#i'll get better at drawing u babe i promise

[kalpakita]

important and relevant ???

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

thank u @ckducky for drawing funny art of charlie's silly spear jealously and making THIS mental image pop into my head XD

Vaggie: "Thanks for doing this for us again, Ms. Rosie."

Rosie: "Oh my dear you know I'm just TICKLED PINK to help!"

Vaggie: "Well we really need it."

Charlie: "No we don't. I'm acting completely normally for this situation. I am being Totally Rational."

Vaggie: "Sweetie-

Charlie: "TOTALLY. RATIONAL."

Vaggie: "Charlie, you promised you'd be open minded about this...."

Charlie: "I am open! I just also know Rosie is going to AGREE with me on this!!"

Rosie: "Ohoho I suppose we'll see about that, won't we~?"

Rosie: "Now, why don't we put that spear away, hmm? And then the three of us can settling in for a nice long chat while you tell auntie Rosie all abut it!"

Vaggie: "Uh, actually. The spear has to stay."

Rosie: "Oh?"

Vaggie: "I'm kinda just dropping it off?"

Charlie: "Dropping IT off? Oh thanks Vaggie for coming alllllll this way- for the SPEAR."

Vaggie: "Them. I'm dropping THEM off."

Rosie: "... I'm afraid I don't quite follow? You came here for relationship advice, yes?"

Vaggie: "Right. Charlie's having relationships issues."

Charlie: "IT'S NOT AN ISSUE."

Rosie: "You mean, you and Charlie are having issues?"

Charlie: "THIS IS A NORMAL LEVEL OF FRUSTRATION!"

Vaggie: "No."

Charlie: "I'VE BEEN DEALING THIS THIS FOR Y E A R S AND HONESTLY I THINK I DESERVE A MEDAL FOR IT AT THIS POINT!!"

Rosie: "Charlie and... the spear?"

Charlie: "THAT BITCH!"

Vaggie: "Yeah."

Rosie: "I feel as though I understand even less. Isn't your spear-"

Vaggie: "Inanimate, yeah."

Charlie: "Oh don't let it fool you. It knows EXACTLY what it's doing-"

Charlie: "-SEE? SEE!! Look at it GLEAMING all SMUG in the sunlight, all nice and cozy where Vaggie so very CAREFULLY snuggled it into it's own chair-"

Vaggie: "Anyway thanks again Rosie for helping I gotta get back to the hotel."

Rosie: "I.... darling, I'm not sure this quite my...."

Vaggie: (ignores her) "I'll pick th- I'll pick CHARLIE up in an hour."

Rosie: "Wait-"

Vaggie: (smooching charlie's cheek) "Try to talk things out a bit, okay?"

Charlie: "Hmph! There's nothing TO talk about!"

Vaggie: "Okay. But venting to smeone might make you feel better?"

Charlie: "...maybe."

Vaggie: "Good. That's all I care about."

Charlie: (melting) "Yeah?"

Vaggie: "Yep~"

Charlie: "All you care about huh..." (sulking) "What about the spear."

Vaggie: "Literally just a spear, babe." (smooches her again) "Have fun with this, Rosie!"

Vaggie: (leaves)

Rosie: "......"

Charlie: "......"

The spear: (is a spear)

Rosie: "....right then! For this I think, tea will NOT be precisely what we need!" (pulls out a bottle) "One shot, or two?"

Charlie: "Did you know she RUBS that thing with OIL every night?"

Roise: (smiling and nodding) "Five shots it is then~"

[elliesflower]

i’ve seen discourse abt ellie being stone top or a switch and i’m curious to know how do u hc her? she’s so hot either way idk how to feel😵‍💫

top to bottom [ellie williams]

pairing; ellie x f!reader

an; thanks for this request!! i've never written headcanons before hehe ＊*♡( ⁎ᵕᴗᵕ⁎ ）

18+ only, mdni!!!

so i know a lot of people actually hc ellie as being a bottom, but i really think she's a switch, though definitely preferring to top.

she'd be fucking whipped for you, eager to please you in any way you want, making her perfect to top you—she's the type to anticipate all your needs, and she'd do anything to make sure they're met.

