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#i'll fix them in the morning
bloodychazorite · 5 months
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Q!SLIME HEADCANONS N’ SHORT STORIES!!
(These are all the headcanons I use in my current fic and will probably use for my future fics, in case you’re curious!! :))
So, first, I don’t think Charlie is any bit human at all. I think he’s full, pure-bred slime with a Core that gives him sentience. The Core is a heart shaped, made of enchanted ruby and plated in gold around the edges. 
During the time he was a God in the SCU (Slimecicle Cinematic Universe) he had three (That’s an incredibly long story that I may actually write one day so this is all you get for now). Now, he’s been reincarnated with one, sentient ever since. However, he’s full slime, nothing human about him. Without the Core, he’d just be straight slime. He’s probably one of the—if not just the only—sentient Slimes there is.
His skin scars because when he’s hurt enough, he needs to get more slime to repair himself. The slime isn’t his, however, so it doesn’t match his body completely for a while while it blends together.
Another type of scarring that can happen to him would be dehydration cracks. If he loses enough water, his slime will crack in a lightning-strike type pattern. It takes a while for those to go away as well, just because they need time to fill in.
Yes, he has bones, but he doesn’t need them. He has them because they make it so that he can keep his shape. When he was Gegg, he’d keep some but give the rest to Quackity for safe keeping.
 
“Where’s my left arm?” Charlie asked, digging through the bag Quackity kept on him.
The other only shuffled his foot back and forth, mumbling gently. He bit his lip as he spoke. “I needed food, man.”
“So?”
“So all I had was seeds and currently unused bones.”
A beat of silence, before a slow, creaking head turn. 
“You used my bones for bone meal.” His voice was flat and his lips were pinched. “Are you deadass?”
“Just kill another skeleton man! I needed food!”
Charlie threw up the melty stub where his left arm should’ve been, waving it back and forth and dripping goo all over the ground.
“Do you know how fucking hard it is to find intact skeletons that will fit perfectly with the one that I currently have?! And that have five fingers?!”
Quackity rolled his eyes, shrinking in on himself. “Uh...No..?”
Charlie smushed slime into his face and laughed at his dramatic screaming. “It is incredibly fucking hard!”
Charlie keeps bones on him most of the time, in case he breaks the ones he’s got. Sometimes they take a minute to get used to, some of them too big or too long or too small, but it happens nonetheless. It’s also the reason he takes any fall damage ever. Without the bones, he wouldn’t take any fall damage. Those bones also determine his general height. If he wanted to be taller, he could find/construct a taller skeleton and get more slime.
Slimes are naturally acidic at a certain level at all times. However, with prompting, his level of acidity will rise. Prompting can look like danger, or threats. It can also be emotional, with extreme rage or sadness, the works.
“Oh no, not today fucker!” Mariana screamed as Slime tried to step outside during another argument. His skin dripped from the agitation but Mariana couldn’t care less.
Slime attempted to brush past him, breath heavy. “I’ll be right back,” He mumbled, "I need to go.”  
He stepped to the left, Mariana doing the same. 
Then, to the right, where she followed once again.
“Move your ass, I need to go now.”
“Hell no, you will stay and we will talk this out.”
Slime shoved past her, briskly rushing for the door. Mariana, wings twitching in agitation, whipped around and grabbed his wrist.
He smelled the burning before he felt it.
Before the white, lava hot seer hit his senses.
She nearly cried out in pain, staggering backward and scraping her skin against the hardwood as she fell. Scrambling into the wall, she groaned in agony and grasped the wrist of the suffering palm.
“Fuck- oh, fuck!” 
Slime was right in front of him, suddenly, knelt with fear in his eyes. “Fuck, I am so sorry, I can’t control it I swear, I would never do that shit on purpose—” He rambled as Mariana writhed, swearing in shock and pain.
Her vision swam as she sobbed. 
“I swear, I-I can’t… control it.”
He’s burnt a few holes in the floors before.
