#i'm thinking the little guy could make a decent coaster

[payaso-gomi]

Creating a penenko perlers

[angstywaifu]

Black Dahlia - 1. No Daughter of Mine.

Synopsis: TBA Garrick Tavis x OC (Dahlia ?????) A/N: I couldn't wait any longer to start sharing this series with you guys. I am so excited for you to meet Dahlia and go on this roller coaster of a journey with me. This is your warning that this series will have a decent amount of angst and hurt, and will be a slow burn. Garrick going to have his work cut out for him And I'm curious... who do you think her sibling is after this?

Black Dahlia Masterlist | Masterlist

Of course I would dream of that day. Of course my brain would bring up this memory now. Making me relive the worst day of my life. Doomed to haunt me till the day I would shrivel up and die.

There I am. So young and naïve. Not a care in the world as I run through the trees with my friends. No clue of what’s to come in a mater of minutes.

My feet push me further and further into the forest. Everything a blur of green and brown. My heart hammering loudly in my chest as I push myself to keep going. To win.

I can hear the sounds of their foot steps behind me. But not gaining. No. I was the fastest. The more agile. It gave me an upper hand while manoeuvring through the trees. I was going to win.

Ahead the trees start to thin, more light seeping into the dense forest. A beacon guiding us to the finish line. But for me…. It was guiding me to victory.

The boys had been stupid to suggest a race through the forest. But they were determined to beat me. At everything else we did they had the upper hand. They were bigger and stronger. Able to weld those training swords better than I. But when it came to this. No one could catch me.

I cry out in victory as I leap over a fallen log and into the clearing. Jumping up and down as I celebrate. I turn to watch the boys jump over the tree before placing their hands on their legs as they try to catch their breath.

I go to tease them about my victory, just like they would in the training grounds. But my words fall short as the ground trembles beneath me. A feeling I knew all too well. The boys eyes go wide at the sight behind me. I turn ever so slowly to see a hoard of dragons behind me. We had run so far through the first we had ended up in the clearing where the riders dragons were kept. And in the middle of them was a dragon I knew all too well. My father’s.

Unlike the boys behind me I wasn’t scared of the dragons. But coming from infantry, the boys behind me had never really been taught about dragons. They were scared.

“There’s nothing to be afraid of.” I tell them as I take in the dragons in front of us.

The dragons looked beautiful in the sunlight. Their scales glistening when the sunlight hit just the right spot. I couldn’t help but be drawn to a blue one down the back. Blue dragons had always been my favourite. But they were the most ruthless of the colour. My father teaching me to never approach one.

“If there’s nothing to be afraid of why don’t you approach them.” One of the boys behind me mocks.

“I’m not afraid. Only a fool would approach a dragon” I call back.

“Liar. You’re scared.” Another mocks, the others snickering at his comment.

I whip back towards them. “I’m not scared.” I say sternly, my hands forming into fists at my side.

“Approach them then. Your father’s a dragon rider. You should know what to do.” One of the older boys states as he walks towards me. “You want to be one of them one day. Go on then. Get some practice.”

He shoves me in the shoulder sending me stumbling backwards towards the dragons. I couldn’t deny I was a little scared. I’d only been near a dragon a handful of times. But never on my own. Always with my father watching over my brother and I.

I turn and face the dragons behind me. My father’s dragon now front and centre.

I could do this. I knew this dragon. He belonged to my father. He wouldn’t hurt me. Right?

Each step forward has ever fibre of my body telling me to run. Don’t give into peer pressure. Turn back and let them think what they want. Prove to them you aren’t afraid another one. But I don’t. I keep putting one foot in front of the other.

My father’s dragon exposes his teeth, a low growl rumbling from its throat as he watches me approach. A warning. Even he knew this was foolish.

My heart beat thunders loudly in my ears. Drowning out the world around me. Run. I need to turn around and run.

Out of the corner of my eye I see it. My head snapping to the side as the rock soars over my head. I watch it, following it as it arcs through the air, and meeting its target. Right in the middle of the dragons left eye. I watch as its tongue curls, an orange glow igniting at the back of its throat. Its mouth still angled down towards me.

I turn to run even though I know it’s futile, know that I won’t make it. But I have to try. As I turn I feel the heat behind me. Know what’s about to happen. I shut my eyes, bracing for my end. But it’s an end that never comes as I’m pushed by something. No not something. Someone.

I soar across the clearing, landing with a thud on the ground near the boys as a scream rips through the clearing. By the time I look up no one is there. Just a pile of ash on the ground. A pile of ash my father rushed towards. My twin brother not far behind. My father’s screams and pleads echoing around the clearing along with my brothers cries. I scramble up to my feet, limping over to my father and brother.

“F-father?” I stutter out, my voice shaking.

Never in my life had I seen my father that mad as his head whips towards me. Tears brimming his eyes as he sneers at me.

“T-this is your fault!” He bellows as his eyes narrow at me.

I stop in my tracks shocked at my father’s outburst. My brother also recoiling from him slightly. His eyes also brimming with tears.

“How could you be so foolish? You know better than this! She’s dead because of you!”

I look down at the pile of ash he gestures to. And that’s when it hits. Know why my father and brother look so distraught and upset. The pile of ash was my mother.

I go to rush forward, but my father’s hand whips out and shoves me backwards to the ground. The force vibrating through my body as I hit the ground.

I’d killed my mother. I shouldn't have listened. Should have stood my ground. I should have run. If I had run she would be alive.

I look up and meet my father’s eyes. His gaze pinning me to the ground. I open my mouth to apologise, but he cuts me off with words that would stick with me for the rest of my life.

“You’re no daughter of mine.”

A/N: If you want to be on the tag list for this series please comment below <3

[lunaryrs]

hey i need to know what cars austin hanna's children canonically drive. thank's.

yayyyyy i love assigning cars to muses ^_^ i'm not as good at these sort of lists as u but i'm gonna try hard and really believe in myself and you're gonna smile and nod at all of it because what;s the alternative? to challenge me and look like a total bitch? exactly.

cora i want to say drives something like a 2017 kia forte, in the dark reddish maroon color. she bought it second hand after crashing her former and first car, an older pontiac sunfire. it was also secondhand and shitty, but she insisted on saving and spending all on her own. she could've had something better, but unfortunately has a brain disease that makes her repel her loving and helpful parents.

ezra strikes me as a station wagon guy. i think he could have wanted to make it happen on his own, in which case i see him in something like a 2000s subaru outback in the green color. austin clapped him on the shoulder for that one. if you see him in something more modern, i'm thinking a white 2019 tiguan.

zoe is a jeep renegade girlie, in graphite grey (i think? i toyed with black and white and the blue color). i'm thinking something more generic like the grey because she's for sure leasing it on her teacher's salary. maybe leasing to buy, but definitely leasing. she's the sort of girl that has decorative coasters in her cup holders and some macrame something orother hanging from her rearview. she's got a sparkly bath and body works fragrance holder on her driver's side visor and she's always got a fresh warm vanilla sugar insert on deck

maisyn drives a 2009 ford focus, in the blue/grey sort of color. there's a taco bell 5-layer burrito stain on the upholstery, right where she dropped in between her legs eating one-handed on the road. she's got a fat stack of CDs that are always spilling out of her center console, the cases of many having cracks in the plastic for being stepped on in her passenger seat. when people get in her car, she has to get out and remove the canvas totes and birkenstocks tossed into and never removed from her back seat along with the week-old dunkin' bag she was using to collect trash like napkins and straw rappers. she does this outside of people's houses, btw. doesn't prepare in advance.

ayla drives a mercedes gle coupe, in maybe a white or a red depending on how bougie we see her. this is all based off of you saying she appreciates the name brand and sensuality of a dove bar. we've never discussed her but i love your characterization. she's the kim kardashian of this family; she's hot and she's got main character syndrome. you know she feels hot as hell driving around in her little black slit sunglasses. she's got an off-white flower hair clip clapsed to her passenger side mirror, whole car smells like expensive perfume and her marc jacobs tote bag is perpetually riding shotgun. she uses apple carplay to stream music and be alerted to new text messages, which she replies to by manually texting and driving. fortunately, she's got decently quick reflexes (years of practice?) so she hasn't yet rear-ended anyone doing so, but she's definitely had a few close calls.

rylan oh you know he drives a hybrid of some sort (again based on waht you said about him and ice cream) and won't let anyone forget it. maybe a 2017-ish toyota prius prime. austin went with him to help pick it out; talked a big game about helping him navigate the dealership, but ultimately ended up folding to an outrageous offer too soon. fortunately, rylan walked in there with a plan and was able to negotiate for himself. austin was so proud, and when he recounted the story to camryn later, he claimed it was his plan all along to see how the kid did for himself.

orla is a only a baby, so jot that down. maybe she's a late bloomer or maybe she's failing to launch, but i do think she's indulged by camryn and austin a little. they're adamant they're not enabling her, because she has had stuff going on and benefits from the healthy, cozy environment in the hanna home. she doesn't have a car of her own, but borrows her parents' when she needs to get around. she's scratched up the honda pilot in the past, so her privileges have officially been revoked per austin. i think they're a two-car household and i could see camryn with something cute and sleek like maybe a black mazda 3, especially as the kids are older and she needs to transport less. that one is much easier for orla to navigate in.

[yotome]

Cynic seeks route to experience actual emotions

(minor not very important spoilers for Sariel)

My first route was Clavis. He's actually the reason I started Ikepri, and I liked him much more than I thought I would - I tore through that storyline twice like nobody's business! In other words, he set a pretty dang high standard.

Next, there was Chevalier. Gotta understand Chevalier to understand Clavis, right? I got through both runs in decent time, though occasionally Chev's MC over-otomed me, and I would have to take a recovery break to handle my alarmingly berserk blood pressure.

I read one of Leon's routes after that, and he seemed like a cool dude. I wasn't sure if I wanted to do both, though, so I tried Yves. He is baby.

I next landed on Sariel's route. It had just been released, after all, plus he's purple and wears glasses for extra cool points. It didn't seem to be going much of anywhere for me at the start, but hey, you never know! It could ramp up!

Then I got to the first hint of romance, and ...

Oh. She fell off something (stairs? ladder? the floor?) because otome, but held onto her books also because otome because she treasures them greatly. He's kinda touched by the strength of her passions overcoming the instinctive fear of a fall, or something (i.e. she didn't catch herself). She thinks he's hot and possibly morally questionable. Yes, honey, he is both. He wouldn't wear a pant leg made of belts if he was just some normal guy.

