#i'm reading a shit ton (other big goal)

[the-magicians-ravens]

thought my resolutions were crazy but after 1 month? it's going better than expected

[mackeydoodledoo]

She Wears Short Skirts, I Wear T-Shirts: Chapter 1

Pairing: Bridget (Cheerleader AU) x (Fem!)Reader

Chapter Summary: Being in band wasn't the most popular among the student body... Being in a band was: everyone in that school fawns over students who are in a band. You and your friends are the only band in the entire s. But, none of them know... You live two different lives: Drum Captain by day, Drummer by night. The school's Cheer Captain happened to attend one of your shows...

Chapter Warnings: Anxiety, Swearing

Chapter Key: Italics = Thoughts, +*+ = Time Skip, F/n = Friend's name, B/n = Band Name, Bold/Italic = Flashback

Chapter Theme: Honest - The Home Team

A/n: I read somewhere that someone (I forgot who, so idea credit goes to them) wanted a Bridget Cheerleader AU, so here it is :)

------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Y/n's POV* You ruffle your hair after stepping out of the band room; about to leave the school after a successful football game, however, bump into the wall after a football player shoulders you.

"Whoops, sorry nerd!" He chuckles, walking off with his jock friends

"You alright?" F/n asks

"Yeah," You sigh, "I hate that they're so successful, yet in real life, they're jerks..."

"They're going to peak in high school when they graduate," They tell you, "Besides, we have a gig tomorrow night."

Ahh...

Your 'second life'. Your most favored part of your life over your actual one.

"We're headlining this one for once," They say, "Big achievement for a small town band."

It was...

Normally, slightly bigger bands would ask you to be an opener for the opener that was touring with them. Your band didn't have the funds to travel. Yet. That was the end goal: To tour with a headlining band. Maybe even headline a tour...

"Y/n, you there?" F/n calls you out

"Hmm?" You look at them blankly

"You were imaging us headlining... Weren't you?" They ask

"No!" You lie

"Save that for when we tour with a headlining band," They say, "Come on, I'm tired, let's get out of this shit hole already..."

You follow them out to the parking lot and see a familiar face... Bridget: the School's Cheer Captain. The both of you are in the same grade. But, you never really noticed her until she joined the Cheer Team. Your friend elbows you.

As you watch the football game: Your team leading by a whole ton of points, you eyes drift down to the track, normally where the cheerleaders were attempting to hype the student section or the families who either watch their football team offspring or the band offspring.

Your eyes drift to the only girl with bright pink hair. By coincidence, she looks up at you too. You look down at your drum head, trying to not look flustered. However, when you look back at her, she's looking away too; a deep rose color upon her cheekbones.

"Let's go Dragons!!!" She, and her cheer girls scream

"Y/n!" Bridget runs up to you

"Oh! Hey, Bridge," You smile, trying to greet her casually

"I'm heading home, I'll see you tomorrow Y/n," Your friend walks ahead

You try to protest and try to keep your friend with you, however, was too far ahead.

"You waiting for a ride?" You ask

"No, you?" She asks

"I live close enough to not need to drive," You say, "Want some company to walk you home?"

"Sure, that'd be great," She smiles

You've met her a handful of times, but never really had any chances such as this one: the both of you have a one-on-one. She was also one of the popular girls. Not the traditional mean girl.

You lead your drumline mates onto the track. As you set up your drum onto its stand, the cheerleaders run over to you guys. You look up and see Bridget smiling ear to ear right in front of you.

"Captain," You tilt your shako, smiling

She runs over to her friends and squeals as they fawn over your other upper classmen drumline mates.

As you check to make sure your drum mates had their drums securely on their stands; you drum a rhythm and the others follow along. The cheerleaders gawking.

"I'm surprised that you girls gawk over the drumline over the football players," You joke

"Please, drumline has more dignity," She rolls her eyes playfully

"Pfft, wouldn't be sure about that," You chuckle under your breath

+*+

You follow Bridget as she walks to your neighborhood; unsure how to make conversation...

"What's going on tomorrow?" She asks

"Oh... Just stuff for band," You say

"What kind of 'stuff'?" She asks

"just band stuff," You say, "No one here really enjoys the band... I can always hear them talk over our halftime shows..."

"I try to be invested," She confesses, "But all of my friends drag me into their conversations. The drum stuff you do with your drumline sounds really cool..."

"Yeah?" You ask, your eyes nearly lighting up, "Well... That drum break was arranged by yours truly."

"Really?!" She asks, her eyes lighting up, "I didn't know you arranged music too!"

"It isn't that hard when you understand the basics of music," You say

"Wish I continued with music," She says, "But, it was too difficult for me..."

"Maybe one day," You say, "I like it when you guys do some stuff with us."

"My favorite is when you bring the drumline down to us and we just hype y'all up as you play. Seeing all the cool tricks is absolutely mind-blowing!"

"Oh.. That," You chuckle, "Yeah, I enjoy those too."

You follow her up a sidewalk, leading to her front door. You remain at the bottom as she ascends the two steps.

"Thanks for walking me home," She slightly smiles

"You're welcome," You reply

"You get home safe too, alright?" She asks

"Yeah, I will," You say

You wait until she closes the door behind her. You plug music into your ears as you walk the way you came.

I didn't know she lived down the street from me....

+*+

You and your guitarist haul in your personal drum set as your friend: the bassist and lead singer set up their own thing.

"Nice of you to help me, f/n," You sigh, setting down the kick drum

"Hey, do you want to tune these babies?" They ask

"As if I'll touch a stringed instrument," You scoff

"Come on, you play basically everything!" They whine

"Drums is more my territory," You say, taking the high-hat from your guitarist

+*+

You sit at the merch table as the openers go on. Your band couldn't afford to hire someone as your merch runner, so there would be two of you working the merch booth. At the end of the gigs, two of you would run to the merch table and the remaining lot would load instruments outside.

You rotated with two of your other friends once the next band began playing. You warm up your hands with some rhythms as you listen to some songs, trying to sound out the opener's rhythms.

You only stop when you feel a tap on your shoulder.

"They're on the last song, let's get ready," F/n says

+*+

Two of you rush out to the merch table as soon as the gig ended: in case any patron would want to buy merch.

"You guys were really good!"

"You guys are underrated!"

"How are you guys not famous yet?!"

Many new fans would ask you that question. You only reply with: "Thank you!", or, "We've been working towards being a big band.". Along those lines.

Once the patrons had gone, you begin breaking down your merch table after a successful show.

"Y/n?!" A familiar voice calls your name

Your head shoots up, "Bridget?!"

"I knew you looked familiar!" She says, "I didn't know you were in a band!"

"I..." You try to find some kind of excuse

"Go on, I'll take over," F/n says

You get up and stand in front of her...

"Uhm.... You want to step outside?" You ask

She nods, she gently takes your hand and begins to lead you out of the venue.

"Where's your friends?" You ask

"They headed home right at the end of your set," She says

"And... You didn't go with them?" You ask

"I had to be sure the drummer was you," She says, "Let alone we have two of our school's band members in an actual band."

"Well, I like to keep that on the down low," You say

"What? And not be popular at school?" She asks

"Popular isn't our thing," You say, "Besides, we prefer to get famous from the outside."

"Oh..." She says

"So," you clear your throat, changing the subject, "What brought you here?"

"My friends and I were here for one of the openers," She explains, "It only took us a few

"Guess I gotta drive you home now," You joke

You weren't really joking...

"Would you have room?" She asks

"For you? Always," You half smile

She smiles as she looks down, blushing.

You help your friends load the merch into your friend's SUV and bid each other goodnight.

"I try to keep my front seat clear," You say

"In case you bring girls home?" She jokes

"No," You say, bluntly, "For my food run."

She tosses her hair ver her shoulder, huffing. You could see the joke in her gesture...

"It's my own kind of tradition that I get food after a gig," You say, "Drumming makes me hungry. You saw how I was whamming on my drums."

You pull out from the venue and make your way to the nearest late night fast food place.

"Want anything?" You ask

"Just... A water," She says

"Just a water?" You ask, "Please don't tell me you cheerleaders have a strict diet..."

She's silent...

"Come on, one junky meal won't kill you," You say, "Besides..."

You tuck hair behind her ear to look at her in the eyes...

