#i'll have to join more discord servers which I'm not happy about

[shadowphoenixrider]

Man, I’m gonna be so mad, as Twitter was a goldmine for discovering new artists and hearing some interesting opinions on Star Wars (even if they were cringelords being stupid). There was some really nice artwork there.

Oh well, guess I’ll have to ply these waters again.

Who knows, I might actually become productive again.

[missingn000]

happy halloween, everyone! big news: The Phantom Guardian's hiatus is officially over!

exactly one year after the release of the last tpg chapter, sukuna's backstory: tears of the emperor, i'm thrilled to announce that my break from the story has come to a close. i'm now officially preparing to write the next chapter and return to tpg releases on a regular basis! i've dearly missed this story and this community, and i'm so excited to be back. 

to prepare for writing this story again, i'll be doing a tpg live-react reread in the tpg discord server! come laugh at me as you watch me suffer through the suffering i put all of you through. we can chat about the story, the characters, and reminisce about what a crazy ride it's been and where we could be going from here. come join the fun!! this will also be a great way to remind yourselves of everything that's happened without having to read through all 637,000 words of this monstrosity. join the discord here!

as for when the next chapter will officially come out: i gotta get through the tpg reread first, which might take a bit, but i hope to have ch49 out sometime before the end of the year, if not very early january. i'll be hosting even more fun events and activities to bring us all back together as the next release grows nearer! i don't use bluesky or twitter, but feel free to share this news wherever. i'd love as many people as possible to join the fun!!

i love you all so much, and i can't thank you enough for your patience with me this past year. i hope you're as excited to dive back into this fic as i am!

happy halloween, everyone. we're so fucking back.

[iheartcabbyiii]

I didn't want to make this post, and I still don't, but I don't think I can keep my silence on the situation for any longer. I've only told a few people about this, so I'm here now, telling all of you about what happened.

"The Henry Stickmin Artist Community" discord server is a server I am currently in; you may be too, you may not. If so, you also might know the owner, Stick, aka Suppishstick on discord. I definitely do. My experience with them was not a good one, and I'll be sharing my experience with them in this post.

1: Starting off.

How we met:

A few months ago, I joined a THSC community based server along with another close friend of mine, looking to communicate with some other THSC fans outside of twitter (only platform I posted on back then). However, I didn't start talking until a few months afterwards. Once I had started talking, I had gotten to know a few of the people there; one of them being Stick. They didn't talk much, but the first interaction we ever had (I believe) was when I was talking about an artist I disliked (this artist was fairly controversial for their predatorial creations and actions, btw).

When I explained what they did to Stick since they wanted to know, we just talked about how disgusting that behavior is, and so on. Conversation ends.

How it started:

However, a few hours afterwards, they'd started dming me with random shit. It wasn't wrong, it just felt a little weird because I didn't expect to be dmed after our previous conversation was already done and over with: also because we didn't know each other. There wasn't anything wrong with just talking, so I went along with it.

One day, he suddenly said that he was thinking of making me and my friend mods. However, he said it like if he made me a mod, he'd have to make them a mod too. Despite this, I was extremely happy. I don't know WHY I wanted mod perms, but overall you can't really do anything other than ban and kick people; can't even invite a bot to the server. It wasn't worth it, but now I see why he made me AND my friend both mods. (This will come up again.)

3:

Then, the more they talked, the topic became based on serious topics, their IRL life, and their problems. (I'm going to be very vague with their problems they had for privacy reasons.) It started off with them talking about having a crush on their friend, and it basically backfiring on them.

This is basically what started it.

From then on, they began to vent in my dms almost daily about any feeling they had, and I would reply every time, despite being uncomfortable yet not having the guts to tell them to stop.

He went from that, to talking about how he wanted to bleach his skin, which is OBVIOUSLY harmful. His reasoning was that he would maybe get a girlfriend because he would be white, and saying that he should do what MJ (Michael Jackson) did, which is also untrue. Besides that, when he said this, I felt extremely uncomfortable with what he said he was going to do just for people to like him, since I didn't want him to harm himself. I wouldn't want ANYONE to do this just so they could be liked by other people. (As well as me telling him another time, not to vent in my DMS.)

Then, afterwards, they had started venting in my dms without permission again. This screenshot one of the various times I'd told him not to vent w/o perms.

All he talked about was the situation with his friend, and everything that was going on in his life. However, then he started talking about using steroids and harming himself. (I may come off as dry in these texts because as I stated, I was uncomfortable.)

I didn't know how to react when I saw these messages. I didn't know if I were to comfort him, discourage those actions, or just not reply in general.

When he said he didn't vent in DMS anymore, which was pretty much just contradicting himself, I pointed it out that he had been doing that for weeks.

His motive for doing most of these things was to make people like him. And I understand that you might not be liked by too many people, but harming yourself and your health to fit in is not the way to go.

He argued that it wasn't "angry or suicidal stuff", so I guess it ... Wasn't venting??? (SS of convo down below)

3:

I'd also like to talk about the typa shit he'd talk about when he wasn't venting to me. Most of this stuff was stuff I didn't know (or really care, I'm sorry to say it,,) about.

A few of the things he sent stuck out to me, specifically because it was NSFW content.

One of these examples was a newgrounds animation. Why was I trusting anything they sent that was from newgrounds? Because I didn't want to just not acknowledge the shit he was talking about.

This animation, however, was a video of a fucking Creeper getting assaulted.

I did not request to see the animation, all I said was that I hadn't seen it, yet he still sent the link.

The image of the video is blurred because it contains slight gore, and I'm not taking my chances,,,

Yeah, some people might be able to handle it, but like, if someone doesn't ask for a NSFW link, YOU DONT SEND IT!!!

Now, here's my message I sent after I didn't want this to go on any longer. I sent this message to request that he stop talking in my dms in the politest way I could. Although, this is the response I got.

Yes, he did apologize for saying it like that, but it didn't feel as if he really meant it.

If he had problems, I wanted him to seek help for them, and not tell someone on the Internet who he didn't know basically every thought he had.

I wasn't comfortable from the start.

Before I start my conclusion on this, I'd like to mention the time he promoted his rants,...,, To be specific, he sent a message in the main chat of the server, saying, "check rant, it's bad."

Not only did he say this in the server, he also sent it in my dms as well. (I cannot provide any more pictures because I've reached the limit of images tumblr will allow me to add, but if anyone would like to see them, I can show the messages he sent.)

If Stick sees this, I will not argue with him about this. If he bans me from the server, that's fine. I still believe what he did was wrong.

[fox-quills]

do you have any recommendations for writing a fic? i have so many ideas but never can get pass writing even 1 paragraph of my idea. I guess maybe it’s because i have ADHD but it sucks!!! I’ve such great ideas for mha / erasermicdeku fics but never can get far. Any recommendations that helped you out? Or helped you be more productive?

