#i'm gonna let you write cause i'm out of mind brain everything now

[yesyes-crazyparty]

📸:madmaria86 on instagram

[wayfayrr]

hey uh. if requests r open. would it b possible to request a follow up to that self-aware-twi fic. if not thats ok i just wanted u to know i havent stopped thinking about it since i read it. altered my brain chemistry, touch-starved twilight princess link my beloved, etc etc. ur writing is top-tier <3<3<3

I think the best part about this ask is - I've had this written since early January. I actually wrote part two as a birthday gift for a good friend of mine @glowyskull <33

So this is more just me finally posting it sfbgdfbgdb. it's also funny to think that the twilight fic is my most popular fic now considering how the self aware au really started as just a really guiltily self indulgent fic - something fun to write that I didn't think could get as big as it did on my blog. and I'm glad that you liked it so much <333 whimpery touch starved twilight princess link is just so AUGH love him so

[masterlist]

“Oh you’re finally wakin up then darlin’.”

“...hmm?”

“C’mon darlin’, you can’t have forgotten what happened earlier already? Can you? Your fever - cold isn’t that bad so you can't have…”

Who’s rambling… and why does it sound so familiar?  Wait does that mean - is everything that happened earlier all real then, did link really crawl out of my tv just because he was lonely. Because I left him there, left him all on his own to rot in his own solitude. 

“Link? You - that - everything was real then? All of it?”

“All of it darlin’, from how I got out to how I’m never gonna leave ya.”

“Huh..? I could’ve sworn that you didn’t even mention anything like that…”

“Mhm, well you’re ill and still a little out of it darlin’ so you probably just forgot, you did agree though.” 

It does sound like something that I would agree to, I mean I’m the reason that he’s sentient. It would be cruel of me to throw him to the other wolves, he isn’t from here but besides even that, he isn’t from here. He doesn’t know how this world works, it would be worse than sending a dog to a shelter. It would be his death sentence for certain, and after all that I put him through for a simple pause in playing. The way he’s petting my hair like this though, it’s enough to simply just wash the rest of my worries away, if I could I would spend the rest of my life right here easily.  

“About your illness though, do you have any red potion anywhere?” 

“No, no things like that don’t exist here link and the painkillers I have aren’t worth moving for.” 

“If you’re sure… I’ll go and get them for you the second you change your mind.”    

“You don’t even know where I keep them.” 

His hand paused at that, causing me to let out an involuntary whine. I couldn’t even think to stop it with how it slipped out instantly, which he seemed fond of. Cuddling me closer to his chest and resting his head on top of mine, with what felt like a giant smile on his face. 

“I can look for them, It’s not like I won’t need to learn where everything is now that I’m living with ya… besides I’ve already put you through so much stress when you’re not well.”

“You didn’t mean to link, how could you have known I was sick?”

“...I don’t know - I just - it shouldn’t have been hard to know with how you looked when you opened the game. I’m sorry love I just wasn’t even thinking I just wanted to be out, but I should’ve been more considerate to you.”

With how silent he is in the game you could never have guessed how much he likes to ramble, it’s the second or third time it’s happened since he crawled out of the glas- the glass. Are his bandages holding up, he seems fine but he’s not from here, any infection could be deadly. He wouldn’t even see it coming with how much he’s fawning over my comfort right now. 

“Link?” “Yes, darlin’?”

Oh wow, he - well he’s whipped already. Is it real love or has all that time trapped alone twisted him into this. I’d look into getting him therapy but… if he mentioned the truth then it would be a matter of seconds until he’d be diagnosed with something inaccurate. No one. No one at all would ever believe that a video game character actually broke out of their game - especially not someone like Link falling for an exhausted student like me.

“Are you feeling alright? You have so many cuts and wounds right now.”

“It’s nothing that’s worse than anything else I’ve ever had. They do feel more real though.”

“...real?”

“They feel like real wounds, not something that could be healed away in seconds and they’re just tiny scrapes.”He sounds so giddy as he’s talking about being hurt - it’s unnerving when he starts holding me even tighter when he’s saying it. I don’t think I’m ever going to be getting away from him ever again… if I wanted to. Why shouldn’t I take a chance at having a relationship though. He cares about me - he really does even if it’s unhinged - it would be so nice to come home to him, to be able to spoil him and be spoilt by him. Even being held like this feels so unreal, so impossible that I shouldn’t be here with him. So much so that I want to stay here and fall back asleep without any argument. Didn’t he even say he wanted to be my lover? Why look over a gift too closely?

[moonsaver]

THANK YOU FOR READING MY RAMBLE ABOUT THIS SLUTTY MAN, I have love-hate relationship with Ratio :3 (YOUR WRITING IS AMAZING AS ALWAYS)

BUT ALSO, ANOTHER RAMBLE HERE CAUSE YOU'RE MY FAVORITE WRITER!!

I don't know if you feel uncomfortable/weirded out with this, but if you do! Please do delete this if you want, it's your choice!!

Imagine a child, it can be one of those children in Penacony or other planets. But I pick the child from the Penacony! Walking up to Ratio and S/O, who is probably bickering as per usual or just enjoying one of another times (Secretly, since Ratio wants to be a secretive or this is same past-rebelious but now Professor S/O!)

As the child tugs on S/O, calling them pretty and hugs them. THEN PROCEEDED TO BE LIKE "kay now, you're my parent/mother/father"

LIKE:

"Hey miss/mister/mx! You look very pretty/handsome/unique! Will you be my parent?"

IMAGINE RATIO REACTION, *IF* THE KID IS GONNA BE LIKE

"oh, you're going to be my dad as well/other father/other parent!

OR THE OTHER WAY, HOGGING S/O ATTENTION. Clinging On S/O, regardless how many times S/O tries to get the kid back at their actual and real parents here, and would sometimes spend time hanging out with the kid while also trying to search for the kid parent

(AND ALSO I'M GOING TO SEND SOME RAMBLE ABOUT ROBIN (if you Dont mind!) MY BABY DESERVES THE BEST)

Hello anon! Always happy to answer brain rots and imagines and rambles hehe. Glad to see you back in my inbox!

Also, so cute hehe.

I imagine Dr. Ratio is actually pretty good with kids. The thing with kids is most of them love asking a shit ton of questions, the most ridiculous kinds at that. And you know those people who are so damn smart and knowledgeable in their field they start thinking about possibilities of ridiculous ideas as actually plausible? Veritas would kind of teeter on that when it comes to kids and their imagination. I just can't help but imagine kids crawling all over him while he has a rubber duck in his hand and explains like.. hawking radiation to a kid who's just staring blankly at him.

Honestly, kids would love him. Hes the strange, serious man who always bends down and tells you really confusing but fun stuff about things and seems to know everything. To them, hes the "actual adult".

I imagine, in the case a lost child approaches him or him with his s/o, his first instinct would be just to gauge the general state. He'll simply watch as you pick up the kid and coo at him and all the willy nilly stuff, just glancing over and checking for injuries, signs of anxiety or confusion, frustration, or fear. After he's done looking over, he'd try to ask the child about where their parents are when they perk up about how both of you are their parents now.

Well.. he doesn't know how to respond. You see his eyebrows raise slightly at the kid's remark, but he brushes it off, and starts telling the child all about your embarassing history if you were the rebellious professor!s/o. If you aren't, just about any silly memories he has of you are at the tip of his tongue, and that you really aren't suited for a parental figure. Even if you try and shut him up, he'll simply turn to the kid like, "do not let those who oppress you, silence you." Or something lol.

He doesn't mind the child being all over his s/o, telling them how pretty they are, asking them if they want to be their parent, and so on. Kids are silly, and illogical. It's in their nature to say anything that comes to mind. Of course.. he's slightly sour inside that your conversation was cut short, and now the child's hogging all your attention, but he vehemently pushes it down, simply resolving to search for their parents with you.

It's not soon before the both of you finally find them. Veritas gives them a stern, subtle warning about losing their child while you comfort them, bidding your farewell. It slightly annoys Veritas when the child clings to you, refusing to let go, and all his parents do is laugh it off, saying "they're just very social!" Or something. He has better things to be doing, really. He just walks off and lets you take care of things from there.

If you ask him if he's jealous, he won't say anything, and stare deadpan into your eyes before shrugging it off and changing the topic back to what you both were discussing before. Both of you can have more productive conversations, really.

Although.. his thoughts teeter a bit, and he shortly ponders over what kids with you would be like.. would he want children? Maybe one.. or two.. or even three..

Ugh, he's thinking too far ahead. He resigns to simply paying attention in the present, and listening to you ramble instead.

[aryxchse]

beach talks / percy jackson x mortal! fem! reader.

a / n : and here i thought i wouldn't write anything mortal x demigod trope,,,, but yeah my brain is screaming ideas to me from all of the bf asmr's and percy jackson's hot self i keep up with. and please let demigod's have magical phones!!

warnings : crying, cuteness overload, suprisingly i didn't cursed?? childhood friends to strangers (?) to lovers, first love, enchanted to meet you fr

oh how you missed perseus jackson.

yancy academy was something traumatising for the both of you, but percy made it easier to survive. he was fun, sarcastic, cute, and had the most gorgeous sea green eyes.

you two loved sneaking out from the school, just to visit beach. you both loved the sea, but you knew he loved it more than you. whenever he was near the ocean, he would always be more calmer.

his eyes would change the color according to the sea, or you we're just so in love with his eyes that you romanticised it in every way.

so when he called you last night, to ask you if you would meet up at the beach you always visited back then, you couldn't say no. instead, you laughed and said 'you always loved to be near the ocean anyways.'

you were so mad at him, so mad. you said you wouldn't leave him when he got expelled, but instead, he left you. he dissapeared without saying anything. and years later, the last week of the summer before collage starts, he reached to you.

and you're so, so mad at yourself for agreeing to meet up with him.

but then again, the way you missed and loved him was more powerful than your anger.

the beach was the same as the last day you arrived here. two years after percy got expelled and didn't even answered any of your calls that time, dissapearing. you were 14, now returning as 18.

you saw a familiar boy sitting on the sand, hugging his knees and watching the ocean with a calm look on his face. he had the same messy raven hair and sharp features with the boy you were in love with when you were 12.

"percy?" you called softly, approaching the boy. he immediatly turned to you, bright sea green eyes piercing your soul.

oh, those sea green eyes.

"oh gods, y/n," he said, stooding up. you tried to pay no mind to him saying 'gods' instead of 'god.' since he hugged you like he was going to break your ribs. "i missed you so much."

the tears were already showing themselfs in your eyes. man, you really loved this boy. as you hugged him back, the change in his appearence made you sad. because you weren't there to see it, to tease him for how quick he got taller or how ripped he was now.

he was more tan, he had many, many scars on his body. he smelled like salt water and wow, he was so much taller than you now. not to mention of how bigger his body get. was he in the military or something when he was gone?

"thank you for coming," he said, pulling away to look at you. his smile was bright like you remembered, so strong that always making people mirror his expression. "i really appreciate it."

"well, i deserve an apology right?" you said, sitting next to his previous place on the sand. he sat next to you, expression.. guilty.

"you deserve much more than that," he said quietly, meeting your eyes. you avoided them, 'cause if you didn't, you would scream: it's okay! i forgive you handsome!

"what are you waiting for then?" you asked, watching the ocean. "make up for it jackson."

and with that, he began to tell you everything. he knew he didn't have to hide anything from you, and how you we're a little mythology obsessed. it did suprised you, but you didn't showed it.

"and i knew i had to reach you after the last war because," he said, meeting your eyes again. this time, you looked back at him. "there's not gonna be any prophecy soon."

a sigh escaped your lips, as a way of process everything. "first of all, i'm mad." you said, and percy groaned in sadness. "because i would've helped you through everything, i would try my best."

"i know," percy whispered. "but i didn't want to put you in danger, you're important to me."

good one, you thought. he sure learned how to make a girl melt.

"second of all," you ignored his comment. "i guess i can forgive you since, you saved the world and all." he chuckled at your joke, finally relaxing his shoulders.

"you- you're not freaked out?" he finally asked. and you shook your head.

"you knew i always had a thing for supernatural stuff," you said with a shrug, smiling at him. he smiled back, squinting his eyes because of the sun. "yeah, i know." he nodded.

"so uh," you avoided his gaze again. "got any girlfriends? you've been gone for too long, we need to make up for it."

you were actually scared to ask this question, because you couldn't had a boyfriend after him. you didn't know why, but you were so loyal to him that you didn't even loved someone after him.

"no." he said. "i never loved anyone like i loved you."

oh gods, you thought. did he read my mind? how can we be this same?

"you-" you stuttered. "you- what?" he chuckled, pinching your cheek.

"guess i skipped the part were my fatal flaw is loyalty," he explained. "i had the biggest crush on you when we were 12, and i couldn't forget about you ever since. i knew i had to be with you, so i won the wars and didn't die, just to return to you."

the pinching turned into caress, and the next thing you knew was you were in his arms. "perseus jackson," you whispered, tears rolling down. you hated when you were filled up with this much emotion. "you're really the worst first love."

he only smiled, like he knew the feelings were mutual. and deep down, he did. all those years, he knew he was going to reach you and make you his one day. just when all of the stuff was over, like now.

"i know pretty," he murmured, resting his forehead against yours. he kept caressing your cheek gently, and your noses brushed every once in a while. "but i'm gonna make up for it, i swear it on the river styx."

[coolyum]

𓍯𓂃 𝓟ink 𝓟ony 𝓒lub

warnings : probably ooc dallas, fem!reader, mention of puke, mention of hooking up (nothing happens), hungover!reader, kindahungover!dallas, i've never been hungover b4 so i'm really bad at writing it, not proofread

pairing : dallas x reader

your vision was blurry as you slowly woke up, everything seeming dull at first. your eyes felt heavy and your mind felt fuzzy. a headache hit you like a train, pulling a soft, raspy groan from your throat. that's when you heard a similar sound from beside you. a little grumble could be heard followed by the rustling of bedsheets, causing you to lazily turn your head.

you could just tell that you were going to be so hungover today. your brain hurts, your stomach aches, your limbs are asleep. it feels awful. but you try to focus on whoever is laying next to you at the moment. you blink heavily, but even with blurry vision, you can see that it's a boy. not just any boy, dallas winston.

what's dallas winston doing here? why is dally laying next to you? you furrow your eyebrows and rub your eyes. you don't even notice he's awake until he says something to you.

"you feelin' better?" he mumbles, sleep evident in his voice. he's probably hungover, as well. his head rests against the pillow, and you can't help but notice at his position that he's not wearing a shirt. he's still wearing his signature necklace, though. you can't help but wonder something. it may be awkward, but you're too sleepy and hungover to care much. for now.

"did we hook up?" you ask, lazily forcing yourself over onto your side. you can't even make sense of how you feel. you've never drunkenly hooked up with someone before so you don't know how it'd feel the next morning.

a low chuckle comes from dally's throat. he shakes his head. "nah, we didn't. i wouldn't take advantage of ya like that."

it was a nice reassurance. your eyes slowly adjusted to the light streaming through his bedroom window. this is when you realize you're in his bedroom, in his bed.

"why am i in here?" you ask softly, genuinely wondering but also too tired to comprehend too much information.

dally caught this, so he made sure to keep his answer simple and understandable for your poor hungover brain. "you were really drunk. you ended up blackin' out so i brought you up to my room."

you let out a half-assed mumble in response. your eyes slowly closed as you couldn't keep them open any longer. you slightly adjusted yourself, pulling blanket up a little bit higher. that's when dally reaches out to gently brush something off your collarbones. he lets out a little grunt.

"damn glitter won't come off," he complains, giving up on getting it off of your chest.

at this point, your body feels aware of the body glitter you sprinkled on yourself the night before, and the makeup still on your face. you'll take care of it when you feel better. your shirt is slipping off of your shoulder, but then you realize it's not your shirt as you become more and more aware.

you open your eyes tiredly and look down to see if it's any of your shirts. nope. it's a simple, oversized black tee. dally notices how you look kind of confused. he finds it endearing. he finds you endearing.

"oh yeah, you puked all over your shirt last night so i gave you mine."

dally is acting kind of unusual. at least in anyone else's eyes. he's not the kinda guy to leave a severely drunken girl to fend for herself, but he's also not the kinda guy to care to the point of bringing her to his room to make sure she's alright. you, of course, couldn't grasp that information at the moment.

"think i'm gonna puke again," you say simply, the sickness evident in your voice. dally sits up, gently pulling you up with him. he's sure to be careful as he attempts to hold your limp body in his arms and pick you up without causing more sickness. he knows you need some time to sober up and feel better.

he brings you to the bathroom successfully, gently holding your hair back as you bend over the toilet. although he's this tough guy or acts like one for everyone to see, he cares about you. you and him aren't that close, so he sees pampering you today as an opportunity to get to know you better. he's never felt like this before. he's tried to avoid it, but now, he knows he can't. so as he holds your hair back and rubs his hand up and down your cold back, he realizes that this is almost if not completely at your lowest. he wants to see you at your worst and at your best. he's seen both. he knows he likes both. he wants both.

he's willing to try for you, even if it just starts with making sure you don't get sick and you sober up today.

xoxo,

coolyum!

[withahappyrefrain]

Talking about pegging Jake is not good while I’m OVULATING ugh fuck, he’s such a baby back bitch..I want to ruin him and put him back together..just want to BREAK him and stitch him back up..ending up sucking on my tits (oral fixation) (Did I just write this🫣🤭)

Edging Jake would be so delightful. He tries to appear unbothered, even commenting he could go "all night."

But after the fifth edge? He's a blubbering mess. His words are slurred as he begs you to let him come.

"I don't know," your fingers lightly graze his hard cock, eliciting a desperate whine from him, "Are you going to be a good boy?"

"Y-yes." He has tears in his eyes. Jake is willing to do anything for you. His hips are jerking erratically, practically humping the air. Any shame he had was gone.

Hesitantly, you prop his knees up to his chest, "You gonna apologize to everyone tomorrow?"

He nods desperately, "Yes! I'll, I'll do it tomorrow."

The head of the silicone cock brushed against his hole, making him drop his head back, sighing out of relief.

But the relief quickly turned to panic when he realized you hadn't moved, only the tip was in.

Jake needed it all.

"Who are you gonna apologize to? Tell me."

Jake briefly thinks about pushing himself down on the strap on. He has the strength, his hands are free.

But the potential punishment stopped him.

Instead, he merely whimpered, hoping those green eyes would garner sympathy from you.

"I'll give you a hint baby. It's five people. Name all five and I'll let you come."

A frustrated groan escaped Jake's lips. Your eyes narrowed and you pulled your hips back, beginning to leave him-

"B-Bradshaw!" You smiled, thrusting forward slightly.

"Good boy. Now name the rest."

"N-Nat?" His brain was scrambled. All he could think about was you, how you were ever so slowly filling him up.

"Three more."

"P-Reuben?" Jake's brain tried to think back to today's earlier events, which was what caused him to be lying on his back in the first place.

"Two more." Your hips move closer towards the back of his thighs.

Jake practically sobs, trying to think through the haze who else he offended.

"M-Mav?" His voice is weak, body shaking.

It's a delicious sight to witness.

You pull away, ignoring his cries, "No baby. He deserved that. But you should thank him for saving your neck."

You giggled as his body squirmed. Leaning over, your mouth captured one of his hard nipples, your hot tongue swirling around the hardened bud.

When met with Jake's groans, you simply tsked, not even bothering to hide your smirk. Why should you? He knew you delighted in this just as much as him.

"C'mon baby, gimme two more names." The head of the silicone cock now brushed against Jake, teasing.

After all, he needed to focus.

Your thumb wiped across the slit on the head of his cock, relishing in the groan the pretty blonde man made. Jake was putty in your hands. While getting up and walking away was possible, the thought never crossed his mind.

Your other hand gripped the base of the strap on, guiding it towards where Jake wanted it the most.

"Two more names Jake. I'm waiting."

His whole head felt fuzzy. With each minute that passed he slipped further and further into that headspace. It's what he craved, what he needed. It was why he always acted so bold and brash. From the first day you met him, you knew he was silently begging for someone to put him in his place.

He still wrestled with it, the idea of fully submitting himself to someone else. It went against everything he had been told, everything that had been ingrained in his head from the beginning.

A harsh thrust, filling him completely sent the pilot gripping the bed sheets. His hips thrashed against the mattress, struggling to adjust to the size.

The privilege of time had been revoked several edges ago. You pulled your hips back, only to thrust forward again, building up a fast rhythm.

"S'good." Jake was a withering mess underneath you, a far cry from the cocky man from earlier. From how his cock twitched to his knuckles turning white, you knew he was close.

"I know. Such a shame."

He's so lost in pleasure your words don't even register. No, it's not until you abruptly pull out, leaving him empty and desperate that Jake realizes what's happened.

"I told you baby. Two more names."

[daisykihannie]

Heyo!! I was wondering if you could write a smut with Felix and a FtM reader? Just your typical vanilla smut I don’t see this man doing anything else /imo . (Idol AU)

𝙵����𝚝𝚎 | 𝙻.𝙵𝚇

pairing: idol!Felix x ftm!reader

warning: porn with too much plot, vanilla, soft, sweet, making love not fucking, NSFW

a/n: I'm sorry it took me a few days to write! I'm also sorry there's so much plot! I had an idea of how to have you and an idol meet and it turned out so much longer to explain than intended but I hope you enjoy anyways!

