#i'm gonna be thinking of this coincidence for a while now :')
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An American and a brit. Logan Sargeant.
Pairing: Logan Sargeant x british!singer!reader, smau
Summary: When a british girl and an american guy go on a date.
Word Count:
Face claim: Sabrina Carpenter & girls from pinterest!!
Disclaimer/s: Not really any, just bickering and stereotypes about america and great britain!! i don't mean to insult anyone and this is all meant playfully between the characters <333
A/N: yayyyyy, i'm motivated rn, i have a bunch of drafts lmao 😝 let me know if you have requests or want to be on my permanent tag list!! <33
♡ Masterlist ♡
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@logansargeant
liked by yourusername, alex_albon, williamsracing, landonorris, oscarpiastri and 495.826.056 others
logansargeant homeeee 🏡
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user1 WHY IS Y/N IN HIS LIKES.
-> user2 OMG YES I NOTICED TWO
-> user3 lowkey they'd be cute together 🙏
user4 MISSED U LOGIE 🫶
user5 the first pic is so cute i'm crying dkfnfk
-> user6 logan + puppy 😍😍😍
yourusername RAHHHHHHH AMERICA 🇺🇸🦅🦅🦅🔥🇺🇸🦅🇺🇸🔥🇺🇸🦅🇺🇸🦅🦅🔥🇺🇸🦅🦅🔥🔥🔥🇺🇸🦅🦅🇺🇸🔥🦅🔥🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🔥🔥🇺🇸🔥🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 liked by author
-> logansargeant that's not...
-> user7 QUEEN SAW AN AMERICAN AND THOUGHT THIS LMAOOO
-> user8 I FEAR SHE LOWKEY ATE WITH THAT
-> user9 REALLLL
landonorris why is y/n in your likes mate?
-> logansargeant 🙃
-> user10 logie, i fear that is not an answer 💔
alex_albon Nice puppy liked by author
-> logansargeant hahaha, thanks dude
-> user11 logan needs to get a puppy now 🙏
user12 my president 😍
-> user13 logan sargeant for president 2025 😌
user14 THIS PHOTO DUMP 🛐
-> user15 TRUEEE THE PUPPY PIC IS ADORABLE
-> user16 MORE LOGIE PUPPY CONTENT 🙏🙏🙏
@yourusername
liked by logansargeant, taylorswift, conangray, oscarpiastri and 5.836.926 others
yourusername next - America 🇺🇸💋
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user1 wait... so... logan and y/n are in america at the same time?
-> user2 coincidence? i think not.
-> user3 they'd be so cute together let's be fr 🙏
user4 y/nlogan 🙏
landonorris i ship liked by author
-> yourusername shush
-> user5 SHE LIKED THE COMMENT THO...
-> user6 she's trying to be slick 😭🙏
user7 soft launch???
user8 yall, we getting y/nlogan before gta 6 with this one 🙏
-> user9 they're divas 🤭
-> user10 perfect for each other fr fr
-> user11 she's gonna be the next wag, i'm telling you
user12 me when y/n 😍😍😍
-> user13 real
user14 the outfits are eating 🥰 liked by author
-> yourusername everybody thank my team 🙏
-> user15 "thank you, y/n's team." we all chant in unison
user16 AMERICAAAAAA 🦅🦅🦅
@f1gossip
liked by user1, user2, user3, user4, user5 and 12.836 others
f1gossip logan sargeant and y/n y/l/n are rumored to be dating! there are reposts of people saying they saw them together in a restaurant in Florida, as well as some people reporting seeing them walking through a city in Florida while holding hands. the two allegedly seemed very comfortable and cozy with each other, both laughing and smiling a lot!
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user1 honestly, i'm so happy for them
-> user2 real, they'd look so good together
user3 american f1 driver x british singer, what else could you want?
user4 new favorite couple 🤭
user5 i hope this is true
-> user6 y/nlogan truthers unite
user7 it is their lives, they don't owe us any information or announcement.
user8 they're both serving face 🙏😍
-> user9 they are literally so pretty
-> user10 to die for 🙏
@logansargeant
liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, landonorris, alex_albon, lilymhe and 1.392.382 others
logansargeant AMERICA HELL YEAH 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🦅🦅🔥🔥🇺🇸🦅🔥🔥🇺🇸🦅🔥🇺🇸🔥🇺🇸🔥🦅🔥🔥🇺🇸🔥🇺🇸🦅🔥🔥🔥🔥🇺🇸🦅🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸🦅🔥🦅🔥🇺🇸🔥🇺🇸🇺🇸 -y/n
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yourusername omg, what an amazing caption 😍 liked by author
-> logansargeant yeah, i wonder who wrote it..
-> user1 must be a genius 🙏
user2 okay but how is she literally drop dead gorgeous 😭❤️
-> user3 real
-> user4 oh, to look like y/n
-> user7 😭
landonorris couple goals?? liked by author
-> user5 i am in shock
-> user6 is this the prove?
user7 screaming 😍
user8 kicking my feet and giggling rn, i hope they're actually together 🙏🙏🙏
-> user9 imma pray for it to be true
-> user10 i will summon y/nlogan
user11 okay, casually leaving this here?
-> user12 YEAH, LIKE DAMNNN
user13 dare i say, this is my new favorite couple 🙏
-> user14 honestly, it's my favorite now too
@yourusername
liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, f1gossip, lilymhe, alex_albon and 3.683.916 others
yourusername my boyfriend doesn't know what a kilometer is 😣❤️
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logansargeant a kilometer is the equivalent of 567.571 Taylor Swifts 🥰 liked by author
-> yourusername giggling at this rn, i love you ❤️
-> logansargeant i love you too!! (even though you drink tea and spell colour like 'color') liked by author
-> user1 damn, the stereotypes are coming out
logansargeant having a bri'ish girlfriend>>>> liked by author
-> user2 okay but i love them 😭
lilymhe soooo happy for you two and can't wait to meet you 💕 liked by author
-> yourusername thank you, darling!! i can't wait either, you're an amazing golfer 🫶❤️
-> lilymhe ahhhhh!! tysm i'm hugeeee fan of you and your music 🫶 liked by author
-> user3 y/n and the other wags are already starting to become friends 😭♥️
-> user4 i'm so invested in this
user5 this is actually the best way of hard launching lmaoooo 😭🙏
-> user6 reallll, i love how they're bickering in the comment sections
flavy.barla gorgeous gorgeous girl 🥰🥰🥰 liked by author
user7 why r they serving face 🙏
-> user8 fr 😭
user9 me and who?
-> user10 we all need a logan or a y/n in our lives
-> user11 logan getting p1 in fp1 😍
user12 logan hunter sargeant, the man you are 🛐
user13 my wife is dating someone else 😣
-> user14 real 😭
user15 just fell to my knees in a parking lot
-> user17 valid reaction
user16 just saw someone fall to their knees in a parking lot
-> user18 average 😣🛐
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A/N: yayyyyy, i'm holding pack on a few stories rn because i have soooo much to do!! hope u enjoyed!! reblogs, comments, likes, follows and feedback are greatly appreciated <333
tag list!
@freyathehuntress
#f1#fluff#formula one#formula 1#logan sargeant#logan sargeant x reader#logan sargeant x you#logan sargeant x female reader#ls2#ls2 x reader#ls2 fic#ls2 x you#ls2 imagine#ls2 fluff#social media au#f1 smau#logan sargeant fanfic#logan sargeant fic#logan sargeant blurb#logan sargeant one shot#logan sargeant x y/n#ln2 x y/n#ls2 smau
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this is gonna be an off the cuff ramble/vent so don't read if that doesn't interest you.
I am thinking I'm going to back away from Ikuhara fandom in the next six months (coinciding with when I finish the rewatches I'm doing in my server). I feel like I've exhausted what I have to say about his shows, and I've also developed a very specific way of understanding them which clashes with others. I'm torn between feeling like it's worth trying to delineate my own understanding and feeling that I'm just being territorial, pedantic, or close minded. at a certain point, even if I could be proved "right" on my interpretations, I'm losing the enjoyment I should have in the stories by caring what other people think about them. at the moment, I'm thinking I want to flesh a couple more ideas and then let it rest. I'll always be grateful to Ikuhara and happy I put time into this blog, but nothing lasts forever.
so all of that to say... I was on the fence about writing what I'm about to write. I recommend people who don't want to read someone objecting to common RGU fan interpretations to just check out now. I'm not trying to start anything. but after reflecting on it, I decided it to share my thoughts on this topic; I think it's worth saying, even if it makes me look contrarian or problematic.
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I watched RGU in 2014, right as the western fandom was experiencing a shift in how it approached the show. I won't detail all that went on during that time--today I'm specifically interested in two characters: Nanami and Miki.
before, I'd say the fandom was overall less critical. things were taken more at face value. for instance, Nanami was not always taken seriously, while characters like Miki, just because they were "nice," were seen as "good guys." however as time's wore on, there's been a backlash to that way of approaching the show. the characters most likely to have received misogynistic hate in the past (Anthy, Shiori, Nanami, and Kozue, mainly) were reinterpreted, while "good guy" characters were increasingly scrutinized.
that was a good thing, as it was a counterbalance to the previous attitude. however, it's been more than a decade since I joined the fandom, and I still see people talking like it's 2014. the way that people have reinterpreted the anime has, often, not resulted in interesting readings. this is because people are still applying an ideological lens to the story, rather than engaging with how it presents itself.
I specifically want to highlight Nanami in this regard. I check the RGU tag almost every single day, and I have seen scores of posts which are nigh-identical to each other. it's always people talking about how she's a "calf to the slaughter," she's actually a victim, etc. and I just... don't get anything out of it.
I think a lot of this shift began with this essay series called Palace Perspective. it's been a long time since I read it--actually before my Utena renaissance--but I didn't like it at the time. it was written in this very self-serious style, and all I remember it arguing was "Nanami is a victim, Touga is a bad guy." I'd loved the Touga/Nanami relationship since I first watched RGU, and that was never how I felt about it. Touga certainly harms Nanami, but based on the series itself, it seemed to me that in large part, Touga was the victim, and Nanami was harmed by his victimization.
anyway, since around the time that essay series came out, people have had this attitude of "actually Nanami is a very deep character, you guys," as if it needs to be repeated over and over. and there's a denial that Nanami is a comic relief character--"actually her being funny is just a ruse because the show is camouflaging that she's a victim!" okay, yes, they do lure you in to Nanami's story slowly; she's initially silly, but all along hiding under that was some serious shit. I'm not denying that. but I'm also not buying that line entirely.
the Shadow Girls do an entire play about how Nanami's comedic suffering is the result of her own actions (they call it "divine justice"). take episode 16 specifically. yes, we have Nanami dreaming about being a calf for the slaughter. that is a great scene and indicative of the unhealthy relationship between her and Touga. but isn't the crux of the episode that Nanami is making a fool of herself??? she tries to one-up Juri at a party. her failure to realize what the cowbell is highlights her ignorance. the show is absolutely poking fun at her. you can go into why Nanami ended up this way, but I don't understand how we've gotten to the point where people are so over-serious about Nanami--and RGU in general--that they can't laugh at it.
I'll take a detour here to talk about Miki. it's become increasingly popular to frame him as a sexist--I've even seen him termed a "raging misogynist." he gets blamed for his strained relationship with his sister and written off as "just as bad as the other male characters." that's another case where I really don't see it. or at least, I feel like people have lost track of degrees in these things. Miki seems unsure of what he believes, sometimes expressing progressive views but other times regressive ones, and he does act within a patriarchal system. but does he comport himself that badly? or is he just a normal 13-year-old boy who falls into temptation?
I want to make a comparison between him and Nanami here. I think you could make a very real case that Nanami has far more sexist beliefs than Miki. she treats every female character as competition, as a hussy out to steal her brother. when she finds out the truth about Anthy and Akio, she immediately jumps to victim blaming Anthy. and another thing: Nanami plays princess.
the fact that so many people write about Nanami but this aspect of her character is rarely commented on is mind boggling. it's like, her whole thing. Nanami wants to be the center of the universe; Touga is her everything and she wants to possess Touga. she constantly acts the victim and tries to manipulate things so her enemies look like the villain.
