#i'm like. idk less shy lately | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

number1jeonginstan · 5 months ago

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A/N: I did my own thing with regard to this request as well as tried a different style of writing. I wanted to implement him being sweet and gentle as he stalked you. But idk if I really did that. This was fun to write though, and my requests are once again open so please send me something. I hope y'all enjoy it so please don't be shy and comment or reblog with your opinions because I would love to hear them - ju <3

wc: 9k (what if I told y'all I wrote this all in less than one day with sleep.)

pairing:morethankinda stalker!Felix x afab!reader

DNI if you are uncomfortable with reader giving in kind of easily. This is meant to be a stalker fic, so if you feel uncomfortable, please do not interact. I made this more dubcon because reader does give her consent, but I do not want to make anyone uncomfortable!

warnings: porn WITH a plot (like 2.5k words of smut...), kinda Stockholm syndrome, oral!fem receiving, unprotected sex, creampie, panty sniffing, edging, idk what else!

“Who orders pineapple juice at a coffee shop?” you giggled looking at Felix as he started making an ice americano for the next customer in line.

"Someone who doesn't want caffeine and enjoys the taste of tropical fruit, I guess."

"Or a weirdo!" you giggled before calling out the drink for Christopher.

He chuckled along with you, enjoying the banter. His eyes watched you closely as you called out the drink, taking in every detail of your movements.

"Hey, weird can be good sometimes. Adds some spice to life, right?"

"Yeah, as long as they aren't creepy. My best friend's ex used to follow her after they broke up, even texting her from new phone numbers" You frowned before working on your next drink.

He nodded, a frown of feigned concern on his face.

In truth, he found himself growing more fascinated with you the more you talked. He only applied for the job to get closer to you.

The first time Felix came into “The View” he saw you smiling ever so brightly, giving this little girl a free cup of hot chocolate. From that moment on, he knew he had to get to know you, no matter the cost.

He bribed the hiring manager with a batch of his homemade brownies. In exchange for a job, he had to make at least one batch a day. He didn’t mind working overtime, as long as he was close to you.

He snapped out of his thoughts, finally responding to you. "That's horrible. No one deserves to be stalked like that. I hope she's doing better now."

"She is, she was really straight with him after the second time, and he stopped which is good, but sometimes I feel like I'm being watched. I don’t know how to explain it, but especially when my shift ends whenever we are working together. Maybe it's just in my head" you sighed before calling out for the next customer.

He tried to act nonchalant, but his mind was racing. Was he that obvious? Was he being too creepy?

"I hope it's just in your head," he said, his voice barely above a whisper, eyes fixated on you as you called out to the next customer, trying to look away before you noticed him practically staring.

"Yeah, me too. Who knows, maybe I'm just being delusional," you sighed, too caught up in your own world, thinking about the late-night fear of constantly being watched. You were so distracted that you didn't even realize you had almost gripped the machine's steam frother with your bare hand.

His eyes widened as he noticed your hand grasping for the frother without a cloth. He quickly reached out to stop you, grabbing your hand gently but firmly, his touch lingering for a moment longer than necessary. "Hey, watch out, you'll burn yourself!"

"Oh shit, thanks Lixie, I don’t know what I would do without you" you muttered, snapping yourself out of it and getting back to the drink at hand.

He held onto your hand for a moment longer, enjoying the feel of your skin. He reluctantly let go and smiled at you, trying to act casual. "Lixie," the nickname rolled off your tongue, making his heart flutter. "No problem, just don't want you hurting yourself, you know?"

"I got it, I was just too in my head. I wish there was someone I could walk home with so I would no longer feel so terrified" you sighed, making sure there were no other orders to be completed before ranting away to Felix.

His heart skipped a beat as you confessed your desire to have someone walk you home. He saw his chance and took it. He pretended to be deep in thought, contemplating something before speaking.

"You know, I don't mind walking you home after our shift ends. If it makes you feel safer."

"You would do that for me?" you asked excitedly, thankful for him.

He nodded quickly, his smile growing wider. He had to control himself not to seem too eager. This is his chance to be closer to you.

"Yeah, of course. I mean, it's the least I can do. I don't want you to be scared walking home alone at night."

"Thank you so much Lixie!" you grinned, watching the way he reciprocated your smile. His freckles shine extra bright.

He chuckled softly as you thanked him, his heart-warming as you called him “Lixie”. He found himself smiling more than usual, enjoying the way the nickname sounded coming from your lips.

"No problem, really. It’ll be nice to have some company on the walk home too”.

"I hope it's not out of your way though, I don't even know where you live" you pouted, unsure if letting him walk you home would cause him too much trouble.

He chuckled, seeing your pout and finding it adorable. He reassured you with a wave of his hand.

"Don't worry about it, it's not out of my way at all. And if it was, I wouldn't mind."

In truth, he was willing to walk the extra mile (literally) to be able to spend a few more moments with you.

"Are you a hundred percent sure?" too scared that you were inconveniencing him due to your paranoia.

He nodded, his expression gentle and sincere as he looked into your eyes.

"I'm absolutely sure. I wouldn't offer if I didn't mean it. I want you to feel safe, and if walking you home is what it takes, then I'm more than happy to do so."

He smiled, feeling a twinge of guilt about his actual motives, but pushing it away. All that mattered to him was being close to you. He took another glance at his watch, noticing that it was almost time to clock out.

"Actually, our shift is almost done. Ready to head out?"

"We have to make a batch of brownies first though?"

You looked at him a bit puzzled, not understanding that it was his eagerness that was causing him to forget all about his obligation. You just chalked it off to him always being a bit forgetful since you became friends with him.

It was a common occurrence, whether it be forgetting to add mocha to a drink or a whole batch of cookies in the oven, Felix always seemed to be just a tad distracted.

He mentally slapped himself for being so caught up in the moment that he forgot about the brownies. He tried to play it cool. "Right right, I almost forgot about that."

He chuckled sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "We do that first, then close shop."

"Let's get to it then!" you giggled, walking to the front and locking it, turning over the kitten 'Open!' sign that your manager Lee Know had bought before rushing back towards him following him into the cafe's kitchen.

He followed you into the kitchen, his heart fluttering as he listened to your giggles. Once in the kitchen, he quickly gathered the ingredients for the brownies, setting them on the workbench.

"Okay, I'll start getting everything measured. Can you preheat the oven?"

“You got it Lix!” you replied back, quickly preheating the oven to 350.

He smiled at your reply, feeling more and more relaxed in your presence. As he started measuring out the ingredients, he occasionally glanced at you, watching as you preheated the oven. He found himself mesmerized by your every little movement.

"Isn't that too much chocolate Lix?" you asked looking at the bowl that he usually double-broiled the chocolate in.

He glanced down at the bowl, realizing he had indeed put in almost too much chocolate.

"Oh, right... maybe I got a bit carried away there." He chuckled sheepishly, a slight blush creeping up on his cheeks as he began to measure out a more appropriate amount of chocolate.

"I mean you can never have too much chocolate!" you grinned before eating the excess piece he had taken out, popping it into your mouth.

He couldn't help but laugh when you ate the excess piece of chocolate, finding your antics adorable. His eyes lingered on your lips as you popped it into your mouth, silently wishing he could be the one feeding you the chocolate.

"You're right, but we still need some chocolate left for the brownies," he joked, his smile widening.

With a playful nudge, he continued measuring the correct amount of chocolate, his gaze flicking back to you.

"But hey, maybe I could save a few extra pieces for us for some late-night chocolate indulgence, just between you and me."

"I like the way you think Lee Felix"

You fed him a piece whilst taking another one for yourself, savoring the sweet taste of Hershey’s chocolate. Since you’ve begun helping him bake his brownies, he’s always been adamant about only using Hershey.

His heart skipped a beat as you fed him the piece of chocolate, the sweetness of it almost as sweet as the feeling of your touch. He felt a warm rush of pleasure run through him as he took the chocolate from your hand, his eyes never leaving yours.

"I do have some good ideas every now and then," he replied, his voice soft and a hint of a cheeky smile playing on his lips.

You continued to help Felix with both the measuring and mixing, not trusting the stand mixer seeing as you didn't want to incorporate too much gluten into the brownies themselves. The two of you laughed away as you finished mixing and pouring the batter into their respective pans.

After the two of you finished pouring the batter into the pans and setting them in the oven, Felix couldn't help but stare at you as you both laughed together about past customers, especially the one who tried to jump over the counter to steal Lix’s brownie recipe.

The sound of your laughter was like music to his ears, and his heart ached with a desire to keep making you laugh like this every day.

"I have to say," he said, his voice slightly hesitant, "making these brownies is always more enjoyable when you're here. You make everything better."

"Wow thanks, Lix, you are always so sweet" You pinched his cheeks admiring how squishy they were.

Felix chuckled at your gesture, feeling his cheeks heat up underneath your pinch. He couldn't help but notice how close you were to him, your touches sending small jolts of electricity through his body.

He then looked away, pretending to busy himself by cleaning up the workstation, his heart still racing from your touch. In reality, all he wanted to do was pull you closer and just hold you, but he knew he had to control himself.

“Let me help you!”

You didn’t want him to do everything himself, especially after he was the one who offered to walk you home, it was the least you could do.

He was touched by your eagerness to help, his heart melting at your thoughtfulness. He wanted to tell you that he didn't mind doing it himself, but the words got stuck in his throat as he looked at your determined expression. Instead, he simply gave you a small smile.

"Alright, if you insist," he said, handing you a cloth to wipe down the counter.

It was a sight he was used to. Every night after the two of you closed shop, you bid him a quick farewell, and he would follow you home. He was always 20 steps behind, his hood covering his face just in case.

Unbeknownst to you, he would watch you through your kitchen window. His eyes fixated on your every move. He knew so many of your habits by now, like the way you used utensils to sing along to whatever was playing in your headphones. Or the way you always drank green tea instead of coffee, letting it steep in your owl mug. He would watch you for hours, no matter the weather, just to get the smallest peak into your life.

He had become a little obsessed, in all honesty. He found himself unable to tear himself away from the view of you going about your day, his heart and mind fully fixated on you. Every time he peered into your kitchen window, he felt a mix of guilt and excitement.

The guilt, of course, came from the fact that he was practically stalking you, but the excitement came from the opportunity to see you again, even if it was from afar.

He hated himself for it, but he couldn’t help it. The need to see you, to be near you was too strong to resist.

“Hey Lixie, I think we are pretty much done, are you ready to go?" you asked, pulling the brownies out of the oven directly putting saran wrap on them, and putting them in the fridge so they could get a thick crackle on them by the time Lee Know was supposed to come in and cut them for the morning rush.

He was abruptly snapped out of his thoughts by the sound of your voice, his eyes snapping up to meet yours. For a moment, he just stared at you, his mind in a daze.

"Uh, right..." he said, trying to compose himself. "Yeah, we're all done. Let's go."

As he watched you put on your jacket, he couldn't help but take in your every movement, his heart rate increasing once again. He felt a strange mix of excitement and nerves as he realized he was actually going to walk you home, something he had been secretly dreaming of for weeks now.

“You ready to lock up?” you asked, your head cocking to the side as you jingled the keys in front of him, ushering him to leave the building.

"Yeah, yeah," he muttered, clearing his throat. "Let's get going."

He reached out and took the keys from your hand, his fingers brushing against yours for a brief moment. It felt like an electric shock running through his body, and he instinctively pulled back, hoping you didn't notice the effect your touch had on him.

The two of you began walking side by side, the silence of the world around you causing you peace. You could no longer feel the lingering eyes that roamed your body as you had for the past few months. Instead, you felt a sense of comfort as you walked beside Felix.

He swallowed hard, his mouth suddenly feeling very dry. He was just so aware of your presence, the subtle scent of your perfume, the way your shoulder occasionally brushed against his...it was driving him crazy. It was too silent for his liking so he urged to start a conversation with you, anything to break the tension.

"Um, so...how's your day been?" he finally managed to ask, wincing inwardly at how lame it sounded.

"Lixie, we had the same day?"

You chuckled at his antics, your own breath stable compared to his harsh breathing as he just blinked at you, unable to process what you had just said.

"Hello? Earth to Lee Yongbok Felix, you alive in there?"

He blinked again, his brain finally catching up with what you had said. He chuckled nervously, feeling a bit embarrassed.

"Right...sorry, I guess I'm just a little tired."