Today was Thursday, the day you and your best friend were leaving for California. The both of you being huge Stays and you both were not only able to get floor seats to their concert but you were also able to get tickets for the fan meet. The concert was on Saturday and the fan meet was on Sunday. You both wanted to stay in California for a bit to explore the sights so you'll get there today and won't come home to your shitty little home town until Monday.

"Omg y/n! I can't believe this is actually happening!" your friend exclaimed while skipping around your shared apartment packing. unable to contain their excitement. "did you really just say o-m-g??" you teased, laughing at your best friends antics.

"Shut up y/nnie! I'm gonna die of excitement so my brain isn't working!" they pouted and you couldn't help but to laugh. "When has your brain ever worked though?" you asked while folding a shirt to put in your suit case.

Suddenly your best friend jumped on your back while you leaned over to put the shirt in the luggage that was spread open on your couch. You stumbled a little out of surprise but we're able to stay balanced and standing, bursting into a fit of laughter as the koala clinging to your figure.

"Get off me so I can pack dummy." you said, moving your arms to hold their shins that wrapped around your front so they didn't fall and get hurt. "Nope! you hurt my feelings so this is your punishment!" they said, snorting while holding in their own laughter. "Alex, come on-" you said while wrapping your arms behind your back to reach their very ticklish sides and began to tickle them, causing them to squirm and lose their grip on you, falling to the floor on their back.

You took the opportunity to tackle them on the ground and keep tickling them, they were thrashing and kicking trying to get away but failing none the less. After a bit of torturing Alex, you both were laughing so hard that you had to catch your breath. Them still laying on their back, their knees bent and you sitting on your knees, leaned onto the heels of your feet. After a bit longer packing, you were somehow successful in packing everything in the car and were ready to drive the 12 hours to Los Angeles.

It was now 7pm and you just got up to your shared hotel room with your best friend. Luckily you each had separate beds and we're able to afford the room with a small kitchen, a lounge/living area, and two separate rooms conjoined by a bathroom. It was a really nice hotel room. Honestly quite a bit nicer than your apartment but oh well, this is LA, that's to be expected.

"Let's order dinner. What do you want?" you asked Alex, both of you still laying on your back, stretched out on your bed in the hotel. Neither of you moving to grab your phones to order. "Hmmmm fried chicken and beer?" Alex suggested. "Sounds good." you said, neither of you moving still.

after a few minutes of neither of you ordering Alex spoke up "Who's ordering?" "uhhhhhh" you responded, groaning and sitting up to grab your phone, opening Doordash to place the order. "okay. it'll be here in 30 minutes. I'm gonna go shower." you said, standing up and opening your luggage to grab a baggy black tee-shirt and a pair of boxers before heading to the bathroom and setting the water.

The shower helped relax your cramped muscles from driving for 12 hours. Alex was your permanent passenger prince/princess since they didn't have a license but normally you don't mind since you enjoy driving but 12 hours straight? that's a different story.

After your shower you walked out, wrapped in a towel, not bothering to cover your chest even though you haven't had too much surgery yet, it's still a man's chest and Alex has been your platonic soulmate since you were little. You've both seen each other naked and there's nothing to it. Shit, you both knew things about each other that should've just never been said but, that's how close you two were.

Alex was sitting on the couch in the lounge area, while you got dressed. They say on their phone with the chicken and beer on the small coffee table, waiting for you to start eating. You grabbed the remote from the entertainment center and sat next to Alex, your presence making them put up their phone and open a can of beer for the both of you while you searched Netflix for something to watch.

Both of you decided to start a new Anime. One called Blue Period that looked good and you both had seen people talking about on tiktok a couple times. "Ooh! let's take a photo for Instagram!" Alex said holding up their phone side ways, both of you posing, making sure your chicken, beer, and the hotel could be seen from the shot. "let's take one for my instagram." you said, both of you repeating the same process but you took the picture this time. You both posted and focused on the TV.

It was now Friday afternoon. You and Alex were walking around the outdoor mall to find your concert and fan meet outfits. You decided to find a Felix inspired outfit since he is your bias and Alex was gonna do a Han inspired outfit, him being their bias.

You two were laughing and eating two giant pretzels you'd gotten from Auntie Anne's when you bumped into someone, closing your eyes to brace for the pain about to hit your butt, but you never hit the floor. Opening your eyes you see a man with a black baseball cap, a black face mask, and the prettiest brown eyes you've ever seen.

"I'm so sorry. are you okay?" he asked in a thick Australian accent that made butterflies explode in your stomach. "I'm doing so much better now that I'm in the arms of such a beautiful man." You flirted to hide your embarrassment, you're a natural flirt and he was pretty. What were you supposed to do? NOT flirt with him?

The man helped you back to your feet, the tips of his ears turning slightly pink. "Well um, thank you. I'm glad your okay." he said and looked at his feet shyly.

so fucking adorable omg I could just eat him-

That's when he noticed your pretzel was on the ground. "Oh shoot- your pretzel. Here, let me buy you a new one." he said grabbing your wrist and dragging you just a few feet away but to the Auntie Anne's stand. "You don't have to Hun. It was only like $10." you said trying to reassure him that he didn't need to spend his money on you.

"it's the least I can do after running into you and making you drop your pretzel. You didn't even get a chance to take a bite of it yet." the masked man said, not taking no for an answer. You let out a giggle at how adorable he was being "You know you're really cute. You should give me your number." you said while he paid the worker and handed you the brand new pretzel.

He laughed at your statement. "I wish I could but really, I can't do that." he said regretfully. This man was having a really fun time with you but there's no way he could give out his number. "Awe~ do you have a girlfriend or boyfriend already? or maybe you're not into guys?" you asked in a teasing tone and a pout on your lips.

"No no no- it's nothing like that. it's just-" the man was cut off by your response. "Oh~ so you are into guys?" you couldn't help the urge to tease him. He was too adorable when he got flustered even though you could only see half his face, his ears turned a bright pink again at your teasing.

"I didn't say that!" he said, flustered. "So you're straight?" you asked with another pout and puppy dog eyes, causing the Australian to look away. "No- okay I'm Bi. happy?" he asked, still avoiding your eyes in embarrassment.

"I'd be happy if the pretty man that just told me he is in fact into guys, gave me his number." you said continuing your teasing. "Look- how about this. I'll make you a deal." the male started. You gave him puppy dog eyes, tilting your head to show you were listening.

"I'm only in LA for a couple days. If we somehow meet again while I'm here, then I'll give you my number. It's like a test of fate. If we are meant to talk more, then fate will bring us back together." he said and you couldn't help but smile. "Deal." you said holding out your hand for him to shake. His small hands clasp around your large ones in a firm hand shake. "Your hands are adorable by the way." you said and walked away, back to Alex who was waiting for you, scrolling through their phone, seeing you the two of you went back to shopping while you kept thinking about the male you'd just met.

You both finished shopping and went back to the hotel and did a mini fashion show for each other to decide what you'd wear tomorrow to the concert. The concert is tomorrow and you were about to jump out of your own skin with excitement. You two have been Stays since the pre-debut survival show and this is the first concert you'd been able to actually go to.

After deciding on your outfits, you both got dressed and decided to go out for dinner. It was a nice restaurant and the two of you were seated on the balcony, surrounded by fairy lights. You both decided to capture the moment taking a few photos together again, sipping on the wine you'd ordered and talking about what the setlist might be.

The nightlife in LA was gorgeous. So many pretty sights, people all around, etc. You two were walking on the Santa Monica peer after eating your dinner, slightly tipsy, just enjoying the cool breeze on your faces, blowing through your hair. You couldn't wait for tomorrow.

Today's the day of the concert and to say you were about to pee your pants was an understatement. You were excited, anxious, scared, nervous, giddy, etc. You were wearing your Felix inspired outfit based off what he wore in the Party's not over MV. Alex was wearing Han's outfit from the same music video. You were matching while representing your biases, the sunshine twins.

You guys were standing in line outside the venue, tickets pulled up from your emails. This was gonna be the longest 30 minutes ever. Just 30 minutes till you get to see your boys in person, live, sweating, performing, singing, rapping, everything you waited years to see what's finally happening in just 25 minutes.

You and Alex found your seats, barricade seats almost completely in the middle. You were so close you could reach out and touch the stage. Suddenly the lights dimmed and the concert was starting.

Your eyes were locked on Felix almost all night. You two making eye contact a few times. Him throwing flying kisses at you as well. It all still felt like a dream. It came to the fan service part and Felix sat at the edge of the stage in front of you and Alex. For some reason Felix felt drawn to you. There was some sort of connection there that he couldn't explain.

When he sat down and complimented you and Alex's outfits, recognizing them, your eyes met and it hit him why there was a connection. The mall. You were the flirty guy who he told to let fate decide if you should get his number. He recognized you but you seemed to star struck to piece it together.

Han joined Felix when he saw him and complimented Alex on their outfit noticing it was his outfit from the MV to Party's not over. They called the other members over to see and they all got really excited and told you two that next time you should dress as the other members. They jokingly argued about who before separating and going to the other fans.

Felix couldn't stop staring at you for the rest of the concert. Wondering if you figured it out. Finally at the end of the concert and the boys were leaving the stage it clicked. "Holy shit!" you screamed at Alex, both of you still unable to hear well from the loud music.

You both picked up McDonald's on the way back to the hotel. When you both got undressed, took showers, and sat down to watch anime and eat the McDonald's, you decided to explain the situation to Alex.

"no shit! no fucking way! how can you tell? the guy at the mall's face was almost completely covered." Alex said in shock. "I know that but the eyes are the same, the deep Australian voice, the way he walks, the size of his hands, the ring on his index finger, all of it is identical! I swear it was him and I think he recognized me too! did you see how he kept staring at me like I was the idol?" you were slightly raising your voice out of shock from the realization.

Fate brought you two back together and tomorrow is the fan sign where it'll be your third meeting. He can't fight fate on this. But how TF is he going to react? He promised to give you his number but he's an idol. there's no way he'll actually be able to give it to you. You now understand why he couldn't give it to you at the mall.

Today's the fan meet. You decided to wear Felix's outfit from the maxident trailer today for the fan meet. You were honestly so antsy after your discovery that you couldn't stay still. Your mind was going a million miles a minute. You gotta keep your composure. Be your flirty self. Don't show him that you were about to cry bc you had flirted with Felix, an internationally famous idol, no.

You and Alex were moving further up the line until Alex was next. From left to right it was oldest to youngest. Chan being the first one you'd meet and Jeongin being the last. You were shaking just a little bit. Antsy and excited as you watched everyone make their way down the line, holding hands and interacting with the boys.

"Next!" You heard the manager yell and jumped slightly. It was your turn now. You walked up the steps of the platform to where Chan sat, sitting in front of him and intertwining your hands like you two had done this a million times before.

"And what's your name handsome?" Chan asked you and you remembered one of his messages on bubble. "Didn't you say my name was Mrs. Bang? I think Mr. Bang fits me better tho don't you think?" you said leaning forward with your normal flirty behavior, taking Chan off guard before he laughed. "I did say that didn't I?" he asked with a chuckle. "So it's Y/N Bang." you responded and he wrote a cute little message next to his signature for you.

You continued flirting with each member down the line and now you were sat in front of your mystery man. You two locking eyes and a smirk grew on your lips when his eyes went wide seeing you yet again. "Hmmmm it seems fate has caused us to meet three times now. I think you owe me something now." you said leaning forward, elbows on the table and your chin resting on your hands.

"Y/N... now you know why I can't give you my number. But..." He paused looking around to make sure no one was looking and flipped to the back of your album before writing something. "a deal is a deal and I'm a man of my word." he said, unable to resist the pull you had on him.

He handed the album next to him to Seungmin since you'd be meeting him next. "I don't know why I'm doing this but there's just something about you that-" he was cut off when you leaned even closer to him. "what? makes you wanna ruin me? makes you wanna hear what I sound like when you have me in bed?" you whispered teasing him and moving your feet up his shin teasing him. "Fuck..." he mumbled in response as the images flooded his head.

Your time was up and as you stood, you walked shaking your hips a bit at Felix knowing he was watching you and his eyes finding their way to your ass. He bit his lips as he felt a bit restricted in his pants. Thank God for the table and table cloth that hit the floor.

After going all the way through, you told Alex that you needed to run to the restroom really quick. There were only a few people after you so, Felix should be able to check his phone soon. Your timing had to be perfect. You went into the men's restroom and checked that all the stalls were empty. You pulled out your phone taking a mirror pic of yourself. Your shirt pulled up, the hem of it between your teeth showing your abs a bit, hooking your thumb into the waistband of your pants to pull them down, exposing your V-line and just a little bit of stubble underneath.

After taking the lewd pic, you typed in the number written in the back of your album and sent it to Felix. You put yourself back together, washing your hands and your phone chimed. A message from Felix already.

"You- I know where that bathroom is. don't go anywhere." was all the message said. You love the chase but you were too intrigued to not listen. Soon after Felix walked into the bathroom to see you sitting on the sink counter waiting for him.

"God- I don't understand what the fuck your doing to me BUT- I can't help myself. Can I touch you?" he asked and fuck, being asked for consent has never been more sexy than when Felix did it.

"I'd be pretty upset if you didn't to be honest." you said as you stepped between your legs, placing his hands on your jaw and pulling you in for a kiss. It was soft and sweet with a bit of heat in it. like Felix was fighting everything inside him to take you on that counter. It was so hot feeling him fighting his own self control all because of you.

You and Felix couldn't keep your hands or mouths off each other as you walked into his hotel room, both of your clothes flying everywhere. Soft moans and pants leaving your mouth as his lips were attached to your neck, walking you backwards and onto his bed. You finished taking off your pants and boxers to expose your soaked cunt. He removed his pants to free his rock hard cock.

The tip was red and angry, leaking pre-cum as he paused at the sight in front of him. You were on your back, legs spread, propped up on your elbows, staring up at him through your eyelashes. Lust and Need displayed onto your face. "Like what you see?" you asked him as he licked his lips at the sight. Your dick glistening while your hole was clenching around nothing.

"Fuck- you're so fucking pretty." he growled, climbing back on top of you, his cock rubbing against yours, a groan erupting from your throat as you threw you head back. He took the opportunity to continue sucking on your neck. Your hands tangled into his hair as you began rolling your hips to rub your dicks together.

A low growl escaped from his chest at the friction. "you're so fucking wet. god-" he groaned as he moved his hand between your bodies, using your arousal to lube his index and middle finger, rubbing them between your folds. "Can I fuck you with my fingers pretty boy?" he asked and there it was again. Consent was sexy.

"Please lix" you purred at the man as he pushed his fingers inside of you, curling them to hit your sweet spot. A loud, almost pornographic, moan falling from your lips, the hand in his hair tightening a bit at the feeling. "You're so fucking tight. you feel so fucking good on my fingers." he praised against your chest, leaving kisses and hickeys along the soft skin.

He fucked you on his fingers for a bit before he pulled them out of you, locking eyes with yours while you were panting from how he was working his magic. He stuck out his tongue, pushing the coated fingers into his mouth and moaning around them. "You taste sweeter than I thought." he said before kissing you again, the same softness and need in it as before. You could taste yourself on his tongue, making you moan into his mouth.

"L-lix please... I need you." you panted against his mouth when you two separated for air. This time he didn't need to ask for consent. He reached into the pocket of his jeans that were in a pile on the floor, pulling out a condom (always stay prepared). You took it from his hands and scooted up on the bed so your head was rested on the pillows, maintaining eye contact while opening the package with your teeth.

He took the chance to follow you up the bed, kneeling between your spread legs, cock twitching and leaking in need. After taking the condom out of the package you rolled it down his length teasing him a bit and stroking your hand up and down a few times before lining him up with your entrance and letting him push into you.

He pushed in slowly with a groan, feeling you wrap around him. "Fuck you feel so fucking good. so tight." he said and stopping once he bottomed out inside you to let you adjust. He noticed your tight grip on the sheets as he took your hand into his and kissed your knuckles, soothing you the best he could.

After a few moments of Felix staying still and peppering your hands, arms, neck, and face with kisses, you finally adjusted to his size. "You- you can move now." you said letting out airy breaths, making eye contact with the blonde above you with a small smile of reassurance that you were okay.

He attached your lips together in a slow, passionate, kiss before slowly pulling out and pushing in again. He kept the pace slow and soft, feeling every inch of you wrapping around his length. He was letting out deep and airy moans against your lips while intertwining his fingers into yours and handing your hands, pinning them to the bed next to you head in a romantic way.

You two were in such sync that it was a little scary. Every touch on your body felt like sparks to fuel the fire forming in the pit of your stomach as he took his time with you. It was unlike any other time you've had sex. You were used to rough and fast paced sex. Bordering on hate-fucking but this was miles apart from that.

Felix put so much passion and care into every movement and touch. It was soft, slow, and sensual and in no way boring as most people would think vanilla sex would be like. Every single nerve ending was heightened and it made you feel high. The way he praised you, kissed you, made you feel good, and the way he took care of your body and mind every single step of the way.

You were feeling a familiar knot forming in your stomach as Felix's pace and thrusts became a bit sloppier than before and you could feel him twitching inside of you. You were both getting close. "F-felix... I'm- I'm cl- close." you whimpered out, kissing him again, a bit sloppier and needier before but none of the passion and care from before was missing.

"Me too baby- fuck. Please, cum for me." He moaned, almost begging. Hearing his deep voice, raspy and begging you to cum on his cock was all it took to have your body tumbling over the edge of the cliff into one of the strongest orgasms you've ever experienced. You were moaning loudly, tears began to fall from your eyes as the pure ecstasy ripped through your body.

Felix chased his own high as you tightened around him when you came, pushing him over the edge. His deep moans creating a perfect harmony with your own moans. His left chaste kisses down your body as he pulled out, falling to the side as you both panted heavily. Stars were still filling your vision.

Felix was playing with your hands, his head on your chest and one leg rested over your thighs. Both of you hit with exhaustion and just enjoying each other's company. "Here in a bit, let me run you a bath and get you cleaned up yeah?" he said while using his hand to push the hair clinging to your forehead out of your face, smiling at you when your eyes met again. You nodded softly with a smile of your own "that sounds great." you replied and kissed his forehead softly.

~Back at the Hotel~

"God! I can't believe they just fucking left me there!" Alex was pacing in the hotel room after having taken an Uber back since again, they can't drive. Leaving your car at the venue.

They'd already texted you a million and one times, leaving thousands of missed calls. They called you again, leaving yet another voicemail. "[Your first, middle, and last name] I swear to fuck that dick you're getting better be worth leaving me at the venue! You better get home in the next 30 minutes or I'm using your credit card to treat myself as an apology!"

[tassodelmiele]

Noisy little mess

Hi sweetie ⁓

Next parte will be the last one, and let me say I'm pretty proud of this little english writing attempt (that should have been, like, a five pages funny things, and i dunno why now i've got 48 pages saved).

I'll leave you with my stupid disclaimers, and let's have a nice week ⁓

DISCLAIMERS: little bit of blood (not that much, though); totally inaccurate military action; Price is questioning his role in the Task Force, again; Ghost finally managed to get injured; a slightly amount of praising (my god I LOVE PRAISING AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME); planning future chocolate oatmeal's breakfast;

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Seventh part here:

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«Maybe you're doing it 'cause you need some…particular attention»

«No. No, i don't»

«You're gonna get her an aneurysm. Me too, I'm getting one right now». The clicking, metallic sound of a recharge fills the void of words. Price spits out the fag end; he does not remember having signed something about "being the task force's psychologist".

He decides to be brutally honest: «It's so obvious, Ghost. Stop denying it. Make peace with your brain»

«'S not obvious, nothing's obvious in this bloody life»

«I've told you: either you end up with her, or you open up. Your choice»

The answer's a mumbled breath under the mask, an attempt to empty his lungs from responsibilities and fill them with gunpowder and old blood scent. Maybe the blood is even his, it doesn't matter.

Current mission is a piece of cake: a couple hostyles to get rid of, one place to secure, assure Laswell there's no trace of weapons that shouldn't be in a supposed abandoned shack in the middle of nowhere. 

Price is so relaxed he's smoked just one cigar in the entire day. On the other hand, Ghost's a nerves knot, a walking killer machine who's, almost certainly, unloading some tough stuff throughout the mission.

Tough for his mind, at least.

«She's killing me»

Price chuckles. Dear god, how damn hard his Lt. was to break…

«She's awakening you. 'S different»

«Is the same as being killed. I'd rather be asleep»

«Seems like your brain cells are sleeping too much, though. Time to make a damn decision»

«I did!» Ghost tilts his head at Price, his eyes so widened he's about to throw his last crumble of patience out of his orbit. «I choose to have nothing to deal with her, but she's goddamn everywhere! Why in the bloody hell did they send a second team with us for this stupid mission, and why, my god, WHY is she in that fucking team??»

«That's your fault» Price sighs softly. «You've chosen her for the special recruitment»

«'Cause I needed the opportunity to speak with her!»

A: «Liar» is murmured under John's beard, making Ghost mutter like a scolded child. 

«Is it so hard to admit you just like her company?»