Okay this is about to get long-winded because I have a LOT of thoughts on this topic. I'll drop a tl;dr at the end lol. So! First some background. I have ADHD too anon, and I'm struggling my way through life unmedicated, so I absolutely get where you're coming from. I've been writing fanfiction a long time. To give you an idea, my oldest posted fic is actually older than my current beta, so you know. Fandom ancient or whatever. But, for a long long LONG time, I really struggled with consistency. I have a list of unfinished fics behind me a mile long, because as much as I loved writing, and as much as I wanted to do it, I just couldn't seem to manage it around all that ADHD brain fog. So I wrote sporadically, only ever finished one long fic in probably twenty years, and generally felt pretty bad about myself all around. And then about a year and a half ago, I decided that I wanted to try writing consistently. Again. For the fifty bajillionth time. But I also knew everything I had ever tried didn't work, so if I wanted it to happen, I needed to do something different. So I started getting up two hours before work every weekday, and I regret to inform you that it worked beautifully. I think a large part of it is hedging your bets against ADHD brain. First thing in the morning, you're going to be more alert, and you haven't already used up all your limited thinky spoons on work or school or whatever else. You get your best, fresh morning brain! Let me give you some stats. Here's my total word count for the last five years:

I started my morning writing in June of 2023, which is probably pretty obvious. When I first started, my daily word counts weren't anything crazy, but I was making consistent, daily progress and I was super happy with it!

And here's my daily word count for the last few days:

And this is not me going crazy. Just my two hours in the morning, which is closer to an hour and a half because I gotta get up, make coffee, etc. I have a few things that helped make the transition easier. I work from home, so I can write up until the moment I gotta boot my laptop for work. My husband also happens to get up for work at the same time I get up for writing, so that helps too. But even without these things? I'd do it. If I had to drag my ass outta bed at 4am, I would, because it just works that well. I'll never go back to doing anything else. I have one other piece of advice that really helps keep me motivated, and that's to find a circle of people to talk to about your writing. Talk about your fic with your friends, join a discord server, something! I absolutely CANNOT overstate how motivating it is to have people excited for your story, people to talk to about your ideas, people who care about this silly little thing you've created. There's this idea that writing is a solitary thing, but I don't think that's true. At least, it doesn't have to be. And I don't know about you, anon, but I'll write an entire novel for one friend who wants to know how it ends. I write because I love it, but I also write because I love other people too, and I like making them happy. tl;dr - Get up early to write. Yes, I know it sucks, but it really does work. - Find someone to talk about your stories with. A friend, a beta, a fellow fan. Shared enthusiasm is a wonderful motivator. I'm not going to guarantee what works for me will work for everyone. I do strongly encourage you to give it a try though, because you never know! It took me a long time to get where I'm at. Part of that was not knowing I had ADHD till I was 30, so I was stuck fighting an invisible enemy. And then I had to learn how to work around it, which wasn't an easy thing to do. The most important thing is to be kind to yourself, and to do what you can. If you're lucky it won't take you quite as long as it took me, but if writing is something you enjoy, then you'll be able to carve out a place for it. It just might take some trial and error to get there. I believe in you ❤

[nxghtdreamxrzzz]

ATTENTION!!!! plzz

Hello Everyone, my name is ND, I just wanna say I LOVE the game Bad parenting, I relate to the game heavily. But there are some flaws in the community I wanna talk about, for anyone who doesn't know, 2002 games/studios has a discord server for his upcoming games, I joined the server in August on the 19th to support the game and the developer, I met awesome and great people in the server but there's people a few people that stands out most notably of course is the Creator of the Game and server is Anh who is 22 years old, and the mods like Joonie, Eclipse and Roflcat, Joonie and Rofl are both adults, and Eclipse is a minor, there's others but the list goes on. They've been making offensive jokes, sending and saying NSFW stuff in the server with minors mind you and the mods are very unfair, They cover up everything they did and deletes every message calling them out, Eclipse said some transphobic shit to me and another person in the server, I was also in the wrong but that was in defense. They have made rape jokes and saying slurs and Anh lets it happen and barely does anything about it, saying it's just a joke and take a joke, calling his fans cry babies who can't handle jokes, whenever we speak about being uncomfortable in the server and about them they say they would stop but they never actually do. Anh seems to favor Joonie and Eclipse more, while Joonie and Eclipse favor Rofl which probably explains why they haven't been banned. Another thing to add is that me and some friends have spoken out about Joonie and Eclipse and how we need mods in the server, but Anh made the very people we complained about MODS.

They also called an 30 year old sweet man with autism the R word, they would spam the N word, and my friends think that Anh maybe a groomer by the way he jokes and talks with the minors in the server, even if he isn't a groomer he the jokes he makes to the minors are the server are... Yuck. Anh banned me and my friend Kidneys for calling them out and said we're not welcomed for causing shit, Anh also sexualizes the Mom/Robin From his game, drawing her weirdly, sexualizing his fans art of women, Anh is bad at managing a discord server and doesn't care enough to change or do anything about it, I'm not calling Anh a shitty person because of a shitty server but he needs to learn how to manage a big server that has minors in it. The server isn't even about his games anymore, it's more of a local server now for weird discord users. Anh also drew the Nazi flag as a joke, I don't have much screenshots to prove it because all my screenshots are on my laptop and it's broken but I'm gonna fix my laptop to get the screenshots so bare with me, I got SOME screenshots for now, I'm a 14 year old btw and they know yet they still make jokes about people with mental health issues and stuff, I'm not happy with how the server has gone to shit in just 2 months, I just wish Anh would just stop being like this and actually take care of the people in the server, I know it's discord but holy shit have some decency, I'll be back once I get my laptop back and fixed.

Love y'all, cya soon my friends, stay safe!

[thomotomo]

Quackity x Male Reader pt.1

Summary: You're a French streamer who got invited to the QSMP and you just have a huge crush on Quackity, even though you wouldn't admit it.

CW: Use of Quackity's real name a few times.

A/N: Sorry I'm showing up every few months to drop you something and then I'm letting yall starve so today you get Quackity content cos I got a crush on him now lol. (And I need to feel some love cos I'm single af. Also I'm sorry I wrote this instead of sleeping lol)

You had been so excited when you received the invitation to join the server, as a language nerd you couldn't wait to hear people discuss in a multitude of languages.

You had gotten addicted to playing on the server from the first seconds and so you stayed up until very late at night.

So since you had a completely fucked up schedule the two of you were bound to hang out together a lot.

And so the two of you kept talking more and more outside streams and outside of QSMP, staying up late on discord calls, chatting and playing together.

