#i'm giving her the benefit of the doubt bc she's on the ''not everyone has (mental illness)'' side of things. and yet.

[wetpapert0wel]

sometimes i wish shinigami eyes had a middle option for people who aren't explicitly transphobic, but who are definitely not trans friendly.

[rhemaji]

every jax theory i have as of now

Jax is gonna try to drown himself in the digital lake or already has tried and when this gets shown we'll see what his avatar looks like when he can't breath The way Goose threw in lil hints abt Kinger what with him wanting to be in his dark pillow fort and his interest in an insect collection, makes me think certain lines that sorta seemed like throwaway jokes will wrap back around to basically being easter eggs upon rewatch.

The reason why I theorize he either will try to drown himself or has already tried before is because he refuses to show anyone what it looks like when he can't breath and [thanks to my friend Leftsei for pointing this out] he instinctively avoids the water in episode 4.

also Goose has said before that he didn't react well to first arriving in the circus and i like to believe he tried to leave by dying before he realized that doesn't work. And this may be really far-fetched and fucked but i also think Goose's sketch of Jax throwing up is actually him coughing up water

Pomni will try to reach out to Jax but he'll reject her and say she's being cringe, pushing away the only circus member still willing to give him the benefit of doubt.

Jax finds out that Caine's stability is what holds the circus together and will selfishly try to break him so it can all finally end. This isn't one i'm super tied to bc it feels a bit dramatic and I don't have any evidence in the show or outside of it, but i think to some extent Jax will try to end it for everyone else once his bitterness and self-inflicted loneliness REALLY kicks in.

aaaaand finally

Jax will be the only current circus member to abstract [womp womp]

This is just based on vibes and what would be the most interesting to watch build up to. The aftermath of him abstracting would also be fun to see imo, i like angst and stories that explore the intersection of grief and confusion that can come about from losing someone who treated you poorly. I love Jax and if what I think'll happen does end up happening, I'll be so damn happy bruh. Even if the actual show ends up being different, I can't wait to see him get worse! ^^

[spurgie-cousin]

Tessie didn’t even get to blow out her own candles. If you watch the video, Nurie’s hair gets blown from her right side, where Nathan is, and then he comments that “no spit got on the cake”. And all Tessie can do in the video is give like a “oh yeah ok sure” gesture with her hands and giggle (and not a “wtf it’s not your birthday, Nathan” glare) because Jill’s got the camera in her face.

Is this something they do to each other regularly? Blow out the candles on each other’s cakes? Like ok Nathan I don’t blame you if you don’t want to play host to your wife’s entire family when you’re about to have a new baby but if you want to be passive aggressive about it, maybe aim it at the grown ass woman who dragged everyone to your house and not the 17 year old?

And THEN Jill asks one of the toddlers “is that Nurie’s cake?” Like holy fuck this is the first time I’ve seen a Rod birthday that is barely about the birthday kid - and that says a lot considering Gabe(?) has to share his with a tent revival and leftover cake

I know that was so bizarre??? It definitely isn't a thing they usually do.

Esp since they'd been struggling to light the candles while tessie waited patiently, with a wide smile pasted on since Jill had the camera in her face, and then the second they finally got them lit, Nathan blew them out. I'm sure he was trying to be funny but it was a cringey as hell and kind of mean.

I definitely think Nurie is the favorite but I'll give Jill the benefit of the doubt with the name thing, just bc I only have 4 animals and I sometimes call them by the other's name lol. so I can't imagine how often that'd happen with 12 kids. I think if she really consciously was trying to refer to Nurie, she would've said "mama's cake" or something since she was talking to one of her kids.

I think the more shitty thing is that Jill couldn't even write a caption for Tessie's bday video without comparing her Nurie 🫤.

[lionheartedmusings]

i've been thinking about this on and off all morning, but i think i pinpointed the reason q!forever / /q!jaiden storyline happening right now has left me so frustrated, and why ultimately… it's good storytelling, i just dislike it. this is nothing against the ccs, i have the utmost respect to them, i am critising fictional characters.

a) there's two women on the server, and while q!forever's criticism of q!jaiden most likely wouldn't have gotten such a kneejerk reaction from me, when juxtaposed with the notion of a grieving mother being obsessive / suspicious for expressive her grief privately… it's hard to swallow. and hey, i firmly believe q!forever would be suspicious of ANYONE in q!jaiden's position, so it's not on him. it's just uncomfortable to watch as a viewer bc god forbid women express strong emotions in a way people find distasteful.

b) it makes emotional sense from q!forever, but no logical sense, and yet he justifies his suspicion with logic. nah, fam, you're just deeply traumatised -- that's okay. but what q!cellbit did was sneaky, slimy, and giving god complex (i love q!cellbit but dude is fucked). q!jaiden has been infinitely more honest in the brief interactions they had than q!cellbit ever was. you don't have to agree with her or her motives, but if q!cellbit got the benefit of the doubt so should she.

c) his paranoia is understandable, but extreme to the point where suspicion is becoming fact and it's just… an uncomfortable watch. i'm a sub, i've been watching the streams daily since the brazillian creators arrived, but man it was rough. everyone is being painted with the same brush, and his stubbornness and unwillingness to talk to bad (because saying what you think and not listening to the other side isn't talking) is deeply frustrating. q!max suddenly being more trustworthy than baghera and bad is wild, and he's giving these people very little grace. it's jarring.

d) in the end, i don't think this will have consequences if his behaviour persists, but i hope it does. i want to see characters go off the deep end in their pursuit of what they think is right, and burning all bridges until they realise they're alone. if that's where the story is going, i hope q!forever absolutely loses his shit bc it's… where it's headed right now.