I'm not saying this to shit on Nanami! I love Nanami, she's one of my favorite characters of all time! but I've found it alienating to be in a fandom where whitewashing is framed as appreciation. even her backstory: people make post after post about how it wasn't Nanami's fault she killed the cat, because she's a victim. here's the problem with that: why are we engaging with the story on the level of blame? I recently read an essay on methods of analysis that placed "vilification and heroization" as the lowest form of engagement with fiction. I understand why someone would want to defend a character from attack, but aside from like, youtube comments or old forum posts, who exactly is attacking Nanami? and also, how is saying "actually she's a victim so that explains everything" accomplishing anything?
I am being unfair here, because some people do engage with the work enough to say more than that. people will point to the neglect Nanami experienced as the cause of her behavior. that's there, it's certainly there. I'm not objecting to serious attempts to explain character motivation in reaction to vilifiction, but more to the impulse to try to paint characters as morally pure. isn't Nanami so great because she's so complicated? when people approach the story with the drive to whitewash, so much of the nuance and feeling of the work goes unnoticed. episode 31 and 32 do portray Nanami as a victim (of Touga and of her parents and of Akio). however, they also portray Nanami's motivations, and not all of them are pretty. over the course of the arc, you watch her entire worldview fall apart. it doesn't matter whether not it's "her fault" she has that worldview--the process is painful and humiliating either way.
all of this carries through to how people react to both Nanami's final scene in the show and her comic relief section in the film. the comic relief scene is bad because it doesn't take Nanami seriously enough, while her final scene is bad because it shows her waiting on Touga and Saionji, which is sexist because she's partaking in traditional gender roles. the only way I can understand those reactions is that people didn't actually pay attention to how she was portrayed in the show, as a comic relief character or as a serious character. I'd understand the objection if Anthy's final scene involved her waiting on Akio, but Anthy and Nanami are different characters (I also don't get much out of the endless Anthy/Nanami posts because of how they are flattened in comparisons). unlike Anthy, Nanami spent the entire show demanding to be waited on, but when we see her for the last time, she's contentedly serving others. that is called character development.
I wanted to highlight Miki and Nanami because I feel they point to a major problem of the fandom: the maintenance of the prince and the princess, just with new definitions. the prince is bad, masculine, harmful, and needs to be rejected. the princess is good, feminine, eternally victimized, and above question. I find this sad because I thought we were supposed to be transcending the gender binary. I know saying this makes me sound anti-feminist, but I'm not. I'm not saying "oh we need to transcend the gender binary by never criticizing men or ignoring how women are victimized"; that would be stupid. but my vision of feminism is vigilantly critical of all things, evaluates each situation on an individual basis, and avoids self-flattery and self-deception.
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My favorite works in no particular order:
Tipsy Tales (Anemo Boys)
Symbiosis (Ayato)
What Destiny Has Brought (Fischl)
Hello How Are You (Gorou)
Follow the Wind II (Kazuha)
Of the Same Coin (Mika)
Songs of the Wind (Venti)
Nothing Lasts Forever (Yae Miko)
Sharing a Drink They Call Loneliness (Zhongli)
Of Hopes and Prayers (Zhongli)
#about me#it actually is a coincidence that majority are from different characters and not the same#so in like manner as another list i gave a while back i shall give fun facts about each#tipsy tales - one day i will update the post to include wanderer and will not tell anyone or reblog it#symbiosis - one of my favorite readers. i just like the way they speak. i dont have a full story planned for them as of yet#what destiny has brought - in truth i cannot stand fischl. she annoys me. i only wrote this bc i wanted her to stop being so delusional#hello how are you - tbh i only like this bc i think i absolutely nailed the voice and characterization. one day i will write a sequel#follow the wind ii - probably my all time favorite work. features one of the few kisses i have ever written.#(cont) but it cant be understood without reading the first chapter and my thoughts on kazuha as a character#of the same coin - i'll be honest i just think this is cute. i think this fic has one of my highest reblog to notes ratios#songs of the wind - the vibes are good with this one. like the first chapter has good vibes but this chapter is even better. very warm#nothing lasts forever - i wanted to write yae in a moment of weakness. i think i did a good job#sharing a drink they call loneliness - the amateurness of the writing now makes me wince but.... the catharsis and ending is still top notch#(cont) i had a point i wanted to make with this fic and smashed it out of the ballpark#of hopes and dreams - probably the most romantic fic in the series and its a deleted scene lmao. still like how i wrote it though#i forgot to say that these arent necessarily my best written fics#they're just the fics i personally like the best#honorable mentions are:#telling them off (ayato)#completely covered in red (ayato)#simple (alhaitham)#follow the wind i (another one i completely nailed the voice and characterization for in my humble opinion)#secret identities and whatnot (venti/xiao)#indulgence (wriothesley)#slitherer-outer (zhongli)#i know i'm kinda feeling myself in this post but nobody is gonna read it anyway except for u slo so i'm fine with that <3
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OKAY BUT THE FACT THAT IN JTTA THE CELESTIAL REALM'S LIGHTBRINGER FESTIVAL IS NAMED FOR LUCIFER AND THEN THE NEW GAME BASED ON THE CONSEQUENCES OF HIS REBELLION IS CALLED NIGHTBRINGHER???
COINCIDENCE? YEAH PROBABLY BUT IT MAKES ME INSANE ANYWAY
OH i didn't think of that at all!! that's so cool :00
#answering asks#anon asks#i'm gonna be thinking of this coincidence for a while now :')#it works too well
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because i'm feeling chatty today but i know my sentences won't make lots of sense i don't know that the medicine i'm taking for the fibromyalgia is the best fit for me actually. i'm kind of thinking maybe the mental side effects aren't worth the pain relief lol.
#this post brought to you by#the realization as i've stepped back down to 10mg and am taking a look back at the past like month or so#that while yeah my hip problem went away almost immediately because my whole body wasn't in pain constantly#and i stopped having to take regular intervals of NSAIDs throughout the day in order to stave off the fiercest edge of the pain#i'm kind of thinking the intensity of the mental symptoms is more than i want to deal with long-term#is it possible they'd even out if i kept taking it? i mean ANYTHING is possible that's a silly question#but at the same time this is actually kind of distressing and frankly if there's other options that don't make me go fucking nuts#AND makes it so my pain levels are manageable and even reasonable i'd prefer that#like don't get me wrong it 100% did work for what it was supposed to be doing#but also it's technically a depression medication and the mental problems are more concerning because of that#this is like. midsummer levels of frequent breakdowns and this is meant to be the time of year i don't have those#like yes sure i can blame some of it on the holiday season but the coincidence of it being so much worse than i anticipated it while i'm on#this new medicine is just a little too much for me to ignore#the doctor didn't actually prescribe enough of the medicine to last me until the 2 month mark for the appointment i scheduled with her#so i made the decision to start stepping it back down#and the problems decreased significantly off of the higher dose#the pain did return a little though and i'm... not looking forward to the time i'm gonna have to be off of it entirely#but it is what it is and this is probably just going to be Life now#trying a new medicine and figuring out if i can live with the side effects over and over again#i know this is only the first one and it was very pipe-dream to hope it would work perfectly for me#but like i'm still allowed to be bummed that something that almost completely takes away my physical pain#makes my brain unlivable#i should go take some acetaminophen...and i might add a couple ibuprofen in too for good measure#*sad lain noises*
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AFTER HOURS! — NANAMI KENTO
thinking about nanami coming home late at night after a long day at work. You're fast asleep in bed, tucked under the covers while he takes a shower. You wake up to the sound of the water running, tired eyes taking notice of the bathroom light peaking out from under the doorway and your husbands watch on the nightstand. Not even five minutes pass by and nanami walks out the bathroom with nothing but his boxers on, damp hair framing his chiseled face as the towel hangs around his neck. You can't help but stare, eyeing him like a piece of candy, toned muscles reflecting from the bathroom light.
"Sorry sweetheart, did I wake you?" He asks with a soft voice, switching off the bathroom light. You swear you could feel yourself drooling over the man in front of you, so glad that you get to call him your husband.
"Darling, my eyes are up here," he chuckles.
"Huh? Oh, yeah, sorry, no, I'm fine." You stumble over your words. Nanami has a smug smirk on his face as he crawls into bed, hovering you before planting a kiss to your plush lips.
"Cat got your tongue?" He questions, pecking your lips.
"Maybe," you playfully say. "But you wanna know something weird?" You suddenly bring up. He hums in response, peppering your neck with delicate kisses.
"I think I just started ovulating, like, right now," you say in a sarcastic tone.
"Oh, yeah?" He smirks down at you. "That is weird. I wonder what could've caused it..."
"I know, right!? What a coincidence!" You shake your head in disbelief, scoffing. "Definitely had nothing to do with you walking out of the bathroom with practically nothing on and wet hair."
"Oh, definitely not!" He chuckles, causing you to giggle. His hands sneakily make their way to your shorts, pulling at the waistband.
"Yeah, no, of course not!" You shake your head with furrowed brows. "But," you plant a kiss on his lips as his hand continue to pull down your shorts, "in no way am I complaining."
"Me neither, darling. I'm gonna enjoy tonight."
#—☆classyrbf#anime#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#nanami x reader smut#nanami x reader fluff#nanami x reader#nanami kento x reader#nanami smut#nanami fluff#jjk nanami#nanami x you#nanami x y/n#nanami kento x y/n#nanami kento x you#nanami kento#jjk smut#jjk fluff
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I know we're not on the Hearts chapter but, I have a feeling the SSR will be Cater? But also him having the tear animation, since I have a feeling his dream will be a bit like Ruggie's q-q
I'm leaning towards either Cater or Ace, personally! Trey and Deuce have kinda already had their character arcs -- though someone else did mention to me that they thought it might be Trey, because so far all the vices have gotten one. though that might just be coincidence. we'll find out I guess!
my red-string-on-corkboard theory is that Ace is gonna get his arc + UM during whatever goes down with Grim, so while I could be completely wrong, I think it'd be nice if it were Cater's time to shine! ...also I am VERY curious as to what his dream is gonna be. 👀 like, I don't think he's gonna be all angsty or anything, he's a pretty cheery guy even though he pretends to be more vapid than he is, but...what would he be like if he were less. y'know.
(also I kind of want him to get the focus just because I think it'd be a shame if all he got was a super-quick 'oh his dream is to have a billion followers or whatever, now let's go on to the next person'. c'mon Twst. give him some love.)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#this is only speculation but i'm gonna put the chapter tags in anyway just in case#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 12 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 12 spoilers#i have seen people bring up the possibility of pre-canon deuce and i do think he would be visually different enough#but i think that would have to be like...a rook situation where it's a byproduct of whatever his actual wish was#because i don't think his dream would be to go back to that#buuuuuuut i dunno! they've been throwing some unexpected stuff at us so i'm trying not to form really solid expectations or anything#i do think the hearts dreams are gonna have to be a little rushed just cause there's four of 'em to get through :(#and while it would've been really nice to get in-depth dreams for everyone#episode 7 is already ridiculously long as it is#here's hoping the every-two-months holds though and we don't have to wait too long to find out :')
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Fuck it, we ball, I hope that disrespectful anon gets hemorrhoids and they can't get them removed until next year, AND that their insurance doesn't cover it. I'm here thinking about your Omega idea where omegas normally do the pursuing, but with a slight twist; the boys being the omegas. An alpha who is for sure down bad for the boys, but thinks "ah, theyre out of my league, I should be aiming lower, manage my expectations". Only 141 is just as down bad for them, and they're doing everything just short of screaming "PICK UP ON THE HINTS, COME INTO OUR HOUSE AND BEDS AND LIVES AND STAY FOREVER PLEASE"
Johnny is about to say fuck decorum and just show up in reader's house wearing nothing but a ribbon and a tag that says 'free to a good home' (your home is the good one, please keep him, there is no receipt so you can't return him).
Price has the brain cell normally in terms of trying to gently coax you into getting you to say you're into them, he has a 15 step plan that may or may not involve using his various contacts to get you spending more time in close proximity to them. Also he for some reason is always baking, he always comes over asking you for sugar? (He'll take any kind of 'sugar' you're willing to offer, he loves making a variety of cream pies)
Gaz is always gently inviting them to attend 'friend' things, things that could be a date but that he can excuse as 'well we're coworkers/friends/neighbors, we should get along :)'. It's just a coincidence that various other people seem to bail except for any of the other boys, now why don't you sit beside him so you guys can share popcorn at the movies (you both always seem to be reaching for it at the same time, if your fingers touched anymore you might as well be holding hands)
Simon is chasing off any omegas he thinks are a threat to them getting reader, that is THEIR alpha, paws OFF (rip to anyone reader was halfheartedly going on dates with, this man is gonna become those people's sleep paralysis demon)
Hope you enjoy!! :3 💕💕 i lovedddd writing this sm omg
See, the thing is, you’d always thought of yourself as a decent Alpha. Not overbearing, not egotistical, not a demanding freak- just capable and steady. But you weren’t extraordinary. Not the kind of Alpha Omegas like them would look at twice. And so, while you worked alongside the men of Task Force 141 you convinced yourself to be content with just admiring them from a distance.
