#i'm in way too deep

[elegantkittycat]

i'm watching never let me go and i actually like it and i just checked it on mdl and no one likes it in the comments? and i wonder

i mean, nevermind, to each their own but like, i saw some ppl bringing up palm, and i dunno, guess him not being all teary-eyed over his mother's death and such and i'm like. that's trauma for you. it has like, a million faces. and what, he's known that woman for a month or so? i'm not saying that to sound heartless, but it's a complicated relationship. she's never been there for him, and this time is not by choice either. of course she grew to like him, love him even, but that's a product of circumstance rather than intent, too. she would've been perfectly fine living all of her life without his son. and said son knows that. how painful that must be? it's complicated and i think it was carefully written and well-executed. Palm practically mourns a barely stranger. from his heart and from duty at the same time. a concept and a friend more, than a mother.

anyway,

the day my dad died, and after i was told through the phone i wrote a badass assignment in constitutional law. the best i ever did. i loved him dearly, don't misunderstand. his death destroyed my life and ruined practically everything in it. but you know, even after one year of it happening i don't think i had a grasp on reality much. i may even have joked some. trauma is weird as hell and Palm's reactions, his clinical attitude, his fits of depression and rage and then denial and his clinging to Nueng above anything else all rings relatable to me from my own traumas. but maybe i'm just a shitty human, who knows.

[and really this is just a side-note but Palm seems to be a guy who makes peace with bad facts of life and hardships thrown at him in a minute. he seems to accept the inevitability of suffering, of death, of lows and highs pretty easily and without much fanfare. i got a vibe from his character that he's like a deep, peaceful lake amidst the mountains. just there, calmly existing with everything. sure, when things ripple him badly he's ready to drown the offenders but it's not very personal. except in the case of Nueng.]

another one people seem to go on about, that Palm is a shitty bodyguard. i mean, yeah, really?? the whole point of the series is that he isn't a fucking bodyguard, he's just a boy who was dragged into this and fell in love, unfortunately. XD or is it just me who thinks that? i mean they point it out multiple times but idk. his dad was quite effective i think, for those what, seventeen years he protected Pipop but Palm is just a fisherboy. it is repeated like mantra throughout the show. in school they gossip about him being the son of the bodyguard forced to be around Nueng. which he technically is. Mrs. Tanya is using them both. Uncle Non's subservience and his willing sacrifices and his offering of a son Nueng's age. it's not a malicious abuse of power - it's subtle and seems justified and we're all so brainwashed alongside Uncle Non that we collectively forgot that that's a bad thing – wealthy people using us to their pleasure and convenience.... this show makes very strong points, (it seems way too subtly) imo.... and there's this strong implication in the first ep too, that Palm mostly grew up alone. he learned hard shit but his father was busy being an actual bodyguard in Bangkok, and he couldn't exactly teach his son that at the same time in some faraway village he grew up in... he must've been an absent father. of course Palm's terrible, it's a wonder he grew up to be this respectful and decent at all XD

also i'm not saying that Phuwin's and Pond's acting is the best I've seen but I don't know, tastes really do seem to differ cause i'm so uncomfortable with Chimon's acting (or presence, it's unclear at this point) omg. everyone has the hots for him and i'm just sitting here deeply uncomfortable. that's just a personal thing i guess but when i looked at his character first in this series (i never watched anything with him in it before) i thought he was fishy. and i just can't seem to shake that off. at first i thought it was the character but as it turned out he's a good guy. XD he gives me the creeps tho. idk, sorry man, i'm sure you're nice. maybe too nice. i can't believe a word he says. i'm so sorry.

oh but Perth is flawless. his is an outstanding performance and i'd love to see more of that but man if they really gonna have a series with Chimon i have to man up...

