#i'll absolutely be posting more in the near future
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is this anything
#i've been obsessed with drawing those draw the squad memes as the mh guys lately#i'll absolutely be posting more in the near future#jaylex#jay merrick#alex kralie#marble hornets#si's doodles#my art
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just a little update!! bc i feel like it
#i finished compiling the zine last night (yay)#it's technically a proof rn and we haven't sent it out to our contributors yet but!! i wanted to yell about it somewhere#i had a whole crisis exporting the pdf bc i realized the bleed border somehow didn't save into the original file#but thankfully i was able to add it in at the end and bc i had scaled the files correctly i didn't have to modify much#thanks ig i.ndesign /reluctant#was the process frustrating? yes. was it fulfilling though? absolutely. i'm so proud of everyone that participated#also i finally got the confirmation email for the conference i applied for and my supervisor emailed me her congrats w/ emojis ;u;#it's next month. terrifying. but i know at least 2 ppl speaking too so it'll be ok#i'm going first hjdfhs and then i'll show up to support them#i'm on the final part of that project and it needs to be done before i present so.. just a bit more to go#the vibes have been off lately but things are getting done over here#not saying i'm going on hiatus bc i'm still gonna be doodling to stay sane but it's a possibility in the near future#i do have ideas and things i want to post for archival purposes ofc so it will never be radio silence#oh right and i haven't done any of the new quests bc [gestures at above]#note
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ftm trans Eddie Munson gets turned into a chew toy for hell bats and rescued in the 11th hour by his friends who don't know he's trans, who have to run some triage first aid and can hardly make sense of the blood and gore that used to be his body as they cut off his shirt and pants to get access to the worst of the wounds, who definitely aren't in their right minds well enough anyway to think of anything other than stopping the bleeding and getting him to a hospital, which they do, and miraculously Eddie finds himself blinking awake in a bright, fluorescent room feeling exactly like he imagines a chew toy for hell bats would feel in the aftermath which is to say: like shit. Even more miraculously, he finds hometown hero Steve Harrington posted up at his bedside with greasy hair (!!! Eddie never thought he'd see the day) and bags under his eyes.
The overwhelming relief on Steve's face when he sees Eddie is awake is touching, the misty eyes and cracking voice when he says god, i thought you were toast, man are downright flattering and, let's face it, giving Eddie all the wrong ideas that he figures he has an I-almost-died pass for at the moment so he rocks with it, let's himself indulge in the fantasy for a moment. Then, gradually, Steve's relief becomes more and more obviously some brand of deeply felt pity (or sympathy, but Eddie's never been good at distinguishing the two), which bursts his bubble enough to call him out.
"I know I look like what comes out the business end of a meat grinder, but I swear I'm good, dude. They definitely have me on the good shit, I hardly feel it. I'll be good as new in no time." Big fat fucking lie, by the way, but he'll say whatever if it gets that wounded puppy look out of Harrington's eyes.
"I...yeah, Eddie, I'm glad." And whatever it is he doesn't want to say, whatever is putting that you poor motherfucker look on his face, he's absolutely the opposite of subtle about it.
Eddie can hear the manifestation of his panic on the heart monitor.
"What? What is it? Is everyone- is Dustin-?" He can't say it, can't even think it, would rather be slowly torn to shreds all over again than know he failed at his one fucking task to keep the kid safe.
"No! I mean, yes, he's fine, they're all fine. Henderson's got a broken ankle and both of Max's arms are broken but the docs say they'll be fine in a few months with physical therapy."
The release of tension in Eddie's body hurts almost as much as the relief soothes him. "Okay then, what the fuck are you not telling me? It's fine, I'm a big boy, Harrington, I can take it."
He sighs, looking sick with it. "Eds...I don't know how to tell you this."
Oh god, what the fuck. Eddie's right back to freaking out because Steve looks inexplicably guilty, pained in the face like he's about to deliver the worst news he could imagine but if everyone's fine then-
"It's your dick, man. It's- it's gone. The bats-"
And Eddie laughs so hard he tears about a dozen stitches, immediately stops laughing, and throws up over the side of the bed and thankfully not all over his freshly reopened wounds as Steve shouts for help.
Eventually, when he's all stitched up again and barely hanging on to his hard earned lesson to not literally bust his gut laughing about the look on Steve's face (he has to force himself not to tell Wayne the specifics of how he ended up back in the OR, because he's absolutely gonna crack up and Eddie will definitely be unable to help himself from laughing with him), he realizes he's going to come out to all his friends in the very near future because holy shit, he has to tell everyone about Steve's utterly devastated expression at the news of Eddie's Ken doll-ification by way of demobat.
#I've been laughing about this in my head for WEEKS#the idea that steve feels so bad eddie got his dick eaten by demobats that he literally can't hide it and tells him immediately kills me#as always please read into the gay subtext here bc yes eddie also tells this story at their wedding many years down the line#eddie munson#steve harrington#steddie
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Radio Chatter
NSFW BELOW THE CUT!
Knightverse Bumblebee/Human Reader, AFAB!Reader, GN Pronouns, First Time, Fluffy Smut, lots of sweet radio communication from Bee
Welcome to the first of my sporadic Kinktober Transformers fics I'll be posting over the upcoming month. If I run out of ideas I may take requests in the future, but for now I'm pretty well-stocked on concepts.
"Nngh…"
"Zrrrnn…?"
"I'm okay, I just… Need a minute to adjust."
"I'll be careful! -KZZSH- Take your time to get it!~"
Even sprawled out beneath his massive frame, spread achingly, impossibly wide by his spike, Bumblebee still found a way to make you laugh. Up until recently he had tried (and failed) to think very little about potentially interfacing with you. Mainly because he wasn't even sure if his "equipment", for lack of a better word, was compatible enough with you to really attempt anything. But the way his thick digits were finally able to caress your bare skin with a reverence he'd craved for far too long? It was currently making him wish he'd asked for this cycles ago.
Warm metal fingertips traced featherlight along the jut of your collarbone and further down, mapping the rises and curves of muscles and bone in your body with a curious admiration. Bee's antennae flicked and fluttered with each new discovery, each dip and scar and freckle. But as he ran a hand down each of your sides, fingertips trailing over your soft squishy spots above your hips, you couldn't fully stifle your laughter.
His optics widened, digits scribbling back up and along your soft sides in the same area that had pulled that adorable little sound from your lips. You squeaked again, wriggling slightly beneath him as his servos squished into your plush skin.
"Bee! Hahahawahahait! I'm ticklish!"
Ticklish. Of course, he himself was pretty sensitive around the transformation seams of his armor. But you didn't have any seams along your sides here, just soft, squishy warmth. Could humans be ticklish anywhere? He continued his poking and prodding, not enough to have you squealing like you were before, but enough for you to whine and wiggle beneath his grasp, powerless to escape him. Your chest heaved, whimpers and giggles you couldn't fully stifle eking past your smile even as you pawed weakly at his exploring digits.
"Plush, comfortable, and oh-so-soft! -KSSZH!- Can't take my eyes off of you… -KZZT!- Beautiful, just beautiful."
"Oh, Bee." Bringing your hands up to cup his helm, you pressed a languid kiss to the front of his mouthpiece. His antenna fluttered as he let out a pleased churr that rumbled through his entire frame. Even after you pulled away from the kiss he nuzzled further into you, tucking his faceplate as far into the crook of your neck as he could, absolutely thrumming with affection. Absent-mindedly Bee wished that humans could read EM fields as easily as Cybertronians did. Then you would be able to feel the palpable desire he had for you as more than just a static charge that put your hair standing on end. But he would have to settle with his frame and whatever words his love-addled processor could scrape up from the local airwaves instead. Not that you really seemed to mind either way.
He trailed his digits down your sides once more, fondling that particularly soft area right above your hips with just a touch more intensity. Your giggle sounded closer to a stifled moan this time as you squeezed around his spike, one hand cupping the back of his neck and toying with the cables at the base of his helm.
"Feels -ZZT- …good?"
You nodded frantically, gasping against his neck cabling as he shifted so, so slowly, spike dragging along your burning hot inner walls before pressing carefully back in. He had to be careful, the last thing he wanted was to risk hurting you. But still, your little fingernails scraping at his paint job and your wet, shuddering gasps made it near-impossible to keep any composure.
"Good, it's good. You're just so big."
He let out an all-too-pleased sounding chirp, antennae fluttering in amusement.
"Don't let that go to your head, I swear Bee." You tried to give him a disapproving look, but you just couldn't keep the smile off your face. So he nuzzled his faceplate further into you, staring up at you with big, hopeful, baby-blue optics.
"I'll make love to you, like you want me to…~"
That got you. You let out a strangled guffaw of laughter, cupping your hands over your mouth as you burst into giggles. He tittered with mechanical laughter as well: small, amused buzzes that you could feel down into the tips of your toes.
"You dork." You gave him another kiss, this one pressed to the side of his helm. "Mmh, you're lucky you're cute."
He gave a questioning buzz. "Just -ZZT- cute?"
"Alright! And strong."
"Zrrrrr?" He made a vague, teasing vocalization with an upwards tick at the ends that only made you want to laugh more.
"And brave, and fast… and sexy?"
"Bingo, sweetheart! -KSSH- Right on the money!"
You held in your laughter this time, but the goofy, amused smile you had on your face made him feel like you were reaching both hands past his chest plating and cupping his spark directly in your palms. A near-overwhelming flood of affection surged through him as he curled his frame over your small, soft body, thrusting into your perfect heat. The punched-out moan you let out only spurred him further, both servos scooping you up from beneath and cradling you off the rough ground as he rocked into you.
"It must have been love…~ -ZRRT- And I can't fight this feeling anymore!~ -KZZST- I am not a smart man. But I know what love is… -ZZRT- …Am I talking too much?"
"Oh, Bee. No, no Bee. You're perfect." You cradled his face in your hands so gently, with such brimming, overwhelming care and kindness and love that Bumblebee was certain he was going to melt into a helpless pile of energon and cables and liquid metal beneath the warmth and affection in your gaze. "I love you too. I love you, Bumblebee."
He tried to vocalize, but it trilled up into a sharp, staticky wail as pleasure punched through him like a stinger shot. Frame shivering where he curled over your own, the feeling of his transfluid spilling into you seemed to be just enough to push you to your own release as well. He whined again as your nails scratched at his perfect paint. He knew you wouldn't be able to leave a mark, but Primus be damned if he didn't want them.
He kept you cradled in his grip even as his spike depressurized and you both groaned at the feeling of his fluids drooling from your aching core. You let out a startled 'Woah!' as he rolled over, placing you draped across his chassis with his hands cradled around your back to keep you close to him.
"Could've given me a heads-up." You joked.
"Heads-up." He parroted your own voice back to you, breaking into more amused buzzes at the scandalized look on your face and the teasing slap you gave to his hood.
"You're so lucky I love you."
"I love you." He parroted again, hoping the subtle expressions on his faceplate were as easy to read to you as your soft eyes and warm, dreamy smile was to him. It must have been, or you probably wouldn't have pulled him in for another kiss.
