#i've been wanting to do this for a while now heeee

[kaija-rayne-author]

Is Solas neurodivergent?

Of course, unless Weekes confirms one way or another, we'll never actually know. But I'd like to point out a few things.

Firstly. I'm autistic/ADHD, so are my kids and I've been an advocate for invisible disabilities, especially those two, for almost a decade now.

I offer an option on my Patreon for parents (or even just people) who need or want advice.

I have a little bit of a clue here. (More like a massive clue by nuke, but I digress 🤣.)

Why I code Solas from Dragon Age: Inquisition as neurodivergent.

1. Mentally ill fits under the neurodivergent (ND) umbrella. There's no way on Thedas that Solas isn't mentally ill.

(Yes, it really does fit. I'm not going to entertain arguments on the topic. It originally meant 'autistic' it no longer means that and hasn't for a long while. Neurodivergent brains = brains that work in any way other than 'the average'.) The antonym is Neurotypical. I tend to abbreviate them. Neurodivergent = ND, Neurotypical = NT.

At the very least, he likely has survivor syndrome. I'd wager on Depression and CPTSD too. (I have these conditions and am comfortable with saying he has a lot of the traits.) The guy was the leader of an enslaved elves rebellion and a war against the Evanuris. In his own words, he got his hands bloody.

No matter who you are, violence, whether you're the perpetrator or the victim, causes trauma to the psyche. And it went on for actual ages. An Age, in The Dragon Age franchise, is considered to be 100 years, so for hundreds of years, if not thousands, this dude has been fighting. Humans can get CPTSD just from a bad childhood. There's no way he hasn't developed it too.

Survivor syndrome is the response of a person when they believe they have done something wrong by surviving a traumatic event when others did not, often feeling self-guilt. (Can we classify Solas clearly with this? Yes, yes we can.)

He wakes up in a world so horrific to him that he can't even conceive of the people as people.

That's a type of disassociation, which is a symptom of many mental illnesses. Depression is the most obvious. He fucked up, he knows it, he's now trapped in a hellscape. (Heeee, we're all trapped in a dystopian hellscape right now and Depression is on the rise, the correlation is there.)

Disassociation is feeling disconnected from yourself and/or the world around you. For example, you may feel detached from your body or feel as though the world around you is unreal.

There could be a few other things there. He'd be a classic case for Disassociative Identity Disorder, for instance, but given the shit rep on the topic, I'm not going there.

2. ADHD

ADHD is still not very well understood by the average person. Sometimes people think it means we can't hold still. But a lot of the time, the H-Hyperactivity portion is only evident in our brains. For me, for instance, I have to constantly be feeding my brain written stuff or I get very antsy and uncomfortable. (ADD no longer exists, we're all ADHD now.) It's why i developed the habit of reading encyclopedias for fun. (Yes, I really do this.)

Solas is constantly reading, or studying, or thinking.

He shows a pretty typical type of temper for an ADHDer several times. Our tempers can be hot, flaring up suddenly for seemingly unexpected reasons. He absolutely does that. Now, there's always a reason for it, but few people on the outside of us will be aware of whatever the issue is.

ADHDers can also experience incredibly fast (compared to neurotypicals) shifts in emotion. Solas does this. Especially in the after the well of sorrows/pre-breakup scene and the break up scene itself. He see-saws emotionally a lot.

He's incredibly creative. He paints (and probably draws at least a little to paint the way he does). So many neurodivergent people are incredibly creative.

Snark. Many ADHDers tend to be snarky or sarcastic because of, well, everything that usually happens to us in life. The snark and salt simply spill out of Solas. Especially on the 'make him hate you' route through the game. Or any time he's around Vivienne.

Finally, ADHDers very frequently have a deep seated drive to change the world and make it better. Stares at Solas. Yup!

3. Autistic

So, firstly, let me say that most people don't understand what autism is or what autistics look and act like.

As an autistic/ADHD person, my experience of life is completely different from a neurotypicals simply because my brain is wired differently.

Reminder that you can't see autism or ADHD. You can sometimes see common comorbids, but without a brain scan, you cannot see autism or ADHD.