«I swear to god Cap., I'm gonna rip every hair of your beard with rusty tweezers»

«I'm even being good with ya, giving you a choice. Do you prefer being kicked to a good psychologist to make him read your bloody dreams?»

«I-»

A rumble cuts Ghost's voice, making the earth tremble under them. A grave explosion drills their ears, putting them at attention immediately, weapons charged and eyes on the thick, dense smoke cloud that's rising outside the shack.

A bomb. A small one maybe, hidden somewhere next to their target. They rush outside, radio connecting as soon as fuck with the other team.

«Echo one, this is Bravo six, send position, over»

Answer is a disturbed, glitching sound, piercing hoarsely through the radio: «Bravo six, this is ---- ------ thirty meters ---------- the shack, there was a bomb hidden, we ---- immediate help, over»  

«Echo one, this is Bravo six, say again»

«Bra-»

Then a sudden hand grabs Price by the gear, slamming him on the shack's wall before a flying shot could pierce his hat. Cap. takes a slow, steady breath as Ghost adjusts his aim and, one second later, hits the target precisely as a sewing machine on a leather jacket. 

«Good job»

«Place wasn't cleared» Ghost sticks his head out from behind the wall before allowing the two of them to proceed toward the explosion. «Where the hell are they-»

«Someone's sending reinforcements»

«Where's team b?»

Simon is just finishing the question when he feels some kinda force grabbing him from behind, and pulling him back so strongly he's forced to stumble backwards a few steps before recollecting enough lucidity to turn, gun pointed behind him aiming…

You. 

You, totally scattered, covered in dirt and smoke, breathing like crazy as you're grasping onto the two men's uniform, managing to block fourth time your weight with your bare strength.

«North!» You yell so suddenly Price almost jumps at the sight of your bloody injected eyes. «Thirty…goddamn…meters north from…the fucking radio's not…» You mumble, one step away from letting you go on the ground and allowing your muffled ears to close completely.

Ghost's grasp on your shoulder squeezes you strongly enough to make you wimp.

«What happened?»

«The rocks scattered outside the shack» you spit, coughing words as sensible as possible. «Are not rocks. Enemy disguised a bunch of bombs. Team b is safe, there's another shack near-»

Then a burned growl, a sudden lamp, needles through your kettledrums. 

And your sight goes dark.

Waking up is like being kicked in the head with a rock.

As far as you can feel, your limbs may have been missing somewhere, since you're not sensing any of them. You're breathing dirt, your throat is so dry you could start a fire in your lungs, and what gives you the good news your ears are functioning is a muffled, mumbled breath a few meters away. You scroll powder and dust from your face, trying to clean your eyes a little without injecting ash under the eyelids, then you take a look around.

First impression: everything felt down on itself. What should have been the shack is now a bunch of crumbled walls put together by the explosion's mastery, sprinkled with ashes and smoke-flavored.

Second impression: illumination's enough for you to spot a darker something backed against a cracked wall. Ops; a darker someone.

«…Lieutenant?»

You surprise yourself with how harsh your voice is. You clear a bit of its roughness before tossing again: «Lt, are you-»

«Alive. Affirmative» he spits, in a voice shittier than yours. He's not moving, he's back's against the wall and one hand is pressed on the left side of his body. You shiver, for whatever reason, just by looking at him, daring to ask:

«…are you ok?»

«Just a bit broken» he murmurs. It is not enough for you.

«What-»

«Another explosion. Bloody shack fell on us. Price managed to get out, calling for help» 

«You're injured»

It's not a question. It's obvious: the more you get near to him, the more he curls his hand against his hip; the more you limp toward him (your stupid leg is hurting) the more he tries to clear his throat, sounding as confident as possible as he declares:

«I'm good»

«Oh, yes. Yes, I can see how "good" you are»

«It's-» he suddenly hissed, his fingers clenched and trembling. «There's nothing to…worry 'bout»

«Let me see»

«You can't do-»

«Let me decide what I can do»

«No»

You could definitely ignore him, and maybe you could even take a look at whatever bloody wound he's hiding from your sight, since he's evidently not strong enough to hold your stubbornness. 

You do not move, though. You stop in front of him, clenching your fists, waiting for…something. And he notices.

«Ya'r not complaining» he murmurs, letting his head cling to the wall behind to look at you better.

«It's a battlefield. There's no need to play»

«So yelling at someone's your favorite game»

«Why should it be?» «'Cause you do it everyday»

If you were in a different situation, maybe you would have ended up seriously yelling again. But his voice is not harsh; it's not rough, not scolding or mad, he's neither joking nor making fun of you. There's something…soft, just like when he protected you from that stupid rookie who tried to threaten you with that collar joke.

Maybe he's just too weak, maybe he's lost some of his good old cold brain cells all together with the blood, 'cause you can't believe what you hear as he muffles with the lowest, warmest voice you've ever heard from him:

«It would be a shame not to hear your cute whine again»

Damn.

You could melt, right here, in this spot in the middle of this fucking fallen walls, and your eyes would keep on looking at him as if they're glued to his shadow.

You swallow dirt and dryness.

«Could you please don't…don't. Just don't. I-I'm sure Cap. will come back as soon as-»

«Shut» he breathes, half tired and half amused «Your little mouth, gnome. Just enjoy the silence. 'K?»

You open your mouth, ready to say something which could be mean, but also nice, but also worried, but also…nothing. It could be nothing, and this time your brain closes your phonatory apparatus in time, and you just decide to follow his tip.

And you go sit next to Ghost, curling against the wall.

He chuckles under the mask, collecting enough breath to whisper: «Good girl», directly in your ear.

And your shiver.

Not 'cause of the coldness.

He notices. You know he does as he tilts his head a little toward you, whispering:

«Did he used to call you like that?»

You frown, and he specifies, with voice a little scattered: «Your dominant counterpart»

Your body tenses up, curled with knees pressed on your chest. Your eyes are burning and digging under the broken floor as you nod, blushing like an idiot.

He chuckles, audibly, laughing softly under the mask.

«I'm sorry» he suddenly murmurs, taking you completely by surprise. Your eyes jerk toward him in the heast to see if he's really here, next to you, saying those things. You spot his dark figure thrown against the wall, abandoned in a pose that's more and more stiff, tense, while the hand pressed against the wound is loosening strength.

You push your own palm on his, without thinking, curling on his side to reach the blood-wet spot.

He's cold. Too cold. And your hand instantly becomes slimy, warm and wet as the metallic scent reaches your nose.

«You won't be sorry anymore when the mission is over. When you awaken fully recovered» you try a teasing tone, kicking away fears and worry. «You'll regain your sharpness, I'm sure as hell. Sharp as the splinter in your hip»

«Don't know if I can…sharpen myself again»

«No way» you smile. «Lieutenant Riley, the most feared soldier of us all, doesn't know something? Impossible. Outrageous»

«I do know» He whispers back «How much of a dick I can be, sometimes»

And you sigh, not daring to agree.

There is a moment of silence. Then he adds, almost tearing words out of his own mouth:

«It wasn't to…fool you. I…don't know how to need someone anymore»

«And you end up needing me? The worst choice, seriously»

«You're rude to yourself»

«I've told you: I can see clear. Dunno why you spotted me»

«Maybe I thought you were…easy to handle» he breathes out, eyes almost closed as you grip stronger on his hand, pressing it against the dense blood stain. 

«I'm not. You should have learned»

«It was a fight I was willing to win. I am willing to win»

«Against whom? Me?»

«Maybe myself»

«And you're gonna win against yourself by touching my panties and scolding my behavior?»

Silence, again. 

He breathes slowly, tilting his eyes at you again.

«You're so easy to read. A bloody open book to me»

«Fun. You're kinda the opposite: a goddamn locked spell-book written in hieroglyphics»

«'S that so?»

«Can assure you»

«Then why have you bear me?»

«'Cause you're my superior, ya know-»

«Look at me»

And you do. You swallow your savoir-faire, your jokes and the blood scent in your nose, erasing the wet, dense mud in your hand, and focusing all your energies on raising your sight at him, who's panting scattered cold air but can pierce you through his sight anyway, making you tremble in a sudden insecurity, letting you feel so small even with a hand pressed on his life.

And he repeats, stern but soft, gently yet firmly: «Why have you bear me?»

And you, little bird kicked out of the nest too early to know how to lie, who's been raised with good words and promises of hugs and chocolate if you deserve them, you find yourself answering soft as a love song:

«…'Cause I liked how dealing with you makes me feel»

He lets out a soft breath.

«Good girl»

And your whole body trembles, curling up more against his side, clinging to his body with your hand still pressed on his to secure the wound, and your head pushed on his chest.  

But he doesn't dare to touch you more than that; he just lets you adjust over him, peeking at you from above.

The broken room closes on you, knot together in a dark spot on the wall, a breathing clot of blood-scent and ashes. You press your cheek on his arm, smelling gunpowder and grass on his gear. 

«Can we…eat chocolate oatmeal together again?»  

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[candyskiez]

i would love to hear more of ur thoughts about ???%… specifically surrounding teru cause it’s been on my mind lately

OHOHOHOHO you've awoken the beast. I am so sorry. I will specify. I love Teru. I love Teru so much. This makes it sound like I don't like Teru. I really like Teru. I am writing about ???%'s thoughts. I am studying him under a microscope. None of this is how I personally feel about Teru. Do not kill me. Please do not kill me.

I'm admittedly biased towards plural mob because. System. But I did write this with both plural mob and ???% as the repressed parts of Mob, so feel free to read it as metaphorical or Guy In Mobs Brain.

So. I've been thinking a lot lately about how Teru strangling Mob could've easily been the first time he almost died. Like. I don't think he almost died in that incident when they were kids, and I think Reigen would not be nearly as relaxed on jobs if he thought Mob would die. We've seen how he is when Mob's in any amount of what he considers to be serious danger. So I feel like it's very, very important to remember that when talking about how ???% reacts to Teru. ???% does not react to the literal terrorists as much as he reacts to Teru, because Teru was the first and one of the most personal.

I say most personal because well. For the others it wasn't about him, it was about a goal. Teru was just...fighting him, in Mobs eyes. Teru was operating on his own insecurities. It wasn't some big conflict, it wasn't some epic anime fight, it was just about Teru's insecurities and need for Mob to not be a threat to him and to be Better than everyone else. It was just two kids fighting. I think a lot about why ???% holds onto this so so hard, and a few reasons I think he has are

1. The shit listed above

2. The fact that Mob wasn't doing anything to instigate, was in fact actively asking him to stop, doing ALL the "do not stick out, do no harm" shit that made Mob repress ???% so hard in the first place, and Teru still hurt him. Mob repressed him for no fucking reason because people would still hurt him anyway.

3. This very well could've been one of the few times ???% has came out at all in a long time. I'm not sure how often ???% would've gotten to come out since it seems for a while he just came out when Mob needed it/when Mob wasn't around to stop it. So like. First memory in years and it's this guy strangling you. Would leave a pretty big impression.

4. Teru never actually apologized. Like. WE know he's sorry. But Mob and ???%...didn't? Mob was willing to let it slide. But like...those repressed emotions are gonna go somewhere. Mob might not want to think about it, but that event was traumatic for everyone involved. They almost died and Teru had his entire world view torn apart, got thrown into the SKY, and had to piece everything together lol over again. Like. ???% depending on your view point is Mobs repressed emotions or someone that literally formed to hold his repressed memories (save me plural mob, save me). ???% admits in the manga he doesn't trust anyone. How many times did he feel unsafe around him and wasn't able to do anything, because Mob liked him? Because mob cared about him and knew he changed, so it'd be unfair to bring it up, and besides HES the one who really hurt Teru, so it's fine! It's fine. <- Boy who isn't fine. How much was ???% just waiting for Teru to turn around and attack them again?

5. This also leads into my next thought: lack of agency. Some of these points will be less applicable if you don't view him as plural, but I think some of them still definitely work if you think of him as Mob but to the left: he feels like he didn't get a say in whether not they'd be close with Teru, he feels like Teru just Decided they were friends and didn't even acknowledge what happened and now he can't mention it or ask if he's actually changed or if he's even sorry because then he'll be an asshole so he just HAS to be quiet regardless of how he feels about it. He feels like everyone just decided Teru was SO good now and didn't even ask him how HE felt about it. He feels like Teru's moved on and just FINE, like he didn't almost fucking die. Actually I think almost all of this works if you don't view him as plural. Yippee I'm not accidentally alienating anyone here.

6. No seriously. Teru didn't apologize. Did ???% almost come out a few times at being around Teru. Did Mob get scared by Teru reaching towards him and ???% started to surface. How many times.

Okay okay. Now onto confession arc. I'm thinking about why he acted the way he did and like. He wanted to hurt him so bad. And it's so damn raw. Like. Teru is repeating the lesson Mob taught him, genuinely trying to help, but from ???%'s perspective it feels like a fucking joke. Teru almost killed him. Teru acted not even that different for YEARS, and he gets a slap on the wrist. But ???% messes up once and he's punished, for years? But Teru doesn't even have to apologize? Teru doesn't even have to try to get forgiven? But ???% was dutifully silent for four years. And he's still hated. I feel like that was kind of the point where ???% became WAY more destructive which. Very interesting. He went from "I need to see Tsumobi" to "I want to hurt this person." Also I'm thinking about how strongly he reacted to being told it was for his own good, that Tsumobi shouldn't see him like this, to calm down like. Okay. There's no way he hasn't heard all of that a million times. Like obviously I love it from a plural perspective but I'm gonna go into ???% is an allegory for a sec. Being told that you need to mask for your own good, that they just totally have your best interests at heart and that's why they never want to hear you complain or look upset or even slightly lose control of yourself or act even slightly abnormal. Let alone the fact ???% believes HES the real Shigeo. In his eyes being told to calm down and act like Mob again is being told to stop existing. He's being told to calm down the first time in YEARS he's let any of this out. And like. Tsumobi shouldn't see you like this. In his mind that's being told "Tsumobi shouldn't see YOU. People shouldn't see you. You're not desirable. People don't want to look at you. Just go away. Just be normal. Just be quiet. Calm down. Stop making such a scene. Get a clue." And that's obviously not how Teru meant it and ???% is doing serious damage, but like. He's having a breakdown. He seems calm in the mind scape, but he is Not Fucking Calm. He's having a breakdown. He feels so goddamn rejected by everyone and he's chasing the one good memory he got to make as ???%, not Mob. Which like. God from an autism or a plural perspective hits me so fucking hard. I remember being a kid and clinging on way too hard to my only friend because she didn't mind me acting autistic and getting so so terrified when she started drifting away from me. Watching it just feels like watching kid me panic because the only person who doesn't hate him isn't hanging out with him anymore. Being plural and autistic means this show will kill you. Anyways. What I'm saying is Teru basically took a mallet to every single one of ???%'s buttons and he took that Personally.

I'm gonna can it here because if I don't I'll never shut up. But I love Teru and ???%'s dynamic. So much. I love it. I have so many more thoughts on it, plural and non plural. You have no idea how much it's paining me to can it here. This fucking show, man.

[bloodscribed]

INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY.

a set of prompts featuring lyrics from the album of the same name by waterparks. may contain suggestive content. feel free to change things as needed for the sake of writing!

ST*RFUCKER

"I'm gonna move out of my loft and into a limousine."

"Jesus Christ won't text me back."

"I'll always be around, in fact."

"I'm climbing up your window now."

"It's been a pleasure, it's nice to meet you."

"Maybe I'm a soul-sucker."

"But you're just a star fucker."

"I bet you wouldn't ask me to do that by this time next year."

"You can't hide my face and save me for a rainy day."

"It don't go two ways."

"I don't wanna be toxic, I just wanna be honest."

"But this shit hurts like a comet."

"And it just hurts 'cause I want it."

REAL SUPER DARK

"I'm outta my cage, and I'm on the stage."

"I'm dying to give you a show."

"I'm alienated, way overrated."

"Here are a few of the notes."

"My fans are the best."

"They'd love me more dead."

"But baby, it's gettin' too loud."

"Yo, shut the fuck out of your mouth."

"Bite tongue 'till there's blood in my mouth."

"It freaks me out."

"It gets real super dark around the edge of my heart."

FUNERAL GREY

"Now I'm tripping off the deep end."

"So call me a Lyft or a black hearse."

"I know you'll make my head spin."

"What's your favorite color?"

"That's not a color, it's a shade."

"Don't disagree with me."

"And then she walked away."

"I didn't get her name."

"I can't explain the look on her face."

"She wore a sweater in summer weather."

"It was funeral grey."

"And now it's killing me."

"I just want you to be my next mistake that I'm gonna make."

"She walked in, took a hit."

"That shit is gonna kill you."

"Well now you're gonna die too."

"I said that you can call me, beep me if you want my skin."

"She rolled her eyes."

"I know your dying wish is to be baptized in my spit."

"Float my way, I'm melting for you."

BRAINWASHED

"What's up?"

"Hello, I'm tryna meet ya."

"Shocked at the words coming from my tongue."

"A language that I'm not familiar."

"Don't take it away."

'I wanna play."

"Where did the time fly?"

"What if I pray?"

"Hoping you'll stay into the daylight."

"Wait, what am I saying?"

"I feel insane."

"It's only been a couple days."

"I'm having the same thoughts, can't stop."

"Thinking you got me brainwashed."

"I'm see-through, need you."

"Why do I think you're so cool?"

"Everything's clean except for my thoughts."

"Thinking about me getting you off."

"It's been a week, I'm still at your house."

"I don't wanna leave, it's freaking me out."

"Why am I acting like that?"

"Are you really that funny, or am I hallucinating?"

"It's like my brain isn't mine."

"This syndrome feels Stockholm."

"Do you wanna keep me on lock, though?"

"Symmetrical feelings match best when we're staring at the ceiling."

2 BEST FRIENDS

"I'm trying to turn my mind off."

"But I don't know where to go when the night's long."

"I could have picked your body in a lineup."

"Now I'm sick of waiting on you to call."

"Yeah, I'm sick of playing it cool."

"So I went out with my two best friends."

"Tried anything not to think of you."

"It didn't work, and I feel like shit."

"Wake up tomorrow and try again."

"You hit back with the syntax."

"You treated my heart like a handbag."

"So now I'm solo when the night's cold."

"Yeah, I kissed a couple people, but they taste wrong."

END OF THE WATER (FEEL)

"If you feel it, then I feel it too."

"If you believe me, I could be your truth."

"If you need me, all I need is you."

"Why we ghost each other for a week at a time?"

"Make plans and let 'em fall through."

"I can't even call you, let alone call you mine."

"I can be nonchalant, if that's what you really want."

"But I'm just glad you and I are alive at the same time."

"We can't take back what we never gave."

"And that distance keeps us safe."

"But nobody told me that safe is so lonely."

"Can't we act like you and I are alive at the same time?"

"Do you feel it? 'Cause I feel it too."

"Do you need it? 'Cause I need it too."

SELF-SABOTAGE

"When we talk, I'm never wrong."

"Might unplug my phone at night."

"When you need me most, I'll miss that flight."

"Now we're at the part where you'll hate what you see."

"What the fuck is wrong with me?"

"I'm on my way to you, but I'll self-sabotage."

"So I might drive my car and crash into your garage."

"To get away from you, I'll self-sabotage."

"If you like when we talk, I'll dislocate my jaw."

"I'll piss you off and ask what's wrong."

"I want this to work so bad."

"But I want but I can't have."

"Make plans and break them to see what you say."

"'Cause you put on makeup and I'm still in bed."

RITUAL

"Gotta clear my front lawn off."

"Melatonin, eyes feel heavy tonight."

"I could sleep for weeks."

"Don't look for me."

"They're killing me when I'm fast asleep."

"Are you hearing me?"

"I'm living fucking betrayed."

"Living like I'm dead and on my own."

FUCK ABOUT IT

"I like you but I need some space."

"I like you kinda far away."

"It's not that hard to kill a day looking at your face."

"I like you but I need some room."

"It doesn't always stay that way."

"I hate the aftertaste."

"I don't wanna leave you hangin' on."

"But when we fight, it's like a marathon."

"Give me three days alone."

"We can fuck about it later, if you want."

"It's all we really do when something's wrong."

"You don't seem to like it when we talk."

"I guess I'll see you later."

"Because we never fix the problems that we've got."

"You've been at my crib for like the seventh day up in a row."

"You've been doing silly things like checking who I follow."

"I won't lie to you."

"It's like scars on my wrist."

CLOSER

"Nothing stays the same."

"I feel love a different way."

"I got my space, but what did I pay for you?"

"'Cause I love you, or I want to."

"But I don't know how."

"I need to really feel you."

"But we're running around."

"Is it easy now?"

"You only hit me in the evening."

"I need you closer."

"I need it over."

"There's nothing left to let go."

"It's the darkest afterglow."

"Maybe in another life, we can try and get us right."

"You're the holiday I celebrate too late."

"You're the eyes I gave up trying to captivate."

"You're the song I loved but then overplayed."

"I'm the b-side throwaway."

"I hope you never rain on my charade."

"I've been fucked so much that I no longer wait."

"I sabotage and break my own heart just in case."

"Will it kill me in the evening that I let you down?"

NIGHT OUT ON EARTH

"Am I missing out?"

"Am I having fun?"

"Is it just me, or is it everyone?"

"The love I get is virtual."

"Now Jesus hates my guts."

"It's getting personal."

"It's a night out on earth."