I tried to go "aww" but found the impulse utterly missing. I wasn't even irritated, weirdly enough. Hello? Heart? You still in there?

... No response.

At that point, I stopped reading his route. I didn't change to another suitor, as I kept telling myself that I'd resume in a little bit. Of course, life happened, and there were days where I forgot to log in ... which is when the app started doing THIS:

The first time it happened: I guess that's kinda cute.

The secondish time: You already told me that.

The ??? time: Dammit Sariel, get over the punishment gag already. What are you, a minister or a one-trick pony??

The most recent time: YOU THINK YOU CAN PUNISH ME, DO YOU? FOOL. YOU HARDLY KNOW THE MEANING OF THE WORD. I'LL MAKE YOU TALK TO CLAVIS FOR 24 HOURS STRAI... hold up, am I getting dramatic at an app notification??

So I'm thinking that's a sign I probably should change routes now. :D (And block the notifications.) I just don't have a particular route I really want to start at the moment, so I must ponder. I am leaning towards avoiding Nokto, mostly because I Strongly. Dislike. Suitors. Getting all up in my MC's space, and I just have A Bad Feeling About This (TM) when it comes to him.

That still leaves:

Jin "I like the tiddies so much I got my own set" Grandet, either route

Leon, who is definitely a Good Guy but his armor looks too loose somehow, round 2

The actual Muffin Man, Yves*, round 2

Licht, who I understand has some Srs Probbems, either route

Luke "Eh" Randolph, who seems eh in turn?, either route

Or heck, I could just ride the roller coaster of bad decisions made with the best of intentions again. You do you in every route and event, Clavis, and I appreciate that. You do you.

*it is only thanks to this game that I know "Yves" is pronounced "eve." Not all "Yeh-ves" weird like I'd been saying it FOR MY ENTIRE LIFE. Thanks, otome! The more you know.

** I did not know anyone named Yves, so I never heard the name said out loud and just ... well, I'm gonna pronounce all the letters I see written unless someone tells me otherwise. That's how my brain rolls.

[askvariance]

💎 Blitz and Veto

💎 Does your OC collect anything? Is there a reason? When did they start and is it beginning to turn into a little bit of a hoarding issue? What do they do with their collection?

VETO: Huh. Do you collect anything?

BLITZ: Very gracious of you to let me go first.

VETO: I'm cool like that.

BLITZ: I've never had the knack for collecting. I've idly noticed that I have more than one of something I find pleasant, but even if I decide to start a collection, it never really prompts me to go out and get more.

VETO: Just tell Nickle that you're starting one. They'll start picking them up and giving them to you.

BLITZ: Hah.

VETO: What would you collect? You know, if you were going to.

BLITZ: Hmm. I'm not sure.

VETO: I bet it'd be something fucked up.

BLITZ: Such as what, taxidermied small animals?

VETO: Nah, too obvious. More like you're an undercover vampire who thinks collecting things will help them pass as a regular guy, but picks something that is completely unhinged to actually have in your house. Like a wall display of completely normal umbrellas. Or obituaries from sixty years ago.

BLITZ: Perhaps I should look into collecting rude little gremlins who forgets to change their socks.

VETO: Good luck with that. I'm one of a kind.

BLITZ: Silverware, most likely. Coasters. Other assorted things I've stolen from fancy restaurants.

VETO: Oh my god?

BLITZ: Actually, I do already have some. Maybe that counts.

VETO: Where??

BLITZ: In with the rest of the dishes. Where else would it be?

VETO: Fucking incredible. Never change.

BLITZ: What about you?

VETO: Oh, yeah. I've got a decent amount of merch. Posters, action figures, that sort of thing. Been a while since I've bought any new ones, but I still have those around in my room.

BLITZ: ...And?

VETO: And what?

BLITZ: Surely you don't mean to imply this is the most significant collection you own?

VETO: Oh, you mean THIS?

[Veto pulls their soundboard case out from its compartment in their wheelchair. Blitz just smiles, pleasantly indulgent, as they pop it open.]

BLITZ: Illegally downloaded audio files and movies, hm?

VETO: Better than treasure. Check this out.

[Veto pops the case open, revealing an electric soundboard with a truly staggering number of tiny switches. Below it is a compartment with several trays, all full of plastic sleeves that look alphabetized. There are some dents and little paint stains on the soundboard. It looks old, but in good condition.]

BLITZ: They really should have known better than to ask you this one.

VETO: Oh, tell me about it. Buckle up, kids, hope you've got a few hours. Let's fucking go!

VETO: Where to start, where to start.

BLITZ: Why not begin with your noise machine?

VETO: Yeah, might as well.

[They set the soundboard on their lap, almost reverently.]

VETO: And it's a soundboard, not a noise machine. Get with it.

BLITZ: Agree to disagree.

[Veto hits one of the switches on the soundboard and a button on the side of the case.]

SOUNDBOARD: [ YOU'RE OUT OF TOUCH ]

[Blitz sighs. Veto winks.]

BLITZ: Very funny.

VETO: It's not Thursday, but you get the point.

VETO: I probably started this one when I was... I don't know, thirteen? Maybe fourteen. That's when I started clipping audio and making my own music in software programs.

BLITZ: You didn't collect any music albums before that?

VETO: Oh, good point. Then it's since I was eight.

[They look down at the soundboard fondly.]

VETO: I liked music, but I think I started because I liked references. People would watch a movie and then they'd just say one line from it, and everyone would laugh. Like you could cut this one thing out and it would mean something. I wanted to take everything apart like that.

BLITZ: So when you asked me if I dissected rodents as a child, was that projecting?

VETO: Not unless you count Alvin and the Chipmunks.

BLITZ: Mm. Yes, I would have been inspired to take a knife to that horrible little creature, too.

[Veto laughs. Blitz smiles, checking their nails.]

VETO: I stockpiled for ages to get my first switchboard. That one was huge. I had to carry it in my lap everywhere I went.

BLITZ: You must have gotten some funny looks.

VETO: Nah, I was a fucking legend. You think just anyone has a switchboard that they use to play funny audio clips in real time? Kids were coming up to me for months begging to try it.

VETO: Eventually the doctors told me that having something that heavy on me all the time was fucking up my legs, though.

BLITZ: That's a shame. So you had to stop?

VETO: What, are you kidding me? I was sixteen. I kept it up for another month before the fuckin' educational staff confiscated it. Then I had to stop.

BLITZ: Ah.

VETO: I have this one wired up to my personal library. Funny songs, sound effects, mood playlists, audio clips from movies and stuff... all the stuff I know I want with me.

BLITZ: I did always wonder how you did it so quickly. Especially without looking.

VETO: I have a system.

BLITZ: Is there a trick to it?

VETO: Yeah, of course. I can't flip the switches while I'm in my chair and the case is closed.

[They turn the case on its side, revealing a small keypad with around twenty buttons. Blitz watches, intrigued.]

VETO: Now this is a luxury I didn't have in school. There's another keypad on the other side, too. Back when I started, I had to reach over and flip all the switches myself.

VETO: Eventually I commissioned a gearhead to make me something that I could use while it was strapped to the back of my chair, but it was clunky as hell. The button sequences were a nightmare. Couldn't have it in a case, either. It's like having my whole ass exposed. This one's way better. Protects my modesty.

BLITZ: So instead of reaching down to flip one of many indistinguishable switches, you press several indistinguishable buttons?

VETO: This one's got braille to tell me which button is which. It's way easier.

BLITZ: How do you keep track of the combinations?

VETO: Memorized 'em.

BLITZ: You memorized your entire sound library?

VETO: What? No, I already know that. It's just chronological in the order I got it. I mean I memorized where the switches were and based the buttons on that.

BLITZ: You memorized hundreds of indistinguishable switches.

VETO: Back in school, yeah. I used paint.

VETO: The buttons are just section, column, row. I can play anything in two or three presses.

BLITZ: Without looking.

VETO: Well, yeah. It's under the chair.

BLITZ: ...

VETO: I said I had a system.

BLITZ: Your dedication to minutia is truly awe inspiring.

VETO: I get that a lot. Usually as an insult online.

[Veto moves the soundboard, opening the file library beneath it.]

VETO: Anyways, that's not even the actual collection. That's just the polish on this thing that you show to the crowd. You gotta see the process as much as the finished project if you really wanna appreciate art.

BLITZ: Ah, so we're seeing the workings of the thing now?

VETO: I've got a shitload of music, movies, and show episodes down here in the bottom compartment. I download or record stuff, burn 'em onto physical microfiles, and then stash everything in here.

[They hold up a small, flat black square in an old protective sleeve. It's labeled in simple, messy shorthand "DTBR VS MJ 2".]

VETO: It's not fancy, but it's solid. Literally and figuratively. I've got a bunch more cases upstairs.

BLITZ: It's a shame your interest only extends to cartoons. The children of the world are very lucky.

VETO: Oh, I've got a shitload of other stuff too. I'll take anything.

BLITZ: Really?

VETO: Sure. Just because I don't want to watch something doesn't mean that someone with worse taste won't. I've got a bunch more boxes upstairs.

BLITZ: So you download thousands of movies just in case you run into someone who wants to watch one?

VETO: What? No. I download thousands of movies because everyone wants to watch something, whether or not they're getting brownie points from the government.

BLITZ: Do people actually want these?

VETO: Sure. Turns out people who are on the run from the state still want to have an okay time.

BLITZ: ...Yes, I suppose they would.

VETO: I mean, I don't ask why they can't just rent stuff or use the database. It's not my business. But I can say that there's two kinds of people who's more intense than criminals, and the first is someone who watched a really specific movie once as a kid and has felt empty for the past five years. Those guys are the type who would do a lot to get a hard copy.

BLITZ: Mm. And the second?

VETO: Anime fans.

BLITZ: Of course.

VETO: Or collector guys who want a display case of every single movie from their favorite franchise. Take your pick.

BLITZ: Would you not fit into both of those categories?

VETO: Uh, no, because I go and find my own weirdo shit instead of buying it from other weirdos. I'm like the foundation of that whole ecosystem.

BLITZ: Ah, so you do sell them.

VETO: I mean, copies of them.

BLITZ: And here I thought you were doing this out of the sheer force of anarchist idealism.