You couldn’t help it. They were perfect, as far as you were concerned. Perfect, and fully out of your league.
Surely, Omegas like them would want someone better. Someone stronger. You’d told yourself that so many times it was practically your mantra, the only way you’d be able to stop yourself from pursuing them. They deserved someone more charismatic, more confident- an Alpha who could match their brilliance. Not someone like you, fumbling through conversations with them, struggling to keep your feelings in check.
But they’d already decided. They didn’t need a flashy Alpha or someone who tried too hard. What they wanted was you. The only problem? You didn’t seem to realize it, no matter how obvious they made it.
John took the lead, naturally. He knew you were cautious and perhaps a little insecure when it came to relationships (it was fucking visible in you, silly Alpha. He scoffs each time you draw back, frustrated), so he made it his mission to draw you in- slowly and subtly. His plan was meticulous: get you comfortable, build trust, and create opportunities for you to spend more time with them so you’d see that they only want you.
Maybe then you’d break out of that stupid shell you’ve put yourself in.
He’d started baking regularly, a habit you hadn’t even known he had. At least once a week, he’d show up at your place with a tin of cookies, a loaf of fresh bread, or a perfectly golden pie. “Thought I’d share,” he’d say casually, though the slight smirk tugging at his lips told a different story. He peers at you, letting his scent coil just a bit more. “I hope you don’t mind the amount of cream. I happen to like cream pies a lot.”
The way to an Alpha’s heart is through their stomach, and all that.
If he wasn’t offering you baked goods, he was asking for your help to make said baked goods. “Ran out of sugar again,” he’d sigh, handing you an empty container. “Mind sparing a bit?”
It was ridiculous, downright unbelievable how often he supposedly ran out of baking supplies. But his visits became a highlight of your week, and the lingering looks he gave you left your heart pounding long after he was gone.
The one time he’d handfed you, watching you lick the syrup from his fingers with half-lidded eyes, still lives in your mind rent-free.
Kyle took a softer, more personal approach. He wasn’t above using the pretense of friendship to spend time with you, often inviting you to casual dates- grabbing coffee, going to the movies, or just walking through town and shopping. Every invitation was framed innocently, but there was always a little extra effort behind it. He’d pick a movie he knew you’d like, suggest places he knew you’d find interesting, and ensure that others you unfortunately knew joined just enough to make it seem less like a date.
Somehow, though, those other people always mysteriously canceled. It was never anything dramatic- just a sudden cold, a scheduling conflict, or a “something came up, sorry.” Eventually, it would be just you and a very smug Kyle, sitting close enough that your knees brushed or reaching for popcorn at the same time. Once, right as the bowl emptied and you both reached for it, Kyle simply thought fuck it and held your hand.
On one occasion, you both shared a bowl of spaghetti and ended up with the scene from the Lady and the Tramp.
It was so painfully obvious to everyone.
Except you.
“It’s not a coincidence,” Kyle muttered to Johnny one evening after you left, both of them sitting in the spot you were in, bathing in the leftover warmth and scent. “How can they not notice?”
Speaking of Johnny; he’s barely keeping himself together. Subtlety in missions are a must sometimes, but he doesn’t want to that with you anymore. He was just so, so, so frustrated with your obliviousness. What more does he need to do to show you that he- that they- want you?
He’s been dropping so many hints; half-jokes about Omegas waiting begging to be swept off their feet, suggestive winks when you compliment him in that lovely, adoring tone of yours. Once, while watching a romantic tv show, he’d sighed loudly and very pointedly said: “If only someone would claim me.”
“If ye don’t figure it out soon,” he growled at the others one night, pacing back and forth like a wild beast and probably on his way to leave a dent in the carpet, “I’m showin’ up at their doorstep with nothin’ but a red bow, like some bloody Christmas prezzie, I swear to god.”
John sighs, rolling his eyes. “You do that, and I’m leaving you on their porch.”
“That’s exactly what I’m askin’ for!”
Simon took the quietest but most direct approach. Just not exactly direct towards you. While the others worked to get closer to you, Simon focused on eliminating what he saw as obstacles: other Omegas who thought you were free for the taking. It didn’t matter if they were serious or just someone you’d gone on a casual date with- Simon saw them all as threats.
He didn’t have to say much to scare them off. A single cold glare from across the room, sharp bursts of his scent, or a low, menacing comment was usually enough to send them packing. He didn’t care if it was excessive.
You were his Alpha. You were their Alpha, and no one else had a right to you.
But even Simon softened when it came to you. He couldn’t put all his thoughts, all his feelings into words, so he did them with his actions. Quiet protectiveness, gentle, careful touches. Moments of fleeting vulnerabilities shared between you and him.
He was always there for you. Even if you didn’t know you need him with you.
Still, despite all their efforts, you remained convinced that they weren’t interested.
In the end, to no one’s surprise, it’s Johnny who snaps. Johnny, so close to his heat, so absolutely done with your obliviousness and the Omegas that aren’t them talking with you when you should be only focused on them.
He doesn’t care; leaves the carefully made nest with your stolen shirts and none of the others stop him when he just. Drags your surprised self to the nest.
“Johnny! You-“
“I want you.” He hisses, bares his teeth all sharp and desperate. “We want you. And damn it, we will have you.”
And well, who are you to even say no when this is all you have wanted?
#noona.asks#cod x reader#cod#cod x you#tf 141 x reader#tf 141#tf 141 x you#john price x reader#cod omegaverse#simon ghost riley x you#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x you#ghost x reader#simon riley x you#simon riley x reader#kyle gaz garrick x you#kyle gaz garrick x reader#gaz x reader#gaz x you#soap x you#soap x reader#johnny soap mctavish x you#johnny soap mctavish x reader#poly!141 x reader#poly 141 x reader#poly!141#poly 141#call of duty x reader#cod imagines#noona.writes
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Thinking of Incel!Gyutaro who is absolutely obsessed with you. Keeping your discarded things, following you home, stalking your social media, the whole nine yards.
You finally notice him at a party and let him take you home. You're so sweet and perfect, he can't imagine why all your relationships are so short lived. That is until your riding him, kissing up and down his neck adoringly and he can't keep up.
He throws his head back as he empties, trying to lift your hips up so he pull out, but you double down, sitting all the way on it while he cries out. "Fuck, fuck, baby, please I'm not wearin' a rubber...'
You simply giggle, purring affectionately in his ear, mercilessly dragging your hips up and down, plowing straight past his limit without a care in the world. Never in his wildest dreams did he ever think he'd get so lucky as to creampie any girl, let alone you. Now you're fucking yourself on his spent dick like you own it, he swears your writing your name on it with your hips.
"Fuck, baby, never wanna let you go," He rasps, wincing at the overstimulation. Again, you giggle, playfully nipping his neck. "Fuckin' obsessed with you, you're never gettin' rid-a me." Your sweet laugher drives him wild and he finally asks: "W-What's so funny?"
"You're just too cute..." You coo softly. "You really think I'm stuck with you?"
His face pales, thinking you're gonnna leave at any moment. "I-I mean-"
"It's you who's stuck with me, baby..."
At that moment, it clicks for him. Meeting you at the party wasn't a happy accident. Sharing every class despite having different majors was no coincidence. All your socials being public and then suddenly private after he followed you was carefully orchestrated. This was why all your relationships never made it past a month. It was the lovesick, possessive look in your eye.
"You'll never leave me like all those other guys, will you, Gyutaro?" You ask softly, still rough riding him. "Gonna be mine forever, right?"
"'Course I will," He agrees, well aware he's in over his head, but your hypnotic voice and the heavenly heat of your cunt makes his choice for him. "I'm all yours, forever."
#demon slayer#demon slayer x reader#demon slayer smut#kny#kny smut#gyutaro#gyutaro shabana#gyutaro x reader#gyutaro smut
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#you'd think I'd learn not to agree to cover for my boss while she's on vacation after i got sick#like actual sick#like almost passed out from a high fever kinda sick#both times#like. it's not a coincidence#it's the stress making my immune system unable to handle something like a normal flu#you'd think I'd learn!!#but no!!!#i did it again and now I'm sick again#and it's worse than the flu and it hurts and ugh!!!!!#i only have myself to blame i guess#i haven't been taking care of myself#i've been skipping lunch and i'm so tired from staying until late every day and just!! stressed!! all the time!!#and i know none of that helps!! but!! what can you do#on top of that i had to spend like 60 dollars on meds just now and i'm Annoyed#>:(#prob gonna delete this later but right now i'm just angry at myself for accepting this knowing very well that I can't handle stress well#someday I'll learn to say no#some!! day!!#if you read all of this i'm sorry ignore me bla bla the usual
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rumour has it | LN4
pairings: lando norris x model!fem!oc summary: everyone knows Lando has been single for a while, but when fans start to notice too many coincidences involving him and a model, his relationship status suddenly becomes the center of attention.
landonorris posted to his story!
[caption 1; ✈️✈️] [caption 3; it's summer time babyyy]
irinakrausse posted to her story!
[caption 1; what time is it? summer time!] [caption 2; my serotonin levels right now📈📈]
lnfour
liked by angryginge13, maxfewtrell, olivernorris1 and 71,203 others!
lnfour besties who go on vacation together, stay together 🤜🤛
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user1 f1's greatest wag
user2 SAY IT LOUDER user3 apparently max has competition now👀 user4 user3 NEVER user5 user3 context??? user6 user5 according to f1twt lando is on vacation not only with friends and family but also with a model named irina user7user5 crazy people who assume that Lando and Irina are together just because they are both on a yacht at sea🤦♀️
team_quadrant things we love to see 🫶
user8 aww literal boyfriends
user9 i guess not only "besties" are on vacation with lando right now huh ☕
user10 i'm gone for 1 minute and now lando is supposedly dating a new girl??? bro give me a break
user11 nah they're not dating, i don't even think they're in the same place tbh 😂😂 user12 user11 i've been saying this!!! people see them on a yacht and at sea and assume they're next to each other lol
user13 can we focus on lando and max matching outfits?? 😻
user14 they're soulmates if u ask me user15 best duo for real 🧡
irinakrausse
liked by riabish, landonorris, francisca.cgomes, and 35,978 others!
irinakrausse We got no troubles, life is the bubbles under the sea🧜♀️
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user1 i'm here for f1twt but bro i didn't expect her to be so beautiful like omg??
user2 RIGHT??? i think i'm in love now 😍 user3 i was ready to be jealous of her but now i'm jealous of lando tbh user4 user3 MOOD. SHE'S SO PRETTY
user5 oh lando i totally get you now 😳
user6 man has incredible taste honestly
user7 i'm no better than a man omg
lailahasanovic what a woman🥵🔥
liked by irinakrausse
user8 laila sweety what are u doing here?? user9 user8 u new here? laila and irina have been friends for a long time lol user10 user9 when people find out that Irina has more wag friends they're gonna lose their minds😂
user11 lando this lando that but IRINA HOW CAN YOU BE SO PRETTY???? 😍😍
user12 not lando liking the pic😂
user13 he's been liking irina's pics for months now, this is nothing new haha user14 i'm more surprised to see ria in the likes tbh user15 yeah yeah but WHAT ABOUT KIKA??? user16 user15 they've worked together
user17 STUNNING 😍😍😍
user18 JUST ONE CHANCE IRINA PLEASE😭🙏
landonorris
liked by carlossainz55, martingarrix, irinakrausse, and 218,054 others!
landonorris aquaman who?
