#i'm trying to at least get all the small bios finished

[aloesarchives]

Domestic Headcanons w/ Mama!Reader and the Fushiguros #2: New Addition to the Family!

TW/Warnings: Domesticity, AFAB/Female Reader, Family life, Pregnancy, Mention of Creampies but not sexual, unhinged crack, JJK OC(but not main x Reader)

Pairing: Toji Fushiguro x Fem!Reader

Pronouns/Usage: She/Her, Mama/Mom

It was about time I finished this, been sitting in my drive for a few months. Anyway, this is a general headcanon that takes place mostly in my Modern Au as Mayumi will appear in future along with her bio. But she may appear in my "Toji Lives" au depending how I'm really feeling, I will probably age her up if I do.

If you has questions or wanna ask more about her, feel free to drop an ask in my inbox!

Introducing:

Name: Mayumi (L/N) Fushiguro

Kanji Name: 万優三

Age: 2-3(Modern Au)

Given how Toji is a dog 25/8 whenever he’s given any alone time with you, Megumi is genuinely surprised he and Tsumiki don’t have at least two or more younger siblings.

It mostly comes down to you and Toji’s schedules and how having another child or having more children wouldn’t be the best choice for you two and the kids themself.

It was decided by you AND Toji that Megumi would be your last child since baby Megumi was a hassle and you two were dealing with two kids under the age of three. As time went on, raising the two was hard work but both of you two managed. Now Tsumiki and Megumi are in high school and can function, there’s no need for you and Toji to treat them like children even though they will always be your babies.

But with Tsumiki and Megumi always away at school, it’s mostly you and Toji at home. Yes, it was nice and peaceful to have your house with you and your hubby. But you start longing for the days your children were younger and small. Missing when Megumi would call you Mama and Tsumiki with Mommy. You become all sentimental especially looking through family pictures throughout the house and the family albums. You started to miss having to take care of a little one in the house.

Toji notices this change in your behavior so he asks what's on your mind. When you tell him you missed your children being children, he suggested having one more child. This shocked you considering that Toji told you himself that Megumi was your two’s last child. He didn’t want to have any more after that because Megumi was a handful. You told him if he’s not comfortable and isn’t ready for another one that he shouldn’t force himself just to make you happy. You’ll just satisfy it with old baby pictures from the past.

You didn’t want to have a child just because you wanted a baby to coddle and that’s it. All children deserve to have a parent but not every parent deserves a child. But Toji brings up the point that both you and him are more stable, both financially and mentally, and have more time to be at home. Since your two other children are teenagers who can do basic functions, you can focus on taking care of a child while taking care of teenagers.

After some time and Toji being the little devil on your shoulder, you gave the green light to have another child. Albeit being the last child you and Toji will ever have.

Toji is excited to have another kid with you and to give Tsumiki and Megumi a younger sibling. But we all know why Toji is REALLY happy to give you another child. As the man got to stepping in making you pregnant and having another kid. This man put so many creampies in you it’s insane.

But you guessed the universe wanted to make it easier the third time because, like all of your pregnancies which is only two, you got pregnant fast. It only took a month of trying to get pregnant. Just like any pregnancy, it was rough. It was your third time so you expected what’s to come, though it had been 12 years since you were last pregnant. But Toji, being your ever loving husband, took care of you and was at your beck and call(Explain in detail here). Your scary, intimidating, and grumpy dog of a husband becomes your sweet and protective puppy all over again(if Toji wasn’t fucking already lol).

You wanted to wait until a visible ultrasound was possible to tell your two children. Luckily, Megumi and Tsumiki would be home right after school ends and you would tell them the news. After dinner, you told your two children to wait a bit at the table as you got the ultrasound that’s sealed in an envelope. As you just place the envelope in front of your kids, they look at it curiously. Toji chuckles as Megumi flips the envelope on both sides before Tsumiki grabs it from her brother.

“So we opened it, Mom? What’s inside?”

“You’ll find out once you open it, my dear.”

Then Tsumiki opens the envelope and finds the picture. She takes it out and holds it so she and Megumi can look at it. It took Tsumiki a few seconds to figure out as her smile extended. Megumi is still confused when his sister says, “Are you really, mom?!”

You nodded your head as Tsumiki stood up from her chair and gave you a hug. Megumi was still trying to wrap his head around the picture. Toji chuckles at his son as he walks over to him. “Are you okay, Megumi? You’ve been staring at that picture like it was a puzzle.” “I don’t know what I’m supposed to be looking at. How come Tsumiki got it before I did?” Tsumiki goes to Megumi as she starts explaining the picture. Before she even finishes, your son looks at you with wide eyes as he blurts out, “You’re pregnant, Mom?!”

Toji bursts out in laughter at Megumi while you smile at your son. You were happy that your children felt the same way you did, especially seeing Megumi smile. You were worried about the age gap between your children and their youngest sibling but it seems to not be a problem to your kids. 

You loved the fact your children were happy about having another sibling.

Ever since the announcement, Megumi has been home more often. While your children have been more considerate(if they weren’t already), Megumi had this shift in behavior that made you a little worried. Once you were in your 2nd trimester, Megumi always tried to be home before sundown. He always called you after school if you needed anything from the grocery or convenience store. He was very reluctant to leave you alone. At home, he always checks up on you whether you’re in the bedroom, sitting on the couch, in your home office/personal rooms. 

As much as Megumi says he doesn’t take after his dad, you thought it was adorable and endearing how Megumi looked after you like Toji did. Because of your already fluctuating hormones, you dote and gush over Megumi way more than usual. You didn’t before because you wanted to respect Megumi’s space and independence. Always playfully pinching his cheeks, giving your mama kisses, petting and ruffling his hair, the list goes on. Megumi never pushes you away or rejects your affection because you are his mama and it makes you happy. It’s also because Megumi loves your affection as it reminds him of when he was a little boy, but since he’s older he wants to be taken more seriously and wants you and Toji to treat him as such. Yet it bit him in the ass because you respected his wishes and only gave him physical affection when he gave the green light.

Megumi, every time he’s home, is stuck at your side. You’re in the kitchen making yourself a drink, Megumi is sitting at the table already. On the couch folding a small laundry batch, Megumi’s helping you with it. Sitting in the garden underneath the tree, Megumi makes you sit on the blanket as sits beside you with his dogs laid out in the shade. The only time he isn’t is when you’re in the bathroom or sleeping in your bedroom. But Megumi sends his dogs to watch over you during your naps. Bro, Toji told Megumi to make room for him on the couch just for him to side-eyes his dad and say “no”. Then Megumi’s dogs appear next to you and lay their heads on your lap. Toji was so annoyed.

But you didn’t know how concerned Megumi was for you until you Gojo called you and said Megumi wanted to opt out of dorming his first year at Jujutsu Tech. You asked Gojo if Megumi said why and Gojo only said, “Megumi-kun only told me he just can’t, (Y/N)-sama.” By the time the call happened you were in your third trimester, meaning you were nearing your due date. You asked Toji if he knew but he had no clue either. You and your husband had a talk with Megumi about it. Megumi said he didn’t need to dorm when he’s in high school because he could just walk to school from the house. But Toji being the better interrogator, he got Megumi to spill the real reason. And so Megumi reveals he doesn't want to dorm once he goes to Jujutsu Tech because he wants to help out around the house and watch his little sibling grow up. 

“Megs, you know I’m home, right?”

Megumi looks at his father before continuing.

“As I was saying, I need to be here in my little sister’s life. I don’t want to be a stranger because she can’t remember me, Mom.”

You gave a reassuring smile to your son, placing a hand on his shoulder to comfort him.

“I get it, Megumi. I completely understand where you’re coming from. But I’ll be fine, don’t worry about me. I have your sister and papa after all to help me, especially your papa since he can cook anything we ask for. And know the school requires their first years to live on campus, so you do have to live on school grounds. You can always come back whenever you need to, this will always be your home, My Dear Megumi–Wait, little sister? You think it’ll be a girl, Megumi?”

He shrugs, causing Toji to raise his brow at him.

“Ya sure, Megs? You don’t think it’ll be a boy? Don’t you want another boy in the family?”

Megumi squints at his dad as he frowns.

“If I know this family, your genes are too strong, Dad. I’m a complete copy of you and Tsumiki only got Mom’s personality and smile. If it’s a boy, it will be another version of you and I don’t even wanna think about that. Plus, I wouldn’t mind having a baby sister around, especially if she takes after Mom.”

You were flattered and honored that Megumi felt this way while Toji was utterly offended at his own son.

Megumi is a good brother and son all over. He looks after you, he looks out for Tsumiki when he can, and has a good relationship with Toji. You’d think he’ll be an amazing older brother considering how caring and gentle he can be. He may be a little clumsy but he tries and that is what matters. 

You decided to bring Megumi and Tsumiki with you and Toji to your next ultrasound appointment. Luckily, no problems were detected for the precious Fushiguro baby. The doctor and technician also revealed that you were having a baby girl! Tsumiki is visibly happy, slightly shaking Megumi's shoulders while he had a soft smile of his own. Then you looked over at your husband to see him with a wide but genuine grin.

“What’s with the grin, Toji?”

“Nothing, Hon. Just thinking.”

“About what?”

“Having another girl to spoil~.”

Your pregnancy goes as planned. Much to the dismay of Megumi, you gave birth while they were in school. As soon as Megumi and Tsumiki walk out of the school doors, they see Toji with the car waiting for them. “C’mon you two, don’t ‘cha want to meet your baby sister?” Tsumiki never saw Megumi sprinted towards the car so fast, whipping past her. Toji just laughs at Megumi’s eagerness to go see you and the baby.

Megumi is bouncing his leg in the car as they go to drive to the hospital. Once checking in, Megumi leaves his dad and sister in the dust to go find your room. Once he did, Megumi knocked gently before going inside with Toji and Tsumiki not far behind. Then the kids see the little baby bundled in your arms, sleeping away as you greet your older children. 

Megumi was right because Mayumi took after you except her eye color, which was like Megumi and Toji. But everything else, she was a carbon copy of you. You joked to Toji about being even since your third child looks like you. Toji goes along with it but he can’t help but feel warm inside knowing he has a daily reminder of his beautiful wife.

Megumi and Tsumiki get to hold their little sister. It was game over for Megumi because as soon as she was in his arms, he’d do anything for her. He was melting for his little sister and she didn’t even know it yet.

Megumi tries to spend a lot of time with her until he has to dorm at Jujutsu Tech. Megumi gets sentimental when he sees her baby pictures then and now she’s a toddler speaking full sentences. 

She loves to be held or sitting in someone’s lap. You, Toji, Tsumiki and Megumi, it doesn’t matter. She just likes to be close. It took her a long time to understand personal space but she tries her best. But she mostly likes being held by Toji since he’s tall. Plus she says Toji gives nice hugs. 

But Mayumi is picky when it comes to other people. She gets comfortable through exposure but she doesn’t like other people that much. She knows the others and is fine with them, but she’s not so much a people person. Not shy, just like a small circle.

Mayumi calls Tsumiki Miki-Nee or Tsumi Nee-san, then Mayumi calls Megumi Gumi-Nii and/or Mimi Nii-san.

Toji’s nicknames for Mayumi are Princess, Little Lady, Sweet Pea, and Snapdragon. Sometimes he does a variation of her name like Yumi or Mayu. But those don’t start coming until she’s much older.

Toji gets bummed out that Mayumi hangs out with Megumi and is her self-proclaimed favorite person. But you always remind him that she loves all of you, including him. This is true when she gets picked up by Toji at daycare or Toji comes home and she greets him. Always a smile on her face, arms out-stretched, while saying “Papa!”

Every time Toji is doing something outside, she’s either playing on the engawa, underneath the tree for shade, or running around and playing in the garden and the Koi pond nearby. She mostly likes watching the koi fishes swim around. She even deeps her feet into the crystal blue water as the fish gently nibble on her feet.

She’s also not a picky eater. Will eat anything and everything put in front of her that is seen as food. Her favorites are berries.

Mayumi’s favorite person is definitely Megumi. Toji thought it was him but he soon found out that was not the case. All because her first words weren’t Mama or Papa, her first words were Gumi. Then she started walking because she saw Megumi sitting on the couch while you were making lunch with Toji and took her first steps because she wanted to be near him. Sometimes when she can’t sleep, has a nightmare, or wants someone to take her to the bathroom, she usually goes to Megumi because his room is the closet. Some mornings, you would find Mayumi sleeping alongside Megumi. She usually hangs out in Megumi’s room doing her own thing or playing with his dogs. Megumi doesn’t mind but only gets annoyed when he’s napping or sleeping and she wakes him up. 

But she also hangs out in Tsumiki’s room too. Trying a new hairstyle, clothes, or playing with her stuffed animals. Tsumiki makes Mayumi into a Sanrio fan and even gives some of her plushies to Mayumi because she doesn’t play with them anymore. Every morning, Mayumi goes to Tsumiki to do her hair for the day. Sometimes asking Tsumiki to put a nice hair clip or bow for her. Mayumi’s so happy once she’s done that she shows you and Toji and it’s just so sweet oml.

She loves Megumi’s dogs and shikigamis. But her favorites are his white and black doggos. She loves playing and hugging them, always so gently with them. She likes to put ribbons on them like a collar and read to them. She would nap while laying on top of the white dog’s side and the black one is guarding her feet, making a protective circle around her. Then they allow her to grab onto them to help her practice walking. It’s so cute.

Mayumi knocks on doors before she enters. You don’t know where she picked it up from until you remember knocking on the doors yourself as you hold her. You assume she picked your habit, which turns out to be useful and courteous. It’s always three short knocks, keeping this habit even as a teenanger. 

Mayumi is the apple of the family’s eye and almost everyone, even for Yuuji, Nobara, Maki, Yuuta, Toge, Panda, and fucking Hakari and Kiara. They all have a soft spot for her. The worst of them all is Satoru, proclaiming he’s her big brother to which Suguru smacks him on the hand for it. He tries to win her over but his grand gift-giving actually scares her and makes her wary of him, much to Satoru’s dismay. To which goes to my next point:

Bro, your daughter doesn’t like Satoru. It’s high-key funny. She doesn’t hate him per say. She’s more scared and unsettled by him. One time, she started crying late at night because she had a nightmare. Megumi, with Mayumi in his arms, had to knock on your bedroom door because she was inconsolable and wouldn’t tell Megumi anything. Took all three of you, and eventually Tsumiki joined in, to calm her down. She was sniffling, burying her face into your neck, gripping her little hands as tightly as she could.

“Mayumi, Honey, do you feel a little better now?”

She nods into you but still holding on to you for dear life.

“Can you tell us what’s wrong? Please, Sweetheart?”

“White monster…The white monster with blue-eyes…Scary smile with pointing teeth…”

Tsumiki and Megumi looked at each other confused, you were just trying to figure out where she got that image from, while Toji held a frown before his eyes opened a bit upon realization. He has this goofy smile as he takes Mayumi from your arms and holds her in his own. Upon feeling being inside Toji’s arms, she instantly relaxes and looks up at him with a pout.

“So there’s a monster in your bedroom, Princess? You want me and your big brother Megumi to look for any monsters?”

She looks up at him with her little pout, sniffles, and nods her head quietly. Clutching to Toji like a Koala. Toji gets up with a grunt along with Megumi and they go into her room to look for the “monster”. Turning both the lights on and off along with Megumi bringing his dogs out. Mayumi watches the dogs sniff out her room, under her bed, and her closet.

“No monster, Gumi-Nii?”

Megumi pats her head softly.

“Yeah, no monsters in here, Mayumi.”

She’s still pouting even though Megumi confirmed no monsters while Toji rubs her back gently.

“Well Little Lady, you’re gonna sleep with Mama and I tonight so no monsters can get you. If there are, I’ll eat them.”

Mayumi giggles as he takes her into your shared bedroom to sleep peacefully for the night. Luckily she did as she snoozed away on his chest along with you tucked into his shoulder as your head rested on top of its side.

The next day, Satoru, Suguru, Shoko, Nanami, Haibara, and Yaga came to your house to talk about something. As they were discussing in your personal office, Mayumi knocks and she comes in to be held by you. While being held by you, you feel Mayumi shifting in your arms. You look down as she looks at Satoru with wary eyes. She clutches closer to you as she whines. Satrou looks over at her and smiles, causing her to hide into you further. By then, you noticed Satoru didn’t bring his blindfold. He brought his glasses instead so you could see the glimpses of his eyes. As soon Mayumi caught a glimpse of his eyes, she started getting uncomfortable and whining. You’re worried as you try to calm her down but nothing works. Then Toji comes in with the pitcher of water you asked for and she makes grabby hands at him. Your husband takes her in his arms and she points at Satoru while sniffling, making everyone, including you curious.

“What’s wrong this time, Mayumi?”

