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#i've been playing the stuff at the end of this self-teach book but that's only like 5 songs so what am i to do lol
keeps-ache · 7 months
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unfortunately i enjoy these sad little tunes on the piano and my mother will simply have to Deal
#just me hi#sorry but d minor speaks to me spiritually [sunglasses drop and i start slamming on the keys]#hbfhs but i do feel a little bad about it. so ye sorry mother dearest but the sad little tunes were created specifically for my ears u-u#i must learn. more songs#i've been playing the stuff at the end of this self-teach book but that's only like 5 songs so what am i to do lol#my dad handed me. schubert#my dude i just. i don't. you believe in me too much Lmao#//crazy tho did you know that there are apparently people in this world that really truly believe i have a functioning brain??#that's crazy man. cough#lol they're prolly not wrong but man.. i should Not have been given this thing hvfhs#feels like it operates at 2% efficiency at All Times except for 2-4 a.m. where my brain chemicals then swap places like the worst#game of musical chairs on the planet Hbfhv#//oh speaking of brains if you had to switch brains with somebody who would you trust to trade with?#i was thinking one of my siblings but dear lord. i would never want to do that to them Hfbvshfvsh#'why one of your siblings' they forgive me for a Lot of weird stuff hfsh <33#plus. there could be worse ways of coming out Hfbhsvfhs + they'd have my perspective on it at that point so ! :>#or i think i'd leave it at an orphanage like they do in the movies. in a cardboard box n everything :)#technically not a switch but you know somebody's gotta use it for something loll#//anyway i gotta work on this thing#siiiighhghghgh why is the beginning so hard lol :')#i am ON my way !!! [runs towards you and vanishes]
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krisp-xyz · 1 year
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Found your work. You inspired me to take another shot at technical art and graphics programming. Do you recommend any specific resources for getting started and beyond?
Thanks so much! Really glad I could inspire you to do that bc graphics and tech art things are so much fun :D
(Also sorry for the late response. I've been a bit busy and was also thinking about how I wanted to format this)
I'm mostly self taught with a lot of stuff and have done lots of research on a per-project basis, but Acerola and Freya Holmer are two of my favorite channels for learning graphics or technical art things. Shadertoy is also an amazing resource to not only create and view other's shaders, but learn about algorithms and see how people do things!
While I don't have many general resources. I'll steal these resources for graphics programming that Acerola shared in his discord server:
For getting started with graphics engine development: DX11: https://www.rastertek.com/tutdx11s3.html OpenGL: https://learnopengl.com/ DX12: https://learn.microsoft.com/en-us/windows/win32/direct3d12/directx-12-programming-guide Vulkan: https://vulkan-tutorial.com/
For getting started with shaders: catlikecoding: https://catlikecoding.com/unity/tutorials/rendering/ the book of shaders: https://thebookofshaders.com/ daniel ilett's image effects series: https://danielilett.com/2019-04-24-tut1-intro-smo/
For getting started with compute shaders: Kyle Halladay: http://kylehalladay.com/blog/tutorial/2014/06/27/Compute-Shaders-Are-Nifty.html Ronja: https://www.ronja-tutorials.com/post/050-compute-shader/ Three Eyed Games (this one teaches ray tracing AND compute shaders, what a bargain!): http://three-eyed-games.com/2018/05/03/gpu-ray-tracing-in-unity-part-1/
I also wanted to talk a little bit about I do research for projects!
A lot of my proficiency in shaders just comes from practice and slowly building a better understanding of how to best utilize the tools at my disposal, almost like each project is solving a puzzle and I want to find the most optimal solution I can come up with.
This is definitely easier said than done and while a lot of my proficiency comes from just doodling around with projects and practicing, I understand that "just practice more lol" is a boring and kinda unhelpful answer. When it comes to projects like my lighting engine, I came up with a lot of the algorithm stuff myself, but there were certainly lots of details that I learned about from past projects and research like ray marching (calculating the ray intersection of a distance function) and I learned about the jump flood algorithm from a tech artist friend (calculating distance functions from textures)
Each new algorithm you learn in various projects ends up being another tool in your toolbox, and each project becomes a combination of researching new tools and applying the tools you've learned in the past.
One last example. I made a Chladni plate simulation in blender (that thing where you put sand on a metal plate and play noises and it makes patterns) and it started with me researching and looking up chladni plates, I watched youtube videos related to why the sand forms the patterns it does, which ended up being due to how the sound waves displaced the plane. I googled some more and found the actual equation that represents it, and used it to simulate particle motion.
Figure out some projects you want to do and just do some googling or ask for help in game dev discord servers or whatever. Lot's of research on a per-project basis is honestly how you'll learn the most imo :3
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sol-draws-sometimes · 8 months
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20-24 inclusive and 44
Oooo hello Anon, you're a nosy-nelly, but that's fine cause I love to talk! Tho strap in cause this is gonna be a long one! Questions can be found here!
20: What I hate most about myself
Oof starting off on a downer. I'd say it's my passiveness. Which some may say is weird cause a lot of people would describe me as passionate and on the outside I do appear very organized. But I just have so many things I want to do, that I just don't. Like, I want to learn to sew, compose music, archery, read books, play video games, watch certain shows or movies, etc, but I just... don't. Yah part of it is that there's so much I want to do it's hard to pick one. And yeah I have ADHD, aka the "I can't do shit disorder," where executive dysfunction is my worse symptom. But even if I didn't have ADHD, I still feel like I'd be like this. Also, it's not just hobbies. I had flying ants in my room, and I told my parents about it, but then I stopped pushing them about it and I just sucked it up for serval months. Or I end up going to Community College because I put off applications until the last second, and I am currently really behind on transferring applications for my BA. Or I'm not as informed politically as I'd like to be because it's stressful to me, but then I'm not acting according to my beliefs which is also stressful. That's not to say I have no initiative. I taught myself cursive and how to touch type in middle school. I started posting my art on the internet, all of my art has been self-taught. I took my mental health into my own hands and hyper-fixated on mental health for years so that I could be in a better place. It's not good to be dwelling on the parts you hate about yourself, but I do genuinely believe it's trait about myself that I want to work on.
21: What I love most about myself
Okay, something more positive! Uh, people tend to say I'm a very bright person, or that I make their day and I'm glad I make people feel comfortable around me!
22: What I want to be when I get older
Okay here's the problem, I want to do everything yet I don't know exactly what I want to be(I'm literally only 19), but I do know the average person has multiple jobs/careers in their lifetime(rn google is saying 12), so here are a couple I know I want to do!
Teacher: I've always wanted to be a teacher since I was a kid, and while many people assume I want to be a music teacher, I'd honestly love to do any subject. Preferably STEM or History, tho being a music teacher would genuinely be fun I'd love to conduct a choir. I think rn I'm more interested in learning about the world than learning about pedagogy, but definitely a job I plan to have at some point in the future
Museum worker: My twin asked me if I'd ever considered working at a museum last year, and I'd never had but honestly it sounds like a perfect job for me! I love history and science, I could still teach people, and I love going to museums. Also, the behind-the-scenes research or archiving sounds very up my alley!
Archivist: Kinda related to the previous one since you can be an archivist at a museum, but idk it sounds like the type of work that my brain would vibe with. Organizing and researching stuff. Also, it's pretty cool to be able to work with primary sources of stuff, like that's so cool! And I get to preserve information so that down the line people aren't crying about how little information there is about [insert topic]. (also haha yah, yah I like tma, hardy har, shhhh, that isn't even one of the reasons, just a coincidence)
Scientist: Pretty vague term cause idk in what field but I know I've always liked science! For a frame of reference, I would probably doing some stem major if I wasn't a musician. I had finished my science course my second year of high school, I didn't have any science classes for two years. Then at the end of senior year, I listened to Stella Firma and there in b/w sections where they had a scientist fact check the show was so interesting and made me remember I liked science and it's actually super cool! I'm hoping that next year once I transfer, I'll be able to take steps to at the very least minor in Physics and start doing some STEM stuff. Tho tbh I'm just choosing physics cause I'm good at math and astrophysics/cosmology sounds very cool to me. But finding @a-dinosaur-a-day on Tumblr made me remember my dino phase in middle school! I'm less interested in learning about individual dinosaurs and more on the big-picture evolutionary side of things, but the schools I want to transfer to don't have geology majors and I prefer physics over bio. Also, paleontology is a neat combination of history and science! Tbh, I'm still figuring out what I want to do science-wise, but I know it's something that I'd find interesting as a job!
Choir/Band/Singer/Theater: I'm a singer but I don't want it to be my main job, job, since I'm never wanted to be a super famous, but I do like singing and I'm good at it, so I could always make money on the side. Also I've also preferred singing in choir than solo rep, so if I joined a travling choir or band with an emphasis on harmony(like abba for ex), I think that would be really fun as a job for a while. As far as solo singing, I prefer musical theater so I can see myself doing that for a bit(even if it is ensemble since I like that kind of thing), and who knows, I am intrested in writing some solo music, but I haven't really done that
Composer: I want to learn how to compose music but I haven't. Oddly enough, I am more interested in composing instrumental stuff than songwriter music, tho I do want to do that. Or compose musicals, especially one in Spanish, that would be so cool. Tho I'd probably have to work with a lyricist. Even if it's not my main job, I'd love to do it on the side
Sound Design: Now this one you can blame on tma. I listened to the Q&As where they talk about Sound Design, it's absolutely fascinating to me, plus, if I learn how to compose, both could work pretty good together!
Art: Idk if I want to be an artist for a job, but once I'm good enough at drawing, I'd love to do commissions, or if I learn how to animate, working on an indie animation project would be such a cool thing! Or do a comic! I'd love to do a comic, doesn't even have to be my story! Years down the line, after graduating, I want to go back to school and get some degree in art! Doesn't need to be from an expensive school, probably will be from some local college near me at the time. Not that you need one to be a professional, but I find I learn best in a school setting and it's something I'd love to do to improve my art!
Can't believe Rusty Quill has inspired two possible job careers I-
23: My relationship with my sibling(s)
Oldest to youngest! My older brother didn't grow up with me but we visted his house alot! Tbh, I'm closer to my niece than I am him. He's got some beliefs/politics I don't agree with and he can be intense sometimes, but generally I have a good relationship with him. I don't talk to him much tho. And he's homophobic, so yah, don't plan to be too close to him anyway. Next should be my other brother but he died when I was 4, and he was in Cuba so I have no memories of him, so neutral I guess. Things were pretty rocky with my older sister growing up but we're pretty good now! She's like the one "adult figure"(I'm an adult but you know what I mean) in my life that I feel the most comfortable around. Then my twin is the person I'm the closest to. Yah we bicker and stuff, and we do things that the other doesn't like, but overall I'm the most comfortable around her. I also feel like she's the person who understands me the most, I genuinely don't know how I would've been in middle school if my twin didn't exist. Idk if anyone remembers the scene in the season 3 final of Bright Sessions, but you know when Mark goes to Adam's room and they sit and silence and Mark is like"I know we both know what we're feeling but we should still talk about what happened" I feel like that's kinda my twin and I. Anyways, I love my sisters very much!
24: My relationship with my parent(s)
Kinda rocky and I don't want to get into it too much but they're immigrant parents™. However, for literal boomers, they're actually pretty good. I'd say they're good parents but there's alot about them that frustrates me. Also living with them makes problems exacerbated. They're trying their best to understand me, but they don't and I don't feel comfortable talking to them about my problems with them. I'm also not out to them, so there's always a part of me they're not really seeing. But when it matters they're there. And they've been pretty supportive of me being in the arts. My dad was also pretty present in my life, which sucks that I have to specify, but I do.
44: A random fact about anything
There are two versions of the Latino dub of Sleeping Beauty and people fight about I think. I grew up with the 2001 ver but people prefer the original 1959 dubbing. My preliminary stance on this without having seen the full 1959 dub and only some clips is that the Queen's acting is better in 1959, but the songs are bettered dubbed in the 2001 version(suck it up nostalgia is winning)
Okay, that was a lot! BUT, there are more questions so ask away!
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hello-nichya-here · 2 years
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What is your opinion on Katara as a character. How do you think she should develop after the show ends. Many were upset at her comics portrayal almost as much as Azula.
As I've said before, the comics are just Yang's fanfic, with Zuko being his self-insert into the story. I do not take it as canon.
As for Katara in the original show, I actually had a conversation about it with @dragomer very recently. Our conclusion was basically that she is mostly a good character that we still like, but there were moments when the writers dropped the ball simply because of lack of attention.