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user1 y'all he's mine go away
user2 get in line girl 🙄 user3 i'm afraid he's already taken user4 user3 WHAT DID I MISS?? user5 user4 girl where have u been the last week?😂 streets are sayin' he's on vacation with a model user6 user4 he's on vacation with friends, don't believe dumb rumors
user7 SIR I WASN'T PREPARED OMG😳😳
user8 liked by irina krausse 👀
user9 she's trying so hard to be relevant
user10 user9 ... it's just a like, jeez
user11 i would kill for that smile 🥹
user12 FR SO PRETTY user13 lando's smile >>>>>> user14 okay but now imagine that irina was the one who took the photo and lando is looking at her like this🥹 user15 user14 STOP my heart would melt 😩 user16 user14 I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING
mclaren lookin' good 🔥🔥
user17 admin being a total mood
danielricciardo cool pics, can i borrow the photographer?😇
landonorris no. user18 DANNY WHAT DO YOU KNOW
irinakrausse posted to her story!
irinakrausse
liked by savnorris, pietra.pilao, landonorris, and 79,828 others!
irinakrausse already missing my vitamin sea 🌞
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user1 WOAH
user2 my sentiments exactly
lilymhe it should be illegal to look this good in public💘
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user3 LILY?????? user4 is this a way of welcoming the new wag? 👀 user5 user4 this clout chaser is NOT a wag user6 user5 jealous much? lol user7 lily honey tell us what u know pleeeease
user8 i wanna be lando so bad right now 😳
user9 she looks like luisa or is it just me?
user10 I'm glad I'm not the only one who noticed the resemblance🫣 user11 lando clearly has a type 😅 user12 luisa is way more beautiful than this girl. user13 user12 there's no need to compare two gorgeous women, grow up
user14 A WARNING NEXT TIME PLEASE i wasn't ready for the last pic 🥵
user15 this is such a mood tbh user16 and lando is getting all that i can't believe his luck 😫
user17 SO PRETTY OMG 😍😍
user18 is that lando's hand in the 5th pic or am i crazy?
user19 IT'S HIS BRACELET 100% user20 you're crazy indeed
irinakrausse posted to her story!
[caption 1; work time!] [caption 2; 📸] [caption 3; 😴😴]
| landonorris replied to your story
landonorris
liked by martingarrix, irinakrausse, patriciooward, and 988,756 others!
landonorris CARLANDO PODIUM BABY!! 🏆
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mclaren EVERYBODY LOVED THAT 🔥🔥
user1 let's go team!!! user2 PLEASE MCLAREN WE NEED THEM TOGETHER AGAIN😭😭 user3 ADMIN BEING A TOTAL MOOD RN user4 vamooooos!!!!! user5 ADMIN IS ONE OF US ❤️🧡
user6 massive win for us Carlando girlies 😭💖
user7 I'M SO HAPPY OMG user8 my carlando heart is full of joy rn 😭❤️🩹
user9 YOU GUYS SLAYEDDDDD ❤️🔥❤️🔥
carlossainz55 VAMOS, CABRÓN 👊🏆
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user10 carlando nation we really won 🥹 user11 BEST DUO FR 🚀 user12 OUR BOYS ❤️🧡
team_quadrant i'm not crying, you are 😭😭
user13 are u crying?? hahaha... i think i'm crying! user14 user13 elite reference right there
user15 best podium of the season!!! 🫶
irinakrausse That was a smooth operation indeed! 🫡🏆
liked by landonorris
user16 so we got carlando podium AND irina's first comment on lando's ig? HOW ARE WE FEELING CHAT? user17 user16 OH WE REALLY WON user18 hard launch is around the corner y'all 👀 user19 user18 *pretends to be shocked* 😂
user20 SO PROUD OF YOU TWO 🧡🧡
irinakrausse posted to her story!
[caption 1; rise and shine, everyone!] [caption 2; someone's back🧡]
lando.jpg
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lando.jpg 🦄❄️
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user1 HE POSTED IRINA!!!!!
user2 it was about damn time! user3 bro really said i'm in love and i want everyone to know that user4 user3 and i respect him for it 😂 user5 user3 i mean it's irina, who could blame him? user6 is that really irina? user7 user6 they're in the same place, you can confirm it in Irina's stories
user8 5th slide is my new roman empire
user9 the way i just SCREAMED omg user10 wasn't expecting that at all 😂
user11 he didn't win the championship but won at love🫶 how cute
liked by lando.jpg
user12 HE LIKED IT OMG user13 that like it's all the confirmation i need
user14 bestie don't be shy and drop more pics with irina 🤭
user15 are we gonna talk about the unicorn helmet or what?
user16 that's high fashion if u ask me user17 i'll never understand how irina fell in love with lando when he has this kind of looks😂 user18 user17 yeah but have you seen lando? 🫦 user19 user17 she saw he was rich and fell for him lol user20 user19 ugh haters are not allowed in here, go away🤮
irinakrausse posted to her story!
[caption 1; white paradise🤍] [caption 2; 🤍✨]
landonorris posted to his story!
[caption 2; 🤍✨] [caption 3; ☃️⛷️]
irinakrausse
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irinakrausse ❄️
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user1 the real question is: can lando fight?
user2 one day you're fighting for lando and the next you're fighting WITH lando user3 user2 that's the ✨irina effect✨
user4 this woman is unreal 😍😍
user5 lando watch out cause you and i are not friends
user6 so we're all in love with irina right? user7 user6 of course we are! user8 user6 i mean just look at her! 😻
user9 irina please drop your hair routine for the girlies🙏
user10 c'mon guys!!! new year has to bring their relationship confirmation (i'm probably delulu but whatever)
user11 we've waited enough, i can't do this anymore😩 user12 we need to keep manifesting 🕯️🕯️
user13 STUNNING 😍
landonorris do you wanna build a snowman?
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user14 alright bro's in love 😂 user15 sir u need to keep workin on these pickup lines user16 lando no-rizz strikes again user17 user16 i meaaan irina loves disney movies, so i guess he does have the rizz 🤷♀️
user18 MOTHER IS MOTHERING 🔥🔥🔥
user19 okay but who was the photographer? 👀
user20 sis we all know the answer to that 😏
landonorris
liked by oscarpiastri, pierregasly, irinakrausse, and 899,328 others!
landonorris Happy birthday to the most intelligent, funny and gorgeous woman I've ever met. Love you, darling🧡
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user1 Y'ALL IT'S HAPPENING OMFG
user2 MOM AND DAD 🗣️🗣️
user3 IT'S FINALLY OFFICIAL
maxfewtrell woah hold on, irina was your gf?
georgerussell63 WAIT WHAT carlossainz55 WAIT WHAT alex_albon WAIT WHAT maxverstappen1 WAIT WHAT danielricciardo WAIT WHAT charles_leclerc WAIT WHAT landonorris y'all stfu 🙄 user4 LOOOOOOL user5 it was the worst secret ever kept 😂
user6 alexa play that should be me (u two are so cute tho😻)
user7 i wanna be sad but i'm actually so happy for them🥹 user8 user7 MOOD they're adorable 😍
user9 lando you lucky man 😳
user10 they're both lucky tbh user11 user10 hottest couple ever fr 🥵
user12 ARE YOU FUCKING SEEING THIS CHAT WHATJSNFJKSNDKFFNCN
user13 YESSSSSJSNFKS IM SO HAPPY I WANNA CRY user14 we've waited MONTHS but it was so worth it🥹💗
mclaren QUEEN AND KING 👑💘
user15 admin is one of us, no doubt
user16 last pic it's so cute i can'tttt🥺
user17 lando is really setting a high standard here
user18 FR irinakrausse where did u find this man? asking for a friend user19 i need a lando in my life like rn
irinakrausse alexa play london boy by taylor swift
liked by landonorris
irinakrausse oh and i love u moreeee🥰❤️🔥 user21 CUTEST COUPLE EVER user22 can u two adopt me please?🥺 user23 AND SHE'S A SWIFTIE? irina just became my fav wag 🛐
user24 ok ok but does this mean we'll get more of Irina at the races this year or what?
user25 i mean i hope so irinakrausse you'll have to wait and see (yes) user26 YAY OMFG I CANT WAIT !!!!!!
author's note: hope y'all enjoyed it! would love to know your thoughts <3 btw feel free to leave any request 🤍
#lando norris#lando norris x oc#lando norris x reader#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x you#lando norris f1#lando norris imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 social media au#lando norris fanfic#lando norris fic#f1 fanfiction#f1#formulaone#fanfic#fanfiction#female!reader#mclaren f1#f1 smau
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"actually?" "yeah, actually."
─ in which you accidentally bump (fall) into someone you might know in an indoor climbing gym
"his arms look really meaty..."
modern au! kinich x reader abt 2.1k words!
final part of part 1 this can be read as a standalone!
your user is sparkling toots in this fic
──────────────────────
"I'M DODGING I'M DODGING!!" you yell over the call, hastily pressing multiple keys and moving your mouse quickly. it's been a while since you played with your friend, almightydragonlord, yes, cheesy username. but still, you enjoyed playing with him as he makes everything easier, really, EVERYTHING easier. he helped you with your builds the first time you met him, albeit much to your refusal (felt insulted when his so-called lizard, 'ajaw' called your characters trash) (it was actually ajaw but you refuse to believe how a lizard can somehow spell out the words l o s e r).
anyways!
the only response you can hear from the other side of the call is loud typing, followed by a brief. "mhm" from the almightydragonlord. he's quiet, the only time he really speaks to you is when he's giving you constructive criticism or the rare times he chuckles when you die during boss fights. which you respond by angrily yelling at him.
"toots, behind you." snapping out of your thinking, you quickly dodge the incoming attack hurled behind your character by the boss you both were fighting. with one more quick setup from the almightydragonlord it was instantly over, the huge numbers brought by his characters becoming more and more like a regular sight for you. welp! at least your daily boss fighting is done for the day.
"dragonlord I'm gonna go now! i'll see you later?"
"mhm, see you"
"as curt as ever i see! bye!!"
and with that, you ended the call. pulling off your headphones and doing your daily routine to hang out with one of your friends later in the day.
───
"hi mualani!" you waved enthusiastically to your friend who was at a distance. she also waved back with the signature smile that she boasts.
as you make your way towards her you feel a sense of suspicion by the seemingly mischievous smile on her face.
"guess what we're doing today!"
"what?"
"rock climbing!" mualani says, clapping her hands together eagerly.
"we're going rock climbing?!" you cried, quickly whipping your head to look over at the outfit you wore today, which was clearly not appropriate for some activity. furthermore, you've never rock-climbed before except for that time in elementary in the local playground.
wait.
you did have some experience in rock climbing. maybe you should just rely on your memories from your elementary school days! but that was years ago.. and your outfit might hinder you from movements that are essential for climbing.
"don't worry. i got some extra clothes in the back of my car." mualani winks upon seeing your worried demeanor "also it's indoors! so we won't be climbing on real rocks! haha!" she pats your back reassuringly.
upon hearing that you breath a sigh of relief. "oh thank goodness" you say dramatically clasping your hands together. you knew you'd actually be fried if it really was real rock climbing. after the brief chat you both share you quickly make your way to her car door, quickly sitting down and buckling up before the car starts.
always. remember. to. buckle. up.
was the mantra you always repeated before getting into a car when you were young. nowadays putting on the seatbelt was just muscle memory for you. whenever you get into a car you put on your seatbelt without thinking. a necessary habit honestly.
the ride was short, it only took a few minutes to arrive at the indoor climbing gym. funny enough you saw a car with the plate "drgnlrd" parked near the gym. who the hell names their license plate like that?! it's also the same name as the username your friend online has.
well, it's probably just a coincidence!
as you both head into the gym with no expectations whatsoever you were instantly baffled by the sheer height of the
fake rock climbing thingy?
you don't know what it's called but you do know you'll be able to conquer it. i mean, you weren't called the ruler of the playground for nothing! you were dubbed "sonic" by your peers back in elementary for climbing super fast on the rock climbing part in the local playground near your house.
it's safe to say you might be the best (worst) one in the room!
as you head your way to the changing rooms in the gym you notice a familiar figure high up on the rock.
"his arms look really meaty..."
"what are you looking at? let's go so we can climb sooner!" a voice from behind you quickly snaps you out of your thoughts.
oh my god. why were you even thinking about how some random dude's muscles look tasty?? get a grip!
as the both of you head inside you remember the time when almightydragonlord sent a video of him skydiving. yes skydiving, falling out of a helicopter type of skydiving. the area he was skydiving at looked really familiar too!
wait.
familiar?
as you retrace back to the video he sent you, the feeling of dread forms in the pit of your stomach.
lush green trees, tall hilltops, and the distinctive sight of saurians.
lush green trees...
tall hilltops.