#transformers#transformers smut#valveplug#bumblebee#bumblebee x reader#bumblebee imagines#kinktober#transformers imagines#maccadam#my writing
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When do u think Natsu actually realized that he fell for Lucy and i know he treats her differently but can u give moments where it's initiated from his side?
This is going to be a long post so buckle up!
Okay, first of all: the Phantom Lord arc. Though I don't think he fell in love with her at that point of time, I think it was the events that seriously solidified his partialness to her. I'd go into detail but I can already feel a long post incoming, so I'll keep it short: Lucy telling Natsu that she loves being a Fairy Tail wizard, while crying over the fact that she didn't want to leave ↓
After just trusting her life in Natsu, jumping from an insanely high tower, with a mere belief that maybe she had heard him in the distance – I think it struck a chord with Natsu. Like, it would be normal to cry after a fall like that, but Lucy wasn't concerned about that aspect. Her head and heart was all about the guild, how she didn't want to go, and that resonates with Natsu. Natsu's entire life at that point is 1) Finding Igneel, and 2) being with/protecting the guild.
Then I'd say it's a pretty gradual build in their relationship. They go on a lot of missions, hang out together, and just in general spend a lot of time connecting. There's some Natsu-saves-Lucy, some Lucy-saves-Natsu, some hand holding (tenrou arc I won't forget about that, thank you anime team for adding that scene), and then comes the next pivotal moment. GMG arc and the dragon festival that follows.
By then I'd say Natsu and Lucy are very much in this friends-with-emotional-benefit zone: much more than friends, absolutely not yet lovers. But with Lucy's near-death experiences in her battles, Natsu has to refrain himself from getting involved each time Lucy gets beaten up - he becomes helpless, and the worry that's sowed inside of him gets watered each time Lucy still puts his faith in him, still trusts him to come out a winner. That entire section when Lucy's in the infirmary and she tells Natsu that her entire being trusts that Natsu can do anything, I think that's when Natsu falls in love.
Now wait!! He still doesn't quite understand that he loves her. But he understands that his feelings for Lucy are more tender than any other feelings he's ever had. He treasures her in a new, heavier way. She's become precious to him.
Precious. Where have we heard that... oh >:) ↓
Now the Dragon Festival was LETHAL in a trillion ways, but especially for nalu fans. The whole Future Lucy plot and the forehead touches and the Future Natsu and Future Lucy fighting in a wasteland moments and the Natsu skipping the final GMG match to save Lucy. And of course. Future Lucy dying. It's not the first time we see Natsu get so heavily affected - it happened in the tower of heaven, when Erza was ready to give her life up. But it is the first time we see Natsu see a friend die. Like, a team mate, someone who he's responsible for bringing to the guild. And after the whole GMG conundrum? Had a single more bad thing happened Lucy during the dragon festival, he’d probably turn into a demon right there and then. Dare I even say: their relationship was the strongest at this point in time.
After the GMG and the Dragon Festival, we get the Sun Village arc (I don’t like the Eclipse celestial spirit arc so I’m not counting it, same with Key of the Starry Sky arc — technically some nalu moments but not exactly building imo) and then another big one: Tartaros. Ooooh brother, THE best arc of all times, wish Mashima knew how to replicate it. But alas, he doesn’t.
The Tartaros arc isn’t exactly a pivotal moment where Natsu “falls in love” but rather an important aspect to understand his later actions. Like this guy goes through some pretty grusome stuff, learns a lot of complicated, bad things about himself, and finishes off the arc with losing Igneel — his father that he's spent ages searching for. Natsu's entire life is turned upside down, so he decides that he has to become stronger: cue, he heads off for a year to train.
His time away isn't very elaborated on — not from Natsu's viewpoint or Lucy's. But I think it's understood that he chose not to bring along Lucy because she could be put into danger too much for him to be able to concentrate on building his strength: he knew his training would be dangerous. During this time we also have the Gildarts-scene in chapter (idk i can't be bothered to look it up but y'all know the one ↓) which is kinda debated on — who was Natsu talking about here?
I'm still not certain on if it was a heart to heart on the Igneel-matter, or if it was about his guilt of leaving Lucy behind, like many theorise. I'm not even certain that it's limited to one of them — he could be talking about both. But at the very least, this entire year was one of those "distance makes the heart grow fonder" moments for him. He wanted to get back to his normal life with Lucy so bad. After all, it wasn't like him showing up at the GMG was in order to meet Lucy — had he wanted more training after that, he'd head off again, but I don't think he could physically bring himself to do it, even if it hadn't turned out that the guild had disbanded. Though that's just me speculating a bit.
And about the guild disbandment: oh jolly, he was not happy. He had finally taken the step to grow stronger to protect everyone in his beloved guild, and here Makarov went and disbanded it? Leaving Lucy completely alone? Lucy, who once jumped from a hella high tower because she was just so devoted to stay in the Fairy Tail guild? Yeah, I think that broke him a little. At this point there was just so much guilt involved around his whole relationship with Lucy, because now he had put her through so much pain only because he brought her to Fairy Tail that day in Hargeon.
The next arcs I'd say Natsu's trying to spend his time redeeming himself for the countless things he's done bad (getting the guild back together, just generally staying by Lucy's side as much as possible). And naturally he keeps getting hit by challenge after challenge (it's not easy to be a book written by his immortal brother, yk?). And it's even harder to watch Lucy die again, this time for real (he thinks bc he's stupid and also has a tumour that's nothing less than a ticking bomb) (give this guy a break lol).
Anyways: Lucy's death nr2. Natsu can't live a life without her. Now I know — he still doesn't quite understand that it's romantic love, but I think he does understand that it's pure love. No matter if kissing and reproducing was involved, all he knew was that a life without Lucy is completely unimaginable, so blinded by rage he becomes and decides to decapitate everyone in his way (sorry about that Gray).
The last couple of moments I'll go out of my way to mention as signs of love is 1. when he's won over Acnologia and falls towards Lucy, crazy relieved, saying "I'm home", 2. Gajeel pointing out Natsu's crush on Anna, Natsu basically saying "oh that's why I like Lucy so much" (I embellished it lol) and 3. "We're still gonna be together from here on out, right?" yeah that man won't ever leave her. Ever. It's just not an option.
Now since I've only talked about specific moments, here's what I have to say about his relationship with her in general:
Throughout the main plot line, we also see a shift in Natsu's behaviour. Someone here on Tumblr pointed out that Natsu always finds a way to shield Lucy if something unexpected happens, after not being able to shield her from Future Rogue. There's also the small detail of the order he calls out to people - it goes from being pretty random, to Lucy almost alwyas being on the top of the list: likely because she's always on the top of his head. And in general I'd say that Natsu initiates (i'm adding this entire paragraph bc i realised that you asked about when Natsu initiated stuff, more than when he fell in love lol) almost all of their interractions. It's Natsu who wants Lucy to join Fairy Tail, to form a team, he's the one who enters her apartment constantly, he's always searching her out - his interest in her is at a constant high so we never feel like we get "moments" that he's paying her extra attention. He has one setting, and it's "Lucy" cranked to the max. Lol.
I could also add some HYQ moments to the mix here, but they've been few and far inbetween, and also mostly played off as jokes, so I can't really consider them as moments when Natsu initiates his love. I guess his jealousy can be considered a sign? And when (spoilers from the manga) he runs around to protect her/save her from creepy-freaky-jail (the only one who made it freaky was him, with those wild fantasies lol). Maybe I need to jog my memory a bit, but so far there hasn't been any non-pervy nalu moments initiated by Natsu in the HYQ, aside from jealousy-chap. Sadly.
Hope this gave you the answer you were hoping for! Sorry it took so long, I started writing on it and realised it would be a bible so I put it in my drafts to fetch some pics to make it less wordy, and then I forgot about it, lol. But here it is!
#fairy tail#lucy heartfilia#natsu dragneel#nalu#answering stuff#fairy tail 100 years quest#fairy tail nalu#hyq#nalu fairy tail#ft nalu#ft analysis#fairy tail analysis#fairy tail meta#ft meta
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Nicola's Easter Eggs from This Weekend/Week (and What it Could All Mean)
First, I am going to list the most important pieces of information (imo) that N posted on her IG grid or stories this weekend/week (and I will put the date it was posted- I'm on PST so some of these MIGHT have been posted on a different date for N):
Posted on N's stories on Friday, 8/9/24
Posted on N's grid on Saturday, 8/10/24
Posted on N's stories on Sunday, 8/11/24
This song was posted on N's stories on Tuesday, 8/13/24
Also, I want to stress I've been DEEP in delulu this weekend/week over all this because it's made me soo excited, but I analyzed the figure in the sunglasses from her milk tshirt pic for such a long time last night, and I swear... I am like 98% certain I see L's VERY distinct tattoo on the person in the sunglasses (and it's totally in the correct placement). I'll put the pic below. It helps if you zoom in a little bit. And after the song that she posted today, I am 99% certain at this point that L took that photo of her in the tshirt 😭😭😭 I could be wrong about the tattoo lol, BUT I still am almost certain that's him based on the arms!
What Could This All Mean??
I feel like we all have seen the theories at this point around all of these posts/stories, and the MANY Easter Eggs they all contain regarding L OR certain people adjacent to L. Therefore, I am not going to talk about all of the Easter Eggs and what they might be implying. This is what I will say:
If all of this content had not been released publicly in such a short period of time, I don't think I would really have paid that much attention to it, or have been THIS excited. However, it is precisely because N (who is VERY intentional on SM) posted ALL OF THIS in such a short period of time, knowing very well how the fandom would be interpreting it and leaving TONS of Easter Eggs that she's with L, that makes me fairly confident that there has been a VERY positive shift between L/N.
Could I be wrong? Yes. However, the song that she posted today (which I have ALWAYS loved btw 😍), clarified to me that everything she has posted since Friday wasn't just random. That song is a BIG statement! We know that N communicates through music, and this song's lyrics don't leave a lot to interpretation. It is a very sweet and happy love song! Now, could this song be about someone else, or could she just have liked the song and wanted to post it? Yes. But after EVERYTHING she posted on IG since Friday, NOBODY can convince me this song isn't about L!
I don't know what this EXACTLY means right now BTS for ALL parties involved in this situation. However, if L was going to officially acknowledge A as his girlfriend in the near future, would N have posted all of this content in such a short period of time that is very obviously related to L in the fandom? Absolutely not. I think (and a LOT all people might not agree with me on this) that this was an official acknowledgment to the fandom, specifically, that her and L are together currently and happily in love 😭😭😭 I still feel like the situation is probably a little complicated BTS, but something in my gut, based on all this public content the last few days from N, makes me feel like something BIG has changed between her and L, and N therefore feels more comfortable and confident with sharing this type of content with the fandom (and the public). I don't believe that we will get a lot of this type of content from L for a while (for LOTS of different reasons that I think are totally understandable), BUT we might get a couple of little crumbs from him (I'm thinking maybeee through songs). I also don't think they are in any place yet to go officially public, but I DO think that N will continue posting content like this if my theories are true 👀 I also feel like they may make a public announcement sooner than we expected based off of everything from the last couple of days. I have said this before, but I believe that both L/N are aware that this relationship would get serious pretty quickly if they were able to get on the same page. And I think they have 😭😍
Does this mean that L/A are done? I think so. Will we still see some material from A related to L? Maybe. I wouldn't rule that out. I get the sense though, and I have been feeling like this for a while, that L/A really haven't been doing that well in their relationship for a long time based on all the evidence that we now have.
