#i've been sick that's why i haven't been talking much in the server
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❤️ Just a little reminder that the world is beautiful because you’re here. Thank you for being you ❤️
awww nat ilysm, the world is brighter for having you in it <33333
#ask#seik-o#kitty needs to chill#I LOVE U NAT#i've been sick that's why i haven't been talking much in the server
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Ghost Headcanons!!
A/N: Sorry for the long wait, I've been sick lately with COVID and recently had a lack of motivation but here's some headcanons about the Papas and the Ghouls that I had written down!
Headcanons of Ghost because I've been in the fandom long enough and I feel like if I say my Mouthwashing headcanons in my other server, I'd get beheaded for having an opinion or something. And because I've held onto these for such a long time.
PAPA'S
- It's obvious that Nihil was a bit of man whore, I'm pretty sure that Secondo and Terzo have different mother's but the same dad. Copia is Seestor's baby boy, and I'm surprised not many people noticed it earlier especially when Tobias' mask for Copia got a nose job and his nose looked just like her's. I feel like Copia was probably babied growing up and was tried to be kept from the Ministry until he got older, mostly because of Seestor being afraid of how things would end for Copia.
- Primo, I'm pretty sure it was confirmed by Tobias, is about 80 years old. I think possibly that Primo is Nihil's brother. Mostly because of age. Primo probably helped take care of Secondo and Terzo whenever Nihil was being a deadbeat, but that's a maybe because Primo was more as seen as the "evil" one and he did say he would throw a brick at a panda's face for money in a interview for a magazine.
- Secondo and Terzo probably make fun of Nihil, more like a father-son bond of just picking on eachother.
- Most people think Terzo is more flamboyant than other's but I feel like from what I've seen in old interviews, he's actually more reserved than his on stage persona. I feel like he prefers to remain quiet, keeps not as much contact with the Ghouls unless needed.
- A small one that I kinda just came up with, Copia secretly smokes when Seestor isn't around because he is afraid he'd get in trouble if she saw. It started off as a joke in Chapter 12: Ghost Goes Hollywood. Then he started to do it more the more stressed he would start to get.
Ghouls
- They roam the Ministry late at night. They prefer to be nocturnal to avoid being seen in daylight. This usually ends up scared the shit out of Copia on late nights when he hears them up.
- Ghouls are more animalistic. They have three different forms. Humanoid, the most commonly seen and can often be uncomfortable for them to be on in stage which is why sometimes the Ghouls would be "feral" on stage which has been seen in many clips. Their "feral" stage, which is a more animalistic form they take on. Think of them as big, elemental demon cats that can either be very angry or very clingy. They tend not to talk much or be vocal. They would communicate with huffs, growls, purrs, or clicks (kinda like Predator). Then the most least common form, which is only seen when first summoned, is elemental. Each Ghoul is usually assigned with a element. Like Mountain is Earth, Cumulus is sky, so on forth. When Ghouls are first summoned, they are pure, raw, elemental energy that needs to be tamed over time.
- When they get angry, their elemental form can slowly peek out. Example, fire Ghouls would get hot and breathe smoke. I really haven't put much thought into the other elements yet but I know I want to come up with ideas for them later on.
- Ghouls live a long time. Even some of Nihil's Ghouls still roams the Ministry, but the newer, younger Ghouls know to stay away from them just in case. The oldest of the most recent era is Mountain. When asked about his age, the response is usually "just an age."
- Another thing I thought of is if they find a partner, they stay partners with them for life. If the partner does die, the other will not move on to a new one and will mourn for sometimes years by hiding away. Each element of Ghoul have a different custom for doing things. Either by mourning, celebrating a new life, or partner rituals.
#ghost band#ghost bc#the band ghost#papa emeritus iv#papa emeritus iii#papa emeritus 4#cardinal copia#headcanon
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Twisted Wonderland Personality Swap AU
Thanks so much for the support on my previous posts, it really means a lot to me. Because of that, I've decided to continue writing for this AU and keep you all updated! I'll also be using this post to answer some of your questions. (In this AU the Housewardens and Vice-Housewardens switched personalities)
I went ahead and made some doodles for Ruggie, Leona, Jamil and Kalim (Ruggie with Leona's eyes scares me tbh)
Questions/explanations/clarifications:
-I didn't change the characters' backstories (unless specifically stated). Riddle still has a horrible mom, Trey's family still owns a bakery, Leona is still second prince, Ruggie is still dirt-poor, etc.
-What changed is how the characters reacted to their respective trauma I guess, which resulted in their personalities changing.
-Their personalities are not exact copies of eachother. For example, Riddle isn't just Trey but with red hair. He's very similar to Trey, yes, but they have a few differences in their personalities too.
-I'll explain how the characters became the way they are over time. Plus, it's also fun to think about it yourself, right?
-I've already worked out Heartslabyul, Savanaclaw, Octavinelle and Scarabia.
-I'm planning on doing every dorm, but I play on the English server so I haven't finished book 6 yet.
-Yes, I'm planning on having the Vices + Kalim overblot, and to do that I'll be using their already canonically established backstories.