[louisaguy]

my thoughts on the river/louisa thing

this is not a post saying that anyone should agree with these thoughts, or that any other take is wrong. just getting my feelings out because everyone keeps talking about it lol.

some spoilers for later books (i'm not sure which one bc i haven't read them lol i'm just going off things i've heard)

oh BOY, am i conflicted about the idea of river/louisa going romantic. the thing is, i love their relationship so so so much as it is now. i don't think turning a platonic relationship romantic always HAS to ruin it, but... it's also true that there's no quicker way to get me to hate two characters i previously loved than with an unnecessary romantic subplot. i think their relationship-- especially the way louisa treats river-- is really unique and interesting right now, and i worry that that uniqueness would be dampened or overwritten if they went romantic. i love how louisa really, deeply cares about him, but also doesn't hesitate to be honest to the point of bluntness with him; see "i think he used you. a lot. and i think if it were the other way around, he wouldn't really care." (that scene still obsesses me. she's so caring with him, so defensive of him, and yet at the same time she doesn't sugarcoat anything to make him feel better. she's blunt in saying what he doesn't want to hear but she's doing it in order to defend him, because she cares so deeply about him).

i worry that if they were paired together, that dynamic would change, and they would fall into a more stock relationship, one that would damage louisa's character in particular, either taking the teeth out of her and making her overly sweet, or pushing her into the typical "nagging wife" stereotype... y'know, always fussing at him, criticizing him for doing dumb shit. that's my fear about what might happen. but, to be perfectly honest, i don't think it will. the show writers have been really good about treating their characters with a lot of respect (more so than the books sometimes do [i read the first book and have seen snippets of the others].... lol), so i honestly am willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. if they wanna go in a river/louisa direction, i'm not gonna be NOOOO about it, i'm gonna see where they're going with this. i trust them to be able to make it work in a way that doesn't step on louisa's character. i mean, my best case scenario for romantic river/louisa is that their relationship is like identical to how it is now but they just kiss sometimes LMAO. i'd be cool with that! that sounds good to me!

i will say that i am almost rooting for river/louisa a little bit? solely because i don't want river/sid LMAO. i haven't read the later books, but i heard through the grapevine that in the books she comes back and her and river get together. i really hope that's something the show diverges from, bc i really DON'T WANT that. i know it's not really fair to judge sid against all the other characters who we've had whole seasons to get to know, since she was really only in the first 3 eps, but i found sid to be very boring. idk, maybe she'd be better if she came back and they had more time to flesh her out, but what we've seen of her so far? she feels very cookie cutter to me. like she's just there to be river's manic pixie dream girl. which like... boring. seen it before. i'd MUCH rather stick with what river and louisa have going on.

the only way i could see myself enjoying sid is if she gets to have a character and an arc and an internal world completely divorced from being river's gf... like if she came back and had several seasons on her OWN telling her own stories before she was paired with river. that's the only way i could see myself being ok with it.

but hey, y'know who's already had several seasons on her own not paired with river when she's allowed to develop her own arcs and internal world? louisa. which is why i think the idea of them getting together is something i'm willing to try out, at the very least-- i'm willing to trust that the writers are good enough to their characters that she will be allowed to KEEP having an internal world outside of river even if they got together. the writers have been very good to their characters so far. i'm willing to keep trusting them, for now.

i mean, look. the long and short of it is, if i was in total and complete control, i would want no romantic relationships for river. no romantic relationships for anyone in the cast, really. because i find them quite often to be overly reliant on stock relationship types that make the stories being told feel often a bit cookie cutter or repetitive... that's just my opinion. there are so so SO many good and interesting and fascinating stories being told here between the platonic relationships-- any combo of the slow horses makes me literally insane to think about. river and louisa, shirley and marcus, catherine and lamb, lamb and RIVER, even coe and shirley now... i think there's so many varied and unique types of relationships at play in this one little fucked up family unit, i'd love to explore those more rather than wasting time on a romantic subplot that, more likely than not, is going to feel identical to 10 other couples on TV right now (TO ME).

so, if i get total dictator control, i say no romance. but if we MUST have a romantic subplot for river-- which, ok, he's the conventionally attractive lead, i suppose it was inevitable even if i don't have to like it sigh-- i would much rather have him paired with the person he's had two and a half seasons to build his relationship with (though they didn't interact this season nearly as much as i wanted them to rip) and who he thus has an already established deep bond and really interesting dynamic with.... rather than his MPDG from season 1. sorry i'm not looking forward to sid coming back lmao. part of me hopes they change it and just don't bring her back at all. (i mean the actress is on house of the dragon now and that's blowing up, so who knows if they even have a contract with her to GET her back...)

(i'd be equally worried about them slotting louisa into a role that used to be occupied by sid in the books-- louisa and sid are NOT the same character and i'd worry about louisa feeling un-louisa-like when making decisions that originally belonged to sid... but again, i have a lot of faith in the writers to make it work. i think i can trust them to justify why louisa would make these decisions too and make it still feel true to her character.)

anyway. tldr; top choice river isn't paired with anyone and i keep getting to enjoy my little gen sandbox of slough house. but if he must be paired with someone, i'd like it to be louisa (just make it their current relationship but they kiss sometimes! that's allowed!).

(to be honest, putting the romance of it all aside, i do think river and louisa could make very good life partners... i could see them moving in together, helping each other keep their lives together lol. and i think it would be very sweet to see them continue to build those lives into the future with each other-- planning around each other, y'know, putting each other first. but i digress. to me, all of that is a completely separate thing from their relationship being romantic or not. it could happen either way.)

(also this doesn't really have to do with the thing in the trailer bc i've been thinking these thoughts for A While and louisa didn't even look into the kiss in the trailer anyway lmao, i just. i've seen everyone talking about this lately and it's made me want to get my thoughts out)

(if you've made it to the end of this long ass ramble, thank you for reading, ily, have a cookie 🍪)

[blackjackkent]

Everyone has Comments(tm) about Rakha having slurped the tadpole.