"i know you've had a stressful week baby, let me make it better. please? i'll make it all better, i promise..."

she's just so casually dominant. she has a filthy mouth in casual conversation, and an even filthier one when she has you in her bed or on the table or in the bathroom or behind the church. she always knows exactly what to say to push your buttons, to rile you up, to get you right where she wants you...she'll have you practically kissing her feet, begging to be fucked.

"i know, sweetheart, you've been so good today...so polite, doing everything i asked of you...why don't you lay down for me?"

i think she'd like fucking you any way she could, but fucking you with the strap has to be her favorite. the way your face twists up in pleasure as she pushes past that tight ring of muscle, starting slowly until you're begging for more—and of course, she'll give it to you.

"oh fuck yeah...c'mon babe, arch that back, lemme in...you feel that, huh? nice and deep, just how you like it?"

she's a fucking sex god. have you seen her fucking fingers? i just know that seeing the pleasure she brings you gets her off—the pretty sounds you make while she's stuffing you full, feeling your pussy clench around her fingers as she draws orgasm after orgasm out of you...i just know she could come untouched.

"ah ah, don't cover your mouth, princess, lemme hear those pretty noises you make...yeah, good girl, that's it..."

she's a fucking munch. PERIODT. END OF SENTENCE.

"always so fucking wet for me...lemme taste you, fuck, i gotta taste you..."

buuuuut, she's also a big softie. she'll do anything to make you smile, and doesn't always take sex so seriously. she laughs at herself sometimes, or takes the worst possible moment to make a joke like when she's about to make you cum on her face.

"sorry babe, i couldn't help myself!"

you always know she wants you to top when she asks you to "watch a movie." it's her perfect excuse to cuddle up in your arms while you rub her back, feeling her breaths get heavier and deeper the further your hand trails down, until the night ends with the movie long forgotten, and her coming all over your fingers.

"it's been a long day, babe. let's cuddle and watch a movie?"

she's a fucking whimperer when she's getting fucked, i just know it. she's a little bossy, tells you exactly how many fingers to use, tells you how to grind your hips while you're scissoring, but you'll always do it, because it draws the sweetest sounds out of her pretty pink lips.

"right there, right there...uh, uh, fuck..."

she just wants to be close to you all the time. days off together are the best—laying in bed all day, in between naps kissing sloppily and lazily grinding your hips together, taking turns coaxing gentle orgasms out of each other...there's nothing like it.

"i love you...so much...my everything...."

[newtonsheffield]

“I’m Prince Eric and I’m out to catch a little mermaid in my net”

Molly can expansion on this please????

Oh thank u, next Anthony, was going fishing one Halloween

And shout out to @ronandhermy for the vibes

It was one of the millions of questions, he'd asked her when they'd first been together, when they'd sat together on the floor of his flat, containers of takeaway food strewn all around them, her legs thrown over his.

"What's your favourite Disney Movie?"

She'd chuckled, resting her chin on his shoulder, "You have to promise not to laugh." He'd nodded apprehensively, anticipation swirling in his chest as she'd sighed, "I love the Little Mermaid."

His eyes had widened in surprise but he hadn't laughed, "Why would I laugh at that?"

"Because there's so many better female role models out there, but I...I get not feeling comfortable in your own skin, and wanting to be loved so desperately that you'd give up anything to have it."

Her eyes had been so soft and sweet and vulnerable, as she'd sat in his sweater, the sleeves pulled down over her hands and it had tugged in his chest, hooked him in like a fish on a line.

"I'll love you like that. And you won't have to give up anything I promise."

Her hands had tilted his chin upwards, her kiss searing, intertwining their lives together and the name had stuck.