A lot of people might not agree with all of my thoughts here, but I feel pretty confident that the song N posted today is a statement to the public, particularly the fandom, about her feelings currently for L. And it just makes my heart really happy 😍😍😍
#lukola theories#bless the telephone#I've been listening to this song ALL day lol#I literally cried when I found out N posted it 😭😍#I just LOVE N's millennial heart and how she communicates on SM ❤️️#Today was a good day ❤️️❤️️#I feel like we've been VERY well fed since Friday lol
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pairing: sebastian vettel x femalereader
summary: it's totally forbidden. he's older and your childhood and eternal crush, but there's more to that. his best friend--and your dad--is Michael Schumacher. one day, you're sick and stuck in your bed with a fever. he pays you a visit, and then the fever becomes even more brutal. HERE'S PART TWO.
warnings: sexual activities, jealousy, cursing words
(a/n): it's late at night, and I just wrote this, and I'm really, really sleepy. there might be multiple mistakes, grammar, and spelling, but HEY. the tension is still there! <3
IT HAD BEEN almost five days since everyone got informed that you were down with the flu. Michael Schumacher's beloved daughter was a concern about pretty much everyone in the paddock. Every single person cared deeply about you and Mick. Everybody knew that.
You got quite a few messages and texts from the drivers and team members in the past few days. You answered with polite, brief responses and made sure everyone knew you were just fine with the necessary drugs and medicine prescriptions.
The truth was that you had been feeling okay since a couple of days ago, but chose not to tell anyone. Rest on a bed all day was cool.
Opening your phone, you entered Instagram and wrote a brief thank you text to Daniel Ricciardo, who wished you a fast recovery. Scrolling through the app, you detected a post on your insta feed that was referring to Sebastian Vettell.
Oh, he was tour childhood crush.
Everybody freaking knew that.
You remembered that in an interview a few years ago with your father, a reporter had asked you whether or not you'd like to race for a F1 team and become a driver in the future. You response was fast and was definitely written in history. It almost immediately went viral, and people still talked about it on social media, leading to multiple fans shipping you and the famous world champion.
"No, I don't think I'm going to be a racing driver. But I'll marry one anyway, so it doesn't really matter." The spot played like a old cassette in your mind. A wide grin formed on your father's face and the reporter returned to you and lowered the microphone to reach your tiny height. You were barely 12 years old at that time.
"Who are you referring to? Lewis Hamilton? Do you like him, huh? British, humorous, handsome! He's totally so charming!"
"No, no, no, no!" Your father, Michael, bent over and picked you up in his strong arms. "I'm pretty sure the husband she's talking about is Vettell." He laughed again and you were so confused at the cameras and microphones and tons of people around you.
You were absolutely serious about craving to marry that man. He was something truly angelic to you, even though your innocent 12-year-old mind couldn't fathom how a real marriage worked.
"Oh, I get it! Blondes are better anyway!" The red-head reporter yelled and thanked you for the interview, before moving to the next driver.
You also remembered clearly the very first time you learned about Sebastian dating some girl.
A few of your dad's friends were gathered at your house, along with Sebastian. They talked about some weird strategies you couldn't analyze and had a great time together, but suddenly a question was fired at Sebastian, gaining your full attention.
"Seb, what's up with that blonde you've been going out with since last month?" A guy asked, and your gaze darkened. No one really noticed you eyeing the men behind the kitchen table. But that's what you wanted anyway.
"Who? Hannah? Oh, she seems okay, I guess." He took a sip from his bottle of beer and went on, his eyes lingering around the room. "She's hot, supportive and... not really smart but I don't mind, it's not like I'm going to marry her anyway."
They all laughed at Sebastian's words and you waited until most of the guys moved outside, near the pool in order to prepare the barbecue.
Approaching Sebastian, his eyes automatically landed up on you as he smiled.
"Hey, there, little one!" Sebastian greeted. You hated it when he called you little one. You were 17 at that time. In puberty and almost in adulthood.
"Don't call me that, Seb! I'm not 10 anymore!" You laughed and you got on your knees in front him, next to the couch.
He bent over and applied a peck on your forehead, just like he always adored to do. It was one of his special ways to show his platonic affection to you.
"I'm sorry, sweetheart." He smiled and got up, walking to the kitchen. He came back a few moments later and handed you an orange juice.
"I'd prefer the beer you're holding, thank you very much." You pushed the plastic carton of juice away and got up to grab the beer from Seb's hands. He tossed it away immediately.
"Your father would kill me, love."
Oh, love.
What a word to hear from his beautiful, full lips.
You bite your lips. Hard.
Your female hormones had been raging since a couple of years ago due to puberty. And Sebastian Vettel was so not helping with that.
You formed a fake sad face, and he sat to the couch again.
You'd love to sit in his lap right now. You used to do that when you were a little. You would wrap your hands around his neck... and stare at his baby blue eyes forever.
If the desire to sit in Seb's lap was a drug, you were totally and undoubtedly a drug addict.
But you couldn't do it now. Sebastian wouldn't let something like that happen.
A few moments later, you were sat beside him on the couch, drinking enormous sips from the juice Seb had offered you.
"It's tasty." You told him after you caught his gaze upon you.
"Um... I guess so."
You blinked a couple of times.
"Soooo... you have a girlfriend?" Your voice was steadier than you thought it'd come out.
"I don't know." He thought for a second. "It's complicated."
You automatically dragged the thin material of your cozy dress lower on your thighs when you caught his eyes traveling their for a tiny, brief moment.
"Are you in love with her?" You asked without hesitating and ignoring the previous incident.
"In love?" He repeated. "Jesus, no. I don’t think I've ever been in love before."
You didn't know if the scorching burning in your chest was a good thing. You were glad he hadn't been in love with anyone before, but simultaneously you weren't.
"Have you?" Sebastian's question caught you off guard.
"Who? Me?" Yes, you wanted to yell at him. But didn't. "No. I'm almost 17 and barely had any experiences in my love life."
"That's not certainly a bad thing." He mumbled, drinking from his beer, his lips almost immediately absorbing the liquid.
Germans loved beers. Sebastian Vettel was no exception to that rule.
"What? Having zero experiences in that area?" You asked.
It wasn't like you hadn't been kissed before. You had. Twice. By two different boys. But nothing compared to the love life other teenagers had the chance of experiencing at your age.
"Yes. It's a good thing, to say at least." His eyes were so threatening. Like there was a hidden meaning behind them.
But maybe it was just something your mind created due to the fact that... this man... oh, Gosh... you had never desired anything or anyone like him.
"Why?" You looked at him and his gaze found yours.
"You should wait for the right one." He smiled simply.
You looked at him and wanted to say that he was all you wanted. But you fucking couldn't. And that was drowning your feelings for him in deep, dark oceans.
"The heart wants what it wants." You pronounced, and Seb didn't quite get your words.
He didn't want to anyway. He knew damn well that your feelings about him were intense since you were a little kid.
The obsessed, recless, lovesick teen. That's what you thought Seb would describe you as. Little did you know he had the exact opposite opinion of you.
Seb was your frustration.
He thought you were like a daughter to him at that time. Little did he know you'd do anything to keep your promise in the future.
Bottled-up feelings. Intense feelings, unexplained issues. He caused that to you. All of it. And he didn't even know.
°•°
You were almost 19 now.
Age was by your side and the age gap between you and Seb wasn't that intense. Only 11 years. You had met multiple couples before with even bigger age difference and they lived with it in happiness and with pride.
Closing your eyes, you inhaled a big breath.
You felt greedy, insatiable.
Seb continued being pretty much the number one reason why you still had a good opinion of the masculine sex but you were careful and avoided showing it to everyone anymore. Paparazzi and the media always tended to make things even bigger.
It was just a few minutes before noon when a knock on the door sounded like a thunderous lightning in your sensitive ears. You hadn't communicated with a singe soul in a couple of days because you wouldn't risk infecting anyone else with the virus, even though you already feeling extremely better.
Beforing bothering to hear you climbing out of the bed, a familiar figure of a male swung the door open and closed it sat afterwards, swaying the keys in his hands.
"Seb?" Your voice was weak as you got out of the coziness of your bed and approached the door. "How the hell do you have my keys?"
The German man turned to you and gestured to be sat on the bed once again, as if you were so fragile and threatened to break just because of a silly virus. Sebastian was so dramatic. But you didn't. complain as you gained your soft spot on the mattress again because his white button-up shirt blurt your thoughts and your vision. He had rolled the light fabric on his wrists, highlighting even more his rough hands.
"I asked Mick to lend them to me so I could pass by here and check up on my favorite girl."
His words buzzed in your ears.
What did he just say?
He used to call you random nicknames, some of them cute and others... kind of silly, but 'my favorite girl'?
That was too much for your complicated mind to analyze.
Sebastian sat down opposite of you.
As he faced you and said absolutely nothings, his state felt scorching. Like a burning flame, attempting to read your thoughts, which were too hard to be hidden between the curtains of your eyelashes.
You had always known he could read you like an open book. And you always hated that exceptional ability of his.
Sometimes, he could unearth thoughts in you that no one else could. Not even your father, nor your brother, and sometimes not even you...
"How are you feeling, (y/n)?" His soft smile faded, blue, intense eyes focused on you, eyeing you from head to toes as if he could detect any physical pain just by observing your body.
"How do I look?" You fired back, without hesitation.
You didn't mean to sound flirtatious at all. But... oh, well, the look on Sebastian's face read something entirely different...
You were kind of mad at him that he chose to pass by your apartment without calling or messaging you first. You tried to make him gather that without saying it, but your tone didn't come out the way that you wanted it to.
"If you ask me, you don't look ill at all." Sebastian crossed his arms, his veins popping out of the white fabric. "You look... I don't know..." He gave in, eyes traveling everywhere in the room but you.
You felt a warm wave of air coming your way from the opened windows, so you chose to unzip your thin cardigan a little bit more. Your grey sweatpants were too hot for you at the moment, but the idea of changing into something more loose didn't occur to you earlier.
"Sebastian, I look like a fucking sloth that's been eating leafy greens, rice and pasta for five days in a row!" You laughed but the blond man didn't seem to be amused by your humorous comment. When you faced his cold state, your expression transformed into something more serious. "Why didn't you call before visiting?"
"The answer is too simple and you're too smart to even ask." He shrugged, annoyed. "Because I know you wouldn't let me come."