Rakha's whole current party (Shadowheart, Lae'zel, and Wyll) are NOT happy about it:

"It was bad enough having just one of those tadpoles forced upon us. I can scarcely believe you actually inflicted another on yourself..."

"Kaincha! No good will come of devouring a ghaik worm, no matter what you might think."

"Gone gods - watching you consume that tadpole was more disgusting than the tadpole itself."

Rakha feels a little like she's in that meme of the people yelling at the cat at the dinner table.

(This really is kind of stressful for her because Lae'zel and Wyll are the people whose opinion she trust most generally, and she's going against them because of the Dream Guardian. It's also kind of funny bc I am starting to suspect Lae'zel and Wyll might have a smidge of unspoken competition going on, since Lae'zel seems to have caught some kinda feelings for Rakha and Wyll seems to be starting to connect with her too. But they are most DEFINITELY allied in thinking she's being a dumbass right now. :P )

Gale and Astarion are a little more chill about the whole thing:

"Well, no tentacles yet. I suppose we can consider that a success."

"Come on then, don't leave me in suspense. How are you feeling? No errant tentacles? No sudden cravings for a more cerebral diet?"

"No signs of ceremorphosis taking effect, if that's your concern."

"I was rather more curious to know what benefits the tadpole might have bestowed, but no doubt the benefits of your change in diet will become apparent soon enough."

But of course the most interesting was Karlach's, which also blindsided me with feels:

"You really did it, huh? Not worried about adding more illithid into the mix? Well, what can I say. You look fine. Smell fine. Seem fine. If you got a little boost from the tadpole, who am I to begrudge you."

(Me, watching this: Aw, Karlach is such a sweetheart and I love her so mu-- wait. Why does she look so sad?)

"In fact... got any going spare?"

"If I did, would you accept it?"

"You know, I think I would. Bit surprising, but I'm starting to see the silver lining of this whole parasite situation."

She sounds SO sad saying this, you guys. :( I'm fucked up realizing she's thinking about this all the way back here at the beginning. Fuck.

Rakha gave her a worm. (In dialogue, at least; I didn't actually have one left to give her.)

"Thanks, soldier. I'll use it well. Promise."

😭Weh.

[seabirdtxt]

Hi, I’m Bird. welcome to my sideblog! i hope you have a good time :) thanks for reading! 🩵

Ask box is: On hold

WIP tracker

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Rules & TOS:

- I am using this blog as a place to put my self-indulgent fandom fics. i don't proofread or beta my stuff so if i make typos no i didn't 🫡

- blank blogs please do not +follow! i will assume you are a bot and block/softblock you. You can remain empty/anon as long as you have some profile customization and maybe a post/reblog or two

- you can send asks/requests and i'll tackle 'em asap but please don't expect too much of the social aspect from me, i struggle with socialization like a feral cat

- i write reader fics. this means: gender neutral, no physical description/indicators, no gender-biased nicknames clothes or scenarios, you/yours and they/them pronouns only.

- do not call my Reader she/her, or any fem-aligned nicknames. im dead serious, this is a ‘block on sight’ thing, it kicks up my dysphoria and it's the same reason i won't read fem!reader fics. i won't block for the first time, but if you commented on something or sent an ask/request and I deleted/didn't respond, this is probably why. I'm giving y'all the benefit of the doubt that maybe you didn't check my page first though! but continued behavior will earn a block .

- i’m not holding a taglist atm, you either perceive me or don't. (if i ever write smth longer that warrants a taglist i’ll be sure to mention it!)

- no bigotry or discrimination allowed, please use your good judgement when consuming media, etc. there will be no bitchin in my kitchen!

- no reposting, copying, or heavily referencing! plaigarism is the 8th cardinal sin 😊 yes this includes feeding my writing to AI. don't do it.

- re: above ^ making stuff inspired by/expanding on concepts is totally fine though! i'm inviting everyone to come play in my sandbox :3c if you do, please tag me! i'd love to see and rb from you 🥰 (AI is still 100% off the table though)

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Request Rules:

currently in genshin/sagau fandom so mostly stick to those themes please! (and do let me know if you want canon or other AU settings! otherwise i'll assume sagau)

i won't do crossovers sorry! i'm not too knowledgeable on many other media or fandoms and i'd rather not butcher something im not familiar with!

willing to write both platonic and romantic! (specific character romance with the male characters only, sorry, but platonic is free game!)

i write kinda slow tbh, so please don't send me anything that is time sensitive or has a deadline bc i probably won't make it in time :')

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General Tags:

Writing -> #seabird.txt

Doodles -> #seabird.png

Asks/replies -> #seabird.inbox

Personal -> #seabird.exe

Reblogs -> #seabird.rb

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Masterlist below the cut:

Glitch in Irminsul AU

SAGAU setting, where the Irminsul tree behaves like a GIT repository, and the Creator's arrival accidentally merged old branches into the current data.

Blog Tag - [p1] [p2] [p3] [p4] [p5]

[hc1]

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Bloodletting AU

SAGAU cult au, the Creator descends to Teyvat with no obvious godly powers and is rejected by the acolytes, until it's discovered that their golden blood has strength-enhancing properties.

Blog Tag - [p1] [p2]

[rb1] [rb2]

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Voice of God AU

SAGAU cult au, set pre-isekai. The Shouki no Kami is powered up and connected to Scaramouche, who then experiences a sudden jarring connection to the Creator.

Blog Tag - [p1] [p2] [p3]

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Wish Upon series

Stardust AU, canon setting. Wanderer tries to catch a fallen star to get a blessing from Celestia and obtain a heart. Instead, he gets you.

Blog tag - [p1]

Misc. fics

Not aligned to any specific AU or series!