She starts off struggling to bend, especially when compared to Aang, then suddenly she can put up a pretty good fight against Pakku, becomes Aang's teacher, and is basically shown as a prodigy.
We see her steal from pirates and use the fact that they stole all the stuff they have as an excuse, then berate Toph for doing the exact same thing in "The Runaway"
Again, it's nothing too major, say like the complete character assassination everyone went through in the comics, but it could have and should have been done better, especially in the later seasons (I give book 1 a bit of pass since the writers were still kind of figuring the characters and world out).
For her future, I imagine that she will still be with Aang, and they'll spend half of their time in the South Pole, trying to rebuild it with her family, and the other half flying all over the world to help people, or to visit their friends, or just because they want to go on a vacation somewhere nice. Whenever she's not on work mode, she's playing, being goofy, just relaxing a bit, or enjoying some quality time with her loved ones.
She'll be a known healer and fighter, and will sometimes teach some special classes in the North Pole, but mostly her focus is on helping the waterbenders of her own tribe as it grows once more.
I see her and Aang getting married in their early 20s, but only having kids much later on (mid to late 30s), when they're more mature and the world doesn't need their help as much as it used to on the years immediately after the war.
I see her, Aang, and honestly the entire Gaang, being the kind of old people that are trouble makers, way more than they ever were as kids, because with the world almost completely stable, and their children fully raised and independent, they don't owe shit to nobody anymore and will do whatever they want.
Katara will be probably be the kind, loving granny that will just say some wild shit about her life when she was younger to bait her grandkids into begging her to tell them about how awesome and badass she is and she will go "Well, if you insist... here's how I literally I brought your grandpa back to life, saving him, the Avatar cycle, and the world all at once"
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forgottenthreads · 3 months
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If I could force the whole world to read a book I'd have to write it first.
The title would be
And for you it was a normal fucking Tuesday.
Trigger warning: mental health issues, references to self harm and suicide, bullying, abuse and so on.
Project is hopeful but if you're not safe to read or talk about these topics right now then do not continue. Feel free to come back when you're in a better headspace. The blog has been tagged mature content.
The book would take accounts of abuse, bullying and neglect, depression, anxiety and more. Every other page a new author (maybe more often than that), a day in their life taken from diaries or blogs or Retellings of the things they actually experienced.
Today I played tag with my friends and they kept tagging me and didn't give me a chance, I cried when I got home. (Age 5)
I'd want it to start fairly light, get really dark and return with hope at the end. Compile One story with a thread through all the bad days, though no one person experienced it all every experience in the book would be a real one someone experienced somewhere...
I'd want to cover. How it starts. How it feels. How it effects people. How it gets worse. How it destroys confidence and enjoyment. How it hurts. And how people have helped.
I'd like for the book to be an everyone and anyone story not getting hugely into the identities of each author as it goes along. Ideally I'd like all the harsh things to be translated for the person reading it, so every account appears to be from someone exactly like the reader and only at the end would it be revealed the people who collaborated on the book. This could be done by having different versions with different generic faces on the cover but might not be feasible.
Today I was working on a bridge project in class, my bridge exploded when we tested them. Rather than helping me pick up the pieces some of my friends threw splinters of my work at me and the rest of the class laughed. (Age 12)
Towards the end of the middle of the book I'd want to include outcomes, this person survived, this person escaped, this person made an attempt, this person is no longer alive, that person is in prison, that person escaped punishment.
I want it to be a book that horrifies and forces people to come to terms with the worst that humanity could do to each other.
I've stolen more painkillers from my dad, he hasn't noticed yet, redacted for reader safety, no one sees the pain I'm in, I don't see a future for me (age 15, author was hospitalised and emancipated, parents investigated for neglect)
I want it to teach empathy though I fear there are people who might use it as a template to abuse others or get away with the abuses they already commit.
I want it to provide hope for those who are going through horrors of their own but I fear it would drive people to do things that cannot be undone. Providing corrupt inspiration. I do not want to provide a step by step guide but I also don't want to pretend the worst stuff doesn't happen
I live another day, I don't know why but it isn't all over for me. Today wasn't as bad as I'd expected but I don't know how to continue (Age 12 after an attempt)
The title comes from somewhere else on the internet where an abuse victim talked to their parents about the abuse they experienced as a child, and for them it was trauma and for their parents it was forgotten because it was normal behaviour for them.
I'd hope that it would reach people across lines of bigotry: abilism, racism, homophobia, transphobia, ageism, body shaming, eating disorders, mental health disorders and more. But I fear it might provide reasons to be dismissive of people because of their struggles.
The story in this book was made from the accounts of a thousand volunteers and surviving relatives of deeply troubled people. The entries consisted of stories from people across the world including at least one from every nation, many have been translated with the help of the authors. Though no entry will be tied to their name contributors have been listed on the following pages where they have wanted to be identified.
I've included accounts from myself and my friends with their permissions for illustrative purposes, I understand it will be hard reading but if you'd like to post one day of your own in the reblogs I will try my best to read every one they can be light, they can be tough, they can be hopeful or dark, funny or sad. These were short to fit the quote/extract format but you can post as much or as little as you'd like. Similarly if you have diary entries and want to let me know but can't post them publicly comments are a perfect place to let me know those exist so I can reach out to you if I get to that point. I am not a polyglot so if you are bilingual and would like to translate my post into your first language in a reblogs I would encourage that, but don't translate the content of others without their permission. For those not reading this in English I may read your entries using Chat GPT or Google as translation tools.
While unlikely if I did get enough content to put this book together I would seek permission from all contributors to republish their work and work with them to ensure things are fairly and accurately represented, including with translation. I would like to give all contributors an advanced digital copy of the book to approve before publication (translated where necessary) though this may not be feasible. And since the work wouldn't really be mine I'd want to donate as much of the author's profits to mental health charities as I can.
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theghostpinesmusic · 1 year
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On Reading In Circles
So, I'm on sabbatical during the upcoming academic year. Technically speaking, this sabbatical runs from this coming September until September 2024. Accordingly, I'd originally planned to take this summer as a "normal" summer break, maybe spend a little of my free time formulating ideas (mostly while sitting in tents during rainstorms or taking afternoon hiking breaks perched on this or that high rock) and then dive into "properly" working on my sabbatical project starting in September. If you're a frequent reader of my word-dumps, though, you know that at least for the last few weeks, the wildfires, the smoke from the wildfires, the general weather, and now my own health have not really cooperated with this plan (the month before this one was AWESOME, though, it bears repeating). I have this fragile hope that September will be better for hiking, and that maybe I can take advantage of not having to teach in the fall to do some September/October/November backpacking trips, but that remains to be seen. In the meantime, I made a promise to myself that if I work now, during the time of year when I'm supposed to be taking a break, I can play later. We'll see how that pans out in the end.
What it means for now is that over the last two weeks I've dove (maybe we should change this to "diven"?) into a huge initial reading list of texts and essays relevant to the project as a way of getting my feet back under me as a researcher (the last time I really did serious research in the field was 2013) with the idea being that these texts will be the foundation that guides how I write over the next year and beyond.
Mostly by chance (though partially because I already own them and it's expensive to buy theory books), I've started by reading through a lot of the same books I read during my dissertation research, back in 2010-2012. In most cases, these are even the same literal books: I've found a ton of my old notes in the margins, brackets around relevant passages, complaints about the quality of coffee shop sandwiches, etc.
At first, honestly, this felt a bit silly to me. These books are not, generally speaking, short reads. They're extremely complex and time-consuming, and, in theory at least, I've already read them and internalized the core concepts (albeit a decade-plus ago): shouldn't I by reading new stuff?
The process, though, has actually been fascinating: many of my old notes are on concepts that I have significantly developed (and hopefully improved) my thinking on since the 2010s, if not exactly through new research, through conversations with my friends, colleagues, and students, and through just living my life (which tends to be filled with a significant amount of self-reflection, for better and worse). Lots of quotes I emphasized before now show symptoms of that sink-or-swim way you learn to read in grad school: plowing through 500-1000 pages of reading assignments a week necessarily forces you to speed-read, digging for quotable quotes instead of trying to (or being allowed to take the time to) understand the whole argument. It feels like I'm actually reading and understanding many of these books for the first time, in spite of my essentially being granted a Ph.D. for having read them "well" the first time.
And this brings me to the point of this latest of word-dumps, which only still requires an (incredibly brief) description of my current project as a setup.
So, in addition to some pedagogical/class development work, the main purpose of my proposed sabbatical is for me to have time to research and write a book proposal. What's the book about? Well, I'm not glad you asked! In (very very) short, the idea is to use the heuristic (nerd alert!) of summits and circumnavigations to explore how the humanities can contribute to the discourse around global warming. There are about a million topics that get caught up in this currently in my head, but essentially the idea is that summiting a mountain requires a series of epistemological assumptions about one's place in the world (experiences are linear, the point of life is progression and/or accomplishment, the natural world exists to be conquered and understood by man), as does circumnavigating a mountain (experiences are circular, the point of life is to learn through that circularity, things don't really massively change, but sustainability is possible, and natural world is a cycle or series of cycles that inescapably includes humans, etc.).
If you've read this far, you might see where I'm going with this.
If not, here goes: it popped into my head today, at the peak (get it?) of my existential crisis about whether or not I should be spending weeks rereading old books, that the circumnavigation metaphor applies here, too. That is, returning to texts after ten years can't be a waste of time and is, in fact, almost mandatory because of how much I've changed since then (since the last "circle," if you want to beat the horse to death). Of course there's more to learn. And skipping past these texts because I've been there once before would actually be against the basic spirit of the thing I'm reading them to be able to write (an argument for circularity and sustainability).
Whew. So, I'm sure that wasn't as fun for you as it was for me, but thanks for reading this far if you did. Expect more of these in the future as my brain slowly grows/dies from reading THE TOMES.
In the meantime, here's some music from today's reading session. If, by some weird chance, you're a fan of Outer Wilds, there might be some thematic overlaps here with what I was just writing about. Otherwise, it's just a nice song you can enjoy.
youtube
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freshairforrabbits · 1 year
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Yayy!!! I've been waiting for a stuff like this!!
🍑🍋 for Quaritch (in any AU, I guess) and 🎂 for 'you circled me' Spider.
Thank you so much for these!!
Putting it under the cut like the others since it has the typical Southern Gothic AU themes of implied abuse, rape, and incest:
🍑 [PEACH] How do they show their kindness? How kind are they truly?
Gonna do Circled Me!Quaritch for these ones because fuck it he's super OCifyed there, like I'm fully aware i could clean that AU up and make an actual book, and i might one day-- who knows 😳. But fuck, I think there are actually a lot of ways he shows his kindness, like true kindness, the sort of warmth and safety a kid is supposed to have because the worst part of abuse (any kind of abuse) is when it's within the family, when it's coupled with moments like Dad letting you have a cold soda, or buying you some stupid game or a cool shirt, or some nicer shoes even if you don't really have the money. I think Quaritch, for as much as he isn't physically affectionate in that verse in a way that's good, he has moments where he would pull Spider in close and tell him he was proud of him. Of course, he never says he loves him-- but he'll laugh with him, playfully shove him, chase him around when Spider was little and play pretend even. He'd put him up on his shoulders in a crowd, he'd buy him some candy that Spider pointed out, hell, even Spider's name-- it's a nickname that comes from the other kids, and while his dad calls him Miles most of the time, he's also completely aware Spider is his son's name as well. But, at the end of the day, those moments of kindness never ever outweigh the pain and hurt, he's an asshole, he's cruel, he's mean, he's egotistical and self-serving and only sacrifical when it makes him look good. And he knows how to be a charming suck-up, he knows being kind means he might get things, so he weaponizes that Southern Hospitality. I think even with Paz he was never truly kind in a way that was ever gonna work out for them, and now he thinks kindness means keeping his son under his thumb in every way possible. Keeping him safe from the big bad world and teaching him about the way things have to be, what's kinder than someone telling you what to do, how to feel, how to live and think?
🍋 [LEMON] What is their kryptonite/ultimate weakness?