VETO: So I like having a source of income. Microfiles are expensive and I can't legally work. Fucking sue me.

BLITZ: I'm sure someone out there would be thrilled to if you get caught.

VETO: I mean, I'm not fucking advertising. You've gotta be smart if you wanna do stuff like this. If you want in on this sort of thing, you have to know someone who's in the know.

BLITZ: Loose lips sink ships, hm?

VETO: Pirates fucking need those ships, man. That's the whole thing.

VETO: I don't charge for digital files, obviously. Pirate networks are a passion project that everyone benefits from. I either sell it in bulk once and let them spread it around as much as they like, or I upload 'em for free.

BLITZ: Including music?

VETO: Yeah, of course.

BLITZ: Even though you're also a musician?

VETO: I'd rather have people steal my shit than have us both get robbed by the fucking industry. If you wanna support artists, help them unionize.

BLITZ: Ah, of course.

VETO: Listen, stealing stuff is a direct transaction. It's clean and wholesome. Having to go through filters means you're dependent on external permission to continue owning what you bought.

VETO: People don't get that, I think. If your files are running on networked tech, your access to it can get revoked. You own what you own until they decide you don't.

BLITZ: And "they" is...

VETO: Plenty of options. Maybe a business call gets made behind closed doors and suddenly everyone has to hand over their personal data to keep your streaming service running. Maybe some asshole who knows more about hacking than you wants to hold your shit hostage to make a quick buck. Maybe your political opinions are getting too much traction and the state decides they want to make your life shit until you crumble. The fuck are you going to do about it if they do? I sure don't know enough about computers to stop them.

BLITZ: Mm. No one does, these days.

VETO: People don't think it'll happen. It can. Inconvenience is a weapon, man, and you're paying to not get hit with compliance. Dependence means you'll always have that hanging over your head. You're trusting a lot of shitty people not to take some pretty important stuff away.

[They toss the file up in the air and catch it.]

VETO: But if you've got the thing in your hand? You know you own the thing yourself. Doesn't matter if someone with power thinks you shouldn't have it for stepping out of line. Pop one of these in a player projector, and you're rolling. The fuck are they going to do about it?

BLITZ: It does flip the power dynamic in a way that seems very you.

VETO: Yeah, you get it. Is that the whole question? Did I miss anything?

BLITZ: Is it beginning to turn into a hoarding issue?

VETO: Uh, no. Every time I steal a movie my thighs get bigger and more sexy.

BLITZ: Denial is a painful thing to watch.

VETO: You literally steal coasters from fancy restaurants.

BLITZ: That isn't hoarding.

VETO: Kleptomania is basically just hoarding's cousin who makes it someone else's problem.

BLITZ: I'm not a kleptomaniac. I'm just curious to see if anyone will stop me.

VETO: So a regular maniac.

BLITZ: I'll accept that description when I start memorizing the silverware.

[squids-and-jellyfish]

The Phantom Thief

decided to try first person with this one. It's different but picks up in the same spot

part 9

Once I was finished buying my seeds, i headed back home with the tiny kitten in my arms. Carrying this precious baby made the walk seem much longer than usual. As I went under the town arch way an odd feeling ran through me. I had to much to do when I got home but sopmething felt very off.  My instintcs told me to turn around and run back to the safety of the small quirkly town. and yet I find  myself taking a step forward, and another. The trees along the path growing larger and looming down on me, the sun turning into darkness. Surely that cant be the case. Almostt back to the farm i swear I can see glowing eyes watching me as I go. Then up ahead like the light at the end of a tunnel the cabin comes in to view. And then the feeling is gone. 

“here we go kitty its okay. See we are home. Its not much but do you like it?” Holding the little guy up to look around. “ theres plenty of room for you to run around and play.” “Meow!” he purrs in affirmation, rubbing his face against mine before pushing out of my arms jumping to ground and running straight to the front door. A bell jingles and chimes as he pats is back and forth on the steps. Huh where did that come from? On my porch pinched in his claws is a silver bell tied around a purple envelope.  My heart drops and my breath catches. Oh no.  Not another letter. Snatching it up tearing at the paper like air, my feet overed in purple confetti. 

“I hope you like your gift! I thought it might be nice to give you something instead of always taking. 

Ps. I attached a bell for his collar. I like to think of it as a necklace though.

-The Phantom Thief”

What the fuck? This psycho broke into my home, went through my things, pretended to steal my jewelry and now has given me a cat. Who even does that? A crazy person that's who.  I could call for the police but what would I say,  hi officer yes I'd like to form a complaint that someone gave me a cat. Yeah that would go over so well. 

Wiping my brow from sweat and dirt I admire the job I've done. My pumpkin rows more of a zigzag that straight lines, the stakes for the eggplants all leaning at an angle but one. I made an attempt to create a design with the corn that came out like something a child would scribble. But it was done. I did pretty decent for someone who doesn't have a clue what they're doing. Fake it till you make it or whatever. More like fake it till you fail it. The last 2 seasons of produce I've tried to grow have ended up being small and flavorless. 

Trailing behind me the kitten jingles as I enter the cabin. He rams into the back of my ankles when I come to a dead stop just inside the threshold.  All the clothes scattered across the floor, neatly folded and sitting on the now made bed. The sink is clean from the days old dirty dishes. A bouquet of sunflowers in a vase sitting in the middle of the table. You mean to tell me I've had a vase this entire time. Wow I don't think this place has ever been this clean, even since before I moved in. I locked the door before taking yet another purple envelope,  this time clipped to a flower, and opening it. 

“You looked so beautiful this morning. I thought a pretty girl deserves pretty flowers.

-TPT”

Did this creep know they were my favorite or was this just a lucky guess. This whole day has been a roller-coaster. Up and down. I feel like I should search if something is missing but honestly I don't think I'd even be able to tell. They did say that they were giving today not taking so I'm sure it fine. And if it's not, I'm too tired to care. 

“what should your name be, I'm thinking maybe Oliver? Do you like that?” he comes and rubs his body around my feet weaving between them. “Okay let's try it out. Oliver. Oliver. Yeah that sounds good.” Now it's decided, I'll head to bed. 

In my pajamas sitting in bed, watching little Oliver play on the floor I glance at my clothes creating a new pile at the food of them bed. Great now I feel like shit for making a mess in my own home. Though I feel more like a guest here. I play with the thought of leaving for my new “house keeper” but nah that's rude. I should clean it up incase they come back and it angers this, stalker. That is what you'd call them right? My eyes wander the room, taking in the potential this place has. I never really noticed it before. With a little personalization it does have a certain charm to it. They settle on a pink food and water set on the ground next to the kitchenette. My eyes pop as realization hits me like smack to the head. “You're a girl! Well Oliver won't due in that case. Hmmm,” tapping my chin as I think to myself. What's a good name for a girl? Observing her features, she's almost white with a brown face and blue crossed eyes, a siamese.  “What about we drop the R and make it Olive? “meow meow!” 

[asidesandbsides]

Miscellaneous and Unsorted, Part 1

Godspell (Original Cast Recording) - Day by Day / Bless the Lord

I'm not very familiar with Godspell, though I did recently listen to the soundtrack for the first time and I have some notion of how the show is structured. Side A is a little worn down, audibly fuzzier and less distinct, which is the usual pattern given that one side is the hit and all. But honestly, I think "Day by Day" and "Bless the Lord" are about equally good songs. I am, however, the kind of person who sometimes thinks B-Sides with tempo changes and other weird stuff should be A-Sides, so what do I know?

Billy Jack Original Motion Picture Soundtrack - One Tin Soldier (The Legend of Billy Jack) - Sung by Coven / I Think You Always Knew (The Theme from Billy Jack)

Billy Jack does sound like an interesting artifact of its political era, and "One Tin Soldier" is definitely a product of that same brew. I don't know how much I like it as a song, but I get it. The instrumental B-Side is nothing special. The record is in decent but not great condition.

Argent - Hold Your Head Up / God Gave Rock and Roll To You

We've seen this A-Side before, but this seems to be a reissue with a different B-Side. On this disc, "Hold Your Head Up" sounds quite haggard, while "God Gave Rock and Roll to You" was covered by such a thick layer of dust that it actually produced a cloud when I cleaned it. Underneath, however, it sounds pretty dang clear! Not an especially good song, but very clear!

Pat Boone - April Love / When the Swallows Come Back to Capistrano

So yeah, that's Pat Boone, singing the theme song of the romantic musical he starred in with Shirley Jones. Apparently, he refused to kiss her on screen because he didn't think his wife would approve. Pat Boone, everybody. The disc is kind of noisy.

Buffalo Springfield - On the Way Home / Four Days Gone

"On the Way Home" is some very agreeable folk rock, paired well with the gentler ballad "Four Days Gone." They are both, unfortunately, a little scuffed up. That's just part of the charm though, right?

Cher - Gypsys, Tramps & Thieves / He'll Never Know

Cher's name has an accent above the "e" on the label here, which is kind of funny. "Gypsys" is a song of the "Love Child," "Fancy" school of social consciousness, though I don't think it quite rises to the level of either of those songs. "He'll Never Know" is a showcase for Cher's impressive pipes, and tells a thematically similar story about the fraught nature of paternity. I think I like it better.

Chicago - Make Me Smile / Colour My World

We've seen this B-Side before, as it as the B-Side of two separate single releases. That's just lazy, Chicago! That said, this A-Side is in strong shape, and it's a pretty cool song. Not many singles are bold enough to include drum solos this long.

The Coasters - Little Egypt / Down in Mexico

A reissue of two Coasters classics, coming in loud and (reasonably) clear. Let's take a moment to appreciate a harmony band that took such broad material and invested it with so much character, without veering into lameness. These guys rock.

Crosby, Stills & Nash - Suite: Judy Blue Eyes / Long Time Gone

You know, I don't think I could have remembered that this was the song that was called "Suite: Judy Blue Eyes." I guess I just forgot what it was called: I clearly have gaps in my knowledge. It is a beautiful song, a little too weathered on this disc but undeniable nonetheless. "Long Time Gone" is also a fine song, but it has a weird popping sound in the beginning that we could all do without.

Crosby, Stills & Nash - Just a Song Before I Go / Dark Star

There's much better quality on this disc, and "Just a Song" has a beautifully warm quality to it. I really like "Dark Star," which has a chill polyrhythm underlying it from the beginning. I've said this before, but it should have been an A-Side.

