#i'm late bc it's my mom's birthday but goddamn

[taetaespeaches]

i love bts so fucking much

[blindluck]

i didn't wanna reply over there cus this ended up getting rly long but there's this post by @shitpostingperidot and @marvelsassbutts about carol and maria's GNR concert in 88 and my brainworms got to making up hc after hc now all i think about is how that could've been the first time they got together despite mutually pining and coparenting monica for like 4/5 years or so anywayyy

idk if there's like a screenshot frame of monica's sword file or smth that shows her birthday in exact terms so i might be going on abt nothing here but listen

mcu wiki says she was born around june/october of 1983

it also says carol and maria met in their first year of AF academy "shortly after turning 18", so that's either late 1983 or early 1984, bc carol's birthday is late 65

which means monica was already in the picture by then 🥺🥺

what i'm thinking is maria got pregnant at around 17/18 and her parents took care of monica for the first year or so when she enlisted bc why wouldn't they

but as soon as she lands the test pilot job and starts making bank they're like "i love you so much and i'm very proud of you now here's your child go be her mom"

this is like in their 2nd or 3rd year of flight school so it catches everyone by surprise, and ofc higher ups use it as excuse to subtly and passive-aggressively ground maria on paid vacations and maternity leaves

obviously she sees right through the fake benevolent facade and overcompensates by not only refusing benefits, but taking on even bigger workloads

which then obviously gets her drained and exhausted and ofc carol notices and worries

she's been trying to give maria space through the whole ordeal but there's a line between giving you space and watching you get put through the wringer without doing anything

so she finally corners maria like "hey i know this is fucked up but maybe you could find another way to stick it to them without slowly killing yourself in the process can u pls just give me a call when it's too much to handle i am begging on my knees"

("my best friend, who supported me as a mother and a pilot when no one else did")

maria does slow down a bit but she still hesitates to call for help, until one particular hard night she cracks and carol gets there at flying speed to do chores and dinner and take care of monica while maria (a single mom in her early 20s who is also an overworked test pilot) finally gets some goddamn rest

(after changing monica's diaper tho bc apparently carol can't help with that)

from then on carol pretty much moves in with them

maria starts slowing down and taking care of herself and getting her due leaves and relying more on her parents and friends and she loves monica so much and things are so overwhelmingly good right now...............except for this one small carol shaped situation

they've been roommates before, you see, and maria is very aware she's been in love with this goobster for a minute

but she's also a black single mom in the US air force she really doesn't have to make things harder on herself so she's been trying rly damn hard to keep carol at arm's length for both their sakes

carol too is very aware that she's in love with maria and probably has been since forever (she's not super in touch with her feelings to pinpoint when the gears shifted, plus thinking back on it she can't rmbr a time when she wasn't in love with her yknow)

but "maria has a kid she's straight" (wrong) and also carol is very insecure (canon) so she's afraid of rejection and doesn't wanna ruin the friendship and she'd rather have maria in her life as a friend instead of not at all

even if it breaks her to wake up literally next to the love of her life every single day and not spill her entire heart out

especially bc maria's mask slips sometimes, mostly when she's drunk (even if just a bit tipsy) or when they share a particularly emotional moment (quite often tbf, considering how close to dying the very nature of their job gets them on a regular basis)

fast forward to 1988

carol and maria pretty much live together and monica loves auntie carol to pieces and their hearts are both so close to exploding they might actually die for real at any given moment

now to finally tie back to where this whole thing started: carol brings home tickets to a GNR concert, maria stares at her dead in the eye like "bitch this is 500 miles away" and carol's like "oh..........................road trip? :D"

you'll never guess what happens there

one year later, carol's missing

presumed dead

[lilithbasically]

Surprise

*Minors DNI*

DILF Kiri's birthday with his pretty little nanny

I'm late but this was for Kiri's birthday bc he's daddy as fuck😩

Warnings: bit of dacryphilia, pet names, degradation and praise, light choking, cum eating, mention of masturbation (m)

-DILF Kirishima who had spent the last few weeks being pestered and taunted by the rest of the BakuSquad

-"Shitty hair, if you don't make your move, I will."