-I am NOT a professional artist, nor do I have ANY experience with drawing comics, but just know that I'm passionate about this little project and will work hard to make it as good as possible.
-I'm busy with school (I'm busy in general lol), so I don't have a lot of time to work on this AU- I've been sick for the past 4 days, which is why I could post so much.
-If you have literally any questions, just ask. I love to read you guys' reactions!
Characters:
Jamil wears his hair in a loose braid in this AU, since I don't think he has the patience to braid his hair the way he originally does and his hair is kinda connected to his personality. Jamil is much more optimistic and positive, and he's always supportive. People seem to naturally like him, which annoys Kalim. Jamil always tries to look at things from a positive perspective, trying to make the best out of his situation, though it's not that bad for him, because Jamil genuinely thinks that Kalim is amazing. When he got an invitation to NRC he INSISTED that Kalim come as well. Jamil always wants to throw feasts, and if his master allows it, he'll disappear in the kitchen to cook enough food to feed 3 entire dorms for a week. Jamil frequently tries to get Kalim to relax, because he just wants him to be happy, but Kalim then reminds him that they're at NRC to study. (I already talked about Kalim in a previous post but I'll copy paste it here too)
In this AU, Kalim is much stricter, much more focused and MUCH more responsible. He studies rigorously and insisted on actually working hard to earn his position as Housewarden instead of his family buying the position for him. He’s very sharp, quite intelligent, and is annoyed by his naïve servant and his carefree attitude, who keeps following him around.
Leona is a menace, playful, optimistic and cunning, but he also puts a lot of work into his dorm and school. He knows he has to work had to achieve his goals and he knows that he has a lot of responsibilities. He values hard work.
Ruggie is the complete opposite to Leona though. He is lazy, quick to irritate, and forces lower-classmen to do his work for him because he just wants to sleep. Ruggie is a terrible student, never showing up for class or duties and never putting in any effort. He feels like no matter what he does or how hard he works, he'll never make any changes and his life won't ever get better anyways, especially with a high-and-mighty prince as his Housewarden. He thinks that nothing he does is of any use , so why bother at all, right?
Thanks for reading this word vomit, reblogging would be appreciated lol
#twst personality swap au#twst#disney twisted wonderland#personality swap au#personality swap#fanart#fan art#twst fanart#noahsart#doodles#please reblog#jamil viper#kalim al asim#ruggie bucchi#leona kingscholar#twst ruggie#twst kalim#twst leona#twisted wonderland#leona twst#jamil twst#explanation#alternate universe#twisted wonderland jamil#twst jamil
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Ok hi i have just one quick thing to ask. Can you explain the times where you've gone into servers and gcs and told greg you were mad at her and then when asked why you didn't tell it???
hi I don't usually like to answer these on my Tumblr especially since the situation has so much more than I could ever explain from an ask (when I say every situation I've been accused of has two sides, I mean it! I know for a fact that a lot of the stories people heard are lacking so much context) and I am really not comfortable airing trauma I haven't fully revovered from on Tumblr but I will answer this one. If I'm assuming what you're referring to right (if I'm not, don't be afraid to shoot another ask! i haven't gotten a lot of explanation of what I did wrong from. anybody. Also I am in no way uncomfortable with someone reaching out to me through dms, I would not be mad at anyone who got wrapped up in this situation for wanting to talk. Even Greg, I promise I would be comfortable with dming with her about if asked). (warning this is gonna be rambley, I just woke up)
I assume this would be when I would talk in a gc about my feelings in the relationship. I would like to explain that the only times I've talked about Greg in a gc were when I was mid breakdown or meltdown (often triggered by Greg doing or saying something triggering and then just. leaving me alone. which, happened several times.). Also, I would never talk with anyone that I knew Greg was friends with. I didn't feel like my breakdown gave me the right to ruin anyones relationship or perception on it. Which is, genuinely, the only reason I never came to anyone from the sunshine cult for support about her in my relationship because of how. many toxic that had been done to me in the relationship (which is the reason I eventually broke up with her after months of consideration, and the reason I blocked her. I felt sick talking to it and kept getting flashbacks. just generally felt uncomfortable and decided the best thing would to put distance. I in no way meant to hurt her through this). So, I talked with friends she didn't know very well (like Pip! hi Pip thank you for being supportive when my ex was being weird about my disability). I would like to repeat, I would only do this mid breakdowns.