[200 Follower Event tag]

[Creator!Reader and Cyno's bad jokes] [dollmaker!Reader and the scara gang]

🔞 [18+ tag] 🔞

[tsutsumi-kurose]

Do you think Nene will meet Tsukasa or Amane in the red house? What do you think will happen? Personally, I think it might not be a good idea. Nene is not well and seeing one of the twins in that state is… dangerous.

I definitely agree it would be dangerous for nene to encounter either of the twins in their current states, but I find it really interesting that you mention nene’s current mindset as a risk factor! while she’s clearly (and understandably) upset by the changes she’s seen, I think she’s been making really rational, mature, and thoughtful decisions this arc, even if they were a little misguided or didn’t consider the whole scope of possibilities, as teru pointed out.

in terms of danger and mindset, I feel like nene will be in the most danger if she tries to give this amane or tsukasa the benefit of the doubt, as she’s inclined to do, due to her typically optimistic and trusting mindset, as well as her history with the yugis. she may also run into a possessed kou or mitsuba and run into a similar problem. so I think it could be her trusting, kind nature that gets her into danger this arc. though she is definitely making decisions in a way that's based on what's best for the other people she cares about, so i agree that's definitely something that these new, more possessed versions of the yugis could use against her if they (or whoever is in control of them) wanted to.

but nene's optimism and faith in others has always been a double edged sword that has also helped her make progress before, so her giving and trusting nature could help her in this arc too!! maybe she’ll befriend more red house victims again, and be able to rally allies. in terms of her trusting nature, maybe she'll end up trusting the people mitsuba shied away from last chapter, and we could get to see what their intentions were before amane took mitsuba.

however, as of right now, nene is at least with other people who can help her, should she be swayed. I don't expect them to all stick together, but I'm assuming teru has some sort of plan? the idea that everyone is mostly going along with at the moment is teru’s, which raises a lot of questions for me! surely he’s prepared to encounter new timeline tsukasa again, and maybe even new timeline amane, but I have no clue if he’d want nene to see the yugis (maybe to extra convince her to go back? maybe to see if her presence affects the new timeline yugis at all? as bait or a distraction? so many possibilities!!) or if he’d want to keep them separate for any reason. so a lot of whether she sees the yugis probably depends on teru's plan and how prepared he is going into this. he seemed to know a lot about the red house in the original red house arc, but we haven't seen him interacting with it, so i'm really interested to see how much he knows about it and how his exorcist powers stack up against the red house's powers!

as far as the yugis are concerned, I have far more questions than theories lol, including: would either of them have reason to recognize nene? have they been having dreams of a different life too? what are their current goals, and how does their dedication to those goals stack against any feelings for nene that may be sticking around from the original timeline? personally, I have no clue! but I’m excited to find out!! scared for our girl, but also very excited. as an angst fiend, I think it could be really terrifying and exciting to see an amane who has no regard for nene or her safety. how new and interesting and horrifying if our hero turns against our heroine!!

honestly i would love to see nene interacting with this new amane, even if it goes poorly for both of them. i also love nene and tsukasa interactions, and he's been her amane info guide thus far in the story, and especially in the red house arc, so maybe we'll get more of that this arc? but again i'd really love to see nene and new timeline amane interact bc i think it would be really scary and devastating<3 so yeah definitely dangerous and not a good idea....but it would be really interesting to see lol

I’m honestly just so thrilled to be along for the ride this arc lol. especially since the red house is probably my favorite arc (is my tsukasa bias showing? lol) I’m so excited for all the lore we could get in this return to this setting!!

[coldasyou]

Hi! I'm a different anon but I've been kinda curious about your thoughts on this..since you've shared some of your struggles with depression. I've also been suicidal now and especially in the past but I don't feel like she talks about it genuinely in this album compared to past albums. Like there isn't one song about it..it's more like things that happened that made her "crazy" which relates to the asylum imagery. But to me it's all exaggerated I guess and idk how she could dismiss her partners feelings experience with it either. That makes me kinda uncomfortable. Of course songs like Antihero and I Can Do It are allowed to be cuz we have all been there but I don't get the sense she actually wanted to kill herself like she's talked about with some lyrics like about crashing into the rocks everyone is saying...compared to in This is Me Trying, Hoax or Evermore. Idk..we don't get a song here that describes how she actually felt or how bad the depression actually was.Maybe The Black Dog, I Can Do it and I Hate it Here show it the most..and the fame songs. Of course I think she struggles with it generally and definitely with fame. I also think it's a different kind than me,that I don't relate to so maybe it's just me and everyone is different. She also had someone falling in love with her at the worst time of her life lol which is not my experience at all and now that is happening again. So it's hard to believe it most of the time and part of why I have a hard time with this album I think and it's been hard to figure out why. Sorry this is so long..I hope it's okay I sent this.

you're totally fine, I think it's important to have these conversations.

it's just all kind of hard to talk about bc on one hand I don't want to assume things about taylor's mental state that I do not know, but I also want to listen to and discuss what she's portrayed and said in her art. like where does interpretation end and speculation begin? especially with a topic as sensitive as this, so I guess what I would say is I think taylor's made it clear she's struggled with her mental health and I think a lot of it has to do with fame. and like you said it's kinda hard for us to relate to that bc well, we're not famous, and it sometimes feels like "why would you complain about having all this money and success other people would kill for." idk I'm kinda rambling at this point, I wish I had a concise reply but I think at the end of the day I'd rather give taylor the benefit of the doubt that she is using this terms and portraying herself in this way bc it's how she genuinely feels. i'd rather be wrong than say someone can't talk about their own mental health in a way I don't like. we are in an era of people using stuff like intrusive thoughts as a joke so I get why everyone is a bit wary of stuff like this but that's personally how I feel.