God, this is a tough one to think of maybe because it is as simple as Spider? But also, it's not just that simple. I think his ultimate weakness is he genuinely believes he's some kind of savior (a la Negan from the Walking Dead style) that what he's doing is Fixing his small little world. That he can fix this new and improved and younger Jake, he can save him from making the same mistakes as his asshole brother, he just needs to get with the program and boy does rJake do just that. In fact he fucking excels, and Spider, well he's reaching an age where he doesn't need his daddy so much anymore-- he's getting older, soon enough he'll be going away to college if he manages to get the scholarships and grants for it. But Spider is everything Quaritch needs to keep living, if Spider goes away, Jake isn't enough to alleviate the guilt and the impulses and all that shit cooked in his head about how much he Wants to mean to his son. And if that means becoming God, Daddy the Deranged, then that's what he'll do. His weakness is the fact he can't fucking live without someone to worship the ground he walks on, so he's gonna do anything to get that.
🎂 [BIRTHDAY CAKE] How does your OC celebrate their birthday? With who, and where?
I think Spider's birthdays were relatively normal prior to everything! Nothing to write home about, only getting a bit weird when Jake joined the picture just because suddenly it wasn't him and his dad celebrating alone. I'm thinking for Spider birthdays were like any other day, and his dad might not even do more than pick up a cake from the store, one of the discounted ones with someone else's name on it that they'd both laugh and joke about. But after that fateful farm trip at fourteen, birthdays are gonna look a little different 😼 and Spider's gonna suddenly be terrified of them, not that he wasn't overjoyed about them before (especially when his dad would act a bit weird about how many candles he'd have to put on the cake, how he'd bring up how big Spider's getting and then seem to treat him like he was just a little boy still, like he didn't want him to grow up at all, and unfortunately Paz died soon after Spider was born so while Spider's birthday isn't exactly a death day anniversary, it's still a reminder. Things still get tense and the days following his dad would smoke more, snap easier, and get pissed about little shit even though they were chummy just a week before. Because nothing is stable in Spider's life and he's been through the gauntlet of abuse even before things turned sexual). BUT fuck birthdays after that, if Spider gets to his fifteenth with Quaritch and Jake still around (only time will tell when I finally get around to writing part 2 of circled me 😈), he'll be having a bad time with frosting and icing like a repeat of that one incident with Jake only every card is on the table, and he'll never be able to look at blue icing or birthday candles the same way ever again.
In an ideal world, in ones Spider's imagined in daydreams to escape his own reality even from a young age, he has his birthday with other people, friends, his cousins further north, with Kiri, Lo'ak, Neteyam, and the rest (even his mom who he can't help imaging her being there alive and whole and warm and safe), at his grandparents farm where every memory there was always so cozy and safe, even with the scarier bits at the time-- where he was more visible and his dad couldn't be such a dickhead to him, and they didn't fight and scream at each other so much. Where everyone was around the table, the lights dimmed, the candles casting their glow and he was smiling enough to make his cheeks hurt, and there were presents and games and other family rituals and customs he didn't grow up with but always wanted. But now those daydreams are drenched in terror and the farm will never feel safe again.
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lovee-infected · 4 years
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Hello!! Can I request headcanons about gn mc who got sick (with fever or something to the point they can't go to school) and the twst boys decided to visit and take care of them? I've always enjoyed your headcanon! Thank you!!
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Riddle Rosehearts
He's got much of a weak immune system himself so he's usually prepared for unexpected situations like this. He knows what to do.
Just lay back against your pillow, do exactly as he says and you'll return to full health in no time
He'd probably be really angry if he finds you out of bed without his permission or spending too much time over your phone and reading books; he insists on you resting and much as possible.
He agrees on being possibly a -bit- over protective but he doesn't mind. If this will do any good at your healing process then he's more than okay with it.
Whenever you tell him to stop over stressing himself because of you he just goes: " Me ? Over stressing? Of course not! If you wish me to be calmer than I already am, then stop playing around and rest well till you get better."
He truly does work his hardest for you while you need him, from takings notes of what has been teached during your absence to spending at least 2 hours a day with you, making sure that nothing goes wrong.
As the strict leader of Heartslabyul, he usually spends most of the day watching over students and checking whether they are doing good at school and exams or not, but for now he cuts back on these responsibilities to take care of you. He may not shout that out loudly, but he always puts you before any other responsibilities he might have. Perhaps he enjoys spending time with you just as much as he enjoys having fresh strawberry tarts.
Trey Clover
You were still trying to catch up with the classes but Trey just knew that it'd be too much. It was him who made you forget about the school and instead, rest in your room.
You are a bit stressed out about not being able to take care of your chores, but thankfully he is there for you. He isn't known as heartslabyul's mother for no reason, make sure that he knows how to caress and pamper you better than anyone else.
Aside checking on you every day and bringing you additional medicines and food, he makes sure to collect notes of everything that is teached during your apsence so you won't have problems catching up with the studies afterwards . No need to mention that his cooking on the other hand is stunning, 5 star chef Trey at your service.
He understands that it might be a bit boring laying down in bed without anyone to talk to, so he often comes to you as you need someone to talk to and also brings you your favorite books to read so you won't get any bored when he can't be there.
He never says a word to make you feel any bad or frustrating about being nursed by him, instead he knows how to motivate you to get better even sooner: " Nursing you is absolutely adorable, but I don't want my dear (y/n) stuck in a bed all day while I'm willing to show you way more exciting things than a just couple of books,"
Cater Diamond
Clones, clones and clones :Time to get to work! The best part with it is that he can always make sure to have at least one of his clones watching over you even if he's busy with school or stuff, not that he lets you know what he's doing though.
You wonder why Cater's staying with you 24/7, as a third year student, isn't he supposed to be like, really busy with studying? Cater assures you that there's nothing to worry about, and it seriously isn't. He can always catch up with everything even his actual self stays all night at yours.
While his use of clones might seem a bit tricky, he still makes sure to provide you with anything you as long as you're sick need and even more: Bringing you roses and chibi, stuffed animals as gifts, along with sweet chill chats whenever you're awake, sending you soft love quotes with a bunches of colorful hearts and kisses via text even as he's right beside you, He enjoys how you'll need to look up your messages to see what he texts you allthough he's sitting just a few meters away from you. Aw, the way you blush whenever youlok at your phone, how cute~
Ace Trappola
What's the purpose of going to school when he does not understand a single word of it while his mind is all stuck on you? What are doing now? Are you fine? Does your chest Still hurt? Has your pain gotten any worse? Is there someone with you right now? What if you need help??
He's about to lose his mind, he tries asking someone free to check on you but there doesn't seem to be such a person available at the moment. 'That's it , I'll go on my own'
With the help of the year gang ( Jack, Deuce and Epel) he fakes breaking his leg during a PE session and yeets off the school for an entire week. YES!
He is moving to your place for a couple of days and Deuce will cover up for him whenever someone asks where Ace is.
Ace just knows that you're sick, he isn't sure of the exact name or type of your illness. On his way to yours, he fills a bag with anything he finds at Heartslabyul's cabinets with any title as -medicine- for you. He'll later look for the right one you need between them.
When you get to look into what he has brought, you aren't sure if he's kidding or not and when you ask, Ace realizes that he's really goofed up: what he actually brought was nothing else than animal medicines, and he he literally brought you each and every of them existing in Heartslabyul; how come didn't he see the pets/only label-??
You're lucky that you already have your medicines prepared, so you tell him not to worry about it. He feels so damn embarrassed wanting to melt into earth right now, but you have to admit he really lifted up your mood. You're happy to have your cute, Crabby-haired idiot besides you while you're sick, and he tries his best to help you with cooking and making sure of you taking your right medicines on time to make up for the mess he made on his first day:" Ehehe...at least...you can use some of them when Grim gets sick, right ?"
Deuce Spade
He really wants to stay there taking care of you but... he has to go to school as well. He has to get much higher grades this semester if he doesn't want to have to spend another year as a first year.
He can't skip any of classes, but promises to spend the rest of his day after school.
He rushes with his school uniform still on to your place, not wanting to be even a second late . He has to carry some casual clothes along with his books since he wants to stay over nights if you need him.
Due to get getting in trouble a lot back at the time, he's rather educated in medical field so he knows much and less of what he'll need to do as you're sick?
His cooking isn't something he can rely on so he goes to Trey, telling that he needs some soup for Ace since he seems to be looking a bit sick lately?
He prepares your food, brings you warm towels, repeatedly checks your body temperature and when you're finally asleep, gets to his own studies. He ends up Having fewer than 3 hours of night sleep multiplr times and once, he didn't get any sleep at all.
He tries his hardest to look his best in front of you so you won't notice how terrible he actually is; when you question the bags under his eyes, he claims them to be left from the mascara which a couple of guys put on him a few days ago for fun and consistently laughs. Damn, this boy doesn't even know how to lie huh? He is literally dying, but he won't tell you a word. He can handle worse...
When you finally return to full health you realize how terrible he's been doing lately and you take rule of his nurse this time. Making sure that your cinnamon roll would finally get some sleep.
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Leona Kingscholar
"My room, now". You look way too terrible to be able to make it to the classes therefore he has to make sure that you won't do anything stupid while you need to be taking some rest.
Bringing you to his own room wasn't his main intention since he just wanted to keep an eye on you but couldn't afford to visit you everyday if you didn't live any close to him so, easiest solution to the problem would be you staying with him.
He lets you use his bed but keeps on reminding you that it's just because you're sick so you better not be expecting such things to ever happen again. He would fall asleep in less than a minute at whatever he lays his head on, so sleeping on the ground isn't as hard as it seems. He just had to make sure that you would't step on him or his tail when you walk out of the bed.
He can ask Ruggie to nurse you and all, but decides to do most of your stuff on his own because it'd be a lot worse if Ruggie too gets sick. Sharing the same room with you has already put him on a pretty high infection risk so, that wouldn't really matter if he's the one nursing you or not. He doesn't really mind getting sick either, a free chance to take some days off school and chill; why not ?
He turns out to be pretty good with board games and there's no need to worry about getting bored while you can go for 100+ chess matches with Leona winning you each and every time; a bit ironic, but entertraining nonetheless.
He's actually really enjoying spending time with you, but isn't really expressing it. The only time when he actually shows some direct affection is when he plants secret kisses on your forehead as you're asleep.
Ruggie Bucchi
He has grown up in an awfully poor family with multiple siblings, so he's pretty familiar to the pain of seeing those you hold dear sick .He has turned into a not only responsible but also supportive boy toward friends and family, so you can make sure that he can take the best care of you while you're sick.
Perhaps his only problem is...Leona. He'd need Ruggie around even during school time and the hyena boy can't even have a full 30 minutes away from him which makes it impossible for Ruggie to take his time checking on you at least once a day.
Well, he has to find a way to babysit both of you at the same time so, -Let's take you to his own room-
Great ! He no longer needs to worry now that he can take care of you both. Leona too agrees on you staying at his as long as you don't cause any trouble.
Poor Ruggie has to sleep on the floor but assure you that he rarely gets to be the one sleeping on bed back in the home so, he is kinda used to sleeping on the cold ground.
He knows how to cook? Much and and less of it but who cares? He just asks you what you want and returns with it in 30 minutes; guess why: Because he'd just borrow the food from someone else. He doesn't mind his dirty ways indeed, you're sick so, you're more important than some dude wanting to chill on his food during lunchtime.
He just takes a list of medicines you may need and returns with all of them in his bag. He has to come at the right time on his own every time you have to take any of them since you'd most likely either fall asleep or forget to take them on time.
Enjoy your time with him, because it's gonna be a real luxury. He'd treat you nothing less than the way he treats Leona as he's sick so, you may consider yourself a part of a royal family at his service.
Jack Howl
Fluffy tsundere wolf is ready to give up on all he's got for you, what on earth might be sweeter than this ?
The moment, no, the second he realizes that you're not feeling well, Jack would immediately take you to the nurse office to see if you're. It's such a relief that it isn't thst serious, all you need to do is to take some rest.
Meanwhile you're resting in bed, he'll do the shopping and asks the kitchen for some soup ( You're sick you can't have too salty or sweet foods like normal cafeteria meals ) He gives up on his own meal to get some for you instead, it's just hunger of course he can handle it.
He feeds you and makes sure that you'll finish your entire meal, reminds you to take your medicines on time, brings you your favorite books to read and, most importantly, listens to... anything you'd ask him for.
He hardly ever lets anyone touch his ears or tail but if it's you, why not? You even fall asleep hugging his tail like a doll and he just patiently waits for you to wake up, blushing as he appreciates how cute you look while asleep.
Damn he has to keep the distance otherwise he as well would end up being sick but, it just seems impossible to say no when you ask for cuddles.
Jack tells you stories of his home town and national legends making your mouth drop in fascination. His stories seem to amaze him just as they amaze you and it makes him unbelievably happy to see you liking things he's been appreciating all over his life.
