#i'm still the same
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Lyra, my beloved cat of 13 years, passed away this year on Father's Day. She's been by my side through very difficult times and was my little rock of steady and unrelenting love. I struggled a lot drawing this, and struggled a lot posting it, but I know I would've wanted to read a comic like this that validated my grief for her when I lost her.
Wherever you are, Lyra my little summer star, I love you always! Thank you for being the best thing in my life.
#my art#comic#comics#pet loss#grief#dealing with grief#truly did not think I would survive her loss#it has been very difficult if I can be honest#it's been 6 months and I still cry most days#But currently I have a foster cat in my home#She's not at all the same as Lyra#But I'm learning the capacity of my heart to grow larger to allow another cat to live in it#my heart is a home to many cats
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Keep seeing that post where OP starts like 'Thinking about...grieving the undead' and then adds on about like. Real life situations where people have not died but have left your life and you would have reason to grieve them.
All respect, that's an important concept, but that is not what I am thinking about when I read 'grieving the undead'.
#your brother is a vampire. he's sitting across the table from you chatting with your mother about her day#and he's dead and he's gone and he's never coming back.#he laughs the same and he talks the same but his arm is cold when he grabs you in a headlock and your dog won't be in the same room with hi#he'll still hang around watching TV with you and give you wedgies and make stupid jokes#but you can't tell him about the bullies at school anymore because this thing with your brother's face will just find them and kill them.#and not even stupid fucking Jason deserves what the monster in your dead brother's skin would do to him.#your brother is dead and lost and right there in arm's reach and gone forever with no hope of ever getting him back.#i'm sure there are corollaries to be written about like ghosts and zombies but this is the one i'm personally hung up on recently
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I won't deny I've got in my mind now
all the things I would do
So I'll try to talk refined for fear that you find out
how I'm imaginin' you
#I'm having a coloring identity crisis#i spent way too long on this#and i'm still not 100% happy#but at the same time i'm also so happy with how the lineart came out#oh well#zelda#the legend of zelda#zelink#breath of the wild#botw#tears of the kingdom#botw zelink#royal guard link supremacy#my art
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the gang's all here! commence slumber party
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 13 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 13 spoilers#kutsurogi my room#silver vanrouge you fashion ICON#i can't believe this is canon. i'm weeping. this is incredible#nothing is more in-character than silver wearing grey sweatpants and a vintage 80s disney princess sweater#the same grey sweatpants and vintage 80s disney princess sweater that he's been wearing since he was eight probably#how do i get this sweater in real life. hey twst. twst c'mon#i can't decide if it's funnier if lilia gave this to him or if silver picked this out himself#actually funniest option: malleus gifted this to him as a sincere celebration of briar valley's proud history and associated legends#oh MAN i hope we get sweater lore in the story. forget everything else this is the only canon that matters to me#my keys still haven't fully recovered from knight silver but i'm gonna have to at least try. pray for me guys 🙏
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i keep thinking about how rfk said that autistic people "will never write a poem." i keep thinking about that, about if humanity is calculated on the back of old verse. how far we measure personhood is in baseball and stanza breaks.
i keep thinking - i have over 7k poems on here alone. language can be a special interest, after all. did you know the word autism comes almost direct from the greek word autos, meaning "self"? self-ism.
maybe he is right - i haven't really played baseball. i was a ballet dancer instead. and besides - my sister once accidentally hit me in the face with an aluminum bat. i'm not sure if the injury gives me half points. am i only a person in the dugout? hand in a mitt? swinging?
does softball count? does cricket? am i a person if i throw the ball to my dog. am i a person as long as the ball is in the air, or do i stop being a person as it rolls into the bushes. i took my girlfriend to fenway recently; was i a person in the sun, with my hands up, with the game laid out at my feet in a diamond. i felt like a person, but that was back in the summer, and i often feel my most person-like then.
am i more of a person because of the sheer number of things i've written? does quality matter, or is it quantity? i used to write entire books every summer in high school - i wasn't doing well. i felt the least like-a-person back then. but then - does any person feel human in high school?