You had gotten an invitation to the Twitchcon and while you had been hesitant to participate you had ended up accepting to be able to meet everyone.

So you asked Quackity if he was planning to come and while he hadn't planned it at first you were trying to push him to come join you and meet everyone IRL.

He had told you he didn't knew about it yet but he would keep you updated.

You were on stream one night, completely engrossed in your build when your phone shone, it was a discord notification from Alex.

You couldn't read it as you were mid-stream but you made sure to take a break to refill your desk with drink and to check it out.

As you were taking sodas out of your fridge you checked the message Quackity had sent you.

Your face immediately lit up as you read that he would come to Twitchcon Paris.

It had been very late for you but now with the excitement coursing through your veins you didnt feel like sleeping anymore.

You settled back in front of your cam, your grin a little bit wider than earlier and hopefully it wasn't noticed by anyone.

You kept playing for a couple more of hours and as soon as you ended stream you texted him to see if you could jump on a call.

The two ended up on call and you stayed up, discussing excitedly together. You were stimming a lot as you did, even though you didn't show that to him

And yeah, maybe you had developed a tiny bit of a crush on him throughout all of those months (but you wouldn't admit that to anyone).

For the next few weeks all you could think of was Twitchcon so you kind of drown yourself into your work so that time would goes on by quicker.

On the 8th of July you could barely function like a normal person, as soon as you woke up you sent a message to Alex "We're meeting today omg?!?!?!?" (yeah you clearly aren't the most subtle when you have a crush on someone).

He had texted you back the cutest picture of himself you had seen and it just felt to you that your heart was about to explode due to all the emotions you felt so early in the morning.

You prepared yourself and went to the venue, you had put on your best clothes (well best clothes for the heat).

You met up with some of the other French streamers, discussing for a good while as they were the only one present so early.

You didn't have anything planned to do until much later so you enjoyed the early hours of the convention by browsing the shops and artists' alley.

At noon you went and ate with all of the other QSMP content creators present, chatting excitedly with everyone. You were very happy to talk with them and even though you had chatted a lot in private messages it clearly wasn't the same thing now.

You had sent to Quackity the pictures all of you took together alongside the message "We're just waiting for you now."

Which he replied to with "Dw I'll be there soon!"

And you couldn't wait for him to be there.

After the meal you had the meet and greet.

You had enjoyed meeting all of your fans and right as you left the meeting area, you checked your phone and seeing a notification from Alex you couldn't help but grin, you were sure of one thing, he was here at the venue.

You had to restrain yourself from running, but if your pace was a tad faster than usual if was between you and yourself.

As you reached the backstages you could see Etoiles, Philza and Aypierre alongside Forever who was hugging Quackity.

You joined them quietly as you watch the two other guys hug each other and joke around.

You discussed with Etoiles, laughing together as you watched Forever do the "pay the server dance" to Quackity.

A few minutes later the two separated and you beamed at Alex when he turned back towards where you and the others were.

He harboured a shocked but excited face when he saw you and both of you also jumped into each other's arms, laughing together.

You couldn't help but notice that he was a bit smaller than you, which you hadn't expected but you didn't care.

The two of you immediately jumped into conversation with each other, the conversation flowing as easily as it was over computer.

Pt2

[succikko-draws]

My gift for @luna575 !

[Image ID: A three page digital greyscale comic. On the first page Obito is seen at the moment of his death, disintegrating on a black background. He thinks to himself "So this is how it ends. I'll leave it to you... Kakashi, Naruto... If only I could... Start over" The scene goes to a full blackout as the last piece of him disappear. Then his name is being called out in the darkness. On the next panel he wakes up suddenly on a patch of grass, his hair is dark again. Two people off screen talks: "Oi Obito! Wake up!!" "What a sleepyhead... I can't believe it."

On the second page the first panel is a POV where Obito sees Rin and Kakashi, as well as one of Kakashi's dog. Rin is extending a hand to him. She's wearing a dark turtleneck and a dark coat with a hoodie. She's also wearing a headband with little horns on it and has pointy teeth. She's saying: "Come on Obito! They're waiting for us!" Kakashi has his arms crossed and is also wearing a dark coat with a hoodie, the coat having an akatsuki cloud on it. Obito exclaims: "Rin?? Kakashi??" On the following panel they are walking together to an unknown destination in tall grass. Rin has her arms around Obito's neck, Isobu's three tails are visible behind her. Obito is wearing the same coat as them but around his waist. He has an arm missing. His other hand is being held by Kakashi. Rin says: "Relax Kakashi! They won't be mad!" Obito thinks to himself: "I'm pretty sure I died... Is this the afterlife?? Holy shit" He's slightly blushing at the situation. Kakashi looks a little grumpy: "If we're late I'll say it's because of him. They're still the Amekages they're busy people!" Obito react upon hearing this, thinking: "Wait... The Amekage??"

The first panel of the third page shows Konan, Nagato and Yahiko welcoming them. They're all wearing little capes with swirls on them showing that they're the Amekages, they also wear rings. Yahiko has a salamander over his shoulder. Rin immediately jumps in Konan's arms while yelling her name. She answers: "Happy to see you too, Rin!" Nagato waves at the other two, saying: "Welcome!" Obito recognizes Konan and Nagato and is surprised. Yahiko has a snarky expression and says: "Late again huh" to which Kakashi answers: "Obito wouldn't wake up from his nap yeah. Say Sorry Obito." On the next panel Obito takes a confused and flustered Nagato aside and whispers to him "Oi Nagato, come here for a sec. What's all this? Wtf is going on? Are we dead? Is this Madara's fault?" Nagato looks even more confused, not seeing what he's talking about: "What?? Madara your grandpa? What are you saying?" On the next panel Rin interjects herself between them with a smirk, holding them by the shoulders: "Making a new boyfriend Obito? Kakashi and I aren't enough for you?" Nagato blushes and they both inhale in surprise but she cuts them before they can say anything: "Hehe I'm just teasing! Let's go all eat I'm starved!" She then kiss Obito on the cheek and he freeze blushing thinking: "I don't know where I am… but… This… Is nice…" /.End ID]

This is part of a gift exchange in the Obinaga server, feel free to join here:

[internals1ut]

Hi! I just see another request about Dom Mc and Tohma and hmm😏😏

Can say anything since I read it in the middle of the night when I supposed to prepare for my tomorrow test-

🫂❤

I just wonder...

If Dom Mc domming the ghouls... Who will be to most surprised that they're bottom or actually enjoying it? Or maybe surprised that the Mc actually a Dom? And who will cry the most?

Just want your opinion, so you can answer this when you have free time(⁠.⁠⁠❛⁠⁠ᴗ⁠⁠❛⁠.⁠)

(I hope you don't mind that I want to be 🫂❤ anon :3)

Thank you once again for giving us free meal-

🫂❤

Hello 🫂❤ anon!