"The last one for a while, can't get worse."

"Now if I ever feel jealous, I just turn it into lyrics."

"I turn pain into rain and sing along."

"I wear all my red flags like a cape."

"Life gave me lemons, now I bleed lemonade."

"It gets so fucking hot under all this shade."

"Everywhere I walk's a toxic parade."

"The glove don't fit, but I wear it anyway."

"It's a hell of a time."

"Was I loved, or was I right?"

"Am I gonna go to hell in my sleep?"

"Or will God forgive me?"

"I gotta hide everybody that I like."

"Because everyone I know knows another me."

"It's getting hard to keep track of everything I keep locked behind my back."

"I'm leaving when the night goes."

"I ain't gonna let go."

SNEAKING OUT OF HEAVEN

"When we fuck, it feels like I'm struck by your lightning."

"They say I'm brainwashed, yeah I might be."

"I built a secret room for you."

"Just one more chance to adore you."

"If you're toxic, I'll wear a hazmat."

"Do you think God knows?"

"You've been sneaking out of heaven."

"Were his eyes closed?"

"There's no way He's just letting you fall from the stars."

"I swear to God my heart's gonna pop."

"If I'm not brainwashed, man, I'm trying to be."

"Swallow my shoes and my car keys."

"I don't need those, 'cause I won't leave."

"I'll have to jump the gates when I die."

"Go to my place, and you put away your halo."

[justalia]

Hello Alia!

I must express my admiration for your work here on social media. I like the way you are direct with conscious creation. You simplify everything to make it easy to understand! I'm seeking guidance in my situation because I don’t know what to do, or if I should even take action. I like how you come across things, so In asking for advice in here. This might be a bit lengthy, I apologize in advance.

How can I reset my manifesting journey?

I've been into manifesting since middle school, and now I’m in college. Most of my life, I’ve desired a life I could achieve most of the time. In middle school/high school, I wanted to be popular and admired (I was an insecure weird kid) and tried absurd methods like “writing letters to the Universe to get your SP” and things like that. Obviously, I didn’t achieve anything. When it came to partners, I became fixated, creating scenarios in my head to materialize (to get) things in my life

Of course, I spent years, YEARS, trying to obtain things. Not one thing specifically , it was me chasing the perfect idea of how my life should look like. Throughout those years, I discovered many manifestation teachers; Neville, Edward, etc., but none led me to a stable point, because I had this pattern of overconsumption and obsession.

I think it's pretty embarrassing to admit that I spent a lot of time in my teenage years desiring a life that I couldn’t have. I was always lost in my own mind. I was nothing. I yearned to be loved. I was imagining and hoping but nothing changed

It was a cycle of terrible punishment to myself because I couldn’t materialize what I wanted. I fell into a state of limerence and, for my own mental well-being, I sort of gave up trying to get things.

My life became normal, but deep down, a part of me desired that successful, wealthy, and fulfilled life. I've tried to return to this journey, but it seems like I'm so burned out that it isn’t (somehow) available to me anymore. It's like a blockage. I think I resent myself for putting myself through this.

I know manifesting works; there have been times in my life where I’ve imagined things and they just appeared, but it was never the things I wanted.

I'm crying while typing this because, sincerely: this makes me feel so pathetic. Tons of material, tons of information, and applied incorrectly causing a mental burnout for me. I know that I should apply it, but my brain doesn't let me. (I hope I'm explaining myself well) I'm really afraid that if I try to manifest something, I'll fall into this state of limerence and madness. When I say I'm burned out, I'm burned out. Every time I think about this topic, my head hurts. I seem to know everything about this but nothing.

The main problem is that sort of, this way of hoping trying to get things it’s so engraved in my mind that I can’t seem to even start to “manifest” small things without feeling like I’m manifesting them. I know you become one in imagination, but how can I make my brain understand this? 😔

What should I do? How can I reset? If not, what is the best that I can do?

Have a good day. Keep doing what you do. And thank u anyway.

hi!

i couldn’t leave this ask unanswered so i’m gonna try my best.

first of all thank you so much for your kind words and i’m glad you could find my words helpful and knowledgeable.

i really understand where you are coming from and my greatest advice would be to drop all the knowledge you have on this and look into non dualism. i advice you do it only when you feel like you can go into it with a completely open mind and without any expectations so that you can find yourself. the real Self.

non dualism has been for me a way of understanding the way the “world” actually operates better and look at “manifestation” in a completely different way.

when it comes to how you’re feeling regarding your journey i’d like to give you this insight: that was never you. the character you’ve built has been through so many trials and tribulations and it feels “pathetic” for that. that was never you. believe me when i tell you this. all the labels you put on yourself are simply that: labels.

find your true self, stop manifesting anything and realize who you are. really realize it and feel the peace coming with this realization.

let me add this: the thing you think you have to free yourself from never really happened.

[infin1ty-garden]

୭🧷✧˚. DON'T SHUT ME DOWN

⋆｡°✩ summary: after erasing mae's memories of osha, she's broken out of prison by a friend ⋆｡°✩ pairing: mae aniseya x gn! reader ⋆｡°✩ warnings: *acolyte 8ep spoilers* ⋆｡°✩ word count: 445 ⋆｡°✩ author note: while i'm still hyperfixated on acolyte writing this

masterlist. & the acolyte masterlist

She had a sister. One she doesn't remember. What was she like? A jedi killed her mother. Now a jedi is asking for her help. Why? She doesn't know anything. What is she gonna do? But she can't say no to helping the jedi or she'll go to prison. She thinks so at least. The only person she remembers is a girl. A few moments of her are ingrained in her brain.

She knows they were friends but doesn't know her name. She didn't have to think hard as that girl was right in front of her. Opening her cell and escorting her out. Giving her a change of clothes from her civilian robes. They were escaping. She trusted her for a reason she has yet to understand. They'd made it out and onto a ship.

That's when they said their first words to each other. "I was worried about you." Mae looked around the ship. Everything seems familiar yet distant. Has she been here before? "What's wrong?"

"I lost my memories. The last thing I remember is my mother dying." Mae didn't know what she was thinking. Revealing something like that to a stranger. "We'll figure something out."

[ ... ]

"Do you know what could have caused you to lose your memories?"

"If I did I would have already gotten them back," you brought Mae to a hideout, you two had prepared incase of emergencies. Not like she knows it. You two spent most of your lives working together for the master. He hasn't told you anything or that even Mae was taken by the jedi. You didn't know why you expected him to tell you anything.

You'd hoped the place would bring back something but to no avail. If her mind had been wiped by using the force, you had zero clue how to get them back. But you will try everything to do so.

[ ... ]

Fighting? What a brilliant idea! "How is this gonna help me?" Mae had asked. As you started throwing punches. "You were a pretty good fighter. I'm just checking if you remember any of it." Mae thought this was a waste of time. But she still listened to you. At least you had an idea and so you fought.

It didn't seem to be working until Mae bested you. You fell on the mat, she was inches away from you. A memory appeared, the two of you after a fight. She is kissing you. She let you go and backed away. "That's enough for today." Throughout the day more flashes of the past came back. Just by looking at random objects. She realised you two were in love. Are in love?

Thanks for reading!

divider by @plutism

[talaok]

I've dreamed of this | Pt. IX

Summary: You are a part of the BAU, and for the longest time you and Dr. Spencer Reid had been best of friends, even when it was clear to everyone else, and at times to you, that you should be more than that, and when something almost happens on a night out with the team, everything is destined to change.

This is a double pov story (each chapter will be alternated between y/n's and spencer's pov)

Chapter summary: Penelope calls you, and causes a chain reaction

warnings: angst (please don’t be mad at me)

<if you want to be added to the tag-list comment or write to me>

previous part | next part

*I'm really sorry for the long wait*

y/n

even his couch felt more comfortable than your own.

It was like you were meant to be here, it felt, like you were meant to be here.

The moment you woke up this morning, your head against his chest, and his sweet amber eyes looking down at you, the only question scratching your mind was why? Why have I waited this long for something I now see, was everything I've always wanted, if not needed?

It didn't make sense,

but then again, it did.

He had told you not to move, begged you even, to promise you wouldn't leave, and you didn't know how to tell him that that wasn't even a possibility you had weighed.

He had, unwillingly, left for work, and left you in his sunny apartment, feeling at home in one that was not your own.

You had been here before, dinners with the team, crashing at his place, movie nights where he either spent the whole time translating the film, or complaining about the improbability portrayed in the ones you chose.

You had been here, sure, but never like this,

now, it was as if you were looking at a whole new flat, a whole new world, one where things did, work out, and where his dark green walls maybe weren't so bad after all.

You had this feeling in your chest you couldn't describe as you smiled brainlessly at the off tv, relieving every second of the past 12 hours.

"I'd be lying if I said I didn't want this- a lot, for a very long time"

"I don't think I've ever meant anything more"

"would you just please let me kiss you?"

" I could too"

"I like you y/n, I've liked you for a very long time, In a way, I had never had before, and I know this isn't ideal, that there are a lot of things we should consider and talk about, and I'm willing to do that, but I just thought you should know"

"I like you, and I'm serious about this"

All of it in your brain, a constant background above the silence around you.

it felt like a dream,

this couldn't be real,

right?

You had spent so much time fighting it, rationalizing all of it, your feelings for him, the way your heart would melt every time he blushed or smiled, and now there you were.

It all felt surreal.

This wasn't supposed to happen,

This was the forbidden fruit in the garden of Eden,

and still,

you had taken a bite of the apple,

and nothing had happened,

not yet anyway.

Ring Ring

Your phone was ringing.

"Hello?" you hadn't even looked at the caller ID

"hi gorgeous, how's it going?" You recognized Penelope's voice.

You smiled at that "great" you said "it's going great"

"Really? Emily said she talked to you yesterday and you seemed down"

"Oh yes" you recalled "well, everything is better now"

"Really?"

"yes, really Pen" you smiled at her thoughtfulness,

"So did you find some things to do?"

You had to hide a laugh "Yes-yes I definitely did"

"Cool like what?"

fuck

it wasn't like you could tell her the truth.

oh yeah, so I basically got into a relationship that I'd been avoiding for years with Spencer, our coworker.

That didn't seem like it would work out

"I- I started watching- " you looked around frantically, and your eyes spotted a book "I started watching the lord of the rings"

"the whole saga?" she asked, shocked

"yes, it's been keeping me occupied"

"Spencer's gonna be happy about that" she scoffed amusedly.

Your cheeks flushed just at the mention of his name "Speaking of which" she said, and you could hear the smirk on her lips "Wonderboy arrived late today" she snickered "word on the street is he's got a girlfriend"

"What?" the words fled your mouth before you could stop them

How was it possible they already knew?

Yes, they were profilers, but no profiler was that good.

"Yes, let's just say he must have forgotten about some marks the lucky lady left on his neck"

Shit

Shit shit shit

"oh" you could only breathe

"not to mention how distracted he is " she chuckled softly "he hasn't even done his crossword this morning" she whispered as if it was some sort of profanity,

which, of course, it kind of was,

Spencer never missed a day, the whole team knew it.

You didn't know what to say, and so you stayed silent.

You could feel Penelope's attitude shift "Shoot- listen I know you two were kind of... I don't know- something-" she trailed off "but maybe this is better you know, with the whole Hotch thing and you being friends"

"I mean it's not like a woman like you doesn't have a line of men waiting for her"

"We weren't- anything" you clarified

"Sorry, I probably shouldn't have told you" you could hear the sadness creeping up her voice.

"It's fine, Pen, I'm-I'm happy for him"

"alright," she said, even though both of you knew she was still mortified "well anyway I and the gals thought we could come by this afternoon to keep you company"

Oh fuck

they couldn't come by, you weren't even there.

"oh no don't do that"

really y/n? that's the best you could come up with?

"why?" Penelope asked

C'mon think of something

"I just- I'm feeling a bit sick"

"oh" she hummed "I'm sorry," she said, " why didn't you say anything before?"

"I just didn't want you to worry"

"I'm- I'm not " she lied plainly "I could make you some soup you know? I could bring it to you. Yes, you know what, I'm gonna get off work earlier and get started on it-"

"Wait Pen"

"yes?" she stopped her rambling, and it surprised you she still had air left in her lungs.

"I think it's best if I just rest a bit y'know?"

"Sure" she smiled, but you could tell she was disappointed and worried altogether "I understand"

"thank Pen, say hi to the team for me"

"of course" she nodded "take care of yourself"

"will do" you joked "bye now"

"bye"

You stared at the colorless reflection looking back at you from the black screen,

Your smile had faded,

The feeling in your belly had mutated,

more bitter now, the warmth slowly dissipating against the cold breeze.

You should have been happy right?

You had gotten away with it,

both of you had,

Yes, the team thought Spencer had a girlfriend, but they had no idea it was you.

And you were able to convince Penelope not to come by your house.

Everything went perfectly,

so why did you feel like this?

like a puff had just caused the unsteady house of cards to fall to the ground.

You had everything you wanted,

you had him,

you had you, together.

this wasn't how it was supposed to be,

you should be feeling ecstatic,

happy,

on fucking cloud nine,

but it was as if you had to woken up from the dream, from the fable, and reality was starting to hit.

You had lied to her,

to Penelope,

one of your best friends, a person who knew everything about you, a person who'd seen you cry and laugh and puke more times than you'd like to admit.

You had to lie

Make up a bunch of things and lie to her face like it was normal, like nothing was wrong with that.

But so much was wrong with it,

And not only because it made you feel dirty, and shitty, no, but because she didn't deserve it.

She would never do it to you, you knew.

And still, you hadn't even hesitated before doing it to her.

And as much as you liked to think that it was necessary, and that it wasn't gonna be forever, you had no real guarantee that that was the truth

You had never really thought about it,

and apparently, all it took was a phone call for the pandora's box lid to fly off, and your mind was now flooding with doubts and fear, and second thoughts.

When were you gonna be able to tell people?

never, was the only answer you could think of,

You weren't allowed to date,

because of Hotch's rule,

And it's not like you could have told everyone but him, that seemed practically impossible.

So that was it, either one of you left the BAU or you would have to keep it a secret forever, continuing to lie every single day.

The thought of it terrified you,

And with it, millions more started clouding your mind.

__ __ __

"hello"

you had been crying

"hi" you smiled weakly from the couch

He threw his sachel on a chair and walked up to you immediately, bending to meet his lips with yours.

It felt good, too good.

"I've missed you" he sat next to you, a big smile on his face "I couldn't wait to get home" he confessed shily "I don't think anybody suspects anything though, so we're in the clear" he moved a lock of hair behind your ear, and his brows furrowed "what's wrong?"

You didn't know where to begin,

a tsunami of emotions was going off inside of you, and you had no idea how to get them out.

"Penelope called" you finally said

"ok" you could tell he was confused "that's good right?"

yes, Spencer, that's supposed to be good.

God, you felt like you were going crazy.

"I lied to her"

"what do you mean?"

"she said she wanted to come to my house, and I said I was sick"

"Oh" he breathed "that's-that's ok, I mean that's like a - white lie"

You could only look at him, tears threatening to spill out of your eyes.

"And you know, you could have gone back home, that would have b-"

"that's not the point Spencer" your voice broke " I lied to her, and- and I'm gonna have to keep doing it"

"what? no that's not true" he placed a hand on your thigh, trying to reassure you.

"We can't tell anyone Spence you know it"

"Well I mean we could tell her, just not Hotch"

"and how that gonna work?" you asked way too harshly.

"I'm sorry I just- there's a lot of things we haven't thought of"

"I know y/n I know" he stoaked your cheek "but we can work it out"

Oh, you so wanted to give in, to tell him that yes, maybe you could and that he was right, but you knew that wasn't the truth, as much as it pained you to say it, he was wrong.

"How?" you said "We're gonna get fired if Hotch finds out, and unless one of us wants to leave the team we're gonna have to keep it a secret," you explained with a weak voice "and I don't know-" you couldn't believe you were about to say it "I don't know if I can do it, Spencer"

It was like you had just punched him in the face,

his eyes went blank, as his smile disappeared.

"I'm sorry" you cried "I'm so sorry Spence this is all my fault I should have never come here, please- i'm so sorry" you reached for his hand.

"y/n-" he tried to talk but you interrupted him

"no, please don't try to change my mind" you begged "It's- It's not only Hotch, Spence" you confessed

"You're my friend," you said "before this, before everything you're my friend Spence, and- and you mean everything to me, y'know" you sighed "and if- if this doesn't work out I don't wanna lose you, I can't, I can't lose you, I don't think I could do it without you"

"And I know this is gonna mess things up for a bit but I hope we could still be friends because I need that Spence, I need you as I friend, and I'm scared that if we do this, like really do this, and learn we've made a mistake, then I'm gonna lose you forever, and I can't let that happen"

You hadn't noticed the tears fleeing your eyes, because your sight was fixated on him, his mouth slightly parted, his eyes still in shock.

"I-" he swallowed thickly, his eyes scanning your face "You're never gonna lose me y/n" he said "we can work this out"

"This can't be how this ends"

"I'm sorry" was all you could say

"Y/n the moment I met you, the moment you smiled and introduced yourself, I knew I wanted this, the first time I saw you laugh I thought I was gonna have a heart attack y/n, I-I- I spent the last four years of my life stealing glances at you, and planning things to do or say to make you happy." he breathed "you can't do this y/n, not now"

"I'm sorry" your lip was trembling

"please forgive me Spence but I think it's best if I go" you got up and quickly grabbed your purse just to dash to the door,

but he followed

"y/n" you turned, and he was just there, inches from you, just like that night at the bar "y/n, I lov-"

"no, don't" you covered his mouth, a sob creeping up your throat "please don't"

You let your hand fall, taking a step to be flush against him, your mouth ghosting his "this is for the best" you breathed, hopeless "I can't lose you Spence" you kissed him, fully, desperately, like it was the last time you were ever gonna do it, because, of course, it was "please understand"

you whispered,

and without looking back,

you were out of his apartment.

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[shutupheathersorryheatherr]

"Secrets in everything: Letters, neighbors, and things only walls will tell you"

Hello everyone! I'm so sorry that i haven't posted a fic in a while! it seems like i only post one every two to four weeks at this point ughhhh anyways ive written this fic for a friend but also for yall as well so i hope yall like it! after this fic im gonna work on an ask then so ill hopefully have that up soon for the person who sent it in! A little picture collage will be coming VERY soon lmao i didn't have time to make one yet. This fic all started when i was having some Minghao brain rot and stumbled upon this prompt about wifi names: "apt 203 is loud as fuck" "apt ??? say it to my face bitch" strangers to lovers and shit ya know? i cannot express how sorry i am that this is late! I put it in my que and since it didn't post when i wanted it to, i tried posting it on my own and it wouldn't let me. in summery: never using que again

anyways here are the warnings/info: cursing, smut, Very heavy on the smut, speaking of sex like it's something you need and not just want if you squint, slightly hinted at romance between hao and reader i guess idk, but you could just as easily read it as friendly affection, Minghao gets drunk and is a wee bit stupid, reader is on top, reader is referred to using they/them pns but has a vagina and tits, and a very nice ass that minghao likes to grab throughout this fic lmao, Minghao is thirsty for reader, reader is thirty for Minghao, Minghao keeps how he made the wifi name a secret from reader but it eventually comes out at the end, mutual masterbation.... through a wall if that makes sense, oral sex (f. receiving) hand job, protected sex (be safe, ya'll), shitty ending lol, friends to friends with benefits, writing out sex dreams? Minghao says something while drunk and can’t undo it although he wants to

~this is simply a piece of fiction. My imagination onto “paper”. This is in no way is meant to be taken as an actual and real representation of anyone~

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Thoughts lead to desires, desires lead to actions. Thats what kept replaying itself in Minghaos head the second he hit enter on his phone to change his wifi name. He'd heard it when he was a kid. Somewhere he couldn't quite remember. But now, suddenly, it was burning so fresh in his mind he couldn't get it out. He sighed to himself as he put down his cup. Looking down at his phone screen with and various other wifi names popping up bellow the words he cannot believe he just wrote. "apt303isloudasfuck"

He really shouldn't be doing this. This is why he shouldn't drink, he thinks to himself. Especially since whenever he saw you rushing out to work or school, or wherever you carried yourself to each morning. He swears his heart does a flipping routine.

And this? If you found out it was him telling everyone in the radius of your apartments that you're loud? It could ruin whatever you two don't already have. He thinks that maybe he'll just try his best not to be seen by you. Like, ever again. The problem with that though is how you both need to leave at about the same time to get to wherever you're going. And besides, maybe he did kinda want to mess around with you a little bit. Maybe that'll teach you to keep it down. If it wasn't loud music then it was some... other noises. Sounds of you, moaning and groaning. Making a mess of yourself behind his wall. Or, maybe somebody was the one making your words incorrect and moans fall from your lips.

or maybe the latter was your roommate. Cause as much as he didn't want to admit it, he didn't want to believe it was you who was getting pleasured by other people. Cause damn, he really wanted to be the one making you moan like that. He didn't even know you, so who's making you cum shouldn't be any of his concern. And it wasn't! Much. He wants to be the one making you feel good, bringing you to orgasm with his tongue. And he didn't like to think about the fact that other men were making you feel the way he wanted to.