Just when they were alone, when there was no one else around, when she was sick, or sad, or scared and she needed someone, needed him, to hold her together, to be the rock in the middle of a storm. Little Mermaid.

Come on, Little mermaid, let's go home.

Come to bed Little mermaid,

What are you doing so far from the sea, Little Mermaid?

He loved her, desperately, stupidly, ridiculously, enough that his ring shining on her finger didn't even feel like enough anymore. Enough that maybe he could never be close enough to her never be strong enough to support her, never be enough for her. But god he'd try.

Anthony had learned early on, that there was probably nothing he wouldn't do to see Kate smile. To feel the warmth of it on his skin, and the tightness of it in his chest. To make her happy, he'd do anything, be anyone she wanted. Which was why when Edwina announced her Halloween party, he knew what he to do.

"I'll take care of the costumes!" he'd said a little magnanimously, kissing the pink diamond of her engagement ring still a little fresh and new on her finger, humming delightedly as he fingers had scratched at his scalp until he'd lay down against her, his head resting in her lap, her lips between his eyebrows, and then the tip of his nose, then his chin.

"You know I can't show up wearing one of those costumes right, honey?"

He'd rolled his eyes, chasing her lips, "This is completely for you, trust me."

He'd scoured everywhere for the perfect costume, grinning with joy when it had arrived at his office and he'd scooted home two days before the party, finding Kate in the room he'd made into an office for her, the huge windows filtering sunlight in, Notting Hill sprawling on underneath them, one paintbrush between her teeth, another in her left hand as she delicately detailed something... a snowman he realised when he got closer, a corgi grinning up at it menacingly. A gentle hum falling from her lips when he leant down and kissed the top of her head.

"Your costume arrived today."

Kate slowly washed her paintbrushes, turning away from her drawing desk just a little a slightly nervous look on her face as he slid the shipping box towards her. "What is it?"

Anthony hummed, sitting on the carpet in front of her, Newton plodding over to sit in his lap. "Open it and see."

Kate's fingers drummed on the box for a long moment, "Well where's your costume?"

Anthony sighed, "Kate, babe, I promise you're gonna like it, can you just-?" He gestured at the box.

She opened it slowly, tugging it free from the tissue paper, her brow furrowed as she tried to discern what the iridescent fabric was and-

Her eyes shot to his, a small smile tugging at her lips, "Ariel?"

He nodded, a smile coming to his lips as well as her fingers moved over the fabric, "You like it?"

She nodded, leaning down and tilting his chin up until their lips met. "I love you. It's pretty great too."

So really, Anthony was riding high, by the time he was tugged into Kate's old flat, now Edwina and Josie's, Kate's fingers threaded through the holes in his sweater, her voice in his ear You are really going to get it tonight for this I hope you know that.

Edwina looked up in Surprise as they made their way over, her costume looking like-

"Sorry, are you Laura Dern in Jurassic park?"

Edwina rolled her eyes, "Yes, Obviously, she's an icon." her eyes swept over Kate "And you're a mermaid and... someone with enough money to buy a sweater that doesn't have holes in it?"

And it would have made him roll his eyes usually, but not tonight, not with Kate happy, her warm smile pressed into the side of his neck, the sting of her engagement ring cool against his stomach. He winked at his sister in law. "Prince Eric, Hoping to catch a little mermaid in my net tonight."

Kate's lips brushed his cheek, as her sister looked distastefully at him.

"I regret catching this dick for you, get out of my sight."

And in the morning, when Kate sat on their sofa, the light streaming in through the windows, catching in her hair, his sweater from last on, he couldn't help but post a picture.

A Little Mermaid got caught in my net, and I'm never letting her go back to the sea.

And he shouldn't have been surprised when, 15 minutes later he saw the comment

TheothermissSharma: I hate to say it, Anthony because I think she's the best person in the world, but you're too in love with Kate.