in the library, ink on my skin, i feel personhood shutter at the edges of myself. actually, writing feels blissfully like not being myself. it feels birdlike; escaping into creation so my body dissolves and i survive only by muscle memory. i am not there, i am writing.
but who can deny the falconlike focus of warsan shire, the tenderness of mary oliver, the sheer skill of amanda gorman. those are poets. they are certainly human. you could line them up with the way their words have influenced us and measure their literary shadows like wings.
perhaps it was very assumptive of me to want to be a poet rather than "a [ label ] poet." i wanted the work to fill itself in, rather than be stained by what i am. i do not write in despite of my neurodivergence, i am just neurodivergent and writing.
does the poem have to be in english or can i send it through my palms into the coat of my dog. does the poem have to make sense. does the poem have to love you back.
if i break a glass, will the poem appear naturally? or is the act of breaking the glass human-enough. the shards of my life glittering out beneath me - do i have to write the poem, or is it self-evident in the pile of glass splinters? i cannot grasp this world the way other people can. regardless, i endeavor to touch - even the mess - very gently.
i broke my toenail against my coffee table recently. i released a bug outdoors. i made coffee. i walked my dog.
i didn't write a poem about any of these things.
something else, then. existing without humanity.
#how many poems would one have to write to walk through the gates of their own humanity#so it is just writing and not a miracle.#as if writing is ever anything except miracle - all creation is divine.#writeblr#poetry#i am almost certain i have written more poetry than most members of the presidential cabinet#so maybe i am MORE human?#... but alas.#perhaps BECAUSE i'm a poet- i do not like the idea of measuring my own humanity against theirs#they are people. many terrible people are unfortunately still people.#i know i cannot touch this world in the same way other people can.#but i still.... i lay down in the glass shards#i let it into my hair.#i don't like talking about this part of me and i rarely write poems about it.#it is sharp here. i thought that you liked how sharp it is for me. you've been running your hands through the blood#when it was painful enough.... even YOU might have called it poetry
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thanks for being a friend
[ jojamart mockumentary #17 ]
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#stardew valley#stardew valley fanart#sdv sam#sdv jodi#jojamart mockumentary#my art#i'm still on a slowdown for work and school#but i'm working on these when i get some spare time at night#it's how i get my fun in#also this is based on the fact that jodi sends you the recipe for ice cream at seven hearts#and adds that it won her first place in a competition#she says the same thing when she sends you the calamari recipe but i'm not drawing tentacles for free
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the return of captain poppy space babies >>> the story and the engine
#doctor who#dwedit#space babies#the story and the engine#mine#i get it i too am still haunted by space babies from time to time#anyway. man imagine if they didn't film poppy's new scene with a 2005 potato and you could actually see her clearly#i'd considered giffing the credits too so you could see that it is poppy (and the same actress) but i'm too lazy#anyway this episode hit me with at least like 3 rumors/spoilers that i didn't expect to materialize in the ways they did#absolutely no idea what to expect from the next episode at this point
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She's not like other girls
#She's suppose to be just making a pose but she kinda looks like she's crawling out of the ocean lmao#Making quick messy backgrounds is my drawing warm up now. Seems to have the same effect as drawing circles to me anyway#Also wanna study the anatomy of this weird pose from this meme#And tbh. I still don't get it. XD#Steven Quartz Universe#Connie Maheswaran#SU#Steven Universe#my shiz#connverse#I'm not like other girls meme#meme#I'm not like other girls#I like how Connie's hair had hung like a curtain when wet (and when lying down it looks like a puddle) I have had wished to see that again#I think her hair was long enough to do that again in The Movie and in Future#skedoobles
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I remember not wanting to become a teenager back when I was a child because I thought adults were lame and miserable. How incredibly perceptive of me
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top part's bc i wanted to design a little sticker for myself - couldn't resist adding a little smooch (:< 2-for-1 combo of a little more of a size difference than i usually go for and the pointy ears @poly-hebdo draws derek with because it's cute as fuck
[find this and my other art on Redbubble!]
