#i'm also just not going for men anymore | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

saintofterror · 1 month ago

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i'm currently the single friend and i have no desire to quote-unquote "fix it" (it's not an issue to be fixed but i've always been anxious abt it) for the first time in my life but it's also making me realize that only two of my friends who are also dating haven't made me feel excluded or like im intruding when we all hang out?? and it's very interesting.

#i'm also just not going for men anymore #there was a guy who hit on me and gave me his number on friday and i want so bad to just say i'm gay so he leaves me alone but i feel so ba #being the single friend is actually kind of fun #it's forcing me to figure out what i wanna do bc i know all my friends already have other people they kinda wanna hang out with more #so i don't feel anxious abt making the quote-unquote right choice when we hang #i also don't really like drinking turns out #personal

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rainbow-demon503 · 2 months ago

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my process thusly

witness the ghost craze after the game comes out and recognise that masked men are hot.

what the hell, I'll check out his r34 tag

huh this is some nice art

huh he gets shipped mainly with soap it seems? I like the dynamic I'm seeing

Oh wow this one comic is actually kinda sad and not really that pornographic at all

oh wow there's a few of these that are actually really touching

ok what the hell I'll check it out on Tumblr (at this point I haven't even looked at the game on steam. and probably never will buy or play it)

wait hold on soap DIES???

oh no I'm invested in the tragedy of it all now

#ghost x soap #call of duty #modern warefare ii #cod mw2 #cod mwii #simon ghost riley #johnny soap mactavish #funny thing about their tags on r34 #is that regardless of who of the mw2 boys- be it ghost soap könig or someone else #people will go ballistic if they're trans in the art #normal entries have like 0-5 comments depending on comic/single pic etc.#but put a pussy on these men? the crowd cheers #the crowd celebrates the ghussy #those entries have 5+ comments #also also #one of the tragedies of r34 is that it's usually pretty good at just giving you the name of the artist and even their Twitter #but sometimes there's no artist attributed even when they're requested #which is already sad but then. I see when the art was uploaded and it says smth like 2011 #and I'm like. what #that's tragic #bc its the internet so that artist probably has a new handle or isn't active anymore or similar #and if nobody bothered to tag their name in the first place .... the chances are low of finding their new handle

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catkin-morgs-kookaburralover · 7 months ago

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questioning sexuality is so exhausting

#(edit: sorry for the rant in the tags and i just. i want someone to talk to me)#i keep on doing it for no apparent reason #someone was talking about lust yesterday and i realised today that.#even tho id thought i don't experience it. i possibly do. but exclusively towards women.#i hate it here!#for a multitude of reasons i will never have a relationship with a woman but! i may be incapable of having a relationship with a man!#at some point in the last few months i have abruptly pivoted from definitely wanting marriage and kids to being ambivalent on marriage #and not wanting kids. that's such an outlier in my life that it might just be a mental health thing tho idk #but at the same time i. want to be loved.#i don't know what i want anymore and im tired of questioning myself #i definitely overthink it but idk how to stop it #and i hate hate hate how the moral obsessions have bee lately #this isn't entirely related but it kind of is #like Am i a terrible morally bankrupt person for having certain thoughts or is it just religious ocd go brrrr?? am i overthinking it?#i don't know. i don't know!#for a while labelling myself as arospec ace kinda calmed that down but. i don't know #i do't want to be attracted to women. i don't want to have to look away so often. i don't want any of that.#but i don't know how to stop it.#i don't even know if i'm attracted to men at all.#this is a cry for help and encouragement and prayers no matter what your views on these matters are #queer stuff tag #i nearly fessed up to my friend yesterday about same sex attraction and i might've except that it would have probably outed me as #the person who anonymously sent in a question several months ago about the side b movement to a church thing #ive only told one person at church about any of that sort of stuff and it was very vaguely worded #also see: this friend is the mother of the boy i?? i don't even know how i feel about him #i increasingly think it wasn't romantic at all. but i don't know #i would love any encouragement you got. anything at all.#i don't know how much this stuff is affected by the fact that i consider myself unloveable and think it highly unlikely any boy will ever #care for me #now im rambling. sorry

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bayrut · 6 months ago

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I may have made a mistake.....