I connected and empathize so heavily with Solas because he's a well written, complex character, and because I love anti-heros.

But also because he's exhibits the exact same type of autistic/ADHD traits that I have. (Both autism and ADHD come in different flavours.) Seeing that rep in a triple AAA game was an incredibly powerful experience.

Even though, given Bioware's absolutely shit rep re: disability, it had to be accidental. I credit Weekes with that rep. I read on Twitter they were recently dxd with one or the other (ADHD or Autism, I honestly can't remember which. And up to 80% of ADHDers are also autistic.)

Solas practices esoteric arts. It's a common thing for many autists & ADHDers to learn and practice arts that just aren't as common anymore. Mine? I spin with a spinning wheel, drop spindle, or Andean hand spinner. I make maps. There's several other strange hobbies and skills I've picked up along the way too.

He shows hyperfocus several times in the game. (Hyperfocus is a trait of both ADHD and Autism.)

He stims with his hands a lot. Especially in the kiss scene. I don't recall seeing any of the other characters do this. I'm not talking about the 'dry hand wash' movements most of the characters do. Solas does a thing I do, taps the tips of his fingers against each other. Whoever did his modelling (is that the right term for making a game character?) understood neurodivergency or are ND themselves. Whether they know it or not.

You could even call his painting a type of stimming.

Stimming is where someone will use repetitive motions or sounds to self-soothe. It's really bad to prevent an autistic/ADHDer from using their stims.

I used to have to have a book on my person at all times. I'm late diagnosed, so I didn't know I was using the books as both a stim and a comfort item.

Solas has something autists call 'flat face effect'. Basically, his face is a bit masklike. He doesn't show emotions strongly on his face or in his body language (unless you make him angry 😅 which is also pretty typical for many of us). I've seen rather a lot of discourse about how emotionless Solas appears. I can read him easily, the emotive cues are there, just subtle, like they would be in an autistic & or ADHD person.

He's a decent actor. Now, most autists will agree that we're not innately good at lying or acting. But we're also really good at acting, at least, many of us are by the time we're adults. It comes from having to mask (autistic masking) almost every second of every day just to survive. Masking kills us. So it's not good that we are forced to do it. But it does make many of us incredible actors.

Anthony Hopkins is argueably one of the best actors of the past several decades. He's openly autistic. And he's spoken of how he got to be a good actor. Dan Ackroyd and Darryl Hannah are a couple of others who are out about it. I code a lot of other creatives as being one or the other, but it’s considered rude to assign a diagnosis like that to a living person. That's for them to do.

Solas managed to stay hidden as a 'unwashed apostate hobo' for however long the Inquisition took to fix things. I've seen estimates of 18 months to 2 years. That's a looooong time to be acting like something you're definitely not.

We see in Trespasser that he's not like that at all. But he still sold it so well his reveal at the end of the game shocked many people.

He's a nerd. An absolute nerd about the fade. Nerdery isn't solely the domain of autistics and ADHDers, but it’s a really common trait.

He's stand-offish.

Many autists and ADHDers are rather stand-offish with people for a variety of reasons.

1) We've been hurt so many times because of people refusing to do half the work of communicating with us. (Trust me, autistics and ADHDers are trying ALL THE TIME to communicate with neurotypicals. Y'all could pick up your part of things, y'know?)

2) We've been rejected so often for a genetic condition(s) we can't change. But accommodations for us, which are usually pretty simple and often help neurotypical people too, are considered 'too much'. There's something called RSD that most, if not all, autistic and ADHD folks experience. Rejection Sensitivity Disorder is a bitch kitty and there's no dealing with it well. It hurts.

3) We're often stand-offish while we try to figure out whatever social rules exist in that space/time. We often warm up when we know (or think we know) the rules. Or once we get to know people.

4) Solas is often alone, he's rarely pictured as being with anyone else other than Cole and the Inquisitor. NDs often end up either pushed to the edge of the crowd, or we choose to stay distant as a preventative measure so we aren't rejected.

