#i'm not at all tired yet so i still have time to work on it.......
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Bet IV
p.1 here & p.2 here & p.3 here
mandatory mdni because things will start to get heated up in the following chapters.
summary: you're starting to feel things for the man who hired you to take care of his cat. but he's only being nice. that's it and nothing more. pairing: hwang in-ho/the front man x civilian!reader warnings & content: age gap, afab!reader, slightly detailed descriptions of reader’s background for plot purposes, red text for in-ho, purple for reader, pre 33rd squid game, canon divergent, domestic violence (reader gets slapped by her uncle), veeeery slow burn, reader's dad is dead w/c: 2.1k
a/n: if you would like to be tagged for the next part, please check this post! thank you for reading! please remember that if you asked to be tagged but i can't find your age on your blog, you will NOT be tagged. there will be smut and people dying lol.
"Where were you last night?"
You sighed at your uncle's question, sick and tired of explaining the same thing over and over again. He woke up earlier than he should have, especially for a man who worked night shifts at a warehouse. He did it on purpose, just to have more reasons to pick on you, and you knew that all too well. You lived through that hell for the past ten years.
"I told you, I was cat sitting."
"Cat sitting." He repeated with derision in his voice. "You need to get a real job."
"I have two real jobs." You reminded him, and it took all your willpower not to raise your voice at him.
"Where's the money, then? Huh?" Your uncle grabbed you by the wrist, twisting it backwards.
"I'm getting paid today!"
"How much?"
"660,326!" You cried out as his fingernails dug deeper into your skin.
"I better see that money on my nightstand by tomorrow morning." He let go of your wrist. "Keep the change."
How generous, you thought, rubbing the crescent-shaped dents in your skin. At least he didn't hit you, but your small victory crumbled when he turned on his heels, smacking you with the plastic fly swatter in his hand. Once. Twice. Thrice.
You didn't cry, not in front of him. Never in front of him.
But when you stepped through the doors of Mr. Hwang's penthouse, the dam broke, and tears streamed down your cheeks. They burned when they touched the cracked, swollen skin, courtesy of your uncle, but you still smiled at the sight of Eunjoo.
Instead of waiting next to the water bowl, like she had done before, the cat jumped on the countertop, her paw gently touching your wrist, where the imprinted dents of his fingernails were still visible. You didn't know why, but Eunjoo's gesture made you cry harder, heavy tears falling onto her plate.
"Good kitty." You sobbed, daring to pet her, and she allowed it, nuzzling your hand for the first time since you met her.
Without wasting a single moment, you took out your phone to take a selfie of you and Eunjoo, and sent it to In-ho, with the caption 'Making progress!' You thought he might be happy to see her slowly lower her guard and get attached to you.
Who hurt you?
Stupid. How could you be so stupid to send a selfie when your cheek was grazed and puffy? Of course Mr. Hwang would ask about it, he was a nice man, one whose kindness you didn’t think you deserved.
I accidentally walked into a lamppost! Silly, right?
Hoping that the lie would be convincing enough, you carried on with your tasks after eating with Eunjoo, and to your surprise, it worked. It fooled him, but you weren’t proud of yourself in the slightest.
You need to be more careful next time. If anything happened to you, who would take care of Eunjoo until I return?
It shouldn't have hurt reading his reply, and yet your heart ached. What did you expect? You were an employee, he obviously wanted his cat to be safe, not you. And how could someone like him even care about someone you? You came from different worlds that could never intertwine.
I will.
No thank you, no sad face — you were bitter, even though, rationally, you had no reason to be. Besides, you lied to him in the first place. Maybe if you told him the truth, he would have sent a different reply. It didn't matter. In less than five days he would come back, pay you and never speak to you again. Just like all rich people did.
You cleaned the bathrooms that morning, scrubbing the bath tubs, the toilets, the sinks and the floors until your fingertips stung and your head pounded from the bleach fumes. The vibration of your phone startled you, and you wiped your hands to check the notification.
Have I upset you?
Okay, maybe he did care. Or maybe he was just very observant and noticed your monotonous reply.
Not at all, I just have a lot on my mind. I'm sorry that you worried about me, or that I seemed upset! You're right, I need to be more careful next time.
Please don't take this the wrong way, miss, but I've never met anyone who apologised for making me worry about them. You're quite special.
You did a double take when you read Mr. Hwang's reply, and a wave of remorse crushed your heart. The man was too nice for you to lie to him, but you didn't want him involved in your family affairs, either. There was a strong internal conflict within you, a battle between honesty and dishonesty, but for the time being, dishonesty won, no matter how disgraceful it was.
Choosing not to reply, as time was ticking and the Abduls would be waiting for you soon, you swiftly finished tidying up the bathrooms and put away all the cleaning products so Eunjoo couldn't get to them. With the automatic feeder full, fresh water in the bowl and litter boxes clean, you left.
In all fairness, you didn't know what to reply to his text. No one called you special before, except for that one guy you dated who only wanted to sleep with you, and unfortunately succeeded. It wasn't your proudest moment, but you moved on since then. You stared at the text, typing a reply, then deleting it, then typing again, and you did that for the duration of the entire bus ride back to Guryong Village. By the time you knocked on Ali's door, you still hadn't come up with a response.
What could you even say? Thank you? Likewise? I'm sorry I lied to you, my uncle slapped me with the fly swatter? No. In telling the truth, Mr. Hwang would pity you, perhaps even offer you more money, or food, or clothes, and you didn't want to be pitied. You wanted your hard work to be recognised, not to use your social status or depressing background as an excuse.
Mrs. Abdul couldn't feed you that day, and that was fine. They needed to prioritise themselves, since they didn't live any better than you. Luckily, you saved enough money to buy a kimbap roll for lunch and a bag of rice crackers for dinner and breakfast. Resourcefulness was, perhaps, your strongest point and the reason you survived for so long.
The theme park was packed with tourists and locals, gathering to watch the parade, and you took the time to entertain children and take pictures with them, always on your feet, always working. Back in the dressing room, you took the comically large mascot head off, sweat dripping down your face and neck. Summers were worse — there were body parts you didn't think could sweat.
"Excuse me, Y/N?"
You looked up from your seat to a man around your age, a coworker named Donghyun. He had worked there for a few months or so, but you barely spoke.
"Yes?" You smiled, resting your elbows on the mascot head in your lap.
"We're getting paid today, and a few of us are going for drinks after work. I was wondering if you would like to come." Donghyun avoided looking into your eyes, nervously pinching the soft fur of his own mascot.