-"Kirishima, how have you not fucked her senseless yet?"

-Kirishima hadn't yet made good on his promise to ruin you. He was just so goddamn busy.

-But you can be sure the first thing his mind drifted to at night was your little hands trying to wrap around his thick cock. Your lips struggling to fit him into your mouth.

-DILF Kiri who had a hard day at work and just wanted to come home to relax

-His pretty little nanny had already taken care of everything before he got there because you were just perfect like that

-"Hi, Mr. Kirishima. Your dinner is on the table, babies are at their mom's for their scheduled visit, and laundry is in the dryer. I'll be sure to fold it first thing tomorrow when I get here," you say with a sweet smile.

__________

Kirishima took you in for the umpteenth time this week, his eyes raking over you, "Whatcha got planned for tonight, Y/N?"

"Oh, nothing, Sir. I just didn't want to get in the way of any plans you may have." That signature sickeningly saccharine smile lighting up your features. God, he'd love to see his dick in your mouth.

"Plans? What makes you think I have any plans, sweetheart? And I thought I told you to call me Eijirou?"

"Right, I'm sorry, Si-Eijirou. I just figured you had plans since today is your birthday," you shrug.

"Mmhhmmm...I'm honored that you remembered," Kiri's heart clenched in his chest.

"How could I not, Eijirou? Red Riot has always been my favorite hero."

Hearing his hero name fall off your tongue made his cock twitch in his pants and he decided tonight would be the night he'd keep his promise.

"Would you like to join me for my birthday celebration then, Y/N?" Kiri asked, his eyes not once leaving your figure.

"I'd love to, Eijirou. But, you should probably open your gift first. It's waiting for you in your bedroom." Avoiding his eyes, you watch him walk to his bedroom and disappear around the corner.

Kirishima searches his room for any hint of a gift but finds nothing.

"Hey, Y/-," he starts then stutters, seeing you in a bright red, strappy set, standing in his doorway. "Oh holy fuck, Y/N," Kiri breathes.

"You feel like keeping your word then, Red Riot?"

__________

"Fuck...say it again, baby...let me hear it, c'mon," Kirishima panted. Thrusting his dick into you, you were losing yourself in the delicious burn the stretch his massive member provided. He slipped a hand down to toy with your clit as you moaned.

"Fuck, Red Riot, break me...please, daddy, oh god"

Flipping you over, positioning you to all fours, he slammed his dick into you so hard you jolted forward with a yelp. Grabbing the headboard with one hand, he wrapped his other around your throat using his grip as leverage to pull you to meet his thrusts and sink himself into you harder, his tip kissing your cervix with every thrust.

"Goddamn, Little One you feel better than I imagined you would...Been wantin to fuck your perfect little cunt since I first saw you...fucked my fist to the thought of you creaming on my cock..."

His admission made you fly over the edge, covering him in your release, your walls pulsing around him.

"Fuck...good girl, just like that. Ahhhh fuck, babygirl," he groaned, releasing your throat to move his hand down to rub tight circles over your clit, "Gimme another, Y/N...gimme one more then I'll fill you up"

"hnnnn...Kiri, I can't s'too much, daddy," you sobbed, tears falling down your cheeks.

"Aww, poor baby...," he said, false sympathy staining his voice. He leaned forward to lick one of the tear tracks before biting down on your neck. Moving his lips next to your ear, "You wanna be a good little slut for daddy on his birthday right? Wanna give me the best present, yeah? Then fucking cum, goddamnit...take this cock and fucking cum. You said you wanted to be broken so fucking break for me, whore"

"Oh, god...fuck...daddy" you wailed as your body shook with your release, clear liquid gushing from your cunt, soaking the sheets, his cock, and his legs.

"Good girl, good fuckin girl...fuck that was so hot...m'gonna cum, baby. Shit..."