#highest grossing post of all time what's going on hello.....#anyway squish h and rory's sibling we're all intellectuals and I'm holding all of your hands in a cute circle #rory hanan hadiya evie em mara hayden mae and v get well soon pls 🙏 can't relate #i just do pants with 10000 pockets and carry minimum stuff like phone and tiny wallet (like i have one of those tiny men wallets)#it fits 8 cards at most and 1 mini sewing kit #i don't even carry keys anymore unless I'm driving #and in the winter my jacket has enough pockets for hand cream chapstick etc etc #my mom hateeeees me for it but to be fair my mom hates me for a lot fo reasons; most of them being I'm not feminine enough #the only reason id be carrying a bag is if i need to carry my laptop or if im going to buy stuff (folded tote bag in pocket)#also pls pls if anyone else rbgd and i didn't see i am so sorry i love you and you are my friend and bestie even 🙏#but i cant see anything anymore in the notes there's too much its overwhelming #i just wanted to know what my mutuals did welppp not all of human population rip

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dead-salmon · 10 days ago

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twitter users don't act like awful human beings challenge 2k24

#''cry'' fucking #look i dont give a fuvk aboit the all-men thing #but you can't pit out a statement that only men rape children #and then your only response to people pointing out they know of wonen who raped children #is ''cry''#how fucking vile do you have to be seriously #also full iffense there's nothing wrong in pointing out there's female child rapists too #because guess what happens when you go ''only men''? guess what?#yes!! you got it!! victims of female rapists will feel even more scared to speak out!#literally i dont even fucking care anymore if you don't even have the decency to at least ignore those eeplies you shouldn't ever talk agai #i hate humans i hate humans i hate humans #YOUR RESPONSE TO CSA VICTIMS OF FEMALE RAPISTS BEING CRY #JUST SAY YOU DONT ACTUALLY CARE #i'm 75% sure that person's a terf just going by that behaviour #not-so-dead-salmon #tw rape mention #tw csa mention

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iceeericeee · 1 year ago

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I wonder how many tags i can add on to this