You hadn't seen Sebastian like that never before. He seemed... different. He always used to laugh with you, enjoy some movies, play video games or boarding games with you for fun...
But now...
He looked so changed and you can't understand why.
"Why wouldn't I let you come, Seb?"
He took a deep, deep breath before answering. "Because you're just as stubborn as me. I wouldn't let you come and visit me while I'm sick either. Even though you--"
Your phone buzzed with a notification on the nightstand, causing Seb's speech to come to a hault.
Another notification popped up and the screen illuminated once again.
One more and then another one...
You stretched your whole body and grabbed your device. Glancing at the screen, you read five unanswered messages from Lando.
This guy tries to catch up with you always when the time isn't right.
Sebastian got up from the chair near your desk. "Who is it?" He asked, trying to keep the coolness in his tone.
"A friend."
"Is it Norris?" Seb snapped.
You instantly looked up from your screen. "How the hell do you know Norris texts me?"
Sebastian smirked and took a seat close to you on the bed. But he was still too far. You needed him closer to make you forget about your frustration with him.
"A spend three quarters of my day with your brother."
"Oh, Mick, you're such a traitor." You muttered to yourself as you shoved your phone under the sheets.
"He just cares about you. We all do." Seb seemed to hesitated for his upcoming words. "You'll always be our best girl."
Our?
Fuck. It felt like he tried so hard to hide his thoughts.
But they say that the eyes are the window to your soul.
"Seb, are you flirting with me?" You shot, keeping your voice calm and steady.
"You want me to stop?" His answer was instant, causing your entire body and face to redden.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
You'd been waiting for this moment almost 20 years and now... that it was finally happening, you didn't know what to do.
"No," you muttered. "But I expected you to do something more than that. You were always the brave one, remember?"
Whatever it took to fulfill your eternal dream.
Seb stood up and did something you never expected him to do. Even though every part of you craved this moment to come in many dreams.
He kneeled in front you.
Fuck.
His blue eyes were the most beautiful thing you had ever seen. "Seb, what are you--"
"Open your legs for me, love." He murmured, looking up at you with his fingers genrly pressing on your bare thigh.
You felt your cheeks redden. Again.
It felt insane how instant your body's reaction was to his words and touch. As if it had a mind of its own.
Seb's voice forced you back to reality when you realized you stared at him speechless. "I won't repeat myself."
You shivered and opened up your legs for him, welcoming his warm and long fingers.
"You won't kiss me?" Your voice was barely audible.
"I'm not going to make it that easy for you, babe."
"W-what do you mean?"
A smirk appeared. "I suppose you'll have to beg for it."
♡♡♡
Part 2.
#f1 drivers#f1#formula 1#formula 1 imagine#formula one#f1 memes#formula 1 memes#formula one oneshot#formula one imagine#sebastian vettel x reader#sebastian vettel imagine#sebastian vettel fanfic#seb vettel#sebastian vettel#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 x y/n#f1 x oc#f1 x female reader#f1 smut#f1 fluff#formula one fic#formula 1 one shot#formula one fanfiction#formula 1 smut#formula 1 fluff#sebastian vettel x you#formula one x reader#formula one x you#formula one x y/n
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Kenny McCormick x Reader - i luv your girl
Also available on ao3!
Summary: Being stood up when you have the absolutely perfect anniversary date planned would be enough to send anyone spiraling and make them question if anything is even worth it at this point. Luckily for you, the perfect loverboy is willing to sweep you off your feet and show you a good time to help you make a decision.
Warnings: Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content (everyone involved is above the age of consent), Cunnilingus, Face-Sitting, Penis In Vagina Sex, Cowgirl Position, Semi-Public Sex, Cheating/Infidelity
A/N: Ugh, I am so fucking sorry. I had this thing like, 75% done on my Docs, and then something else on my life took complete chokehold on me and I couldn't make any progress on it at all for several days. I promise I'll try to write quicker and post more often in the future. Next up on the chopping block (I'm not actually chopping him up, though he deserves it) is Kyley-B, for a request (I'm taking those now) (Also sorry to the follower for taking so long to get to it I am a disgrace)
“Come on… Come on… Pick it up, will you…”
Clutching my phone in my hands firmly, close to my face as I stared at it with my eyes drifting between the ‘Call’ screen and the battery icon, I paced back and forth on the sidewalk. The sun shined bright and beautiful in the sky, still my mood was anything but - the nerves were exponentially starting to get to me, and I was on my last line.
It was supposed to be my two-year dating anniversary with my current boyfriend, and I had the whole day planned to perfection. Taking advantage of the fact that the weather forecast was announcing a very warm and sunny day - which is rare for our town -, I planned to spend the whole day with my man, starting off with a whole picnic in the park around the local pond. I was wearing my prettiest floral sundress and had a whole basket full of goodies to be enjoyed under the sunlight. Had made sure to arrive early and wait in a place that was of easy access for both me and my partner so we could walk to our destination together. It was all perfect.
Perfect, except for the absence of my other half.
For three hours now I had been waiting, sitting on a bench near a local restaurant that I usually frequent for lunch on workdays, looking around all the time for any signs of him, and he had not arrived. I called and called with my phone but they all went to voicemail, sent a bunch of texts that stayed on delivered - and worse, my battery was now close to dying out, since I forgot to charge it before I left, not thinking it was important since I didn’t plan on spending so much time on my phone anyway. It was currently running at 4% as I tried to call him as many times as possible before it died out and I had to think of another plan.
My heart skipped a beat as the call was answered.
“Baby? Baby! Where are you?” I exclaimed as I put my phone to my ear, my agitation clear on my voice.
*“Mmmmm… Hey, babe… What’s up���” *An extremely groggy version of my boyfriend’s voice came through the phone’s speakers, not nearly close to matching my anxiety.
“What do you mean, what’s up? Where are you?” My mind already had a faint idea of the answer, but I had a sliver of hope in my heart that it might be wrong.
“Huh… In bed.”
Of fucking course. “In bed? How? It's almost 2pm! We were supposed to meet three hours ago!” It was not my intention to scold him, but in my exasperation it sounded exactly like that.
A few seconds of silence from the other side of the call as my partner seemingly processed the information. *“Damn… Sorry, babe. I stayed up late gaming with the boys and slept through the alarm.” *He sounded slightly less groggy now, like my revelation was a shock to his brain, but not by much.
“I called you so many times, though!” I countered, “Why didn’t you pick those up?”
*“Yeah, sorry about that. I thought it was telemarketing or something.” *His voice didn’t carry a hint of remorse.
I took a deep breath, trying not to scream or make a scene right there on the street. The day was so beautiful, I just didn’t wanna waste it arguing. “Well, you’re still coming, right?” I asked, trying my best to sound patient and less accusatory. “Can you give me an ETA or something?”
“Babe, let’s just… Let’s just take a rain check, alright? It’s late already.” *He sounded as nonchalant as could be as he said that, as if the thing he was cancelling wasn’t our literal anniversary date. *“I promise I’ll make it up to you some other time.”
“It’s our anniversary, baby! I’m already here! What do you-”
With a jolly ringtone, the call was cut short. I put my phone in front of my eyes just in time to see the animation of it turning off on the screen, my battery breathing its last before the device died completely.
And then there was just me.
In small, shaky steps, I made my way to a street bench nearby and sat down, setting my picnic basket to my side and watching with glazed eyes as the cars went by on the street, still clutching my phone in my hand. After waiting for so long, making excuses for my boyfriend’s tardiness on what was supposed to be a date to celebrate the day our relationship started, a date I planned from beginning to end and made sure was completely flawless, it all went to shit in the span of one phone call that didn’t even get to end because I ran out of battery before it could. I was left alone, heartbroken, stressed and with no way of going back home except on foot.
Allowing myself to have at least one thing I wanted, I lowered my face, hiding it with my hands, and let the tears roll fast and plentiful. My whole body shook as I sobbed, all the nerves of the day taking physical form in the salty droplets running from my eyes, as I recalled not just how much of a bad current situation I was in, but all the previous disappointments in my relationship that I swept under the rug because of love. And, deep down, I knew I was likely to let the broom of my self-neglect swipe this one, too.
For what felt like forever, this was all that I had. One of the prettiest outfits of my life, a basket full of food, painful memories running through my mind, tears that didn’t seem to be able to stop running down my cheeks. Until I got something else.
“Hey… Ma’am? Miss?” A gentle male voice called near me, seemingly out of nowhere, bringing me back to the world of the living, so to speak. “Can I help you? Do you need anything?”
I shook my head, still not looking to the source of the sound, now feeling deeply ashamed of myself. Engrossed in my own feelings, I forgot this was still public space and someone was bound to question me at any time, considering how nosy people in this small town tend to be. “I’m fine,” my voice cracked a bit as I said it.
“I am pretty sure you aren’t,” The voice responded, with a sliver of irony, but still gentle, like he wanted to make sure I knew he wasn’t laughing at me. I felt a hand on my bare shoulder - calloused fingers shook it with just as much kindness as I heard in the voice behind them.
“It’s alright, sir,” I sniffled while trying to steady my voice, hoping my fake reassurance would be enough to make this unknown person leave already. “I’ll be leaving soon, don’t worry about it.”
“‘Sir’ is my dad,” He chuckled, “My name is Kenny. At least to all the pretty girls. So call me Kenny.”
His response took a small giggle out of me, even if my whole mind found it inappropriate to do so considering the circumstances. Whoever it was that tried to talk to me was actually making an effort to make things better, not just ask questions out of obligation or curiosity. Slowly, I wiped my tears away with my hands, answered him with my own name and lifted my face up, trying to put an image to ‘Kenny’. And put an image to it I did.
It was almost like the head and body of two different action figures smashed into one. From the neck down, it was simple and rather elegant. The man wore all black, as was common for that restaurant’s waiters; The usual dress shirt with the restaurant’s logo had its first two or three buttons open, making it just slightly more stylish. The charcoal gray apron wrapped around his hips was perfectly spotless like it had never been worn before, and he wore a pair of dress shoes that seemed to have been recently shined.
Once my eyes went up, though, everything seemed to change. His blond hair was styled in some sort of shaggy mullet. The very visible dark circles under his eyes came as a stark contrast to his laid-back posture and the youthful energy I just felt emanating from his body. On the matter of his eyes, I couldn’t pinpoint their color for the life of me; Some trick of the sunlight was clearly at play in them, because in some angles they were blue and in others I could’ve sworn they were lavender. Some tiny reddish nicks speckled his jawline and chin, likely from shaving and not doing a very good job at it. When his mouth was open, I could see that his teeth were slightly crooked, and he had a bit of a gap between the front two on the top row.
The things that were the most startling about his appearance, though, were the scars and piercings on his face, and those he had several of. I could count two eyebrow piercings, a nose ring, a single earring on his right ear and an industrial bar on the other that seemed to still be healing. On the matter of scars, all of them were healed and faded, but screamed gruesome stories; One on his upper lip that went up to end at the side of his nostril, another one on his temple, and a third, the biggest, started on the right side of his jaw and went all the way down to the start of his neck.
