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jarofstyles · 11 days ago

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Teach Me?

Hello love bugs, we've got a huge one shot here. I see a lot of writing where the guy helps the girl out with inexperience, but I thought I'd like to write something where he's the one asking for help. I had a lot of fun putting this together so I hope you guys like it. I may do more but I have a lot of other stuffed planned but let me know your thoughts!

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WC- 12.3k

Warnings- mentions of insecurity, anxiety, oral, soft!Dom H, soft!Dom Y/N, switchy vibes but mostly Dom!H, Y/N pokes fun at him for being nerdy but she loves it,

"Hey..." Harry began casually, wiping his hands on a towel after washing. Her best friend had invited himself over for dinner, which meant he was going to do the dishes. It was an unspoken rule of their friendship. If you invite yourself, you clean up. But seeing as Y/N was the one who cooked nine out of ten times, it had become a normal to see him at her kitchen sink. Her eyes peeked up at him from her phone, giving him a look to continue. "Can I ask you something? It's a kinda...weird request." He scratched the back of his neck nervously, looking at her with an attempt at puppy dog eyes. He wanted something and it made her narrow her eyes.

“I’m not going to the convention with you again, Har. It’s not my scene, I told you. I’ll watch any series of movies until our brains leak out our ears but if I have to sit through panels and Q&As where they ask what the characters favorite food is again I may lose my mind.” She knew it was coming up… but apparently that wasn’t his point. Thank God.

"No! No. Adam is going with me this year. Rude. But besides that…” It made her a lot more curious as to what it could be because he did genuinely look nervous. “It's a weird question, actually." He sat down next to her on the couch, twisting his hands together. "And you can totally say no... but..." He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Would you... maybe..." The hesitance had her sitting up a little straighter, raising her brow higher to urge him forward. "God..." He muttered softly, trying to find the words. "You promise not to judge?" He saw her raise an eyebrow. "I mean it. No making fun of me." He watched as she slowly nodded, waiting.

“I make fun of you for a lot of things, but if you’re asking me not to, I won’t. Are you okay?” Y/N asked softly, unused to his behavior. He was usually playful and could take any joke, so it wasn’t exactly like him to ask her not to do it.

"I'm okay." He assured her, but still had the nervous look in his eyes. "It's just... I've recently realized... kinda an embarrassing thing about myself." He shifted uncomfortably, his fingers fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. "I don’t think… I don’t think I’m actually making girls finish properly when I hook up with them. At least not every time. And I feel like shit about it.”

That was a surprise to her. Harry had the whole hot and nerdy thing going on, and he pulled plenty. Not that he always attempted or took them up on the offers, but he’d had a few girls he had hooked up with that she knew of. Usually he kept pretty quiet about it, but that didn’t bother her. Y/N had assumed a lot about him because… He did have some big dick energy going on. He had really nice hands too. The idea of him being unskilled in bed didn’t feel like it was right, but she was hearing him out. “What’s making you think this?” She asked curiously. “Did someone say something?”

"No, no one's ever said anything. Not to my face." His face flushed slightly pink as he shifted again, trying to get comfortable. "I just... well. Sometimes I noticed they'd tense up or seem kinda disappointed later. Like they were expecting something else. More? I dunno. And they don’t usually text me again, which is fine and all but I hate thinking I let someone down. It’s embarrassing." He avoided looking at her while he talked, staring at his fidgeting fingers instead. "I don't want to be one of those guys who only thinks about themselves. That’s the last thing I want to do." He trailed off, clearly embarrassed. So unlike him that it made her heart hurt a little bit. Harry was a happy guy and seeing him not like that was like seeing a wet puppy in the street. She had to fix it.

“Well the fact that you even care at all is really good. I know, the bar is on the floor but, unfortunately a lot of men don’t give a shit if we finish or not.” Y/N knew plenty of men- had experienced them herself- that didn’t care if it felt good for her. They wanted a quick nut and go. Harry never seemed to be the type. Honestly, he was very thorough in most things and she’d assumed that would properly bleed over to sex.

“Wanting to be better is half the battle. You don’t have to be embarrassed about it. The first time I sucked someone off I gagged really awfully, the sound made him go soft.” She laughed at her own bad time. “We all start somewhere.”

He laughed softly at her story, feeling a little more at ease knowing he wasn’t the only one. Y/N was far more experienced and open about being a little freak, so it felt better to know even she had some weirder experiences. It wasn’t just him. "Yeah, I can imagine." He chuckled, shaking his head. "Gagging on dick is not the most pleasant experience, is it?" He turned to look at her, his eyes serious again. "But, um, thanks for listening and all that. I just... I want to be good at it. For them, and for myself." He looked down at his hands again, picking at his fingernails nervously. He needed to paint them again so he would stop doing it. His pink polish was chipped. "And that's why I was wondering…” He bit his lip, his heart racing as he tried to work up the nerve to ask his best friend a very personal favor. The most personal you could probably get.

"Would you... would you maybe let me practice on you?” The silence lingered for a moment longer than he was okay with, panicking slightly as he continue. “I promise I'll listen to everything you say, and we can stop anytime you want. We don’t even have to! You can say no, obviously.” The man was babbling as he tried to untwist his tongue. “But I really trust you and I think you'd give me good feedback. Honest feedback." He looked up at her with pleading eyes, his cheeks flushed a darker pink that she hadn’t seen before- all the way up to his ears.

“Me?” That… was not at all what she had expected. To be fair she hadn’t been sure what to expect but that would probably be lower on the list. “You want to… practice eating pussy or something, on me? I just want to make sure I heard you correctly.” Because she sure as hell didn’t know if this was some sort of dream or delusion.

Harry nodded quickly, his ears turning an even deeper shade of red. "Yeah, you. I mean, if you're comfortable with it. I know it's a really fucking weird request and all, I swear I’m not trying to make anything weird with us but... you're my best friend, and I trust you. And I know you'd be honest with me." Y/N was known for being honest even if it wasn’t the most appropriate time to be. He looked at her with those big, hopeful eyes, his bottom lip worried between his teeth. "Please? I promise I'll do everything I can to make it good for you, if you let me. I just really want to get better at this."

It could fuck up the friendship. Y/N knew that, because it was every sort of cliche thing that tells you do not, under any circumstances, hook up with your best friend. But… it had been a while. Harry didn’t ask much of her besides her dinners and to go to some events with him so he wasn’t alone. He listened to her rants and brought her food when she was hungry and didn’t want to go out. He made her bed for her sometimes just because he was near and tidy like that. He swept the kitchen after dinner. He bought tickets to movies and concerts on his card and told her to pay him back whenever she could. He protected her if people acted weird at the rare chance they went out to the bar. Harry was a really fucking good friend, the best she’d ever had.

She also couldn’t lie to herself and say she didn’t think he had a spectacularly pretty mouth and even better hands. They had always been really nice. Soft, long fingers, big palm. The tattoos that trickled down… Fuck. She was going to say yes. Fuck it. “Okay. I guess we can, but I’ve got some rules.”

He blinked, surprised but trying to hide it, his heart racing faster at her surprisingly quick answer. "Rules?" He nodded, leaning forward slightly, completely focused on her words. "Of course. I mean... I'll do anything you say." That came out a bit too smooth, and they both caught the double meaning. He cleared his throat, trying to appear casual and failing miserably. "What are they?" His eyes were fixed on her, his hands folded in his lap to stop them from shaking nervously.

“I mean, I’m being a little dramatic. It’s only a few.” She laughed, leaning back on the couch. “One being we don’t tell anyone. Our friends are already weird about how much time we spend together. Two, you don’t touch me and then another woman. If you find someone else that’s completely fine, but I don’t want her germs and shit on me.” That was not something she liked at all. “If you’re practicing on me, it’s me. I won’t fuck around with other people either, but I don’t fuck with STIs and all that.” It was doubtful he would need to be reminded of that.

“I’m assuming this is going to be a couple times because the way you get good at stuff is practicing. I won’t complain if I get a few orgasms out of this.” She shrugged as if this was a normal thing to be discussing. Best friends having sex. “But the last one is you don’t make things weird after you’re all good with your skills. Don’t make stuff weird.”

"Those are..." He cleared his throat, trying to process everything she had just said. "Those are actually very reasonable rules." He nodded, making sure to emphasize each point so she know he heard her loud and clear. "One: Not telling our friends is smart. Two: Of course, no cheating. We aren’t dating but I’m a one woman type of man. My mother raised me better than that. You know she would kill me." He managed a small smile. "Three: I, uh, plan on practicing. A lot, if you let me." His eyes lingered just a moment too long on her lips, then quickly flicked away.

“Good.” Harry was efficient in most things. It’s exactly why she understood how much it probably bothered the hell out of him to not really be able to get a woman off, or so he thinks. She was just being a good friend, right? helping him out. “So walk me through what you usually do when you bring someone home. We start there. I can tell you if something you’re doing is weird.”

He swallowed nervously, trying to collect his thoughts as he shifted uncomfortably on the couch. "Well, uh... usually I'd start by kissing them, ya know? Get them a little worked up before moving down." He gestured vaguely with his hands, as if physically trailing kisses down an imaginary body. "Then I'd kinda... kiss around the area, maybe use my fingers first to make sure they're wet and all..." He trailed off, wincing as he realized how clinical it sounded when he said it out loud.

“That sounds decent, but kind of like a routine.” Harry was like that, she knew, but sex wasn’t. “Not all women are the same, though. We’re all different. You don’t experiment at all to see where her sensitive spots are? Do you keep kissing to the lips and her cunt?” The question was blunt, but she usually was.

"Well... No, actually. I kinda just do the same thing every time." He ran a hand through his hair nervously, realizing how basic that sounded compared to how she spoke about sex. "And yeah, I guess I do stop kissing once I get down there. Why?" He was listening intently, genuinely curious about her approach. For all his perceived experience with women, he was suddenly feeling very inexperienced in this one area. Something about the way she talked about sex was... different. Confident, like it was no big deal.

“Because women are sensual creatures, Harry. Sure, we have similar biological things that happen but the way we get horny is with our minds. Teasing a little. Dirty talk, if you’re good at it, ease into it. Kissing places that aren’t just the obvious.” Shifting to face him, she grabbed one of his hands and put it on her shoulder. He was definitely nervous. It was a little cute. “I’ll give you a cheat sheet for me. I really like to be kissed under my ear, over my throat. Sometimes a lick or a suck. A bite, if I’m in the mood. I like to be kissed over my stomach, tops of my breasts, inner thighs, hips. They aren’t necessarily obvious, but the exploration is nice.”

Taking his hand, she moved it to her neck and then dragged it down past her tits, down her stomach to the waistband of her joggers. “You can have a general path, but you need to be comfortable deviating from it when that’s what she responds to.”

"Fuck..." The curse slipped out quietly as his breath caught, noticing how comfortable she was with his hand on her body. His fingers lingered at her waistband, acutely aware of the sensitive skin just inches beneath. "I never really thought about it like that. I always just went straight for the pussy." He cleared his throat, realizing how crude that sounded coming out loud. "I mean..." She chuckled at his flustered state, finding it endearing. "So you're saying I should take my time? Like, really tease her out?" He moved his hand slightly, fingertips brushing the bare skin of her lower abdomen just beneath her shirt hem. "Kiss other places, see what makes her squirm?"

His gaze flickered down to where his hand rested, then back up to meet her eyes. There was a new spark of understanding there, like pieces clicking into place. "And if I find somewhere she likes? I should... explore that?"

“Yeah.” Her stomach had jumped as he moved his hand but didn’t say anything about it. “Every person is different. I’m sure you have places you like to be touched that people haven’t tried yet either. Being in tune with your body and hers, being able to read the cues that’s what could be your strength.” It was something a lot of men didn’t bother to take into consideration.

"Like, if she makes a certain noise or tenses up?" He was genuinely intrigued now, his mind racing with possibilities. "What if she pulls my hair or digs her nails into my back?" He shifted his hand lower, fingers splaying out on her stomach curiously. "Does that mean she likes it?" He was so focused on the hypotheticals that he almost missed the way his hand resting on her stomach made her stomach muscles twitch slightly beneath his palm.

“Yes, exactly that. Sometimes you’ll be able to feel her pulse if you’re holding her wrist, or.. Well, if you’ve got your hand around her throat. We’ll talk about proper choking another day, but you can see if her pulse jumps from that.” His hands were perfect for that, honestly, and she shouldn’t let her mind wander. Nope. “The noises she makes, if she pulls you further in, bucks her hips, those are all good signs. Not everyone is extremely vocal, but checking in to make sure she likes it, if she wants you to give more, it can help.

"Checking in?" He repeated, his eyebrows furrowing slightly as he tried to wrap his head around the idea. "You mean like... asking her if she likes it?" He shifted his hand lower still, fingertips brushing the hem of her joggers. "Like, 'is this okay?' Or 'do you like this?'" He could see how that might be helpful, especially with quieter partners. "But wouldn't that ruin the moment?" He looked up at her, genuinely curious and seeking approval.

“You don’t have to ask in such a sterile way. You can just say something like ‘does that feel good?’ or ‘that’s nice, baby?’ and see her response. You’ve got a nice voice, Har. Use it.” She gave him the compliment easily. He did need a bit of confidence boosting, that much she could already tell. “Checking in shouldn’t ruin the moment. It’s safe, it’s a sign of a good partner. You’ll figure out how to check in in a less… abrupt way.”

"Right... fuck me." He muttered under his breath, actually feeling slightly embarrassed about how little thought he'd put into this before. "I've been a clueless fuck, haven't I?" He sighed, running his fingers along her waistband more deliberately now, testing how she responded. His heart stuttered slightly when she complimented his voice."So like..." He traced patterns on her lower stomach with his fingertips, almost unconsciously. “Feels good?” Testing out the way she had suggested.

Y/N swallowed, feeling a bit of a shift. He had seemed to be having a good time touching her stomach, the light tracing on her skin making her heat up a little bit. She wasn’t blind- Harry had most definitely gotten hotter over the years, and he was just attractive in general. Though she hadn’t allowed herself to look at him as anything but the quirky best friend he was, getting to see a different side of him was something she was intrigued by.

“Mhm.” She tilted her head slightly to the side. “See? It doesn’t have to be straight into it. Just touches like that can get a girl wet.” It was starting to get to her, weirdly enough. “Tell me about kissing. How do you usually start it?”

"Kissing..." He trailed off, his mind briefly distracted by the way her skin felt beneath his fingers. "Uh... well. I usually start with a simple peck, just to see if they're into it." His other hand came up to gently tilt her chin, exposing her neck to him. "If they seem like I have the go ahead, I'll press my lips to theirs more firmly- it’s kinda hard to explain with words." Being a little bold, he let his thumb brush over her bottom lip absently as he spoke, his gaze fixed on her mouth.

“Well if you’re going to eat me out, I don’t see why you can’t just show me.” Kissing Harry had not been something she had anticipated actually doing, really ever, but she can’t say she hadn’t thought about it. The man had an incredible mouth. Soft looking lips, deep pink, the cute little birthmark, all of it was appealing- it was just that it wasn't a possibility for her prior. “Show me how you do it with them.”

His thumb brushed her bottom lip again, his breath hitching slightly at the idea of kissing her. It was just an exercise, he reminded himself firmly. This was just a dry run, to help him figure out his technique. But as he slowly leaned in, his heart rate picked up, eyes flicking between her lips and onto her eyes. "Like... this." He whispered hoarsely, sliding his hand back into her hair to tilt her head further. His lips pressed to hers gently, just a soft brush at first to test the waters. His lips were soft and warm against hers, the kiss gentle at first. He waited for her to react, to see if she would pull away or lean into it. As she didn't, he took it as his sign to keep going, slowly increased the pressure, his lips molding to hers in a soft, sweet kiss.

Feeling emboldened when she began to press her lips back to his, Harry peppered her lips with a series of short, sweet kisses. His lips brushed against hers once, twice, three times in rapid succession, each kiss a little firmer than the last. He could feel her starting to relax into it, her lips softening beneath his own. Encouraged, he let his tongue flick out briefly, a teasing taste before pulling back slightly to gauge her reaction. She tasted like the lemon lime soda she’d had with dinner, a sweet surprise. All of this had been. He hadn’t been sure if she would say yes and if this would potentially make things weird, but thankfully Y/N seemed at least a little receptive to it. His hand remained in her hair, holding her gently as he studied her face for any signs of discomfort or approval. “Okay?”

Y/N knew he would be a good kisser, but he was playing it safe. However, even with the safety still on, she knew he had it in him. He wasn’t as shy as he had been before and that had surprised her a bit when he had gripped her to keep her in place. That had been exceptionally hot. At least to her. “Yeah. You did well.” She cleared her throat to rid herself of the rasp. “You’re playing it safe, though. Here.”

Swinging her knee over his lap, she pushed him back against the back of the couch so his posture was more relaxed. “You’re stiff. Pun not intended.” She snickered, tossing her hair over her shoulder. “You’ve got to relax a little bit. I don’t know if it’s just me or you get anxious when you kiss other girls too. The thing you did holding my face still? That was hot. It’s gonna depend on the girl but you seem to have an idea on what to do.” Placing her hands on his broad shoulders, she settled her weight on top of him. Hm.. he really had been doing well at the gym. “You okay with me on your lap?”

Harry blinked in surprise, trying to catch up to the fact that she was currently in his lap. Closer than she usually got to him, voluntarily hopping on up. “Y-yes! I mean, yes, please. Go on." His voice cracked slightly at the end, betraying his nerves. He wasn’t sure if it was from the unexpected closeness or just the sudden shift in dynamic between them. Her weight felt nice on his lap, but besides a cuddle or two this was definitely the closest they’d ever been. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be nervous.”

Y/N nearly cooed. His frown was precious, really. He was precious. Sliding a hand over his jaw, she tilted his head to meet her eyes. “It’s okay to be nervous, but it’s just me. I’m not going to judge you. You asked for my help, and I’m gonna give it to you.” Slipping her fingers in his hair, she made herself familiar with touching him. They hadn’t been super touchy to begin with but she knew Harry liked physical touch. He was clingy with their other friends physically, but he had always respected that Y/N typically wasn’t the type. Now though? It was free game. “You can touch me how you want. Get familiar with me.”

Y/N wasn’t the type to truly judge if you really needed her and he knew that. Hell, that was why he had come to her in the first place- but she was intimidatingly beautiful. It set him off to be even more nervous. His mind briefly wondered if this was how he was in bed- overthinking everything- maybe that was why he didn’t get calls back.

“Shit.” He muttered softly, then snapped back to attention as she told him to touch her. He wanted to do that, he had always wanted to but Y/N only really liked to be cuddled when drunk. When she was, she would be giggly and happy, hold on to his hand and swing them back and forth, especially when he helped her get into the car. It had always made him feel special, but this? It was a privilege to touch her. Hesitantly, he wrapped his arms loosely around her, testing the waters. “Like this?” He spread his fingers out slightly on her back, his thumbs nearly brushing the bottom of her bra strap under her top.

“Yeah, that’s nice.” Leaning into him, she let her fingers run over the rims of his glasses. “These are cute. I like them.” His new glasses suited him. They were a little bit thinner than his old ones and it was a tad bit more modern. She hadn’t been lying to him when she said he had the hot n’ nerdy advantage. “You’ve got really nice hands, Har. Use them.”

He blushed slightly at the compliment on his glasses, his fingers tightening slightly on her waist possessively. "You really think?" He asked softly, tilting his head to the side to give her better access to his face. He liked when she did little things like that, adjusting his glasses or messing with his hair. Maybe it was because he felt touch starved, particularly from her, but the simple brushes of her fingers made him feel that heat in his lower stomach. It was so simple but the air felt a lot thicker than it had before. He took a deep breath, steeling his nerves to be more bold as he slowly dragged his hands over her hips.

“Mhm.” She nodded, gently running her nails over his scalp. “See? I’m not too scary.” Though she had to admit that the feeling of his big hands pawing at her and running over her hips and waist made her feel a little bit giddy. Maybe she could attribute it to the fact it really had been a while since she had been touched in a way that wasn’t friendly, but her body liked the way it felt. “You’re being polite, which is nice. But as cute as your little gentleman thing is, I know you want to grab my ass, Harry. You can do it.”

Harry's breath caught as she said that, his eyes darkening slightly behind his glasses. He had definitely been thinking about it, doubted there was anyone who saw it and didn’t want to, but he hadn't wanted to overstep. Hearing her give him permission was like a green light and he couldn't help himself. His hands squeezed her hips before slowly sliding down to grip her ass, his fingers spreading out to knead the soft flesh. "Fuck..." He muttered under his breath, his voice hoarse. "You're so soft."

His grip on her ass tightened reflexively as he pulled her more firmly against him, a low groan escaping his lips. The heat of her pressed deliciously against his hardening cock, and he couldn't help but roll his hips slightly, seeking friction. "Shit, Y/N...Sorry. I don't want to get carried away." He breathed, his face flushing darker. Here he was, rock hard with his best friend in his lap, from a little ass grab. It was embarrassing how quickly he had gotten worked up- But God, it felt good.

There was a sigh out of her mouth as she felt him start to relax and do what he wanted to do. This was closer to where she wanted him to get, but she hadn’t expected it to feel as good just being rubbed over his lap. “There you go- it’s okay.” She whispered. “That’s hot. You want to show her that you’re eager for her.” With her grip in his hair, she tugged his head back slightly to look at his pink cheek. “You’re a faster learner, I know. But you remember what I told you? Try kissing my neck. I told you the spots I like.”

His eyes fluttered shut as she tugged on his hair, his throat exposed to her. "Yeah. I can do it. S’long as you feel good, m’happy..." He whispered, his voice rougher than she had ever heard it. Leaning into her touch, he let her guide his face into her neck and followed instructions quickly to press open mouth kisses to her skin. He started at the spot just below her ear, as she had told him about, sucking gently on the soft skin. His hands continued to grab at her ass, pulling her flush against him as he kissed and sucked his way down her neck.

The kisses trailed lower, his lips hot and damp against her neck. Each press of his mouth made chills rise on her skin, his stubble lightly scratching her sensitive skin in the most delicious way. As he sucked gently on a particularly sweet spot, she couldn't help but tip her head to give him better access, a soft gasp escaping her lips. None of this had been expected, but liking his mouth on her skin hadn’t been. Maybe it really was just the fact it had been a while but… it felt better than her last hookup.

Harry was her friend and she trusted him. She felt safe, and that probably made her feel a lot more comfortable, just as it probably did for him. But having his hands all over her was something her whole body was responding to. A quick learner, he had realized how much she liked feeling the friction and did something about it. His strong hands gripped her ass harder, pulling her over his lap and letting feel the throb of him through their clothes.

He could feel her getting heavier in his lap, her breath growing shallow as he continued his adoration of her neck. It felt amazing, yes, but he was in a bit of awe. Harry really should have known that Y/N didn’t half ass anything. She was thorough in everything she did- apparently it extended to teaching him how to please a woman. His hands roamed freely as he adjusted, taking a risk in spreading her legs wider over his lap to better fit her between his thighs.

"Am I doing okay?" He mumbled into her neck, his voice muffled. "Is this warming you up enough? Or should I be doing more?" His fingers flexed on her hips before sliding down, spreading out to rest on her thighs.

“You’re doing good.” The thickness in her throat made her voice a bit raspier, unsure how she had managed to let herself get to this point. It felt really fucking good. His hands strong and so fucking big, splaying over her thighs. The heat of them seeming to radiate through her skin and down to her bones, she wanted to lean into that touch.

God, she was touch deprived.

He had done a good job in making her panties damp and it felt almost embarrassing that a little bit of heavy petting and kissing on the neck had her pussy throbbing, but she couldn’t exactly deny it. Lightly rubbing herself against him again to get more of the friction her body was demanding, she closed her eyes and let her head lean back before she admitted it to him. “You’re making me wet.”

