!!) fic yet (over 100k!!!!) that will come out soon into the new year. i'm looking forward to finishing up editing and sharing it with everyone :) i also do have some things planned that i can't wait to get started on!

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read.

ik you may have already been tagged but @petitommo @wishingforloushair @28goldens @insightfulinsomniac @louieshalo

[codiecoda]

Forgotten Anniversary - Lex Luthor/Slade Wilson Fanfic

Slade realizes that Alex forgot their anniversary

[Drabble Prompt: I can’t believe you didn’t remember]

There was certainly something that could be said about the workaholic nature that Alex held but when it came down to it he always prioritized Slade over his work. It was something that Slade was appreciative of but had a hard time being able to do the same. It amazed him how Alex managed to keep up with the insane amount of meetings he had to attend alongside making time for romantic evenings together. There were times that Slade ended up missing anniversaries and special dates because he couldn't remember that plans had been made. It was something that Alex never seemed to do and there was a part of him that thought he never would or at least that was until today.

It had been an insane last couple of weeks for Lexcorp as the company had boomed in popularity, leaving Alex running around to press conference after press conference. It wasn't something that Slade paid much mind to, or at least not until the evening of the nineteenth arrived. He had been waiting for Alex to come home so they could celebrate their anniversary, and though there was a part of Slade who knew the man would top whatever present he got him, he still couldn't wait to see the look on his face. The last thing he ever anticipated was for Alex to stumble in a half hour late with a disheveled appearance. It was clear that he had an absolutely horrible day, and the already miserable expression he carried seemed to worsen when he saw the flowers, the home-cooked meal, and the present his partner had got for him.

“Shit.. It's the nineteenth.” Alex muttered to himself as he threw his belongings on the ground, seeming far more stressed than he was before at the realization. “I promise I'm going to make this up to you. It has been a busy week, and I didn't even realize what month it was until the company received the paperwork from the press conference and—”

“You're not a machine.” Slade interrupted with this deep sense of love, unable to hide his smile as he pulled the other man into his arms. “You're not a machine. I think we both know how many important dates I've forgotten. You deserve to make a mistake every once in a while.”

“I'm going to make this up to you.” Alex promised as he allowed himself to be held, opening the present with care. “Is this bondage equipment—”

“I was starting to think I was dating a robot with how perfect you are about everything. It makes me feel better about myself, honestly.” Slade interrupted instead of addressing the question, unable to hide his own amusement in regard to the situation. “The bondage equipment is supposed to symbolize the love and trust we have for each other— Come on.. I love you.”

There would be another occasion in which Alex would forget an important date, but never again would it be in regard to his partner. There were some things more important than work and money, and Slade was one of those things, if not the only thing. He loved him more than anything.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/63953017

[dangerouscommiesubversive]

Commie is Occasionally Promptable! Here's How!

Prompts are currently: CLOSED

Hello, yes, I'm Commie, short for DangerousCommieSubversive on here and AO3, and if I'm not writing constantly then I begin to wither away. This pinned post exists to provide 1. a standing announcement of whether or not I am currently taking fic prompts and 2. some information on how to send me one.

How prompting works: I generally use prompt lists/memes, which I find provide a helpful degree of structure to the process. If prompts are open, the current list will be linked at the top of this post. To request a fic, check the current list, pick something you like, and send me an ask with your chosen prompts and the character(s) you'd like to see--you may prompt for whatever characters or ships within the listed fandoms, no need to restrict it to things I've already eritten. You may send two prompts total for any given period. Anonymous prompts are fine, I try to keep the anon option available. And that's it! That's the whole process. Although there is an important caveat: I do not promise to fill every prompt I receive. I've tried to do that in the past and risked exhaustion and creative burnout as a result; I've only got so much energy.

Fandoms I will write for: I've written a lot of fic for a lot of properties, but my interest and focus goes in waves, like the tides of a planet with an extremely irregular system of three moons which are all fighting with each other. Currently the fandoms I write for, or am theoretically interested in writing for, fall into three broad categories: tokusatsu, danmei, and dramas.

(Crossover prompts are totally fine, by the way. I love crossovers. I love to mix, and also to match.)

Hit the read-more for an actual categorized list of Things You Can Prompt For! ^_^

Tokusatsu: I already have a post about this, and it's pretty long, and I'm just going to keep maintaining that instead of reposting everything here. Suffice it to say if it's Kamen Rider, Super Sentai, Ultraman, or Garo, then I am very likely your girl. (I've also watched shows that aren't in any of those franchises, but they're the bulk of it.) Do note, though, that I won't write for a show until I've seen at least half of it.

Danmei: My current grand passion! I mostly read danmei with wuxia/xianxia settings, because I love martial arts and fantasy stories, but eventually I'll branch out. However, I will not write for a novel that I haven't finished reading, because I prefer to know the entire story before digging tooth and nail into writing more for it. Currently I can/will write for:

Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation/Módào Zǔshī, Mò Xiāng Tóng Xiù

The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System/Rén Zhā Fǎnpài Zìjiù Xìtǒng, Mò Xiāng Tóng Xiù

Heaven Official's Blessing/Tiān Guān Cì Fú, Mò Xiāng Tóng Xiù

Thousand Autumns/Qian Qiu, Meng Xi Shi

Currently I'm reading Peerless and Faraway Wanderers, and I have a TBR list of probably unhealthy length; if you're curious whether I'm planning on reading anything particular, the answer is probably yes, but feel free to ask me anyway. Hell, maybe I haven't heard of it yet, I love getting book recs.

Lord Seventh/Qi Ye, priest

Faraway Wanderers/Tiān Yá Kè, priest

The Disabled Tyrant's Beloved Pet Fish/Canji Baojun de Zhangxin Yu Chong, Xue Shan Fei Hu

Dramas: Some of these are based on novels which I've also read, or am reading! But obviously they have their continuity differences.

The Untamed

Word of Honor

Love Between Fairy and Devil

Til the End of the Moon

Mysterious Lotus Casebook

Meet You at the Blossom

Currently these are all Chinese-language dramas, although this is likely to change; my to-watch list is almost as scary as my TBR pile, and I like to watch shows in a variety of languages to keep my brain awake. (In fact my partner and I watch a lot of stuff together and have a rule that we can't watch two shows in the same language in a row.)

(Also this is making me think that I ought to rewatch Dorokei, there's some really good mess to dig my teeth into there.)

Ok! That's everything! Thanks for reading I love you send prompts!

[radarsteddybear]

Bad Things Happen Bingo Prompt Update

Prompt #1 has been edited! I just have to give it one last read-through when I can look at it with a little bit of distance to make sure I haven't missed anything, then I can post it...as soon as I come up with a title 🥴

Prompt #2 has not been touched beyond than the occasional poke or prod since before I started writing the Hogan's Heroes Christmas Carol fic in November. I've got to really sit down, reread it, and figure out how to pick up where I left off. Luckily, I don't have very much left to go...but what I have left is kind of the hard part, so. no idea what the timeline is gonna be on this one.

Those two are the only prompts I've received from other people, but I had an idea for a third one a couple of weeks ago and jotted down almost 150 words of it...and then the other day at work I had a completely different idea for the same prompt, so yesterday I wrote 280 words of that. I'll probably go with the second version so I'm not repeating the same characters in somewhat-similar situations over and over again, but I hope I can figure out how to fit the first one in somewhere else somehow. I like it.

I am still taking BTHB prompts, by the way. It might take me some time to write them, what with work and life (and other projects) taking up so much of my time, but I promise, I'll get to them.