About not communicating that I was mad. i literally. did. and tried. so many times. One of my earliest problems in the relationship is that we just didn't communicate at ALL. And Greg kept repeatedly hurting me because of it. It got to the point I was scared of her. I tried multiple times to talk about how the things she was doing was hurting me and every time I would be shut down and given excuses. Like that she didn't know how to communicate (I'm actively getting hurt here and I'm trying to express that. so we would end the conversation, I would have a breakdown alone in my room and she would go to bed. and it would happen again. I would like to say in a relationship where both people [likely,I am unsure if I have It fully yet. still researching] have bpd, that communicating is SO important and the lack of it is why we both feel we were hurt in the relationship. Greg never expressed when I was hurting her so I never knew. And I would like to say that it's valid and I'm so so sorry if I hurt you, but if you had told me I would've stopped in a fucking heartbeat. I told you when you hurt me, you just didn't care.). Or that she was dissociating (which is okay!!! often times I didn't even know and then I would be in "trouble" for trying to make her talk In that. Pls I promise if you had expressed that you would talk about this later and not just use it as an excuse for not talking about it ever I would be okay!!! it's just when every single time on four or more occasions, every time I was trying to express how I was getting hurt from toxic behavior. Also a lot of these dissociations wouldn't come until I tried to communicate so. hm. and this happened every time). So after repeated times (throughout MONTHS) communicating things that she would do over and over again, I kinda. gave up. If I ever told her I was mad and didn't explain, I'm so sorry and looking back that was wrong of me to do. but. I did. i did tell her. and after getting yelled at and ignored for hours to days on end for simply trying to fix something that had hurt me. i gave up. Can you blame me for making a stupid decision with someone who would never listen?
Greg at some point also sent screenshots of me trying to communicate for the final time before I gave up to people without my permission. My friend, who actually talked to me about my side of the situation unlike everyone else, sent me what Greg sent. And I was not surprised to see how much of that conversation was cropped out. A lot of the stories being told about me are half-truths, with things left unsaid to make me seem like a bad person.
(this situation also has a lot more behind it so please don't take this statement as all of it. Both this singular accusation and everything else has SO much context. This is simply me trying to explain one or two situations. Like I said, if anyone has any questions about another situation don't be afraid to reach out. I would be happy to talk to anyone who was willing to listen.)
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Why is that guy hounding your replies he's so sick. He's showing dangerous signs of obsession with anyone who's been in the vicinity of Ang's situation. Why on earth is he so invested in a corner of the internet he has no relation to. Just because he has a discord full of people who talk about CSA everyday apparently?? specifically within fandom?? What kind of 1k+ discord is he in where this is a daily topic of discussion? Presumably an all-ages server too. I'm in so many generic 5k-50k+ servers and almost no one randomly brings up fandom of all things let alone CSA specifically within fandom. 'serious' convos in big servers tend to be about IRL like job stress etc, or politics. Every big server I'm in has some form of an active I/P thread or conversation right now. Most people online don't even know what a ship is. What kind of big discords does he hang out in where CSA talk gets passed around as freely and publicly amongst "thousands of members" as gossip I can't stop feeling weirded out.
++since he claims he only finds you via tags it's gonna be funny if he flips out over this new ask where his name's nowhere mentioned, should you publish it.
I mean, to be fair, I have been tagging things with his username, but that's to, y'know, help people who've blocked or tried to mute his username because they're sick of the conversation involving him. I haven't been directly @'ing him, but his name is a tag on posts.
.....However, that still means, at the very LEAST, he is looking up his own name as a tag, and that is just such creep ass behavior who even DOES that
even ignoring how he's come to bother someone who stopped talking to him
But yeah, can you tell me more about this discord thing? I feel like I've heard bits and pieces of that, but I don't know anything about it, or what's true, etc. Did he actually legit say that they talk about CSA so much?
I'm just trying to get facts organized.
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I keep rambling because this is what happens when I don't sleep, I don't eat, all I have is my thoughts, and I'm on the verge of another emotional breakdown, but I don't want to do that, I don't want to do that to my loved ones, who've already seen me in so much pain this year.
I thought about what it was like to have to leave Roosmav, and it felt like to me, killing my own child.
Roosmav is the child that I nurtured by myself for this entire year. I did built such a strong image of them for myself...for Bradley. No one has still drawn bottom!Bradley after all this time and likely will never in an ever-shrinking fandom, and it's still the thing that I've most wanted to do because I love him, I think he's beautiful, and I belong to him. I want to do everything for him.
The thought of living on without my child, without Roosmav, is a life with no purpose, a husk of a life. I don't want to eat, didn't sleep, wasn't able to breathe at the thought of not being able to continue on openly in Roosmav in some capacity.
It won't be immediately, but I need there to be another Roosmav server that I can participate in, one with people as passionate about it as I am, one without content restrictions. On my hands and knees and groveling, I need this. I do want to talk about underage bottom!Bradley. I do want to talk about everything about Roosmav because everything about it is what defines them to me: Roosmav was never to me about bottom!Mav, MommyMav only...it's Becca's egg fics, little dick, Rayson, as much as anything else.
I am sick, and I do want to die. I'm not going to, but I haven't eaten, I haven't slept, because I don't see a future for myself in my current circumstances. I don't want me merely wanting another Roosmav-dedicated space that I can participate in to be a betrayal. I don't remember the feeling of not always thinking to myself, "You're unwanted. You're hated. You're a traitor," for just wanting to talk about Roosmav, drawing Roosmav, writing Roosmav, still being a Roosmav.
