#i'm going to see the movie next week and then look up a plot synopsis

[nevertochange-evertoshare]

Can I tell y'all something? I have no idea what Wicked is about. Like not a clue. I know it's sort of The Wizard of Oz and there's Glinda and Elphaba and Fieryo(?) but I could not tell you anything else. I've listened to the soundtrack, hell I sang For Good at my senior showcase in high school. And still, somehow, I have avoided the entire plot of this show.

[cosmicschmidt]

UNTIL I FOUND YOU (3)

PART 1, PART 2

Coriolanus Snow x fem!Reader

Synopsis: When the 18 year old Coriolanus Snow recieves the news that he has to mentor a tribute in order to claim the Plinth Prize, he expected everything but not a shy girl from district 12 to claim his heart.

Word count: 2,7K

Warnings: Reader pretty much just replaces Lucy Gray, Lucy Gray does not exsist in this (I´m sorry), some things might not fully add up to the movie plot ´cause I only saw it once and that was two weeks ago, use of Y/N, it´s implied that the reader is shorter than Coryo, small swearing, simple inhumane Hunger Games topics, mention of a wound, brutality!!

Reblogs and requests are always welcomed <3 (just like pointing out grammatical mistakes :))

Previously…

"Wait-" Y/N grabs a hold of his free wrist.

"Can you get us some food? Please? We´re practically starving."

Coriolanus just nodded at her quietly, the space between the both of them growing as he pulled away from her. The girl suddenly feels empty without him standing next to her like a shield that´s been protecting her has been taken away.

The reporter - whose name seems to be Lucky Flickermann - now turned back to the cage ends his live report,

"The 10th annual Hunger Games are soon approaching, so come down to the Zoo and see the Tributes before it´s too late." he does a dramatic pause.

"And I mean, too late," he adds with a small smirk.

"Capitol news."

"I´m Lucretius.", he looks up to the sky before stretching out his hand and catching a coin.

"Lucky Flickermann." with that the live report ends.

Y/N´s words ring in Coriolanus´ ears for the next few hours, during the lecture and confrontation with Dr. Gaul, the second he reached the cafeteria, he put as much food as possible on his plate, filling it with various goods.

Multiple students chatter around him, but he´s not up for a debate about whose tribute will win, never the less just a simple conversation, the thought of it alone brings Coriolanus discomfort. So his eyes scatter across the filled room, and when he spots a small empty two-seat table he walks over to it and sits down.

As he takes a seat he waits for a second, the feeling of someone watching him never leaving since he collected a plate and filled it with a bunch of food, the view of it alone causing his stomach to erupt into quiet rumbling.

With a quick look around, checking if someone is watching him, he takes hold of the blue napkin and places it on his lap, his hands spring into action and he places a few cookies into the blue fabric.

"Trying to fatten that poor girl up, so you can finally start taking bets?" a voice right across from the small table pulls him out of his thoughts. Before him stands Sejanus, a look of anger displayed on his face, while his hands hold him up on the table.

Coriolanus stops in his tracks, Sejanus´ tone something he does not need right now.

"You think, they´ll give these kids a schap if we don´t give them a reason to do it." although it was meant as a question, the way Coriolanus´ tone changed throughout speaking made it seem like a simple statement.

"How do you think your Tribute will have a chance if he can´t eat." the mention of Marcus causes the look in Sejanus' eyes to soften, Coriolanus knew what to say in order to convince his… friend.

A short moment of silence washes over their conversation, Sejanus lets out a sigh before sitting down on the still-empty chair, his eyes not finding the blue eyes that bore into the side of his face.

"He was my classmate. Back in 2…" Sejanus says in a low voice.

In return, Coriolanus takes a look across the room.

"It's not your fault he's there-" Coriolanus speaks up, shaking his head a little.

"I know. I'm so blameless I'm choking on it. My father bought him for me you know, at the reaping… just so he can show me, that I could never go back to 2." Coriolanus stays quiet, as he watches the Brown haired boy tear up, guilt eating away at him.

"But being Capitol is gonna kill me," he adds, his head shaking slightly, his gaze empty.

"So do something about it." Coriolanus cuts in, his expression stern.

He just continues filling the napkin with a few slices of a sandwich, the look on his face challenging Sejanus to do the same.

"You're quite the Rebell." the brown-haired boy laughs out, before he whipes his nose, blinking once then twice in the hope of no tears falling.

"Oh, I am. I'm bad news." the blonde replies, a teasing tone to his words. All Sejanus can do is chuckle softly, before his own hands grab a soft napkin.

-

Both of them find themselves getting closer and closer to the 'zoo' where the Tributes are held against their will, displayed for everyone to inspect. From far away, the mentor of the girl from District 12 was able to make out the crowd that formed around the metal bars.

Coriolanus can't help but let his eyes wander, his blue orbs desperately trying to catch a glimpse of Y/N, as he takes big strides away from Sejanus as both of them part for the purpose of finding their tribute.

"Marcus!" he heard in the distance, but the voice was blurred.

Coriolanus can't focus on the rest of the words that leave Sejanus' mouth, as his eyes linger on the metal bars that separate him from her. He finally spots her, his tense shoulders relaxing a tad bit. The left side of her body is pressed against Jessup's, while Y/N's hand lays on the side of his neck. Both of them sitting on a rock with their backs to the crowd.

Coriolanus can tell that her mouth is moving, yet he can't seem to grasp onto what she's whispering in the ear of the boy who sits next to her. The blonde can't help but clench his jaw at the scene unfolding before his eyes, as his hands wrap a notch tighter around the food-filled fabric.

"Y/N" he speaks up, finally trusting his voice enough to do so.

The H/C-haired girl's eyes catch her mentor's quiet whisper, her head snapping to the side facing him. The small simile that spreads across her face does not go unnoticed by Coriolanus, as she brushes off her clothes. With small, yet quick steps she finally closes the distance between them.

His hands twitch beside his body, the urge to feel her skin against his resurfacing, as their eye contact never fades.

"You remembered?"

"Hmm?" Coriolanus hums, his eyes not leaving her face, she throws him a questioning look at his speechless expression.

"Oh right, right. I got this for you." he quickly says, the weight of the food in his hands leaving the second he places the napkin in her hands, their fingers touching for a split second, sending a shiver down his back.

Y/N herself can't help but feel her face warm at the contact, but she hides her face a little as she looks down at the meal in her hands. Within seconds she unwraps the cookies and the sandwich slices.

"Thank you, this will help us a lot."

"Us?" the boy from the Capitol mutters under his breath, wondering why you would even think about sharing the food he just gave you.

"Common, Jessup, eat," Y/N says with a nod of her head, her hand offering him a piece of some expensive-looking dish.

"'m not hungry," he mutters under his breath, his eyes staring daggers in Coriolanus' direction.

"No I insist, you have to eat." she pushes the food into his hands, and he throws her a thankful smile alongside a nod, yet before he walks back to the rock they sat on, he throws Coriolanus another look.

The mentioned boy holds the stare, and as Jessup turns away, his eyes land on a small wound that rests right underneath his ear. His brows furrow in confusion.

"What happened to his neck?"

Y/N gulps, her eyes not finding his.

"Bat bite. First night on the train." she nods sadly, her mind going back to when it happened.

"He didn't sleep a wink on the journey, making sure to keep the bats off so I can get some rest…" The girl's words grow quieter, her eyes trailing to the left as they find a Capitol girl making fun of the girl from District 10.

Y/N frowns when she observes the 'mentor' taunt her own tribute, holding a water bottle in her direction only to withdraw it when she reaches out to grab it. Y/N clenches her jaw at the sight.

"I learned in twelve that hunger is a weapon."

"Your friend over there sure knows it…"

"She's not my friend she is.." he thinks for a second, "..Poison with perfect teeth."

The girl from District 12 lets out a laugh, yet it's not fully genuine, her eyes fall back onto the food in her palms, a sickening feeling forming in the pit of her stomach. Meanwhile, Coriolanus grabs a hold of the metal bar, as he leans forward looking down at her.

"Are you going to share everything that I give to you with Jessup?" he asks, his breath fanning along a strand of loose hair, their close proximity making it possible for him to whisper.

"Why?" the girl's eyes widened in confusion at his question.

"Think I can collect my strengths so I can strangle them in the arena? Coriolanus, I can not kill these people.." she hisses out, her words make her look almost helpless, and again the blonde feels the urge to reach out and grab her hand.

"But I might have a chance to help you," he replies quickly, his eyes somehow holding ambition.

"There is a possibility that I can make some suggestions to the game makers, I might even be able to let the audience send gifts into the arena. Food and water…" he mumbles assuringly, his head nodding along his words.

"Listen, the people can donate to you, so you have to convince them to like you, which they already do. You're the first to volunteer, ever, and for your sister too, that kind of stuff catches attention," he says enthusiastically.

"I don't want to talk about that, what I did there was no choice, I had to do that. Don't you understand?" she asks slightly taken back, her brows furring in bewilderment.

"Besides, I've seen the arena, there's nowhere to hide, what's the point in winning the audience over? The guards say you get money if you get more people to watch, and you say you want to help me… which is it?" she asks unsure, her eyes boring into his, as she rests her own hand on one of the cold metal bars, awaiting his response.

Coriolanus' mouth parts, yet no words escape, before his gaze lands on her hand, so close to his, and before he can stop himself his palm engulfs her smaller hand.

"Both," he states with confidence, as he gives her a firm nod, letting her know that he truly means it. Y/N breathes out in relief, as she nods back at him, the warmth of his calloused hands bringing her comfort. Yet, she wiggles her hand out from under his slightly tightening grasp, taking a sandwich and taking a bite, her stomach screaming at her to finish the whole meal.

As she continues to chew, she catches Coriolanus looking at the food in her grasp, when she catches his stare, he expeditiously averts his gaze, looking around as if she didn't just catch him ogling. Without a word, she takes one of the cookies and hands it to him through the bars.

"Oh, no thank you." he refuses to take the baked good from her.

"Saw you staring, just take it," she says with a shrug of her shoulders.

He hesitantly takes it from her, as the both of them lower to the ground in order to eat while sitting.

"Thought there was plenty of food in the Capitol," she asks, although it did not sound like a question, more like a fact that she simply stated. Her eyes are still on the sandwich in her grasp, while Coriolanus himself breaks the cookie in two, eating the first half of it in one bite.

He lets out a laugh at her statement, her words throwing him years back to the war.

"You know one time during the war, I ate a whole jar of paste. Just to stop the pain in my stomach." Y/N scrunches her nose in disgust.

"Well, how was it?"

He thinks for a moment, a smile forming on his lips, "Pasty." he laughs out, and Y/N can't help but let a giggle slip out as well before she muffles it with another bite of the food. Coriolanus' eyes stay on her, his eyes glimmering in amusement.

But the small moment dies when the girl looks away, her head turning slightly as she looks over her shoulder, the blonde's eyes follow hers.

"Little Wovey… she's so sweet… wouldn't hurt a fly… she reminds me of my sister…" she says, her head turning away from the little girl that currently rests against her district partner who looks deep in thought. Y/N swallows thickly at the thought of her little sister, now all on her own at home, having to watch her only relative die in the games. The thought alone causes the corners of her eyes to burn, yet she won't allow herself to shed one tear, not one, she promised her.

"I'm sorry…" the blonde whispers, as his face holds concern and guilt, he sends her a small assuring smile in order to lighten her mood.

"You seem like a good man, Coriolanus," Y/N claims.

Coriolanus slightly shakes his head, his eyes everywhere but never meeting her own. It seems like he's about to say something, but Y/N interrupts him.

"It would have been nice to meet you under different circumstances," she quickly adds, her eyes on the almost completely eaten sandwich, while she fidgets with her fingers.

"How about… we make a deal," he replies.

"A deal?" she asks, her eyes snapping back up to meet his blue ones.

"Yes. After all of this… I'll take you out on a date," he says with a serious tone. His hand reaches through the bars as it wraps around one of her wrists.

She laughs out at his 'deal', "Yeah, exactly, have a drink or two, very funny." she laughs again in disbelief while rolling her eyes at his attempt to lighten the mood, although that's pretty impossible.

"I'm serious."

"Have you seen these people? I don't stand a chance, I'll be dead within minutes in the arena, I never learned how to fight or hunt, my chances are practically zero." she huffs out, her free hand wrapping around his hand that is holding her other hand, attempting at pulling him off.