“Papa,” 

Points at Satoru

“White monster…big blue eyes and white teeth…that’s him…”

Everyone blinks a couple of times except for Toji who has his dastardly grin. Then the silence is broken by Suguru’s cackling followed by Haibara bursting out in laughter. Now you understand why Toji wasn’t so concerned about last night because he knew what Mayumi was talking about. The monster was random, she had a nightmare about Satoru. Nanami smirks while Yaga and Shoko chuckle at this. The only ones who weren’t anything were You and Satoru. You because you’re just shaking your head at Suguru, Toji, and Haibara. While Satoru looked like a hurt puppy that was kicked. You tried to comfort your unofficial oldest child but he just stayed hurt. He let out a sigh when he and your daughter made brief eye-contact before she hid herself in Toji, causing him to bark out in laughter. His laugh joined in with the other two. 

Toji calms down a bit before comforting Mayumi.

“Princess, that’s just Gojo. He’s not a scary monster, see? He’s harmless.”

Mayumi looks at Satoru before looking at you then Toji. She shakes her head at Toji causing him to chuckle. Mayumi says bye to everyone as she leaves the room with Toji. But Suguru wouldn’t stop teasing Satoru about it and it’s an inside joke everyone is in on.

So that’s why Satoru always wears his blindfold on because he doesn’t want to make Mayumi cry. As she gets older, she gets over it and funny enough doesn’t remember this event. No matter how much anyone brings it up, she can’t fully remember any of it. But their relationship gets better later on.

Though Mayumi’s humble, she’s spoiled. By you, Toji, Tsumiki, Megumi, your family, even Suguru and Satoru, specifically Satoru. Mayumi gets an allowance of 38,948 yen(which is roughly equivalent to $250 US dollars) from Satoru every month, and that’s not including holidays and birthdays. Toji and Satoru are fighting each other on who’s better at spoiling her to which you have to calm them down because it shouldn’t be a big deal.

Mayumi gets all sad and pouty when Megumi has to live on campus but Megumi promises to call frequently or visit once a week for her. Megumi gives her his old plushies of his twin dogs, telling her to hug them when she feels like missing him. Because of that, she is overly attached to them. She sleeps with them, goes to the bathroom with them, brings them outside to the garden, goes out, they come with her everywhere she goes.

Megumi hangs a drawing she made of him and Mayumi with his dogs in his dorm room. Also has a picture frame of him and her on his desk too.

When Megumi brings Yuuji and Nobara over, they always want to play with her. Nobara dresses her up while Yuuji shadow boxes with her. When they come over to sleep over, it’s twice the fun. Yuuji and Nobara get bummed out when it’s her bedtime but they remember they see her in the morning so it’s all good.

They also help Megumi watch and babysit her when you and Toji are out on a date/outing. It’s chaotic but it’s fun.

Toji and Megumi will be irritated and annoyed when someone, other than you and Tsumiki, asks them for anything Gojo. But once Mayumi starts asking for things, they won’t even bat an eye. She is spoiled by both her grumpy older brother and menacing father. One time you came home to see your daughter gleefully smiling at you, holding her plushie tightly as she told you about what she did with Toji and Megumi. Then you look over to see your son and husband wearing bows on their heads and had sanrio stickers all over them.

Mayumi’s such a bubbly and happy child that it’s like looking straight at the sun. Of course, she takes after you mostly both in personality and physical traits. It’s not until she’s in teens when Toji’s traits start revealing themselves in her.

Tags w/ links:

@luqueam @ploylulla @tqd4455 @wolywolymoley @captainbabybear @ravenswife

Tags w/o links:

@szillx @SleppyAnn @g0th1xac1d @kneelarhmstrung

Taglist form Here!

[an-au-blog]

Artist Usopp who has the most vivid dreams of Sanji ever since he can remember, this mysterious blond growing alongside him in the unconscious world. So he grows up, goes to art school, gets his degree, and starts the path of a starving artist. Not a lot of people buy his art, but he keeps making it. He never liked showing the overwhelmingly large collection of sketches, paintings, 3D prints, carvings, clay figurines, literally anything he could make of Sanji. It felt too personal to show anyone, but people would inevitably see them, as he can't stop doodling the man. They keep saying that's what he should be promoting as his work and how people would pay big money for those, but he always doubted it.

A time came where he could feel the "starving artist" title a bit too literally. With regret, he took his friend's advice and sold a painting to some random guy. The man came back with a friend - lover of the arts and before Usopp knew it, he was selling the blond of his dreams to collectors and museums. He started making marble sculptures, now that he could afford it, like the blond was a greek god, an angel sent to feed him in his most desperate times. Usopp knew such a man didn't exist, but it was nice to have him in his dreams at least.

Well... that was until one day Luffy sent him a video. One of those memes where people went to galleries and posed with victorian portraits that looked like them. He captioned it with "lol rly thought it was him for a sec". Usopp thought this would be another video forgotten in the waves of spam Luffy liked to send, but as the different people went by, suddenly, Usopp felt cold sweat down his back. It was the blond. He looked exactly like the man in his dreams... no. that was the same man. He was absolutely sure of it. He had been drawing and studying that face, those hands, the colors and curves all his life. That was him!

He desperately tried finding him, but all he had was a private page and that was it. He couldn't get any clue as to who he was from the user name "LetHimCook" or the bio saying he was 21 and a rat and a cheff's hat emoji.

Usopp gave up hope for the time being as he was supposed to finish a project that was the biggest in his career so far.

The day to present it had come and Usopp stood there, nervous, talking about his art while snobbish-looking people hummed as if they understood anything about his life's work. Some of the asked questions that he absentmindedly answered, but then someone from the back, who Usopp couldn't see asked something that caught his attention.

"I have two questions if I may. Firstly, who is the inspiration to this "dream" collection? It seems to be more about a lover than actual dreams. And secondly, have you ever considered doing an auto portrait?"

The two unrelated questions caught him off guard, and he didn't know how to say anything about the first one without sounding insane, or the second - without sounding depressed.

"Uhm, interesting questions." Usopp cleared his throat. "You see, uh..." he tried finding the words but they died on his tongue when the asker came into view. It was him. "It's you." He said accidentally out loud.

"I beg your pardon?"

They look at each other for a long second. Usopp couldn't tear his eyes away from the blue haunting his every day and night. "Sorry, I- I didn't answer your uh-" Usopp stuttered, trying to keep any semblance of dignity he could. "I don't like doing self portraits, I've made a few but the model kind of sucks." The people laughed with him but the blond only gave a small smile.

"I would love to see them some time, as I'm sure I'm not the only one."

How could this man leave him speechless every time.

After the Q&A bit was over, Usopp tried his best to avoid small talk from the guests so he could get to the blond before he left. But by the time he got there, Sanji was talking to someone, it would have been extremely awkward to join in.

"Hey, Usopp!" The man who was talking to Sanji turned, and oh God it was Luffy.

The artist didn't know if he should be happy or a bit scared. Luffy dragged Usopp into the conversation and it started flowing quite easily. It was not long before Luffy left to see another friend of his but his absence didn't make it uncomfortable. Usopp learned the man's name, that he loved to cook and that he had been a fan of his work for a while.

Agreeing that Sanji would get a "private tour" or the rest of Usopps (not displayed works), the "party" ends.

On their way home, Luffy hits him with a "It was so funny seeing that guy flirt with you all night."

Usopp, stopping dead in his tracks: Who?

Luffy: Blond guy who kinda looks like your obsession drawings...

Usopp malfunctioning: .......... oh...... . .. . . ... OH!

When they finally arrange a date for the "private tour", Usopp keeps an open mind, trying to see if he really WAS flirting. But then they get to the half-assed self portraits Usopp made of himself and, honestly - Usopp never wanted to show them. He wasn't all that good-looking, he didn't like how they turned out, he hadn't put in any effort and most of them were more reminiscent of grotesque caricatures than the usual realistic beauty he was used to painting.

"They're not really - I mean I mostly made them out of boredom, I- I don't really like them and- and-" He tried to excuse himself, but when he looked at Sanji, he lost all his words. The blond was looking at the paintings and sketches with such awe and sympathy. He reached out to the painted face, the tips of his fingers barely grazing the surface.

He looked back at Usopp, causing his breath to catch in his throat.

"You're far too mean to yourself." Sanji said, faint, barely audible. His eyes widened slightly as the words escaped his lips as if he didn't mean to let them slip.

On instinct, the deep-rooted self-loading Usopp had harboured all these years bubbled just the slightest. "Haha, or maybe not enough."

But then Sanji turned to him seriously, lips in a thin line, a bit hurt. "In... in an interview you once said you're glad the public liked your art, because you wouldn't bare sharing a piece of your soul and seeing anyone insult the man who's haunted your dreams." A stuttering breath. "So, I'd like to request you don't insult the man from mine..."

Oh...

[bloodiedrogue]

FIGURE YOU OUT (1)

SUMMARY: As Spider-Man's older sister it's your responsibility to make sure he comes home no matter the state. It's also your responsibility to question strangers who claim to be versions of him from other dimensions.

PAIRING: Miguel O'Hara & Female Reader

WORD COUNT: 7,793

WARNINGS: Angst, enemies-to-lovers adjacent (if that makes sense???), minor descriptions of injury, heavy alcohol use, mention of vomiting, inappropriate language.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: OKAY SO this was originally supposed to be a hefty one shot but after much consideration I've decided it's going to read best as a series so you're getting not one but three parts! Hopefully y'all like it 'cause this is my first time writing for Miguel and I'm kind of nervous? :')))

CHAPTER LIST / NEXT CHAPTER / MASTERLIST

-

 “May, for the millionth time I’m not—“

Before you can even finish, Aunt May’s hands are on her face, pushing on the frustrated expression that laces through her features. She’s annoyed, as per usual. Exhausted, just like the pale and veiny hands that rest beneath the dimness of your dining room light, pulling at wrinkled skin. 

“I just think he’d be good for you, you know? Harry’s nice and attractive and—”

“Norman Osborn’s son?”

“Okay, but it’s not like the boy’s anything like his father.”

“That you’re aware of.”

She opens her mouth, a small huff releasing straight from her chest, knowing already you’ll never budge. You’re too stubborn like your father —like her nephew who so effortlessly had a counter for every argument he wound up tangled in. Like you, he’d fight to the death for every little thing and she knows it, causing her to merely frown. 

“Fine, fine but just know you’re missing out. He’s a real catch.”

You scrunch up your face, resisting the urge to gag knowing how much May chastises you for being childish. You’re an adult now, act like it! You practically hear the words echoing through your mind as you reach for the glass of wine in front of you, gripping the stem tightly as you take a huge gulp.

“Okay then, if not Harry, are there any other men?”

You almost cough into your glass, unprepared to answer. Sure there were men. Here and there you’d had some dates and flings and almost, maybe boyfriends. You played the field like any other twenty-something woman in Brooklyn trying for their shot at love by going out to bars or hopping on dating sites. Like everyone else, you scrolled through the endless faces and bios, picking and choosing your fave ones; having moments of is this the one with far too many boys who turned out to be nothing more than just a memory.

So yes and no, you decide, telling May the latter, knowing if you choose the former she’ll get too excited and start asking questions.

“You know you’re not getting any younger, kid.” 

“I know.” 

You also know that you should be offended. You should be pissed off or annoyed —any sort of negative emotion but all you feel is exhaustion, considering you have this conversation at least once a week. Sometimes twice if you have to drop by May’s or the shelter. 

Every time she sees you it’s as if she needs to put this pressure on you. To throw this burden on your shoulders so that she isn’t the only one thinking of it. Because if you’re thinking about it maybe you’ll do something about it, right?

“You should find someone to love —to settle down with.”

You want to. More than she knows. It’s lonely here in New York, living in your busted-up one-bedroom apartment with a brother who’s never around. Day in and day out you’re forced into a space of solitude you never asked for, moving aimlessly from bedroom to subway car to office and back again. 

It’s not ideal, especially when you have to watch Peter and his double life. Sure, it’s stressful —a burden sometimes more often than not, but at least it’s exciting. At least there’s substance.

“I think I’m gonna head to bed soon. The lab needs me early for testing,” you lie, smiling tiredly, hoping that May won’t notice. 

This time she doesn’t. Or at least, she feels worn down enough not to ask questions. A fact you’re thankful for as she nods her head and kisses your face, saying her usual goodbye before scurrying out the front door with a wave. 

When she’s gone you let out a heavy breath, running your fingers through the roots of your hair. You’re not sure how long you can keep living this way. Flowing from place to place like an aimless ghost. It hurts too much knowing all the potentials. All the crazy things waiting for you just outside your door. More than anything you want to experience them —to live them just like Peter. 

Secretly, you think you want to be like Peter. To be looked at —adored or hated, it doesn’t matter. Desperately, you want a pair of eyes to look at you as something other than you: a tired lab assistant just trying to survive. You want someone to see you, to know your worth in a way that doesn’t involve Petri dishes or DNA swabs. 

You want to feel needed, you decide. Not in a life-changing way per se. More needed in the sense of being someone’s first choice like MJ is for Peter. To have that one person you can rely on and vice versa no matter the circumstance. A ride or die. 

The thought makes you groan into the base of your hands as you pull at your roots, the vibrations against your skin making you pull away. It’s only eight and, embarrassingly enough, you’re ready for bed, your body weighing down in the chair you currently reside in. Already your eyes are starting close, their function slowing decreasing by the second as you reach for your glass of wine and down the rest in one gulp.

It’s disgusting but regardless you pour yourself another, already knowing you’ll need it to actually go to bed. 

You don’t sleep well when Peter’s out.

Blinking tiredly you pull your phone out of your pocket and shoot him a quick text. Are you good?

You don’t expect an answer but still worry when you don’t get one, causing your body to twitch as you continue to sit, downing glass after glass until the bottle’s empty and your head starts to feel like it’s swimming through molasses. 

By then it’s nearing nine. The lights of the city shine brightly through your window as you blink and rub your eyes, taking one last dizzy glance at your phone to see that Peter’s replied. 

He’s fine. What’s your address?

Scrunching up your face, you stare at the words in front of you, sounding out each letter so many times that it begins to blur in your mind. He’s fine, you read, knowing for a fact that Peter would never talk about himself in the third person. 

He’s not that weird.

Quickly, you disregard your rule of no phone calls in favour of answers, listening to the dial tone for a good minute before the other end crackles to life and a sigh pushes through. 

“Pete, what the fuck are you talking about?” 

You can feel your older sister instincts kicking in. Every worrying thought pushes itself through your brain right out of your ears to make room for a rage you haven’t felt in forever. Almost instantly it burns you from the inside out, attacking your chest with hot, heavy beats that have you standing from your chair and moving towards the front door in a rush.

As you do, the voice on the other end mumbles something you don’t quite catch, prompting you to yell. 

“Excuse me? Who are you? And why do you have my brother’s phone?”

“My name doesn’t matter.”

It’s a man on the other line. An older one that sounds almost as angry as you.

“Listen here, pal, I swear to god if you don’t tell me—“

“Peter’s fine. He’s a little banged up but we’ve got it under control. Just give us your address and—“

“We? Who’s we? What the fuck are you talking about?” 

Instead of listening to your demands he just groans again and asks for the address, making you groan right back and give it to him, too overwhelmed to care that some stranger and his friends have decided to take Peter into their mysterious hands. 

After that he hangs up the phone without a goodbye, prompting you to respond with an angry growl that has you stomping all over the house in preparation for guests you weren’t prepared for. 

“Stupid fucking piece of shit,” you mumble drunkenly, pacing back and forth through your small living room, unable to sit still knowing that something happened. 

Something happened and you weren’t there to help, like usual. A thought that eats you up inside every time this happens because what can you do? You can’t fight crime like he can —you don’t have powers. You can’t heal his wounds —you’re not medically trained. So really, all you can do is offer him company when MJ isn’t around and rotate his ice packs. Make him food here and there but even that’s difficult when you spend most of your days at the lab.

Essentially you’re just another useless civilian who knows too much, leaving you distraught as you sit on the sidelines, praying to whatever god there is that he arrives home safe.

Thankfully tonight they managed to answer you in some capacity. Instead of dead, he’s just badly injured and as annoyed as you are, you’re still thankful for the outcome. Still thankful for the stranger on the phone despite the angered secrecy. 

You decide when he gets here you’ll apologize for the yelling. It’s the least you can do considering he and his friends probably have to drag poor Peter’s body out of some alleyway across the city. A difficult feat you’ve done a few times over the last decade or so. 

It’s not something you’d ever wish upon anyone. Not even the grumpy stranger over the phone whose gruff voice still rings through your ears as you anxiously move towards the kitchen and open the freezer, checking to see if there are any ice packs readily available. Shuffling through the frozen goods inside, you count four as well as a large bag of frozen vegetables, deciding then that you should probably wait to see the damage before even thinking of running to the pharmacy.