"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I have another job I need to get to. Maybe another time."
"Yeah, another time." He nodded. "Hey, could I get your number?"
"Why would you want my number?" You laughed, immediately pursing your lips when Donghyun frowned. "Sorry, yeah, of course I'll give you my number!"
You were such a people pleaser, it was ridiculous, but he seemed to feel better after saving your number in his phone. And there was no harm in making new friends.
"I'll text you later." Donghyun nodded with a smile and left.
What a strange interaction, you thought. It wasn't unusual for men to like you — you were pretty, smart, funny — but you just weren't interested in any of them. In fact, it was their age and maturity that didn't appeal to you. They acted like prepubescent pricks, trying to impress anything with a vagina and a pretty face by being obnoxious and loud and downright irritating.
Older men were different. They had manners, they were respectful and caring. They knew how to dress, knew how to speak to women, kind of like Mr. Hwang.
Oh.
God, you needed to forcibly remove that thought from your mind before it spiraled into something worse. In-ho probably wanted nothing to do with you — no, he definitely didn’t want anything to do with you. He was just a nice gentleman who happened to not be married. Maybe he had a girlfriend that didn't live with him. Or maybe he worked so much he couldn't afford a relationship.
Maybe he murdered people.
You laughed at that ridiculous idea — no one in their right mind would do that, especially not Mr. Hwang. He had a cat, for God's sake. Murderers usually killed animals, surely he was just a normal man with a lot on his mind, a workaholic, or a hermit.
Walking into your boss' office, you received your pay and counted the money — 662,326. You got more than you should've, completely forgetting about the pay rise. Your uncle didn't need to know about that, and you took the extra 2,326 and hid it in a small pocket inside your backpack, along with other money you saved. Unbeknownst to him, you secretly opened a savings account in the hopes that one day you would be able to leave and rent your own place, but you only had 1,094,463.60 won, which was barely enough to cover the deposit.
One day. One day you would leave all that abuse behind and have a fresh start. But today was not that day.
Back in Gangnam-gu, you entered the penthouse earlier than normal and dropped your bag on the floor next to your worn and torn boots. You were hoping they would last through winter because you really couldn't afford a new pair. Eunjoo ran to greet you for the first time, and your heart was filled with joy at the sight of the cat rubbing against your leg. She was growing on you, and you soon realised how much you'd miss her when Mr. Hwang returned. Perhaps he'd let you visit her.
You turned the TV on and played some songs by ABBA, the sadness of the morning gone, replaced only by joy and optimism. Things would turn out well, you just knew it. You grabbed In-ho's black clothes and placed them in the washing machine, all the while dancing to the beat of Money, Money, Money. It was a song you related to, but you didn't want to find a wealthy man. You just wanted to have enough money to survive without your uncle.
"It's a rich man's world." You sang to Eunjoo, who wiggled her butt, playfully attacking your feet.
"All the things I could do if I had a little money, kitty. I would get my own apartment, I would donate to orphanages and charities. Oh, don't look at me like that." You frowned when Eunjoo stared at you judgmentally. "I would! There are people out there who need help. But you know what I would get for me? A hotteok! Ah, I would kill for that cinnamony goodness."
You placed the food on the floor and opened the pack of rice crackers.
"My dad got me a hotteok on my seventh birthday. It was the best birthday ever and- oh my God, I'm talking to a cat." Laughing at the sudden realisation, you shook your head in disbelief. "Well, you're probably my only friend anyway. You don't judge me. You don't care if I'm rich or poor. You just listen and eat. Oh!"
Good evening, Mr. Hwang! Could I ask what your favourite dish is?
You decided that would be your gift. Cooking wasn't your strongest skill, but you were confident in yourself. And who didn't want to come back to a hot home-made meal? Maybe he liked jajangmyeon, or jjigae, or something sweet, like chapssaltteok. The possibilities were endless.
Beef Wellington. Why?
Your heart sunk to your stomach. Beef fucking Wellington? How on Earth could you even afford all the ingredients? The tenderloin itself was probably over 65,000 won. But you were going to do it for him, regardless of what it cost. You felt that Mr. Hwang deserved it.
I was hoping to cook it for you when you returned. I'll admit, I didn't think it would be such a... fancy dish, but I'm sure I can manage.
Have you tried it before?
I'm afraid not. Is it good?
Exquisite. You'll have to stay and try it when I return, yes?
Chewing on your bottom lip, your heart skipped a beat at his request. You knew he was just being nice, but you couldn't stop the sudden burning desire to just obey.
Yeah, I'll stay.
tagging: @ri1liane @anmert1 @syraxnyra @frshluvcats @lanyia @mettreads @nightdark-dreamdark @bridge-always @lovekm @audrey223 @ririgy @starkeyszn @hobiesbrownsgf @thoughtfulbelieverstrawberry @maria-trisha @akiqvq @10hrs26mn @tenzko @okaycharr @politicstanner @moonxknightx @googie-jeon @swthrtbyeol @mariiestfu @ratsnestinmyhair @missroro @talia-the-gemini @fortluocha @true-queen-of-mischief @ssa-callahan @bibliophile-yomna @wwastro @heartsforseo @marymun @glads-stuff @starryeddie @kisses2kanao @gagaga167 @l4venderia @scryi @lelisae @twicelover2 @ashtrosstuff @cruel-affair @cdej6 @veragrhm @nikos-a-clown @cchewhaz @pepsicolacoochie @lily-ann-b @red22wolf @nellabear @unabletonotlovesatoru @happiness2112 @waterjewelsspite @luna-looniesnlog @plan3t-plut0 @full-sunnies @houta-habtet-houta @alexisabirdie @riri53 @bluehourss
#hwang in ho#hwang in ho x reader#hwang in ho x you#hwang in ho x y/n#hwang inho#hwang inho x reader#hwang inho x you#hwang inho x y/n#squid game#squid game x reader#squid game x you#squid game x y/n#afab reader
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Biscuits
Nyx didn’t have much of an idea of just how long he had been laying there. He wasn’t aware of anything. Not his limbs, or his wings. Not of the bed beneath him, or his room at the House of the Wind that he had escaped to. He certainly didn’t register his feelings. Nyx just lay there numbly, staring at the blank wall before him. The sun had begun to set and the last vestiges of light crawled back behind the heavy curtains that he had drawn shut. Perhaps he had slept, he couldn’t be too sure. He was so tired. The moods crept on him slowly the past several weeks. He was angry at first, lashing out at everyone about silly things, getting into stupid arguments with his father. Then the anger twisted into anxiety and sadness, suddenly. Panic balled itself up into sobs in his chest that threatened to release at any time, which they did when he was alone in his room.