He even gets to the point of talking about his will to become all mighty and strong just like the magicians he looks up to, especially Leona. Just watching his strength gives you the will to overcome your illness and be at least a bit like Jack; he's really great, isn't he?
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Azul Ashengrotto
No no no- Unacceptable! You shouldn't be sick, you shouldn't -get- sick- He told you to watch what you eat and what you wear as it's raining out there - HE TOLD YOU A MILLION TIMES- But now what? You are sick.
Azul panicks, he keeps on exaggerating the whole thing even if it's just a normal cold. He just isn't the type to easily deal with sicknesses. Whenever he catches a cold, it'll take him weeks to return to full health due to how weak his body is and, he's so worried about you being the same.
Soup, warm water bath, Medicines , magic potions to reduce the fever, ultimate revival spells... he showers you in all of them. Even if the virus won't kill you Azul's overprotection will most likely do, and he'll get really mad if you tell him that he's exaggerating it.
When you regain half of your full health, you ask him to let you return to school and- He immediately pits you back in bed: "No leavings, not until you're done with this troublesome fever or whatever."
You feel like an adult forced to stay in a cradle and wear diapers meanwhile Azul thinks that you're too naive to take your health seriously.
When you finally manage to pull him over, you realize how sick and pale he's gotten since you got sick. The bags under his eyes proved that he hasn't been getting much of sleep recently. "God what have you done to yourself-"
You finally tell him that he's the one who needs help , not you. You plant a kiss on his cheek and force his head to your lap, wanting him to get some sleep. He slowly understands that he might've been taking it a bit too seriously, but since you are fine now, he's kinda glad that he took it hard on you. He just wants you to be safe and sound; even if his it's going to cost his own health on the first placd.
Jade Leech
Humans get sick? It's pretty rare of aquatic creatures, especially eels to get sick so Jade's pretty new to this . 'wow , pathetic , aren't humans?' he thinks . Well anyway he can't just stand back and make fun humans while you seem to be in serious pain, but what can he do? He still has a lot to learn about human life and it's his first time having one of them sick, oh man.
Well, they tell that you should get some...rest ? Well maybe he should take you to bed. First step done , let's go for the rest. He blocks several of his classmates in the corners asking for... information. He simply takes notes . Possibly useful medicines and meals, hours of sleeping, allowed activities, useful tips, warnings, etc.
He has to read the list several times to make sure that he's got it all right. Let's nurse (y/n).
He unexpectedly goes from 0 to 100 like bam- bye eel boy hello nurse Leech. He'll turn your room into a hospital room, a good one though, filled with dolls and flowers and anything he was told to add because they send away positive vibes.
His cooking on the other hand is amazing. He'll look for several light meals for sick bodies but- chooses those which match your tastes . You can't help but to love everything he cooks . Chef's kiss.
He changes your bed pillow and cloths everyday, returning with washed, silky pillows and covers . A warm, smooth bed is what you need for a good sleep.
If there was such a status he would've been the god of nursing; wow you would've needed pay him off a lot for his service if he wasn't giving it all to his darling for free.
When you finally regain your health, he just has one more question left to ask before leading you to your daily classes: "Now now dear, would you mind rating me , and my nursing service?"
seem like he's really curious to see whether he's done it correctly or not.
Floyd Leech
Things seem so uncool when you're not as energetic as always , pale skin as if you're choking on lack of oxygen and bizarreness in your movements like a doll, smh, so boring.
Just like Jade, he's pretty new to surface life and watching you bear with illness looks pretty weird in his eyes?
When Jade, finally, informs him on what exactly happens to human body while struggling with an illness and what he must do to you to get rid of this annoying mode, he understands. Floyd still finds human's body shitty for how weak it is but decides to use Jade's words as a guide to deal with you.
A warm bed, fluffy pillows and stuffed animals, these seemed to be enough for step one: Enough of rest and sleep. He can't blame you on this one though, sleeping is always amazing. Something that never gets boring. Everything seems to be pretty fine to begin with, sadly it won't last any longer than a few hours-
He's told to bring you food, but when he returns with 4 bags filled with chocolate, candy, soda and chips; it's obvious that he didn't get the point correctly. Jade explains that your body is still way to weak for too salty or sweet foods, even highly cooked meals would worsen your immune system and make it take much longer to be healed.
Floyd goes for a second pick up and this time: this time returns with raw potatoes and frozen meat- Raw potatoes and frozen meat-. Well, he just followed everything Jade told him...? Neither too salty nor to sweet, and raw because Jade told him not to bring over-cooked stuff. Even if the virus did you no harm you would've probably died under his food selections if Jade wasn't there to stop him...
While his food choices might be horrible, Floyd's still one of the best mutuals you can have close when you aren't feeling well. With him beside you, giggling and chuckling as he rambles on how boring his day was, you've got to admit that you'd rarely feel sick when he's around. Although you're sick at the moment, nothing seems to have changed between the two of you, he enjoys spending time with you now just as much as he enjoys it when you're all safe and sound.
Well...maybe he can't be the best nurse you'd get to have , but one thing's for sure: No one can ever make you laugh like he does and, you know what say: Laughter is the best medicine~
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Kalim al asim
He can't be any more worried, he stresses out whenver a friend is sick and now, it's not just a friend, it's -you-, one of the dearest and closest ones Kalim had ever had; just how can he keep calm ???
He is being raised under severe health protection and hardly ever catches even a simple cold, several people had taught him strict health routines and he had to follow them all over his life, so he is considerably familiar with ways of overcoming and illness , and that's what he's here for!
Jamil forbids him from cooking since it's too dangerous if he needs to use any knifes, but that wouldn't hold him back from finding enormous food recipes based on your favorite condiments to make your meal more pleasant.
He makes sure to prepare anything you need in a matter of seconds, golden peacock or 5000 camels, doesn't matter ! He's got way more than enough and what use would be better than giving them to you?
He can take care of you on his own, but Jamil insists on Kalim leaving it all to him and stay away from you as much as possible (No need to mention the high risk of infection for Kalim since he's almost sticking to you all the time)
Jamil as well would caress you meanwhile you rest at Scarabia (Right, Kalim proudly brought you there ) and Kalim, makes sure to stay close to you as much as he can, mostly when Jamil isn't around to tell him off- He doesn't want to put Jamil in more trouble but, you are his first priority.
You're bound to your bed, but just having Kalim around brings way more fascinating adventures than what you might get to see out there. His stories really do show you to a whole new world and takes the pain in your lungs and chest way further that your mind could catch . Perhaps Kalim is he one and only who can make your mind fly, even as your body's laying lifelessly in bed.
Jamil Viper
For the first time, someone stressed him out more than Kalim always does. He's always expecting to be scared to death because of him, but because of you? Damn he didn't see this coming.
Depending on what your illness is, he manages to freak out even more or clam himself down to his sane self, but the main point is how he's got to serve you all the best until you're totally safe.
He soon prepares any kind of medicine and chemical you may need and you have to use them all properly, don't even think of rejecting any single one of them otherwise Jamil would force feed you: "Don't be such a baby, you won't get any better unless you have these"
Just like Azul, he might be a bit overprotective with your health since he doesn't even let you leave the bed for more than a few minutes. He insists on you avoiding any sort of activities that may be tiring or heavy to your body.
To be honest, the thought of using his snake whisper on you when you don't behave or ask him to stop being so strict over a simple illness crosses his mind. Luckily, he refuses to use it. You're still his lover that'd be too heartless of him to take advantage of you like this just because you can't see how much he loves you.
He needs to keep the distance, but has to admit that it can be really hard to avoid hugging and kissing all over your face when you're gazing at him with that sweet smile.
Having you close makes Jamil realize how affectionate he actually is: How much he misses the healthy and happy you who he was never in a danger. Well maybe this nursing days gives him a lesson to at least try to have some sweeter time with you while you are all safe and sound - and not tiredly laying in your bed.
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Vil Schoenheit
You can consider yourself nothing less than a Prince/ Princess when Vil of all people is caressing you. Your body is still way too weak to have control of anything going on in your life at the moment, and that's how Vil takes control over all of them- all in your life. Which means that you now have to live and do as he wishes.
He will take no effort in turning you into one of the fairest of all students in school (Not that you'll ever reach him though) as long as he can have his eyes over you. His rules are way more than just -beauty- ; just as he can be the all fair and powerful Queen who steps on you, he knows how to play the role of the nurse like a Queen would do~
A royal maiden is only to serve the royal family, so it's time to show how much of a princess /prince you can be in bed. You don't need to worry about your medicines or meals since Vil's always organized and on time with them, not to mention that his cooking too seems to be pretty good. He uses light yet, nutritious recipes that you'd enjoy and you're really surprised because these kinds food don't really look tasty.
Perhaps he just needed an excuse all this time to get this close to you, so he can take care of anything he's been dreaming to do with you all this time. Pedicure and manicure, trying on new fruit masks, resting face and body muscles to have a smoother, cleaner skin, etc.
Your room is a beauty salon at this point and you usually forget that you're actually sick.
He works on not only your physical beauty but also your manners, he doesn't care if you're sick or not . It's the best time to take away your poor manners and habits.
Well the scary Queen has got his own soft spots too; while indirectly giving you beauty lessons, he enjoys teasing you as you sometimes look pretty naive and new to all dos and don'ts of a high-level life like his, and he's more than pleased to teach you: "Pull yourself together , potato."
Rook Hunt
He isn't really into the whole nursing game but- If it's an opportunity to stalk caress and admire you all night, why not?
He is lowkey familiar with the basics so, it isn't supposed to be that difficult to handle . Finding pills and medicines isn't hard either since they can all be found at mister S's shop. ( He would've liked it better if he had to get them from a moster or something, anything more adventurous)
Though he doesn't really like quiet and safe journeys he'd actually appreciate it if it's with you. And of course, he won't let anyone else take advantage. Let it just be with the two of you and all~
He isn't about to hurt or scare you in any sort way; it's true that he just loves it when things get a bit dangerous but, he knows how to manage excitement as well. You want him to be a soft gentleman? Then that's what he's going to be.
Rook would be the softest Rook you could've ever imagined when he plays the nurse. It can't even be called nursing: It's about a passionate lover spending all his time with his darling who isn't feeling well. Even his expressions are taken to a totally different level, the mysterious smile he always puts on is replaced with a worried and, mildly sad gaze that makes your heart melt.
Might sound too dramatic bug he may even sing you to sleep. Sweetest words ever dancing to the rhythm of his unique accent that make your cheeks hurt at trying not to blush. This isn't the only drama he's up to though, even his normal speaking often ends up with your mind drowning in feelings. He won't bother giving you soft kisses on hand and forehead when you don't expect it. He likes surprising you, even if it's in a romantic way.
And...the real Rook, is only out when you're asleep. Sitting on a chair just a few inches away from your bed, a pair of eyes carefully follow the pace of your chest as it rises and falls. He's never tired, a huntsman gets no sleep as long as his prey's close by. Wow, if sweetness is all he needed to approach you, then he should give it a try more often~
Epel Felmier
His first reaction to hearing of you being sick is summarised in :Gasping, Blushing, Questioning, Sad puppy eyes. "It's just a simple fever...right? (Y/n) will soon be better..." , Epel confronts himself. He isn't getting overly emotional, but when it comes to you, he does have a sensitive spot.
At first, it is his anxiety over your health that makes him want to come over to your house to check up on you everyday but , it soon ends up being more serious. What if this is an opportunity to prove his reliability? You'd finally get to see how much of a strong and helpful man he can be. Even as he looks soft.
While Epel's trying his hardesr to seem a tough as possible, you can't help but to adore his cuteness as he is doing his best while you're sick. He bakes you the best of apple pies you've ever had and you have to admit; being sick can't hold you back from enjoying the sweet taste of fresh, caramelized baked apples melting in your mouth.
Growing up to be a country boy, he never really relied on chemicals as a useful cure to any illnesses. He's more into organic ways of helping human body into regaining its lost energy, which can be put as : 1) Healthy food 2) Enough of sleep and rest 3) Lifted up spirits and enough of humor. He'd be really protective over the last option, he wants to make sure that your self-esteem and spirits would be way better than ever
He has to keep the distance, but some small cuddles would not hurt, right? Perhaps some small forehead kisses before bedtime too. He's still pretty uncomfortable with kisses but, since you're sick...that can be counted as an exception.