Out of the two of you, you’ve always been the worrier. The one whose mind constantly races at the sign of danger. Peter’s the fight and you’re the flight, and even before he became Spider-Man it had always been that way, which makes the waiting that much harder. The anticipation of what’s to come flooding you in waves of dread that leave you too unsettled to calm down. 

Continually you pace throughout the apartment, moving from kitchen to bedroom to living room in an endless loop that has you swirling around in such a stupor you barely hear the window of your bedroom being tapped on. 

The sound confuses you at first, knowing that it’s most likely just some bird. Peter would never make them take him up the fire escape but then it gets louder —more frantic. The tapping speed doubles as you stand disorientated in the living room, narrowing your eyes as if that’ll help your ears focus.

You realize quickly that it’s a someone tapping and not a something and immediately you spring into action, rushing to your bedroom window to see a trio of bodies all dawned in spider suits of their own. 

It leaves you breathless but still active as you push up the window, breathing out heavy breaths as you watch the smallest of the three —a lithe spider with pink webs stained over white— bound into the room to help pull Peter inside. 

“What took you so long?” 

It’s the voice from the phone, grumbling from the fire escape. He’s taller than the others —thicker. His suit black and red with an emblem that fills his broad chest with bold lines that drape down the front of his arms.

“Give her a break man, she’s probably scared to death.” 

Beside him, another Spider-Man whose suit looks more like Peter’s stands. Both of them grip your brother’s lower half, gently passing them over to the spider in your bedroom, prompting you to rush over to help.

“What the hell happened?”

He’s worse than you’d like to admit. The majority of his mask has been ripped apart. One of his eyes is completely uncovered, blooming with fresh bruises that cause it to swell almost completely shut. On his cheek, he’s got a pretty huge gash along with a few others around his chin and throat.

Immediately, tears begin to form at the corner of your eyes as they all move to lay him on the bed, making sure to be as gentle as possible. 

“It doesn’t matter what happened. What matters is he’s safe. Let’s go.” 

You turn to stare at him —the one who’s already caused you enough grief to last a lifetime. Angrily, you narrow your eyes, fighting the urge to yell as you watch his friends simultaneously shake their heads. 

“Seriously, man?”

“Miguel, you can’t just leave her with this.” 

They speak in unison, both of them matching your unimpressed response as you move in closer, pressing a finger to his chest. “I swear to god if you don’t tell me what happened I’ll kick your ass faster than you can say—“

He pinches the bridge of his nose and gives in, something that feels uncharacteristic even though you’ve just met. “He got a little beat up fighting someone he shouldn’t have, alright?”

“Alright?” you scoff, glancing between the three of them. “No, not alright. Not even a little bit. What do you mean he was fighting someone he shouldn’t have?”

“What do you mean what do you mean? Am I not being clear?”

“Not really, no.” 

He huffs, loudly. A heavy plume of air pushing through his mask. You can feel it fan your face as you take a small step away, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by the newfound presence of other spider people. 

You were almost certain Peter was the only one. 

“Maybe one of us should take the reins on this?” The blue and red one asks, prompting the other to nod, motioning for him to take over despite Miguel’s silent protests. 

“Look, we uh, we’re… we’re —how do I even start this? What do you guys usually say?” 

Without missing a beat, the shortest one takes off their mask to reveal a young girl with blonde hair. She looks familiar in a way you can’t quite place, her features bold and big and full of life, giving you a weird sense of deja vu. Have you met her before, you wonder, staring at her eyes and cheeks and mouth, picking apart the details until you’ve decided you definitely have. Somewhere.  

“Hi, I’m Gwen. This is also Peter and Miguel.”

She motions them to take their masks off but Miguel doesn’t budge. Instead, he crosses his arms over his chest as Peter awkwardly peels his away, revealing a face that looks almost identical to your brother’s. 

Which obviously sends you into panic mode, seeing the somewhat distorted face of your brother on the body of someone else. It’s older —heavier, maybe. Unlike your Peter, this one’s eyes are filled with exhausted age and crow's feet. His lips are thinner and coated in a thick five o’clock shadow that takes up the lower half of his face. His figure is thicker, holding a bit of a gut but not enough to notice unless you’re staring.

“We shouldn’t be doing this,” Miguel says, but the two of them continue, moving through the conversation slowly to gauge your response. 

“Your brother isn’t the only Spider-Man,” Gwen tells you. “At least in general. In this universe he is but uh, there are lots of others which is where we’re technically from.”

You look at your brother confused, wondering if he’s always known or if this is newfound information for the both of you. If it’s new, you hope he’s okay. That once he’s awake and able to process everything that this doesn’t send him over the edge of sanity. 

He’s already hanging by a thread as it is. With family and friends and both of his jobs waiting in the wings at any given moment, the poor guy's constantly overworked. If he isn’t taking pictures for the Daily Bugle he’s studying at school or going on patrol as Spider-Man or laying on the floor in a heap of pain.

He doesn’t need any more stress.

“Listen, I appreciate you bringing him here but I think it’s probably best you guys go, yeah?” 

You smile as warmly as you can through the fog of alcohol that has you reeling. Simultaneously, you’re angry and confused —dizzy at the amount of so many new faces. You’re overwhelmed, to say the least, and knowing Peter he’ll end up the same when he wakes up. 

“Of course.” 

It’s the first time Miguel speaks with any sort of sincerity, his tone dulling down to a quiet calmness that sends a chill up your spine as you watch him fiddle with a watch-like mechanism on his wrist. 

In unison, both Gwen and Peter look at you with sombre expressions, their lips pushing into thin lines of almost disapproval as they watch you move towards your brother, completely forgetting that they’re even there. 

“Tell him if he sees anything suspicious to reach out,” Miguel adds, looking directly at you as he says it.

Cautiously, you look back and nod your head, trying to imagine the face underneath. You bet it’s old, based on the never-ending rage that it seems to radiate. He’s got the kind of attitude an old man would have, making you imagine bushy brows and forehead lines that have developed through continuous frowns. You imagine deep scars that have sat untreated for far too long. An overlay of bruises constantly decorating his frame due to misuse of the body. 

Standing next to your Peter, you imagine he’s the kind of guy who acts before he thinks. At the sign of danger, he spontaneously leaps to remedy any given situation regardless of details. He’ll do whatever it takes. 

He’s a fighter just like Peter. 

“It was nice to meet you,” Gwen waves before throwing on her mask. Old Peter does the same and even though you want to smile —to thank them for everything they’ve done, all you can do is nod and watch as Miguel presses the face of his watch, prompting an angular, orange portal to appear right in front of your window. 

The sudden presence of it somehow stirs Peter awake, prompting him to groan next to you. 

Immediately you move to his aid, kneeling near his face with concern as you press the back of your hand to his partially exposed forehead, feeling the beads of sweat that collect rubbing against your skin.

“Are you okay?”

He mumbles under his breath and moves to sit upright despite your protests. Slowly, he catches himself on the edge of the bed and swings his legs to the floor, doubling over in pain to watch as the three of them turn to face him one last time.

“You good, kid?” Old Peter asks.

“Never better,” he says back, moving to grip his stomach with his forearm, a bloodstained smile spilling across his face.

Despite the pain that’ll inevitably heal in the days to come, you know he’s being honest. Thanks to them, he’s never been better and upon hearing that you find yourself frowning, already knowing what that means. 

He wants to see them again. You imagine it’s because, in some capacity or another their appearance has made the burden of his existence easier. For once, their arrival has created a light inside him you’ve only seen one other time. It was when he finally told MJ that he was Spider-Man. 

As cliche as it was, he described it as this weight that had been lifted off his shoulders, and as you watch him smile at his new friends, you know that’s exactly how he feels now knowing that he isn’t the only one going through the motions. No longer is he the only one forced to navigate this life full of tangled webs. No, now he has friends. Partners that can aid him in the development of his career as Spider-Man. 

People that can help him better than you can.

Before they leave Miguel repeats the statement he asked you to relay to Peter. “Call if you see anymore anomalies.” It’s phrased differently. Molded in a way you’re not meant to understand, making you all the more angry as you watch them leave through the portal. 

“What does he mean by anomalies?”

Peter, now without his fellow spiders, winces as he takes off what’s left of his mask, ignoring your question in favour of repositioning himself back on the bed. Shakily, he sighs as he readjusts, trying his best not to disturb the injuries that cover his aching skin. 

“Can you at least tell me what happened?”

He’s silent for a moment, his mouth half open, unable to fully close thanks to the shiner located on the lower half of his cheek. Then, he cranes his neck towards you. “Some Doc Ock from another universe showed up,” he tells you, his voice low. “I was in the middle of dealing with a robbery when he showed up out of nowhere and caught me off guard.” 

You swallow hard, watching him lick his lips. They’re dry and cracked and covered in old blood that makes you want to cry because you hate seeing him like this. So tired and broken. 

“He didn’t look like our Doc. He was skinnier —younger. And his tech was completely different. He kept talking about me, or I guess his version of me and I was so confused.”

“Mhm.”

“He got me a couple times. Threw me around but then they showed up and I guess sent him back home. I don’t know, by then I’d blacked out.”

His story is easy enough to follow but still leaves you with questions. How did this Doc Ock jump into your universe? Did he have one of those bracelets? Did Peter have one? And if so, has he too gone to different universes?

The urge to bombard him with every single thought that races through your mind settles as you hear his strained breath, reminding you he’s in pain. Quickly, it resets the order of important tasks in your brain, sending you flying towards the kitchen to grab every ice pack you own and start stacking them along Peter’s wounds. 

Carefully you place one along the huge gash on his face, moving his hand to hold it steady before moving to his chest and placing one on either side of his ribs. 

“Are you okay? Like actually, no lying.” 

“Yeah, are you?”

You’re not. Not in the slightest. In fact, if it weren’t for the state he was in you’d be screaming by now, demanding more answers. Something he knows by the way you curtly nod your head instead of speaking. 

“I’m sorry, Miguel can be a lot.” 

Like always, it’s as if he’s read your mind, making you roll your eyes and scoff. “Are you friends with that guy?”

“Not really. I’m only really friends with Peter and Gwen. Everyone else are kind of like coworkers. They’re nice and we get along but aside from work we don’t keep much contact.”

“Aside from like, anomaly stuff?”

“Yeah.” 

It’s weird to uncover such a big secret from your own brother. He’s never been the type to keep things to himself, at least with you. So why this? Why them? 

“Can I ask you something?” 

“Sure, but make it quick I’m about to fall asleep.” 

“Why didn’t you tell me about them?”

If it weren’t for the pain radiating through his shoulder you’re almost certain Peter would’ve responded with a shrug. A wordless movement of uncertainty that he instead replaces with a soft I don’t know that has you imagining Miguel and his idiotic mask telling him to keep his mouth shut.

“Was it Miguel?” 

It’s an uncomfortable statement to say out loud —an even more uncomfortable one to have confirmed as you watch Peter nod his head, a guilty expression plastered over his face. It makes you feel almost guilty yourself as you try your best not to explode at the thought of some asshole telling your brother what to do. At the thought of him controlling what he can and cannot tell you about his life. 

You wonder if it’s illegal for regular people like you to universe hop. It probably is but that doesn’t stop you from imagining a world where it isn’t anyway. A world where you rush through a portal of your own to find Miguel on the other side.

You’d give him a piece of your mind if you could, scold him for ever thinking he could keep such a broad existence a secret. You’d push that stupidly broad chest with all your force and tell him what’s what. That no matter how important he is amongst the spiders, you’re still Spider-Man’s sister and deserve the right to know what’s going on. 

“He’s not all bad, you know.”

Giving him an unimpressed look, you watch as he smiles, a small laugh pushing through his lips. 

“No, I’m serious. Sure, he’s a little rough around the edges but he means well.” 

“How so?” 

You’re unconvinced but still curious. Who wouldn’t be after discovering the existence of other universes? 

“He cares about people in his own way. Kind of like you.”

“Me?” 

Should you be offended? 

“What I mean is, he’s only mean because he cares like you. You guys have that same intensity.”

You scrunch up your face. “I’m not intense.” 

Peter snorts as he rolls onto his side, hugging one of the ice packs as he moves to direct his back towards you, thus signalling the end of the conversation. 

“Yeah, okay. Whatever you say, sis.”

-

Peter isn’t answering your texts and it’s starting to stress you out. 

Across from you, Harry and Gwen sit chatting amongst themselves, sipping on what’s most likely their fourth or fifth drinks based on the way they’re leaning in and giggling as you call your brother for the ninth time.

It’s been nearly a month since the incident —two weeks since he started patrolling again— and despite knowing he never answers his phone, you’re still worried. He told you he’d be here an hour ago to escort you home. Something he always did when you got dragged out by the rest of the Oscorp staff. Being a woman, wandering the streets of New York at night wasn’t an option and even though you were technically a geneticist for a mega-corporation you weren’t about to cough up at least fifty bucks to get home, so Peter was agreed to be the next best thing. 

Or at least, he was supposed to be. 

By now you’re well past drunk. Your head is heavy and you can’t stop squirming in your chair because of how restless you feel. Your skin is hot under the fluorescents of the bar lights, their weird shade of neon pink beating down on you like a synthetic sun.

“I think we’re gonna head out,” you hear Harry say. 

You must’ve zoned out because both he and Gwen are already standing, grabbing their coats off the back of their chairs with grins too big to be deemed anything other than mischievous. 

You know immediately they’re going back to his place to fuck. It’s what always happens when Gwen drinks too much and decides that, just this once, she’ll indulge the boss's son. Unfortunately, though, this is probably the fifth time in the last year that this has happened, leaving you certain it’s more of a common occurrence than she lets on. 

“Is Pete still coming to get you?” Gwen asks.

You nod your head, unwilling to admit that he probably isn’t. That instead of flying through the air you’ll most likely be forking over way too much money to sit in some dingy car that smells like piss. 

“Okay, text me tomorrow. Let’s go for brunch!”

The two of them leave hand-in-hand, a detail that doesn’t go unnoticed as you continue to stare, trying to decide how the hell all of that started. It’s not like they’re friendly to each other. At work, Gwen is constantly complaining about Harry’s silver-spoon upbringing. Talking about how privileged he is despite her dad being the police commissioner.

A detail you’re always tempted to bring up, knowing that neither of them has ever truly known what it's like to struggle. Having grown up in big houses with paid tuitions and a never-ending family to love, their lives are completely separate from yours.

It’s why you resent them so much, you think, because growing up, you and Peter never had that. When you were young your parents abandoned you with May and Ben, falling off the face of the earth soon after. Back then you always wondered why but now you know it’s because they weren’t ready. They were young and in love and despite thinking they wanted to extend that love into children, it became quickly obvious they’d made a mistake. A mistake May offered to fix.

You liked May but she wasn’t your mom. Same with Ben. As time went on, you let them think they were your real parents, listening to them when they gave you advice; following their rules so long as you lived under their roof. You didn’t call them mom or dad but you respected them as if you did. At least up until Ben died and Peter got powers and everything got sort of complicated after that. 

And since then, it continued to be complicated. Each year that passed, something new and strange always happened, leaving you there to try and pick up the pieces. 

Most of it always involved Peter. Peter becoming Spider-Man; Peter nearly dying to Doc Ock; Peter nearly dying to Vulture; Peter nearly getting infected by Venom. It was like clockwork year after year, tending to the needs of your brother while trying to live a normal life. 

You couldn’t imagine how he felt. Sure, things were hard for you but for him? God, it must be hell.

Which is why you feel so guilty for phoning him. He’s probably busy dealing with some more important shit like stopping murders or break-ins or maybe even more anomalies. 

You really hope he’s not dealing with the last one. Because if he is it means Miguel’s in town. 

God, you hate that guy.

After the incident, Peter updated you on pretty much the whole anomaly thing. Apparently, in another dimension, there was this headquarters where spider people from all over the universe came to report various issues with their home worlds. 

Overall, the details were a bit confusing —you remember Peter saying something about them being a secret society and that Miguel was their leader but not much else stuck because honestly after that you sort of zoned out. At least until he mentioned that he was officially a part of it all, earning himself his own little watch. 

Upon hearing that, a part of you was proud. A much bigger part though, was skeptical, considering your immediate distrust of Miguel. In that one meeting alone he was rude and weird and you didn’t want Peter hanging out with him.

Not that you had any say, because Peter does what Pete does and that’s fine even though he can be a little bit too trusting —the kind of guy that always sees the good in people. Opposite to you, his trust is extended to whoever, whenever which you know is what ultimately makes him a good Spider-Man. People see that and immediately think of safety —of security in a situation that otherwise isn’t.

As a true New Yorker, you trust no one. Not even the guy that steals the seat across from you with a smile. 

“You here alone?” 

Your phone is still pressed to your ear as you stare him down, the line continuously ringing over and over and over again until it goes to voicemail and you lazily repeat the process. As you do, you continue to pay little mind to the man in front of you, merely watching him glance around the building, a glass of beer tucked tightly in his hand. 

“You calling your boyfriend?”

“Nope” 

“Girlfriend?”