"I don't like it when people in my car starve themselves," You say, "So, please.. Eat something... The venue only had snack items... Which is why I made this post-gig food a tradition. Never really had a passenger join me on the adventure.. So that makes you a first."

You order yourself and Bridget food. You drive to a secluded spot and begin indulging in your food.

"Don't you cheerleaders have your own tailgates at the football games?" You ask

"We do, but I barely eat," She explains, "I get really anxious and when I get anxious, food doesn't settle well."

"I understand that," You say

"You do?" She asks

"Yeah," You say, "I also get nervous before every performance I have. I try to not eat too much so that when I do feel nervous, I don't get nauseous."

"Guess we're more alike than we think," She sighs

You slowly make your way back to your neighborhood; praying the night won't end... However, her tapping your arm resting on the gear shift takes you out of your thoughts.

"Thanks for taking me home," Bridget says

"Anytime," You say

"I know this'll sound stupid but ummm... Could I get a picture with you?" She asks

"Sure," You chuckle

She squeals as she situates herself to face her phone camera properly. You lean over the center console and nearly stiffen as she puts her hand on your cheek. As soon as she snaps the photo the both of you look back at the photo: your head lingering on her shoulder.

"You want a setlist too?" You ask

"Yes!" She squeals

You reach into your pocket and hand her a folded piece of paper. She immediately unravels it and she squeals again. She Nearly leaps over the center console and wraps her arms around your neck.

"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" She smiles

"Always," You chuckle

She steps out of your car, and leans down to meet your eyes.

"See you Monday," She waves you off

Again, you wait for her to enter her house, and fully close the door before you drive down the street to your house.

Chapter 2

[thebreakfastgenie]

It’s dangerous because you should be voting for people who have polices that you like. Under Biden this country has gone to shit. Kamala was in charge of the boarder and it was horrendously run. She is an ag who locked up the most black people for minor offenses in ca history. you supported blm now you’re gonna vote for someone that locked up a ton of them for minor offenses. she’s not good at her job and if she wasn’t a democrat black women id guarantee you would not vote for her you’d trash her. Look up who you vote for on neutral websites before casting your vote. And most don’t like that they bypassed a primary and the rich and powerful got to hand pick your candidate for you. So much for defending democracy am I right?

I’m not happy about bypassing a primary either, but what’s done is done. There is no path forward now that gives the primary voters a say. I voted for Kamala Harris for Vice-President in 2020. I voted for President Biden in the 2024 primary and he endorsed Vice-President Harris. Democratic voters are rallying behind her by choice because we don’t want to waste time fighting each other or open ourselves up to Republican attack. We want to beat Trump. You're underestimating how callously partisan I am this year. I want to beat Trump. Everything else comes after.

But let's talk about you. This message isn't just badly type, it seems reads like a response to a post, but none of my popular political posts are that post. I haven't really talked about Kamala Harris being a Black woman, because although it is significant because the base of the Democratic Party is Black women they've already begun incredible organizing for Harris, the most relevant point to me and the point I have chosen to focus on is that Harris is the candidate endorsed by the president, with access to the president's campaign funds, and has quickly secured united support, averting chaos. I was against Biden leaving the reason because I was terrified of chaos. I do support BLM and I'm sure I reblogged posts about it at the peak of that movement's mainstream attention, but most of the content on my blog is not BLM posts. A lot of my posts about racism and antiracism take a more academic stance. This ask feels like a copypasta, something you just sent to any Democrats you saw supporting VP Harris. I wonder why you'd want to undermine support for VP Harris. Could it be that chaos I'm so afraid of? Could it be because you want Trump to win? I mean, you didn't say anything about Trump in this ask. Not even a cursory "of course Trump is bad but." You do go in on "defending democracy," which is a big priority for a lot of Democratic voters. It's almost like you're trying to dissuade people who care about that from supporting/voting for VP Harris. I wonder why?

But this is what really sticks out to me:

Look up who you vote for on neutral websites before you cast your vote.

"Neutral websites?" What exactly are these neutral websites, pray tell? You certainly didn't provide any examples. There's just something about this phrasing that's incredibly strange. This is not, in my experience, the way leftists with left criticisms of Democratic candidates approach this issue.

All this is giving me the gut feeling that this anon is a troll designed to suppress support for VP Harris and the Democratic Party. Maybe a human troll, maybe a bot, but the goal is the same. If I get more asks like this I might just delete them so as not to platform them, but I wanted to post this one so everyone could see what I'm talking about.

[icycoldninja]

Hello darling 🖤 I’d love a Vergil x Fem! Reader who deals with depression and anxiety, cause I do and in times I have an episode I would LOVE for some Vergil snuggles and sweet motivational words. 🥹

Aww I'm so sorry to hear that. Hopefully this makes you feel better. Enjoy. 💜

Sparda boys + V x Reader with depression and anxiety headcannnons

¤ Dante ¤

-Dante is experienced with depression, having had several episodes in the past.

-His go-to comfort is a big bottle of whiskey, pizza, and tons of strawberry ice cream, which is what he offers to you when you're feeling down.

-He'll offer assuring words and makes sure to tell you how much he loves you every time you feel sad, usually following up with a long cuddle session.

-Panic attacks are new to him so he's not entirely sure how to respond. However, Dante knows that in times of crisis, what everyone needs is a big, loving hug, which is what he gives you.

-He later does some research and after reading a few articles, decides their advice is shit because nowhere in the reading material is "smothering your loved one with hugs and kisses" present as advice, therefore he will ignore it and stick to his original methods.

■ Vergil ■

-Vergil has had his encounters with sadness many times before, but instead of wallowing in self pity like other mortals, he MOTIVATED himself to push through it.

-This is what he does for you, sitting you down on the couch when you're at your lowest and giving you the most stern, serious, yet uplifting lecture you've ever heard in your life.

Instead of encouraging you to feel better, he inspires you to face your fears, confront your sadness head on, and find a reason to be happy; a goal to strive for. If nothing comes to mind, then he will launch into a long list of things you could aim for, all of them pretty valid.

-Your anxiety is different, though, as no amount of confidence-building words will get you through a panic attack.

-Instead, he will awkwardly sit next to you as you shiver, shake and hyperventilate, his arm draped around you and rubbing your back comfortingly until your hysteria passes. He might not know what to say or do, but he's devoted, and he'll stay by your side no matter what.

□ Nero □

-Nero isn't good at comforting anyone for any reason. Not that he doesn't want to, it's just, he's awkward and unable to.

-Seeing you cry or generally being sad hurts his heart and drives (or should we say, MOTIVATES) him to figure out how to console you.

-He ends up just pulling you into his chest and running his hands through your hair, patting your shoulder and kissing your forehead until you calm down.

-When you have your panic attacks (which he tries very hard to keep to a minimum) Nero employs the same strategy. If it works for your sad spirals, then it should work for your panic spirals too.

-Regardless of what specifically is plaguing you, Nero will be at your side in an instant, arms out and ready to embrace you. He's your rock; your eternal shoulder to cry on.

● V ●

-When V sees you crying, he honestly feels like crying with you. This is not an exaggeration; seeing you depressed or distressed in any way makes him feel downcast too.

-He wants to know exactly what's troubling you and what he can do to help you. If you don't want to talk about it or are in no condition to, he won't pressure you, but will stay with you and snuggle you till you calm down.

-He likes to tug you into his lap and run his hands up and down your sides, muttering sweet nothings into your ear, assuring you of how much he loves you.

-Shadow helps too, by climbing into your lap and nuzzling your arms and legs, purring loud enough to produce vibrations.

-When it comes to panic attacks, V is the most prepared. He busts out the William Blake and reads to you, his voice doing wonders to soothe you.

[namedr]

What are your art inspirations?

Disclaimer: A LOT of RAMBLING

Honestly hard to answer, nowadays I don't really look at a lot of art anymore but mostly just movies.

Biggest inspiration over the years (from 2020 to 2022) would have to be Kan Liu. His painting style with mostly just the round brush and hard edges really spoke to me, especially when it came to lineart I was a massive fucking copycat lmao.

Around 2022 I also began falling in love with Sungmoo Heo. The perspectives and overall style just fucks so hard.

The most obvious inspo would have to be Seonhyeok Jeon though, who I still rip off blatantly.

In general I began taking art seriously around 2020, when I found Kan Liu, because I began training to compete in bodybuilding, which I did the next year. I began getting super interested in how the body and muscles work so I just drew those a fuck ton, and those anatomy studies ended up really helping my art skills in general.