Food sensitivities: Solas utterly loathes tea. There's a whole cutscene about it. (Fun fact, Solas doesn't like tea because Weekes doesn't.) But that extreme reaction to a relatively innocuous drink is a classic example of a food sensitivity. Most autistics and ADHDers have food or texture sensitivities or both. I can't abide raw tomatoes, and I'll get the urge to cry if I touch corduroy fabric.

Sensitivities can really be anything, but if you know someone who has them, please understand we're not trying to be difficult or to ask for extra attention or to make trouble. The modern world is frankly hell for most autistics and many ADHDers. Brain scans of us when we’re exposed to our sensitivities show that they actually are causing us physical pain. Pain centres in the brain light up like a Yule tree.

Solas is quiet, until he's not. Then he'll talk your ear off. This is pretty common for many of us too.

Solas and the fade. Special interest, anyone?

Special interests: Most autistics and ADHDers have Special interests. It's something that can utterly enthrall us. We tend to want to learn everything we possibly can about the subject we're fascinated with. And we love to share that information. In something called 'infodumping' we're trying to connect with other people. It's one of the ways many of us say we care about someone. By sharing our favourite things. We're also deeply penalized for something we can't change, there, too.

We deeply enjoy the thing and want to share our enjoyment with people we like/love. This can utterly backfire on us, but it doesn't change the urge to share. Often until our audience is giving us the 'dead fish face'. It's where the person's eyes are a little glazed over and they look a bit concussed. Anyone who has ever taught a class of students or is a parent or child caretaker, or is autistic/ADHD knows the look I'm talking about.

I'll stop blabbing for now, but those are most of the reasons I heavily code Solas as autistic/ADHD/mentally ill. Or, in another word. Neurodivergent.

Thanks for reading! If you have the wherewithal I'm a disabled mom of two disabled kids and a tip would help more than you can probably understand. Another way to help is to become a patron. My work of words is my only income and we live well under the poverty line. Like a lot of other neurodivergent people do.

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[yesyourstalker]

Warabie: ........*sigh*...........

Shimi:.....mmmm

Cirrina:....*snoring*... Hmm ....hm

Ikkan: ........................... She snores like your dad

Merv: hehehe

Cirrina:...mmmmm no I don't..

Merv: *reading*..............hm......oh! ikkan look we're home..... look at that!

Ikkan: wow.....look at all that green. It's been a while since I've seen that much grass........

[hello passengers we've landed in krillarney thank you for choosing the Marlin airport]

Shimi: ugh finally....

Warabie:....*huuuuf*... let's go... So where do we rent a car or something?

Ikkan: we still need to take the ferry.....

Cirrina: *yawn*.... did we land?

Ikkan: Yeah.. let's get out of here. let me get your bag for you.

Shimi: so where do we need to go?

Warabie: You said something about a ferry

Merv: yep we need cath the bus and head over to the dock catch a ferry and head over to the house. When's the next bus coming?

Ikkan: the next bus in 2 hours.....

Shimi: 2 hours? ....ugh!

Cirrina: ok so what do we do?

Ikkan: idk walk around the City. We are 30 minutes away let me just get a scuber.

Warabie: you need to get clothes and everything anyway dad.

Shimi: mmmmm.... alright......

Ikkan: is Mrs Cuddle still open?

Merv: yeah they're still serving food. I warn you now so brace yourself cuz Mrs. Cuddle has been waiting a long time to see you again.

Ikkan: I know

_______________________________________________

Gai: woooow .... So this is all yours. All of it?

Neta: yeah......*huff*...... Yeah it's all mine. I didn't get that much merchandise. I just got a couple t-shirts and a figure, two figures, actually......*huff*.. ..It's actually quite rare. I checked online. They're selling for $500.

Gai: is this your old bass..... All beat up huh? You must have put a lot of love into it

Neta: I I-i did....... Well actually my uh ....my partner he uh......... He put a lot of her love in it. He took it to most of his tours so......

Gai: yeah I heard metalopod guy....... makes sense he seems like your type

Neta:...yeah...hehehe..heeee...*sigh*.........