[kawaiifoxreviews]

A Review is a Powerful Thing, it Can Change Every Thing:

What in the world?

That's right. This fox reviews just about anything. Books are no exception here at KawaiiFoxReviews.

Hello friends, and welcome back. Today we're looking at a book called Voice by Zachariah Roth. These are my thoughts on the subject and why I think it's worth a read. Without spoiling too much, let's voice our discovery.

The Story: Voice is about this character who is strangely isn't named right away. Their gender isn't even specified until way later in the book. Although these things are still confirmed, I felt it was necessary to refrain myself from revealing that information as I am not sure if that is a potential spoiler or not. For now, we'll just call the main character MC. And since this story is about our mystery MC, it was fitting for the author to make this a first-person type of book.

Anyway, the story is this, the MC struggles to find themselves. Typical slice-of-life drama set in a college called Rose Academy. Is this bad? Not at all. I enjoyed the pacing, myself, but it may not jive well for some. However, for me, it became more and more interesting as it progressed.

With the slice-of-life attitude, the story actually meshed with a murder-mystery vibe as well...and comedy...and well...just a little bit of everything.

This fox likes this in a book/movie. For me, it gets boring when the main focus is strictly drama or continuous try-hard jokes or an all-romance diet. I must congratulate the author for trying and placing me on a roller-coaster of emotions.

Oh? In all this talking about this book as a book, I have yet to summarize a story for you guys. Well, my bad. Here it goes:

So, the MC has grown up with their whole entire life with no friends and no family. On top of that, nobody likes/loves this MC. A sadness I myself can relate to in the past. Being alone isn't fun, but, I have learned that it doesn't have to be that way and I'm doing better now because of that fact.

Sorry, my foxy friends, but I'm not trying to make this about me. My point behind this is that a relatable character is nice to have in a story, and it is a reminder that there are people in the world who suffer from this problem. As a fox-friendly reminder: YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

Anyway, with the MC facing this problem, they are met with this girl, whom they have named Voice. Okay, to be technical, Voice is actually a software in the shape of a human girl. Enter Sci-Fi genre. Told you this book had a little bit of everything.

So, what does this mean for our MC? Well, the two become friends. However, the catch is she is linked to all these murders that are currently happening in the story.

I enjoyed this concept, as it pertains to the technology of today, if not, for the future. With the rise of A.I., our safety may be more likely to be compromised. Think Skynet from the Terminator series. Of course, with the little miss Voice, she seems harmless. But, with a small group of students who seemed hell-bent on destroying her very existence, as well as the other forms of the relevant software...it isn't quite clear right away who to trust.

Before you jump to conclusions, consider this:

Is it Voice that needs to be trusted? I mean she must be, since she has befriended the MC. Well that's one way of looking at it. However, how do you know someone didn't just program a software to be so friendly?

What about those students? They seem to know a lot about all this. Also true. But, that doesn't exactly excuse them from being antagonist. All that knowledge could patiently lead to destruction or even self-destruction.

Either way, if you're into murder mystery, this book has you covered. I for one enjoyed it and implore you to read it when you get the chance. It's 324 pages long and 20 chapters. Roughly ten pages per chapter. A nice decent-sized book. You can find it on Amazon and Barnes & Noble. I'll link you below.

If I had to compare this book to other existing franchises or genres, it seems heavily inspired by things like anime and Resident Evil. Basically, any show or game where people take down an organization. (Maybe that's why I enjoyed Voice as much as I did.)

Now, is this book perfect? No. Sometimes, although rare, I found myself finding little errors here and there. Not sure if they are written wrong or my brain is just having a hard time making sense of it. One point, I had to distinguish two different female characters from each other several times. However, I was able to figure it out as I progressed through the story. Again, that may be my brain not understanding.

But regardless, I understood the plot throughout. I had a few moments where I laughed, I was sad, I've even had a moment where I was like, "Wait, what the hell did I just read?" I like it weird, guys, not going to lie. I think it's safe to say, this book delivered.

With how this book ended, it wouldn't surprise me if it gets a sequel. Now, I'm not exactly basing this off the ending of the current book, but what had me was the build up to the end. There was a lot left unanswered and it's got me so super hyped up! Perhaps, we can share the hype once you pick up a copy for yourself. Wouldn't you agree?

One more thing, for discloser, keep in mind these are college students. Expect profanity. Pretty much all the characters use it, except for Voice. And then there's Neru (Nuh-rue). Oh boy, if you can tolerate Neru, then you should be fine. If I had to describe her in a foxy sense...there's just one way I can think of to say it...she's a female pervert. Let your imagination roll with that. ;)

I say these things because I don't have have a problem with them, personally, but I understand that some people might not take too kindly to such things. But this fox wanted to give you a heads up. I guess the profanity was placed considerably. Not once did I find myself overwhelmed with "F this" and "F that". That's always a blessing here at KawaiiFoxReviews.

Final Verdict: This was a beautiful find, fox friends. The story was very intriguing. The characters were unique and full of diversity. The emotional roller coaster-ride was acceptable and kept a firm grasp of my attention. In my opinion, to pass this book up and not allow yourself the pleasure of reading it, you would truly be missing out!

Thank you so much for sticking around till the end, friends. I hope this review finds you well. Before I go, I just want to thank the author, Zachariah Roth, for making such a fun read. I would also like to thank Barnes & Noble and Amazon for the distribution part. Hope to see you all in the next review. Until next time, stay safe. And stay foxy. ;)

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/voice-zachariah-roth/1136771558?ean=9781646280445

[emiri-tezel]

"Ahh.. okay." He was watching his figure? She chuckled lightly. Finding the humour there, actually, and not thinking too much into it. "I will, so if you get me frantically calling you asking you where you are, this will be why." That she had perfected a brownie recipe to die for - chocolate just hit different for Emiri, it's a thought that had her pushing those same ones aside, knowing that she didn't need to run off on a tangent about baked goods when she was really speaking to Cole for a different reason. She wanted to know how he was, how he was doing, how he was coping - or not, he deserved for people to care enough to check in. It's what he did, it's what her dad would have done. Underneath Serkan Tezel's hardened exterior, he was a teddy bear - or more, that's how Emiri would describe him, knowing not only that he cared intensely about everyone inside of the MC, but she knew how he looked at Cole. A guy that while he had his own father figures; he never wanted to see him fall.

She offered a slight smile, "It's what a friend should do." Something she whole heartedly believed in. It's almost like she's shaking off him saying that Logan was lucky to have her, or hell, that they all were, she didn't believe that. It wasn't luck, not really, it was just being a decent human being, or so she thought. Emiri knew what it was like to feel set aside while experiencing grief, losing her dad had been a roller-coaster of emotions and not having her cousin to lean on had been hard. Not that she blamed, or felt bitter towards Taliah, she wouldn't dream of it, not ever. She loved her with her entire being and she understood now why she needed space. The one thing Emiri had taken from it was that if she could help somebody else not feel so alone, she would. She was trying to do that with Logan, all while not wanting to suffocate her.

Listening she keeps herself relatively silent, feeling sad for Cole, hearing that he felt guilty wasn't nice and yet, wasn't that one of the many stages of grief? You had to push, force, scramble your way through them to make it out on the other side. She knew that. "I'm sure you were doing what you thought was right." Letting Cassie go. "Or more, what you thought she wanted." She corrects herself slightly, knowing that the guy sat beside her would break through barriers to help the people he cared about. No she didn't know the ins and outs to why Cassie left town and honestly? It wasn't her business to know. "If you had tried, could you have done anything?" A question Cole didn't have to answer, she had asked just to make him think a little differently, trying herself to imply that sometimes the only person that could save themselves, was that person, outside influence only did so much.

She nods softly, understanding Cole when it came to him thinking of every what if possible, knowing in her heart that that was a normal thing to do. She also felt it was something that tied and twisted with guilt, however, she did believe that eventually he wouldn't be so hard on himself. Seeing Cole on the brink of tears didn't phase her, she didn't find it awkward or think he was any less of a man and him telling her he was sorry, only had her wanting to correct that, "You don't need to be." She wanted to hug him, actually, but thought perhaps right this second wasn't the moment to do so. "You shouldn't have to," pretend that he didn't care about Cassie, she thought he needed to embrace that. "You should visit her after the funeral and tell her everything you never got the chance to say, I talk to dad every week and it was weird at first, but it helped a lot." She wasn't telling him it was a cure to all his thoughts, it was more that speaking those thoughts out loud into a space made her feel lighter, at least. "It'll help you to say goodbye to her."

“Maybe later,” he debated, eyeing the treats in front of him again. “I’m watchin’ my figure,” Cole supplied, holding onto a stern expression for only half a heartbeat before a soft, fleeting yet sly smile managed to break through. Even for as heavy as the air was around them, Emiri had a way of making it feel lighter– just a tad easier to withstand. Cole figured it was some innate thing within her, but whatever it was, he found himself leaning into it and using the moment to set aside all that was weighing on him– even if only for half a heartbeat. “Well, whenever ya do master it, I want a sample, a’right?” Because who would he be if he turned down sweets? The day Cole resisted sugar would be the day everyone eyed him as though some alien imposter had overtaken his body. 

Cole wished he could linger on that– how much simpler would this moment be if all they had to talk about was a fucking brownie and how gooey it was? But he couldn’t deny the elephant in the room because every time he tried, it was like he saw Cassie right in front of him and he couldn’t just push past that, no matter how bad he wanted to. Even so, if he was going to broach the subject, his chief concern wasn’t himself and never would be. Hearing how Logan was doing, he nodded, unsurprised to hear that she was staying busy and occupying her mind as much as she could. It settled most of his worry hearing that Emiri would be there if and when she did hit her breaking point. “She’s lucky she has you,” Cole murmured, offering up a small smile, though the warmth of it didn’t quite reach his eyes the way he wanted it to, “We all are.” He meant that, even if the grief in his voice kept him from conveying it with the level of sincerity he wanted to. Still, it didn’t change the sentiment– Emiri, much like her cousin, was a bright light in the dark. He saw it just like everyone else did and he was glad she was there.