Yet his grip tightens, "I'm being serious like I said before, maybe I can change some rules, bend some even, I don't care, we'll go on that date," he says again.

Just as Y/N opens her mouth, a response at the tip of her tongue ready to be released, a scream erupts through the air.

Brandy, the tribute that had been taunted by her mentor, grabbed the bottle out of the glass, as she took hold of the mentor's collar pulling her closer with an angry yell. With a quick smash, she shatters the bottle into pieces and uses the remains as a weapon, forcefully stabbing it into the side of her neck. The already red-dressed girl is now covered in more red.

The screams alerted every individual around them, as other people screamed in horror at the brutality.

Y/N can't help but gasp in shock, just like Coriolanus she's back on her feet, her eyes trained on the girl on the ground gasping for air.

Coriolanus runs up right to the other mentor's side, using his hands to put pressure on the wound as a horrified expression spreads all over his features.

"It's okay. it's okay, I'll get help," he mutters out of breath, frantically looking out for someone who would provide what she needs.

"Somebody help us please!" after his plea, the sound of guns firing runs through the air, and with a thump, Brandy holds onto her stomach before hitting the ground, dead.

At the sound of shooting, Coriolanus hides his face underneath his arms, shielding himself from bullets that could hit him at any given moment. As he slowly raises back up, the horrified expression returns to his face, he watches the life drain from Arachne's face, her skin growing paler.

"Oh…no, no.." he rasps out, the events leave him speechless, and before he can register it, Peacekeepers roughly grab him by the arm and pull him up from the ground away from the lifeless body.

Taglist: (Crossed-out can’t be tagged)

@prettybliss | @unclecrunkle | @yourlocalwofreader | @ennycutie | @unamused-boss | @spatt777 | @xyzstar | @especiallythewomenandthechildren | @mysteris-things | @crackheadhours | @guacam011y | @clintssupremacy | @importantgalaxyrunaway | @zucchinimalfoy |

[baek-at-it-again95]

Deja Vu (Spiderman! Yunho x reader)

Synopsis: It had been three weeks since you saw him. The masked stranger that seemed to appear out of nowhere, protecting your city from crime. The people of the town call him Spiderman, and he has plagued your mind day and night since he saved you.

Warnings: violence, very brief mention of a near death experience, sort of suggestive but not really, I do not know anything about chemistry so please forgive me

Concepts: best friend yunho x reader, ex choi san, angst, fluff, romance, comfort

A/N: hello beautiful atinys! A lovely friend of mine had this genius idea that I had to bring to life. we were totally not inspired by a tiktok edit. It has very similar plot points to the original spiderman movies. I hope you enjoy! <3

"But...who do you think he is?" you ask your best friend, Yunho. He holds the door open for you as you leave your chemistry class together.

"Who knows...but you worry about Spiderman more than you worry about yourself these days, Y/N."

"What can I do?" you ask, throwing your hands up haphazardly. "I almost died falling off a building. That's kind of traumatic, Yunho. Might as well talk about the guy who save me." He sighs, running a hand through his hair.

"I understand. Stay out of trouble, will you? I worry about you being out and about on your own. Hell, I worry something's happened to you when you don't respond to my texts within a five minute window." 

"Clingy much?" you tease, knowing how much of an overthinker your best friend is.

"N-not in like a weird way!" Yunho sputters, dragging a hand down his face in embarrassment. "You're my best friend, Y/N. It's my job to be worried about you. Besides...who else am I going to study chemistry with?" He shoots you his usually goofy grin and you laugh.

"Not me, you know I hate this class!"

"Oh come on, you're the only person that will listen to me talk about it."

"I guess that's my job in this friendship." You shrug. "I will say, it's just so sexy the way you talk about ionic compounds. I can never stop listening." You snort.

"Good to know," he retorts, grabbing your backpack to keep you from running into people on the way to your next class. "Study at the usual spot tonight?" he asks.

You laugh. "I'll be there, sexy."

***

The past few weeks after the incident have been rocky for you, and since you made it halfway through this week without any issue, it gave you a false sense of hope that things could be back to normal.

But no. As if your night couldn't get any worse...

About thirty minutes ago, your boyfriend, Choi San, told you that he wants to take a break from the relationship. You know your relationship has been strained recently, but you thought that it would just pass with time. Maybe it's for the better, but for now, your emotions are still high. Oh, and you found out that you bombed your chem test earlier today. And as if that wasn't terrible enough, the icing on the cake was that it had started pouring on your walk home. 

At least no one can see my tears in the rain, you think to yourself, head down as you walk to your dorm.

"Y/N?"

You sniff, quickly wiping at your face on instinct. When you look up, you come face to face with Jeong Yunho. You muster up the best smile you can to greet him, praying he doesn't ask any questions. If you have to answer anything about your miserable day, you'll surely crack and start crying even harder. "Hey Yuyu." His eyebrows crease with worry, and you think he might have caught on to something. 

"You're going to get sick out here," he comments.

You breathe a small sigh of relief. "No worries. I'm almost home, anyways. No use in calling for a taxi. But...what are you doing out, Yunho?"

"Oh, well I...um...I accidentally fell asleep at the library." 

"Again?" you ask.

"Again," he confirms, hands in his pockets and eyes on his feet.

"Well, let's get home quickly. God, I can't wait to be out of these clothes," you groan, the wet fabric sticking to every part of you and making you uncomfortable. You just barely catch the soft pink of Yunho's cheeks in the low light of the street lamps. "Look, you're already getting sick. Go, hurry home," you push, shooing him away.

"I'm going, I'm going. Goodnight, Y/N."

"Night, Yuyu."

You continue on in the direction of your dorm, eyes on the ground as you make a sad attempt not to splash in deep puddles. The walk seems to drag on longer than usual as you're left alone again with your thoughts.

"Hey!" A voice rings immediately after you turn the corner. It sounded like it came from across the street. You don't stop, just turn to glance at what's going on. That's when you see about four men, dressed in black, walking towards you. You quicken your pace, heart beating rapidly in your chest as you hear the men moving closer. You turn down an alley in hopes of losing them, but they're too fast.

"Hey sweetheart, give us your bag and we'll leave you alone."

"Wait!" you call out. Your thoughts run at a million miles per hour, trying to process the entire situation that occurred in what felt like seconds.

"Or not." Another one chimes in, laughing. You barely have time to process anything as one of them pushes you, shoving the side of your body into the wall. You cry out, closing your eyes and bracing yourself for another hit.

But after a moment, nothing comes.

You hear some shuffling and some shouts in front of you. Lowering your hands from their protective position in front of your face, you open your eyes, seeing one of the men running away. What is happening? As he runs, a force pulls him back quickly. He's pulled by...a rope? No, a web. Spiderman appears right before your eyes, kicking the man to the ground. The criminal scoots back, turning and running away in the direction he and the others came. Spiderman then quickly disappears around the corner.

When you turn to leave, he's right in front of you, hanging upside down from a web. A small gasp escapes your lips.

"You seem to be a danger magnet," he comments.

"It seems so. I suppose you're dangerous, then?"

"No, quite the opposite." You smile.

"There must be some way to thank you," you wonder aloud, taking a step closer. You bring your hands to his face, hesitating as your fingertips touch the hem of his mask.

"Wait," he starts. But he doesn't say anything more. You gently pull the mask up until it stops just over his nose.

"Thank you." You gently bring your lips to his. The kiss is slow and passionate, so lovely that you don't want it to end. But that would be against your better judgement. It's getting late, and he must have other things to attend to. You pull away just slightly, slowly pulling the mask back over his face. And with that, he shoots a web and swings up into the air, gone as quickly as he came.

***

"Y/N."

"Mm."

"Y/N," Yunho repeats, waving a hand in front of your face. "Are you okay?"

"I had possibly the worst night ever last night. So, no, not really," you reply curtly.

"What happened?" 

"Where do I even begin? Oh, for starters, San and I are taking a break," you huff, continuing before he can insert his words of pity. "Which is basically inescapable relationship purgatory. Then I found out I bombed our chem test, got poured on, and after running into you, I almost got jumped." You choose to withhold the information about Spiderman, still trying to wrap your head around your interaction with him.

"Y/N, that's awful," he replies, concern etched on every inch of his face.

"Yeah, it was, Yunho." 

"Are you sure you're alright enough to be at school right now?"

"Yep. I pay for this school, so it makes me feel better when I come to class, even if I don't pay attention. Plus, it's Friday. I can push through until the weekend." He looks like he has more to say, but he just nods. 

"Do you want to stay at my place tonight?" he asks suddenly. You look at him curiously. Sure, you've been to your best friend's apartment, but only to study or to pick up something before heading out somewhere. You've never stayed the night. "N-not like, I mean...we can just hang. Maybe it will help you take your mind off things. And you'll be safe," he adds.

"A sleepover? With my bestie? How could I say no?" Yunho smiles his adorable smile in response, and you can't help but think about how sweet he is. You haven't exactly returned his kindness lately with everything going on, and maybe you can talk to him about it at his place...at least give him some sort of apology.

***

"That's so you!" says Yunho, pointing at a character in the movie he put on. 

"Absolutely not!" you exclaim, throwing a piece of popcorn at him. 

"Ah, not nice!" he laughs, grabbing your wrist. Your smile falters and he lets go as soon as he notices. "I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" he asks worriedly. 

"No, no, it's okay. I just...I remembered I needed to talk to you about something." He tilts his head, looking at you like an innocent puppy. 

"Oh, what is it?" His tone is soft, with maybe a hint of nervousness.

"I just...I've been so in my head recently that I feel like I haven't been involved with you. All the time, you check on my wellbeing, and I forget to check on yours. I mean, when was the last time I asked how your life was going? You offer me nothing but kindness, and I have not returned it to you. And I'm really sorry, Yunho."

"Y/N, it's not like that," he assures gently. "I understand that you've been through a lot of stressful things recently. It's only human that you would react negatively to these stressors. I just want you to know that I'm here for you. No one is perfect, and no one's life is absent of hardships. People need guidance; they need care. People need stability in a time when their life is thrown off balance. Just know that I will be that stability for you, Y/N."

"Yunho—" you choke out, the all-too-familiar burning sensation in your throat as you fight back tears. 

"Oh, don't cry." He glances around nervously, not really sure how to comfort you. 

You laugh through your tears. "I just...what did I do to deserve you?" You practically knock him over as you crash your lips onto his, relaxing into his arms. Your kiss slow and passionate; warm and comforting. It's blissful, and it seems...oddly familiar. But you've never kissed your best friend before. Maybe in a dream? Your ex surely didn't kiss like this. You gently pull away from him, eyebrows scrunched.

"What?" Yunho asks, scanning your face.

"I just...got deja vu," you mumble.

"Strange." Yunho shrugs, pulling you back into a kiss. You push away again and giggle as he tries to chase your lips. The familiar feeling is still present. The only person you've kissed like this is....

The thought that pops into your head seems so unbelievable, so embarrassing that you don't dare give too much away in fear of being wrong. 

"You're...him?" you whisper. 

"Who?" he asks with big eyes, a smile tugging at his lips.

"You know who!"

"No, I don't know what you're talking about, Y/N." It feels as if he's teasing you. You groan out of frustration, not wanting to be wrong about such an outlandish idea. Yunho suddenly tenses a bit, setting you gently on the couch as he gets up.

"Well...perfect timing. Something's going on downtown," he says, disappearing into his room. You watch with a confused look until he emerges, clad in the familiar blue and red suit, mask in hand. Even though you had just made the connection...it didn't seem real. Your breath catches in your throat as you watch him.

"You just told me you knew. Why are you all shocked?" he asks.

"I didn't know I was right," you manage. Your nerdy best friend? A superhero that fights crime? Unbelievable. Yunho slides a window open before he looks back to you. 

"I'll be back in a few, okay?" You nod, coming over to him.

"Okay. Be safe." You peck his lips before he puts on his mask, climbing out the window. He leaps off the balcony and your heart practically stops, only to start back up again as you see him swinging on his webs from building to building. "Oh my god," you mutter to yourself, running a hand down your face.

You have a lot of things to say when he gets back. Starting with the fact that this was way sexier than ionic compounds.