I can't even talk to people. Nobody is telling me that it will be okay. I've never directly been able to tell people of my pain, other than writing it on here, and the couple of friends I have left following me and seeing me write what I have. I've never openly gotten any warm words, any encouragement, for anything I've done. And I don't do it because I want praise - I do it because I want friends.
This is all rambling, but I feel I need to link to some of this, especially my court date, because I need to concretely explain to people why I had a mental breakdown last year, why I was so awful to be around and why I was so paranoid, why my real-life fears bled into how I viewed and interpreted harmless, innocent fiction.
I'm so sorry. I'll forever be tortured by the fact that I can never directly apologize to people for my behavior, but I do want to continue expressing thoughts somehow through my work. I want to express my pain, my regret, my remorse, my utter sorrow and heartbreak.
I want a hug. I just wish someone who knew of my experience could tell me: I see you, and I know you've tried, and you deserve to live on, you deserve a chance at happiness.
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Beelzebub's Very Bad No Good Day
***So this is the new format in which I'll be answering requests. In my experience, actual posts get spread further than asks do, so this will hopefully help with that. ANYWAY, I am crazy excited about this request as a major Beel simp and YES I will proudly do this request! Thank you @sinnoman for blessing me with it. -B*** Summary: Beel doesn't get anything to eat one day, and it doesn't go well for anybody.
From the moment Beelzebub woke up, he knew that today was going to be a terrible day. For starters, he had apparently raided the fridge in his sleep the night before, so there was not a crumb left in the house for anyone to make breakfast with. Most of the others had gone and grabbed something from Hell's Kitchen on their way to class, but poor Beel had slept through his alarm due to the food coma his nighttime snack had put him in and had to rush to RAD. The entire school was talking about the monster that they believed had awoken beneath the school. Teachers were on edge ready to evacuate the premises for the earthquake they believed to be happening. Beel avoided eye contact, blushing as his empty stomach continued to rumble and roar throughout the day. He ended up eating a few pencils just to get it to quiet down and even that didn't have much effect. The Avatar of Gluttony nearly cried tears of relief when the lunch bell rang. But it seemed that fate was not his friend that day. He was going to order a gargantuan-sized Little Devil mango slushy, a side of Hellfire curry rice, fried shadow bat, and 108 seed salad and the main course of at least twenty shadow hog burgers with three servings of caramel shadow tart for dessert. Beel was drooling at just the thought of it. He was almost at the ordering station when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Beel growled and turned around, baring his teeth at whoever dared to disturb him.
Belphegor narrowed his eyebrows in concern. "Woah. Beel, relax. It's just me. We've got a student council meeting, and Lucifer has threatened to take away supper from whoever skips out." Beelzebub scoffed as the air around him darkened at the mention of someone taking food away from him. "I'd like to see him try." Belphie raised an eyebrow at his twin's uncharacteristically grumpy behaviour. "Are you alright, Beel?" As though to answer his question, Beel's stomach let out another loud roar, causing several students to flinch and Beel to scowl in frustration. "I'm hungry." Belphie's frown deepened. Beel was always hungry, but he didn't usually let it get to him like this. The younger twin rifled through his own bag before pulling out an obviously full paper bag. "You can have my lunch if you want. I ate a little bit of it during class and swiped a bagel from Mammon during the first period, so I'm not all that-" Before he could finish Beel ripped the bag out of Belphie's hands and devoured it, bag and all. Belphie blinked at his now empty hand and chuckled as Beel chewed. "Man, you must be starving huh?"
Beelzebub merely grunted and continued to chew before swallowing down the small meal. He glanced back at the lineup in the cafeteria and put a hand on his stomach as he thought about the lunch he should be enjoying. Belphie nudged him. "Come on, big guy. We got to get to that meeting. The sooner we get it over with, the more likely it is that we'll end early and you might be able to grab something before class starts again." Only the meeting was not short and quick like Belphie had said it might be. Diavolo wanted everyone to come up with an idea for a school fundraiser, and Lucifer was arguing with Asmodeus on what was and was not appropriate. To make matters worse, you were unable to attend as, according to Mammon, your charms professor had asked you to stay behind afterwards to discuss your progress in the class. The bickering on top of the lack of food in his stomach was giving Beel a migraine and the longer he sat there, the more irritable he had become. Eventually, it became too much and he snapped. "ENOUGH!" he bellowed, flipping the table as he stood. "No one cares about the stupid fundraiser anyway and you're just wasting all of our time arguing over something that will inevitably fall apart and cause an even bigger mess, just like it always does!" "Beelzebub! Watch your tone in front of-" "Shut it, Lucifer!" his brother's gaped at him in shock as he snarled at their elder. "I am sick and tired of you pushing us all around and punishing us when the slightest thing goes wrong just because you-" Beel