Swallowing thickly as she turned the spotlight onto him, Cole tried his best to slink away from it. Even in the best of times, he didn’t want it. And yet…as he glanced over at her, his cigarette dangling limply from the corner of his mouth, Cole felt like he was safe to express himself around her– like she’d listen to him and know that he was coming from a genuine place. Shaking his head, he breathed out a smoke stained sigh, “Truth is, I just feel guilty, Em.” Cole felt so many things whenever it came to Cassie, but guilt had a way of twisting in deep like a jagged edge and burying itself in the center of his chest. “Like I coulda done more. Dunno if she woulda let me, but I didn’t even try,” he continued, his own disappointment in himself ringing clear in the way his tone dipped and swerved with the confession, “I just let her go.” Cole couldn’t help but wonder what might have happened if he hadn’t. He wasn’t even thinking about it from a relationship standpoint– no, that hardly mattered. He was just thinking of all the ways he might have been able to help, had he not let stubborn pride get in the way. “And now my mind’s just runnin’ wild wonderin’ ‘bout every what if I can think of, y’know?” He mused aloud, inhaling another drag from his Marlboro, though the nicotine did little to steady him the way it usually did, no matter how long he let the smoke rattle around in his chest. “All the shit I never told her,” Cole continued, head shaking again. Had she known that he’d loved her in his own way? No, he could recognize now that he hadn’t been in love with her, but he’d loved her all the same, and he wondered if she’d known that– or felt it, if nothing else. But beyond that, he thought of all the things Cassie would never get to do now and it was that thought alone that had the breath hitching in the back of Cole’s throat and warmth beginning to creep at the corners of his eyes, “All the things she’s never gonna get to experience now– how the chance was just taken from her.” Trailing off once he felt that warmth threaten to spill over, he reached up to swipe at his eyes, always so afraid to let that vulnerability shine through around anyone other than Taliah. “Fuck– sorry,” he muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose as his eyes fell shut and he hauled in a steadying breath. “Know it ended like shit but I can’t pretend I don’t care ‘bout her.”

[fanficparker]

A GAME OF DIAMONDS AND HEARTS // H.O.

>> CHAPTER SIX

“They agreed with each other violently and disagreed with each other pleasurably.” - A Suitable Boy, Seth

(Frenemies to Lovers! Mob AU! ) Harrison Osterfield x Fem!OC

Word count: 2.13k words

Warning: Swearing, guns, knives.

Synopsis: After the sudden death of his uncle and the eccentric multi-millionaire mafia king Lufian Clarke, Harrison Osterfield’s almost decent life is mostly devastated especially when half of what should be rightfully his fortune is transferred to their immediate rival for reasons he doesn’t know. What’s remaining is him trying to figure out how to deal with this collaboration of two rival corporations that don’t belong together and work on the side of the woman he never knew would ever be referred to as his partner in crime while they are dragged into a mess bigger than what they were trained to handle.

<< FIVE [ MASTERLIST ] SEVEN >>

"Who let you enter my private study?"

Harrison asked, stopping with one step inside his office, fixing the watch on his wrist. His eyes focused on the uninvited guest.

"My ability to walk." A smirk played over Sandhya's lips as she flipped a page in the file she was holding, twirling the ball pen between her fingers. The base of the pen rested below her lip as she lifted her eyelid to catch a glimpse of Harrison's irritable face. And damn he indeed was irritated.

"No one comes here without my permission." He hissed, striding into the centre of the room, staring at her furtively until his gaze landed on the other parts of his office. His office was a mess. Not anywhere near how he left it. His file cabinet was open and at least twenty files were lying on the sofa and a few over his desk. There were two on Sandhya's lap as she sat with her legs crossed over each other, leaning back leisurely in one of the chairs, skimming through the papers. An empty plate and a coffee mug were also sitting on his desk. The mug wasn't even placed over a coaster. He could even see some bread crumbs scattered on the wood.

He barely managed to not lash out at her, clenching his fists. Drawing in a shallow breath, he opened his mouth in an attempt to reason with her but she was the first one to speak.

"Can you log into the system? I need to look up something." She pointed the tip of the pen at the computer placed on his desk. Her voice was far from that of requesting even if she framed it as a question.

Harrison's brows pinched, "Are you serious?!" His voice sounded so pitchy, almost resembling a train wreck about to happen.

"Yes."

That's all? His stomach rumbled with anger. She didn't even look up at him. That bland yes twisted like a snake in his gut. He was past taking orders, especially from her. So, he walked up to her, swallowing his building rage and snatched the file she was holding.

"Hey!" She squealed, trying to take it back as he pushed it over his head and out of her reach.

She rose from the chair, about to grab it when he dropped the file on the floor behind his back, scattering the papers.

"Why would you--"

"Because it's my office and those are my files! And fucking," he seethed, trying to keep his voice casual, lifting the mug from the table, "We don't eat in the study, let alone dump the scraps on the desk. Also, you didn't even use a coaster!" He groaned upon noticing the ring the liquid left on the wood before he settled the mug again on the table, only this time there was a coaster beneath it.

Her eyebrows pulled together, disbelief roaring through her head, "You are worried about the coaster--"

"The white oak---"

"The uncle was murdered in this house and the nephew is more interested in coffee stains." She squinted her eyes, shaking her head.

Harrison bit back a groan. Her words had managed to flip his stomach. He sighed keeping his conduct civil.

"As much as I am curious about Clarke's mysterious death," he spoke as calmly as he could, meeting her eyes, "We aren't even sure if he was murdered in the first place."

"You gotta be kidding me!"

"I am not kidding you!" He bit back, "And anyway, get out of here. I don't like outsiders touching my stuff," he shifted his gaze to the side, hands folded across his chest.

She scoffed, almost scornfully. "Says the one who had no problem sleeping together."

Harrison's neck snapped at the words, his temper reaching new heights. Gritting his teeth, he took a step forward, looking down at her face. "If I had known it was you, I would have never--"

"Exactly!" She snapped, "You didn't know who you were sleeping with, how do I ensure you know about the people working here?"

"That's bullshit."

Sandhya exhaled, failing to reason with him. It was harder than she had expected. So, she tried the gentler way, trying to make her words sound closer to a request, "I need you to give me access to your computer." For no avail--

"What made you think I would do that? You have already seen enough." His hands dropped from his chest and she fought back the urge to roll her eyes.

The last attempt at asking and being gentle, "Look Harrison," her voice was sweeter as if she had accepted her defeat, moving to the last resort, "You have already ruined my Plan A and now I need to know about certain things to come up with a Plan B."

"You really think you're some kind of mastermind in planning? Don't you?"

"Harrison, that was my job back then--"

"Oh. I thought your job was to seduce strangers and sleep with them." He didn't hesitate but when the words finally parted his lips, he noticed the light in her eyes dimming for a brief second, the little grin on her lips fading. His heart thumped in his throat. Perhaps, he went too far.

But what he said wasn't a lie. Perhaps, it was okay. He didn't care anyway, yet his eyes moved to her neck, somewhere-anywhere, away from her face.

Those scars on her throat fell into his line of sight. Fine red lines, shallow, peeking off from her pink hoodie. He hadn't paid much attention before but she looked cute in the outfit, a way he had never expected her to look. Her expression defied the notion though, driving his brain back to the thick air that engulfed them.

Her hand came to cover her throat, gently rubbing across the marks. He swallowed. His eyes flickered back to hers and she averted her gaze to the side. Probably, that was the closest he would ever get at marking her.

He was waiting for a reply, a sharp hit back. Instead, the air between them seemed to hum quietly. Harrison had hit the mark so blatantly, Sandhya didn't even bother refuting it. And that somehow bothered him.

She tore her gaze from him, turning on her heel. He felt the urgent need to cut the silence.

"I don't support the idea of a murderer walking among us." He spoke slowly.

He heard her sigh heavily.

"Well enough," she made up her mind, walking away from him and picking up the file, he had previously dropped, "You live in your protected shell, dreaming about sunshine and rainbows while someone stabs you in your sleep," her voice was still without heat or anger, "But you know what..."

She turned to face him again, eyes hardening, "I don't want to die or lose what I have earned so, I'm going to do something about it."

"Good luck." He muttered, eyes never leaving her figure as she stormed off the room.

***

The day was heavy on Sandhya. Checking up all the records of the people Clarke had ever worked with was more time consuming than she had thought, especially considering how her initial plan of dividing the work with Harrison went amiss.

She had navigated through whatever documents he had in his room, along with Clarke's and had taken the help of Holly to get access to their server. It would have been nicer to have her in person than on a phone but she was indeed helpful, although, Sandhya hadn't found anything game-changing. There was at least a compact list of people she had her suspicions on, though.

The library was bigger than what it appeared from afar. Probably they could shoot a Jurassic Park movie in here. Or Night at the Museum or library or whatever. She had laughed at the thought. She had also walked through all three tiers of the magnificent space, analyzing the delicately carved rosewood shelves carrying books older than time. They even had some of the original manuscripts of the classics. Unbelievable.

But now she was tired. It was over six hours, she was sitting there, skimming through all the information she could get her hands on. The mob business was full of mischief. Interacting with people you should definitely keep a six feet distance from was customary .

She sighed, shutting the library computer and keeping the files aside. Untying her hair and pressing her fingers against the pulsing side of her head, she tried to relax. A gasp left her lips. She bet she saw a shadow move outside.

Her heart stopped for a moment when the lights flickered. There was definitely someone who shouldn't be here.

Slowly, carefully, she rose from her seat, ducking down the table. Then she heard it. Footsteps. She scrambled forward, keeping low, hiding behind a pillar, drawing the knife from her clothes. She waited and waited, breathing through her nose. But no one came for her. And then it hit her.

They could be here for Harrison.

She risked a peek, looking outside the library. There was still no one in sight. The alleyway seemed dark, dead; enough to accelerate her pulse. She climbed down the stairs, one foot at a time, letting her eyes wander around the hall. Stopping and hiding behind an intersected wall, she saw it: A guy in all black, twisting the knob to Harrison's room, the haft helpless in the vice of his grip. He entered inside.

Sandhya swallowed. Her throat felt dry. She only had a knife on herself right now. Protecting Harrison at all costs was a requisite. Even when he was an insufferable jerk.

He was a team.

And she hated teamwork.

She also hated jerks.

Harrison turned in his sleep, lying over the left side of his body, hugging the silk sheets that covered him. His room was pitch black, with curtains all drawn shut. He preferred sleeping in the dark and maybe that was the reason why the silver light shining over his thin eyelids discomforted him. He wasn't a heavy sleeper and little sounds managed to bother him.