Anyway! For animation... Hiroto Nagata and Q Kawa are big inspos.

This shit is so fucking RAW and HOLY SHIT when I look at how the perspective gets just in your face I always just think "what am I even doing man I have to PRACTICE". It's like watching a Zyzz or Ronny Coleman clip before doing a lift at the gym but for art, shit's motivational.

This cut in Ghost In the Shell as well is WOW, I think what speaks a lot to me is when an animation doesn't conform to what's standard in the medium and tries to push boundaries/be unique. Be it in this case through insane details, in the case of Mushoku Tensei through bg animation mixed with extreme foreshortening or just a crazy perspective and punchy movements in the Madoka clip.

Overall it's hard to say what else my inspirations are though. When it comes to manga and comics I can think of Batman Year One, The Climber by Shin-ichi Sakamoto, Ultra Heaven by Keichi Koike, Solo Leveling (big inspo in 2021) and Homunculus.

Also, even though everyone assumes it, I haven't played Cyberpunk 2077 or am that big a fan of the Blame! manga, I guess I just have a fairly similar artistic vision to both of those.

For animated fiction it'd be Spiderverse recently, Millennium Actress, Silent Voice and a million other anime I've forgotten the name of. Naoko Yamada's directing for Silent Voice or other anime like Hibike Euphonium and the Liz movie has always been amazing to me because she is able to express characters personalities through their body language, like they way they walk or stand, in a way I have never seen done before. Extremely recognizable and iconic style imo. A long time ago I used to be really into watching anime, but I don't care much for it anymore.

Other inspo would be this guy on twitter, his stuff is insanely cool https://twitter.com/be_myvu/status/1725069515107533178?s=46

It's like that Ralph Waldo Emerson quote - “I cannot remember the books I've read any more than the meals I have eaten; even so, they have made me.” I think throughout the years I've been so obsessed with all kinds of artists that I've taken in inspiration from everywhere. I cannot recall them all anymore, but they have made me the artist I am today.

Currently, like I said, I would consider movies to be my biggest inspiration because I find it interesting how cinematographers are able to stylize real life, which I'm trying to get closer to. If I could direct a movie, I would probably stop making art right then and there, but I'm not really working towards that goal anyway lmao. One day, being able to make a short film in animation would be something I would like to do though.

I'm not deep enough into the movie scene to get the street cred of being called an expert but I love them a lot. Fallen Angels made me fall in love with fisheye back then for example. Fight Club and The Batman have a grit to them visually that I find inspiring, and movies like Persona and Heat also come to mind when I think of movies I just love. I could look up my letterboxd for a more thorough answer but I feel I've already been writing way too long.

For video games, I guess you can imagine that I would say Signalis lmao. Besides that I can think of Subahibi (vn), Muramasa (vn), and Va-11 Hall-a for inspirations

Lastly, I guess huge inspirations are also a fuck ton of music. I mostly listen to either metal or hard techno, but I think I'll refrain from any more yapping.

I feel that this isn't really a great answer to the question, but it's the one I consider the most correct, because it's never as simple as just mentioning one artist. With a lot of these you wouldn't see a visual resemblence to my art, but in all of these I recognize a feeling that I also find in my own art.

Thank you for the question!

[the-conversation-pod]

Spring 2024 Teaser

And we're back!

This has probably been our longest recording season ever thanks to the scope of projects we wanted to feature here. Some of the projects started in 2023 while others only finished at the end of March.

This season is packed with guests! Beyond the usual appearances from @ginnymoonbeam and @lurkingshan, you'll get to hear from our friends @so-much-yet-to-learn, @wen-kexing-apologist, and @twig-tea as we talk about the continued presence of OffGun and TayNew, our first dedicated GL episode, a discussion of what may be the longest running BL project, a breakdown of shows that started strong but finished weak, and a massive two-part Grab Bag episode to cover a wide gamut of projects.

You're going to be with us for many weeks, so stay tuned for our releases.

Enjoy teaser for the season.

The Conversation Transcripts!

Thanks to the continued efforts of @ginnymoonbeam as transcriber, and @lurkingshan as an editor and proofreader, we are able to bring you transcripts of the episodes.

We will endeavor to make the transcripts available when the episodes launch, and it is our goal to make them available for past episodes (thanks to ongoing efforts from @wen-kexing-apologist). When transcripts are available, we will attach them to the episode post (like this one) and put the transcript behind a Read More cut to cut down on scrolling.

Please send our volunteers your thanks!

Ben

And we're back. We have missed you all. We are finally done with all the VIIB Awards. We're finally done with watching way too much shit this season. and we have so much to talk about. I'm very excited about this season because, finally, I won. We talked about way too much Japanese stuff this season.

NiNi

[laughs] Ben, at the end of last season in the year in review, he said definitely Japanese is where it's at going into this year. And so far looking back in the winter, some of the stuff that I have probably mostly enjoyed, to be fair, has been some of the Japanese work. So, I am on the ride, I'm on the train with you all. There will be a lot of JBL being talked about in here. A little bit of some other stuff, but yeah, a big chunk of it's going to be J-BL and J-BL-adjacent? So that's what you'll be looking forward to.

Ben

The season is one where we're talking about the history and evolution of the genre a lot. We're going to have an episode focusing on GMMTV continuing to work the OffGun and TayNew angle, and how we responded fairly positively to that. 

We're going to talk about the ongoing experience from Japan via Ossan’s Love. 

We're going to finally get to talk about GL in its own episode on the show, and it's not just going to be one project that we're losing our minds over here. 

We decided to properly reflect on some shows that were trying to do something and did not really deliver the way that we hoped, or maybe even the show hoped, they would. 

And then we're going to do two back-to-back grab bag episodes because, while there was a ton of stuff that happened in this season, we weren't able to organize them into a cute setting. So we're going to unpack some genre stuff in one episode and all of the extra Japanese stuff in its own episode because there is just that much of it. 

As always, some of you sent us some questions. Thank you. And we have a new segment with one of our friends that we're really excited for you to see in the back half of the season. 

I’m Ben.

NiNiI'm NiNii. Welcome to the Brown Liquor Podcast, AKA The Conversation about BL.

[gorogues]

andrewmoocow replied to your text post: I just want to give her a hug.

Same, TBH!

demonbirdsforever said: Thank you!

No problem :)

Spoilers for Wonder Woman #12 beyond this point!

timethehobo replied to your text post: I’m of the same mind as you on this issue. Thanks for reviewing it as well.

Glad to hear it, and no problem! People needed a heads up on this.

demonbirdsforever replied to your text post: I heard from Wes (Critical Thinking) that Wonder Woman was going to get the… “Batman Treatment”. I guess this is the start of that.🧐

I hadn't heard that, but it's not surprising given that Tom King wrote Batman for several years. It's clear that to some extent he's differentiating between Diana and Batman/Batfam, but here she's not as different from them as she'd probably like to believe. That could be interesting if she realizes it in an issue or two and it leads to some soul-searching, but I'm not feeling a ton of faith in that.

demonbirdsforever replied to your text post: Side thought. The Interrogation was poor. I’ve seen tv investigators do it better without laying a finger on the perp. How embarrassing.

It was. In fairness, Damian's a kid, but Diana really should have had better control of the situation and of herself.

orion-nottson replied to your text post: DC writers try not to write a frankly bizarre amount of unnecessary violence challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)

And it's in that weird awkward zone in which Digger gets the shit kicked out of him but is somehow not bloody and bruised. Not that I'm jonesing to see him hurt, but realistic consequences for the violence might better drive home how brutal this was.

lfthinker replied to your text post: What I don’t understand is why Digger’s so reluctant to betray Waller. I thought a big part of his character was that he wouldn’t think twice about selling out the Suicide Squad. Why wouldn’t he jump at the chance to screw over Waller if he knows he could get away with it?

It is weird, yeah. I guess it's possible he's allowed to be free in exchange for his silence (and maybe assistance), but I can't imagine that even Digger enjoys seeing his friends (or colleagues, if we're being pessimistic about his feelings for other people) depowered, imprisoned, and enslaved. I guess it's also possible he agrees with Waller's goals, but that seems less likely because she also wants to take down low-powered everyday villains like him.

eusouomar replied to your text post: Wow I really hate all of this. The issue, I mean, not your review. Your review is spot on.