[raycatzdraws]

HI HI HI HI HI My initial request prompt was for silly interactions between loz characters and animals. Some requests I've received have gotten off track LMAO. Thank you for sharing your characters and ideas with me! I have so many things I want to draw and a bunch of animal requests still so Imma get to those first. I cannot promise I'll respond to everything or respond in a timely manner 'xD. It's been half a year and I'm still working on those auuuhg They're really fun, though!

Also as a general heads up to everybody- please don't send me links (as in urls lol) without explanation. I don't know if the one I got was from a bot or a person, but it's an immediate block.

To botw/totk headcanon anon, I'm going to hold onto your ask, but also answer it here:

"Headcanon suggestion; between Wild and Tears, Link has gained weight after slaying the Calamity. Zelda comforts him as his body shows that he’s letting himself rest after the scars he carried, the battles he fought, the people he saved."

This is a really wonderful headcanon! I love reading it and seeing it in comics and art. I swear I saw something like this just the other day where Link and Zelda were visiting hotsprings? If someone's also seen it and wants to link to it in the comments that'd be awesome :D This is a headcanon I see in @/gaylactic-fire's and @/the-phantom-peach's art! It's also something @/linked-maze is exploring with their Warriors and I recommend checking out their comic it's really great!

If this is a request for art I have to apologize that it's not something I want to draw at the moment. I had (have?) anorexia and the thought of dwelling too long while drawing with a character that feels,, aah,, it's that Zelda is comforting him, implying that he feels guilty or uncomfortable about his body? It's a feeling that's important to explore through art and writing and I like to see it. It's a comfort to know that I am not alone. But to dwell in that discomfort myself around one's own body, or eating, makes me feel icky, so it's not something I'm going to draw, at least not right now, sorry TvT I've been there myself and it's too easy to fall back into that feeling and remember what it was like when my anorexia was bad so for my own wellbeing I'm not going to.

I do like the headcanon of Link who's gained weight after his adventures and him enjoying his body!

I'm holding on to your ask as a reminder to draw.

(edit: I found the hotspring art I was talking about! It's the same ask, too. Thanks for including me.)

[sharpzulfiqar]

Three Days

Here is a short prompt that is based on a prompt created by @dumplingsjinson. The prompt is “I deserve better than whatever you’re giving me.” from their list of communication breakdown prompts. Please credit me if you wish to repost this. If there is any spelling or grammatical errors, please ignore.

“I deserve better than whatever you’re giving me.” That's what I wish I could say to him. I know that what I receive shouldn't be enough for me. I'm aware that I deserve someone who is capable of blowing my standards out of the water. I know that I deserve everything. And yet, I receive nothing and somehow I find it enough for me.

The last time I spoke with him was three days ago. I hugged his body as his legs prepared themselves to pass the airport gate. I didn't want to let go of his cold skin. I pretended to ignore his stare towards the gate sign and his body's position towards the entrance. And yet, I let him go because he was ready to leave. I watched as his silhouette dressed in a tuxedo and his black carry on disappear with the other bodies. I stayed in the spot he abandoned me even after he was gone. There was no longing stare back at me. And yet, that didn't break my heart. He had somewhere to go, a place where I couldn't be there. I was preventing him from being timely. He should be early to his destination. I shouldn't be the cause of his lateness.

There was one promise he made to me. As I leaned on his naked body in bed the night before he left, he told me that he would message me every day. He warned me that I should expect a barrage of messages every hour. He apologized for any future delays in his texts because his work is the only thing that comes before me. I am his earth, but his job is the sun. The promise left his mouth after he finished me, so he had to be telling the truth. If he could be good in bed, than he has to be good in real life.

Before I left the airport, I texted him if he arrived to the gate safely. As soon as I got home, I texted him if he got to the plan. Before the night ended, I texted him if he landed safely. He never responded to my good mornings or goodnights. He never responded to my calls.

I have found meaning in his absence. I've deep cleaned our house. My fridge is now filled with the freshest ingredients. I've watered the plants, and fed our dog, Rocky. I've organized the clothes in both of our closets. I threw away the pink panties that were unfamiliar to me. I guess he's really busy at work.

[slowdesire]

you're like if the movie little forest was a person to me, your blog and your twitter are all very comfortable little corners of the internet and if i could turn a social media account into a house they'd be like little cottages nestled deep into the forest <3

stopppp omg i love that movie! though i've only seen it once and it's been a while, so this is planting the seed in my head to rewatch it this week. this is one of the highest compliments i have ever received, so thank you for the beautiful comparison 🥹

i have more to say but it got longwinded so i just put it under 'keep reading' it's not too important! do not feel obligated to read further! im practically just talking to myself. if you stop reading here then again, thank you for this! i'll cherish it in my heart forever <3

i find it funny you bring up my twitter too because idk where you know me from but i never feel at peace on twitter. like, it actually makes me enraged more often than not and prompts me to complain more than i normally would. why do i keep it? who knows. i have a handful of friends there i particularly like, and we coexist best in that space, so i stubbornly refuse to let go of it. but if you know me from there as well then i am glad you view my account/online spaces in a much better light than i do. and i commend you for making an effort to send asks here since it's a whole different platform.

not to be THAT person but i had to process this message for a bit after my work shift ended bc it made me #think. a lot. like, this is not at all how i view myself or the spaces i create. i mulled over this idea during my walk earlier, and i remembered the movie i recently watched (past lives). it forced me to reflect on the fact that to some people, i am terrible and flaky and chaotic and someone who always breaks their promises and leaves. while to other people i am a lifelong friend, someone who seems calm and put together, a constant who is strong enough to stay, and every other good quality i rarely acknowledge within myself.

it's a strange thing to grapple with, the multiplicity of selves that all coexist at once through perceptions of others. to weigh those in conjunction with how i view myself is an even more monumental point to contend with. so yeah, a bit of an existential spiral because well, you view me this way, and i can barely wrap my head around it. but at the same time i don't not believe it. if anything, i deeply appreciate your view of things. sincerely, thank you for giving me so much to chew on during my walk outside today

also i know this is not THAT deep but that's just how it is with me so oh well!

[andromeda3116]

ohhh man, would you be down for han/leia "we hate each other but we were invited to a mutual friend’s party and were warned to be civil so you complimented my costume and fuck you, i haven’t changed yet"?

ohohohohohohoho bless you, anon. i didn’t realize that this screamed han and leia until you sent me this and wow does it scream han and leia or what

.

.

“You know, you go on and on about how much you hate Han,” Bodhi mused, trying with little success to untangle some gauzy spider-web decoration that had apparently been sitting in a box in Jyn’s closet all year, “but you really seem to enjoy arguing with him. Every time we hang out, you go straight to him and start a fight.”

“I do not,” Leia snapped, scowling and crossing her arms. (She did. She knew that she did. But something about that arrogant twit’s face set her teeth on edge, and in her defense, he gave nearly as good as he got.) “He’s an obnoxious ass. I don’t know why Luke insists on bringing him around.”

“Han isn’t a bad guy,” Bodhi replied, sighing and giving up on the spider-web. “He tries too hard sometimes, but he’s always looking out for us. You should give him a chance.”

“I have tried to give him chances,” she muttered, and Bodhi rolled his eyes, making a noise of frustration in the back of his throat.

“Look, it’s my apartment and I say that if you and Han get into another screaming match in my living room, I’m kicking both of you out for good,” he said. “Be civil for one night, will you?”

Leia growled, but then threw up her hands in exasperation. “Fine. Fine! I’ll be nice.”

“Thank you,” Bodhi said, and smiled, and almost made it worth it.

.