All in his slime, there are acid glands everywhere. 
Because he’s got acid literally built into his system, the bones he’s got tend to break down after a while. Depending on how emotional or just how much he purposely activates his acid secretion, they could last from anywhere around two weeks to a month, usually. That’s what the skeleton in his basement is for, an extra set of bones. 
Slime’s are the closest things to aquatic creatures without actually being aquatic. Being naturally drawn and attracted to moist environments, he can’t breathe underwater, but he doesn’t actually need to breathe so I guess it doesn’t matter. When swimming, he creates fins to help. The only reason he drowns is because he takes in too much water and becomes so liquidy that he just… dies, I dunno LMAOO
Being generally docile creatures, living either underground or in swamps, most Slimes have shit eyesight. They mostly rely on vibrations in the ground and auditory sensory input. Great hearing, terrible sight. Slimes are also ambush predators! They’re slow, but they’ll eat anything. If looking for meat, they’ll hide under the soil and wait for the vibrations of something with four legs. 
“And where’s Charlie? I wanted to talk to him.” Phil asked as he stepped outside. “He said he’d be here.”
Roier, Cellbit, and himself had all been in Mariana’s house for a while now—Phil being there under the assumption that Charlie would be there. 
Mariana shrugged and glanced around. “Ehh, somewhere.”
Then Juanaflippa sprinted forward and stopped on the open ground, jumping up and down. Her tiny feet pattered the ground as she skipped in circles around the open area. Bobby tilted his head in response before Richas yanked him towards the 
Phil looked to Mariana for a look of mild amusement to say it was normal, or a look of confusion to make him feel like he wasn’t going insane because—even for Flippa—this wasn’t exactly typical from his perspective.
To Phil’s surprise, however, he stepped a bit forward and began to rhythmically tap his heel against the soil. 
“Fuck-!” His heart found itself in his feet as something squeezed tight around his ankle, holding firm as he jumped away. He grabbed for a weapon as a light green hand pulled further from the ground.
A wrist, an arm, a… a goo monster.
A goo monster holding a suspiciously familiar pair of glasses.
“...Charlie?!”
His body tied itself back together, becoming more and more recognizable. They stared at each other for a minute.
“I swear I was aiming for Roier.”
Charlie, because of the core, has much better morphing and shape shifting abilities than normal Slimes. With enough observation he could literally be anyone. He’d looked at Juanaflippa so much that his Gegg looked a bit like her. The people he spends a lot of time looking at are the people he can most easily imitate.
“So you can just look… however you want?” Fit asked 
“Uh-huh.” Slime replied offhandedly, focusing on the little craft they were working on for Richas’s half birthday.
Neither of them had ever heard of a half birthday before then.
“Without effort? You don’t even have to like… try?” 
Sue him, Fit was incredibly curious. Sentient Slimes just didn’t exist, Slime was the only one he knew and would probably ever know.
He became even more curious (and slightly defensive) as Slime began to stare at him, an expression of scrutiny behind his gaze.
Then, a familiar lopsided grin and covered his face for a minute. A sloppy squishing sound resounded from behind his hands that made Fit wince.
The taller gasped as Slime’s face became uncovered.
Fit’s own face stared back at him, with only a few uncanny details astray.
“Christ, Slime! You just keep that ability all to yourself? Do you know how much trouble you could cause with that?!” He all but yelled.
Slime laughed, shifting his face back to its normal appearance. He winked before turning his head back to the project.
“Who’s to say I haven’t caused any trouble?”
Fit—from that day on—lived in fear of the people the Slime could be.
Charlie is all types of temperature sensitive. It's crazy.
Too hot, he’ll get all melty and struggle to hold his form. Leave his bones behind him and become a puddle.
 Too dry, he’ll dehydrate and crack up. It’s incredibly painful, which is why slimes tend to stick around damp, humid areas.