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Idia Shroud
He's been away from humanity for too long; long enough to almost forget that humans get sick. Robots sometimes have their codings crashed or their gears damaged, that's when they'll need an engineer to repair them . How did the cure system work with humans?? He can't really remember. Due to spending time with almost nobody except Ortho (who happens to be a robot) and hardly ever leaving his room and as the result, barely getting sick, Idia is pretty new to human body's metabolism; he isn't sure of what he might be able to do for you. But, humans have something called...immune system, right? Ah something that heals body on its own. Well maybe relying on that would be enough.
He decides to give you some far distance support instead of comimg all way down to your dorm . He can't be any more happier of technology's existence for such cases. Your immune system can heal you on its own, all he've got to do is to send some motivation your way. The summary of most of his extremely motivational texts would be : "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger! Keep it up (y/n)!!👊✨💥" and when you reply telling him how terrible you're feeling he'd just try to look for strongers sentences-
He repeatedly mistakes humans and robots and accidently texts you:" why don't you get someone to repair you?" several times. Then goes to bang his head against the wall realizing how dumb he's acting.
When you get worse he gives up. Maybe those sentences wasn't enough of motivation . Idia really does want to come visit you in person but he seems to be bound to his area. Well at least, Ortho isn't, right? He comes up with a way better idea to program Ortho to take care of you while Idia can't do it himself. He copied hundreds of anatomy, human biology and medicine to Ortho's data list. Well that seems to be enough. He can now cook, wash clothes, brings you your medicines and most importantly, remain by your side all the time as you may need help. Idia puts s small camera on Ortho so he'd be able to watch what's going on as long as you need Ortho's his help. He feels quite guilty for not showing up on his own but- maybe it's just better this way. Coming in person would do no good but him freaking out at not knowing what to do which would end up in making you feel worse. Long distance watch as he controls Ortho around is way better, even if he has to keep his eyes on tablet 24/7. He cuts back on his sleeping to make sure that nothing would go wrong. Even long distance watch seems to be stressful at this point...
He does care about you, a lot, but right now, he's no prepared to show physical affection. Let him show his love through his very own ways, he's just taking baby steps with you <3
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Malleus Draconia
"Now now little one, don't give in so easealy. I know you're stronger than this..." Malleus motivates you. You certainly aren't going to die just because of a simple fever but still, wow. Humans -are- truly weak and fragile. He shouldn't really be caring for a mortal being especially if it's a human, but you are an 'exception'; you always are.
He could just leave you to Lilia and Sebek and you would've been under their watch and care 24/7, but he prefers to do this on his own since you are his favorite creature. He doesn't mind seeing how you'd overcome the pain even if it's with a simple cold. He wants to get more of you and your expressions.
He doesn't really have much to do, magic can do it all. All it takes to turn your depressing room into a prince/princess's dreamy bedroom is a twist of a finger. Go on and tell him what you want , you shall have in within a second. "All the best for you, child of man~"
While his significant magic skills are all truly stunning and helpful, his presence on his own seems to be the best part of him nursing you. He is your tsunotarou, afterall~ Not the descendant of Mistress of all Evil but only when it comes to you.
Sometimes he'd make you wish you'd stay in bed forever and ever, all to have him here, by your side. Just to have his soft, slender fingers brushing against your cheek and playing with the tip of your hair.
He does talk, but most of the time being is spent in silence since he doesn't want to bother you if it's hard for you to talk. He may pretend to be busy with something else but it's just to take your mind over the fact that he's watching you all the time. His small gestures are just as sensual as his words. Kisses on forehead, locking his dragon eyes with you , brushing your soft hair with hand as you lay on his shoulder (not that he cares about keeping the distance although you're sick. Your human illnesses are way too weak to do any harm to him, anyway~ )
His favorite time of the day is when you're asleep. You're adorable and lovely all time but, your sleeping pose, it's unimaginably beautiful to him. Watching your calm face empty of any emotion followed by the calm, yet, organized pace in your breathing as your chest falls and rises. He barely gets any sleep during the night, he doesn't need it. Watching you is way more pleasing: "Sweet dreams, my precious little human~"
Lilia Vanrouge
The most experienced, dedicated nurse here. He's been raising many of baby faes and struggling with a young, fireball shooter baby Malleus over the years. Nursing a fragile ill human like you is no more than a warm-up for him.
Chill on your bed and let him take care of everything, from the warm towels to fluffy blankets and pillows. Smooth music playing in your room as you take short naps, plushies and teddy bears around your bed giving you feelings of a newborn baby sleeping in a warm and fancy bed.
That's not all, along with his professional nursing skills, having Lilia himself around would take it all to a whole new level. He is so full of contrasts; Young and old, quite and wild, wise and careless, serious and silly and probably hundreds of other adjectives you can name.
Where else would you find a nurse who'd play you your favorite rock tracks on his guitar in the afternoon while at night, brings you cookies and hot milk to have while listening to his old but -gold- stories before going to sleep?
Lilia has got it all, old, new, calm, wild, and perhaps that's how it's never boring when he's the one you are spending time with. 'Sickness with benefits' to call. But, don't forget his horrible cooking skills.
Better hide some canned food under your pillow to save yourself from starvation when he's not around, refuse to eat his food st any cost (otherwise you'll need another 2 week hospitalized because of food poisoning-)
Make sure to thank your adorable bat nurse when you're back to full health; even if your stomach's still in pain because of his nasty cooking.
Silver
It's...his first time taking care pf someone. He is neither experienced nor educated when it comes to human health... especially because of how he's been living with fairies (who barely get sick) all over his life. The only reliable source for him would be his own memories; how Lilia used to take care fo him when he was a child. There isn't much he can remember but that'd do
Nursing doesn't seem to be that hard when he actually gives it a try - Mostly about you sleeping all day. Wow if sleeping this much is considered to be a symptom of being sick, then Silver himself has to be sick as hell 24/7. He isn't really sure if that's concerning or not
He is doing good since he seems go be pretty responsible and calm toward the whole thing, but don't expect him to be on time.
Silver wants to make sure that you'll take your medicines on time but he often fails to. He oversleeps most of the time and when he's up, he'd panic knowing that you missed your hourly medicine again.
He'd lowkey feel frustrated and useless when he misses stuff because of his sleeping issues, especially when it comes to you. He have to go for a stronger method so, he ends up in using 7 different clocks and alarms to make sure that he won't miss anything anymore; you're sick. He has to do all his best to take care of you. Nobody matters more than you do. Alarm clocks he uses are freaking loud and give him a heart attack whenever he uses them to wake up. Poor guy would need a long sleep when you're better.
He often falls asleep next to your bed after making sure that you are having a peaceful night sleep. He places a goodnight kiss on your forehead lays his head at the bottom of your bed. Who knows, maybe he would dream of you tonight, again.
Sebek Zigvolt
There's no way that you'd ever come close to master Malleus but- he still cares for you, a lot. Perhaps as much as he cares for Malleus although he refuses to confess to it. He is trained and skilled for all possible emergencies so he's all prepared to take the best possible care of you and make sure that you'll return to full health in no time.
He just knows what he is doing and makes sure that things would run smoothly. He is keeping each and every aspect in consideration and can organize everything like no one else can. From your sleeping schedule to light exercises required as you're sick. He insists on you starting to develop a better life style so that you won't end up in bed and lose time like this.
It's nice to have someone keeping the balance of your life when you need it, but when it's Sebek we're talking about, know that he might go a bit -too far- with it. He'd be overly protective and strict while you need a considerable deal of sympathy and softness too since you're sick - He collects notes of everything that was teached while you were sick and brings them to you to study, telling you that it'd be impossible to keep up with the rest of the lessons unless you study them right now, in your bed. And when you complain of it being hard to read and sit due to how weak your body is, he returns with the solution: Audio books (He isn't giving up... deal with it )
Studying isn't your only issue: he's being protective over each and every muscle you move. He'd wake you up early in the morning for a light, morning work out and doesn't let you out of the bed for the rest of the day. Whenever you complain, that's what his answer would be: " Master Lilia has blessed me with these , gloriously impressive lessons he's learned through experiences within his long- lasting life!! I believe in his words from the bottom and there's surely no cure greater than this if he says so" poor boy isn't considering he possibility of Lilia tricking him again at all.
This puppy means good, even if he fails to show it as great as you might be expecting him to. In fact he is just following all that he's told to, meanwhile he's pretty inexperienced and new to it. You may find it a bit unfair but, consider that he would've never gone out of his way to take care of you for plenty of hours everyday if it wasn't for you (Or Malleus-) seeing you sad on its own gives him wet puppy vibes let alone having you sick . He may act like a coward but, it's all because of how much you mean to him.
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claymotif · 2 years
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hiiiiii i would LOVE to hear more about the starless hour if you dont mind that premise sounds SO interesting
hellooooo ben my beloved thank u for asking <3 (under a cut bc i have more to say than i thought i did)
the short(ish) version of the worldbuilding is that magic is real and some ppl are born into families that have natural affinities for it (mages); if you're not born into a family of mages u can still try accessing magic thru witchcraft, but the two types of magic have different applications so neither one is treated as inherently better than the other.
(the long version of the worldbuilding goes into the different subtypes of each type of magic and how they're used etc etc)
so delwyn (the w is pronounced like a v. the reason is that i am annoying) grows up as a lightning mage*, and historically lightning mages have a not-so-great reputation, so a lot of delwyn's magical education is focused on self-control as opposed to fully utilizing the extent of his power. ergo he is pretty damn good at controlling his power, to the point where he teaches classes at a post-secondary school (essentially a trade school for magicians); the school is located in lower manhattan and it also organizes the patrol system that keeps the city safe from monsters**
(* not elaborated on for plot reasons)
(** so far the biggest threat i've invented is an approximation of a vampire, in that they drink/crave human blood, but these creatures are barely recognizable as having ever been human so)
so delwyn is on one of those patrols w/ his patrol partner, junhee, and they find chan; chan is a little bit lost (he has never been to nyc before) but he says he's a prophet, he's been looking for delwyn and that delwyn is destined to cause the apocalypse.
(this is the part where i get to start playing with some fun pov stuff; there's a simultaneous storyline happening where a blood witch named sasha, along w/their friends, is hunting delwyn to kill him precisely because he's supposed to cause the apocalypse. chan believes that delwyn has enough free will to change his fate, sasha believes that the only way to guarantee that delwyn is free from his destiny is to remove him entirely. etc etc)
most of the plot hinges on the adventures they get into with chan trying to steer delwyn away from the vision he had, with each step inadvertently bringing them closer to it, and also the occasional run-ins with sasha's crew where chan desperately tries to convince them not to commit a murder in an extremely public place in a city where murders happen on the regular lmao
(also because i know you saw my vague posts about it: junhee is a plant witch, but he also has an extremely rare ability to see the otherrealm, which is the plane of existence where magic sort of blankets ours. turns out magic is kind of creepy and does a lot of really fucked up things when u can see where the worlds blend. among other things it means that junhee knows that something terrible is inevitable but he is along for the ride anyway bc he's hopeless)
anyway the vibes of tsh are magic (obviously) and ideally rather dark since a) it's the end of days and b) it's new york. you understand. an idea i've also been throwing around is more prominent blood/gore/body horror mainly bc i read a book that did it and then i thought "i can do that better"
bonus notes:
the title is plot relevant :)
sasha knows about the apocalypse thx to their friend kei, who's a divination witch; divination witchcraft is a lot less precise than having an actual gift of prophecy, which is how chan is consistently able to stay one step ahead of them
there are also shifters, which are were-creatures whose transformations get exponentially faster each time they transform until they are essentially entirely monster since there's no humanity left
i am still working on fleshing out the group that uses magic for Evil, bc i like things complicated and i want more nuance than good vs. evil lol
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audreycritter · 4 years
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how do you balance creating fan works with juggling your responsibilities? I've been struggling with finding the time/motivation to write what I want.
First, my creativity output tends to come and go in waves. Some weeks I’m writing 1-3k a day, some weeks I don’t even open documents at all. Some weeks are in-between, where I open stuff and poke around and do a few hundred words here and there, but not much more. The “off” times I’m usually reading, playing games, watching movies or shows, talking to friends, and thinking about stories or scenes. Sometimes, this isn’t even anything I’ll ever write! Sometimes, I don’t think about stories I’m writing at all. It’s more whatever pops into my head and less structured.  Part of me wants to be Disciplined and write every day, but the reality is that unless it’s a very tiny limit like 100-200 words, this really isn’t doable for me. I have kids I homeschool, I have a house and a husband and a dog and there are times in life when I need to deep clean a bunch of rooms, or plan out school stuff, or go on hikes, and I still have to have time to recharge. Writing sometimes is that recharging, but I can’t afford to force it when it isn’t. 