His whole body seemed to tense up at her whispered admission, his hands flexing on her as he took a breath. "You are?" He whispered back, his voice not able to contain his surprise. He had hoped he was doing something right- especially after all the apparent failures he’d had- but hearing that she was wet from just his touch and kisses was... something else. He wasn't used to being this effective. His ego swelled slightly, making him bolder. "Can I... touch more?" He asked hesitantly, his fingers inching higher up her thighs. "Can I feel what I’m doing to you?"

His words had her gritting his teeth. Where the fuck did that come from, and why did it made her throb? Letting out a breath through her nose, she opened her eyes to look at him. It shocked her a little, seeing his lips swollen and eyes a little hazy, glasses a tiny bit crooked. He looked disheveled in a way he usually didn’t. Of course he had always been hot but this look in particular, knowing it was caused by her specifically? It fueled her ego too.

“Y-Yeah.” She nodded, clearing her throat. “Yeah, you can. That’s what I’d tell you to do next. You have good instincts.” It was a mystery to her how Harry, who was good at almost everything, had struggled to make a girl cum- but she was the teacher now. “You can slip your hand into the waistband.”

"Fuck. Thank you." Harry muttered under his breath. He couldn't believe he was actually about to touch Y/N intimately, after all these years of being just friends… It was insane. He wasn’t unable to see how insanely fucking hot she was, that had never been an issue. He’d had a few questionable wet dreams about her- but the actual idea of ever touching her hadn’t come up until recently, and he was liking it a bit more than he probably should be for a lesson.

With trembling fingers, he slowly slipped one large hand down the front of her joggers, sliding it along her stomach until he reached the top of her panties. "Can... can I? Under them?" His breath was warm against her neck as he asked permission, albeit a bit jumbled, waiting for her nod before slowly slipping under the final piece of fabric that kept him from her most intimate place.

At her nod, he released a deep breath through his nose. His heart was racing as he slowly pushed his hand under her panties, the back of his fingers brushing against the soft, damp fabric. He could feel the heat emanating from between her legs, his own body responded accordingly. His cock was pulsing in his briefs, surely starting to make a bit of a mess. "Holy shit." Harry breathed, his voice shaking slightly as he explored her with his hand. His fingers dipped lower, feeling the slickness coating her folds. “You really are fucking soaked.” Tilting his head up with an awed smile, he met her eyes. “I did that t’you?”

“Mhm.” It felt slightly harder to breathe as she looked at his eyes, seeing the pride in his face, feeling his fingers cupping her wet pussy and giving a little squeeze. It had her inhaling sharply, fingers on his shoulder digging into his shirt. “You did. I- I want you to show me what you do when you get to this stage with the girls you hook up with.” It was taking everything in her not to rock against his hand, staying still as she tried to ground herself.

His fingers trembled slightly as he tried to mimic what he thought he had seen in porn or heard from his friends. He had forgotten what to do. Another symptom of his damn nerves taking over. He roughly spread her lips apart, his thumb pressing against her clit as his middle finger pushed inside her soaked pussy. "Shit... I'm... I'm not really sure what to do..." He admitted, his voice shaking as he started to rub her clit in slightly sporadic circles while thrusting his finger inside her. It was clumsy and a bit rough, but he was trying his best.

“Okay- alright. Stop.” Making sure to keep her voice soft and not like she was scolding him, she held his face in her hands. “You’re jumping right into it a bit too fast, Honey.” The nickname fell from her lips a bit too easily but she decided to ignore that. “You need to ease into it. Find a rhythm. Pull your fingers out.” She instructed, gently stroking over his cheekbone. It was obvious he was embarrassed from his flushed cheeks, and she didn’t want that. He wasn’t doing too badly, but he’d asked for a lesson. That’s what she was going to give him.

“Hey… Look at me.” Tilting his chin up, she gave him a soft smile. “S’okay, Har. You came to me for help. I’m gonna help you. You didn’t do anything inherently wrong.” Still, she could see he felt some type of way about it, and she knew he needed a bit more comforting. Leaning in, her lips pressed against his in a soft peck. It was more intimate than it should have been, but she was again, going to ignore that. “Hi.” Smoothing the skin under his eye, she gave him a giggle. “Okay, so… You’ve got incredible hands. They’re so nice… and I know you can be good with them. So let’s start slow, okay? Do slow circles over my clit with your thumb. Nice n’gentle.”

His shoulders had dropped slightly after her small kiss, ignoring the flutter he’d felt in his chest from it. He hadn't realized how tense he had gotten, like he had failed the test- but this was Y/N. Y/N was safe, she was kind despite how blunt she was, and she was helping him. There was no evidence of her making fun of him in her tone, simply sweet. Unusual, maybe, but it seemed like she knew what she needed.

"Okay." He mumbled softly, his cheeks slightly less red. Her compliments helped a bit- He had always had confidence issues when it came to this. "Like this?" He asked shyly, his large thumb slowly making small, loose circles over her clit. He was careful to keep his touch gentle like she asked, watching her face for any signs that he was doing it wrong again.

He felt her body tense pleasantly at his touch, a soft exhale escaping her lips. Encouraged by her response, he maintained the slow circles, his thumb brushing over her clit with deliberate gentleness. Her hips gave a tiny involuntary roll against his hand, seeking more of the pleasant friction. Harry's fingers twitched slightly, wanting to increase his pace but remembering her instruction. He resisted the urge, keeping the rhythm maddeningly slow.

“Yeah. That’s so nice.” She whispered. It was experimenting, letting him explore and get the hang of it. “Every woman is different. Some people will want it faster, some will want it rougher, but I like this to start.” She admitted, leaning into him. “Here.” Dragging the cropped top off of her body, she exposed the lacy bralette she had heard good reviews for to him. It was quite nice, holding her tits up in a way she hasn’t expected- but she’d chosen correctly today, unknowing that a man would be able to see it firsthand. “When you’re doing this, you keep kissing her. Licking. Sucking her nipples, if she’s into it.”

His eyes roamed over her bralette-clad breasts, the delicate lace contrasting with her soft, smooth skin. He felt his mouth watering, the urge to taste her growing stronger as he watched them move as she breathed- but thankfully, thank god, she had given the go ahead to touch. To taste. "Okay. I definitely can do that." He murmured, his thumb continuing its slow circles on her clit as he leaned in to press open-mouthed kisses to her collarbone.

His lips trailed lower, his kisses growing more intentional. The lace of her bralette tickled his lips as he worked his way down. He could see her nipples hardening beneath the fabric, making his mouth water. His thumb continued its steady, slow rhythm on her clit, causing her to shift slightly in his lap. It was surreal to feel her breathing, hear it so close up as he kissed over her pounding heart.

He was doing this to her. Harry was making her wet, making her squirm. The confidence the breathy moan she let out had him pushing for more. With one hand, he gently pushed the lace down to expose one breast fully, making her gasp softly. His lips immediately found her hard nipple, surrounding it completely and sucking gently.

“Oh, Jesus.” The words were pathetically, a mewl that came from the back of her throat as his hot tongue lapped over her swollen nipple. The suction was light, soft, just like his thumb on her clit- and it was enough to make her feel like she was going insane. “T-That’s really fucking nice.” She praised, raising her hand to card it through his fluffy curls. He must have just washed them, they always looked pretty when he did.

Hearing her moan like that, praising him so freely, sent a jolt straight to his cock. He hummed around her nipple, the vibrations deliberate this time. His tongue flicked over the hardened bud before he switched to sucking harder, desperate to elicit another gorgeous noise from her.

“Yeah- like that.” Rocking her hips slightly into his hand, she pulled his head closed onto her breast. It felt too good, too hot to stop. Yeah, this was a lesson, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t enjoy teaching him. “Some girls won’t get much enjoyment out of this. Their nipples aren’t sensitive to it as much. If they aren’t responsive, you can keep it moving- or a-ask them if they want you to keep going.” Her voice was higher in pitch than she had meant for it to be but it wasn’t possible for her to control that right now. “I really like it, though. So it’s doing the job. You can rub my clit a little harder- give it more pressure.”

Her words had him nearly purring around her nipple. The little thrill went up his spine as her hips rolled into his hand, knowing that now he had a decent idea of what he was doing and could feel less nervous about it. Listening to instructions like he had promised he would, Harry added more pressure to his thumb, rubbing it harder over her little bundle of nerves. It was impossible not to feel her getting slicker against his palm, her breast filled his mouth perfectly, his tongue swirling around the peak before sucking it back between his lips. Almost overstimulation for his mind, but he wanted to keep going. He was trying his best to be good with his hands- he really was- But damn. Her body was so responsive.

Y/N wanted to continue this as long as she could. She wanted to feel him get more and more confident with it, but he seemed to have a grasp on it. There would probably be… a few times where they’d get to do this, and if she was honest? If they kept this up, she was going to cum and be too sensitive for his mouth. And by the way he kissed? She wanted to feel his mouth.

“Mmmm.. Har, Honey.” She whispered, gently tugging his mouth off of her tits with a gentle tug of his hair. “Hi. Hello.” It was stupidly cute, the slightly lost look on his face. “S’okay. You were doing good. A bit too good actually. I just think that we should get to teaching you how to eat pussy. I’ll cum if you keep going.”

He blinked rapidly, a slightly dazed look on his face as he tried to process why he’d been pulled away when he’d obviously been making her feel good. It felt incredible to have her nipple in his mouth, hearing her soft noises of pleasure. The haze of lust in his mind slowly cleared at her words, realizing she was probably right, even if he selfishly wanted to keep going. "Oh..." He murmured softly, a slight blush spreading across his cheeks. "Right. Okay." He adjusted his glasses, trying to regain some semblance of focus.

“Good.” She stroked his hair back with a tender smile, pulling him to kiss her again before taking a look at his face. “I’m gonna lay back, like this.” Sliding off his lap, Y/N settled against the arm of the couch pulling a pillow to rest her head on. The position had her sitting up slightly, but gave a more relaxed vision. Hopefully that would have him feeling calmer. “And you’re gonna lay between my legs once I get these off.” Her bottoms needed to get off immediately.

When he sat back, she tugged on the waistband and squirmed to get them off, haphazardly kicking them to the floor- along with her panties. There wasn’t much hesitance in showing her body to him. Y/N liked her body, she felt proud of it, and she embraced it. There was always those nerves though, being intimate with someone new- even if it was for a lesson. Spreading her thighs, she placed a hand over her cunt and motioned for him to lay down. “Do you remember what I said, Honey? About teasing?”

He nodded slowly, trying to remember all the instructions she had given him. "Tease first..." He murmured softly, adjusting his glasses nervously as he positioned himself between her thighs. Using his elbows to keep him up a bit, he swallowed the lump in his throat as he watched her spread them wider for his body to fit between. "Kiss, lick, don't go straight for the... the main event?" He asked hesitantly, his hands resting on her inner thighs.

“Very good.” Her face lit up as he looked at her for reassurance. “It’s the little things that get me. You know? The soft brushing of fingers on the thighs, the stomach, right above my pussy…” She trailed off with a sigh. “Kiss my thighs, Har. Can you do that for me?” Taking her hand off her cunt, she properly revealed it for the first time for his eyes to see.

Harry felt the breath catch in his throat as the sight of her bare pussy caught him off guard. It wasn’t lost on him that he was very lucky to be able to experience this. Y/N was beautiful and he adored her, but there was a new appreciation in him for how kind she was being. This wasn’t something you could just ask anyone. "Fuck..." He whispered, his hands squeezing her inner thighs gently as he leaned down to press a soft kiss to the delicate skin. "Like this?" He murmured, pressing open-mouthed kisses along her sensitive skin, his lips brushing over the crease where her leg met her hip.

“Mhm.”

He could see her body relax into the touch, her thighs parting a bit more to give him better access. Her skin was so soft and warm under his lips, and he could smell her scent growing stronger the closer he got to her center. Harry took his time, pressing gentle kisses along her inner thighs, his hands brushing along the skin in a featherlight touch. He could hear her breathing growing a bit shallower, her chest rising and falling a bit faster. It emboldened him to continue, to keep teasing her like she had told him to.

"You're... you're doing so good." Y/N breathed out, one hand coming to rest in his hair as she spread her legs wider, hooking one over his shoulder. She could feel herself growing wetter with each kiss, more aroused knowing he was taking his time to learn her body. Such a good little student. "Lower. Just a bit..." she whispered, guiding his head with gentle fingers. Her other hand drifted down to her breast, plucking at her nipple as she watched him between her legs. "Kiss right above my cunt.”

Eagerly following her guidance, he moved up to press a soft kiss just above her pussy, his lips brushing against her soft curls. He could feel the heat radiating off of her, smell her arousal. It was intoxicating, and he found himself nuzzling into her a bit, his nose pressing against her. "Fuck, you smell so good..." he murmured, his voice muffled against her skin. He pressed another kiss right at the top of her slit.

“Oh fuck- that was good.” She gasped in surprise. “That’s filthy. Rubbing yourself against me but… it’s so hot. Showing how eager you are to make the person you’re gonna pleasure, it’s really sexy.” Brushing his hair out of his face, she felt the heat of his breath over her cunt. “Tell me you want to eat me out. Talk to me.”

"I do..." His voice came out huskier than he'd planned, his eyes flicking up to meet hers briefly before focusing back on her exposed pussy. "Fuck, Y/N... I really want t’taste you." Without waiting for further instruction, he used his fingers to spread her open for him and pressed a gentle kiss directly to her clit, making her gasp loudly. "You're so fucking wet… Can’t believe I did this." His finger traced down her slit slowly, as if showing instead of telling how aroused she was.

"Your cunt is fucking glistening. I can already tell your pussy is sweet..." He muttered against her skin, his tongue peeking out to give her one soft lick. Tasting her for the first time, savoring the flavor on his tongue, he was proving that fact. She was perfect to taste- a pussy like this deserved the best of the best, and he wanted her to show him exactly what she liked. Y/N moaned loudly, her hips rolling slightly, a clear indication that she liked what he was doing. "Yeah? You like that? S’good for you?" Harry asked, his voice encouraging as he licked her again, this time a bit slower, applying a bit more pressure.

“Uh-huh… Shit.” She cussed, feeling his tongue swipe up and over her clit. “D-Do what you want. Let me see where it’s going wrong because right now from my perspective, you’re doing perfectly.” Why would he even need help? Was it a ploy to fuck her? That was doubtful considering Harry really, really wasn’t like that. The worst part was that she was liking it a lot more than she was supposed to. If she was training him on how to pleasure how she liked it, it was going to be hard not to lose it.

Harry smiled slightly at her words, feeling a bit more confident in his actions. He started slowly, his tongue flicking out to lap at her gently, his fingers keeping her open for him to fully access her. He could feel her wetness spread onto his chin, and he couldn't help but push himself, wrapping his lips around her clit and sucking softly. He looked up at her, checking her face for any signs of discomfort or pleasure.

He was learning, trying to remember how she had said she liked it. His tongue swiped up again, swirling around her entrance slowly before pushing inside slightly. "Like this?" He mumbled softly, his chin wet with her juices. He kept his movements slow and unhurried, his touch soft. He was tentative, like he was scared of messing up. "Is this good?"

“I.. Normally would say that’s a bit fast to push your tongue in but fuck, that felt nice.” She giggled breathlessly. “Here…” Her fingers were careful as she took his glasses off and tossed them further down the couch so they wouldn’t get in the way- or worse, crushed. “Wanted to see those pretty eyes.” Her fingers kept the hair out of his eyes as she felt a few kisses over her mound, in the thatch of curls above her cunt. His face was slightly wet, but it was erotic. “That feels so nice. The kisses…” She hummed. “You have the instincts. Don’t think too much about it. Doing things like that- That’s good. Just make me feel good. See what I respond to.”

Harry blinked owlishly at her, surprised by the sudden loss of his glasses but pleased when he realized she liked his eyes. His face flushed slightly at the praise, his tongue darting out to lick over her clit hesitantly. "Okay. You’ll tell me if y’don’t like it, yeah?" He asked, his breath ghosting over her sensitive flesh. He leaned in, pressing open-mouthed kisses to her pussy, the sound drowning out the tv playing at a lowered volume.

She nodded slowly, watching him between her thighs. He was almost shy like this, his face buried in her pussy as he kissed around it sweetly. His lips were soft, his kisses unhurried. He spread her wider with his thumbs, his tongue poking out to give her one slow lick from bottom to top. Her hips shifted slightly, chasing the feeling. "You taste so good." He mumbled softly, his voice sending vibrations against her. “I didn’t expect you t’get so wet for me. Soaking my chin. I love it.”

His words seemed to have struck a chord in her, judging by how sharply her breath hitched and her legs involuntarily tried to press around his head. She visibly flustered, clearly flattered by his filthy compliments- and shocked. Had he always had that in him? "Harry..." She whimpered, the sound of his wet mouth against her flesh combined with his sweet, dirty words making her pulse against his tongue. "You... should be careful with that mouth." She whispered, her hand tangling in his hair again, guiding him slightly without putting any pressure.

He chuckled softly, the vibrations traveling pleasantly through her core. "Why's that?" He murmured teasingly against her skin, his tongue darting out for another long, slow lick. He could feel her practically melting under his mouth, her thighs quivering slightly. This was how it was supposed to be. Maybe it was because he didn’t feel as anxious with her, they had repor, he truly trusted her- but it felt like he had a better sense of her body and what she liked.

She’d given him clues and tips, but he was finding out on his own what she liked. It was something he was enjoying the longer he did it, feeling more eager to bury his face in her pretty pussy and never leave. Especially when he felt her hand tighten in his hair and her body shift to get more. "Worried I might make you cum too hard?" His tone was playful, a little more confident now, and that was dangerous for her. Feeling him nipp gently at her clit, soothing it with a flicker of his tongue immediately after was enough proof of that. Looking up at her he tried to see if that was okay, but the noise she let out had him feeling fairly sure it was.

"Fuck, Harry... You smartass.” The giggle turned into a pitched moan very quickly after though, her back arching as he sucked on her clit in retaliation, her hips rolling against his mouth. Harry could feel her getting closer, her pussy getting wetter. He knew the signs, she was teaching him. His hands gripped her hips tightly, holding her in place as he licked into her eagerly. She was so responsive, her body reacting to his every move. He felt powerful, in control- and it was a heady feeling.

"Jesus, your pussy is perfect." He mumbled between kisses, not caring if she could hear him. He could see her getting close- her thighs trembling, her breathing quickening, and the way her fingers were now tight in his hair. That was his goal. He wanted to make her cum so fucking bad it hurt. His cock was a mess in his trousers but he didn’t care. All he wanted was to make her cum, hard. He wanted to clean it up as he made himself messy. "Do you want my fingers inside you?" He whispered, not missing a beat with his mouth returning to his suckling. He kept the pace steady but increased the pressure just slightly, wanting to hear her response.

"Yes..." Y/N breathed out the single word, squirming helplessly against his face. His mouth felt incredible and he obviously felt better about what he was doing now, taking more risks that only worked out in her favor. "So good, honey. You’re doing so good, your mouth is perfect."

How had he been bad with these other women? All it took was a little bit of instruction with a soft voice and he was licking into her like she was his last fucking meal.

She gasped, her nails nearly digging into his scalp as he slipped one finger inside her easily. "Your fingers are so big. Holy shit..." She panted, grinding down on his hand. "More..." She begged, knowing damn well she hadn’t wanted to be this needy for it but god damn. He was a good student. A very fast learner. "Please." The woman’s voice cracked with need. "Harry, please..."

He curled his fingers slightly inside her, hitting that spot he’d read about but had never actually found on a woman before. He must be doing it right, because she was practically sobbing his name, her hips bucking against his hand. He added another finger, stretching her slowly but surely, his tongue never stopping its slow, deliberate lapping.

It was obvious what she liked, what made her feel good, and he wanted to keep doing it. Memorize it so he knew how to do it perfectly next time- or continue practicing until he had it down. His head felt fuzzy with the need to get her there, to make her feel hot under the skin like he had been clueless about before. "Look at me." he mumbled against her, his voice muffled but insistent. He wanted to see her face contort with pleasure, wanted to watch her get closer.

It felt like her entire world had narrowed down to his fingers inside her and his tongue on her clit. It really had been far too long since she’d been touched and even longer since she had been eaten out with this amount of vigor. Maybe it hadn’t ever happened prior to him, but her brain wasn’t fully working. She was so close, teetering on the edge and he just... he just kept pushing her. Adding more, curling just right, licking and sucking in a rhythm that seemed designed to drive her insane.

Y/‘ couldn’t see him fully, not with his face buried smugly between her thighs, but she managed to lift her head, her eyes finding his own as he had demanded. The intensity in his gaze, the desperate need, it was too much. “Just like that, you’re going t’make me cum. Just like that, keep it like that- fuck.” Her groan seemed angry but it was anything but. She was worked over and sulking at how good it felt. “Shit, you love eating pussy. Don’t you, Harry? Just needed s-someone to show you how they like it.”

"Fuck yeah." He breathed against her, his eyelids drooping with pleasure at her accusation. He loved this, every fucking second. The slick sounds of her arousal, the way her pussy clenched around his fingers, the taste, how she grabbed at his hair, the sounds she made, the changes in her breathing, her squirming, the way her words slurred a little bit, the pulsing against his tongue.

God. Harry fucking loved it- he just didn’t know it could be this good. Addicting.

The vibrations as he groaned happily between her lips had to be adding something extra. "Knew I'd love it. Jus’ want to be able to make you feel good."

"Cum on my face baby, okay? Just let go. I wanna taste you." He whispered hoarsely, pressing a sloppy kiss to her clit before sucking it back into his mouth. His fingers curled again and again inside her, hitting that elusive spot over and over as she dripped all over his fingers and down the back of his hand. He wanted to make her shatter, wanted to feel her cum all over his face and fingers like he had been working toward.

There was no way she could even respond properly. The constant stimulation to her g-spot, his repeated sucking on her clit, the way he sloppily ate her cunt with little regard of the mess she was making on his face- the only thing he seemed to give a fuck about was making her cum. Who was she to take that from him?

Her body tensed, her back arching as she let out a long, drawn-out moan. It was a sound of pure pleasure, her entire being focused on the overwhelming sensation of him working her over. She came hard, her pussy clamping down on his fingers as she gushed all over his face and hand. Her hand was tight in his locks, tugging as a garbled moan left her mouth and she attempted to writhe. He kept her held still as he moaned loudly against her.

In fact, Harry didn’t stop. Even as she came, he kept eating her, his fingers still curled inside her as he lapped up her cum, cleaning her up. He was fucking starving for it, for the taste and the sound and the feeling of her losing control. He sucked and licked her pussy, feeling it spasming occasionally, until he was certain he had cleaned up every last drop- And her weak push of her hand against his head. Only then did he slowly pull his fingers out, his face and hand coated in her.

She was a goddess, slumped back against the cushions with a flushed, dazed expression. Harry couldn't help but kiss her inner thigh as it twitched before wiping his mouth. "Fuck, you’re amazing." The man murmured. Crawling up her body, he claimed her lips in a messy kiss, letting her taste herself. “Thank you.” It was mumbled between lazy kisses. “Thank you, Thank you.”

His hands roamed over her as he continued to kiss her sloppily, his body heavy on top of hers. He was still fully dressed, his erection painfully trapped in his pants. "Y/N... I’m sorry, but can I?" He asked softly, his fingers already working at the button of his jeans, his intent clear. "I gotta cum. Can I cum on your cunt? Please?” If he wasn’t so horny he would be embarrassed for doing this, but he was losing it. When it died down, he would definitely be embarrassed for how insane he sounded, but he couldn’t help it. Maybe the lack of blood flow to the head, it was going directly to the other.

“Shit.” Y/N laughed weakly, her body feeling like pins and needles as it came down from the orgasm. The idea was one she had considered, especially with how good he had listened- a reward. “Yeah, Honey. As a reward.” She sighed, leaning her head up further. “I wanna watch.”