SAURIANS?!
NATIVE TO NATLAN SAURIANS?!
HE LIVES IN NATLAN?!?
BUT YOU LIVE IN NATLAN TOO??
ugh! you even shouldn't be thinking about him when your supposed to be conquering the climbing wall soon!
"ugh.. let's not think about this today..." you grumble, quickly putting on the clothes mualani handed you earlier. as you make your way outside the room mualani is already there waiting for you,
"hi!! ready partner?" she smirks at you, dragging you to the rock wall (which looks even more intimidating close up) that you have to conquer.
gulp.
NO!! you can do this. you weren't called the ruler of the playground for nothing. you can conquer this. maybe think of it as a necessary level to beat! plus you have a harness attached to you right now! so you won't wall to your death if you fall. and! if the harness fails you know who to sue to get money.
with one more final nervous gulp, you start conquering (climbing) the wall. when you look up you already see mualani way ahead of you. oh dear, looks like you have a time limit to this level.
"wait!!" you cried, starting to climb the wall, with ease actually, this was way easier than you thought!
"heh. I might actually be the ruler of the climbing gym now!" as you smirk to yourself you notice some weird white powder on mualani's hands? "mualani, what's that stuff on your hands?" you yell out above, "oh! this is climbing chalk, it helps strengthen the grip of your hands if they usually sweat." she yells back.
sweat
sweat
sweat
you know that feeling when you're suddenly aware of how your hands produce sweat and it sweats right after? yeah, it's sweating right now when you realize your hands have the function to sweat.
"oh uh! that's fun" you reply nervously, the word 'sweat echoing throughout your head, the feeling of your sudoriferous (sweat) glands activating within your hands right now, it isn't mandatory to lather that white stuff when you're climbing, so it should be fine...
right?
yeah no, it's not fine you can feel your hands sweating right now, loosening your grip, BUT,
it's not mandatory to lather that stuff so...
"hellloooo!! up from above! hurry up!" mualani's voice snaps you out of your thoughts once again as you look up in response, "we're almost to the top y'know!" she yells making you realize that you were really high up.
and that makes you sweat even more.
but you prevail! you grab onto the next wall hold, and the next, but the feeling of your grip getting weaker every second was not concerning at all! (lie) but you were almost there! you're about to beat mualani and claim the title of the ruler of the climbing gym!
"watch i'm going to win," you say confidently, but in that moment your grip was already weak, weak enough to make your hand slip.
the last thing you see is mualani's shocked expression, followed by one of relief and confusion..?
...
..
.
a hand quickly snakes around your waist, making sure you don't fall to your inevitable doom.
"you good?"
a familiar voice brushes against your ear, your stomach dropping. a foreign feeling of heat rushing to your face due to embarrassment.
as you look at the person who saved you, you are instantly dumbified.
a beautiful mixture of green and orange meets your eyes, with long, thick, dark lashes that compliment the brightness of his orbs, creating a stark contrast that makes it difficult to look away.
wait.
beautiful amber green eyes with dark fluffy hair.
no way.
is he..?
"almightydragonlord?" you say breathlessly, staring at his face shamelessly.
"oh?" his arm unconsciously tightens around your waist, a look of surprise painting his face with the utterance of his online username. in a few seconds his face begins light up as he realizes your identity, "sparklingtoots?" a subconscious smile making it's way to his features, which in turn causes you to gawk even more at him.
oh dear. that smile is deadly.
"t-thank you?" you say confused, blinded by his smile. gosh, he was cuter in person, instead of falling to your death maybe you'll die by the brightness of that smile instead.
wait.
shouldn't you be falling right now?
you slowly look down at your waist.
a hand.
his hand.
the hand you complimented earlier without realizing it was him.
snaked around your waist to prevent you from falling, the proximity between you two was worse, your left side touching his right, his fingers gripping your waist tightly to secure you onto him, the feeling of his forearm around your stomach firm.
oh archons, he's built too?
"u-um, aren't you tired?! shouldn't you let go?! uh! I have a harness don't worry! and I must be heavy!" you say nervously, the close proximity between you two was not helping your conversational skills whatsoever!
"oh sorry, it was on instinct, I'll let go if you want to" he slowly releases his hold on you, careful to not make you drop unexpectedly.
wait, wait, wait, wait.
you're still really high up! you might actually faint if you start free-falling!
you instantly grab his hand, positioning it back on your waist again. "wait! actually please keep holding on, i think it'll be terrifying once i start swinging down." you look up at him, eyes that basically read, 'please don't drop me or else I might actually pass out.'
"you think i'd drop you without any warnings?" he looks at you confused, his hand keeping a firm grip on you once again to prevent you from falling. "i mean... you're carrying a full-grown person right now, so you might claim that you won't drop me on purpose but i don't know if your hand is gonna agree!" you say worriedly in response.
"don't worry i'm strong." he replies, trying to reassure your worries "do you see my pocket? there's some climbing chalk in it, use your hand to get some."
"uh, which pocket?! the front or back?"
"any."
you hesitantly reach into the front pocket of his pants, grabbing a handful of chalk which you quickly lather all over your hands. "now use one of your hands to grab onto one of the holds closest to you" he instructs, which you quickly follow. as you grab onto a yellow hold and then grab onto another one until you are free from his hold, you realize just how much your grip has improved, that you should've just slathered on some climbing chalk before you started climbing to prevent this whole fiasco from happening...
"thank you! um, almigh-"
"kinich."
"oh! thank you the almighty dragon lord kinich!" you tease. in response, he lets out a brief chuckle that you've always heard on the calls you had together.
"i didn't know you lived in natlan!" you exclaim, slowly making your way down the wall. "i thought you knew?" he replies confused, keeping watch of you to make sure he'll catch you before you fall again. "shhh.. i know you sent me that skydiving video months ago but i just realized until today! also, do you do that stuff often..? i mean... you had no hesitation jumping off the helicopter!" you ask him in curiosity, it's strange! most people would hesitate for a bit before jumping off! but this dude didn't even look worried at all!
"oh yeah, i do a lot of stuff like that, like bungee jumping, mountain climbing, sky di-"
"HUH?!" you look at him in disbelief. is he one of those adrenaline junkies?!
"i know most people are shocked, but I find extreme sports enjoyable." he says, looking at you with a gentle smile.
oh dear, you don't think you'll get used to that smile anytime soon.
as you both make your way down, you learn more about the almightydra- kinich, how his lizard ajaw was really the one who made the nasty comments about your characters (which you still don't believe), and how many extreme sports he does, which was a lot. and mualani also descended down quickly to make sure you were okay! as you near the start of the climbing wall you swear you're gonna kiss the ground once you make it back down.
"oh my archons." you collapse on the floor, heaving a sigh of relief, at least you know now to make sure you have emergency climbing chalk in your pockets... you really should invest in some if you're planning to climb more in the future...
as you are laying down on the strangely comforting gym floor you feel a cold object against your forehead. "are you free after this?" a voice above you says as you look up to see kinich leaning over you, water bottle in hand, pressing it against you. just as you were about to respond you were quickly cut off by another voice above you. "yeah she's free!" mualani chirps above you, giving a thumbs up to kinich which she then looks down to wink at you. "I'll be going now. make sure to tell me everything after," who then looks down to whisper at you, giving you a mischievous grin before walking away.
kinich then drops down beside you, turning his head to face you.
"lunch with me today?" he asks, which in turn you grin, "are you asking out on a date? the almighty dragon lord kinich! asking me out on a date! can you believe it?!" you tease,
"and what if i was?" he responds, his amber-green eyes meeting with yours.
"h-huh? actually?" you say surprised, taken aback by his forwardness. you knew he was curt but you didn't expect it to translate over to real life! "yeah, actually." he stands up, offering his hand to you. you grab his hand as he helps you stand up before facing him.
"also, don't worry, i don't do extreme sports with my car." he flashes you a grin.
──────────────────────
A/N!! OH MY GOSH HELLO EVERYONE. thank u all for the support from part 1, I hope you guys liked this one as much as the previous one!! I tried really hard to not make kinich ooc... (I hope I didn't..) I looked up his lore and stuff and found out he liked doing extreme sports! and the skydiving from the previous one I wrote was pretty unexpected BUT!! akshually (nerd emoji) "As a core member of the Scions of the Canopy tribe, Kinich is fond of extreme sports, and is said by his companion K'uhul Ajaw to have plunged headfirst off a cliff and lived to see it (LIKE!! THATS BASICALLY SKY DIVING!!)" quote the genshin wiki!! anyways I hope you enjoyed reading this.HAVE A GOOD DAY OR NIGHT!!
#kinich x reader#kinich x you#genshin kinich#genshin kinich x reader#genshin fanfic#genshin impact#genshin imagines#genshin impact kinich x reader#k'uhul ajaw#ajaw
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Chapter 70* of the first day of the rest of human Bill Cipher's life—he's back in the Mystery Shack but whether or not he's a prisoner anymore is up in the air, he's proven he knows how to escape, and the Pines have proven they don't want to execute him anymore. For now. How's he gonna celebrate?
With back pain! That's what you get from half a week of running around in the woods ignoring all your body's pain signals.
But at least it can't get worse.
This chapter is book compatible but book spoiler free! The fic won't remain spoiler free, but while I figure out how to incorporate the new info in the fic, we're proceeding with pre-written chapters unaltered.
[*"hey, wasn't this chapter 62 a few days ago?" I renumbered the chapters after the Axolotl arc. If you haven't read the Axolotl arc, go back and read it!]
####
Soos was awakened by Melody as she thrashed and sucked in a gasp like a scream. Groggily, Soos said, "Babe? You okay?"
She rolled over, grabbing for his arms with trembling hands. "Soos—"
"I've got you." He half sat up with a sleepy groan and pulled Melody into his embrace. She pressed her face into his chest with a sigh. As he stroked her hair, her breathing slowly steadied out again.
"M'good," Melody said. "Sorry I woke you."
"Don't worry about it, babe. Always happy to cuddle." He yawned. "Sleep paralysis again?"
"Yeah," Melody sighed.
For as long as Melody could remember, she'd had sleep paralysis nightmares: nights where she'd wake up and find she was unable to move any part of her body but her eyes, and a monster escaped from her worst dreams was lurking in the room. Shadowy figures with glowing eyes, twisted demonic representations of her least favorite teachers, hunched hags with claws extending out of tattered robes—for three years, it had looked like a werewolf-mummy from an old horror movie that terrified her as a child—filling the doorway, or silhouetted in the window, or standing perfectly straight in the corner with neck tilted sideways as though it were broken, or staring hungrily down at her from the ceiling with bulging eyes, or crawling up from the foot of the bed and over her body to grab her throat.
The first time she spent the night with Soos, she'd warned him about her sleep paralysis; but for the past year, she'd never had a nightmare while sleeping in the Mystery Shack. She'd even been completely free of them for several months—something subconsciously reassuring about having her fiancé next to her, probably—until their unwelcome house guest moved in and she'd gone back to sleeping at her aunt's house in town.
And now she was even having them in the shack.
"This is the third time in less than a month," Soos asked. "Same one as usual?"
"Mhm."
"I couldn't protect you this time," Soos said mournfully. "I have failed you as your knight in shining armor... Maybe I need shining armor. Do you think they make like, shiny silver spandex pajamas?"
Melody laughed. "Soos, you goofball." She hugged him tighter. "It's fine. I always get sleep paralysis more when I'm stressed. And the situation in the shack's been... well..."
"Yeah," Soos sighed. "I know." She didn't need to tell him what part of "the situation" was stressing her out.
For the past year, ever since Weirdmageddon—which she'd been just unlucky enough to catch live on a weekend trip to visit Soos—her sleep paralysis demon had looked like Bill Cipher.
She'd told Soos this last fall, and in a panic he'd told her that Bill was a dream-invading demon; and for a moment they'd feared this meant Bill had found a way back. But no—according to Soos, Bill was a real chatterbox, and he was always doing something if he invaded your dreams. The thing Melody saw acted like any of her other nightmares: creepy. Standing on too-long legs at the end of the bed; giving off sickly yellow light she could see through her eyelids; staring at her with one bloodshot eye; crawling onto her chest with claws like gnarled black branches. It was just an unlucky coincidence that the real Bill had been a dream demon, and just an unlucky coincidence that being petrified by an eye-bat felt so much like sleep paralysis.