oh, and the Chopper's dad issue is a funny one too XD like, "the villain is so simple and his motivation is just money and he only talks and could've killed his sister-in-law a thousand times" etc...... i thought that was the whole point? like i seem to misunderstand everything here, but i truly genuinely thought that the villain being simple, kinda dumb and well, villain-y in a bad sorta way is intentionally disillusioned? that's why we know it's him from the get-go?! this is not supposed to be a mystery genius, this is to make us feel terrible and uncomfortable and uneasy, because that's the healthy real-life reaction to fucking criminals!? who murder their own family, no less. (i can't believe i'm saying this, being the biggest dark lord apologist in history but come on, this is not that type of fiction T_T ) he's like that because criminals are that simple sometimes?? they are big mouthed bullies sometimes? there is a reason he wasn't high up in the hierarchy and his brother looked down on him and never allowed him to manage big things?? because he's unstable, he's all talk, he's hateful, pitiful and a little dumb?? and that's a villain for you? also you wouldn't believe the LENGTHS simple people are willing to go for money... money is never an unworthy motivation, it's one of the single most important ones for criminals, business owners, bankers, bakers, kids, adults, actors and actresses', doctors, writers, your fave youtubers, moms, dads, uncles, mob bosess... you get the picture. duh.

(for me Uncle Kit's character was actually nice after the endless romanticization of criminals ~ i'm not looking at you kinn/porsche, i love you {kinda} but I'M SIDE-EYEING YOU. WTF WAS THAT AND WHY??!? SO FUCKING SICK AND TWISTED AND SORRY GIRLS but criminals are not all sweaty-sexy misunderstood and miseducated and mentally whacky and forced by their daddies but still somehow genius Vegas'?????? whatever the plural of this name is, i'm making grammar up as i go, sorry, rant over, i love you Vegas BUT WTF ~ )

all in all, i'm vibing to something entirely different than the rest. as per usual, i guess.

i especially loved Palm's mother and the difficult to swallow life lessons packed up in there. motherhood, self-love, selfishness, children, responsibilities, desires, duty, suffocation in a loving relationship, personal freedom... that was a good one. never seen that before in a thai bl either. you either have the devoted parent or the angry not so agreeable but ultimately i-love-you-and-i'm-here-for-you parent. but an absent parent by choice....... i felt like she was brilliant.

and i love Nueng's mother too. the very little we've seen of her is amazing. strong, no-nonsense but with a heart. devoted to her family, ready to kill for them but ultimately she's the one who gets almost killed. she seems the complete opposite of Palm's mother but not at the same time and i'm here for it, okay? i'm in love with that.

also i gotta admit that i haven't watched ep.11 yet but i just cracked up a little and this rant felt good to let out. sorry not sorry

and i would like to emphasize it: this post does not have an agenda to convince you to love a series that you don't enjoy or anything. we are all allowed to feel differently about everything under the sun (and above it and beyond). this is just my singular experience with a piece of media, wich provoked strong feelings and made me think about many aspects of humanity.

[flickering-nightfall]

Some bugs for fun!

[revvethasmythh]

You know, I think there's something so, so insidious to the idea that Orym's perspective of the Vanguard is "flawed/human" or that him repeatedly reminding his friends what the Vanguard does (kill innocents to achieve their means) "blocks nuance" in the conversation, etc, because it implies that, in this mythical "objective" perspective that apparently exists, the Vanguard aren't so bad. If only Orym could put aside his petty grievances, such as the murder of his father and husband, and let people be nuanced about this situation, he'd see there's two sides to this story. And why discount the Vanguard's perspective just because *checks notes* they're a massive, manipulative cult that preys on vulnerable people to join their ranks and turns them to violence, or that they work with a centuries-old fascist eugenicist literally mind-controlling psychic government with the goal of freeing a creature that could very well destroy the world as we know it and even if it doesn't, will leave an enormous power vacuum for that fascist government to potentially occupy when they invade Exandria?

I think there's some misconception people have that they think war shouldn't ever be personal and if it does become personal for someone then their logic is too clouded by their feelings to see the situation clearly, just automatically. And perhaps sometimes, in some contexts, this can be true! But not here. It's actually quite cut and dried that Orym's "flawed, human" perspective is the one reminding everyone of the human cost to Ludinus' grand plans, all in the name of so called "progress"

[lannee]

something's got a hold of me lately .

[a-most-beloved-fool]

there are many neat reptilian characteristics that one can give Cardassians. I've seen shedding scales, tails and claws, scent marking, and people making them ectothermic.

but consider:

Color changing ridges. Just for funsies. We already tend to headcanon that the ridges and spoons (chula, if you prefer) turn blue when aroused, mimicking the make up they wear in canon, but it would be a bit interesting if the ridges were Fully color changing, a la chameleons. Especially if they changed color based on emotions.