He almost whined at her words, practically tearing his jeans open wide enough to pull out his stiff cock. He pushed his pants down towards his calves, staying there between her spread legs. His hand gripped his dick tightly, squeezing as he looked up at her face from his spot between her legs. "Yeah- yeah, please watch. I love being watched.” His hips moved forward unconsciously as he ran his cock over her, the head of his dick smearing pre-cum all over her cunt.

“Cute little exhibitionist.” Y/N cooed, running her hand over her stomach. “Go ahead. You’ve got such a pretty cock, but it looks like it hurts.” Her lips formed a soft pout. “Stroke yourself and cum all over that pussy, Harry.”

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." He chanted under his breath, his hand moving faster over his shaft. With his tip pressing against her clit, he ran it up and down her slit. "You're so pretty. Your cunt is beautiful- all of you, so fucking gorgeous." He complimented her, his words coming out in short gasps. It was so hot, the way her lips spread around him, how she looked all fucked out and messy from his mouth. "I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum all over you, baby."

Y/N looked up at him with a soft, encouraging smile, her eyes staring into his with that tinge of desire. "Cum for me, Harry. Cum all over my pretty little pussy. I wanna see it, I wanna see you lose it." Her hand moved down to spread herself, holding herself open for him. "You've been so good, so obedient. You deserve it. Such a good student, a fast learner… You can have it. Cum on my cunt." Her voice was gentle but commanding, the perfect blend of sweet and dirty that had him right on the edge.

"Fuck, Y/N..." Harry whimpered, his eyes fluttering shut as her words pushed him over the edge. With a final thrust of his hips, he came undone. He felt the first spurt of his hot, sticky cum hit her pussy lips, coating them in his release. He groaned loudly, his body shuddering as he pumped out rope after rope of cum, covering her cunt completely. "Oh my god... Oh my god."

Even as he finished cumming, a few last spurts dribbling out to make a mess across her lower stomach, he couldn't look away from where his cum coated her pussy lips, right in her thatch curls and the surrounding skin. It was obscene, filthy, and he loved it. Y/N had made him lose his mind a bit, but he didn’t really want to find it.

Breathing heavily, he finally met her gaze with a slightly embarrassed but mostly pleased grin. "Holy fuck, that was hot." He murmured, swallowing hard. "Never done that before. Came so fucking hard..."

"Good, cause you made a mess." She giggled, watching him as his chest heaved. The sight of his stomach and abs glistened with a light sheen of sweat- his hair was ruffled and he looked like he’d had a workout instead of jerking off on her body. "You like that, I think. Making a mess." She asked softly, watching as he continued to stroke himself slowly, milking himself. Her eyes were drawn back to his dick. It really was beautiful- and really fucking big. “Where the hell were you hiding that? God damn.”

He couldn't help but chuckle at her comment, glancing down at his slowly softening dick with a smirk. "Guess I just needed the right inspiration, huh?" He teased lightly, finally releasing his grip on himself and leaning forward to rest his forearms on either side of her head, caging her in slightly. His face was mere inches from hers now, his glasses gone and his hair disheveled in the sexiest way possible. “Just need t’do this before we clean up and act normal again. Don’t yell at me.”

His mouth claimed hers slowly, lips moving softly against hers. He licked into her mouth slowly, like he was savoring her taste, his body half covering hers. His hand cupped her cheek as he deepened the kiss slowly, like he was trying to imprint himself onto her. Just as quick as it started though, it was over. She shouldn’t have been so sad about that. He pulled back slowly, his forehead resting against hers. His eyes opened slowly to find her watching him softly, their lips still wet and swollen from the kiss. He grinned slightly, licking his lips again. “See? Not so bad.”

“Yeah.” She laughed, feeling dazed. Who the fuck was this? And why did he kiss so good it made her toes curl? Who was this and what had they done to her best friend? “I think your problem isn’t that you don’t have skill. Naturally you seem to get it. I think you’ve just gotten into your own head and you think too much.” She had been a safe person and it was easier for him to lose that anxiety with her, knowing she had already agreed to teach him.

“It can be hard to perform if you’re not able to properly get into it. Your dick can be hard as nails, but your mind not being in it will be a mood killer and they’re gonna know.” The smile on her face was slightly sad but she knew it was what he had to hear. “Because honestly? I haven’t orgasmed like that in ages. All it took was a few tweaks and you had it down. Maybe you just aren’t a hookup guy. Did that feel a lot different than the other people?” Maybe he needed someone who could openly communicate. The expectation of someone just knowing wasn’t always fair.

"Yeah." He hesitated, shifting slightly to prop himself up on one elbow next to her. His other hand traced patterns on her stomach absentmindedly. "It was... different." He seemed to struggle with the words for a moment. "With those other girls, I was always nervous. Overthinking every single fucking thing. Like you said." He glanced at her face, a slight blush forming across his cheeks. "With you... it felt natural. Real. And fuck, listening to you moan like that… Where did those lungs come from?"

“You freak!” She laughed, pushing his shoulder to get him to sit up. Adjusting her bralette back over her breasts she didn’t bother with the bottoms yet, because she really needed to go clean up. Secretly she was pleased that she had been different. It was so cliche to say it, but she wanted to be different than them. She just… wasn’t quite sure why yet. Her brain hadn’t come back down to earth fully and she couldn’t be bothered to truly question it. “You won’t need many lessons on how to pleasure a woman with results like that, I’m telling you that. Good job.” Reaching out, she squished his cheeks with a soft coo before he shot her a look.

"Oi!" He laughed, swatting her hand away playfully but with a big smile on his face. "Don't treat me like a puppy. And..." He hesitated, reaching up to cup her face gently, his thumb brushing her lower lip. "Did it really feel that good? I mean." His voice dropped to a slightly embarrassed whisper. "Am I actually good at this stuff?" For someone who had just made her orgasm so hard, he suddenly seemed insecure again. Like he needed validation. "I know you don’t lie like that, but it just feels weird. Cause everyone else seemed disappointed… I thought I’d be completely awful.”

“Oh, H.” She frowned at his vulnerability. “It was really good for me. I think maybe you just need some lessons on how to let go and relax when you’re being intimate. And I’m happy to teach you that.” Brushing her hand over his stubble she gave his chin a pinch. “Trust me. I’d tell you if you needed a lot of work. It can be hard for women to cum from oral sometimes too. It’s hit or miss for me, and you had me cumming so easily so, I would say it was probably a mix of feeling safe and you having some good natural instincts you couldn’t tap into before because you were anxious and your brain was in overdrive.” Pulling him into a hug, she squeezed him lightly as she inhaled his scent. He smelled like mint and sex, with a tinge of laundry detergent. Appropriate.

“When I’m done with you, we’ll have it all squared away and figured out. Okay? Don’t think about those times. Think about the fact you’re gonna get to fuck your really hot best friend.” Standing up from the couch with a laugh and a pat to his head, she walked to the bathroom to get herself clean- and take a minute to breathe. Her chest was doing a weird thing it hadn’t before and she didn’t want to think about it. “Hey, can you order something from that cookie place to be delivered while I shower please? Use my phone, my card is already in the app. Thank youuuu.”

He watched her leave, a small smile on his face at her words. It was a relief to hear that he wasn't completely incompetent. Flopping back against the cushions, he stared at her ceiling fan as it whirred around with a content sigh.

As requested, he ordered a batch of her favorite cookies from the nearby bakery, adding a special request for extra chocolate chips with a small chuckle. She had ordered quite a few times recently, so he had tried to replicate it while adding white choc macadamia for himself. A classic, even if Y/N would wrinkle her nose for them sharing a box.

After submitting it for the delivery, he found himself humming softly, a warmth spreading through his chest at the thought of learning more from her. That had been so good, he felt so relieved that he wasn’t defective- but he did have to wonder how he was going to be this comfortable with anyone else. Y/N was easy to unwind around. It was hard to imagine him getting as comfortable with anyone else in the way he was with her.

Getting closer to her in a vulnerable and intimate way was sure to grow their friendship. He couldn’t really see it backfiring. Their friendship was too strong.

Right?

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threepandas · 7 months ago

Text

Bad End: Games Played

As children, we learn to play the Quite Game.

It's rather simple. You scrunch down real small, ball yourself real tight, and find the bestest most hard to reach hiding spot you can! Then? Oh THEN, children, we all get really, REALLY quite. Until mummy or daddy find you. And no matter what, no matter WHO, you Do Not Move, until THEY come and find you.

Not for treats. Not for hugs. Not for threats or scary noises.

No. Matter. What.

To the others, it was a game. But to me? Born just a bit... different? I looked my parents in the eyes, saw the fear that lived there. That hunted them and haunted their dreams. I watched the way they acted. Guarding me. Never letting me wander. Keeping me between them as they slept. Holding me, shielding me. Both whispering their lessons, their love, each moment they could.

And I knew it was no game.

I was an obedient child. Perhaps that is why I lived, where others did not.

Or perhaps? It was my vague, half remembered, knowledge of this world. To be more exact, the chronological series of Otome games, set in this world. Endless streams of political and social clusterfucks, that cast the map into conflict after conflict, all for the selfish romances of a few. Pseudo-historical straight to pseudo-modern magical realism.

Clans of mages. Elves, werewolves, the whole shebang. All trapped in an endless cycle of conflict. Sometimes silent, sometimes open. Always, soaked in blood.

But hey... at least the Protagonist is happy! Right?

We should be furious. We should HATE them.

Our Clan? Did shadow magic. Unfortunately. Because unsurprisingly, Otome troupes ran true, and we? Have a complete Edgy Little Fuckboi as our Clan Heir. Worse still, I RECOGNIZE that Edgy Little Fuckboi! The fucking chuunibyou is a romance target!

I'm sorry, I was under the impression the Clan Heir's job was to KEEP US ALL ALIVE! Not get your DICK WET! But, my bad! My fucking MISTAKE! How COULD I have BEEN so foolish! You go on, then! Just piss RIGHT off, and leave the rest of us to suffer, while you chase SOMEONE ELSE'S GIRLFRIEND!

Fuckwit!

Ha ha.... oh god. We're all gonna die. Aren't we?

We should trust Alphard. No one else understands us.

Everyone? Absolutely fucking EVERYONE? Waves it off. 'Just a phase' and 'he's young, he'll get it out of his system'. As though the problems doesn't run deeper. As though the Clan Head isn't an old man, barely holding us together. As though he isn't planning to hand it all over to a chuunibyou who refuses to sit still and LEARN ANYTHING. Who picks fights he expects US to win for him. Expects US to die for him.

So he can look 'cool'.

Alphard is basicly running this place. But does the Clan Head care? No. Because Alphard is a 'half-breed'. Because ALPHARD has the audacity to be, what? Fire Mage?! Oh dear god! Not ANOTHER GROUP OF HUMANS!? Gasp! Shock! Someone call the fantasy church! Fuckers.

Ooooh but their TEMPER! Everyone knows how UNSTABLE they are!

We should show them 'Unstable'. Make them regret what they've done.

'Bout to see up close and in person MY 'temper' and 'unstable' fuckin BOOT, old man!

No, I don't care if that made sense! Shut up! Fuck you! I get to be upset, okay!? This is nepotism and it's dangerous! And... and NO ONE LISTENS TO ME! It's like they're merrily marching towards a cliff and calling ME paranoid for pointing it out! Telling me to calm down. To stop exaggerating. It's a CLIFF!

The only one who listens? Is Alphard.

Alphard is our friend. Alphard listens to us. We should Trust Alphard.

Storming towards his office, shadows writhing in my wake, I seriously wonder. Would I have gone completely apeshit by now with out him? Left the clan? I don't know how he can bear it. The weight of their stubbornness. Their wilful blindness, which IS going to get people hurt. Killed. Probably already fuckin has.

How many more clansmen do we have to LOSE?

They'd tucked him away in some side wing, like some dirty little family secret. I'd always hated it. Big whoop! He gets two powers instead of one! Jealous ass little shits. It was fear and politics. I KNEW it was! He refused to say so, but I KNEW. And no amount of pained smiles and changing the subject would make me drop it!

It wasn't RIGHT.

God, the more time went on? The angrier I felt about it. The more it burned me. Ate me up inside. It's like my temper just...? Gah! Fuck this and fuck THEM! We don't need them! We should leave! Just the two of us. Go and never com-!

.....wait a second... that's not... right....

My head pounds with the worst sort of migraine. Shadows hissing like angry cats, as they crawled viciously around my head. Chasing whisps of something they can't seem to catch. I stopped between hallways. In one of our Clan's many, MANY shady areas. Leaning more into the darkness... helped. Made my head hurt less.

God, I've got to talk to talk to Alphard about this. It's starting to really worry me. The anger, the snarling flare ups, the dark moods. Not to mention the obsessive thoughts. It wasn't like me. Might be a curse? Maybe. Could be fire magic or related, so he would know. And if not? Well, nothing beats Fire for burning curses away.

....actually, Light, might. But we are A PROUDLY BIASED household here, thank you. So like? Not gonna SAY Shadow magic is BEST magic... BUT it absolutely, totally IS. And Alphard? OBVIOUSLY the greatest Fire Mage alive! No I will not be taking questions, thank you and goodnight.

We should see Alphard, we miss him.

Yeah... yeah I do really miss him, dont I? Where is he?

My head throbs viciously. Ow. It's been getting worse. My control too. My shadows fighting me at every turn. Which? Scares me more. Because YEAH, others? Have been big on the 'beat them into submission' tract of Shadow Mastery. But ME? No, no. I know for a FACT. You can not rule through fear. Not for long.

Bribery and alliances work wonders. Friendships and love. My shadows get FED. They get CUDDLES. I take my shadows for enrichment walkies and give them interesting puzzle boxes to play with. They fuckin LOVE me. Would meat thresher through CITIES if I asked.

So to suddenly Stop Listening?

It means they think I'm... I'm not myself. They are making the executive decision to act on my behalf, to protect me, even if they have to do so FROM me. And... and I don't know what's causing it. Don't know what's wrong or how to fix it. I'm getting scared.

Because something is very wrong.

Everything is fine.

Another wave of vicious hissing, of throbbing pain in my head. This time though... THIS time? I think I felt that. The discordant thoughts. The contradiction. That isn't me. There's something in me head that DEFINITELY isn't me! No there isn't. No WONDER my Shadows are so pissed! Fuck!

I stick to the darker hallways. It helps with concentration, the pain. Whatever is in my head? Is like sticky, burning, spiderwebs. Like trying to grab at thin lines of super heated metal, covered in tar. How... how LONG has it all BEEN there?

You should leave it. You don't know what you're doing. You could get hurt.

Oh fuuuuck YOU. Get out of my HEAD! Where is Alphard?

I stumble down the final hallway to his so called 'office'. It was a guest room once. As a kid, I helped him convert it. Back when the old fuck refused to step down, despite his son and heir, the next clan head, being DEAD. And? AND!? That Heir's fuckin chuunibyou kid being a tiny, insufferable, brat.

We get it! You're hurting! EVERYBODY'S hurting! Your fuckwit parents got HALF THE WARRIORS KILLED! We STILL haven't recovered from that. And Edgy pants goes on and ON about the 'glory of his ancestors' as though? He's not talking about his PARENTS. One generation fucking BACK!

That family ORPHANED me. But do you see ME starting shit? No!

Yet? God forbid the Old Bastard do what's RIGHT for the Clan! No, no! Between a literal infant, a FUCKING ZYGOTE, and a fully grown adult? Better pick the baby! Who CARES that Alphard was the better choice!? Chuunibyou brat is BLOOD! And we CAN'T have the 'half-breed' nephew in charge!

Better connections? More accomplishments? Fully trained and, once again, AN ADULT? All irrelevant. He's too fucking well liked! Too TRUSTED! Too much a THREAT to your precious little legacy and hold on power. So hey, fuck the rest of the Clan! Right? Why would WE need competent leadership!? You can just shove all the work you can no longer DO, on to Alphard.

Force him to rule in all but name. All but honor and title. Spit in his face then tell him to thank you.

Bastard!

He isn't there, in his over crowded office. Piles of paperwork. Empty tea cups, long cold. Mismatched pillows I'd stolen from around the compound, to make it feel less depressing. His classy art pieces mixing with my cheap, shitty ones. The souvenirs I'd brought back, again and again, because I do not forget my friends.

My head hurts so bad. How long has it been building?

Another wave of pain, as my Shadows hissing and growl in outrage, writhing like electric snakes around me. Safe and stronger, here in the unlit office of a friend. They want 'it' out. Hunt and hunt, but can not catch hold. How strong must the caster be? Older then me, probably. Far more experienced. I've been pretty diligent.

They'll stand no chance, though, against Alphard.

He's the best curse breaker I know. Honestly? He's the best at a lot of things. It's been great to learn from him. And he's? Gonna lose his SHIT. He already worries when I go out without him. But to find out somebody slipped a curse on me? Ooooh, shit. I'd almost laugh, if my head didn't feel like it was in a VICE.

Man's gonna feed them their KNEES.

As a PASTE.

.......I wonder, now that I think about it? Looking around the crowded office space? If Alphard has any pain meds? He SHOULD. There's no way in hell, he deals with chronic stupid all day without headaches. He should? Definitely have something for this. Probably. Might not actually FIX it, since it's magic based, but it can't HURT.

Decided, I get up. Slowly. Spread my shadows out. They love doing simple, achievable, tasks. Like 'find the box!' Or 'open this puzzle!', usually for treat rewards. (Cup time, usually. Or bits of my food. But honestly? They LOVE cup time. They like to hide under it and push it around the floor. Each group of them have favorite cups.)

Nothing but paper, cups, snacks, a couple piles of pillows, and a coat I had forgotten. Huh. Maybe his desk? Would make the most sense I suppose. It'd be on hand. Head and neck, one big regret, I stiffly shambled over. Organized chaos. More nonsense and damages caused by chuunibyou and his sycophants, in the name of luuuuuv~. God damn it.

At least no one died... this time.

I tear my eyes away from the top page. The one next to it? Shouting reports. Elves: pissed, werewolves: pissed, everybody: pissed. Guess who's fault? Oh fantastic! So THAT'S why he's not in his office. Probably trying to keep us all from dying. Another report after that. Protagonist-chan.... wow that's unflattering. Word it a little harsher, why don't you?

My eyes absent-mindedly keep scanning, as I look for a med box. Some sort of pill bottle. Something that might hold headache medication. Nothing on top of the desk. Drawer? Should be top right one, right? Since he's right handed? Easiest to reach. Let's see... pens, pens, spellwork paper, brushes, mints, bottle! AaaHAH! I hold it up to what little light there is and squint.

Wow. That's pretty strong. And not just for headaches.

.....should I have a talk with Alphard? Probably. Maybe? Definitely keep an eye on this. Don't wanna be jumping to conclusions, here. Still! Helpful. Down the hatch!

I pop back one of his pills, stealing one of his fancy tea in a can. He may complain, but we both know he won't stop me. Nor does he even mean it when he does. I'm like this sorta needy, demanding, housecat. I wander in, eat his food, tell him to pay attention to me, then wander off. Should have known better then to feed me, that first time~! He got stuck with me ever since.

Briefly a burning wire escape my grip. We should-Stop THAT! I beat it back down. Violently. It's taking a lot more concentration, more pain, then I'd like to admit, to fight it. Damn near wack a mole in my brain. There's no-CEASE! Desist! You are NOT welcome! Get! GET!

The pain meds are definitely helping. A LOT.

In fact...? Huh. Looking around? Without the pain to distract me? Those... aren't my shitty art works. Not the meme-y ones I bought, that I thought he'd like, nor the pieces I made in various art classes. They're just...? Random cheap art.

What the fuck?

Was Alphard ROBBED? Also? Where are HIS pieces? That one with the lady and the clearing? The couple dancing near the lake? That little statue? It's all random snobby fake art. Like someone wanted to give the IMPRESSION that nothing had changed, but had cleared out everything personal...

Alarmed. I looked down at the can I grabbed. It was the kind he offered to guests. Kept for me. Because... because he couldn't STAND it. Too sweet. Tearing the mini fridge back open? Nothing but cheap tea cans and teas he hated remained.

I slammed it closed. Urgently reached for the tea cubbies. Fancy LOOKING teas. The kind Alphard always makes fun of. Quality is in the tea, not the pretty pictures on the box, he says. His tea is GONE. Worse? MY drinks are gone! Why are MY drink-? The coat!

My hand snaps out. The coat flung into it by my shadows. The instant it touchs my palm, I know it is wrong. Too rough and too new. Some modified mimicry that my shadows could tell apart from the original. It's not their fault. They don't have senses like mine. I stare at it, feeling a building sense of panic, before look back up at the room around me.

Is... is ANYTHING where it should be?

Gaze snapping from place to place, shaking as the panic starts to swallow me whole, I realize... No. Not a single thing. It's all staged. Made to LOOK like nothing's wrong. When... when everything IS. Oh god. Where is Alphard? What the FUCK have they DONE to him?!

I drop the coat. The drink. Adrenaline slamming into me like a truck. Slamming the door open, I flood the hallway beyond with writhing, furious night. I AM Shadow and it IS Me. We run. Hunting, hurting, FURIOUS. If they have hurt our friend? If they DARE have-!

A howling whistle splits the night, closer, Closer, BANG. The compound rocks with the force of the explosion. The wards hiss to life like great titans of black sand. Ink dark, they nerely block out all light. Casting eerie spell light over the buildings below, as lights flip on. More whistling. Booms.

We are under attack.

For an instant, I am torn in two. Half of me? Demands I find my friend. They other half? Knows that I must protect the Clan. We stand together or we DIE together. Loyalty wins out. My parents, Alphard, the people I care about, they would never forgive me, if I abandoned my post now.

I turn from my hunt. Race towards the ward stones out front. I'll have to help the others reinforce them. Lend the Clan my strength. As long as they can't get in? We should be-

The wards SHUT OFF.

Even as I run, fast as I can, I watch with horrified eyes... as they slide back away. No. No no NO! They should do that! That CAN'T DO THAT! That's IMPOSSIBLE! Those are SEIGE Wards! Built over generations! Hundreds of mages poured power into them! Went over them with pin prick combs! They don't 'malfunction'!

Oh god. Please, God, NO!

Did someone SHUT THEM DOWN?!

Ahead, the sounds of violence and chaos draw near. Above, I can finally see what's raining down on us. It's war magic. FIRE war magic. Thrown from air ships, who's spotlights bathe the compound in a terrible, all consuming light. All the better, to prevent our Shadows from reaching even a single one of them.

Someone told. They didn't know about that limitation to our powers before. Our front gate! Open! Traitor, traitor, TRAITOR! WHO!?

Across the chaos, the bloodshed and death, familiar color catches my eye. Explosions and spotlights light him from above. The airships blades, kicking up leaves and dust. That familiar, familiar color. From his Father.... the fire mage.

Alphard stands so calmly, one hand still resting on the command stone for the wards. As chaos reigns around him. The pleased little smile on his face, the one he wears, when all his plans come together, ever so nicely. No. Please. No.

His eyes are so cold. So flat.

He feels nothing as they die. Doesn't even glance, at the kinsmen desperately calling his name. Dying at his feet. He... he doesn't look away. Just raises one hand, one finger, and...

"Shhhhhh~ Be. Good." He says, utterly silent in his betrayal.

My world shatters.

I run.

Slamming my palm against the evacuation alarm, sirens begin to blare. It's over. It's all... all fucking over. How could he? H-How COULD-? Grief wants to choke me, blind me, but I don't have the TIME. I have to get out. Survive. I.. I can cry later. Mourn for the friend I THOUGHT I had, later. I trusted him. FUCK, I TRUSTED him!

I skid around the corner, heading towards the closest exit. Gotta grab my bug out b-!