[bisluthq]

This whole album has really made me think of this one interview Taylor did back in like 2011-2012 where she said something like "I'm usually very intelligent. Except when I'm in love" and good grief if that quote isn't this album summed up☠️😂 She really is very clever but yes she is irrational and reckless when she's overpowered by love, it's her Aquilles heel that makes her self-sabotage. I really genuinely did think it had been her who broke things of with Matty. I inevitably always give her the benefit of the doubt bc I've been a full on stan since 2008 so I really did think she was recklessly rebounding with someone who's been a long time friend and who she had a lot of love for but I was so sure that the reason it ended was because she snapped back into consciousness and realized that she was idealizing a manchild that watches degenerate racist misogynistic porn and that said a mean racist comment about her friend Ice Spice and oh also is a drug addict? So I thought she cut things off and realized she was out of her mind. Biggest plot twist ever bc turns out she did not and it was in fact Matty who left her stranded??? 💀💀💀 I have so many questions about how and why (I assume he could not deal with Swifties and everyone criticising the very criticizable things he does on main) but mostly I'm just glad bc this girl was straight up ready to marry and reproduce with him. I'm not in any way glad that she was hurt so viscerally yet again and in such short time, like I'm genuinely sorry and the album made me cry so much and I just wanted to give her a big hug. But oof I'm so relieved that she dodged that bullet though😅 stay safe

I don’t think we’re safe from Tatty 3.0 tho. There may be a Tatty kid yet.

[the-mighty-mittens]

You know what time it is

Omori spoiler time while I cry about the game yahoo

I'm in a spooky tree hole

This is about Mari isn't it

We're gonna find out what happened to Mari maybe

Hospital

Woops that person's dead

Long stairs again

Someone sitting at the bottom of the stairs?

Did. Did Mari fall down the stairs?

Is that blood on Sunny's face

The broken violin

They're at the top of the stairs together

He

he pushed her didn't he

Sunny killed Mari pushing her down the stairs (either accidentally or on purpose idk) and framed it as a su!c!de didn't he

Ok so:

He smashed his violin

Mari was upset bc they had the recital coming up

They got into a fight and Mari fell (I'm going to give Sunny the benefit of the doubt and say it was an accident)

We know she had a bad knee

She died or almost died and Sunny framed it as a sui

jesus christ dude

"Do you want to save Basil" YES I WANNA SAVE BASIL THAT POOR BOY

I'M SORRY BASIL 😭

He's giving Spinel vibes

Do I have to attack Basil ;-;

I'm not Sunny but I don't hate you Basil dw 😭😭

Basil I want to stop it but I literally don't have any other options I'm SORRY The heart monitor is saying "everything is going to be okay"

"Stressed out" Mood tbh

Whoops there goes an eye

YES GOOD KITTY MEWO IS A VERY GOOD GIRL 😭 (As you can see I am still traumatized from the Punishment room, even though I didn't hurt her)

hgfhdgfdshgj they shared a room they were really close huh 😭😭😭

OH THE TOY BOX

The broken violin?

It's. fixing itself?

Oh is this a pun on Memory Lane XD

IT IS XD

I MADE A COMMENT SAYING I UNDERSTAND THE JOKES ABOUT MARI AND THE STAIRS AND SOMEONE SAID "She fell down those stairs harder than she fell for Hero" I'M CRYING

Well, Aubrey did dye her hair pink

Sunny just wanted everyone to be happy hjdsjghjdfgh 😭😭

The recital venue?

Am I gonna unleash some kind of demon by playing this music or is it just gonna be sad

It's the opening theme again

is he ok

I gotta fight my inner self? He has a knife this is unfair

"Omori did not succumb" I never thought those words would be used against me

This poor boy has been through some stuff

Alright Omori death counter: 2

Wait I can't retry

Do i not have to beat him? is it impossible to beat him? Did I just have to get to the final phase?

HDFJGSHKJHGBDKJ GOSH DARNIT IT'S BACKSTORY THEY'RE SO CUTE

😭😭

Oh my god so this fight really did happen then. Is Basil okay ;-;

[thebibi]

op's tags from your "train was delayed for days" reblog kkfsdkfd "#this would be the…. perfect place for jack and quincey to fuck. just saying.#they hook up bc they are tired of hearing jonathan and mina through the walls going at it like the world is ending which it kind of is" but honestly imo it applies to helward more jack and quincey have their chance during their final ride because they all have written their wills down, so death has set in as a solid possibility in their heads, but now they are stranded there for days thinking about it with the specter of death and of what they've done at the cemetery haunting them while being with a half-vampire who can turn at any night now, and she's sharing a bed with a man, so potentially two vampires, and are they going to die with regrets and words and desires left unspoken…! Funny thing is that the same anticipation then happens later at the Varna hotel.

See, with helward there's so much angst potential, but they're also quite unsufferable together, what with their secret meetings and silent communications with each other. Like all it would take is one suggestion of "strenuous physical activity" as a treatment for stress and then the next thing you know Van Helsing is pulling Jack into the study to try this out (or vice versa...maybe Jack is the one who thinks an orgasm would calm Van Helsing down). And since they're oblivious to how lame their excuse sounds, everyone gives them benefit of the doubt.

Except Mina. Because she's gotten enhanced awareness from Dracula so she can tell what is up!! Like what if initially, Mina, already full of guilt and martyrdom, doesn't want Jonathan to be intimate with her. But then in the middle of the week or something Mina lies awake at night able to HEAR Van Helsing's dumbass excuse for inviting himself inside Jack's room, and the subsequent noises that follow. So she's like, you know what? Guilt temporarily on hold, I'm going to fuck my husband! And Jonathan was so much happier for it.