Gai:...... Really nice place you have here. It's the same size as our house... That's not saying much about our old house....... What's that room

Neta: oh uhhhhh that's that's my daughter's room.....

Gai: oh yeah..... little Cici how old is she now 12?

Neta: she's 15 now

Gai oh..

Neta: Dad why are you here? Do you need money or something? Did you and kat fight or something?

Gai: what?! No! A man can't talk to his son after 18 years of no contact. No phone calls no visits or anything, didn't even get to see my granddaughter.

Neta: as if you ever tried to reach out to me

Gai: well how was I supposed to do that? How was I supposed to reach out to you when you're running around everywhere?

Neta: well you know when you're so used to bouncing from house to house It's kind of hard to stay in one place

Gai: well you know you did have a choice to stay at home but You didn't want that. Nothing was ever good for you

Neta: The fuck do you mean nothing was good for me? You moved me out of the house when I was 6!! You can't even handle a 6-year-old?!

Gai: not you! You were terrible!! You were angry, you were mean, you were spiteful! Almost every week I'd catch you stealing something from me! Every day you'd always have to defy me!!

Neta: I don't know dad maybe if you were emotionally there for me and actually been a father!...

Gai: I did my best!

Neta: you did your best?! YOU DID YOUR BEST?! YOU FUCKING ABANDONED ME!! YOU WERE NEVER THERE!! EVERY CHANCE YOU GOT TO DROP ME AT MY AUNT OR A COUSIN OR AT PULPO'S HOUSE YOU DID!!

Gai:......

Neta: EVER SINCE MOM DIED YOU'VE TREATED ME LIKE I WAS YOU BURDEN JUST A NUISANCE THAT YOU COULD NEVER GET RID OF AND YOUR GOING TO TELL ME THAT YOU WERE DOING YOUR BEST!! .....

Gai: YES!! I WAS DOING MY BEST YOU THINK I WANTED TO DROP YOU OFF ANYWHERE I COULDN'T HANDLE MY OWN PROBLEMS AND THEN I HAD TO HANDLE YOUR PROBLEMS ON TOP OF THAT I COULDN'T DO THAT SO I DID WHAT I HAD TO DO!

Neta:.....*sniff*...........

Gai: I wasn't the perfect father. I was emotionally distant I was neglectful and I was unavailable for a lot of things in your life.... .

Neta:...................

Gai:.... I'm......*sigh*..... I'm sorry..........I really am........

Neta:.....................

Gai: I just wasn't prepared to be a single parent..... I always expected Sydney to be there with me....... when she died.......... I..... I guess I just shut down....... I didn't know what to do so I didn't do anything.......

Neta:..........................

Gai: I just want to make things right.

Neta:..................... I don't think you can dad........I really don't............. The damage has already been done.

Gai:.......*sigh*........ I understand........ I just want you to know that I love you...............

Neta:.................

Gai: even though I had a hard time showing it....... I did.... I really did.... I wasn't there for you because I knew I would make things worse for you.

Neta:........................... So you dumped me in military school!?....................

Gai:.………….……....... When I enrolled you I just wanted you to be disciplined. I wanted you to have structure and order and stability all those things that I knew I wasn't able to give you............

Neta:....................................

Gai: when they assigned you to a combat Splatoon I-

Neta: WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU THINK THEY WERE GOING TO PUT ME IN?!?!?! INTELLIGENCE?! ENGINEERING?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!??

Gai:........................

Neta: YOU KNEW EXACTLY WHERE THEY WERE GOING TO PUT ME DAD!! I WAS EXPELLED TWICE, HISTORY OF VIOLENCE, BAD MENTAL HEALTH!! DID IT EVER CROSS YOUR MIND THAT THEY VIEWED ME AS DISPOSABLE!!!

Gai:.......................I didn't. I honestly didn't

Neta: *crying*.I had to watch my friends die!!!...I had to watch strangers die by my own hand....*crying*......do you know what that does to a person???!!!..... I was 14!!....that place ruined my life!! That place ruined me!...*sobbing*.............

Gai:........*sigh*...........neta

Neta:...*sobbing*.......

Gai: ...................... come here...... alright..... I'm sorry...... I'm sorry..........