poked Lucifer's chest hard enough to make him take a step back, "won't take responsibility for your own mistakes!" "Oh shit," Mammon whispered under his breath, as Lucifer's eyes narrowed and his body tensed in defence. The second-born quickly squeezed his way between the two of them and spread his arms to try and create some distance. "Okay! Tensions are high. People are upset. But this is not the place to brawl it out." he glanced over at Lucifer who looked like he was a second away from stringing him up to the ceiling. "Might I remind ya Lord Diavolo is still in the room?" Lucifer looked over at Diavolo, who appeared to be both hurt and concerned by Beelzebub's words, before sighing and fixing his composure. He gave Beel a hard look. "Obviously something is upsetting you, but we can discuss this at home. For the time being, I recommend you work on calming yourself and clearing your head." Beel just growled at him before stomping out of the student council room. He had been about to re-enter the cafeteria again when the bell rang signalling the end of lunch hour. Beelzebub felt his eye twitch before his demon form burst into existence. He let out a deafening scream as he grabbed a table and threw it across the room (students still seated on it, included). Students were yelling and scrambling like mice as the large demon rampaged through the halls. He tore the locked grate off of the serving station and grabbed the nearest server by the scruff of the collar, causing them to squeak in fear. "I'm hungry," Beel rumbled lowly as the demon trembled in his hands. "Get me something to eat now or I will not hesitate to eat you." "R-R-Right away, Beelzeb-b-bub." Beel carelessly dropped the demon, who scattered off to gather as much food as they could. He began pacing like a caged animal. Having been alerted by all the noise, his brothers and Diavolo rushed into the nearly destroyed cafeteria. Diavolo's jaw dropped. "Beelzebub, what's the meaning of all this?" Beel's famished brain didn't acknowledge Diavolo as an authority at the moment. Instead, he was yet another person trying to keep him from eating. "I need food. NOW!" Lucifer's eyes widened in realization as he whispered something to Diavolo. The prince nodded and took a step back. "I'm sure the cooks are doing all they can to get you food right away. But I need you to control yourself before I am forced to take action." Satan had his phone out and was urgently texting someone, as Belphie moved forward.
"You'll get your food shortly Beel. You just need to wai-" "I don't want to wait!!" There was a part of Beelzebub's brain that was aware he was acting like a child. But his stomach physically hurt from how empty it was. He was tired. He was starving. He didn't have the patience for pleasantries. "I've barely eaten anything all day, and people keep staring and talking about me because my stomach just will not stop growling and I'm so hungry that I can barely think straight! I hate it! But I know it won't go away unless I eat, so I NEED TO EAT!" The brothers looked at Beel in shock. They knew that he ate a lot, but they always passed it off as just another quirk that made him Beel. They didn't know it bothered him like this. They thought back on all the instances where Beel had stated that he was hungry out of nowhere, always with a distressed look on his face. Every single time they had brushed him off. Before any of them could respond, you casually walked into the war zone that was the cafeteria. "Alright Satan, what's so urgent that you needed me so badly?" The room fell quiet as everyone's attention snapped over to you and you took in the situation. It didn't take long for you to connect the dots.
You immediately began to rush over to Beelzebub; Mammon stepped forward to stop you. "Woah, MC! I don't think that's a good idea right now!"
You ignored him and continued to make your way to Beel. Seeing you, the small human that you were, made Beel realize just how reckless he had been acting. He held out his hands to stop you and took a step away. "You should listen to Mammon, MC. I-I haven't eaten all day and I-" "You haven't eaten all day?! Oh god, this is worst than I thought." Beel watched as you slid the oversized backpack that he had seen you carry around RAD with you every day off your back and begin to dump out the contents. In a second, dozens of bags of chips, candy, fruits, and other snacks spilled across the floor in front of the two of you. Beel didn't waste a single moment. He instantly began consuming the snacks, causing you to smile happily. "Wha-What?! MC?! Why the hell do you have that much food on ya?!" Mammon sputtered as he cautiously began to approach you. You shrugged. "Beel gets upset when he's hungry, and I don't like it when he's upset. So I stocked up on some of his favourite snacks a while back and always keep them on me just in case," Beel paused his eating to look up at you in awe, "He can't help that he's always hungry. It's not like he asked to be the Avatar of Gluttony." Suddenly there were a pair of arms wrapped around your waist. Lucifer, Levi, and Mammon called out your name as Beel pulled you tightly against his chest. You just grinned and hugged the friendly giant back. "Thank you," he whispered softly into your hair, his arms tightening around you just a little more. "There's nothing to thank me for." As Beel finally began to calm down, the cooks came out with platters of food and shakily laid them out around you and Beel before taking cover back into the kitchen. Seeing that the threat had passed, the other brothers began to approach as well. "You know Beel, I didn't know you had that much pent-up anger inside of you. It was terrifying!" Asmodeus chirped as he plopped down beside the two of you.