You shake your head and he grins in the way that hyenas do when they’ve found fresh meat. Under the bar lights, his teeth look malicious and jagged, taunting you in a way that makes you internally nervous but externally confident. 

On the outside, you do your best impression of someone brave. Someone like Peter or even Miguel. Your forehead scrunches to form unimpressed lines, your eyes narrowing to match the way your lips tightly push together. 

Across from you, the man continues to grin despite this, looking you up and down and up again with a fire so fully lit inside his eyes you can already feel the oncoming burn.

You hang up and decide to call May. It’s a last resort, knowing that once that phone rings even once you’re in for an earful. You shouldn’t be out so late, kid, you know better! 

Even though you’re in your mid-twenties May still chastises you about the dangers of the city. Working with those less fortunate, you assume it’s because she’s seen some shit. The city’s a fucked up place as you know from both her and Peter but it’s not like you’re unprepared to handle it. You always have a plan! A getaway or an escape route. It’s not your fault that tonight’s plan accidentally fell through.

As you go through your contacts to click on May’s number another body takes the seat next to you. 

“Hey, sorry I’m late.”

The voice sounds nicer than you remember, almost pleasant despite who it’s attached to. Awkwardly, you lock your phone and turn to look, noticing the unfamiliar features of a man you’ve grown to hate. 

Damn it, he’s attractive. And not nearly as old as you imagined him. He’s probably mid-thirties tops, you guess, surveying the texture of his tanned skin. It’s nice. Not as aged as Old Peter’s but you can see some of the same lines around his eyes as he glances between you and the man across.

“Can I help you?”

Miguel’s expression says it all. Fuck off. You can see it in the way his dark brows pinch towards the top of his long nose, showcasing his anger. The kind that’s almost impossible to replicate, the man quickly discovers, prompting him to merely sigh and leave the table, admitting defeat.

Once he’s gone you let out a heavy breath and sink in your seat. Never in your life did you think you’d be happy to see Miguel, and yet here you are. 

“Thank you.” 

Without so much as a glance, he stands from his chair and motions to the exit with his chin. Like usual, he’s got an air of arrogance you can’t quite stand, leaving you annoyed again as you roll your eyes and grab your coat off the back of your seat. 

He’s halfway out the door by the time you catch up to him. Your head, still drunk off the many pints of cheap beer you’d downed throughout the night, sloshes through the crowded room until it smacks dab right into Miguel’s back, prompting him to turn with a glare. 

“C’mon, let’s get you home,” he says. 

Despite wanting to, you don’t protest. Instead, you just follow him out of the building and down the street where he cuts into an abandoned alleyway and stops, checking on you with concerned eyes. 

“If I didn’t already know you were also Spider-Man I’d definitely be freaked out right now,” you say, trying your best not to slur as you lean against the wall of one of the buildings. The brick feels cool against your face.

“How much did you drink in there?” 

“At least five but probably more?”

“Five what?”

You shrug. There’s a moment of silence after that. One where you can feel your eyes fluttering in and out of focus, watching the way Miguel places his hands on his hips and stares you down. 

You can tell that he hates you now, officially. What once was merely a single conversation gone bad has turned to two which means you’re now considered a burden. A problem.

His problem. 

“I’m going to assume that travelling by air is a no-go,” he says; sighing because it means he’s probably going to have to walk you home.

Which you’re sure he doesn’t want to do considering he’s in charge of all the spider people. He’s probably got better things to do than to walk home his employee’s sister. 

“Where’s Peter?”

You’re on the move again before you know it, walking at Miguel’s side, watching the way he shoves his hands into the pockets of his jeans. 

“He’s out with the others. Another anomaly showed up when you called. He was busy so he asked me to come get you.” 

“Why’d he ask you?” 

Unfortunately for both of you, your filter is absolutely obliterated. Gone with the drinks you’d downed throughout the night. Every aspect of the embarrassment you’d usually feel right now is gone, your innermost thoughts quickly bubbling to the surface like the head of your last beer. 

Miguel, realizing this, shrugs it off and continues walking. Every so often he has to stop to make sure you’re alright —you are most of the time, but every third or fourth time you begin to slow he watches as you double over knowing that you’re probably going to throw up. 

“You good?”

Slowly you crawl to the ground until you’re on all fours, your hands gripping the edge of the sidewalk despite knowing how dirty it is. Beneath your palms and it’s cold and damp from the rain, prompting you to gag even harder because that means there’s probably mud on your hands. Dirty, gross mud from the bottom of people’s shoes. 

You feel a hand on your back. Carefully, it rubs a line back and forth along your spine, causing you to inhale and exhale and focus on the sudden calmness of his voice. 

“You’ll probably feel better if you just let it out.” 

“Mhm.”

“I know it’s gross but I promise it’s nothing I haven’t seen before.”

As if he’s blessed you with the promise of no judgement, you vomit on the ground, feeling your throat burn with the familiar acidity. As you recover, he continues to rub your back in long, slow movements, making you thankful that at this moment he doesn’t hate you.

Or at least, he chooses not to show it. 

“Thank you, again,” you mumble. 

This time he at least nods, acknowledging your words as he helps pull you to your feet, giving you one final pat on the back before you continue to walk in silence.

-

Miguel insists on staying until Peter’s back, despite your protests. 

His face, heavy with exhaustion looks at you, unwilling to budge on the matter as he pushes himself through the door. “Peter told me to take care of you,” he tells you. “So I’m gonna do that, okay? End of story.”

Now that you’re somewhat sober from the long walk home, you can feel all the hatred you have for him flowing through your system. Sure, he may have walked you home —comforted you in a difficult time but he’s still a dick. Under that sympathetic Spider-Man act he’s still the man that makes you want to scream every time Peter mentions him.

“Fine, but the second you hear anything from Peter you have to tell me.” You wag your finger at him intensely as you wander to the kitchen, feeling your mouth begin to dry up from the amount of water you’ve managed to avoid all night. 

“Fine!”

“Fine!”

He sits on the couch without another word, pulling up the sleeve of his shirt. Underneath, his watch emits a warm toned glow, prompting you to look over as he presses the face revealing a small hologram lady. 

“Wow, so nice of you to finally drop by! What’d you do, take her out for more drinks?”

Miguel groans and leans back into the couch, his body practically melding into the cushions. “Is there any news about the anomaly?” 

The woman crosses her arms over her chest and gives him a look —one you can’t quite place as she pulls the pink-heart glasses down the bridge of her nose. “I’ll tell you but only if you tell me how your night went.” 

Her voice is full of mischief, causing Miguel’s head to practically smack into the back of your couch, his eyes finding refuge in the ceiling. He’s embarrassed, you realize then. Probably because instead of being the superhero like everyone else he was demoted to babysitter. 

“The night was fine. She threw up, we walked home, end of story. Update, please.”

“We walked home, huh?” She wiggles her brows and darts around, the light from the watch moving around to get what you assume is a better look at your apartment. “Is she there?”

Even though his head is still hung uncomfortably over the edge of the couch, Miguel still manages to threaten you with his eyes. A warning you reluctantly accept as you move further into the kitchen, making sure you’re out of view.

“She’s sleeping.”

“Ooh, and did you tuck her—“

“Lyla, can I please just get an update?” 

You’ve never heard him so defeated. So tired. It’s like all the fire inside of him has suddenly burnt out and all that’s left is the remnants of ash. His eyes are almost closing without warning, threatening to cut him off from the outside world as Lyla tells him about someone named Hobie and how he’s with your brother. 

Apparently, they’re on Earth-58163. Another universe you know nothing about and probably never will because Peter refuses to talk about it. He always tells you it’s too complicated to explain —too intricate. “If I tried, it’d probably break your brain,” he tells you, brushing off the conversation time and time again. 

It’s annoying in a way that makes you feel like you’re kids again, the child-like jealousy overthrowing your desire to be a good person and just drop it. You need to know more. To understand how this all works so that you’re not just some outsider looking in like usual. 

When you hear Miguel say goodbye to Lyla you practically sprint over to the couch and plop down beside him, deciding that if Peter won’t tell you, you’ll go right to the source. 

“What’s your universe like?” 

There’s still a buzz sitting at the back of your brain, egging you on to set aside your differences in favour of answers. 

“That’s classified.” 

“Classified? Are you serious?”

“Yes, that’s why I said it?”

He doesn’t understand that you’re making fun of him. Or, at least, if he does, he refuses to comment.

“Peter never tells me anything about you guys.” You sink into the couch like Miguel, your arms resting limply on either side of you. “It’s not fair.” 

“Life’s not fair, niña.” 

You scrunch up your face. “I’m not a kid, old man.” 

“Are you under the age of thirty?” He raises his brow. 

“Yes.” 

“Niña.” 

There’s a moment where you think about reaching over and smacking him in the face. Just a small, lightly placed tap, similar to the one you give Peter when he’s being annoying, but immediately you retract such thoughts knowing he’d probably just yell at you. 

“Just because I’m younger than you doesn’t mean I’m a kid.”

“No but it means other things.”

“Like?”

His head turns to face you, his cheek half pushed into the backing of the couch. “That you’re inexperienced.”

“I’ll have you know I’m actually very experienced.”

“That’s what someone inexperienced would say.” 

“Says the guy who runs a secret society of spider people and still manages to get benched for the night.”

You expect him to yell at you then. To suddenly uproot himself from the couch and give you the kind of lecture May would but instead he just snorts and shakes his head, moving to rest the back of his head on the couch again. 

It confuses you if you’re honest. You don’t know Miguel in the slightest, but based on what you’ve heard you assume he’s the kind of guy who harbours a high temper and an unrealistic demand of respect. A boss in every aspect of his life. Because of this, you assume he can’t take a joke. That he doesn’t understand the concept of teasing or banter because his ego takes it too seriously. 

It throws you a bit, your mind suddenly questioning all your previous opinions. You suppose then it isn’t fair to judge him so harshly. Considering the job title, he’s probably under a lot of stress. With such a high volume of people looking to him for guidance, it’s more than likely Peter’s right. He’s not that bad. 

“Okay, well, if you won’t tell me about your universe because you think I’m inexperienced will you tell me about you?”

He’s silent. Or at least dormant, his breath steadily flowing as he slides further and further into the couch. You can tell then that his body is hanging by a thread of consciousness, subtly stirring in pace with his breathing. Slowly, his chest rises and falls, pushing his elbows in tandem as his mouth begins to fall open, making you yawn. 

It’s probably best you go to bed too, you decide, considering the only reason you’re still awake is to get information. If your informant is out cold there’s no sense in prolonging the inevitable, so instead of delaying you quietly stand and stretch your back. Loudly, it cracks, creaking with an age you’re certain now that Miguel would chastise you for. “You’re too young to be creaking like that,” he’d probably say. 

Another yawn filters through as you wander over to your bedroom and grab an extra blanket, throwing it over your shoulders like a shawl as you walk back to Miguel. 

“What are you doing?”

His voice scares the shit out of you, making you jump and embarrassingly let out a shocked squeal, your heart pounding violently in your chest. 

He’s still frozen in place but this time his eyes are half-opened, looking at you with interest. 

“Getting you a blanket.” 

“I don’t need a blanket.” 

“Okay, well, I didn’t know that? I’m not a mindreader.” 

“Why not?”

He may not be Peter Parker in his universe but he certainly retains the same sarcasm, leaving you annoyed as you tear the blanket off and toss it onto his head. 

“Goodnight, old man.” 

“Goodnight, niña.”

-

TAGGING: @fandxmslxt69 (if you'd like to be added fill out this form)

[pricegouge]

Flawless Victory, my goofy submission for @ghouljams King Killer Challenge

Gaz x reader // cw for slightly graphic depictions of Mortal Kombat fatalities.

That's right. I put that motherfucker in MK1.

"New MK DLC tonight, babe," you sing. "Ready to get your ass beat?"

Kyle waggles his brows at you, the dirty dog. "Lemmie go get the paddle."

"Way ahead of you." You laugh when he frowns at the controller you place in his hand.

"Clever, luv. Alright, let's see what we got."

Nothing too good as it turns out. Most new characters are old wash ups from worse games, one new action hero. You're googling if Reptile will have any good alt looks when Gaz comments on one of the few truly new characters.

"König. Special ops," he reads blandly and you glance up at the hooded character's minimal bio displayed on screen. 

"Just like you, babe."

"Yeah… had enough of those blokes," he grins, moving onto Ermac.

"Well, I like the boys." Moving your own cursor over to König, you spin him around like a little ballerina for your inspection. "Like this cat's hood, too. Looks like an executioner."

Kyle selects Kitana cause he's got a massive crush. "Maybe that'll be his fatality."

"Metal," you cheer sarcastically as you wait for the load screen. Kyle shuts you up with a kiss.

You don't get to find out König's finishing move that round. You barely get to find out any of his moves at all. You know he's got a gun; it's about the only thing that keeps Kyle's flawless victory away, and when Kitana puts your guy through her blender sandwich, you gape in shock at the screen.

"Is that the first time you've won?"

It is but he would never admit it, elects instead to tease, "No wonder you love this game."

"Alright, round two." Pulling Kyle's hat off, you place it backwards on your own head, all business. 

"Sore loser."

"Yep!"

You refuse to check the move list as a point of pride, spend the time it takes Kyle to select Raiden giving your little guy a pep talk instead.

It doesn't do much good, not even a matter of minutes before Raiden slams the two sections of König's bisected body together like that stupid fucking toy monkey with it's cymbals.

"Goddamnit! Again!"

It's no use. König gets both his cool hood and his face ripped off by Geras's sandpaper storm. He get his skull cross sectioned by Johnny Cage's Hollywood star. Kung Lao cuts that mother fucker asunder and he gets throat fucked by Kenshi's samurai sword. Nothing works. You even check his move list, spend three rounds dedicating yourself to mastering basic low attacks. The big bastard just cannot manage anything more than a few gunshots.

When Ashra rains holy blades down on him you resort to button mashing, get Nitara's chest burster bats for your troubles in the next round. 

"Sure you don't wanna call it a night, luv?"

"I will win," you seethe. You flip Gaz's hat around rally cap style and select König's stupid thumbnail with a reluctant grimace.

It almost works. You mash buttons so quick your fingers look like they're playing DDR. You bob and you weave, leaning into Kyle's space as if it'll make König's range attack quicker. You pull out every stop in the book and get Li Mei on the ropes -

Only to have her rip König's small intestine out and light it like a fucking dynamite wick, kicking his head off so the spark travels cartoonishly up the length of his digestive system to blow in his suspended mouth. 

"That's it, I quit!" you shriek, throwing your paddle down onto the coffee table rather childishly.

Kyle just sits there stunned. "Was trying to let you win."

"I don't wanna hear it!" You huff, taking a moment to collect yourself and giving him a grin when you feel less like a petulant teen. "Did you ever remember where that paddle is? If I'm gonna get my ass beat tonight, I at least wanna have some fun."

[ellisgirlfriend]

my only one

dealer!ellie x reader

summary: loneliness always scared her, always made her cry at night when the moon was shining bright. She needed a change, someone who can fill her loneliness, lucky for her.. you were there.

cw: swearing, homophobia, the d slur, ellie being an emotional mess, mentions of drugs and alcohol

wc: 3.653

It really did become a habit of hers, writing her deepest thoughts in that messy diary, she only hoped no one would open it because, to be honest, she couldn’t even remember what she wrote in the past. That thought made her shiver from her cringy past self and the drunken nights she had crying in her empty bed.

Out of nowhere, the empty room was welcomed by a warm presence, Ellie looked up, still confused to her surroundings until she had received a soft smile from the girl. She felt a bit embarrassed, being caught like this, writing in that stupid diary of hers like an eleven year old. Trying to change the atmosphere, Ellie began to speak in a quiet voice:

“hello to you too, smartass. Don’t know how to knock?”

She wasn’t in the mood for any more conversations, she really wasn’t trying to be rude to her roommate , really, but after a long day surrounded only by frat boys, begging her for free weed every 5 minutes, it was really getting to her.

“Hmm, didn’t mean to, just wanted to check up on you.” her roommate said in a more serious tone, waiting for Ellie to respond while moving slowly around her room, admiring her drawings that hung on her dirty walls. She began to shift uncomfortably, this girl wasn’t just a random roommate that she luckily was assigned with, she was her dearest friend and unfortunately for her, she could read Ellie like an open book.

“Uh…”

Ellie said in a small voice, tired from being asked the same questions all over again, she was okay, at least she hoped so. She didn’t want to cause any problems with her stupid feelings that haunt her every night, her roommate looked at her from the corner of her eye, analyzing her every move while trying to get closer to the fragile girl sitting in the broken chair.

“Hey, seriously Ellie, talk to me for fuck's sake. I’m done seeing you like this.”

“Like what, Dina?” she finally raised her voice, making Dina twitch.

“Don’t play dumb, you always sit in your room, you don't even talk to me anymore!" Dina sighed, looking anywhere but in Ellie’s eyes, feeling embarrassed for being so emotional.