[windingcorridor]

Manhunt is a life-changer, the kind of book that shifts your insides around and makes room for itself. I finished it at 3am last night, and have been wandering around the house since. I feel hollowed out. I want to- need to- read it again. Christ.

This book has a ton of Content Warnings, some stemming from genre, most stemming from its premise and perspective. CW: transphobia, dead-naming, cannibalism, dysphoria, rape, implied incest, fatphobia, public execution, slavery, torture, body horror.

Disclaimer: I'm writing this review from my perspective as a man exploring their gender, folding in They/ Them pronouns with my He/ Him. While I have considered in myself whether or not I am a woman, I don't think I am. Do with that info what you will.

I found Manhunt on a recommendation shelf at my local bookstore- shout out to Eagle Eye Books in Decatur, GA- and its cover grabbed me instantly. It's a shocking image, blunt in its implication and color. It's a fitting one, too, echoing the words inside. You're going to get grabbed and the story isn't going to let go until the last.

You can get a synopsis for the thing anywhere, so no need here. Just know that Fran & Beth's story starts with the punchline- "What if being a man turned you into a rage zombie?"- and runs red with it. Being a trans woman is already goddam hard in the real world- now imagine people looking at you the same way people in zombie movies look at people who have been bit. It's a fantastic grounding device, with Felker-Martin using it as a jumping off point to point out how fucked transphobia can get.

Speaking of rage, this book is so full of anger and hatred, righteous and otherwise. It smacks you, not just inside the content but with its construction. Felker-Martin hates transphobes, trustfund child-adults, people who will put a hashtag on their twitter profile but never do anything. She never writes this out explicitly, but the way th`e story is told? Buddy, she makes that very clear.

The characters are deliciously complex. You start with easy sketches- the pretty one, the strong one, the fat one, the TERF, the trans man, etc- but you hop from perspective to perspective often enough that things begin to mold into a rich picture.

(If I have any criticism of the book at all, it's that, occasionally, we shift perspective so fast and often that timelines can get wobbly. I'll think it's only been a few hours in-story, but then a character will mention it's been a few weeks. It course corrects cleanly, though, and never became too much of an issue.)

One of the perspective characters- Ramona- is a part of The Legion, militarized TERFs who have taken over huge swaths of the US in name of eradicating "men wearing womanface." Thing is, Ramona has a thing for trans women. By day, she's an XX chromosome tattoo wearing Nazi, by night she's sleeping with a trans lover in a secret brothel. She hates her hypocrisy (so many of the characters ooze self-hatred), but she is so caught up in the fervor of her movement that she can't slow down.

These contradictions cover the whole cast. At times, I hated them. Others, I loved them. By the end, all I wanted to do is spend more time with them.

It's here I want to say- I love you, Beth. It's obvious that the author loves you, too. Not in the "here's-some-plot-armor" way, the book isn't cheap like that. The author writes Beth and all of the other trans characters with so much empathy, personal history, and heart, it's difficult not to see them as breathing, beautiful people.

When you have a book like this- one that moves at so much force- you worry that there isn't a way in hell that it will stick the ending. Happy to report that as much of a power-drill the last act is, I left the book satisfied. I, alone in my living room, warm forgotten beer on the coffee table, wife and daughter asleep in the next room, muttered, "Whoa," when I read the last paragraph.

So, yeah. Read Manhunt. It isn't for everyone. The best art never is. But if you allow yourself to be taken by it, hold on.

Nick <3

[notebookmusical]

Okay Part 2! For some reason, i forgot to mention the new Gypsy casting with both girls in the Notebook as sisters! It's so exciting and I'm glad the cast is going into more shows since it's now closing, with John Cardoza going back to Moulin Rouge too. Interested to hear if Mama was Married now but I think all of the casting is good too with Danny Burstein as Herbie. They just announced Jordan Fisher in Urinetown too but I'm not really familiar with that show. But fun fact I have a book on my shelf with the play lol but I wanted to find a bootleg first I guess..idk lol. Are you familiar with it? Should I just listen to the cast album or wait for clips from Jordan Fisher and this cast?

If you want to know my ranking of bootlegs I watched for comparison, it would be Gatsby, Lempicka and then Gutenberg. However I missed the end of Gatsby, found Lempicka okay but somewhat hard to follow for some reason and dont remember many songs. Gutenberg didn't really have songs and a silly humor but I enjoy both actors a lot and think their humor together is great. However Book of Mormon is not really one of my favorites, so if you don't enjoy that, you probably wouldnt like this. It also took us days to watch but I think it picked up a lot in Act Two and got more bizarre and funnier. But it was also hard to follow since they kept switching characters and the plot isn't supposed to make sense anyway. I also didn't have a chance to listen to these cast albums yet or again besides Gatsby though. I also found a Merrily bootleg and I'm so excited to watch it but have to wait until I can be fully into it and not too tired I've also never listened to all of it except a few songs so I'm excited to see what I'll think of it and I'm a big fan of the revival cast. I've been into a Sondheim mood lately too and his shows always make me so emotional. So at some point I will listen to these along with the Merrily one when i watch it. I'm so excited cuz you love it so much as well!!! I also found Joy Woods and Jeremy in Little Shop that I might watch at some point..maybe closer to Halloween. It's such a different role from the Notebook too even voice wise so I do want to check it out at some point.

I did watch the Death Becomes Her movie last night and am now trying to imagine the upcoming musical. Have you watched it? I do think they are younger compared to the movie when age and looking younger is a big part of it. I also don't know how they would do some of the stunts or fake deaths so maybe they changed some stuff. But I liked it and think it has potential for a musical although I don't know what kind of music would work. Pop doesn't really make sense..idk. what do you think? I love Megan Hilty and think its great casting but that's basically all I know so far. Also the taste music video makes a bit more sense now lol.

Omg that's so cool you're seeing her tour! I saw a few clips of performances the other day on Twitter and it just looks really fun and she put thought into some of the sets and transitions too but idk if you saw or want to be surprised. Juno would be sooo fun live. When's your show? I hope you have a great time! I tried and failed to get Zayn tickets for his SF show in a month but he has never toured so it sold out. Not sure if I will as the show gets closer since it's less than a month now. But I am planning to go to Wicked in the next few weeks if I can. After that is Hamilton and also Kimberly Akimbo and Some Like it Hot is in January. I wanna go to all of these but they're so close together and it depends if I can get rush tickets, but the other shows I haven't listened or seen at all which is why I wanted to go and it seems fun going in somewhat blind but we will see.

I'm hoping to get back into reading more. I'm excited for Sally Rooney's new book but I also never read Beautiful World so maybe I will read that too. How is it so far? I only read the synopsis once I think. Also I'm excited for Jandy Nelsons new book that just came out. I loved the snippet I read but not sure when I will read it. I will go back to reading I'll Give you the Sun at the same time probably so I am excited for that.

I was listening to all of Katy Perry's music before her album and then the new album. Unfortunately I did not like it as much but it's growing on me. It reminds me of Dua's album sort of if you liked that and go in not expecting much..but my sister loved it and now I'm just accepting it as it is. It is not as bad as people said in my opinion and pretty similar to her other albums. Anyway now Lady Gaga just released a short album with a few new songs and covers from the new Joker movie. I feel like it's perfect timing cuz I always pair them together and grew up with following their careers. This is not her new album though..apparently that's coming in February. I know it's not really a musical, more like a jukebox musical with more classic type songs which I don't mind. I did watch the first one anyway so I will probably watch it and she will make it better and also with the songs. I remember they played send in the clowns at the end of the first one so I hope it could be similar to that. I also loved her in Star is Born but this movie will show the more campy Gaga style but the songs are almost similar to her singing with Tony Bennett since they're classics. I'm just a fan of her though and like that she can sing different styles. I do really love her new song with Bruno Mars that almost reminds me of a Broadway duet with a classic type of sound so if it's like that, I'll enjoy it. I'm listening to it later today and can tell you what I think.

Also one of my favorite bands The Cure announced a new song and a album coming out the week after Soccer Mommy! Both of their music really saved me these last few years and it totally shocked me. Their new song is so good and you should give it a listen to see if you like it since it's the same as my favorite type of songs from them lol but they do have more upbeat songs too. If you like it, I recommend their album Disintegration or Wish for more upbeat stuff lol and any Soccer Mommy album. Anyway since you mentioned musical recommendations, I recommend The Violet Hour with Jeremy, Santino Fontana and Erika from Mean Girls. I listened to it after Gatsby and thought it went well. The title song is so beautiful. I hope you like it. I hope you're doing well and have a good weekend! I went to six flags last weekend and might go again in October. My asks will probably be once a week from now on since I feel that works better anyway though. I always read your blog and posts and see your beautiful edits though and it makes me smile!

sorry for the delay in replying my friend!! 🤍 i hope you're having a good october so far!

i'm so so excited for joy and jordan! i wasn't the most keen on jordan when i saw her in the notebook in chicago (saw an understudy — juliette (who i adored) but i've grown to like jordan more through listening to her on the cast recording. but joy... i cannot wait to see her shine. i'm so excited for joy woods world domination. i want her in everything. and i'm really excited for the new cast too, like anna zavelson who was in the recent NYCC piazza that i enjoyed, and i've heard benji santiago was delightful in the muny in the heights, and aisha jackson is deeply beloved too! i am also really intrigued to see who they'll cast for the tour. and i think john cardoza should play middle noah next (just because i want to hear him sing leave the light on, it's not easy, forever, etc.) but also really want him to do other things (would love him to be orpheus in hadestown, or guy in once, or ... so many other lovely roles). it's just been a while i've seen someone as talented and charming and charismatic and sweet.

i am not very familiar with urinetown! i know like two songs, but i've been meaning to check it out very soon — maybe that'll be my cast recording for next week and then we can discuss? 👀 i have no idea if i should hunt for a bootleg either but i've heard people are quite intrigued by the cast.

i haven't seen bootlegs of gatsby or gutenberg, but my friend who loves lempicka sat me down and had me watch it with her. i wasn't charmed by it. i do not particularly care for book of mormon (have never seen it live, but watched a bootleg back in the day, and have listened to the cast recording before) but they have done a wonderful job of casting talented people (a lot of whom i adore) over the years. i hope you love the merrily boot; this production of merrily is just phenomenal. i have not seen the joy/jeremy little shop boot but 👀 i have actually also never seen little shop 😭 you'll have to let me know what you think of it!

i'm going to watch the death becomes her movie with my friend on tuesday! i know the musical did really well out of town and i'm really intrigued to see if it also does well on broadway! i really love megan hilty so i'm just happy she's employed.

i'm seeing sabrina on november 6th! still no idea what i'm going to wear to tour but my friends and i have finally cemented what we're wearing to eras so at least there's that. i've seen some things here and there but i'm not actively looking for things! so i've been semi-spoiled but not quite! i'm sorry about zayn :( i hope you have fun at wicked! i'm seeing it in november :) i'm also going to see back to the future in december! unfortunately, i'm going to miss kimberly akimbo while it's here in seattle because i'll be in california! but i'll be seeing waitress at the sf playhouse so a win is still a win :)

i'm currently reading intermezzo still — trying to finish part 1 by monday/buddy reading with a friend — but i also started reading razzle dazzle: the battle for broadway by michael riedel! emphasis on trying, because i haven't really felt like reading lately! but i'm going to carve out some time to sit down and read intermezzo tomorrow!

i haven't listened to the new katy perry album! i don't particularly care for her music so it is not very high on my priority list, but i did enjoy the last dua album! did you see the brat remix collab list? i'm most excited for the 1975 on i might say something stupid (definitely laughed at that one), sympathy is a knife ft. ariana grande, everything is romantic ft. caroline polachek, and i think about it all the time ft. bon iver! i have not seen the joker movies actually! but i did get a text from a friend being like "DID YOU KNOW this was a musical" in a very accusatory manner 😭 like yes, i personally know every single musical. and am responsible.

i'm so glad you have their music 🤍 and i will listen to soccer mommy soon, i promise! is there an album i should start with first, or should i just go in order of release date? i'm adding the violet hour to my list!! it's a real list that exists on notion! i've never been to six flags — what's your favorite ride? i haven't been editing much lately because i'm 80% sure i have carpal tunnel so i'm trying to take it easy (also haven't been crafting much for that same reason) : ( but i do have a few old drafts i might post eventually <33333 hope you're having a good week my friend! 🤍

[zombaarbie]

Time After Time

(Eddie Munson x Reader)

Synopsis: Reader and Eddie go to a friend's Halloween party together. Reader does some super cool/scary makeup for their costumes. Eddie asks to take their relationship to the next step.