Thank you, I'm glad :) But yeah, I feel the same about the issue.

longitudinalwaveme replied to your text post: Our heroes, whom we are presumably supposed to like and root for, engaging in acts of at least borderline torture for an entire issue: definitely not why I read comics. This is like when they had Zatanna and Barry be involved with brainwashing people in Identity Crisis and its aftermath. Or how they had Ray Palmer torturing Killer Moth in that terrible Justice League: Cry for Justice miniseries. Ugh. Who wants to read about superheroes behaving like supervillains?

Both Marvel and DC (but especially DC) go through their edgy phases, and it's honestly tiresome. But it's interesting, I did a quick google of some fan reviews of the issue at other sites and none of them expressed dismay over the torture or even had a problem with the way Digger was treated. It obviously wasn't an exhaustive search and maybe there are others who are upset, but maybe it's just us Digger/villain fans who are bothered :\

longitudinalwaveme replied to your text post: And while I'm glad DC hasn't totally forgotten about Owen, but I dislike the snobby jerk entrepreneur version so much that I almost wish they had.

It's honestly surprising that they didn't, as it was just one story more than five years ago. I would have figured that someone at DC would google Owen and get the more famous version.

ammomancer replied to your text post: wait wym douchey entrepreneur, i didnt realize owen had even showed up post new 52 before this

He appeared in one previous story, which you can see here. He was very different from his pre-Flashpoint self, basically a new character with the same name.

pixie-mask replied to your text post: Our…heroes? Not just as a Boomerang fan but this isn’t enjoyable to see. Last I remember they weren’t anti-heroes. But this is my opinion on a quick look. Will …enjoy reading later.

It's especially disappointing from Wonder Woman, and even a bit surprising that it's in her own book (and not, say, some event comic like a Crisis title).

[fereldanwench]

WIP Whenever (Actually on a Wednesday!)

@chevvy-yates had tagged me in a WIP Whenever thingy last week (I think? What is time) and @breezypunk sharing their WIPs reminded me I meant to do this. So, stuff I'm working on!

Over my Christmas break, I just started barely scratching the surface of working on my own custom poses. Because I'm me, I desperately need some battle couple poses--Fighting side-by-side, holding the other one while they're wounded, maybe fighting each other, etc. I compiled a Pinterest inspo board here to get an idea of what I'm going for.

This pose isn't anywhere close to being finished, but it's a start:

A small confession: while I actually like working in Blender quite a bit, I kind of hate everything else about modding, lmao. I've probably said it before, but my day job requires me to use so many shitty apps and software that always require 37 workarounds just to perform normally--I really don't have a lot of patience for troubleshooting shit during my leisure hours. Hopefully, the project won't become too much of a headache when I get into importing and working with props. 🤞

Virtual photography is always a constant for me these days--I was actually thinking yesterday how it feels like the absolute perfect creative medium for me. I like drawing and writing and 'real' photography, and I very much need to make sure I have more analog and tactile creative projects to keep me sane, but VP just hits in a way nothing else really has.

I am still working on the photostory I shared last time, but I don't want to give away too much there. It's also on a bit of a pause while I figure out some tech issues (read: I regret updating my game, lmao). However, I already have a ton of shots/mini-stories I need to queue up:

Other than that, it's kind of personal reflection shit and contemplating goals/resolutions for 2024. Getting long-winded and a little blunt under the cut:

I've always really struggled with making goals--I don't think I've ever had a situation in which I explicitly stated "I have a goal of XYZ" and then I achieved XYZ. I've had plenty of nebulous "Hey, I think I'd like to do XYZ" thoughts and then lo and behold, I do actually make XYZ a reality, but as soon as the word "goal" is attached to something, I just check tf out.

It was actually something I was trying to talk to my therapist about last summer, and then we kind of hit a dead end on that specific topic and decided I had other problems that were more pressing to deal with, lmao. But all the best goal advice in the world--following the SMART method, sharing it with someone for extra accountability, etc.--Just does not work with my brain.

(The accountability thing in particular always hugely backfires for me because just telling someone I want to do a thing tricks my brain into thinking I did that thing and now I don't need to anymore. Also, I don't like people telling me what to do, so if someone was like "hey, shouldn't you do this thing so you can meet your goal" I will say no just on principle of being a brat, lmao. I really hate that piece of advice.)

I know some of it, probably a lot of it, is fear of failure if I don't meet the goal. I'm very hard on myself--That's a no-brainer.

But I also think some of it, maybe just as much, is fear of success. Which I used to think was the stupidest fucking thing anyone could say about this shit, but success can mean big change. Success can mean increased feelings of imposter syndrome. Success can mean attention and responsibility I don't want. Success can mean bigger consequences if I do fuck up later.

I've come to realize that success is honestly as equally scary to me as failing.

I think this is a big reason I've always been content (or convinced myself to be content) with being good and not great, even if that means I'm not reaching my ~*full potential*~. (There are other external/macro reasons for that too, like my loathing of people trying to push me to monetize my passions, but I don't feel like getting into systemic gripes, lmao.)

Goals that require me to step outside of my usual routine also give me a lot of anxiety, which is something I've working towards managing (you could say that it's a goal of mine to get that under control dfgjhfjgdf), but that's still a very real hurdle for me.

Like I've been trying to go back to a minimum of 20 minutes of dedicated exercise (versus just walking a lot) a 3 times a week, and I get stressed if I miss it, or even just feel like I'm going to miss it (like if 7 PM starts creeping up and I haven't started it yet), but I also get all bent out shape spending 20 minutes on exercising while I'm doing it as if there's a better use of that time and THERE'S NOT. Like, what am I really missing? 20 minutes of scrolling Tumblr? Shut the fuck up, lmao.

All this to say that I don't really feel like I'm ready to set goals in a traditional sense, and that might not be something that ever works for me, but there are things I think would just be... kinda nice for me to do for myself that I want to do this year:

I need to actually be nicer to myself. As a matter of fact, @ren3gade--I hope you don't mind the tag, but I've been meaning to thank you for the "forgive yourself" advice you shared a couple of months back. I started making it a point to use that in my self-talk when I start spiraling, and it has been one of the best means of mitigating certain aspects of my social anxiety. I felt goofy as hell when I first started doing it, but that shit works. Positive self-talk makes you feel better, wow, who knew certainly not me

In a similar spirit, I want to stop being so judgemental about my limitations, and I need to mitigate feelings of guilt when I set boundaries for my mental health and energy. This is something I want to achieve in all areas of my life, but I think the easiest place for me to start flexing these muscles is with fandom. Because, damn, I let myself get into some really bad habits with the CP77 fandom (and I forgive myself for that 🙌). One of the big ones has been putting pressure on myself to keep up with what all my CP77 mutuals are doing at all times, and I'm not doing that to myself anymore. I've spent so much time in the past two years methodically going through tags and blogs to catch up on stuff I missed, and I'm just... relieving myself of this obligation. I know a lot of folks have tried to mitigate that for themselves by encouraging everyone to use their username-tracked tag--I'm not doing that. I'm not giving y'all more tagging work, and I'm not going to give myself the same obligation just in a different way. If I miss a post, I miss a post. Of course y'all are always more than welcome to @ me or send me things you think I'd enjoy (I love that, actually!!), but I'm just one person--I'm incapable of being an omnipresent fandom cheerleader and I don't know why I was pushing myself to be that. Well, that's not entirely true--I have some idea of why, but that's also a mentality I'm leaving in the dust. 😘 Also, for a long time, I did not use the like button for anything other than personal posts purely out of spite because I got tired of people complaining when they'd get likes but not reblogs--My asshole mentality was "Fine, now you get nothing." And that worked for me for several years and several fandoms, but I'm frankly tired of the "like" slander on Tumblr. It's a valid form of interaction and letting someone know you liked their stuff. I don't say this with malice, but other people's mentality of being unhappy with likes instead of reblogs is not my burden to bear. Anyway, I don't want to turn this into a rant about fandom stuff, lmao, but the point is I need more boundaries in my life, and I'm starting here.

I'm happier when I spend more time than I have been on traditional art and creative things that get me off my PC. Like I said above, I love VP so much, but it does unfortunately tether me to my computer desk longer than is probably good for me in the long run, mentally and physically. I stocked up on some new traditional art supplies, and I need to put those to use now that I'm settled into my new place. (And I've been itching to do a charcoal portrait of my bb girl.)