Tired of his mother asking him constantly what was wrong, Nyx found the sadness gone one day, like a soap bubble popping. Instead, a buzzing numbness had settled into his head and chest. Letters from his Day Court cousins sat unopened on his desk, he couldn’t seem to stomach their happiness and he had stopped writing all together. He had slogged through the past several days in a blur, but today his father confronted him about his countenance. Nyx sat and stared blankly at the wall as his father lectured him. When it was over, he got up and flew to the House without a word. The afternoon sun was still high, and he dragged his body towards his room at the back of the house. If anyone knew he was there, they hadn’t disturbed him.
The trim moulding along the ceiling didn’t move as Nyx stared at it. Somewhere, very far away, the door behind him creaked. Nyx squeezed his eyes shut, pretending to sleep so whoever it was would leave him alone.
Something soft landed on the bed, while the smell of chocolate and the sounds of soft breathing crept towards him. The bedside lamp flicked on. Bracing himself, Nyx cracked one eye open. Ori, his four year old cousin, stood in front of him with a soggy chocolate-chip scone in her hand and a concerned look on her face. Her cat, Pudding crept down from his shoulder, his green eyes wide.
“How did you know I was here?” Nyx mumbled.
“House told me,” Ori climbed her way up onto the bed with one hand, crumbs scattering all over the duvet as she sat in front of him. “What’s wrong, Nyxie?” her voice was hushed.
“Dunno, just sad I guess. House talks?”
Ori nodded, “House said you went in your room. I got you somefing to eat ‘cause you missed dinner.” she held out the scone, misshapen and melted in her stubby fingers.
Nyx wasn’t hungry, he hadn’t eaten much in days, but he ate the scone anyway. It made Ori happy. He reached over her, gulping down the water that the House had now provided.
"Does anyone else know I'm here," Nyx asked.
"Mama knows, but Papa doesn't yet. Mama will tell him in a little bit. Why are you sad?” Ori asked, her owlish blue eyes were soft and riddled with concern he didn’t deserve, “Are you in trouble?”
Nyx shook his head as he sunk lower into himself, curling his wings behind him and drawing up his knees. “I’m not sure,” he repeated, “it just came one day and hasn’t really gone away.”
“Mama calls them down days, she says they come and you gotta be ready,” Ori nodded sagely, “lots of sleep and treats. And a baff, to get the sadness off." She checked off an invisible list, like a little winged librarian.
Nyx gave a half hearted laugh which turned into a sputter of surprise as Pudding began to work and knead his paws into Nyx’s stomach. “What are you doing?” he mumbled, scratching the fluffy cat under his chin.
“Makin’ biscuits!” Ori giggled, “he’s trying to get comfy. Scoot over, I wanna get comfy too.”
Nyx moved as Ori wiggled her way next to him, grabbing his hand tight. “I’m sorry you’re sad, I hope you feel happy soon.”
“Me too,” Nyx swallowed a lump of tears back into his throat, but they escaped out of his eyes anyway. He began to sob softly, and Ori reached out her hands and roughly wiped away the tears on his cheek and hugged him, while Pudding curled up between them and purred. The vibrations and hug began to calm him.
“Love you Nyxie,” she whispered, as she grabbed his hand tightly. “It will be a happy day soon.”
“Love you too, Ori.” and sleep took them both into its embrace.
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Dr. Hot Stuff
Summary: You're probably the only nurse who hasn't slept with Surgeon Johnny Storm and you're happy to keep it that way.
Warnings: Age gap, Implied smut, Medical setting, Talk about surgeries. Please let me know if I missed any!
A/N: Many thanks to @bigtreefest for help with the medical terminology and more!
A/N2: Reader is 35+ years old and female. No other physical descriptors used.
You feel like a zombie, asleep on your feet after an incredibly long surgery. As much as you liked being Dr. Beck's go-to nurse for long and complicated surgeries, it still took a hell of a toll on you. As soon as you were cleaned up and in fresh scrubs, you were headed to the sleeping area.
When the doorknob doesn't turn you blink as your brain tries to process why you're not already laying down. You try a few more times but nothing. Is it stuck? It's not supposed to be locked.
Then the sounds of giggles and moans pierce through your brain fog and you put the pieces together. Dr. Johnny Storm, aka Dr. Hot Stuff, doing his regular, pre-surgery "ritual" with one of the nurses. You roll your eyes and shake your head. You should break down the door just out of fully justified spite! But you know you won't get much support. Apparently Dr. Hot Stuff earned his nickname. If there's one thing you'll give Storm, it's that his partners have no complaints, and they are the type to complain.
You slink off to the break room to find a recliner for a nap.
You're startled awake by Johnny loudly celebrating his latest successful surgery. He's proudly proclaiming his mastery over the appendectomy to anyone and everyone who will hear. You roll your eyes and start getting out of the recliner. You should be used to these kinds of things by now. Young surgeons are always so loud and proud.
Before you can get out of the recliner, though, Johnny steps in front of you.
"If it isn't my favorite veteran nurse," he smirks.
"What do you want, Dr. Storm," you sigh.
"You know you can call me Johnny, like all the other nurses, right?" he raises an eyebrow, grin never dropping. "I'm just trying to be friendly but you keep shutting me out."
"I just woke up, Johnny. And I'm still very tired. I'd be friendlier if I could've actually slept in a bed." You give him your best glare, hoping it would get him to back off, maybe apologize.
Instead his smile widens, "oh, sorry about that. Next time I'll make sure you get to join in." He winks and you scoff.
"I'm out of here," you shake your head. "I've gotta get back to work."
"Wait, please, I wanna talk to you!"
"About what?"
His facial expression changes into puppy dog eyes that your certain would work on a younger you. "Can you put in a good word for me with Dr. Beck?"
Your eyebrows crinkle in confusion. "What?"
"I'm doing so damn well with these appendectomies and cholecystectomies that I could do them in my sleep," he explains. "I want to get into doing the interesting surgeries, the ones that'll help my career, you know?"
"You haven't mastered the mundane yet," you tell him and he rolls his eyes while giving you a groan. "It's incredibly important for surgeons, especially new ones like yourself, to get experience with the variety that can come from even a simple procedure."
"What variety?" he protests. "It's all the same procedure. The same hand motions. The same instructions."
“You’re about to sever the common bile duct but your view is partially blocked by a section of hard adipose tissue. What do you do?”