He mentally kicked himself for being so obvious. He couldn't let on how much your presence affected him. He was supposed to act cool and casual like nothing was going on inside his head. But he was finding it increasingly difficult to do so with every step he took next to you.

"That's your apartment isn't it?" he asked pointing up to your building. The two of you were just a couple hundred feet away from it.

"Yeah, it is, how did you know?" you asked, a confused look on your face.

You had never brought Felix to your apartment, in a matter of fact, the only people who knew where you lived were your parents, a couple of close friends, and Lee Know because it was on your resume.

Felix froze, his heart skipping a beat.

He had let slip that he knew where you lived without realizing it. He mentally cursed himself, trying to think of a quick explanation. He couldn't let you know he had been the one following you home every night. That would be creepy and completely ruin any chance he had with you.

He swallowed hard, forcing a casual laugh. "Oh, uh...I just guessed. Lucky hunch, I guess."

Before you could even respond, the sky darkened and fat raindrops began to fall, drenching both of you. The chill soaked through your clothes, making you shiver. He stood there, stunned by the sudden downpour. Without a second thought, you grabbed his hand, feeling the warmth of his skin against the cold rain. You tugged him urgently, splashing through puddles as you ran towards your apartment building. The sound of rain and hurried footsteps filled the air. Breathless, you pulled him inside, the warmth and dryness a welcome relief from the storm outside.

Felix felt a rush of adrenaline as you grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the building. The sudden rain had caught him off guard, but the feeling of your hand, warm and tight around his, sent a tingle down his spine.

He quickly followed you inside, his heart pounding in his chest. He tried to keep his composure, but being this close to you, holding your hand, was doing all sorts of things to him.

"Here why don't you come up to my apartment, I don't want you to get sick from this weather. You can dry off and we can eat something!"

His heart leaped at your suggestion. The thought of being in your apartment, of being alone with you...it was both exciting and nerve-wracking. But he couldn't say no, not when you were being so kind to him.

He nodded, trying not to let his eagerness show too much. "Are you sure? I don't want to intrude..."

"I really don't mind. Come up and change into some dry clothes, okay? I'll order us something to eat. Are you okay with Thai food?" you asked as the two of you stepped into the elevator.

Both of you were drenched, and a puddle began to form at your feet as you waited to reach your floor.

Felix nodded again, his thoughts racing as he watched the elevator numbers climb. He was going to be in your apartment, alone with you, it was like a dream come true.

"Thai food sounds great," he managed to say, his voice slightly breathless. "I'll eat anything right now, I'm starving."

"I would hope so, you didn't eat anything our entire shift today" you pouted, trying to remember if he even had his daily shaken iced espresso with oat milk that he usually makes twice a shift.

He chuckled at your pout, his heart melting at how cute you looked. He also found it sweet that you kept track of if he had eaten or not. It was one of the many things about you that he loved.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. I was so busy today that I kind of forgot to take a break."

He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, a slight blush creeping up on his cheeks. He didn't want to admit that he had been so distracted thinking about you that he hadn't even thought about eating.

"That's not good Lix, you shouldn't over-exert yourself" you scolded him while trying to find the keys to your apartment.

"I know, I know, I just had a lot on my mind today," he admitted, feeling a little guilty for not taking better care of himself.

You finally found your keys and opened the door, allowing him to step inside. "I'm going to shower real quick, and then you can go after me so you don't catch a cold, okay?"

He nodded, trying to keep his cool as he stepped into your apartment. His heart was racing again as he thought about you being naked and wet only a few feet away.

He cleared his throat, trying to compose himself. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Just don't take too long, or I might get lonely and start raiding your fridge." He joked, trying to hide his inner thoughts.

He chuckled at the sight of the empty fridge, making a mental note to offer to take you grocery shopping sometime. He quickly took your phone from you, looking down at the already-opened delivery app with your part of the order placed.

He watched as you headed towards the bathroom, a lump forming in his throat as he imagined you stripping down and stepping into the shower. The image was burned into his mind, and it took all his self-control to not follow you into the bathroom. Instead, he took a deep breath and looked down at your phone, trying to distract himself.

He glanced at the bathroom door, wondering how long you would be. He was trying not to be impatient, but his mind and body were both eagerly anticipating your return.

You stepped out of the bathroom, steam trailing behind you as you wrapped a towel around your damp hair. Droplets of water trickled down your neck and shoulders, soaking into the fabric of your oversized t-shirt and shorts, making them cling to your skin. The cool air of the room sent a shiver down your spine as you padded softly across the floor toward Felix.

Felix's breath caught in his throat as you emerged from the bathroom, wrapped in a towel and wearing thin, clinging clothes. The sight of you, still slightly wet and rosy from the shower, was almost too much for him to handle. His eyes raked over your body, taking in every inch of damp skin, and his heart skipped several beats.

He managed to tear his gaze away from you and tried to act casual, but he couldn't help the way his body reacted to your presence. He swallowed hard, trying to control the ache in his jeans.

"Hey, Lix," you said softly, your voice carrying a hint of warmth. "The bathroom is free, so please go ahead and shower. Just hand me your clothes so I can dry them for you, okay?"

"I also left an extra pair of clothes and a towel in the bathroom so it's easier for you"

He quickly stood up, trying to adjust his jeans again and hide his arousal. He picked up his wet clothes from the floor and walked towards the bathroom.

"Thanks," he said, his voice a little huskier than usual. "I won't be too long."

He entered the bathroom and closed the door, locking it behind him. He leaned against the door, taking a deep breath to try and calm his nerves and the growing tension in his body.

He slowly stripped off his damp clothes, tossing them towards the door. He couldn't help but glance at the pile of clothes, imagining you taking them off of your body. He quickly picked up your shirt, smelling your scent on it, and the thought made him shiver.

Felix's heart nearly stopped when he saw the pair of black lace panties lying on the floor. His eyes widened and he quickly looked away, his heart rate immediately increasing.

Before he could stop himself, he picked them up and brought them closer to his face, taking in the scent of your laundry detergent essence on the fabric.

His cock hardened at the thought of you wearing them, your pussy pressing and rubbing against them as the two of you worked the entire day.

He let out a groan before slowly wrapping the fabric around his leaking cock. What you didn’t know wouldn’t hurt you right? It’s not like he was purposely doing it, it was just right there for his convenience.

He muffled his moans as he pumped his cock with your underwear, trying to be as quiet as possible as the water ran in the background. His only thought was you.

You when you wore those cute little dresses. You. When you always bent over to get things from the fridge for him knowing how much his back ached. You. who helped him embrace his freckles. You, who was in this bathroom mere minutes before him, fully naked.

With that he came with a groan, quickly hopping into the shower to ride out his high under the steaming hot water, cleaning your underwear of any evidence of infidelity while he was at it.

He grabbed the soap and began to run it over his body, scrubbing away the layers of dirt and sweat, and the shame of him cumming on your pretty little panties, only further intoxicated him with your scent.

He hadn’t realized how much time had passed until you knocked on the door to the bathroom.

"Felix?"

He heard your voice calling out to him, breaking the spell. He quickly threw the lace into his pile of clothes and turned off the water, wrapping a towel around his waist.

"Yeah?" he called out, his voice a bit shaky. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, the food just here so I was wondering if you were finished washing up?"

He took a quick breath, trying to compose himself.

"Yeah, I'm just about done. I'll be out in a minute."

He stepped out of the bathroom, his hair still damp and water droplets running down his chest and arms. He tried to ignore the way your eyes lingered on his bare skin, pretending not to notice the slight flush that was creeping up your neck.

"I'm so sorry, I had no idea I forgot to leave clothes for you in the bathroom" you whispered, your cheeks reddened.

You quickly handed them to him before scurrying out of your room.

Felix chuckled as you handed him the clothes, his heart warming at your flustered state. He found it endearing how shy you were about accidentally forgetting to leave him clothes to change into. He tried to ignore the way his body reacted to the sight of you blushing and flustered, his towel becoming uncomfortably tight for a brief moment.

He quickly dressed in the clothes you had given him, trying his best not to focus on the fact that they smelled like you. The baggy t-shirt was comfortable, but the way it clung to his damp skin and hair made him feel even more on edge.

He took another deep breath and opened the bathroom door, stepping back into the living room where you were setting down plates and chopsticks.

"So, what's for dinner?" he asked, feigning nonchalance and hoping you wouldn't notice the small bulge in his sweatpants.

You held up the two takeout containers, "well I ordered drunken noodles, and I kind of forgot what you did. We can always share!"

Felix chuckled again, feeling relieved that you hadn't noticed his current...situation. He tried to keep his mind off the way your shirt dipped low enough to show off your collarbones, and the way your shorts rode up slightly on your thighs. He shook his head slightly, trying to clear his thoughts and focus on the food.

"Sounds good to me," he said, rubbing his stomach. "I'm starving."

He walked over to the couch, sat down, and tried to keep his pose casual. He glanced over at you, noticing how your hair was still damp and your cheeks were still slightly pink. The sight made his heart rate speed up again, and he tried to distract himself by looking down at the food.

He grabbed a pair of chopsticks and started digging into the noodles, trying to act like everything was normal. But as he watched you eat, he couldn't help but let his mind wander to dirty thoughts. He could see your lips wrapped around the utensils, the way your tongue would flick out to catch any stray noodle…

“You okay Lixie?” you asked, looking up at him as you ate more of your food. Your cheeks are slightly full causing him to choke on his own dish.

He swallowed hard, trying to keep his composure. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," he said, his voice a little strained. "Just...hungry, you know?"

A while passed like this, the silence of the room only occasionally broken up by small talk. The both of you were too infatuated in your food to even register what else was happening.

"Do you want me to wash up your plate?" you asked, getting up from the cushion you were on.

Felix's eyes followed you as you got up, watching the way your shirt rode up even more, revealing more of your smooth, soft skin.

He had to bite his lip to keep from groaning, his body responding even more to the sight of you moving around, so close and yet so out of reach.

He quickly cleared his throat and looked away, trying to compose himself. "Uh, yeah, sure," he managed to say, his voice a little hoarse.

"So you aren't going to have your nightly cup of green tea" he asked as you began cleaning up your table and walking over to your kitchen.

You looked at him startled, your eyes going wide. "How did you know about that?"

Felix chuckled, feeling a wave of affection for you wash over him. He knew you too well to not know about your obsession with green tea.

"Let's just say I pay closer attention to your habits than you think," he said with a sly smile. "You have a cup of tea every night before bed, like clockwork. It's almost endearing how predictable you are."

"Felix, I've never had green tea at work, the only time I do is when I get home, how did you know what I drink before I go to bed" you asked, worry ridden on your face as you began to look around your kitchen for anything to protect you.

Felix's smile faded as he noticed the look of worry on your face, and he realized his poor choice of words.

"Hey, hey, calm down," he said, holding his hands up in a placating gesture. "It was just a guess, I swear. I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's not just a guess" you screamed. That's when it clicked, he was the one who had been watching you every night.

The only time you were followed was after your shift with him. He knew exactly what apartment you lived in. It wasn't just a "lucky guess" as he said. He knew everything.

Felix's heart dropped as he realized the extent of his slip-up. You had figured out that he had been watching you, and now you were scared and confused.

"Listen, please...let me explain," he pleaded, standing up from the couch. "I can explain everything, just please give me a chance to speak."

"No, I don't want an explanation, I need you to get the fuck out" you screamed, curling into a corner in your kitchen, your body shook as you began to speak up again.

"Why are you doing this to me, I thought we were friends" you whined, tears streaming down your face.

Felix's heart broke as he saw the fear and sadness in your eyes. He took a step closer to you but stopped when you shrunk further into the corner, clearly terrified of him.

"I know, I know, but please, just listen to me," he begged, his voice cracking. "I never wanted to hurt you, I swear. I just...I care about you. I care too much. And I thought...I thought I could prevent something bad from happening if I just kept an eye on you."

"How were you helping? You were the one who was causing everything" you continued to sob.

He wanted to deny your accusations, but he knew he couldn't. He had been the one stalking you, following you home every night and watching you from afar.

He had justified it to himself, telling himself it was for your own good, but now that you knew the truth, he could see how creepy and wrong it was.

He took a deep breath and looked you in the eye, his voice quiet and shaky. "You're right. I was the one causing everything."

He took a tentative step closer to you but stopped again when he saw the look of fear flash in your eyes.