Han was apparently going for “fashionably late”, which was something Leia would have noticed if she had been paying attention to whether or not he had arrived yet, which she definitely had not been doing, thank you, Luke. He showed up, looking disheveled, around eight, and Leia decided to start off on the right foot.

“I like your costume,” she said gamely, gesturing with her wineglass. He blinked at her.

“Excuse me?”

“Space hobo, right?” she suggested, and snapped her fingers, trying to remember the name of the show. “From that cartoon? With the robot and the aliens?”

“Space hobo?” he repeated, and a small, creeping feeling began to snake up Leia’s spine.

“You know,” she went on, desperate not to show the deep, suspicious horror rising in her gut, “the one with the guy who falls into cryo-sleep for a thousand years? It’s got the cyclops-girl with purple hair. Luke has all the seasons.”

Han started to speak, stopped, and shook his head slowly before stalking past, leaving her standing at the door, wide-eyed and cringing. “Un-fucking-believable,” he muttered, and she wondered if it was possible to will herself through the floor and into the Earth’s core. “You can’t even let up for one night?”

She finished her wine immediately, then got another glass and began working her way through it much faster than she really ought to, which caught Jyn’s attention.

“What happened?” she asked, and Leia looked at her.

“I was trying to be nice,” she snapped, running a hand over her face. She was vaguely aware that she was probably more embarrassed than she really should have been, considering that only Han had heard her total fuck-up, and even though he would be sure to tell other people, she could probably come up with a way to turn it around, or at least laugh it off. But she was mortified. “I complimented Han’s costume.”

“Oh, I thought he’d left it with Bodhi,” Jyn said, and Leia winced into her wine. “He had to work late, or something. It’s clever, a little obscure, but clever.”

“Is it?” she said faintly. Jyn stared at her, as she took another deep drink. “I thought he was already dressed,” she admitted, closing her eyes. “There’s a character in a show, it’s a space hobo, he wears that same kind of scarf and coat, I thought – “

“Oh,” Jyn replied, looking like she was trying not to laugh and only barely succeeding.

“I was trying to be nice,” Leia repeated, voice unnaturally high.

.

“Look, I’m sorry,” she slurred, trying to drink enough water to magically undo the wine from earlier. Han – his costume actually was clever, once she’d figured out where it was from, he was “the Ghost of a Texas Ladies’ Man” from some obscure nineties song, in a white leisure suit and white face-paint and a fake mustache – scowled at her. “I really am. I didn’t mean anything by it. Your costume really is good. I mean your real one. But you could have come as a space hobo and it still would have been good.”

“How much have you had?” he asked, actually sounding a bit concerned, and she pressed the bottle of water to her forehead.

“Not enough to forget completely humiliating myself at the start of the party,” she replied fervently, and almost missed the way he seemed to war with himself before settling on a sympathetic expression.

“Don’t… worry about it, Princess,” he said, patting her on the shoulder and pulling another bottle of water out of the cooler. “I’ve been needing a new coat for a couple of years,” he added in a mutter, and she groaned. Goddammit. He wasn’t supposed to be nice. Why was he better at being civil than she was?

“I’m sorry,” she repeated, sighing. “Bodhi asked me to be nice but apparently I’m awful at nice.”

“You’re being nice right now,” he offered, shrugging.

She groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Great,” she said irritably. “The trick is to humiliate myself and get toasted.”

“Why do insist on taking everything I say the wrong way?” he grumbled, crossing his arms.

“I do not insist – “

“Yes, you do! You know what I think?” he asked, then answered himself, leaning in closer. “I think you have feelings for me and you don’t know what to do with them.”

“Excuse me?” she snarled, stepping forward, and opened her mouth to launch into a tirade about how wrong he was, God, what an asshole, how dare he – but then someone in yellow robes literally swept in-between them.

“Ah, Princess Leia!” Chirrut said brightly, taking her by the arm. “I would be honored if you would show me to the kitchen, your majesty.”

She scowled. It was transparent, since Chirrut had been here several times before and knew his way around, but at the same time, she had rarely needed an exit strategy so badly before.

With what dignity she could muster, she gathered her wide skirts in her free hand and stalked away with the blind man.

“He thinks I have feelings for him,” she muttered, half to herself and half to Chirrut, who released her arm in the kitchen and began opening a new bag of chips. How he knew which ones he was grabbing before he opened them – or, indeed, if he cared – was beyond her.

“Is he wrong?” Chirrut asked, and Leia spluttered indignantly. “I am going to translate that as no.”

“I do not have feelings for Han,” she hissed.

“Hmm,” he mused, then sized upon an opportunity as Jyn walked in for another drink. “Ah, an object lesson,” he said, and both Leia and Jyn looked at him in confusion. “Jyn, do you have feelings for Han?”

Jyn made a face, and replied, “No?” sounding a bit lost. “He’s all right, but not my type. Why?”

Leia bit her tongue. Object lesson, right.

“Simply proving a point to her majesty,” he answered, smiling.

“Oh,” Jyn said, and it actually sounded like that had made sense to her. “You’re still in denial?” she asked Leia, who clenched her jaw tightly.

“In denial of what, Erso?” she snapped, and Jyn snorted.

“Nevermind,” she said, rolling her eyes and stalking back out of the kitchen with the last of a bottle of wine.

“I’m over this party,” Leia muttered darkly, readjusting her tiara with some force, as Chirrut shook his head.

“I cannot say if the two of you would be well-matched,” he said, as though it was a conversation she was at all willing to have. “But I do think you should try. Where there are sparks, there is usually flame. Han is a good man, and he cares for you very deeply.”

“Han hates me,” she countered, incredulous, but Chirrut only raised an eyebrow.

“He goes to a lot of trouble to be around you, if he hates you.”

And with that, the kitchen had officially become More Awkward than the living room, so she made a noncommittal noise and fled the scene before anyone else could show up and start talking romance to her.

She stalked up to her brother, wearing a rather ridiculous costume, which, judging by his uncomfortable shifting in the tights, he seemed to be regretting. “Why does everyone think I have a thing for Han?” she snapped, and Luke gave her a look as though wondering if she was joking.

“You’re obsessed with him,” he replied slowly. “Every time we hang out, you go straight to him and pick a fight.”

“I do not,” she cried, and Luke raised an eyebrow, sipping his drink out of the skull-shaped mug he’d brought with him as a prop.

“Methinks the lady doth protest too much,” he said lightly, and, at her outraged glare, shrugged. “What? I’m Hamlet, I’m quoting Hamlet.”

She clenched her jaw and crossed her arms tightly. “I’m going home,” she snarled. Luckily, most of them lived in the same complex, so she only had to walk up a couple of flights of stairs to get there – which was good, considering she was still very not-sober, in spite of all the water.

“All right,” he replied, giving her a one-armed hug. “Test me when you get home.”

“Sure,” she muttered, a little sullen, and started for the door.

“Don’t lose a shoe on the stairs,” Luke called after her, and she flipped him off without turning back.

“You’re leaving?” Han asked, catching her as she snatched up her purse near the door.

“Yes,” she growled, and he made a face.

“Let me walk you.”

She almost threw her purse down in frustration. “It’s two flights of stairs and a hallway,” she growled. “I can walk myself.”

Her argument was somewhat diminished by her stumbling as the door opened much easier than she’d expected. She didn’t fall, and almost managed to draw herself up like she’d meant to do that, but it was a nasty blow to the dignity all the same.

“Are you sure?” Han deadpanned, and she rolled her eyes.

“Good night, Han,” she snapped and he threw up his hands.

“Fine, whatever,” he muttered. “Text somebody when you get home.”

She waved him off and stalked back to her apartment.

Feelings for Han, she thought darkly, wrenching open the door. Yeah, right.

.