"Predict where the duct continues under the fat tissue and make the incision,” he shrugs as if it should be obvious.
“WRONG," you loudly scold. "You just nicked the hepatic artery. Your patient is bleeding out.”
He starts pouting but you continue to grill him. You can tell he's studied but he's just too inexperienced and he continually falls short. Given how red he's getting, you can tell he knows it as well. When you finally let up on the questions he backs up so you can get out of the recliner but he's definitely not happy.
"Bet you'd put in a good word for me if you helped me with my pre-surgery ritual," he grouses.
"Not gonna happen, Junior."
"You sure?" he raises an eyebrow in that way you know works on the younger nurses. "I bet I could make you feel young again."
"I'm sure. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna get back to work."
"I'll get you to change your mind one of these days," he promises with a wink.
You roll your eyes and shake your head. "Whatever helps you sleep at night."
"Ooo! Giving me permission to think of you next time I can't sleep?"
You facepalm. "I walked right into that one."
Tagging: @alicedopey; @darsynia; @delicatebarness; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @irishhappiness; @lokislady82; @ronearoundblindly; @thiquefunlover63
#johnny storm x reader#johnny storm x you#johnny storm x female!reader#johnny storm x f!reader#surgeon!johnny storm#doctor!johnny storm#doctor!johnny storm x nurse!reader#johnny storm x older!reader
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Hello lovely fandom! It’s tiiimmeeeee. I’m so ready for this premiere. This hiatus felt like the longest one yet. Probably cause they weren’t allowed to share literally anything for months and months. While I might still gripe we’re only getting 18 and 20 would’ve been better….I am psyched to be analyzing a new season ❤️
Changing these up to First impressions cause mini and I don’t get along in terms of brevity. Now imma try and be briefer since I’ll be doing a deep dive next summer. Hopefully in our next hiatus. *fingers crossed* The library still a turd for new gifs. So had to make all mine. Also I must have a new angle at my new place. So they came out not how I wanted lol But after a full day of work I was too tired to re-do them all. It's a miracle this is coming out with how tired I am haha Anyways bear with me and hopefully next weeks gifs are better ha Off we go!
7x01 The Shot.
Cool thanks recap. Not like we forgot the breakup that ruined us all…Would like to say someday that won't ruin me to watch, but that's a lie...Love that to leave the lineup for recaps now. Thanks.
It's the little things like them sitting next to each other in the swat car that make me so happy. Not gonna lie I was grinning like a damn fool just seeing them seated together. God I missed them. Straight giddy them working together in the field. It’s where they originated. It’s where they’re going to heal.
I love her directing him in the field. That snap of her fingers and he knows instantly what she needs and follows. That beautiful rhythm only they can achieve. Silent communication at it's finest folks. Mmm loving this. Lucy taking down a dude double her size and Tim coming in to help finish him off. Hot damn I love them in the field. Legit ship crack to me everyone. Look at those beautiful humans in motion above. I can't get enough.
Oooh lord T.O Tim *fans self* Mmm Can’t say haven’t missed him. I'll be real honest. Yum. Thank you Nolan for not undermining him while he sized them up. We would've had words sir. It probably shouldn't delight me watching him tear them apart, and yet here we are with me drooling over him. With zero regrets. Just nice to see him in his element after being knocked out of it last year. I shall enjoy this year for him I can already tell.
Ha! Bingo card hit. That's one square down. ‘Grey guides Lucy with her career.’ Yasss I’m a dork I know but you all knew this ha Grey pulling strings to get her to T.O. "Temp." I’m sure it’ll stick. He see’s what a good teacher and leader she is. Look at him jumping starting this for her. Nudging her in the right direction.
Lucy not being sure....Still battling with that UC identity and detective path. Some left over S6 bleh hanging around. I think Grey is setting her path and she has no idea how ‘not temporary’ this will be. At least IMO. I see her excelling at this and wanting to stay at it. Plus like Grey said it’ll strengthen her position should detective come back up. Also like to list the reasons why I think this will be good for her.
One it'll rebuild her confidence. Something we all know was shattered and then run over by s6. Second it'll give her a new purpose and clarity for her career. (Which is also a bingo square for me. Yes I'll be tallying mine all year lol) Now she has to accept being a FT one for it to apply but I think it will. Lastly it'll get rid of the pesky 'Chain of Command' issue for them later on. Because we don't want that again.
Tim enters the chat and he is a most welcome addition. The mini banter about her training. I'm here for it and I love love love it. Look at the flirty smirks on these idiots. Like breathing fresh air once again. The small smirks have me reeling. Gimme. Grey although has no time for this LOL Ushering their asses out. Just happy they can breathe the same air again and not have it be nuclear.
Then the real banter begins. I’ve missed them so much. I wanna cry. Tim instantly offering to give her tips. Is this one of his small doses? Possibly I think he would’ve offered this as an olive branch either way tbh. But I love seeing how eager he is to bond with her over this. Lucy’s so cute with her ‘ My rookie.’ Girl you’re gonna wanna stay a T.O. I already see it.
Lucy of course has her sassy answer locked and loaded for him. He answers right back. Goodness their banter is top tier. And woo another bingo card for me. Well this was not in my official bingo card. BUT I did say how if she ended up as a T.O. this season this would happen. In my 6x08 review said they would end up doing a bet over who trains a better rookie. And here we are. I'm enjoying my spoils and grinning like a happy fool. Which is nice after spending the second half of s6 being emotionally spent and destroyed.
Oh Lucy, like you could ever walk way from your man about a competitive bet of all things. This is how they’re gonna heal my friends. Going back to the beginning. To their roots. Where this rock solid bond was started. In the field. Along with some banter and fiery competition thrown in. This new dynamic has me so giddy I can’t even contain myself.
You can see how excited Tim is she’s going to be a T.O. With him. Flirting with her by offering this up. Moth to a flame with her in general. But this? Man is raring to go. Being a T.O and competition with his girl? He is beaming with excitement. Also probably knows this is a good way to further his cause of mending fences.
The goading of her oh my lord. It’s s4 all over again and I’m here for it. Except Tim is far more aware he’s in love with this woman. The straight teasing and flirting in front of the entire station. Welcome back. Oh my word I love sfm. His telling smirk is amazing. Reeling her back in slowly LOL
Nolan actually ignites more flirty flirts for them when he tells them about the ringer. Because classic John can't shut his yapper. I’ve truly missed this high grade goodness though. Lucy accusing him of hustling her haha Tim deescalates her like only he can with his strong logic. Saying it's actually harder that he has previous experience. He’s not wrong. First thing I thought about him when they said he had experience…Poor Seth called a virgin lmao
The rookies get assigned and we get jealous/protective Tim. Welcome back to our screens. You've been missed. *grabs ice water* This premiere is trying to kill me in the best way. I was here for the show. You tell that cocky little boy babe. I think someone else had one of the rookies flirts with Lucy in their bingo card. So you get that square ha The balls to do that in front of Tim. This kid has a death wish on wheels.