"But I...I never meant to scare you," he said, his own eyes tearing up.

"I just...I just couldn't stand the thought of something happening to you, and I thought if I just kept a constant eye on you, I could prevent it."

"Protect me how!" you screamed, "why would you do this to me?" you continued to sob.

"I just wanted to make you feel good sweetheart" he whispered, bending down to capture your face in his hand, brushing away your tears.

He brought down his lips towards your before kissing you, the taste of your tears infiltrating his mouth as you attempted to push him away.

He could feel you trying to push him away, but he just held on tighter, refusing to let you go. He knew he didn't deserve to kiss you, not after everything he had done, but he couldn't stop himself. He needed to feel your lips on his, even if just for a moment.

"Please sweetheart, want to make you feel good. Won't you be a good baby and take it?" he grinned, watching the way your lips puffed out from him ever so slightly nibbling on it. Your tears streaking your flushed red cheeks. You looked at him meekly before nodding, taking your hand in his, not understanding how he had such an effect on you.

Felix chuckled as you nodded, his heart swelling with a twisted mix of emotions, and he pulled you closer to him, wrapping his arms around your waist as he claimed your mouth in a deep kiss. His tongue slipped past your lips, tasting the salty tears that still lingered on them.

“Such a good girl for me” he muttered into your lips.

He pushed you backward until your back hit the wall, pinning you against it with his body. He broke the kiss for a moment to look into your eyes, his own eyes darkened with a possessive lust.

"You're mine, you know that right?" he asked, his voice low and hoarse. "You belong to me and only me."

You whined as he continued to caress your face.

Felix chuckled again as you whined and leaned into his touch, the sound of your needy whines only fueling his desire for you. He leaned in and whispered in your ear, his breath hot against your skin,

"That's right, sweetheart. You're mine, and I'm never letting go. You're going to do everything I say, and you're going to love every second of it."

He nipped at your earlobe, his hands roaming your body, feeling the soft skin of your back through your shirt.

"And if you're a good girl for me, I'll give you everything you've ever dreamed of," he murmured, his lips trailing down your neck, leaving a trail of kisses and bite marks in his wake.

"Lixie" you whined as he continued to nibble at your skin.

Felix chuckled at your whine, his heart fluttering at the sound of his nickname on your lips. He continued to kiss and bite at your skin, marking you as his, his hands gripping your hips possessively.

“All needy and desperate," he whispered, his voice low and hoarse. "It makes me want to do all sorts of things to you."

You grasped his hand and led him to your room, your senses overwhelmed by his embrace, feeling his warmth as he held you close.

Felix followed you obediently, his grip on your hand tight as he allowed you to lead him into your room. His heart was racing with desire and excitement, his mind consumed with thoughts of all the things he wanted to do to you.

"So obedient," he murmured, his voice filled with praise as he pressed up behind you once you reached the edge of your bed.

He wrapped his arms around you from behind, his chest pressed against your back as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. He inhaled deeply, breathing in your scent as his hands roamed your body.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to have you like this," he whispered in your ear, his voice thick with desire.

"Really?" you asked, feeling his embrace tighten as he pressed closer.

Felix hummed in response, his lips trailing kisses along your neck as he held you close. "Yeah, sweetheart," he murmured between kisses, his hands slipping under your shirt to feel your soft skin.

"For as long as I can remember, I've craved having you like this, all to myself. It's driving me insane with how badly I want you."

"Is that why you kept watching me?" you asked, turning around to face him, your hand clutching his face, tracing every freckle as he began to speak.

"Yeah," he admitted, his voice low and hoarse. "That's why. I couldn't resist the urge to watch you, to know every move you made, to make sure you were safe."

"I couldn't stop myself from wanting to keep you close. I needed to feel like I had some control over your life, and watching you was the only way I could do that."

"That's not normal though Lixie"

"I know," he admitted, his voice quiet. "I know it's not normal, and I'm sorry. But...but I just...I just couldn't stop myself. I care about you too much."

"Then show me, please," you whispered, kissing his cheek and trailing down to his soft, plump lips.

Felix's heart skipped a beat as you kissed his cheek and then his lips, your whine sending a shiver down his spine. He responded eagerly to your kiss, closing his eyes and savoring the feel of your lips on his. But then he pulled away, a determined look in his eyes.

"Sweetheart, I can show you, but first you have to promise me something," he said, his voice low and commanding.

"Anything" you whimpered, feeling yourself growing wetter at every passing moment that he wasn't next to you, his touch not being pressed against you

"Promise me that you're mine. Promise me that you belong to me and no one else," he whined as he cupped your cheek, pulling you closer to his face.

"I promise" you whispered back before kissing him feverishly.

"Good girl," he murmured, his voice thick with desire. "You’re all mine now, sweetheart."

Before you could even respond, he pushed you onto the bed, his body following soon after as he settled on top of you. His hands moved under your shirt, his fingers tracing the bare skin of your stomach.

He began to leave a trail of kisses down your neck, stopping to bite and suck at the spot where your shoulder met your neck. He wanted to mark you, to claim you as his own.

"You have no idea how long I've been waiting for this," he murmured against your skin, his hands continuing to roam your body.

"How long Lixie?" you whimpered as he began to pull off your shirt. He took in the sight of your bare skin, biting his lip as he straddled you, his thighs shutting yours closed as he began to kiss up and down your neck.

"So long" he murmured between kisses. "For years, I've been waiting for this. Wanting you, aching for you."

"Want you too" you whined as you pulled off his shirt, your hands roaming up and down his chiseled chest, watching the way his body clenched slightly as you ran your finger along his abs.

He leaned down and captured your lips in a deep kiss, his tongue dipping into your mouth as he pulled you closer to him, his hands roaming your body once again.

"You have no idea what you do to me," he panted, breaking the kiss for a moment before attacking you once again, your lips pressing against one another feverishly.

You gazed at him, noting his ragged breath. "Then show me," you whimpered as his hands began to caress your thighs.

"I'll show you just how much I desire you, just how much I need you."

He began to kiss and bite at your thighs, his lips and teeth leaving a trail of marks on your skin. He wanted to make sure that you would remember this moment, that you would remember who you belonged to.

He murmured against your skin, his lips trailing kisses up your inner thigh. "Every part of you is mine."

“Yours” you whimpered as he continued to abuse you everywhere but the one place you needed him.

He loved how needy you were for him, your body begging for his touch. He moved his lips closer to where you needed him, his breath hot against your skin.

Felix's eyebrows raised in surprise and excitement as he pulled off your shorts, his breath catching in his throat as he saw that you weren't wearing any panties. You were so wet it began to drip down to your thighs.

"You're full of surprises, aren't you baby?" he said, his voice thick with desire. "And here I thought you were a good girl."

He slowly licked a stripe up your cunt, savoring the taste that he couldn’t quite get off your panties.

“And you taste so good too, could eat you for hours” he moaned before diving back in, his fingers opening up your pretty little cunt for him, allowing him to nip at your clit.

“Fuck Lix!” you whined above him, your hand finding his hair, intertwining your fingers between it, pushing him deeper into your pretty little pussy.

He slowly removed his mouth from your cunt, your essence covering the bottom half of his face. “You are going to take what I give you or else you aren’t gonna get anything” he grinned before shoving himself back into you, letting his tongue flick out, swiping across your sensitive flesh, eliciting a gasp from your lips.

He continued to lick and taste you, his hands gripping your thighs to keep you still as you writhed and whimpered beneath him. He loved the way you tasted.

“So sweet baby, sweetest thing I’ve ever tasted” he muttered into your poor cunt as he began to push his finger inside of you, stretching out your whole.

“Lixie, it feels so good” you whined as he continued to lap at you, savoring each and every moan and whine that escaped your pretty little lips.

He continued to tease you, his tongue and lips bringing you closer and closer to the edge, but never quite pushing you over. He could feel how close you were, how your body trembled beneath him.

"You want to come, don't you, my sweet girl?" he whispered, his breath hot against your sensitive skin. "But I'm not going to let you. Not yet."

"Why!" you whined underneath him, bucking your hips up to get any sort of stimulation.

He placed his hands on your hips, holding you down with a firm grip, preventing you from bucking against him

"Because I want you to wait for me to fuck you, baby," he murmured, his mouth moving to the other thigh, leaving a trail of love bites in its wake. "I want you to be desperate for me, aching for me. I want to ruin you completely."

His tongue continued to tease you, his lips leaving a trail of kisses up your inner thigh, his teeth nipping at your skin as he went.

"I want you to be so desperate for release that you'll do anything I ask," he whispered, his breath hot against your skin. “And only when you truly beg for me will I finally give you my cock” he chuckled against your cunt.

"Please Lixie, need you in me, can't do this anymore" you whined, your chest heaving and tears began to stream out of your eyes. He had been edging you for so long, pulling away as soon as he felt you were close to your high. His fingers that were previously thrusting in you stopped completely, his soaked face only rising to laugh at your pathetic face.

"Oh sweetheart, you're so cute when you beg," he said, his voice low and hoarse. "But I don't think you've earned it yet."

"Please, I've been such a good girl for you Lixie, please let me cum, or at least fuck me" you whimpered "I'll do anything, anything you ask me, just please let me cum" you whined, tears falling out faster as your entire body shook from the multiple orgasms that were ripped away from you ever so easily under his grasp.

Felix's eyes darkened at your words, his body responding to your desperate pleas. He loved seeing you like this, so needy and pathetic, begging for him to give you what you so desperately needed. He knew he had complete control over you, and he loved every second of it.

"Anything, sweetheart?" he asked, his voice low and rough. "You'll do anything I ask, no matter what?"

"Yes Lix, anything, just fuck me already!" you screamed.

He leaned down, his body pressing against yours as he spoke into your ear, his breath hot against your skin.

“Since you’ve been such a good girl, maybe I should give it to you”

You simply nodded your head up and down as fast as you physically possible, showing you truly how eager you were for him.

He laughed at how desperate you were for him, pulling down his boxers, allowing his extremely hard cock to slap his stomach, the tip red and angry already leaking pre-cum.

It took all his might to not cum in his boxers at the taste of you.

“Please Lixie, need your cock inside of me” you whined, spreading your legs open for him, allowing him to see how your hole pulsed at just the sight of him standing there, his hard cock slapped against his stomach.

Felix's eyes darkened even more at your words, his breathing ragged with desire. He was losing control, his own need for you becoming almost too much to resist fucking you.

He slowly bent down, positioning himself between your legs, his hands pinning your hips to the bed to keep you still. He looked down at you, his eyes dark and possessive.

With that, he pushed inside you, a guttural moan escaping his lips at the feeling of your hot tight cunt wrapping around his length.

You moaned underneath him, his body pressing against yours as you got used to his sheer size inside of you.

He buried himself deep within you, filling you completely, his hands continuing to roam around your body. He needed to touch you, to make sure that his fantasy were real.

He had spent nights jerking off to the thought of you begging for his cock, whimpering for him, and it took all his strength to cum right there and then at the sight of your eyes pressed together, your mouth hung open as he began to thrust inside of you.

He began to move, his thrusts rough and desperate, his breathing ragged and shallow. He needed you, needed to possess you and claim you completely.

“Feels so good Lix”

You kept babbling at the feeling of him inside of you. The only thought on your mind was him.

“Lix, Lix, Lix” you kept muttering, drool slowly escaping past your lips.

"You're mine, sweetheart," he repeated, his voice low and rough in your ear. "No one else is ever going to make you feel this way again. Only me. You're mine."

“Only yours” you whimpered out.

"That's right, sweetheart," he growled, his hips picking up speed. "You're mine and mine alone. No one else will ever touch you, have you, own you. Only me."

He slowly pulled his hand down to where you needed him most, playing with your clit as he continued his brutal pace inside of you.

"That's right, sweetheart," he growled, his hips picking up speed. "You're mine and mine alone. No one else will ever touch you, have you, own you. Only me."

He buried his face in your neck, his teeth and tongue leaving marks and bites as he continued his relentless pace, his breathing ragged and uneven.

"I won't let anyone else have you," he whispered in your ear, his lips nipping at your skin. " I'll make sure of that. You're mine, forever. No one else will ever know you the way I do. No one else will ever be able to make you feel the way I can."

His hands roamed your body as he continued to claim you, his lips and teeth marking your skin, his hips never ceasing in their relentless pace.