[sashi-ya]

Hello Sashi, sweetheart & the most wonderful writing partner I’ve ever had! 🌹❤️🌹 I’ll try my best to give you a prompt that can inspire you, but I can’t make any promises! Hmm...how about some NSFW with Long-Haired!Law x Fem!Reader? (I have no shame admitting that I loved this one you did for Law, so it could be like a continuation/spin-off, if you wanted. If not, I’ll happily welcome anything you decide, if you decide to write this 😊) I’m sliding you this again, if it helps with the creative juices~ 👀👀😏

My dear Michelle, my favorite artist ♥! you have made me push my imagination to where I'm not sure I can come back now... Long haired! AND bottom Law?. I'm still trying to recover myself from writing the second part of "Can I call you Mommy?". And I hope you like it as much as I did creating it :3.

By the way, I love u ♥ ~

NSFW ~ Sub! Long Haired! Trafalgar Law x F! Reader ~ Can I Call You Mommy? Pt. 2

TW: Well EXPLICIT nsfw, sub! little! Law. Mommy kink. Fem dom. Humping. Usage of strap on. Anal. Rimming. Oral. Delightfully blushed Trafalgar Law.

A/N: Couldn't find the author of the fan art I used for the banner. If you know who draw such art please tell me and I'll tag them / change it in case I don't have permission.

This is the second part from the "Can I Call You Mommy" fic.

WC: 1.7K

Looking at the box in front of you, you wonder if Law would like you to use it or not with him. It’s been some weeks since Law accepted having a mommy kink. After the first time, he refused several times being into that, saying it was just “a moment”, but both of you knew he was way more into it…

Since then, he tried hard into acting like a dominant man, but failed miserably at each time you -unconsciously- whine “fuck your mommy” while you were having sex. All in all, Law ended up confessing this was one of his top kinks once he couldn’t fight it against it anymore. (And you felt proud, I mean, getting the Surgeon of Death into confessing and accepting a feeling is something not a lot of people manage to achieve).

The box holds black leather straps, a dildo, and some lube. You don’t really know how to use it, but you’ll see how it goes… You close the drawer where your “surprise for the night” is and head outside the room to resume your duties on the Submarine.

-------

Is already night, Law is resting his back over your belly, his tattooed hands on your knees. You play with his hair, “Ah Law, your hair has grown so much babe. I love it” you tell him while you brush your fingers through his shoulder length black locks. “Uhum, I think I might keep it like this. It was a good idea” he hums, while you two enjoy the Proko ~プロコ Den Den Mushi project the Shinsekai News on the wall of your room. “These bitches, I’m so tired of them” Law grunts when some government idiot appears on the screen. You giggle, you love when he gets mad.

But tonight, you should finally see if your boyfriend likes or not the little “surprise”. And what’s the best way to do it? Well… turning him on. You were already braiding his hair, and thought it was a good idea to pull from it. “Auch!” says Law. “I’m sorry, but…I’ve been thinking about this long hair may come in handy” you tell him, whispering into his ear. “Mh… handy? Handy for what?”. And you don’t answer, but instead pull rougher from it, lifting Law’s chin up.

“Well, handy because like this mommy can ride you better”

Law subtly smirks, but you notice him still confused. “Mommy… what do you mean with “riding”?” he asks, all shy and acting innocent. “Well… you see… mommy bought you a surprise”. Law turns around all so excited. It is so weird to see him acting like this, Law is usually so grumpy. “Uhum. But… first you will have to earn mommy’s surprise” you tease him, while one of your fingers traces sexily the ink lines on his chest.

“Then I will work for it, mommy” Law says, fully smiling sexily at you. “You know exactly what mommy likes, don’t you?” you ask, already enjoying Law’s kisses on your belly going down. Raven strands of hair fall on his face and tickles your stomach, he looks so handsome like this. His grey eyes fixed on yours, making the most beautiful contrast with the caramel skin. Law is far from everything beautiful; Law is a God of perfection. And Law is all yours ~.