But, none the less, whenever he did hear you, with only the thin sheetrock wall between each of your headboard. Thin enough to where he could hear you so clearly as if you were right there in front of him. He sure did enjoy the verbal show you put him through; fisting his cock until his tears made him bleary eyed and he couldn't take it anymore- his hand drenched with own cum from orgasming a million times along with you but still never feeling relived. So he always kept going until the pain of overstimulation was too much to bare. For you, all for you.

That was when one night he realized he didn't hear anyone else moaning along side you. Come to think of it he never really did. Sure, sometimes but not every night. that meant you were pleasuring yourself? The sounds started so suddenly he didn't have time to react. The thought of your fingers pleasuring yourself, pumping them in and out of you, covered with your slick and rubbing your clit? It drove him crazy, It was music to his ears. He could listen to your beautiful sounds forever.

He didn't even have the time to pause the show he was watching on his phone, taking his other headphone out of his ear so quickly that it landed off the surface of the bed. Where his headphones ended up wasn't really a concern for him. Cause in that moment all he could think about was you. He could always rewind it later. That is, if he ever could stop pleasuring himself to the echoes of your voice, even after you stopped. Cause for him, once he started he could never stop with you. You were too addictive for him. The way to talked, the way you'd always leave a little note with the bundle of mail you'd drop off at his door when ya'lls would get mixed up. Whenever he'd come home to see it he couldn’t have been more glad for apartment numbers to get mixed up and a mail person who did their job a little too quickly at your building sometimes. Albeit he was a little sad he didn't catch you; but he liked the look of your handwriting-- it was cute, he thought.

but fast forward a little later and he’s starting to write back. And not just when you mail gets mixed up, either. Just little sticky notes he taps on your door ending with smiley faces and exclamation points. You start writing him back, too. And before you two know it you’re sharing notes ripped out of full notebooks with arrows pointing to the back because you still have more to say but never enough room. He seems so easy and just oh so caring through this words the more you two find yourselves awaiting the pages you’d put in the others mail boxes. Finding yourselves excited more and more for the familiar hand writing inked on clean white paper. You two talk about anything and everything. But don’t be fooled, cause minghao spends the better half of his dinner time making sure each and every letter in his letters to you are legible. He feels like a little schoolboy trying to impress you with his neat handwritten and well detailed sentences. But he can’t help it; he just wants you to think he’s somebody. Somebody worth spending your time with and talking to. He doesn’t know why but he feels like, especially with the more he’s talking to you, he wants you to view him as someone cool. Great, he thinks. Now he definitely sounds like a little kid.

would you mind? He asks himself. Would you mind that he’s a little desperate for you? So desperate that he lays in bed and stays awake a little longer now because he wants to hear your sweet voice react as you pleasure yourself again for the hundredth time? He hopes not. But, just like that new Wi-Fi name he’s chosen for his router, that’ll stay between him and his apartment’s ceiling. The thing he looks up at in both instances. Sometimes when he gets reminded of what you’d think of him if you if it ever got out that he wrote the “apt303isloudasfuck” and how he doesn’t understand why he still has it up. And the other time he looks up at the ceiling is with his mouth agape, his lips wet from his tongue running over them with each torturing stroke of his hand over his bulge in his pants. The fabric constricting him to were it was painful every time. But not wanting to stop touching himself for long enough to slip down his pants. (The response on the Wi-Fi thing only comes after they talk o each other face to face. “…and when he checked his phone again, looking down at the bright alumina red screen with tires eyes, there was another name quite similar to the one he put down as his one. ‘Apt???sayittomyfacebitch’

he slammed down his phone onto the nearest surface (which just happened to be his lap. Yeah… not the best idea) but believe it or not he wasn’t really thinking about that right now. You responded?? Well, he doesn’t know who would call “apt???sayittomyfacebitch” a real response like oh, I don’t know, “yeah, my day’s going great.” But you noticed? Well then again it would be pretty hard to disregard when your apartment is getting dragged through the mud with a wifi name. But this made him even more worried. This means you’ve definitely seen it. And based on what you said…. You were probably looking for the person who wrote that. What if you found out it was him? Is this why you were taking an interest in him all of a sudden? No, he believed in his ability to conceal it from you enough to know you’d never find out. That’s when, with this new information clouding his good judgment he just had to grab the neatly folded paper from his bedroom desk and walk out his door. A little potted plant was the only thing separating yours and his places of residence from each other. One put up and watered every Saturday morning. He patted down the backside of his hair as he made sure not to ruin the paper he so neatly folded for you. Realizing he forgot tape to stick it to your door, he was About to go and get some when he heard movement behind the heavy door that lead into your apartment. rustling of footsteps and cloths. And before he knew it your face had appeared in front of him, door swung into your foyer. He couldn’t just leave now. You had seen him. So he tried his best to put on a not awkward smile as your eyes lit up the dim outside hallway he was standing in. Your presence seemed to replace the light bulb that had been missing the fast few days in the overhead lights. “Hey, Minghao. Nice to see you.”

you remembered his name?? His name? The person who let everyone know how loud your apt was? Of course you did. What else? You’d started off almost each and every letter to him with his name in one way or another. Oh great, now he was thinking about all of your letters to him. Everything you had shared with each other from the depths of both of your hearts. How the fucking hell was he supposed to look you in the eyes when you knew how, when he was in high school, he had fallen on his actual face trying to reach his pencil when it had fallen underneath his desk. Leaned too far out of his chair and then boom! Face planted. How was any human being supposed to look someone they considered a friend in the eye when all you two did was trade letters to each other because of your busy schedules? Not to mention how he’d been stupid enough to let it slip that he can barely open a bag of chips without it busting out the bottom too. But, he remembers, it did make you laugh. So maybe he could do this. He’d made you laugh and carried quite deep and just plain old nice conversations with you over letters for months. What was so hard about doing them with you face to face?

He gave you a smile as you slid to the side. “Hi. I was just dropping your note off.” He says. How could you be so cool calm and collected, he wondered. Meanwhile, you were asking yourself the same thing about your neighbor. The neighbor you couldn’t stop thinking about. The way he talked to freely with you, how you two just seemed to click after the first note; bouncing off of each others jokes and becoming friends. You’d considered giving him your number but you kind of liked getting to know him off paper through his best hand writing. You’d never tell him, but you secretly had a pile of folded papers in the top drawer of your desk you’d written out of him. Never sent. And probably, considering the contents of those letters, never will be. He shows you the folded note, this time on different paper, you notice. You take it out of his hands as you gesture for him to come inside. “Are you sure?” He gulps. You looked at him like he was crazy, shrinking back a little. “Dude, get inside.” You chuckled. He wasn’t usually like this. You think back to all the letters he’s sent you. And come up with not much to make you think he’d be like this around you. You certainly didn’t want him to be like that. after all you’ve talked about with each other you’ve come to know someone, even if it is only over paper… someone who you consider a friend. That’s another reason why you could never send him those letters. They had… things in there that two friends wouldn’t never think of the other. Or at least admit them out loud to them. But, with the way he handled himself now, which wasn’t that much different from his letters. But more uptight now that was standing by your coat hangers by the door and bending down to take off his shoes. You didn’t know what, but something was off with him. He was jittery, lol he had just snorted a two cups of sugar on the way out his door. His eyes darted around like he was in an awkward setting. So, you tried you best to make him as comfortable as possible.

you lead him through your apartment and into the living room. He took a deep breath. He wants to tell you that he’s not always like how he is now: palms sweating, and unable to talk much. You just overwhelm him to the point where his mind is clouded and his actions seem off. It shouldn’t be a problem for him though, you talk to each other multiple times a day. Like, full on conversations. But now it all feels just a little too real with you hovering over him as he sits down on your sofa, trying to remember that you’re both friends. He comes back to earth with you weave you hand in his face. You laugh nervously at his distraction. “You didn’t hear a thing I just said, did you?” Shit shit shit. This really isn’t a good look for him. “No,” he hangs his head low for a second, “im sorry I didn’t.” You lean back and seem to relax a little bit. It almost looks like you’re just as in need to relax as he is.

Just didn’t have have the horrible talent of not being able to hide it well. It wasn’t his fault. He was already trying his best not to get hard. Having to not act nervous and flustered over seeing your pretty faces too? That was a lot to ask of Minghao. That’s why he sat down. And why he was crossing his legs in hopes of trying to distract himself from the yearning for you inside him. For him to have all of you. For him to make you sound just like you do when he hears you in your room. God, all he ever dreamed of now was you writhing is pleasure above him as he tongued your clit. Or you wrapped some tightly around his cock he felt like you were trying to choke him and make him cum. “I said my roommate isn’t home.” Oh, so you did have one, “and asked if you wanted something to drink.” It made him feel strangely comforted though, that you also were feeling the same as him.

He agreed readily. Finding it easy to make room to spend more time with you. You came back not a couple minutes later and ploped down next to him, your chin in your palm. You didn’t want to admit it, but fuck he looked so beautiful in person. It made you wanna curl up on your sofa and immerse yourself in him all day. You’d be content with just staying here and doing just that, making up for All the missed times where you could’ve been already. But no, you kept yourselves mostly behind the pen and paper. Scribbles and commas became your only form of sight into what the other looked like. You didn’t even realize how long you’d been carrying out your plan to stare at him until he shifted a little farther back into the cushion. “Is it just me or is that way more awkward than it should be?” He chuckles, taking a sip of his drink. And then getting a sickly little whispering reminder of how he was now: drink in hand, phone in reach— was not that unlike the situation where the secret he has to keep from you now came about. But no, he can’t think of that right now. He’s trying to keep his mind free of anything that could jeopardize your friendship. And thinking of the one thing he’ll never be able to tell you might do the trick if he doesn’t stop. But strangely, the idea of you finding out— the idea of you strongly telling him to take the fucking thing down doesn’t do anything but make him want you more inside. You telling him-- no, ordering him to take it down.He didn't know what or why, but it made him reach all new kinds of levals of excitement. Anticipation of what you could do to him. How you’d moan for him and writhe under his touch. The possibility we’re endless and he couldn’t stop thinking up new ones.

There’s an un spoken rule between the two of you… both of you made noise. Noise that neither of you really minded because it brought you so much pleasure. But in all your writings to each other, you’d never talk about it. That was the rule: don’t bring up what happens at night. A Thought Leeds to a desire, and a desire Leeds to an action. So you tried not to talk about it, no you even theirs noting to think about it, was there?

All you needed to do was get through this night. As... friends. Because that was what you two were-- friends. Noting more, noting less. Didn't matter than you imagined him every night you were alone and needed relief. Him and that cute smile of his. Him reaching up to fix the light in your little corner of hallway on your floor of your apartment. The way his shirt rode up, exposing his waist. God, you'd do just about anything to have his skin under your fingers. Feeling the softness of his tummy.

"So you said there's some shows you never got to watch because you dont have the streaming service?" You shook your mind out of its dangerous thoughts. providing an easier environment not to pounce on him; less... tempting when you were thinking of watching tv with him and not being on top of him. His shirt on the floor. He nods, leaning impossibly closer to your already heavy breathing form. Didn't he realize the effect he had on you? You gulped, hopefully not loud enough to hear. You didn't need this to go anywhere that wasn't what normal friends do. "My roommate pays for one of the places that show you were talking about plays on." You look him dead in the eyes as you reach for the remote.

You had planned on just doing so as a question to him weather he wanted to watch anything. But it turned into the most arousing staring contest youd ever been a part of. You looked into his eyes, forgetting to blink. You felt that if you did you might miss commenting about the way they flickered and shone. There was something else in them, though. His pupils were blown wide. somehow making his eyes even darker. You wondered what he could be thinking about. But that didn't really matter, did it? Because what you should've been focusing on was how to move away from him

You were so close you could feel his body heat like a radiator. How was he not sweating? You felt like the sun was right in front of you. Meanwhile, Minghao was wondering the same thing. The ac kicked on at just the right time because he didn't know how much longer he could keep himself from visibly overheating. That was the last thing he needed right now. You got up on your knees to reach for your glass. Why did you have to do things that drove him wild? Did you know deep down that you were torturing him with every move? It was stupid and desperate for him to have to control himself so much after the little you were giving him. It wasn't much, but it was teasing him. It all made him crave more. It was childish and desperate of him to be like this with you. But he didn't really care anymore. After knowing you-- even if it was only from swapping letters, he couldn't get enough of you. If you ever stopped taping letters to his door then he'd beg on his knees for you to continue. He didn't care that it seemed desperate because it was. He was. Desperate for more of you. Just like he was now. So much so that when you leaned forward again to pick up the remote to turn the volume up of a show that he'd been wanting to watch for months, but somehow with you it sounded like background noise. He couldn't pay full attention to it for the life of him because You were Right There. Next to him. Smiling and chuckling and genuinely enjoying what you were watching with him. The smile he hoped beyond compare that youd have when reading his letters. He'd only seen it a few times in person, but, a feeling bubbled up into his chest. The same one he feels every time reading your writings to him.

He felt and aching in his groin. If his eyes weren't as wide as saucers before, then they definitely were now. He didn't even need to look down. More afraid to than anything. If he took his eyes of either you or the tv-- things that he wanted to be real, things that were real... Well, he doesn't know what that'll do but he doesn't want to acknowledge it thats for sure. He really doesn't want it to be real. This cannot be happening. Not here, not right now. but How could he not be half hard when you could lean over and kiss him right now if you wanted and hed let you? How could he not be half hard right now with you looking so god damn otherworldly? When all these plush sofa cushions made him want to do was to bring you on top of him and rub you on his thighs and cock until you made a mess on his sweats? It was impossible. He searched whatever space was left in his near thought cleared, empty and short circuiting brain, using what he thought where his last few brain cells that weren't occupied with you to think of what to do about his problem. His eyes landed on a pillow on the back of your sofa, likely moved out of the way for more room. Quickly as to avoid suspicion, he glided it down from its perch and on top of his growing erection.

Little did he know that you had turned the tv up to drown out your own thoughts. Thoughts you didn't need of him. Never doing you any good other than frustrating you further. Making you desire him more. Nearly an hour later and you two had sunken further into the sofa... and each other. Thoughts lead to desire, and desires lead to action. That was what you had to keep repeating to yourself over and over until youd hopefully get the point to stop thinking of those beautiful, soft looking lips. Didn't help that his tongue was fucking darting out to wet them every two seconds. You couldn't help but stare at them. It wouldn't hurt if you just leaned a little closer, would it? Friends cuddle on their sofas while watching the tv all the time.

And your ac was running a little high. But instead of getting up to turn it down like you usually would have to, I don't know, not waste your money. You stayed just like how you were, grateful for the excuse you could readily have available to you if he asked. But to your surprise he didn't. Although he did press the pillow more firmly into his lap. If you didn't know better you would've thought the pillow was made of gold or something. Like it was his teddy bear or something. You couldn't even think of anything else besides how badly you wanted to push both the pillow and preferably also his shirt off of him and shove him down into the sofa.

This was pathetic, you thought. A new low for you, even. This was your first time spending more than a couple minutes with the guy face to face and... not like it was awkward. No, not at all. You had been friends for six months or so over letters. But being with him. No, being so fucking close to him on this damn sofa was making you desire him even more.

That was it, now! Great, you'd already crossed one line of thinking about what youd like to do to him. Now you were starting to desire it, too. Not much longer and you feared you'd take action on those thoughts and desires. You really needed to make your self think of anything anything that would save you from this self induced peril.

"Did you see that weird ass wifi name?" Your words almost made minghao jump out of his seat. Steadying his pillow over his lap (his stupid fucking boner still hadn't gone away) And clearing his throat, he finally responded. "Oh? That? No, I haven't. What is it?" He tried sounding airy, nonchalant, free as a bird. "You know, that wifi name that had popped up what, about six months ago?" You seemed to ask yourself the question, pausing for a minute before continuing, "Around the same time you and I started talking. It says-- actually, lemme pull it up right now. Its fuckin hilarious." You whip out your phone before he could say another word and before he could even take another calming deep breath you were reaching over him, check pressed up against his upper arm, showing him the wifi name he made but couldn't tell you about. Why does he keep it on there anyways? He doesn't really want to even admit the only to reason he's come up with to himself. One was that yeah, your apartment was loud and it felt nice to have this. Even if you could one day find out and ruin whatever this thing he had with you was. Number two was that maybe it did make him painfully hard to think about what youd do to him if you found out. Use his cock for your own pleasure for hours until he was crying from overstimulation? Tell him not to cum until you tell him to, touching him in ways that'll make him let out embarrassingly loud noises for you, telling him that if he came without permission youd punish him cause he was a bad boy? Everything that could happen? He couldn't get them out of his head

"That's weird." He chuckled, scratching behind his neck, "Never saw it." He seemed nervous. But you were kind of liking his blushing face and puppy dog eyes. But Really? You thought. For some reason, your shitty building interfered with even the best of wifi providers. So most people had to reconnect their devices to their wifis every once and a while. Maybe he was on a part of the building where it wasn't as bad? Or maybe he paid extra for better wifi? It didn't really matter.

A little later at you had gotten up to refill both of your drinks. Little did you know Minghao had followed right behind you. He didn't really know what that said about him, all he knew was that he didn't want to be separated from you just yet. Even if it only was for a few minutes. He hadn't had his fill of you. Though, he doesn't think he ever will. You could feel him behind you. His presence, just like every other time he talked to you, was heavy as lead in the air. You could smell his cologne, too. And you didn't mind that the smell would linger in your apartment and stick to your sofa for longer than he'd be here.

You didn't, however, really pay much mind to how close he was. Nor did he, honestly. Neither of you really could care or complain, though. As when you turned around you came face to face oh so closely with your houseguest. The gap between you was small enough to where the cups in your hands pressed neatly against his chest, making your knuckles dig into his skin enough to feel his body heat. Also close enough were you could feel how much he really enjoyed being so close to you. You backs away, not nearly as fast as someone caught in this situation would usually be like.

Although missing your presence so close to him, he knows he needs to pull away from you. You were probably grossed out because of him now. And yes, maybe one day he would've told you how he feels, this was not the way he wanted it to go at all! He can't believe he just did this-- not remember the thing he's been trying so hard to hide? He wishes he could go back in time and slap himself in the face for even thinking that getting up without something to cover his crotch was a good idea. To his surprise though, you smile at him knowingly. And before either of you has a chance to think about what you're doing, you pull him closer to you. Just like you had been before. Expect now theres no barriers of fear between the two of you.

His hands fall limp at his sides. Yours slide up his torso. Both of you wanted this; to move closer. But it seemed like just as before, neither were going to make the first move. But you liked him this close. And even if noting was going to come of what you had just done besides nervous laughs and turning heads in the future, you would be glad to have his body this close to yours in your memory. His hands ghost your hips. A shiver runs its way up your spine at the phantom touch. "Was that a good sigh?" He asks. Lost in the throw of everything about him, you hadn't even realized you had let one out. "Of course it is." You say, trying to bring him even closer. You see him swallow hard before bringing his lips closer to yours.

It takes all of your willpower-- a source that was already dramatically dwindling once he got here. To not yank him in and smash you lips to his. Something you've been wanting to do for a while. But with his hands planted so wonderfully on your hips: firm but still delicate enough to never crush a flower. You're not sure how much longer you can hold out. He takes the next step: leaning a little closer to you. By now your faces are mere inches apart. "This is bad..." He whispers, his fingers now hooked in your belt loops. Because, he knows that if he gives in now, he'll neve able able to stop. Wrapped around your finger. "Maybe," you whisper, tongue darting out to lick your lips, an act his eyes followed with concentration. You loved the look-- wide eyed and begging, it looked beautiful on him. You wanted more. "But this is the good kind of bad, hm?" You suggest. He nods slightly, still focused on your lips. Not like you aren't with his. As you close whatever gap was remaining between the two of you. Prohibiting you from being as close to him as you wanted. As you desired.

This felt so good, so natural. A blissful feeling you adored with all your heart. Even only a few seconds in. Minghao really wanted to take this slow, take his time with you. But the aching in his pants were starting to become painful. A glorious moment of feeling his lips on yours later and he's pushing you against your kitchen counter. His kisses becoming as urgent at yours. You never really tried to be gentle. After the first kiss-- the first second or two of him kissing you? You would be dumb to hold back.

He pressed himself into you even more. His knee slotting between your legs. His mouth was hot. Same as the growing feeling in the pit of your stomach. He parts his pretty lips-- the same ones youve had dream after dream of wrapped around your clit. You moaned into his mouth when he stopped gasping your belt loops like they were life support and griped your hips with newfound vigor. You deepen the kiss even more, something you weren't sure was possible.

His weight on top of you was driving you crazy. He pulled away from air, breathing heavy into your mouth. Your name on the tip of his lips. You couldn't stand not having them on you again. You felt his body tense when you pull him back to you. But this time your lips only ghosted his, fluttering over them. Only making him want you more. Before moving to the soft skin of his neck, leaving a trail of kisses there that made his body go slack against yours.

Your fingers prickled and tingled as you slid your hands up his bare back, his shirt already halfway untucked. His tongue explored your mouth with vigor. At a time like this you were grateful for the counter to support your weakening legs. Not like you were really thinking of that anyway now, though. All this time you only had one thing in your mind: to make him want you, to be on top of him making him moan for you without let up. But now you weren't too sure if you were going to be the only one doing so. You couldn't hold back anymore. You needed to feel some sort of friction. By now your underwear was soaked ; you could feel the fabric cling to your wet pussy. All you wanted was for him to take them off of you. Pulling them to the side to finger would be just as good. You didn't care, you just need something form him. Anything.