#there must be SOME kind of a limit otherwise posts would get suuuuuuper duper long like is it just 30?#idk but i'm going to find out by simply maxxing out the character limit for each tag and finding out the limit of tags for each post lololo #this is gonna be great. i just have to remember to type without ever using the comma. it shouldn't be too hard right? fuck i almost typed #the comma i'm already bad at this smh my head. also if your still here i commend you. you have a better attention span than i do.#i'm already starting to get bored holy shit this is not happening. i gotta power through this. FOR SCIENCEEEEEEEEEE. or somethinggggggggggg #but fr idk what else to say. maybe just saying that i don't know what to say will be good enough? but does that even count?#I don't even know anymore. ffffffffuck. this is gonna be a while huh? also holy shit if you're still here omg u deserve like. a prize or #something because u definitely didn't have to stay and read all of this bull shit. lololol i typed out bs but decided to just spell the who #thing out just to make it go by faster. i'm so lazy. this is only the nineth tag HOW will i make it to 30. i am sobbing the adhd is adhding #very hard rn. are you still here? bruh this is insane. i have somehow managed to keep ur attention this long and it's just me spouting #absolute balderdash. wait do you know what balderdash even means? i don't care if you do already i'm gonna tell you anyway. balderdash is #basically just another word for nonsense. boom. you learned something new today. balderdash equals nonsense equals this damn post.#why did i decide to do this in the first place. it was a dumb idea. i don't know if i can even keep going. this is only the *counts tags*#it's the 14th tag. we've got a long way to go boys. men. soldiers. comrads. friends. besties peeps. marshmallows.#where was i going with this? oh yeah. trying to max out the limit for tags. dang i almost typed a comma there. i haven't done that since #i think the third or fourth tag. dang that feels like such a long time ago. not for you guys probably. it feels longer because i have to li #type it all out and stuff. so it's definitely gonna feel longer for me. are you still here? good lord don't you have better things to #be doing than reading all of this? we're already on tag number 18. it feels like i should be on the thirtyeth by now. or however it's spell #'toast' you might be wondering 'why are you typing out the names of the numbers instead of say '9' or '5'?' well you see. young one.#this is a strategy i'm using to make each tag slightly longer. even if i don't know how to spell it. it'll make it just a little bit longer #anyway. i got off topic. not that there was ever a topic to begin with. unless it's about making this as long as i can.#which i am apparently good at doing. i guess. are you STILL here? do you seriously have nothing to do? i guess i'm flattered you stayed thi #whole time. instead of reading something else you stayed here. with me. listening to me talk. on the twenty-third tag. oh yeah its tag 23 #except now it's tag twenty-four. how crazy is that. this little talk is almost over. only 6 tags away if memory serves right. this's strang #i kind of don't want this to end. but i know it should. after all there is a limit. but all things must come to and end at some point i gue #i'm running out of things to say. it's probably a good thing it's almost over. hahahahah............... but i don't want to go. i don't wan #to leave this post. i've worked so hard on it. and for what. just for it to end. are you still here? yes? good. i'd hate to end this alone.#thank you for indulging me and my craziness. the end is only 2 tags away now. you can go ahead and leave. i'll be okay on my own. really...#...you're still here? i- i don't know what to say. i suppose a toast is in order. perhaps. for this journey. this stupid dumb post i though #would be fun. i'll make it short. it's the last tag after all. this was fun. but i will never do it again. so long as a i live. i'll miss y

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nobodybetterlookatme · 1 month ago

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aren't you a lesbian?

I did identify as a lesbian for a long ass time, yeah, but now my sexuality/romantic orientation is just kinda ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ tbh lmao

#not snz #i just say I'm queer now #easier #bc i don't fucking know ahdkkalsls #i have a lot of man trauma and didn't know any good men for the longest time #but now the majority of my coworkers are men and i love them and trust them with my life #so the thought of dating a man doesn't make me wanna curl up in a ball and die anymore lmao #i still like women for sure but i find myself going 👀 at guys a lot more now than i used to #but like I've said before idk how i even feel about dating in general #idk i just try not to think about it lmaoooooo #also it's been a hot minute since I've taken lesbian out of the bio #but i guess this is me formally coming out as confused ahdkaksk #flirt with me to see if you can swing me one way or another lmaooooooooo

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musical-chick-13 · 1 year ago

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"This show is SO good, you should watch it!!"

I gotta be honest. If I look at a character list on Wikipedia and get five characters down without seeing a single woman, it's probably not for me.