Because their culture is very focused on the Good of the State, it would probably be taboo to have your emotions plainly visible (too much risk of your colors giving away the fact that you aren't 100% content blindly serving the state). I think it would be typical to wear make up to cover up the color changing scales, or to wear paint in 'positive' colors.

Soldiers and the Obsidian Order might even find a way to chemically neutralize the color changing, either temporarily or permanently - it could be far too much of a liability, if someone got captured and interrogated.

Most non-Cardassians would be entirely unaware that this was a normal part of Cardassian physiology. Novels might have oblique references to the colors when describing emotions, but any book that spoke too clearly of them would be almost sure to get banned. Bashir would be slowly taking notes about which colors in novels seemed to correspond to which emotions, but he'd have no idea that it was because Cardassians could Literally Turn Those Colors. He'd just assume their color theory was different, and that they were Really into color metaphors for some reason.

Could be interesting to explore the cultural implications and see what kinds of new mischief happens on the station due to it.

[uncanny-tranny]

To my fellow US Americans: If you are planning on arming yourselves because of the election results and what might be on the horizons, I urge you to be a responsible gun owner.

Take as many classes as you can. Get certified in gun safety, even if it's not required to own a gun in your state. Get a gun safe. A good gun safe. Lock your gun up. Don't leave it armed. Don't wave your guns or gun-owning status around and don't pose with guns like they're toys. I'd say not to make gun buying an impulse purchase, either. You are investing in something that holds great potential risk to yourself and others - treat it like a responsibility.

I'm not here to argue about if Americans ought to exercise the second amendment in the way it currently exists. That's not the point - we have always had the second amendment, and I doubt it's going anywhere. I am more interested in making sure we don't see a surge in accidental, negligent gun ownership.

As a queer person in the US, I can understand the mindset behind people's spiked interest in arming themselves. I'm not arguing against that. As a child of gun owners, I know just how huge a responsibility it is to own a gun, and I hate the general attitude we Americans have about guns. Please don't contribute to that. If you own a gun, it is you inherent responsibility to take care of that gun (which is why I can't own a gun yet - I don't have the resources to pour into proper ownership).

[guinevereslancelot]

what was with cameron house md she spends 90% of the episode saying she wants their patient to die bc he's a genocidal dictator and her colleague husband says "babe it bothers me for ethical reasons that you want our patient to die :(" and she said "hm maybe you're right :/" but when it comes down to it the genocidal dictator lays a finger on her in an aggressive manner and chase instantly commits medical malpractice to murder the guy and then when he tells her she LEAVES HIM bc boo hoo he's a murderer now like GIRL he killed a man for you!!! he's wracked with catholic guilt!!! he's being crushed beneath the weight of his sins because he chose his devotion to you over his devotion to god!!! he literally could not get any sexier at this moment in time!!!

[arttsuka]

I LOVE Teen Stan and Ford, it’s sad they don’t get drawn enough, so thank you so much!

Does Ford ever help Stan when he gets overstimulated? Or maybe when he has a rage response and suddenly starts crying and calls himself stupid?

Here's the other post with Ford

[tippenfunkaport]

That viral post that's going around about how people who write "book quality" mlm fic are too "normal" to publish and have real jobs so only "weird" people publish their "shitty" fanfic is so completely out of touch with reality and I am giving a massive side eye to everyone reblogging it.

Not only is it completely, easily verifiably untrue (you cannot enter any professional writing space without tripping over a dozen grizzled scifi writers who got their start by filing off the serial numbers and publishing their Star Trek fanfic even going back decades ago??? it's a whole thing?? plus how can you look at the mlm category on Amazon right now and say with a straight face that people aren't publishing shitty Spirk and Stucky fanfic??? Oh, honey...) it's also the perfect example of this kind of sneering elitism that true artists would never sully themselves by seeking profit, they do it only for the purity of the thing that always somehow leads back to, "no one should be paid to make art, actually."

The only reason you're seeing more published fanfic right now has nothing to do with the idealistic purity of your hypothetical government employee written smut of the past vs the debased scribbles of those awful straights of today and everything to do with the fact that a) self-publishing has created a voracious readership that wants a ton of content so it's become a viable, flexible income stream for many, especially disabled people b) anyone can publish now with self-publishing tools so there are less gatekeepers and c) lockdown got a lot of people into fandom and therefore writing who never tried it before.