Neta: *sobbing*

[hour and 45 minutes]

Neta:.....................................................................

Gai:......................................…...............................

Neta: *sigh*....*sniff*...............

Gai: are you okay

Neta:.no..... I'm used to it tho......[stretch]......*uggg*..how long are you going to be on the surface?

Gai: uhhh I'm planning on staying for a short while...... just trying to get acclimated.

Neta: .......... maybe we can get something to eat.... Maybe catch up and try not to fight

Gai:.....................ok............

Neta:.....ok

_______________________________________________

Mahi: do you even know where you're going babe?

Mizole: yeah I'm just taking the shortcut I know where I'm going

ichiya: can't say the same thing about your career

Umishi: I can't believe you got 3 passes to the tidal wave festival. I heard they were sold out minutes after lunch?

Mahi: so The company that does these shows I think they're called 'meso company'. They work with neta and some other store owners. They help them sell their leftover merch and also let them sell tickets to their shows. One of the benefits is that they get vouchers every month so they can get a free pass to any show they all expire after the year is over

Umishi: ohhh that sounds nice you get a lot of benefits

Mizole: and he just gives you all of his passes?

Mahi: not all of them. He's saving five for Haar fest in the fall. I think it's some metal thing I don't know....I know Candi's going with him.......... Holy shit plucc-eeie's we need to go there!

Mizole: what? No we can't

Umishi: Great! Need to pick up some stuff.... I know we have a cooler but maybe we should get some more water and ice

ichiya: here buy a grill and charcoal and some food while you're at it. the food is expensive at festivals

Mizole: You can't buy your girlfriend food at the show.

ichiya: *glares* . .......... He's an extra 20. Buy yourself a tacky t-shirt.

Umishi: oh nice thanks [peck].... Be civil and don't start a fight. We're using his car.

Ichiya:..............................................................

Mizole:..............................................

Ichiya: soooo ...you and uhhh ..

Mizole: mahi

Ichiya: yeah them........... So did you meet them at the concert or did you just use the concert tickets that were meant for us behind my back?

_______________________________________________

Warabie: wow this place is actually nice. I thought it'd be a lot more........ehhhhhh.. old fashioned

Ikkan: That's because we're in the tourist area. Locals don't live here and people who do live here moved here...... well..... Some locals live here. Noji has an apartment here.

Merv: yep damn shame they'll never truly get the krillarney experience.......

Shimi: which part are you in?

Merv: Wrassel. Wrassel Krillarney

Warabie: they have a shopping district here..... Dad you want to go shopping for some clothes? Maybe a suitcase?

Shimi: might as well since I'm going to be stuck here for a month. Ugh.... Judging from the people here, I don't think they have anything nice to wear.

Warabie: see this why you're here to begin with dad you never have anything positive to say. Come on let's go I'm sure they have some designer brands

Shimi: yeah. for farmers......

Warabie:*eye roll* just text me when the bus is here

Ikkan: alright.......you want to look around Cirrina?

Cirrina: ok you said Uncle Noji lived here?

Ikkan: yeah........ but I think he's home.

Cirrina: please

Ikkan: *sigh* ok..... why do we go to Mrs Cuddles first, get something to eat. They have the best fried cod

Merv: yeah and watch Ida give you a long awaited tongue lashing.

Ikkan:mmmmm

Cirrina: hehehehehe

_______________________________________________

Gai: *eating* so they kicked you out of the band cuz you were sleeping with their old bass player?

Neta:..... Yeah if you want to word it like that.......*sigh*.....*eating*....it was just the front man who had a problem with it the other didn't really care.

Gai: do you at least get residuals

Neta: just a little I get a couple checks here and there. nothing much....

Gai: hmmmm........so how's your business holding up?

Neta:*eating*... It's going great..... opening a second location I'm planning on buying a house getting married lots to do

Gai: oh..........wow....... I missed a lot.....

Neta: yeah......... but......... you're here now I guess.......*eating*......