Reading books (gotta be physical, no screens) also makes me feel better. I've got about 7 books on my nightstand that I could totally finish this year--Doing that might be the one stereotypical goal I make for myself.

I want to reevaluate how I "multitask;" in particular, I want to break the habit of always having to have a background show/movie on OR always feeling the need to do something on my computer/phone while I watch a show/movie. Even as a kid (way before I lost my attention span to my smartphone lmao), I've always been inclined to doing something else while I watch shows and movies, but that used to be limited to drawing or painting my nails, which I think is fine. Now I just always feel like I need a screen nearby to do something else, even if there's really not something else worth doing. And listening to music or podcasts while I work on a thing is also fine, but it's gotten to the point where I almost can't have complete silence, and I don't like that. I miss being comfortable with silence while I pour all of my focus into a project. I just need to find some equilibrium here.

I know this isn't exactly a standard WIP Whenever, but me is what I'm working on, and I think it's all essential stuff to nurturing my creativity. 😊

[toujokaname]

Mischief / Episode 2

Characters: Rinne, Niki, Kohaku, HiMERU 

"—There's something HiMERU would very much like to try ♪"

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[ Read on my site for a better viewing experience using Ois~su ♪ ]

Season: Spring

Location: Café Cinnamon

Rinne: Anyway, enough of that.

The reason we dragged our sorry selves here today wasn't just to mooch a meal off Niki.

Niki: I really wish you'd stop using my workplace as a hangout spot, it's super annoying.

But well, if people are hungry, I’ll feed 'em. 'Cause I'll always be an ally of those with empty bellies.

Kohaku: Now that's what I call an ideal chef.

Rinne: Welp, let's just eat like usual and shoot the shit!

We can talk about this PBB thing too—it's pretty juicy, right?

Check it out, I got so hooked that I ended up splurging on a ton of doujinshi about it.

This one's a masterpiece! I skimmed it, and in this story, Merumeru splits into different personalities, and Kohaku-chan gets toyed with by each one ♪

HiMERU: —If all this leads to is ceaseless mockery, HiMERU will take his leave.

Rinne: C'mon, I already said I'm praising you. And also, we do need to discuss practical matters too.

Honestly, this is unprecedented for Crazy:B. We're getting so many job offers that we need to start picking and choosing.

In other words, we've gotta decide which gigs to take and which ones to turn down.

Up till now, we've been so sidelined at work that we'd pretty much take any job without thinking twice.

Kohaku: That really so bad? Far as I'm concerned, every job's a chance to gain experience, so I'd wanna take any job that comes our way...?

Rinne: It's physically impossible to take on every job.

There's no way we could handle it, even if we bust our asses. We'd need ten or twenty more Crazy:Bs just to get through all the requests properly.

Kohaku: We're really that in demand, huh...? So I guess we actually do got the luxury of bein' picky for once...

Rinne: We could always just refuse all the requests and jack up our prices, but that's just one way to play it.

Like saying Crazy:B's not gonna keep working for chump change forever.

HiMERU: We have been undervalued for quite some time. It's likely they took advantage of the instability of our situation, during those uncertain times in which we didn't know when we might be fired.

Rinne: But tossing away this all-you-can-eat buffet we've been handed would be a total waste.

It doesn't matter how many times you hit the jackpot or trigger a special bonus mode—nothing's gonna happen if you don't throw the damn balls in.

Niki: Ugh, again with the pachinko metaphors! Explain it with cooking instead!

Rinne: Say you put in the effort to plow a field and plant seeds but just leave it there without harvesting, it's all for nothing, right?

Niki: Now that makes sense~♪

Kohaku: It's like lettin' the future play out on its own. But yeah, if you don't harvest what you plant, what was the point of sowin' the field at all?

Rinne: And now's exactly the time for harvesting.

Sooo, what's it gonna be? If you just pick jobs without thinking, it'll be all about taking the ones that make the most money with the least effort.

Kohaku: That's the normal way to choose work.

But work ain't just 'bout making money. For some folks, it's 'bout self-fulfillment, or tryin' to find some meanin' in life.

HiMERU: It's a matter of priorities. Whether to make a big profit now, choose the work we're fond of, or invest in future prospects—

In other words, should the goal be to use this opportunity to try various kinds of work and gain experience?

How we choose our jobs depends on what we want to achieve.

Rinne: Welp, think it over carefully.

This is outside of my calculations. It wasn't intentionally created to stir up controversy or set a trend, so I'm at a loss on how to handle it.

I'm gonna beat that metaphor to death, but really, this is just like hitting the lottery.

What you do with that 300 million yen—the luck of a lifetime—is all on you.

Rinne: The thrill in gambling's in aiming and hitting the target; when cash suddenly rains down from the sky, it ain't exciting at all.

So, honestly, I'm not all that interested in this situation.

HiMERU: You have such a troublesome personality.

Rinne: Yep. That's why I ain't touching this one.

You guys can't just keep chasing after my ass all the time. Try using your own brains now and then? Yeah?

HiMERU: Since you immediately sprint off in baffling directions, we're left with no choice but to pursue you desperately.

That said, it is true that Crazy:B's activities have been heavily driven by Amagi up until now.

However, while units like StarPro's Ryuseitai are undeniably conspicuous or even blatant, perhaps it wouldn't hurt if, on occasion, someone other than the leader took center stage?

Kohaku: This PBB thing's supposed to be 'bout me and HiMERU-han, after all.

This is luck that we attracted, so it only makes sense we get to decide how to spend what we made from it.

Niki: Do as you please~♪ I'll leave it to you guys!

Kohaku: Still as ridiculously laid-back as ever, Niki-han...

HiMERU: Even so, this could be a good opportunity...

Kohaku: Hm? What is it? I can't make out a word you're sayin' when you mumble like that.

HiMERU: Never mind that. —Everyone, how about you leave this matter entirely to HiMERU?

Kohaku: Huh? Well, I don't mind, but I don't really have anythin' I wanna do with this weird trend either.

Niki: Does that mean you actually wanna do something this time, HiMERU-kun?

That's rare~ You're usually as unmotivated as I am, just in a different vector than me.

HiMERU: It's unpleasant to be lumped in with Shiina's kind. But well, it is what it is.

—There's something HiMERU would very much like to try ♪

[ ☆ ]

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[aihoshiino]

thots on saito now he's back?

So Saitou has thots now...............

More seriously, I don't have a ton to say just yet since his reintegration into the cast is so fresh but I'm tentatively interested to see how things go. I really appreciate he wasn't just uncritically accepted back into the fold and that Miyako smashed his face in with a brick offscreen like she deserved so my bare minimum for vibing with this plot thread had been met and I'm excited to see where we go from here.

About Saitou as a character in general... I think I like him a lot more than I maybe should do? LOL

Not necessarily because he's an unpleasant or unlikable character (though I would totally get it if somebody was off on him) but because I think my fondness for him is pretty out of proportion to his actual role in the story. I've said this before but the Strawberry Pro family from volume one (Ai and the twins & Ichigo and Miyako) is my favourite dynamic in the manga so Saitou kind of inherits a lot of goodwill on the basis of being part of that group alone.

I am also, like any other gay person with taste, extremely weak to the trope of "guy accidentally becomes the dad of a troubled teen and doesn't even realise it" so Saitou and Ai's relationship was basically cooked up in a lab to make me so so so so so so so sad and soft. I also just think he and Ai have a really fun rapport when they're together and getting to revisit it is one of my favourite part of rereading or rewatching the prologue arc. Wanting to see more of that dynamic is one of the big reasons (apart from, you know, The Obvious) that I wish we'd get some kind of comfy happy end spinoff or an anthology or something.

I also really like what he does for the series commentary on the entertainment industry, however accidental or otherwise it was on Aka's part. I think when you're writing a story like OnK which is so strongly about commentary on abusive systems, it's very easy to make it onto a black and white issue where everyone involved is either an active perpetrator or a hapless victim - OnK is refreshing to me in that it's very honest about how many people there are in that fucked up system trying their best to just make good art and minimize any harm done in the process but end up perpetuating harm regardless.

Saitou is in this gray area for me where I think it's undeniable that he was complicit in exploiting and hurting Ai - at every step of the way, Ai was a Strawberry Productions commodity before she was his daughter and Saitou loved her even as he was feeding her to the idol industry meat grinder. But at the same time, B-Komachi gave Ai hope. It gave her opportunities and a goal to work towards and it got her out of a truly dogshit situation that she had no power to change without help, even before she was pregnant.