"Yeah! You were just like the antagonist in My Boyfriend Turned Into a Cannabilistic Rage Monster, And Now I Have to Stop Him From Devouring The Whole City!!!" Levi began to ramble about specific scenes from the show that matched perfectly with Beel's rampage, causing Beel to blush as he munched on a burger. Belphie sighed and elbowed Beel as he took his seat at his side. "We'll have to make sure that MC's always around you. Just in case you know?" he smiled softly, before looking at his twin with a more serious expression. "You should've told me about all that stuff you said earlier. I had no idea you felt that away about your appetite." Beel looked away uncomfortably as he took another bite of his food and avoided the question. You snuggled closer to him, to provide him with some comfort. Satan tapped his chin as he watched the group. "I'm sure we could talk with Barbatos and come up with some sort of high-protein shake or bar that would better satisfy you. That way you wouldn't have to eat as much." Lucifer glanced over at Diavolo, silently asking if it was a possibility. The prince smiled warmly. "I'll have Barabatos begin working on something right away." Forgetting all about class and the anger that had previously consumed him, Beel looked around at his family. A warm feeling blossomed in his stomach as he felt content with the rare care and affection that they were openly showing. Maybe it had something to do with the thirty burgers he had already ate, but for just a second, Beel didn't feel so hungry anymore. ***Boy that got a little angsty there for a second, but I hope this was to your liking @sinnoman! I definitely enjoyed writing this one, and I think it made me fall in love with my boy Beel even more 🥰*** TAGLIST: @vampwiire @bunna-does-stuff
#obey me#obey me fic#obey me fanfic#obey me beelzebub#obey me beel#obey me belphegor#obey me lucifer#obey me satan#obey me mammon#obey me diavolo#obey me asmodeus#obey me leviathan#RAD#royal academy of diavolo#my writing#writing update#B requests#bumble b#bumble 🐝#b asks#🐝 answers#🐝 asks
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It really makes me fucking sick when people lie about me.
Things I've never said:
"women are whores because globalism"
"women only stream for attention"
Any other "women are bad Hur dur" things.
Because that's not shit I would ever say. Why? I was raised by 3 generations of southern women. I never call sex workers whores, I don't call women sluts ever either. And I'm not trying to look like some "TM Nice Guy" either.
Things I could have said in regards to the above statements, "some women stream for attention" which is factually true, but that's not a statement that implies that men don't. Because guess what, some men do. It's a two way street. One I acknowledge.
Also globalism has nothing to do with women and dating pools. I've literally never said it implied as such. Several stats have come out from OkCupid and other places saying that because of the dating pool opening up, specifically due to dating services and social media, people don't settle anymore. Which is true. And it's not just a women thing. It's men and women. And I'm not redressing this because "I got called out". Just because I quote stats that leave men out doesn't mean I don't blame men for their contribution to participating in hookup culture.
And I'm pretty sure I've made a blog post about this too. Dating pools in towns have dried up for years because of online dating and the rise of hookup culture. Asshole women ruin kind men, those men turn into assholes, whom ruin kind women, and the cycle continues. Also since apparently I have to state it listing women first in that cycle does NOT imply they start the cycle. It's always different who starts it. But the result is pretty much the same. And then only reason I've ever actually discussed this, is because the reason marriages fail so often it's because people refuse to settle down with people. Rather they get online, find someone half a country away, and hope for the best. And even in the process of discussing this topic, I'd also mention that when I say settle, I don't mean settle for an asshole, a douchebag, a bitch, someone whom is abusive, or not loyal etc. I'm saying that you can't attempt to find perfect because perfect doesn't exist. Sadly that's the same as saying reach within your means, which is crude to say but it's also not fucking sexist.
Oh, and the only times I've talked implicitly about globalism is to ask why it's viewed as somehow explicitly left, and why it's a dangerous mindset because as a concept it is anti cultural. But 100% I don't degrade women. I will however degrade people when I feel they deserve it. And through this whole fucking fiasco with the server I got banned from and the people lying about me, other than saying that 1 person has anger issues, and several server members have emotional issues (because who doesn't these days), I haven't smeared anyone male or female. Called anyone out by name, out otherwise. But nah, I get hit by a number of people whom have a decent following, whom try to call me out for fake shit. With the exception of hearing only a few times I broke rules even though in some cases I didn't understand how. So rather than leaving well enough alone, I get smeared over Tumblr. Reblogged by those same people, only to be blocked by those same people.
So yeah. Explain to me, why the FUCK would you talk to me if I HAD called women whores for "deciding to date outside their local dating pool". Fun fact. The women in my family taught me to respect those that earn it. I love them greatly because they helped raise me. And my grandmother would have been extremely disappointed with me if I had been the kind of person to talk like that.
And yeah, I might not always get what I'm saying across well, but when confronted with that I try to clarify.
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feeling like i should at least explain this shitty ass drama I've been in for the last who knows long before NuggetB0iYT comes after me with his gang or whatever you want to call it. more or less, this just feels like someone trying to milk the fuck out of things that aren't even worth riling up anyone over in my opinion.
for all i know this happened a few months ago and my memory is often foggy over things like this so this is as much as i can remember clearly about what happened to me, my friends, and even my boyfriend.
i was on discord, in my boyfriend's server (we weren't dating yet) and i was just hanging out with some friends. the server was always nearly quiet due to Nugget spamming mute on literally anyone he could, but we eventually moved on from that.
for what i know, SpacyQuaser5617 was his favorite to harass. almost daily i could see Nugget talking about things like how Spacy is a baby or how he'd like to hurt him. nearly pushed him to suicide but in the end, Spacy was still alive, and everyone eventually moved on from that (now that im thinking about it i should have tried to help Spacy before he blocked me for whatever reason)
I was in a bad mood at the time and nothing was really helping to calm me down or whatever so I dm'ed a few people, and then I went to the server I usually went before it was deleted by Nugget.