Shadows in the darkened hallway surge, up and over, like a heavy hand slamming down. I barely drag myself out of the way. Lose my footing as I do. Go crashing to the floor. Scrambling, I turn as my shadows hiss, only to be met with deeper rumbling thunder. Shit. No!

I try to get up. Fling my self up into a run. Only to meet a shadow formed backhand. Smashed, thrown. Finding myself slammed back, onto the floor, wheezing. The air knocked out of me. Lightly, dark shapes takes form. Alphard stepping through blank and barren wall, using the Shadows under his control as a medium.

Not a hair out of place.

Just the two of us.

Alone.

"Why the rush, mischief?" He teased lightly, as though my world was not collapsing, all around us. As though my best friend had not betrayed me, betrayed US, to our doom. Up and down the hall, sirens blared. "You look upset."

I snarled. Grief and betrayal twisting into something ugly in my chest. Hand whipping out, I aimed for his fucking throat.

"Ah~, you're mad. Is this because I didn't consult with you first? Mischief, there was so much to do! You know you hate all those boring political meetings. Alliance work and archival research. Sweetie, there were stake outs! You hate those."

Effortlessly, he leaned out of the way of my attacks, looking amused and unbothered as he continued to speak. I RAGED. Screamed. Taking chunks of the wall behind me, to use as projectiles. Anything. Anything, anything, ANYTHING! Just HURT, damn you! TRAITOR! How COULD YOU!?

In the distance... the haunting, damning, final cries of my kin, as the died.

I Trusted You!

"I know~" he laughed, as though nothing had changed. As though this were a fucking GAME! "It was so easy, too."

His voice became two toned in a way that could only be magic. One that was heard, one that was felt. One that... that I had...! Realization did not crash. It seeped, like the cold and fatal poison it was. His betrayal was not NEW... was it? Not SUDDEN.

I... I had been betrayed long, long ago.

No you weren't. Alphard loves you~

How long had he been in my head? He was my magical instructor. I had hated the Clan's main teachers. Right? DID I? Could I even know? H..How much? For HOW LONG?! I was a CHILD! Had no defenses against the manipulations of my mind! Would you really stoop so LOW?! Was ANYTHING real!? ANY part of out friendship-!?

I choked, on the sob I refused to let him have. He... he didn't have the RIGHT.

"Oh, Mischief." He said, sounding mournful as he strolled easily through the ruins I had created around us. "Don't cry. Shhh, shhhh. It's okay, dear. You're upset. This is upsetting, I understand that. But we will preserver, overcome, and together? We will get through this."

We? There was no 'WE'. N-Not anymore. Not after THIS.

"Oh but that's where you're wrong, Mischief." He breathes out, like the confession of the truely insane, his voice soft. Yet, somehow? Bonechilling in how loud it seemed.

"I get you."

"That's the first thing I demanded, after all! No more idiots. No more dead weight. No insults, fools, or brats I can't break! Ha ha! Just me and my Mischief! Free at last! And all it cost me? Was my chains. Best of all? All the idiot Fire brat wanted for it all? Was his 'competition' out of the way! Ha ha ha! Gods bless, usefull fools!"

He stood before me now. Head thrown back, hand over his eyes in disbelief, as he laughed and laughed. Unhinged with his euphoria. With the machinations, that had lead to his victory. And... and I could not recognize him. This... this monster wearing the face of my best friend. I felt numb. Cold and far away. I... I just... I wanted to go away... please, God. Far, far away.

Stop it. Please, Alphard... Stop it...

P-please...

My shadows curled around me. Battered, torn, but ever loyal. They would not leave me. Not even now. Not even to save themselves. Weakly hissing. Thrashing, trying, in their own small ways, to appear bigger and stronger threats then they were. In... in the vain hope that... that the thing that was hurting us? Might believe them.

Might leave me alone.

I had never felt so unsafe, surrounded by the shadows sworn to my once friend. How many times? How many times? Had I fed and played with these very Magics? Snuck them charcoal? Interesting toys to burn? Creatures of fire and shadow. Massive and rumbling, the very Shadows that once played with my own... now tore them apart.

It burned. Hurt. Who...? WHO was this man? This monster? That wore my best friends face? I couldn't... I can't... please! God, please! Don't make me do this anymore...

My mind, somewhere between delirious and screaming, for some god forsaken reason? Reminded me of the Quite Game. I... I wondered, terrified and full of grief, if the children would know to run. Not to wait, for parents that... that would not be coming. Not this time. Not ever again. All because of this man.

The smoke on the breeze terrified me. Everything terrified me. How? How could I possibly hold so much fear? How could there possibly be MORE? Just as I think I can not feel it anymore deeply. Once again, Alphard teaches me I am wrong. This... this is not how he, is... is supposed to be... how WE are...!

"Oh sweetheart, mischief, darling..." He again attempted to sooth, hand slipping away from his face as he rolled his head down to peer at me. Kneeling with almost boneless fluidity. "None of that. No more tears. Alphy's here, okay? I know change is scary. And you're upset and confused. But Alphy loves you just like always, and nothings gonna happen to you, alright?"

"Remember how you wanted to travel before? See those festivals? Go abroad? We get to do that now! Alphy can take CARE of you, now. Properly. Get you all the things you deserve. It'll be great, Mischief. No more stress or tears. Cuddles for days. You'll love it, I promise."

From beneath his feet, spreading like a terrible rot, black fire spread. It didn't touch me. Couldn't, as it seemed to reach, with greedy hands, down the halls. Consuming the only home I'd ever known in this life. Consuming everyone it touched, if the distant sounds of panic, were any indication. He was killing them all. Friend, foe, what difference was there?

Everything burned.

Numb, I could only sit there, before the stranger I thought I'd known.

"Our love story's been a long time coming, sweetness. My perfect, beautiful, Mischief~♡. Once we're free? We'll never look back. Have the happily ever after we deserve. Let the rest of the burn."

"I'm so glad I found you, Mischief. So glad I made you mine. It's going to be beautiful, darling. I promise. You'll thank me."

"Now come here, to Alphy. We're gonna play a game~♡"

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drvscarlett · 1 year ago

Text

About You Pt5

Sebastian Vettel x Webber!Reader

Summary: Everyone knows about the history of Sebastian Vettel and Mark Webber. But there's a well kept story within the paddock about Sebastian Vettel and another Webber. This is that story.

About You Series 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

A/N: and its a double update!!! im showcasing a lot of side characters that will eventually be a huuuuge part of the plot (winks). also the brewing tension. let me know what you folks think about this

Taglist: @spideybv28 @randomcuboidshape @mehrmonga @casperlikej @cliosunshine @honethatty12 @randomgirlnumber-13 @sugyomama @ririyulife @skywalker1dream @vicurious28 @cristianovettel @callsignwidow @gothicwidowsworld

2010, Istanbul Park

The necklace sits heavy on Y/N's neck. She had been fiddling with it the whole morning. There was something about the internal and unspoken pressure happening in the Red Bull garage ever since both of their drivers tied their points for the championship. She have heard more conversations here and there about who would Red Bull side with, their older driver or the rookie.

It was very stressful for Y/N to spend time with the two drivers involved with the discussions.

"Nervous?" Sebastian noticed.

"Can't help it" she gave a weak smile.

"For me or for Mark?"

Y/N had to resist the urge to roll her eyes. As if she hasn't had enough of this whole which driver would you pick to side on. She just gestured that her lips are sealed meaning that she won't take anyone's side.

"Stop trying to get my sister on your side" Mark apparently overheard the conversation "Blood runs thicker than water, am i right sis?"

"I'm not gonna comment on that"

"See what you are doing to my sister, you are ruining this family Seb" Mark overdramatically reacts

"Your sister is my bestfriend, get over it" Sebastian rebutted.

Bestfriend.

And just like that, there was a pang in Y/N's heart. Maybe another factor of the heavy feeling is that she has been doing her best to bury her feelings for Sebastian. But after the whole Monaco pre-birthday thing, every effort that she has to bury her feelings is thrown out of the window. She was hopelessly inlove with the man and Sebastian was very blind about it.

"Just have a good race, okay?"she reminded the two.

"I think we will score some good points today" Sebastian confidently stated.

"That's the fighting spirit" Mark cheered on.

It was moments like this that Y/N was reminded that the two Red Bull drivers are not fighting each other as the team pictured them to be. They may showcase competitiveness during the races but that's just normal. Outside the track, the two share a very friendly atmosphere with each other.

Soon, the two set off to go their respective cars. Y/N watched the race outside of the driver's room for a change. Ever since, she started to hear the gossiping of the Red Bull crew about Seb and Mark, she opted to be more around them. She wanted to know what they are saying to warn the drivers or make a possible plan on how to resolve if ever the situation escalates.

The race started out well with Mark leading comfortably. Sebastian was behind and Lewis was next. It was going really well for Mark and if Y/N have to say it then he might win another race. Sebastian, on the other hand, has been challenged by the two McLarens of Hamilton and Button.

Then it happened all so quickly.

Y/N let out a gasp as the two Red Bull drivers crashed with each other. One was sent down to the gravel while the other managed to push back to the track. Y/N was too focused that she didn't notice that the cameras were pointed at her.

'Y/N Webber

Mark Webber's sister and assistant, Sebastian Vettel's bestfriend.'

The whole garage was in shambles as the radio messages from Sebastian sounds really angry. The amount of swear words in the radio was a stark difference from the jolly Sebastian that she was speaking to a couple of minutes ago. Y/N looked worriedly as Sebastian goes to the stewards.

"It was Vettel's fault"

"No, Mark Webber wasn't looking and giving him space"

"That's stupid, it was clearly Sebastian Vettel's fault"

Watching the replays, Y/N hates to admit it but this one is on Sebastian. She could hear the discussion even becoming more rampant as Sebastian reaches the garage.

A permanent scowl graces his face as he talks to Helmut and Christian about the incident that occurred. Y/N followed to check up on him and she can't help but overhear the conversation.

"That was not right, this shouldn't have happened" Christian lectures "It will cost us a lot of points with the two McLaren looking for two podium finish today"

"Don't look and point fingers at me, I'm not the only one who crashed" Sebastian clearly not thinking his words through.

"Sebastian this should never happen again, understood?" Christian firmly ordered

"But it isn't right to blame Sebastian, the boy is right there were two of them there" Helmut comes to the defense of Sebastian "It was clear that Mark did not make way for him resulting to the crash"

Y/N felt herself getting red. It was clear as a day that the crash was not caused by Mark. It was getting clearer for her that someone has been playing favorites.

"See, you better have word with Mark" Sebastian said.

"Unbelievable" Y/N muttered.

She was taught that if she couldn't say anything good then she probably shouldn't say anything at all so she walks away. She decided not to show herself even after Mark got a podium finish.

Her sudden disappearance did not go unnoticed but Sebastian just let her be.

2010, Silverstone Circuit

Things at Red Bull garage has gone from bad to worse. It was difficult now to hang out with Mark or Sebastian as the two drivers have intended everything to be a competition. Y/N didn't want to see any part of this which is why she is currently doing babysitting duties at Mercedes.

It was a weird set-up seeing how one of Red Bull's employee is staying at the pristine white facility of Mercedes—she sticks out like a sore thumb. But Mick Schumacher only wants Y/N to be with him as he watches his father race. It has always been that case ever since Y/N met Mick when he was around 4 years old.

"Y/N, are you not scared for your brother and Seb?" Mick asked as the two of you watched the cars go out for the formation lap.

"I used to be scared" she still is "But its something that they love"

"Mama says Papa gives her a lot of stress when he races. I hope there is no aksident"Mick's tone was with a slight worry.

"Your Papa will be okay, he is a legend"Y/N assures.

The cars are now slowly lining up to the starting grid. Sebastian was on pole while Mark was the 2nd one so they were sharing a Red Bull front row. It only made Y/N worry even more because race starts are quite chaotic here in Silverstone.

"Mark and Seb must be really lucky to be at the front"Mick commented

"I sure hope so"

The lights started flashing and the infamous lights out and away we go went off. It was indeed chaotic at the start with Sebastian and Mark neck to neck with each other. They were both trying to take the lead even if it means pushing the other off track.

"OH FUCK" Y/N immediately covered the ears of Mick as the collision was broadcasted.

Mark managed to go through but Sebastian had puncture. The German was obviously mad for losing crucial places.

"What happened Y/N to Mark and Seb, I thought they are teammates" was the confused question of Mick.

She sighs. Her thoughts are echoing what Mick just said. What happened to them.

"Mick,they are still teammates its just that they also have to compete with each other. Its a sports and sometimes we lose,sometimes we win"Y/N tried to explain it to 10-year-old Mick.

She could already imagine the chaos in the Red Bull garage. She hears the commentaries that maybe this was Webber's revenge for Istanbul. The headache that will emerge for her after this whole race will be very difficult to ignore.

"Y/N if I become an f1 driver,would you come see me?"Mick asked

Its like heaven sent an angel in the form of Mick for Y/N. When she hears him talk it feels as if the world is slightly a little simpler and better. How she wish she lives in that same bubble as Mick.

"I won't crash, I promise"Mick added

Young Mick is still very young but he really dreams to be a Formula 1 driver like his father. Y/N could feel grey hairs developing if she sees Mick in an F1 car.

"Of course Mick"

"Good"Mick grinned "Oh look Y/N your brother is leading! Go Mark Webbahhhhhh"

The cheers of the little Schumacher made Y/N grin. She will deal with all the Red Bull stress later.

2010, Hockenheimring

Usually, Y/N likes getting her coffee at the catering but she doesn't feel like interacting with any Red Bull team for this morning. This is why the Webber girl is seen queuing up in a local Starbucks.

She was just about to sit down and wait for her coffee when a random man bumped her. It sent all her paper flying and Y/N could only grumble since the man didn't even look at her to help.

"Some people these days lack manners"she huffed in frustration.

It was a good thing that someone was helping her picking up the paper. She looked at the bracelets adorning her wrist and the long blonde hair tied up into a bun, thank God for a woman.

"Thank you so much for helping me" Y/N started "You really didn't have to"

"Nonsense, it will be rude to just stare at you picking up your papers"the woman has a thick German accent, similar to Sebastian.

She is probably local, Y/N thinks.

"Still thank you" Y/N politely insisted "Do you want to sit with me, the whole cafe is full"

"Of course"

Y/N wasn't usually chatty but the woman is very comfortable to talk to. She mentioned that she was a local but she lives a bit far from here and that she was only here for the weekend. Y/N shared how she is also here for the weekend.

"Wait are you going to watch Formula 1?" she quizzed

Y/N was about to answer when she heard the call of the barista. he quickly picked up her coffee and went back to her new friend.

"No way, you are Y/N?THE Y/N Webber?" the girl repeated.

Y/N chuckled. It wasn't usual that she has been recognized by formula 1 fans. She felt red as she admits that she is a bit flattered that she knows her name.

"I didn't know I am famous around here"Y/N joked

"Sebastian always talks about you, I was really looking forward to see you later at the garage"

Oh? Y/N thinks there is only one Sebastian that she knows.

"My name is Hanna, Hanna Prater" she introduced "I'm Sebastian's childhood bestfriend"

2010, Circuit de Spa-Francorchamps

Sebastian was bitter. He felt as if he lost a golden opportunity by not being able to score any points today. He is so bitter that he choose not to celebrate with the team tonight and he intended to stay holed up in his hotel room.

However, after a while,he grew tired of the hotel room walls so he ended up walking at the rooftop of the hotel.

Only,he wasn't the only one there.

"Hey stranger" he called out "I haven't seen you in Red Bull garage for a while"

Y/N turned around and she smiled when she met his eyes.

He doesn't understand how she does it but everything seems to melt in the background when she does this. It felt like he was back in his rookie days when they met up at the rooftops and talk for hours. It was much more simpler back then.

"I have been busy.. socializing" Y/N replied.

They both know that was a lie. Y/N was obviously using socializing as a front when in truth is she doesn't like to mingle with the toxicness of the Red Bull garage. But, Sebastian lets it slide.

"Is it bad that I missed you and I want you to stay at the garage?"Sebastian popped the question out of the blue.

"I'll be there as Mark's sister and his assistant, I don't think it will work well with the situation" Y/N informed.

There it goes again. This was that line that Sebastian has been hindering him to confess or ask her out.

It felt so stupid that he can flirt with anyone with ease but when it comes to Y/N, its so hard.He shouldn't have been scared of Mark, he is never scared of Mark (and it shows multiple times on track). But the thing that Sebastian knows is that Y/N has high regards for her brother and Sebastian didn't want to put a strain in their family.

"How are you feeling with the race today?"Y/N asked, diverting the topic.

"I could have been better." Sebastian sighs "Maybe I should train over and over again"

"Don't push yourself, you are still in the pool for the championship" Y/N assures

The championship. It's everything that Sebastian has ever thought of lately. Its within his reach and he really wants to extend a lead with it but somehow its not working. He really thinks that there is a high possibility that he can get his first championship this year.

"The championship must feel really nice" Y/N comments as she observes the smile on Sebastian's face

"I mean that's why were all racing dangerously" Sebastian chuckles.

No sane man would want to race in harsh conditions or beyond normal speed limit without any incentives.

"Just don't lose yourself"Y/N said "I worry about you Seb"

He acknowledges that. He is not dumb that the Red Bull crew has been pitting him and Webber against each other. In the end, it places a pressure on both of them to perform well because all that Red Bull cares about is who will bring the victory. The more likely victor will be the more favored one.

"We'll be alright" Sebastian comforts.

Even if this is all a lie, the two finds that comfort and repeat it to themselves. Maybe if they repeat it a lot then maybe it will end up coming true.

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #sebastian vettel x reader #sebastian vettel imagines #f1 fic #f1 angst #f1 x you #sebastian vettel x you

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adventuringblind · 1 year ago

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Misinterpreted

Charles Leclerc x Reader

Genre: Fluff and Crack

Summary: She couldn't see what everyone else could. Not until it hits her all at one.

Warnings: enemies to lovers, a whole lotta blushing

Notes: Thanks to the requester for this idea!! Sorry it's so short...

Masterlist // Request Form // My Website // buy me a Ko-Fi

It's not like she meant to hate him. She just couldn't see what everybody else was.

Charles is just another person like the rest of them. Yet people still fawn over him like he's been sent from the god's.

At least, that's what she thought growing up. Going through karting and the feeder series with Charles was torture. She was just there, trying to carve her way into formula 1. He had everyone chanting his name, loved by many, the future golden boy of Ferrari.

She'd made it a point to stay far away from him. Simply because she never saw the point of conversing. Definitely not because she is terrified of speaking to people in general.

"Watcha staring at?" Max sidle's up next to her and wiggles her eyebrows. She squeaks out a noise and lets herself calm down from the startle. Leave it to her teammate to know what she's doing.

"None of your business."

"Really? Because it looks to me like you're staring at Charles."

She violently hushes Max. "Shh! Someone could hear you!"

Max rolls his eyes before smirking at her. He looks pointedly at the Monegasque with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Don't you dare-"

He whistles, successfully grabbing Charles' attention. He smiles and waves him over. "You'll be fine!"

She can feel the blush spreading across her face. Her hand slaps Max's shoulder playfully. She moves to make an escape, like she has to be anywhere else but here.

Max grabs her wrist, looking playful, but there is that look in his eyes that says he will force her if she doesn't comply. Needless to say, she sits back down. Her eyes fall in love with the dirty grey of the cement ground.

"Hello you two!" He sounds so happy for this early in the morning. She briefly looks at her watch.

Correction: He's so happy at two in the afternoon. Why is he even happy at this time? Charles, apparently.

"Charlie! We were just talking about you." Max jabs an elbow into her side.

"All good things, I hope. I know I'm not a favorite to some." She can feel his obnoxiously pretty eyes burning holes into her.

Max barks out a laugh, then looks between the two of them. "Okay, I can feel the tension. Which is saying something, since normally I'm the one creating it."

Charles gives a wary look to the female still sinking into herself. "I wouldn't be opposed to lessening the tension."

"Great! I'll send her your way tonight at eight."

"Sounds like a plan."

Charles leaves the two alone finally and she sobs in relief. "Why are you crying? I though you liked him!"