The hangover was finally starting to pass when someone knocked on her door. She answered it wearily, clutching her coffee like a lifeline, to see Han standing there, with –

“You left your shoes.”

In his hand was the pair of sparkly and very uncomfortable shoes that she’d taken off shortly after arriving to the party, then promptly forgotten all about. Jyn had let her borrow a pair of her flats after taking one look at the spike heel.

With a dark look and a tight, “Thank you,” she took them back from him and closed the door.

“You’re welcome,” he said loudly, from the hall, and she glared at the heels.

Goddammit.

[professorjaskier]

Hello darling wife, I come to your inbox to beg of you some words. Geralt notices a scar on Jaskier’s face, close to his mouth, and can’t stop staring. Please and thank you🥺❤️

Hello wife!! I've finally gotten to your ask. I would also like to thank all my followers because I've hit my 100 follower mark! Thank you for reading my content. Send me an ask if you have any prompt requests :)

Title: We All Got Scars

Pairing: Geraskier

Tags: Some Self-Esteem Issues and they are Hungover

Word Count: 2K

Geralt groaned as his eyes opened and he took stock of his surroundings. He was in his room. Normally that wouldn’t be surprising, but he couldn’t recall how he had gotten there.

Last night was a technicolor blur of tequila and Jaskier. Geralt took a moment to try and recall what time he’d gotten home, but it was all a blank. Damn Yennefer and her parties. He was getting too old for this shit.

Another twitch of his body brought forth a wave of nausea and pain. Coffee. He needed coffee.

Drawn out from under the covers by the promise of caffeine and Advil, he blearily stumbled towards the kitchen, solely relying on his muscle memory to make it there. As he turned the corner, Geralt was surprised to find Jaskier half-sprawled on their kitchen counter, watching the coffee machine with single-minded focus. Jaskier usually didn’t make it home after Yennefer’s parties, instead taking the opportunity to find a partner for the evening. To see him home this early was unheard of.

“Mornin’,” Jaskier mumbled into his arms as he continued to stare at the coffee maker.

“Hmmm.”

Jaskier chuckled, the motion causing the younger man to wince and look up at him. “Ditto, Geralt. When did we make it home?”

“Fuck if I know.”

At that moment the Jaskier perked up and grabbed the coffee pot off the hot plate with a triumphant expression. He looked obviously hungover with the dark circles under his eyes, greasy hair, and the scar on the corner of his lip—wait, what?

Geralt blinked and stared, transfixed by the small mark located near the top curve of his roommate’s lip. It was small, barely noticeable unless someone were looking intently at Jaskier, but that was the thing. Geralt always looked at Jaskier. He’d been entranced by the younger man since the moment they had met, and Geralt would have noticed a scar on Jaskier’s face before now. It must be new.

Geralt and Jaskier had parted ways during their summer holidays. Geralt had taken the chance to work at the family business to recoup his finances while Jaskier had been hired at a summer stock theatre far away from their university. They’d texted one another often, and Geralt received the occasional Facetime, but those interactions couldn’t compare with living together in an apartment. Something must have happened during those few months.

“Earth to Geralt!”

His attention was pulled back to Jaskier as the younger man snapped his fingers to catch his notice. Geralt winced, the small, repetitive noises feeling like a person using his head as a drum. He was never drinking again.

With a snarl he finally acknowledged Jaskier. “What?”

“I’ve asked you how many eggs you want five times. I know it’s usually three after a night out, but I wanted to check and what does my generosity get me?! An absolute disregard of my existence.”

Geralt watched as Jaskier prattled in an increasingly ridiculous manner while he continued to make scrambled eggs. He was too hungover to understand what the other man was saying—truthfully, he had trouble keeping up with Jaskier normally, but his concentration was being further broken by that little blemish on his lip. How hadn’t he noticed it before?

His legs moved of their own volition and three strides later he was standing beside him. Jaskier had yet to notice his shift in position, still going on his rant, but that could wait. This was far more important.

Using all the tenderness he possessed, he gently placed his hand on Jaskier’s jaw and slowly brought Jaskier’s gaze to meet his own. Jaskier finally paused midword, his mouth hanging open for a moment before he tilted his head.

“Geralt, what—?”

“What happened?”

Before Jaskier could ask for clarification, Geralt swiped his thumb along the scar, savoring the warmth of Jaskier’s skin. It was so soft, even the small ridge where the old wound did not blend in with its surroundings. He’d known Jaskier’s skin was soft. They’d brushed against each other several times while they’d lived together. It was bound to happen when living in an apartment the size of a shoe box. Between that and Jaskier’s tactile nature, Geralt had felt the smoothness of his roommate’s skin before, but not like this.

Suddenly realizing that his touch has lingered too long, Geralt tears away his hand, noting that his hand felt colder than ever after taking it away from Jaskier’s warmth. He shouldn’t have given into the temptation of touching Jaskier like that. Now he would know what he was missing.

Tearing his gaze away from the scar, Geralt realized that Jaskier was uncharacteristically silent. The younger man hadn’t said a word, his own hand trailing towards his lips and ghosting over the scar. Geralt watched in confusion as Jaskier’s eyebrows drew together before his lips formed a perfect O-shape.

“Oh. That.”

Jaskier blushed and turned back towards the eggs, throwing himself into the job of keeping them unburned and edible. Geralt watched him intently, knowing that Jaskier would eventually say something more. The man always had something to say.

Geralt was right. Jaskier soon sighed, something Geralt knew signalled that Jaskier was preparing to speak, but something wasn’t right. Jaskier’s shoulders were hunching inwards, as though he were trying to make himself look smaller, and his usual sunny smile was dimmed by something more than the hangover plaguing them both. All of this pointed to one truth: something was wrong.

“Just a small scar from childhood. Got it from falling off the jungle gym at school.”

Geralt furrowed his brows, trying to move Jaskier’s face towards him once more, but this time he found resistance. With a sigh of defeat, Geralt replied, “I’ve never seen it before.”

Jaskier nodded, his eyes staring intently at the eggs. “I usually cover it up. Forgot to do it this morning. Must be more hungover than I thought.” Jaskier smiled, but it appeared more like a grimace.

This was wrong. Jaskier was never embarrassed about his body. He walked around the apartment in little to no clothing and the walls were thin enough that Geralt knew he had his fair share of partners, but—

Well, now that he thought about it, Jaskier spent a lot of time in front of the mirror every morning. He would primp and preen, ensuring that not a single-hair could be found out of place. Sometimes Jaskier would say no to pizza with their friends, saying that he should really order a salad instead and god forbid he had a pimple! He’d once cancelled a date because he had a zit on his forehead.

Maybe it wasn’t such a surprise that Jaskier would be this worked up over a tiny facial scar.

He was drawn out of his thoughts by Jaskier’s sharp snort of laughter. “I know it’s not a pretty sight, trust me. Doesn’t suit me at all, not like your scars. If only!”

Geralt watched as Jaskier used the spatula to move the eggs around the pan. He was still trying to understand what Jaskier was talking about when his roommate kept going.

“I’ve been covering it up since I got it. My mother hated it, always said it was a shame that I’d ruined my pretty face so young and it is a shame because I need my face for my career. I can’t believe I’ve gotten so sloppy, but don’t worry about it, you won’t be seeing it again—”

Those last words drew Geralt out of his shock and thrust him back into action. “That’s bullshit.”

“What?” Geralt flinched at Jaskier’s hurt tone and the confusion shining in his eyes, and it takes a moment for him to understand why.

“No, no, not the part about me not seeing it again. Everything else. You’re beautiful, Jaskier.” Geralt trailed off as he spoke those three words, his friend’s name coming out as a whisper.