Gai: I'm surprised you want me back in your life

Neta: I don't

Gai: oh

Neta:.......... but you're here so might as well stay I don't care what you do anymore..... what made you decide to show up anyway?? it's not like I'm a successful musician anymore.... you need money or something?

Gai:.......................

_______________________________________________

Warabie: hey mahi!! How's your little road trip

Mahi: it's umnm

Mizole: why are you still mad that I dumped you!!?? like it's been years get over it ?!

Ichiya: because you didn't fucking "dump me" You fucking ghosted me!!! You ignored my calls! You ignored my text!! You blocked me almost everywhere and didn't explain why!! Dumping someone is telling them to their fucking face not just leaving them confused and feeling like shit!!

Mahi: it's fine we're almost to the festival do you want me to get you something. I can get you a shirt and make you feel better

Warabie: nahhh I'm fine

Mahi: so how's the farm?

Warabie: we're not on the farm yet. We're in the city. My dad was forced to come with us so we have to get him close. It's a long story.

Mahi: oh damn you have to stay with your dad? It just keeps getting worse for you huh?

Mizole: see this is why this is why no one wants to be around you!! You're so overbearing and you overstep constantly! You have no concept of boundaries and you have no understanding of personal space!!

Ichiya: what do you mean? I don't understand boundaries!? I literally did not talk to you for several fucking months because I assumed you wanted to be alone and you know what I did?! I left you the fuck alone!!

Mizole: checking someone's Inkstagram five times a day isn't leaving someone alone!

Mahi: just give me one second........ Hey babe can you stop fighting with your ex please. You two are killing the vibe. Also, you're driving way over the speed limits kind of making me nervous

Mizole: sorry babe

Mahi:....... So when you get on the farm send me a picture and also bring back some stuff

Warabie: like what?

Mahi: I don't know fruit? Or something.... maybe a calf!

Warabie:... Like you take care of that... I gotta go see ya .......*huff*...dad it's been an hour we have enough things lets try to find ikkan.....he mentioned Mrs Cuddles.......... hey uhhh hello do you know where Mrs Cuddles is? think it might be a restaurant.

Stranger: oh Mrs Cuddles yeah? Yee uh jest gotta up to dolly wea pass te fork in roed don lef wen ya reech the stock for coaches It's going to be in the ridt next to the fritter bakery...

Warabie: ..............thank you

Stranger: cod bless.

Warabie: ..................................

Shimi: see this we go to nice places when we travel .... You actually understand what they're saying.

Warabie: Dad....uhg...... I'll just search it.......[ping]....... Here it is...... 'Dollyway pass' is a street name okay.. I think I understand what he was saying.... let's go.

_______________________________________________

Mrs Cuddles: well well looky here. is that Merv?! Haven't seen you in months.... Did your wife ground you again hehehe.... I swear how you found that woman. I will never know

Merv: well I'm just here for a quick visit for the summer.... Just the regular please...... I also brought someone...

Ikkan: ....... hey Mrs Cuddles

Mrs Cuddle: No..... Absolutely not..... ikkan Kane!!........ It's been years since I've heard from you! No phone call, no visit, no email, not even a letter!

Ikkan: I'm sorry

Mrs Cuddle: your brother always drops by almost every month just to see me... And you can't even give me a letter. Not even a holiday card!.... Look at you as skinny as the day you left. Sit down.

Ikkan: hehe I've just been really busy....hehehe I'm really sorry.... I should write to you more....

Mrs Cuddle: you should! ... I've been taking care of you since you were nothing but ink! Changed your nappies and everything....... Still have that stain on my white blouse, it never came out...

Cirrina: hehehehehhehhehe

Mrs Cuddle: and who is this? Young lady well aren't you pretty?.... What's your name love?

Cirrina: Cirrina

Mrs Cuddle: cirrrinnnaa oh that's a lovely name. Is she yours

Ikkan: yeah she's my daughter my partner's the biological father

Cirrina: him and my dad are dating

Mrs Cuddle: oh..... ikkan... I have expected you to be in a relationship.........but then again I never expected your father either so hahahahaha. Have some food it's on the house.. Nice and fresh.... ikkan you drink?