So it's like... yes, Saitou was complicit in Ai's suffering, but he was also one of the very few people in the industry who really, genuinely gave a shit about her. He's not blameless by any stretch, but it's hard for me to WANT to blame him especially since like... the dude lost his daughter!!! I think that's punishment enough, don't you?

Man, I had a lot more to say than expected lol. Thank u for the ask, anon, I hope this was interesting to read!

[ryuseibutgayer]

As I watch blue lock, I will update this with the names I knight each character with 🤺 If you're a triggerable fan, hush <3

Isagi: Isekai/ "NATIONALS NATIONALS NATIONALS" (wanna call him nationalist, but- yk-) / Never Noa / Noa stalker / Child Scarer

Bachira: (tokyo revengers) Ryusei Satou and Kazutora Hanemiya's love child,

AKA 2000s emo scene kid battling inner demons

Chigiri: Chigu/Strawberry man

Kira: #2 / Big goal save man / Dave bc my keyboard autocorrected to it and that's just who he is now, deal / mr celebrity / ISAGI'S YAOI BF CANDIDATE #1

Tada, #9: the man who sucks and ruined everything right from the start (LOOK I'M SORRY OK, I'M JUST USING WHAT HE SAID, AND I'M FUCKING AROUND) / one whose name cannot be spelled (none shall try)

Isagi's Original Coach: Mr.Snotway (oogway) (Yall saw that snot leak onto his teeth, right-)

Noal Noa: Bokuto from haikyuu, but make him football / Never Isagi

SIDE NOTE: who tf is the brat sucking his thumb while his hair looks like a pack of fucked up curly sticky notes - W H O A WHO THE ACTUAL FUCK GAVE MR SMILEY IN THE BACKGROUND HAPPY PILLS-?? AND WHO'S THE KOKICHI RIP-OFF, WHAT THE HELL-

Yokawa???: anyways, he's Nendou Riki from Saiki and Ryuji Suguro from Blue Exorcist's love child. I want his earring <3

Ishigari: An ape is the ape became the tree it climbs

Nishioka: Fucking Killua rip-off

SIDE NOTE: no. I'm going to quit r I g h t n o w if this bowl cut glasses baldi mixed with the short designer from incredibles on edibles looking mother fucker doesn't get off the fucking screen. Right now. Love the guy in the background opening his big mouth and "murmuring" :this guy can't be serious right now:

BRO DAMMMMNNNNUH, WHY IS THIS PSYCHO POTATO HEAD WITH A HEADSET LAYONG IT ONTO KIRA, F U C K MAN HE'S JUST AN AMBITIOUS KID- (lowkey his face reminds me of an attack on titan face, but sh)

BACHIRAS SLEEPY MOANS I CANT NDSIAIWEGDSMOQWOR OK I'M A SIMP-

Gurimu: gurimu is......oversharing because he's autistic. That's all I have to say tbh. / ankleless

SIDE NOTE: Why do none of them have socks or shoes in a concrete enprisonment block.

GOOD MORNING BACHIRA MY PRECIOUS LITTLE CARTWHEELING PSYCHO 💕💕💕

Kunigami: Captain Man (because why else tell him aye aye, bachira....?) / Bakudeku Love Child Abomination

SIDE NOTE: HOLY FUCK OK I UNDERESTIMATED ISEKAI THE CRACKHEAD, GODDAMNNNNNN POOR KIRA LMFAOOO tbh I wanted to see him get hit in the head with a soccer ball at the start of the episode anyways

DAY TWO MFS

Just saw the intro, who the hell is the emo with the hand and long hair over his face

Uhh isagi if you're excited in a concrete room with a shit ton of other guys in tight clothes sweating, ik it's pride but...keep it down here bud-

Who tf is the black and white haired guy, we've got Strawberry man and we've got penguin

DO THEIR PARENTS KNOW THEYRE LOCKED UP SWEATING WITH 300 OTHER MEN?

Dude what's with Mr penguin, he eats like a cricket ape

Bachira is my precious little schizophrenic baby

OH IS HIS NAME GAGAMARU? Bro I got so many jokes to pull hold up

Gagamaru: Penguin Face / Suicidal version of Shikamaru / Mr Penguin / Can't read my, can't read my, no he can't reada my foooootball faaace / gag on my kleats (or however the fuck you spell football shoes)

WHO TF IS MR JAPANESE DAVID BOWIE WITH THAT PLATINUM BLONDE HAIR AND EYELINER????

[moonshinedyke]

Pinned Post:

-Asteria/Eris (+)

-Mixed Black/Indigenous

-Intersex genderfluid multigender transmascfem

-Alloaro bisexual lilaen lesbian.

-Stud, butch, (bull)dyke, faggot, tranny, freak, bulldagger

This is my blog for venting and just talking about bigotry. I didn't want to clog my main too much with these types of posts since a lot of them involve discoursey topics. This is not a blog that I plan to use to argue with other people under most circumstances. I'm using this blog to vent about my experiences, no matter how big or small they are. Check below the cut for some of my beliefs.

Just because I reblog from someone doesn't mean that I agree with everything they say and do. What it DOES mean is that I think they made a good point in that specific post they made.

-Many white queers have a problem with using their queerness to try and avoid accountability for their white privilege and racism. There is a HUGE racism problem in both online and real life queer spaces.

-Gender criticals are enormous pieces of shit with a very flawed view of sex and gender.

-The hyperpolicing of lesbianism on here is super lesbophobic. Stop obsessing over lesbians not conforming to your neat little cis fem white woman centric boxes. Let lesbians have some gender fuckery without frothing at the mouth.

-Bi lesbians/gays do not hurt mono lesbians/gays by existing. We are not responsible for homophobic cishets harassing you guys and saying that we are is violently biphobic. Stop being a narrowminded cishet bootlicker, assholes.

-Straight passing privilege does not exist. Invisibility and erasure is not a privilege.

-Lesbian separatism as an ideology is transphobic, biphobic, lesbophobic, and racist. If you defend lesbian separatism or pretend that it was even remotely okay then you are a bad person, straight-up.

-Intersexism is rampant in trans spaces. We are not your transition goals, we are not your gotcha to use against TERFs, and we are not nonbinary icons by default. The diversity of the intersex experience is unfathomable because of how many intersex conditions there are and how intersex conditions are viewed across the globe.

-Slur discourse is pointless at best and a straight-up psyop at worst. Let a bisexual call themself a dyke, let a transmasc call themself a tranny, let a lesbian call themself a faggot. I promise that it's not hurting you when other queer people reclaim slurs. Quit your victim complex.

-Butch and femme have always belonged to the whole queer community and have NEVER been lesbian exclusive. Denying that is spitting on ballroom culture- in other words, you're racist and transphobic as hell. Furthermore, Black non-lesbians have more claim to butch and femme than ANY white lesbian does. Read more here. It's a Carrd, yes, but it's a Carrd with actual sources, which is more than you can say for literally every Carrd written by exclusionists that you all choose to use anyways.

-Queer is not a slur and it's up to you to avoid people who use the word if it makes you that uncomfortable.

-Flag discourse is ridiculous. If you hate a flag that badly, just don't use it.

-You don't owe anyone an explanation for why you blocked them.

-I'm very wary of anyone who is against non-traumagenic systems. I don't really understand endo systems or other non-traumagenic systems, but I've seen tons of fakeclaiming and racism coming from the anti-endo community, so I tend to avoid them. I'm not interested in getting into syscourse and I generally keep my system life private.

-Well-researched self diagnosis is good, especially if you can't afford to get a professional diagnosis. Ultimately, you are the one actually experiencing what's in your brain.

-Shipping discourse is ridiculous and literally all of you need to go outside.

-Anti-transmasculinity as a form of oppression exists and to say otherwise is antiblack and transmisogynistic, since it often goes in hand with transmisogynoir.

-Nonbinary people do not owe you androgyny, let alone any change in appearance once they come out as nonbinary.

-Nonmen and nonwoman are not just terms that are super hostile to multigender people, they're also racist due to their hostility towards Two-Spirit people as well as how they've been used to degender Black people.