"Fuck--" You inhaled sharply, grinding your hips against his thigh. Your apartment was getting colder no doubt . But even with his back exposed neither of you were shivering. Both too lost in how you made each other feel. You couldn't seem to get enough of him. Even if you've been reading his letters every day. Your fingers made their way to his beautiful, soft hair-- hair only and angel would have. So pretty and otherworldly it seemed unreal under your fingertips. As he moved down to your next. Though his lips never seemed to want to leave yours. He spent a while on your jawline, kissing in the spot where your neck met your face until it was beautifully numb. The good kind of numb that made your eyes roll into the back of your head. The spot would no doubt the tinder later on in the day. But you felt oddly pleased to have a reminder of him on your skin for as long as you could. Even after going a little further down to lick and gently press his pretty lips to the front of your throat, he still chased your lips like a man deprived of your kisses as if he didn't have them a moment ago. But once he fully focusses on his task he is unstoppable.

Every drag of his tongue on your felt like a delicious mix between torture and heaven. The feeling he was making erupt inside you was like no other you'd ever felt. And you never wanted him to stop. Of course, with the first coherent though in your brain for him to never stop, he did. This time his eyes finding yours, having a question in them. You nod. and with that he goes even lower. Your color bone becoming wet and sticky with his saliva. You pull his hair down to keep him there. You're still moving on his thigh. But it isn't enough. Not like it ever was. God, what you'd do in that moment to have his mouth on your pussy. He emerged back up to your face, looking at your with needy eyes. A second later and his lips are on yours. He melts into you, begging looks never forgotten as you flip him around so that now he was flush with the counter. He makes a sound of agreement as you start working on his neck desperately, just like he had done with you. With the thought of his fingers, his thigh was long forgotten by the both of you. Now you didn't think that it could ever do justice when all you could think about is his slender fingers and how they were gliding up your sides right now.

He tilts his neck back to give your more access as he bucks his hips into you. Both things you wish you had thought of sooner. "I-I-" He mumbles, not really knowing what he was going to say anyways. Even with just your lips on his neck, words dying in his mouth, all he can think about is them as you make your way up and down his skin there. All he can think about is ho soft they are. All he can think about is how they'd feel wrapped around his aching cock that was now pressed up against you. And now that all hes thinking about is having more of you he can't help put let out a strangled moan, as it rips from his throat he realizes that it's probably too loud for something as little as you sucking on his neck. But at this point he doesn't really care. He just wants to you to know how good you're already making him feel.

As soon as you pull his shirt over his head was as soon as his expression changed. His eyes seem to focus on reality now, breathing starting to steady. The look of need and pure fucking lust for you stays the same though. You plan on making it stay that way again and again. Even if you don't get to do anything more than kissing with grinded with him. Just to see the look in your eyes would be enough to bring you to your high on your own. "I dont wanna do this here. bed?" he asks with puppy dog eyes. How could you refuse him?

he grips your ass and kneads it-- strong grip, but with a kind of softness you can't deny, as you lead him to your bedroom. More like stumble into it, your lips never leaving each other. Locked with the key thrown away. To involved in the kiss he nearly bumps into the door frame of your bedroom. You jerk him away, finding it endearing when he chases the plush of your pretty lips. He realizes the you’d just saved him a bump on the head. “Well, guess that’s on walking backwards. Maybe—“ no time to think. You grab his hands with a primal, animalistic strangled sound. You needed him. Now. You grind into his lap, trying to find some sort of relief in the fabric of his pants and the flesh of his thigh. “Ah— don’t stop” he whines out, head thrown back like this was the best thing in the world he’s ever felt. At your hands. you almost stop in surprise. But his words have such an effect on you that you don’t think you can. Now you have to keep feeling him.

He doesn't know why or what came over him, but in a flash his hand his wrapped around your wrist and bringing it to his crotch, helping you feel how hard he is through his pants. "Shit— baby. See what you do to me?" Where this sudden courage came from, he doesn't know. But you have to know how crazy he is about you. you have to. He needs you to know. You shiver at the feeling of him beneath your hand. You nod at him, barely trusting your own words. You continued to rock into him, clenching your teeth. He reaches down between the two of you, watching his fingers as they snake right were you need him. Even if still covered in the confines of your pants. (Neither of you thought you could ever hate clothes as much as you did in that moment. They weren't doing you any good.) the wonderful feeling of him on your clothed pussy felt like no other. Now that you had a taste of his fingers, just as before with his thigh and just like a second ago with his hard length, you could never go back to something smaller. It just kept getting better and better. Now that you felt his fingers, noting else could compare. The desire for them was about to lead into action. But you couldn't care less. "I-Is this ok?" He asks. And youre taken aback. Him? Asking if you liked it when you couldn't even think straight enough to keep sucking on his neck like before, resorting to pressing a few kisses there in the meantime.

"You're doing great." You say, trying to keep any shakiness out of your voice. You dont want him to know how much of a n effect he has on you. He searches for your clit in a way that only made you want him more. Was he teasing you or was this real? You couldn't take it anymore: you unbutton your jeans and slide them down a bit, taking his hand and shoving it down to feel your wetness. He audibly gulps. Hard. You doesn't think he could ever move from this position: with his hand warm and damp with your arousal. When he doesn't do anything, his hand just idly underneath you, you say, "What? Nervous baby?" You laugh. Almost condescendingly. He gets the point a second later, shaking himself out of his daze. He wonders what this all says about him-- that he can't function the minute his hand is on your pussy. You grind yourself on his hand, his palm brushing against your clit every time your rock yourself on him. The fucking sounds in the air. Minghao doesn't think he'll be able to last very long with the obscene, almost pornographic squelching and panting he hears ringing in his ears. He finally takes his fingers into your ruined underwear, other hand that was feeling up your ass goes to your face, bringing you in for a hard and passionate kiss when he glides them inside of you.

At this point the kiss doesn't surprise you, you've come to have an inkling that he likes them. Or maybe, he just likes having them with you. It was bad, you knew that, but you didn't really care either way. Too lost in how his fingers curled inside of you just right. You were so warm, so wet and tight. He could just imagine what youd feel like on his cock. Meanwhile you? You didn't think you ever felt something so easily good. Just in an instant, he made you feel like he had everything you wanted and then some. Things you couldn't imagine just beyond your reach. You reel your head back and squeeze your eyes shut tight, trying to focus on not cumming so fast. He bucks his hips up onto your wet heat when he saw your face.

How was he making you feel this good? To the point were you were sighing and groaning and looking so fucking good? If his fingers weren't knuckle deep into your pussy, and his other hand wasn't pressed flat on the skin of your back, he'd pinch himself. Was this real? It sure didn't feel like it. Your hand his still on his wrist, holding him just were you need him. Forcing him to stay there. It wasn't like he'd ever want to leave you thought. He can't think of a single better feeling right now than your warm and tight pussy. He doesn't think the feeling could ever leave his mind if he could ever peel himself away from your bed once this is all said and done. But secretly, there's two things he doesn't know if he should admit yet. One: that he wants you to ask him to stay. He knows its only three in the afternoon... or at least it was when he got here.

(Thats another thing, ever since he go there all sense of time seemed to leave his brain. vanish along with his sanity into thin air.) He doesn't want to have to think about "when this is all said and done" and he has to tredge his way next door to his own bed. His own bed where all he'll have are the memories of you writhing and panting for him. Because of him. The ghost of your around his fingers, dripping onto his palm. And number two: is that your iron grip on his wrist did noting but turn him on more for you. Which, Minghao didn't even think was possible until now. But something about you making him stay right there where you needed him, helping him make you feel good... Something about that made his brain cloud and fog up enough to almost slow his pace inside of you. He guessed he just liked it when you took charge of him. Even in small ways like these. "Mmhm," You sound pleased, your hand never leaving his wrist and the other never leaving his bare torso, almost silently asking him to stay down, "Just like that." And at that moment he doesn't think he could ever feel better than how he does with that look on your face. You needed more. It was stupid, really. To just keep taking and taking and taking. But it looked like he was enjoying himself just as much as you were. "Please--" his beg meets your ears as you look down at him. His smooth skin under your hand, his pretty waist and nipples, everything,

"Eyes open..." For a second he seems lost for words, now desperate in his movements against you "I need to see you." Your lids snap open at his request. You couldn't see any reason to deny him. And it wasn't like you didn't want to take a moment to let his body sink into your mind. You run your hands up and down his torso, feeling every inch of him. Minghao shivers at the contact just like you did him but he doesnt make one move to turn away. How was he so god damn sensitive? And just from you feeling him up, too? But you wanted to remember what he felt like. The dip of his hips to his pronounced collarbone. The way his hair fanned over your pillow like a halo. He really was an angel.

But you felt like he was teasing. Giving your just enough to keep you begging for more. You got the feeling he wasn't doing it intentionally though. No... he seemed too nice for that. But no matter if he wanted to or not it was getting frustrating to have him playing with you like this. No outcome to his torturous actions. "Angel..." You call out to the man with the plush kiss blown lips that made you wanna devour them and then kiss away softly the harshness youve ensued on them. He breathes hard at the nickname, wishing to hear it fall from your lips like a prayer anytime youd have him all to yourself. Just. Like. This. He nods, your eyes never leaving his lips as his tongue darts out the wet them. He's been doing that all day. He had to have known what he was doing. He had confessed in one of his pretty written letters that he always brought chapstick with him. You weren't sure if you were glad he forgot it or mad at him because of how much you wanted to cum. "Don't tease." What was opposed to be heard as a light instruction, came out more like begging. But, to be honest. It wasn't like you were doing anything different in your heart. You wanted noting more than to cum around his fingers. So, just as before, the desires of the heart seep though your carefully tapped up cracks.

Minghao slows his movements, no doubt making you even more mad at him. But whats in his mind now could top anything hes done with you. It's been in his mind for a while now. And, in the end, he was never that strong willed when it came to matters of you. He told your just what he was thinking. though, it terms of trying to keep this friendship a strict friendship he was doing a horrible job at it. But, just as previously stated, a thought becomes a desire, and a desire will soon become an action. But now, he remembers something else from that saying: "it will then become sin." But the thought of you on his face, your thighs suffocating him and nose buried deep in your wetness sounds like heaven to him. The exact opposite. He'd been thinking about it for too long, then for a while he'd been desiring your like that, now he was finally asking. It seemed like it took forever to get out of his mouth. Hopefully like the taste of you on his tongue, refreshing when he licks his teeth. "I need you on my face." His words left you dazed. He finally stops his movements, his fingers still deep inside of you. "Angel, what--" "I need you on my nose." He nods his head once, beckoning you higher up on him. You slide a little further up on him, his fingers coming out of you with a sound he doesn’t think he can ever forget. He doesn't know how much more of this he can take. He fucking needs you on his tongue. Lapping up whatever you give him. Its not like you don't want to. No, it's something you've dreamed about for months. But as you start to get in your head about it, your thoughts turning from excited to worry. A comforting hand runs up your back, effectively letting you know he's right there with you. For you. "We don't have to do anything you don't want to. At all," He assures you. You nod, taking a breath. "Of course i fucking want to." You slide up onto his chest a little more. Shit, he can feel you dripping onto his stomach. How the fuck can he not cum right now? How could anyone not cum when you're on them like this? "Please, I just wanna make you feel good." He whispers.

And how could you ever deny him of his request? With his voice horse like he’d been screaming and his eyes pleading. You bring yourself to his face. His arms hand limp by his sides as if he wasn’t playing with your bra strap two seconds ago. “It’s ok.” You reassure him. He nods. His hands going up to grip your hips, slowly lowering you down onto his face. His tongue already hanging out and read for you. Just like his hard dick still in the painfully tight confines of his pants. He’s so fucking warm and wet. You can barely take the sensation. He starts moving the muscle a second later, giving you no time to adjust for damn great it felt to have him on you. You’ve waited too long for this. Having to control yourself around him and his fucking beautiful face. Him and his stupid body that was so nice all you wanted to do was sit atop it and stay there. His hands and voice that always brought you back to your bed at night. Your roommate was almost never home before you so that gave you the perfect opportunity to get yourself to relax. And also at the same time make him feel just how much of a effect he had on you. You always knew he walks had to have been thin— you could practically hear every other thing the man did on the other side. You always thought that had to be a bad thing. Now you see that it could be just as good.

Even better with how beautifully he responded. Giving you a taste of how he’d sound in person. How he’d be. A melody to your ears and quite the sight to see. In fact, that was exactly what you were thinking as you leaned back, his tongue still working wonders on you just by its slow and steady small mow vents. You could tell Minghao was still just testing the waters. And you’d never dreams of rushing him. No matter how much it felt like he was everywhere you didn’t need him. First on your outer pussy lips. You crying out at his tongue slid up and down your pussy-- rubbing just hard enough in a way he learned that made you clench your fists in pleasure. Then he was dipping the muscle in your needy and clenching hole. You didn’t want to admit it but you didn’t think you ever wanted anything more than to take him in at that moment. You let your hands roam freely on his chest behind your back, stretching your muscles as you felt his soft silky skin run along your finger tips. His tongue runs up and down your folds. It was sloppy, and somehow needy like his kisses. But it still felt like heaven.

Your eyes roll into the back of your head, you can't feel his skin under your palms anymore because of how mind clouding the sensation was. Did he know was he was doing to you? His eyes were watching your face intently, searching for signs you liked whatever he was doing. He grips your hips even harder, but you didn't care about finger nail marks or bruises when he brought you even closer to his face. Now flush against him, his nose bumping your clit in a way that made your head reel. He gets to work on making your cum. It seems as if his only goal he's ever had now is to bring your to your high. It's all he can think about. Sure, his bare torso was shivering under the coolness of your ac but now it was hot as fire under your touch. He dips his tongue into your gaping hole again, liking the reaction your give him more than anything.

"Stick your tongue out?” A mix of a question and a demand, he happily obliges. You rock yourself onto him. His mouth, his lips, and his tongue. Trying to bring yourself to orgasm even faster. Your thighs locking around his head and cutting off most of his hearing. But he didn't mind. Now that he got a taste of you, he'd let you do anything to let him get it again. But why was he thinking of if he'd ever get to have his tongue buried inside your perfect pussy again when he was just getting started? hes going so fast wit you. too fast. he wants to take it slow (as if having oral sex the first time youre together for more than thirty minutes in person is slow) He wants to take it down a notch. So it doesn't end so fast. He needs you so, so fucking much. But he'll be damned if he can't take his sweet time with someone like you.

He takes charge again, running his tongue in circles around your clit. You tug in his hair to bring him closer as his warm palms slide up your back, playing with your bra strap. He brakes concentration on making little kitten licks along your clit for a second. So fucking good but torture still. He takes a brake to look into your eyes. Even fore a second. A frustrated grunt from you is what follows. "What're you doing? Keep going." You pant out. He keeps going, but no faster than before. Kitten licks turn into leisurely tasting your arousal in his mouth. Not stopping until every inch of him is coated in your slick. His lips and chin must be wet by now; he can feel your slick dripping down from his chin to his neck. it might've just been from all the teasing, but you were dripping this much for him? All for him. He thought. Running that sentence in his head no short of a hundred times and almost tasting it in his mouth. Because, wow. he was finally finally here. With you in your bed. Making you moan. He was finally the one who drew those sweet noises out of you. In the same place where he hears you almost every night. But this time it was him making you loose control of yourself and penetrating the walls with your noises. He could finally see you… and hear you in person. He was in heaven. Seeing what your face looked like when you pussy was getting played with.

Another one of your pretty moans spurred him on, quickening his pace because he thinks he'll die if he doesn't get to hear more of you right now. His tongue slides up and down your folds before getting to your clit again, making you let out a sigh of relief when the wet muscle mets your there. He can barely breath with his nose and mouth pressed so tightly up against you like this. But the wet and perfectly soft but stiff enough to make you go crazy. His fingers ghost up your legs, almost tickleing them, making your spread them wider for him. Fuck, he thought, a few mintutes in and he has already in love with your pussy. You scent, your taste. Everything. Not too far off from what he felt around you anwways. Noting new on his part. But this-- him brining you heat closer to his face so he can better lick and suck at you, that was new. But the good kind of new. A type of new that he wanted to always remain. Not something to try out once then never use again. The specail type of new that only makes you burn for more. Thats all he wanted with you-- more more more. Whateve more you were willing to give him he'd happily take.

The tip of his tongue dips inside your hole again, gaining the same reaction as last time he did so: you moaning his name out like a prayer. "Mmh," You pant, "right fucking there" Your hand that was preciously travailing down to undo the buckle on his pants stop abruptly, you, unable to move with his nose rubbing at your clit just right. He licks a long stripe up from your dripping hole, gathering all of your arousal he can on his tongue, to your clit. "You taste--" he bucks his hips up into the air when your warm fingers reach his hips, wanting noting more than to keep going. He knows he looks desperate, but in all truth he is. He really is. He just can't help himself. "Fuck, ah! You're perfect, so fucking perfect baby." He takes a break from eating your pussy so beautifully to look up at you. His dark eyes glossy and hooded, something primal and needy behind them just waiting to burst. And on other times, you would've shoved his face right back into you to get back to work. But this time all you seemed to want to do was to take in his handsome face. Just take a breath and marvel at it for a second or two. He licks his lips. His fucking perfect lips that are wet and messy and blown wider and have plumped up from all the kissing. And from how hard he had bee practically making out with your cunt a second ago.

Your juices are running down his chin but neither of you dare wipe it off. A reminder of how much he wants you, and how much you want him. You wonder how he's this worked up already. You hadn't even touched his dick. But god, did it make you feel powerful. You almost break into a laugh as he pants, one of the things, along with his heartbeat, that are in sync with yours. You don't really remember how it happened, but it did. And you for sure ain't complaining about it. You can almost hear his thoughts asking you what you're laughing about in his eyes. Then, before you can even say another word, he realizes. And in a spur of the moment decision, an act of bravery on his part, he takes your hand that was rubbing comforting circles on the back of your neck into his, making you bring your hand sliding down to his crotch up with it for comfort, he doesn't complain. "You really don't know how fucking good you taste?" He sounds surprised. Nearly addicted.

You've tasted yourself before, everyone has, right? It was definitely a distinct, flavor, but not really anything good or bad. It wasn't disgusting, wasn't delicious. You couldn't really fathom anyone loving it until Minghao. You had an inkling he had a bit of a oral fixation, you'll keep that in mind for next time, you thought. You shook your head no, and without another moments of hesitation, almost as if the world would collapse if he waited another second, he crashes his lips into yours, shoving his tongue in your mouth. He made your taste yourself on him. It still wasn't the best flavor, but something about the whole thing made you wanna cum on the spot. His tongue explored your mouth, coating you with your arousal still on his tongue. He needed you to understand how worked up you got him. How much he loved you taste. He needed it. He brakes the kiss with a whine, leaving you to chase his lips.

But still, more than anything you want him on your heated core. You want to cum. You snake your hands down to the waistband of his pants once more. "God, you're so good." He mumbles against you, the vibrations of his words that really, neither of you really knew what they meant, because, words like that could mean a millions things but also none, but damn did they sound fucking beautiful in his mouth. The vibrations that rattled your core felt so good that your had to stop yourself from sinking into him. You lean forward, your hands now planted where they were on his chest.

Your compose your self, finally, spitting into your palm a couple times. And he’s bucking into noting by the time you slide your hands down the front of his pants. He shivers when you touch his dick. He's so fucking sensitive from behind in the tight confines of his pants he thinks he'll blow any second. You start to pump him, though torturously slow. He groans again, and you pull him deeper into your pussy by his hair. Somehow it looking messed up like this makes him look even more attractive. And at the moment, you're more than done with the notion that you can't think of him like this.

"D-don't tease." He stutters out, barely being able to fucus now that you're touching him like this. He presses out another sound that makes your head reel. How, even though being as distracted as he seems, he's still able to keep a steady pace on licking you to your orgasm you don't know. The feeling of the weight of him in your hands is unmatched by any other you've felt before. By now, no more spit is needed, he's leaking out of the tip of this cock so much (the same one that you're rubbing your thumb over) to the point where he's making his own lubricant. His pre cum seeping in between your fingers and running down your hand as you pump him slowly. You could tell form the beginning that he didn't need much to cum, that he was trying not to for a while now. But you couldn't just have this time with him and not doing something of the sort, right? You'd be a fool not to take the chance and run with it. If Minghao were standing his knees would've already given out a log time ago. A muffled, "don't stop." comes in a plea from his mouth underneath you. "Wouldn't dream of it, angel." You assure him as you pump him faster. He gives a wet kiss to your clit, making your cunt even wetter and messier than before. He rubs his tongue all over your wanting slit.

You grind into his face again, chasing your orgasm. And he whimpers. A sound so delicate you wish you could bottle it up for youserlf and keep it forever. He's leaking like crazy in between your fingers, and groaning into you. His heart is racing like he'd just run for an hour. The sounds that are coming from him tonguing you are driving both of you mad. It's all just so wet and messy. But neither of you would change that for the world, liking it that way. He doesn't care that his pants are sticky and messy and that if he'd pull them back up all he'd be met with is a sopping wet patch on his on the front side of them And you don't care that your sheets are probably going to be ruined after you're done with him. At this moment in time all you two want to focus on is getting the other off. That's it. Plain and simple. His cock twitches in his pants with the next sound of ecstasy you make for him.