“At least…tell me what’s going on, please.”

Ellie looked at Dina, feeling even more embarrassed by now, she was so dramatic for no reason it made her slightly sick to her stomach.

“I'm just tired y’know, doing the same thing all over again. I…just feel lonely, I suppose.” she was trying to look somewhere else while pouring her heart out the best she could, Dina looked at her with warm eyes, trying to understand her. After a while, Ellie finally looked in Dina’s eyes, trying to apologize with her gaze, Dina stopped her with a soft smile. “You know, feelings are hard, it’s not unusual to feel like this, Ellie.” Dina touched her long, slender fingers and sighed deeply, “I know that after the…Cat situation…” she stopped, looking at Ellie trying to get an approval from her eyes, Ellie slightly smiled. “..after the Cat situation, every romantic relationship became hard for you to deal with but, Ellie, you deserve way better than that girl.”

After a while of Dina comforting Ellie, she finally convinced her to install some cheap-looking dating app. It was a start, I guess? Since Ellie didn’t really have the energy to go out other than to sell weed to gross looking dudes. It took her a while to choose a decent photo of her without Cat in it, it made her tremble, remembering the sweet moments she shared with the short haired girl but ignored it, finishing her profile. It looked good enough, she thought. Her profile was very simple, to say the least, with only two photos and a short bio with her age and location. She really didn’t have high hopes and to be honest, she didn’t even want to do it that much. But she knew Dina will nag her about using the app, trying to make her feel better. Ellie smiled thinking about this, she really appreciated Dina for being such a good friend.

Out of nowhere, her phone softly vibrates in her hands, looking up, Ellie sees the notification, someone was trying to send her a message. Man…this wasn’t good, her hands were already sweating, it was hard talking to a new person, with the romantic intentions in mind…it’s been so long for her. She tried to calm down and with a single tap, the app opened, greeting her with a simple “hey:)”. Such a simple yet hard message to answer to. Ellie tried to be smooth about it, putting on a flirty act, it was a common thing, trying to impress the pretty girls with her fake confidence. It made her feel good about herself, almost making her forget about how insecure she is when it comes to relationships.

“hey pretty.”

You clenched the phone in your hands, this was nerve-racking, such a beautiful girl calling you pretty had you on your knees already. It was a stupid idea to install this app, you thought, but you couldn’t even flirt with a girl without fainting afterwards. It was a dramatic thing to say, but you weren’t joking, not even a little bit, the main reason being that you are not…out yet, and it scared the shit out of you so talking, maybe flirting with such a girl made you feel weird, to say the least.

“i just wanted to talk, so I messaged you!” so cheesy, you thought

Ellie smiled, feeling a bit more confident with herself, you were a shy one, but that still didn’t make Ellie completely nonchalant, before answering she checked your profile and that scared her even more now, you were just breathtaking. Your hair looked so soft, your lips were so...kissable. She shook her head, trying to control her stupid hormones, she was weak to pretty girls, that’s why she was scared to start a new relationship, a new something. It was dangerous territory for her, from getting hurt like the last time. After a minute, she exited from your profile, she didn’t really want to keep you waiting so she tried to type a message fast without even thinking, that’s how her flirting worked. It was a weird feeling, almost adrenaline, from being so blunt without thinking, it made her feel dizzy.

“i feel the same.", she typed. A very short but meaningful message to make you feel even shyer, it made her smile a bit. It was obvious you were trying to type something but stopping right after, it was almost adorable.

After talking for a while, the conversation started to become comfortable, it felt like you and Ellie were meant to talk to each other, it was cheesy since it’s the first day, but you couldn’t blame yourself, you were a hopeless romantic and the fact that you were talking to such a gorgeous girl did not help the situation at all.

In two weeks, Ellie found out a lot about you, you were on the same campus. When she found out about this, an unknown feeling began to haunt her. Don't get her wrong, she was excited to perhaps, see you around campus but at the same time she was too nervous to face you. Everything was going too smoothly, she was so comfortable talking to you but…only though text at the moment. It's been so long since she was last romantically interested in someone and, man…she was so scared, she didn’t want to get hurt again, her heart wasn’t even healed from the past experience. She wasn’t trying to be rude, but her mind always went to the worst-case scenarios. You were such a sweet girl, she knew deep down that you won’t do something like that to her but still, the deep fear in her was there, haunting her to this day.

At the same time, she didn’t want to disappoint you, it was clearly easier to type something while pretending to be really confident but Ellie knew that in real life she would stutter like a bitch. In the past it would have been a lot better for Ellie, but after such a recent and messy break up, she couldn’t be so chill about it, unfortunately. She even tried to explain her situation to you, not in great detail, though, she wasn’t ready to vent her whole life to you but just enough to make sure you know who you're dealing with. When I tell you, she was so relieved when she saw your sweet message, trying to comfort her from the break up but also giving her enough space, it just made her heart melt. Her brain was sending mixed signals everytime she talked to you, it was frustrating, this feeling of being scared but also…not wanting to leave, she was careful, she didn’t want to make a mistake that could impact your...friendship, if you can call it that. She wanted to take it easy and just experience this new type of feeling, but it made her feel dizzy, it was hard just to talk to you and not feel anything, she didn’t want to rush into things and get hurt again, or even hurt you. It haunted her day and night, but my god, she was starting to like you to another level, writing in her diary about your likes, dislikes and even fun silly facts about you that you probably forgot about, every little thing about you filled her mind and she was so obsessed with it. She even wrote about places that you would like to go to, her mind making up scenarios where you two would meet, forgetting about how scared she was to even meet eyes with you. But it was a beautiful feeling, it made her feel happy to imagine all these things with you, she really hoped one day she could just go to you.

One thing about you that she would keep her mind fixed on is that you love history, always talking about it, she was confused at first, still is but nevertheless she was listening to every word you said about your major and small facts. It was such a boring subject for Ellie, especially because of the teacher, she purposely avoided that class with her whole soul, probably not passing the class but listening to you made her want to attend that stupid class. You made the subject so interesting, you made her focus on it easily, even in messages, she even began to be into this thing, searching in her free time about it, trying to impress you like a lost puppy.

A month has passed and everything was going great, Ellie was a different person, the effect you had on her was magical, even Dina was surprised that app changed her best friend so drastically, she couldn’t ask for more. She was more than happy to see Ellie back on her feet, that break up seriously ruined her and Dina couldn’t even look at Ellie without feeling bad, she really hated it, seeing her curled up in her bed ignoring everyone around her, not even attending to favorite her classes, Dina just wanted to go and hug her.

It was late at night, Dina was still thinking about the situation, patting her shoulder for being such a good friend while Ellie was moving room to room. That woke Dina from her thoughts, watching Ellie getting ready to go somewhere, it was pretty obvious she was going to some frat boys party to sell some weed since she was low on money, after that breakup she was less and less active with her weed 'business' or whatever, but at the same time, Dina was confused to see her such in a hurry, trying so many outfits, let’s say that it peaked her interest.

“Going somewhere?” Dina said, trying to hide her small smirk, Ellie turned her head to her, her eyes clearly showing nervousness, it was a bit too obvious. “Ah, just going to some party, y’know.” She tried to change her tone to seem a bit more calmer but her insides were burning, she couldn’t wait not even a bit longer, Dina looked at her, putting her whole attention on her which made Ellie shift uncomfortably, “You know you can’t lie to me, it’s all over your face.” Dina said.

“Oh whatever…” Ellie complained in an exaggerated voice, making Dina smile even harder at Ellie’s reaction. Ellie took a deep breath before finishing her sentence, “if you are that interested, I’ll go to that stupid party but…I think I’ll see her there”. Of course, it was so easy to guess, it’s been so long since Dina saw Ellie so interested in the way she looked, it was comforting to her. Ellie became Ellie again, she stood up from the comfy couch, approaching Ellie with a big smirk while she was making a disappointed face. She was telling Dina “don't you dare” with her eyes, while Dina already began to talk about all these stupid flirty scenarios that would happen tonight, it made Ellie flustered, her imagination going wild, betraying her but she still managed to keep a serious face, pushing Dina slightly, ready to leave this room before Dina began to tease her even more, plus...she couldn’t wait anymore. Her heart was beating too hard, she couldn’t ignore it anymore, she had to leave already, to see you for the first time. She didn’t know if she was ready, it’s been quite some time but still…the feeling of nervousness never left her body but at the same the excitement was growing with each second.

After a long walk, she was more relaxed, the cool air calming her warm heart. Unfortunately, she was welcomed with a strong smell of alcohol and she already wanted to leave this place and take you to that restaurant you always talked about. She was angry with herself for wanting to meet you here for the first time, in a place like this, but she needed that stupid money very fast, it was getting ridiculous at this point. Before even getting to finish her inner monologue, a group of people greeted her, already knowing who she is from her appearance. She took a deep breath before walking up to them.

Struggling to put the damn dress on, you almost gave up but after some time it finally reached your hips, you looked in the mirror, admiring yourself, trying to look extra fancy just for this mini date you planned with Ellie. You were so nervous, you didn’t even realize how late you were, there wasn’t a specific time planned but you still wanted to be there earlier just to finally see her soft features in real life, it made your heart skip a beat. Finally, you grabbed your purse and ignored your feelings for the time being, the cool air hitting your face.

Ellie was already on a couch, a bottle of alcohol in her hand, she was obviously nervous because she couldn’t see you in the big crowd. It wasn’t an official date or something but it still made her worried about your well being, she really thought you would come. Sighing, she gets closer to the girl sitting next to her on the couch. The overwhelming feeling in her stomach made her overly sensitive, especially after the whole break up situation, she really wanted to see you, it was obviously your choice if you wanted to come but still…she was feeling a bit dizzy. She didn’t know if it was the alcohol or the emotions, but she could feel your presence next to her. Ellie looked at the girl, feeling butterflies in her stomach thinking that maybe this would be the person she had been waiting for, when her eyes met with an unknown face, she sighed, trying not to make it obvious that she didn't enjoy her company anymore. She still talked to her, maybe she just wanted some joints or whatever, and she did but at the same time she was a bit too flirty with Ellie. The alcohol was making her even dizzier, she couldn’t even focus on this girl, so out of instinct she flirted back, maybe that was the alcohol or maybe the desperation you made her feel and the disappointment of you not showing up. She gave a smile to the small girl, giving her a discount, 'just for pretty girls' she said, cringing at her own words but still going with it.

The girl was ready to talk more with Ellie, but out of nowhere, a feminine voice which sounded forced covered the other girl’s. Ellie could feel a strange presence close to her, making her feel uncomfortable, she tried to move her eyes to scan the area where the voice came from, but the other person was faster, touching her hands so tenderly, it made her blush. She looked up, hoping that maybe it’s you, finally meeting you, but unfortunately, she was met with an unknown face, she looked confused at the other person, raising an eyebrow but the other person didn’t even flinch, it made Ellie frustrated but at the same time angry, who is this person?

“Can I help you?” She said in a deep voice, trying to show some confidence but the other person slowly began to speak, “Hello,my dear Ellie. I’m so glad we finally met." the person said in a high pitched voice, trying to sound different, she was beyond confused, maybe the alcohol was making her see things, she didn’t think so though, before getting a chance to speak the other person did it first “Don't you remember me? We were supposed to meet!” 'What', that was Ellie’s first thought so she just asked without even thinking “Who even are you?”. She didn’t want to sound pissed but let’s be honest, she clearly was, this person was mocking her and she couldn’t figure it out. “The fuck do you mean you don’t know bitch.” the person raised their voice, “I’m the girl you’ve talking to, duh.”

Ellie couldn’t believe her eyes, she looked at the person in front of her, this wasn’t right, at all. She began to scream “YOU’RE CLEARLY A MAN BRUH.” She couldn’t believe that she fucking got catfished, her blood was boiling through her veins. “I’m not a man, dykey. I’m clearly non-binary, respect my pronouns.” The other person said offensively, almost mocking Ellie’s angry reaction. “Oh, for fuck's sake, shut the fuck up,"She said, “you lied to me all this time, don’t you feel sorry??”

“Not really, and the fuck are you complaining about, I’m kinda cute. Stop with the pussy lover title and get here.” He said “WHAT, ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE GET AWAY” Ellie said in a deep voice trying to maintain the dominant act “At least tell me who the fuck you are so I know who I punch.” She said with her fists already clenched, she couldn’t resist anymore. “Heh, no one can punch me baby. But try your luck..” he smirked, playing with his long hair while he continued the sentence while everyone watched the scene, Ellie was clearly too loud and it caught everyone’s attention. “and I’m Zhongli, nice to meet you, little dykey flower.” Out of nowhere, everyone gasped.

"Is that Zhongli???!! From the hit game Genshin Impact?!” Everyone began to clap, this was unreal, Ellie was fucking confused. 'Zhongli? Who the fuck.' she thought. He had a smirk on his face, almost proud for being so popular, who the fuck is this guy, Ellie was fuming. She threw a punch but the dude looked her with a smile, throwing her on the floor. “You dyke.” He moved closer to her “You don’t punch daddy,my little dykey.” He smirked “Stop the act we know you’re made for cock.” Out of nowhere everyone began to scream “Yes!” Ellie was so confused, why was everyone agreeing with him? She was the infamous dealer in here , the FUCKKK. She gave these people free fucking weed at some point and now they betrayed her like this. “I'M NO COCK LOVER YOU BITCH” Ellie began to scream throwing her hands in the air, Zhongli just laughed at her, “Don’t worry baby, there is cure.” She was ready to spit on him until, suddenly, she could feel that she was flying. Confused by her surroundings, she moved her eyes to analyze, she was somewhere else…

”Huh..?” This was definitely the alcohol and the weed, oh my god. She looked up and saw Zhongli, greeting her with a smile. "Hello dykey poo, we are in Genshin Impact, Liyue, more specifically. Do you know the game?”

“No bruh I just fuck pussy and I play Butterfly Soup” she began to get angry, enough is enough. He kidnapped her , taking her in this game called Genshin Impact…? She was beyond furious. “Heh, ridiculous indie game, should have known from a stinky yuri like you.” What the fuck is he talking about . Zhongli finally dropped the bomb, “just imagine ima girl bruh. Not that hard.”

“Damn ok” Ellie said ready to kiss this mf

Sllorp

“Wow, you kiss better than my bitches”

“Told you dyke.”

Slurp

“I love you mommy…!” Ellie said, changing her mind

“Yes my baby dyke, love you too, dyke dick 😅”

“This is amazing, thank you for changing my life Zhongli, let’s stay here forever.”

“We will babe, no more break ups for you.”

Slorp she kissed him

“Thank you mommy, you’re the best women.”

“Of course el” he smiled

“Let’s be in here forever and make babies.”

“I love babys!” Ellie said

“Aw! How many do you want babe?”

“Hmm maybe three!!”

“Three sound good love” he smiles

author’s note: yep

[scarlet-witchery]

Shameless Femslash February — Day One — Lipstick

Karen/Mandy, first kiss. (ao3)

@m4ndysk4nkovich @holymurdock @lovekenney to my lovely kandy shipper friends 😘

Mandy didn't remember how they'd started hating each other. Something had happened back in grade school, and all she knew was that Karen Jackson was a bitch—and later on, a slut. Mandy was both of those things, too, but at least she owned up to her reputation. Little miss sugar candy acted like she was some fucking saint—emphasis on the fucking—and Mandy was the trashy one. Bullshit.

But then they got paired together for a group project, some bio presentation that Mandy secretly thought was kind of interesting. She couldn't say so out loud; she'd be the laughingstock of her family if it turned out she was the one Milkovich who actually liked school sometimes. And so she found herself one autumn afternoon walking up the front steps of Karen Jackson's place, greeted at the door by batty old Sheila. Sure, it might have been weird that she had to put her boots in a plastic bag, but the carpet was actually really soft under her socked feet. Even better, Mrs. Jackson offered to cook for them while they worked at the table. Mandy almost missed the anxious look that passed over Karen's face as she glanced up at her.

“We'd really like that, Mom,” Karen said, which made Sheila clap her hands in delight and putter off towards the kitchen, talking to herself about whether to make…something or other. Mandy didn't catch the name of it, but Karen asked her a question about their presentation and they moved on. As time went on and Mrs. Jackson kept cooking, though, the smells coming from the kitchen were absolutely mouth-watering.

When Sheila brought out two plates of food and sat them down in front of both girls, it looked like nothing Mandy had ever seen before. But her stomach growled loudly, and she'd learned the hard way never to turn down food when it was offered. One bite became two, and Mandy had to stop herself from scarfing down the whole thing in one go.

“Holy shit—this food is amazing,” she said through a mouthful. Sheila exclaimed happily at the compliment, and Mandy added, “All I can do is make like, eggs and sausage.” When she looked up, she saw a guarded expression in Karen's gaze before the other girl gave her a closed-mouth smile. Her lip gloss listened in the overhead lights, and Mandy felt butterflies in her stomach.