Because the reality is that to find that time, you have to give up something. There isn’t a version of the equation where “finding time” involves creating more time than you already have. The things I can afford to cut out to work on writing are the things I do in my own entertainment time-- I write instead of doing those things at all, or as much. So, I tend to write when it’s the thing I want to do, and enjoy doing, because otherwise it would be an emotional and mental drain I couldn’t afford. When I’m writing a lot in a day, it means I’m not really reading fic or novels, I’m not watching much TV, I spend way less time chatting online, I don’t really scroll tumblr as much, I’m not playing video games. The things I usually do in the bit of time in the afternoons or evenings when I have a chance to just do something I want to do, that’s what I give up to make room. (Sometimes, I give up sleep, but I don’t recommend doing this often. I can’t say I fully regret the times when I’m on a roll and stay up super late, but this really isn’t healthy or sustainable long-term because I’m not in a position to sleep in late-- if you can afford to sleep in late, that might be different.) Two caveats: This is a fact, but not always a conscious decision. Sometimes, I might actually think, “Okay, so I’m not going to have time to watch this tonight after all,” but that’s pretty rare. Usually, if I’m giving up stuff to write, it’s just the natural consequence of really wanting to write and enjoying it and focusing on it. The same as if I’d gotten sucked into a really good book and spent the evening/night reading-- I’m not consciously deciding “I will give up other entertainment options for this today,” as much as I’m just doing the thing I want to do. The second caveat is that I have ADHD! Wanting to write and getting started can be two different things because of my difficulty switching tasks or starting a task. The rule that tends to help me the most are on the days I want to write, or think I want to write, and have stuff I’ve been thinking about writing, but keep not getting started, I give myself ten minutes alone with an open document. A timer, ten minutes, the document, and nothing else. No app switching, no scrolling, no background chores. Those ten minutes of boredom don’t always kickstart writing, but they give me the chance to determine if writing is the thing I actually want to do that day. I get going and I’m on a roll and I ignore the timer when it goes off, or I poke around, maybe write a few words, and the timer beeps and I’m free to go do something else because it’s not a good writing day. 
I’m not always the best at balancing, to be honest. Sometimes, I give up sleep, or put off minor chores. Sometimes, I forget to eat. I do not recommend these, but I think it’s okay if you’re WORKING at balancing and sometimes realize you’ve made an error, as long as you scramble to catch up and give yourself some space to learn. Because my responsibilities are centered around tiny humans, I have a framework of school and meal times I can’t ignore; if your responsibilities are more “quiet” and easier to overlook (like homework, or self-care, or work from home) you might need to just teach yourself to not even open documents until you’ve done certain tasks. Jot down notes if you’re afraid you’ll lose something! But don’t buy into the myth that a “real writer” is completely controlled by impulse and whim. Will there be rare days when you ignore everything else to write for four hours? Maybe! But that shouldn’t be the goal, or the norm, because unless you have a household staff and responsibilities that cater to your whims, it’s really not realistic or healthy. 
The big things are to figure out how to be hard on yourself and how to be gentle with yourself. If you’re too tired, really want to watch a show, overwhelmed by work, just need to talk to a friend or chat server for an hour, it’s okay to just do those things and not feel guilty. Unless you are writing fulltime as your job, it is a hobby and you don’t “have” to achieve a certain level of productivity to be valid as a writer. The times to be hard on yourself are when you know you want to write, and are enjoying the actual process, but your brain isn’t trained to focus on it for stretches of time-- when you’re writing and think of something to tell a friend, wander about a random fact, want to check tumblr when you pause to think about a sentence, that’s when you sternly tell yourself “no, give it thirty seconds before you jump away from this task” and see if you end up getting unstuck with that little breath of boredom space. If you’re really disengaging, that’s okay, but your brain might just need to build the muscle of staying focused on the structure of creative output. It’s a muscle! You might WANT to do fifty pushups, but if you haven’t made your body stick out five for a while, and then ten, and built up, it’s probably not going to cooperate and you’ll feel miserable and broken and useless if you just try to get to fifty the first time. But...building to fifty requires not getting distracted and wandering away when you’ve only done 2 of 5 the week you’re working on sets of five.  My only other recommendation if you haven’t done a lot of writing before is to not fall into the editing trap. Unless you just REALLY LOVE EDITING and it engages and charges you to write more, don’t get stuck in the loop of opening a document or a notebook to write and spending all your time editing the few paragraphs you already have. A lot of the first draft stuff will probably suck. That’s okay. Just finish the thing. You know the cake analogy in fandom? “Write that hurt/comfort, it’s just more cake!”? Getting stuck editing the first bit of a story over and over until it’s polished is sort of like looking at a bowl of three ingredients of a cake recipe and going “This doesn’t look much like cake, maybe if I add more flour...” until you have a bowl full of something that really isn’t cake and isn’t anything closer to cake, no matter how pretty you’ve made those three ingredients look in the bowl. Maybe it’s a very lovely color and has pretty sprinkles on it! Still not a cake. You’ve wasted your limited time, and worn yourself out, and you know you still don’t really have anything closer to a cake to pull out of the oven and show off. The time to edit is when the cake is done and cooling, and you’re making icing and picking out trimmings and cutting up fruit and shaving chocolate or whatever.  And then the next cake will probably be better because you practiced doing the whole thing and have a better idea of what to do and not do the next time. Then, opening a document or grabbing a pen and notebook can be a new, engaging chance to create instead of “oh it’s this same stale bowl of aesthetic half-batter.” (Again, if you find editing as you go super recharging, ignore this-- some people are just very good at tweaking batter as they go without stalling completely-- just give yourself the time to figure that out.)  I hope this helps! Feel free to send follow-up questions or clarifications if I misunderstood something or you want a differently structured answer or just MORE INFORMATIONS.
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bulkyphrase · 3 years
Text
Everybody & the Avengers Team
I've got a new fic rec list for you!
The stories in the "X & the Avengers Team" tags focus on one person's relationship to the Avengers team as a whole. Courtesy of AO3's tag browse and Excel, here's a ranked list of the top 20 most popular pairings:
Tony Stark | 2470 total, 240 OTP
Peter Parker | 2255 total, 85 OTP
Steve Rogers | 602 total, 56 OTP
Loki | 387 total, 26 OTP
Natasha Romanov | 308 total, 35 OTP
Clint Barton | 268 total, 46 OTP
Bruce Banner | 244 total, 15 OTP
Thor | 209 total, 7 OTP
Avengers Team | 174 total, 24 OTP
James "Bucky" Barnes | 156 total, 7 OTP
Wanda Maximoff | 143 total, 4 OTP
Phil Coulson | 105 total, 9 OTP
Darcy Lewis | 91 total, 6 OTP
Matt Murdock | 60 total, 8 OTP
Sam Wilson | 53 total, 5 OTP
Nick Fury | 41 total, 5 OTP
Harry Potter | 40 total, 0 OTP
Pepper Potts | 31 total, 1 OTP
Vision | 29 total, 2 OTP
Stiles Stilinski | 25 total, 0 OTP
In chart form, if you like charts:
Tumblr media
Notes:
The numbers after the names are the number of stories tagged with that ship. OTP means the number of stories where that is the only relationship tagged on the story. Numbers are accurate as of July 2021.
Story Recommendations
For your reading pleasure, included below is at least one fic rec for each pairing except the crossovers from non-Marvel fandoms (apologies to Mr. Potter & Mr. Stilinski). Most are gen fic, and even in the ones with a romantic pairing, romance is not the focus.
Tony Stark
As Subtle As Cognitive Recalibration by petroltogo (Teen, 8949) tumblr: @tonystarktogo
Standing inside his penthouse, listening to Rogers, Barton and Banner explain to Fury how they just happened to stumble over the Tesseract on a routine security check of Stark Tower’s roof and wouldn’t you know, they’ve managed to fight off the looming alien invasion before it could really start and secure the missing overpowered nightlight is one of the most surreal situations Tony has ever had the displeasure of experiencing.
Peter Parker
the worst field trip ever by shrill_fangirl_screaming (Teen, 3420) tumblr: @i-am-having-an-emotion
"We're on a field trip," Peter said. "To here. And Tony decided to be our tour guide and absolutely embarrass me, so can you please help get him under control?"
Which is how Peter Parker, architect of his own destruction, ended up with not one but two superhero pseudo-dads being annoying on his school field trip.
Steve Rogers
Do You Remember Being Happy? ('Cause I Sure Don't) by GalaxyThreads (Teen, 11022) tumblr: @galaxythreads
That seems about right. He doesn't know how he knows that, though. He does have vague memories of an annoyed fondness at finding peanut butter in some sort of jam. Thor's doing, because he doesn't see the point of using two knives when one works just as fine. He knows that. How does he know that? He knows all those little details, though, almost innately. How can he know these strangers so deeply?
Everyone else below the cut!
Loki
Proprietary by TheThirdMarauder (Teen, 7639)
No, Loki simply wants the Avengers conquered. The details of whom, how, and when matter not. Unless, of course, said details interfere with Loki's plans. Then, well, then none can fault him for protecting his own interests.
Loki has always been exceptionally good at lying to himself.
Natasha Romanov
What Girls Are Made Of by enigma731 (Teen, 4613) tumblr: @enigma731
She rolls her eyes but does as he’s indicated, using his shoulders to leverage herself up onto his back, her arms around his neck and her legs hugging his waist.
“You know,” he says blithely, “this isn’t really what I tend to picture when I think of a hot girl riding me.”
Natasha groans, deciding that if his sense of humor gets them arrested, she’ll kill him herself. “Just go.”
Clint Barton
Dear Clint Barton (circa age 7) by pollyrepeat (Teen, 4221)
With a normal person, this might count as blackmail material, but a) this is a case of mutually assured destruction if ever there was one, and b) Fury is immune to embarrassment. Not just in the regular, Tony Stark way, either, oh no. Things that could possibly end up being embarrassing to Fury get somehow warped and changed until they go from mortifying all the way over into useful and/or good for his image. It’s like a superpower.
Carrying Clint’s small child self around on his shoulders more than once has probably already hit the interagency rumour mill as an example of Fury’s innate awesomeness: good with rocket launchers and small children.
Also available as a podfic!
Bruce Banner
They're Not Wrong by Trumpeteer34 (Teen, 10163)
As Tony began to pace around the hole in the road to keep himself from shooting repulsors at the nearby buildings in a fit of rage, Thor began to study the nearby area. There was no sign of either the Hulk or Bruce Banner beyond the crater. The surrounding area, aside from the rubble of the fight, held no clue as to their friend’s location.
“Guys, he’s gone,” Tony growled into the communicator on their private line, drawing Thor out of his darkening thoughts. “Someone tranqed him and took him. He’s gone.”
Honorary mention goes to the Responsible Science series by @letteredlettered - the stories don’t have the "Avengers Team & Bruce Banner" tag, but they could, and they are amazing. The best Bruce Banner writing I've ever come across.
Thor
Fortunately, I Am Mighty by onward_came_the_meteors (General, 3062)
Steve was the first one to speak. “Are you okay?”
Thor nodded. Which was a bad idea, as it turned out, because now there were little gray lights flashing in front of his eyes. “I’m fine.” Absolutely everyone narrowed their eyes, and he added, “But, uh. Could we possibly not get back in the car just yet?”
Avengers Team
Civil Wasn't by onward_came_the_meteors (General, 7123)
"We're having an ideological conflict here," Tony stated with disbelief. "Are you telling me you still want to go out to dinner?"
"It's a standing engagement, Tony," Rhodey reminded him.
"Not you too—"
"We already had to reschedule from Friday when Natasha was..." Rhodey frowned. "What were you doing?"
The question was directed toward Natasha, who shrugged and said, "Spy stuff."
James "Bucky" Barnes
You Know How I Feel, aka, The Adventures of Bucky and Muffy the Dinosaur by ifeelbetter (Not Rated, 4511) tumblr: @ifeelbetterer
“As you may have heard, Bucky Barnes, a.k.a. The Winter Soldier, recently rescued a tiny part-robot dinosaur during the Avengers’ battle with Dr. Doom in Antarctica,” the other newscaster explained. “Pictures of Barnes and the dinosaur were posted on twitter by fellow Avenger, Clint Barton, a.k.a. Hawkeye, and immediately made Barnes’s new pet America’s sweetheart.”
