#thank you for letting me ramble for these and possibly contradict myself many times!! ❤️
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freshairforrabbits · 1 year ago
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Yayy!!! I've been waiting for a stuff like this!!
🍑🍋 for Quaritch (in any AU, I guess) and 🎂 for 'you circled me' Spider.
Thank you so much for these!!
Putting it under the cut like the others since it has the typical Southern Gothic AU themes of implied abuse, rape, and incest:
🍑 [PEACH] How do they show their kindness? How kind are they truly?
Gonna do Circled Me!Quaritch for these ones because fuck it he's super OCifyed there, like I'm fully aware i could clean that AU up and make an actual book, and i might one day-- who knows 😳. But fuck, I think there are actually a lot of ways he shows his kindness, like true kindness, the sort of warmth and safety a kid is supposed to have because the worst part of abuse (any kind of abuse) is when it's within the family, when it's coupled with moments like Dad letting you have a cold soda, or buying you some stupid game or a cool shirt, or some nicer shoes even if you don't really have the money. I think Quaritch, for as much as he isn't physically affectionate in that verse in a way that's good, he has moments where he would pull Spider in close and tell him he was proud of him. Of course, he never says he loves him-- but he'll laugh with him, playfully shove him, chase him around when Spider was little and play pretend even. He'd put him up on his shoulders in a crowd, he'd buy him some candy that Spider pointed out, hell, even Spider's name-- it's a nickname that comes from the other kids, and while his dad calls him Miles most of the time, he's also completely aware Spider is his son's name as well. But, at the end of the day, those moments of kindness never ever outweigh the pain and hurt, he's an asshole, he's cruel, he's mean, he's egotistical and self-serving and only sacrifical when it makes him look good. And he knows how to be a charming suck-up, he knows being kind means he might get things, so he weaponizes that Southern Hospitality. I think even with Paz he was never truly kind in a way that was ever gonna work out for them, and now he thinks kindness means keeping his son under his thumb in every way possible. Keeping him safe from the big bad world and teaching him about the way things have to be, what's kinder than someone telling you what to do, how to feel, how to live and think?
🍋 [LEMON] What is their kryptonite/ultimate weakness?
God, this is a tough one to think of maybe because it is as simple as Spider? But also, it's not just that simple. I think his ultimate weakness is he genuinely believes he's some kind of savior (a la Negan from the Walking Dead style) that what he's doing is Fixing his small little world. That he can fix this new and improved and younger Jake, he can save him from making the same mistakes as his asshole brother, he just needs to get with the program and boy does rJake do just that. In fact he fucking excels, and Spider, well he's reaching an age where he doesn't need his daddy so much anymore-- he's getting older, soon enough he'll be going away to college if he manages to get the scholarships and grants for it. But Spider is everything Quaritch needs to keep living, if Spider goes away, Jake isn't enough to alleviate the guilt and the impulses and all that shit cooked in his head about how much he Wants to mean to his son. And if that means becoming God, Daddy the Deranged, then that's what he'll do. His weakness is the fact he can't fucking live without someone to worship the ground he walks on, so he's gonna do anything to get that.
🎂 [BIRTHDAY CAKE] How does your OC celebrate their birthday? With who, and where?
I think Spider's birthdays were relatively normal prior to everything! Nothing to write home about, only getting a bit weird when Jake joined the picture just because suddenly it wasn't him and his dad celebrating alone. I'm thinking for Spider birthdays were like any other day, and his dad might not even do more than pick up a cake from the store, one of the discounted ones with someone else's name on it that they'd both laugh and joke about. But after that fateful farm trip at fourteen, birthdays are gonna look a little different 😼 and Spider's gonna suddenly be terrified of them, not that he wasn't overjoyed about them before (especially when his dad would act a bit weird about how many candles he'd have to put on the cake, how he'd bring up how big Spider's getting and then seem to treat him like he was just a little boy still, like he didn't want him to grow up at all, and unfortunately Paz died soon after Spider was born so while Spider's birthday isn't exactly a death day anniversary, it's still a reminder. Things still get tense and the days following his dad would smoke more, snap easier, and get pissed about little shit even though they were chummy just a week before. Because nothing is stable in Spider's life and he's been through the gauntlet of abuse even before things turned sexual). BUT fuck birthdays after that, if Spider gets to his fifteenth with Quaritch and Jake still around (only time will tell when I finally get around to writing part 2 of circled me 😈), he'll be having a bad time with frosting and icing like a repeat of that one incident with Jake only every card is on the table, and he'll never be able to look at blue icing or birthday candles the same way ever again.
In an ideal world, in ones Spider's imagined in daydreams to escape his own reality even from a young age, he has his birthday with other people, friends, his cousins further north, with Kiri, Lo'ak, Neteyam, and the rest (even his mom who he can't help imaging her being there alive and whole and warm and safe), at his grandparents farm where every memory there was always so cozy and safe, even with the scarier bits at the time-- where he was more visible and his dad couldn't be such a dickhead to him, and they didn't fight and scream at each other so much. Where everyone was around the table, the lights dimmed, the candles casting their glow and he was smiling enough to make his cheeks hurt, and there were presents and games and other family rituals and customs he didn't grow up with but always wanted. But now those daydreams are drenched in terror and the farm will never feel safe again.
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