To be honest, I liked the look of the top part more than the bottom.
As he saw me looking up at him, the corners of his lips curved into a smile, a genuine one filled with kindness. “Wanna talk to someone about it?” He asked as he pushed my picnic basket on the bench away and sat to my side, leaning forwards with his face towards me.
“Ugh… No, I just…” My fingers ran through my hair in stress as I threw my head back, feeling my eyes burn with tears again and trying to chase them away so I could at least leave this situation and go home without further questions.
“Let me guess… boy troubles?”
It was a rather sexist guess on his part, but I wasn’t about to fight it, because he happened to be right. “How do you…?”
I turned my face to look at him and he pointed to my hand on my hair, where on my ring finger rested a thin silver band with my boyfriend’s name engraved on the inside. “You’ve got a ring.” Turns out he wasn’t being misogynistic at all. He was just too attentive, something I’m not used to.
With a sigh, I slouched forwards with my face down again.
“Now I’m curious,” Kenny admitted as he leaned back on the seat of the bench, resting his arms on top of it, “What kind of monster made a goddess like you cry like that?”
I shook my head again and pointed to his shirt, specifically to the restaurant’s logo embroidered on the uniform. “Don’t you have somewhere to be right now?”
“Don’t worry about it. The place’s practically empty right now. Most people are at the mall or at Stark’s Pond anyway.” He shrugged. “And besides… I shouldn’t tell you this, but my boss is acting kinda crazy thinking you’re scouting the place to rob. So me being here probably puts his mind at ease because now he has a witness.”
Great. Just lovely. Now, on top of my whole shitty life situation, I’ll also have to find all the workers at that place looking at me funny whenever I go in for lunch. “So you told him you’d come here to teach the possible thief a lesson?”
“No. I told him there was no way in Hell someone as adorable as you was up to no good.” It was the third compliment on my appearance in less than five minutes of interaction. Apparently he was the type of man to not be deterred by something as ‘insignificant’ as a woman’s boyfriend, and I wasn’t sure how to feel about that.
“Well, your boss can rest assured,” I said, “I was just waiting here to go on a date. No robbery plans.”
“That’s what I thought.” He nodded slowly. “But I saw you while I was working. You’ve been here quite a while. What happened?”
“Well…” I took a deep breath, trying to put it all into words without bawling immediately - it still didn’t stop some tears from falling and my voice from cracking as I finally spoke again, “Apparently, my boyfriend slept past his alarm and forgot our anniversary date.”
Sudden movement to my side had me startled and I looked up again. Kenny was on his feet, an exasperated expression on his face. “What a bastard! YOU’RE sitting here, looking like a fucking snack for him, and your stupid ass boyfriend is at his place sleeping when he could be ravaging you?”
This man sounded genuinely indignant, even if extremely crude - in a twisted way, it only served to fill my brain up with more thoughts that maybe I wasn’t being treated as decently as I deserved, because I found myself not wanting to dispute him or make excuses for my boyfriend’s behaviour, either. “Don’t put it like that…”
“I always put it in in many ways,” Kenny sat back down next to me on the bench, the double entendre he spat definitely understood and ignored by me when I tried my best not to laugh, “And the only thing your boyfriend there seems to be putting is stress on your shoulders.”
He put his hand on my back and rubbed it gently slowly, as if trying to physically remove this figurative weight he mentioned - and, surprisingly, I felt it working even if just a little bit. My facial expression probably gave my enjoyment away, because he didn’t remove his hand even after he stopped moving it, and I let him keep it like that.
“I mean, it’s not that bad…” I avoided Kenny’s gaze as I uttered those words, and immediately the pain he had soothed came crashing down again. “”It’s just one date. I’m sure it’s-”
“Don’t you start this on me now,” Kenny interrupted before I could continue my poor attempt at a dispute, “You know it is that bad. It’s your anniversary. Fuck, if I had a chick willing to do all that for me, I’d stick to her like bubblegum on a shoe,” he chuckled nervously as he ran his fingers through his hair, the thought of having someone who cared about him that much apparently making his brain run amok - he was probably the type of person to try to get things done for people instead of the other way around.
“And I’ll say more,” he took a deep breath and continued as he took note of my silence, “Even if it was just a date, you should still be pissed. You agreed on something and he fucked it up. And now you’re here, looking sad and hot. If this happened to any of your girl friends, you’d tell them to send the garbage dick to the gutters, wouldn’t you?”
I tried opening my mouth to argue further, try to defend my man’s behaviour or justify it, but found myself running dry of the excuses I usually had on hand. It was like something inside of me had snapped, and if there was one goddamn day of my relationship where I would allow myself to be angry and expect reparations, it would be this one.
“Thanks, Kenny,” I murmured, nodding slowly and letting my gratitude shine through my eyes as well when I gazed into his, “Means a lot.”
“Don’t mention it,” he shook his head, making his shaggy hair flow beautifully and frame his face even better, “Consider this my first real attempt at becoming employee of the month.”
In a weird way, Kenny’s presence and his charisma were starting to make me feel better. I felt drawn to continue talking to him, if just to hear his voice more.
“Are you a new hire?” I asked, signaling with my head towards the restaurant where he worked at, “I come here often and I’ve never seen you there before.”
“Oh, no no no, I’ve been there a couple of months now,” Kenny was quick to answer, waving his hand in front of him to emphasize the negative, “But I usually just do cleaning duty and help in the kitchen. They don’t want me waiting tables because I ain’t exactly got a face for customer service.”
I didn’t argue with his comment, but it wasn’t for a lack of wanting to. The man sitting next to me was absolutely handsome. Every single one of his features displayed intense personality and charm, and the words in his voice always sounded extremely seductive no matter the subject. Kenny had a natural magnetism to him that most men could never have no matter how hard they tried. However, he was nonetheless a bit rough around the edges, and the piercings and scars probably were a red flag when it came to employment. Not his fault and there was nothing wrong with him, the only one to blame was our current society.
“Anyway, today I’m actually covering for a friend of mine,” Kenny continued, “Got in some sort of trouble and couldn’t be here, so he asked me to cover for him and it was the least I could do.”
Using my amassed knowledge of the restaurant’s usual waiters, I went through my mental images of all of their faces to try and guess who his friend could be. There was this other young man, about our age… “Is it the other blond guy? Also with the… You know, over his eye?” I moved my finger in front of my left eye, tracing a scar I remembered the other man having. Were facial scars an integral part of the restaurant’s uniform?
“Butters. That’s him.” Kenny nodded with a smile. “Really nice dude. Reliable. He’s covered my ass a couple of times, vouched for me to get this job too. I gotta check on him later to see if everything’s alright, he never misses a workday.”
The sincerity in Kenny’s voice and the way he beamed about his colleague made my heart feel warmer. There was obviously more to their friendship than just being work buddies, and I was sure this ‘Butters’ guy was very near and dear to him. Maybe next time I went in there for lunch we could strike a conversation or something.
But all good things must come to an end. With a stinging reminder that I still had a phone with zero battery on me and a whole walk to my house ahead, which would set me back on my ‘not think of my life’ objective a lot, I decided I should just cut that umbilical cord and let my new buddy go back to living his own.
“Well, Kenny… I think I really need to go. Don’t wanna take up any more of your time.” I run my hands over my eyes one more time, even though the tears have already all spilled by now and are basically dry. “Thanks for everything. All the best to you.”
I get up from the bench and wave him a goodbye, but feel him grab my wrist and tug at it as I try to leave. When I turn to him again, he’s holding up my picnic basket in his hand. “You forgot your… your thing here.”
He pushes it toward me, but I don’t pick it up, instead just making a dismissing motion with my free hand. “Keep it.” I shook my head. “I’m not hungry anyway. Think of it as a token of appreciation for keeping me company.”
“You’re not hungry? That’s bullshit!” He gets on his feet as well and tries giving me the basket again, more insistently this time. “You were waiting here for hours without eating. You must be starving.”
Kenny wasn’t wrong. During our whole conversation, I could feel the familiar pangs of hunger in my belly, my body’s painful way of begging me for sustenance. However, just thinking of coming back home all alone and having to eat all the food I prepared for me and my boyfriend, knowing full well that it was supposed to be for a special occasion and I had instead been bailed on like it was nothing, was enough to make my eyes burn again with the threat of another crying session. I wouldn’t be able to do it.
To keep myself from crying again, I just let out a downcast sigh. “It’s alright. There’s too much for just me anyway, I don’t want it to go bad. If you keep it you can at least share with your buddies or something.”
“Well, I’m still not taking what’s yours, that’d be fucked up. But…” His eyes darted to the side, looking towards his workplace, then back to the basket his holding and then finally to me again.
“But?”
“Well, as it turns out, I haven’t had my lunch break yet.” His hand releases its grasp on my wrist and he picks up his phone in the pocket of his apron briefly to check the time, putting it right back after he does. “So I think you can still have that picnic.”
It was unbelievable. “You’d… Do that for me?”
“It would be a real mistake to let such a perfectly prepared meal go to waste.” He made a gesture with his hand, towards my picnic basket - a gesture that I could’ve sworn encompassed me as well, theory only made stronger by the mischievous glint I definitely saw in his eyes.
His boldness had me flabbergasted. In any other situation, I’d be nothing short of horrified at the thought of an unknown man inviting himself to my business like that and basically taking over my day - but Kenny had been so kind, helping me with nothing but caring words as I bawled my eyes out, taking time away from his work to make sure an unknown woman was safe and okay while asking for absolutely nothing in return. And he seemed so genuine about it, too - even if he had made some playful passes, I wasn’t the slightest bit uncomfortable around him. He was being extremely nice about all of it and I found myself not ready to go back home and face the music of my terrible life just yet; Maybe Kenny and I really could have a great time together, even if it wasn’t what I originally planned.
“If you really want to…” I give him a gentle smile. “Let’s go, then.”
His eyes light up like a child’s as he hears my acceptance, and he hands me my basket to hold before starting to walk with purpose past me, leaving me confused. “Just stay here for a bit, okay? Don’t go nowhere.” He calls out to me, but as he sees my eyes widening and a little sadness flash behind them - I hadn’t considered that I’d had to wait even more for Kenny now, and my whole experience with today had me a little paranoid -, he’s quick to add: “I swear I’ll be quick, it’s just to warn the other folk! Be back in a flash!”
With a deep breath, I decide to trust him on this one. “Go, go!” I yell with urgency, turning my attention to other parts of my surroundings while he goes do what needs to be done.
Luckily I didn’t have to wait long. After just a couple minutes my ears picked up rushed footsteps coming in my direction - Kenny was now straight up running to meet me. He looked mostly the same, with a few key differences; He had ditched his apron completely and was now wearing a big orange parka with brown details on the hoodie. It looked cheap , old and beat-up, with a bunch of very visible stitching on the seams, like it had ripped off and been sewn back together multiple times before. It also had a couple dried dark stains splattered around it, but I wasn’t about to ask what they were.
“Feeling cold?” I pointed at the new addition to his outfit.