“Her name’s Muffy,” said Steve."
Wanda Maximoff
and the woman was young again by Mira_Jade (General, 3669)
Tony Stark called them the Cap's Kooky Quintet, and sometimes the term amused her – causing her to lift a sardonic brow where someday a smile would truly smile. She enjoyed the presence of comrades – true comrades – and she enjoyed the way their minds wove and bound together about each other to fluctuate against her senses as one. There was something soothing about being in their midst, and even when their loud and brash ways – their painful Americaness - rubbed her raw and drained on her, it was ever the knitting of their minds that soothed those moments over, and made them inconsequential.
Phil Coulson
Coulson's First Day of School by storiesfortravellers (Teen, 3055)
Coulson looked up at him. “I like drawing pictures with Mr. Rogers. I like having tea parties with Ms. Potts. I like it when Dr. Banner reads me books, and I like it when Natasha teaches me things. And I like when you play with me. You do really good voices when we play action figures. And you’re the only one who lets me do stuff like jump off the high diving board at the pool or eat three cupcakes or play tackle with kids at the park.”
Clint didn’t realize that. He was pretty sure that meant that he was doing something wrong.
Darcy Lewis
Beginner Yoga for Dummies (Darcys) and Sad Hobos by chailover (Teen, 3434)
Darcy had a theory: crazy attracted crazy, working kind of like gravity. It was pretty much her explanation for her life after Thor. And if she had thought the type of crazy Thor attracted was bad, be it Loki or the Warrior Three and Sif, or the dark elves and the Convergence, it was still nothing against what the Avengers manage en masse.
Matt Murdock
Double Blind by smilebackwards (Teen, 2381) tumblr: @smilebackwards
Stark snaps his fingers. “You can’t see half of my inventions. This explains so much about you and why you’ve never been properly impressed by me.”
“Does it?” Matt says, ambiguously.
Sam Wilson
Bystander by scribblemetimbers (Teen, 52029)
“I just want you to know,” Sam says loudly, cautiously raising his hands, “That I’m very poor and very sleep-deprived and literally the only thing you can kill me for right now are my notes.” He pauses. Wait. On second thought: “Please don’t steal my notes.”
“I’m not—I’m not a mugger,” Not Mugger rasps out, and for all that he looks about to keel over and die, the man actually manages to sound offended.
Nick Fury
Bedtime Story by dixiehellcat (Teen, 2532) tumblr: @deehellcat
Fury snorted. “I have to check in with the duty officer. I’ll be back in, let’s say twenty minutes. I expect all of you to have whatever your pre-bedtime routines are completed, and be in here pajama’ed and ready to be read to.”
He tapped the book under his arm, then left with the usual dramatic swish of his long coat. Bruce scratched his head. “Did…he just say be ready to be read to?”
Pepper Potts
Pepper and the Avengers (Which She Knows Nothing About) by rebelmeg (General, 6696) tumblr: @rebelmeg
The Avengers, that mismatched group of hurt and heroism, was one of the most important things in Tony Stark’s life. So, naturally, Pepper had made them an important part of her life too.
Vision
039. Intoxicated by aimmyarrowshigh (Teen, 100) tumblr: @aimmyarrowshigh
It might be nice to fit in, just this once. To lose a bit of composure.
Vision floated over to the refrigerator and, with some timidity, pulled off a magnet. He stuck it to his forehead.
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improper-integral · 4 years
Text
I am a little late with this observation, but once sobriety and medication effectively cured my depression (YMMV, I got VERY lucky), I started to notice a side effect. I suddenly have hobbies again! I actually... like doing stuff! Crazy, huh?
I'm putting the rest of this post under a read more, since it's kinda self-indulgent. I've been doing that a lot lately lol. So my current hobbies are:
- Watching TV shows. For a long time before my depression eased, this was ALL I ever did, just binge watched one show after another. Now it's different. First I got invested in SPN again, and then starting in January I've started to lose my mind over gay Chinese shows, which was... not what I was expecting to ever happen? lmao I already have two (the Untamed and Guardian), and I'm already planning to watch a third, Word of Honor, once all the episodes with English subs are available! Not sure when I'll go back to watching American shows...
- Reading fanfiction, of course. I'VE READ SO MUCH FANFIC. And I mean that in the general sense - I've been reading fanfic since 2002 - and also in the last several months, since I took a long break from reading fanfic.
- Writing fanfiction, occasionally. I used to write more when I was younger, over a decade ago. I somehow managed to finish an old Destiel WIP in late 2019, but then suddenly I got inspired to write 2 more fics in the last couple months. I'm feeling on a roll; I'm just waiting for inspiration to strike, but I want to keep writing! Even if I suck at it!
- Learning Spanish, Well, kinda. I'm only using duolingo and lingodeer, two language learning apps, everyday. But over a decade ago, I was a linguistics major, and I studied both French and Spanish. It's been a long time since I felt the passion for languages I once had, but it's slowly coming back. Learning Spanish in particular is also invigorating, because I live in an area with a very high percentage of Spanish speakers, and I've already had IRL conversations with people in Spanish in the last couple months. It's such a thrill!
- A few months ago, I read a popscience book on astrophysics, and it reinforced my absolute fascination with the topic, and then I had the thought: what if I could truly learn it? Not just understand a layman explanation, but understand the science underneath? Once upon a time, I thought I was too stupid to learn math or science, but then I went from being a linguistics major to a software developer, mostly through teaching programming to myself. What that means is, I'm capable of learning anything, if I put my mind to it. Okay, maybe not anything, but the point is, there is literally nothing stopping me from learning it. I'm clearly mentally capable. All I need is discipline, and time. So, I'm doing it slow and carefully: reviewing calculus and linear algebra via khan academy, then learning regular physics, and then learning astrophysics. Now, this goal is a serious undertaking - I'm going at a very slow pace, so I don't expect to accomplish it for probably a few years. But that's more than fine to me - the point is to enjoy the process of learning! I've been doing khan academy everyday for a few months now and it's been a lot of fun! (YES, I find math fun. I know that's weird, but I can't help it. Math is the shit.)
- Finally, since I mentioned being a software developer, I do work on personal projects once in a blue moon. My last one was in October, working on a simple website using the JavaScript React front-end framework and the Python Flask back-end framework. I already have ideas for my next project, mainly focusing on scraping AO3 data and then analyzing it. But the idea is still percolating in my mind. The more I use AO3 as a reader and a writer, the more I want to play around with AO3 in this way as well, but we'll see.
I went from having like 1 hobby to 6, like wow... I'm just so grateful to be alive, and to be able to do all of these fun things 🥰
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mypokepal · 4 years
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Hi, I'd like to request a Poképal! I'm Sagittarius/INFP/4w5. I love watching cartoons/lets plays/art related videos, drawing, writing and walking in my spare time. I'm stubborn about being able to do things by myself, loving about my interests, prone to being abstracted and very self-critical. I'm devoted to those close to me as well as my goals. I've also been called unique for my child-like wonder. I got bullied for it, but I remain hopeful my "evolution" will show everyone who I've become./2
(2/2) I'd like to live in a place that's at most an hour from the city center as well as a nature walking spot, preferably circling a pond or a lake. Oh, and I'm currently studying to become a 3D-producer! Modeling, 3D-printing, animation, stuff like that.
Thank you for waiting for patiently. I’m so sorry. 
I have the perfect partner for you! Let me introduce you to...
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Bagon! I think Bagon would be perfect for you because...
1) Having a big imagination is not something that Bagon hides-in fact, this Pokemon displays this trait unapologetically. Its Pokedex states: “Bagon harbours a nerver ending dream of one day soaring high among the clouds. As if trying to dispel its frustration over its inability to fly, this Pokemon slams its hard head against huge rocks and shatters them into pebbles.” Your child-like wonder and big dreams will be upheld and cherished by Bagon. However, when you fly too close to the sun you’ll get burned. Staying grounded will be something you two will have to work on together. You’ll be each other’s personal cheerleader as well as each other’s reality check. Your guys’ shared experience of judgement and torment will play a huge role in what brings you two together. With both your guys’ determination combined, there is nothing in the world that you two can’t succeed in together.  I recommend you guys take up gym battles to show off how strong your friendship is and to teach everybody who’s ever doubted you a lesson! I think gym leaders will be shocked to see a Bagin battle so well especially given its haste nature but that’s what happens when you train with trust, love and unconditional support.  
2) When two hard-headed and unshakable forces live together, conflict Is bound to happen. Expect to buttheads and argue often with Bagon as your partner. Fighting can bring you guys closer, only, if you swallow your pride and acknowledge when you are in the wrong. You two will need to learn how to put your egos aside and learn to communicate in order to live harmoniously and form a bond. Remember, would you rather lose a dumb fight or a great friend?  In order to avoid emotions building up inside after a long day, go on you beloved walks through nature with Bagon! You don’t even need to speak during these walks but just learning to appreciate the quiet and each other’s presence will benefit you guys greatly. I also recommend introducing Bagon to new outlets for its energy like drawing to express its emotions or reading picture books that have valuable lessons. 
3) Working hard every day to achieve your dreams is incredibly taxing on both the spirit and body. Working too hard every day can also create tension in your relationship! Dedicate a few days to absolutely no work and just play. Introduce Bagon to your video games and channel your guys’ competitiveness through that. Apply your eagerness to learn and evolve with different kinds of classes like cooking or sewing. Different kinds of activities will help Bagon exert energy and get its mind off of flying. When Bagon recognizes its potential and sees that it is capable of doing so much more, it will really help Bagon’s self-image and acceptance. Sometimes you don’t need to evolve and change your physicality in order to succeed, but hone the skills that you already have.