There was a moment of silence as both men stared at one another, each waiting for the other to make their move. When Jaskier stayed uncharacteristically silent, Geralt continued.

“You are. Anyone would tell you that, and a small little scar won’t change that. I’m just glad it isn’t new.” Geralt looked up into Jaskier’s eyes to find confusion, so he continued. “I thought you’d gotten it over the summer while I wasn’t there to protect you.” He gently brushed his thumb over the small blemish, his skin burning once more where he touched Jaskier. He was like a moth drawn to a flame, and he knew he’d never forget the feel of Jaskier’s skin against his own.

Jaskier smiled, his blue eyes filling with tears as he placed his hand over Geralt’s, clasping them together against his cheek. “Oh you sweet, sweet man. I’m sorry I scared you.”

“Your response scared me more, Jask,” he replied, his eyes continuing to dart down towards his lips. “You are beautiful. You don’t need to cover this up.”

“But—”

“No,” Geralt said, cutting off whatever ridiculous comeback danced on his silver-tongue. “You’re handsome and smart and—fuck, I’m sorry, I don’t have the words. I’m not a poet like you are, but you shouldn’t feel ashamed of such a tiny thing when you’re so much more.”

There was silence as Jaskier took in the words he’d said. He hoped they’d come out right. Although he was no poet, he would always try for Jaskier.

“But—”

Geralt rolled his eyes and leaned in closer, pressing his lips against Jaskier’s. He felt the small gasp of shock against his lips, but it was soon replaced by an eager tongue and a wicked smile. It was everything he’d dreamed it would be, except—

Geralt pulled away, the reality of what he’d done sinking in. He’d kissed Jaskier. He’d kissed him and Jaskier had kissed him back, but what if it had been a mistake? What if Jaskier hadn’t wanted to kiss him? Shit, he’d held back his feelings for years and this was what destroyed everything? He’d have to start apartment hunting and apologize—well he could do that last bit now.

“Sorry,” Geralt murmured as he tried to pull away, but he found himself tugged back with a familiar pair of lips pressing hungrily against his lips.

This kiss was quick compared to the first and Jaskier soon broke away, breathing heavily as he looked into Geralt’s eyes. “Don’t apologize. I’ve been waiting for that for years.”

Geralt blinked, momentarily unable to deal with the fact that Jaskier had loved him back for years. They could’ve been doing that for years, but Geralt had more pressing matters to deal with.

He traced the length of Jaskier’s cheekbones, his nose, his lips, ending with the small scar that had started this conversation.

“They’re not ugly. You’re pretty.”

Geralt watched as Jaskier’s eyes softened. A smile worked its way onto his face as the singer replied, “You really think so?”

“I know so.”

Jaskier opened his mouth, but before he could speak Geralt saw him sniff the air, confusion flooding his face.

“Shit, the eggs!” Without another word, Jaskier bolted towards the stove and pulled the smoking pan off the hob.

Geralt watched as Jaskier fanned away smoke and frantically opened windows, letting those kisses play through his mind. They were perfect. Everything he’d dreamed of, notwithstanding the burned eggs. It wouldn’t have been a moment with Jaskier without one of his idiosyncrasies making things interesting.

For now, he had to make sure the fire alarms wouldn’t go off and make their hangovers worse. They’d have time to talk later.

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[obriengf]

Recently, I hit 500 followers and I still can't stop expressing my gratitude. I wanted to do something to celebrate, and it may not be big, but I hope that people will join in and contribute! I've had this blog since August 2021 and have written close to 50 fics/blurbs, so this support and love really truly means a lot to me.

I've decided to post some prompts, which have been collected from different masterlists/sources (under the cut) and please feel welcome to send in ONE of the prompts alongside ONE Dylan character or the main man himself. How am I going to write these? Well... what I will be writing is a response to what your chosen prompt says. It's a little different to how I usually write these things, so I thought I'd give it a shot!

Please, do not spam my inbox with more than one request. I will temporarily close requests if I receive too many, and if you're sending in more than one, others won't be able to contribute. HAVE FUN and I hope my writing does your request justice!

Angst (sadness, anger, anxiety, fear, discomfort, death):

*ONE prompt & ONE character/dylan* CLOSED

“i know we’re not... friends or anything, but... i’m here for you, if you need someone to talk to.”

“you seem to be the only trustworthy one around here, so can i talk to you?”

“ you know, if you’re trying to make me feel guilty, you’ve succeeded.”

“i don’t want to bother you. seriously, it’s all just... it’s a lot.”

“i don’t know what’s wrong with me. i can’t stop crying.”

“you are, without a doubt, the most annoying person i’ve ever crossed paths with. and don’t even get me started on the sound of your voice.”

“ i didn't know where else to go. “

“ just... be honest with me, do you hate me? “

“ i could never hate you. not really. “

“ things would be so much easier if we were honest with each other. “

“ why can't you be honest with me? with yourself? “

” i miss you. i miss you so much it hurts. ”

” i don’t want you to miss me. it’s tearing me apart. ”

” your scars are nothing to be ashamed of. ”

“ i see every mark as something to be proud of, proof of all i survived. “

“  it’s okay—  you can touch it if you want.  doesn’t hurt anymore.  ”

“ please don’t touch it.  ”

“  you don’t have to tell me how you got it.  i just wanted to see.  ”

"i don’t understand, why are you doing this?”

“now, before i say anything, promise me you’ll stay calm.”

“i have a lot going for me, but humility is not one of them.”

“you’re the worst.”

“i don’t need you right now.”

“you're no longer useful to me.”

“ he’s just a friend? “

“ you’re so full of shit. “

“ come on, you’re in love with him!. “

“ my ex won’t leave me alone, okay, i’m in desperate need of a diversion. “

“ i can’t believe i trusted you. “

“ you broke your promise. why? “

“ did i break your heart? “

” i don’t love you anymore. ”

” maybe you should take a good, long look in the mirror… ”

” after today, there’s no me and you. ”

“ don’t freak out. “

“ are you okay? “

“ is that blood? “

“ holy shit… how long have you gone like this? “

“ are you okay with me touching you? “

“ oh my god… are you hurt? “

“ i’ve got a first aid kit in my car. let me go grab it. “

“ be prepared. this’ll sting like a motherfucker… “

“ i injured myself. it’s completely my fault. “

“we aren’t friends. friends don’t do this kinda thing.”

“ did… did i do this to you? ”

“ no… no, no! why did you follow me?! oh, god… just, just hold on, okay? hold on! ”

“ no… no, no, no, no, no. no! ”

“ i told you! i told you to stay back! ”

“ no, no… please… i’m sorry! ”

“ i know i’m probably the last person you want to see right now, i just… needed to know if you were okay. ”

“ i never thought i’d be so happy to see your stupid face again! ”

“ shh!! don’t speak, okay? we gotta be quiet if we wanna get out of here… ”

“ hey! hey, wake up! come on now, we didn’t come all this way, right? stay with me! i’m bringing you home! ”

“ here. you’re shaking; take my jacket. it’s time to bring you home. ”

“ i know, i know it hurts, just… look! we’re almost there, see ‘em? see the medics? just hang in there, we’re almost there! ”

“ i don’t want you to see me like this. “

“ you can’t sit here and watch me bleed out. “

“ you’ll fight, do you hear me? fight for me. “

“ you just need to hold on. just for a little longer. “

“ don’t move! the paramedics are on their way. “

“ i know it’s selfish, but it had to be me. i just couldn’t watch you die. “

“You don’t have to do this alone.”