Ironically, now she had confirmation that her nightmares didn't mean Bill was back—because, when Bill did come back, her nightmares hadn't changed.
"My subconscious just hasn't caught up to the fact that you guys finally executed him," Melody said, getting comfortable to go back to sleep. "The good news is, the real Bill's gone and we never need to worry about that again."
"Oh," Soos said. "Um. By the way. The craziest thing happened at like one in the morning."
####
Bill was creeping upstairs to bed when he heard Melody shout, "He's WHAT?!"
He had to clap a hand over his mouth to keep from bursting out giggling.
####
Bill was getting better at using his other eyes in his sleep, even when he hadn't chemically connected himself to them. His range wasn't very far yet. From inside the shack, all he could feel was his hoodie, his new necklace, a handful of drawings Mabel had done, and four blankets of his zodiac wheel: two in the kids' room, one in Soos's, and one in the dark.
Around eight in the morning, Mabel was still sleeping comfortably and Dipper was staring at the ceiling worrying; all was right with the world. He only glanced into Soos's room long enough to overhear Melody, "—I'm not mad at you, I'm just mad about the whole situation. I mean, I'll adjust, but still—" before moving on, uninterested in listening to a cutesy couple reassuring each other.
The fourth blanket was in some tight dark container—leather?—but he could hear a muffled voice: "If Bill's staying here on a long term basis, we need to renegotiate... almost everything about his captivity." That was Ford. It was gratifying to know that even when Bill was asleep, the whole household was thinking about him.
"Yeah, you're right," Stan sighed. "We can't just let him keep sleeping on a couple of cushions. We haven't been able to use that couch all summer." There was the sound of a zipper and the lid over the zodiac blanket swung up, revealing Stan standing above.
Ford said, "And trying to get him to sleep in the living room is a lost cause. He says he needs to sleep in a room where he can see the stars."
A guilty look crossed Stan's face. "Right. That's probably it." He pushed the zodiac blanket aside, pulled out a t-shirt, and shut the suitcase again. "We could get—I don't know—an inflatable mattress or something..."
"There's an unused mattress in the basement, isn't there? Maybe we could haul it up." (It wasn't a terribly comfortable mattress. But Bill supposed they only wanted to give him the bare minimum so they could get their precious couch cushions back.)
"I'll ask Soos about it," Stan said. "Well, let's get this over with."
That was Bill's cue to wake up. He'd like to look alert when they came for him. Negotiations ought to go in his favor; he could still threaten suicide if their terms felt too restrictive—or even just threaten to escape, he could do that now if he didn't like their terms!—but they couldn't threaten to kill him anymore. He wondered if he could get phone privileges...
He opened his eyes. He was laying on his left side, the window at his back. He tried to push himself upright.
Sharp pain exploded in the left side of his back. He gasped, collapsing on his side. The pain clawed over his left shoulder, inside his arm, up his neck, across to his right shoulder blade, down nearly to his hips. His entire body tensed around the pain.
He let out a weak, wheezy laugh. (He could feel his ribcage contracting as he exhaled.) That was truly exquisite pain.
All right. He shouldn't be surprised by this. He'd spent four of the last five days tromping through forests and mountains and three of the last five nights getting next to no sleep, including two nights in a thin sleeping bag. The last couple of days, he'd hiked all over creation carrying two fully-loaded backpacks, in a body that had gotten next to no exercise for the past month and probably hadn't been designed for hiking in the first place. And on top of all that, first he'd thought the Axolotl was coming to arrest him and then that the Pines were going to kill him—and human bodies handled emotional stress very poorly. Not to mention whatever the heck had happened when three-fourths of his body had simply stopped working for an hour.
He'd ached for days. He'd simply kept pushing himself through it all, because this stupid weak human body didn't get the luxury of rest when Bill's life and death were on the line.
Apparently, that was all the pushing it could take. Now he felt like someone had shoved a knife in his back and twisted the muscles up around the blade like twirling a forkful of spaghetti. (Oh, that sounded delicious. One more brilliant idea to implement when he restarted Weirdmageddon: spinal muscle spaghetti. Freshly grated parmesan, maybe a little pesto.)
It was difficult even to breathe—that little motion was enough to make his back muscles squeal in pain. He had to carefully move his hips and right arm in tiny motions to let him roll onto his back while roiling up his pained muscles as little as possible; and then he just as carefully rolled onto his right side, his back to the room. The human body was such a fascinatingly complex interconnected thing, crisscrossed with puppet strings that all tugged each other; no matter what part of his body he moved, somehow it managed to yank on something in his upper left back. He curled his left arm against his chest and squeezed his elbow with his right arm, trying to find a way to tense the rest of his body that reduced the tension on his back.
He heard the door to Mabel and Dipper's room open. For lack of a better plan, he shut his eyes and tried to look natural as they passed him on the way to the stairs. Like heck was he about to let the kids know he was in pain, much less ask them for help. He doubted he was severely injured—he combed through his knowledge of human anatomy—probably just a muscle spasm. It would reduce in a few hours; and then he could make his way downstairs and figure out how to convince someone to get him an ice pack out of the freezer without betraying that anything was wrong. For now, he just had to lay down, try to find a position that didn't stab into his revolting muscles, and wait...
Downstairs, Stan bellowed, "Hey, demon! Get down here!"
Right. What were the odds Bill could make it downstairs and fake that he wasn't in agonizing pain in front of the Pines family? Could he suppress those winces convincingly? He tried to sit up.
And immediately fell to his side again with a gasp. In spite of his breathtakingly self-destructive willpower, he physically couldn't force himself to sit upright. Why not! What was the point?! He didn't mind the pain half as much as his body did, and he thought he should be the one in control here!
Stan hollered, "BILL!"
His voice cracked, "Later!" Ugh. Good thing he'd gotten in his dramatic return last night. He suspected that was the last time he'd look cool for a while.
####
Soos was just emerging from the bedroom when he heard Stan shouting, "I said get down here, Cipher!"
There was a long pause before the reply came from upstairs: "Can't!"
"I WASN'T ASKING!"
"ME NEITHER."
Something was up. Bill always talked a little too hard—not always loud, but hard—as though he were trying to carry on a regular conversation over a strong wind; but Soos thought something about his voice seemed even more forced today. Almost strained.
Soos heard Stan and Ford talking quietly as they headed up the stairs—"...sounds off, do you think he's injured?" "I can't imagine how, if he'd been up this morning we would have heard him banging around..."—and he followed them up.
At the top of the stairs, Stan demanded, "Well? What's wrong with you?"
"Nothing's wrong with me." Bill was curled up on his usual cushion bed. He didn't even turn to look at them. "Just—let me sleep in. Am I not allowed to sleep in? It's not like I have a job." Now that he wasn't straining to shout, his voice sounded even more pained—barely more than a tight whisper.
"All right, fine. Nothing's wrong with you," Ford said. "Then what's wrong with your body?"
Bill chuckled weakly in defeat. "Back's in too much agony to do its job, so I'm giving it the day off."
"Oh, dude," Soos said sympathetically. "Back pain is the worst. One time, I messed up my back after carrying a bunch of boxes between the museum and the attic? Yeah, it was pretty bad for like, a day. I was kinda crying, because it hurt, but also because I had to miss work, and I felt awful about it—but then I remembered the Mystery Shack was closed that day, and I wasn't missing work. So I went to sleep."
Stan and Ford stared expectantly at Soos.
"That's it, that's my whole anecdote."
"Riveting," Bill said flatly. "Did you invite everyone up here to stare at me?" With great difficulty, he pulled his bedsheet up over his head, leaving only a pile of golden curls visible. "Anyway. I'd love to come downstairs—really, I'm famished—buuut my back won't cooperate, and I can't tell you how furious I am about laying on the ground like an idiot at the feet of three of my captors, so if. you. all. would. leave. Please." The "please" came out sounding like the final word of a hex.
Soos winced. Oh, yeah, he supposed being stuck on the floor in front of a bunch of guys you didn't like was pretty embarrassing. He looked toward the stairs and shifted his feet, waiting for the Stans to make a move that direction.
But instead they huddled up to discuss. Stan muttered, "Think he's faking?"
"Why would he?" Soos asked.
Ford murmured, "Soos is right—unless he's that desperate to sleep in, I can't think of a reason he'd lie. He had some... muscular issues after the eclipse—and who knows what he's been up to the last couple of days..." Ford raised his voice, "This isn't the same thing as after the eclipse—?"
"No, just garden variety human back pain," Bill said quickly. "I assume it's garden variety. I've never had back pain before."
"Can you tell what muscles it is?"
"Ugh." Bill let out a shaky sigh. "Pain's... generalized, but... top suspect is the latissimus dorsi. Next guess is the erector spinae group."
"What," Stan said.
Ford nodded like he knew what Bill was talking about. Which he probably did, Soos figured. Doctor and all. "Probably not a severe injury, then. It likely just needs rest—"
Irritably, Bill snapped, "Like I said."
"Great," Stan said. "Then I don't care anymore." He headed downstairs. "Lemme know when the demon can walk again."
Soos and Ford exchanged an awkward look, silently debating whether to follow suite. Ford turned to Bill and cleared his throat. "What do you want for breakfast."
Bill groaned and muttered, "Probably can't use utensils. Whatever, just—bacon and toast and the strongest painkillers in the house."
"All right." Ford headed downstairs.
That struck Soos as inadequate. Trailing after Ford, he said, "Dude, Bill's in so much pain he can't even sit up. Shouldn't we offer to call a doctor or something?"
Ford said, "Knowing Bill, he'd rather die."
Soos considered that. "I'm gonna offer it anyway." He backtracked enough to get his head above the attic floor. "Hey Bill, do you want us to call a doctor or something?"
"I'd rather die."
"Haha, okay! Welp, glad I checked."
But as he headed down to the kitchen, something about the situation still bothered Soos.
Ford was already laying out bacon in a frying pan. "Soos, could you get the painkillers?" he asked. "We should probably give him individual pills rather than the whole bottle. When he got his hands on the cold medicine, he used it to get crossfaded with cider and to drug a wild animal."
Soos winced. Ouch, was that the cold medicine he'd given Bill? (He wondered when Ford had learned the phrase "crossfaded.")
"Hey... didn't Bill say he was famished?" Soos asked. "Is it kinda weird he's just asking for bacon and toast?"
It took Ford a long moment to answer. He didn't look up from the bacon. "I... suppose he's too proud to ask for anything more complicated."
"Why wait for him to ask, then? Just make him some more stuff anyway?"
Ford shook his head. "He'd be insulted."
Ford had been right about Bill's reactions so far, but— "Okay, fine. Then I'll bring it upstairs and insult him. He'll be insulted and fed. What do you think he'll eat?"
Ford glanced at Soos. Soos thought the look was grateful.
####
Apparently, Bill's age looked a little bit different to everybody. Soos had first found out when Abuelita mentioned that Bill looked like one of those ladies she saw at bingo night who were clearly 60-something, but had had a little too much work done—makeup, facial injections, hair dye. The sort who never really looked younger, but rather just gave off the impression that they were terrified of looking older.
So Soos had asked Mabel, and she said that Bill looked like he was in his mid-20s—about Soos's age, maybe a little older. He'd asked Dipper, and Dipper said he had no idea—to him, Bill never really looked quite convincingly human, more like an alien wearing a human rubber mask—but if he had to take a guess at the age the rubber mask was supposed to portray... like, middle-age-ish? Parent-middle-age-ish? Maybe 40-something? 40-something. Melody had had a hard time as well, but eventually settled on early 30s—the age you imagined a snotty Silicon Valley startup CEO would be.
Which was all very fascinating to Soos.
Because to him, Bill looked eighteen. Exactly eighteen.
At 23, Soos was just reaching the age where 18-year-olds stopped looking like peers and started looking like babies. Eighteen was "you know this is what an adult looks like, but it takes you by surprise almost every time" age. Eighteen was "you wouldn't be surprised to see this face behind a counter working as a barista, but you'd be a little alarmed if you overheard them talking about paying rent" age. Eighteen was "they can be all alone in the world making their own decisions and it's technically okay, but if they are, then someone failed them" age.
To him, Bill looked like somebody who'd been flung callously out into the world before his time—unprepared, overwhelmed, and alone.