"I do! That's the problem."

~~~~~

Max drags her to some restaurant, sits her at the table with Charles and threatens to ram her off the line if she tries to leave. He followed through with his last threat. She's not willing to risk Christian's wrath for her pride.

She attempts conversation with Charles. It feels awkward and tense. The regret and insecurity rattles around her mind. Why is he even here? He could be off doing other things with people he actually likes.

"Why do you dislike me? I've been wanting to ask you for years so I could apologize for whatever I did."

And.... what? She stares at him in disbelief. Unsure of how to explain that she didn't have an interest in anything but racing until she got to F1 and finally realized how ethereal he looks?

"Didn't know you thought that way!" Charles is glowing.

"Did I say that aloud?"

"Yeah, but it's nice hearing such a compliment you."

She hides her face behind her menu, only to have Charles take it away from her. He reaches further and gently pulls her gaze towards him-

She's going to combust. This is how it ends. Death by forced and prolonged eye contact.

"So, if I asked you out again, would you say yes this time?"

She nods her head yes. A little too enthusiastically.

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sashaisready · 11 months ago

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This Must Be The Place: Chapter 16 - She lifted up her wings

Biker!Bucky x Femme Reader

Back at your beloved late grandmother's home to pack up her house, you have a run-in with the town's biker gang 'The Howling Commandos' and find yourself entangled with the metal armed President.

Series Masterlist

Warnings: some light references to grief/loss

Okay gang we are getting close to the end now. Thanks for all your lovely reblogs and comments, honestly it means so much. I'm so glad you've been enjoying this story along with me and I hope you're happy with how it ends!

You were woken up some time later by the rays of sunlight shining through Sally’s windows. Finally, daytime had arrived again. You stirred, grunting as you stretched and tried to wake up your still-sleeping limbs. Your back wouldn’t let you forget this one in a hurry. Your throat was bone dry and you would happily trade an organ for a glass of water at this point. You caught a glimpse of yourself in the rearview mirror, grimacing at the unsightly red and blue bruise that had crept over your cheek overnight. It felt tender and sore, a fetching souvenir from the evening before.

You didn’t let your thoughts turn to Bucky or Peter, and how stupid you’d been to refuse help…no, focus on your plan of action – get home. Find the gas station. Find a phone, or at the very least a charger for yours. Everything else could wait.

You unlocked the car door and slipped your heels on before easing out, walking around the side of vehicle. You stepped out onto the empty road, raising your arms to loosen your muscles. As you took a step forward you squeaked in surprise.

Bucky was sitting on the road, his back leaning against Sally’s driver’s door as his head slumped to the side with his chin pressed into his shoulder. He was asleep. Only then did you notice his bike parked up a few feet from the car.

You gawped in surprise at his slouched form. What the…

As if he’d felt your confusion, he suddenly groaned, his eyes fluttering open as he leaned forward and stretched.

“Ah fuck, that’s gonna come back to bite me,” he frowned as he got to his feet.

He brushed himself down and cracked his neck. He stifled a yawn as he turned to you.

“Oh good, you’re up”, he remarked casually, in the same way he used to after you’d appeared in his kitchen after staying over at his place.

He strolled over to his bike, leaning and picking up a toolbox from the side of it. He laid it across his bike seat, flipping it open and grabbing a wrench and a few other tools.

You watched in stunned silence as he casually retrieved a bottle of water from the bottom of the kit, passing it over to you. You took it dumbly and stared down at it in your hand.

He then moved to Sally, popping the hood, and inspecting the engine.

“Bucky…” you uttered, your voice quiet and scratchy.

“Mm?” he asked as he fiddled around under the hood.

“Did you…”

“Sleep there?” he asked without emerging, “Yeah. Of course,” he replied, as if it was obvious.

“That…that whole time?”

“Sure”.

“What…just…out on the road, like that, the whole time?”

He lowered the hood again to look over at you, “Yeah. Well…you weren’t gonna let me in, and I was gonna leave you there so…” he trailed off.

You blinked in confusion, and he stared right back at you, undeterred.

“And…and what, you were just carrying that toolbox on your bike?” you scoffed.

“No…Steve dropped it off this morning after I texted him. And I asked him for some water as I thought you’d need it. Got a granola bar in there too if you want it”.

The two of you stared at each other.

“Bucky…that’s insane…” you whispered.

“Is it?” he asked incredulously, “You really think I’d leave you at the side of the road by yourself, asleep in your car? I don’t care how mad at me you are. I’d say it was more insane to not let me help…”

“But…”

You bit your lower lip as your head spun, unable to find the words. You were simply overwhelmed that he’d done this.

Taking your lack of response as his cue, he stepped back to the car. As he moved you could see the physical pain in his body from the stiffness of his posture and the way his limbs moved, you couldn’t even imagine how he’d managed to get any sleep like that – you had struggled and you at least had shelter, something soft to lay on and a blanket.

He’d really done that…for you?

Without the spotlight of his gaze, you took the opportunity to unscrew the bottle cap. You turned away from him as you drank from it frantically and felt that instant relief, not wanting him to see your desperate guzzling.

He continued tinkering under the hood and called out to you, “I know you said no to me helping but I’m pretty sure I can get you back on the road, then you can drive home and go back to ignoring me. So please just let me do this one thing, and then I’ll be out of your hair”.

You crossed your arms in annoyance as you frowned and lowered the bottle, but couldn’t really turn his offer down. Bastard.

“Rough night, huh?” he asked tentatively as he eyed you from over the hood.

You tilted your head at him, your sour expression making it clear you weren’t going to elaborate.

He winced but nodded and resumed his work. It was quiet for a while; the only sounds were the clang of his tools and the quiet hum of traffic nearby.

He cleared his throat.

“I think I’m being very restrained here in not asking you about that bruise on your face,” he said calmly from behind the hood, “Because if I’m right about who I think did that…” he tensely blew out a long puff of air.

“It wasn’t like that,” you replied softly, gently cupping your hand to your cheek. “He’s a jerk. But this was an accident. A genuine one”.

He leaned over the hood to look over at you, frowning at you with his famous ‘are you kidding me?’ expression you’d seen many times before.

You rolled your eyes, “Bucky, it’s the truth…”

His jaw visibly tightened; you could see him exhaling as he kept himself together. “He hurt you…” he mumbled, the twinge of sadness in his tone upsetting you more than you expected.

You shook your head, “Not on purpose. He was drunk and uncoordinated. It was clumsy, not malicious. I promise”.

He frowned but seemed to accept your answer, or accept it for now at least.

“It’s for me to handle. Not you. I don’t want you touching him. He told me that you threatened him…” you scowled.

“I didn’t threaten him, I just told him to treat you right or I’d find out if he didn’t…and, well, looks like he didn't...”

Now it was your turn to give him the ‘are you kidding me?’ eyes.

“I don’t need you to interrogate my dates, or rough ‘em up…even if they do deserve it a little…” you chided.

“Alright…I’m sorry. Okay? I just…wanted you to be happy,” he relented sheepishly with a sigh. “Wasn’t gonna do nothing…”

You scoffed at his obvious lie.

“It’s really not your business,” you scoffed, “I’m a person with autonomy who can date who she likes. It’s not your place to intimidate or fight them, even if they are an asshole”.

He nodded, “You’re right. I’m sorry. I won’t ask about him, okay? But if you change your mind…”

You scowled and he tilted his head questioning towards your bruise.

“I just need to know you’re not in a dangerous situation” he said gravely.

“I’m safe, I was always safe - but it’s over any way,” you mumbled quietly.

He nodded; you could see he was trying to remain calm, but a hint of a storm threatened to overtake his face. You wouldn’t tell him that you were secretly impressed he managed to keep it together.

"Well...I'd tell you I'm sorry. But I wouldn't lie to you," he frowned, "does it hurt?” he asked quietly.

“A little…but nothing some ice and painkillers won’t fix” you responded.

He clenched his jaw, and you could see his fingers tightening around the wrench he was holding, but he swallowed and then quickly resumed his post at the car.

It got quiet for again as he worked on the engine and you stood on the roadside, your arms crossed as your emotions bubbled over. Your fatigue and hastily buried feelings were beginning to ooze out.

“I hate that you’re doing this,” you spat.

“I know,” he replied gravely as he emerged again. “I got a pretty good idea of your stance last night”.

“Don’t think this magically makes us square. You fucked up, you hurt me. You didn’t trust me. That doesn’t just go away because you took a martyr nap on the concrete and helped to fix my car,” you told him, a little angrier than you expected.

“I know,” he replied, nonplussed by your anger but not dismissive, “I completely understand why you feel like you do”.

You nodded self-consciously, your shoulders dropping their defensive stance as your voice softened, “You really hurt me…Bucky”.

He looked up at you with such intensity in his eyes you almost couldn’t look back at him, “I know I did. And I’m sorry. It’s been killing me, really, it has. I’ve been a complete, fuckin’ mess without you Sug. Seriously. The guys are sick of hanging out with me because they’re sick of my moping. Hell, I’m sick of me, too”.

He kicked at a stone on the roadside as he dropped his head. You squeezed the water bottle tightly in your hand, the plastic cracking loudly as you tried to digest what he’d just told you.

He looked at you again, seemingly a little more composed, “I’ve been thinking about it a lot and trying to learn from what happened. And I know you don’t forgive me. And that’s okay…I wish I could take it back. But I can’t. All I can do is try to be better and respect how you feel. And I’ll live the rest of my life with that on my conscience. I can’t fix it if you don’t want me to. But what I can do, right now, is fix your car. Not because I want to impress you or win you over, but because you need help – and this is help I can actually give you.”

You blanched, surprised by the earnestness of his tone and the sense of self-awareness you’d never seen in him before.

He stepped towards you, but seemed to hesitate and took a step back again. The two of you stood in the stiffness of the silence, much unsaid but also too much spoken. You so desperately wanted to talk to him, but no words would come.

He cleared his throat, then awkwardly shifted back to Sally. He opened the driver’s door and leaned over, flicking on the ignition. Sally hummed to life again.

“That’s better”, he said as he moved to close the hood, “She could probably do with a real tune-up, though”.

“T-thank-you, Bucky,” you said softly, your gaze dropping to the ground, “I appreciate it”.

“S’ok”, he shrugged. “Now you can get home and ice that bruise”.

You nodded, your hand moving to your cheek. “And…thank-you. For…staying. That was…that was…”

“It’s no trouble,” he cut you off, as casually as if he’d given you change for a dollar.

“The house goes on the market next week,” you found yourself telling him as you looked back up, but you weren’t sure why.

“Ah. Good,” he nodded, jaw clenched. “You’ve worked hard on it. I’m…I’m sure it’ll be a lovely home, for somebody”.

“Yes. I hope,” you replied dully, “Still haven’t done the fence…”

He chuckled warmly, then his expression saddened somewhat. He opened his mouth to speak, but then he stopped.

“What?” you asked as you observed his hesitation, “What were you going to say?”

He grimaced then clicked his jaw, you could see him debating whether or not to say whatever it was.

“I hope this isn’t out of line…” he uttered quietly as he shoved his hands in his pockets, “But did you ever wonder if you’ve been putting off the fence…because part of you isn’t ready to give up her house yet?”

You flinched, chewing on your lip as tears threatened to spill. His observation cut you to the bone, and you reeled silently at just how just how well he knew you. How he truly saw you.

“Maybe,” you squeaked, unable to say much more.

“You wouldn’t…it wouldn’t be giving her up…you know,” he replied as he idly rubbed at a spot on Sally’s paintwork, his eyes not being able to find yours, “Don’t…feel guilty about it. She’d want you to be happy”.

You nodded frantically as you swallowed back a sob, “Thank-you, Bucky”.

He looked at you sadly and for a moment you thought he was going to speak again, but he just pointed to your car. “You better get going…I’ll just make sure you get on the road okay before I head out myself. Maybe I can catch a few hours of sleep in actual bed”.

You smiled at him weakly as you got into your car and began to pull away. He held up his hand to wave goodbye as you drove off, and you watched as his figure slowly shrank in your rearview mirror.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x you #james bucky barnes #this must be the place fic #biker!bucky #motorcycle club au bucky

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ahgasegotarmy116 · 1 year ago

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The Art of Etiquette Part 1 | Jeon Jungkook

Summary: Your Step Father would like to introduce you into high society but you're required to take lessons to learn how to play the part and from your instructor's perspective it seems like you have a lot of catching up to do. Pairing: f!reader x Etiquette instructor Jungkook Word Count: 2.2k Warnings: Explicit Language, not really anything else at this point lol a/n: Planning on turning this into a short series so please let me know what you think <3 p.s. this is horribly edited and was written in one sitting lol

"Why do I have to suffer the consequences of the decisions you made for this family?" I say chasing after my mother as she walks down the main hallway in our new home. "Y/n becoming a debutant is not a consequence" she says, making her way into the main living room.

"To me it is" I complain, dreading this entire ordeal already. "The whole process only lasts about a year so-"

"A year? You expect me to be parade around in pretty dresses and entertain people I have absolutely no interest in just because you decided to marry a rich man? Yeah, no I'm not doing it" I say, watching as she takes a seat on the couch waiting for me to tell her my grievances, knowing that I won't back down easily.

"It's not a huge commitment I promise. You'll have etiquette lessons twice a week, go to a fitting every once in a while and take dance lessons once a week. I'm sure you can sacrifice a few hours out of your week for this. Your father wa-" "Step father" I cut her off, making my stance on the man known.

"Your step father wants to introduce you as his daughter and the best way to do so would be having you come out at a debutant ball" she explains hoping to show me their reasoning behind it. "Oh I'm straight so don't worry I won't be needing a coming out event or anything like that" I say teasing her.

"Very funny" she says clearly unamused, "I would really appreciate it if you just did this for us, and if you don't want to do it for us then do it for you, for your future. Do you know how pivotal this moment could be for you? A lot of important people go to these balls so if you want to make a name for yourself in this city then that's a great place to start" she says hoping to entice me, showing how this could benefit me as well.

"Just think about it, okay?" she says standing up to leave the room and placing a hand on my shoulder as a sign of reassurance, leaving me conflicted.

~~~~~

A few days later at the breakfast table I finally decide to give them my answer. "Um, dad" I say hoping to get his attention. "Yes honey?" he says putting down the newspaper that he had just been flipping through.

"I think I want to go through with this whole debutant thing if you still wanted me to" I say playing with my sleeve, still unsure of the choice I've made but I guess theres no going back now. "That's great! I'll contact the agency and get all of your lessons set up straight away" he smiles, quickly texting his assistant Matthew and asking him to get things set in motion.

"Would you prefer private lessons or would you like to take them with some of the other girls that are preparing to come out as well?" he questions, still looking down at his phone. "Oh it's okay don't worry about getting her pri-" "Private lessons would be great" I say cutting my mom off.

The less interactions I can have with these spoiled rich kids, the better. I send her a tight lipped smile, telling her to back off before I change my mind and she does just that.

"Alright, I have Matthew working on it now so we could probably get everything set up by the time your classes end this afternoon. You finish up at four right?" he asks, catching me off guard.

"You know my class schedule?" I question. "Of course I do! What kind of father would I be if I didn't pay attention to my daughter's academics?" he says, giving me a warm smile before taking one last sip of his coffee and standing up to go.

"I've gotta head off, love you" he says giving my mother a quick peck and then coming over to me to give me a kiss on the top of my head. "Have a good day you two" he says to us as his final adieu, heading out to where his driver is waiting for him.

"Thank you" my mother says, happy with the effort I'm putting into assimilating our family. "I'm doing this for you guys, but I'm also doing this for me. Like you had said, I guess I'll just have to suffer through it for the next year" I say, already questioning myself.

"I promise you won't regret it!" she reassures me, reaching out for my hand across the table and I mirror her action. 'I sure hope not' I say to myself and give her a pained smile before leaving to head off to class.

~~~~

"You're what?" my friend Jesse say, not believing a word I just said.

"I'm gonna start taking lessons to become a debutante" I say, repeating myself, hoping he'll just take in the information so we can move past it.

"So you're blowing me off so you can go to Barbie school?" he says, still in disbelief. "It's not Barbie school" I correct, rolling my eyes at him before sitting down at the table we usually hang out at during our breaks.

"Aren't they going to be dressing you up and making you all girly so you can go to tea parties and balls?" he questions, sitting across from me.

"Yes..." I say trailing off not being able to prove him wrong. "Barbie school" he says satisfied with himself, taking a bite out of the apple he had just bought for dramatic affect. "Whatever" I mutter, crossing my arms across my chest.

"So when do you start?" he asks, suddenly curious about the topic. "Matthew sent me a text with the address I'm supposed to go to for my first etiquette lesson so I guess I'll be headed there after class.

"And Matthew is...?" he questions, "My dad's assistant, I've told you this like five times already" I say rolling my eyes at him. "I'm sorry okay, there have been a lot of changes in your life and brand new characters added to the cast so it's hard to keep it all straight" he explains.

"Name one other person besides Matthew that I've told you about" I say with a raised brow, curious as to who these 'new characters' might be. "Your step dad" he says proudly, not elaborating further.

"Anyone else?" I ask, rolling my eyes at the cop out answer he gave, leaving him sitting in silence after putting little to no thought into anyone else I might've told him about.

"Do you even know his name?" I scoff, feigning irritation. "Scott? No Thomas!" he says confident in his second answer. "It's James" I say standing up and grabbing my stuff so I can walk to my next class.

"I'm sorry, you know I have shit memory" he says throwing his arm around my shoulders after catching up to me, having only been a few steps behind.

"I know" I shake my head laughing it off, "It's funny how clueless you are sometimes" I say, shrugging his arm off of me. "Hey!" he whines, a little offended.

"It's okay though, I still love you" I say waving him off as we part in different directions and blowing a kiss at him which he bats off to the side, rejecting my love.

"Later loser" he says and we head off to our respective classes.

After the lecture is finally over my professor calls me to the front. "Yes?" I question, waiting for what he has to tell me. "I read your paper last night" he starts,

"I'm sorry Professor I had some other assignments due at the same time so I wasn't able to put in as much effort as I wanted to" I confess feeling guilty about putting that assignment on the back burner.

"Well I was actually going to tell you that I was rather impressed with it" he says looking up at me from his seated position at his desk, fixing his glasses.

"Really?" I question, surprised that it was good enough for him to even single out.

"I wanted to ask if you would be interested in participating in this writing contest at the end of next month" he proposes and hands me the flyer showing all of the details.

"You really think my writing is good enough?" I question, not even having considered signing up for something like this. "I wouldn't be speaking to you about it if I didn't think it was" he says laughing at my reactions.

"This would be amazing thank you!" I say starting to skim through the details real quick. "You can take that with you if you'd like" he offers and at that I nod in thanks and say my goodbyes before walking out and heading to my car.

"Now where is this place?" I ask myself aloud, pulling up the text I got and putting the address into my gps. "45 minutes?" I groan, now slightly panicked seeing that even if I leave now I'll still be 10 minutes late.

"What the hell Matthew?" I curse and put my seatbelt on, speeding out of the parking lot and down the street, praying that I'll be able to somehow shave a few minutes off the eta to make it in time.

~~~~~

"Punctuality is one of the most important aspects of proper etiquette" I hear the man say to me with his back turned as I walk into the area of his home he has dedicated to these lessons.

"I'm very sorry I did not realize how far these lessons would be in relation to my University" I apologize hating that I've already made a bad impression which has clearly started us off on the wrong foot.

"Proper planning is also something you must consider to be able to maintain a certain sense of decorum before arriving to your intended destination" he says still with his back to me.

"I apologize again Mr. Jeon it won't happen again" I say using what I hope is the proper way he would like to be addressed.

"See that it doesn't" he says finally turning around to face me. I nod my head in acknowledgement and he gives me a sour look showing he's displeased with my response.

"One must verbally respond to properly communicate with one another" he says, placing his hands behind his back and interlocking his fingers while walking towards me and stalking around like a predator sizing up his prey.

"Understood" I respond and once he finally comes back around facing me he looks me up and down one last time before uttering another word.

"For your next lesson be sure to come in a dress or skirt that sits at the knee as well as stockings, heels of some sort and a blouse of course to pair with the skirt. If one wants to act like a lady, one must dress like a lady" he says and turns away to grab something in the corner of the room.

"Noted" I say under my breath already exasperated, "What was that?" he questions looking over his shoulder at me, sorting through a few books to bring over. "Understood Mr. Jeon" I say, trying to play along and follow his rules.

"Seeing as we need to start from the very beginnings of the art of etiquette I need you to read these books by this time next week" he says handing me five very large books weighing my arms down and requiring me to stumble back to regain my balance.

"All of them in a week? That's almost a book a day!" I say surprised by the workload I've been given after not even starting the actual lesson yet.

"I was not aware of the fact I would be required to teach you everything from the very start so let's just say we both have a lot of work to do" he says and motions towards a place I can set my purse down along with my five new headaches for this next week.

"Take a seat here please" he now motions to a chair that he has placed in the middle of the room, waiting for me to do as he says.

I walk up cautiously and take a seat, sitting on it like I normally would, knowing that he's meant to critique how I sit and change it.

"Sit up straight, roll your shoulders back" he says taking in my posture at all angles while I follow along with his orders.

"Loosen the tension in your back and shoulders" he says placing his hands on my shoulders from behind making me tense up even more from the unexpected contact.

"You've done the opposite of what I've asked you to" he says and I can hear how fed up with me he continues to be.

"You startled me, I did not realize you were going to do that" I say under my breath but loud enough for him to hear.

"One must never mumble or talk back to anyone no matter the circumstances. Especially aimed to or in front of an authority figure" he says and walks back around to face me again.

"So you see yourself as an authority figure to me?" I question, curious to see what his answer might be.

"I see myself as someone who deserves your respect and obedience" he says and tilts my chin up with his pointer finger maintaining purposeful eye contact.

"And you will treat me as such".

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angelinasnotebooks · 1 year ago

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Hate that my form of hyperfixation is consuming and not creating.

I think I've been falling in love with ideas my whole life. I see colors and concepts and characters, and I want every part of the illusion to play around my body and immerse my mind and soul. I thought growing up I would be an artist. When that mentally shattered, I moved on to thinking I would become an author. Now, however, I don't know what or who I'll be. All I know is that my brain never stops coming up with ideas.

Yet, with all these ideas comes the possibility of creation. It's what I want, isn't it? I want to create these pictures and stories and share them with the world. So, why am I motionless in my pursuit to bring my mind to life? I have a library in my head. There's a girl in there. Her favorite color is blue. She doesn't know if life is worth living. I have an art museum there too. There's a portrait of a dying renegade, and a demon alter ego desiring joy. Then there's the realm of fandoms. The endless multiverse of continuations and alternatives.

There's a lot going on inside my brain and imagination. Chemicals I do not understand and signals I cannot control. An abundance of beauty only an individual can conjure with their subjectivity. With no outlet for these thoughts and images, I find it all to be too much at times. Wings heavy on my back and flightless under the pressure. The ability to soar is there, but the weight within is burdensome.

Every day I come up with something new. Some ideas are fresh while others are another line on the loom, but that is all they are. Thoughts. Ideas. Invisible whisps, webs, and wishes. It's as if the only part of my frontal lobe that works is that of imagination and complex thinking. I attempt short stories, painting, studying, chores, school projects, craft projects and I never get them done. Planning, time management, logical reasoning, and decision-making have all taken a backseat. I can't get any of them done, so I turn to what has already been done.

I rewatch a favorite show. I read another fanfic. I click on a YouTube video and another. I scroll Tumblr. I read character analysis. I try on the clothes in my closet. I add shit to my wish list. I post photos from two months ago on my Instagram. I relate to autistic ADHD tiktokers. I pretend Pinterest will help me get my life together. I think about the MCU. I watch another comfort, crime, haunted, mythical series. I visit my AO3 bookmarks. I doom scroll whatever app I can get my eyes on. I turn thirteen again and either spiral into a depressive state or become infatuated with the Hunger Games--again.

The point is, I can't force my brain to work on the original ideas. Sitting at a desk with supplies doesn't get my hands moving. I fall numb waiting for my body and mind to comply with my intentions. So, I end up here again. Hitting a heart button to let other people know that their commentary and hard work have reached me, and I liked it.

I don’t want all my ideas and universes to end where they are. I don’t want to minimize or invalidate my existence, or the experiences of others like me, by remaining artistically stagnant. I want my mind to be a visual tangible galaxy free to be roamed and explored. I want to have my heart in my hands, and I want to give it to every single person that I can. I want these thoughts, these precious ideas out of my head and into yours, dear reader. I don't want to consume; I want to create. If I'm going to go down the rabbit hole, I want to be the rabbit. The entrance maker. Not the lost girl I am right now.

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kotemf · 7 months ago

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Date night

Foxiyo week is finally here!

A quick A/N, I created this series, They killed Palps and everything is fine, and I thought that I could tie my fills for Foxiyo week to this series as I think it goes well with the prompts. You don't have to read the series to understand this, don't worry, it's just some barely connected one shots. All you need to know is that Palpatine is dead, Riyo and Fox are dating already and they sorta accidentally adopted a clone cadet. I hope you enjoy reading!

Fox was trying to work.

Riyo seemed set on getting him to stop working.

"Could you please stop doing that?"

"Doing what?" Riyo looked at him innocently. It wasn't her practiced 'I don't know what you're talking about' face she used when convincing politicians and other influential people that she didn't manipulate them at all, no. She actually didn't realize just what she was doing to Fox just sitting on his desk.

"Sitting there like that."

"Why?"

"You're distracting me."

"Am I now?" Fox shouldn't have told her that. She just realized just how difficult it was for Fox to focus with her around and she was going to use that. Fox watched in horror as Riyo went over to him and sat on his lap.

"Riyo! There is a CCTV!" Fox hissed. He hoped no one found any reason to go through the footage in his office. It wasn't that he would get in trouble, he was a commander after all, but Thorn and Thire would never let him live that down. Fox made a point of scolding every trooper who brought their significant other to their office because that was their workspace, they were supposed to be working, not stuck staring at their partner like Fox was in the moment.

"Then take me somewhere where there isn't," Riyo challenged him. And Fox couldn't really refuse her this, could he?

"Just let me finish one report."

"One report."

Fox knew better than to even try doing anything more.

They ended up in a random park a few levels down from the Coruscant Guard headquarters. Fox used to try to take Riyo to more popular dating places, like fancy restaurants or the cinema, but somehow Riyo being a senator and making about three times more money than Fox always ruined it a bit. She always insisted on paying at least for herself in not them both. Riyo liked to talk about equality. Fox didn't really see what was equal about Riyo paying for basically everything, he would very much like to treat her to a nice date sometimes, but he knew how to pick his fights. Instead of arguing, he just suggested places that were free, like the park. It seemed to be working so far.

"This park is pretty nice. How do you know about it?"

"I passed through here a few times, patrolling or chasing after a suspect. You know, doing the usual Coruscant Guard commander stuff."

"Are you implying your job is more exciting than mine?" Riyo asked, mock offended.

"More interesting? Maybe. More dangerous? Definitely not."

"Come on, it's not me who is chasing after the worst scum of the galaxy on a daily basis."

"You've been in the senate for three years, that's not even a whole election period. You've received an insane number of threats, you've been almost kidnapped, twice, you've been shot at, five times, you've been almost stabbed-"

"So what if my job isn't the safest?"

"Don't interrupt me, I'm explaining why you're my biggest headache. Well, second biggest headache."

"Just second? Who is the first?"

"Well, senator Amidala holds the record for the most assassination attempts at the moment." Fox looked at Riyo. She looked strangely determined. Oh no... "Riyo, it's not a competition, you know that, right?"