A/N: I did special effects makeup for a long time, and it made me think "I bet Eddie would be really into this." It's not even really a super integral part of the story, but I thought it would be cute to include. Also the plot took a turn towards the end so I hope it isn't too all over the place. Still a super fluffy lil oneshot, nonetheless. Any feedback is welcome, as always! Enjoy :)

*GIF is not mine!*

"Hold still, Eds!"

"I'm sorry, babe! It freaks me out when you get that close to my eye!" He gripped the edges of the chair, struggling to stay still as you worked on his face.

You rolled your eyes, "Oh, quit being a drama queen. I'm almost finished."

Steve invited you to a party he was hosting tonight, and while parties weren't usually your or Eddie's thing you jumped at the chance to see your friends and spend time with your boyfriend. After graduation Eddie got a job at the auto shop and you started college.

Needless to say, you both had been very busy lately with adult life. You went from spending almost every day together to catching each other between shifts/classes or on weekends, if you were lucky.

It was a costume party since Halloween was coming up so, of course, you took the opportunity to show off your artistic abilities. Eddie was going as Freddy Krueger and you chose to be Regan MacNeil.

He loved watching you work on your "creations", as he called them; and he especially loved when you used his face as your canvas. However, he sometimes had trouble sitting still for long periods, and he got a little bit uncomfortable when your tools would go near his eyes. Due to all the unnecessary squirming, time was running out for you to finish his makeup.

Your costume and makeup were already mostly complete, aside from the contacts. You decided you would wait to put those in until after finishing up with Eddie.

After adding a few finishing touches you took a step back to admire your work. "Damn, I'm good." You gestured for him to look in the mirror. A grin spread over his face, "Sick, babe."

Now that you were done you gave him the go ahead to put on the green and red striped sweater, hat, and the most important part- the glove. Meanwhile, you completed your look by slipping in some yellowy-greenish contacts.

Robin was the first to greet you at the party, "Holy shit! You guys look awesome." Her eyes were wide as she scanned your and Eddie's costumes. She and Vickie had come as the twins from The Shining, one of your favorite movies.

The four of you chatted for a bit, thankful that you were finally able to catch up. You hadn't had the chance to see your friends very often since graduation so it was nice to hear about what they had been up to lately.

The entire time you were at the party you and Eddie stayed close to each other. It was nice to be in his presence after a long week. He had been working a lot of overtime lately so your time together had been even more sparse than usual. It was frustrating, but you knew he had to make a living, so instead of getting worked up about it you tried to just enjoy your time together now.

People had been coming up to the two of you the whole night gushing over how cool and scary your costumes were. You had to admit, you had done a pretty good job. You thought you had done especially well on Eddie's. He looked almost indistinguishable from Englund, and you were quite proud of yourself. There wasn't a contest, but you knew if there had been you would have been the obvious winner.

As the night went on and the drinks kept flowing you found yourself coming out of your shell more and more.

A gasp escaped your lips as you heard the familiar beginning of one of your favorite Cyndi Lauper songs. You turned to look at your boyfriend, a drunken lovesick smile slowly spreading across your face. "Dance with me, Eds." You sat your beer down and intertwined your fingers with his.

Eddie chuckled, pulling you close by your waist, "C'mere, baby." He returned your smile, his eyes half lidded.

After my picture fades

You wrapped your arms around his neck as the two of you gently swayed side to side. Despite the fact that you've been dating him for a long while now, it still flustered you to look into his eyes in this moment. You looked down, unable to hold his gaze.

And darkness has turned to gray

He lifted your chin to make you look at him. Even with those hideous contacts, prosthetic scars decorating your face, and fake vomit splattered on your dress you were still breathtaking to him.

Watching through windows

Despite the roaring ambiance of the party surrounding you it felt like you and Eddie were the only ones in the room. You cherished every moment you were able to spend with him and you knew he did the same with you. Especially since they had been so few and far between these days.

You're wondering if I'm okay

It was almost as if Eddie had been reading your mind. "I've been thinking," He paused, considering his wording. "Maybe we should look at getting place together." He seemed nervous, but it quickly subsided when he saw how your face lit up.

Secrets stolen from deep inside

"Do you mean it?" His heart swelled with the way you looked up at him, "Only if you want to. I just miss you." You nodded a little more eagerly than you had meant to, "I miss you too. I feel like I barely see you anymore."

And the drum beats out of time

He acknowledged your sentiment with a nod. "That's actually why I've been picking up all those extra shifts lately," A shy smile played at his lips. He leaned down, nestling his head in the crook of your neck, tightening his hold on you, "Been saving to get somethin' nice for us."

If you're lost you can look and you will find me

Your heart fluttered at his words. You wondered how you got so lucky to end up with such a loving, hardworking man. Earlier, you had been feeling annoyed at him for spending so much time at the shop. While you didn't actually say anything to him you still felt guilty for having those feelings at all. The entire time he had been working his fingers to the bone to provide a nice home for you.

Time after time

In a goofy accent you replied, "I would be delighted to move in with you, Mr. Munson." Earning a light chuckle from him that tickled your neck. He pulled back, letting out a breath. "Let's start looking first thing tomorrow morning, yeah?" But before you could respond he corrected himself, "Actually, breakfast first thing in the morning, then we can start looking. Can't focus on an empty stomach." You rolled your eyes at him playfully.

If you fall I will catch you

"I love you, sweetheart." His voice was soft, tender as he spoke to you. He'd said those words countless times, but they never lost the effect they had on you. Your legs turned to Jell-O every time he expressed his love gently like this. The intimacy of it never failing to give you butterflies.

I'll be waiting

You leaned up to press your lips to his. It was a soft and passionate kiss. After a few short moments you pulled away, your heart beat fast and your breathing uneven. Pulling him down to touch his forehead to yours, "I love you too, Eddie."

Time after time

[dinuhsoar]

little love | l.l

- care giver!loki x little!f!reader

warnings: age regression (if that counts), paci use + bottle use (slight), slipping in front of people, potential typos, lmk if I've missed any!

*please read all warnings before continuing*

synopsis: the avengers and loki meet up for a game; y/n invited as well. however things take a turn for the worst when something happens.

artifact citation: sorry for my absence everyone! I've decided that I'm going to start posting from now on, and to give myself motivation, I've decided to post at least one fic a week! jus' gonna call this motivation monday. here's a wip that's been accumulating dust for the bast four months! next week's mm will definitely be yuanfen, perhaps even cheaper three! also, first time writing little!reader (at least I think lmao). I don't know much about the community, so sorry if I offend/get things wrong! I'm also thinking of redoing my blog! pand rq sorry I have so much to say, but plot came from someone who wrote a fic of steve from stranger thing where they play monopoly or something and the reader slips (and another (or the same lmao can't remember)) wrote a fic with the same concept but just with eddie! anyhow, enjoy!

you were excited to go see the rest of the marvel team. you've been living separately from them all except for loki whom lived with you despite the both of you being offered a place in the tower. and while you met the team before, it was only brief before they had a mission to go do.

loki, upon arrival at the tower, had messaged tony asking him where everyone was; to which he responded with 'at the cub. didn't know you were coming today, leaving now.'

both loki and you had remained in the tower, and loki was skeptical of your behaviour, as you began to turn the tv on, plopping down to watch [favourite kid tv show/movie]. however there weren't any immediate signs and he just brushed it off as you wanting to watch your favourite movie or show.

but regardless, loki was quite prepared. he had your blankie, paci (plus two spares), a bottle, a shirt of his for you to wear; him knowing damn well you'd rather be regressed surrounded by him; touch, smell, or otherwise. he had other things in there too, though; an extra stuffie, hair clips or hairties for either both of your hair or for his own purpose. he also had lotion and a medical kit; he's never used it yet, though.

you had let out a laugh at something on the tv, grabbing the immediate attention of loki as he sighed. you were just bound to slip soon today, and he just couldn't tell when.

it's only about another thirty minutes before everyone else arrives finally, loki heading over to you and grabbing the remote from you to turn the tv off. he saw it in your eyes; the barely there protest.

"they're back, love," he stated simply, you straightening up and watching as they walked into the room, everyone catching up with each other before tony laughed, "I don't know about you guys, but I'm starving!"

and everyone had agreed; including you, despite loki making summoning you a meal, thinking he wasn't going to stay as long as he already has.

but steve just sighed, shaking his head as he spoke up, "I guess we can order pizza? you're paying tony," the man snarled, placing his order for himself and bucky, knowing they like the same pizza, giving the phone to loki to place his order.

"what would you like, baby?" he asked you, looking at you as he awaited your answer.

"[go to pizza]," you said nodding, loki placing the order and passing the phone to someone else.

"while that's going on, I was thinking we can all play a game!" piped up natasha, everyone agreeing.

it was decided that you'd all be playing uno. it was the only game tony had and it kinda made everyone mad at him; including yourself because, with the money he was making, how'd he not have any more games?

regardless, you and bucky split the deck of cards, shuffling them both, before bucky shuffled them all together. it was a fair shuffle, and no one was bound to complain.

wrong.

tony and nat were screaming at each other, fingers pointing to each other, cards getting thrown about as they both tried to show that one or the other was cheating.

"you said no stacks, nat! you clearly stacked!"

"I didn't say that! you did!"

and so it went on. everyone just watched. they tried stopping it but it wasn't worth it.

meanwhile you sat with your knees to your chest, eyes looking over at loki before looking at tony and nat. somewhere along the lines, you slipped. your eyes were watery, wondering why everyone was yelling. and loki looked at you once before he stood up, gathering the attention of everyone else, him pulling you up after him.

and everyone could tell you were different, so to speak. your eyes were lost, and you clung to loki for dear life. that wasn't new in itself, but as the room fell quite, watching as loki left the room with you in his arms, they all heard a slight, 'wan' dada,' before you and him completely left the room.

he took you to his room in which he hardly ever used, and set down on the bed, him reaching for the bag, grinning as he saw your eyes light up when he pulled out the pacifier along with your favourite stuffie and blanket.

"hey, hey, it's gonna be alright, m'kay?"

he saw the tears in your eyes, some of them trailing down your cheeks.

"uncle tony and aunty nat stopped arguing, it's okay," he soothed, referring to the titles you both gave them in secret.

you nodded, smiling when he suddenly pulled out your bottle; however it fell and more tears pooled out.

"s'empty dada!" you wailed, pacifier falling from your mouth as you rolled over into your stomach and cried into the pillows beneath you.

"oh sweets, m'sorry. dada's very sorry." he scolded himself, not realising it was empty. again, he though you both wouldn't be here long.

"what if I made you 'poseidon,' hm? would that cheer up my sweet baby?"

poseidon was your favourite drink that loki made; it contained almond milk, your favourite fruits, and he made the milk blue by adding colouring to it; hence the name!

"dada I's want don," you pouted, face looking back at him, eyes red and puffy. if you asked him, he'd say you looked divine.

"alright, baby, you stay here, alright? dada will be back shortly." he fixed your paci, adjusting the blanket and handed you your stuffie back, and then left.

when loki reentered the room everyone was in, they all gasped, seeing the bottle in his hand. it was your favourite colour, and had stickers from your favourite tv show or movie on it. some would say loki looked comedic almost with it in his hands. he wasn't the brightest soul, so seeing that in his hands and a grin on his face, made them question him.

"who's that for?" asked peter, getting up to go look at the bottle as loki set it on the counter, getting the stuff out.

"it's for y/n," the man said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, pouring the milk into it before looking up at everyone's blank expression. "she age regresses?" and they all blinked, doe eyed. "some people fit for fun, others do it due to trauma; whatever that may be. think of it as being a physical age, but your mind goes to a younger age. with you, and you, yelling," loki said pointing, "she felt the need to regress. I'm her caregiver, so I take of her; dress her, feed her," he said shaking the bottle, "stuff like that."

loki added the fruit, dropping the dye in before shaking it up again, looking at them. "anymore questions?"

just then a floorboard creaked and everyone looked at you, pacifier in mouth, stuffie in hand and blanket wrapped around you. "wa tafin too long dada."

and although you didn't move your eyes off of loki, you could everyone else's. but they weren't negative looks. they were ones of awe, and perhaps even jealousy; not of you, but jealous of the type of relationship you had going on.