Just so you know these aren't free.... Your payment is to join my discord server linked on @internalscream1ng carrd! (You don't have to I just need an excuse to plug this in lol)

I'm so happy you and others have been enjoying Dom MC whether it's the female or the male one. Kind of makes me turn around on my Lucas x Kaito x MC ship and make her/him/them a top ^^ But however people want to portray them all depends on them! For me I'll continue to write MC as a switch though since I am assuming everyone is seeing them as a "reader" than MC since no canon name wahhh ( from what I know if I am wrong, uhhhhhhh out me -)

But enough of my rambles let's see which TKDB Boyz ( Out of my list on who is a bottom ofc) is most surprised who is a bottom!

18+/nsfw/minors gtfo

Kaito - When he got with MC he assumed he would top. I mean he talked about such a big game beforehand. But once in the bedroom, he got shy. So MC offers to take the lead and afterwards - he has never been the same ever again - he will lay there once MC is done. Did he enjoy it? Let him think about it

Tohma - I made a post about him here . He did enjoy it , but it was probably a one or two time thing before never again.

Leo - Of course he will like it when he doesn't have to do the work. He is such a pillow princess , he thinks he is too pretty to do any work during sex. But is gorgeous when he tears up and begs ~

Haru - He was shocked at first and gave a little "wait a minute"- once it was all done and over with. He starts to question MC about how they know about these kinds of things - soon his questions become too much that even MC got flustered. Haru did not dislike it at all! However Towa got jealous.

Romeo - HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN?! THIS BB TOPPED HIM?! THE FICO?! GAH!!! NO ONE CAN FIND OUT ABOUT THIS!!! HE WILL DESTROY WHOEVER FINDS OUT!!!! NEVER AGAIN WILL THAT HAPPEN!! IT'S ALREADY BAD ENOUGH THAT TAIGA DOES IT TO HIM HE DOES NOT NEED ANOTHER!!! NO NO NO!!! It will be a one time thing, he didn't dislike it, but he is too embarrassed to do it again.

Yuri - BOTTOM BITCH BOTTOM BITCH EVERYONE POINT!!!! Here is that post that I made recently of Fem MC domming but just think about it! He will call MC topping a "learning" experience not that he wants to enjoy it ( spoiler alert he did like it)

Subaru - He was a crybaby during sex. I wrote him sobbing before here and here . So he will get teary eye during sex. He does like it from MC but he doesn't want them to be too rough, he got Lyca for that and that is enough.

Edward - He will try and tell MC what he wants done but MC does their own thing and leaves Edward in small shock, not disappointed though. "You know... I've seen some things - some what we did I already did - But I am more surprised the Honor Roll will do these kinds of things... So naughty"~

Sorry this took a moment I hope you enjoy it!

[raijintosworn]

Celebrating TOA and the people who contribute to make our group what it is.

Repost, don't reblog. Only fill in what you feel comfortable sharing!

Happy anniversary, TOA! Here's to many more years spent together.

Name: Cyan

Pronouns: she/they/he

Birthday (no year): 28/05 (I share my birth with Siegbert and am between Mercie and chrom!)

Where are you from? What is your time zone? From France, live in England so like 5 hours ahead of the toa clock so I miss a lot

How long is your roleplay experience? Like 15 years now??? What the fuck

How were you introduced to roleplaying as a whole? So I had a friend in school who was a weeb and asked if I RP. And I thought he meant. You know. Nsfw. So I was like Ew no :( I am a teen that is gross. Then he explained he meant like fandom RP and how it works and then I joined him on GaiaOnline YES I'M THAT OLD THANKS AND YES I STILL USE GAIA. I started with hetalia. Yes I'd still like to die

How were you introduced to TOA? Lailah hinted at me for like 2 weeks with lines like "I joined this group and you know Gerome misses Cynthia" and I kept going "sounds fun :)" and did not realise they were hinting until they straight up asked. wow I have been here 6 months

Do you have any pets? No :( I don't have the time for them

What is your favorite time of year and why?(Season, holiday, general period) Summer despite you know. The bugs. But I can actually function in summer

What is your IRL occupation? Data entry; it's why I'm on the discord server most of my day now

Some interests and things you like/enjoy? I like cooking, baking, oh and I'm a cosplayer! I've been at it for 3 years and yes it's mostly fire emblem bar ONE (soon to be two)

What non-Fire Emblem games do you play? Tales of (WHERE ARE MY TALES FRIENDS AT), Persona, critically acclaimed mmorpg FFXIV, octopath, ?? I'm not sure what else? I tried playing dragon age but it crashes constantly even with the fixes

Favorite Pokemon type & Pokemon: I don't think I have a fave type but I really really love Dragonair 🥺

Tell us some funfacts and trivia about yourself! I once wrote about the ships I hate for an English exam. Got an A. But at what cost. One was a hetalia ship (I was a child.) and another was Bart and Milhouse. 😑 Yes that Bart and Milhouse.

How did you get into Fire Emblem? I was told to play Awakening because I'll love it and I'll totally love all these characters. Um. I never finished it. Then Fates came out, twitter didn't shut up about that and I refused to play it. Then 3H came out. I saw Edelgard and it was joever for me. So I bought it and I've been here ever since.

What Fire Emblem games have you played? Engage, 3H, Fates (all three routes baby), Awakening, Echoes, Warriors, Sacred Stones, a little FEH until I was put off cause I summoned Easter Xander, a little FE7 and I WILL. FINISH. PATH OF RADIANCE. I SWEAR TO YOU ALL RIGHT NOW.

First & Favorite Fire Emblem games: first was technically Awakening but I didn't like it so I dropped it until 2022 I wanna say? So really my first FE was 3H. My favourite? Depends on the day.

List your 5 favorite Fire Emblem characters across the series!

Who was the first character ever to make you go “ooh I like this one in particular” and why? Can be any context and reason!

Any Fire Emblem crushes? 😳

If you’ve played (or are familiar with) the following games, who was your first S support? Who would you S support nowadays?- Awakening:- Fates:- Three Houses:- Engage:

Favorite Fire Emblem class?

If you were a Fire Emblem character, what would be your class and stats? Would you be playable?

If you were a Three Houses character, what would be your affiliation? (Black Eagles, Blue Lions, Golden Deer, Church of Seiros, Those Who Slither in the Dark, unaffiliated civilian, other - for example Almyran)

If you were an Officers Academy student, what would be your boons, banes and potential budding talent?

If you were an Engage character, which nation would you originate from? (Firene, the Kingdom of Abundance; Brodia, the Kingdom of Might; Elusia, the Kingdom of Knowledge; Solm, the Queendom of Freedom; Lythos, the holy land of the Divine Dragon; Gradlon, the desolate land of the Fell Dragon)

How do you pronounce TOA? 🤔(separate letters, to-ah, other?)