Every time you called out his name, every whimper and moan that escaped your lips, only served to drive him deeper into his primal need for you.

He pulled back slightly, his eyes locking with yours. He wanted to see your face, to see the way you looked at him in this moment, completely lost in the pleasure and ecstasy he was giving you.

“Aren’t you a good girl for me?” he asked, slightly slapping your cheek to get a response

“Yes!” you screamed as he began to push your legs back, his cock pressing deeper inside of you, hitting your g-spot every time he rutted his hips inside of you.

“Gonna cum” you moaned as he continued his brutal pace.

“Yeah, baby? Gonna cum for me? Gonna cum all over my cock like a good girl?” he growled into your ear, chasing his own high.

His hips continued to slam into you, his breathing ragged and wild. He couldn't get enough of you, couldn't get close enough. He needed you, needed to claim every part of you as his own.

Felix growled low in his throat as you screamed that you were close to cumming. The sound of your ecstasy only fueled his own need and desire for you. He wanted to bring you to the edge, to make you lose all control beneath him.

"Not yet," he growled in your ear. "You're not coming without me."

His lips moved back to your neck, kissing and biting their way down to your collarbone. His hips began to move faster, his breathing becoming more ragged as he continued to drive you towards the edge of ecstasy.

"You're so close, aren't you?" he whispered in your ear, his voice thick with desire. "I can feel it. I can feel how close you are for me. Your walls are clenching around me like a fucking vice, but you're not going to come yet, not until I say so." his pace is relentless and unceasing.

You continued to moan his name, like a fucking chant and he couldn't resist your desperate plea any longer. He could see how close you were to your release, how your body was tense and trembling beneath him. He loved seeing you so desperate for him.

"Come for me. Let go, sweetheart. Let me hear you cry out my name."

“Felix!” you screamed one last time before letting go.

He continued to move his hips through your climax, his body trembling and shaking with the effort. His pace became more irregular and erratic as he approached his own release. He could feel himself nearing the edge, could feel the pressure building within him.

"Sweetheart," he gasped, his voice thick with need and desire. "I'm...I'm going to come. I can't hold on much longer."

“Come inside, please come inside of me” you whined, your body becoming more and more overstimulated as he continued to rut into you. It was easy to reach your second orgasm, your walls clenching around his cock as Felix could feel his control slipping. His body was wracked with tremors and shivers as he neared his release. Your words only drove him closer to the edge, his body responding to your plea without hesitation.

"Yes," he gasped, his voice barely more than a guttural moan.

His hips slammed into you with one final, rough thrust, his release crashing over him like a wave. He groaned your name, his arms wrapping around you tightly to keep you close as he lost himself in the ecstasy of his climax. He buried his face in your neck, his breath hot and ragged against your skin.

“So baby, how about some green tea?” he giggled, pulling your body into him.

“Just wanna stay like this” you whined as he kissed the top of your head, covering the two of you with the blanket.

"You're mine," he whispered again, his voice thick with emotion. "All mine. No one else gets to have you, no one else gets to touch you, no one else gets to know you the way I do. You're mine, and I'm never letting you go."

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mysecretlittlelibrary · 1 year ago

Text

After The End

Pairing: Bucky x Reader/former Steve x Reader

Word Count: 3.2k

Warnings: idk... there's lots of arguing and resentment

Genre: mostly angst some fluff here and there

Summary: It took you ages to put yourself back together when Steve chose to stay in the 40s, what happens when he comes back two years after

***

Life after Thanos was hard. Watching some of your closest friends disappear was not something you would ever be able to forget. Especially with those of you that were left scattered around trying to patch up what could be saved. Those five years were hard, but harder still was having almost everyone you loved return only to lose others. If you had known that beating Thanos would mean losing your boyfriend you might not have tried so hard. It's selfish to think that way, you know it is but you had a whole life planned with Steve, and being heroes you knew there was a chance you wouldn't get to see it through but losing him like this was- almost too much to bare. All he had to do was return the stupid stones to where you'd gotten them from to save the universe. It was supposed to be simple and there was something soul shattering about him choosing not to return to the team, to you. He took the stones back and then he stayed. Chose a life with Peggy that was never his rather than the life with you that he already had. It was agony, for months you were heartbroken. But you got through it. You mourned that life you envisioned, you mourned him, and while you'll probably always love him, you refused to let his choice destroy you. And you considered yourself lucky because Bucky was there for you through it all. On nights that were really bad, Bucky would stay with you even if you were up all night.

You aren't entirely sure when it happened, even now, looking back on it you can't pinpoint the moment late night conversations and afternoons completing chores became... more than that. You guess in spending so much time together you started to see Bucky in a different light. You'd always cared for him but what happened with Steve seems to have created a level of closeness you didn't expect. That first night that you kissed him was unexpected even to you. You'd been talking about nothing of consequence, he was lying on the floor of your room while you were in your bed, both of you staring at your ceiling for the most part. There was a lull in the conversation so you said the thing that had only clicked for you the week before at that point.

"I can't believe I let myself feel inadequate for so long." You sighed. You'd convinced yourself, for weeks, that Steve leaving was because you weren't enough, and only now were you coming to your senses about it.

"I'm sorry." Bucky had whispered it so quietly you almost thought he wasn't talking to you.

"You're sorry? For what? You didn't make him leave." You scoffed at him.

"For letting you feel less than perfect."

"Come on Buck, that's not on you." You'd rotated onto your stomach with a chuckle at his words. He'd cracked one eye open to look at you when he realized you were staring at him. Before you let yourself think about it too hard, you had leaned over the edge of your bed and kissed Bucky. It was quick and a bit awkward because of the angle but you made sure not to shy away from his surprised stare after.

"Did you just-" Bucky didn't even finish the question.

"Yeah. I guess I did." You'd smiled slowly watching a slight pink warm Bucky's cheeks.

You wish you could simply say 'and the rest is history' but that makes it seem like things were way easier than they were. It wasn't a smooth transition by any means. That night neither of you spoke for far too long, and when you could muster up something to say it wasn't to address the rapidly growing elephant in the room- it was to dispell the tension. You and Bucky spent two weeks dancing around the subject before he finally asked you if you were even ready for another relationship after Steve. That's when it clicked, why he'd been avoiding it in the first place, he was considering the possibility you were rebounding. Understandable concern but nope. It had been months, almost a year actually, since Steven had left. You knew you were in a place to begin again and you wanted to do it with Bucky.

Now the rest is history. You've been together ever since. About a year and a half at this point and you can't remember the last time you were this happy. The two of you meshed so well you can't believe there was a time you thought your future was with another man. You smile to yourself as you think about it while working on a painting. There's a knock at the front door that you almost don't hear.

"Y/n can you get the door? I'm in the bathroom!" Bucky shouts.

"Oh shit, of course!" You put down your brush and head to the door. You can't describe the shock that gripped you when you open the door.

"Steven." You blink at him.

"Hey. Nat- told me you'd moved. Luckily she uh, had your new address so-" He trails off with a shrug.

"Look not to- sound rude or anything, like I'm glad to see you, I think but, what are you doing here?" You ask.

"I thought- I thought I knew what I wanted but I got it wrong. I got it so wrong. My life- my happiness, it's here. With you." Steve steps towards you and you instinctively step back, placing a hand up gently to indicate your boundary.

"Hang on a second Steve. Just because your plan didn't work out doesn't mean you can just waltz back into my life like nothing's changed."

"Y/n! Who's at the door?" Bucky's voice calls from inside.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you." You call back.

"I- didn't realize you'd have company." Steve mutters.

"Oh I don't. That's-" Before you can explain, Bucky's asking something, now walking over to join you at the front door.

"So who's this unbelievable surprise guest of-" Bucky's hands drop from where they were just about to settle on your waist when he finally glances out your door. "Steve." He says stepping back.

"Told you, you wouldn't believe me." You toss over your shoulder.

"Hey pal. Long time no see." Steve says. You can't tell if he's totally put it together yet but the strain in his voice tells you he at least knows something's changed between you and his best friend.

"I'll say. What happened to growing old with Carter?" Bucky asks, stepping around you to half hug Steve and offer a shoulder pat.

"I realized that- wasn't the life I wanted. I mean it was once upon a time but, not anymore. Things have changed." Steve shrugs.

"I see." Bucky nods.

"Well, Steve you're welcome to stay here with us while you- get back on your feet in the 21st century! Right Buck? Or I can send you over to Sam, he's back in Louisiana with family right now but I'm sure he'd love to see you too." You say.

"Oh, yeah, we can set him up in the extra room although- your art stuff is in there, did you want me to move it into my office or should I put it in your room?" Bucky hums.

"Do you have space in your office? Cuz I definitely can set it up in my room-"

"There's tons of space in my office." Bucky shrugs before you can finish. Steve clears his throat and you turn your attention back to him.

"Sorry to interrupt your- logistical discussion about all this, I j- I didn't realize you two were living together." Steve says.

"It's been two years. Like you said, things have changed." You say.

"You haven't told him?" Bucky looks at you.

"Well in my defense I was about to when you walked over here and the conversation kinda pivoted." You say.

"Okay well, do you want to do it or should I?" Bucky asks.

"I mean I don't want to but- it should be me, yeah." You mutter.

"Okay, can we stop doing this sidebar thing you guys are doing? Tell me- what exactly?" Steve asks. Bucky's hand settles comfortingly against your back, it's out of Steve's line of sight and you appreciate it greatly.

"Bucky- Bucky's my partner." You say.

"In the- you go on missions together sense or the 'my girlfriend is dating my best friend' sense?" Steve asks.

"It's been two years Steve-"

"So you replace me with my closest friend?"

"No. I moved on and yeah it was with Bucky but that was by chance it wasn't about you at all. Don't make it personal."

"You just happen to move on with my best bud? It feels pretty personal." He scoffs.

"Okay! Let's settle down. Steve, if you're gonna take our offer to stay I will show you to your room. Nat has some of your things at her place, the rest of it is in a storage unit. I'll take you down after." Bucky interrupts the would-be argument by changing the subject. You step out of the doorway to let Steve walk in as Bucky tugs him along.

"Why are my things at Nat's?" Steve asks.

"Well some of the more valuable things y/n held onto for a while but when she didn't want to keep them around here anymore we gave them to Nat to look after until we came up with a better plan since we didn't wanna leave them in a storage unit we'd barely go to." Bucky explains as the pair walk further into the house. You can't hear Steve's reply as you walk into the kitchen to regroup. Letting him stay here is going to make shit so weird. You sigh to yourself, with any luck he'll get on his feet pretty quickly and this will only last a couple of months. You can do a couple of months.

The first few weeks are, tense. You're not sure if Bucky is as aware of it as you are but your house is awkward and quiet most hours since Steve showed up. It's like most of your routines have been disrupted and you're not sure which ones are best left for after he's gone. Right now you're on your balcony with a cup of tea. When you glance over the ledge, you see Steve trudging into view. You watch curiously to figure out what he's doing, not even realizing Bucky's snuck up behind you until his arms settle around your waist.

"Penny for your thoughts my darling?" Bucky asks.

"Things are weird. Maybe I shouldn't have offered to let him stay here." You frown.

"Don't be silly. You wouldn't be you if you hadn't offered." Bucky chuckles.

"Sure but- now I'm worried I've put us- put you in an uncomfortable situation." Bucky spins you around to face him. His hand comes up to the side of your face, fingers grazing your cheek softly.

"I'm fine. Are you uncomfortable with him being here? Because I can suggest he spend some time checking in with the others if you'd-"

"No, I don't want to kick him out. I just- I don't want you to lose him because of me." You say taking his hand in yours kiss his knuckles.

"If 70 years and Russian brainwashing couldn't destroy our friendship I think we can make it past this." Bucky winks at you. You glance over the balcony again in time to see Steve toss some wood at a growing pile.

"What is he doing? Why is he piling wood?" Your eyebrows scrunch up.

"You can just ask him you know." Bucky muses.

"It's not harming anyone. I don't need to know." You shake your head.

"You wanna ask don't you?"

"It's just strange." You say fighting a smile.

"Just ask." Bucky laughs leaving you to your tea on the balcony. A moment later you let your curiosity get the better of you and lean against the metal railing of the balcony.

"Steve hon, what on earth are you doing?" You ask him.

"A tree fell, so- I'm breaking it down into firewood."

"Stevie it's August, we're not using the fireplace." You shake your head with a laugh.