#I have no patience for 'there is exactly one woman in the main/supporting cast' anymore #unless the writing is INCREDIBLE and the themes are explored with a type of depth and nuance I can't get anywhere else (like shiki)#(daily media plug for shiki)#then I just. probably will not vibe with it. if there are no women. (also shiki DOES have interesting female characters in it)#and this isn't to say that like. things involving men or talking about men or that have a male protagonist are Not Worth #My Time that is NOT what I'm saying at all. I just want like. several women. who show up and affect the story. like LITERALLY that is all I #am asking for. I feel like that's just. the bare minimum. but alas.#mel screams about fictional ladies again #there are plenty of things that are male-character-focused that I enjoy and even genuinely think are good! but I do want people to #ask themselves why they aren't willing to go to bat for media that DOES have more women in the cast than men.#(I mean. the answer is misogyny. but I want people to be. aware of that. and evaluate accordingly)#(evaluate meaning 'acknowledge I have some biases I need to continue deconstructing' not 'drop interest in everything tumblr #user musical-chick-13 personally doesn't like')#I feel like so many times we get trapped in this space between overcorrection via 'don't like ANYTHING that's pRoBLeMaTiC in ANY way'#and people taking the 'it's fiction it's not that deep' to the conclusion of 'because I cannot actually hurt fictional characters because #they're not real that means I am incapable of hurting irl people when they talk about those characters'#like there is. nuance here. there is a middle ground. and most people have NO interest in finding it lmao #and like...if you carry your biases from irl (which EVERYONE HAS. INCLUDING ME. COURTESY OF LIVING IN A PREJUDICED SOCIETY.) into a #direct and one-to-one evaluation of stories or characters that allow you to exercise those biased ideas. then that reinforces those biases #like. no hating...for example every anime lady isn't the same as structural misogyny like the pay gap or anti-women violence #but if you automatically associate the idea of 'female character' with 'lesser-than' it strengthens the already-present societal idea that #women are not as important or dynamic or worthy of support and attention as their male peers. if you are willing to see every (white)#fictional man as having interiority and depth but struggle to see that in any fictional woman then it adds to the things society is already #telling us about women. it creates an association of 'women' with 'inferiority' and uh. that's what misogyny is.#it is not the same as misogynistic crimes against irl women but it IS a reflection of the rhetoric and societal impulses that lead to them #and even if it's a reflection and not the actual thing. it's still important to break down and examine and reevaluate because #if we don't examine our OWN biases. then even if we tear down the greater oppressive structure we'll just end up building it back up again #no your thousands of words of m/m fanfiction or liking late 2000s shonen anime isn't responsible for misogyny nor are these things #inherently misogynistic. I just want like. some acknowledgement that something being 'for fun' doesn't automatically mean that bias/#prejudice is nowhere to be found

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mad-hunts · 4 months ago

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19. entry made talking about a simple / normal day.

'dear diary' prompts...

[TRANSCRIPTION: so, i'd like to start this off by saying that i sometimes crave a sense of normalcy more than ever in my life... though i know that people might not expect something like that out of me. you know, because i seem so devoted to my work, i guess. but i have to say that after getting a taste of it today, it's probably when i'm at my happiest. me and jack had spent the day together, which is something we actually rarely get to do. he had told me about this crepe place that had opened up a little while ago and he seemed really eager to go there. so i invited jack to do that this morning and i swear, i hadn't seen him smile that big in a while. which did something funny to my heart.

and by that, i mean you know that feeling you get when you can't contain the love you have for someone? yeah that was pretty much what ended up happening to me; a fuzziness had hit me in the chest. but after we went there, and jack ate an impressive amount of crepes (he was really fond of the nutella and strawberry ones), my son suggested that we see this new movie that came out recently. and it was hard to pass up so of course i said yes. we snuck in some candy and drinks because, honestly, who wants to pay for the overpriced candy they have? not us so we did that and just like i expected... the theater was pretty packed since it was for the new hunger games movie. it was good though!

anyhow, after that, jack wanted to spend some time just hanging out by the water when he did something that surprised me. jack hugged me. and it was really nice, because i can't remember the last time my son gave me one like that. he went on to tell me that he missed 'this part of me.' this got me to thinking that, yeah, i have been treating him not so well for a while. so maybe i ought to change that. jack deserves to have a father who doesn't switch up on him every day, from being mean to being nice.

maybe i'll call my therapist back and tell her i want to start seeing her again. she might've said some things that i didn't like the last time, one of those being that i exhibit behaviors that are typical of sociopaths — but i guess i can make an exception for jack, because he's my little bug.

signed, barton. ]