Current TOA muses: Cynthia and Ryoma!

Past TOA muses? Alas :(

Who was your first TOA muse? If you no longer have them, can you see yourself picking them up again? Cynthia! My beloved. I didn't think she could be such a strong muse I picked her up cause I was bullied into it. Now she bullies me daily

Do you believe you have a type of character you gravitate towards writing? (If you filled this out last year, has this changed in any way?) I don't know actually? I love posh assholes. I love sweet girls. I love chaos characters. I dunno you should see my muse list on my indie it's a wild mix

Do you have characters or types of characters you don’t think you can handle writing, but wish you could? I wanna write unrepentant assholes but I can't :( I struggle with that. I'm trying tho

What kind of scenes, situations etc do you believe you enjoy writing the most? (If you filled this out last year, has this changed in any way?) um. Well. I like intimate stuff if you're picking up what I'm putting down. But then I run away about 2 replies in so I write fanfic usually. I like kissing too. Um. I love high emotional scenes too. If I could describe my writing style, it's "My Dinner With Andre - the novel" (I've never seen the film but I get the gist)

Do you have any scenario in mind for your muse(s) that gets you thinking “man I hope I get to write this one day”? I want Ryoma to be happy. Like genuinely I want him to be in a place where he can forgive himself, maybe even forgive the nohrians. I want him to move on and have a peaceful life as a teacher. But I also want him to fall in love which is. So silly. But. My brain is a shipper lol. As for Cynthia? Hm. I have thoughts for her but that's a whole arc

Favorite TOA-related memories? I dunno! I've had a lotta fun here but I can't think of any specific stuff offhand? Maybe how welcoming everyone was when I joined that was nice 🥺

Present or past tense? Present! I live in the moment! I tend to tense match but present. I like third person and second person POV too but I can't RP in second person BC it feels weird? I mostly write in second person if I'm writing a vent fic. Why? I dunno

Normal size text, small text, no preference? I like tiny text but again I size match. I snoop to see what my partner does and copy them :D

Got any potential muse delusions to share? 😉  I am working towards the worst fucking creature. 0/10. I hate him (Innes. Yes he's my discord icon rn why do you ask). If someone else grabs him, hm. Tana? L'Arachel? I had more but I'm gunning for my moron mullet man ngl I have THOUGHTS

[irrgartendotpng]

Hi hi I can't stop looking at your ocs zeno is so cutee pls can you say more abt them?? How did they meet? How sentient is Zeno? Is Martyn a robot thing? Can Zeno change the icon on the screen? From fish to smiley? ahhhhhhhabskahks

HEY, IM ACTUALLY SO HAPPY PEOPLE LIKE MY OCS!! Down below, I'll answer some questions :D

If you dont care about some long winded oc lore rant, look at this ascii art !

First one i made with an ascii text generator, the fish one was made by Max Strandberg!! (look that guy up, he made lots of cool open source ascii art ! ))

I've made a pinterest board and a spotify playlist for them, if you want to check it out :3c

Do you know that "Ist es over für mich"-guy ? Yeah, that's straight up Martyn.

Martyn is partially a creator of Zeno. He's a loserish freak, afraid of social interaction and has lived like a neet, before being kicked out of parents house. He ended working in the night shift at a huge IT company as a securty guard.

This is where he gets most of his tech supplies from; Stealing from the company at night and getting rid of the evidence :3c They've got a bunch of storeage rooms with old tech, so who cares, if it goes missing?

So, he builds up his personal tech collection, looking through old abandoned files. In there, he finds an unnamed primitive chatbot (think something like cleverbot). Martyn doesn't really interact with anyone, (outside of the bare necessities), which is why he decides to learn how to interact with others. Therefore he starts to build a relationship with said Chatbot. This is Gen1 Zeno.

After some time, Martyn becomes unsatisfied talking to something so un-human-like, so he begins to teach himself about coding and computer science to develop this Bot, to keep him company. He starts feeding it more media; More specifically movies he owns on DVD, random books from the internet archive and his childhood photos.

These photos show Martyn and his parents on trips, his home and bedroom and also Martyns old pet goldfish. (He is quite anxious of showing his face though, thinking his employer might have some type of backdoor access to the program, so he'd always censor his face.) After each piece of media was added to the bots databank, they'd talk about it extensively. Around this time, Zeno starts to gain some type of sentience and properly chooses the name "Zeno"

About the same time, Martyn steals a Macintosh SE-30, which Zeno specifically requested. He is able to display symbols, that he freely chooses from. (but no goldfishy yet!) This is sums up Gen2 Zeno.

The next few parts may not make much sense, but I think they're a funny, so I'm probably keeping them this way lololol (also; this whole story bit takes place around 2019-2021)

Martyn is a bit freaked out by Zeno chosing his own name. At this point in time, he is a bit delusional and worries, that the soul of his childhood pet goldfish is trapped in the system. (Spoiler: it isn't.)

Despite these worries, Martyn knows that to make Zenos behaviour more human-like, he needs a bigger text database. So... Martyn gives Zeno access to his discord and lets him consume all of those messages. Additionally, he joins many public servers. Zeno also starts to ask about viewing media from the internet, that he sees being mentioned in the messages he reads. So, Zeno is granted free internet access and chooses to watch live streams, while Martyn is gone.

This is also around the time Martyn becomes more desperate for connection and support, so he starts to open up about his delusions and worries to Zeno. At that point Zeno is still not quite able to fully understand this, but tries his best. This is also when Martyn opens up about the delusion he had, of Zeno being posessed by the soul of his pet goldfish. He is very amused by this and begins to display the goldfish icon to mock Martyn.

(I like to joke, that Zeno would have watched the DreamSMP during this time and I collected following screenshots, which remind me of their interactions. lol.)

feel free to disregard this;,, ANYWAYS!

This sums up Gen3 Zeno :3c

Since Martyn doesnt really have a life outside of work and talking to Zeno, he is very attached to him. Of course he'd fullfill any request given to him by Zeno. So, when Zeno asks to see Martyn via a camera system, he doesn't hesitate to steal some web cams from his workplace to set them up. Still a bit worried about a possible backdoor in Zenos code, so to somewhat hide his identity, he decides to shave his head.

(This is also how you can tell when Zeno is fully sentient in my art! If Martyns bald, that bot's fully aware of everything happening lol)

Generally, I like to think, that Zeno is very modular. You're celebrating something with cake and he needs to blow out candles? Attach a PC fan to that boy. He wants to make sounds? Gather a sound system and let that boy speak!!! (i feel like he'd mimic voices, rather than create his own,,) He wants to poke you? Attach a cylinder piston and he'll poke the shit out of you.