Ovary explosion at the way he barked at him though. Man is making me thirsty af. Also this kid is not a ringer in the least. I know what it’s like to de-program someone. It’s not easy. When I would get someone from another team (and terrible manager btw) I would spend the first 30 days just getting rid of the bad habits before I could begin to mold them. So ringer he is not....Lucy has a better shot with fresh meat tbh. Seth is far more impressionable. Hence her finishing line above.
Tim TEARS Texas a new one. Was kind of hoping he would. Nothing like a solid Tim T.O. rant. This kid needed it holy cow. Too damn cocky for a rookie even with experience. Makes it worse. Get em Tim! I’m enjoying this far too much. Haha Mmm. Sidelines his ass as he should. Maybe he can rejoin when his ego is in check.
This scene had me cackling. First off look at them both with crossed arms. I'm dying. Also Lying liars who lie LOL Both struggling a little bit with their rookies. It’s hilarious. Can’t ever admit fault of course. Very s4 vibes going on here I love it sfm.
Friggin Nolan has to be include himself...Listen John they checked the guest list for this work flirt convo. You're not on it sir. So needy this one. He actually didn't bug me much at all in this one. Probably the lack of Bailey....
Tim’s final T.O scene has me drooling holy hell. The jacket, the stern taking to, and telling them to suck less? I’m dying hahaha I loved how this was shot. Seeing the faces as Tim grills them both. Putting them in place. I love it sfm I'm so VERY excited for this season for him. If this was our look into it I am ready for more.
Oh my word, this final scene of theirs. If you don’t feel giddy, and a sense of promise for reconciliation from this interaction, I can't help you. LOL. I mean that in the nicest way haha I really do. The subtext running through this scene like a bullet train of hope. The moment begins with puppy dog Tim. Let’s take a second to contrast how he just was with the rookies earlier. To seeing his girl in the parking lot. That's the Lucy Chen effect.
That man is walking on air, and beaming his best ‘Lucy’ smile as he approaches her car, looking like a damn snack I wanna devour. I adore the swapping of stories. Giving each other shit but staying confident in their abilities to right their rookies ships as it were. Lucy saying ‘Tomorrow is another day.’ With Tim’s hopeful ‘Yes it is.’ Got me all in my damn feels. To me it’s a positive setup for the entire season. The low key flirty vibes here are glorious first and foremost. Second the flirting inside the promise with those two lines has me reeling.
The smiles they both convey just shows our babies are healing. Lucy is healing. She isn’t holding back with the positivity and flirting right back. There is this underlying UST too. But the most beautiful part is their talk about 'Tomorrow'. Tomorrow is another day for them to get one step closer to being who they once were. Only stronger. Tim’s 'Yes it is.' Is everything. His tone of voice, how he’s looking at her, and that determination to make something out of every day he gets with her. Driven to make tomorrow a day he inches one step closer to the promise he made in the elevator in 6x10. Oooh lord I’m excited for this season.
I said couple days ago how amped I was for this new dynamic. Them being T.O’s together and finding their way back in this fashion. It’s a fantastic and true to them way to do it. Couldn’t be more excited. The LOOKS everyone my god. The way he is pining after her. Doesn’t tear eyes away for a second as she pulls off. And our girl checks the mirror not once but TWICE.
Making eyes right back at him. This scene should excite the hell out of you. I’m scaling the walls right now haha This is as a very very promising opening episode for them. Little more proof they're going to make their way back. Won't be right away but it's coming. This is what I was longing for when we left off all those months ago.
For them to be in a better place to even start this healing. I’m so ready for this journey. I really am. Trusting the writers to do this at the right pace. So when it does happen and it will. We’re gonna be on cloud 9 x1000 Ooof lord that was good. They know how to close out an ep our ship. Watched promo for next ep. I’m vibrating with excitement.
The UST I feel from that little clip is the beauty of Eric and Melissa. This season gonna be incredible i feel it deep in my soul baha Now I’m excited we don’t have a break now that we’re here. As always thank you thank you thank you. To any and all who comments(love me to chat don’t be shy wanna theorize with you all) , like or reblog these. You have no idea how much it means to me. Also proud of myself for keeping this brief ish for me lol Below is my side notes feel free to comment on anything said in this or below till next week my lovely fandom :)
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Side notes non Chenford
No Bailey in a the premiere was already staring off with a win for me. Sorry Jenna but ya know lol sorta not….really…
Lieutenant Grey! So happy for him. Solid reasoning why he got it. Sucks he feels bad but I'm glad for him.
Lots of action off the bat hot damn. They said we'd have more and I loved it
Oooh loving Wes being assumed to the station. Welcome sir. Happy to have you and more Wopez moments to come.
Aaron went to north Hollywood someone had to lol Makes sense he would leave due to Blair. Also leaves the door open for him to return someday. Which makes my heart happy.
Poor Wes has to hear the recording of a man wanting to do things to his wife lol oh my lord. He’s legit having a meltdown about it hahah I sense some trouble for Wopez. Should be interesting season for them.
#Caitlin's First Impressions#chenford#the rookie 7x01#7x01 The Shot#the rookie#tim x lucy#lucy chen#tim bradford#s7#eric winter#melissa oneil#otp: doing my job
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A wider smile wasn't possible, even if she tried. Laurel could only return his small nose kiss with one of her own, her hand reaching to softly caress the back of his neck. "I'm just really glad you're safe." That was always her biggest worry when he went away, even more when he was out for extended periods of time. The twinkle in his eyes was mesmerizing, oh she could stare at him all evening. "Conserve water, you are so thoughtful," she whispered as she snuggled close to him. His promise to behave made her smirk inevitable. If she could, she'd wonder out loud if that promise was negotiable. "I have a feeling our girl will put him through the wringer, he'll be even more ready to be a dad."
His hum vibrated against her skin, and his breathy laugh caused a shiver to fall over her. "Wouldn't dream of it," she said with a content sigh. After all, Laurel loved his sneaky side. Loved every part of him, the thought of him being any other way was unfathomable. "Oh tiny angels, I love the sound of that. Eager for our next one, huh? I'm in, a little bit down the road."