"Yeah, sure."

"You know, maybe you should learn some self defense if you're planning on keeping pushing for unpopular opinions in the senate."

"If you teach me."

"Of course I'll teach you." It wasn't like Fox could deny Riyo anything, especially when it was something that was going to protect her. Most people assumed that he, as a guard, was the one who had a risky job. It was a risky job but so was being a senator. Fox has been working around the senate ever since he got deployed from Kamino, he was working to protect the senators. So yes, he knew how dangerous the job of a politician could be. Voicing the wrong opinion could lead to numerous assassination attempts. And while it got better after the war was over, senators could still be in danger.

"What do you say we start tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow? Sure. You will want to get Sky out of the house, though. The kid is good. He would laugh at you. Now that I think about it, where is he? Where did you ditch him for today's evening?"

"He is sleeping over at Thanh's."

Fox should've probably assumed that. Their adorable little cadet was best friends with Cody's adorable little cadet. By nat-born standards, they were cousins, by clone standards, they were brothers. It was rather complicated so they all just opted to call them friends. Thanh often visited them, he liked Riyo's huge villa that apparently came with the post of a senator. Sky in return spent a lot of time at Cody's house, because Cody being a stay at home dad while getting doing some courses on one of the many universities of Coruscant could watch the kids in the afternoon when Riyo and Fox were busy. Sky was technically old enough to stay alone at home for a few hours but Fox always felt calmer when he knew someone was watching over him.

"We should do this more often," Riyo said suddenly. "Just take a break and go out."

"Yeah, we probably should." Fox knew this. But they were both busy and most of the time they weren't working was spent with their son. Not that Fox minded, he loved their child. In fact, sometimes he was tempted to just leave work and become a full time trophy husband. Just get Sky ready for school, then watch some holos, get his nails done, cook lunch and drop it off at Riyo's office, gossip with Cody, then pick Sky up from school and tend to him for the rest of the day. That sounded pretty boring.

"What do you say we go for a dinner on the weekend? Senator Organa recommended me a good restaurant."

"I'm not sure." It wasn't that Fox didn't want it. He immediately felt guilty when he saw Riyo's soft smile falter. He rushed to explain. "I wanted to spend the weekend with Sky."

"We can still do that. This would be just one evening."

"Alright, sounds great."

"Let's enjoy our walk now, shall we?"

"Of course," Fox agreed easily. Problems will always be there, a nice, quiet night at the park won't.

#star wars #clone wars #star wars fan fiction #fan fiction #commander fox #riyo chuchi #cc 1010 #foxiyo #foxiyoweek2024 #date night #i hope this is following the prompt enough i got a little carried away

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azucarmorena97 · 1 year ago

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Money Ties (Jungkook Love Story || Pt.9)

Pt.8 || Pt.10

Your parents have worked hard to get to the top and have made sure to teach you everything you need to know to be successful in this business: from tough but lucrative financial decisions, down to the right ball gown for any given banquet. A promising and extravagant future awaits you- that is, if you agree to one teensy detail...

Son of Mr.Jeon Sr. and heir to June Company, Jeon Jungkook is an immature playboy with nothing to offer a woman but good looks and a crap ton of money, and he stands to inherit much MUCH more, so long as you both enter into the arranged marriage contract that was drawn up before the pair of you were even born.

You're more than willing to try, but you're not sure you'll be able to stand each other long enough to inherit a single penny...

Series Warnings: There will be smut in the near future and I will label those chapters as such. As I say before most of my pieces- I do not endorse any themes, ideas, or behaviors in this series. This is all purely fiction/fantasy! Feel free to inbox me suggestions/ideas/what you'd like to see in this series and I'll see what I can do! Enjoy <3

Recap: For years, you've heard people say that your first time isn't as special as the movies make it seem. They say it's something to just get done and move on from so you can start having good sex- and maybe that's true for some people, but this? You like this.

- Lisa: Kookie, where are you? I miss you <3

Your heart begins to pound in your chest. You look over at the bathroom door, still closed, though you've heard a flush.

Without another thought, you dart out of the bed, quickly yanking on your clothes, making sure to leave absolutely no trace of yourself behind in that room.

You finally hear the bathroom door open though when you do, the hotel room door is already clicking shut behind you.

You sit in front of your computer, brows furrowed in concentration as your eyes dart from one tab to the next, typing furiously. Since you've been back home, you've been working non-stop, getting everything ready for your transition from your parents' business to Jeon Company. Beside the tedious tasks to be completed before going back to Seoul, you've made it a point not to think too much about your return.

"Don't you think you should at least respond to his messages?" B/f/n says one night on facetime. "I've been responding to mine and his mother's messages, he knows I'm fine, there's nothing to talk about." "Y/n, he walks around here like a lost puppy. He tries to hide it but it's so obvious." "Tell Lisa where her dog is then." "Y/n, maybe it was a misunderstanding." "Honestly, I don't really care anymore. I've made my peace with the idea that he might end up being my husband but he will never...never be mine," The sting is present but you ignore it. "There's no way you've made any sort of peace with...any of this. What you guys did was kind of a big deal." "It...was what it was. It was gonna happen anyway, and now I'm glad we didn't wait until the wedding night so we wouldn't kid ourselves into thinking it's some sacred act." "But it was." "I've uh, gotta go," You say, having received a notification of an incoming call on your apple watch. B/f/n sighs, "Alright...talk later." "Yeah." Without another word, you hang up the call.

It's not that you mean to be mean. You can feel yourself being short with your parents, with B/f/n, but you can't bring yourself to continue answering their questions. How are you? Why haven'y you called? Did something happen between you and Jungkook? What happened? It's humiliating enough to know he fucked you without any real plans to ever get rid of his ex-girlfriend- you don't need to be telling the whole world about it. The only reason you even told B/f/n about it was because she was the one who drove you to the airport. She could immediately tell something was off and you couldn't hold it in for any longer and began crying and carrying on. You've never been one for dramatics and tears...but this one stung. No, worse... This one might have finally broken your spirit.

"I could oversee the Australia branch on this one if you want. I'm much more familiar with the market over there -" You're trying to focus on the presentation being given by a member of the marketing department, though your mind keeps teetering back and forth between the information and your personal life. Suddenly, you see a txt message notification pop up at the corner of your laptop screen. Jungkook. Your heart skips a beat, though you quickly dismiss it and turn your attention back to the front of the room, but it doesn't stop- another message, another message, another- soon you have 5 messages from him. You bite your lip, feeling anxious to know what he's saying but not wanting to give in. "Uhm, you'll have to excuse me for just a moment," You say, shooting out of your chair and abruptly walking out of the room, leaving everyone staring at you from the other side of the big glass wall as you walk down the hall.

You take your phone out and unlock it, quickly opening up to his messages.

𝗝𝘂𝗻𝗴𝗸𝗼𝗼𝗸: 𝗬/𝗻 𝗜 𝗿𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗸 𝘁𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗝𝘂𝗻𝗴𝗸𝗼𝗼𝗸: 𝗜𝗱𝗸 𝘆 𝘂𝗿 𝗮𝗻𝗴��𝘆 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗺𝗲 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗰𝗻 𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗸? 𝗝𝘂𝗻𝗴𝗸𝗼𝗼𝗸: 𝗦𝗼𝗺𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗳 𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗻, 𝗜 𝗿𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗸 𝘁𝗶 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗝𝘂𝗻𝗴𝗸𝗼𝗼𝗸: 𝗜𝘁 𝗰𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗶𝘁 𝘂𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗹 𝘆𝗼 𝗰𝗼𝗺 𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝗝𝘂𝗻𝗴𝗸𝗼𝗼𝗸: 𝗣𝗹𝘇 𝗬/𝗻

"What the fuck..." You mumble, furrowing your brows. Is he having a stroke or something? You slap your hand to your forehead and press the call button on his contact. You swore you wouldn't talk to him at all while you were back at home, yet here you are, calling him. It rings only twice and then you can hear rustling on the other side, along with loud music.

"J-Jungkook?" You say into the phone, suddenly unsure if he meant to answer it, as it takes him quite a few seconds to say anything. "Y/n? Y/n- can you hear me?" He says loudly into the phone, his tone surprised and desperate. "Yes...I can hear you."

"Y/n, why haven't you been answering me?" "Because...I needed some space." "Space? After what we did?" It isn't until now that you notice his speech is a bit slurred. "Yeah, I needed space...hey, are you drunk?" "Are you still gonna marry me?" "Answer the question, Y/n." "You first," You narrow your eyes at the wall as though he were standing right in front of you. "Alright, fine. I may have had a few beverages. But it's your fault." "Please, tell me how this is my fault?" "Because you left me. You used me and then left me." You let out a bitter laugh, "Right, I used you." "So are you gonna marry me or what?" He repeats.

"I'm hanging up." "The phone or the relationship?" "You're not even making sense, Jungkook," You know perfectly well what he means, but you don't want to have this conversation with him, knowing how absolutely inebriated he sounds. "You don't make sense," He sounds much like a child. "Good bye." You don't let him get in another word before you hang up the phone.

You don't immediately return to the meeting, deciding you need a moment to gather yourself. As angry as you are, hearing his voice was oddly comforting. You hate that.

It's the last day of your time back home and you've packed up a lot of your things that you'll be sending to Seoul. The departure is bitter... there is no more sweet left in you to give you hope for your arrival at your new home. You don't know how you're gonna do it... your mom tried to talk you into having a bridal shower but you managed to wiggle out of it, though not without compromise. "What time is the fitting on Wednesday?" You ask your mom. "1PM. I arranged for everyone to meet fifteen minutes early though," She says excitedly. By everyone, she means herself, Mrs.Jeon, and all of your bridesmaids...including Lisa. For two to three hours, you'd be forced to play nice with the person at the center of your current rage- well, one of the people at the center. You'd be marrying the other one after. Though you suppose two to three hours is better than an entire night for a bridal shower.

"Make sure you sleep on the plane, the Jeon's invited us to dinner when you get back." "Great." "Don't start, Y/n. After Friday afternoon, they'll be family. You need to start playing smart." "I'm not playing a game to begin with," You say wearily. "Now, I don't know what happened between you and Jungkook-" You prepare to argue with her and tell her to mind her business, but she cuts you off, "-BUT- you need to put it aside and make amends. You cannot start this marriage on a bad foot." "Alright..." You concede. Pointless in protesting when you're gonna go through with it anyway.

The plane ride is long, though you spend about two thirds of it sleeping and the last bit, writing a portion of a project proposal you'd be sending your dad on behalf of the marketing team. If you just keep your head down and your mind busy, maybe you'll be able to float through the next few days without a hitch.

When you land, it's only B/f/n and Namjoon who are there to receive you. Typical. Though you'd been quite dry with B/f/n since during your time away, she is like a breath of fresh air and a sight for sore eyes and you can't help the big smile that spreads across your face when you see her. Of course, never one to hold a grudge, she embraces you tightly. "Wow, three weeks away and you'd swear Y/n was coming back from war," Namjoon jokes. B/f/n doesn't let go of you, just lazily hits him on his arm and continues hugging you. "Listen to me; you are going to be strong this week, okay? Don't think about anyone but yourself. I'll be right next to you the entire step of the way." Her words bring tears to your eyes and all you can do is struggle to nod, as she is holding you quite tightly.

When you get back to the hotel room, you drop everything and leap into bed, your heart content to just lay there... "Don't get too comfortable. Dinner's in...an hour and a half," She reminds you. You groan, face down into the mattress. You lazily roll over and stare up at the ceiling, "Maybe, if I'm lucky, I'll be reincarnated as a bed bug." "You are such a weirdo." "I'm serious...and all I'll have to do is live in people's mattresses and feast and poop...if I'm lucky, some weary traveler will transport me somewhere great, and that's how i'll live my life." "Just my luck, I'll end up being the traveler," She grumbles, causing you to laugh. "That's right, you'll never be rid of me."

You practically drag your feet behind your parents and B/f/n. No part of you wants even to exist in the same vicinity as Jungkook right now, let alone eat dinner with him and his family. "You better fix your face," Your mom says over he shoulder, and though you're not able to fully see it, you know she's saying it through gritted teeth. "Ah, welcome back!" You hear Mr.Jeon's voice come from the direction just ahead, though your parents are completely blocking your view. You immediately 'fix your face', as your mom so lovingly put it, and stepped out from behind your dad to give the most fake smile of your life- though once the entire table is in view, you realize it's only his parents. No Jungkook in sight...and for some reason, your heart falls just a little bit, though you're sure your face doesn't give you away. "H-Hello, how are you both?" You give a small bow. "Oh, we're good. How was your trip? Did you get a lot done?" Mrs.Jeon asks, her smile warm and inviting. "Yes, I did. Thanks for asking." You glance at the empty chair and it seems as though she notices because then she says, "You'll have to excuse Jungkook tonight. He's at the office preparing for a presentation for Wednesday." "Oh, yes of course," You reach for your glass of water and look at B/f/n, who gives you a small smile. At least it'll be a calm dinner...

Dinner was a breeze, the conversation flowing between your parents effortlessly; you mostly sat with your eyes on your plate, your spoon pushing around the little rice you had left. You couldn't help but let your mind wander to Jungkook...

"Earth. To. Y/n," B/f/n calls in a robotic voice, waving her hand in front of your face. "Mm?" "You okay?" She asks, putting her hair up in front of the bathroom mirror. "Oh, yeah. Sorry...I guess I spaced out." "Mhm...was it in Jungkook land again?" "What? Of course not," You try to lie but you know she ain't buying it. "Don't you think it's high time you guys talk? It's been weeks." "If I don't see that boy until the wedding day, I'll be perfectly fine." "Don't let the universe hear you," She warns, rubbing her face cream between her fingers. "Fuck the universe," You say arrogantly before turning around and leaving the bathroom.

The next morning, your alarm goes off at around 6:30, eliciting a groan from you. You grab the pillow next to you and smash it against your face, not wanting to face the day. "It's tiiiiiiiiiiime," B/f/n sings at the highest possible pitch, mimicking Mariah Carrey's 'All I Want For Christmas'. "Shut up," You whine. She's usually not a morning person but as soon as your mom told her she was in charge of getting your hair and makeup done for the fitting, she insisted that you set an early alarm. Apparently, getting ready at 11AM for your 1PM fitting wasn't enough time because, as she so lovingly put it, she's "not a miracle worker".

"I don't even get why you guys are making such a big deal out of this. It's just a fitting- why do we need hair and makeup?" "You are probably the most annoying bride I've ever worked on," She rolls her eyes, patting the beauty blender lightly on your skin. "I'm the only bride you've ever worked on." "And you're already souring my experience. This is the first time you're trying on your dress- it needs to be a memorable and impactful experience." "Fine..." You cross your arms over your chest and roll your eyes, deciding it's better to give in than to keep fighting it. All you want to do is stay in bed and sulk.

The only good to come out of the fitting today is the fact that you'll be seeing all your college friends; Han Soo-Hee, Shin Se-Kyung, Jisoo, and Jung Chae-yeon. You'd not seen them in a couple years and it'll be nice to catch up. Of course, the only downside-

"Lisa!" Mrs.Jeon says cheerfully, walking ahead of you, B/f/n, and your mom into the bridal shop. Your heart starts pounding and you can feel your blood boiling instantly. "Breathe," B/f/n whispers to you. "Mrs.Jeon!" Her voice is sickeningly sweet and you can tell by the hug she gives her that she's intent on laying it on thick. "I'm so happy you accepted to be a bridesmaid on such short notice," Mrs.Jeon turns to the side and extends her hand to motion to you, "This is Y/n." "Y/n, it's so nice to formally meet you," Lisa says with a low bow. "Same to you." You're such a liar. "I'm so excited to see you in your dress- I'm sure you'll make a beautiful bride." Her comment takes you by surprise and it takes you a moment to respond. "Th-thank you," You blush. "Of course- I'm sorry, how rude of me. What's your name?" B/f/n gives a polite smile, though you knew her enough to know that it was totally fake, "I'm B/f/n. Maid of honor." "Oh that's so sweet- You're so lucky. I won't ever be able to be a maid of honor unless my best friend finally gets married. You may have met her. Rose?"

Your mind flashes back to Rose's burning rage that day when she pulled up on Jin while you were out to dinner with Jungkook. "That sounds vaguely familiar."

"Yeah, well anyway- probably never gonna happen. Her boyfriend's a raging asshole. Anyway, are we expecting anyone else?" Lisa asks.

This whole thing feels strange. She seems way different from the impression she gave that day in the bathroom at Kook's party. You expected to be met with a sour attitude and cattiness, but she seems quite...bubbly.

"Yeah, our four other bridesmaids should be here shortly," B/f/n says, checking her watch.

Not a second goes by and the bell on the bridal shop door chimes, announcing the arrival of the rest of your court. "WHERE'S THE BRIDE!?" Se-Kyung exclaims, throwing her hands up in celebration.

"MY GIRLS!" You cheer, both you and B/f/n running to hug your guests. Instantly, you feel yourself relax. It doesn't matter how this fitting goes, you finally have your people around you.

After a few minutes, you were all lead by a sales associate to a back room with various mirrors and a pretty pink couch, the walls lined with dresses upon dresses. On the furthest wall, facing the couch, is a platform with three mirror, meant for you to be able to look at yourself from all angles...the thought makes you want to gag.

You're going into this fitting basically blind, not having been shown a single stitch of your dress until this moment. The sales lady leaves you in a room with it, hung high up to keep the long train from sagging on the floor. You stare at the grand gown for some time- so long that the sales lady comes back and knocks on the door, "You okay in there?" "Just-just a moment," You say, scrambling to get your clothes off and slip into the dress, holding it up at the bodice so as not to expose your boobs before they've laced you in.

You don't dare look in the dressing room mirror- seeing yourself might just make it too real and right now, you're trying desperately to convince yourself that this is all one big dream that you're gonna wake up from. Once the dress is secured, you pick the heavy skirt up and walk out to your court, each lady waiting for you with a glass of champagne in hand. A series of claps and cheers erupt and you feel your face burn. You stand with your back to the mirror, facing everyone. Your moms eyes are welling with tears, Mrs.Jeon has her hands covering her mouth, B/f/n and all of your bridesmaid's are fawning over you. "You look absolutely gorgeous," Mrs.Jeon says. "Doesn't she? God, Jungkook won't be able to keep his eyes off you," Se-Kyung smiles ear to ear. "Or his hands!" B/f/n adds, causing you to blush even harder. Even your mom and Mrs.Jeon can't hold back a laugh at her most inappropriate comment.

"So, what do you think?" Chae-Yeon asks. "About what?" You ask. "About the dress, you goof." "Oh- it's fine," You say, looking down and smoothing out the bottom. "Just fine? Did you even look in the mirror?" B/f/n asks. You respond with a long period of silence, pursing your lips. "Turn your ass around and look in that mirror," Jisoo reprimands you. "I did!" "Liar!" "Ugh, fine." You cross your arms tightly over your chest, shut your eyes tight and turn around. You brace yourself for a few seconds before finally, slowly opening your eyes.

You'd heard about this before- this moment. The moment where you see yourself for the first time in the dress. In everyone's stories, it's the second or the third dress, maybe even the tenth- but the moment will always come where you see yourself in that dress and simultaneously, see your future unfolding in your reflection. Suddenly, your eyes begin to well too. You can no longer pretend; this is real. Mom was right, you think, the hair and makeup did make a difference.

"It's the dress," Your mom says softly, pride in her voice. Everyone erupts in cheers again, though you hardly pay it any mind- your mind is completely and totally fixed on this feeling in your chest...

You want to see Jungkook.

B/f/n helps put the dress safely in the trunk for you, leaving you standing there with Lisa, as the other girls had headed off to the restaurant to get your table and your mom and Mrs.Jeon went back to the hotel to start dealing with the preparations of the ballroom. Lisa had been quite warm and welcoming to everyone the entire fitting, and you began to question whether or not you'd imagined her conversation with Rose.

Could it have been that you misunderstood everything? You misread the situation? Did you fuck everything up by jumping to conclusions?

"Uhm- Hey Lisa, we're gonna be going out to dinner once we pull out of here...would you like to join us?" You ask, the words feeling strange as they come out of your mouth.

"Oh, that's so nice of you to ask- unfortunately I really have to go take care of some stuff at home. Rain check?" "Yes, of course. No worries...And hey, listen. Thanks again for agreeing to be part of my court." "Of course, it's not a problem at all," She opens her arms to you, a warm expression on her face as she goes in for a hug. You gladly return the gesture, though once she's pulled you in, she brings her lips really close to your ear, "Anything for Jungkoook."

Venom drips off of her every word, the air thick between you; and suddenly, it all makes sense. The uncharacteristically sweet smiles, the polite bows, the compliments...she's an actress, and this fitting was her stage. In fact, the entire Jeon family is a plot device for her performance. She doesn't want Jungkook...she wants to be adored.

This is why Jungkook doesn't believe me.

Before you're able to respond in any way, Lisa is letting you go, walking in the opposite direction toward her car.

The rest of the day is a bit of a blur; so much to take in and so little to time. Dinner, drinks at the hotel bar, and now, more drinks at a pub a few blocks away. You decide to put Lisa out of your mind and just enjoy the company of your friends: drinks upon drinks are passed around, laughter and merriment fill the air- before you know it, your insides feel warm and fuzzy and your mind more free and uninhibited. "I'm gonna call him," You say, standing from your chair, a self-righteous expression on your face as you pound your chest once. "That's the best idea you've had all night," B/f/n says. "Call him!" Se-Kyung shouts. "Call him, call him, call him!" They all pound on the table, cheeks cherry red and hair disheveled- you were the sloppiest bunch anyone ever did see.

You take your phone out of your purse and punch in his number- having grown accustomed over the past few weeks at seeing it pop up on your screen, you'd memorized the number by heart. You can faintly hear it ringing but the music in the bar is so loud that you decide to stumble your way out to the parking lot. It continues to ring a few more times before he finally picks up.

"Hello?" Jungkook's voice is groggy, like he'd been sleeping. "Where were you at dinner?" You ask, cutting to the chase. "Y/n it's...it's 1AM. Where are you?" "Fuck you," You slur. "Fuck you too," He returns the same cold tone, though he doesn't hang up. "Fuck you more!" You hang up on him, mouth hanging open in disbelief at how rude he's being. Clearly, you're drunk. You can't hold what drunk people say against them. "Asshat," You grumble, returning to your friends.

About fifteen minutes go by and everyone is absolutely zombified, with B/f/n having tapped out five minutes prior, her head resting on the table. "I'm never drinking again..." Jisoo groans. "It'll be at least...twelve hours before I can stomach another drink," Se-Kyung adds. "Y/n," A familiar voice says behind you. You turn around and realize it's Namjoon. "'Joon?" You ask incredulously, "How'd you know we were here?" He chuckles, "It's my job to know. Remember?" He walks around to B/f/n and sweeps her hair out of her face. She's sound asleep. "I'm here to take you all home." "I could've gotten a car, you didn't have to do that-" "Jungkook sent me." You blink in surprise. Jungkook? "You're kinda hot," Chae-Yeon says, staring dreamily at him. "Thanks but I'm seeing someone," He says politely, gently scooping B/f/n up into his arms. "Everyone ready?"

Thursday goes by quickly, with everyone scrambling to get everything ready for the wedding. Your mothers decided to hold the wedding at the other hotel location about thirty minutes away for a nice change of scenery. Decorations are being brought in, tables and chairs set up, tapestries are brought in and hung up all over the hall ceiling. It's all coming together quickly- a circus of workers directed by yours and Jungkook's mothers. You avoid thinking about the previous night's shenanigans, cringing at yourself for having sunk so low as to drunk dial him.

But you also can't stop thinking about the absolute lack of consideration- sending Namjoon instead of just getting you all himself? What a prick...not that you wanted to see him, but it's about common decency. Don't get someone else to do your job. Even if it is technically what Namjoon gets paid to do...