—

Even after they'd finished their project, the two of them kept finding time to hang out, usually at Karen's place. Karen came by the Milkovich house once, but Mandy lived with too many brothers and didn't feel comfortable having a girl's afternoon there. Something about the Jackson's house was easier. Quieter. A space carved out for just the two of them.

Not only that, but it seemed like Karen's mom was always cooking, and Mandy never turned down the chance to try something new. She'd never get to travel the world, but this was a little glimpse of what there was to offer. And over the weeks, those guarded looks and blank expressions Karen got whenever her mom did something a little weird began to melt away.

Mandy didn't understand the whole situation, and she didn't think it wasn't her place to ask. Everyone in their neighborhood knew batty Sheila, but honestly, Mandy would rather have a mom who was a little crazy than a drug addict like her own was—a mom who was gone more than she was around. But she never said that to Karen. Moms weren't the easiest thing to talk about, after all.

—

One day, Mandy sat in the windowsill of the girl's bathroom at school, staring out at the gloomy rain as she took a drag off a cigarette, when someone cleared their throat behind her. When she looked over, she saw Karen standing there wearing a pink zip-up jacket, her hair curly from the rain and humidity.

Karen gave her a small smile. “Got any left? I'm all out.” She pulled herself up into the window seat across from Mandy.

“Last one, but we can share.” Mandy noticed that her lipstick had left a purple stain on the cigarette paper as she handed it over to Karen, who set it between her lips and took a long drag. The feeling of Karen's fingertips against her own made Mandy's skin tingle. She tried looking out the window again, but Karen bumped their hands together, passing the cigarette back. Mandy could see where the other girl's pink lip gloss had smudged against Mandy's lipstick on the roll. The taste of cotton candy mixed with nicotine as Mandy inhaled, and she couldn't tear her gaze away from Karen's lips.

“Thanks,” Karen said when Mandy passed it back to her once more.

“No problem,” Mandy told her. What she didn't say was kiss me.

—

They were at Karen's house one Saturday afternoon—Ian said he had to work all day, and Karen told her that Lip was busy taking SATs for stupid rich kids. Mandy had thrown a bunch of her makeup and hair dye into a bag, and while she didn't exactly run to the Jackson's house, she barely managed to fight down her smile on the way over.

Karen had finally agreed to let Mandy put some purple streaks in her pretty blonde hair. “It'll piss my dad off, which makes it even better,” she said, and Mandy laughed. An old Courtney Love album blared from Karen's battered CD player as they got to work. And it was…well. Mandy had been dyeing her own hair for a few years now, but it was different doing it for someone else. Trust, for one, that she wasn't gonna fuck up. And for another, she couldn't help but appreciate the feeling of Karen's hair between her fingers. Mandy hadn't had a lot of girl friends—none who'd stuck around for very long, anyway. But Karen full on beamed at her in the mirror as Mandy covered the purple streaks with aluminum foil and clipped them up.

She let her fingers brush absently through the undyed parts of Karen's hair again, enjoying how soft and fine it felt to touch. There was nothing else, save for the sounds of old 90s grunge rock from down the hall in Karen's bedroom. Suddenly, Mandy felt her cheeks grow hot, saw Karen staring at her in the mirror, and she pulled away abruptly.

Stupid, stupid, stupid— she thought, and Karen only got up to follow her as Mandy stumbled a little out of the bathroom and back towards the other girl's room. Her head spun, and she fought the urge to break something, because these feelings wouldn't go away, and she knew what happened to Milkoviches who didn't toe the line. The shit that had gone down with her cousin Sandy last year was still ingrained in her memory.

But there was a hand on her wrist and she heard the door close, the sound of the lock turning almost deafening to her ears. Karen's fingers were small and slender as they pulled Mandy closer, turning her so she could card her free hand through Mandy's dark hair.

“It's okay,” Karen said, standing up on her toes, and all Mandy could think about when their lips met was that she tasted like cotton candy. When they pulled away she could see the soft smudges of her own pink lipstick on Karen's mouth. Karen grinned at her, hand on the back of Mandy's neck, pulling her in for another kiss, and another, until the world had narrowed down to just the two of them.

Mandy let her hand rest on Karen's hip, fingers sliding just a little bit under her t-shirt to touch the soft skin just above the waistline of her jeans. A wild thought passed through Mandy's head—what it might look like if she kissed Karen's skin all over. She was almost desperate to see how it would look if she left lipstick traces everywhere her mouth could reach.

This time, when Karen moved away to take a breath, Mandy was the one to pull her back in.

[myveryownfanfiction]

Sharpuary day 8: Scarborough

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE IN BIO DNI

tags: @illiana-mystery, @iobsessoverfictionalmen

warnings: swearing, mention of Aesop Sharp's time as an Auror and injuries

Aesop hadn’t been back since…that night. For whatever reason, he allowed me to convince him to take a small vacation to the beaches of Scarborough. Aesop busied himself with the luggage while I handled everything else. Once we were in the room though, he immediately went to the bathroom and I heard the water running. Sighing, I looked out the window at the beach.

“I know you’re worrying about me.” Aesop said as he wrapped his arms around my waist. “You don’t have to. I’m fine. I’m going to be fine.” I turned to look at him, noting the small smile and shining eyes.

“If we end up anywhere near that dock, you tell me and we’re out of there.” I said. Aesop nodded, not losing his smile. “I’m serious Aesop. You tell me.”

“I will.” He assured me before kissing me softly and dragging me out of the hotel room. That night when we had returned, I headed to the bathroom while Aesop put away everything that we had brought with us and purchased. I tried not to think too hard on what it must feel like for him to be back here, even though I did not yet know the full story. Aesop was a closed book when it came to the night he had lost his partner and gained his injuries. Turning off the water, I wrapped a towel around myself before venturing back into the main room.

"Aesop?" I said softly when I saw him sitting at the little desk, lost in thought. "Sweetheart?" Aesop looked up at me and gave me a small smile.

"Feel better?" He asked. I nodded, having gotten all the sand out of my hair. "Good." Aesop turned to look out the window and I moved to get dressed, knowing he was getting lost in his own thoughts even if he was trying to have a good time with me. "You can see the dock from here." I had just pulled my shirt over my head when Aesop spoke again. "At least I can. Sort of. Maybe I'm staring off in the direction of it since I know it should be there."

"I know what you're going to say," I said as I walked over to look out the window with him, hand on his back. "But do you want to change rooms?" I started to rub his back as I waited for his response.

"No. I don't want to be an inconvenience when I honestly am probably just imagining things." Aesop shook his head. "Besides, you deserve to know." He turned to look at me.

"I don't need to know Aesop." I whispered, watching as he opened a door in the wall he had built up. "You don't need to do this unless you want to." He smiled at me and wrapped an arm around me.

"Always looking out for me." He breathed as he kissed my head. "I want to. You know that I was cursed on that dock. I lost my partner." I nodded as I let him pull me closer. Aesop pointed out the window. "The dock should be just over there." I followed his finger and nodded as I could just make out the dock in question. "My partner was my childhood friend, Ashley. She was an even better Auror than I was. And I don't say that to be modest. She really was. We had a tip that there would be smugglers coming to that dock. They were part of a ring we had been tracking for months and this was going to be our chance to take them down. What we didn't know, or rather didn't bother trying to find out, was that they were expecting us. We don't know who tipped them off. We didn't even know who tipped off the Auror's office." He sighed and squeezed my shoulder. "A fight broke out. I thought Ashely could handle her own so I barely gave her a second thought. I was so sure we'd both get out of there. I had just finished off the last of the smugglers. Or so I thought." He ran a hand down his face. "The bastard came out of nowhere. Ashley didn't have a fucking chance. She was dead before her name even left my mouth." I tightened my hold on Aesop as he squeezed his eyes shut.

"Aesop..." I breathed out. "It's not..." He shook his head.

"I was frozen. Couldn't do anything." He breathed out. "Next thing I know I went flying back as I was cursed. Other Aurors had shown up by then. Managed to surprise the smuggler so that he only hit my leg. Part of the curse managed to clip my face. It's not as bad as my leg but it still hurts on some days." I turned and wrapped Aesop in a hug. I buried my head in his shoulder and felt him slowly hug me back.

"I didn't know." I breathed out. "I can't believe that's what happened. The Ministry covered it up didn't they? I don't think...I never heard..." Aesop nodded against me as he laid his head on my shoulder, eyes finally falling close.

"They did. Wouldn't want the wizarding world to know that one of their greatest Aurors had failed." Aesop said, a bitter edge to his voice. "It's not the curse that makes it hard to talk about. I..." He trailed off and I nodded in understanding.

"It's Ashley." I breathed out. "You didn't fail her Aesop. You did everything you could to protect her. If you had known, if you had moved faster...it's all just playing into variables you had no control over." He nodded and buried himself deeper into me. "I think she'd be happy you came back here." I finally said, tangling my fingers in his hair. "I think she'd tease you about our relationship." I felt his laugh rather than heard it as he nodded. "And I think that I would probably get along nicely with her. Finding out all about how you were as a child and a teen." Aesop pulled back, a twinkle in his eye.

"Oh I can tell you that." He laughed. I smiled softly at him as he nodded towards the bed. "What do you want to know?"

[mdianasims]

There currently are 7 contestants, which means the minimum has been reached! Woo!

There are still 5 spots left, so feel free to submit a Sim! I would like them filled, because I meticulously planned a challenge based on 12 contestants.

As for timing, real life* has been rather busy lately, so I might (have to) extend the deadline again. Know that I am really grateful for all the amazing people who have submitted (or are going to submit) their incredibly lovely Sims. Seeing them and reading their bios really makes me want to start - but I can't start with a half finished house... So please be patient, I'll get there, because I truly am excited about this project/adventure/challenge. I also intended to post a pre-challenge/teaser post like the two I did last week (or was it the week before?), but I've barely had time for that, let alone build. Hence the banner above this post and not an actual picture. And I'm already half an hour past my (self-imposed) weekday screentime curfew (although, today, I only used the computer for adulting before making this post).

Longer real life explanation under the cut (everything's fine, just busy).

Real life has all positive, yet somewhat (or a little more than somewhat) scary, developments. I've been in the process of building a new house the past few years. After going from plan A, to plan B, to plan C, we're currently at plan D. And well into it. We got the planning permit (is that what it's called? anyway, the piece of paper that says you're allowed to build and costs a small fortune) in Spring. And now, past the Summer holidays, stuff is really starting to happen. Which I sort of knew, so having to postpone the bachelor challenge is definitely a case of poor (or should I say reckless?) planning on my side.

So, last week we heard our temporary home, which is a (somewhat) moveable unit, would be coming today. Which meant re-arranging some (or maybe a lot of) fencing. Which took a lot of time and caused a lot of sore muscles. But, the unit is here. And not usable, because it's not connected to the utilities. And that might take another month or two... At least there will be plenty of time for sorting out stuff and downsizing. My entire childhood came down from the attic, so there's a lot of memories I still need to sort through. Which is fun, but also mentally exhausting.

In the meantime I have my incredibly boring job that drains all my energy. And because of that I have career coaching that also takes a lot of mental energy. I'm trying to find a way to balance things, and I think I'm making some tiny form of progress. The balance is still off, but not as much as before.

But overall, it's just a lot. Doing things like simming, or playing another game I really enjoy would really help. But there are only 24 hours in a day and I do need sleep.

In short, real life consists of more adulting than I'd like, lots of decision making, mentally draining things and spending investing large sums of money (which is scary). I really wish reality was more like the Sims. I just need to sell al my amateurish paintings, then pop in to build mode, build my dream home and return to live mode. So much easier!

[snailsagere]

Please read my dni in my bio before interacting

I made another sims 4 legacy challenge, this is different from my usual content so feel free to ignore if this isn't your kind of thing! :3

Anyway welcome to the Halloween legacy challenge! In this challenge you will play through different typical halloween 'monsters' and complete the requirements for each generation!

-Making your sims the different occults is optional, if you'd like you can loosely make a sim based off the occult but not actually make them that specific occult type!

-you can choose which requirements you'll do since I did include some alternatives if you're missing any packs however

-try to complete at least 6 requirements per generation (unless I didn't include enough alternatives and you don't own a pack)

The packs commonly used in the challenge are-

Vampires, island living, werewolves, cottage living, cats and dogs, realm of magic, paranormal and get to work

I used other packs too but these are the ones I'd recommend if you want to get the best experience of this challenge!

👻Ghost👻

You don't remember much about your past but now you're a ghost with a love for haunting music... wait can I smell burning?

Traits-

Loner

Music lover

Gloomy or paranoid (strangerville)

Aspiration-

Musical genius

Career-

Entertainer musician branch

Requirements-

👻become a ghost

👻reach level 10 of any music skill

👻live in a haunted house (paranormal stuff)

👻if you don't have paranormal, live with three ghosts which you cannot control

👻finish the crystals collection

👻your partner must die

👻don't have a good relationship with your kids, you're not around much anymore

👻get the needs no one reward trait

🧟Zombie🧟

...

Traits-

Clumsy

Loner or socially awkward (high school years)

Foodie

Aspiration-

Master chef

Career-

Culinary chef branch

Requirements-

🧟never do well in school and drop out as soon a possible

🧟reach level 10 cooking and gourmet cooking skill

🧟complete experimental food photos collection (dine out)

🧟if you don't have dine out, cook one of each meal throughout your life

🧟only introduce yourselves to others with the rude introduction

🧟go running atleast once a week

🧟never increase your logic and handiness skills past 1

🎈Clown🎈

You followed the same path as your parents you dropped out of school and discovered that you have a passion for making others laugh! No stop crying! I'm funny!

Traits-

Erratic

Goofball

Childish

Aspiration-

Joke star

Career-

Entertainer comedian branch

Requirements-

🎈drop out of school as soon as possible

🎈reach level 10 comedy skill

🎈have a job as a teen

🎈move to a different world once per in game week

🎈befriend the tragic clown

🎈always live in small houses never bigger than one bedroom or always live in tiny houses

🐺Werewolf🐺

You ran away from home to start a new life for yourself, you took whatever money you could and decided to live off the land in moonwood mill

Traits-

Hot-headed

Childish or dog lover (cats and dogs)

Loves outdoors

Aspiration-

Freelance botanist or Friend of the animals (cats and dogs) or Werewolf initiate (werewolves)

Career-

None, you must make money by selling plants from your garden

Requirements-

🐺become a werewolf

🐺'run away' from home as a teenager

🐺have triplets (you can cheat for this)

🐺own atleast one pet dog (cats and dogs)

🐺home school you kids (make your sims kids take 2 days off school per week)

🐺reach level 10 gardening

🐺use the simple living lot trait (cottage living)

🐺if you don't have cottage living use the off-the-grid lot trait

👽Alien👽

You're new to this planet and you want to learn all about it and perhaps explore the rest of space too

Traits-

Genius

Perfectionist

Loner or paranoid (strangerville)

Aspiration-

Nerd brain

Career-

Astronaut or Scientist (get to work)

Requirements-

👽become an alien

👽build a space ship

👽go to sixam (get to work)

👽if you don't have get to work, once you build the spaceship go to space once per week

👽go to university and join a club (discover university)

👽if you don't have discover university join a club (get together)

👽complete the aliens collection

👽go on holiday at least twice

👽reach level 10 in the handiness and rocket science skills

🧹Witch🧹

You've gained lots of knowledge over the years from your parents and now wish to fully use it with you trusty feline companion

Traits-

Genius

Bookworm

Perfectionist or cat lover (cats and dogs)

Aspiration-

The curator or Purveyor of potions (realm of magic)

Career-

Business

Requirements-

🧹become a spellcaster

🧹learn and craft all potion recipes (realm of magic)

🧹if you don't have realm of magic, buy all reward trait potions that cost under 500 points

🧹complete frog collection

🧹own atleast one cat (cats and dogs)

🧹reach level 10 charisma

🧹own and use a voodoo doll atleast five times

🧹own a herb garden

🧚Fairy🧚

You love nature and feel connected to plants and animals and wish to live within nature

Traits-

Goofball

Loves outdoors

Vegetarian

Aspiration-

Freelance botanist or Spellcraft and sorcerery (realm of magic)

Career-

Gardener

Requirements-

🧚become a spellcaster

🧚own a large garden

🧚use the simple living lot trait (cottage living)

🧚use the off the grid lot trait

🧚reach level 10 gardening and herbalism

🧚enter the finchwick fair once a week (cottage living)

🧚own atleast one animal

🌊Mermaid🌊

You love nature, the ocean and mischief, you wish to allure other sims to danger while living a peaceful life in the water

Traits-

Music lover

Romantic

Loves outdoors or Child of the ocean (island living)

Aspiration-

Chief of mischief or Beach life (island living)

Career-

Gardener or Teacher (discover university) or Conservationist (island living)