For a bit, Laurel thought he was teasing and Diego was just chiming in, playing along. But, Eli said it again and it didn't sound like just teasing anymore. He made good points there, not that it took a lot to convince her. She was on leave, no work to worry about, and Laurel had to admit she liked the idea of being close. "You know, I never thought you'd be asking me to move in with you, twice in one lifetime," she finally teased, effectively telling him she was on board with the idea. "Putting a pause on FaceTime dinners was also tempting too though. We can figure out moving later though."
Seeing his happiness meant the world to her. Years had passed, and yet she still saw those green eyes light up the way the same way they had their first year celebrating his birthday together. "You deserve the entire world," she mumbled against his lips, laughing as the frosting rested on her nose. "I love you," she'd never tire of telling him, pulling him in for a brief hug. It didn't take long for his colleagues to agree on a starting point to sing happy birthday for him, before chanting asking him to make a wish. Diego quickly nudging Ortiz to take pictures of Eli and his cake. They would need pictures of this special occasion after all.
He nuzzled into her face and gave her nose a small little kiss. He enjoyed the pda they'd endulge in every time they were out and about. It was these moments that carried him through when he didn't think he had anymore to give. "About fifteen percent. It's just people being stupid and dumb thinking they can do shit like that and not get hurt. Or burn a house down. Luckily no casualties but still stressful." His grin showed off his dimple and that twinkle in his eyes. "Yes ma'am. Whatever you say. We could conserve water and take one together. I promise I'll behave." It was his thing he needed to shower every night after work. He didn't know how people could shower in the mornings and then climb into bed like that. "Isa has always been a dad in training. I know he's gonna be a hell of a dad. Rosebud is his best girl."
He hummed into her ear and let out a breathy laugh. One of his fingers trailed down her back to her sides as he breathed her in. "But you wouldn't have it any other way, baby." He lifted his head and smirked. "Next one? Hmm sign me up. Let's have all the tiny angels."
"Move in. At least until my schedule goes back to normal. I don't like being away from you two and I know you'll have help with my sisters here but think of all the dinners we won't have on FaceTime." He tried to bribe her into saying yes as he heard Diego sign himself up for nursery building.
One second he was watching Diego carry his daughter and the next his eyes were on his cake. A chuckle escaped him as he looked up at his wife. Bringing her face to his he kissed her and put frosting on the tip of her nose before he whispered a low thank you. "I knew it. I love it. Thank you."
#WHY DO YOU MAKE ME CRY BABY BOY HAVING THAT SAME FACE I'M-#isa not being happy but what else is new#hahah now he's gotta take trips to the firehouse to see his niece#pls we never mind him here in the fort!
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🥹
#their smiles 😣#the way she cradles his face 😣#the outfits 😣#going insane actually#rina#spent the last two hours daydreaming instead of working on the gifset i was supposed to have done today... my bad JHDJHFK#might be stalling just a bit#i'm not at all tired yet so i still have time to work on it.......#but like. ☹️#txt
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OKAY, IT'S FINALLY HITTING
(will you guys hate me if I post this longfic a month later than planned?)
#i'm tired of working on a long project i can't start publishing yet!#i've been working on this thing since mid july i think?#early august at the very latest#so i THINK i'm going to take october off and mainly work on my little oneshots for a bit!#it'll push all the plans back by a month but i think it'll be worth it#bc i can't write good content when i'm not having fun with it#(also i think i'm literally the only person who cares about this thing staying on schedule so as long as /I/ say it's fine to push it)#(then it's fine right?)#the amazing news tho is that this is a HUGE stretch of daily writing progress for me#and i am still actively enamored with writing fic#just need a break from writing fic i can't share because the external validation is an important part of the process!#anyway i also think after this big project#i might have a better handle on longform stuff#so it MAY not be so much an issue next time if i figure out how to outline better#so i don't have to rely on finishing the entire fic's rough draft before posting the first chapter
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Literally can't pay my rent until I get paid for September, which hasn't happened yet. Today is Friday, and Monday is the last day of the month. I'm so tired of being poor.
#i still cringe to call myself 'poor' bc i have my own apartment and can afford groceries#and even fun stuff like museums and cafe visits and public transport sometimes#but the reality of the matter is that after i pay off my student loans every month#i do not have enough money left to pay the following month's rent#and that's the way it's been my whole life#all my groceries and museum visits and coffee come from those few hundred euros left over#my whole life i've been choosing between 'having savings' and 'having even the smallest most humble life' and obviously i choose the latter#i never go to the movies#i buy all my clothes second hand (got some this past month after not having bought any new clothing in almost two years)#i have visited a museum TWICE this year#i go to restaurants like... once a month max#i am living the most frugal life that i possibly can without denying myself all pleasures#i don't even have netflix or anything like that! i only very rarely order delivery! i cook my own damn meals!#you get the picture#and yet still: one single missed paycheck is enough to potentially fuck up my life seriously#i've never missed a rent payment in my life but i'm scared it may happen this time#just wrote to HR of my former employer (who is supposed to still be paying me through october) to politely ask where my paycheck is#it's probably coming today (i sure as hell hope so) but if it doesn't... i legit don't know how i'm going to pay my rent#my rent is 673 euros and i only have 400 in my bank account#i probably have enough food in my pantry to survive for a month if i had to#but i've never missed rent in germany before (or ever) and i have no idea how long they'd wait before evicting me for non-payment#i'm scared. and i'm tired of being apparently the only fucking person in my social groups who is this poor#i am an over-educated 37-year-old professional who typically gets classed with the 'expats'#but one missed salary payment has me thinking about eviction and affording groceries#this is what i mean when i say i'm an immigrant. not an expat.#those people with their apple watches and co-working spaces and spontaneous trips to thailand or brazil are... a world apart from me#how come everyone i meet is so damn rich? where do i find fellow poor friends?#anyway i'm stressed. and i'm so so tired of spending my mental energy worrying about money#cosmo gyres#personal
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Consider Yelan's facial expression to be my own in reaction to opinions shared on both X and Tumblr, and I guess I'm in the minority of the 'loud ones', but I'm pretty excited for Natlan since that trailer, actually. The previous teasers left me a little 'eh', but this definitely got my hopes back up, and I'm back in the right spirits for it (and ready to catch some Pokémon.)