 Too cold, he’ll freeze, becoming a literal Slimecicle. Just like hypothermia, his fingertips, toes, and nose will turn a shade of blue first, eventually infecting the rest of his body. Also hella painful.
A good tactic if you really wanted to torture a Slime, stick them in the cold. They wouldn’t be able to stretch or morph after a while, it'll hurt like hell, and you get to decide how bad it is. GOOD STUFF
A 60 to humid 70 degrees Fahrenheit is generally ideal. The island tends to run a bit higher than that, but it’s not too extreme of a shift so he’s generally okay with some extra water.
Haha, he picked Eggxile in a place that was out of his comfort zone, just cause he knew he didn’t deserve comfort. He sent himself to a place that was too hot and too dry for a Slime. That's fun.
Uhh, that’s really all I can think of for right now, but I’ll repost this anytime I add to it :DD If you’ve got any headcanons you wanna talk about or you wanna talk about mine, please do!! I’ll literally talk for hours, you have no idea
LOVE YOU BYEE <33
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buglaur-cc · 3 months
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🫴🏻 6/12 pelican town romanceables for download
they only have an everyday outfit
traits and aspirations randomised
do whatever you want with them, tag me if you post about them if you want to :)
thanks to cc creators <3
download simfileshare
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artykrisofficial · 4 months
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Been a moment since I drew Dead plate stuff (that I finished anyway...) I LOVE THEM SO MUCH school has me double dogged up rn tho take that as you will.
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lacecap · 3 months
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something about this seems familiar to you
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moonpaw · 7 months
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did manga editing for 16 hours today
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pray for me please
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mitchell-nihil · 6 months
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Kiora, maybe Lyra...
what should her name be?
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iobartach · 26 days
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okay! this has been a LONG time coming, so brace yourselves for this... we're gonna talk about that injection scene from ats.v so comic purists especially please don't hunt down my ass for what i'm about to put out into the universe 😂
....so ..... let's talk about ... atsv's injection scene ;
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what was intended by it? fuck knows, waiting for sony to send answers on a postcard. buuuut, for my take, let me be clear on the interpretations / meanings that i'm not gonna perpetuate ;
it's not rapture. i'm drawing a HARD STOP under that thought. noooo thankkk you.
it's not the source of his spider powers. we're staying true to our Cronenberg-inspired metamorphosis horrific-ness here 😎 even if more... recent reinventions of miguel shown in the comics would tell you he willingly opted to make himself half-spider, i ain't subscribing to it. (miguel's perspective on his transformation probs deserves its own hc post eventually! stay tuned!
so... if not this... what then? well...
i'm gonna posit that the injection(s) are a way for miguel to manage his 'condition'
for that, lemme do a little recap / reminder;
following his accident, miguel has experienced a multitude of changes. one of the most prominent changes is that he's become an obligate carnivore / hypercarnivore if you will. which means, meat is his new bff - he'll crave the calories, he'll eat it cooked or even raw, especially if it placates his tendency to gnaw when starving. and when he does eat, he tears and swallows chunks - not really a chewer any longer.
whiiiich introduces a new issue; anything plant based? loses its appeal to him. it's a slow progression, too. he'd start with reducing portions. taking a bite or two. leaving the rest. until there's next to no greenery left on the plate, when he knows he needs the nutrients they provide.
and ooh, it's actually gets a level worse than that : )
not only does he stop eating vegetables, fruits, *maybe* fungai? idk? but wellll his own mutated body might even stop producing the important stuff like vitamin c, and things of that ilk ! so ... what's a hybrid to do? how's he gonna make up the difference and get the nutrients he needs? ( especially when you consider... whilst he doesn't eat often, due to a combination of altered metabolism and slowed digestion rate, he could eat and consume calories in the magnitude that could make a damn saiyan blush --)
but, even so, it won't make up for the deficiencies 😔 so what's a spooky spider lad to do?
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Come up with a solution, duh!