"Better safe than sorry." He shrugs.

"You must be incredibly bored." You muse.

"No, I just like to be prepared." He says. "Alright, I'm a little bored." He adds with a sigh after a moment.

"Well if you need something to do- I was catching up with Nat the other day, she said a couple of the tenants in her building moved out for whatever reason, you should talk to her about applying." You tell him.

"I'll give her a call." He squints up at you.

"Good." You nod heading back into the apartment. That's honestly the longest conversation you've had since the day he moved in. Usually, you spend all day avoiding him- or he spends all day avoiding you- you're not sure but you don't speak really, except you make a point to ask him about dinner, if he has plans, or if he'd like to join you and Bucky. You're a good host, but you don't talk to each other much. Not that you expect any different, you were together for six years and he up and left but he's back now- and things are not what he thought they'd be. What else could be said honestly?

You actually don't mind the silence between you two, because the day Steve decides to break that pattern brings forth the worst conversation. The type you've been dreading since the moment he appeared at your door. You're cleaning around the apartment and Steve offered to help, first you worked in silence, just the music from your speaker filling the air until a particular song came on. One you played for Steve once that he immediately fell in love with. It became your song. You only recently stopped associating the song with him but you forgot it was in this playlist otherwise you would've picked another one.

"You still listen to this song?" Steve asks. You keep your back turned to him as you wipe down the coffee table.

"Of course I do. I knew the song before- it was, ours." You say.

"This is the first time I've heard it in a while." He muses.

"Duh the song didn't exist until the 2010s." You scoff.

"Yeah I guess that's- that's true. It's strange though, that awareness of what's to come."

"Yeah that's why most of sci fi warns you not to go time jumping."

"You clean with different products now." Steve points out. You're not sure what he's trying to do here but you are in no mood to dance around awkwardness with him.

"Scented products are easier for Bucky. He says plain bleach smells too sterile." You mutter. It's Bucky that buys most of the cleaning products anyway, but he always buys citrus stuff.

"It's not easy, you know, seeing my best friend with the love of my life every day." Steve says after a stretch of silence. At this, you turn to face him, trying to stifle that frustration bubbling inside you.

"You left me. Left us. Not the other way around Steve. You don't get to complain about us having picked up the pieces." You tell him.

"I still love you, that's not something I can just pretend isn't there." He says.

"And I love Bucky." You shrug.

"Not me?"

"It doesn't matter." You shake your head.

"It does."

"If it mattered to you at all you would've never left." You grit out.

"So say it." He says quietly.

"What?"

"Tell me you don't love me."

"Steve-"

"Say it. If what we had is truly all in the past for you tell me you don't love me. That there's no place in your heart for me and- I'll move on."

"This isn't fair." You shake your head.

"No?"

"No! You got the life with Peggy that you thought you wanted. You abandoned me. Now you're asking me to choose you when you didn't choose me. How can you expect me to do that?"

"I'm choosing you now!"

"And I've chosen Bucky. I wanted the world with you. All you had to do was come back to me. And you didn't. It's too late now Steve. You needed to choose me two years ago."

"You still haven't said-"

"I don't love you. That's what you want to hear? You lost me the day you chose not to come back. I shouldn't have to spell it out for you. I chose Bucky, yes. But you-" Deep breath. "If you can't handle me and Bucky together in our home then- maybe you should go stay with Sam or Natasha." You say. You're not going to argue with him.

"Are you kicking me out?"

"I'm offering you an alternative- because, I will not be choosing you. Not now, not ever again, you had your chance and if you can't come to terms with that, if it's too difficult to be around reminders that you fucked up and I kept living life without you then by all means don't destroy your mental health staying here. You have other friends."

"How can you expect me to just- pretend what we had means nothing? How can you pretend it means nothing?"

"I'm not asking you to pretend shit. I also am not pretending it means nothing I'm just aware of the reality that it's over and that's something you need to come to terms with because you left and Bucky made me feel alive again when your leaving nearly killed me. It's been two years, did you think I would simply be waiting indefinitely for you to decide I was worth something to you again?"

"Wait a second you have always been worth something to me. You've always been worth everything." Steve frowns.

"You don't get to say that! You don't abandon people that are 'worth everything' to you. You chose someone else and that's a choice you have to live with." You say, your finger practically in his face. The sound of the apartment door opening disrupts your anger enough that you step back.

"Hey guys- did I miss something?" Bucky frowns looking between you two even though you've already stopped back over to the coffee table. Bucky's quick to come to your side, scanning your face for any clues as to what's going on, although he heard the last bit of what you said as he was coming down the hall. "Baby?" He coaxes gently, his fingers stroking against your side.

"I'm gonna go to Sam's for a little while." Steve grits out.

"Feel free to stay there." You clip before you can stop yourself. Steve's footfalls pause for a moment at your words but he doesn't respond before eventually he trudges out the front door.

"Feel free to stay there?! What... happened while I was out?" Bucky asks with a disbelieving chuckle.

"He has... a lot of nerve." You force out through clenched teeth.

"You're gonna have to give me more details than that so I can understand what's wrong doll."

"He just told me how hard it is to watch his best friend with the 'love of his life' every day. The love of his life that he left to be with a woman that lived and died without him. He asked me to choose him. Because after two years I'm supposed to still love the man that left me. Because it's not enough that he almost destroyed me the last time. Because for some reason he thinks I'd rather be picked two years too late."

"He's hurting."

"Yeah well, so was I. Two years ago. He'll live. I did." You shrug. Bucky pulls you into a hug, kissing the top of your head as he gently sways you both back and forth. You lived through hell that day you realized Steve chose a life with Peggy. You'd be damned if you ever let that happen again.

***

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers x reader #marvel #marvel fanfiction #steve rogers #bucky x reader #bucky #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes fluff #steve rogers angst #steve rogers fanfiction

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tan1shere · 3 months ago

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Hi! So if you’re comfortable with it i’d love to request Professor!Billie x reader. I love how in “Her Favorite” Billie asks if Reader is okay and if she needs anything. So what if Reader is quiet and shy but is sh-ing maybe Billie sees scars on her arm? Idk just super fluffy and angsty. Again please only write it if you’re comfortable with the request. Have a great day and thank you for your amazing writing 💕

My priority

A/n: yes ofc !! Thank you for checking angel, I'm more than ok with writing this :) I hope you enjoy <3

Warnings - mentions of self harm, cuts ??, and depression, so please don't read if it's triggering in any way ! || Masterlist

Another draining day at this hell hole of a college. You dreaded it each day you just wanted to stay in bed and hide from everyone. You go to your first class of the day, wearing oversized everything as you couldn't care less you just wanted to be comfortable. You take a seat at the back, out of everyone's way. When you accidentally bump into someone. "Sorry." You say timidly. "Watch where you're going." They say bluntly. You sigh hoping this day doesn't drag on too much.

Nearing the end of this class, you couldn't be more happier. Although you loved your professor. She was the kindest person, and honestly made it a lot less horrible. Everyone has already left, like always you are the last to leave. "Bye Ms O'Connell." You give her a gentle smile. She does the same. "Bye sweetheart, have a good day." You blush slightly, she always made you so nervous. Did you have a slight crush on her?

Fast forward a few weeks and you were having the worst day known to man. You had woken up late, burned your tongue. Every little thing seemed to happen, badly. Setting your whole mood off. You had even forgotten your jacket, feeling cold. Bringing your arms around your body ever so slightly everywhere you went. You weren't always such a joyful person, you had severe depression. It always lingered inside you maybe that's why people never wanted to be near you, were you scary to them?

It was that same class again, and you honestly couldn't of been more thankful, knowing she'd cheer you up just by her presence. You go to sit down in your usual spot, writing down something when you feel a presence by you. Ms O'Connell, she was looking at you with the softest smile. But her eyes moved from your face and it faded. Your brows furrow wondering why she was looking at you in such a way. Had you spilt something on yourself- but as she walks to the front and you look. You facepalm.

You idiot, how could you forget your jacket for that reason. She most definitely saw them, and now you truly wanted to hide. Instead of being last you try to be the first one out. "Y/n, hun?" You hear her say making you stop. Her voice was so delicate. Your head turns to look at her. Humming in response. "Could we talk?" You slowly nod. Approaching her slowly, you look into her eyes. "I'm here for you." Is all she says. Your eyes avert from hers, watching as the other students leave. "And you can always-" She begins but you turn back to face her with tears in your eyes.

It truly breaks her heart. She doesn't say a word just brings you into a hug which you tightly reciprocate. Crying softly into the hug. "It's ok, you can talk to me." She soothes your hair, gently kissing the top of it. She knew you needed as much comfort right now. "I feel so alone." You sobbed, honestly quite pathetically but you couldn't care less you just needed this hug desperately. You needed warmth of someone.

"Shhh, it's ok. You're never alone. And if it helps you have me, I promise." Maybe it was childhood trauma but you felt comfort in her, even if she was your professor. She moves you with her going into her tiny office in the room. "We can sit here for awhile, you can rant. Cry more. Or just stay silent whatever you prefer. Just know I'm here for you." You hug her so tightly after she says that.

You finally felt seen.

Im so sorry if this isn't the best :( my brain was lacking more creativity but I hope this is what you were after even a little bit :)!

#billie #billie eilish x you #billie eilish fluff #billie eilish fanfiction #billie eilish x reader #billie eilish

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moxxbox · 2 years ago

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When Housewardens/Dormleaders have a crush<3

FIrst part done!!!! 2 or 3 parts left to do! (most likely 2)

The Little Things They do<3

Riddle Rosehearts

He'd let you get away with breaking minor rules. Running in the halls? Just a reminder to be careful! Mingling at the table for longer than 15 minutes after finishing your meal? No worries, it happens to the best of us!

Leona Kingscholar

You're his pillow(/hj). When you're around he's a bit more outwardly prideful. If you pay close attention when you talk to him, you'll notice his tail faintly swaying more than usual. If you share any classes, he'll attend them!

Azul Ashengrotto

He's less smug, more shy-ish. Odds of you getting looped into a scam contract are low...but never zero(/j). You'll see the tweels a lot, dragging you around. To go embarrass Azul of course!

Kalim Al-Asim

He gets noticeably blushy. He'd also be more energetic around you + a tad bit clinger with you! He would def buy Grim tuna. Plus on random days, there'd be presents for you at your front door!!!

Vil Schoenheit

If you have an eye for detail, you'll notice his lipstick is a different shade. It's so that if you kiss, the tint it'll leave will look good on you!

Idia Shroud

pink hair pink hair pink hair So we all know how this guy acts. Very obvious but yeah. When you're talking to him there's a slight pink tint to his hair and very apparent on his face. He has a lil'toothy smiles on his face when you're around, and he doesn't even realize!

Malleus Draconia

Shows up at Ramshackle more often, and also invites you on late-night walks with him! Introduces you to his Tamagotchi thing(idk the name of it I'm sorry😭) After like midterms and finals, etc. He'll show up at Ramshackle with ice cream to share with you! Spending time together to de-stress!

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shelbgrey · 2 years ago

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Hi! alright? could you do a fanfic where the reader (or y/n) is Emmett and Rosalie's adopted daughter and they just LOVE the fact that she's a redhead? they love her freckles all over her cheeks and fiery red hair, not only them, but the entire Cullen family, they love it!! And maybe one imagines where someone at school admires her for her fiery hair and vampires don't like it! Idk ❤️.

Forever now(Emmett Cullen and Rosalie Hale)

Paring: Daughter!Reader X Emmett Cullen x Rosalie Hale.

Summary: normally when a child in need crosses the path of the Cullens carlisle is always willing to find a spot in his family for them but when a small red-head crosses their path its Rosalie's turn to start the family she's always wanted.

A/n: I love this request so much. I love purness in it and I'm excited to write my first Twilight request.

A/n #2: request are currently closed so I can work on my Emmett Cullen series.

MasterList

The little girl with firey hair story starts a little while back. The little girl was no less than two when she we welcomed into the Cullen family. The little girl's mother had died while giving birth to her and her father was unfit to take care of her.

The soul residents of small town in Alaska became concerned for the red-head child which led her in the hands of the chief of police. This was Beyond the cop's knowledge, so of course he called Carlisle Cullen who was head of the hospital he worked at the time. He had brought the small red-head girl to the hospital and Carlisle was in aw as the small girl stared at him with big doe eyes, almost too shy for her own good.