Anyway thank you for the ask it got me thinking a lot here... LoL

[notesofarichlycolorednight]

s2ep4 despair bear

you're not gonna believe this, another episode i absolutely despised

racism

chloe's character

nice v kind

implication that it's difficult to be kind

being kind to gain something

marinette being compared to chloe

chat noir

this list is more to remind me what i what to cover, but they're all interrelated.

the racism one is pretty standard whenever chloe features. like it's not overt racism like kung food, but it's unfortunate optics for the writing team to have this rich white girl keep targeting her working-class mixed classmate and her black friend bc marinette just happens to be the main character so things have to happen to her. say it with me folks, you can't make a character non-white and then not examine what the means within your wider text.

the thing that irritates me the most is that chloe's character is treated with far too much grace. like putting aside wanting her to become soup, it's very grating for people to always give her the benefit of the doubt, and think she can change, and then scold marinette for not trusting her when all chloe has done is harass her and be racist toward her. she gets a miraculous for this behavior!!

speaking of, the fact that this episode should be more about chloe actually learning a lesson about how her words and actions effect people, it became more about marinette/ladybug learning to,,,idk accept that chloe can do nice things sometimes? like i'm not going to use the word "change" bc chloe did none of that.

and i'm mad that they had a scene where chloe actually helps ladybug bc it would've actually been quite a powerful moment for chloe had the writers been better at their job. (this is usually where i would throw something out there as a demonstration about how easy it would've been, but considering that chloe has thus far been an incredibly mean and racist person, i don't want to give her character any more thought than necessary.)

like ladybug turning to chloe to help her stop despair bear just bc chloe helped once. and then chloe being arrogant and overconfident about it, and all ladybug has to say (or not say, as it were) is to smile?? as smile that clearly communicates, "well what can you do?"

not praise her! actually tell her that what she did was dangerous! call her out for her racism! again, i think anyone as racist and unwilling to learn as chloe is should be turned into soup. punch nazis!

anyway.

it just frustrates me that after chloe affirms that she and adrien are still friends, she immediately goes back to being a bitch. i commented on this when the episode first aired, and i'll say it again here: the fact that she didn't learn a single thing and all adrien has to say is, "some people can never change." is my joker origin story.

i also hate that they gives us glimpses of a tragic backstory in this. as if this is supposed to make me feel bed for her. cool story, still murder and all that.

which leads me into points 3, 4, and 5. i think it's wrong to teach children that they should be kind just to gain something. they should be kind bc you care about your fellow humans. that's like how fundi christians teach children--it's fear-based. "you go to hell if you don't do what i say." except what they say changes and often does not involve being kind to everyone. it also communicates that people should be kind under some kind of pressure, so if the pressure isn't there, what's the use in being kind?

and i generally like to distinguish nice and kind in conversations like these. it makes me think about that post that talks about the difference between like east coasters vs west coasters. now, i'm a west coast best coast girlie to my grave. but i will admit that, like the post points out, they're nice but not kind. while many on the east coast are kind, but not nice. and the difference there is important.

chloe can be nice. but she's never kind.

i also really hate the implication that it's difficult for some people to be kind. i think that the ways in which we can be kind are a skill that we learn over time. but being mean isn't not our default setting. i'm not entirely sure what i'm trying to say here, but it just bothered me that the narrative essentially teaches and supports the idea that it's in chloe's dna to be mean or something. she's just a spoiled rich white girl.

marinette is a mess in this one. once again, she's the one who's supposed to learn the lesson. not only that, but she's once again so caught up with adrien that her brain melts out the side of her ears, and the narrative is made worse for it. when's that "the power of love so strong" gonna kick in? i had so much more to say and articulated much better, but i'm tired. just know that marinette's arc in this episode was also bad. but are we surprised?

edit: i remembered what i wanted to say. and the heel-face-turn marinette does at the beginning of the episode, going from "chloe just accused me of wrong-doing because she hated that me and my dad were getting positive attention and she wasn't getting any attention at all, and i'm angry about the injustice of wrongly accusing me of something serious," to "omg omg omg adrien spoke to me and stood up for me" is sooooo annoying and just butchers marinette's character. again, it's not bad for her to have a crush on adrien, but in these writers' hands, it's not done well.

once again chat noir is brainwashed to fight against ladybug and his cataclysm is useless. i should start keeping a tally.

and once again, ladybug proves that she does not need him to win against an akuma, reaffirming they're not equal partners despite what the writers want us to think.

also i know we know gabriel is hawkmoth, but does he really have so much time, he just stands around in his dark butterfly lair, waiting for scenarios to play out that call for an akuma? sometimes they show him being busy with fashion, but seriously?? i know he's rich, but i've seen the craziness of fashion week shows. there's no way he has that much time.

not to mention hawkmoth seems to be near-omniscience if he can sense that chloe is throwing a party and prepare an akuma for it? like i didn't realize this before, but it's never explained how he knows. like is that just part of the butterfly miraculous? but like. why? further evidence that they designed the villain before the miraculous itself bc if it were being used by a good guy, why would they need to sense that?

the one thing i actually liked about the episode was how ladybug beat despair bear (ignoring chloe's part). i thought it was clever, which is something the writers are lacking in spades.

[cheemken]

So yeah, Villain Iris and Team Plasma

GOD I listen to the song you said felt like Iris and N. You are so true it IS them. N telling Iris that she’s making a mistake by siding with the enemy

But Iris is sick of all the hate she’s getting from the people of Unova who don’t believe she’s good enough. She just wants to prove everyone wrong by showing how strong she truly is, even though drastic ways. But lmao yeah she’s just doing what the people of Unova did to her, treating them the same way they treated her

Imagine she found the location of Ghetsis temporary hide out and she just, girlbosses her way inside. Taking down grunts until she reaches the room where Ghetsis is trying to make a run for it, thinking the Government or some organization found his ass. But he’s still being cautious cause the damn Champion of Unova is there with her Haxorus. He makes a snide comment about how there’s finally a champion that takes initiative, the public must be happy with her

But she just, calls her Pokémon back to his pokeball and sits in a chair across from Ghetsis. Getting straight to the point about why she’s there, saying she wants to make a deal with him