"Stop talking so much, I'm getting a headache," B/f/n says sarcastically, gently nudging you. You're snapped out of your thoughts, cheeks blushing slightly, "Sorry. Just out of it today." "I can see..." You both watch as flowers are placed inside of the tall vases at the center of each table. "Am I making a mistake?" You ask, not looking over at her. She doesn't respond for a few seconds and you begin to wonder if she even heard you. "Do you love him?" She asks. Your cheeks get hotter and hotter, embarrassed by her question. "Love? I- I barely know him..." You nervously twiddle your thumbs. It's true, you barely know him...but you can't help the way your heart flutters at the word: love. You'd never been in love before...but if you're being completely honest with yourself, you can't deny that this feeling within you is nothing like the crushes you've had in your youth. This is a heavy, sticky feeling- a painful yet exhilarating condition of the heart. Love...how could you dare to speak it out loud? "Only you can answer that," B/f/n says, referring to the initial question, "And once you do, the next question is...now that you've gotten to know him, could you see yourself going back to the way life was without him?" "B/f/n! Can you please help me with this? I can't decide if I want them to out the couple's table on the left or right side!" Mrs.Jeon calls out. "Bridesmaid duty calls," She says to you before jogging over to the far end of the ballroom to give her input.

Her question stays with you, like a heavy boulder on your shoulders. The truth is, you know you can't go back. Not now...not after all of this... You guess you have your answer.

You toss and turn all night, your dreams plagued with nightmare scenarios of how it might go during the ceremony. One moment, Jungkook is saying 'I do', and then you somehow morph into Lisa before he can kiss you. In another moment, he's completely walking away and running out of the church, holding Lisa by the hand. It feels like the night only lasts as much as the blink of an eye before B/f/n is shaking you awake, her hair disheveled and eyes barely open, "Girl are you okay?" "Wh-what?" "You were like...whimpering in your sleep- and your alarm has been going off for like five minutes." You suddenly become aware of your very loud alarm. "Sorry," You say groggily, reaching over and turning off your alarm, "Just had a rough night." "I can imagine...you're probably feeling really nervous." "Yeah..." You sit up and slouch forward, your eyes locking onto the TV that's already turned on and fixed on the news channel. You mindlessly watch as clips play, one after another- and then you see an image of the Jeons' hotel. It then switches to a reporter who says, "June Company will soon be merging with L/N Co., which will open jobs throughout the country, as well as in Australia, the United States, and Japan."

"Looks like your merger is making headlines," B/f/n says, jaw practically on the floor. Your face is completely frozen and your heart is pounding. You feel as though you may have an enormous panic attack. You obviously know that the Jeons are kind of a big deal, but you didn't realize just how important this was all going to be. "Y/n?" She sees your expression and quickly turns off the television. "Let's just get you ready, yeah? Come on." She helps you out of bed and leads you to the bathroom. You're practically catatonic for the next hour while you brush your teeth and take a quick shower.

You get your hair and makeup done at the other location, having been put up in a room that connects to the ballroom. Mirrors were brought in to aid in the court's preparation. Every few minutes, you look over at the dress that's hung up on the opposite wall from the collapsable vanity where you're sitting. You don't dare take it out of the garment bag for fear of messing it up. Your mind is still so full of thoughts, all shouting at you for individual attention. It's almost like you're on auto-pilot, the makeup artists asks you to tilt your head or suck in your cheeks, or puff out your lips and you do- though it doesn't register that you've been cooperating so well until those odd moments you look in the mirror and realize your face is almost done.

In fact, you're so out of it that you don't notice Lisa come in. Now, your bridesmaids lovingly picked out coordinated velour tracksuits; yours is black, theirs are pink. They even got one for Lisa, but apparently she didn't need it because her dress is already on and her makeup is already done. Of course, she looks beautiful; her dress fits her absolutely perfectly, the silk fabric laying beautifully on her hips, and the color compliments her skin tone so that she looks like a pretty little porcelain doll...but fuck her. "Hey, Y/n would you mind just coming out to do a run through of the walk?" Your mom asks, popping her head into the suite. You nod, standing up and dusting the setting powder off of yourself, all bridesmaids in tow, though at the last second before entering the ballroom, Lisa says, "I'll meet everyone in a few minutes, I just have to run to the restroom really quickly," to which no one responds of even gives a flying fuck about. Because again, fuck her.

You'd practiced the entrance yesterday with everyone except Jungkook who, of course, was in meetings all day as he had been all week. You're surprised he's even found time to marry you today. Right now, he and his groomsmen are all in another part of the hotel getting ready; you're only practicing with the bridesmaids. You all run through it about three times and then head back to the suite to wrap up getting ready. One by one, all your bridesmaids slip on their dresses and jewelry and head to the next room over to start recording their video diaries for when you put the wedding video together. You're the only one who has yet to put on your dress. You needed the moment to be private; a second to gather your thoughts. You close the door to the suite and then slowly walk over to the garment bag. "This is it..."

You take off your tracksuit and lay it neatly on a nearby chair, leaving yourself in only your pretty, white, lacey bra and delicate silk, white panties with a small bow at the front. B/f/n had insisted you wear them so you could feel beautiful through and through- you initially thought it was an unnecessary detail, though as she is about most things, B/f/n was absolutely right- you do feel beautiful. You gingerly pull down the zipper of the garment bag, revealing the big white gown. Just as beautiful as you remember it from the fitting. You take it off of the hanger and walk over to one of the mirrors leaned against the wall. You step into the gown and pull it up- of course, you'll need help lacing it in but you just want an intimate moment to look at yourself. You press it against your chest and look up at your reflection-

and then the blood drains from your face.

You feel your hands get stiff and ice cold, and you feel that familiar tightness in your chest.

The panic attack that could not come to fruition this morning has now returned with a vengeance, and you are doubled over, sturggling for oxygen.

Cuts. Cuts everywhere. All over the skirt of the dress. Deep, angry slashes. How did I not see them before? How did I miss them? Were they there when I got to the hotel after the fitting? No, it couldn't be- B/f/n put it in the trunk and then hung it up at our hotel room... when did this happen?

Tears stream down your face as you slump forward in the chair. It's drafty in this suite but you can't bring yourself to put the tracksuit back on, or even to move at all beyond the violent jerking of your shoulders with every sob. "Y/n, Y/n, are you okay!?" B/f/n runs over to you, having just finished her recording, "What happened!?" You can't even speak, you just point to the mound of fabric on the floor that once was your dress...that once was the dress. She picks it up off the ground and holds it up, her mouth immediately falling open in disbelief. She's just as confused as you are. "What- how even- This dress was in perfect condition when I brought it here. I checked," She says angrily, trying to rack her brain just like you had only moments ago. Your crying intensifies, a strong feeling of defeat washing over you.

"Oh, Y/n," Her face softens and she hugs you tightly. "I don't know what the hell I'm gonna do. That was the dress. That was the last shred of hope I had for this God-forsaken marriage. Now what? I have no dress, I haven't seen Jungkook once since I've been back. I have nothing left in me to give..." She lets you cry into her chest for a moment before pulling away, "Okay, we have a little less than an hour before the ceremony. Let me see what we can do." She runs out of the room and then you're alone again. Completely and utterly alone...

About fifteen minutes go by and not a single person has entered the suite. You assume they're all trying to figure out what happened and how to help. Your cries have quieted down a bit but still have not ceased. You feel broken and you're tired of fighting it.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

You're snapped out of your thoughts, head lifting up and looking toward the door, "Come in," You say, your wavering voice just loud enough to be heard from the other side. The door opens slowly, and you expect to see B/f/n or maybe your mom, but instead, Jungkook walks in, his expression soft and solemn as he closes the door behind him.

"Hey, Y/n."

A/N: Hope you all liked it! Plz comment and DM for suggestions on what you'd like to see happen next in the story; you might inspire me <3

Also, I am so honored that ppl would want me to tag them in the next part. To know anyone likes this series enough to keep up with it is so heartwarming. So, with that being said:

@ttanniett <3

#bts #jungkook #jin #namjoon #suga #bts imagine #jimin #bangtan sonyeondan #angst #jungkook x reader #seoekjin #yoongi #kim taehyung

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rowretro · 1 year ago

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𝐌𝐎𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

WARNINGS: Hardcore Drug usage, underage drinking/smoking, abuse

✧taglist✧: (Idk if there is anyone who asked, but Im starting to confuse every taglist on each series)

✧CHAPTER 4✧

“Are you seriously high this early in the morning? The first lesson hasn’t even started yet fucksake y/n… Riki can’t race tonight because of your junkie ass.” Heeseung complained as the girl rolled her eyes. “Im sober when i'm high or drunk broski, not my fault he’s weak” y/n added as Heeseung facepalmed. The male had walked in on his high sister, snuggled up with a high Riki who had a race scheduled for this very day, beside them a broken, burnt out guitar that had homework stuffed in. She’s one hell of a bad influence on him.

The male wasn’t racing due to his recent high, he couldn’t take the risk of going on the track, speeding and seeing stars before he even got to the juicy part of his young age. He was too young to die. He hated it. God he’d never even look in the direction of coke ever again… So he called her up to smoke some weed after school. “Why did he even do that shit he’s never even done it before…” Heeseung mumbled as y/n frowned, turning to him “That was his first time?” the girl asked, now feeling bad for even agreeing to do coke with him.

“Yeah, guess he wanted to try and since you're a junkie who knows literally every dealer to even breath in South Korea” Hee added as the girl rolled her eyes “he does weed though right?” She asked as Hee frowned “Yeah, anyone could get weed if you think about it, anyways point is, let him influence you, stop influencing him, if you deal any hardcore drugs with anyone, dad will happily give you his position as a drug lord.” Hee pointed out as the girl turned to him, glaring holes into his head, the poor girl failed to notice the obviously closed door before her as she walked into it, hitting her head pretty hard.

“AHH FUCKING FICKLE HEAD- ” She groaned as she sat on the floor "every goddamn time" Hee snickered. Heeseung sat beside her, the two sitting on the freshly mopped school grounds, by the tall lockers. They had arrived early to school since Heeseung was dropping her off. "You know... Riki used to race illegally... and well some one who had connections to a more legal company saw him and his skills which is how he's so famous now." Heeseung pointed out as he turned to her.

y/n sighed as she took a sip of some cold, refreshing gin out of her flask, as she turned to Heeseung "It's not going to happen Heeseung... racing is just a princess dream." Y/n simply said as Heeseung sighed. If it was anyone other than Heeseung Jungwon or Sunoo who dare to even bring up racing with her, that person oughta go home with a rearranged face. It seems Riki was lucky.

It's funny how something someone loves so dearly and always dreamed of having some day, could turn into something they dread so much, they don't want to even hear anything of it. To y/n racing was her first love, her bittersweet lover who left her with a fresh wound that can never be treated. Maybe she stuff a human in that car shaped hole in her heart.

Heeseung patted her head as he got up "The offers always up if you're down to make your dreams come true." Heeseung said as the girl scoffed "I don't have dreams... dreams are for losers" she remarked. "Well, I know a little 7 year old who always annoys me with her dream plans to be a racer in her flaming pink race car with a nice disco ball inside... I'm sure you wouldn't mind making her dreams come true" Heeseung added with a smile, seeing that she didn't spit any snarky comebacks at him.

"Even if she's being a stubborn, annoying and showing me a little attitude, she's still my baby sister... I'd hate for her dreams to disappear like that" Heeseung simply said before leaving the girl with her own thoughts. It's true, her whole childhood, she always wanted to be a racer. She never actually watched any racing programmes, just the fast and furious movies, her favourite being 2 fast 2 furious. Perhaps why the specific pink colour of car

✧𝐌𝐎𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓✧

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tillthelandslide · 2 years ago

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Insufferable Arsehole (When In Rome) Part 10 - Step Into Your Skin

An: so I know it's a long time in the waiting but here's the new chapter of Insufferable Arsehole... Taking a little break seriously brought my love back for this series, thank you to everyone who continually supports me, I love you. This next part of the series is titled "When In Rome" hope you enjoy - Lou

Warnings: smut, fluff, mentions of tattoos. Bit long? 🤣

Series Masterlist

Previous part

Rome is heaven, everything about it from the heat, the sun, the views, the vibe, is perfect. Matty had planned the whole thing, Lou going with the flow and following the man she loved. He had managed to book their villa for a week and a half, both wanting to go home at some point and see their families.

Matty was watching Lou from the kitchen window, she was lying by the pool on a sun lounger, clad in a skimpy black bikini that left hardly anything to the imagination. But he didn't need to imagine, not when he had her right there, officially his girlfriend and more than willing to do anything he wanted.

Sunglasses rested over her eyes, and he watched intently as water droplets glistened on her skin in the sun, skin which had darkened far quicker than his. Skin which was already loitered with purple bruises after being attacked by his desperate and aching mouth.

His eyes wandered over her tattoos, landing on the box tattoo above her wrist, directly opposite his own. He didn't notice the huge grin resting on his face as he looked at her, but he was the perfect picture of a man in love. He felt his heart fluttering as he looked at her, he felt like he was flying, no, he was soaring, swept up in everything that was her and he never ever wanted to step back onto the ground, not when soaring felt this good.

Condensation on the glass of the iced coffee he had made her, dripped against his hand, stirring him from his daydream. His feet carry himself to her, leaving the confines of the kitchen, which backed onto the garden which was huge and had a beautiful infinity pool. He immediately feels the heat flush against his body, his bare chest which had just cooled down beginning to form a sheen. His shadow casts over her body as he stands above her.

She removes her sunglasses, smiling up at the man as he offers her the coffee with a smile.

"Thank you my love" she says, sitting up to take a sip, practically moaning as the coffee hits her tongue, the ice cooling her down almost instantly.

Her hand finds his as he still stands, staring down at her, mouth agape slightly. Her now cold mouth places a soft kiss over his knuckles, silently thanking him again.

"Jesus Christ I need to go for a swim to cool off" he says, not referring to being hot because of the weather. She giggles up at him, knowing the effect she had on him, and it's only worsened when she takes her bottom lip in-between her teeth, making the man grunt. His hand grasps her chin gently, thumb plucking her lip from her teeth, calling off the attack before he speaks.

"You're killing me here love" he says and she shrugs at him.

"I'm not doing anything" she says innocently. He chuckles at that, jumping into the pool. She giggles as he hits the water, causing a big splash, the water covering the deck and attacking her too. Little did he know she was suffering too, watching the way his tanned chest glistened in the sun, tempting her to run her palms over the muscle.

She laughs at him as he emerges, curls now soaked and sitting flat against his head as he flicks them back.

"What did I do?" She asks, her hands held to her chest in an attempt to shield herself from getting soaked.

"Nothing. Just being you love and it's killing me" he says, swimming over to the edge of the pool, she stands from her seat, coffee left by the lounger. She lowers herself so she's sat at the edge of the pool by the time he swims to the edge. Her legs part to accommodate him as he rests his arms on her thighs, her hands coming to play with his wet hair.

"Think that's the sweetest thing you've ever said" she murmurs, pressing her lips to the top of his wet head as his arms wrap around her waist, dampening the skin. His hair now smelt faintly like chlorine but she could still smell his clear and inviting scent.

"I love you" he mumbles into her skin, cheek flat against her stomach, before it's moving again so he's lips can peck at the skin.

"I love you too" she says, pressing lightly against his chin so he's looking at her.

"You might as well not be wearing this though love" he says, pulling the fabric of her bikini bottoms before letting them go so they snap against her hip.

"Hmm... Take it off then" she says to tease him on purpose.

"Fucking hell" he groans at her words, head snapping backwards as she laughs loudly. His palms are flat either side of her thighs then, pushing against the surface until he rises slightly, arms flexing as he presses his lips to hers. It's a loving kiss, not rushed despite her words which tempted him.

"It suits you being here.... By the pool, or reading in the garden... Just sitting there looking pretty" he says as he lowers himself again.

"Yeah? Like doing everything for me?" she laughs at her words but he's nodding below her, hooking his arms around her.

"Id do anything for you" he says and although he's words are intense, she knows them to be true.

"I would for you too Matty. Absolutely anything"

"Yeah?" She nods "how about we go inside and get you out of whatever this is?" He asks, hooking his finger into the side of her bikini bottoms, letting it slap back to her hip again. She nods hastily, jumping up from the pool and running inside, giggling as the curly haired man chased after her, dripping in his wake.

----------------------------------------------------------

She was covered up in a shirt of his now, the buttons undone as she sat with her guitar in her lap.

Matty was in the kitchen, being domestic and cooking them dinner. She could hear him humming along to something, she laughed when she heard a clatter or heard him swear, usually having to call out an "I'm alright don't worry!"

"Matty come here a second please" she shouts out, hearing his bare feet hit against the tiles not a moment later.

"You alright my love?" He asks, cooking utensil in hand. She nods at him and he places a peck to her mouth.

"Will you listen to this a second? Tell me what you think?" She asks and he nods, placing himself down on the sofa opposite to where she's sat.

He hears her begin to play a familiar melody: the one she began writing when he saw her on the stage before that show.

When I was younger, I saw my daddy cry

And curse at the wind

He broke his own heart and I watched

As he tried to reassemble it

And my momma swore

That she would never let herself forget

And that was the day that I promised

I'd never sing of love if it does not exist

His heart aches at the words, desperately wanting to just take away the guitar and hug her, to let her know she had him now and love, it really did exist. Theirs was strong and he truly believed it could conquer all. He never really felt like that before, love before her was something that occupied his time, made life a little less shit and a little more bearable. But with her, her love, it was everything, it was the air he needed to breathe, the music to his ears, the blood pumping in his veins.

But darling, you are the only exception

You are the only exception

Her eyes find his and if he wasn't just a bit too realistic he would've thought time slowed. She was singing about him.

Maybe I know somewhere deep in my soul

That love never lasts

And we've got to find other ways to make it alone

Or keep a straight face

And I've always lived like this

Keeping a comfortable distance

And up until now I had sworn to myself

That I'm content with loneliness

Because none of it was ever worth the risk

Matty feels his heart yearn for her. The words she sung were beautiful, and they told him everything he had always wanted to know. About her parents (very briefly and he still wanted to know more) about how love was for her before him.

But you are the only exception

You are the only exception

I've got a tight grip on reality

But I can't let go of what's in front of me here

I know you're leaving in the morning when you wake up

Leave me with some kind of proof it's not a dream

Her voice picks up and he notices how for the first time, her eyes flutter close. He sees a single tear fall from the corner of her eye and his breath wavers and he feels a lump in his throat, especially when her eyes reopen and peer into his. He can see how she's bearing her soul to him, he sees it and he knows it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen.

You are the only exception

And I'm on my way to believing

Oh, and I'm on my way to believing

She sang the song he had heard before, but she sang it completely now. He finds himself with tears in his eyes and she's quick to place the guitar down, pulling him into her and cradling his body in her arms. He didn't need to ask, he knew it written for him and somehow he realises just how much she loved him. He had never been loved this hard before, this fiercely, and he had a feeling she hadn't either.

His voice is quiet when he finally speaks, not whispering but hushed.

"Love..." His voice trails off, not knowing what to say.

"You don't have to say anything... Just tell me if it's bad" she says but she knows by his reaction that it's not.

"Lou it's a beautiful song" he murmurs, looking at her now as he cradles her face gently.

"Scared it's a bit too personal to share..." She says, voicing her worries to the man she loved.

"I think it's truly beautiful and people will love it" he says, smiling widely now.

"Yeah I'm sure you'll love that a song about you is out there... And a love song at that" she says, both confirming that the song was indeed about him but also insinuating that she's written about him before.

"Does do something to my ego love can't deny that" he jokes, the both of them lightening the mood.

He wants to ask her about her parents, about the love that she's experienced in her life, but she reminds him that the food is left unattended and he reminds himself to ask another time. She joins him in the kitchen, to help when needed but to mainly watch as he cooked.

The way his arms flexed as he stirred the food in the pot has a sighing happily. A cooking apron rested around his bare neck, it was too hot to wear a shirt so he was just adorning a pair of swimming shorts and the apron.

"You look awfully domestic matty" she says, making him turn to look at her.

"Yeah? Like it?" He asks as he returns to the task at hand.

"Love it" she confirms making him smile. He lowers the heat of the food so it simmers as he walks over to where she's sat, stepping between her legs as she wraps her arms tightly around his waist.

"I love you" he says, making her smile, leaning up to meet him half way in a sweet kiss.

"Try this" he says, returning to the food, turning it off before bringing a spoonful to her mouth. He watches as she blows gently on it to cool it down, before he slides the spoon into her mouth. He groans as she moans upon tasting it, the act isnt supposed to be sexual but god it was. The spoon finds it's way out of her mouth and his mouth falls open slightly as she licks her lips.

"Jesus Christ Matty. That's heavenly" she says, surprised at his cooking skills. He doesn't say anything and she frowns up at him, asking him what's wrong.

"You're going to be the death of me, fuck the food come here" he says, throwing the spoon the side with a clatter before pulling her up from the chair and throwing her over his shoulder. Again she's surprised by his strength and all she can do is giggle as he carries them up the stairs.

--------------------------------------------------------

"My mum and dad loved each other loads, but my dad had his own struggles and he didn't really deal with them when he was with my mum... he didn't ever let her see him in a vulnerable way" Lou explains, lying on her side next to Matty, who was listening intently to every word she said. He had finally asked her about her parents and the love she grew up around.

"My mum got to the point where she couldn't live with him when he was like that... She realised she couldn't fix him... He had to do that himself" she explained.

"Eventually my dad got better, opening himself up to me, allowed me to see him in that way... And then he met Mia's mum and they had mia... And my mum found her partner..." She explains and Matty nods.

"How did it impact you though?" He asked, knowing there was more to he told.

"It kinda fucked me up... Wasn't their fault though... I seemed to always get into relationships with guys who were emotionally unavailable... Ones who got me to fall for them and then kept me at arms length... After a few times I just began keeping myself at a distance... The only love I really knew, before you to be honest, was always unrequited" she finally explains, confirming Matty's theory.

"Every single one of them were absolute fools for not loving you... You're the best thing that's ever happened to me" Matty says, pressing a soft kiss to her mouth, pulling her closer to him, his back flush against the bed as she rested on top of him.

"I love you" she murmurs against his mouth.

"Thank you for telling me all that" he says and she smiles at him.

"I want you to know everything"

"I want to know everything... And want you to know everything about me too" he says, his words making her smile widely because that's all she's ever wanted, to know him, fully know him. Years worth of horrible relationships with guys she didn't really want, were all made worth while, because now she was with her person, the person she was always supposed to be with.

"You were made for me, you're my person" he says softly and she nods at him.

"You're my person" she says, kissing him again, the both of them smiling at each other. Matty gently presses against her shoulders until she's against the bed, he repositions himself so he's hovering over her, holding himself up as his eyes wander over her. She usually would feel vulnerable like this, him watching her as she laid there, not a single item of clothing covering her. She felt completely bare, physically and metaphorically, but she didn't feel vulnerable, she couldn't, not with the way he looked at her like she was his entire world.

"You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen" he says, the most beautiful thing, thing. Because she was more beautiful than any person he had ever laid eyes on, more beautiful than any flower, sunset, sunrise, more beautiful than any painting could even attempt to capture.

"I'm never going to love someone as much as I love you" he admits, her heart fluttering at his words. She feels his words in every part of her, she feels the effect he has on her brain, clouding every corner of it, painting it with beautiful shades of him. She feels the way he fills her heart, filling it so much it almost hurts, it hurts when she's without him, but luckily he filled it enough that he was still there, even when he wasn't. She feels the way he makes her hairs stand on end, her senses heightened, she feels the way every word he says has her core fluttering, longing for that sweet release only he was able to grant her.