Requirements-

🌊be a mermaid

🌊move somewhere close to water or sulani

🌊only take baths

🌊reach level 10 singing and mischief skill

🌊complete the seashell collection (island living)

🌊befriend a dolphin (island living)

🌊if you don't have island living own five pet fish instead

🌊kill atleast one sim (your choice how)

🦴Skeleton🦴

You're a bit bonely but you want to meet more sims just like you and try to learn new things

Traits-

Gloomy or Squeamish (outdoor retreat)

Lazy

Loner or Socially awkward (high school years)

Aspiration-

Big happy family or Lord/lady of the knits (nifty knitting) or Jungle explorer (jungle adventure)

Career-

Freelance any or Critic (city living)

Requirements-

🦴go on atleast two holidays to selvadorada (jungle adventure)

🦴befriend a skeleton (jungle adventure or paranormal)

🦴own a cow plant, if it dies you must keep the skeleton and get a new one

🦴own a skeleton fish

🦴complete sugar skull collection

🦴unlock the forever full reward trait

🦇Vampire🦇

You are immortal and you want to be the most successful out the whole rest of your family, afterall you do have forever to do so

Traits-

Ambitious

Snob or Proper (snowy escape)

Materialistic or self absorbed (get famous)

Aspiration-

Mansion baron or Master vampire (vampires)

Career-

Secret agent or Law (discover university)

Requirements-

🦇become a vampire

🦇own a plasma fruit orchard (vampires)

🦇if you don't own vampires own and fruit orchard worth around 10,000 simolions (decorations in the orchard do contribute to the 10,000 simolions)

🦇live in a mansion

🦇reach level 10 in piano or pipe organ skill

🦇have at least 100,000 simolions

🦇have at least one enemy

🦇master the vampire lore skill and complete the vampire skill tree (vampires)

🦇if you don't own vampires unlock the never weary and forever full reward traits

[studentbyday]

hello, i drafted an aesthetic studyblr post for today, but didn't feel like posting it bc today is an ugly rant kind of day. (more kermits under the cut)

AAAAHHHHHH STUPID FREAKING WINDOWS- 😩😫😭🤬🤬🤬 so i was working on my laptop for these past few days which uses a different ms office version from the computer i switched to today and all my work was LOST!! 😭😭 all the notes i took on OneNote (at least it was just the psyc notes i had done on the laptop - idk what i would do if biochem or mol bio notes were lost. i'd probably cry for real) and all the work i did on that biochem paper? GONE!! my brother uses LibreOffice so i finally switched to that (altho their UI isn't that nice). at this point, i might as well switch to linux (unless that would cause unforeseen problems if i still sometimes do work on windows? idk) 😅 any recs for free notes apps that have a small learning curve and are OneNote-like?

the STRANGEST part is, some of the notes and lost files came back as i was working?? i didn't do anything and i *swear* i wasn't seeing things, so like, WTF??? not that i'm complaining. i hope the entire week of psyc notes i lost comes back. if not, i'll probs rewrite them if i have time. i hope i have time. i really hate this.

also, good thing i didn't like the way i wrote the biochem paper so far. i rewrote the thing in a google doc instead just to be safe and i like the way it flows much better now. AND!!! it's super annoying that i had to do this, but my handwritten notes on the main article i'm basing my paper on were confusing me. like, in terms of the flow of the biochemistry. so i basically rewrote those notes, doing this huge web in paint and idk if i could've done that on the first read instead of the way i did it. i hate feeling like i've done double work.

after rewriting the paper (i'm not even done yet - there are several things i wanna add yet and some facts i wanna clarify) and my notes on the article for said paper, i was exhausted. i tried to switch gears by reading the instructions/background for the biochem discussion post due tmr (that i was supposed to write today 😒) but i don't get it. it's like i didn't cover lipoproteins at all! i don't remember anything! what am i here* for if i can't remember anything?!

update: i answered 1 question for the discussion post. i still have to answer 1 more but i need to finish reading the background info first.

ALSO! i was supposed to study for 6+ hours today. i have no idea how long i actually studied bc i kept stopping and starting the study with me video and i worked through the breaks anyway, so the dinging timers were just annoying.

*"here" as in at uni, studying, although if in the right mood, it could also expand to my entire existence 🙂 (luckily i'm too angry rn to feel philosophical 😒)

okay, let's try not to end so sour. good things that happened today:

physio exercises ✅

skincare ✅ (i have added lip balm to the list asides from lotion bc the chapped state hurts 🙁)

mol bio quiz ✅

journal ✅

tomorrow will be better. and if it doesn't start out right, imma fight it until it is and i won't be defeated 😠

[firerose18991]

Stretch to Fit

Minors DNI(age in bio)

Agedup!Maki Zen'in x Fem!Reader

Info: (lesbian) smut, touch of exhibitionism, s*x toy, fingering, reader is Maki's neighbor, All parties mentioned are 18+

A/N:Y'all I'm in love with the women of jjk

Wrdcnt: 1.152

"And like I want to do it but I think I'm too *small*." You confided in Maki one late night in the dorms.

 You and her had been having a weekend celebration at Maki's new apartment after her successful mission and ended up on the topic on your sex life. You were bi but lacked experience with either gender. While Maki was very experienced. It made sense to you to express these concerns to your friend.

"Women can push babies out and you think you're too small to fit a toy." She teased.

"I tried! I just can't do it properly." You were clearly embarrassed by your inability to fit the new toy you had purchased for yourself.

"Well let's see it." Maki suggested. Which was somehow more embarrassing than not being able to fit the toy.

Nonetheless you went to your home to retrieve the toy and show her. It was, true to your statement, far too big for a beginner let alone an experienced individual.

When you took it out of the box and displayed it there was a beat of silence.

"Why did you buy it so big!" She laughed in exasperation as her hand went to her face.

"Maki don't be mean!" you squealed back at her.

She reached over for the TV remote and turned up the sound on the movie that was playing and threw it away.

"Alright whatever, lay back." She instructed as she shed her pajama top and sat only in her underwear. 

"Wha-" before you finished Maki pushed you back on the bed.

"Common you spent a lot on this thing, at least try it. Think of something that turns you on. And maybe play with yourself a bit." She pointed to your clothed body.

"In front of you?!" You said almost sitting back up only to be pushed back down by Maki.

"Nothing I haven't seen before." She gave you a wicked grin.

Regardless of the odd circumstances you followed her orders. You laid back, pulled off your pajama bottoms and searched your mind for something to get you going. Maki was the only thing on your mind at the time, it felt a bit weird to think of your friend in a sexual fantasy but it worked and soon you fingers found their way to your pussy to massage your clit. You let out a heavy breath and Maki had noticed the gathering slick around your entrance. She pushed your thigh up a bit to get a better view. Feeling her intense gaze only accelerated your descent.

"Maki?" You questioned breathlessly feeling the movement. 

"Relax." She kissed down your inner thigh.

You weren't even differentiating reality and fantasy at this point and small desperate moans started to spill out of your mouth. You continued to play with your clit, your chest was heaving. The feeling of Maki slipping a finger inside your hot pussy made your eyes roll back. She moved the single digit slowly and attempted to remind you to lower your volume to not disturb the other neighbors. A second finger was added in the same manner as the first, Maki's goal was to let your body relax and accept the intrusion. But the third finger tested your width. She spread you to her satisfaction to accommodate the toy.

"Knew you could take it. Wanna try the toy?" Maki said. She gently lead your hand from your clit to above your head.

You were barely there. Your arms were splayed above your head, legs shaking. Your clit twitched at the edge of pleasure. Maki grabbed your dildo and rifled around in her dresser for some lube. She coated it with a generous amount of lube. She also ruffled the bed sheet under your bottom to give her a better view of your hole. Your lips were puffy and she had a clear view of your entrance. She pushed the head of the toy onto your hole.

"It's mmm tight." You said feeling the stretch.

"We're gonna take it slow. You'll get used to it." Maki said holding her position with the toy. She let you experiment squeezing around the tip to your content before she began to push it in again.

This time through a more narrow part of your body. You tensed your body pushing the toy out a bit.

"I can only put it in if you want it (Y/N). Don't move okay?" She cooed at you. By this point Maki had laid herself next to you and let her hands work with the toy while she whispered and kissed your ear.

You nodded at her command and she worked the dildo back in this time past the point of comfort. You held your breath and stopped your movements but the burn didn't stop.

"Keep breathing" Making said between her kissing your neck.

"It feels really good and really bad." You breathed out. 

"I know." Maki nuzzled the side of your face "We won't get the full thing today, but…" Making reached the desk beside the bed and grabbed a pocket mirror. "Take a look."

She handed you the mirror and you held it up so that you could see yourself completely wrapped around the head of the dildo. It still wasn't comfortable but seeing it turned you on a bit more. 

"It's cute." Maki whispered. You twitched around the toy in response and turned to look at Maki.

Her eyes were opened lazily, drunk on the view of you. You pulled her chin towards you and connected your lips. The two of you stayed like that for a while. Your arousal started to grow again. You could feel Maki pull back on the toy and soon you were empty. 

"You'll finish on my fingers for today." Maki said, placing the toy down. She could tell you were already worn out and trying to push on any further wouldn't yield any results.

You were oversensitive from the previous intrusion when Maki slipped her fingers in you flinched a bit. The previous coating of lube helped tremendously and Maki worked you up slowly. You moved your hips in time with her fingers and squeezed up Maki's thigh. You worked her panties down her hips and she finished kicking them off her legs. She moved her thigh to give you better access.  

You rubbed her sensitive clit. Watching you try tour first dildo had gotten to her. The two of you rocked together on her small bed, in a messy chase of pleasure. The two of you perfectly muffled each other with your lips. You came first, your walls sucked up on Maki's fingers. You separated from the kiss gasping on her chest. You continued swirling your fingers on Maki and she followed soon after you. She laid back breathlessly on the bed. The two of you fell into a deep sleep for the rest of the night. 

-firerose(based on a true story😳)

[acaseforpencils]

Gustavo Magalhães.

Bio: My name is Gustavo Magalhães and I am a Brazilian illustrator/cartoonist. I live in Caçapava, a small town in São Paulo state. I have worked as an illustrator since 2013.

As an editorial Illustrator, I've been published by The New Yorker, Golf Digest, Forbes, The New Republic, GQ Magazine among others. The first time I was commissioned by The New Yorker was in 2021, for "The Critics" session on a portrait of Sandra Oh" for her new show at the time, "The Chair," which aired on Netflix.

Sketch, refinement, finished piece.

I also have a web comic strip called "Curb Talk." It's published  twice a week in a classic Comic Strip format.

Lately, I am a Senior Illustrator at a Studio called "Fried Design Company ,'' in Springfield, Missouri. But I work from Brazil.

AOIKTYE Procreate Keyboard for Ipad / Apple Pencil / Ipad Pro

Mac Mini / Asus Proart PA248QV Monitor / Huion Kanvas Plus 22 Display

Tools of choice: My process of work is mixed, I like to sketch the first thumbs and sometimes more advanced pieces on paper and "ink" / color them using digital tools. It's been 5 years that more than 90% of my final pieces are done in digital, and along that period I discovered that I'm a person that likes to do a significant amount of tests while inking, and digital tools help me a lot in that.

Lately, I've been trying to achieve an inking process that I could do both on paper and on digital, that way I could do my pieces however I feel on that day, and my comic strip has been a good place for this test field, and I'm enjoying that mix very much.

Pentel .09 Mechanical Pencil / Staedtler Water Brush / Staedtler Pig LIner 0.3 / Royal Talens No. 2 Brush

If you were asking me "You are on a desert island and can bring just one setup with you," I'd say I would bring my iPad. It allows me to sketch with an "analogic feel," where it's important to feel that you are actually crafting something. But it also gives me all the testing possibilities the digital work has.

Huion Display pen Battery Free Pen PW517

Tool I wish I could use better: Coloring in general, but mostly painting. It's always a struggle to translate what I have in mind to the final piece. And there are some aspects of texture and rendering that you can only get in analogical tools like gouache, oil, watercolor. Of course there are excellent artists that do those digitally, but there are certain aspects that you need a physical touch to achieve and I have never done anything like that. Maybe one day.

Tool I wish existed: A chair + desk set that automatically corrects your bad posture whenever your body is hurting or sitting in the wrong way. I hate having lower back and wrist pains while working, haha!

Tricks: One thing I brought from the full analogical days is an adaptation of the "drawing from your shoulder thing." Personally, I found it very hard to do, so I use a bandana on my pen hand, and use the other hand to pool this and drag. This is a thing that helps me a lot when drawing straight lines with a handmade feel, instead of just using shapes in Photoshop or any digital tool for precise lines.

Misc: "Go easy on yourself and have fun!" I never thought I could work with illustration. I spent almost a decade working in the aircraft industry (half of it doing freelance illustration jobs for local bands and brands) and the factory mentality lever left my mind, just now (after 10 years as an illustrator, 7 as my main activity), I'm recovering the passion that I had as a young doodling kid. Everyone sees artistic careers as this romantic thing, but it's always a struggle (at least for me) to face your passion as an obligation day to day, and make this trade of time and love for money. So after several years going hard on myself I am finally learning how to be lighter and having more fun and joy in my work.

(Outro/Editor's note: I asked Gustavo if he would care to discuss how working in the aircraft industry affected his work as an illustrator):

I think the biggest influence I got from this industry was the routine and how to deal with work. Artists naturally tend to be less rigid in the aspect of routine because of the nature of creativity, and I think that having almost a decade working in another industry in a more conservative environment helped me in how to take it more serious in all aspects, from my day to day process, to how to treat my clients and deadlines.

That's basically the biggest influence and learning I got from this period. How to understand that the work isn't just the drawing and thinking, but everything that happens behind it, from the clothing choice I pick to work at home, from the time management I need to have in order to balance all simultaneous projects I have.

Website, etc.

Portfolio

Curb Talk Comics

Instagram

Twitter

----

If you enjoy this blog, and would like to contribute to labor and maintenance costs, there is a Patreon, and if you’d like to buy me a cup of coffee, there is a Ko-Fi  account as well! I do this blog for free because accessible arts education is important to me, and your support helps a lot! You can also find more posts about art supplies on Case’s Instagram and Twitter! Thank you!

[spokenrambles]

[ Maya Hawke, Genderqueer, She/They ] Oh, them? That's Robin Buckley, they are Twenty-Two years old. They are currently a [ Film Studies & Linguistics, Community College student and part time employee at Family Video]. I hear people say they are Witty, Analytical, Highly Intelligent, but also Blunt, Sarcastic, Verbose. I always think of worn down red converses, doodles on anything but paper, black chipped nail polish, an ungodly amount of VHS’, and meaningful looks exchanged between friends. I wonder what their favourite scary movie is?

˗ˏˋ Ooh, I think I found our morning movie - Doctor Zhivago ´ˎ˗

✧.* BASICS.

FULL NAME: Robin Elizabeth Buckley

NICKNAME/S: Rob, Tweedledee, Trumpet girl.

BIRTHDAY: May 27th.

ZODIAC: Gemini.

SEXUALITY: Closeted Lesbian.

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single.

OCCUPATION: Community college student and Part time Family Video employee.

✧.* PHYSICAL.

HEIGHT: 5'8", 173 cms.

HAIR COLOUR: Light brunette - Dirty Blonde.

EYE COLOUR: Blue.

TATTOOS + PIERCINGS: She has both her left and right ear lobes double pierced. She has an auricle and industrial piercing on her left ear.

NOTABLE FEATURES: Light freckles litter her body, only really able to be noticed in the right lighting. She also has a small baby scar, less than 1 cm long from when she used to play soccer in her younger years and fell onto a rock, the rock being sharp enough to pierce the delicate skin above her elbow leaving her with a lifelong scar.

.·:*¨¨* Ou-yay are-yay ump-day. *¨¨*:·.

✧.* LIKES.

Late night drives (even though, she's yet to get her license).

Languages.

Sweaters and denim/corduroy jackets.

The idea of travelling (Just being anywhere than where she is right now).

Girls who seem to fall in love with sterotypical Jocks/men who peaked in high school, instead of her

✧.* DISLIKES.

Being backed into a corner. Robin is very much the type that no matter the social environment she is in, likes to know that she at least has one way of escape.

Being Isolated/alone. Robin can’t stand being by herself, she doesn’t like being left alone with her thoughts. Where she has no choice but to reflect on everything.

Hawkins.

Jell-0 (The texture itself completely throws her off, it genuinely gives her the creeps).

`*:;, Took me six months longer to walk than all the other babies :.,;*

✧.* HOBBIES.

Learning new languages, whether that be within an educational setting or in her own free time.

Making the greatest top ten movie list to ever grace the four walls of family video (while also slowly rating all, if not most, of family video's film collection).

Arguing with anyone, who dares to doubt that Mint choc is the superior ice cream flavour.