"little love, it's okay to come here. can you c'mere for me, yeah?" and loki smiled when bucky snapped his head towards the man, then to you as you shyly waddled out from the hallway, making your way over to him.

"one poseidon, my sweet angel," he said, giving her the drink in an overly dramatic manner, hands pinching the sides of your cheeks, resulting in a squeal to escape from your mouth. "now, what do you say to dada, hm?

"fank yous, dada! m'lobe you very much!"

— please dont be afraid to send an ask! I've recently discovered all these little stuff on tumblr and oh my heart can't simply take this! I will be going over my masterlist at some point, so there will be some new faces! with this though, comes the saddened lost of some of the people I wrote for :( also, peep out my taglist that's on my pinned post 👀 I'd appreciate it if you fill that out cause it's easier to keep track of who wants to be tagged!

tagging: @ringsofsaturnnnn @muffinsssss

[just-my-type-x]

Don't Talk Nonsense, Darling - Brad Simpson Imagine

Smut, language

Synopsis: while watching Dune, y/n gets too excited about the movie and Brad wants to calm her down, showing her who's actually the main character of the plot

Gif not mine

Brad's POV

I turn on the TV and grab the remote next to me on the couch. Connor's and Y/N's laughs are loud as they make popcorn in a pan in the open space kitchen. I'm very thankful for it, since i can see everything that's going on amd nobody misses anything. I get up the couch and join the boys and my girlfriend, grabbing my beer from the counter.

"This is such a mess", i sigh when i see a few pieces of popcorn around the stove and some spilt oil. I grab y/n around the neck with my arm and kiss her lightly on her temple. "You're cleaning this", she laughs and she grabs my beer to take a sip

"You help me, it's your fault you didn't have any microwave popcorn in the house"

"No, no, you take Connor to teach him how to clean and you do it together.", i take my bottle back and take a few sips, while we joke around some more about the mess and the now almost burnt popcorn.

We finally settle and have around bowls of popcorn, other snacks and sweets. I play Dune, a very awaited movie for the whole group. For some reason, y/n is more excited for this movie than all of us, which is a first. She's not really a fan of movies. Sure, she enjoys tv shows and can finish one in under a week, but she doesn't have enough attention and patience for a movie.

"I already know the movie is going to be great. The actors ar everything", she chuckles and takes a handful of popcorn from the bowl I'm holding

"I don't remember the last time you were so happy to start a movie", i laugh and watch her face lighten when the movie actually begins

"This is different. My celebrity crush is in it, i thought you knew that!", she pouts and my eyes widen

"Is he really?", i ask

"Oh, come on, Brad, no knowing your girlfriend's celeb crush is like a crime", Tristan jokes and everyone laughs

"Laugh all you want, but Oscar is a very fine man", she answers, all her attention on the man on the screen. I exhale loudly, an "unbelievable" escaping my lips. She playfully hits me with her fist, but i hug her and lean both of us with our backs on the back of the sofa, my arm being around her most of the movie.

At some point throughout the movie, i motion y/n to get on my lap, as the boys wanted a better view of the movie, so we gave them space to get on our couch.

"You can't tell me he's going to break that tooth so everyone dies", disappointed, y/n sighs and looks at me. "That wouldn't be fair!"

I laugh and turn my attention to the tv. "What would be the problem with that? The movie doesn't end there"

"Yeah but the main reason i watch the movie is him. See, i told you he's going to do that!", y/n exclaims while James also gets pissed off at the scenario.

"Well, at least i don't get to hear anything else about another man", i joke and she frowns at me, which I find funny. I kiss her head and hold her tighter in my arms, my mouth close to her ear. "I'm still here, at least", i bite her earlobe and kiss right under her ear. She breaths heavily and leans her head on my shoulder,turning her gaze towards me.

"Yeah, but the movie is not enjoyable anymore.", y/n whines and i roll my eyes.

"Oh, great", i push her up and i get up from the couch to go get something from the kitchen. I look through the fridge for a bottle of wine and grab it as i see it. As bothered as i am because of what y/n said, I'm mad at the fact that the boys are here and they have way too much fun together. Also, I'm slightly in the mood and the fact that Dune is over 2 hours long is a crime for me at this point. And i so top the need with some wine.

I get back to the group with the bottle and the glass, sitting on the floor this time. Involuntarily, y/n starts massaging my neck and between my shoulders. I hold back a relieved moan and just lean my head forward, giving her more access. I take a sip of wine right before she entangles her fingers in my hair and pulls at it lightly. A guttural groan escapes my lips, drawing the attention to me.

"That sounds nice", Tristan laughs along with the boys and i give him the middle finger. While she plays with my hair, i keep making scenarios of us in my bedroom, her on top of me, while i push her down to meet me halfway. I shake the thoughts away and continue watching Dune.

A few hours later, the boys leave and me and y/n start cleaning up. I look at her as she swings her hips over the beat of the song that's playing in the background, singing silently the words. I watch her curves move, ass round and well defined as she wears a thong and leggings, her short tank top revealing a small portion of her waist. I look somewhere else and straighten my voice.

"What was that all about that guy in the movie?", i raise my eyebrow

"Don't act like you don't have a celebrity crush, Bradley. I can name five right now without taking a second breath.", she answers, putting away the bowls of popcorn. I follow her into the living room area and help her with the glasses.

"Yeah but i don't get that excited seeing them, that's all.", we put the dishes into the sink and look at each other for a brief moment. She smirks and i raise my eyebrows. "What?"

"You're so jealous, oh my Gosh.", y/n laughs and leaves the kitchen to change the song. I scoff.

"Ding Ding Ding, what took you so long?"

Mr. Brightside, our cover, starts playing in the background. She comes back to me and cups my face in her hands, giving me a small kiss on the lips. She takes a step back as she starts singing the words to me.

... But she's touching his chest now, he takes off her dress now

While the lyrics go on, y/n cups her breasts lightly and then slides her hands down her body. I lick my lips, the need for her growing bigger and bigger after seeing her do this. She plays with my head and with the state that I'm in and i will definitely let her win of she keeps playing like this. She motions me to take a few steps back and i follow her instructions until i reach the couch and fall on it. I grab her wrists and pull her gently towards me, grabbing her ass when she's close enough for her to sit on me.

... Jealousy, turning saints into the sea, swimming through sick lullabies, chocking on your alibis

She leans herself backwards and i hold her back with my arms to give her support without falling, but she has something else in mind, as she takes one of my arms and moves it from her back, to her waist, up on her breast, squeezing it shortly and wrapping mai hand around her neck. That's when i snap.

I start kissing her hard, biting hard on her bottom lip, my tongue finding its way inside her mouth immediately after. She moans while our tongues dance together and i grab her top to take it off over her head. Wearing no bra, i starts kissing on her chest, licking between her breasts and cupping them to feel their roundness better. I take one of her nipples between my lips, massaging the other breast. Y/N lets her head fall backwards and i grab my own t-shirt to take it off. She starts kissing my neck, licking on my sweet spots.

"Fuck, baby, what did you just do to me?", i breath out and i give her a sign to get up so i could undress her. I take off her leggings and thong the same time and i get up to get rid of my pants and boxers as well. "I want you like this", i help her position herself with her ass pointed towards me, staying on her knees on the couch and her hand grabbing the back of it for support. I get behind her and i kiss her back, goosebumps forming on her hot skin. "Someone's enjoying it. Would it have been the same with someone else?", i whisper in her ear, while my head is playing at her entrence, moving it through her folds. She shakes her head no, but i grab her by the waist tightly. "Answer me, princess. Do you think anybody else would be able to make you this wet? You're dripping on me and i haven't even started."

"Fuck, Bradley. You're so hot when you talk like that. More, please..", y/n begs and without warning, i put my length inside her, bit by bit, stretching her out. "oh, wow, you feel so good from this position.", she moans and i groan, feeling her all warm and juicy. I moan when i go a little bit further inside, feeling how tight she is. I'm eager to get all in, but she really got me mad earlier. I take it out and gasp at the sudden disappearance of the feeling. She groans and looks back at me.

"You didn't answer my question.", i get my hand between her legs, massaging her clit while keeping my eyes locked with her. Her legs start shaking as i touch a sensitive spot.

"Fuck, Brad.", she moans and tightens her grip on the back of the sofa. "Nobody would ever be able to make me feel this good. Nor touch me. Fuck, I'm all yours, baby and you know it.", i speed my movements and support y/n with my arm as her legs can't hold her up anymore. I stop when i feel she's close, earning another mad groan and a look from her.

I position myself again and this time i motion her to move, until she gets all of me inside. I push her down by the small of her back and when my head is inside, i glide her down by holding her by the waist.

"That's it, princess, you got it all.", i start moving, thrusting in her at a slow pace, adjusting with each other. I kiss on her back again, pushing her hair on the side. I reach her neck and leave love bites almost to her shoulder. "Fuck, you're all mine", i start moving faster and harder, feeling how my head reaches her g-spot. My hand drops between her legs again, building up her orgasm.

"It feels so good, don't stop", she cries under my touch and i feel myself getting harder and harder, the most i thrust in her.

"You feel like a goddess, y/n. Taking me so well, being deep enough for me.. Does it feel good when i stretch you out like this?", i take my dick out and push it back all the way, y/n screaming loud.

"It feels like heaven, do it again, baby.", she pleads and i obey. I take it out and push it right back in, moving faster. I angle her body down just a little bit and i grab her above the waist, moving her towards me as i keep thrusting in her.

"The view i just have right now.. Oh my God", i moan and concentrate on having a steady movement, feeling myself getting close. "y/n, fuck, you're so good, such a good girl.", slapping her ass hard, i feel her walls clench around my member. "Baby, I'm so close."

"Me too, Bradley. keep going like this, it feels so good..", she moans and i groan as i feel her tightening even more.

"Come on, love, finish for me. I'm so close, i need to feel you first", my arm falls on the back of the sofa, supporting myself. I do the same with the other one and i use the couch to move myself. With a loud moan, i feel y/n's legs shake uncontrollably. "Good girl, you felt so good..", feeling her clench around me, my orgasm hits soon after. I feel the hotness from my release and i try to steady my breath, before taking my dick out. I look around for a paper towel and luckily, i find one close to us. I clean her as much as possible and let her sit on the couch.

"You broke me in half.", she laughs and i follow, sitting myself down next to her

"I'm glad i did that, it felt amazing. You're amazing.", i kiss her nose and push her into my chest

"Talk to me like that again, it was so hot"

"Whatever you want, love."

[franki-lew-yo]

The Romantic (2009, R, Gothic Fantasy/Horror), aka the most forgotten animated film in the world

What if I told you there was a movie under serious threat of becoming lost media with no clear reason as to WHY it's been lost other than no one has apparently watched it besides me and a few people on Reddit? What if I told you that movie wasn't half bad and would no doubt have some interest peeked if anyone DID know about it?

The name of that movie is The Romantic.

It was released in 2009 and it's Rated R for nudity and sex scenes [insert Robbie Rotten meme here], though none of it too graphic. It was a pet project created by animator Michael P. Heneghan, originally starting as a flash project for his animation class before he expanded it into a feature film. The film was inspired by movies such as The Dark Crystal and Labyrinth, but what I see every time I look at it is a touch of Jhonen Vasquez, Tim Burton, and Roman Dirge- the guy behind Lenore the Cute Little Dead Girl. It's flash animation especially remind me of the puppet-rigged toons of the 2000s (again like Salad Fingers or Lenore). It's not bad, it's just not inherently 'feature film' quality flash, nor is it exceptionally artistic like Sita Sings the Blues in it's simplicity. Like, really, if you happen to find this thing it's not the worst animated project at all it's just amateur for a professional production. I've seen worse flash movies. Heck, if The Romantic were released in separate parts on youtube or Newgrounds as a series (ala Homestuck) I'm sure it would have been really successful and totally in it's element. But it wasn't.

Because next to no one has seen it and I'm lucky to have not only ever seen it when it was available for free but have also found it recently (hush hush, I ain't telling you how) I'm going to actually give you all a plot synopsis under the cut. There will be some details I leave out and I think I've spelled some characters names wrong. It's a bit of a surrealist film as well, so you might need some things explained.