#teen wolf#derek hale#stiles stilinski#sterek#my art#drawing in this style (colored lines w/o pressure sensitivity and v simple shading) made me super nostalgic for my one piece era lol#did this in 10-minute breaks between moving and working the past few days#today is my first day off where I'm not out of the apartment from 8am-6pm in 3 weeks#time to DRAW#thought I'd throw a morsel out to the size difference crowd lol#I could get behind stiles having a late growth spurt post-nogitsune bc hey lack of sleep interferes with growth in adolescents#but almost-same-height-slightly-different-build is still my main squeeze
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spiritual successor to this absolute banger by @kokirizeldas and also. 👯 them.
#my art#I SO DESPERATELY NEED TO DRAW REAL THINGS..........#I'm still feeling art struggle bus so every time I think I'm just gonna do a quick thing I spend 5billion years instead smh#with that second one I was sketching out a massive thing and then slapped myself over the wrist to shrink it down and go simple#it's cuter like that anyway so why did I immediately forget to do that again !!!#colour struggle is happening I'm trying new stuff...#ALSO I just think Zelda can do rly good unsettling stares 😏#stares at you directly without blinking autism vs oof eye contact autism idk#it Is about actual telepathy ofc. same thing.#JEAN THIS IS NOT ME GETTING YOU BACK BTW this is just. one of my many detours... I have real things !!#tloz#a link to the past
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Another quick doodle
#they just bathed#what're they lookin at#I'm trying to learn to draw faster and practice anatomy at the same time lol#anatomy is probably still kinda off but I'll notice it later 👍#one piece#black leg sanji#roronoa zoro#zosan#zosanzo#<uh kinda#femji#femzoro#yuri zosan#yuri zosanzo#my art#doodles#cw nudity#tw nudity#let it pass bit t pls
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my roman empire is that jason thought he was good friends with hazel, considering that jason probably welcomed hazel when she first came to camp jupiter, but in HOH hazel said she would rather be in a room with anyone else but jason. their potential for friendship just went down the drain. why rick :(
#I'm not blaming hazel (I love her sm) but I just found that scene heartbreaking :( their friendship was never the same again 😭 tragic#she was intimidated by jason and still hadn't forgiven him for the nico situation but jason didn't know that and thought they were good :(#rick should've expanded more on their baggage#they were just kids#pjo#pjo fandom#percy jackson#pjo series#pjo hoo#jason grace#pjo hoo toa#hazel levesque
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i wasn't sure exactly what i thought adult gideon should be doing, but i DO quite like the triple combination of cowboy-biker, drag queen, and used car salesman at the same time. she's always a busy person!
#gravity falls#gideon gleeful#it's a way for him to still perform and sing and express himself!!!#i also just love trans girl gideon headcanon in general but this is almost sort of my middle ground here#i think anything is fun... drag queen... genderfluid... transedgender...#i'm still not sure how i wanna do his body type and height and stuff cus i like him both short and huge#but i think his voice should stay exactly the same like thurop#i'll probably come back to this another time and reput some of this info on my art blog#i'd like to either think of a pun with gloria or have that as well as a drag name#theo was thinking morning glory as a name she could use#isnt it cute both mabel and gideon have star motifs#art
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technically a FR dragon, but also just a really cool design. doodle of eearz's seraph
new watermark because this went on my bsky
#i had this oc saved in my inspiration folder for a couple years#and then all of a sudden realized it was 1. FR and 2. I'm in the same server as eearz#so I was incredibly excited to draw it. I absolutely LOVE this thing#still trying to venture into posting more non FR art... INTIMIDATING...............#flight rising#flight rising art#dragon#my art
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TMA Trevor would want TMAGP Trevor dead for being a posh prick. TMAGP gives me the impression that he'd want TMA Trevor dead for being homeless.
#What a down grade honestly#But also it's crazy how different he is#No one else has been this different#Gertrude was basically exactly the same#Basira “I''m reading alchemy for fun since I'm a prisoner here and bored” is probably better suited to education that being a police office#Helens freaky in how similar she is#Gerrys different but he's still an artist living with Gertrude. He seems dimmer but also he got experimented on by MI (unofficially)#the magnus protocol#tmagp spoilers#tmagp#magnus protocol#the magnus protocol spoilers#tmagp 28#tmag28 spoilers
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