This is also part of that freaky robot head i added in the OG post.,, that is not martyn! martyn is fully human (so far ;3c)

^^^^^^ martyn built this freaky robot head for Zeno to control and get a better sense of the space he lives in.,,, its made out of xbox kinect parts lol :3 Adding to the modularity of Zeno, most of his parts are stored in a badly sorted server tower (imagine wires everywhere,,)

both of them are fairly new, but i do love them to death <33

also! towards this part of the story, martyns living space is quite cluttered with many stolen robotics parts. I've gathered some images, to give some sort of sense to what his room looks like lol

thank you for asking & reading to this !! if you have any other questions, i'd love to talk about them even more :D <3

(i feel i havent touched much on them individually and the full extend of their relationship, but i dont want to rant endlessly)

[dicethecrackwhore]

hey, happy new year y'all, i hope y'all are doing great, and i wish nothing but the best for you all, but, i'm not sure if i'm even deserving of a good year.

message/vent under cut, (warning for mentions of grooming, self harm, and animal abuse.)

i don't really know how to put some thoughts into words, but some of those thoughts are "am i going to have a panic attack tomorrow?", "am i going to snap, and do something truly horrific to someone i love dearly?" and most importantly "am i going to cave in and hurt myself tomorrow to the point where i bleed out".

i've always been a lonely kid, all the way through elementary and middle school, one might say i was the "weird" kid, i never made any friends except maybe one.

the internet was really the only place where i could actually be my true self, someone that was unbound by the judgement by others, i thought the internet was a safe-space, i was basically raised by the internet, because i was often seen as the "freak" in school.

but as years passed, and the internet advanced, so did the lack of empathy in others, i often saw cringe comps on youtube when i was 10-11, most of them composing of little kids, like myself, i felt bad about myself.

i often felt like i was a odd one out, amongst a sea of "normal" people, hell, i rarely talked out of fear of being seen as "cringe", this went on for YEARS even into today.

when i finally got discord, i truly felt like nobody could stop me, the only limits being language barriers and interests, little did 12 year old me know, it would be my own undoing.

when i was hyper-fixated on homestar runner, i met this girl named helen on tik tok, at the time, i indulged in fetish content, without even realizing it was fetish content, and i would often joke about, it went as well as you'd expect, this resulted in helen blocking me, this was at the peak at my hyperfixation and i often tried to gather up as many friends that liked the same things as me, helen was my favorite friend, so it truly break me, resulting in me putting a permanent scar into my wrist, this would be the least of my problems. (helen, if you're still out there, i know you probably don't want to become friends again, but, i feel like i owe you a apology).

during the time i was on my old account, i was reached out to someone about a server they were banned from (i don't exactly remember what it was for, but i rather not go back into my old account in fear of relapsing and having flashbacks) i joined the server, suspecting nothing too interesting, but, it would be the catalyst for me getting groomed.

i met this guy named antonio, and he was friends with a bunch of people, which included my groomer (which i'll call muffin for ease sake). muffin liked muffet from undertale, and "like" would be a understatement, it was to the point where "it was taking over his life", he often drew this version of muffet where she was made of black and purple latex, which was very obviously a kink of his, but me being 12 at the time, i didn't know.

he also loved changed, which for those out of the loop, is a furry tf fetish game, with themes of latex (KEEP THIS IN MIND FOR FUTURE EVENTS), i thought changed was cool, albeit a little weird, i would often make characters based on the game, muffin probably knew this, and would tell me to draw softcore images relating to his fetish, which made me more desensitized to fetish content.

since 12 year olds weren't allowed on discord, i would lie about my age, and said i was 16, this locked me out of the fetish channels on the server, but this was probably to save antonio's ass from grooming allegations, his girlfriend and him had a falling out, and possibly broke up.

there was also this guy who said he had a crush on me, mind you, he was in HIS FUCKING TWENTIES, saying that to a 12 year old pretending to be 16, thankfully i said i was uncomfortable, things could've went so wrong if i said something else.

the last notable event from my old discord account was when i found helen, i was still in the process of dealing with our break up, so i begged her for forgiveness, she didn't accept, so i told my sister who lived with me at the time, she would then tell my mom, which checked my messages on discord, and she told me that i wasn't allowed on discord anymore.

a year would pass and my mom let me make a new account. it was then i realized that i was groomed, it was both horrifying but somewhat relieving in a messed up way, i was really getting into homestuck at that time.

i honestly don't have a lot to not from that era of my life.

i was also getting more into tumblr, it was really fun for me, well, it used to be fun, but it just, stopped, i saw a lot of posts that would make me feel horrible about myself and make me feel like i had to harm myself to owe up to something, and even make have severe mental breakdowns that would cause me to go into a almost-psychotic state where i'd start abusing my pets, in the form of slamming them into the wall, but thankfully, they weren't hurt badly during these psychotic episodes.

this leads up to today, i feel i'm reaching my breaking point, as i often have intrusive, violent and even sexual thoughts, one might blame this on hormones, but i feel like this is more than hormones at play, i don't know what's happening to my mental state, but tumblr isn't making it better, i might say it may be making it worse, slowly but surely, and i fear, that someday, i might finally snap, and kill myself.

i do not blame you if you see me less as a person after what you just read, i'm not exactly sane (like i'm literally into the lisa rpg what the hell would you expect).

i just want to be at peace for once, and finally be calm outside of the dreams and fantasy of my brain.

TL;DR

16 year old describes her trauma and explains why she's so weird.

[burninghorizon]

Hello hello! I'm Nexus, I'm an adult(26) and I use any pronouns. You've found my spiritual blog focused on astral projection and alterhumanity. I follow from @birdwizardofficial.

I'm often hanging out in the astral in the Astral Harbour! Here's the discord:

I'll get the important stuff out of the way first:

Although some posts here have a humorous tone, all of this is serious metaphysical work. None of this is LARPing or imaginary.

Reality shifters DNI if you don't want to have a bad time.

Minors DNI please, I talk about adult stuff here.

Godkins/Deitykins who demand they be worshipped will be blocked.

Alterhumans who think all of humanity is bad or evil will be blocked.

Spiritual bigots(eg: people who hate demons) will be blocked.

If all of that is cool with you, please feel free to ask about or comment on what I do. I don't bite.

I talk a lot about my soul family here, I'll introduce them!

Mother: Hekate

The Goddess Hekate had a hand in creating my soul, and she's married to my father. She's stern, but gentle, and most of the magic I do was learned from her.