[imjustabeanie]

Here’s the infir for our trade:

My style has a rockstar gf vibe. Sometimes softer colours too. I'm hourglass shaped and almost curvy, but I spend lots of time training (MMA) so instead im lowkey athletic with some muscle. I've got dark gray almond shaped eyes and medium lengst wavy blonde wolfcut with (renee rapp-style) bangs. Ironically (for Hazbin) I often hear that I look Angel-like? Like, even from strangers on the street?? That or that I’m intimidating. Ngl, that strokes my ego a bit (as all the other times I had strangers compliment me, tho I try to be neutral abt it bc ofc I’m pretty), but idk what really makes me come across that way. Got some casual makeup on usually. I’ve got some scars and bruises from training, don’t mind most, not too fond of my scar from a sword fight (long story), bc it’s big (and I hate that somebody might think that I lost it; my ego >>> my body - with injuries like that). Also, got a hidden tattoo. Yeah yeah, my youth group (idk how to actually say it in eng) doesn’t allow it, I’ve got my rep but give me some sweet hypocrisy as a treat (/hj), I think the tattoo looks awesome (yeah, it was diy). I’m social & extroverted. I write songs and am in a band. Other than that I like to tease ppl if given the opportunity; others say I’m flirty - bold with it at that. I’m ambitious too. I don't take shit from ppl, im far from meek. I have npd (if you want to look it up without reading scientific papers, go on tumblr, bc the rest of the internet is filled with ‘demonic narcissism’ bullshit) and it influences the way I am. I care lots about my image, don’t have a ton of empathy etc. I don’t kick puppies, but it‘s noticeable how I lack in this department. Sometimes people say I’m ’too nice to have it’ cause i do well with kids and do all the youth group volunteering. Kinda skeptical of serious romance cause I had lots of it & I don’t mix well with a lot of people. Maybe I could do something serious for once if I had the right person. I try to be responsible and respectful but I have no issue finding my place at a wild party or something. I can be soft-er if I want, like with children or ppl I’m close with (I've got many friend groups but struggle to make meaningful connections). Usually I just stay my analytical, laid-back self and say my silly little comments every once in a while. Heard I’m pretty funny if I want to be. My love language is acts of service. I like small things and I do them a lot. I can do praise too, but I don't care for it in return. Like, you can be an asshole (up to a limit, I know my worth) and it’s cool with me if I see you have your ways of caring like putting on a song I like in the car. Unrelated but some say I’m kinda closed off and ‘mysterious’ or wtv . Hate it when people push me to open up and be emotional; love music and I unironically had a few guys play songs AT me and I actually like that too, tho I get why ppl clown on it; despise the ‘I can fix them’ trope, it just feels wrong; obvi love my band, we are awesome; Deal breakers r: boring ppl, too romantic or sentimental, ppl who can't be casual with me, ppl who only approach me bc of my looks (yeah they are important, but my personality’s too good to ignore in the long run, come on), for Hazbin - no Val. I like ppl who are more negative than me and aren't afraid to shittalk everything. Just saying whatever, not caring if they offend ppl (up to a point, some issues aren’t debatable ik). I like to join in sometimes. They have to be at least a little funny. And determined abt their goals, like a lot, no matter what it is. Don't really care for morality (to a certain point, again) if you're charismatic and fun to be around, I’m along for the ride and happy to support whatever you get yourself into. Like, my perfect dynamic is usually when the other person says the wildest shit and I just go like ‘yeah, go baby’. Ppl try to argue? I pull out the ‘who?… who cares?’ card.

1/2, just a few sentences got cut

-★🎶

Hellooooo! Here's my part of the trade!

Your match for hazbin hotel is.....Velvette! With Adam as a close runner up lol

Okay so as I said in messages, Velvet would be a perfect match for you (with adam as your very close runner up). You said you don’t like sentimental or boring people but you like them ambitious and audacious. Tell me how it’s not our dear Velvette. Now okay, given her little screentime there’s a chance she approached you first for your looks but put her in her place and there you go. A nice enemies to lovers’ story. Who asked the other one first? Her. She was pushed to the edge by the other V’s teasing.

Something that fits you both in the relationship is that you don’t expect the lovey dovey atmosphere. It’s more like…that’s my demon, fuck off. She likes that you retaliate and doesn’t get hurt easily because she won’t have to watch her words. It’s not uncommon to find both of you bickering but if anyone dared to try and side with one of you they’d get hurt. Velvette love language is probably gifts and fancy dates. She likes it when you do small things for her and will show it off by saying find a better lover than mine or something similar. Your relationship will be public but the amount of photoshoots you two do together depends on you, she won’t force you into an influencer life.

Now Velvette likes your style and you two give me the same vibes. But you know what she likes more? Matching outfits with you. She will probably offer to do your make up for you if you let her. As for the tattoos, if the relationship gets serious then she will get one for you. In private, she does fuss over the bruises you get during training and even proposes to….take care of your opponents. If you do any matches she will clear her schedule and assist.

Besides her brutal honesty, Velvette is the best critique you could ask for. She will help out your band as much as she can. Leave the costumes and decorations to her lol. Now onto some personal headcanons, I think that Velvette would enjoy a lover that’s stronger than her (physically. In termof powers idk) but wouldn’t abuse it. Someone who’d pick her up and spin, her around or just someone with who she can get lost in their arms in private. A lover who won’t judge her and accept her with all her flaws. I also think she’s the type that enjoys late car rides with full on music to destress. But for all of this to happen and for her to let her real walls down the relationship would have to become serious. You’re both in it for fun and it’s easy to get backstabbed in hell after all.

Hope you like it. I tried to include everything

[dailycaligura]

Dailycaligura, I'm asking you this here instead of your main but which holiday do you think Caligura likes the most?

Ah damn, that’s pretty awkward ahah. Yeah I’m sometimes whining on main that I’m bored and asking for asks, well now that blog also will see it, why not. Btw let’s make that blog not just daily one, but like just a Caligura shrine, so you more than welcome to just ask me questions and read the best, not cringe or edgy, very canonical, etc etc, headcanons, which is mine ((((:

Ok sorry, but you got the point. Now to the question, I never actually thought of it! It’s pretty interesting topic, so I want it kind of to discuss. Cutting the post because there will be a lot of rambling yeah lol.

First of all, obvious thing but still needs to be mentioned, he’s a mafiosi and there’s a looot, if not everything, is tied to his connections with people, how they see him, what they think about him, his reputation in different layers of that hierarchy overall. So all these holidays he usually spends with company’s of other fat dudes in expensive suits, well and their wives and kids sometimes, need to make a certain impression on them too, duh. That way he’s not really have that much of a thoughts about the holiday itself, it’s just a day off where he can drink and eat for free, when events hosted by others of course, and be charismatic bastard and talk, talk and talk. The real holiday is when he finally coming home and being left alone lol!

Now let’s start with the most common one - religious holidays, like Christmas or Easter, whatever in F&H world they would be called like. That pretty much connects with his relationships with religion itself, I have a loot of headcanons about that, but in short it’s just really complicated. He don’t like the idea of living by some ancient rules, following strict discipline, being all that devoted without right to just reaching personal goals and all that shit, but ironically with religion and church he haves the best of memories. Usually with the priests actually, they know how to listen and that’s what he’s needs the most, but church and mafia is in business so boo hoo, all his secrets getting sold and now he have another shit ton of guys to torture and kill, and some poor bastard who he thought can became he’s friend finally. Ok whatever, he having just really mixed feelings about all of this, maybe drinking a little too much on these, to skip that all faster or try not to remember something’s.

The next one is New Year which is I don’t really know what is sort of holidays? Well, it’ll be just in its own section then. As much as I know in religious county’s it’s not that much of a deal than Christmas, but since all that holidays just fucking office party’s of mafia it’s pretty much just summary of year thing. He never felt anything about New Years, really, but older he gets, more melancholic that night gets. So I think he tends to celebrate it on his own in his later years, he’s a big shot in The Family already, skipping that one a year event is not that much of a problem for his reputation, I think. He’d just sit on the kitchen with some good champagne, with playing radio or tv on the background, and drinking it thoughtfully, also sighing a lot. Years went by and he’s not getting younger, what a sad thing to understand isn’t it?