Spoilers ahead:

The Romantic is set in an autumnal, surrealist world inhabited by humans and monsters and ruled by three gods; Po the goddess of love; Pik the god of Hate; and Pjorrc the god of time though Pjorrc was made to live inside a pumpkin moon as everything he touched rabidly aged and died.

((Tapestry art featuring the main three gods of the film.))

A young man (called “Romance” or “The Romantic” by the other characters) performs a bull sacrifice in order to summon Abbledepopa, the unseen creator of the other gods and ‘storyteller’ of the world. The sacrifice does not conjure Abbledepopa but, when Romance spares a monster that was ready to eat him, the monster tells him of a profit named Patience. Patience is a foul-mouthed dwarf living alone with an army of babies who points Romance in the direction of Po.

((Romance outside of Patience's house.))

Romance wants the god’s help because he has fallen out of love with his girlfriend. Po grants him his desire and restores his love only for Romance to return home and find his girlfriend with another man. Blinded by heartache and rage, Romance kills her. He then swears vengeance on the gods for ‘making’ him do it. In the midst of this vow, a corrupt prophet called Fat Daddy kills the queen of Vauxhaul (Romance's home) and her guards, and forges a new body for his newborn son with their bodies. Fat Daddy rallies the townsfolk behind him in supposedly finding the Queen’s murder into follow a new religion called "The Poetic End".

((Romance (right) besides the monster he spared at the beginning of the movie.))

Patience accompanies Romance on his quest and tells him to take Po’s mask, which hides her true face, once he kills her. Romance buys Po’s trust by weaving her a tapestry that tells her story: in the dawn of time Po and Pjorrc were in love. However, Pjorrc gradually became distant and Po became resentful when their daughter, Love, earned Po's original title as the god of romance and love.

In the present day, Romance sleeps with Po for over a year before finally killing her and taking her mask. He and Patience return to his home of Vauxhul only to be chased out by Fat Daddy’s personal army. They flee to Marshallton, the town nearest to the god Pik.

((Romance's hometown of Vauxhul. ))

The king of Marshallton, King Crookie, tells Romance of a prophecy he, Patience, Fat Daddy and all the gods are a part of and that the world is soon to change. Romance then fights and successfully kills Pik when he shows the god of hate his reflection in a mirror King Crookie gave him, but not before losing his hand to Pik.

When Romance comes down the mountain he learns from Patience that nine years have passed since his fight with Pik began. Patience reveals to Romance what Pik saw in the mirror that allowed Romance to take the killing blow; after Love had grown up and married, Po asked Pik to tell her where her husband was always running off to. Pik reluctantly revealed Pjorrc was disguising himself as a human and married a mortal woman. Po found Pjorrc and his pregnant second wife, forcing Pjorrc to leave his human family behind, but not before asking his wife to name their son “Patience”. In retaliation for his treachery, Po proceeded to sleep with fifty men and produce the fifty bastard children in Patience’s house.

((Fat Daddy, the main villain.))

Marshallton and the entire rest of the world has fallen to the rule of Fat Daddy, who captures Romance and Patience. Fat Daddy tortures Patience into telling him how to get to Pjorrc but is unable to convince Romance to take part in his ‘new world’ or give him Po’s mask. Romance and Patience escape and leave the village to be torn apart by the fifty babies Po had, now transformed into veracious monsters after Patience didn’t feed them for the past ten years. Romance confronts Patience when he realizes the latter is Pjorrc’s son. Patience calls Romance out on his mantra of vengeance and points out that all his decisions are his own, not the gods, and instructs him to seek Love herself in Po’s basement. Patience then attempts to confront Pjorrc but is cornered and killed by Fat Daddy before he can do so.

In Po’s basement, Romance finds Love nailed to a wall, her face torn off and half eaten by her deformed husband. Love tells Romance that Po ripped off her daughter’s face in rage over Pjorrc’s infidelity and Pjorrc did not intervene fast enough. Po then threw Love into her basement, turned Love’s husband into a monster, and wore her daughter’s face as a mask - which Romance had broken into pieces moments ago after Patience had shown him his face in King Crookie’s mirror. Romance then finds Pjorrc hanging himself. As he dies, Pjorrc tells Romance to take the hand Fat Daddy had cut off and sew it onto himself, which will in turn help Romance defeat Abbledepopa.

Romance traverses the wasteland and does not find Abbledepopa, but instead a golden loom. Having seen all the destruction he and others had caused, Romance sits upon the loom and accepts his fate as the new ‘storyteller’ of the world, as he begins weaving a new one...

---

I mentioned before the animation quality of the film and why maybe that caused people to overlook it. The only other thing I could complain about on a technical level with The Romantic is it's sound design. Some of the voices and music is a little too quiet and so all these key details I had to go through the film a few times to really piece together. But that leads me to the thing I like about this movie and I'm sure others would to: the lore.

It's very hard to create a new fantasy world w it's own customs, religions, history and rules out of the blue as any YA Harry Potter/Hunger Games ripoff book could tell you. The Romantic is so unique in how it handles the pantheon and culture of these three gods and their kin; really only four or five characters throughout the entire story aren't connected to the gods or prophecy in some way, as there's the main three gods, Abbeldepappa, and the prophets Patience, Love and Fat Daddy, who make up your main cast besides Romance. There's a lot that's intentionally left unexplained and other info that must be explained, like Pjorrc and Po's marriage and Romance's feelings towards the gods, if we want to understand the former. The movie is paced pretty well and knows when to follow up on what, it's just that again some of those animation and editting shortcomings might make it hard to understand...but I don't think THAT hard. Look, if someone can enjoy Starchaser: The Legend of Orin or even better surrealist world-building films ((Fantastic Planet comes to mind)), then I say there's no reason The Romantic wouldn't have a following. There's no other way I can articulate why and what doesn't work about the story except just to recommend you watch it yourselves, but before I get into that I want to talk themes...because I love the themes and tone of The Romantic.

I revisited The Romantic a week before I made myself watch Centaurworld and The Owl House for the first time...and what a week that was~! The Romantic has the vibe of those kinds of shows along with Adventure Time and Infinity Train ((so I hear, I haven't watched the latter)). It's surreal and you'll only marvel at 'woooah wut an acid trip' for so long before you get into the vibe of the universe. It also reminded me substantially of the Broadway musical Hadestown and not just because this movie is also a self-contained, somewhat self aware fable about the relationships between humans and gods - it's very raw in how the characters talk. It's very emotional and blunt in how kind and how cruel they can be, and it doesn't make excuses or really worships any one of them. Romance himself is the world's most likable Incel: he murders a woman he thought he needed to love and blames his emotions on the gods of those passions...except the gods AREN'T the manifestations of love, time, and hate - they simply dictate and oversee it in the lives of men. It's a dynamic I really like in religious works where Gods are powerful but not all knowing or puppet masters to everyone's design- they have morality too and there is only so much you can blame and get from them.

"You made your gods into excuses and your excuses into gods!"

-Patience. This here is a cool quote. I like this quote.

No matter what, The Romantic is not gonna be a film for everyone. We all have our tastes - I think I'm drawn to it and accepting because I've come to love these kind of worlds that used to keep me up at night - these trippy 70s inspired fantasy landscapes given a whole Avatar: The Last Airbender degree of worldbuilding and character worth. It also doesn't feel exploitive in it's violence, it's sexuality, it's grimmness - it doesn't feel like it's trying to hard or going over the top because it happens to be an adult animated film, something that I love in movies like 9 or Hair High but really turns me off in stuff like Sausage Party or Wizards. Whatever go watch The Romantic...

if you can.

-----

When I first saw this film in 2016 it was actually very accessible and was even uploaded to youtube by the creator himself. I don't know WHAT happened to Michael P. Heneghan, but simply put, the man's disappeared...like...REALLY disappeared.

Lookit his IMDB. He has The Romantic and a wapping two other projects to his name. His Twitter isn't very helpful either. He last updated in early 2020 and he says next to nothing about The Romantic. It's so odd that he would one day be happy with the film enough to host it on Vimeo and Youtube but then just cop out.

According to a Reddit user: "On Valentines Day 2011, Heneghan released the film for free online through all kinds of platforms including direct download, bittorrent, Vimeo, and even directly through Archive.org. He even joked about releasing a 300 gig uncompressed version.

I know I watched it on Vimeo probably as recently as 2016. Now I can't find it anywhere. The website is dead, the Vimeo video went private, even the archive.org version has been taken down. It really looks like he wanted to wipe it off the face of the internet. His newer website mentions it, but again, the Vimeo link is dead and even that website is closed for business."

It's weeeird. What happened Michael?

And yes, obviously, other people worked on the movie.

No - I can't find out anything about them either.

I'm betting on three theories at the moment: 1) this film is an SCP or some Candle Cove weirdness with only me and a handful of people ANYWHERE remembering it, 2) something weird is going on w Michael Heneghan and it involves too something about this film. It was a scam or a scheme or a hidden agenda weirdness, 3) Heneghan's doing okay he just doesn't like this film anymore and wants it hidden while he takes a break.

Look, I get it Michael! What was once our life's worth can become cringe as you improve as an artist - you're not the person making the stuff you were ten years ago...but you should still have the film kept alive somehow. Someway.

I'm seriously the only person to have ever made fan art of this movie on the internet. That just doesn't happen, and I don't think I like being in a fandom of one. The Romantic is a testament to the power of design and storytelling > animation quality itself. Too often I see people equate good animation with smooth animation, with a budget with squash and stretch. These animations are good but art is diverse and there's so many kinds of films out there, the value of the medium can't just be in one style/form. There's a lot of honestly wonderful pieces of art out there if you know where to look and you're willing to see where it leads you.

Don't let The Romantic be the most forgotten movie of all time. Reblog this post. Show it to your friends. PM the animation community reviewer people like Saberspark and someone who isn't Saberspark and smuggle them a copy.

Keep telling the story...

[emwritesstuff]

as the world caves in | ch. 9 | bucky barnes x reader

synopsis: You are a ghost story. A former Air Force pilot who had her plane shot down by Germany in 1945, but here you were in 2023, alive and frozen in your 25-year-old body.

You haven’t seen Bucky since the 1940’s, before his fall, before you went on a suicide mission only to come back alive. You aren’t sure reliving those memories – and being a living memory of everything the man has lost – is the best for him.

But you and Bucky won’t be apart for long.

This will loosely follow the plot of TFATWS - so spoilers ahead, specially regarding episode six (finale). Thread carefully!

masterlist | AO3

notes:  thank you everyone for your patience with this chapter. I'm dropping this lil shortie so we can get the story moving. Let's go! (warnings: lil' fluff, lil' angst) (word count: 3K) nine: records

Bucky knocked on your door a few weeks later.

It was late, and you were snug in your pajamas, winding down after a long day. With your identity no longer a secret, the government was in the midst of transferring you to something more… hands-on, and definitely less diplomatic, you were assuming; so much for retirement, but you figured 30 years of it had been more time than you could’ve anticipated.

You almost didn’t hear the soft rapping on wood over Vera Lynn’s mellow singing.

When you finally opened it, you found him standing there, wearing tired eyes and a dark coat. “I’m sorry, I know it’s late, but I started walking and I—"

“When I said you’re welcome anytime, Bucky Barnes, I meant any time.”

A tiny fraction of a smile was offered your way, and you grasped it tight against your heart at the same time you do his hand, pulling him inside.

His fingers lingered on yours, but before you could start thinking about it he pulled away, taking a seat at the edge of your couch. “I finished it. The book.”

Bucky answered your question before you could ask it. “I just came from there. The last one– the last name.”

“Well. Are you alright?” You sat next to him, your knee knocking against his, and his gaze went from the floor, to the spot where your legs touched, and then to you. He knitted his eyebrows, seeming a little incredulous you were even asking.

“I will be.” His hands intertwined on the space between his knees, and you placed a hand ton his shoulder, getting him to look at you again.

“Yes, you will. Do you want to talk about it?”

One corner of Bucky’s lip raised up, and he shook his head. “Is that Vera Lynn?”

You smiled, turning to look at your record player as if Vera herself was sitting next to it. “It is. Takes me back, I guess.”

“It’s all we’d listen to at the front.”