Carlisle knelt down to her hight and offered his hand. He smiled softly as the little girl approached him carefully. She was clueless to the situation but she knew she could trust the blonde doctor with gold eyes.

Alice had a vision of the red-head girl with freckles but the version she saw, Carlisle and Esme adopted her. Alice's visions had never been so wrong...

Not even the 300 year old vampire could explain what happened that day. As the little girl wondered around the bright house she curiously walked up to Emmett. He was setting in the living room playing video games when the small girl poked his knee a mumbled a small word...

“giant”

It was the first time they heard her talk and they were not disappointed. Emmett chuckled at the smell girl as she hugged on his giant leg. She didn't shy away from him. She did the same with Rosalie.

The family have never seen her this happy. She had gotten home from late from a shopping trip that same night and she was in love as soon as she saw the little girl's fuzzy red hair and beautiful freckles setting on Emmett's lap.

“who's this?” she smiled. The little girl waved at Rosalie and had a big cheesey smile. Rose loved every part of the little girl. In her eyes she's was perfect, from her red hair to her freckles.

The little girl stayed for about a week before the family made the decision of what would the future would be. As that week passed Rosalie grew more and More attached. She would always make sure she ate well and would do her hair everyday. Just like a mother would.

As for Emmett he was slightly afraid to be around the small human. With his bone crushing strength and everything else that came with being a vampire he would never forgive himself if he hurt her.

Of course that didn't stop the little girl. She would giggle and follow him around where ever he went. If he was working on his jeep she would laugh and crawl under it with him. If he was playing video games she would crawl into his lap begging him to read her a story.

All that two year old understood was, this was her home and the people around her was family. She was so young her brain told her Emmett and Rosalie was Mommy and Daddy. Which led Rosalie to life aultering decision after that one single word that fell out of Little red's mouth.

'mama'

Edward nor Jasper could even put into words how happy she was. When she heard that she was glowing with happiness as she held the little girl.

“mama loves you darling” she mumbled. After that the family knew she had a home there and they also knew Rosalie would fight tooth and nail for that little girl.

That night Rosalie layed on the couch as the little girl slept soundly in her arms. Emmett quietly joined her with a huge grien. “okay” he simply replied.

“okay?” she chuckled not really catching on.

“she's ours Rose” his smile only got bigger as he watched his mate hold the little girl with nothing but pure happiness.

“your mommy and daddy love you so much little y/n” Rosalie said kissing her sleeping head.

And that's how the little girl with red hair and freckles became y/n Hale-Cullen. The little girl brought so much joy into the family and each family member ment so much too her.

Emmett and Rosalie of course were #1 in her eyes but as she made herself comfortable in the family she also made meaningful relationships.

She was a listener and an observer so she quickly caught on that carlisle and Esme were her parents 'parents'. She would often call carlisle, Car or pops. When she was little she couldn't properly say his name which lead to Car and pops. Carlisle became close with the small child as well, he loved her personality and loved it when she'd ask about being a doctor. Then Esme. Y/n grew close with Esme immediately, if she wasn't with rose then she was with Esme.

Her Aunts and Uncles were the same. She'd never say it out loud but Jasper was her favorite uncle. Jasper would say y/n was the only thing pure in his life, but that was true for all of them.

Then there's the who vampire thing. Y/n wasn't stupid and of course she wanted to know why mom and dad never ate gold fish crackers like she did and she wanted to know why when ever she had a bad dreams mom and dad weren't in bed asleep when she ran in for comfort.

She was about six years old when she found out. She knew she had to keep it a secret and she was very good at it. This also led to Rosalie's fear of her becoming a vampire. Of course she wanted her daughter to be around Forever, but her heart broke eveytime she thought about the opportunities that would be tooken away from her. Which is why she's now 16 and looked the same age as her uncle Edward.

Y/n would never say it out loud but she was sick of it. She wanted to be like her family and it was hard for her grow up while everyone else in her family remained the same ages. She wanted her mom's gold eyes and her father's strength... She just wanted to feel normal in what she felt was a normal family but here she was, now 16 going to High school with her parents and her Aunts and Uncles.

Just livin' the dream...

--------( ....... )--------

So far Forks was y/n favorite palce to live. She's been just about everywhere, that came with being a Cullen. But something about this town was special to her. But the down fall was all the curious eyes. She didn't like the attention her family received. She hated how people would watch them... She hated how people watched her and that made her have second thoughts about the thing everyone loved about her.

She's was going through a 'phase' at least Emmett and Rosalie hoped it was. Her phase was she didn't like how her hair looked, no matter how many times Rosalie or Esme would tell her how beautiful she was. But no matter what she did with it everyone still seemed to be in aw about it.

Especially the boys at Forks High...

As I said before she hated how people watched her. Her beautiful hair is the reason why people watched her. She started to resent it no matter how many different ways Rosalie or Alice styled it or how many times Carlisle would say how beautiful it was. She just hated the attention. She hated the attention the high school boys gave her.

“Hey, y/n” Mike Newton said one day as she was leaving her English class.

Y/n wasn't a socializing type, hell she was shy. She would just mumbled a small hello with a smile. Mike continued to walk with her and eye her up and down.

“your hair is pretty today” Mike smiled. It was a nice thing to say, yes but as he said it y/n passed her uncle Jasper.

“Hey I was wondering if-”

Jasper slammed his locker shut in anger as he felt impure feelings the teen felt for his niece. In Mike's defense he truly liked her but he would never be her type. Jasper took on the role of the big brother he played at school and walked up to the two.

“hi y/n” he said glaring at Mike. Y/n rolled her eyes as milk gulped.

Jasper continued to walk down the hallway with the two as he intimidated Mike. Y/n sighed and looked down in embarrassment but at the same time thankfull it wasn't her father. Emmett would have made it ten times worse.

“Hey Mike, weren't you gonna say something?” y/n asked softly as they walked to their next class with Jasper.

He shrugged. “I honestly don't remember” he said staying silent in fear of what Jasper would do. They then walked passed Alice and Rosalie in the hallway he recoiled even further as he felt Rosalie's percing eyes. Rose didn't say anything though, she knew her daughter was safe with Jasper. She also knew Emmett would have a cow if he found out.

Despite the angry eyes of the Cullen family, Mike couldn't stop looking at her beautiful red hair. He loved the way the curls perfectly framed her face and bounced as she moved gracefully. But you just don't look at y/n Cullen like that. No matter if you have good intentions or not.

So Mike failed and so did a handful of others at school. Jasper of course kept it a secret like y/n asked but his mind would wonder and if it wondered to that one faithful day Edward would find out. And Edward refused to lie to Emmett or Rosalie when it came y/n.

This would lead to Emmett putting the fear of God in Mike dispite his daughter's pleas. Yes she found him annoying but the kindness Esme and Carlisle had tougher made her fear for Mike.

Tyler was the only one who was close to even getting a date with her. She actually liked him at one point but then he moved away. But after that y/n stopped showing interest in the boys of her school. She stopped even if they still loved her and her red hair.

Those human boys never mattered to her. There was no possible future due to her life style and family. They especially stopped mattering after she found her mate Benjamin...

The first thing Benjamin noticed about her was her freckled covered cheeks as she smile. He couldn't help but smile with her. He was in love with her firey red hair and couldn't stop staring at how it perfectly layed on her shoulders or how it reminded him of the sunsets at his home.

All the things she grew tired of because of the boys at Forks High, she grew to love because of Benjamin's genuine compliments and love he had for the things that made her stand out.

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cherubshert · 5 months ago

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omg ur so good at writing angst i need another toxic relationship heeseung post

❥Genre: Angst (cheating)

❥a/n: thank u so much for your request!! :)) this might sound a bit odd but i don't really like writing toxic relationships cause it feels too real 😭. idk I'm also a super over thinker lol... The name for the other person is made up !! This is purely fiction!! don't take it seriously!!! I am also a really bad writer so this maybe bad lol

You're so overwhelmed with emotion, Karina's words replaying in your mind. "...the way they held eachother, was so odd. i don't want to start something but they definitely have something going on behind your back."

It made everything make sense, the sudden wall that grew between the both of you, the excuses on why he couldn't meet you, even on days when you knew he wasn't busy, the lack of emotion in his eyes when he looked at you. You didn't want to seem insecure or clingy so you let it go, but now the puzzle pieces were coming together, so quickly you couldn't control it.

Him sitting before you drags you out of your thoughts. The Heeseung you once loved looked so different now, the previously shy man who chased you non stop before your relationship looked like a stranger. "Sorry I'm late." he says shortly, before ordering his drink. You ask him about his day, you didn't want to scare him off yet. His answers felt real but still distant. As his order arrived you watch him eat.

"Who's Cora?" You watch him pause, placing his cup down before looking up at you. "Classmate." "Karina said she's seen you two around, be... buddy buddies." "Oh? we have class together of course we'll be friendly with eachother."

You stare at him, struggling to read the look on his face. You reach for your phone, opening up your group chat with you lr friends, showing him the series of photos they got of them together. His face pales, your fingers helping him scroll through, stopping on a picture of them kissing.

"I... This isn't what-" "It looks like? it's fake? I have videos if you'd like to see them." You sigh. "I won't shame you for falling out of love, but you should have at least broken things off with me first. That hurts so much less than knowing I wasn't worth fidelity." He panics, shaking his head, reaching for your hand, you pull away.

"I can explain, please." "Go ahead, fill me in." you cross your hands over your chest, tilting your head to the side. A series of emotions fly across his face, his shoulders ultimately dropping in defeat. "I'm sorry." he croaks out. You stand to your feet, his hands grabbing your before you could leave. "I still love you, I still feel everything I told you I felt for you that night." you laugh bitterly, swatting his hand away. "The feeling isn't mutual, goodluck with your new relationship."

#cherubshert diary.#kpop fanfic #enhypen x reader #enhypen imagines #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen fic #enhypen drabbles #lee heesung x reader #heeseung angst #enhypen angst #cherub𔘓works #kpop x poc reader #kpop x black reader

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womensflesh · 3 months ago

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ermmm its late for me but! i wanna hear about u and ak can u tell some good stories? how did u guys meet? how long have u been dating? it feels like u guys have been together for years

Ahh I'm actually really glad to get an ask like this again :'-) something I missed on my old blog... we met I believe through promo hour on here. He followed me first and I followed back. We've been together since April 20th of this year ^_^ it does feel longer.

First time in forever I video called w some friends and like... i was wearing my mask as per usual (insecure as fuck about my grin) and I remember he joined. I changed beforehand. He did notice immediately. For the first time genuinely in forever I video called with my mask off and like im gonna show my whole ass here and say I was a little bit worried he'd see me and. Idk. I guess see the ugly I see. He didn't. My friends still like to kind of rib me for how it was glaringly obvious whenever i was looking at him. A friend of mine said my eyes " lit up " and it was the most she had seen me smile. I don't smile in pictures. Or very often.

I've been thinking a lot of how my cats would like him. I know Ringo would probably just growl and hide but he's Ringo so that's to be expected. I think Layer would really like him. Something I notice is like... idk. I feel like I could trust him with my cats. I'm very particular about my cats. Freddy is shy at first but I could see him getting cuddly.

I've been wanting to burn him a CD, and once I'm less under my parents' thumbs and can drive without breath down my neck, ill send it to him with like. Idk. Been thinking of making another sock cat plush. Kind of stuck on the track list right now. 80 minutes maximum, I gotta make it count...

#listy z psia buda #thank you for asking ... it makes me happy to know someone wants to hear about us truly #its late.. er. early here as well (6:44am)

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acourtofthought · 7 months ago

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Is High Lady a legitimate position? or was that just made up to make Feyre legitimately the most powerful fae (like her mate)? Does being a high lady require a different set of socio-political functions than any lady in Prythian? Or are they just ladies in positions of power who are really really powerful?

Also, should Elucien be the main couple in the next book, how do you want SJM to explore other courts since Lucien is connected to a lot of them?

Lastly, idk if you answered this but what attributes from Feysand and Nessian made you shy away from them becoming high king and queen? After seeing your posts about characteristics of Elucien that make them suitable to rule, I'd like to hear more from you!

This is not a hater question if you ship the canon couples. Hope you have a great day.

High Lady was a legitimate position at one point though it seems to have fallen out of favor as of late, probably because certain "dictator-like" High Lords who wed had / have the mentality that their wives are not their equals (i.e. Beron, Rhys's father).