Now I wouldn't be me if I didn't touch on the salt that I've seen scattered across the dash, so here I go. Listen, I read people's objections and I see what you're all aiming at, but in that light want to note that it's often incredibly easy to point fingers (arguably too much so) at others while being, quite honestly, hopefully rather aware that many of our own countries, cultures, and its populations across the board (and no, I'm not excluding anyone here) would likely be just as easily guilty as MHY is with these things. And no, I'm not blindly defending them, but I also won't point fingers at only one without pointing them everywhere else as well, including those you might think would 'never do such things', because I'm absolutely certain that they would. /continues on in the tags.
#we all wear biased lenses. and no-- 'informing yourself through social media' doesn't make you aware of how cultures work/look.#people informing themselves through social media is the /worst trend/ that the 2000/2010s have ever brought us. it's insane.#i'm sorry i'm also very tired of people deciding who are minorities and when. and who is allowed to 'get away with things' and who aren't.#and who is guilty and who isn't. and how “everyone is supposed to do everything right” when most people don't even know...#how the culture of their neighboring country genuinely looks outside of simple stereotypes (and usually only bad ones).#we also need to ultimately realize that mhy is chinese. it has (uniquely) gotten a lot of praise for its presentation of japanese culture.#(from what i hear) which is incredibly rare for a chinese company (and others). and then...#it's doing cultures further away from its own less justice. it didn't exactly do mondstadt great. it played into stereotypes.#and then combined them from multiple cultures. same with fontaine. it played into stereotypes /yet again/ in the same way the west does it.#and not just stereotypes from one country and culture. but /several/. but do most people who aren't familiar with those cultures know this?#no. they don't. and why would they? look at even just the west. europe and north america think that they're similar. /they are so not/.#if WE can't/won't even get it right. and yet we pretend to every damned day; why are we condemning a country halfway across the globe?#and also no-- i don't think latam or africa would portray china properly. or france. or the states.#... but you know what all this'll still do? cause people to look up and go 'hey this is so cool-- i want to know the inspiration'.#and people will still look into it. and people will learn.#and people will be drawn to them in life outside of their homes. or at least the ones who want to touch grass. and maybe even foreign grass#sanity knows i've looked infinitely more into chinese culture and customs because of liyue than ever before. with a much higher...#interest than i've ever admittedly had in regards to china. /ever/. just like i've had other games do the same for other cultures...#way across the globe.#[ salt. ] should i be quieter next time? / no. no… it's fine. children don't learn unless you shout at them.#[ out of character. ] don't bend or water it down. don't try to make it logical. rather: follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.
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This might be a hot take(?) but i do like how Eddy become more grumpy as the show went between seasons
Of course he is more mean and kinda more aggressive with his friends.
But i think it's a great way to show how trauma can affect your personality, especially when it comes to physical abuse. Not every child that suffers like that is quiet and shy, some of them can mirror the bad traits of their abuser and they're just as valid to get love and support.
#Eddy's character has to be the most interesting among all the characters i love that ugly short king so much#he does act greedy he lies and he also yells a lot but it so so normal for a kid who suffer abuse from an adult#i found so sad how ppl will tell you he is the worst of the eds just for the way he is#despite the fact he has the WORST situation between the three of them#with all this i'm not defending his behaviour! it's still wrong and he should be better than that but as i said he is a kid!!#this doesn't mean i don't love chill eddy ofc!! but i do think the latter works better for his character arc#idk if he would ever do stuff like therapy but i do think he would reach a point where he is tired of just... being angry#i do agree with the hc that he is not the type of just having one job i do think the little bastard will have multiple part time jobs#he is unable to remain in one thing and he does have curiosity for everything#but aside from all that i just like the idea of him getting away of his family. not in the sense of never speaking to them#but more like... not having to deal with them every day.#that's when i think his more chill yet cheeky self will go back to him ahaha#also he is dating double d ofc#there's no future where i don't see them together giendkdn#don't think they marry or anything. but they would grow old together and Ed lives in the basement#eene
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All my life I've been told by all kinds of people that they can never really tell what I'm feeling or what's going through my mind because apparently I'm always just hiding everything behind a smile so that I've become rather unreadable. And then he just. Takes one look at me and goes 'Yeah. I know that face, oh here we go again, she's about to unleash her thoughts. She's gonna bash that theory I just showed her so hard. Where's my popcorn?' I hadn't even said anything yet and he was already laughing.
And to be honest. It's quite nice to be known, actually.
#i only went to his office to ask if he wants to join me for lunch he didn't have time and yet i still somehow ended up staying for 1.5 hours#'thanks for the conversation' he said when i left. 'and thanks for keeping me from my work'#as if HE hadn't kept me from lunch when he kept our conversation going on and on with his 'wait i still wanted to show you this'#talking to him always feels like wellness for my brain somehow. like. we're different people but we think the same way.#i don't have to translate my thoughts to be understood he already gets my point before i've even finished my train of thought#every time work tires me out so much that it feels like i can't think straight anymore then i talk to him and suddenly my brain works again#and i like how he calls me out on my nonsense when i lose myself in a contradiction or don't say what i want to say or say what i don't mea#and he lets me go on extensive rants about statistics despite not knowing anything about it and doesn't even complain#he just always says 'i'll pretend i know what that means' and says i should learn it well so he can ask me for my help with it later#recently he came to me right after teaching saying 'you won't believe how much i just messed up. let me show you how i failed'#and then proceeded to recreate the entire situation and his thought process at that moment and i just#there is a very big word running around in my mind that i dare not speak of but maybe one day#i don't even know if he even sees me as much as a friend maybe i'm just some co-worker he likes talking to occasionally you know#what does it mean what does it all mean#ramblings
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#rant cw#mental health cw#negativity cw#I literally just need to scream somewhere so please feel free to ignore this - I'll be fine#I'm so tired of working my ass off so my family don't get angry at me while I'm staying with them (I'm still sofa surfing unfortunately)#All while I'm dealing with all my mental illnesses RAW because I'm still waiting on a therapist#only to have family members act like I'M the lazy one or imply I only do half jobs#got back home 20 minutes before they arrived back and I'd already:#moved the sofa beds - put the bedsheets away - moved their chairs back to their desks - made some tea and my sisters hot water bottle#got my nephews drink and his tablet - empty my sister's ashtray - I HADN'T EVEN EATEN ANYTHING YET AND IT WAS LIKE 4PM#and what I get is my sister using the phrase 'don't pull a mags' when my mum only half-did a job after dinner#keep in mind this is the same woman (my sister) who refuses to do washing up 'because of her nails'#but at the same time god forbid I freak out WHILE STILL DOING THE JOBS I'M ASKED TO because of sensory issues - then I'm overreacting#GOD FORBID I STRUGGLE AND STILL DO THE THING#I'm so fucking tired of never being good enough for people for FUCK SAKE I'M TRYING AND I'M BURNING MYSELF OUT DOING SO#I need to get out of this fucking situation this year I s2g#I'm so fucking tired -#I know it was a small comment from her this time but it felt like a punch to the chest because I'm TRYING SO HARD#maybe I'm being stupid and overreacting but feelings are stupid sometimes ig- idk man#ooc || the birb speaks
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have to be honest guys its actually going Really Badly again.