Feeling him twitch inside you as he sped up his thrusts, you knew just the thing to tip him over, "Please fill me with your cum Red Riot, fuck me full, daddy"

"FUCK" Kirishima yelled, flooding your pussy. He watched as it gushed out around his cock, dripping down your thighs. Hissing as he pulled out, Kirishima scooped up the excess with two fingers, lightly pulling you to sit in his lap. "You know how much I hate being wasteful, pretty girl," he said, pushing his fingers between your lips, letting you suck his cum from them before pulling them away with a soft 'pop'.

Wrapping his arms around you, he pulled you down against his chest to lay down. You giggled a little, planting a soft kiss against his pec, and whispered a sweet, "Happy Birthday, Eiji."

Laying a kiss to the top of your head, he smiled, "Best fuckin present by far, babygirl."

_______________

@fatbitchgeek-blog @sunflowers-rae @whatever-the-fuck-i-dont-care @totally-not-bakus-hoe @zerisfelin @auphelia @katsukisdynamite

[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 2885

today was. not good.

got up, totally exhausted. didn't eat breakfast, didn't take my meds. but didn't need to go to windham. folded laundry, some of it is wrong bc mom folded it and it's bad times for my brain to have things folded wrong. went to see my aunt for her birthday - she loved the blanket i made her! my mom wants one too. so she's gonna get yarn and i'm gonna make her one too.

had to leave to nh etc to my eeg. went to the wrong place. got to the correct place too late. rescheduled. so i'm stressed and cranky and tired and things are shit bc i also still haven't heard back from the school.

i go home. i take a nap.

i wake up, i go get joel. i struggle but complete everything i need to get done, send emails and clean my inboxes and process paperwork so there's nothing left on my plate - it's all northeastern now.

had a frustrating discussion about student loans, about how i have a deadline for this school registration shit. not happy. joel gets upset. i get upset. so it's all shitty, all around. lisa made dinner. i didn't have much of any of it. later talked to joel when we'd both calmed down about what he wanted. i went on a wild goose chase for my beloved.

worth it.

picked up food and ice cream and food and came back and watched joel play a new spiderman game that he just got. it's really cool. also my echopraxia is 100% active watching video games. fucking wild. me moving like i'm a goddamn joystick while joel plays. it's actually really funny.

anyway, i worked in my planner a little bit before coming upstairs. i need a pink pen. i don't know where my pink pen is. i need it. it's gotta be a specific texture. i'm considering just getting a new set of the pens because the others are different textures when writing. it sucks. so i'm hoping to get some sort of consistency.

bleh.

i have a joel. i go to work tomorrow. i go to barnes and noble tomorrow with children. tomorrow is tuesday so i can feasibly drop off joel and go look for those pens at staples or whatever. i just. i need em. can't write without em.

or i could just go home, grab the other stickers, and look for my one pen and the rest of the pouch where i used to hold them. i don't even remember what i kept them in. i think it was my red paladin zip pouch? i don't remember.

i'm hoping i can sleep okay tonight. i'm beat.

petition to not have joel roll over on me in his sleep.

[weedkids]

DUDE WHY DID YOU HAVE TO BONE MY MOM THAT’S SO FUCKED UPPPPP

--

Kisa keeps breaking into the apartment that the weedkids share to visit her precious baby daughter <3. Emi's normal here, so she doesn't want this. She's been avoiding her insane mom the best she can. Because she's insane.

Wei comes back home from work one day and Kisa's there. She goes, "Oh, you're not Emi. You know when she’s coming in?"

Wei: "Idk in a few hours maybe"

Kisa: "oooh darn!! Just HOW are we gonna keep ourselves occupied in the meantime!!"

Wei: “....”

--

So yeah. She’s like, “hey girl wanna bone” and Wei is like “.....k sure”

She’s hot. So why not.