Soos knew Bill was older than the whole universe or whatever. He knew that Bill was the guy who'd tried to take over the Earth. But he wasn't that guy now. Look at him. He shouldn't have been worried about imprisonment or world domination or getting executed. He should have been making pocket change working at the mall food court over summer break and playing Dancy Pants Revolution at the arcade with other recent high school grads and making puppy eyes at all the small business owners in town until somebody offered him a minimum-wage full-time job and sneaking into the movie theater on Saturday mornings.
Soos was finding it more and more impossible to see Bill as the enemy, much less as some incomprehensible alien. He had cousins who looked like Bill. Slap a pair of sunglasses over his freaky eyes and try to ignore that his body proportions were just a bit unnatural, and he could blend right into a Ramirez family portrait. Just another post-high-school pre-college kid in the middle of the transition from skinny teen to fat adult that most Ramirez women went through by 30. His neon yellow hair would fit right in beside Reggie's little sister's current neon red dye job.
From the moment Bill temporally poofed into the Mystery Shack on June 1 with a Pony Heist bedsheet toga and an ineffective vengeance plot, he'd been going through the physical and emotional wringer. Soos got it, of course Bill was having a bad time, he was a prisoner because he was a danger to the whole universe. And being human for the first time was probably tough. One time Soos was stuck in a pig's body and that was rough, and it was only for one day and at least Soos had still been a mammal. It was probably inevitable that Bill was having a bad time.
But it bothered Soos, seeing somebody in his house who was so miserable. And it bothered him that no one else seemed very bothered.
He loved the Pines family—he'd reverse-adopted Stan as his dad and he'd give his life for any one of them—but part of him had to wonder whether they'd be more bothered by witnessing the hell Bill was going through if he looked like he could be part of their family.
####
"Hey dawg!" Soos hefted up the tray as he entered the attic. "Breakfast!"
Bill was still buried under his bedsheet. "Stanford couldn't be bothered to come up himself?"
"I wanted to bring it!"
Bill grumbled something inaudible. He'd made no secret of the fact that he disdained Soos, although Soos had no idea why. When a human looked down on Soos, he had a couple guesses; but he didn't know what an alien could judge him for. Was it the British dog man nightmare? Was Bill insulted by Soos's 10th grade geometry grades?
But Bill didn't protest, so Soos scooted around his makeshift bed to set the tray down on the floor in front of him. "Uh... feel better, dude. Hey, you know—if sleeping on the floor is hurting your back, the fold-out sofa in the living room is still totally available. Just, in case you wanna—"
"Not interested," Bill said. "Buzz off, Questiony."
"Okay." He'd offered.
Soos was almost back to the stairs when Bill said, "What is all this stuff?"
"It's breakfast!" The tray included bacon, a toasted sandwich, a drink with one of those straw that bent in the middle so Bill didn't have to sit up all the way up to drink it, a pre-opened chip bag, and a pre-opened pill bottle. (Soos had elected to ignore Ford's advice that they mete out painkillers one pill at a time. If they gave Bill individual pills, he'd have to ask for more when they wore off, and Soos suspected he'd rather choose to suffer.)
"I didn't ask for this."
"Well, I thought you might want some other stuff."
"I don't."
Surprise! Bill was insulted. Soos didn't understand how he could be insulted by some extra food for breakfast—he's still gotten his bacon and toast—but all right, fine, Soos had been warned. "Oh, okay. Just don't eat anything you don't want."
Bill grunted in response.
As Soos started down the stairs, Bill said, "Hey, Questiony. If Mabel asks where I am, just tell her I woke up for breakfast then decided to sleep in."
Aww, he didn't want her to worry. "What about if Dipper asks?"
"Tell him to mind his own business."
"Heh. You got it, dude." Soos headed back to the kitchen—still bothered.
####
Yesterday, Soos and Melody had made plans to take advantage of the Mystery Shack being closed for the day to make breakfast together, the way they used to during the off season. But today, Melody had said that, now that Bill was alive again, she wasn't comfortable eating in the shack, and she'd gone to her aunt's house. She'd said she wasn't mad at Soos, and he believed her—he'd played no part in Bill's continued survival—but still. It kinda felt like she was mad at Soos.
So Soos was eating brunch by himself in the kitchen when Bill gingerly eased himself downstairs—leaning to one side, wincing in pain, one eye squeezed shut, and supporting himself on his broken umbrella; but, mobile again. He ducked into the living room where Stan and Ford were watching TV and, from what Soos had overheard, planning what to do with the rest of their summer. "Okay, I'm here," Bill said. "Negotiations?"
"Hey—no weapons," Stan said. "Hand over the umbrella."
"What! You let me keep it last night."
"Yeah, when it was raining and we were tired. I don't see any rain inside the house."
"Hey, Mr. Pines?" Soos leaned out of the kitchen. "Bill was just using the umbrella to walk? Maybe we could let him keep this one?"
Bill shot Soos a dirty look, face flushed. (What was that for!)
Stan paused, and turned to Ford for a verdict. Ford pressed his lips together, looked away, and muttered, "Well, if he's using it for legitimate purposes."
Bill stared at Ford, brows raised in amazement. "Wait, wait—I'm allowed to have it now?"
"Yes?" Ford said. "I mean—If you're using it to walk, why wouldn't you be?"
"Why wouldn't I—?!" Bill laughed in disbelief. "'No weapons, Bill!' 'No weapons, Bill!' Ev-ry sin-gle time! No canes, no umbrellas, no brooms, no baseball bats, no GOLF CLUBS, no STICKS, no CURTAIN RODS—"
"Oh come on!" Stan spread his hands defensively. "Some of those can obviously be used as weapons—!"
"I wouldn't have needed a baseball bat if you hadn't already taken my cane!"
"You tried to brain Soos with a cane on your first day."
Bill shot another dirty look at Soos.
Soos said apologetically, "That did objectively happen."
Bill rolled his open eye and glowered at Stan again. "What, so because of that I'm not allowed to walk?"
"I," Stan said. "That." He turned to Ford again for help.
Ford said, "If we'd known you needed a cane—"
"I fall down the stairs twice a day!"
"Well," Ford said.
"You use me falling to tell when I'm up in the morning!"
"Ah."
"Did it not occur to you! That this was a problem! That I was trying to solve!"
"I see your point."
Why didn't he just say something, Soos wondered; followed by, what, the guy who refused to explain why he was stuck laying on the floor until we dragged it out of him?
"Well, you've got an umbrella now," Stan said. "Happy?"
"Elated," Bill said sourly. He perched on the armrest of the sofa, visibly wincing as he crossed his legs and found the right position to balance himself. (Soos noted that, since Stan and Ford were already occupying both armchairs and the sofa's seat cushions were in the attic, Bill didn't have any cushioned place to sit. With back pain, no less.) "Let's get this over with."
The crux of the negotiations was that, when Bill and the Pines had initially agreed on the terms of his imprisonment, they'd only been meant to be sufficient enough to last until either the Pines figured out how to kill him or Bill figured out how to escape. Now that both had happened and it looked like Bill would be staying here longer than planned, they supposed they needed something more sustainable.
Bill requested door rights back. Stan and Ford nixed that immediately; they didn't trust him with that kind of freedom.
"Fine, then at least let me go outside. I want fresh air, blue skies, and a social life! I'm an extrovert, I'm losing even more of my mind in here."
Stan and Ford exchanged a look. "Yeah," Stan said grudgingly. "He's more or less in solitary in here. Even for him, that's harsh." (A ghost of a triumphant smirk flickered across Bill's face and disappeared.)
Ford considered that with an unconvinced grimace; but he said, "I suppose... you can make occasional trips outside the shack for... mental health purposes. Under adequate supervision."
"Finally," Bill sighed. "So what's 'adequate' supervision?"
That was where negotiations broke down. Stan and Ford did not think that Mabel alone was adequate supervision for the villainous Bill Cipher, and Wendy was just barely sufficient for Rainbow Club nights but he couldn't be trusted alone with her outside that; Bill, on the other hand, objected strenuously to the suggestion that he could only go outside with somebody who hated and/or distrusted him—which described everyone in the shack except Wendy and Mabel—because that would just make going outside miserable.
They couldn't agree on what kinds of things Bill would be allowed to do, either. They didn't like the idea of him hanging out with Rainbow Club members outside of club meetings, or going with Abuelita to bingo, or visiting a bar in town—all of those would give him too many opportunities to manipulate people with minimal oversight.
"Okay," Bill said irritably, "so are there any social activities I am allowed to participate in! Since it sounds like socialization itself is off limits—!"
Soos decided to make himself scarce before things got any more heated. Maybe he'd go upstairs to retrieve the tray from breakfast.
####
The bacon and drink had been consumed; the bendy straw had been tied in a double loop; the pill bottle was alarmingly light; the sandwich had been picked at, before Bill elected to eat the toast around it and leave the filling behind on the plate; and the potato chip bag had been flung across the room, crushed chips left in its wake, in some sort of protest against receiving unasked-for food. Okay. So Bill was really insulted, then.
Eh, Soos should probably clean up here anyway. He took pride in keeping the Mystery Shack clean, but he hadn't had a chance to thoroughly clean the attic since Bill and the kids moved in for the summer. And it looked like the projectile potato chips weren't the only junk food trash that had accumulated. He saw empty chip bags, candy wrappers, peanut butter jars, jerky packets, cider cans... a lot of cider cans...
He went downstairs, got a broom, a trash bag, and a vacuum, and got to work.
As Soos worked his way across the floor sucking up potato chips, he quietly sang to himself, "Am I cleanin'? Girl, I'm cleanin'. I vacuum in the attic. 'Are you cleanin'?' Yeah, I'm cleanin'. I vacuum in the..." He picked up the couch cushions to vacuum under them—he still wondered why Bill preferred to sleep on the cushions rather than the sofa bed downstairs. Maybe he got scared of the dark and liked to sleep by a window? That would make sense. Since Bill used to glow when he was a triangle, he probably wasn't used to the dark. Or maybe he just thought the attic was cooler than the living room.
Soos almost set the cushions back on the ground, noticed bloodstains on one, and froze. He'd seen Bill with a lot of little injuries, but had he seen any cuts that big? The blood didn't look fresh. They'd at least been here long enough for Bill to hide them on the underside of the cushion. Soos looked around wildly for any clues about how or why or when, uneasily decided that since they were dry and Bill wasn't dead he didn't need to worry about it, and pulled out the upholstery attachment to give the stain a halfhearted vacuuming before putting the cushions back in place. What the heck was happening in this attic?
Soos scooped up the mostly yellow and black clothes sitting at the foot of the cushion-bed—they were outside Bill's cardboard box "dresser," he figured that meant they were dirty—wrapped them in Bill's Pony Heist sheet, and tossed the bundle toward the staircase. They flew down to the landing without hitting the stairs. "Yes! Three points! No net!" Soos pumped his fist.
He cleaned the window seat's cushion with the upholstery attachment, picked it up to clean underneath—and the cushion was really heavy on one side. He felt that side of the cushion; there was something hard and brick-ish inside. He caught a flash of white along one edge. The cushion's stuffing was coming out of a tear in the seam. Soos reached inside.
His jaw dropped. "No way. How did he...?"
Soos had pulled out two stubby crayons and the long-lost Journal 4.
####
(If you got this far thank you for taking a break from the fandom-wide riots over the book in order to read my fic. (I'm assuming there's fandom-wide riots, I'm queuing this Monday night so that I don't have to worry about it for the rest of the week.) Anyway, I'd love to hear what y'all think about our first Soos-focused plot arc!
And as promised, now that the book's out, I'll be getting to work crossposting the fic to Ao3 soon-ish. I don't know when yet, since I'm writing to y'all from the past, but soon.)
#bill cipher#human bill cipher#soos ramirez#gravity falls#gravity falls fic#gravity falls fanart#fanart#my art#my writing#bill goldilocks cipher#(Dec 12 edit: chapter has been renumbered)
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𝕊𝕙𝕚𝕗𝕥 ℍ𝕒𝕡𝕡𝕖𝕟𝕤
Oscar Piastri x Horner!Reader Miami and Imola bring new challenges to the grid. Challenges such as finally initiating the romance part of your potential relationship- oh and being on the podium with your ex-teammate too.