Other Pokemon considered: Electrike, Pawniard
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Rio & Buster
Rio: 😞 Rio: Well, Indie was so fucked she didn't even remember you being there.. soz you were so unforgettable, babe Rio: You get home alright? Buster: Always am, babe 😏 Even if it's the one time I'd rather be without the -un Buster: Course Rio: Ugh, trust you to run with a typo! 😂 Rio: I clued her in but she is not feeling adequately sorry for it, like Rio: didn't clue her in THAT hard, fuck but you know 😒 Buster: Trust you to make it Buster: Both of you missing me that bad already, yeah? Rio: She is, making me wanna slap her if she weren't so clueless what's she's saying 🙄 Bless Rio: and my fingers slipped, what of it boy Buster: At least you don't need to be jealous of her Buster: Hot as that'd be Buster: UNsurprised, you make a habit of that around me, like 😏 Rio: Apparently, I am, like 🤷 Rio: Full of it, she is Rio: too alike, you two, never work Rio: Oh, did she bite you, btw? She's got a loose tooth, how, I ask you... Buster: Well she's your lil mate, so again, unsurprised all around Buster: But nah, bite mark free Buster: Keep sleuthing that one Rio: Not even gonna argue Rio: more of a mini-me than any of my other sibs 😚 Rio: I daren't ask around tbh, we've secured she ain't knocked up, I'll take that so we'll just book the dentist appointment and forget all about it, I reckon Buster: Yeah, she's cockblocked me too now Buster: Thank Christ nobody could've said THAT kid's mine Buster: Don't need another coming Rio: I'm not on team cockblock anymore! Rio: Trust, no one's madder than me Rio: Don't even play that is literally the LAST thing I need on top of everything else Rio: Can you imagine? No wonder Nan had a coronary, if Indie was about to be a Ma...Lawd o mercy Buster: Maybe the dentist'll sort her head out Buster: Nobody's having fun there Buster: Not saying payback for ruining the mood but I'll still take it, cheers Rio: Harsh but Rio: feeling it 😂 Rio: even Mums get to be bitches, yeah? Buster: They're the best at it Buster: Have you met mine? Rio: Not saying you deserve it but Rio: 😉 Buster: Fuck off Buster: You know I deserved last night and that didn't happen Rio: I know Rio: Universe just upping the stakes Rio: Only means I've gotta make it up to you harder when it finally happens Buster: You better Buster: When I come back, clear the fucking schedule Rio: Duh Rio: You best come for AT LEAST a weekend Buster: You'll have to give yourself a week to recover even then Rio: 😏 Rio: Big talk but that's yet to be seen Buster: Trust me, it ain't Rio: Don't tease me when you've only just left Rio: When do you next have an excuse to be back? Buster: Not even trying to it's just Buster: Fuck Buster: Already working on it. Get thinking too, family this big there's gotta be something soon, like Rio: Check the schedule 'fore I clear it, no probs Rio: but I know Rio: I promise I feel it too Rio: [Sends photographic evidence] Buster: What happened to no teasing when I've only just left? Rio: You started it Buster: Doesn't mean you have to finish me off Rio: That's EXACTLY what it means Rio: Hope you're actually back and not still on the plane 😂 Don't mile high without me Buster: Not trying to almost crash a plane and a car in such a short space of time Buster: Bit rude to take the plane down with how desperate you are to go down on me Rio: Gotta gain some self-control boy Rio: getting dangerous now Buster: Don't Buster: Self control is the ultimate cockblock Buster: No going back Rio: You reckon? Buster: Yeah Rio: Had to see Chlo yet? Buster: She's been trying to sext me Buster: So nah Rio: 😬 Rio: Oh honey, no Buster: If she had any game that'd be one thing but she ain't Rio: I can only imagine the levels of vanilla Buster: And don't bother 'cause whatever you reckon it's worse Rio: Ick, yeah I'll save my daydreaming for better, tah Rio: aren't you glad to be back in London town? 😂 Buster: Yeah 'course Buster: Fuck Dublin. Nothing there like Rio: Just decent craic and people, like Rio: but nah, the eye, cracking stuff that Rio: Please 😜 Buster: 😂 Buster: You not planning to visit then? Fine Rio: Can't really, can I Rio: Oh hi guys, just passing Rio: Plus, clearly need to keep a better eye on Indie Buster: Who knows who she might make a move on next Rio: She ain't even shamed, it's terrible 😂 she asked if you were into it Rio: took the liberty of saying no on your behalf so you can't say nothing Buster: Cheers Buster: I'd usually call you out but it's Indie like Rio: 😒 yeah, fight me on that one and we're gonna have trouble Buster: Hot as you are when you're angry, nah Rio: You say that now Rio: Wanna put it to the test? 🥊 Buster: Not yet Rio: Softie Buster: Shut up Buster: You know I ain't when I'm around you Buster: Can't say you've forgotten last night like Indie has Rio: I wish Rio: Can't stop remembering it, like Buster: Yeah? Rio: Yeah Rio: Then I remember how it ended, or didn't Rio: and I'm back to square one Buster: So much for the bathroom memories Buster: Holding Indie's hair back wasn't the one, like Rio: 🤢 Rio: boner killer if ever there was Rio: not, according to her but our vibe was DOA Buster: What? She got form at that has she? Nice Buster: Not my kink like but Rio: Coulda been in your mouth appaz Rio: Lucky you're tall Buster: Fucking hell Buster: Glad I left when I did Buster: Also not, you know but Rio: Yeah Rio: Probably could've left 'em at it and carried on Rio: but even my captivating charm has got limits Rio: 16 year old lads on one is not ideally how I want this going down Buster: Now you tell me Buster: Same though, unsurprisingly Rio: Just saying Rio: She'd never have known, messy bitch Rio: Too old for that shit, huh dad? Buster: Fuck off Buster: I ain't marrying you like Buster: The honeymoon would be worth it but couldn't hack the rest Rio: 😏 Whatever, you got the spawn to prove it Rio: Protest all you like Buster: The attitude's all yours though, ma Rio: Shut up Rio: Just 'cos you were too turned on to deal with the situation effectively Rio: 2nd time btw Rio: not that I'm counting Buster: Not my fault you're such a MILF Rio: 😂 that is so not my category Rio: friggin' cheek Buster: And it's not like you weren't, there was just nothing to prove how turned on you were to Indie and the lads Rio: Your word against mine, babe 😉 Buster: Yeah? Buster: I'll make you say it, trust me Rio: Wish you would Buster: Wish I could right now Rio: Fucking real life getting in the way Buster: Nothing but Chlo looming over me could stop me Buster: Trust her to be descending on my pad Rio: Big enough to hide Rio: just no seek Buster: My dad told her my flight info. Fucking traitor Buster: Can't even pretend I'm not back Rio: Awkward Rio: Feel that shotgun barrel between your shoulder blades? Rio: Meant to be her 'rents, not yours Buster: Don't Buster: Like yeah she said it was an emergency and she had to know, but how clueless is he Buster: Fuck's sake Rio: Clearly your Ma ain't as psycho as she seems Rio: Chlo's a special breed Buster: Christ. She really is Rio: Don't envy you at all Rio: my ex's antics seem ridiculously tame in comparison Buster: Have you heard from the latest? Rio: Oh yeah Rio: my own fault for repeating but truly opened the floodgates there Buster: Third time's the charm, ain't that what they say Rio: He's gonna magically get better, is he? Rio: I doubt that Rio: Indie reckons I gotta diversify anyway, hit that target demographic Buster: You could teach him Buster: Proper ma moves Rio: Some shit can't be taught, McKenna Rio: like not being a total twat Buster: Is he giving you grief? Buster: I'll sort it if he is Rio: Love a bit of chivalry, don't you Rio: Nah, he just is one, its nothing personal Buster: I mean it, Rio. Anyone is. Tell me and they won't Rio: You're cute Rio: I can handle myself though, you don't need to worry Buster: I ain't worried, just saying Rio: Shh Buster: You gonna make me? Rio: Such hard work, boy Rio: Give it my best shot across like Buster: You love it Buster: Always working like Rio: Got bills to pay 'til Indie can herself Buster: Keep the hustle going, babe Buster: I gotta run, Chlo's here Rio: Enjoy Rio: Tell her I said hiya Buster: Hey Rio: You're alive then Rio: How was it? Buster: Course Buster: Take more than her to kill my vibe Buster: How are you? Rather hear that Rio: You sure Rio: No shame in it Rio: She's...a lot Rio: I'm cool, getting ready for a shift Buster: It's my own fault, can't be crying over it, can I? Rio: 'Course you can Rio: Mixed reviews of judgment and lack of sympathy with the rest but I ain't gonna come at you with either Rio: better to rant here than to her, init Buster: Yeah Buster: Not like she'd listen but I'd know what I said Rio: So, still acting like she deaf blind n dumb then? Buster: About me and her at least Buster: I can't make it clearer Buster: Might have to fuck you in front of her, sorry like Rio: Steady on, like Rio: How has she got this far in life being so delusional? I blame the parents Rio: does she legit think she can gaslight you into a relationship like babe Rio: what's the idea here Buster: They don't stock brains in YSL Buster: I can't keep at this with her Rio: Its shit Rio: and you thought I played games Rio: got to find her breaking point with wanting you, but you can't go so far that she will try and withhold the kid from you as punishment Rio: gotta find the line before you can toe it like Buster: Yeah Buster: Never calling you a tryhard again, babe Rio: Definitely won't stick to that but Rio: happily let her take the title and crown Rio: maybe when her hormones quiet down she'll be better? ehh, comforting lie anyone? Buster: Maybe Buster: They better, I'm done with this shit Rio: Not long to go now Buster: All I do is wait now Buster: Sick of it Rio: I know Rio: Gotta let the kid finish cooking though, then you'll have Uni too Rio: it'll all pay off Buster: I know Rio: Try and enjoy your last summer of freedom, yeah? Buster: Yeah Buster: No pressure Rio: Gotta get used to it Rio: May as well be now Buster: Cheers Buster: Feel so much better now like Rio: You want me to bullshit you? Rio: That's the life you want, right? Pressure is your rocket fuel, like Buster: I'm just playing Rio: Oh, then that's the spirit Buster: 😏 Rio: Such a headfuck Buster: Says you, babe Rio: I'm not having a kid, like Rio: we all almost made it to adulthood Buster: There's always one fucking it up for the rest Buster: Why not me? Rio: Why not Rio: probably fucked up some bets, won others Buster: I'll take that Rio: Defending my honour and taking the first bullet Rio: What a doll Buster: Like you said, chivalry's my thing Rio: If it works for ya Rio: Not complaining Buster: You're not complaining cause it works for you too Rio: Maybe Buster: Can't deny it, babe Rio: Can and will Buster: Not for much longer Rio: Promises, promises, McKenna Buster: You know I'll keep 'em Rio: You've gotta at this point Rio: Can't not happen Buster: Understatement Rio: even if its just once Buster: Can you handle that? Rio: If I have to Rio: try and be a good girl about it Buster: You've got as much chance of that as you have of ignoring me ever Rio: I reckon that's just a cover for how little faith you've got in yourself on that one Rio: 🤷 Buster: My word against yours, babe Rio: We both know the truth, though Buster: Yeah? Buster: What do you reckon Rio: I reckon we both know once ain't gon' be enough Buster: Especially if we do it right Rio: Dunno how else to do it, babe Buster: Good Rio: Why is it you always see the people you don't wanna out, like Rio: catch me 'changing the barrel' multiple times Buster: Which cunt is it tonight like? Rio: Every cunt Rio: Told you off for dissing but genuinely sick of Dubo atm Rio: every punter's a comedian, or reckons they know where Edie is but then gives fuck all useful information actually Buster: Come here Buster: I know you don't wanna leave her but we can still keep tabs the same Rio: I know you're right, what use am I actually being, like Rio: but Rio: Idk, it don't matter Buster: Tell me Rio: Well, I know she didn't mean it how she said it, 'cos she took it back straight away Rio: but Indie says I'm only sticking around 'cos I'm guilty, and when I feel better, I'll fuck off Rio: and I don't want her to think I don't feel guilty Rio: or that I'm leaving her Buster: Fuck Buster: It's shit that you had to hear it though Rio: I'd rather she said it than silently thought it but Rio: yeah Buster: You've got nothing to feel guilty about, you know that, yeah? Rio: Don't lie Buster: I'm not Rio: Right Rio: Well, stop being nice then Buster: Say it first Buster: You've done nothing wrong Rio: I can't, Buster Buster: You won't. Different thing Buster: You can Rio: I don't wanna lie Rio: in general but especially just so I kid myself Rio: what's the point Buster: It ain't a lie, babe Buster: I promise you Rio: Certainly didn't help the situation did it Rio: what I do, fuck shit up for the rest 'cos I can't keep my knickers up Buster: Shut up Buster: That's the lie there Buster: They'd be fucked without you and you know it Rio: Or I'd be fucked without them Rio: am fucked, let's face it Buster: Bullshit Buster: You're perfect, remember? Rio: Only when we're playing Buster: You know that ain't true Rio: S'alright Rio: I've had my bathroom breakdown, mascara barely touched, we're good to go Buster: One of these days you're gonna believe me Rio: Never Rio: but its fun pretending with you Buster: I've told you before, you're real Buster: And how good you look is too real Rio: Why can't you be a dick to me Rio: I'd know how to deal with that Buster: I don't want to Rio: Selfish Buster: Not when it proper counts Rio: Humble brag Rio: thanks for the heads up or this would be really awkward and disappointing Buster: Thrive under pressure, remember? Buster: No worries Rio: You ain't worried, I know Rio: Know you're no scared virgin with it Buster: Nor you Rio: One thing I ain't scared of Buster: Rio Buster: You can tell me whatever, you know Rio: Yeah? Rio: that part of the deal now? Buster: If you want Rio: I dunno, you'll have to handle the paperwork Rio: wanna distract you from the pressure, not add more Buster: Why not? Thrive on it Buster: And I ain't scared of nothing so Rio: Fine line, babe Buster: I can walk it Rio: You're so sure, huh? Buster: Yeah Rio: Shouldn't be surprised Rio: cocky bastard Buster: No arguments here Rio: Only 'cos you're Mr. Nice Guy all of a sudden Rio: don't be TOO nice, yeah? Buster: You wanna fight, babe 🥊 Go on Rio: Not exactly what I had in mind Rio: submission is more than willing, like Buster: It's not gonna be that easy Rio: Why not? You don't wanna give me what I deserve? Buster: I don't wanna just give you anything Buster: Where's the fun in that Rio: 🤤 Rio: that's the Buster I want Buster: How bad Rio: You still gotta ask? Rio: I do need to work harder to show you Buster: I don't have to Buster: Just want to Rio: I get it Rio: I'm nowhere near tired of hearing it either Rio: tired of it being all chat though fr 😒 Buster: I feel that too Buster: Soon, I swear Rio: Promise? Rio: To the point I don't even fucking care, if people keep getting in the way then they only got themselves to blame Buster: Yeah Buster: We've held back long enough Buster: Too fucking long Rio: Practically a saint over here Rio: and a nun Buster: You better not be Rio: Yeah, found Jesus in the time it took yas Rio: and he's a top ride, like Buster: 😂
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