She will give him private information about the Unova League, will fight for him should the time ever come, AND she reminds him about how she is the Hero of Fate and she can control Kyurem and it’s power, all of that in exchange for the power and control that comes with Team Plasma

She wants to become an equal to Ghetsis, she wants to be a leader of Team Plasma. She’s confident that with her help Team Plasma will rule over Unova. She’ll make sure the same mistake doesn’t happen again

(They both know the other would backstab them if given the chance, but they’re willing to work together for the time being)

OUGHDKCBDBDNS RIGHT IT FITS THEM SO MUCH IM CJXNDBDN

God pls I'm so normal abt them (foams in the mouth)

This is gon be longer than the other ask bet bc I'm trash for the Unova peeps so I have more feelings abt this and abt them and just jcmdbfkd

OUGGHHHH IRIS USING THE HERO OF FATE THING JCMCNFMCNCMDBCMDBFNCNDNGGOING FUCKING INSANE OVER THAT OUGHFJBCMDDHMDBDMD

But also Iris just girlbossing her way to Ghetsis' office, what an icon😭🤣

Anyways omf but like hdmdbdj

Yknow while Ghetsis knows to not challenge the Champion, he wants her to know she's outnumbered still despite taking out the grunts guarding his office. So while talking to her he subtly taps his cane twice on the floor, calling forth the Shadow Triad. But it's been a minute, then a few more, he couldn't feel their presence, couldn't feel them within the room. He gritted his teeth, then he looked at Iris, she was smiling at him, shaking her head. She pulls out a black and bloodied bandana from her pocket, waving it around.

"you were looking for them weren't you?" She laughed at the way he tried to hide his surprise. She saw his grip on his cane getting tighter, and she drawled out, "they were weak. Then again, what did I expect from Plasma, anyways?" And she went on how it was just a pathetic organization, run by a pathetic man, and his equally pathetic sages and mercenaries. But, w her help, it won't have to be a sorry excuse for an organization anymore. Not like it was in the first place, she knew Plasma would be in a much better situation in her hands than on Ghetsis'. And god ofc, Ghetsis also wanted that power, and ofc he'd give her the benefit of a doubt of her being one of Plasma's leaders, especially since she has Kyurem too, and while he failed the first and second times, he's not gonna fail a third time. As they say, third time's the charm.

But then again, bad things come in threes.

The plan was going well. They first froze over Icirrus, as it was a frozen wasteland anyways, Dragonspiral Tower has been destroyed, not like it has any use for them anyways. Everyone was running, screaming for help, Brycen wasn't around as Gym Leader anymore, so the folks ran and got help from the strongest trainers in the city, hoping it would be enough to buy them time to call Brycen, or even better, their Champion. Iris merely watched them from the frigate, Ghetsis right besides her, he was monologuing really, she didn't listen, he was quite boring.

And when Icirrus was nothing more than a frozen graveyard, they left, just as Brycen finally arrived, what welcomed him were the frozen corpses of the people he once protected.

Next was Mistralton. Skyla had put up a fight, but unfortunately Flying types were weak to Ice. W her Braviary, they tried flying towards the frigate, a newfound rage in her eyes as the rest of her gym trainers were helping the people of Mistralton from the grunts. Just as she was close to getting to the frigate, a Hydreigon came in, stopping her. And ofc, she thought it was Ghetsis' Hydreigon, she knows he has one, so she and her Braviary tried attacking it. Just as she was about to win, a beam of ice hit her and Braviary, making them fall from the sky. Braviary was quick to recover, flying beneath Skyla just in time to save her from a gruesome death. And as the two looked up, the frigate went on the direction of Driftveil. Skyla looked around Mistralton, they couldn't save a lot of people and Pokémon, and god she felt like shit. She ended up calling Clay, warning him of Plasma, and after the call, she's there trying to help those who survived the brunt of Plasma's ice.

Ofc, it didn't surprise Iris in the slightest that Driftveil was prepared. And she knows by now that Clay also informed the rest of the League. Oh, what a hassle. But, as much as he put up a fight, Ground types were also weak to Ice. Iris just let Kyurem have his fun, she thinks he deserves it for all the hard work. She watches Clay along w his gym trainers and the trainers from the PWT try and stop Kyurem, but failing miserably. Kyurem howled and used Glaciate, Fire specialists and those w Fire types tried to counter it w Flamethrower and Heat Wave and Flare Blitz, crashing to the ice, hoping it'd melt, praying to Arceus it's enough. But it wasn't.

Watching them struggle, Iris actually laughed. Those people insulted her for being weak, but look who's the weak one now. Ghetsis wasn't around, but she knows what he was going to do. And man was it so predictable. She hears his footsteps behind her, no doubt to backstab her. Just as he was about to, he grunted, as he was suddenly held down to the ground. Iris finally turned to him, the Shadow Triad was pinning him to the deck, two were grabbing his arms, the other one has his hand the back of Ghetsis' neck, forcing him to look up to Iris. Ofc that caught him off guard. He thought they were dead.

Iris just laughed at him, then she looked at the mercenary in the middle, "you were right, he really fell for it," she said, pulling out the same bandana, throwing it in front of him.

Ghetsis struggled within their grasps, calling them traitors, but they said that Iris offered them a better deal, smth Ghetsis himself didn't offer them. The former boss of Plasma tried to fight back, to call out his own Pokémon, but none came out of their pokeball, refusing to do his bidding. Ghetsis looked up at Iris, a puff of smoke leaving her lips as she laughed, the cold was really getting to all of them. Her eyes were bright, almost glowing, she looked as if bored. Then w a smile, she said, "kill him."