He had somehow grown accustomed to the noise his clock made. His mind erratically jumped between disconnected, unwanted thoughts whenever he sensed other sounds in his proximity. Sounds that didn't match the rhythm of his clock.

Noises of shallow breathing.

Noises of out of tune footfalls.

Out of tune...

His eyes flew open, wide, fixed on the dagger that stood three feet above his chest, reflecting the minimal amount of light his window shades failed to conceal.

He tried to kick off his sheets but the dagger lunged forward swiftly like a wild animal. He squirmed, unable to move, waiting for the impact. Only that he never felt the object pierce his body. The guy groaned, his steps faltering backwards.

Harrison unspooled himself from the sheets, quickly switching on the lamp. Leaping from the bed, hands first, he landed on his toes, squatting.

Sandhya's arms were crossed around the guy's neck from the back. Wrapping her legs around his waist, she tried to push him back.

"Don't just stand there!" She cried, struggling to hold the big guy as she pulled him backwards, pressing her forearms against his throat.

Harrison shook his head, jumping forward. His heart pounded in his chest as he hit the man over his shoulder. The guy with his face blocked out with a black woollen mask, wailed, stumbling on his feet. He slammed Sandhya's back against the window, dropping both his weapon and the whimpering girl on the floor.

Harrison tried to catch him but he ran, pushing him back, storming off the door. His eyes roamed at the door and then at Sandhya. He sighed, giving out his hand. Grabbing it, she pulled herself on her feet.

"Don't say it." He mumbled, jutting his tongue out of his compressed lips.

"Told you so." She said anyway, voice so low that only he could hear, flashing him a small grin, more of a grimace, actually. His own mouth twisted but then his eye caught the sight of his window, the shades drawn away because of the rustling. His slight frown turned into a scowl.

"Watch out--" He grabbed Sandhya by her waist, pulling her down with him, capturing her body beneath his as a gunshot blasted the window of his room, crashing, shattering the glass over them.

A moment passed in silence as they tried catching up their breath.

"Are we even?" He mouthed, manoeuvring his eye line back up to her face. She was horrified, her chest rising and falling.

"We'll see..."

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Tags: @parkerpeter24 // @its-a-leap-of-faith-kid //@softholand // @annathesillyfriend // @harryhollandsgirlfriend // @miraclesoflove // @thenoddingbunny-blog // @samhollandscupcake // @brokenwhiteboyy // @spidereader //

[hyper-cryptic]

AH LUIS WAS MY FAVORITE, I WANTED HIM AND LEON TO ESCAPE TOGETHER, they had potential and I loved him sm. I’m rlly upset he died. I miss him and LITERALLY NO ONE TALKS ABT HIM

I'M SO UPSET TOO. I'M SO ANGRY THAT HE DIED AND THAT IT SURPRISED ME THAT HE DIED???

I WAS NOT EXPECTING LUIS TO JUST, IDK DIE???

My brain was already like oh hell yeah! Funny character, probably will just be forgotten by the narrative as soon as the game ends but who cares...(I DO. I REALLY DO- And he was lmao)

Anyways I loved Luis and I will never get over him. I am quite happy that he died tho, it's unexpected, it's emotional. It gives the game a bit of spice when they kill a lovable character that wasn't just introduced to help you this one scene and then they kill them off (looking at chopper guy). And I honestly think that RE4 wouldn't really impacted me that much without having that death. Because when I think of RE4, I think of fun gameplay and when I had to take a 10 min break when Luis died because I didn't think he would just die like that, lmao. And that's something I like about RE4, it has a decent narrative and points (But- don't think I don't have problems with it, I have many) where I give genuine smile or I'm destroyed. I like stories being roller coasters! Because...this is a damn zombie game and there's so much death, give me characters to cry about that isn't me thinking too much into Leon.

And going back to Luis, there's a problem with taking him to even more games: his character development was off-screen. When we encountered him he already was going through his redemption arc, he was a nice guy that knew he did something terribly wrong and by helping Leon he completed his arc, and we only knew all of this after he died...very nice there. In next games all we could do with Luis is, well...make him a background character and a cool badass researcher like Rebecca (I don't know much about Rebecca yet so-). But that also means there isn't much else going for him? Again, all he can be now is just a support character that sometimes chimes in and goes heLLO! so um- yeah I'm here now!

Could Luis be a recurring character? Yeah! Would he give a lot to the narrative? yes and no!

Story-wise, he could! He would help with combating Las Plagas and stuff, but game-wise? He would give little to nothing to the games because...his character arc has been completed! He doesn't need anymore because he's a guy who has his stuff clear to him now and he would be given Claire, Rebecca, Sherry treatment! *cries* And I hate the treatment they have! So much!!!

Anyways, a good fanfic would make him totally worth it but I don't have trust in capcom 🤣Hoefully my insane rambling is understandable skjdghfjglf

[baybee45]

Oblivious

A/N: Commander Cody!Medic/clueless reader

Semi based on real life mostly the the parts of being oblivious and wanting to drop kick people. Hope you enjoy.

Warning: Hopefully a bit of an emotionally roller coaster. It’s pretty fluffy y’all.

“Hey” you look up from your paperwork, giving your Commander a nod of acknowledgement. “Would you be interested in going to 79’s? Uhh...Some of the boys and I were going to hangout there.”

“Tonight?” you asked absentmindedly, still thumbing your way through the medical records.

“Uh, yes” he stuttered, swallowing hard to try and clear his throat. You put down your paperwork and notice that he is a bit unsteady on his feet. Without thinking you reach your hand out to check his temperature.

“Are you feeling alright?” Leaning into your touch he replies only with a tittering laugh and his small but warm smile. “Usually I’m the one forcing you to take a break.” You joked, he didn’t appear to have a fever. Giving your Commander a big grin, “Yes, that sounds wonderful.”

Back at your small apartment you’re running a bit behind, mostly due to the fact that you have nothing to wear. Well not exactly nothing, you had your civvie clothes but the boys only have military fatigues and you don’t feel like standing out. So your problem was this; the only clean uniform you had left since your return from the front, was your skirt ensemble and you hadn’t seen that since you were first accepted into the GAR.

“If only I had a bit more of a warning about this outing. My pants would have been pressed and ready to go.” You moaned digging your way to the back of your closet. Finally locating the skirt, you just needed to find some decent shoes. You settled on your go-to matte black pumps, they weren’t too high but high enough to add a nice touch to the outfit. You rush down to street level hailing an Air Taxi, hoping the boys won’t be to far ahead of you.

Finally reaching 79’s you enter the bar, the smell of a good night and rough morning hits you hard. Scanning through the familiar faces of the crowd, you eventually see Waxer waving frantically to get your attention. Cody smiles and gives you a small wave as well and you return the gesture and make your way to their booth. The booth had enough room for the six us but the boys seemed to be squished together at the one end. Leaving a wide opening at the other end next to the Commander.

“Sorry I’m late.” You apologize as you sit down. Everyone appears to simultaneously exhale, spreading out a bit after you take your place next to him. Grinning, he pushes a bright blue beverage with an assortment of fruit on its rim towards you.

“I took the liberty to order you a drink.” Humming in appreciation you take a sip and nod your head in approval.

“You look...pretty tonight.” Commented Boil. “Don’t say it like that! Makes it sound like she never looks pretty.” Elbowed Waxer. You let out a small laugh.

“Your the best Waxer always looking out for me, but its been, what, like six month now? I think I have been around Boil long enough now, to understand what he trying to say, most of the time that is.” You said giving the group a knowing look.

“See!” You heard Boil mumble to his brother, who shook his head. “She’s just being nice.”

“So what were you guys talking about before I came?” The feeling at the table changes drastically. Boil nervously shifts in his spot, Wooley is looking at a very interesting speck on the table, Waxer and Longshot are wide eyeing their Commander. You’d have thought you just asked the boys to shoot their Jedi General with the uneasy glances they were covertly giving you.

“We were just taking about the Ryloth campaign.” Cody remarked like nothing was amiss.

“Ah,” that was a couple month before you joined the GAR you thought. “Well don’t stop on my account, I always love to hear about your adventures.”

Cody grins like a proud ori’vod at his brothers retelling of the Campaign, making only a few correction here and there. Then somewhere between Waxer and Boil finding young Twi’lek girl named Numa and them almost being devoured by some Gutkurrs, the Commanders hand grazes your leg. Your eyes quickly dart down at the sensation. Warm tendrils spread throughout your body. Whidding through you and unearthing a thought, a feeling, you had long ago buried. You quickly push it out, like the unrequited and unwelcome visitor that it is. The boys have always been touch starved and with the added catalyst of alcohol, this wasn't something to be unexpected, just a bit unusual.

This accidentally graze turns into mindless tapping, a slight tick that you had never notice him have before. Eventually his hand is spread wide over your knee, his palm lazily raising and falling to the beat of the story, until it wasn’t. His hand lays idly across your leg, encasing your knee. An overwhelming feeling is starting to seep through, beginning to cloud your judgment.

You wanted to drop-kick the man. Even after all these years, your knee is still uncomfortable sensitive to touch after your surgery. Of course he didn’t know that, so you tried to change the position of his hand ever so slightly. He looks to his other side giving your leg a light squeeze, you wonder just how long they waited for your arrival and how many drinks they downed beforehand for him to be so ‘touchy’. He didn’t look inebriated but you also knew most of the men could hold their alcohol well. It’s not like you minded, just was wondering.

With an amused grin still on his face, Cody endeavours to referee the petty argument that has erupted between Boil and Wooley as of who was closer to being devoured by a Gutkurr.

“I felt the breathe of the kriffin’ beast on the back of my neck before I was able to narrowly escape, jumpin’ down the hidden passageway!”

“Yeah well, I had the things jaw inches away from me, so close that its breath fogged up my visor!”

“You both looked death in the face and survived , its not something new for us clones.” Interceded Cody.

“Well, for what it’s worth, I’m happy that the Gutkurrs didn’t eat you... Wooley.” you teased, sticking your tongue out at Boil as you reached across the table to give Wooley a comforting pat on the hand.

“Yeah well, Wooley would have probably given the poor Gutkurrs an awful hairball.” Retorted Boil with mischievous smirk.

“Hay!”

You start sliding out of the booth and feel the Commanders touch tighten ever so slightly around your leg. “Everyone down for another round?" With your question his hold releases. You blame tingling sensation coursing through you, on your emptied drink already taking affect.

"Do you need some assistance?" 