Warnings: swearing ig? idk my usual warnings apply (ALSO REALLY BAD TEXT MESSAGE EDITING LMAOOO)
you're crazy if you can see dates on the tweets (/hj)
series masterlist | previous part | next part
MiamiGP
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redbullracing #MiamiGP the RBR Admin is in love with you 😍
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gerihalliwellhorner I'm convinced that Miami loves you too, Darling 🥰🥰 -> redbullracing please don't embarrass me while i'm working, Mum!! -> gerihalliwellhorner Oh you do that well enough on your own
user4599 Thank you for feeding us with all the #OP81 content we could need 🫡🫡 -> redbullracing ofc! I have to use my power for something right??
maxverstappen1 This is Max Verstappen erasure 😒😒 -> redbullracing anyone ever tell you you're a massive baby?? -> maxverstappen1 not to my face, why? did you hear something? -> redbullracing only thing I can hear is you whining
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redbullracing Here's Max ig 😒 (shoutout to victoriaverstappen for giving permission for me to post Luka. u a real one fr)
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victoriaverstappen Always happy to give you posting privilege 🫶 -> redbullracing Admin is in love with you 😳🫶
maxverstappen1 thanks 😑 -> redbullracing yw 🥰😊
oscarpiastri Luka is clearly the best Verstappen out there -> redbullracing right?! the only one that comes close is his mother fr -> victoriaverstappen what a coincidence haha, Luka says you're his favourite rb driver 🤭 -> maxverstappen1 I'm still his favourite uncle tho right?? -> victoriaverstappen welllllll....... -> victoriaverstappen "Who's your favourite uncle, Luka?" "UNCLE OSCAR!!" -> maxverstappen1 ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!
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3 days later
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yn.horner Everybody welcome the newest #PaddockPet ✨ Honey-Lemon 🍯🍋 (go follow her account misshoney.lemon 🤭)
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oscarpiastri was gonna say something clever, but Honey-Lemon is just too cute for me to think -> yn.horner she has that effect on cute boys -> oscarpiastri does said cute boy have an effect on Honey's cute mum? -> yn.horner maybe 🤭 -> user3216 chat is this real? -> user8569 1st of all: excuse me? 2nd of all: EXCUSE ME?! -> user 4568 ooooo i am SO HERE FOR THIS
user5421 OH MY GOD SHE'S ADORABLE
user2268 following Honey-Lemon's acc RIGHT NOW -> misshoney.lemon You're a 🍬🫀 (get it? sweet-heart??) -> user4568 we've only had Honey-Lemon for 10mins but if anything happened to her I would k-ll everyone and then myself
ImolaGP
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redbullracing In honour of #Lestappen + Oscar on the podium (again), here are some pictures of Admin's favourite F1 drivers past and present :D tagged: maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri, charles_leclerc, nicorosberg, kimimatiasraikkonen, sebastianvettel
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user6548 Admin must have a thing for cunty drivers ->redbullracing 👁️🫦👁️💅💅 -> user6548 you and me are the same
nicorosberg I'm flattered 🤭 -> redbullracing Love you King 🫶🫶
oscarpiastri Why couldn't you pick a cunty pic of me too? -> redbullracing listen man, sometimes the fans don't deserve the fan service y'know?? -> user5589 DOES THIS MEAN ADMIN HAS CUNTY OSCAR PICS???!!?!? -> redbullracing ADMIN HAS THEM AND IS HOLDING THEM HOSTAGE
sebastianvettel I'll reply for both Kimi and myself. -> sebastianvettel I'm honoured to be considered one of your favourites :) -> redbullracing ok that was you, what's kimi's reply?? -> sebastianvettel 👍👍 -> redbullracing idk why i expected any different
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Here we go, as promised!
(not even joking, planning this and having people ask abt writing for others in f1 has given me so much motivation, this is great)
#formula 1 x you#f1 x reader#f1 fluff#formula one#formula 1#oscar piastri smau#oscar piastri fanfic#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x you#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#redbull!oscar piastri#red bull racing#red bull f1#red bull team#oscar piastri#oscar piastri fluff#op81#op81 x reader#op81 x you#op81 imagine#op81 fanfic#op81 fluff#Aussies Belong In Navy
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try again || ln4
summary: you and lando meet after many years with lots to talk about... warnings: none? i think? a/n: my first lando fic got over 650 notes (INSANE), so here's another, longer, as a thank you!
you weren't a big fan of racing. in fact, you had no clue what it was really about, until your brother brought you here.
the paddock is loud, way too loud for your liking, and you don't really understand. you see people wearing merch, carrying around signs and cutouts with big smiles on their faces, and it's actually kind of cute.
your brother gets into a passionate conversation about a championship with a fellow fan and decides to completely ignore your existence. how typical of him. your eyes wander to the big screen on your left.
names and pictures flash before your eyes, but none of them sound familiar. max verstappen, charlec leclerc, oscar piastri, lando norris.
lando norris.
lando norris?
lando norris, your highschool sweetheart? no, that can't be. surely, it's just a guy with the same name. and the same face. and the same fucking curls. just a coincidence.
your thoughts begin to wander, and suddenly you're in highschool again, anxiously waiting for lando in the park, on your bench. but lando's not in sight. not a single trace of him, he didn't even text you that he's busy like he usually does. you left the park two hours later, tears streaming down your face, betrayal stinging inside your chest.
and it starts stinging again. your first ever love, your first ever heartbreak.
you never thought you'd feel like this on a random sunday in miami, and it's overwhelming, it's all too much and you need to go.
your brother turns back to you. "hey, where are you going?"
it feels stupid to tell him about lando and whatever feelings you're feeling right now, so you just sit back down. "nothing, nothing,"
you manage to zone out for a while, only coming back to your senses when the lights go out, the race starts and your brother screams in excitement.
the crowd goes insane every time a car passes them, making the whole place even louder, and to be completely honest, it's actually kinda fun to watch those cars go ridiculously fast.
as the race comes to an end, the fans get louder, specifically the ones dressed in orange and your brother stands up, cheering passionately.
"and lando norris wins the miami grand prix, for the first time in formula on-"
jesus christ. you just witnessed your first love win a fucking formula one race with your own eyes.
you watch the screen, seeing lando on the podium, looking so happy and relieved, and all of a sudden, you see the same kid you loved those years ago and it's way too much to fucking handle. you get up again.
"i'm gonna go pee," you tell your brother, attempting to leave as quietly as possible, making your way through the crowd.
hell, you don't even know where the toilets are. you just need to get out of there real quick.
and you run, you run until you don't know where you are, but you're standing next to a bunch of guys in orange, breathing heavily.
you feel tears streaming down your cheeks and you hide your face, trying to find a bathroom. those orange guys definitely have a bathroom there, right?
and now, you're completely lost, messy and lando norris is in front of your eyes, chatting with someone. you need to get out.
you wait for a while until everyone turns around and run out of there as quickly as you can and-
something taps on your shoulder, and when you turn around, it's him. you're not sure whether you should cry or laugh.
your eyes meet and it's awkward as hell, just like back in highschool.
"didn't think i'd see you again," he says quietly after a minute of just staring. his voice is a little wobbly.
"i wish you didn't," you reply softly, turning back around to make your way back, but he stops you again. he stays quiet.
"congratulations," you say when he doesn't reply, and you mean it. no bad feelings, just like your mum always told you. "you did well,"
lando's hand on your shoulder tightens and he bites his lip, as if he was trying to find the right words.
"i'm sorry." he eventually whispers, voice breaking in the middle, and your heart fucking breaks at the sight, as angry as you are. "i-i'm gonna explain, alright? i'll tell you everything, please,"
you nod in agreement. today just can't get crazier.
he gently leads you somewhere, and you feel your survival instinct kick in, but it's lando. it's always been him.
he closes the door behind you when you sit on the couch in his driver's room. your hands shake.
"go on then," you begin, "explain,"
he takes a deep breath. "listen, i didn't really have a choice. i had to leave, you know? to move up the ladder, and i dropped out, because i wanted to chase this dream," he says, eyes wandering over your face. "and then - then it started being more than a dream, and i left everyone behind, not just you, and i'm so fucking sorry,"
you tense. "you could've at least texted me,"
"and what was i supposed to text you? that i'm leaving the country to become a racing driver and that i'm gonna be living in monaco and flying around the world and might never see you again?"
"anything. you don't even know how i felt after you ditched me," you reply, bitterness coating the sentence.
"i didn't want to ditch you,"
"but you did, lando, and it fucking hurt!" you raise your voice a little, but it's shaky and unstable. lando reaches for your hand.
"i'm sorry, i really am," he whispers, "i thought about you every day, how you're doing, because i loved you. i loved you so fucking much, i wanted you to just forget my dumb ass,"
"i didn't forget," you say, hand brushing against his. "i thought you didn't want me anymore,"
the room goes silent and you can hear each other's breathing.
"i still love you. i never really stopped," you blurt out, not even realizing what you've just said until he pulls you into a much needed hug, whispering a "me too," in your ear.
you pull away, looking into his eyes. he smiles, and it's the most beautiful thing you've ever seen.
"you think we could try again?"
#f1#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#formula 1#formula one#formula 1 x reader#f1 imagine#lando norris#lando norris fluff#lando x reader#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine
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"Daddy can you pass me the salt?"
. ◠ . ◠ . ◠ . ◠. ◠ . ◠ . ◠ . ◠.
Pairings: Carlos Sainz x Wife!Reader
Summary: In which Y/N tries out the "Daddy can you pass me the salt?" trend during dinner with your family and your husband Carlos
Words: 647
Proofread!!
A/N: another one shot for u guys ꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡
Everyday and every scroll you make on TikTok, that trend always popped up. The "daddy can pass me the salt?" where girls would do the trend on their father and their boyfriend or husband. The reactions were always funny, you wondered how your father would react.
That's why when you had a dinner scheduled with your family and your husband this weekend, you didn't hesitate to not try it out.
 ̄ ̄
The dinner was going great and to your surprise and to a big coincidence well you like to think it's a coincidence. The salt was next to your father as you guys ate. You were sat next to your husband, across from you was your mother and your brother. And your father, which was in the middle front of the table with the salt next to his plate.
You decided it was time to try it out, you may regret it but life's full of it so why not? You said to yourself. Taking a deep breath you say the words "Daddy can you pass me the salt?"
Carlos didn't think much of the situation, his hand stretching to grab the salt as his hand met with your father who was gonna reach the salt out for you too.
You weren't joking when Carlos had dead ass fear in his eyes. He quickly took his hand out, putting it on his hands as he rubs it on his lap.
Chuckling nervously and stuttering while your father looks at him. "i- Sir- i-" he stutters, he couldn't even finish his words.
Your brother laughed at the situation, your mother couldn't help but laugh too. "Which daddy?" Your brother snickers eventually bursting into laughed
You glare at him, chuckling nervously as your gaze shifts back to your father.
His eyebrows raised, a small smile pursing his lips. "Daddy-" Before you could finish your sentence you were cut off by your father.
"What? No I'm not your daddy, you need salt right? Yeah ask your daddy" he chuckles, his eyebrows still raised as he looks at Carlos.
"Dad-" again, you were cut off. Was it right you did the trend? Your thought to yourself, you wish you had recorded it for memory.
"Y/N." Your father says sternly, looking at you and Carlos while he wipes his mouth with a napkin.
You sigh, in defeat. When your father called you by your first name you knew he was serious. You pout, turning your head to face Carlos as you take a deep breath. "daddy... can you pass me the salt please?" You say in a low voice, clearly embarrassed from the situation.
Your father chuckles at you while he watches the situation unfold. Boy did your mother and brother find it amusing.
Carlos chuckles, despite him being embarrassed he was amused as well. He looks at your father, giving him a nod as he reaches his hand to grab the salt and passing it to you with a sweet smile.
You look down, taking the salt and you mumble a thank you to Carlos. Your family laughs the situation off, you thought your father would be mad but he wasn't. Your husband joined in on the laughing as the dinner continued. You couldn't help but laugh as well. Maybe the trend wasn't so bad after all.
 ̄ ̄
You and your husband arrived back at your house. Laying your body on the couch, sighing softly. Carlos sat next to you with a wide smile on his face.
"what?" You chuckle asking him with a curious look, noticing his wide smile.
He sighs, wrapping his arm around your shoulder. "I guess I'm your daddy now." He laughs.
"Oh shut up!" You exclaim, playfully hitting his shoulder but you had a smile on your face.
Then again, you were thankful that your family supported your relationship and how you have the best husband in the world.
#f1#carlos sainz x you#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz one shot#carlos sainz x female reader#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic
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