And for once in his life, Ghetsis finally knew what fear felt like

[whoseafraidofliloleme]

I CAUGHT UP!!!!

first off, as always, LOVING the sibling dynamic!!! each of them have their own colour and i love seeing them interact <3 and how they baby our dear yn too of course

moving on to the matter at hand, the guy on everyone's minds (derogative): hyunjin. i... rlly don't know how to feel abt him??? like he clearly has red flags but i feel like he might pull through in the end and stop being so toxic. i wonder if there's actually smth behind his behavior, or if it's just plain jealousy. tbh i think i'm just too much like our dear yn and i'm giving him the benefit of the doubt, but i don't wanna jump completely on the hate train. rn i'm waiting at the station and i might get in when it comes 😚

then the man on everyone's minds (affectionate): jungwonnie!!!! nothing to say besides that i love him <3 it's so refreshing seeing him be so kind and understanding and having proper communication from the beginning, we love to see it! and the park siblings already love him, as they should

i gotta hurry bc i'm gonna go eat so. question time!!! is this smau gonna be around the same lengths your other smaus are? are you planning on expanding more on yn's backstory? (please say yes) AND MORE IMPORTANTLY: why buttercup? is it because she's tough and never doubts, unlike yn???? or just bc she liked her colors the best??????? why did yn want to grow up to be her?????????

have a nice day and i hope something good happens to you tomorrow! you're gonna find a pc on pristine condition lying on the ground i just know it!!

By saying you loved it, I'll add you to the tag list 😊. Now you won't miss an update and I get a lovely reblog with your reaction in the tags, which I love btw they crack me up every time. Moving on...

I'm just happy that people love the sibling dynamic, writing siblings is always tricky cause I don't have any so it's not from experience just what I've seen and read but I'm glad that all the Park Siblings seem like distinct characters.

If there are siblings that play a major role, 100% YN is gonna be the maknae 😂. Then again I might just challenge myself to make one of my YNs be the eldest or the middle child...

Hmm I dunno where his story line will take us atm. There's definitely a backstory there and it's coming in future chapters but at this point in time it's up in the air if Hyunjin will be recieving a redemption arc or not 😂.

Ngl this might be my favourite Jungwon cause he's just such a sweetheart and he's been like that since the beginning 🥹🥹🥹. I just love him so much and I'm so happy that everyone loves him too, TSIT Jungwon deserves all the love.

I hate short smaus, so this one will probably be 30 chaps, maybe longer if I feel like I can add more drama and angst 😂. Or even fluff, really it depends on my mood.

YNs backstory, I'm not sure if it'll be explained more in future chapters or not but so you know I'll outline it here:

Parknae was kidnapped as a baby by a couple who had just gone through a miscarriage. They saw a young baby unattended by nurses and kidnapped her from the hospital.

Parknae being kidnapped was big news and they saw on the news but seeing that the Parks were rich and there were already 5 older siblings they ran away with Parknae thinking the Parks will get over it eventually.

They did care and love her for the first decade of her life, they treated her as their own child. Unfortunately the Park family never recovered from losing a child.

Their parents went through depression, blamed themselves for losing their youngest child and did everything they could to find her again. The remaining Park siblings, felt the pain of a lost little sister and did all the could to help find their youngest sister.

Despite the loss of Parknae. The parents didn't forget that they had 5 other children, they still loved and cared for them as they did before but there was always something missing. The whole family felt that missing piece.

Sadly a year before Parknae was reunited with her family, the parents were in a car accident and they died, coincidentally they were on their way to see a Private Investigator who they had hired to find Parknae...

Subsequently Parknae never got to actually meet her biological parents, she only knows them through pictures, videos and stories.

I hope that answers the questions on Parknaes backstory.

Buttercup because she's what YN strives to be and also YN just loves that Jungwon took this random bit of info and made it into a nickname for her.

This turned out to be a hella long ask 😂. Go eat something and I hope you have a good day too!!. I do still recommend you read Peace a Jay Harry Potter meets Gossip Girl smau, but that's just me wanting to see you reaction to that smau 😂.

Have a good day! Stay hydrated and happy!!.

[ardorsung]

A FUTURE WITHOUT YOU I DON'T WANT TO IMAGINE.........

I WAKE UP EACH MORNING, SEARCHING FOR YOU / BUT YOU'RE NOT HERE ANYMORE, SO I NO LONGER KNOW WHAT'S RIGHT!!!!!!!!

i think in any instance where shinobu and blade are separated for any period of time, it's absolutely AWFUL for her. i keep ruminating over the idea of, much like thancred, her being the first to get pulled into the First by the crystal exarch; and i think it hurts in that, at the end of stormblood, there's a lot she still doesn't quite know how to handle. to come to terms with. and so shadowbringers is the arc where she 'grows up', so to speak, not to say she isn't grown up but following the end of stormblood - throughout shadowbringers and into endwalker, she hardens up a bit; she loses her softness for a short while. for better or for worse, bc in doing so, there's an emotional wall built that she hadn't necessarily had previous --- she's quicker to fall back, to hide the enormity of her emotions, because she doesn't want to fall back on being a burden once more. she doesn't cry anymore, or not so easily anyways, but at what cost.

is it right to give those the benefit of the doubt or are you being a bother, feeding into the enemy with your naivete? is war the only way to go, where words and understanding fail, is understanding or trying to understand a fault in and of itself!!!!!!!

this song & this song are very much the mood and im sooooooooo sad kupo

i also think, depending on what i do? bc this'll be determined as i'm going through the story again & refreshing myself on it, that although the end of stormblood - through shadowbringers where she loses her softness just a tad, some time during endwalker would be her arc of recognition; reconnecting & coming to terms with who she is, that her softness isn't a curse nor is feeling. bc i think everyone has had those arcs in their lives, where they've grown bitter & realized like... no i hate this. i hate being closed off, jaded with it all, i want to try again; i want to blossom again, i want kindness to envelop every part of my being bc if i lose my warmth in a world enveloped by startling coldness where kindness is little who! then! will be kind! to spread kindness, to breathe gentleness, to grow in the harshest of climates!