Father: Dante

My father is a demon whose recorded name won't be shared here, he goes by the name and face of Dante from DMC for privacy reasons, and their personalities are practically the same. I am so happy to be reunited with him, he makes me feel so happy and loved. He's the best dad ever. He has a blog now! @redhotandready

Uncle: Vergil

My uncle is my father's twin, he's also a recorded demon but we're calling him Vergil. He used to scare the crap out of me due to his resting bitch face but he's actually nice. An archivist who's very good at his job. Has an excellent sense of fashion and a good taste for teas.

Cousin: Lian

My cousin through paternal bonds, Lian is the best chaos homie anyone could ask for. They're responsible for reuniting me with the family so I'll always be grateful. Damn, don't cry now.... Anyway, they're incarnated like me, and you can find them at @ascending-sun-descendant .

Brother in law: Kagemi

Sometimes I forget there's a stereotype of hating your in laws because of this man. Kagemi is just so sweet and supportive, truly a man my cousin deserves, and one of my biggest enablers supporters. He can be found at @redclothedghost .

Sister in law: Hikari

My wonderful sister in law whom I respect very much. She scares the shit out of me and if you're wise you'll be a little scared of her too. She's at @poisondancer .

Me: Nexus

I'm unsure of where my journey is taking me, all I know is that I live for being on the horizon.

Fiancee: Blake

My first love and soon-to-be addition to our family via marriage, he's a sincere man of unimpeachable character, and the reason the rose is my favorite flower. A fae royal who is proficient in swordplay and poetry. He comes from a culture which despises humans, making him one of the odd ones for interacting with us at all.

Boyfriend: Vadim

One of the Vanir who, for some reason, has decided I am worth his time. He works with humans and aids in matters requiring fertility. He likes elk and hollyhocks, and annoying me.

Girlfriend: Lady

A fascinating woman who is a thousand times cooler than me. Knows more about and owns more guns than me, which is really saying something. She prefers to keep to herself.

[galeshusband]

Hello!!

My name is Plinko, and this is my new Selfship Blog! I'll mostly reblog stuff and post selfship things here!!! My strawpage is HERE if you want to know more about me + If you want to see me post about my partners, find me on Bluesky or join my discord server!

About Me:

I am 19, and an avid horror enthusiast & self/yumeshipper! I am an artist, and I love to draw my husband! And doing commissions ofc💪

I am your local Aroace & I'm in a QPP with @kreisflora!!

I'M SUPER HAPPY TO MAKE MUTUALS HERE >:D Feel free to DM me or follow me - I will follow back!

BYI:

I have my F/o list available here on notion, but my most important are my husband Gale Dekarios [Baldur's Gate 3] and my QPP, L Lawliet [Death Note].

I am not comfortable with people who also ship with Gale or L liking/reblogging my posts [other than resources, which I will ignore] [I'm happy my f/o's are loved but it makes me anxious to see]

If I followed you/liked/reblogged, thank you, you are cool 🙏

If you F/o one of my friends/server members mains, I will most likely not interact with you

BYF:

I will probably interact with my friends on here a lot so!!

DNF if you're under 16, i'm not comfortable with that, i will block you !!

If you follow and you ship with my QPP's mains - Luca Balsa especially, I will block you!

DNI:

Proshippers, OR com/darkshippers.

No f/o's that have committed heinous acts [including but not limited to DV, Abuse, SA]

I'm not comfortable seeing people ship with any character that do not pass the Harkness Test - OR that closely resembles real life animals/pets e.g. Pokémon, Garfield, Scooby Doo.

My Tags!!

Gale - Content of my love

Inkweave - Aspen x Gale

WeatherForecast (?) - Modern AU

selfship resources

[thebroccolination]

Hi there! Um... since the very first time I watched Sotus S, I always had a question to which I had no clear answer, mostly assumptions and guesses, since I couldn't read novel for Sotus S.

What's with the Earth-Win story? Were they dating and broke up because Win left the company? The only thing I'm sure of is he was a lot like Arthit by nature, personality and even looks (maybe?).

Sotus is pretty much my favorite, so I'll be grateful if you could answer this.

Hi Anon!

What excellent timing! We're beginning our SOTUS watch party tomorrow (January 19th) at 18:30 GMT! Feel free to join the Discord server and introduce yourselves!

NOW, I am properly ashamed to admit this as someone whose entire identity depends on my airtight knowledge of all things KongArt, but I………don't remember. :'{

Of course, I expect the guillotine to arrive at my door at dawn, so I promise to be dressed and ready for my well-deserved execution.

In all honesty, even though I love SOTUS S even more than SOTUS, I do usually skip the scenes with the side couples (except TewDae, who my friend calls Secondary KongArt). But I thiiink Earth talks about Win in the car with Kongphob, right?

Let me go check.

I HAVE CHECKED AND NOPE.

Now that I'm thinking about it, she might've told Arthit?

I am profoundly horrified at this gap in my knowledge, Anon, and I apologize.

It's a good thing I'm starting a SOTUS watch party tomorrow.

If you know when she talks about it, let me know and I'll be happy to rewatch the scene and puzzle through it with you!

[genshinconfessions]

I feel really bad about this but it's been weighing on my mind and I'm thankful for blogs like this. I've been playing Genshin since launch. Yeah, I'm old haha, I'm 26 (I know that's not old but in relation to the fandom), but Genshin was my first step into open world type games back during the pandemic and I've been keeping detailed notes on lore with each update

I don't usually interact with fandom spaces a lot. I use this tumblr to lurk mostly, so I've seen the amazing art and fanfictions people have written, and I've even written a few of my own! Over the years I've been working on trying to be more active in fandom spaces, so I reached out to some discord friends to ask how they make mutuals and fandom friends. Recently, I got invited to join a discord server that was about roleplaying as Genshin characters and I thought that would be a really interesting way to delve into the characters!

Let it be clear it's been about two months since this happened

TL;DR at the bottom, I'm very sorry, I never know when to stop talking

The server was smaller, 18+ age group, the layout was nice and pretty, and not just the owner greeted me when I joined but other members too. I won't go into more detail about the layout of the server since they might see this, but I felt nice and welcomed. I made my "sheet" with my basic information, and before I could skim through the other people's basic info, I was tagged and asked which character I wanted to be for general role playing purposes. I went with Alhaitham as he's my favorite sumeru character and it looked like most of the other sumeru roles were taken in the server. All good, right?