If I started with sole holiday then let’s continue on that - his birthday. Pretty obviously he don’t like it, just like New Year’s more and more with each year passing by. He don’t want to remember how old he is, and that’s pretty personal holiday, and he don’t have a single living soul he saw as his loved or at least close ones, which is also pretty annoying reminder lol. There some people who knows when the date is, of course, even gifting him something, but just to buy his loyalty, and these guys is a newbies that don’t know yet that it only annoys him, and also the fuck worthy can you gift to someone who owns a shit ton of anything? So yeah, not celebrating, don’t like it, just maybe some another reason to drink more than usual.

Next - all that national holidays, I’m ashamed but I’m not really good at Italian culture, like at all actually, my passion is UK I’m sorry haha. But a read now about some and ok it just international, religious and important historical dates, but that also carnival thing and Halloween, so let’s think to these and alike. Those that being mentioned is about costumes and I think he’d like that one! If it’s not obvious already, I’m seeing him a fashion catastrophe, he loves it, making his own style and even doing makeup and painting nails himself, because if you wanna make it the best make it by yourself. Maybe he’d even waste some time for designing some clothes, not sewing himself of course, but going with it in the atelier and paying shit ton of money haha, good for him. Anyways yeah, I think he’d love to put on some expensive clothes of his own idea and whit his own style and showing it to the public. Pretty sure he’d do it only when he already establishes in The Family because let’s be real, some already weird in attitude dude with a fucking makeup and eccentric clothes wouldn’t make a best of the impression on a serious dirty business guys, fucking old mans mostly, so yeaaah, he needed to wait some time to show off all his artistic power lol.

Well, not sure if that that’s much of a holiday, but that’s pretty important to the mafia ya know - funerals. That’s actually another chance for him to show off his fashion style because it’s a big deal and at the same time it’s nothing, important fucker is already laying in the coffin, waiting to be put 6 ft down and became one with the ashes he came from, but still his power and connections is floating, intangibly, somewhere in the air, above and in the heads of all who attending. What a place of controversies huh? So of course he couldn’t not to make a deal of all of that, and also he needs to be in black because traditions, but his style is white! And by that change he speechlessly showing what he’s thinking of the dead one - if that someone who he didn’t like he’d come in usual white, if that some who he was loyal to he’d be, like needed, in black, but if that some ironic situation where he killed or somehow was connected to the death of the man of the day than he’d also come in black, but expressly theatrically. But he’s actually would be theatrical in all the cases, just not in the clothes matter, but in the attitude, he don’t give a shit about the fucker that passed away, so all his words would be also expressively sad, tragic even, that’s why he’s never giving speeches on funerals lolol. But in the case of being invited to the funeral of those who he killed in any way theatrical shit getting only worse. Those who know what is what would see that as pointlessly eccentric performance, those who don’t, usually family and close friends of the dead one, would see that as a cruel mockery, anyways Caligura is happy with that. All the world’s a stage and all the men and women merely players after all, and these hypocritical events is the best scenes with the best audience to perform. Well if summary that all then he’s like these events as much as hates, he need to say what he’s not actually thinks for too long, that’s annoying.

And continue with mafia important holidays - weddings. All I can think for that one is opening scene from the Godfather so oh yeah, Caligura likes that one. It’s full of fun things with a good chances to make some good acquaintances. And I’m gonna shamelessly dump another headcanon that is kind of tided to the theme. He’s usually playing the cool uncle role for other mafiosi’s kids, which is a good way to have more power on their parents and overall it’s just a good contribution for the future. But he’d never admit, even to himself, that he’s actually genuinely love that role, that fake feeling of a family, being liked by someone, being seen as someone who little one can always come for help, and the kids pays him back with usually thinking of him as the best of uncles. Sometimes even preferring to tell some personal problems to him than to parents, because he have much more chances to do something about it and to make some poor family of kid that wasn’t the nicest to the mafioso kid a funny, fucking, life. And also he’s goos with weapons and cooking, so he can both teach things to boys and girls. That way weddings becoming even personal, like he’s the dad of bride or groom haha. Sad and happy holiday at the same time, but mostly second one. I mean he have all the chances to be the one who’s gonna skin alive the partner if he or she commit some wrongdoing’s, so what’s there be sad about, really.

Hmm, what else, idk honestly, and I’m sleepy already so let’s call it a day. Maybe there worth mentioning some little things like others birthdays or whatever, but in these cases he thinks literally nothing because whatever, just drink there, talk some shit for the best, and go home or back to work, nothing interesting. In conclusion I can say that I thinks he’d like the most all these costume holidays and weddings, funerals on third place(or second because costume party’s and weddings both on first? Idk man), it’s annoying but funny sometimes haha. Thanks for the question it was interesting to think it out!! Byee, and I’m going to sleep now, on the 7 am, welp.

[glassedplanets]

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this year i read a ton of art books, so i'll drop a big list + reflections under the cut:

i'll split these up into art books and instructional books, though there are a few that did a bit of both.

art books:

the art of heikala

the art of loish

beautiful scenes from a fantasy world

mysterious scenes from a parallel world

a sky longing for memories: the art of makoto shinkai

expedition sketchbook

windows to worlds: the art of devin elle kurtz

reverie: the art of sybilline meynet

the man who leapt through film

instructional books:

framed perspective vol. 1 & 2 by marcos mateu-mestre

master the art of speed painting

sketching from the imagination

sketching from the imagination: characters

sketching from the imagination: storytelling

beyond art fundamentals

figure drawing for artists

that's actually more than i thought, lmao. standouts for me were a sky longing for memories, windows to worlds, master the art of speed painting, and figure drawing for artists -- each of these offered some really valuable insight for me and helped me think about something in a different way. i got all these via library and at this point i'm worried that i've exhausted the catalogs of every library i have access to :/

i've only ever taken one art class in my life and it wasn't a really great experience, plus i'm not great at teaching myself things, so finally reaching for instructional books about art this year felt like a big leap and i'm glad that i took it. i also watched some of the drawclass VODs that are up on youtube and started looking for resources like studies and sketches from artists i like. idk, i guess it's kind of been about demystifying the process for me. there's a lot of stuff i've been doing the long way round for years and years or not doing at all because i didn't know that you were "allowed" to take a shortcut, or that it was even possible (eg. foliage brushes).

this year was pretty wobbly in terms of how happy i was with the art i made and how much of it i made, particularly bc Life Happened in august and just has not stopped, and i know that i felt really bad and unhappy with art for a big chunk of the year -- but now that i'm past that, i can see that i've improved a lot in a lot of the ways in which i've been wanting to improve. you know what's nuts? i only started actively drawing backgrounds for every piece last year. now i can't imagine not doing something for a background.

i think i also gnawed through a lot of... idk, shame? inadequacy? some yucky feeling i had about tagging my art for tumblr search. i think it's partially that we're all back on this hell site and i just don't care about showing my ass anymore. whatever. y'all either get to see my fucking anime Poasting or unfollow/mute/block/whatever, i don't really give a shit. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

the art goals i set for myself at the start of the year were to try making a short comic more than once, which i did! twice, actually, though i didn't post one of them. that's ok. i don't remember if this was a goal, but i submitted art to a digital zine this year too! i need to check if i can post it yet actually... lmao. and i joined a fandom event as an artist, which i'm really excited for. i haven't done a fandom event since 2013 and i've never done one as an artist.

my art goals for 2023 are to do thumbnails for most of the big pieces that i draw, and to draw people interacting physically with each other when i draw 2+ in one piece. that'll be tough since i honestly enjoy the subtlety of Two Guys Standing Next To Each Other but it's an area i want to improve in.

[fouralignments]

Ai is out of control. I was not prepared for that hair. And as a black person I...actually have a cousin who looks like this [minus the curls] and I don't know how to process that information.

AI has a bunch of problems, which is the understatement of the year. However, I would say that ChatGPT and AI art is just the latest iteration of Big Tech's Big Data and their algorithm and other issues like AI in the job process, police, political ads on Facebook, etc. Its been here awhile.

This is not ok.

I've read once in Weapons of Math Destruction by Cathy O'Neil that despite the appearances of naturality of a model and even their impartiality; but, they're not, models reflect the ideologies, goals, biases and blindspots. I think the same is true for 'AI.' It also picks up gender/sex/class/race/etc. in the big data that it gets fed. Scientists or techbros forget that things change and so does the model, however forget to feed it new data or expanding other variables all because profit is synonymous with the truth and winds up hurting the folks on the other side of the transaction.

However, do not despair, there's been actual good news on the front. I'm not an expert, but I'm someone likes reading a shit ton.