Spacy's 1 week mute had finally expired, and he actually got to speak for a minute. all he says before probably being muted again was something like "i'm back"
Nugget is online and just responds with "welcome to hell"
all I said in response to that was just 8 simple words, and thats what set off the ticking timebomb.
"well, with you here, I can see why"
and I ended up getting backlash after backlash for that. random dms from random people that were most likely alt accounts of him and his friends, and some of the people i knew well weren't spared the backlash either. I swear I saw a channel celebrating one of my friends getting really sick as well.
sometime when I started dating my current boyfriend, videos started surfacing about him harassing someone in perfect English.
it was obviously sketchy with some of the claims.
1. the harassment claims were weird because he was speaking proper english, correct grammar and everything despite him at the time not knowing English that well. (he is Brazilian)
2. the rule 34 accusations seemed more like an inside joke that went too far instead of something to be taken seriously. (if anyone really has any proof William Cat draws rule 34 could you please link here? the one image he has on rule 34 doesn't count since it doesn't match any of his artstyles.)
3. him forcing a relationship on two people that i have looked up countless times and don't show any results. maybe they do exist but there was no proof that i could find of this being real so for now this stays debunked.
there is a few more things i would like to point out, for anyone really looking for some proper dirt on Nugget, but i can't prove too much as usually when he does this kind of thing, it's gone before i can screenshot it.
he has posted NSFW art of bob x opheebop in a server with mostly minors.
he has (if you already haven't gotten the hint) harassed multiple people over and over again, me being one of the victims obviously.
and he has drawn some questionable art of characters, minor characters. (i only have one image but if you ask around there might be a few more people who have more proof than i do)
one more thing to address, he has attempted to try and resolve this, but all he said was the equivalent of that he's black and i'm not.
do whatever you want with this information. if you're gonna take my side, go ahead. if you're gonna take Nuggets side, all i can say is good luck defending someone who's only excuse of why he should keep doing things like this is that he's black. there's a lot more to be addressed, but that's all i can remember. you can dm me on Twitter for the proof. till then i feel like I've said enough.
Locally_Blob is my Twitter username. dm me and if im awake i'll show you the proof.
this probably won't go anywhere as always, but i don't really care if it does anymore. I've tried again and again but it always just vanishes from whatever i post it on. so thanks to whoever keeps spam reporting it to make it disappear or whatever is going on just to protect someone who really needs a wake-up call at this point.
if Nugget can expose my boyfriend for things that happened half a year ago, i can expose Nugget for things that happened half a year ago.
locally339 signing off. goodnight.
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I was trying to hold this in, bc I felt like as a very petite person myself, that I was too "privileged" to say anything about this without looking like I was somehow trying to dig at fat people, or undermine the fight against fatphobia or whatever. I struggle so so much with all this, but feel like that venting would seem selfish or ignorant. But I'm. Seriously at my fucking limit.
If you think that skinny people are never shamed, bullied, body-policed, bullied, then I'm here to say, yes, we are.
Besides the previously mentioned issue with eating disorders, there are so many other factors to consider; genetics, chronic illness and disability, temporary illness with long-term damage, domestic abuse in the form of withholding food, certain medication or treatments, pressure towards people in sports modeling acting etc etc etc (just look at people dehydrating themselves so they look cut), mental illness or neurodivergencies that hampers someone's ability to take care of themselves...the list goes on.
I was born premature and have been anemic since day one, because my body actually cannot absorb everything it needs to. I grew up with divorced parents, with a father that periodically made fun of me for "eating like a bird", a mother who was never around, and a step-dad who was just overall a horrible person.
I never grew past 12. No exaggeration. It's due to more genetic bullshit, possibly a form of "proportionate" dwarfism, so it's not obvious to strangers that I'm a grown little person with the typical features. Being a full-grown adult, who is 4'9" and 85lbs soaking wet, and honestly fairly flat-chested, means that literally. Every. Single. Person, that doesn't know me, looks at me, and they see a child. None of the "oh just gonna ID you as a formality, you just look a little younger", no it's always "wow, really...? No joke? For real..??", or "how old are you, why are you here and not in school right now, if you're not lying I can call on you for truancy", or "oh wow I thought a 12yr-old got a hold of the ID-check stamp pad for a second haha". And even once they know, it's like they never really accept it, and still treat me like a child.
I've been bullied, a lot. People playing keep-away with my things, new teachers thinking I'm in the wrong class and that first impression leading to a semester of communal judgement, always being compared to more "appropriately developed" girls my age. For my senior project presentation, the judges left notes like "immature".