“ why won’t you fight, goddammit!? “

“ don’t say goodbye. please, don’t… “

“ don’t you dare close your eyes! “

“ just tell me it was worth it… tell me our love was worth it… “

“ you were destined for the stars. “

“ don’t say goodbye. just… until we meet again. “

“ until death do us part right, right? “

“You didn’t deserve that… You deserve so much better.”

“I can’t take this anymore.”

“Please don’t cry.”

“Don’t shut me out.”

“Give me one single fucking reason why I shouldn’t leave.”

“You're joking, right? That asshole did NOT ask you out.”

“It's him or me.”

Fluff (happiness, love, comedy, devotion, intimacy, passion):

“ don't go. stay. “

“ you're my friend, but... sometimes i wish you were more than that. “

“ we're not just friends. you know that. “

“ it’s dark outside, and it’s raining. my arms are much safer. “

“ you know me better than anyone. you always have. “

“ you're pretty amazing. you know that, right? “

“ you're just... you're extraordinary. “

“ you're good to me, you know. really good. “

“ this baby, it's the best thing that could ever have happened to us. “

“ dance with me? “

“ may i have this dance? “

“ you're my whole world, you know. “

“ do you think we should move in together? you spend all your time here anyway. “

“ are you serious? i've had a crush on you for as long as i can remember. “

“ i know you're in love with me. “

“ you flat out just admitted that you have feelings for me. “

“ it’s not like i’ve fantasized about you or anything… “

“ man, fuck that guy. go show him what he’s missing. “

“ do you think that this, us… do you think it could ever… be something more? “

“ we’ve been best friends since middle school, nobody’s going to believe this. “

“ there’s only one bed here. “

“ would you pretend to be my date? just… for tonight? “

“ what i’m about to ask you might be a little… inappropriate. “

“ do you think we should practice? you know, just to be sure it looks believable? “

“ let me have a look… “

“ last night was nice.  ”

“  next time, maybe i’ll buy you dinner first.  ”

“  no don’t move, it’s too cold outside the covers.  ”

“  there’s no way i can hide these marks…  ”

“  you look cute all frazzled like this.  ”

“  i can’t find my shirt.  ”

“  babe, we slept in.  ”

“  i know you’re awake.  ”

“  you know, if you moved in we wouldn’t keep having to say goodbye like this.  ”

“  you talk in your sleep, ya know.  ”

“do you ever feel… like… you know… things? like… those warm… feelings?”

“oh my god, stop looking at me like that! i’m gonna end up kissing you.”

“who the fuck said that? you’re great.”

“i don’t think you’re weird. i think you’re cute.”

“i don’t think you’re weird. you’re a dumbass, maybe, but i like that about you.”

“obviously i like you! i’ve been trying to tell you for ages now!”

“i’ve been flirting with you for the last six months, thanks for noticing.”

“i wouldn’t die for you, but i think i’d kill for you. maybe. but then, that would mean going to jail… nah. i take it back. no offence.”

“they’re just flowers, don’t read into it.”

“can you please stop moving your mouth so i can kiss you?”

“you wanna kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid.”

“ nice flowers… are they for me? ”

“ i want you to kiss me. “

“ i would pretty much trust you with my life. “

“ if there’s anything you don’t want to do, you don’t have to. “

“ i like spending time with you. it’s nice. ”

“ don’t think for even a second that you have to prove something to me. i love you just the way you are. “

“hey! i gave you that key for emergencies only!”

“it's been two years and my grandma still thinks we're dating”

“  you have a good heart.  ”

“  do you like my new suit?  ”

“  could you hug me again? i think i need it.  ”

“  i like hearing your heart beating when i put my head on your chest.  ”

“  i like watching you work.  ”

“  just sit there.  i’m going to make you something to eat.  ”

“  why don’t you tell me what i can do to make your day better?  ”

“ so here’s uh, the key to my hotel room. you know, if you change your mind. “

“ you know, right now, i think i’m a little too tipsy to make a good decision. and unfortunately— so are you. “

“ i’ve seen you on the dance-floor. quite the moves you got there. “

“ so… do you come here often? “

“ you breathe life into my soul. “

“I have an extra ticket… Would you like to go with me?”

“I saw you looking at it last time we were in the store together, so I got it for you.”

“Last night your feet were really cold, so I found some of your socks and put them on you.”

“I want you to meet my family.”

“I never imagined that someone’s heartbeat could sound so amazing.”

Smut 18+ (sex, sexual language, sexual actions):

“ you belong to me, with me, under me. consensually, of course. “

“ look, we’re both young, and attractive, and we’re single, good at sex… i don’t see why we shouldn’t take advantage of that. “

“ you’ll see me in any man you touch, and when his fingers trace your body, you’ll close your eyes, wishing it was me… “

“ get on your knees and show me what you’re capable of. “

“ do you touch yourself at night, thinking of me? “

“ hate-sex is quite good for the soul. “

“ look at me, please… look at me when you make love to me. “

“ that wasn’t just sex. it was something more. “

“ i know i'm balls deep inside of you right now... but fuck, you have no idea how bad i want to propose. “

“ you are so good to me… so good. “

“ i need to make love to you tonight. “

“ can i come inside? “

“ when you said you were good at sex, i thought you were being cocky. “

“ are you sure you’re a virgin? because holy fuck, you know what you’re doing. “

“ you just lay back down, and i’ll take care of you. “

“ that wasn’t bad. that wasn’t bad at all. “

“ the best part about sex is cuddling afterwards. “

“ how far do you want to go tonight? “

“ you’re safe with me, you know that right? “

“ we’re not going too fast, right? you’ll tell me if we are? “

“i promise it doesn’t bite. “

“ i think we’ve waited long enough. “

“ i want you. all of you. tonight. “

“ you haven’t had sex in god knows how long, and you think i’m gonna shove that thing inside you first thing i do? “

“ look, i get that you’re scared. but loads of people have sex, okay? we’re practically designed to have sex. “

“ listen, tell me if you’re uncomfortable, or if it hurts, and we’ll stop right away, okay? “

“ what if i’m horrible at this? “

“ i need to process what the fuck just happened. “

“ actually, i think we have to go again. you know, just to be sure… “

[jimmys-zeppelin]

ghostin'

chapter twenty-nine

(table of contents)

march 29, 1977

Ellie tapped her fingers impatiently as the droning of the phone put her anxiety just over the edge. Two seconds later she was slamming the receiver back down and picking it up again; this time dialing a different number.

It was barely five seconds before the call was answered, "Hello?"

"Hey Andrew, it's Ellie."

"Well it's about damn fucking time you called! I thought you were dead, princess." He replied, the anger imminent in his voice.

"Sorry!" Ellie exclaimed, "it's been so hectic and—I haven't forgotten you, I promise! I really just haven't had any—"

"Yeah sure," Andrew said, exaggerating the 'e' to showcase his displeasure, "You've been gone two weeks and haven't even given so much as a peep!"

"I sent out a post card from Hamburg last week!" Ellie shot back, "Plus I got you some goodies too."

"Good, I deserve them." he huffed, prompting Ellie to laugh.

"How's it been taking care of my house?" she asked.

"I threw several parties. Drugs, cum, and alcohol all over the floor. I'm letting it marinate for when you get back."

"Oh, perfect. Thanks so much Andrew, I was due for a marination."

After a beat, the two broke out into fits of laughter, with Andrew cutting in, "The house is fine, I've been playing housewife every few days: dusting things off, watering your plants, lazing on your couch, eating your food....you know. How's it been with the blondie?"

"Roger? He's good I guess. He had to go back to England for a few days this week to figure out some stuff because he's got a tour right after the end of mine and—oh my god! Jesse tried to fucking make out with me!"