#OF MONSTERS AND MEN: musings.#YOUR NEED GREW TEETH: character study.#tw: allusions to mistreatment of children.#sighs... y'all already know what i'm going to say here: barton's relationship with his kids really is complicated because he seems-#to love them in his own 'barton-like' way and this could mean various things from calling them things like 'his little bug' to being-#emotionally manipulative to them and it's like 😬 i just. the fact that barton could acknowledge here that he has treated him TERRIBLY-#in the past does imply that he does hold some sort of self-awareness about how he is severely lacking in the parent department-#but it's not enough for him to make any real changes unfortunately because barton is STILL like this to this day.#with him being super temperamental and hard to predict which is typical of emotionally manipulative / abusive people.#and although he is is pretty much a big ball of anger + unresolved trauma that has helped twist him into the man he is today-#AND it is also a fact that barton has experienced psychotic depression... that doesn't mean that he can blame his past for becoming-#a bad person. i just want to talk about the comment he made here about feeling a 'fuzziness in his chest' though because that is just.#it makes me want to WEEP alright because it makes it clear that barton does have the capacity to love his children in an actually-#healthy and understandable way but he doesn't most of the time and it's like... WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS GAHHH #tw: emotional manipulation.#tw: emotional abuse.#plus i honestly think that barton DID call his therapist at the time back and started to go back to her buttt being told by a mental health #professional that they noticed he lacks empathy is impulsive and seems to take enjoyment out of disrespecting people + breaking laws-#changed his relationship with them. so things were likely never the same again and barton didn't trust her anymore

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airbenderedacted · 2 years ago

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deathstar shippers stop going out of ur way to tell me you hate dominator being a lesbian and that you’re homophobic asf challenge (impossible, apparently)

#(cw: put under a read more for homophobia & transphobia 😬)#LITERALLY went ''lemme say the quiet part out loud'' BRO THIS IS LIKE THE 6TH(????) TIME I'VE HAD SUCH AN ENCOUNTER #except i will say that this is the first time it wasn't unprovoked. i did @ them first to ask why they were leaving replies on my posts-#-saying hater's crush on dominator is creepy bc they 'look like they have an age gap' meanwhile they've liked AND MADE #-comments elsewhere shipping her with men that are way WAY older than her and sometimes visibly so like. hater and her are the same agegroup #so i was like. what is going on here huh??? ANFD THEN THEY JUST SAY THIS SHIT why am i ever surprised anymore lmao #shout out to this person for adding transphobia to their shittiness for Spice ig /s 🙄 eugh...#i should've seen it coming bc they were referencing a page on the woy wiki THAT USES STEVENSON'S CORRECT NAME & PRONOUNDS #AND YET THEY WERE ADAMANT ON USING HIS DEADNAME AND SHE/HER PRONOUNS LIKE.. I SHOULD'VE EXPECTED THIS I SHOULD'VE EXPECTED THIS but still 🤢#i dont ever wanna stop giving ppl the benefit of the doubt but oh my god do These people test me. every time. goes like this Every Single T-#on god only like twice or smthn have i seen [REDACTED] shippers be like.. very decent to me and literally just ignorant #and they were from here and i just ask them to not interact bc it makes me uncomfortable and they're like i dont get it but ofc #and i never see them again #AND THEN EVERY OTHER PERSON WHO IS INTO THIS SHIT I HAVE *EVER* COME ACROSS #FUCKING JUST... JUMPS INTO MY MENTIONS OUT OF NOWHERE. LITERALLY I DONT EVEN?? DO ANYTHING I DONT GO NEAR THEM BRO #THEY FUCKING SNIFF ME OUT OR SOME SHIT FOR HAVING A DNI ON OTHER SITES AND GO #''OH SO YOU THINK I'M WRONG FOR HAVING TO REIMAGINE GAY/LESBIAN CHARACTERS AS STRAIGHT SO I CAN ENJOY THEM?'' LIKE- WTF? YES? IT IS #also i kid you not this is an actual thing someone has gone out of their way to look me up and yell at me over for like an hour straiught #on twitter. it was unhinged. like they were convinced straight ppl are oppressed any time gay characters exist #bc gay characters existing makes them unlikable and unrelatable and unconsumable to straights like damn ok if u feel that way die abt it?#it's just so unhinged like bruh GO AWAY LMAO??? SHUT UP! I DONT CARE LITERALLY JUST KEEP UR FREAK BIGOT SHIT TO URSELF GET OUT #again that specifically doesn't apply to this person who technically WAS @ by me first bc i was like.. hey... hey what's going on here HUH #but oh my god they turn out to be vocally homophobic every single time. i was always hoping i was like...#over generalizing these people as being fucking homophobic just bc 1) the vibes r always like that 2) it's faster to say #BUT OH MY GOD THEY REALLY ARE HOMOPHOBIC AS A WHOLE WHAT THE FUCK I LITERALLY ALWAYS WENT OUT OF THE WAY TO BE LIKE aint no way ahah BUT NO?#BRO???? GET OUT OF HERE THIS SHOW IS NOT FOR YOU Y'ALL ARE CREEPS #THEY FEEL SO EMBOLDED TO SAY THE QUIET PART OUT LOUD EVERY SINGLE TIME WITHOUT PROMPTING. I ALWAYS MAKE FUCKING SURE TO NOT ACCUSE BIGOTRY #AT MOST I'LL JUST BE LIKE yeah so straightwashing is a thing that's homophobic so don't do that IF ANYTHING. I NEVER CALL THE PERSON THAT #AND EVERY TIMEEEE THEY JUST GO MASK OFF WITH ''BTW I DONT LIKE THE GAYS'' I OEIUFKGEJRHGUKJDFS EVERY TIME EVERY TIME WTFFFFF #usually being right about things is epic. not this THIS IS JUST.. GWORLS WHAT HE FUCK