Yesss, baby, we're talking supplementation! operating in a similar manner to a diabetic needing insulin, or someone with B12 deficiency, for the all important food stuffs that miguel has perhaps tried, and tried again to consume, he's gonna turn to science for a lending hand, load up on what's either missing from his diet now, or that which his body simply can't absorb any longer
And, in addition to this, these shots are important in another sense 👀
they help miguel to manage his spider tendencies
since the way i've approached this with my earlier hcs is, well, tl;dr my mig's human / spider dna isn't a 50/50 split, it's gradually veering more towards spider as the years pass
this means that, it's a bit of a perfect storm brewing; lack of nutrients + behaviours & tendencies that he is likely chronicling by the day is ... a recipe for trouble! i can bet that miguel by himself can ... manage / hold himself together ... to a point, but, to paraphrase a friendo; have you ever met a hangry person? there's a limit to everything!
and we've seen miguel breach that limit already, during the miles chase in atsv. if ya had a bingo card for just about the worst everything happening in a single day? that card probably got filled UP during that chase! 😔 perhaps stress also played as factor there was well - the dude's carrying a LOT on his shoulders!
anyyyway! back on topic! let's expand the supplementation too - let's also throw in some sort of hormones? i know this is a whole science in itself, and ain't scientist 🥹 so i'll leave this a bit more broad, and say that they also play a part in stabilising miguel, ground him, so he won't go chasing a kid across the city... .ahem 😔
leading on from this, though, i wanna add some last things here. i know, i'm... meandering here , but lemme say;
take note of the intensity of miguel's eye colouration!
r e d - sorry, but you're shocked, buddy, best of luck surviving 💀
scarlet / bright red - feeling aggro, but holding enough of himself together to not act on his impulses
garnet - the default, feeling spidery, but also feeling human as close to a harmonious state as he can manage for the most part
dark brown - the goal!👀this is potentially a state that achieved after he injects himself. it floods him with a calm like nothing else he's ever felt. it's when he feels the most human again, a memory that's easily forgotten when you've got fangs and shoot webs from the back of your hands!!!
and it's with this last point, with the brown eyes, that i wanna bring this home with the little ritual miguel develops; after takin an injection, he'll make a point of brewing the strongest cup of black coffee that he can manage. a rare treat these days for him... especially given that caffeine does not agree with spiders. 💀
so yeah!!! thanks for reading through this ! 👋
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good morning!! <33
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youremyonlyhope · 5 months
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why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up
#i'm overthinking something that i did and was told off for doing by my director#and on my way home i was thinking when was the last time i was even talked to like that during a production#and then i remembered the costume experience from hell of only a couple months ago that i've already began blocking out#but the thing is that that person was someone i knew i'd never have to work with again#i mean at first i thought i would have to work with them more. then they announced they were moving away immediately#so i only had to deal with them face to face for another weekish after that point and anytime they yelled at me#i was like 'cool. i'll do exactly what you say to do. and nothing more.' but then of course me being me#i did some extra stuff and they initially were like 'oh that's pretty' and then days later told me to cut everything i added#and like sure i get that the show was frozen but girl. that costume was unfinished. i was trying to finish it. it was frozen but looked bad#anyway. whenever they yelled at me and had actual malice in their heart i was like whatever. i was hurt. but i didn't care as much.#but this time it's someone i've worked with many many times before and it was about a habit i have that i know isn't great#but at the same time the thing that prompted it wasn't even me doing this habit it was something else#but she interpreted it as that habit and said that i can't do that on a production she's directing#and that if i couldn't stop then i could pull out from the production and there'd be no hard feelings between us#and honestly i think her reassuring that she knows i'm valuable and that she wants me there while also telling me not to do this thing#and the fact that she's someone i like working with and will continue to work with just made it all hurt so much more#especially since she referenced another past production we've done where i didn't even realize she had noticed that i do this.#and i found myself in near tears. and still am kind of in near tears. i can't decide if i need to cry or not.#and i had NO sleep last night so i was looking forward to sleeping tonight but now i'm just overthinking EVERYTHING#and like. i know everything will be fine. if i just stop inserting myself and stick to just my specific tasks. it'll be fine.#but this is one of the ways my ocd manifests. i feel like i have to personally fix something i notice going wrong. or it'll be bad.#because every single time i choose to sit back and not be nosy when i notice something it ends up bad in a way i could have prevented#if i just inserted myself in a situation i technically wasn't part of but knew i could help or fix. so i just need to not do that.#but then i feel guilt if it does go wrong in the ways i immediately assumed it would and in a way i could prevent.#and i've been trying to work on this for like 6 months and aaaahhhh it's hard and being called out on it from her just really really hurt#i still may or may not cry. i don't know. the irony of me telling my therapist THIS MORNING that it's been a while since i last cried.#and the universe being like 'i took that as a challenge' and handing me this situation for me to spiral over.#i need to leave things alone. i need to stare straight ahead. and ignore whatever isn't specifically for me to do. but ahhh i want to help#and then of course my mom has this same habit and it annoys me when she does it yet i do it to other people and ahhhhhhhh#brain please just shut up. i need to sleep. i have to work tomorrow.