She feels the way her pupils dilate when she sees him, vision narrowing, he defined the phrase "tunnel vision" because no one even existed when he was in the room. Every single part of her longed for him, never wanting to be without him, knowing that the thought of being without him, would destroy her, so she simply pushed it away, not even needing to think about it, because it simply wouldn't happen.

"Good" she says leaning up to place her lips to his, the man trying with all his willpower not to lower himself onto her.

"Because I don't plan on ever being without you" she says as he pulls away from him, him chasing her mouth with his own, enveloping his tongue with hers.

----------------------------------------------------------

They stand at the foot of a tiny shop, wedged in-between a rustic looking bar and a coffee shop. The tattoo sign hung above the frame, slanted, the lights flickering occasionally. The shop was situated about 2 minutes away from their villa and Matty saw it on the first day of their trip, insisting they had to get tattoos.

Matty's eyes are covered in a pair of Truman, black-ish glasses, he wears a pair of black denim shorts and white (and slightly sheer) white shirt, the sleeves of which are rolled up. She was wearing a white milkmaid-like summer dress, which was quite short and revealed the skin of her tanned legs and chest, her collarbones shining, tempting his eyes to look at the swell of her breasts picking out of the fabric. She thought he looked fit, he thought she looked ravishing

"Matty... This looks dodgy as fuck" she says making him laugh, eyes flicking from the sign to the man squeezing her hand. She watches as his cheeks stretch into a smile, his arm hooking around her shoulders, pulling her into him, pressing his lips against the side of her head.

"Come on love, gotta live life on the edge" he says, the words mumbled into her skin.

"If I get some infection because of you...." Her words trail off, her threat cut short.

"You'll be fine come on" he says pulling them into the shop. The bell above the door rings and an oldish looking man comes to greet them, a tanned man with black and grey hair greets them with a smile.

"What a beautiful couple!" He exclaims and the two smile. The man pauses, looking at Matty as he takes his glasses off, for a moment they think he's going to recognise them but the man laughs.

"You look like a rockstar!" Is all he says and it makes Lou chuckle.

"What can I do for you?" He asks and Matty's eyes find Lou's.

"I know what I want but I don't want you to see yet" Lou nods and Matty smiles.

"I'll get my son to come to you" the man says, his accent thick. He shouts in Italian, and seconds later a tanned man with black hair similar to his enters the room.

"This beautiful lady wants a tattoo" he says and the man comes towards her, smiling at her. He's arms are covered in tattoos and his eyes are piercingly blue. He's attractive, not that Lou even notices because she's too busy staring at her boyfriend who's talking to the man and being led away.

"What can I do for you?" The man asks and she proceeds telling him what she'd like.

The man applies the transfer onto her skin, complimenting her other tattoos as he does. His hand touches the box tattoo, complimenting the artwork.

"What's it for?" He asks and she smiles.

"It's for a band" she says simply, smiling at it.

"A logo?" She nods.

"You in the band?" He asks, accent thick.

"Yeah... Yeah I'm in the band" she smiles, a huge smile that makes the man smile too.

"That man had the same yes?" He asks and she nods again. He begins tattooing her.

"Your boyfriend?" He asks again, eyes momentarily flicking up to hers before focusing back on the gun, hands moving with precision.

"Yeah..." She says, the smile unwavering from her face.

"A lucky man" he says and she hears Matty speak from behind her, making her turn her head.

"I am indeed" he says as he bends down, their lips meet in a kiss

"That was quick, let me see" she says as the man continues, she's so used to the feeling now having had so many done, she's completely uphased.

"Later" he says, hiding his hand, she raises her eyebrows but let's it go.

"What are you getting?" He asks and she shakes her head.

"It's a surprise don't look" Matty turns his head at that, instead looking into her eyes instead of her arm where the ink is being applied.

"You truly are a beautiful couple" the younger man says and they both smile again.

"Thank you" Lou says and Matty nods, agreeing to the sentiment.

The man continues his work for a few more minutes, wrapping the tattoo. The couple both pay, thanking the two men before leaving the store.

They walk back to their villa, Matty holding her to his side. When they get back he's immediately asking to see the tattoo. She smiles as she takes the wraps off revealing it to him.

He sees two dates itched into her arm and instantly smiles at the sight, tears appearing in his eyes.

One date was the first date they joined them on tour "the day that changed my life" she says, earning her a kiss from the man. He looks down at the other date "the day I asked you to be my girlfriend?" He asks, she nods. They kiss again before they're hugging each other tightly.

"Fuck I love you" she's begging to see his now and he reveals his left hand, removing the tiny bit of cling film that wraps around his ring finger. She feels tears spring to her eyes now when she sees her initial itched into the skin.

"Matty..." She's full on sobbing now, and he pulls her into his embrace, their mouths attach. He forces them to pull apart, needing to say what he needed.

"I've got you in my life now and I'm never letting you go. You've got me forever and I know we haven't had many discussions about what we want in life... Maybe we won't get married or have kids... But I know I want you, forever" he says and she continues to cry at his words.

"Matty that means so much to me" she looks at the letter again, resting nicely against his ring finger.

"Do hope to make you my wife though" he says "wouldn't have got it there if not" they laugh then, lips pressing against each other quickly.

"Yeah?" She asks and he nods, sealing his words with a kiss.

"And one day maybe I'll fill that belly with babies" he says, hands resting over her stomach which warms with desire for him.

"Yeah?" She asks again, eyes coming to find his, darkening as they look at him, lip in-between his teeth.

He nods and she smirks "we could practice that bit" he laughs at this and pulls her into him.

"Kinda wanna be buried in-between those beautiful thighs of yours, will you let me do that love?" He asks and she's nodding eagerly up at him, mouth taken up by his not a second later.

It takes him no time at all to have her spread for him on the bed of their holiday home. He's buried in-between her thighs, glorious tongue lapping her up, her hand laced in his curls, tugging at the strands. He groans into her pussy, making her back arch. She holds the dress she was wearing around her waist so she could see him.

"oh fuck Matty" he loves the way his name falls easily from her lips. He smirks and nips at her clit, making her wince "Matthew" she warns.

"Sorry love" he smirks at the way she calls him Matthew again and delivers a calculated swipe over her clit as an apology.

"You're so good" she truly means it, head before him was mediocre at best but he... He has her seeing stars as soon as he gets his mouth on her.

"Taste so good love" he says, truly a starved man, searching for gold and by god does he find it. The way she's clenching around his tongue lets him know she needs more so two fingers find their way into her sopping cunt, instantly curling and hitting her gspot.

"fuck I'm going to cum Matty" her back arches impossibly more, almost giving her whiplash.

"cum for me darling' he says, latching onto her clit and sucking harshly as his fingers relentlessly curl into her. Her juices coat his chin as the wave breaks, pleasure coursing through her body until she's spasming, thighs closing round his head. She pushes his face into her cunt, unaware she's doing so but he moans into her, loving how harsh she was being.

"fuck" he moans into her, euphoria clouding all her senses. Her hands are gripping his hair tightly and slowly her grip loosening, on both his hair and her dress. Her thighs open as the fabric falls around his face.

"that was fucking hot' he says as he comes up to meet her lips with his. She tastes herself on his tongue as she sighs, still coming down from her high. She's quick to undo the zip of his shorts, pushing the denim down his legs, taking his boxers with it.

She grabs his hard member, delivering a few strokes, making him moan loudly, lips peeling off hers.

"fuck" he says as he looks down to watch her manicured hands stroke him, thumbing at the tip until his hips are thrusting into her hand.

"off, off off" she says as he other hand pushes against the fabric of his shirt. The man leans back, her hand still clasped around him as he shrugs his shirt off. He comes back to her, forehead resting against hers again as he watched himself disappear into her hand.

"Fucking hell" he says, mind snapping back to when he was a teenager, in a similar position to this, expect it was his own hand wrapped around himself as he thought about her.

"Really need to make love to you now" he says and his eyes find her darkened ones.

"yes please" she says and he smiles down her, groping her chin and thumbing at her lips. Despite his words he doesn't rush his movements, his eyes wander down her body, tugging at the fabric around her waist until her tits are spilling out of it, his mouth immediately wrapping around the peaked bud. She gasps and her hand falters around him, Matty slowly thrusts into her hand, wanting the pleasure but not wanting to spill over the edge.

"Fuck you're so perfect. My beautiful fucking angel" he says as his mouth attacks her nipples. His hand drifts back down to her legs, his fingers teasing her once more.

"Can't believe you went all day without wearing anything under this dress.... Just waiting and ready for me to fuck you yeah?" He asks, dark eyes finding hers.

"Always ready for you" she says, attempting to pull him forwards and into her but the man stops her.

"Please Matty... Please fuck me" she begs and that's enough for him so he slowly threads the head of him into her wet hole, the two of them sighing out in harmony.

"oh god you're so perfect. My perfect fucking girl. So good to me" he spews, forehead falling against hers as he watches her take him, until his pelvis is flush against hers. He grinds against her, holding myself close to her, letting her adjust.

"Move please" she says, and Matty is snapping forwards into her then, his thrusts deep and slow, hips moving attentively.

"Oh god" she moans, back arching off the bed just to be closer to him. His hands clamp around her waist, holding her to him.

"Not god love... Just me" he says, or should I say moans. She laughs but the noise is quickly replaced by a moan when he hits her gspot. He feels the way she flutters around him, clamping around him, nearly milking him for what his worth, causing his hips to stutter momentarily before he's continuing his purposeful movements.

"That the spot love?" He asks and she nods rigorously, pulling yet pushing him all at once.

"Need more love?" He asks, knowing her body like the back of his hand. She nods again, and he grunts as she clenches around him again.

"Flip" he commands, his tone changing slightly. She does as she's told and is quickly resting on her stomach. Matty grabs a pillow and places it under her hips before he's pulling her backside up by her hips.

A scream tares through her as he thrusts back into her. The angle forces him to hit her gspot with every thrust, the woman beneath him moaning into the pillow.

"Don't hold back on my account love" he says, his hands gripping her hips harshly now, the sting against her skin blissful. There's a cockiness to his words but she truly doesn't care, she's grown to love him when he's like this, and she knows one way which will have him losing his mind: by stroking that ego of his.

"Matty" she moans, although it's muffled against the pillow.

"Let me hear you love. let everyone know who's fucking you" he says, hips moving fast and hard into her, his skin slapping against hers. Her head tilts backwards and he sees tears of pleasure coating her cheeks.

"You're made for me Matty" she says. He watches as the words tumble from her mouth, her glazed eyes daring to flutter close but they stay open, trained on him. Her words have his movements faltering for a split second before he's relentlessly pushing and pulling from her.

"fuck.. you're beautiful. So fucking perfect - fuckkkk" he says, grunting as she begins pushing back into him, the push and pull of their movements intensifying their pleasure. She gasps out in pleasure, fluttering around him, eyes snapping shut as her back arches, clear signs that she was close.

"Come here, need you close" he admits, tugging her upwards until her back is flush with his chest.

"So perfect" he says, smearing his lips against her back.

"Fuck you're so good Matty" she says, feeling his cock twitch inside her, his ego clearly enjoying the compliment.

"Yeah? Tell me how good" he says and she goes to speak but he pulls out, easily maneuvering her body until she's on her back again, he thrusts back in before she even has time to miss him.

"No one fucks me like you Matty" she admits, "I'm going to cum, you're going to make me cum" she says, grasping his face in her hands, lips smearing against his. You're going to make me cum, those wo words almost kill him, but he couldn't think of a better way to go, buried in the girl he loves, the one girl he's always loved, the love of his life.

"Come with me Matty" she says, voice airy and ethereal.

"Oh fuck" he says, his body giving in at her words, hips stuttering forward as he cums inside her, her core squeezing around him as she cums too.

"I fucking love you" he says, laughing as he fills inside her, so content and happy with her.

"I love you Matty. So much" she says.

Note: I know it's long sorry.... Hope you enjoy though. Love you - Lou 🫶🏽

#the 1975 #the 1975 fanfic #matty healy #matty healy x reader #matty healy fan fic #matty healy fanfiction #matty healy smut #matty the 1975 #matty healy fic #matty healy fluff #matty healy imagine #matty healy fanfic #insufferable arsehole matty healy series #the 1975 smut #matthew timothy healy #matthew healy #matty healy series

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jessjad · 1 year ago

Text

Unexpected

Chapter 8

Summary: After a Halloweenparty Y/N actually didn't want to got to, her life seems to be turned around. The reason is a very stubborn Supe that seems to have her in his visier. Is it just a coincidance or more?

Pairing: Soldier Boy/Ben x Reader

Word Count: 2590

Warnings: some language, character death (mentioned), graphic violence and a little hurt/comfort (as best as possible)

A/N: Aaand we're back. This is going to be a little emotional. Do we all remember Y/N's sister Jenny? Yeah, we're going there. Buckle up, guys... All mistakes are mine.

My Masterlist Series Masterlist

The tension was high. In the last couple of days the world seemed to be upside down. No matter what channel Y/N decided to watch, Homelander was all over the place. The horrific pictures of his son Ryan killing the poor boy on the other side of the street were still shown. Wheter it was anchormen or so called experts in superhero topics who discussed the situation over and over again, kept it alive. All of a sudden Soldier Boy was not the most important thing to talk about anymore.

After this, Annie has gotten way more followers. Anti-fans of supes, as they started to call themselves now, made their own videos of supes and what was so wrong about them. Some of them even catching a glimpse of misbehavement and recklesness. The danger that came with this kind of research willingly forgotten.

Homelanders followers on the other hand were still on the side of Vaught and all the other supes. Calling the straight up murders little accidents and just collatteral damage. Nothing to worry about. It had Y/N's stomache churning with disgust and disbelief. But not just her. Ben seemed to be more stressed too. He also stopped venturing out as much as before. He did not say it, but Y/N could see it in his face. The worry behind his stoic eyes and the small crease on his forehead that showed his tables turning in his mind.

Mallory had contacted both of them more than once after the live broadcast and was pressing changes in their plan. Not even now, after all these weeks, Y/N still didn't know any more details about THE plan and what they were trying to do and how they wanted to stop Homelander. It was kinda frustating to be left in the dark, to feel like a puppet on strings. On the other hand though, she was a little glad not to know everything.

"I was really worried there for a second, girl! Seeing you falling into the ice cold Hudson River..." said Caroline and brought Y/N's attention back to her. "I mean, you know that I never really cared about Vaught and the supes... But after everything I saw on the TV..."

Her gaze traveled to the screen on the wall on which the news showed the incident with Homelander again and discussed what would be happening next. Ben was sitting on the couch, deep in thought.

"Yeah... It's not the first time that happend. It's only the first time, that the whole world is seeing this."

"And..." Care was getting a little closer to Y/N and started to lower her voice. "... I did some research online about... Ben." She pointed with her head to the man on the couch.

"Don't... say it."

"But... he is one of them. The original one, I believe. And he is no different than Homelander." the woman said.

"I'm nothing like the flag licking dick sucker." Ben interrupted from the living room with a short glanze to the kitchen table. "And I can hear you."

Y/N smiled a little. "Anyway... this whole situation... is a mess and I had my problems with it too in the beginning. Care, trust me..."

And to make it clear to her friend she told her as much as she could about it all without giving to much away. Her best friend gasped a couple of times and couldn't hold back on the dirty jokes, when the story came to certain points. Y/N had to laugh a little and the realization hid her that it felt good to finally talk to someone about it. She was pretty isolated in her own apartment.

Of course she had Annie or Hughie to talk to, but that was not the same. Only the supe who shared the apartment with her was 24/7 around her, but he was not the biggest talker. Although it seemed as if he was trying to open up a little more to her.

"... and now we... we came to terms. And it's fine. For now."

"Okay." Caroline nodded her head. "I trust you if you say so."

Y/N nodded too and laid her hand on top of her friends.

"But, Care... it would've been better if you didn't have come here. There is a reason why I went into hiding."

"I know, I know. I get that." Caroline agreed. "But I needed to know that you were okay." That really touched her heart. "But it was not just me, Y/N. I talked to your mom and she is worried, too."

"Yeah, I know that." Y/N sighed. "But it would be to risky if I kept in touch with her. Not just for me, but for my family too."

Caroline nodded in agreement. She totally got that, now that she knew what had happenend. And she assured Y/N that this was the only time she would come looking for her. The silence that followed was comfrotable. But then...

"Y/N, your mom... told me about Jenny..."

"What are we supposed to do now?"

In a dark, small corner somewhere in the abandent building outside of New York that served as Victoria Neuman's operation center were two men standing and hiding from unwanted eyes, whispering to eachother.

"We have to keep going." Johnson answered. "We know now where he is hding out and what his plan is. We only have to give him as much time as we can."

"But... with Homelander involved now? It is not that easy anymore. We can not fool them forever."

"I know, Harlow!" Johnson said with a little bit mor force, but dialed back to whispering. "But we owe Soldier Boy, you know that. Better than me. That's the only reason I took this job."

"Yeah, yeah, I get it." Harlow sighed and crossed his arms infront of his chest. "But we have to be careful. And we can trust noone, except us."

Johnson nodded and a moment of silence followed, before Harlow spoke up again. "All of this is going to bite us in the ass. I can fucking feel it in my bones."

"Don't worry, my friend. It will all play out in the end." Johnson smiled a little and gave Harlow a assuring clap on the shoulder before both men parted ways to get back to their duties.

But noone of them noticed the third person near them in the shadows.

Shortly after Caroline left, Y/N started to cook. She needed to do something with her hands, keeping herself busy. That her mom had told Care about Jenny was unexpected, but in a way she understood why she did that. They were branded by what had happened a long time ago. But she didn't wanna talk about it and her best friend didn't force her do to so. She just wanted to let her know, that she knew and was there for her if needed.

Thirty minutes later, the pasta sauce was cooking and she started to boil water, Y/N heared noises from behind her. She glanzed at the couch and saw Ben laying sprawled out and sleeping. But his brows were creased and his fists were balled. His upper lip shivered almost aggressivly. Y/N went slowly over to the man, as he started growl and grumple, before he began to shout and squirm.

"Ben?" she tried carefully and touched his shoulder with a soft hand. "Ben!"

He catched her wrist almost painfully, as he suddenly sat up, shocked out of his nightmare. His green eyes darted wildly through the room to fight of the pictures in his head.

"Ouch! Ben!" she exclaimed. "You're hurting me!"

That brought his attention back to her and fighted off the pictures of his torturous years with the commies. He released her wrist right away and got up. Turning his back to her, he wiped his face with his hand and he cleared his throat.

Y/N could already see the bruise on her wrist form. This was not the first time she experienced Ben's nightmares. They didn't happened often, but she assumed that his PTSD was fighting his way back up to the surface, now that he did not take the hard drugs anymore.

"I didn't... want to..." was all he said, without looking at her.

"I know. Don't worry about it."

Y/N really didn't mind. He didn't do it on purpose and with all the other bruises on her body from their mattress sports it was just another mark he gave her. And she just knew how much he liked to mark her up. But she could still sense that he felt uncomfortable, probably because he thought he now looked vulnerable. So, she went back into the kitchen and finished the food.

The silence was deafening and a little uncomfortable, but Y/N tried not to show it. Ben kept an close eye on her, but she only smiled a little everytime she saw him looking at her her. And everytime he seemed to relax a little more. When they both sat down on the table to eat, Ben poured himself a full glass of whiskey, before he started to speak.

"Who's Jenny?"

Y/N was about to take her first bite but she paused with wide eyes.

"What?" the surprise fully displayed on her face.

"I asked you this once and you didn't wanna talk about it. But now..."

Ben didn't finish his sentence and he didn't need to. She understood what he was getting at. He had a moment of weakness and now he wants her to repay it. She sighed and put her fork aside.

"Jenny was... my sister."

"Was?" he crocked an eyebrow.

"There is a reason why I hate Vaught and the supes." Ben huffed, but Y/N slapped him lighty on the arm. "You knew that already."

"Yeah, yeah..."

She sighed. "Our dad worked in the army. He had a lot of friends that worked for Vaught and once a year... there was some kind of ball. You know? To celebrate a year of good work and to honor certain people. And when my dad decided to retire, the whole family was invited. Jenny was younger than me by two years and I have always been a little protective over her."

The memories from the past started to play infront of her third eye.

"That night, a lot of supes were there, too. And Jenny got introduced to a supe named Skyrider. He was in his mid twenties and he had wings. Strong, fast and he had a charming smile that lured Jenny in." Y/N laughed dryly.

"While she was talking to him, I was wandering around the room. Dad was talking to his general and nobody really noticed me. So, I went out in the hallway to search for the bathroom and there, in a corner, I heard to other supes talk about a woman and what they did to her."

Y/N started to slightly shiver. "I can't remember everything they said, but I remember that I was utterly shocked. They laughed and then I thought 'Oh, maybe they made a joke. A very bad one at that, but... just a joke'. However, days later I still had a bad feeling."

She had wanted to talk about it with her dad, but when she heared that Jenny was starting to date Skyrider, she didn't wanted to ruin it for her. Her sister seemed happy about it and that's all she ever wanted for her. To be happy.

"So, I kept my feeling for myself and for a couple of months everything seemed fine. Jenny was happy and we got to meet Skyrider officially. There was nothing to worry about."

Y/N smiled, but that expression faded quickly. She sucked in her lower lip with her teeth and Ben could see the tears starting to form in her eyes.

"It was on the weekend of the 4th of july. Skyrider wanted to spent the weekend with Jenny somewhere far away. A little trip just for the two of them... but that had me worried again. He didn't wanted to tell us where he would take her to, in sake for it being a surprise." Y/N sighed. "I did not like that."

Now, she grabed Ben's still full glass of whiskey and took a big sip out of it.

"A week later, they still weren't back from their trip and we all started to worry. My dad tried to contact Skyrider, but he was nowhere to be found. Vaught also wasn't willing to help and after another week, we got a phonecall from the police in Mexico City. They had found Jenny. Dead. Skyrider had brought her to an luxury villa... which had security cams installed."

Tears made their way down her cheeks.

"On the video... Skyrider had forced her to take drugs and while he... was recideing about how great the supes were, what great power they held over the world, so that they could do whatever they wanted and that she could be so happy to be with him... he started to force her into sex." Y/N had to get up, couldn't sit down anymore. "He kept talking and talking, but I can't remember any of the words anymore. The only... the only thing I remember were the screams... that escaped my little sister's mouth while he hammered into her so hard... that you could hear her hips break while blood was bursting from her sides."

She couldn't hold herself back anymore. While she hugged herself, Y/N sobbed and turned away from Ben. The supe didn't stay untouched from her telling, he had tuned into her thoughts and the pictures he saw made him understand her pain. He also slowly got up from his stool, the food already forgotten.

"He laughed. All the while... he assaulted and... mutilated her... he kept on laughing." she paused to try to take some deep breaths. "And... when her screams of pain were becoming to much for him... he... he cruched her skull while he came in her..."

Her legs gave in and she landed on her knees while he sobbed uncontrollably. The pain about it all was still so fresh. That's why she never wanted to talk about it. She'd buried it deep inside her and promised to never let her become weak again. Ben could understand that. He came around the table to her, sat down on the floor next to Y/N and scooped her up into his lap. Maybe, just maybe, he asked to much of her.

"I... I should have talked to someone, to my dad... I" she said and clung to Ben's chest like he was the only safety net she needed.

"Sh..." Ben stopped her from talking and rubbed her back lightly. "You could've done nothing against it."

"But... but I could have at least tried!" she looked at Ben. "I should've done something!"

"Y/N..." he took her cheek in his hand and dried it with his thumb. "It's not your fault." He catched her gaze so that she truly listened to him. "Trust me. No matter how... he still would've done it."

And eventhough she did not like it, Y/N could see the truth in his eyes and it made her question, if the supe infront of her that was holding her right now, had once done the same.

A/N: Yeah, the truth hurts. But in this universe it's a fact. And they bonded once more. Hopefully that will not backfire... 😉