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keitheaverage · 1 year ago

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Puzzled by the concept of cis lesbians and feminists who are active TERFs/transphobes. First, you're tellin' me y'all DON'T get excited that there are more women in the world to adore and admire just bc they don't check your weird, arbitrary little boxes on what makes a woman, a woman? Also speaking of, I thought y'all were all about not wanting your womanhood being defined by your body parts or what your body can/can't do; but you're going to be mean and exclude a whole group of women for the same reasons???

I can only speak so much on this topic being a queer cis woman myself, but it couldn't be me, that's for sure.

#random thoughts with kei the average #also P.S.: can y'all back off of trans men who once id'ed as cis lesbians??#they did not ''betray'' you/women just bc you can't be attracted to them anymore. get tf over yourself if that's your beef.#I don't go on rants like this v often but idk it's been on my mind for a hot minute.#and bc it's pride month I've decided I'm choosing violence #also anyone caught clowning in the notes is getting instablocked. just saying that now.

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spacestationstorybook · 3 months ago

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diversity Loss one of my favorite‏‏‎ ‎mlp‏‏‎ ‎artists in the whole fandom keeps drawing a ship from a different fandom that i fucking HATEEEEEEEEE

#this is worse than the‏‏‎ ‎fe3h‏‏‎ ‎artist who draws a bunch of‏‏‎ ‎yuridetta‏‏‎ ‎#because comparatively‏‏‎ ‎yuridetta‏‏‎ ‎is just like. cringe. i don't hate it THIS viscerally #but this is also a ship involving one of my f/os and someone who treats her HORRIBLY.#and it's a fucking MAN. if i ever see a woman get shipped with a man who is horribly cruel to her again i might just lose it completely.#you're not fucking allowed to do it anymore. i'm confiscating your men and if you keep acting like this they're going in the garbage.#they don't even know i'd treat her soooooo much better we're not even on the same planet.#nyx on comms

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onlyglass · 9 months ago

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i will admit it's killing my s*lfsh1pper brain a little bit bc i feel like i can't say random ass things anymore like WHEN i'm excited but also the fear of appearing to get something Wrong does eat at me so very greatly.... anyway after i heard marie say it i actually like that his first name is literally just Franken. it's funny and cute.