Nodding, you wondered for a second if Bucky remembered dancing to We’ll Meet Again the night before he was shipped off. Even if you weren’t the only girl he had danced with then, you still asked yourself if that memory was burned on his mind as it was on yours.

We'll meet again, don't know where, don't know when. A short-term promise, made back then by hopeful lovers, friends, family members; you had no idea that those lyrics would prove themselves so literal when you and Bucky mouthed them at each other in the middle of a dancefloor.

You let out a breathy chuckle, standing up and beckoning him to where you kept the rest of your vinyl. “Come on. Vera’s starting to feel a little too nostalgic to me.”

Your record collection was pretty extensive, ranging from things of the good ol’ days from the special editions that were still being released nowadays. Bucky joined you on the floor, and together you started to make your way through decades eternized in discs.

“Marvin Gaye.”

You look up from The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust, finding Bucky making a face at the album he was holding. “It’s really good. Do you want to—”

“No. No more Marvin Gaye.”

You furrowed your eyebrows. “You don’t like him?”

“I like Marvin Gaye! Jesus. Marvin is good—Marvin’s jus’ fine,” Bucky rubbed his eyes with his thumb and middle finger, and you finally understood.

“Sam’s been preaching you the word of R&B to you too, huh?”

You giggled at the tired look he gave you and silently took Trouble Man out of his hands, stuffing it back with the rest of the 1970’s.

Years ago, Bucky would be delighted to dive headfirst in the new – your trips to countless science fairs and expositions were enough proof of that – but looking at him now, knowing him as you were starting to once again, you figured that just a dip of the toes was more than enough.

You pulled Frank Sinatra from the 1950’s section.

“I know Sinatra.”

“Do you now?”

You put the record on your player, and Vera Lynn’s longing gave way to Sinatra’s swagger and jazz.

“Do you?” Bucky teased, frowning at the most recent items in your collection. As soon as Frank’s voice filled the silence, he nodded. “Yeah, that’s nice.”

“I do know him! Or did. Met ‘im in 1962.” You plopped next to Bucky, who was shaking his head. “What?”

“Show off.”

“No, just been around. Met people on the way. And, you asked.” Your smirk grew into a grin as Bucky mouthed your words back at you. Then his face fell for a second, and your amusement was quickly replaced by worry. “What is it?”

“Nothing, I guess – I guess I just missed a lot.” The same way one of the corners of his lips tug on his cheek again in his attempt of a smile, melancholy tugs at your heartstrings. “I missed out on everything. And I missed out on you.”

Bucky’s head was low as he spoke and you could see the tremble of his hands, even though he clutched one of your records tightly. Nina Simone, 1960’s.

“M’not going anywhere, you know.”

“You still lived an entire lifetime—”

“I did, yes, thank you for constantly reminding me that I’m over 100 years old.” You shook your head at him, sighing softly when he chuckled.

You couldn’t blame him, for clinging to every bit of past he’d missed while he was in HYDRA’s clutches – you knew that was inevitable, but you wished that such sorrow wasn’t so related to you.

“What are you doin’?” He asked as you summoned a small stool from the side of your shelf and stepped on it.

“I want to show you somethin’.” The thing you were looking for was stored at the very top: a heavy, brown leather suitcase that almost made you lose your balance when you pulled it from the spot it had been sitting in for—honestly, years, many of them.

The contents of the suitcase rattled as you climbed down and sat next to Bucky again. Sinatra still playing, telling his lover I've got you under my skin, I've got you, deep in the heart of me;

You almost laughed from the truth and irony of it.

I'd tried so, not to give in

I said to myself this affair never will go so well

You unlocked the suitcase, revealing the gathered memories inside. Pictures, movie tickets, theater playbooks, receipts, trinkets. All souvenirs of the 80 something years of your life Bucky hadn’t been there to see.

Not organized in the slightest, the keepsakes of your life were tossed together and out of order just as in your memory: photographs of you in uniform, and sometimes in party dresses; of when you bought your house; of the few times you had pets. Posing next to famous people and other important ones whose names weren’t as well known by the world.

As you and Bucky went through each of them, you added a story or an explanation, sometimes both, to fill him in on the details of your life events. He laughed at some, frowned at a lot, stared at you intently for all of them.

“Is this Berlin?”

You hummed, nodding. “1989. That party was great.”

“Party?” Bucky knitted his eyebrows in surprise.

“The city was unified, the wall was being taken down, and everyone was celebrating. I’ve never seen that many bottles of vodka in one place.” You laughed, taking a good look at yourself in the picture.

The 80’s were definitely not your best decade, looks wise. You had tried a perm the year before, and the poodle look was only then starting to dial down. The beginnings of a bruise were starting to creep on your left eye, from the mission you had completed just a few hours before.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been that drunk.”

Bucky’s surprise intensified, his eyes wide. “We can’t get drunk.”

“Yes we can.”

“No, no we can’t.”

“We can, in fact. It’s all a matter of quantity and, well, speed.” You giggled as Bucky’s mouth gaped more.

“And the hangover?”

“Horrible. Like getting shot on the forehead. Comes quickly, too.”

He grimaced, and with one last look – certainly to register your peculiar appearance on his mind – gently put the picture back inside the suitcase. A stack of papers seemed to call out to him and he picked it up, releasing them from the band that held them together carefully.

Postcards of the places you’ve been: a small note to James Barnes and Steve Rogers on the back of each one.

Bucky’s voice faltered. He let out an anguished little sound, probably something that was supposed to be an Oh, or a What, but had no strength to crawl up his throat.

You brought your knees to your chest as you waited for him.

“You—you wrote to us?”

“I did. You can keep those, they’re addressed to you.”

After all this time, you could barely remember the words you wrote in those postcards; all you knew was that some had longer messages, others a simple Wish you were here.

“After we met in Baltimore, I thought that— that you’d have moved on from us.”

From me.

As if that was possible.

“Well, I stopped writing by 2003, give or take. But really,” You sighed. “It’s hard to forget someone when you’ve always been expecting them to come back to you.”

Bucky flipped the postcard from Rome, read the writing and smiled wistfully at it. “And, I did.”

“You did. And staying away was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but—”

“But you’re annoyingly stubborn.” His jaw tightened, then relaxed when he smirked. “I mean, I get it – If the roles were reversed, I’d leave you rebuild your life without me like a self-sacrificing idiot too.”

Alright. That was fair.

Shaking your head, you watched as he slipped the postcards in his pocket, an amused expression on his face.

“That was… a big mistake. Something a self-sacrificing idiot would do,” You screwed your eyes shut in shame, opening them when Bucky chuckled. “but now, I’m right here. And so are you.”

His stubble scratched the soft skin of your palm when you reached for him, and you continued. “We’re a little out of place in this century, that much is true, but if I’m being honest… I’m getting tired of yearning for the past, Buck.”

Good old times – sometimes really good, sometimes bad, every one of them old – tucked away in your heart like your records were tucked in neatly in their shelf, organized by year. As you went through the decades, your enhanced body eternizing you like marble, your heart seemingly stayed at that army camp overseas. Or maybe Sergeant Bucky Barnes had taken it with him, only for them to be frozen together, leaving you with an empty hole in your chest.

You lived your life longing for that missing piece, the one with blue eyes and the dashing smile and the skilled feet.

The one that in many other stories was the one that got away, the one who now believed he was somebody else, but had brought your heart back with him all the same.

The very heart that nearly leapt out of your chest when Bucky rested his forehead against yours.

You’ve never been this close – there isn’t an ounce of past in the gesture. His eyes being tightly closed kept him from seeing the surprise on your eyes and then how they fell to his lips for a millisecond. Then, those lips brushed against yours in a featherlike touch.

I would sacrifice anything, come what might

For the sake of having you near

He pried himself off you when you exhaled, as if your very breath had electrocuted him.

“M’sorry. I—I didn’t—” He said as you stared at the back of his neck, and the shock gives way to disappointment.

I didn’t mean to. Or maybe: I didn’t want to.

“That’s—it’s okay.” You clapped your hands on your knees, still feeling the prickle of his facial hair on them, and got up to change the music.

There was no doubt Bucky was touch starved, and that he probably craved the closeness that comes with a lover. He sought that for a fleeting second in Sam’s sister, and now in you. No point in dwelling on what it might have meant.

Right?

Looking at Bucky, his expression was overcast, furrowed eyebrows as he watched you from his spot on the floor. You offered him a gentle smile, and the crease on his forehead eased up slightly.

Right.

Don't you know little fool, you never can win

The record player made a scratching sound as you replaced Frank Sinatra with your go-to jazz compilation. Instrumental.

No lyrics.

There was one thing you’ve always been good at, regarding the infatuation with Bucky Barnes that has taken over your heart for almost a century now: locking the feelings away and stepping into the shoes of the best friend.

Besides, you’ve said it yourself: no more yearning for the past. Hopefully you and Bucky would be able to do that soon enough.

At that moment, however, you needed to feel the burn of whiskey down your throat and pretend it’ll heal the calcinating rejection spreading through your chest.

The guilt you found in Bucky’s eyes as he watched you sweep around your hardwood floors made you pour a glass for him.

He took it gratefully, frowning when you bottomed the whole thing up.

“There’s a lot in here.” He tapped the edge of the suitcase, skillfully steering the conversation in the direction of the more palatable, calm territory it was in before.

The sight of your autobiographical collection made you smile.

“An entire lifetime,” You said, fishing your dog tags from the bottom. “I suppose that’s where it started. Or at least, where thisstarted.”

Bucky took them reverentially, running his thumb over the imprint of your name and numbers.

He reached for his neck, producing from under his Henley the same type of metal chain he was holding in his hands. The fact that he still wore his like that sent a sharp blow to your lungs, almost knocking the air out of you.

His face softened, a smile so beautiful spreading across his lips, so much that your chest clenched in protest because it was simply not fair, how he still had you entirely.

He deposited both of your dog tags in your hands, and that’s when you saw it, and remembered it.

“Won’t we get in trouble for this?”

“Do you care?”

“Well…No.” You sighed, already resigned. And a little excited.

Bucky knew you well: it had been too long of being a good little soldier when all you were used to was the rush of being a hellion.

“And that is why, sugar, that I’m doing this with you, and not with Steve.”

The words made your heart soar, but you were sure to recapture it before it could fly away too high, still too attached to the sensation of the take-off to clip its wings.

You liked flying.

“And because Steve hasn’t been successful in his enlisting efforts. Yet.”

Bucky looked at you from behind his eyebrows, a reprimand hiding in his eyes, but he decided to shove his uniform hat on your head instead. You grumbled, calling him a jerk under your breath.

It was the night before Bucky was drafted to England. He looked handsome in his uniform, a shining, polished star, brighter than the sun even under the dim streetlight you two stood under.

After bringing his and Steve’s dates home (yours was lost to another boxing match along the way – not that you were crying about that) Bucky had decided he was going to stay up all night, because, in his words, he could sleep when the war was over. Or, more realistically, in the ship on the way to England.

So there you two were, illuminated by street lamps and moonlight, visiting the façades and front windows of your favorite places in Brooklyn like drifters in the night.

Bucky still concentrated on his task, his shoulder hunched slightly to block your sight.

“Let me see! Bucky!”

“ ’Sposed to be a surprise! I’m almost done.”

You huffed, crossing your arms. “It’s not like I haven’t seen ‘em before.”

“You gotta be more patient. Here.”

He dropped your dog tags on your hand. You displayed the small steel plates on your palm, scanning your eyes over the two. One of them, of course, had your name, number, blood type, next of kin – an aunt you’ve never met – and address.

The other had Bucky’s.

James B Barnes. 32557038.

He slipped his own chain over his head, the plate with your name clinking against his.

You brought the tips of your fingers to your lips, feeling a smile begin to form onto them.

“I forgot we did this. I haven’t looked at these in so long.”

You had stopped wearing your dog tags the day the war had ended – Bucky was gone then, Steve too, and the weight of his dog tags slamming against your chest was too much to bear – your heart was already heavy with its own engraving of their memories.

“Steve had a lecture prepared when he gave mine back.” Bucky chuckled when you looked up at him, incredulous.

You shook your head, half exasperated and half amused. “Good grief, Steve.”

“Y’know how he is. Was,” He trailed, lips twitching as they formed a thin line.