Ikkan: not that much

Mrs Cuddle: stand up.........ummm...tall like your mother...... You can probably drink as much as she can too. I'll give you two mugs on the house

Ikkan: one is fine.........*sigh*........ You like this place so far Cici.

Cici: yeah it's nice. I like Mrs Cuddles she's nice

Ikkan: you'll see her again when I get married...

Cirrina: there's a lot of Octolings and inklings here and they look..... Native

Merv: That's because this place wasn't affected by the turf war.

Cirrina: really?

Merv: when the war started a lot of ink fish moved up here to escape the war didn't want to be part of it. Due to the landscapes we weren't affected by the flood all that much. A little bit of corrosion on the mountain.

Cirrina: so these octolings lived on the surface for their whole life? They were never underground? Like ever?

Merv:.....well a lot of them escaped from the underground...a lot of Octolings work in trade here. Most of these new buildings are made by octolings.

Cirrina: wow..... They don't have turf wars do they?

Ikkan: ehhhhhh..... It's not popular. But they do you have a lot of other fun stuff here

Warabie: ugh..... This place is confusing.....*huff*...... What the hell is a coach?

Shimi: *humpf*..

Ikkan: a coach is just what some call buses you'll get used to some of the lingo the longer you live here...........hey mom I oh-

Koi-koi voicemail: sorry, I can't be on the phone right now I'm currently on vacation and I'm probably drunk hehehehehe leave a message at the tone

Ikkan: ok.... Hi Mom, I made it home safe. Just wanted to let you know that. Enjoy your vacation.bye....... love you....... Let's head to the bus stop and hit the ferry. We're almost home.

Cirrina: Wait you promised we were going to visit Uncle Noji!

Ikkan: did I? I don't remember that.

Cirrina: but you said-

Ikkan: I say a lot of stuff sweetie. I can't keep up with the shit I say let's go

Mahi and Umishi bought so much shit from plucc-eeies they bought a tent and everything they got a lot of knick-knacks for everyone except for @fish-at-fish-fish-resort @catastropic

[nocompromise-noregrets]

💖 Which of your fics is your pride and joy?

🦉Is there another author that helped inspire you to write?

💻What do you write your stories on? Laptop, phone, paper, etc.

🍎What's something you learned while researching for a fic?

🥘What wip are you most excited about?

🎬One of your fics gets turned into a TV series. Which one is it and what network is it on?

heeee, thank you! <3333333 Let's see...

💖 Which of your fics is your pride and joy? Oh, all of them. :D But Empty Vessel-'verse is a particular one, just because I never thought I'd be able to come up with something so all-encompassing. One of these days I will make a chronological-order series of everything that takes place in that 'verse, but it is (still) not this day.

🦉Is there another author that helped inspire you to write? So many! Published-author-wise, Tolkien, Gaiman and Sharon Penman in particular, and in fandom I've known so many people over the years whose work has been inspirational, most recently in particular @lemurious, and you of course (Ellie, Bran and Rowan are a particular joy!)

💻What do you write your stories on? Laptop, phone, paper, etc. Laptop. I can't write on the phone - can't type quickly enough to keep up with my thoughts - and the same goes for paper these days, although I used to jot things down when I thought of them I haven't done that for probably more than 15 years.

🍎What's something you learned while researching for a fic? Ah, I don't research :D If there's something I'm not entirely familiar with I'll generally handwave it. For me, research is something I have to do at work (and don't particularly enjoy there either, most of the time, unless it's something directly relevant to what I'm working on), and I don't much want to be doing it for my hobby.

🥘What wip are you most excited about? Right now I think it's All I Want Is You, which I've been working on the last few days for the May writing challenge and is finally behaving itself again after well over two years of being uncooperative. I'm still not entirely sure how it's going to end, although I'd had thoughts of finishing it with a wedding, but I really don't know if I can be bothered writing one XD I might draw it to a close in the last days of lockdown, perhaps...