His face rests in between your legs, he bites and kisses your inner thighs. His fingers play on the entrance of your core, it goes up and down. “Mommy, can I eat you?” he asks, already drooling, eager to taste your honeys. “Of course, baby. Come on, remember you should earn your surprise”. And there he goes, devouring your whole self, desperately and delightfully indulging on your taste. And it feels so good, you press your sex against his perfect face, your fingers tangled in his long hair.

You see him humping with a hand in between his legs, so needy, so turned on to this. “Baby, use this” you tell him, handing him a pillow. “Put this in between your legs, come on”. He accepts right away, straddling his hips over the pillow. You notice how hard, and how wet he has become. His pants are all precum stained from the arousal.

Once he is correctly placed over the pillow, Law moans muzzled against your core. And you moan too; you whine, “make mommy cum, come on”. Your boyfriend humps on the pillow and fingers you, sucking your clit at the same time. Climax hits you, and you don’t even know if it was by Law’s amazing oral skills, by how needy he looks while grazing himself against the pillow, or both. While the last waves of orgasmic feelings make you squirm, Law also cums. No hands, just frotting. He pants, cheeks so red, ears too.

“Oh, you came too? Good boy, you are a really good, good boy” you tell, while helping him crawl over you. He rests his head over your chest, mouth already looking for your breasts. “Let’s take those pants off, first. Look at the mess you did”. You push him softly off you, he lays on bed looking at you all embarrassed while you take off his cum stained pajama and quickly wiped his groin with the sheets.

“M- mommy, can I have my surprise now?” he asks, so shyly. “Well, I think it’s the perfect time to” you tell him, smirking. “Wait for mommy here, I’m gonna bring it”.

And there you are, using the leathery strap around your hips, well secured around your inner thighs. The phallic instrument that hangs from it looks intimidating to you, and so you think it looks to Law… but you are wrong, he is not intimidated at all, Law wants it, Law is so needy for it. He bites his lip, smirking at you so sexy but still acting like the little sub he is.

“Do you like Mommy’s present?” you ask, probably with trembling lips. As much as you enjoy being his dom, boy this looks scary. “I really, really do Mommy” he says, so happy and instantly blushes. Law still gets embarrassed because of his outbursts of submissive acts. “I’m so glad you do, baby. I also bought this, so it doesn’t hurt” you tell him, showing the little bottle of lube on one of your hands. “Thank you, mommy ~”. “You are welcome, darling. Lay on your back for me” you command, trying to suppress your burning cheeks. The mix in between arousal, shame, and anxiety it brings you the idea of literally fucking Trafalgar Law is making you a little dizzy.

Law waits for you with his knees pressed together, completely naked on bed. You kneel in front of him, spreading his legs so softly and then jerking his already hard and throbbing member. He moans a little and takes his head back. You open the lid of the little lube bottle and drizzle the liquid over his crotch. Drops fall from each side of the base of his dick to his perineum. The feeling makes him shiver and squirm.

Your tongue attacks the tip of his dick first, his shaft, the groin, the balls and finally his rear entrance. Rimming him, delightfully mixing the plain taste of the lube with remains of salty precum on your tongue. He spreads his legs even more, when you decide it’s time for you to stick the first finger inside. “There you go, good boy” you encourage him, he squirms constantly.

Your index, start to feel how it isn’t tight anymore, so you add a second finger. And then, a third. Law is so relaxed and needy to be penetrated, he is ready in no time for you to pound in him. And you do, drizzling the whole dildo with lube you align it with his entrance. “Tell me if you need me to stop, ok?” you tell him, but frankly you are not sure if he listened to you. Law is already in a trance, and he only wants release.