I imagine the way Sarah has written it is that High Lady is different than other Lady's in society in that they are the rulers of a court. They share in the same decision making process / voice of authority for a court that a High Lord would. I actually think it has less to do with power and more to do with being the ones to set the laws, where those who work for them are expected to follow their orders when they do issue commands (a sometimes necessary thing).

Where their purpose is to ensure the safety and well being of their people.

As for as Elucien exploring other courts, I feel like Spring is where they'd spend a good bit of time because Spring is the court that needs the most work. The people have been ignored, the land is beginning to die and it's army is something the NC needs as an ally (not to mention a strong force against Beron).

Day I think they'll travel to in order to learn more about Elain's powers.

I think Autumn will be where they visit after Beron is defeated so Lucien can reconnect with his mother.

The human lands to meet with Jurian after Vassa is forced to return, I think we'll also see Elain finally put Graysen in his place.

Feysand are decent enough leaders.... To the Night Court. Everything they do is to protect the people of Velaris (not even so much other territories there) and while it can't be denied that they do love their citizens, they have proven they are willing to use the people of other courts as collateral to prioritize their goals.

Yes, they fought for all fae and humans during the war but Rhys's first priority during Amarantha’s reign was Velaris. Feyre was willing to displace innocent people in Spring in order to get revenge on Tamlin.

So while they do often care for many, they are still willing to sacrifice them at other times. A High King and High Lady will not make good rulers if they're already showing favoritism.

Nessian, I think it's a bit of the same not to mention Cassian is clearly uncomfortable with the political game which is territory being in charge comes with, like it or not. Nesta does fight for others but that character trait typically comes out only when she sees someone truly in need of a fighter and only when she deems it to be something truly unjust. I.e., she did speak up in the High Lords meeting but only after Beron declared the meeting was over. And Feyre initially asked her to tell her story during the meeting and Nesta refused. Nesta is a lot nicer to those she considers weak than those who are equal to her or more powerful. And she chose to ignore the people of Velaris after the war, choosing instead to drink and gamble for a year. I'm not faulting her for that, I understand she was depressed. But I think someone who is a leader tries to move forward and focuses on the needs of the people rather than letting themselves get sucked into themselves. It's kind of why Tamlin isn't the best leader, he let his depression overtake the needs of his court.

But Elain, after losing her father and Graysen and her humanity helped the fae in Velaris rebuild their gardens after the war even though we know she was still struggling. She made an effort to learn what fae traditions meant to them though she grew up fearing their kind. She became invested in the people rather than focusing on her losses. Her personality makes it possible for have decent a relationship with all personality types versus her her sisters who at times come off as combative towards others.

And Lucien? Though he's loyal, we've also been shown that he cares about the needs of the many. People get so caught up on how he didn't do more for Feyre but that's because to him there were many who also needed something. The people of spring, it's High Lord being able to help the court get back on its feet. Not to mention his choosing to help the humans rebuild after the war and sort out their politics. His willingness to help the NC.

Lucien doesn't have blind loyalty to just one place, he cares about many and to me, that is the kind of personality that would make for a fair and just High King.

#elucien #pro elucien #elain archeron #lucien vanserra

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doubledyke · 5 months ago

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How do you believe Eds' childhood was like? Like since the moment toddler Edd meet Ed and Eddy until the events showed on the show? I guess the first half of their childhood were more peaceful and softer, where they were mostly playing games, they were less hated in previous years, and Edd and Eddy's relationship was better (they were certainly less hormonal and confrontational in that time).

i'm not sure how long ed and eddy were friends before edd arrived, but they probably became friends after eddy tried to bully ed and was taken aback by ed's response. i'm picturing their first interaction being something along the lines of "nice pamper there, stretch!" and ed takes it as a genuine compliment and offers to let eddy try it on but only if he can wear eddy's "dress". eddy's embarrassed and is about to run home to mommy but then ed eats a rock or a shoe or something and eddy gets an idea for his first(?) money making venture, bottomless ed.

as far as what they'd get up to before edd comes along i imagine it being pretty similar to stuff we see the two do in the show. roughhousing, gross pranks, eating junk food, watching movies, and eddy making ed do weird stuff for his own entertainment.

at home idk, i mean given the fact that not only is ed still wearing a diaper at such a late stage, but that he's allowed to leave the house without pants kinda tells me all i need to know and confirms that his parents just don't care. i generally think that baths are a sensory nightmare for ed (and that he's probably unknowingly allergic to whatever soap his family uses) and that his parents just gave up trying after a while. it could be the same with clothing for him at that age? regardless, its still a dereliction of duty on their part not to address those things.

eddy's still under bro's thumb whether literally or proverbially. i could be wrong but it seems like bro would either be just about to leave or would have recently left by the time the eds meet. i tend to think he'd still be there but the theoretical timeline is a bit confusing to me. anyway, eddy's home life is the most outwardly normal of the three and i'm not sure i have much to say about them at that time that wouldn't send me into a 3 page nonsensical ramble about eddy and my weirdly specific ideas about his family. suffice to say, he's repressing a lot and has zero insight about what happened to him (he's like 5). he's probably still physically healing from the last game of 'uncle'.

edd's family comes along and no one even knows the new couple on the block has a kid till someone notices a strange little child peeking out the upstairs window from time to time. anyway, i guess it's canon that edd meets the other two when he ends up being a mark for the bottomless ed thing. when i think of tiny edd i imagine the opening for matilda (1996) where matilda basically caring for herself and is already going out on her own, like to the library. that's what edd is up to before he meets ed and eddy. going back and forth to the library and occasionally venturing outside to catch butterflies and look at rocks and stuff. he just happens to cross paths with tweedledee and tweedledum one day and being that he's freshly traumatized (dodgeball incident) and naturally shy and anxious, he's easily swayed by someone like eddy who's always had a strong personality. edd's also likely intrigued and even charmed by his and ed's irreverence and their unabashed childishness. both of which are foreign concepts to him, even at that age. i picture him just sort of tagging along with them for a while in the beginning, hiding behind a tree or something when things get a little too rambunctious. but with the help of eddy's constant ribbing and ed's frequent comparisons of him to some kind of alien species he saw in a movie, edd slowly learns to let loose a little. hanging out with edd and eddy gives him a weird sense of rebellion since the pair are certainly not the upstanding fellows his parents would prefer he spend time around. alright alright i'm cutting myself off here.

as far as any activities the tiny eds do together, like i said they're pretty much doing the same stuff but spending more time playing rather than looking for ways to make money. sadly i think eddy didn't get much of a chance to play with other kids when bro was around since he'd either be too busy placating bro and/or other kids were too scared to come around. so he might take the opportunity to do more kid stuff once bro is gone and now that he has a couple of pals. ed's just happy to be out of the house where his parents are constantly bickering and his baby sister is constantly crying and already wreaking havoc.

edd and eddy's relationship (and ed and edd's for that matter) takes a while to develop because eddy is low-key weirded out by edd, but can tell he's smart so wants to keep him around. like i mentioned, edd is very reserved around the eds early on and doesn't really know how long he's even going to be allowed to spend time with them. luckily for him, his parents are never home and are none the wiser to some of the trio's more hazardous escapades. if anything he'd just deceptively plead amnesia in the event that he was confronted.

i will say i think the eds would still already be ostracized by that point. eddy for his relation to bro, ed and edd for their association with eddy. i do like the idea of eddy and kevin being friends at some point early on, but i haven't given much thought to what that would look like. so for the purpose of this goofy post, we'll assume that was not the case.

#text

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heckinhacker · 2 years ago

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hi so i was wondering if u could do one like “Eric Cartman x Reader - South Park's days are OVER.” but with kyle, like they are the same and everything, idk if u have already done it

Kyle Broflovski x Reader - South Park might be saved, after all??

Which means we get the version where Kyle meets someone similiar to himself! It's like a 'sequel', (but not really, more like an alternative version with same trope) to “Eric Cartman x Reader - South Park's days are OVER.”

Remember that when I write for South Park, they're teenagers at less(16 y/o minimum), adults at most! it's silly i write it every south park post but better safe than sorry~

I gave Kyle green color for easier reading experience in dialogues!

note: color code might be broken because lately tumblr on pc is being silly goofy

Kyle had a great grasp of how fucked up situations in south park are having occurances

Aaand he's pretty aware there will be noone else who understands him.

Or so he thought.

There is a new student announced to be in his class while you all were in 4th grade or so?

And you seemed not too quiet, nor too shy, but surely smart enough not to push yourself into any weird situations.

Teacher sat you both together and Kyle tries to talk you up-

"Hey! I'm Kyle, it's refreshing to have a new face around. Want to play with us on long break?"

It's nice to have a new group to play with, so you agree.

Ah, kids and their not complicated feelings, right? <3

You tag along, and you grew really quickly to dislike Cartman-

It's not hard to hate him he's UNBEARABLE,

Kyle wants to let out his signature "Shut up, fatass!"

but you beat him to it-

"Shut up, fatso, mama did not taught you to behave, or was she absent in your life like yo papa?"

You had NO idea he's fatherless and it made other guys go "OOOHHHH--"

you made yourself an enemy in Cartman,

but an ally in Kyle.

You seemed to have similiar nerdy interests,

From playing Stick of Truth and heroes,

to DnD (that he played online, because not with his group-- but he invited you into his new online session!!)

Beside Terrance and Philip, Kyle also liked that vampire/werewolf series called "Under Devil's grasp" that seemed mostly for girls or boring, yet he liked it in secret and once he caught you watching first episodes, just...because,

and then joined you, for his own re-watch and your first watch, he liked seeing how you reacted

"HOW COULD YOU?" you asked out of sudden once, in a call,

"How could I what?" Kyle asks, having you on speaker while he does his homework.

" YOU KNEW ALL THE TIME THAT BARRY WILL BE KILLED AND YOU DID NOTHING TO WARN ME, I GREW TO LOVE HIM AND NOW HE'S GONE."

"Well, you said no spoilers?"

"KYLE."

He giggles, "Plus he had death flags since always so-"

He's playing, it turns out Barry barely lived and hid for like season and a half to return in dramatical moment that he watched with you and you SCREAMED.

And he has a blast with your reactions <3

And so on, you bond over similiarities,

Over years you put many blood, sweat and tears into your friendship, and you're glued by hip. Kyle won't ever pick between you and Stan who is his closer friend, it would be even cruel to ask.

You two got along decently, good, not badly, but it always seemed you're more closer with Kyle than Stan.

You grew beside each other and your families became one, big family because of how close you've gotten between each other and made them grow closer. (Or not if your relation with them is bad)

No matter your family (or your own) relligion, you spend Hanukkah with Kyle and it's almost a norm of you being around.

Listen, Ike? Absolutely adores you. Kyle sometimes has a laugh your'e more of an older sibling than he is.

(Absolute bull, we all know Ike loves Kyle the most <3)

Kyle's family wanted to make little ride to nearest amusement park

Of course they suggested you go too! You're a part of the family already <3

You have the fun of your lives, all of you. Kyle's parents mostly chill around but you, Kyle and Ike are using all the activities possible while you can, stuffing yourselves with snacks and sweets.

Bad idea, if you'd ask me

You went to roller coaster and none of you paid no mind in that choice,

but Kyle's stomach DID pay a mind

Especially in a middle where he felt like throwing out

And hell, he did! But he took out his hat and puked int oit so noone got blessed with mix of dinner and snacks.

He was almost carried out of the roller coaster by you--

You decided to go to ferris wheel and call it after a day.

They were two-people cabin on the wheel, so Ike let you two have one while he went with some other random kid.

Ike is your biggest wingman, he did that on purpose of course. Little guy <3

When you're up high, alone, with Kyle, having option to look at all the view, you can't help but to look at little buildings under you, and then to take a peak at Kyle.

Oh boy, were you surprised when you met his gaze-

He blushed furiously and muttered "Sorry- Uh- did not mean to stare."

Of course - you did not mind, but that was SURPRISING.

You did not bother him about it though. Whatever he had in mind - nothing, or something, he will come around.

But you might've realised that you DO have feelings towards your childhood best friend. For sure.

You remember how I mentioned your shared liked series with Kyle, "Under Devil's grasp" ? Soo...

Imagine it was near end, and studio decided to make finale into movie, two and half hour long one.