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gynandromorph · 5 months
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rewriting my cringefail first act which had many scenes that were much more like my summaries in act 2 than actually fully written scenes
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queenlucythevaliant · 2 years
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Hi! If you don't mind my asking, you support theistic evolution correct? Do you believe in a historical or metaphorical Adam and Eve? I know that theistic evolutionist Joshua Swamidass has a book called The Genealogical Adam and Eve where he distinguishes common genetic ancestors from common genealogical ancestors. I don't know if that's your sort of thing or if you agree, but I figured I'd ask you your opinion on the subject. You don't have to answer if you don't want to, though!
This is absolutely my sort of thing, though I haven't read the particular book you referenced. Thank you for giving me another opportunity to talk about origins! I was really excited when I saw this in my inbox! That said, buckle your seatbelt because this will get long lol
Quick little caveat: I don't have any formal education in anthropology and only have a little bit in human evolution. My academic focus is on microbial evolution. That said, I've certainly spent time considering questions of the historical Adam and Eve, so I'd like to think I can opine on the subject usefully :)
To no one's surprise, let me start off with a Lewis quote. This is from The Problem of Pain chapter 5:
For long centuries God perfected the animal form which was to become the vehicle of humanity and the image of Himself. He gave it hands whose thumb could be applied to each of the fingers, and jaws and teeth and throat capable of articulation, and a brain sufficiently complex to execute all the material motions whereby rational thought is incarnated. The creature may have existed for ages in this state before it became man: it may even have been clever enough to make things which a modern archaeologist would accept as proof of its humanity. But it was only an animal because all its physical and psychical processes were directed to purely material and natural ends. Then, in the fullness of time, God caused to descend upon this organism, both on its psychology and physiology, a new kind of consciousness which could say “I” and “me”, which could look upon itself as an object, which knew God, which could make judgements of truth, beauty, and goodness, and which was so far above time that it could perceive time flowing past. [...] We do not know how many of these creatures God made, nor how long they continued in the Paradisal state. But sooner or later they fell.
(I've used ellipses to condense a bit since the full passage is rather long. I think I've maintained the integrity of what Jack was saying, but please do go read the whole thing.)
I absolutely hold that an historical Adam and Eve existed. A metaphorical approach implies either (a) that man's sin nature is the result of something "timeless and eternal" in the human heart, as Karl Barth argues (sorry Kaylie-but at least I'm disagreeing with him here!), or else (b) that God created a world in which sin was already inherent in creation. Furthermore, Paul and other NT writers treat Adam and Jesus as equally real and historical; thus, I believe that I am obligated to do the same.