Inside you go, he whines, and you crawl over him, putting your arms on each side of his chest. Deep, you are so deep inside. Law’s eyes closed, long black locks spread all around the pillow, lips separated, blushed cheeks. An image that belongs to a museum, like a renaissance painting.

In and out you go, Law sometimes tries to touch himself, but you don’t let him. “No no, mommy is gonna do it for you” you tell him and jerk him off. He is about to burst, Law is so sweaty and lost in pleasure… “Mommy, I’m… I’m cumming” he says. “Not yet, baby…” you pout, this is so enjoyable…

“Turn around, on all fours for mommy” you command. He whines and does so. No waiting, you are inside him once again, this time is easier, one of your knees on the mattress the other leg next to him, bending your knee in a 90° angle. You can move easier, your hips thrusting him. Law himself moving towards you, he wants you deep, deep inside. “Harder mommy, faster faster” he begs.

“Of course, baby” you say and slide your hand all over his tattooed muscled back. You reach his nape and tangle your hand around his long hair. “Told you your hair comes in handy so Mommy can fuck you better” you say and pull from it. His head thrown back gives you the perfect grip to fuck him mercilessly, faster, violently. “M… mommy…” he mumbles in between panting. “Come for mommy, come on baby” you tell him, deeply pounding into his ass.

Law’s belly spasms, his back arch and he comes with a delightful whine.

“Mommy…”.

Warm seed spilling from his insides, relieving the pressure built on his lower stomach. Law reaches climax so good, so intensely. His face looks red, messed up, the roots of his hair completely wet by the sweat. The room smells of sex, of his skin scent, of a man completely surrounded to the most carnal pleasures.

Your boyfriend falls to the side, still panting. He looks at you, those grey eyes, wet from the pleasure. “Did you like it?” you ask, intoxicated with the experience. “I did, I did mommy… thank you, I love you…” he mumbles, and his lids close slowly. Law is exhausted, his energy left his body with the last orgasm.

“I love you too, baby…” ♥ ~

[punkscowardschampions]