"No, no Commander you can relax, I got th—" your voice raises an octave as your foot catches something, for a brief moment wondering if you’ve really only had one drink. Luckily Cody was near enough to catch your flailing hand. 

"You sure?" he teased, his touch lingering a moment longer then necessary.

"Yes, I was just testing your reaction time, above average sir." You laughed, trying to gain some composer over your mounting embarrassment. "No worries men, your drinks will be safe in these hands." 

    Dusting the embarrassment off your skirt you embark on your mission, weaving your way through the crowd and making it to the bar in one piece. Placing your order, you decide to reorder that blue concoction the Commander got you. He knew you had a sweet tooth but also like a good tartness to balance things out and you honestly couldn't have chosen a more perfect drink. Sometimes it felt like he knew you better then you did yourself.

“But thats his job isn't? Being Marshall Commander he needs to know his troops.” You speciously reasoned to yourself waiting for your order.

******

“It looks like its going well Commander.” Commented Wooley from across the table. Cody doesn’t respond, his eyes still haven’t left you. Admiring you from a far as you place the order at the bar. He inhales deeply. Reminiscing all the little moments he has shared with you so far.

“What do ya think?” Questioned Longshot. “Like how do you think everything is going so far?” Cody turns his attention back to his brothers, mulling over the question for a moment.

“Good, I think... I mean we haven't really talked much. Just taking things slow...nothing too upfront and obvious. I'm being subtle but she seems very... reseptive...”

“Wow! You’re really struggling.” Wooley states. “Yeah I’ve never seen the Commander so unsure of himself.” Boil pipes in with a wide grin.

They all laugh at their ori’vod and Waxers gives him a a light punch in the shoulder. Cody gives a Commanders’ glare and they immediately stiffen, remembering he has the power to assign them to polish astromech units for the next week in retaliation. Cutting the silence Boil wonders out loud

“Does she know that this is a date? Or does she just think we are all hanging out?” Cody doesn't have time to respond as you make your way back to the table drinks in hand.

******

Taking a few sips of your drink you maneuver through the crowd with relative ease. Making it safely back to your booth, you place the drinks on the table.

“See boys! Safe in these hands.” you giggled with one hand on your hip and the other doing a ‘jazz hand’. The Commander chuckles and gives you smile could light up the whole of Coruscant. You loved h—....You liked seeing him smile and happy like this.

“ I always feel—“ Codys’ remark is cut short when you feel a light tap of a gloved finger on your shoulder. “Kix!” you squeal jumping into the troopers arms, he lifts you off the ground slightly swinging you back and forth. “How are you?” 

“I’m doing great!”

“Do you wanna dance?” 

“Uh, yes of course.” Not that it would have mattered what you said. Kix barely gives you enough time to respond before he is pulling you away.

"I guess that answers my question." You caught Boil saying as Kix guides you towards the dance floor.

Swaying distractedly to the music you and Kix play catch up. You wished the hands of time didn’t move so fast. You remember like it was yesterday when you first got accepted and placed on field assignment as a medic, Kix was your mentor. He taught you the difference between hypothetical situation and reality. That what the books taught and what happened in the real world didn't always line up. He was your first and oldest friend in the GAR.

*******

“It's okay Commander...” Waxer let his sentence trail off. Their Commander wasn't saying anything but everything about him said he wasn’t okay.

Cody was lost in his thoughts, replaying the night. Going through and analyzing each moment. Trying to figure out what went wrong. When it went wrong. How he didn’t see this coming. He thought it was going so well. You letting him place a hand on your knee, and then you moved it to rest on your thigh. He replayed the scene again in his head.

You moved it.

“I had to look away so you wouldn't notice me blush.” He thought. “And then that damn skirt, like you didn't know how it was hugging your curves. Isn’t that why you didn't want my help to get the drinks? It was an invitation to watch you. Oh men, did I watch...You were flirting with me weren’t you?” He wonders silently. The Commander looks back to you and notices the blue marking on the troopers armor. This meant that what’s his name.

“Kix!” he practically snarls under his breathe, is part of the 501st. Cody makes a mental note of this. He was going to talk to Rex later about this trooper.

“You know sir, if you want her you have to fight for her." Pointed out Boil “But not really ‘fight, fight’. More Like ask her to dance kind of fight is what Boil is trying to say.” Clarified Waxer.

“Like you’ve said before sir, ‘there is always a way.’” Wooley said giving his Commander a half smile for encouragement and the other all nod their head in agreement. 

Cody balls his hands into a fist and releases them several times. Almost like he is trying to pump the blood for his dying heart. He gulps back his second drink of the night to steady his nerves and finally stands, taking a few tentative steps forward. You had never looked more beautiful. Never looked so happy. Never looked at him like that. He hears you laugh at something the trooper is saying. It cuts through his chest like a blaster bolt.

*******

“Awww Kix! I’m so happy for you, she sounds very nice. You better introduction me to her.” 

“I will, I will.” he promises. You give his neck a loving but firm squeeze to make it clear “I’d prefer sooner rather then later.”

“I will I said! Just gotta make sure she knows she my girlfriend first.”

You laugh and shake your head grinning . Such confident men on a battlefield but most are lost puppies when it comes to human interaction that’s not their brothers. You guess it's a by product of how they have been raised on Kamino.

“It's so good to see you again.” You smile, bringing your focusing back to your friend.

“It is good to see you again, even though I feel like I'm about to get beat up.” 

You scrunch your eyebrows at him and look to your sides. Kix spins you so your facing towards your booth. Your confusion growing more and more. You don't see anything off. No one in particular itching for a fight. The only thing you notice is Cody returning to his seat.

“What are you talking about? Who’s going to beat you up?” You asked puzzled. He ignores your question, opting instead to quickly twirl and then dip you in one fluid motion as the song ends. You give Kix a ‘I’m going see you again soon’ hug and head back to your boys.

“The guys at the 501st miss you, don't be a stranger.” You turn around to face Kix again. “I’d prefer sooner rather then later.” He quips. Half rolling your eyes at him you mouth ‘I promise’. You did miss the boys at the 501st. They definitely kept you on your toes but you enjoy the relative peace and calm of the 212th. They feel like a home away from home.

******

You sense a change as you sit back down. Not sure what it is but definitely a tension in the group now. You assume Boil made and ill advised joke at the expense of one of his brothers. Distracting yourself, you bob your head to the music finishing the last of your cocktail.

“I forgot how much I like to dance.” You said trying fill the quiet that has engulfed the group. “Kix is such a sweetheart. He helped shape me into the medic that I am... And now he has a girlfriend! Hmmm, time is one of those things that never slows down, not stoping for anything.”

“He has a girlfriend?” questions Boil, thankfully stopping you from rambling on any further. All the others were equally interested in this tidbit of gossip, all except the Commander, who seems worn out from his day, with his head slightly bowed and his eyes closed.

“Yeah and she sounds like a sweetheart, I told him that he better introduces me to her soon.”

“Would you like to dance?” Muttered the Commander, his question rushing out like one long word.

“Yeah, it’s a lot of fun.” you replied catching only the tail end of what he said, completely oblivious to his request.

Waxer nudges his ori’vod softly and he takes a deep breathe to musters up his confidence once more. “Will you dance with me?”

“Yes.” You softly answer without hesitation. Placing his hand on the small of your back he leads you to the dance floor. He tentatively wraps his arm around your waist bringing you in close and as if on cue the music slows and the room seemingly quiets. You look up to meet his gaze. He gives you his small, warm smile, a smile you had seen hundreds of time before. But now? Now it has a hidden meaning. Like secret code that only you have, always had, the key to. Delicately he moves you to the music, holding your hand over his rapidly beating heart.

Your own heart in sync with his.

The feelings you had tried to keep at bay, rush through you with every heighten pump of your heart. Breaking through the barriers you had built like torrent flood waters. Every reason why this can’t work and each regulation you’ve reread is drowned out. This emotion, one that you would not yet dare put a name to, washes over you in pure and beautifully simple waves.

You two are alone in the crowded bar, safely hidden in the privacy of each other eyes. Overcome you kiss Cody. You kiss him and he reciprocates the gesture, tenderly cupping your face deepening the kiss. You are oblivious to four overly enthusiastic troopers cheering in a booth. Oblivious to a 501st medic wondering were his introduction was. You are oblivious to everyone and everything but the man in front of you.

And for a few perfect moments time standstill.

[rpmemesbyarat]

RP Meme Lines from "AHS: Coven" Episode 8: "The Sacred Taking"

You don't go home till I say.

Make me fight for it

I'll carve you up in big thick slices, then plug every hole you got.

[NAME] set me straight.

You were never my friends.

You don't see me bitching out.

[NAME] filled my head with that bullshit, too.

That bitch will say anything if it gets her what she wants.

This isn't for you. Yet.

You just killed an innocent man!

This town ain't big enough for the two of us.

War is coming. And you're gonna lose.

I used to think I understood pain.

My body doesn't belong to me

The doctors say it's terminal.

Die before Thanksgiving, so none of us have to suffer through that mess of raisins and Styrofoam you call stuffing.

They say love is the best medicine.

You are so beautiful.

You're just a fool in love.

You like the way I look, take a picture.

I don't want you watching me decay.

Are you scared?

I'm not scared of dying.

I'm scared of living like this.

I wouldn't give anyone the satisfaction of me killing myself.

I'll stay alive just to spite them.

I just have to figure out which one of those little pecker-heads it is.

They worship the devil.

Look what they did to you.

You don't get it! They saved me!

Nothing happened in that house.

You brought this on yourself.

You had no business going that house.

You're unclean.

Take off your pants.

She's hurting him.

Let's get back to the battle plan.

I want to slit her throat.

You have to stay hidden until it's time.

She cannot know you're back.

We have one shot. That's it.

Our plan has to be flawless. So does the execution.

Failure turns this into a suicide mission.

You have to save me.

I knew the world could be a dark and evil place.

I tried to disappear into nature. But I have been found.

Aw, you probably have no idea where you are.

You've been through a terrifying ordeal, but you came back.

The cicadas have stopped singing.

Somebody is looking to kill me.

You were set on fire and left for dead.

Whatever troubles you had, they are ours now.

Don't worry. You're amongst friends.

I thought I'd never see you again.

Given my wretched appearance, maybe it's a good thing you're blind as a butter knife.

How did your hair grow back so quick?

What have they done to you?