That said, I'm with Lewis (and many others) in the belief that humans are indeed part of God's unified creation through evolution; overwhelming scientific evidence, both genetic and paleontological, indicates that humans share a recent common ancestor with apes and, more broadly, a universal common ancestor with all other living creatures. Likewise, population genetics indicates that it would have been near impossible for a viable population of Homo sapiens to arise from a group of fewer than a thousand individuals. We actually see evidence that other humans existed contemporaneously with Adam and Eve in the Cain and Abel account - Cain has a wife, and after he kills Abel he fears that other people will kill him. (Note: If you or anyone else would like a more in depth discussion of the data in genetics, population genetics, common ancestors, etc., just shoot me an ask; I try to streamline these discussions so I don't necessarily go into the scientific minutia, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't love to if there's interest.)
Thus, I don't believe that Adam was the first modern hominid and, for reasons that I'll get into a minute, I'm likewise not convinced that he was necessarily the first Homo sapiens or even humanity's MRCA. I do believe that he was the first Homo divinus - the first individual to be endowed with the unique image of God and with a human soul. I see this in the Scriptural text when God breathes life into Adam's nostrils (Genesis 2:7), a much more intimate act then the rest of the descriptions we get in the creation account. Whether in Africa or in Mesopotamia, I think God endowed Adam and subsequently Eve with His likeness and made them representatives for all humanity - much like Christ is our representative. Denis Alexander (British biologist/theologian) calls Adam "the federal head of all humanity alive at the time," and I quite like that description.
As I've indicated, I don't believe that Adam and Eve were necessarily the common ancestors of all humanity, either genetically or genealogically; for one thing, humanity has different matrilineal and patrilineal MRCAs and they likely didn't live at even remotely the same time. As to when Adam and Eve did live, I'm honestly of two minds on the issue. For simplicity's sake, I will number the possibilities that I consider feasible (1) and (2):
(1) The simplest answer is that Adam and Eve lived in Mesopotamia sometime during the Neolithic Era. This aligns with the descriptions we get of Eden's geography and leaves us with a lot less time to account for between Adam and Abraham.
However, this view does leave us with the issue of the many, many Homo sapiens preceding Adam and Eve who presumable lived and died without souls, despite the evidence that they behaved in very human ways (made art and musical instruments, cared for the sick, were curious and inventive, etc.) This isn't impossible to square with what I laid out above - like I said, I consider it the simplest explanation for when and where Adam and Eve lived - but it doesn't sit 100% easily with me.
(2) The other possibility is that Adam and Eve were among the first Homo sapiens and that they lived in Africa between 300 and 150 kya. Old Testament scholar C. John Collins out of Covenant Theological Seminary (Reformed and generally theologically conservative) makes the case that Moses wrote Genesis 1-11 using a kind of "anachronism." It's very likely that Moses had access to pre-existing sources while writing the Pentateuch, and he may have "'reconstructed' the past, working backwards from ordinary human experience to what must have caused it, giving us a tale that provided contrast to the other stories [Mesopotamian and Egyptian creation myths]." Of this "anachronism," Collins says, "a text may well have described aspects of the older times in terms of what the writer and his audience are familiar with. This does not necessarily detract from the historicity of the text, since the text still refers to actual events."
The issue with this view is that it obviously places us in much murkier territory than option one in terms of how we view the infallibility of Scripture. I believe that we're to take the Biblical histories seriously as fact, but not literalistically (would love to do another discussion explaining in more depth what I mean by this if there's interest; again, shoot me an ask). I do believe that all Scripture is infallible. Thus, this explanation also doesn't sit easily with me, but I do lend it credence because I trust Dr. Collins's theology and exegesis in other areas.
Ultimately, I'm going to bring the issue back to the C.S. Lewis excerpt that I started on; for now, I am content to say "We do not know how many of these creatures God made, nor how long they continued in the Paradisal state. But sooner or later they fell." I do fully intend to continue exploring the issue with an inquisitive mind and a humble heart, hoping that as I grow into greater theological and scientific knowledge I might come to an understanding of the Fall that does sit well with all that I know to be true. I'm still young :)
Please do always feel free to drop by my inbox with follow-ups/any other science/faith questions. I love these issues so much that I've chosen to study them academically; it is a joy to discuss them with you!