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: How'd I do? Your nan gonna give me another slap or shout me a drink next I see her? 😂 Janis: Well, I personally reckon you did alright but she's a harder woman to please Janis: I think you're outta the attack on sight group though so 👍 not bad for a night's work, lad Janis: How are you faring, I lost you in the crowd at several points so I'm dreading thinking who said what tbh Jimmy: 💪🏆😎🍻 Jimmy: Glad I had my bad boy shades, don't think I've been snapped so much in my life Jimmy: And at one point we basically had paps being so #goals Jimmy: but the insults were too slurred and 🇮🇪 to pack as much punch as you or your nan like Janis: mmblockoutthehaters Janis: not a fan of being the other side of the lens then, no? 😜 now you see my struggle, in all the ways 🙄 Janis: Yeah, they were on fine form, like Janis: Not Grace though, don't you think? Something's up and its not just date envy Jimmy: shut up you're sooooooooooo about being my muse Jimmy: yeah it was a good night all round, cheers Jimmy: it'll be drama with the flat whites or fuck boy. Lot of dumping done, wasn't it? Jimmy: Mia alone is a lot to get out of your mind 🎻 Janis: Suuuuure 😏 well, all the extra exercise with Twix is no doubt benefitting my grade in Sports so Janis: Owe ya one, don't I? Janis: Though reckon you just settlin' cos my actual model sister would charge you a fee, like Janis: More fucking fool me, ay? 😕😉 Janis: 👍 not too bruised? Janis: not just chattin' 'bout ya ego Janis: Probably right, yeah, it'll be Mia...I don't think she was that arsed about Harry, though she acted it Jimmy: I'd have to get in line, Twix'd never let me have first dibs collecting that debt Jimmy: I don't know what's more of a headwrecker that your sister is a proper model or that she's the only one #geneticsgamestronginyourgaff Jimmy: Still angling to get a pair of kicks off me? Take it up with 🎅 I did my bit on the 🎁 front 🤞 Jimmy: You better not be chatting that 😎 selectively remembering only your wins again, are you? Jimmy: Bet she's devo about Tammy #relatable 😂 Jimmy: what a giant hole in our lives Janis: She's 🥇 Janis: No matter what hype you're on Janis: True we're #blessed but don't let me catch you commenting on it again, IRL or on the 'gram Janis: I'll have to become that bitch and I don't think I've got the time tbh Janis: 🤐 nope, no complaints here, for the big man or yourself, like Janis: Hmm? I suddenly can't recall, maybe 'cos that useless bint next to us practically brained me when her club flew away from her Janis: Looks like you'll have to schedule a rematch if you wanna be covered in glory 🤷 Janis: Poor Lurch...who's the real loser here? Being such with bulllyimia Jimmy: Done and done Jimmy: Can't win 'em all...oh Tammy I thought we had something proper special babe Jimmy: what you doing today? Ready to take on the challenge any time you wanna lay it down Janis: So did she! But you will insist on bouncin' onto the next one, like 😉 Janis: make up your mind, Jimothy Janis: I'm wallowing in my pit currently...avoiding any fad diets and weird exercise regimes being implemented and spring cleaning and yet more leftovers curry Janis: 🤢 Jimmy: 😎💪 Jimmy: I envy that Jimmy: any suggestions for a film that me, Bobbin and Cass can sit through? I'm drawing a blank on an animated musical with violent themes rn like Janis: You wouldn't if you could smell me Janis: Sexayyy Janis: Hmm Janis: There's that one where all the dinosaurs die at the end? Right, they probably throw out the odd tune too Janis: I'd say Lion King fits the spec actually but don't wanna start their year off with a heaping dose of trauma Jimmy: With you there Jimmy: Fuck it I'm sticking Mulan on and shutting their gobs with sweets Janis: That'll do it 👍 no one gives a shit if the bad guy gets it in the neck Janis: especially not from a sassy lady #feminism101withgracieguru Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: she was really cracking out the nye vids #content Jimmy: silver lining of the 💔 a good GRWT Janis: Gotta show 'em what they're missing, or whatever Janis: Think Mia had a party at hers, purely so Grace couldn't come Janis: hostess with the mostest she ain't Janis: Devvo there wasn't another shit party for us to ruin tho, obvs Jimmy: school is still days away we've got time Janis: don't tempt fate, mate Janis: you've not got the 🍀 Janis: don't think my bro or the garda can handle it Janis: fuck knows where he is, still a no-show Janis: s'my job, like Jimmy: Maybe he's with my MIA pops Jimmy: weird one that'd be Jimmy: I did think he might have a new missus, but that's going a bit far like Janis: Both in the drunk tank, for their sins Janis: Maybe, Christmas wishes and all that Janis: Could find the time to give you a bell still Jimmy: 🎻 Jimmy: Wanna come over and walk the 🐶 ? Cass and