ੈ✩‧₊˚ Maybe, I’m happy by myself? Not everyone needs a relationship to be happy, you know ˚₊‧✩ੈ

✧.* FEARS.

Being outed and becoming a social leper.

Never being good enough, or living up to the high expectations those around her have seemed to have set for her.

Never 'escaping' Hawkins.

Watching those she loves die, she’s not quite sure how this fear came to be but it’s something that whenever Robin notices her brain slowly drifting towards it; she finds herself going through fifty-five unwarranted, internal panic attacks.

✧.* GOALS/AMBITIONS.

Finishing college.

Saving enough to run away travel, she just wants to see the world. After all, it’s not like there’s anywhere worse than where she is right now.

Getting out of Hawkins.

˗ˏˋ So like, I wasn't super focused in there or anything, but... I'm pretty sure that mom was trying to bang her son ´ˎ˗

✧.* BIO/HC'S.

: ̗̀➛ Robin was born to Richard and Melissa Buckley, two borderline teen parents.

: ̗̀➛ Due to her parents age, when they had her. Robin didn’t have the most materialistic upbringing, her parents barely being able to keep a roof over all of their heads but hey! At least they were happy…. For the most part.

: ̗̀➛Robin had always been naturally gifted at music. As a child, it was one of her only talents/hobbies that her mother enthusiastically approved of and encouraged her to improve on.

: ̗̀➛ Robin originally joined the soccer team as a way to bond and connect with her father. She ended up being part of said team for a good year or two. Before, she’d witnessed one of her teammates gruesomely break her leg. Something that’d end up causing her to leave the team. At least that’s what she said was the reason.

: ̗̀➛ Robin started learning languages at a young age as a way to pass her time. It was her distraction/escapism from the everyday loneliness she’d constantly feel in her life (something that was the result of being an only child and having very little friends, something that wouldn’t really change until high school).

: ̗̀➛ The only real friend Robin had growing up was Barb but Barb by their later middle school years, traded her in for the perfect and totally not a priss Nancy Wheeler! Something that to this day, Robin still hurts a little over.

: ̗̀➛ Robin held a deep resentment towards Steve Harrighton for majority of her high school experience, his cocky and aloof behaviour, along with his constant tardiness and the way he'd ask dumb questions; fuelling her distaste for him. But what really cemented her resentment of him during those years was the way he was effortlessly able to obtain the attention of her high school crush, Tammy thompson. Something that she was never able to do herself. However, she swears up and down, that she's completely over it now!

: ̗̀➛Robin has always known she was different, ever since she was a little. She just didn’t realise that, that difference was that she was a lesbian. Something she didn’t figure out until the very end of middle school.

: ̗̀➛ Robins never actual had a committed/serious relationship with anyone throughout highschool, even till now. Of course, she’s kissed a guy or two but besides that? Nothing. She’s always tried to argue the fact that Hawkins men just didn’t do it for her, or how she’d rather not risk catching something because, ‘hey, have they seen the guys they let live in this town’, or hell! How she just ‘doesn’t want a relationship’. Just saying anything really to push past the subject.

: ̗̀➛ Robins relationship with her mother is strained to put it lightly, she loves her mum and she’s sure she loves her too. It’s just her mother never seems to be satisfied or to approve of her life decisions or future plans, and has taken a habit of constantly pointing out her flaws and reminding her of them on a daily basis. Something she’s been doing to Robin, ever since she was little. She however, does have a close relationship with her father and knows that no matter what, at least he’s always there to support and love her unconditionally, regardless of all her little flaws.

: ̗̀➛ Academically? Robins college life is going well. It’s been worth every hard earned penny in her mind. However, Socially? Well, that depends on who you ask but in all honesty, it leaves much to be desired for her. She’s constantly left longing for some sort of real connection with any of her peers, something that doesn’t result in her having to put up some façade to keep those around her happy.

: ̗̀➛ Robin recently rescued a little black cat, that she’s affectionately named ‘Whiskers’. Something that has caused a few “you’re going to turn into a crazy old cat lady” comments from those closest to her.

: ̗̀➛ As mentioned previously, Robin still hasn’t gotten around to getting her license, the whole being poor thing and now having to pay her way through college, pushing it further onto the back burner. So, instead she either gets around via public transport, friends who offer her a ride or, her trusty two wheeler.

: ̗̀➛ After only just coming to terms with her sexuality and what that meant for her throughout her entire high school experience, she’s now began to question her gender expression. Something that currently has her conflicted and has her digging herself deeper into the closet.

: ̗̀➛ Trying to keep her mind off her internal conflicts when it comes to her identity and her family pressures, she’s been throwing herself even further into her studies and her job. Taking on more hours and tasks, than she can actually handle half the time.

: ̗̀➛ To be updated/continued!

✧.* PLAYLIST.

- TBA.

[cuckoo-among-beasts]

♥ ☢ ♒

salty af munday meme || @pctaldrunk

♥ What’s the WORST thing that has happened to you rp wise?

*sighs and stares into space for a moment* My first tumblr rpc was Su.per.natural. I rped the trench coat clad celestial, however, I was not into the main ship for that muse, but a smaller ship with the younger brother of the duo. The amount of hate and threats I got for that. I've never in my life met a fandom so vicious and venomous as that one. It didn't hurt me per se, but after a while it gets annoying and tedious to constantly log in to at least one nasty message. It all went so far that I can't watch that show again, so a small portion of the fandom completely ruined a show I used to love and I might end up being bitter about that for a very long time (I'm trying not to).

☢ What fads/trends are you so over?

First one is all the elitism. Like heavens we're all here to write and have fun. If you absolutely can't write with someone because they don't use fancy icons and five different kinds of editing to their posts, then just... fuck off (from me). Don't get me wrong, if people want to use formatting and fancy graphics etc, they absolutely should, but when that becomes a requirement for interaction, that's when I bristle. Thankfully, this seems to be getting better, at least in the rpc corner where I am.

Second: the instant hate for OCs. That OCs have to hop through some extreme hoops to get interaction. I get wanting a bio, but if it's too short - people complain, if it's too long - tl;dr. Like, it's never good enough. In my experience, some of the best muses I've interacted with are OCs. I've seen just as many bad OCs as bad canon muses (bad imo, obviously).

And third, that female muses has such a harder time. I really don't get why many seem to look down on female muses. It makes no sense to me. Especially "softer" female muses, seem to get the brunt of it and I'm like... don't we need all kinds of muses? Just like society needs different kinds of people too? Idk.

♒ Thoughts on the fandom you’re currently rping in?

I have many thoughts! I'm very new. I created the sideblog version of this account on the 12th of August, so I've not even been here for two months and never have I felt this welcomed anywhere else. I thought that I might never find any other rper within this fandom and if I did that they would be so established in who they rp with that I'd never have a chance. Plus from the posts I saw, many dislike Huaisang a lot, seeing him as evil and "worse than JGY" etc, so I expected dislike and being ignored (especially since the only adaption I've finished yet is the donghua) when what I've received is appreciate and love. Haha I'm blushing as I'm typing this, definitely not used to this. But yeah, I love it here. Thank you so much to all of you who have welcomed me and rped with me and indulged all my ideas and headcanons. I'm looking forward to further interaction as well as interacting with those I haven't done so with yet.

[lovelisara]

— 11 september 2023

so much to update you all on. i'll use bullet points for this.

first of all, i apoligize for not posting anything! it makes me very sad :(. i did want to! i was just so so busy, and when i was going to write, i just kept thinking about how much i had to update you all on, and it kept getting worse and worse.

classes are going great. slowly getting into the swing of things. had my first assignment for a class due a few days ago. wasn't anything major, just a bit time consuming, but i was able to do it in a day or so after preparing for it for the whole week. if that makes sense.

film lab especially is going great. meeting more and more of my peers in there. it's small, so i really do wanna build those good connections with them. they all just seem so kind.

thinking of attending lego club meetings sometimes! they're just so late, from 5-7, on monday, and i finish class at 5 on monday so we'll see. as long as i can catch the bus i'll be good, but there's thankfully a stop right in front of the library!

i have a few campus crushes i'd like to inform you all on:

gym bae: a guy i saw at the gym and was really nervous to even look at. he just looked so handsome, beautiful even. he wears glasses and has a really good haircut. i just was very shy. my two friends k and j came to the gym since their usual gym was too busy. j suggested i give him her hip thrust barbell pad, but i just didn't want to because i just was not feeling confident. he seemed very much out of my league. then she went up and did it, and a few moments later he asked her to spot him on bench press. which is alright! what really got me, though, is on the walk back home she said 'that could've been you' and it just really cemented how insecure and shy i am and let myself be. didn't like that. but i'm over it now, just thought i should share it though since it's part of his lore. haven't seen him since.

bus bae: a guy on my bus. he has a resting bitch face, but has dirty blondish hair, kinda floppy but not embarrassingly floppy. can't describe it well, but hopefully you get me. he wears glasses as well. not much to say about him. he has freckles. that's all really.

evil eye bae (alex): this guy's it. i am crushing quite hard, but i would just like to say i don't want a relationship! though i would love love love to talk to him more and be his friend. he looks so so kind. he's in my race & ethnicity class and is very quiet. never talks in our big group discussions, but in small groups and in pairs he does. one time he sat next to me and i was so shy i couldn't even bring myself to ask his name. even though i knew it already since we had introduced ourselves the first day of class and i remembered his. i think it was after he sat next to me i like found him on linked in (i'm not creepy i swear!!!) and saw he was majoring in the same thing as my roommate k! i showed her and she said he looked familiar, turns out they took a class together. one day, i saw he was waiting for someone outside of the building, and it was two girls. i had found his instagram too (i really am not crazy, i feel like this is kinda normal for girls to do, but maybe i'm trying to justify my craziness.) and he thankfully didn't like have anyone in his bio or anything. but i did notice he was following the girlfriend (m) of this guy (n) i know, which i found weird bc they have totally different majors. then i asked k to see if she could look up evil eye bae under the n's following, and they do follow each other. along with like 4 of k's friends i know well!!!! she told her friends about it, and they're all gassing up evil eye bae, saying how he's super kind, very sweet, very shy too. n and him went to high school together! i told the n to see if evil eye bae would be down to go to his frat's party this weekend, so i'll see what he says at some point. i'm hoping to maybe sit next to him tomorrow or at least at the same table to talk to him some more.

my bookclub had a lot of people at their call out meeting last week. haven't even started our first book, but i will sometime today on the bus probably! it's divine rivals by rebecca ross.

i've been slowly reading percy jackson book 2, as well as manacled. not super far into them, like three chapters each, but i'm obsessed with them both.

haven't played many games, but i've been trying to play red dead 2 some more, considering i spent so much money on it hahah. i also want to play starfield, but need more storage. want to get back into wizard101 too!

got my glasses fixed. so slay.

went on a hike with a random man that added me one night. we both don't remember how, but it was from when we went to latin night. he's a very kind guy, good head on his shoulders, very disciplined and fit and healthy. only problem is he's too young for me, and so i made it clear that even if i was interested in dating, i wouldn't date him because of that, but that i had no problem being friends and getting to know him more!

went to a frat party this past weekend and it was barbenheimer theme. i looked so fucking good, my god. wish we would've stayed longer, but alas. i dressed up as oppenheimer ;).

still coughing. not sure when this will end, but thankfully it always goes away after i take my inhaler.

i don't think i have anything else to say. i'll be more consistent from now on! i love giving daily updates. i'll see you all tomorrow!

3 things i'm grateful for:

mason jars.

wild blueberries.

my impeccable taste in music.

— xx lisa! see you soon <3

[beetrootbug]

Okay i see where you're coming from with this argument about kids and what not. I don't agree with bullying kids at all, which is why i get so pissed at these anti shippers who are probably adults or older teens coming down so hard on young kids who probably haven't even finished puberty yet. It's the same way i feel about other kinds of antis, like dream antis. Dream stans are concerning and I hate the way they behave but I understand that most are young and being influenced by a youtuber with an ego. And I get genuinely pissed at the antis because they are literally just bullying children and making a situation even worse. I'm sorry i portrayed all those that identify as proship as pedos/incels, I mainly said that to highlight the stereotype that most antis think of when they think proshipers (hence the quotation marks around the word incel). I think i also just didn't realise there were people who identify as proship, since it has such negative connotations, i thought it was only something, again, pedos and such used. Why? Because the only bios i saw that term used were of people who were confirmed pedos. I don't use twitter so I'm pretty sheltered from majority of this proship vs antiship stuff. For context of my original post, i wrote that after i saw a reupload here on tumblr of a shocking thread between a bunch of self proclaimed antishippers where the conversation ended with "Maybe hitler was right" because they were convinced that japanese people were responsible pedophile. My point was just complaining about how these, quite frankly, idiots can act "holier than thou" by claiming to take down pedos but then be incredibly racist. Ergo, becoming the thing you sort to destroy. This was mainly just a post written from pure shock and emotion, which probably isn't a good thing in retrospect.

Anyways, about the whole "it sounds like something a child would write" it wasn't. Again, I guess i'm just not so great at explaining or understanding this stuff (idk if that makes sense but). It was written by an adult because it was a canon couple from a show that i watch, and i was worried things would get worse in the fandom, mainly because i already saw a person trying to defend it by saying "well teenagers do that anyway so it's normal". Yes teenagers do that anyway, but if they were to take things further (which of course the canon couple wouldn't because they are from a kids series but I freak out over small things, which is probably obvious) that would venture into illegal territory (at least here in australia). I know this because it happened to a classmate back in high school. He was 16, his girlfriend was 13, they fucked, and now he can't ever get a working with children's check and cannot work with kids, because 16 is of age and 13 isn't. And it is really really normal in my small town for Grade 12 boys to date grade 7 girls, and the relationship isn't great. A lot of these kids are influenced by media, just media in general. Whether be a show they are probably too young to watch or be it fanfics. I know this again, because i had old friends in highschool who would read fics (that would probably considered quite normal all things considered) about romanticising abusive relationships to the point that they craved a relationship like that because they felt a normal healthy relationship was too boring.

I'm also not against fucked up shit. I like reading and writing about psychological torture and cannibalism and what not. Evil media doesn't make people evil, video games and fics about violence and murder don't make people crave violence. For some it's a cathartic, for others it's just interesting. But when abusive relationships/actions are shown to be normal or even fun and exciting, that's where stuff gets murky. It's been proven movies that have plots where men spy on women getting dressed and the women are just okay with it normalises the idea that women are always performing for men and men can just sexualise women whenever they want. It's also been proven that movies that have men saying "hey don't do that" the other men sexualising women also impacts the viewer and their beliefs. There are movies that showcase women being stalked. One is a horror movie and the other is a rom com. They are both about the same thing with similar plots just framed in different ways. When i write about fucked up stuff like cannibalism, i do it to evoke a sense of disgust. Not really a sense "oh that's bad, that's evil!" but rather a sense of "why would someone do that?". A way that's meant to make you question whether it's a normal thing or an evil thing. Who's to say really? But i don't romantise that (or at least I sure hope I don't) mainly cus idk, seems like a weird thing to romantising? Considering I have bad intrusive thoughts about this kind of shit? I guess that's also why i don't react well to certain things, I have a lot of fucked up intrusive thoughts that have impacted me and life and made normal things hard. So i guess i get confused seeing people genuinely enjoy this sorts of things that have plagued me for so long.

I'm not saying media needs to exist to teach only good things, i think life would be boring. But though it's fiction, fiction affect real life. Like, all the time. So many things are affected by fictional works, so to just say "it's just fiction" is a little wild to me, i guess. The only solutions I can think of atm is

a) we stop making stories with fucked up shit in it

or

b) we stop being influenced by fiction

neither will ever fully happen, because fucked up shit can be fun to read and people often try to make reality fit to fiction.

Honestly, the bigger issue is less so the 13yo fic writers but rather the hollywood bigshots who write the new most influential movie. But it can be so easy to get caught up with "low hanging fruit" that we miss the bigger issue.

Kids are going to be curious about fucked up shit and I'd much rather they read something that makes them question the morality of it than something that outright condemns OR romanticises it (depending on what the "it" in question is, cus some things should never be okay and some things are just blown way out of proportion)

(sorry if this comes across as hostile, i'm not trying to be mean or anything i just struggle with tone)

Listen, I hate pro shippers and my 'beliefs' probably align with antis, but like?? Actual people who embrace being an anti?? They are so weird, it's literally just an excuse for them to harass people. A lot of them exhibit the same "incel" behaviour that pro shippers do. Like dude, you can hate pedophilia, talk shit about someone for liking that and NOT BE RACIST?? ITS NOT THAT HARD??? HOW DOES RACE EVEN GET PULLED INTO THIS??? Literally, people keep talking about how "japan was a mistake and everyone there should die because blah blah blah" bro literally every proshipper i've ever encountered was a fucking white american, what are you on about?? You guys understand that certain states in america still allow CHILD MARRIGE, RIGHT?? STOP ACTING HOLIER THAN THOU