--

Wei's thinkin to himself "fuck fuck i'm gonna die but this isn't a bad way to go lol"

—

Emi walks in once seeing Kisa and Wei sharing a pizza and she thinks "damn that's kinda weird" but she's tired and she grabs a slice and goes into her room.

—

Emi gets a text from Wei. "Kisa's here. asked when ur coming home today"

Emi: "Oh thanks for letting me know. ig if she's there rn, i'll take my time getting over there I'll be back at 8p. Hopefully she gets bored and leaves. "

Wei: "k"

Then Wei turns to Kisa like 👌 "We got til 8." And they get 2 work.

But. Like, even though this text was really intended to Make Fucking Her Mom More Convenient, it's not like Emi's able to pick up Intentions from text. So she's like "huh.. Wei warned me about my mom being there.. that was pretty nice of him." (Wei gets a point in her book)

—

Emi starts treating him a little better bc he seems to understand her situation. Which, in turn, warms Wei up to her bc honestly all you really need to do to get on this guy’s good side is to be persistently nice to him.

As their relationship improves, Wei’s starting to think that maybe this is something he shouldn’t do, but then Kisa swings over like “Yahoo!! Today I’m not wearing panties lol” and his brain turns off. Clothes on the floor.

But after a certain point, Wei and Emi are on pretty good terms with each other, even though they’re not close. He didn’t care about Emi’s opinion before, but now that she’s kind of a friend (?), Wei’s paltry conscience is like ok fuck she can never know I fucked her mom

He takes to leaving the apartment whenever Kisa is there so that her coochie’s siren call doesn’t trap him. He gets pretty bored outside, so he explores the city a lot during this time. He ends up finding a lot of new places to take his friends to for hangouts, which adds more friendship points in this whole gang lol

Then Emi finds out a few years later and it ruins her whole brain. But by then it’s too late. They’re besties ^___^

—

Emi (distressed)(furious): wei u fucked the joker did u know that did u fucking know you fucked the joker back then

—

Kisa is horrifyingly too honest about her life, but it took her so long to spill the beans because Emi begged her to stop chattering about her sex life with no filter.

Kisa was running late to her visit to the apartment (though she technically can't be "late" if this visit was never planned in the first place? Emi didn’t know she's coming over)

and she was all like "HI EMIIII SOOOORRRYYYYY;;;;; I was really really busy ***[redacted. describing all sorts of nastyass shit, probably.]*** and then we just haaaaad to ***[redacted again]***... but i'm here now!!!! 💖 "

and Emi's just,, "god. god. god. god. mom. please dont tell me shit like this ever again please. god. God."

Kisa pouts but she tries (tries. lol.) to respect this!

A few years later, everybody’s moved out of that apartment and gone their separate ways. Emi’s in Boston for a school program. It’s goddamn cold here. It’s also her birthday. She’s got a fun day planned with her pals. Unfortunately, Kisa also decides to drop by to celebrate with her baby ^___^

She spots Wei's name in Emi's contacts (looking over her shoulder @ her phone without permission) and sees the little pic of him in the contact photo with some stupid snapchat filter on his face. “ooo u still talk to that girl? I remember him. His hole was pretty alright.”

Emi’s like, “What.”

Kisa's like, "Oh? I thought you didn't want me to tell about this stuff? Did you change your mind?" (Emi is speechless. It feels like she's about to fall in through the earth's crust)(Kisa starts rattling on about how when it was just the two of them and it'd take a while for anyone else to come home, she'd kill time with him by just fucking like crazy) (Emi hears only static)

Kisa’s like "I was soooo bored waiting for you!!! What else could I have done??" and Emi's like "I DON'T KNOW???? A FUCKING CROSSWORD PUZZLE OR SOMETHING? LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE???"

Emi is so betrayed. She’s never been so thoroughly betrayed in her life. So she gets utterly sloshed.

Later, Wei wakes up to his phone ringing. It’s 4am. Bleary eyed, he accepts the call. If Emi’s trying to contact him at this hour, it’s probably important. He immediately regrets it.