Bobby'll be as 🤢 as I imagine you are polishing off this lot Jimmy: Can't count it as weird fad often as we're out Janis: Alright, save 'em from themselves Janis: and you from losing your mind 😵 Janis: not long 'til school now, save your wishes for that like the other single mums Jimmy: Done. Jimmy: Bring Gracie if you can find her, she'll have no secrets after 10 mins with them two Janis: I have the distinct impression she's avoiding me, which is weird, 'cos pretty sure I've said worse and been forgiven quicker, like... Janis: but maybe if I tell her her fave barista boy is there she'll come out to play? Janis: we've got a load of leftover sparklers, I'll bring 'em, so make sure they've got their gloves on Jimmy: 😮 maybe its her ny resolution Jimmy: 💪😎 guaranteed Jimmy: They'll be your besties then at least Janis: Yeah, guess she's sticking to all her promises this time, she's done with me forreal, at least 'til midway through the month, like Janis: 🎻 Janis: I'll bell her but no promises you'll get your fave twin Janis: who doesn't love shiny things? bet there's some bones for Twix too, what a 🏆 I am Janis: if there was any doubt left in your mind Jimmy: 😍 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Oh, looks like she's at the gym Janis: thanks insta Janis: I'll leave it then Jimmy: Yeah, can't promise a decent work out, hyped as Twix is Jimmy: make do with you then, won't I Janis: Looks like it, pal Janis: Unlucky Jimmy: I'm well gutted, mate Janis: Better take it up with someone who gives a fuck 😜 Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: the dog is enraptured, thanks for the tip Janis: Stop yapping and get to moving then! Janis: I've gotta shower, its that serious Janis: let me live, boy, ugh Jimmy: [Sends a pic of him being kissed to death by Twix] Jimmy: you ain't that special, mate Janis: Ouch Janis: 🔪💔 Janis: double betrayal Jimmy: #hookedherwithmysobstory Jimmy: you did yourself over with the good advice Janis: always the way Janis: too smart for me own good Janis: i'll get back on the shelf, like Jimmy: speaking of should we take the oldies dog for them? I'd naturally be buzzing to see your nan again Janis: see, knew you loved it really Janis: worse than my sister Janis: but it is a point Janis: probably chewing through the walls as we speak Jimmy: #relatable Cass is much the same Jimmy: I better start penning my pops a note, more pages for him to have to read the better 😜 Jimmy: might stop at 5 sides if he bothers to reply to my texts like Janis: wondered what bit you was referring to there...like surely she's not wasting her time with boys already?! but gotcha Janis: phew Janis: that'd be a whole saga to try and put on a post-it Jimmy: Dad would love that, two of us out from under his feet Jimmy: Marry Bobs off if he could 😂 Jimmy: but nah she's only 😍 for Twix same as you Janis: its a real shame the gov ain't on his side for that one Janis: the travellers do it, and they all turn out FINE, geez Janis: think your Da would be obligated to at least provide you all with your own caravan though Janis: no escaping fatherhood, eh? Jimmy: 👍 stuff of dreams there Jimmy: I am about a decent caravan though Jimmy: same goes for the others, always asking me when we going back Skerries Jimmy: steady on kids that shit's still #raw Janis: Awks..that's a holiday romance for you, lads, gotta make it a one-way ticket, no returns 😂 Janis: Maybe by Easter hols you'll be able to show your face 'round there again Janis: Weather would be better too Jimmy: Funny Jimmy: But yeah #fullofgoodideasyou Janis: full of something, has been said 😎 Janis: gotta gee myself up to see that bath again 'neway, been strictly cold showers since, like 😉 Jimmy: 😏 new year, new you though so Jimmy: #yougotthis Janis: can't say 'make more of a prick of yaself in 2039' was high on my resolution list, soz about it Janis: know how much you enjoy it 🙈 Jimmy: Damn Jimmy: I was down for the challenge if you were 😜 Janis: 😳 Janis: always a fool for you, boo Jimmy: 💕 cute Janis: 🖕 do it all for the 'gram Janis: still hate u Jimmy: 💋 Jimmy: same mate, same Janis: i feel it Janis: how long can we keep this charade going, like? 🤔 Jimmy: Gotta stretch it out 'til v-day naturally Jimmy: in it for the 🎁 Jimmy: in that spirit you want me to pick you up or you gonna walk to ours when you're ready? Janis: or the next, steak and blowjob day Janis: I see you boy Janis: that said, if we eating steak and all the love-heart shaped confectionery, I better walk it 💪 Janis: this is clearly why people always get fat when they're loved up Janis: not saying weigh your Dad for proof when he finally arrives but Janis was timed out 18 hours ago Jimmy: not saying we've got one realistically Jimmy: How good's your guestimation skills? Could feel another 🏆 coming on Janis: FUCCCCCCCCCCCK Jimmy: ???? Jimmy: you okay mate?