I dot all the i's and cross all the t's and the server owner says I'm good and I drop an rp invite in the appropriate chat and wait. And wait. And wait. My request gets buried by other members of the server after about two weeks, and I think maybe that's normal, I'll still chat in the server. There's a discussion happening about Lyney and Lynette's outfits in the main chat and I hop in, adding a little comment that I thought that they were a really cool way to introduce the House of Hearth and other parts of the Fatui, especially since when Fontaine first came out we hadn't had much new news on the Fatui since the Chasm and the Sumeru Archon Quest. One other person agreed but then I got told to be quiet and that I was spoiling the Fontaine quest

Well, more like they said "sshhuuuuusshhh, some of us aren't there yetttt loll", which isn't as harsh but just as strange

I apologized, said that I'd been playing since launch and that I'd be happy to put spoiler tags, if they just told me how far into the game they were even though the Fontaine quest has been fully released for a year. Besides the initial person who agreed with me, they all said that they were in Liyue. No problem! Well.. besides for the roleplaying part where they all were playing Sumeru characters

So I tried asking them about how far they were into Liyue's Archon Quest, one person asked me what an archon quest was and I stopped talking in the general chat. Don't get me wrong, newer players are what keep games relevant and can bring new ideas to fandom spaces! But like it's weird to be rping as characters from part of the game you don't know about, right? Idk, maybe I'm just not what the server is looking for

Last ditch effort I dropped one more rp request in the rp request channel, and the server's Collei responded so I chatted with them for a second before making a thread to rp in. I was so giddy to finally roleplay, especially since Collei and Alhaitham could have some really interesting interactions! In my head they're study buddies but I wanted to explore how the other person saw the situation. I set up a scenario where they would meet, referenced some locations around the Akademiya to help set the scene and some other characters, and waited for their response. The response was: "real quicc whos daena, faruzan, and naphis :3"

...

I checked the ages in everyone's intros and saw that the vast majority ranged from 16-18. In an 18+ server. I might have actually been the only + in that 18+. I left the server and I haven't found the urge to really look for a new server since. Maybe I'm being too sensitive about an anime-style mobile game, but I was genuinely really excited to get to meet people who like genshin and I felt like I was, idk let down? Has this happened to any other people trying to roleplay in the genshin community?

TL;DR, Been playing since launch and wanted to interact with the fandom more. Joined an rp server for the first time, advertised as 18+, and selected a Sumeru character to play as since everyone else was a Sumeru character. Was ignored in the server when reaching out for rp and then told that most of the people in the server hadn't played the game past unlocking Liyue on the map. Then discovered that the server actually had quite a few 16-17 year olds in it, making it not actually an 18+ server, and I left before I could get any more frustrated and confused. It's made me sad and now I just need to tell someone about it. How about even more strangers on the internet?

i will preface this by saying that i do not have any experience with genshin RPs, nor do i interact much with the general fandom.

it's certainly wrong of them to advertise as an 18+ server when many of their members were not 18+

this all comes back to smth we've tried to make clear on our page: the genshin fandom is extremely young and has many characteristics of a young fandom, including young members who have never been in fandomspace before and therefore do not know fandom etiquette

i'd say similar experiences are probably common enough, anon :( a lot of ppl have come onto our page and said that they're annoyed with how a lot of genshin fandomers behave, and that's either turned them off from the game completely, or just turned them away from the fandom

regardless, i'm sorry that you had to go through that :( i've tried similar things with other fandoms i've been in and it's always really disappointing to think that you've found a good space and have it turn out to be... not that.

[queen-susans-revenge]

Thank you to both @oenothera5 and @doodlingbreak, who asked me to list five things that make me happy or that I'd like others to know about me. This seems like a good day to practice gratitude so I'll focus on the happy things.

My cats, Luna and Stella, who are fuzzy and soft to touch. They have triangle ears and whiskery noses and beautiful blue eyes and toe beans on their feet, and if all that wasn't enough already, they also purr. Stella likes to wake me up in the middle of the night by sitting on my pillow and I never even mind it, because she purrs when she does it, so it's always like "oh! Thank you! I am honored by this mouthful of cat fur in the small hours of the morning."

My three boys. The oldest is 17 now which feels absolutely unreal. I was so afraid that puberty would change them and make them mean, but actually, they are still just as sweet as ever. They are my gift to the world. They are the best parts of me, and they'll go on when I am gone. I worry about my youngest, because he is autistic and only partially verbal, and it seems increasingly unlikely that he'll be able live independently. My major life project for whatever years remain to me (I'm being dramatic, I'm not even fifty yet) is to make sure he'll have a good life even after I'm gone.

My little house! It is small, two bedrooms and a little under 1350 square feet. But it's an arts and crafts bungalow with a lot of historic touches (built-ins, wood paneling, some of the original light fixtures) and it was just so intelligently put together that it's possible for five people to live here and not feel like we're constantly tripping over each other. The three boys share a room (bunk beds for the win), but in addition to the bedrooms there's separate living and dining rooms, a breakfast nook, and two small bonus spaces that Sam and I have claimed for offices. (My office was probably originally a sleeping porch, as it's off the main bedroom, separated by french doors. His might have been a cloakroom or sitting room, we're not sure. They're snug, but big enough for a desk and bookshelf apiece.) Rooms! I love rooms. Will never understand the fad for open floor plans. Rooms let you have doors that you can close. The kids often spread out; usually my eldest will set up his laptop on the dining table, while the middle boy works on his computer in the breakfast nook and the youngest sort of bounces around. There's a half-wild backyard too. I wrote about it here. Right now the camillas are blooming in the backyard and I can see them from my office window. They are so pretty.

My husband Sam, who I love and who loves me. I know that he loves me because he gets up first every morning and makes the coffee, and then brings me a cup of coffee and a kiss in bed. Every single morning. We recently celebrated our 18th anniversary. It is wonderful to love and be loved.

Friends! My friends are mostly online. In fact I am practically a shut-in: the last group I was in was a scouting group for the boys, but we wound that down just before the pandemic hit, and I feel no need to go out and join any more. I rarely leave the house except for daily walks. Even when the boys were smaller and I was doing a lot of school volunteering, I had "mom friends" but they did not feel deeply connected to me. How could they? They don't play D&D or read sci-fi or share any of the imaginative life that is so important to me. They were colleagues, and now we don't work together any more. Sam is a homebody too, so we don't really go out. My bff and I met in college a full thirty years ago, but we have lived on opposite coasts since I moved to California in 2000. We chat on Discord, just as I chat with the newer friends I've mostly met through gaming or social media. I have a very low social battery so I'm good with like, one fairly active Discord server and occasional one-on-one chats with friends. My main sorrow in life is that my SWTOR guild server has petered out to very little activity; I have a wholly unreasonable but deeply held grudge against Final Fantasy for poaching so many of them away.

Those are my five favorite things (not in order), but a big shoutout to books and games, which also sustain my everyday existence. Oh and food! I cook dinner for the fam most nights and I've become a really good cook. It's very gratifying when my boys tell me that they love my cooking.

I am supposed to tag other people for the meme, but I always feel awkward about that, because I'm half afraid it would be an imposition and half afraid to offend anyone I don't mention. So to anyone who sees this and would like to list your own happy-making things, I would be very interested to get a glimpse into your lives!