"I fucking knew it! I told you from the beginning he just wanted to drag you into bed. So what happened, did you fire him?"

"No, I scared him off because I don't wanna be stuck finding a guitarist on short notice, but holy fuck I wish I could've done something more."

"Holy shit...did you tell Roger?"

"Yeah. He seemed pretty ticked off, to be honest, but if Jess had pushed any more I would've been banging on Roger's door like a damsel in distress."

Andrew pulled the phone away from his mouth and yelled out in relief, "you two need to fuck as soon as possible."

While it was plausible, the idea of getting to that point with Roger scared her a ton. Of course Ellie had hooked up with a small handful of guys since breaking things off with Jimmy, but it still felt odd to be with other people. Like she didn't deserve it somehow.

"Yeah yeah yeah...I don't even know how he feels about me." she said, rolling her eyes.

"You're so fucking dumb, you know that?"

"Thanks Andrew, that's real sweet of you." Ellie chuckled dryly.

"I'm serious! This man took you home when you were blackout drunk on the Fourth of July, missed his flight to make sure you got home safe, is going on TOUR with you through Europe and PAYING for his own expenses. He's—I'm sure—totally romancing you with his, quote-unquote 'innocent friendly gestures'. Ellie you're dense!"

"Oh, come on, Drew! Those are all things you'd probably do for me."

"Not if I wasn't in love with you!" Andrew insisted. "Hotel rooms are expensive, Ellie!"

A knock on the door made Ellie jump where she sat on her hotel bed, "Listen, there's someone at the door, I have to call you back."

"You better! I'll be at your house until you do."

"That's right, leech off me. Okay, bye." she said, hanging up the phone and rushing towards the door when another set of knocks echoed throughout the hotel room.

Looking in the peep hole, she saw Carolyn outside. Opening the door, she greeted her, "Hey, what's up?"

"There's an interviewer downstairs for you. Just a pop magazine. Also here to take some photos if you don't mind. You look good, the pictures should come out well."

"Thanks." Ellie replied, "come in, I just have to pee first." she said, opening the door for her manager before entering the restroom.

"You were on the phone?"

"Yeah, I was just giving my friend Andrew a call. You know him. He's house-sitting for me while I'm gone."

"Oh, okay." she said. The tone of her voice hinted that the conversation was likely not her top priority and was focused on something else. "You talk to Roger yet?" she asked as Ellie flushed. Rinsing her hands, she quickly dried them on her pants as she entered the main room. Carolyn had been eyeing the corner of the notebook sheet with Roger's phone number scribbled onto it.

"No." Ellie gulped, using her damp hands to push down the flyaways on her hair, "Let's go."

Arriving into the multipurpose room where her interviewer sat patiently with a photographer beside her, Ellie smiled to them as they stood to shake her hand.

"How are you?" The woman asked, her German accent thick in the way she spoke.

"Good, good, thank you." Ellie replied, exchanging pleasantries with the photographer as well before taking a seat. "Do you want to take photos first or do the interview first?"

"Leon will take some photos as I conduct the interview and then he'll take some shots of you for the magazine."

"Sounds good. And your name?"

"Elsa." she introduced. Ellie nodded in response and sat back in her chair.

Elsa scribbled a few things down in her notebook before reaching into her purse and turning on her tape recorder. "Mind if I record?"

She shook her head, pulling her carton of cigarettes from her back pocket, "Mind if I smoke?" she mirrored in question, to which Elsa shook her head. The two chuckled before the interview started.

"How's Germany been for you, Ellie? Do you miss the US a lot?"

"It feels like I've been gone a month when it's only been about two weeks, so yeah, a little. It's been kinda surreal especially since I don't speak an ounce of German and everyone here seems to know the words to all my songs." She chuckled, taking a long and satisfying drag of her cigarette. Beside her, she could hear the shutter of Leon's camera. She wondered how an image of her smoking a cigarette would sell.

"You come from New York, yes?"

"That's right."

"So what's one thing you miss about home?"

"I'm gonna be honest, I thought there'd be more Pop Tarts available for purchase here." Ellie laughed, blowing away the smoke from the side of her lip.

"What are Pop Tarts?"

Ellie stammered, sitting up in her seat and trying to give Elsa a rough size guesstimate with her hands, "They're these, uh, pastries—hyper-processed, obviously—in the States. They have lots of filling and—it's not important," she chuckled, putting a hand over her eyes, "they're just some junk food I miss. But I also miss the California weather."

"Much warmer than over here in Germany, yeah?"

"Definitely," Ellie laughed, sucking on her cigarette.

Elsa scribbled down a bit in her notepad as Leon snapped away with his camera. Finally, she looked up, "What famous person has left you the most, erm, what Americans call star struck?"

"Oh!" Ellie replied excitedly, unsure of how to answer, "I've been fortunate enough to meet many famous people in my—what is it—eight years since moving to California. I think my biggest star struck moment is kind of pathetic, actually. I kind of don't want to say." she chuckled, an embarrassed smile creeping up on her face.

"Who is it?" Elsa pushed.

"I saw Elvis Presley at LAX once in 1974. It was right around when I'd gotten my first Grammy award. I was coming back from London and he obviously saw I had recognized him and kinda saluted me from across baggage claim before saying his daughter heard my single Dreamer on the radio and loved it. I had an ego boost for like, six months after that." she said, her cheeks burning in embarrassment.

"One last question," the woman paused, looking down at her notes, "What is your songwriting process?"

Deciding she had some time to kill in her off-time, Ellie hit the shops. The town center was nearby and she had some marks on her, why not?

Shopping, as her mother had always told her, cleared the mind. She didn't know what needed clearing, though, the thought of picking up some new garments or records always sounded like a good idea to her.

Stopping at a magazine stand to see if she could find the latest Rolling Stone, Creem, or any other music publication, she found what seemed to be a tabloid. The title was in German, but one of the many images on the cover included a small section for a familiar face. It was Jimmy, seemingly caught in the middle of the street by paparazzi with someone on his arm. Of course the image of the woman was blurred out to entice readers.

Lesen Sie auf Seite 67!

Picking up the magazine as nonchalantly as she could, she flipped to the page marked 67 where, plastered over half the page, was a photo of Jimmy and Charlotte. She didn't think too much of it, turning to the stand worker and asking if he could translate the blurb into English for her—no dice.

"Bist du Ellie Saunders?" the man asked curiously, pointing to her name and tiny photo of hers being displayed on the page.

"Nein." she replied, hoping her tone would convince him it was the truth. With a huff, she gave him the five marks for the magazine and carried on with her shopping, though with a muddled mind.

Trying as hard as she could to ignore the paparazzo taking pictures of her from across the street, Ellie walked into the first record shop she stumbled upon. Flicking through the A section for anything she thought she would recognize, the thought in the back of her mind gnawed at her of what exactly was written beside that photo of Jimmy and Charlotte together. And just why it had her name and photograph included in the mix. Her mind could conjure a million different awful things the publication could have said about her in comparison to Charlotte—she was the mother of his child after all.

She was unknowingly halfway through the A’s when she stopped. Looking around the store, she found the clerk behind the cash register, his back turned as he flipped the ABBA record which had been playing through the store’s speakers.

“Excuse me,” she said as she approached him. As the needle hit the vinyl, the man turned to face her, his expression immediately changing. Perhaps she’d been recognized.

“Hallo, miss! How can I help you?” The man asked eagerly.

Ellie smiled in response, placing the magazine up on the counter and flipping directly to page 67 as if her finger wasn’t already marking the page, “Could you translate for me?” She asked, pointing directly at the blurb beside Jimmy and Charlotte.