#j.txt#vent#barest thread holding me back right now and I dont even know what to do to fix it besides trying to repress it as deep as possible#I'm just. so overwhelmed and tired and frantic all the time. Work is giving me authority positions I didnt ask for and am not paid to do#my family is insane as always and I'm extra on edge around them bc I can just sense the impending fallout-#from when they realize Im taking hormones. Not that that is actually happening yet bc my insurance is fucking me over#the pharmacy keeps pushing back the date for getting my t (should have had it 3 weeks ago. did not happen.) and I might end up having to pa#nearly Two Hundred Dollars for i dont even know how much of a supply bc of the fucked insurance thing.#And I cant even talk to my therapist about any of this bc my old schedule wont work anymore but I cant get in touch with the office to#see what other openings they may have. and some of the weird nebulous resentment-inducing stuff with my old friends is coming back bc#I hung out with one of them recently and it somehow it Still hurts like a fresh wound despite how often I tell myself Im resigned to being#treated the way I am. I barely have time to spend with the friends I do still have pleasant relationships with so I cant even talk through#any of it like that. and to round it all off my dysphoria has gotten so agonizing of late bc i finally had hope i would be on hrt#but. gestures at earlier topic. my hopes of that are being quickly and brutally slaughtered so.#its just. like genuinely what is the point of any of it. how is This what my life is supposed to be. I know I dont deserve very much#but surely I havent sinned so terribly as to earn misery like this.#and I'm not even strong enough of will to *** about it. pathetic really#I just want one day to feel even neutral abt being alive without having my feet swept from under me by some new unbearable Thing developmen
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i don't feel like looking for it rn bcus of the mood i find myself in but i need to like. tattoo that post about wishing your mind would be kinder to you and then remembering that you have to do that on my fucking eyelids.
#little rock.txt#venting#it's not even. specific. i've just been in kind of a shitty mood for a few days#like i thought i knew what had triggered it so i walked myself through some thoughts on that#but i'm still just. vaguely pissed off all the time.#i don't feel particularly motivated to write the important things or talk or draw or do fuck all#like i Have done stuff. i did my laundry bcus i have work and if i didn't get a clean bra together my chest dysphoria was going to get Bad#but i've stayed up until 7-8 a.m. and woken up at 2 p.m. both of my days off#i'm supposed to be helping plan a pathfinder mission and i can't think that hard about fucking anything#i'm just tired and angry and trying to keep up appearances bcus i don't want to be tired or angry anymore#but sleeping and trying to nurse myself through my feelings don't Work bcus i'm Not Good At Them Yet#i know people love me and i'm trying so fucking hard to love myself too bcus i don't want to let them down#anyway. sorry. rant over. if you live with me uuuhh sorry i've been like this the last few days. i don't. super want to talk about it.#i need to call my doctors is what i need to fucking do but i'm gonna try to do that after work
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#my posts#...........................................................................................................................................#............................................................................................................................................#is that enough i think that's enough#yeah that's how its going#everything's been getting worse and I've been feeling very bad but also very pathetic and like complaining almost makes me feel worse but#i can't do anything else about this so like. vent post lmao bc I'm a dumbass#i truly just want to(redacted)but one of those isn't an option and the other i have a drs appointment soon and i don't want to explain that#everything is just. bad. and what isn't i feel like it's getting bad and it's my fault. and I'm probably right.#just. i hate it here#the deserving mentality is truly getting to me and i fucking hate it. it's not logical. I'll still agree with it.#i truly don't deserve the food stuff i can't keep in my life and i deserve the shit that in getting and i can't stop agreeing with that#'oh this classmate wants to have lunch with me on Saturday after working on something! i should cancel before it's too late-#-so i can continue feeling bad for being an apple bc people should hate me bc I'm horrible and don't deserve kindness' like#it's. it's false. it's not logical. and yet#everyone else there's the fucking plexiglass wall and where it wasn't i think it's getting formed and it is my fault probably#i am annoying that one is true#.... I've been making posts like this all day and deleting them bc I'm pathetic also. it's.#... there's a little too much going on lmao#nothing's worth it and i feel like shit and anything i could try to do about it doesn't work and I'm just tired#... in case someone does read this i know it sounds worrying but nothing will happen tbh I'm just a pathetic coward who's sad and tired#and tired of being sad in a way that feels like it's getting worse#I'm not very sure when was the last time i felt. this bad in just. i don't know how to make it stop lmao#also in already annoying so this is all i can do i think lmao#i think I'm seeing now I'm just. being redundant and if i keep this up too much i will delete this. and i should but. i don't think i will#also without saying much this year the one thing™ has been worse than usual and that's not helping either so it truly is just.#that everything is kinda very bad#.... yeah. whatever. it's just.¯\_(ツ)_/¯#... i truly wish killing myself was still an option like when i was a teen bit it's not so i just have to deal with whatever this is#... i hate being aware this is all super illogical bc the logical post of my brain teams up making me feel worse somehow.
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youtube
#diana's music diary#🌨️#okay I actually do feel better now#good morning :3#sleep is the cure to all#yesterday I spent the day helping my partner set up her DAW so she could stream with it#and then also set up a cobblemon mod pack for us 😊#it's not actually done yet but it's pretty much there#just needs some finishing touches#will maybe skim it a little today too idk#there are probably some unnecessary parts I added yesterday in my hyperfocus so idk#it went surprisingly well and smooth though#feel like I got some things done yesterday which is always nice#sleeping at a reasonable time works? what?#who would have thought......#I'm still having a lot of trouble actually staying asleep actually but it's working either way somehow.. I'm used to being tired so it's ok#thinking about it the only bad part of yesterday was a panic attack near the end and being in pain...#that doesn't sound like a good thing but for me lately especially that's actually good.#let's try to make today fun and cozy and painless...#will make sure to take my pain medicine#if you are reading this I hope your day is good especially too n_n#also on the music... I think I'm on my touhou music shit again... been listening to Koishi music a lot and this one Alice album...
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