And if you really think there's no "shitty" published mlm and no "book-quality" m/f writing out there that started as fanfic, then you are clearly not a reader so why are you even talking about this?

[sleepsucks]

[total-drama-brainrot]

some sketches based on the personality swap au

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Master manipulator vs Master manipulator

 [First] Prev <–-> Next

[books-books-smolderinglooks]

"Lookin' at you got me thinkin' nonsense, cartwheels in my stomach when you walk in.." 💜❤️

[gods-perfect-idiots]

❤️💛

[vaguelyaperson]

as much as i understand shigaraki's death, narratively speaking, i'm also so goddamn tired of society needing martyrs.

what made me fall in love with shigaraki is that he's an excellent villain. all his character development built towards him becoming a more competent, driven, effective villain. he became an incredible symbol of fear just as deku became an incredible symbol of peace. this is who he was, in entirety. there is nothing else shigaraki could be.

when shigaraki told izuku, in his final moments, to pass on the message to spinner that "shigaraki fought to destroy until the very end," it really emphasized how it would have dishonored him to be vegeta'd, as it were.

shigaraki made it his mission to tear down hero society. this was his noble mission. this is what made him a hero to the league of villains. because he saw the systemic evils, he saw the evils that hurt his friends, and sought to destroy it all.

there's something to be said about trying to change someone who doesn't want to change, but for shigaraki, it was more than just trying to rehabilitate him from mass murdering. because to him, and the league of villains, what he was doing WAS the right thing. to tell shigaraki not to destroy would be akin to telling deku not to save. "you may not understand, but that's what makes me the villain."

there was a binary choice here: either he'd be left free to complete his mission and destroy everything, or he'd be stopped, permanently.

Izuku, by reaching tenko's heart, but ultimately stopping shigaraki, was choosing the only third option he had: declaring that he would not let all of society be destroyed, but not without promising that he'd do everything he can to reform it here on out.

shigaraki destroys. deku saves.

that's it. that's the bnha narrative in its most basic foundation. horikoshi did not fail to tell that story.

I think what ultimately fucking sucks about this ending is that it's too realistic. society often DOES need a martyr - or often martyrs - to realize that they fucked up, that they let an evil persist too long. they need a shocking enough tragedy to point to and swear they'll never let it happen again. society needs to be rocked to its very core before people can be motivated to get their heads out of their asses and work together towards reforms.

and that in itself is an evil, that people can't see how much harm they're causing or condoning without some horrific tragedy.

i think we're all mad at horikoshi for failing to follow through on the story because we didn't WANT the realistic ending. we wanted the hopeful one. the against all odds one. we didn't want another story about society using the image of martyrs to get its shit together. because we already know that story. and we're so so so tired of it.

especially when we know it only leads to a temporary peace.

because people forget. they put in enough reforms to feel good, and then get comfortable and ignorant again. when does that cycle end? when can we finally notice the evil in time to PREVENT it? so that everyone, 'heroes and villains,' get a happy ending?

I think our anger with the bnha ending is good. we want different - not just in fiction, but in real life. we're willing to hope for different. we should hold onto hope and fight for different.

[uncanny-tranny]

I jokingly thought before that reading Junie B. Jones as a kid turned me into a feminist, but unironically, it kind of did.

I honestly think it comes down to the fact that Junie B. was not only allowed to be "weird," but her character arc never concluded like other girl characters would. In other media featuring "weird girls," the girl always ended her arc tamed - by force or convince, she would be prettied up, she would smile and be polite, and she would never speak out of turn. She would be perfect then, and would shed her veneer of individuality with the freedom that is conformity. As a kid, I noticed that girls weren't permitted to be "weird" like boys were. So when I read Junie B. Jones, I loved that she was frankly just fucking weird. She said things out of turn, she was rambunctious and imaginative and she was a realistic portrayal of a little girl. I loved reading those books because the narrative taught her lessons without punishing her for being weird, if that makes sense. So often, narratives punished weird girls for the crime of being a socially unacceptable girl, not for any true wrongdoing like lying.

Anyway, I just think it's interesting, because I watched and read a ton of books and shows and movies featuring girls and women, but none of them truly empathized with (or even tried to empathize with) weird girls on their own merits and capabilities and terms, or embraced the idea of a "socially inept/unacceptable" girl without punishing her in some way for her supposed ineptitude.