#clyde.txt #plus i keep toeing the line with increasingly creepy men that don't actually go far enough to be genuinely uncomfortable or irredeemable #and i am soooooo afraid of that community rn.... but who gives a F i'm also trying to be bolder about it. the real ones get it. and yes #i may indeed be Getting Worse. but stein isn't even that bad it's just the author is fucking insane and so gross and i hate him #i'm just noided and i can't even vent on that blog anymore either lest. oh you know #i'm like atp should i literally just make a new one. But I Don't Want To

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wastemanjohn · 10 months ago

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will i ever be decided on the question of "do i want to start dating again"

#i know i don't want to date men anymore definitely just women or nb ppl #and i don't know if i want anything serious but i also don't want anything casual either #which isn't even a thing #lmao #or maybe I'm just uncomfortable bc ive never been single/uninvolved this long since my teens #which has actually been really good for me and my Personal Growth and shit #but idk I think I just miss the process of dating?#like hanging out and going places and getting to know someone #feeling giddy over someone #idk #if it happens it happens I guess #my bestie keeps trying to set me up with her cousin lol #and she's very sweet but it would be awkward af if it went wrong!

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heroes-fading · 2 years ago

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i have not cooked dinner in a solid few weeks and i feel bad about it as a partner but as a feminist yeah my husband cooks in our house damn straight i’m useless in the kitchen

#to the women in my life..........who have male partners.......who cannot cook........FRIENDS #i cannot relate babes #there's an attempt among the WIVES of some of my husband's friends to do like a girls night thing #and listen #i'm a girls girl through and through #but it devolves into omg my husband cannot even go to the grocery store right haha #don't you hate it when your husband is incompetent haha men ammiright #i don't go to those anymore because otherwise i will just tell them to dump their husbands #why are you with someone who you don't respect and who doesn't respect you heterosexuality rlly is a prison y'all #WE GOTTA DO ~SPORTS~ FOR THE ~boys~#oh mgy do #my husband is not a sports person I THANK GOD EVERY DAY #it's just board games and video games and you know what i hole up and write fanfic and he plays games with his friends #also i did not change my last name #because 2nd wave feminism did not die for that #and the amount of shit i get with his last name..............#from these women..........#WHAT YEAR IS IT I THOUGHT WE WERE HAIVNG A GOOD TIME HERE #i'm having a good time personally #anyway #VENT OVER #tbh i immediately schedule wine with a friend when those girls nights happen or it's pizza night and sorry babes husband does homemade doug #h #i'm gonna cause divorces i know i am #at some point #stop having kids with him you already got a child babes

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paterklatter · 11 months ago

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who up experiencing double internalized homophobia

#'i can't like girls that's unnatural and disgusting'#'i can't ever be a real man if i like men'#CAN I EVER WIN?????????#also i get like physically ill at the idea of marrying a man? not even dating that's fine. just forever tying myself to a man fucks me up #i feel like if i marry a man best case scenario i'm always going to be a faggot worst case scenario i'll be a wife until death #when i daydream about relationships i'm always married to the women and only dating the men #god i wish i were just a straight trans man then i could just be a regular ass man who was born in the wrong body #i transition and i get a job at the office bs factory and marry a woman and adopt 2.5 kids. i know i still wouldn't be normal but i wish #i always imagine i'll be in a happy regular marriage and any past relationships with men was just me 'experimenting'#i know that's bs. i know i like men just as much as women but i wish that it's going to change. i know it won't. but i wish #idk why i think about this so much i literally play overwatch and collect criterions i can't get dick or pussy to save my life #i had an interaction with my mom most akin to the 'damn nobody want you fr fr' meme the other day #i get so few bitches my mom can't even be homophobic anymore she just needs me to fuck already because i'm an embarrassment #peter.txt

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