You reached for him, your hand hovering in the space between you for a second before Bucky took it, lacing your fingers. Scooting closer, you let your cheek rest on his shoulder.

“He’d be glad we’re reunited.” You said, raising your head to peek at him and the newfound upwards curl of his lip. “And mortified we’re still bickering.”

Bucky smiled and squeezed your hand. “Old people. Old habits.”

Laughter bubbled out of your chest, and you realized a few things.

In that moment, it didn’t matter – the heartache, the unrequited side of your love. It was just a fact, a fact of life, of your life, that you a lot of the times loved him as more than your best friend. You loved him. And that was the core of it, the most important fact.

And you knew he loved you – you had each other – in this big, ever-changing, modern world, you had Bucky and Bucky had you.

You sat in comfortable, familiar silence until your eyelids grew heavy and you felt yourself drifting in and out of consciousness.

“You dozin’ on me, sugar?”

“It’s been a long day.” You said with your eyes still closed, feeling him chuckle beside you.

“Tell me about it. I can go—”

“You know damn well you should stay.” You patted his arm and hoisted yourself up from the floor. “I’ll get the pull-up ready for you.”

As you sauntered towards the office, ignoring his pleads and protests that he’s got it, he doesn’t need sheets or anything, you put your dog tags back on.

They jingled lightly against your heart.

Maybe you didn’t have to leave all of the past behind to start building something good and new, after all.

[swiftwordsforwhattheyare]

What I Took from Colditz

WARNING: SPOILERS. I will be giving out the plot. If you're interested in the movie, better to go watch it THEN read my thoughts and make a post of your own so I can hear what you think.

So I took a rainy day yesterday to watch Colditz, the 2005 British 2-part miniseries starring Damian Lewis, Sophia Myles and Tom Hardy. Let's just say it was a great movie to watch on a drizzly, cloudy, depressing day.

Let me preface this way: I love the WW2 period, and I love reading any book or seeing any movie set in the period. But the driving incentive to see this movie was Damian Lewis (-;) The only thing I'd seen him in was Band of Brothers (in which his performance was STELLAR) and I really wanted to see him in another role. And one quite unlike Dick Winters, which this movie fit the bill. So I probably would have seen this movie had not Damian been in it, because of the historical setting, drama, and let's face it, fascinating storyline, but Damian was the reason I saw it ASAP. So I come to it with a liking for the actor, though he does portray a bit of a jerk. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

So even if you haven't seen the movie, chances are you know already the synopsis:

Three escaped POWs escaped from their camp and are about to be recaptured at the border of Switzerland. Only one, Scotsman Nicholas McGrade (Lewis) has a shot at getting away. Before he goes, his comrade Jack Rose (Hardy) asks him to look up his girl whom he met right before leaving London, and tell her... Tell her what? He doesn't expressly say. He'd told McGrade earlier he regretted not asking Lizzie (Myles) to marry him. But he doesn't tell McGrade what to tell her. Just says to find her.

McGrade gets back to London, gets promoted to Lieutenant, and is excited to get back to his life. He looks up Lizzie, tells her about Jack, and we can see he has a liking for her pretty much from the start.

Meanwhile, Jack is taken to Colditz, a castle where Germans are keeping POWs. He and his buddies start escape plans immediately. Their story runs parallel to McGrade's in England, but I'm going to focus on McGrade's.

McGrade sees Lizzie at a club one night and after some conversation about Jack (she can't remember what he looks like and she feels guilty ) and some pretty adorable flirting, they dance. We can see Lizzie is unnerved by Nick, and when he tries to kiss her, she leaves. He walks her home. Of course. Worked up and high on emotion, Nick tells her "we can do anything we want. We can be anything we want. We can have anything we want. I want you." At which point Lizzie kisses him, then runs away, distressed because of Jack.

I think it's important to legitimize that Lizzie and Nick had feelings for each other. He was the bad guy, he did terrible things, but I don't believe falling in love with Lizzie was one of them. I know it was his buddy's girl, but Lizzie also was attracted to him as well. He had much greater blunders to commit.

After their kiss, Lizzie wants to put distance between them. "I don't want you to come here again," she tells him. Here is where Nick makes his first AWFUL error, taken with the desire to have Lizzie: he forges a letter telling her Jack is dead. This is terrible and heinous, no way around it. Did Nick really think Jack wouldn't come back??

Well, his ploy works in bringing Lizzie, right to his door. And here is where I will clarify that Nick does not push or coerce her at all, to his credit. (I mean, beyond making her think her fellow is dead, which is probably worse than coercing her...) One blogger said something to the effect of "Nick convinces her to share his bed" which is not what happened. Lizzie came right to him. And despite his deception and all that, Lizzie does love him. I think that's important.

With Jack out of the way, Nick has Lizzie all to himself. They appear to be quite happy together. And then a Colditz man escapes, to the anxiety of Nick. He sees Nick and Lizzie together and recognizes her from a drawing he did for Jack in Colditz. Nick keeps falling lower and lower, meanwhile, mistake upon mistake. The escapee from Colditz knows his dirty secret and says so, and Nick kills him. He doesn't mean to. But it's done nonetheless, and Nicks wrongdoing strangles his happiness with Lizzie.

Jack escapes from Colditz. Nick finds out, and gives up the name of the safehouse he's staying at, betraying his country and their cause. Knowing he's soon to be caught, he asks Lizzie to marry him and go with him to America. "I want to be wherever you are," she replies, sealing their engagement with a kiss.

They don't make it out of the country. Jack finds them, and the two men have a face off. Nick ends up shot by fellow soldiers for treason, and it's Lizzie who comforts him, calling him a bastard even as she holds him close as he dies.

Jack pursues Lizzie, but she is shaken, distant and confused. "I don't know if I have any love left to give," she tells him. Her love affair with Nick haunts her, as I'm sure it did the rest of her life. As I said, I'm sure she really did fall in love with Nick. What they had was much different than the attachment she had to Jack, whom she met only three weeks before he left for the war. There is not a defined ending for Lizzie and Jack.

People who are at all familiar with the history of Colditz as well as the old Tv show are usually quite disappointed in this movie. Many claim it was basically just a setting for a dramatic love story, and it did history a disservice. I enjoyed it because I watched it just for the love story (hey, it pays to be honest) and I like stories set in WW2. I will say though that it gave more screen time to the plight of the POWs than critics led me to believe. Anyhow, I enjoyed it for what it was, being fond of romance, drama, angst and oh, yeah, Damian Lewis. It was nice to see him in a role where he was exuberant, outgoing, and yeah, human (cause face it: Dick Winters is a heavenly being of some sort). And he did a Scottish accent that was quite impressive to me. (Gee whiz, I've heard this Brit American, and Scottish now! How does he DO that?!)

It's a heck of a dramatic, frustrating, depressing story. Remember it on the next rainy, gloomy day.

[dukereviewsmovies]

Duke Reviews: Robin Hood

Hello, I'm Andrew Leduc And Welcome To Duke Reviews Where We Are Continuing Our Look At Disney...

By Talking About Disney's 21st Animated Feature, Robin Hood...

No Synopsis Today, Let's Dive On Into Robin Hood...

We Start With The Opening Of A Book As We Meet Our Narrator, Allan-A-Dale (Who's Not Only Voiced By Roger Miller But Is A Rooster)...

Who (After Singing Our Intro Song, Which You Just Heard) Introduces The Tale Of Robin Hood (Voiced By Brian Bedford) And Little John (Voiced By Oh, What A Shocker, Phil Harris) With Our Next Song...

(Start At 0:13)

And It's A Good Song, Probably One Of The Most Memorable Of This Movie...

Anyway, One Day While Robin And John Are In A Tree, A Royal Coach With Prince John (Voiced By Peter Ustinov) And Sir Hiss (Voiced By Terry Thomas) Passes Through Sherwood....

So, Knowing That The Carriage Is Laiden With Riches, They Decide To Disguise Themselves As Fortune Tellers In An Attempt To Rob John Of His Gold...

Placing A Bounty On Robin And John's Heads, John Makes The Sheriff Of Nottingham (Voiced By Pat Buttram) His Personal Tax Collector, Taxing Everyone In Nottingham Including A Famiy Of Rabbits...

But Luckily, Robin Gets Back Some Of Their Money And Even Gives A Little Rabbit Named Skippy, His Hat And Archery Kit Of His Own For His Birthday...

Going Out To Test It, Skippy Ends Up Firing An Arrow Into The Grounds Of Maid Marian's Castle. Sneaking Inside, Skippy And The Children Meet Maid Marian (Voiced By Monica Evans) And Lady Cluck (Voiced By Madame Morrible From Wicked)...

There, Marian Reveals That Her And Robin Were Childhood Sweethearts But She Has Not Seen Robin For Years, But Despite That, Cluck Tells Her Not To Give Up On Her Love For Robin...

Visiting Robin In Sherwood, Friar Tuck Tells Him That Prince John Is Hosting An Archery Tournament And That The Main Prize Is A Kiss From Maid Marian So With Robin Disguising Himself As A Stork He Enters The Tournament While Little John Disguises Himself As The Duke Of Chutney To Get Near Prince John...

But As The Old Saying Goes "Fool Me Once, Shame On Me But Fool Me Twice, Shame On You" And Robin's Identity Gets Discovered By Prince John Who Has Him Arrested To Be Sentenced To Execution, Despite Maid Marian's Pleas...

But When Little John Threatens Prince John, It Leads To A Fight Between Prince John's Soliders And The Townspeople, All Of Which Escape To Sherwood Forest....

Later That Night, Robin And Maid Marian Fall In Love Again As Our Next Song Plays...

And It's All Right...

It's Not Very Memorable, In Fact I'm Not Even Sure I Would Call It A Song. But Still If You Like It I Guess It's All Right...

Meanwhile, The Townsfolk Hold A Troubadour Festival Leading To Our Next Song...

And It's A Good Song, I Absolutely Enjoy It And I Can't Help But Dance To It Every Time I Hear It...

Hearing The Music From His Castle, Prince John Is Enraged To The Point That He Raises The Taxes So Badly That Half Of The Townsfolk Who Couldn't Afford To Pay Went To Jail, This Leads To Our Next Song...

(Start At 1:53)

And It's Okay...

While Again Not Very Memorable, It's Just Not My Favorite Song Of This Movie..

It Gets Even Worse When The Sheriff Of Nottingham Takes A Coin From Friar Tuck's Church, He Lashes Out At The Sheriff For Taking From The Church, Which Leads To Tuck Being Arrested For Attacking A Lawman, Interphering With His Legal Duties And High Treason To The Crown...

And Knowing That Tuck Is In League With Robin Hood, Prince John Orders Friar Tuck To Be Hung, Knowing That Robin Will Come And Rescue Him...

However, When They Learn Of John's Plot, They Decide To Sneak In At Night So, Little John Can Get The Prisoners Out While Robin Steals All Of Prince John's Money But When Hiss Spots Robin Fleeing Chaos Insues..

Little John And Skippy Fear That Robin Is Lost But He Eventually Surfaces Safely After Using A Reed As A Breathing Tube As Prince John Sucks His Thumb When He Realizes He Burnt Down His Mother's Castle...

Shortly Afterwards, King Richard Returns To England And Places His Brother And Sir Hiss Under Arrest As He Allows Maid Marian To Marry Robin Hood, Turning That Outlaw Into An In-Law...

Now There's Something I Wish I Didn't See, Anyway, That's Robin Hood And It's Okay

While Not Really A Bad Film, It Does Have It's Moments And Good Songs, It's Just That Of All The Films In What I Like To Call The Silver Age Of Disney Animation, It's Just Not My Favorite Of The Bunch...

But I Will State That If There Was A Film That Is Like The Status Of Our Nation Now, This Is It...

People Are Sick And Dying Due To Coronavirus And Our Government Is Overtaxing Us All, While The Phoney King Of Washington Sits On His Throne, Sucking His Thumb And Crying Out For His Mom...

Anyway, Either Way I Say See It...

Now Next Week On Duke Reviews, We Are Not Continuing Our Look At Disney, Why? Because This Thursday Is The Beginning Of October And You Know What That Means....

It's Monsterween Time...

But Don't Worry, We'll Be Back In November With A Couple More Disney Reviews Before Moving Into Duke's Holiday Reviews In December

But, Till Then, This Is Duke, Signing Off...