And he can't hold it in anymore. He squirms in your grasp, trying to keep himself focused. Senescing he was on the brink of cumming, you pump your palm around him faster, wishing your other hand could help you touch what you could not reach. You're fast and calculated, running your fingers along the length of him just right. The feeling of your hand, smooth as silk on him, is all too much to bare anymore. He shakes and quivers under your touch as he spilled into your hand. Gripping your waist so hard it feels like fire. He's sorry, he really is. Bu the needs something to hold onto while you're making him feel like it was dead and now being brought back to life. He groans into your cunt, never stopping his licking, trying to taste as much of your as he can as he cums. His voice, although muffled, lets out an unmistakable keen. He tries to still himself but the sensation is too much. You squeeze the base of his cock to ease him though his high. And his hands slide up and down your thighs. If he could he'd hold your arm in perfect place where it was. But when you kept it there anyways he felt like he wanted to give you the world. "G-god, thank you baby You're so good." His head can't stop spinning inside him as he spills his seed into your palm. "I-I" He can't speak. It's warm, and messy, and so fucking wet and it's all over your hand and fingers and you're still fucking him with your hand, not bothered by the thick liquid on you. Somehow that only turns him on even more. The wet squelching sounds picked up right back after they started, this time not from him and his desperate tongue.

"Fuck" He pants, his mouth still agape when you roll on him. Much to his dismay. If it were up to him he’d have your perched like royalty on his face for as long as he could. Your pussy blocking off his air supply as before and your thighs locked so fucking right around his head he can’t hear. Just. As. Before. And just as before he’d like to cum along with you in your bed again and again. Your soft sheets already feeling like heavenly clouds to him under his bare back. He's been dreaming of this, writhing in his sleep and waking up annoyed at himself, and at the situation of you not being there when he opens his eyes. He's been dreaming about you touching his cock again and again. Ever since you started letting him hear you at night by yourself, in your bed, fingers doing what you had secretly wanted him to do all this time.

He'd been imagining your moans-- the ones that he'd hear spill from your lips like fine honeyed tea, that he was the one causing you to sound like that and imagining himself just like how he was with you here: you on his face and his sensitive throbbing cock in your palm. He'd imagined himself making you cum and you squeezing the fucking life out of him in return. Making you cum... making your express beautiful sounds because of him and making you feel good. That was another thing on his mind lately. He stopped trying to make it go away, too. Opting to excuse himself from whatever he was doing and running for the nearest bathroom before anyone could see the tent in his pants. Sometimes forgetting to lock the bathroom stall in his rush to relive the tightness in his pants. It's all he can think about. Ever. Your cum on his tongue. What face you'd make. He already heard the sounds. And oh, did he want to hear more of them. The mere thought of it filled him with a sense of renewed vigor.

He spits on your clit, making the whole thing ever slipperier. Allowing him to glide his tongue up and down you even easier. Coaxing another moan out of you. You want to cum right then and there. He's giving you all you need. Everything you ever needed. The extra pressure on you that he's applying makes you wonder if one of those letters you couldnt send got to him about what you liked. he truth was, that, somehow got throughout the haze of pre orgasm bliss you were giving him, each pump of your hand making him more and more hopeful of the pending high that was to come. And sorted through what made you make the most noise. He wants you to feel good. If he just felt that good from just your hand then whatever he's doing must not be enough. He wonders if he's being selfish for a moment, but then you throw head back as your grind into his face, barely any noise of pleasure coming out because of how good it was all feeling. How good he was for you. And he knew he was on the right track.

"Please, I need it." He groans. Sounding more like a beg than he wanted to. "You feel so god." You wonder how he can reduce you to a whisper just from his tongue alone. One things for sure, you didn't wanna stop. "I-" Your shaky voice surprises even you,, "Right there, minghao!" You grip his hair a little tighter. HE can tell that you're close. Though you sounded even better in person when you were about to cum. This time on the flat of his tongue. "Go ahead," You hear from him, "Please baby. Cum on my tongue." Your high comes when your gazes meet-- fiery and sharp with pierced lust, but also wanting and soft enough to look at and just melt. Melt away everything. Strip away anything that was hindering you from feeling this way on him. Because of him. You moan and groan on top of him, not knowing where to look as his tongue works on you still through your orgasm. Never once stopping, wanting noting more than to collect your arousal on his waiting tongue. The pleasure he's still making your feel-- even as the final shock weaves of you still runs through you. Feeling like you body was being pushed and pulled from him and his torturous tongue moving against you. Because of him and what he's done for you.

He finally stops when you literally have no more to give him. But you still feel so fucking wet, dripping, even. Granted, some of the slick was Minghaos saliva coating your folds. But, for once you're spent. Not able to even hold yourself up. You'd talked a big game before this. Before he sunk the first kiss into your neck and ran his tongue up your pussy. You hadn't known how needy you could be until you saw his torso naked and felt the weight of him in your hand. you certainly hadn't expected for him to take so much out of you. But it was a good kind of tired. Not the kind where you wish fore more to be done but you can't give any (though, in all honesty, you wouldn't mind feeling him on you like this a second time.) Not the type of tired where your muscles ached and you felt like collapsing. But all you wanted to do was to fold into him. You felt tired, but no short of satisfied. When it was just you at night. Just you and your fingers and him on the other side of the wall. You could go on for awhile. Wanting, needing him to hear you. You never wanted to stop until you feel asleep. But with him under you like this... you couldn't quite explain it, but you were satisfied with staying close to him for a moment. And you did-- giving you two a minute to recuperate. Somehow it didn't feel forced. Sure, you were at the edge of your seat to continue with him, but you felt nice. Just taking a minute with him.

He guides you down onto his chest, his hand on your back. Warmth fills you like never before. Starting at the middle of your spine where his palm rested like an anchor, and springing forth to your neck and down you legs. Your hand drags itself away from his stomach and glides up his neck to his handsome face. Your head seems to fit perfectly in the crook of his neck. His mind starts to reel with all the possibilities of what could happen next. Who could say something next. What would you say, if anything? Or would you just lead him out your door? What would he say? But most of all, he thought of how it would be if you'd ever do this again. Maybe going further the next time. He'd die a happy man tasting you, but he still yearns to feel you. How he longs to be inside you.

But, for now. He was perfectly happy with just staying like how you two were-- his arms encircling your back and yours flat on his chest. He wants to stay like this. Not just until the both of you have recovered from your orgasms, but he wants to have you like this again and again and make you let out those beautiful noises until your throat is dry and your fingers are sore from gripping onto the sheets and his hair. He sighs contently. "Don't get too sleepy. We're not done yet."

His thoughts of fucking you again had to fall away, along with the taste of you fresh on his tongue. Something he wanted more and more every day, but something he was son beginning to realize he wasn't going to get, having to settle for the memory of it instead, fisting his cock to it-- and the sounds of your fucking moans. Unlike before though, it wasn't just a far away dream that floated to him whenever he heard you on the other side of his wall. IT was something that was a reality for him. Maybe just for a moment. But it was real and it happened. And now that his desire became a reality... all he could think about was how he wanted to feel you on him once more. Now that he got a taste he doesn't know how he survived without you for so long. God, he was so stupid not to have been having you in bed sooner. It was his new favorite thing. never leaving his mind like a good song he'd never get tired of. Now that it was real inside his mind, something that actually happened instead of a hazy image in his mind for him to dream about, he spun constantly with the thought of you. Over and over, never stopping as a thread in his stream of consciousness,. When he goes next door to his apartment later that day, all giddy and closing the door behind him and sliding against it like a person in a romance movie, he thought he'd never experience a better feeling. That was until, even though, just like the sounds you made for each other remained in the others apartment and never talked about, never mentioned until behind separate closed doors, you'd hadnt ended up on top of him or him in your bed like before... that was until you had come over after one of his letters had said something about him going on a date.

He didn't want to, really. But it had been nearly a month and, to his surprise one of his co workers had asked him out and well-- the truth was he did want to turn them down. HE really did. But they were always to nice to him. And besides, you had talked about setting him up with one of your friends. And as both options felt horrible to him, he'd rather not break the news to your own personal friend that he was never going to lust, and find attractive, and want to go out with anyone but you. He'd rather your friend not have to tell you that. He wanted you to be happy with your decision to set him up, and that if you did he wanted it to work out well. And that was why it couldn’t work: even while thinking of being set up with another person he couldn’t dare think of what that person might like about him, hoping they wouldn't be disappointed by him. But he could only think of how you'd feel if something you'd been working hard to set you failed.

This one, (and very much casual sounding by the look of it) date with his co worker didn't have to mean much right? No strings attached, no commitments. He liked the coffee shop they had suggested, and half prince anything sounded good to him. But here you were, in his bedroom. The same place where he had made that dreaded wifi name. The same name that he had tried to change when he go home from your place a couple days ago, and had been trying since. But whatever he did was to to avail. He was glad beyond compare that you hadn't asked for his wifi passcode. At this point he wouldn't even know what to say to cover it up. And it wasn't like this was something containable, either. He'd heard other tenants laugh about the name, agreeing if they were on the same floor or directly bellow you. What he spread about you? He felt like it was wrong more than anything else now. No longer filled with that sense of "what the fuck am i gonna do if they find out?" But now, his worries become background noise as you stand with your back turned to him, rifling through his closet on a mission to find him some "more self respecting clothes than what You described." Or, at least thats, what you told him in the last letter you taped to his door this morning.

He can barely focus when your gorgeous back, the same one he ran his fingers up and down not many nights ago, is turned to him? And how could he focus with well, all of you standing right before him? Trying to help him. Being so lovely and wonderful. True, just like you have always been with him. At least in his eyes. And all for no good reason anyways, because in all honestly he doesn't even like the person much at all. But, given how much time as passed before youve even brough the time you've spent together up. And how the wall is still separating you, maybe this'll help him to stop hanging onto to you. Even if it doesn't go anywhere, because, he's kind of hoping it doesn.t But still, maybe getting a so called taste of someone else to will bring down his want for you. You noticed something is up with your friend when he hasn't responded for a good couple minutes. You wave your hand in front of his face to get his attention. "Hello! Welcome back to the land of the living." You elongate the ends of your first at last words, hoping to make him smile.

For you? Always. Anytime

He rubs a hand over his face then through his hair, messing it up in the process. Did he really not know how much of an effect he was having-- pulling all this shit on you? "I sure don't feel it." He groans. God, it sends a shiver up your back. 95% Percent of it because your friend is sad, the other five percent he well, you hadn't heard his groans in nearly a month and fuck, you wanted to hear them like that again. You shake the memories from you mind as you place another shirt on his dresser into the "yes" pile, coming over to him. He's splayed out on the bed. A sight to see, really. Using his arm as a pillow and a blanket thrown over half of him, at this point mostly just bunching it up and laying on it. "Whats wrong?" you say in a sign songy voice, trying to make light of the situation. He chuckles, thinking you sound way too much like a mother with your eyebrow raised for your own good right now. "Jus' thinking about about why we've already spent thirty minutes on this. I leave in an hour and a half." Because i need more time with you before you go. "NO, really, what's going on in that pretty little head?"

He shrugs, trying to stay nonchalant. It didn't work on you though. He huffs like a child, rolling his eyes like a brat, flopping into his bed. "Just scared about the date." He says, keeping it simple. And yes, he wasn't lying at all. But he definitely wasn't stressed for the reasons he wanted you to think he was. You scoot a little closer to him. God, any closer and you'd practically be sitting on his lap. No, no. He seriously needed to stop before his thoughts became out of hand. Though, he wondered if it was too late for that. He wanted you to think he was beyond excited for the date-- that, other than his outfit he'd been thinking of it for days and couldn't wait. Now, he was thinking of taking the long way and claiming that he fell asleep or forgot his phone or something. But as stressed out as he was about this, he couldn't be an ass about it. So, he was going to try and make it on time. He didn't want to make his co worker think he didn't care about them. Cause he certainly did... like youd care for a cup of coffee so as to not spill it. But you? He cared for you like his own body. Unfortunately, you didn't fall for his see though crystal lies. "Well, yeah, I knew you were scared. But are you sure you should be?" He looked at you in question, fearing he might've just blown his cover, "Shouldn't you be nervous? Maybe even stressed out. Hell I know I would be, you've shown me their picture." You chuckle, he smiles. His eyes shine with glee like they always do when he smiles. Just like his eyes shone as you lay in bed together in peace. His chin on your head made you never want to leave his arms. You playfully nudge him. "As cute as they are..." You dip your head around to meet his gaze. You're leaning down and around and its an awkward looking position but you don't care.

"Really, Minghao, what's the matter?" "I wanna go on this date; I promise--" "Nobody said anything about you not wanting to go?" You say, your eyebrows raised in expectantly as if to tell him, you're not getting away from this question this easily. The truth was, you didn't really want him to go. You'd much rather have the rest of him in bed with you. But up until now you were going to suck it up because it seemed like he was happy about it. Now it seemed he didn't want to go either. "I'm just--" He sighs, running a hand through his hair just for it to go straight back into place, "What if I'm not into them?" He thinks it best to just tell you. I mean, what's the harm? A lot of people aren't into other people. Maybe now, as much as he didn't want you to have to, maybe you could help him come up with an excuse. Maybe you'd just have to give him one. "Sorry, I can't come because my next door neighbor said they're gonna fuck me lmao catch ya later ttyl" You know, better than that. Thats what he wants. Fuck more than anything. Thats why he'd doing this--- not only because youre his friend and he needs someone to unload that heavy feeling he's got onto someone, but also to give you an opening to hand him an excuse to stay. "What if?" You repeat. In a tone that said: tsk, either you do or you don't. "You're right" He sits up as if this just hit him. "I'm not into them. Like, at all." "Isn't that how it's supposed to work when you first start to 'get to know somebody'?" You ask, head tilted like a puppy. He thinks its the cutest thigh he's ever seen. "Yeah, yeah. You go out with them because you like how they've talked to you, three times and the very vague vibe and because they're cute, then you start to be 'into them', into them." He says. "Hao," He perks up at the name, "Looks like you're not too shocked by what I said. You already knew this, or?" You let your sentence trail off for him to answer. Damn you and you being close enough with him to pick up what he was feeling. It was really barely turning out to be in his favor.

"Maybe i wanna do something different with my time." He says, voice low and sultry, looking no where but your soft lips that seemed to be begging and calling for him, inviting him in with ease. "Yeah?" You ask, your voice for once not taunting but rather as soft and whispering--- only for the two of you to hear, no wall in between, "And what might that be?" He answers you with a kiss-- soft as his lips, it is. Sucking on you bottom lips so gently you can't help but moan into his mouth. His teeth grazing it so lightly it almost feels like tickling. Soothing and calming as you press yourself closer to him, hand reaching over to rest on his hip bone. spreading warmth and rubbing where you had previously squeezed nearly a month before. The two piles are messy and unruly on his desk and you had planned on picking them up by now but right now you couldn't care less. Noting else on you mind besides his lips and how needy you felt because of them. Because of him. You pull away, just for a second, to look at him. He's beautiful. Handsome beyond belief, really.

And it doesn’t take but a minute to get him hard against you, tent in his pants pressed on you just as before. Without a second thought you push him further into the bed and he pulls his shirt over his head. You scan his body. And your core throbs with need when you see him. His mouth hangs agape as you rub his skin as sensitive nipples. He bucks up into you in search of some sort of friction. It probably wasn’t the best idea to be doing this. He has a date, for fucks sake. And here he was getting his neck kissed by you. But right now, you didn’t really want to think about that. More concerned with getting his lips on yours again. He whines as he tilts his head into the pillows, giving you more access to his neck. “God, you’re like a dog in heat.” You whisper against his skin. He chuckles and runs his hands down, down, and down until finally stopping at our ass. Resting his hands there. You start kissing down his soft body. He’s so lost in the feeling of you that he doesn’t think to control the endless stream of consciousness running out his brain like water out a open tap. “I’m sorry. I’m so so so sorry” he whisperers, words barely heard over pants and little groans he can’t help but let out. He wants you to know how good you make him feel. Couldn’t be anyone else.

“whatre you sorry for, pretty boy?”

You raise your head a little to meet his eyes, belt discarded on the floor along with this pants. He doesn’t look like he wants for answer. And you know, as hard as he is, he isn’t that close. You stop all movements of kisses and hickys on his thighs that nearly shake with want for you to go where he needs you. He tugs you up closer to his face but your shirt, the same shirt that a second later he’s pushing up so he can kiss you tummy and waistline. And as good as his lips on your hipbones feel, you can tell there’s something wrong. You move his hand away from your shirt pushed up to your bra. He looks up at you. This time with more that just lust in his eyes. And that worries you. He seems scared, begging. Not for you to touch him, though. “What’s wrong? Are you feeling—“ you cut him off. “No, but I think you’re feeling some type of way and you’re not telling me.” You start to worry that he’s having second thought about this. I mean, he was supposed be getting ready for someone else. He turns his head away. “It doesn’t really matter.” He says. You scoff. “You’re a bad liar. Now tell me.” You speak softly, thinking it may be something you did. After a second, he realizes that he needs to speak what’s on his mind. It wasn’t going to do either of you any good if he just stayed quiet about it. “Please don’t be mad…” he says quickly. You raise an eyebrow at him-- quite the funny sight if he wasn't a little scared.

you move a little bit off of him, still staying close to give him room to breath, straightening out your shirt. “But it was me.” You looked confused. God why did you have to look to cute when you’re confused. It was really messing his apology speech up. “I’m sorry but it was be who made that Wi-Fi you’re always talking about. It tried— you won’t believe how much I tired to get it off but it won’t let me.” His constant rambling turns into background noise for you. He was the one who did that? All this time he was the one who made you worried that you might get evicted because of noise complaints? “Now, I didn’t completely mean it in a bad way! It’s just, well, i-I hear you?” Why was that a question? Either he did hear you and he liked it like how you wanted, or all this time he’d been putting on headphones and canceling your noise for him out. Shit. Did this have anything to do with our nice he was to you? You felt like you were dreaming. Was the serious? He couldn't have, right? I mean, it wasn't like you were particularly hurt, contrary to popular belief because the guy was still rambling on in front of you. You had to grasp his arm tightly to get him to stop. "huh?" He wonders aloud. "Listen, I have no fucking idea why you'd do that, but I don't hate you for it." You start to laugh,

"In fact, it's even kinda funny." His eyes are questioning, inquisitive, wondering if you really mean what you say. "I was pretty drunk... Not like thats an excuse." He said, still sensing how you must've still felt a little miffed. "I think its my time to ask you whats the matter." He puts a hand on your thigh, trying and succeeding in being comforting to you, when a not so comforting silence falls over the two of you. "...None of this was for some sort of compensation, right?" You ask, feeling your stomach sink, not with the anticipation of what would come after his feverish kisses to your hot skin, but now because... what if he couldn't answer that? What if it took him a minute? That was how you'd know this whole thing wasn't a rooze-- a plan to make you think that it wasn't him. In your heart you knew he wouldn't. As little as youve known him and as much as he was a drama queen, Minghao couldn't do something like that. Not to you, not to anybody.

Y/N!" He genuinely sounded hurt by the even mere suggestion. Then, realizing that, well, he didn't have the right words at the time and that, even if he did words alone might not do much. He gets up with a rush. "Wait, here." He nearly runs out the door, almost forgetting his shirt. "Hao--" You chuckle. Why does he seem so excited ? You wonder. But, just like with everything, he was a wonder. He peeks his head back into the room, reaching for his clothes with a shy smile up at you. His whole face seems to brighten. The last thing you hear is the faint clicking of his belt as he hurries out the bedroom door. He rushes back in the same way he came. But now holding a letter. "I wanted to give you this earlier. But this seems like a better time than anything." He explained, "with the date and everything... I just figured it would look stupid." You open the letter and start to read, it looked half finished. But the paragraph inside tells you all you need to know. In synopsis: he views as someone very special in his life. He cherishes you to the ends of the earth. And with what he's written down, it only solidifies how he'd never do anything to hurt you. Your head starts to turn up before you're even done reading. "Listen I was never that concerned--" "Just like old times--" you both say at the same time. "Sorry, I've been thinking about saying that since I started writing it." He mentions. "I thought so." You said. God, how do I know you so well. He knows he's written something else, but he also know sees you haven't read it yet. He doesn;t say anything, though, preferring to leave you to find it on your own when you're ready. He gestures to you like; and you were saying? "Hao," A feel good shiver runs up his spine at the nickname, "I never was that concerned with it. Sure, it stung a little to know that someone complaining about my apartment." He starts to say something, but you cut him off.