Kenny shook his head and shrugged, the jacket making a very characteristic plastic-like sound with his movement. “Just thought I might need it.”
You’re gonna sweat in that was my immediate thought, but the judgement that followed was to not to waste any time debating his decision, he’s a grown adult and must have his reasons. I adjusted the basket on my forearm as I began to walk, but Kenny quickly moved to my side and pulled it away from me, locking his right arm with my left one and holding the basket with his other hand. I turned to him with a confused look, but he said nothing about it, instead choosing to go on about something entirely unrelated as we made our way to our destination.
༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩♡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚
The trip to Stark’s Pond was quite short, but filled with fun and laughter all the way nonetheless. Kenny was making progress on his objective of keeping me distracted from my current situation, telling me lots of jokes and sneaking compliments every other sentence like it was second nature for him to say them, which it might as well be. I had no doubt that, for anyone who went past us on the street and didn’t know who we were, the only thing they saw was one extremely happy couple.
I ended up learning lots of stuff about him, too. He opened up like a library book, probably to compensate for the fact that he saw me so vulnerable earlier. I found out that he was an extremely hardworking man, needing money not only for his daily expenses but also to help his little sister pay her university tuition - between that and his treatment of me, a person he barely knew, I had no doubt he truly had a heart of gold.
Besides the daily shifts at the restaurant and some odd jobs here and there whenever he got some free time, he was regularly busy during weekend nights, working as a bartender at a club in Main Street. I knew the place like the back of my hand. It was my old stomping ground - I had spent many a crazy Friday and Saturday night there, and it was also where I had met my current boyfriend, a drunk hookup that became a bigger thing. Ironically enough, once we made it official, he began to get bothered whenever I talked of going there and would give me the silent treatment if I did, so I eventually just abandoned it altogether to keep the peace.
“Well, if you ever feel like coming back,” Kenny said after I commented on the coincidence, “Then keep me company at the bar. Drinks on me. And not that overpriced stuff full of ice we usually make. Real alcohol.”
I told him he was full of shit and waved him off, but made a mental note of what he said… Just in case.
When we arrived at the lake, it was immediately verified that Kenny’s predictions about what the people in town were doing for the sunny day were correct. The park surrounding the pond was peppered with couples in love whispering sweet nothings to each other while watching the clouds, families with children throwing frisbees to their dogs, and groups of teenagers being as loud as they usually are and causing stress to everyone around them. My eyes scanned the space around me, looking for a decent open spot to sit down - meanwhile, Kenny just kept walking like he already knew where he wanted to go, and I absentmindedly followed him.
The realization that we had deviated a little from the main path only comes to me when the sound beneath my feet goes from soft grass to crunching twigs. We were breaching the forest nearby, Kenny bringing me swiftly around the trees like his legs had their positions down pat. I knew for a fact that there was a trail of beaten dirt through this same forest for those who wished to take a stroll in it, but we weren’t following that path. As I shoot an inquisitive glance and a frown towards my new friend, he just smiles, acknowledging my confusion but not missing pace over it.
“Don’t worry your pretty little head about it, I have the perfect spot,” He turned to me, pointing over his shoulder with his thumb. “Unless you wanna go back and we can go sit next to those highschoolers with the speakers blasting 6ix9ine.”
I shook my head quickly and emphatically, immediately getting a pep in my step. “Oh no, I trust you on this one.”
Our little unexpected promenade didn’t last for much longer. Soon the trees started to spread more distant from each other, and we arrived at a small open area, a random glade I had never seen before. The tree canopies bunched together didn’t create their patchy roof over our heads any longer, so the sun was free to shine and warm up my skin. The branches fallen on the ground were few and far between, and the grass was decently smooth and level, perfect for relaxing on it. No animals were to be seen, probably scattered away much earlier after hearing our noises, but I could hear birds singing in the distance and catch one or two flying high above our heads.
“This is a nice place, Kenny!” I exclaimed, turning to him with a smile. “How much roaming around the forest did you do to find it?”
“I guess I’ve known about it for a while. Me and my bros come here all the time to have a smo- Think. We come here to think.” I laughed after hearing Kenny immediately try to correct himself, his sudden interest in a tiny pebble on the grass not going unnoticed either.
“You don’t have to hide it from me, I’m not a prude.” I shrugged. “Think anyone else might get the same idea today?”
“Nah, I don’t think so. And if they do, trust me, they’re gonna leave.”
Deciding once again to not question Kenny’s words or his methods, I opened up the basket in my arm and picked up a yellow and white checkered picnic blanket, opening it up and stretching it over the grass. My unexpected companion immediately started to help me spread the contents of the basket neatly on top of it, making all our food options easily visible.
And there were many of them. I had been quite proud of myself beforehand for managing to prepare a decent amount of stuff for my date, but it dawned on me that if I hadn’t had Kenny by my side it would have taken me a couple of days to get through it all on my own at home. Me and my improbable new friend talked a bunch more while we made quick work of the small club sandwiches, homemade chicken pie, carrot cake, some assorted snacks and drinks from the grocery store, and…
“Chocolate-covered strawberries? Seriously?” Kenny held up the small red box, shaking it slightly. “The big expensive ones too. You really went all out for this.”
“Hey, I forgot I had that! These are the best!” I let out a small squeal of surprise, the memory of having picked up the sweet treat earlier at the candy store having gotten lost in my head over all the stress I went through. I reach my arm towards Kenny, the tiny box too far away for me to get to it naturally. ”Can you pass me one, please?”
After I finished my request, my ears picked up some particularly close chirping, and I quickly turned my head around to look for any sign of a small bird that could be producing it, my hand still extended towards Kenny with my fingers wiggling as I waited for him to give me one of the sweet treats. I heard the characteristic noise of the box being opened, and something being shuffled inside of it, but nothing ever made its way to me. When I turned to see what was taking Kenny so long, I realized why - Kenny was staying put with one of the strawberries held between his teeth with half of it sticking out of his mouth. He couldn’t speak, but his eyes held the message of what he wanted me to do next.
I had to admit, I considered it for a brief moment. It was a simple act of play, but so sensual as well - I hadn’t been able to do this kind of silly stuff in quite a while, and it ignited something in me that had been dormant for a while now. I felt wanted. However, my moral compass was still blaring its sirens loudly in my brain, and I didn’t want to lead my whole life astray just because one guy I just met was giving me all the attention I needed. “Oh, come on, give me that!” I feigned annoyance and reached over to try and pick the fruit out from between Kenny’s teeth, but he quickly just gets all of it inside of his mouth and starts chewing.
“Had to at least try.” He chuckled, with his mouth still full, before picking out another strawberry from the box and handing it over to me properly this time.
“Do you try this with every girl who offers you food?” I inquired with irony in my voice as I plucked the small leaves off the top of the fruit, “The whole loverboy act?”
He swallows before answering this time. “Only when they’re as cute as you are,” He replied, “Which means I’ve never done it before in my entire life.”
If my eyes could roll back further into my head, they’d dislodge from it. “Like I said, Kenny, you’re full of shit,” I retorted right before popping the whole strawberry in my mouth, closing my eyes to savor its taste. My next words came slightly messed up, as I spoke with my mouth full, covering it with my hand. “I bet the girls are all over you with that.”
While I chewed on the fruit, Kenny stayed totally silent, his eyes scanning the plaid pattern of the picnic blanket under him. “What if it’s not an act, though?”
The sudden seriousness in his tone made my eyes shoot open immediately, and I flinched a bit, a frown creasing my forehead.
Kenny started scooting closer and wrapped his arms around me, suddenly pulling my body in one quick motion so I was seated between his legs while he hugged me tightly from behind. I tensed up completely in his arms, and didn’t dare make a movement even when his heavy breathing on my shoulder made the fine hairs behind my neck stand up. “Ken… I…” My uttering was almost non-audible, voice still strained from the surprise.
He grinned against the crook of my neck. “Ken, huh?” Kenny’s murmurs came out slightly muffled by my skin, “I can be that today, if you need me to. Just say it.”
“What are we doing, Ken?” My voice slowly started coming back to me, and I looked down towards the grass, seeing Kenny’s leg stretched right next to mine, barely touching it. He was too close now for me to be able to shake off his advances or pretend they’re just jokes; There was nowhere to go but right through them. “I shouldn’t be here…”
“What you *should *be is with someone who values you.” He cut my sentence with a firm and decided tone in his voice, getting a tighter hold of me between his arms. “A real man, not that sucker you’re dating right now. Someone who treats you right.”
I wanted to argue with him, ask him who he thinks he is to assume things about a woman he barely knows - but I knew his words to be true, there’s no point I can try to make that will make them not so.
Seeing that I was both not moving from my position and not disputing his claims, my guess is that he had newfound energy to get his point across, because he continued talking. “Do you know what I would do if I had a woman like you by my side, huh?” Kenny rhetorically asked, his voice almost a growl. “I’d wake up at the crack of dawn every day to provide for her. I’d make love to her every single night. I’d be the one planning dates and showing her a good time. I wouldn’t leave you alone to cry in the middle of the fucking street, I’d be too busy making you happy instead.”
“You said ‘you’ right now.” I immediately pointed out, even though it’s unnecessary. “Not ‘her’. ‘You.’”
“And I fucking meant it.”
With that, one of his arms loosened its wrap on my body and reached far for the tiny box containing the chocolate strawberries, and he picked one up in his hands, bringing it close to our faces. This one had a different design from all the others - instead of the usual white chocolate lines over the milk chocolate covering, this one’s got small red hearts as well. It’s more detailed, a tiny touch of romance to what is usually a very sexy treat in nature. Kenny cleaned the leaves out of the strawberry and took a bite out of it, holding the other half close to my lips. My nostrils immediately took in the sweet scent of the fruit, but I didn't open my mouth just yet.
“Look, I won’t force you to do anything you don’t wanna do. But if you let me, I’ll make you feel real good. Promise.” He murmured, digging his left hand’s fingers on the soft side of my belly one last time. The ball was fully on my court, but I could still feel the hints of his desperation for my body as he waited patiently for my answer.
Slowly and nervously, I parted my lips and let Kenny put the small piece of strawberry inside of my mouth himself, hearing him sigh in relief behind me as he did so. Once he withdrew his fingers from my mouth, that’s when I finally bit down on the small treat. This one isn’t as sweet as the others; It might not have been as perfectly ripe, so it had a tiny tinge of sourness mixed up in the fruit’s flavor. The milk chocolate around the fruit almost masked it up completely, though - the whole combination tasted absolutely heavenly, not just for the fruit, but also for the implications of it. I was in deep now.
Kenny almost doesn’t wait for me to swallow what’s in my mouth before turning my face to his and kissing me fiercely, his left hand getting tangled with the hair in the back of my head. I kissed him back with the same amount of fervor almost immediately, and all of my worries over this whole situation dissipated from my head like dry ice; Fuck what needed to happen for us to get to this point, fuck my problems and how I’d sort them out, fuck morals and especially fuck the outside world. This tiny little section of the forest was our own personal bubble, and I’d live in it for as long as I could.