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gayformlessblob · 1 year
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hi! so! i was very very inspired by a martim art @fox-guardian did (here's a link i love it so much) and i looked at it for too long that my brain popped out a fic idea and i did it! i made the thing and i hope it's good 👍
i would post the text here but i don't feel like figuring out how the read more thing works soz
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strangefable · 2 years
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The first set of ship in 5 minutes, for Lore and her two OTPs. <3
Lore and Max | The Outer Worlds | Ship: A Bartender and Her Vicar
Lore and Ava* | The Outer Worlds | Ship: A Doctor Walks Into A Bar**
tagging just the TOW crew for this one: @funkypoacher, @damejudyhench, @the-lastcall, @somethingclich8, @clonesupport, @gayafsatan, @jumpship90, @kourumi, @mediocre-life-span, @chilikecheese, @juniper-tree, @olivepip-writing, @toastedoats42, @kyber-infinitygems, @glass-hope, @galaxycunt, @incognito-insomniac, @porkwithbones, @the-laridian, and anyone I mistakenly missed <3
Footnotes: *Ava belongs to the marvelous @socially-awkward-skeleton <3 <3 <3 **not their actual ship title; i just think i'm funny
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theflyingfeeling · 1 year
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stupid stupid stupid stupid I am so fucking stupid
(LONG rant in the tags. originally a little longer still but apparently there were too many tags so tumblr deleted the rest lol)
#ahahahaha so i applied for a (fixed-period) job that was like. right up my alley?#and i was one of the two applicants and they invited me to a Teams interview which was supposed to be last monday#but when i heard the other applicant is someone who's been working for them for the past semester i was like 🤡#hmmmm i do wonder which one of us they'll hire!! 🙂#and i was crushed because why can't things go my way for once#being a job-seeker in this area on my field is so stressful and depressing if you don't have the right connections#so i cancelled the interview with an email on the morning of the interview#because i just couldn't motivate myself to go even for practice. i just couldn't#i did consider calling the place and asking if the sitauation was like i suspected#but i didn't because i am not a fully functional adult ✌️🤷‍♀️#well. today i noticed that they have opened the position again 🤡#which means that for one reason or another they're not going to hire the person who's been doing that exact job for them before?#and now i'm crying because lmao what kind of impression i'll be giving of myself#if i call them now and tell them why i cancelled the interview?#''yeah so i stood you up because i'm a hardened pessimist and thought i had no chance pls hire me lol''#who's gonna want to hire a loser like this 🙃 a loser who couldn't even bother calling them like a normal adult would've#and also what if my employment agency finds out i didn't go to the interview? they could cancel my allowance ahahahahahAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAA#god i hate being unemployed and i hate job seeking so much it hurts#my self-confidence is nowhere near it should be if you were actually to do well in job interviews etc.#''why do you think you'd be good for this job?'' I'M NOT! YOU'LL BE DEFINITELY BETTER OFF HIRING ANYONE ELSE!!#and some people's advice for job interviews be like ''just be yourself!'' like honey no#if i'm myself at a job interview absolutely no one's gonna want me ahaha#job-seeking is just so fucking crushing and humiliating#like. when you're studying and you have an exam? you can study for it as hard as you can and try to do your best#and you'll get the grade you deserve. if someone gets the highest grade it doesn't effect YOUR chance to get the highest grade as well#but when applying for a job? you can write a splendid application text and answer the interview questions as best as you can#but if there's another applicant that's significantly more qualified or experienced than you they WILL be hired over you#so you can try your best and IT'S STILL NOT ENOUGH#and that's why i didn't go to the job interview. because i wanted to protect myself from that heartbreak again#doing the best i can and still not getting the job
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pierswife · 10 months
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How I cope with being sick: Imagining how my blorbos would act when they're sick
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