I've lost my eyes.

Our journey starts today.

We're gonna be busy all night.

Why can't he watch porn and jerk off like any other guy?

Be good, baby.

We'll have fun later.

I feel like a queen.

You thought it was you, didn't you?

Well, I knew it wasn't you

It could be any one of us.

It's not a gift. It's a burden.

Now, give me your hands.

We're ready to begin.

Can you imagine those poor Salem witches, traveling all the way down here in covered wagons without a proper charcuterie platter or a bidet? Absolutely savage!

Does nobody see the flaw in this plan?

I just love this room, especially the walk-in closet.

I need that.

Surprise, bitch.

I bet you thought you'd seen the last of me.

How soon can you have all of your stuff out of here?

I really need my own room.

I can't wait to break it in.

What are you?

Who brought you back?

Looks like you've got some 'splainin' to do.

We all know the playbook on this.

I'm gonna bring marshmallows and graham crackers to make s'mores.

As my powers grow, yours fade away.

Let me break this down for yo, and stop me if I talk too fast; I'm in, you're out.

You can swallow these pills and go to sleep. Stop suffering. And stop our suffering. The choice is yours.

Is everyone back from the dead, or have I already died and gone to heaven?

That's not one of the choices, darling.

I have finally found someone I belong to. Someone I truly love.

No details, darling. I couldn't bear it.

I am very ill, [NAME]. I won't last long.

You haven't thought through this, [NAME]

You're still my beautiful angel.

This dream of a perfect love you're clinging to is just a nasty trick life is playing on you.

You will die the same way you lived your life; alone and disappointed by everyone.

What's the matter?

He won't stay till the end. They promise, but they don't.

You are nothing but an envious old bitch.

This whole room smells of death!

I'll die soon. I promise.

How'd it go?

Why can't it be me?

You have no style and your pits smell like fish sticks.

You guys suck balls.

Come hold this mirror for me.

Life is a carnival, [NAME].

I was so crazy about him.

Some play it safe on the merry-go-round, others go for the thrills on the roller coaster.

I mean, I could sit here and boo-hoo my choices, torment myself over the selfish detours I have taken. But what good

would it do now? Hmm?

Do me a favor, get me my fur from the closet.

It was preemptive, I suppose, my leaving. Get out of town before they run you out on a rail.

I've always been rigorous about not staying too long at the party. Bad form.

Know when it's over.

I could never pull off the corals.

You need to take this. We must purge you of this poison.

I was murdered.

I see everything.

I am finally trying to do something decent

You're making a martyr of yourself by giving up.

You've been tricked.

I won't permit it.

I don't understand.

They've been running a number on you.

They've been leading you to your doom with lies.

You've always been my silent sentinel.

Ain't they feeding you?

Whatever did I do to deserve this betrayal?

Didn't you like my pot pie and my peach crumble I learned how to make just for you?

You put me in here.

You can get me out.

This cage is just unfit for a human. Which is why it's so perfect for you.

You know, when I had the idea to have you brought back to me, I thought of all the many ways I could dispose of you. But I've found it give me great pleasure just to know you in a cage.

I'm not your damn maid!

I wouldn't be so eager to show my arrogance from that side of the cage.

What you gonna do? Kill me? I can't die.

Eh, throw me back in the box.

I seen enough of this world.

You think I only have those two choices?

The mistake you make is from a lack of imagination.

I'm not afraid of you. I wouldn't give you that satisfaction.

This gave me no satisfaction. But we've only just begun.

How dare you come into my house after what you've done.

Stay away from her!

I made you and I can unmake you.

Don't leave me!

It's Schubert's last sonata. It's all about acceptance of death.

This is so incredibly stressful and weird.

You don't feel anything?

My stomach feels like a storm's about to hit, but it's probably just my nerves.

I'm not exactly what you call a natural born leader.

Your feet should be getting warmer.

I'm told it starts as a tingle in the cooch.

You can't be in here.

We're under attack.

None of us are safe.

I might have slept until noon.

You didn't really make this coffee all on your own, did you?

If you're waiting for me to get down on my knees and beg for your forgiveness, you can forget it. It's not gonna happen.

Now you're proud?

[comfysadhoodie]

Love - it breaks you. Read my story :)

I fell in love. It wasn't as magical as it is shown in artistic viewpoints, but it surely had it's things. What was I looking for? I was looking for an escape - an escape from the life I was living. After every depressing episode between my parents and my family, I was looking forward to text her, to talk to her and just chat away my anxiety, my feelings. She started making me feel happy, giddy, and what not.

It soon grew, however, in a matter of a few months - I failed to acknowledge any other females around me. They just weren't anything for me! She is the best! She still is.

Here's my story of discovering Love, and breaking myself in the process.

It started on April 15. I just turned 16 on 2nd April (yes, that just really was close.) I was an introvert, and a freelancer. A weird combination if you ask me, but all I did in a day was listen to my parents' rants, see them fight, get occasionally beaten up by my father if he had taken a bottle down his throat - and apart from all of this I would freelance and save up money. I won't go into how much I made, I won't go into what I did with it (Maybe a little...) but the thing was, I never knew what love meant. In the past, I had crushes, I had girlfriends - I was fooling around with girls, holding hands, talking to them in school...but it never was something serious.

Well, the day our online school started, it was my English Period. Our teacher asked us to introduce ourselves one by one. My turn came, and being the introverted anxious guy I was, I took a very bold approach.

" Hey everyone. My name is "comfysadhoodie" and I am an introverted person, I'm trying to get over my social anxiety. Even though I'm shaking right now I'll try my best to tell you guys about myself. I am a student -" I proceeded to talk about my freelancing journey, and a little bit about my past educational and extra curricular matters. Where I live, English is not a primary language and anyone that could speak fluent english was considered a smart and educated person. Hence, I got some traction.

Many classmates messaged me, except one that slightly drew me subconciously. It was Sue, my classmate. She initiated the convo because I had a #TokyoGhoul pfp, anime watchers will relate :) we talked for the first time, and I thought to myself, she seems cool. We became friends.

Now, hey, for her, an extrovert with over 200 followers on Instagram, I was just another leaf on the tree. But for me? A person, who literally does not interact with anyone, had no friends at that time? She was my "FRIEND!"

We bonded over random topics, becoming best friends over the span of a few months. A few key events changed me, influenced by the feeling of love...and me being suicidal.

I tried to attempt suicide around July last year. It was a weird attempt, I wanted to do it but I wanted to live. I wasn't sure. It was a rushed decision. An idiotic decision. One of the biggest mistakes I have made. I jumped, due to some reason I still don't know, I hit a tree instead of the crossroad below, and instead of seeing the Sacred light, I broke my four of my ribs, my right hand's shalt bones, and the broken ribs, in the near future, lead to a condition called Pneumothorax where the sharp end of broken ribs can puncture the lungs.

I know, right? What a turn of events.

You can come at me in the comments, tell me I made the wrong decision, I already know though. It was the STUPIDEST THING TO DO!

I was administered in a good hospital, my savings (somewhat decent. Trust me, I was working my ass off for clients :P ) leading to financing my three surgeries to join the ribs through Rib Fixation (I'm a med student soon :P so I kinda researched things for knowledge). I could just think about Sue while there. My screen time was somewhat less, so all I could think was to talk to her and relax. She used to make me feel happy.

Time passed, I was somewhat healing around August.

September was a Roller Coaster for me. From 15th September, we started chatting for hours, everyday. I was happy, I could be closer to her for quite a long time. Soon, we started calling occasionally too, once a week. I loosely told her I had a crush on her in August end, I never thought she took it seriously, she even outright said so too.

Due to some changes (namely her best guy friend telling me he loves her too and me panicking that he might take her away from me) I decided to confess in all seriousness that I had fallen for her on 25th September. I remember dates quite nicely. A boon, and a bane. She replied after some time, around 4 hours. I was panicking, but she said that she needs me to focus on studying, and she sees me as her best friend, nothing else. It was an acceptable response, but still, she did not turn me down, because she would say things like, "I'm confused".

We casually dragged the topic for a few days more, from 25th September to 16th October. She decided to end it in a fabulous way. She called me, around 2 pm, after hyping this convo in the name of " I need to tell you something, it's nothing serious tho, just wanted to talk about something. " I have a duality inside me. Optimism extreme, and the other one is super pessimistic. I was thinking, maybe she will tell me how much I suck, but at the same time I was thinking she is shying to tell me she likes me 😂 I know right, suck it up, bud.

Well, the worst happened.

She calls, and says, Hey, You're a really good person, and I thought you deserve a fair chance, and that's why I was talking to you for hours for days. I was trying to analyse the situation, and even after tryingggg to feel something for you, I couldn't.

the last sentence broke me.

I mean...I was that Unlikeable that even after trying she could not like me?

Huh.

My moving on journey began.

I could not forget her, though, of course. I would text her just once, for five minutes, everyday, to check in how she was doing.

Suddenly, around 24th October, something took over me and I started to ask her what went wrong. We were chatting somewhat more, she would tell me how her mom thought of me as a nice person based on her explained description. That was an obvious joy of a news, seeing her family approving of me in a way.

Due to some school work, I was supposed to be around where she lives. We struck up a plan to meet at her house, so I could meet her mother and her sister.

I was trying to act cool, but the thought of seeing her outside school was making me tingle. It was a great meet. I wasn't much anxious during the convos, and the best part was, she seemed happy.

I went home, and the next day in school, we talked about the meetup we had. We chatted away in person, I broke the touch barrier too by putting my hands on her shoulders from the back. It was a spur of the moment thing, I didn't do it on purpose...just subconciously, it happened.

I reached home by 3 PM, and got freshed. We started chatting, and she was acting a little...different. I talked to her, told her she can be honest and tell me what's going on. At 4:20 PM (nice) she told me she has started to like me.

The duality struck again as she proceeded to tell me about her rules that we would stay in touch till we're 18, and then date each other. She even went as far as to talk how she would have "coitus" after engagement.

I was thinking, she's just telling her rules. Then I was thinking, does she like me enough to think about engagement too?

Oh, I'm going off topic. Anyways, I was happy. But in just two weeks she had begun to like me...that was weird!

What ended up happening was, we started talking, flirting on texts, it lead to us calling a lot more too...

Well, my dad is here. You know the drill. I'm sorry, I'll continue the spicy bits in part two.

I'm really sorry :) Hoping someone finds this