When the tip of Kenny’s tongue brushed my bottom lip and I opened my mouth to grant it access, I realized I hadn’t accounted for one more piercing of his. The tiny little ball sitting in the middle of his tongue didn’t feel as cold as I thought it would, so it was more the sudden change in hardness and texture that threw me off a bit. I kept my cool, though, as I put my hands on both sides of his face and pulled it even closer to mine. I decided to try something out and touched his piercing with the tip of my tongue, flicking it ever so gently - I immediately felt Kenny’s hard-on twitch inside of his pants against my lower back.
As our tongues slid around each other and explored our connected mouths, his right hand slowly made its way up my thigh, sneaking under my clothes, ghosting over my bare pussy. I had been having so much fun with this man today, I’d completely forgotten I wasn’t wearing anything under my dress. Just this slight contact was enough to make my breath hitch and Kenny broke the kiss, his hand freezing in place.
When I opened my eyes, he was unapologetically staring at me. Mouth agape in surprise, pupils wide, it almost seemed like the whole galaxy was behind his eyes with the way they shined. Kenny looked like what someone would if you told them all of their dreams had come true at the same time.
“What a lucky son of a bitch.” He uttered almost non-audibly, the corners of his mouth slowly curving upwards into a delighted smile. For a moment, I wondered if he was talking about my actual partner or about himself. I wasn’t able to ask, though - Kenny’s left hand immediately grabbed my chin and tilted my head up, holding my face, ear and neck in perfect positions for him to start kissing, sucking and biting them voraciously.
The middle and index fingers on his right hand went back to gliding up and down my folds, picking up the building slick from my entrance and spreading it all over before settling over my clit and drawing quick tight circles over the bundle of nerves. Before I knew it, I was putty in Kenny’s hands, squirming and arching my back as much as I could in his grasp, my moans filling his ears and working as fuel for his ministrations.
Eliciting a whine of annoyance from my mouth when he did, Kenny took his hands away from me, not without planting one last wet kiss to my jaw. While I cooled down, steadying my breath, he brought his fingers over to his mouth, sucking on them and licking slowly. Then he sighed. “Fuck, no. This won’t do at all. Need you on my face, baby.”
I didn’t even have time to register what he said or the implications of it before he let go of my body and started moving behind me, stretching his legs under mine. When I quickly turned back to see what was up, he was already fully laid down with his head on the blanket, hands pulling at my thighs like he wanted to bring me closer to his upper body.
“Wait, what?” I tried to get up at my feet, but his pulling made me lose balance and I quickly sat back down as gently as I could, my knees now at both sides of his abdomen.
“Come on, over here,” he called, still trying to drag me over his body towards his face, “Or do you want me to beg? Because I’ll do it.”
Somehow the idea of Kenny begging for something like this made a blush spread quickly across my cheeks and ears, which probably burned bright like a beacon. How to explain to this man that I had never done what he wanted me to do?
My question was answered almost immediately - like everything else in my interactions with Kenny, I didn’t have to tell him, he knew straight away. “That fucking asshole,” he let out a disgruntled huff, rubbing his face with his hand as if completely stressed.
“Excuse me?”
“Your damn boyfriend,” he immediately responded, huffing again as if the mere thought of that man made him angry, “Can’t even eat out his own fucking lady properly.”
“I never said…” Once again with all my damn defenses, but this time it was aimed at myself. I’d feel awkward admitting to Kenny that even though I was fairly experienced, what with the long-term relationship, I still knew very little about my own pleasure.
“It’s written all over your face, baby,” he said, gesturing towards my beet red features, his expression softening. “But it’s alright. You take a seat and enjoy the show. This is my shift.”
He then started playing with the hem of my dress, twirling it between his fingers, waiting for my next move. Slowly, but surely, I started scooting on my knees towards his face, turning my face away as I got closer to his mouth. As I finally got to it, my bare cunt hovering above his face, his arms wrapped around my thighs and started pulling me down as if he wanted me to fall on him - was this guy trying to have his neck broken? To stop him from actually succeeding in this endeavor, I lowered myself steadily to where my folds were touching his lips.
And he got to work right away. His tongue started by licking tentative stripes through my slit, capturing on it my already plentiful arousal - I could hear Kenny’s satisfied groans as he tasted it, but the front of my dress falling over his head shielded me from any facial expressions.
His fingers splayed on the soft flesh of my thigh tightened their grasp as he started licking and sucking faster, and I leaned forward, putting my hands on the floor near Kenny’s head for stability.
“Yes, Ken! More! Aaah!” I called out once his tongue picked up speed, tugging fistfuls of my own picnic blanket as my fingers tried to dig into the floor. Seemingly content with my feedback, he mumbled something against my pussy, as if trying to speak, but the only thing that was definitely caught by my senses were the vibrations against my folds, all the way to my core.
Then and there I realized that Kenny might be an actual genius. Whenever his tongue would lap at my clit, or make its way to fuck my cunt again, I’d feel the tiny piercing on top of it - and it increased my pleasure tenfold. The extra stimulation of the hard metal ball with his soft tongue had me seeing blank before my eyes with every quick successive movement, and he knew it too, because I could hear him groan as he’d purposefully lap and flick and curl with his tongue mercilessly.
Before I could catch myself, I was rocking my hips against Kenny’s face, trying to get more contact, more of anything he could give me. His jaw and tongue followed my movements perfectly, like he was well prepared for this exact reaction. My thighs were quivering from the pleasure he was giving me as well as the strain of the position while I tried not to completely fall on his mouth. It didn’t take much long for me to figuratively do exactly that, though; With a loud cry that probably scared every single animal in a radius across the forest, I came on his mouth, my hands grabbing a fistful of the grass under them while I rocked shamelessly against Kenny’s face, riding it through my release. I could feel his nails digging at the flesh of my ass, but he never made a movement to pull me away, eating me up like a man starved.
Once I started coming to my senses again and brought back enough strength to my thighs, I lifted myself up away from Kenny’s face slowly and hiked up the front of my dress, looking down to be able to see his face at that moment. He looked back at me through half-lidded eyes, his cheeks and nose sporting a reddish flush that definitely didn’t exist before. My juices are splattered all around his mouth and he has this massive stupid grin on his face, showing almost all of his teeth.
“Gorgeous.” He uttered once he saw me staring back, his voice raspy and lazy. I merely chuckled, going backwards on my knees until I was close to his hips, where I finally settled, lowering myself back down to sit right on top of the generous tent formed in his pants.
Kenny lifted his upper body up on his elbows once he felt me positioned against his still clothed cock. “Oh, aren’t we eager now?” He teased, patting the ground next to him. “Lay down here, baby. Let me sort that out for you.”
I shook my head with a smirk. “I don’t think I will. This is my shift now.”
His eyes widened, astounded, as I put both my hands on his chest and pushed him back down with full force of my arms. His head was still lifted as his back hit the ground, and I made sure to maintain our gazes connected as my hands drifted to his pants, unbuckling and unzipping them with dexterity.
“Are you sure?” Kenny inquired, his eyebrows arched, but I was positive I could see the faintest hint of a smile on the corners of his lips. “I mean, I’m all for it, but aren’t you tired?”
“I’m fine. I wanna do this.” I tug down his pants and boxers just enough to free his cock, rolling my hips a couple times over it just to see his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed hard. “Besides, it’s good thigh workout.”
“Not that you need it.” Kenny’s hands ran over my legs, giving my thighs a light squeeze. Once he saw my hand going towards his dick again as I prepared to take him inside of me, however, his grip released and his arm reached over somewhere. “Wait, wait, wait! Time out!”
I glanced confused to the side and saw Kenny dragging closer to us his parka, which had long been discarded to one end of our blanket, and he stuffed his hand inside of one of the pockets. “What is it?” I tried to ask, but he just rummaged around in it for two or three seconds more before bringing out a blue foil package.
So that’s why he needed to bring the damn jacket. “Someone’s well prepared.”
“I mean… Better be safe than sorry.” Kenny replied, handing me the tiny square. “Come on, I was about to hang out alone with the hottest chick in town. A guy can dream, you know?”
I twisted the wrapping between my fingers, analyzing the information in it. Average size - though that tells me next to nothing about what I’m really working with - and of the ‘Ultra Thin’ variety. This fucking guy. “You’re clean, right?”
“Oh yeah, absolutely!” He answered at record speed, nodding for extra emphasis. “But I mean… It’s for your best, right?”
I placed the condom right back on top of his parka. “I’m on the pill,” I reassured him as his face sported a totally confused expression, “So, if you’ll let me… I want to feel you, Ken. Really feel you.”
He swallowed hard again, his dick twitching with more precum leaking out of the tip as he took in my words. Still pleasantly surprised by my decision, he slowly nodded, closing his eyes and seemingly letting himself relax - though I could almost see all the little cogs in his brain moving wildly with all the lewd thoughts he had of me, and it made for great fuel to my ego.
My hand wrapped around Kenny’s cock again and I lifted my hips up to get in perfect position on top of it, moving the tip around my entrance teasingly, spreading his pre over it and getting it mixed with my own slick. When I finally slipped about an inch fully inside and my cunt gave one small initial clench around it, Kenny’s eyes shot open and he grabbed my thighs again, like he was fighting the temptation of pulling me down immediately.
“Tight… So fucking tight…” He grunted between gritted teeth, his dick twitching once again. His words like fire on my lower abdomen, I steadied myself over him before slamming my hips fully down and burying him to the hilt in one motion, both of us letting out loud groans as he stretched my walls with little preparation. Kenny’s nails dug at my thighs with this, leaving the tiniest crescent marks on them.
After a few seconds to adjust to his size - the longest seconds of my life - I lifted myself up agonizingly slowly before sinking back down again, trying to keep a slow and teasing pace, but failing miserably as I quickly began picking up speed and riding him in earnest. His enthusiasm matched mine, his hands on my thighs moving to my ass, feeling every jiggle and bounce of my flesh.
And that wasn’t the only thing of mine that bounced that he seemed interested in. Now that Kenny’s eyes were open, he basically zeroed in on the movement of my breasts, pupils glazed over with hunger. Determined to give him the show he was so interested in, I quickly removed the straps of my sundress from my shoulders and pulled down the neckline, so that my tits were on full display for him. That same stupid grin he had exhibited earlier showed up yet again.
“Mmmm… Like what you see, Ken?” I teased, brushing a wild strand of hair off his face with one of my hands, my soft touch lingering.
“Fuck yes,” one of his hands left my behind to knead at one of the perky mounds, “You’re perfect. Your boyfriend is a fucking-” I silenced him immediately with a particularly hard crash of my cunt on him. I needed not hear further from his mouth except for grunts or praise.
With every roll of my hips and slap of my skin against his, I wondered more why I took so long to surrender to him. My decision to let him hit it raw might have been irrational, but I didn’t regret it one single bit; He filled me up so perfectly, his length like the perfect massager to my inner walls, bringing me bliss like I hadn’t felt in quite a while. My hands grabbed and tugged at his shirt while I moaned with the full force of my throat, throwing my head back as his cock hit that sweet spot inside of me with every movement I made.