🎬One of your fics gets turned into a TV series. Which one is it and what network is it on? Oh, this one is easy - it's Empty Vessel-'verse, and it's on whichever network is prepared to pay for the original movieverse cast and see it through to the end. :D (although they'll have to recast the kids as the Nesbitt girls aren't actually actors and they and John Bell are too old now, and it would be an opportunity to get Paisley Billings and Rosamund Pike in as the Wives and get kids who look like they could be Paisley's kids with Luke Evans XDDDD ) Also I'd love to do Stars and Arrows, which would also need a bit of a budget. :D :D :D

Wheee, thank you for asking! <33333333 Anyone else fancy asking me some questions about fic?

[theabyssalmuses-archived]

Announcement of sorts!

Yes yes, Hime is off her shits and has added 3 more new faces to the Roster. Their info is all up on my Muse Page already cause i’m THAT good babey  

First up! 

Rumia - Touhou Project! 

A Friendly(?) Youkai of Darkness who totally won’t eat you up when you aren’t looking! I’m full of headcanons and love for this little bean, so I look forward to making her bother all your muses! 

NEXT  ! 

Natsumi - Touhou Project (OC)  

An (actually) friendly shrine maiden found within a mysterious ruin upon the bottom of Misty Lake. She’s forgotten her name as of now, but it’ll come to her! (maybe). Feel free to give her dumb nicknames cause she can’t protest given how weak she is! The god she follows is probably long gone by now and her spiritual power is low...and her danmaku skills are severely lacking, and... You get the gist. Bully to your heart's content. 

FINALLY  

Kasane Teto - Wait that’s not Touhou that’s UTAUloid! 

Teto has arrived to sing of joy and love and share happiness across the world! Her voice ain’t the best, but she’ll give it all she’s got to catch up to her rival, Miku! She’s lovable, friendly and will egg you on with some next level cheerleading! Teto urges you to do your best today! 

[knowlesian]

what do you like best about Ed/Stede's relationship? Their friendship, their two-second romance, the whole shebang?

for me, I love how they're just so clearly delighted with each other. they take such joy from having the other around.

i totally agree! in one of the first pieces of meta i wrote for the fandom i said 'queer love is i love you BECAUSE you're so goddamned weird' (or something to that effect) and i not only entirely stand by it i mean it even more now than i did then.

because here's the thing: i love stede fucking bonnet. i love him from his silly head to his big, beautiful heart right down to his oft-oblivious toes. i talk a lot about how stede needed to change because of the things i've been writing lately, but just because i feel like how special stede is matters to why i am DYING to see him woo ed back into his arms and support him through whatever journey ed takes towards healing the wounds of his past, let me say it here: jesus fucking christ, with this one. ohhhhh i love him.

with his gay little scarves and his liminal space ship and his gayass unicorn prow and his fucking... brilliant and generous unending ability to evolve.

i mention seeing myself ed, and wanting to see myself in olu, but plot twist: stede's the character i might see most of myself in, especially in terms of life experience. he's spent his life alone in a crowd: he looks like the people around him, but they are not his people.

(heeee is an obsessive little theatre nerd with a thing for gayass unicorns! and he sometimes forgets real people are people and not just stories he tells himself about how much his life sucks! and i must stress this motherfucker has a pirate ship full of cool clothes and books! holy fuck! that's me!!! i mean, no pirate ship, but if i did... wall to fuckin' wall fancy britches and books, kids.

ohhhhh, do i understand stede. ohhhhh do i love him.)

so the people who look like him: they do not love him. they'll let him warm himself by their fires and they would probably allow him into their parties without needing a fake invite to prove he's even worthy of being there, but he knows he doesn't belong there.

all stede's life, he's looked for the people who feel like him.

and then he met the crew, and they felt so familiar he brought them into his weird little liminal space, without even knowing it giving them all space to grow too; and then, he met ed.

and stede felt (though it took mary asking him one very simple question before he knew) there you are. the person i will one day love; my home.

and then s1 becomes him knowing himself better so that he can stand by ed while ed does the same thing, in his own way... that's just fucking poetry.

(so: i will write you what you actually asked for later! i promise, consider this an iou, etc. i was just In My Feelings about why i really do love me some stede fucking bonnet and they sort of spilled out here without me meaning them to.)