Always being handed the kid's menu when everyone else at the table gets an alcohol menu. Having no less then 2-3 people check my ID, just to be safe, of course, when I correct the server and ask for a drink. Going to bars or casinos or adult shops and having someone put an arm in my way while the rest of the group went in no problem, because they think I was trying to sneak in with them. Trying to see an R rated movie. Trying to buy age appropriate clothes but the only stuff that fits is in the kids section. People making whispered comments about how my parents MUST be starving me, or how I might have an ED.
Besides my anemia and stature/growth problems, I grew up in a poor household. I've been homeless. I have several mental and physical illnesses and disabilities that make gaining or maintaining weight an uphill battle. Since getting sick, I've lost most of my muscle, which weighs more than fat. My body is currently not processing fat well, if at all, which means it's going right thru me. I was told that my bowel issues are because of my size (yes, really), because while my organs tried to grow up, my musculoskeletal system lagged behind, and everything is just kinda fucked (which might be achondroplasia, but I've been focusing on other medical shit first and just haven't really had that talk yet).
And to top it all off, OCD, PTSD, and Autism can (and have) affected my eating habits, especially with my cramped neck region and texture issues causing an overly sensitive gag reflex. My teeth are also victims of my other bullshit. My teeth are super cramped and we don't have the money to pull my wisdom teeth. Being poor and homeless meant dental health and general really took a hit. Sometimes, my teeth or jaw hurt, or my nerves flare up, or my illnesses cause sudden vertigo and nausea. Some days, it's just plain hard to eat.
I know this was a long, personal, strong rant, but this is how bad I, and a lot of other thin people, can really have it. We didn't choose any of this, and have no control over it.
I want everyone that reads this, no matter their weight or health, to read this and really, truly take it all in. As absolutely disgusting as fatphobia and fatshaming are, using it as an excuse to damn all skinny people? That can be just as disgusting. We aren't "thicc" or "big tiddy goth girlfriend", or a "milf". A lot of us have never felt adult or beautiful or attractive in their lives. I still feel shame around my wife, who is such a lovely person, for feeling like I can never be hot or sexy hot them, or because yet another person thought I was their child and not their partner.
In regards to the original post, and my addition, it mostly started awhile ago, when a mutual starting tagging things with shit like "skinny people die fr" or "skinny people are useless" (paraphrasing a bit, I didn't want to bother screenshotting then). Seeing that shit hurt me to my core and made me feel ashamed for just. Existing. For the first time in ages, I started gaining weight, quickly. Because I was subconsciously so hurt that I started eating past feeling full, straight to stomach pain and nausea. I've since last everything I gained, mostly because I've recently had such bad digestive issues. I'm so dehydrated.
I soft-blocked because I was scared of conflict or them somehow finding out. However, after some time, I finally had enough of seeing them in my notifications and blocked them for good. I couldn't see their url without feeling that same hot shame washing over me.
Did it help me feel better? Not really. But it's still one more little roadblock from having to get reminded over and over again.
You may think it's progressive or woke or whatever to say shit like that, because we're all just vain, privileged, attractive people, right?
I am begging you all, please, don't say shit like this anymore. You can't possibly know when a certain content will really hurt someone in a very, very bad way.
And no. There is no "okay but what about regular ski-" no. Fucking no. Just stop. Besides making assumptions, it's just not healthy to be like that. Telling anyone to die is pretty fucked as it is. And yet it gets a pass most of the time because it comes off as woke or casual, but that just perpetuates it all.
I'm so tired. So fucking tired. And depressed. And just.. overall done with it all. If this makes me an asshole or toxic to you, then okay, whatever, unfollow me and block me if you need to, even if we're mutuals. I just can't take one more fucking thing happening, one more thing hurting me. There is nothing that could be said or done to me that would matter.
Please. Please just. Try. Just a little.
Listen, I gotta be honest because I keep seeing this on my feed back and forth on my main and here when I browse blogs:
When people say shit like 'skinny people are cringe' or 'skinny people are not welcome' or anything along those lines, in the hopes to boost fat/large body positivity, you are the problem.
You are literally what is going to cause so much more body dysphoria then you realize. A lot of times, as we already know, people can't control their body shape and size! Sitting there and blasting folks who are slender, lithe, skinny, etc is not the answer. You don't know who is now recovering from an ED or who is literally so sick beyond just a normal everyday illness that they have no control over their weight or body image.
This is coming from someone who IS fat and chunky and already has body dysphoria because of it. Someone who HAS resorted to eating disorders to try and solve things and is recovering. Someone who has a wife who constantly is so sick that she can't retain anything from food to properly nourish her body and be able to gain weight like everyone else.
So please stop putting shit like that in your tags and stop putting shit like that into posts. You don't know who you're hurting when you say that kind of body shaming talk. I'm all about body positivity, but can't everyone's body be positive for a change? This isn't a competition, this is trying to survive in this fucked up world for once.
#long post#disordered eating mention#eating disorder tw#illness mention#possibly upsetting content#chronic illness tw#fatphobia mention#weight issues#I'm kinda scared to post this bc this could easily piss someone off for 'undermining fat people struggles' but goddamn I just want to exist
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