It's a series you two follow since you were kids, OF COURSE you have to be there in the cinema.

You ride with Kyle to big city, with his freshly acquired driver license and shitty car of his.

You enjoy your WHOLE drive there, time spent in bigger city, it all was just amazing.

Series, even though it was mostly about vampires and werewolves, was called "Under Devil's grasp" and it's very questionable, for years there were just theories, yet the movie after all those years of content literally ended with said title as last words.

Y'all were crying already enough but it was such a HIT in the face

When you walked out of cinema you whipped your tears out of your eyes, so did Kyle, as you giggled and gushed about the ending of your beloved series.

Ride home was mixed, going from peaceful to chaotic, just atosphere was...magical. Lights of highway, music blasting loudly and Kyle jamming to it, while you take a glance with full adoration at him.

You sing a little, then you rest and sooner than later end up in South Park.

Kyle drives to your house first to drop you off, walks out of car to walk you to your door, and gazes at you.

"Thank you...for today. I had fun! I hope you did too."

"I did, you kidding me? Thanks for even offering. I...really appreciate it."

Kyle seems to hesitate, and then sighs deeply.

"...I love you."

" Yeah, good night to you too man- oh wait what the fuck-??"

"I...wanted to say so, and today's spent time with you made me realise I'd hate you to spend the day out of South Park with someone else. I'd hate for you to have late-night drives with somebody else, I'd hate to see you happy with somebody else because...well, I wish you stayed with me. Of course I mean- have fun with others, I just...I wish you'd keep your heart on my hands. It's fine if you'd prefer to stay friends, I hope it doesn't break our friendship. But I uh...I wanted to let you know."

...that was...a lot. Wow."

He thinks it's a rejection, but...

It's not, really

You grab his cheeks and kiss him before he can get into tangent of self-doubt.

Then smile at him,

and say:

"Information saved. Let's grab something to eat tommorow together too, alright, boyfriend?"

You smile and wave him away goodnight and closed your door.

...

"...boyfriend?"

He's so giddy pls <3

Other's reactions:

Ike:

FUCKING FINALLY 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALO.

My little dude was waiting for the moment you hold hands and kiss each other already for TOO LONG

I mean, don't kiss too much in front of him he'd gag, it's still his older brother we're talking about

but at least Kyle pinning over you days are OVER.

He congratulates you and gives you gift cards of "congratulations on marriage!" drew with crayons and pencils

My man Ike is an anime fan, he made you badass gift card <3

Stan:

Not surprised but surprised at the same time.

He's second biggest fan, first being Ike

He learned the news from Kyle himself the same night you became a thing, later Ike hit him up because he was excited BSHSH

He hears Kyle out and congratulates him A LOT

Kenny:

He kind off knew? everyone kind off knew but he was sure you were already dating so...

news were shocking because

"Weren't you dating already? damn-"

he was sure you're married and expecting a kid/j

he doesn't have strong reaction because, as I said, it's not much of a news for him not going to lie

Cartman:

He always tried taking away whatever Kyle loved the most

So he's salty he failed this time

He always makes you both miserable, with slightest show of affection he is making big clown show out of it

Enough that just guys ask you to STOP with PDA because Cartman is being fucking annoying

He's just that salty single friend man for sure <3

Lemme be honest, it's not one of my best works, but I have (I am in a middle of...) 9 days streak of work straight, I am exhausted beyond human belief, but maybe because my ability to hold my ground is shitty, thanks depreshon--

So yes, It's not my best piece, but it was pretty much expected, so :>

I wanted to tag @bath1lda because of "kyle kyle" spam ask hehe- I hope you, and everyone else who read it, a nice "have a good read" :>

#hacker writes #headcanons #south park #south park x reader #kyle #kyle brovlofski #kyle broflovski x reader #south park kyle x reader #sp kyle #sp kyle x reader

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actualbird · 6 months ago

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HI, I'M A BIT (very) LATE TO THE PARTY... but i just got through main story 11.1 and 11.2 WOOO!!!

and i'm not sure what is it about this case that got me so much more paranoid than the other cases, maybe it's the creepy note in the satchel, or how the culprit wasn't obvious at all (at least to me, i didn't want to doubt to sweet old lady).

which brings me to my next point: something about having the sweet old lady be the culprit is deeply unsettling to me... cause she's not like ava kendriks or like... the other culprits we've come across... (wow could someone make a recap of the whole of main story cause i'm forgetting) who you think like "oh they're kinda fucked up in the first place so it makes sense". but why it's unsettling to me is because, the thought that even a sweet looking senile old woman is capable of crime, if the right buttons are pushed... and she did it not only once, BUT TWICE. idk if you've watched bong joon-ho's "mother", but she reminded me of the mother from that movie, who is willing to do anything for her son, whether that may be good or bad, even killing someone herself when she finds out that the truth that her son was a murderer. like, if the circumstances were met, people are capable and are willing to do... wrong.

that said, THIS TRULY WAS A VYN EPISODE... IT OPENED MY MIND. I'M SORRY I'VE BEEN SLEEPING ON YOU VYN!!! like vyn during these two chapters... really intrigued me. when he shot himself with the air gun and knowingly drank the poisoned tea (GOD DOES ANYONE IN THIS HOUSEHOLD HAVE ANY SENSE OF SELF-PRESERVATION. MY GIRL ROSA WOULD BE STRESSED AF). but it's the way he heavily relies on himself, even to his own detriment, that really intrigues me. even when rosa was there, i feel like he isn't even able to let himself fully rely on her either, but he'd rather put himself in harms way to get the results he wants (which i can name TWO BOYS WITH THE SAME LACK OF SELF PRESERVATION, i'm looking at you luke and marius). but the difference between luke and marius' "self-sacrificial"-ness to vyn's is that, vyn fully knows the consequences and is in control of the situation. it's like he has weighed options and run the calculation in his head, and STILL goes for it even if it runs the risk of hurting himself. he's just as reckless, or even more so, than marius and luke if i may argue. and another point to add is, while luke's and marius' "self-sacrificing" nature comes from viewing themselves as "lesser" than the other (eg. luke viewing himself less than rosa, and marius viewing himself less than giann) vyn's "self-sacrificing" act comes from pride and his inability to rely on others (in other words he views himself better than others)

i've also been thinking about how vyn still choose to drank the poisoned tea. like i know it was to pin point jill meadows as the culprit, bUT SURELY, THERE HAS TO BE ANOTHER WAY OF GOING ABOUT THIS, ISN'T THERE??? VYN RICHTER, THE WAY YOUR MIND WORKS........... ahem, anyways, other than what i have mentioned before, i'd like to think that the reason why he did all that for jill meadows, letting her into his house and even drinking the tea, that i think somewhere deep inside, he still wishes to be proven wrong, he still had the tiniest bit of hope that jill was good. honestly maybe i'm reading into this bit too much, but my reasoning for this is that, as you have seen, vyn is also capable of good, even in his little tsundere ways. he doesn't want to admit it, (caUSE HE'S SHY-//HIT) but his kindness is shown in the way he treats albie(the homeless man), and how he leaves his car keys for rosa. ANYWAYS, it wouldn't be so much of a stretch to think that vyn is a believer of "second chances" considering how he wanted to escape from his family, and i think his occupation as a psychiatrist kinda solidifies that theme as well.

the highlight of this chapter to me, was the confrontation between rosa and vyn, when vyn said something along the lines of "please trust me, even in this moment, please trust me," HURT ME SO BAD. (ESPECIALLY WITH THE WHOLE TEAM DISTRUSTING EACH OTHER, WHERE'S MY FOUND FAMILY HUU) it's the first for me to see vyn... this vulnerable, like how his heart is spilling out in this very moment right here. in which i also kind of find him hypocritical in this moment, but in a good way! vyn "distrustful and skeptical of others, extremely hesitant to ask for help" richter wants to be a reliable and trustworthy person. WHICH MAKES SENSE, being trusted by someone means that you hold some power against them. and trusting someone would mean that you'd have to open up and be vulnerable in front of them! so of course vyn would rather be trusted rather than trusting!!! GOD VYN RICHTER THE MAN YOU ARE.

anyways, yes this ended up being a vyn richter appreciation post. please excuse any inaccuracies in my knowledge of vyn-ology (sorry phd vyn-ology experts) your asks has just become a deposit for my rambles, I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND. I WILL NOW NINJA JUTSU MYSELF INTO THIN AIR. FWOOSH!!!!

WAHHH HI CHIKA and congrats on finishing main story 11!!!

this is such an interesting ask because i totes agree with your thoughts/feelings about the case itself. i too was HEAVILY unsettled by the case for those reasons you pointed out, but also because the victim was a child. if im remembering correctly, this is the first case we've had where it was a kid who died, our youngest casualty to the nxx cases thus far. the culprit being the old lady was also something that i didnt want to suspect. it's not that i hadnt suspected her, it was that i didnt want to entertain the fact that it couldve been her, like how you said it. in her intro scenes, i deeply felt for her and the story also makes you want to be on her side. shes sweet, shes polite, she struggles with tasks and has nobody else in this world. in a way, she was the perfect culprit because the emotional effect she has on the readers at first glance makes you not want her to be the one responsible, even when the evidence begins to point in her direction. it's been a while since i myself completed main story 11, but i couldve sworn that vyn himself said something along these lines too, that emotions can cloud one's judgement into disregarding the truth that starts to come out. while i havent watched the movie you mentioned, i totally agree like. she was such a good culprit because of how it was framed. it makes you think that overall, she wasnt a "bad" person, but one pushed to act. but at the end of the day she killed a kid, man. even if she supposedly didnt intend to and just wanted to "scare" her. just.....what a damn good case. i was really gripped by this one

now, onto your thoughts about vyn. i was FASCINATED by him in this chapter. everything im about to say onwards about vyn should be taken with a GREAT HEAP OF SALT, as the saying goes, because up til now, vyn is the nxx boy who i have the most trouble grasping which is wholly probably because ive read the least cards of him (in comparison to the amount of cards ive read for the other boys) but ksjbfljlfdsd ive pLAYED HIS PERSONAL STORIES COMPLETELY AT LEAST and you articulate well just why hes so fascinating to me in this chapter.

i like what you said "vyn's "self-sacrificing" act comes from pride and his inability to rely on others (in other words he views himself better than others)" but also i think theres another facet to it. i do think it partly comes from pride, but i also think it partly comes from fear. see, what i understand about vyn from previous stories ive read from him, particularly from his pre-anniv personal story 3 (iirc) is how he fears and hates being seen as anything other than perfect, or as someone who has flaws. it's not because he wants to be seen as better than everyone, it's that he cant handle being seen as lesser. he hates to be pitied. that being said, i ABSOLUTELY agree with your judgement of him sometimes....testing the goodness of people. something clear to me in the stories of his that ive experienced is that, if theres one thing that always surprises him, it's people's capacity to be good. it's what constantly takes him off guard with mc, it's why he didnt expect to fall in love with first sight at her. given his background and backstory (and uh, in this main story chapter in particular, given his family members lol) he just....operates under the vague notion that people will not be good. or that theyll fail it. and sometimes he tests whether or not that will happen, because one of vyn's constant questions that he asks in his actions, especially towards mc, is whether or not mc will trust him.

(sidenote: one of vyn's lines when you play old maid with him is something along the lines of "im glad to have won your trust" when you pick the card he tells you to pick and you win as a result. again, this act of testing another person's good will in his character, testing their trust. i think trust is a very key theme in vyn's character as a whole)

vyn's moments of vulnerability in this chapter was also SOOOOOOO YUMMY TO MEEEEE because if theres another thing i think about vyn, it's that he loathes being out of control. he likes being the expert strategist, he likes being able to sway the odds in his favor no matter what the situation is, in his personal story theres even an instance where he was behind the scenes orchestrating several events unbeknownst to mc. he likes being in control and so vulnerability is such a nightmare for him. personally, the highlight of this chapter to me was when vyn already got poisoned and mc was trying to help him throw up the poison, because even WHEN POISONED he was hesitant to have her see him like this. it's good whump, your honor. and also it's good writing.

anyhoo, thank you for this ask!!! i am NOT a vyn-ology expert, quite the opposite, but i do adore when he takes the front row seat in main stories because it's always a treat to see

#asks #khickuwa #tot spoilers #should i....still be adding that tag? it's been a good while since main story 11 dropped kBLKJLSF well just in case

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