The man hummed, taking a look at the small paragraph, then squinting at it before looking back up at Ellie. “It is a piece about new couples. It says, ehh, which woman is better for Jimmy Page. Ellie or Charlotte. It says people like Charlotte more.” he said solemnly.

Ellie couldn't find any words, instead nodding and mumbling a quick 'danke' before going back to the bins at the front of the store.

As she continued flicking through the records, a sinking dread creeped into her chest. She wondered if Jimmy had actually moved on—or back?—so quickly. It made her feel helpless. The jealousy sparked inside of her confused her to no end. Charlotte—as Ellie had reminded herself time and time again—was the mother of his child; a role Ellie knew she could never fulfill.

Her mind was spiraling trying to come up with excuses for him. Why he'd move on, or go back to his ex. Was he done mourning their relationship, trying to get her back? The dread in her body began to settle upon her realization: Jimmy was moving on, Ellie was still stuck five months in the past. Time had been merely passing and Ellie was stagnant in her mentality.

Her nose itched.

Going to the clerk again, she placed two records on the counter. "Just these, please." she said.

"Of course, miss Ellie." he said, tapping at his register before he returned her the change. Thanking him, she made her way back out onto the Hanover city streets. It had started raining since she had entered the record store. The sky had turned an ugly blue shade of gray as thick droplets of rain fell from the clouds.

Seemingly, it was fitting for Ellie. “How ironic,” she said quietly to herself, finding the nearest taxi cab and heading back to the hotel.

As she entered the lobby—as inconspicuously as she could—she could hear a few pairs of light footsteps rushing behind her. When one of them called her name, she turned on her heels in an instant.

Two teenage girls stood before her, clutching at a record in each of their hands as they looked to Ellie excitedly. Fans. She hoped.

"Hi!" she said, greeting them happily. "What can I do for you?"

"We are very big fans," One of them piped up. "We will be seeing you at Festhalle this week."

"Shit, that's great, thank you. What are your names?"

"I'm Sabine. This is Brigitte." Sabine said, gesturing to her friend beside her.

"Nice to meet you both." Ellie smiled, noticing them both looking at her expectantly as they continued clutching at their records. "Did you want me to sign those?" she asked, pointing at the jackets.

"Please!" Brigitte said excitedly.

"Of course," she laughed, reaching out for the items, "do you have a pen or something?"

Quickly, Sabine pulled a marker from her bag, handing it to her. After scribbling her signature down as well as a short message to each girl on the jacket sleeves, Ellie handed each one back to the girls.

"So nice to meet you!" said Sabine, "We will see you at Festhalle." she said before the two waved goodbye to Ellie and scurried out of the hotel's lobby.

With a newfound smile on her face, Ellie made her way to the elevator. As she twisted the key to get into her room, she dropped her bags onto the sofa and made a beeline for the phone, grabbing her notebook that sat on her dresser.

Flipping to the page matching that of two days previous, she saw Roger's neat handwriting in the upper left hand corner.

The line rang twice before there was a click, "Hello?" he said, the soft raspiness of his voice bringing yet another smile onto her face.

"Greetings from Hanover."

"Is this one of those tele-order postcards?" He asked, feigning suspicion. She felt dumb at how just the tone of his voice sent butterflies through her stomach.

She cleared her throat with a laugh, "No, but it is your favorite American who's calling."

"My favorite American? Well who can that possibly be?" he pondered as Ellie tried to hold in her laughter in order to keep on with the joke. "I know a lot of Americans, you know?"

"Perhaps this will freshen your mind: the one you've been following around on her tour like a little lost puppy."

"Oh, Elizabeth! So great to hear from you dear."

"Yeah close enough." Ellie chuckled, twirling the phone cord around her finger as they fell into a comfortable silence, "How've you been, Rog?"

"Well it's been two days, but I'm good. You?"

"Good as I can be, I guess," she said, amusement only slightly present in her voice, "some stupid tabloid got me upset just now. Plus it's in German so I have no fucking clue what it really says."

"About you?"

"Sorta. About Jimmy and his ex. Apparently they're back together or something and people think she's better than me or whatever...It's stupid." she dismissed.

"That's harsh El. But it's just a tabloid right? They print bullshit half the time anyway. I wouldn't sweat it. Plus, you deserve better than Jimmy."

"I am making a career of songs about him, aren't I?"

"Exactly, that's the spirit."

"I guess," Ellie conceded, "Listen, I just called to tell you where I'm at for whenever you come back."

"Oh yeah. Lemme just get a pen and paper." Roger said. There was a bit of rustling on the other end before the phone crackled a bit, "Alright go ahead."

"I'm at the Plaza Hotel in Hanover under the name Jennifer North."

Roger paused for a second, audibly writing down the information, "And who is Ms. North, if I may ask?"

"Just a character from a book I like. Tragic ending."

"Hope that isn't foreshadowing."

"Not unless I ditch music and start doing pornos."

"Oh jeez." Roger laughed.

"Anyway, the show's on Thursday so I'm just hanging out here and doing photo shoots and interviews until then. You know, pop star stuff."

"I'll be sure to be back by then. Perhaps leave tonight..." he trailed off.

"Did you sort out your thing with the band?"

"I did. Ah, just the new road crew confused over where to put my cymbals." he said exasperatedly.

"I thought that'd be self-explanatory."

"I've got a lot of cymbals, Ellie. One day I'll give you a tour," he chuckled.

She laughed, "Alright then, I'll take your word for it." she said, pausing again as a silence fell over them and she realized she was probably keeping him from something. What it was, she didn't know, but she didn't want to keep him from it any longer.

They spoke over each other then, stammering for the other to speak first before Roger insisted she go ahead.

"I was just gonna say I'm probably going to get ready for bed. I just need a hot bath to soothe my nerves. Plus I don't want to keep you on the phone. You probably have other, more important things to do."

"Oh. Okay, well, I'll see you soon then."

"Yeah. What did you want to say?"

"It's okay. It's not important."

"Rog—"

"Ellie, don't worry about it. I'll tell you when I see you next."

Ellie hesitated, "Okay," she said, "I'll see you soon, Rog."

"See you, El."

When she hung up the phone, she looked suspiciously into her room, stumped, and wondering what he'd wanted to tell her. Finally, with a shrug, she started running herself a bath, the water as hot as it could go in order to steam up the room as much as possible.

"Borrowing" a tray from the kitchenette, Ellie wiped it down with a cloth, reaching into her purse on the sofa and pulling out her trusty baggie. Pouring a good amount of it onto the tray, she took the first bill and card she could find and organized the powder into semi-neat lines. Three for the bath, one to treat herself.

Her nose burned after the first line, beginning to feel the waves of relaxation coming over her instantly. She undressed herself in the room, leaving her clothes any which way on the floor and took a "new" book from her suitcase. The cracked spine made the text beneath illegible, but the cover made it much clearer.

Ellie grabbed the tray on her way to the bathroom, setting it on the edge of the tub and shutting the water off as she stepped in. The shock from the temperature gave her a sort of euphoria. When she was finally settled in, she cracked open the book again. Sense and Sensibility. Another classic favorite of hers.

As she bathed, the magazine that lay wrinkled on her bed said the following on page 67:

Jimmy Page and Charlotte Martin

— Now that he and Ellie Saunders have split, it is called into question which model-like lady looks better on Page's arm. Lately, the guitarist has been spotted with the mother of his child looking rather cosy, unlike how he usually did with his former flame. A poll conducted at our offices shows that people prefer Pagey with his longtime lover Charlotte rather than with novice singer Ellie. Sounds like blondes don't always have more fun!

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masterlist | playlist

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