"And I know you're sorry. And I've heard horror stories about your wifi provider before." He smiles at you, beath calming down, not sounding like he's run a race as a second ago. He looks unreal. Other worldly, even. So fucking beautiful. You can't think of another word to describe him. Every single one you've tried seems to be a little off. You werent expecting such an actual explanation. And he didnt just leave it at: "Well, I was drunk so you can't blame me." His actually made sense, too. And, from his track record, and even from today. You could tell he was telling you the truth. One look into those deep brown eyes and you knew that if he had the power to he wouldve long changed it. And if he wasn't drunk he wouldn't have made it. "But there's one thing I don't know... I knew you were drunk, but, anything you'd like to tell me that spurred this on?" You sit there, pulling his body towards yours, starting to fiddle with the hem of his shirt. It was on backwards. He shivers as your fingers graze his heaving stomach. "Yeah." HE says simply, "But not how you think!" You chuckle. "What?" You question, "You don't mind the loud music? So... is there, anything else?" You say it like there could be anything in the world that caused him to make a jab at how "loud your apartment is." "Your noise." HE looks into your eyes, referencing how you'd make yourself cum every night. So close but way to far away from him. He wanted to start rambling about how he doesn't mean tot hear it... but, it looked like, but your smirk you wanted him to. You wanted him to get riled up and desperate for hearing you in person. And thats just what he was. "I'm glad you've finally said something about that. Looks like I've accomplished what I wanted for the year." You breath out a laugh.

So he has unsent letters just like you? You think back to your drawer of your nightstand or the shoebox by your desk. There lay, dormant and gathering dust, all unsent letters. Letter deemed a little too early in the friendship to send, letters describing dreams or thoughts youve had of him where he's been gripping your hips as you rock on hid dick, him begging you for release as you chase your own orgasm, even one letter asking him a stupid question about some show you bother watched, you remembered the answer soon after and diced to start a new one on a fresh sheet on paper. But you still kept it and held onto it like it was a precious gem. Your fingers stop their teasing movements the waistline of his pants and tell him to wait there, same thing he told you. You come back with letters, you more than him. His eyes tell you he's interested. But also: "hold on, you too?" He reads them and smile each time he turns to another. Making little remarks and comments here and there. "You know, there's something else in mine as well." He says, flipping to one of the last ones-- the ones with detail after detail of your conscious when it came to him. About how you wanted to have him and what you wanted him to do to you in your bed. Or his, it didn't really matter as long as it was with you. "Fine. Read the rest of mine though." You say, wanting, no, needing him to know what you thought of him when he wasn't beside you. You eyes flicker down to the arrow to the font of the letter in your lap. You flip it around to see his number, clear as day, staring at you in your face. (With a little note that says: how come we never did this before?) and a little, delicate sketch of the first flower pressing he'd ever given to you whine you mentioned something about them neither of you can really remember. You pressed the note onto your thighs, smoothing it down.

"You know i never minded when you sent me pressings, right?" There was noting to make you think he was about to ask, but something told you it was in the back of his mind. He nods, barely listening as he read the letter about the dream you had about fucking him like both of your lives depend on it.

And with the growing need on your pants it sure felt like it did.-- You call his name a couple times but to no avail. “come back down to earth, angel. I’m not done with you yet” you climb back onto his lap

A second later his lips are on yours. "Fuck," He whines, "You really wanna do all that to me?" He doesn’t sound repulsed at all, he now craves the thought, desire pools in his stomach for him to feel you. All of you. Wrapped around him, bouncing on his cock like how you described. He leans on top of you, making you push down into his plush bed, his mouth more eager than the first two times. You didn't; think that was even possible. You pull away, him left chasing the feeling of your lips on his. It felt so god he'd be happy if he died there. "Call them to cancel?" You beam. A moment after he sends them a quick apologetic text, here he is, grinding into your thighs, trying to fuck himself on the pillowy flesh you so lovingly provide for him. “what is it angel? You wanna be inside me?” You ask him, smiling to yourself as he nods, gulping. Your lips are ghosting over his as you slide down on him. His fingers are inside of you and making you cum in an instant when you drop your pants. Curling and pumping just how you said he did so in your dream. And the instant his cock has sprung out of his pants, ready and waiting for you, you're starting to move in a way that makes you feel like heaven is in your grasp as he swallows your moans with a kiss.

“G-god I—“ his words are cut short as he bucks his hips up into you. The stretch you feel inside your cunt feels fucking amazing. Noting like ever before. lips hovering against his once more as you start slow movements on him, the force of them still making you move from his mouth to his eyes. Slower, now but deep as ever. HE runs his hand up your back, his brain too foggy to think to take off your shirt fully like his-- to match him, fully naked in his bed. It's something he's been dreaming about ever since he first heard you moaning from the wall behind him. even though the condom he can feel every inch of you. You’re so warm and wet and so fucking tight and slippery-- the way he glides in and out of you, always drawing pleasured sounds from the both of you drives him so crazy he can barely take his eyes off of his cock disappearing into your pretty pussy over and over again. fascinated by how a ring of your slick starts to form around his cock, sticky and thick. He wants noting more than to see you lick it off of him. Or for him to get a taste. You fuck yourself on him, not like he wants anything else. He rubs circles on your back, your thighs bare as he grips onto them to ground himself. Your hands fault against his chest for leverage, you seem to never tire of the delicious feeling of him. "What're you sorry for?" You ask him, leaning down to his earlobe and nibbling it. Almost as a reminder of how stupid it all is, you chuckle at his inability to speak when you squeeze his cock particularly tight.

The thought had long done turned into a desire, and you couldn’t have imagined a better action for you two to take.

End~

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[jello-bbq]

Accidents

(Platonic! Tsu'tey x Avatar! Reader) (Platonic! Jake x Avatar! Reader)

<Unlikely friendships, unlikely opportunities, unlikely accidents.>

(2.6 k)

Injuries and near death experiences. Timeskip because I cannot write slowburn. Angst coming up next I think.

They had no idea what to do. What could they do?

Jake and Neytiri were having lessons somewhere in the tree. The only two people they could safely interact with. Technically, a third, awkward option presented itself.

After the healer's tent, he followed them out. And continued following them as they walked around to pass the time. Which they thought completely unnecessary. But still, they could understand the need to hover. To make sure they wouldn't cause trouble around the people.

People still steered their children away when they came close, so they tried their best to keep off the main pathways.

They looked back and surely, there he was, walking a few feet away.

They pressed the cloth to their nose again, finding that the blood had lessened considerably. They would have to thank Zeyko the next time they saw her, which would definitely be soon.

After a few minutes, Tsu'tey caught up with them, silently holding out a yellow fruit.

The two ate as they walked to no place in particular. At least to them. Tsu'tey began to steer them somewhere. They didn't question it, though a part of their mind rang alarm bells and yelled 'now he's gonna kill you!'

Having been wrong three times, they could give him the benefit of the doubt.

Neither spoke as they veered off the paths. The branches looked visibly less managed than the pathways, with tall ferns getting thicker and thicker as they went.

They had to admit, it would have been a good place to die.

He took the lead when the branches became too narrow for them to walk side by side. Every now and then he would glance back as if to confirm they were still there.

His glances were hardly noticed. The ferns kept their attention.

They kept looking around, marveling at the multi-colored plants and wondering how everything looked at night. They would find out soon, realizing that eclipse had begun.

They stopped, mesmerized, forgetting that Tsu'tey seemed to be leading them somewhere. He stopped, realizing they were no longer following.

They didn't even realize he had come back and sat down beside their legs until he spoke.

"It is beautiful."

Their brows furrowed. One unusual display of care after another. Nevertheless, they took a seat on the branch, a safe distance away.

"It is."

The two sat at the edge, feet dangling, watching the sky together. Blue gave way to orange. Orange caressed pink. The sun sank over the moon's horizon and the forest lit up, replacing one beauty for another.

Tommy would've loved this, they thought. He hadn't quite left their mind since morning.

A few minutes after dark Tsu'tey led them to dinner.

"What's with the bandages?" Jake sat next to them, keen on making small talk after spending the day apart.

They, who had been dissecting the Tsu'tey thing, thinking about Tommy, and whose brain had been on Na'vi mode the whole day, did not understand his question.

"What?"

He pointed to their fingers. "That. You hurt yourself?"

"On the bow, yeah." They answered. "Ripped my skin open." They stretched their fingers, letting Jake take their hand and examine it.

"Gotta be more careful with that, kid. Don't wanna be making too many trips to the healers."

"Says the guy who has bruises all over. I'm surprised you aren't wrapped in a giant band-aid."

"Nah, the healer said it'd cover my handsome face. Would hurt all the ladies." He didn't let go of their fingers, fiddling with the ends of the bandages.

"Oh please, white boy. She did not say that." They leaned against him, starting to feel the effects of the bow training and blood loss. "I'm sure Zeyko would have smacked you for having so many bruises."

"You know the healer's name?"

They shrugged. "She told me."

Jake chuckled, noting their sudden lethargy. "Look at you making friends so quickly."

"Haven't you noticed Tsu'tey and me? We're practically besties." They murmured, lacking that usual bite.

He didn't need to ask what was wrong. They hadn't held back on telling him much after they landed on Pandora. But he asked anyway. "You missing him?"

"Yeah, just-" They motioned vaguely.

"I know, kid." Jake sighed. "He would've loved it here."

"Would have had to drag him out of the forest by his tail."

The two laughed quietly.

Neytiri and Tsu'tey seemed to notice the sudden drop in mood and their empty bowls. Some people began to retire for the night, and they made to do the same.

They followed, talking with Jake in whispers. He immediately took the empty hammock beside Neytiri again, bidding them goodnight as they moved farther away to their usual spot and laid down.

To their surprise, someone moved into the hammock beside them. With the dim light of the moss, they could barely make out the person's features.

"Sleeping alone is not good for your health."

"Zeyko?"

"You have much to live for. I can feel it. Eywa wills it."

They laughed bitterly. "I'm surprised I'm not dead yet."

They waited for something else, something to clarify her words. But only light snoring came.

They resisted the urge to sigh. Eywa wills it. Had she willed for Tommy to die?

They laid back and closed their eyes, opening them again to be faced with the pod's gel-like inside. The lid opened. Grace greeted them with a smile and an unspoken question.

"I had bow training today." They lifted their hand to show the bandages, only to remember that they couldn't. They shook their head. "Ripped my fingers open."

"Geez, keep the bloodshed to a minimum. You're already bleeding too much as it is." She knelt down to pull the tampon from their nose.

"That was very uncomfortable." They scrunched and unscrunched their nose. "But better than choking on my own blood."

Grace laughed. "Dinner and then bed, kiddo."

"Yes mum," they joked quietly, standing up and making their way to the canteen.

Switching bodies always felt weird. Two bodies. Two wildly different environments. One consciousness. At least both bodies had the same amount of limbs, excluding the tail.

As they walked the halls they could almost feel it swishing behind them except of course it wasn't. The scientists had come up with a name for it. Phantom Tail Syndrome.

Only one person sat in the canteen, a tray opposite him.

They smiled. "Thought you would have talked to Neytiri for a while."

Jake smiled back at them, straightening up at their voice. "Thought you'd be earlier." He motioned to the tray. "Food's getting cold."

They took a spoon. "I'm taking your yogurt."

"I'm taking your jerky."

°•°••°•°••°•°••°•°

The days faded into weeks. Weeks passed into months.

Their days had a set routine now. Wake up, eat breakfast, get in the pod. Eat breakfast again. Go early hunting with Tsu'tey.

Archery lessons. Lunch. Direhorse riding. Practice for the upcoming possible iknimaya. Get back to hometree in time to watch the eclipse with Tsu'tey. Dinner. Sleep.

Wake up in the link pod, eat dinner again. Go to bed.

Jake had much of the same schedule. Though his early mornings held Na'vi lessons instead of hunting.

The people had slowly become less high-strung around them. A kid named Li'yek had begun looking for them before they slept, asking them questions about earth.

Zeyko still slept on the hammock beside them, never elaborating on her words but instead commenting on whatever new injury they'd acquired that day.

On one particular day, they thought it would follow the same routine.

"What's for breakfast today?" They caught the yellow fruit thrown their way. "Oh."

"Oh?" Tsu'tey mocked, going back to sharpening his arrows for the morning hunt.

"You have no originality." They referred to his mocking and to the yellow fruit which, while tasty they had been having for breakfast for weeks now.

He shook his head slightly, ever too refined to just roll his eyes. They took a seat beside him and bit into the fruit.

"There is some dried meat in my pouch." He nodded over to the leather satchel hanging from a branch.

They grinned, finishing off the last of the yellow fruit and getting up to fish the meat out of the pouch. "What are we hunting today?"

"We are not hunting today."

"What?" They offered him the net of dried meat. He took a piece and bit on it before going back to sharpening again. "Someone else is? When's the last time you weren't on morning hunting duty?"

"A while."

They ate half the meat before tucking it back into the pouch. "Can I go back to sleep then?"

"No, ready the direhorses."

"But," they paused, "I thought we weren't hunting today?"

"We are not." He held up an arrow, watching it glint in the light. They realized it had different markings than his usual arrows. "You are."

"But- huh?" That would mean taking a clean kill. And a clean kill meant the start of iknimaya. "Jake isn't getting a clean kill yet."

"Mo'at has decided it will be you who goes first." He looked at them and smiled softly. "You are ready. Now go get the direhorses."

They were ready. That's what they kept telling themselves as they walked through the branches without noise. A herd of hexapedes below them.

Tsu'tey stood beside them, holding his spear. Before the two reached the forest, they had asked him why he needed it.

"To protect you should something try to kill you. Or to kill you out of mercy should you manage to get the neurotoxin into your blood."

They had rolled their eyes at that, shoving him as he laughed.

He couldn't laugh now. He looked completely serious, letting them do it completely on their own.

They pulled the string all the way back, breathing evenly. Out of the corner of their eyes, they saw him nod, approving of their stance. They took a breath, reminding themselves not to close one eye.

The hexapedes grazed, unknowing. Their gaze fell upon all of them, choosing the biggest one to feed the people. Another breath. They let go.

The arrow flew and hit true. The hexapedes scattered, leaving behind the dead.

They jumped down, whispering prayers as they pulled out the arrow.

They had done it.

A hand touched their shoulder. "You are truly ready."

They carried the hexapede with his help, strapping it onto their direhorse.

"Do you think you can climb the mountains? If you fall I will not catch you," he joked, getting onto his direhorse.

As they went to reply, they felt it more than heard it or saw it. Instinct, if you will.

The leaves moved. They hit the direhorses, causing them to run off quickly. A palulukan pounced, aiming for where Tsu'tey had been mere milliseconds ago.

They reached for their bow only to have a chilling realization. It was on their horse.

The palulukan grunted, turning to growl at them as if accusing them of costing it its meal. And then it pounced again.

The force hit them like a truck. They were pinned between the palulukan and the ground. Stones dug into their back.

If they cried out, they wouldn't know. The pain coursed through them blindingly. They could almost hear bones snapping. For a second they thought they passed out.

The palulukan moved above them. When they looked up, its teeth were right above. It's jaw on their chest.

There was no time to think. They wrapped their arms and legs around its mouth, holding it shut. It did not like that, bucking and shaking, almost succeeding in throwing them off. Their face got dangerously close to the opening of its jaw and they leaned back, head hitting the ground.

A glint in the grass caught their eye. Their arms hurt. Their legs were conceding to the sheer power of the palulukan's jaw.

They reached out blindly, skin scraping on stones. Tears clouded their eyes. Warm breath pushed against their skin. Saliva dribbled down and loosened their hold.

Their hand hit more rocks. The palulukan jumped around wildly, realizing as well that their death was imminent.

They kept readjusting, trying not to fall. The saliva made it hard to get a grip. The breath made them want to barf.

This was it, they would die.

And then their hand hit solid wood, grasping for it blindly. The familiar carving had them crying even more.

They let their other hand slip, relying on their legs to keep its mouth closed. And then they drove the arrow into the middle of its jaw.

It cried out and faltered. Their grip slipped and they hit the forest floor with a force that drove the air from their lungs.

The pain had gone numb, at least. Another product of their experimentation.

The palulukan struggled, crying out. They watched as its movements became sluggish, whining in pain. They stood easily. As if they didn't have any injuries at all.

They took another arrow, trying to even their breathing as they approached it. "I'm sorry." The arrow plunged into its head and it went still.

A small spray of blood reached them, splattering across their front.

A prayer for its life floated into the air, uttered with the barest amount of shock.

When it fell they cried, body shaking, and the urge to lay down and wait for help grew strong. Something felt off to them, knowing that the experiments robbed them of feeling anything in the midst of such situations.

This didn't seem to be the case with them kneeling on the grass, shaking uncontrollably and throwing up fruit and meat until they heard a cry that wasn't their own.

Their body froze, every emotion finally slinking away as it had been trained to do.

They picked the remaining arrows off of the ground and ran.

The cry rang out again and they almost tripped upon the realization that it was Tsu'tey.

They saw a blur of black through the trees and their blood ran cold. Another palulukan. Why?

It jumped at a tree, and they could just barely make out Tsu'tey stabbing at it with his spear.

They ran forward to help.

The palulukan jumped higher, nearly grazing Tsu'tey, and when he stepped back nothing could support his weight but leaves.

They ran faster when he fell and it turned to pounce on him. They pounced first. Jumping onto its back, bunching all of the arrows together, and bringing them down.

Blood splattered on them again. Coating them almost wholly this time. But they had no time to care or cry. They stumbled over to Tsu'tey, muttering another prayer.

They examined him. He wasn't hurt, but he wasn't awake. His head had hit a log.

They cried out for the horses, only one appeared.

His weight didn't hurt. Even though they could hear their bones straining, it didn't hurt. It couldn't hurt. They hauled him up onto the direhorse, easily ignoring how their arms shook.

They followed behind him, climbing onto the horse and urging it forward. They could feel the horse's worry through the bond, no doubt heightened by whatever pain their body currently ignored.

The forest at that time of morning could be easily navigated and they would have thanked Eywa for it if they still had control over their thoughts.

Their brain started to shut down. The numbness intensified. Somehow, they spotted a guard in the trees and called out. Or at least they think they did.

The guard turned, and they had time to register the panic in his eyes before the world tilted.

[blackbloodteeth]

Snippet Sunday!!!! I'm so excited that I'm almost done with The WIP™, so look forward to that as much as I am (if brain is merciful and doesn't make me too inspired to write another scene afterwards).

And here's my contribution to this here Sunday! Better strap in 'cause we're gettin' weird with it (also warning for like vomiting or something).

———

Everything happened so fast and all at once, quite literally so as moments flipped by like television static in quick succession as Maka spins Soul around in a dance, and his fingers grip through her hair as she presses his face deeper into the couch, and the edge of the blade tips the rapid pulse of his neck towards the glare gleaming down on him, and oh god make it stop- while the cards across the table grin with his face – "Devil's bluff." – until his knees crash against the concrete below, his chest heaving and then spewing out something wretched and- sl-slug…?

"Oh there you are, it's about time. Or is it about space?" Soul's head shivers up to crane his head towards- at himself? But like one of those freaky animatronics you'd find on a show stage except it's standing all on its own, not laughing with its mouth as it jumps to another pose like he'd been forced to blink. "Either way, no matter where you go, here you are!"

Before Soul can even think to speak, let alone catch his breath, the motionless jointed puppet of him flips between different positions with every sentence.

"Would you do anything she would tell you to?" Its hands are held open to the air.

"Do you care about her more than anything?" One hand is pointed up like a proposal while its head is tilted.

"You would risk your life for her, right?" It's leaning in close to him now, one hand over its heart while the other is reaching in invitation.

"Dude," Soul finally manages to croak out, "what the bloody fuck are you on about?"

The creepy animatronic him laughs like this is some kind of sick joke, arms poised outwards in an open grin. "I'm asking; Would you do anything for Maka!"

"Of course I fucking would; I don't- Why are fucking with me—"

"Great! That's what we like to hear!" His hands clench closer to his chest when the freak has its fingers knitted together, Soul's flight or fight starting to lean more into the latter as- "A compelling premise; Now we need a genre!"

Soul holds his breath while the thing's eyes start rotating rapidly like a slot machine, faster and faster until they suddenly stop, not… having changed, he thinks? Maybe they- "The voices have spoken!" Its fingers are fully stretched out to reveal nothing in its palms. "Oooh, murder mystery! This one's gonna be fun!"

"W-wait, what are you-"

"Come on now, no space to lose!" His sore throat chokes as he's suddenly being picked up by the arms from behind, not even an opening to squawk back as a hat – oh god that better be just a hat – is shoved onto his head and he's then pushed forward into what might've been a hallway. "Time to go!"

Soul's still reeling while his footsteps stutter in front of him, the brick road beneath now glowing faintly under the midnight light of – why the fuck does the moon look like that?!

As is with the rest of Everything preceding him, he doesn't even get the courtesy to stop and think about any of this or the fact he's in a trench coat now as he had apparently been walking this entire time, his fingers jarred by the force he apparently just used to knock on this door a few feet away from where he'd been. For the couple seconds it takes for a rough, burly man to squint at him from the other side opening up, he notes the card-sized object between the fingers of his sweaty pocket by the time the man seems to recognize him. "Ah, Holmes' Agency?"

"I, uhh…" He also notes that his mind and therefore memory is currently still hazy, taking a quick peek at the ID badge before he flashes it to the guy. "Yessir. Sou Leater, P.I."

"Oh thank goodness you're here then, Detective Leater. You couldn't have come sooner." A firm but respectable handshake is quickly exchanged as the man then shows him inside, the air already thick with tension. "There's just been a murder, and we think the killer might have left behind a clue on who the next victim will be."

Detective Leater adjusts his cap and squares his shoulders while following closely after him.

"Let me take a look and I'll see what I can deduce."