“Ken… Ken… Aaaah…” His nickname left my mouth like the chorus of an earworm song, ever present, the only thing I could think about in life. And I continued to say it over and over, making sure that it would permanently stick to his brain as well, my voice his only true companion even with the deafening music of the club he worked nights at.
“Hell yeah, baby,” he groaned between gritted teeth, “Let it out… You keep saying my name like that and I’m gonna lose my fucking mind here…”
Even if he said it like something that was yet to happen, lowering my gaze to Kenny’s face told me that he was already absolutely going* through it*. His eyes were tight shut and his eyebrows were furrowed, almost in a manner of deep concentration; He was trying his hardest to not finish before I did, and it was awkwardly endearing.
The pace of my hips slowed briefly as I lowered my upper body down towards Kenny’s chest, keeping balance by holding myself on my elbows bent to the sides of him. Once he’s not as overwhelmed with pleasure and felt the tip of my nose ghosting against his, he dared open his eyes to meet my caring gaze and soft smile. He immediately wrapped his arms around me and lifted his head from the ground just barely, his lips chasing mine, yearning for their velvety touch - which I granted them gladly, taking him in a luscious kiss as my hips slowly regained their previous momentum.
“Beautiful… Like a damn angel… Heaven’s got nothing on you…” Kenny whispered against my lips as soon as they parted from his, and those words on his voice made my heart skip a beat yet again - it was like he knew all the buttons to press to make me melt for him, even though we barely knew each other - but I knew that after all this I was definitely keeping him in my personal circle.
Our slight experiment with real affection didn’t last long, though. In my new position, my clit was making contact with Kenny’s skin and being stimulated with every movement I made; Soon I had to take my face away from Kenny’s to bury it in the crook of his neck as I moaned, feeling my orgasm fast approaching again from the combined effort on my pleasure spots.
My thrusts became shorter and even quicker as I felt my muscles tightening again, the upcoming climax threatening to consume me, with my thighs also trembling and burning from the straining ‘workout’. I continued grinding on him with wild abandon until I came on his dick with a shuddering cry of his nickname; the sun in the sky feeling almost cold in comparison to the electric warmth that coursed through every inch of my body, sparks of pleasure jolting through my muscles, making my cunt contract wildly around that man’s dick as if trying to make him a whole part of me.
As a tough roar reached my ears, the motion of my hips was abruptly interrupted by Kenny’s hands grabbing the sides of them and holding me firmly in place; He replaced my movement with his, bucking upwards in an intense burst of stamina as he now allowed himself to chase his own release. Given how long he had been holding back and how quick and powerful each of his thrusts were now, it doesn’t take long to catch up to him - soon his hips jerk up one last time and stay firmly in place, and I feel his cock twitching as it fills me up with jet after jet of his warm seed.
He stayed put like this for a while, with his hips raised to meet mine, the sounds of our heavy breathing the only thing audible in the little clearing at that moment. When I decided to make the first move and get up, Kenny’s softening dick sliding off of me and allowing his cum to start dripping down my legs, his arms fell to his side and he stretched his legs, letting out a deep sigh of contentment.
“Someone’s happy,” I commented with a smile as I laid down beside him, watching the sunlight hit his golden hair just right.
“Ya think?” Kenny responded with a rough chuckle, immediately wrapping his arm around me and pulling me closer so I’m resting on his chest with my legs draped over his. “Damn, baby… I’m never letting you go now.”
Coming down from my high, I expected all of the usual occurrences associated with descriptions of cheating you see in fiction to wash over me: Regret, sadness, anger at myself - or, if I was a narcissist, at this man for indulging me -, despair, maybe I’d even start running some excuses in my head. Absolutely none of these thoughts came to pass. Instead, as I laid on top of the picnic blanket soaking in the warm sun with a peaceful Kenny lazily petting my hair, I felt a sense of absolute bliss; After so many things that seemed wrong in my life for the past two years, I was finally having a moment where I’m certain something is right, and the definitive decision was made in my heart to never let it be otherwise again.
༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩♡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚
We unfortunately didn’t make it back to the restaurant before Kenny’s lunch break ended, which meant he’d probably get a scolding from his manager for being unpunctual. When I apologized for making him late, though, he didn’t seem the slightest bit worried about it - his boyish grin stayed on his face the whole time, and he was actually acting more mad about having to leave me and go back to waiting tables.
He did bring me inside of the restaurant through a door in the back and led me to the employee’s break room, where one of his colleagues had a charger I could borrow. I used it just enough to be able to call an Uber and have battery for the ride home, not wanting to overstay my welcome when Kenny was already on thin ice because of our escapade. Before I left, though, he still made sure to put his number on my contact list, under the pretext of ‘me sending him an album I mentioned earlier that he might like’; However, as he winked and blew me a kiss before being called over by one of the cooks to pick up an order that was ready, I knew music would not be one of our top 10 subjects in conversation.
Only two text messages were sent from my phone that night. One very long paragraph to my now ex-boyfriend, listing all the problems I had with our relationship with several examples and telling him to disappear from my life before blocking his number - not wanting to give him even the slightest chance to manipulate me - and deleting it for good. Another much shorter message, to a contact just named ‘🧡’, containing detailed information about my favorite drink in the whole world and telling him to have it ready by 10pm.
Dividers by
@cafekitsune
#south park#south park fanfiction#south park smut#south park x reader#sp x reader#south park fanfic#south park x y/n#kenny mccormick#sp kenny#kenny mccormick x reader#kenny x reader#kenny mccormick x you#kenny mccormick x y/n#kenny x y/n#kenny x you#ao3#x reader
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hiii! happy 200 followers!!!💓 i just wanted to drop by and say your latest prompts have been so good and spot on, super loved them!!
could i maybe request something inspired by taylor swift sunbaenim’s peace for idol!hoshi x non-idol!fem reader? if it doesn’t work them something a lil angsty with that pairing would be just fine as well! 🥹 thank you!!
thank you!!!! sorry this took a while 😭 also omg I love how perfectly peace suits hoshi I was so excited to write this! hope you like it <33
requests for 200 celebration post: open
our coming-of-age has come and gone suddenly the summer, it's clear i never had the courage of my convictions as long as danger is near
soonyoung knew what he was doing when he asked you out. well, at least he liked to believe he did. not one to care about the public backlash, he was one of the few who liked to live openly and talk about the people he loved. he knew there were a lot of negatives in this job; he also knew he wouldn’t trade it for anything. that was until he met you. you, who swept him off his feet like a hurricane and left him stranded in the middle of nowhere. someone he found himself looking for in every person he encountered. someone he was willing to fight against the world for. someone he never thought in a million years would say yes when he asked you out.
and it's just around the corner, darling 'cause it lives in me no, i could never give you peace
soonyoung knew no matter what he did to shield you, his life would catch up quickly. he knew all the possible dangers the dates held. he knew all the possible dangers you could have to face because of him: the stalking, the hating, all of it. he knew dating him came with this life, and for an outsider, it would never be easy. the long tours, the sneaking out— all of it. he knew from the start he could never give you peace.
but i'm a fire, and i'll keep your brittle heart warm if your cascade ocean wave blues come
still, a small, selfish part of him wanted you all for himself. he let himself indulge in the love you provided and hoped that his love for you was fierce enough to weather your stormiest days.
all these people think love's for show but i would die for you in secret the devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me would it be enough if i could never give you peace?
when the news of this affair broke, the first response was to believe that this was fake. a pr stunt. people questioned your love, the past, the present, the potential future. everyone felt the need to give their opinions, to advise him, to tell him what to do and what not to do. but no one ever asked him what he thought, nor what he felt for you. because if they did, he would have only one answer. “i would die for you in secret,” he told you on nights when your insecurities got the best of you and your anxiety made you fraught. he knew the details, the facts, the whole reality and retaliation it would come with, scared you to death. you were worried this was going to cost him his career, his future. and soonyoung was scared too, but what terrified him more was the idea of leaving you. of leaving this: the romance, the kisses, the touches, the peace. would it be enough if i could never give you peace? he asked himself every time he saw you smile in the safety of your home.
your integrity makes me seem small you paint dreamscapes on the wall i talk shit with my friends it's like i'm wasting your honor
a week after the news broke, you got to work. you asked soonyoung to let you talk to the management about posting a few videos. most of these were videos of soonyoung talking about how he loved his fans more than anything and asked them if they would release a statement. one where you’d be more than happy to answer any questions. he knew it wouldn’t fare well—these people had certain expectations from their idols, idols who prioritize them over their personal life. but still, your hope, your absolute sheer positivity when you said, "maybe we can change their mind," made him love you more. on a certain binge-drinking night with his members shit-talking about the industry norms, he thought of you and how he would never be half as brave as he is now if it wasn’t for you.
and you know that i'd swing with you for the fences sit with you in the trenches give you my wild, give you a child
soonyoung vowed that he would do everything possible to protect you if this went south. hell, he was even prepared to leave his career and move countries if it meant keeping you safe. he was going to have your back for the rest of your life the second you decided you were never leaving him. he dreamt of you one night: you, him, and a faint silhouette of a child running around a white picket fence house. and he wasn’t willing to give up on that dream just yet.
give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other family that i chose, now that i see your brother as my brother is it enough? but there's robbers to the east, clowns to the west i'd give you my sunshine, give you my best but the rain is always gonna come if you're standing with me
the day the videos were released, soonyoung asked your family and his to come over. he figured if things went south, it would be better to be surrounded by people who loved them rather than facing it alone. and soonyoung will forever thank the gods who decided to shine the suns of you because the people were more than moved by the videos. he knew they wouldn’t accept this right off the bat, but it was a start. soonyoung was more than happy with a start. he knew this wasn’t the first and would definitely not be the last storm you’d have to weather together. he knew that the rain would always drench you as long as you were with him.
would it be enough if i could never give you peace? would it be enough if i could never give you peace?
soonyoung knew he could never give you peace. and for the first time, he debated that it’s okay if he couldn’t. maybe the peace he so desperately chased for the two of you would always be the moment in between your chaotic life where you’d look at each other and feel nothing but bliss.
and for now, that would be enough.
#seventeen headcanons#seventeen imagines#seventeen reactions#seventeen scenarios#seventeen x reader#seventeen#seventeen fluff#svt imagines#hoshi#hoshi fluff#hoshi x reader#hoshi fanfic#hoshi x you#hoshi x y/n#kwon soonyoung#soonyoung x reader#svt soonyoung#soonyoung fluff#seventeen soonyoung#soonyoung scenarios#soonyoung imagines#soonyoung x you#soonyoung x y/n#soonyoung fanfic#soonyoung angst#hoshi angst#seventeen angst#woozisguitar: reqs#divider by cafekitsune#woozisguitar: 200f event
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ANI THOUGHTS HI IM HERE IM HERE
U want him to spank you because you’ve been so bad!!! teasing him all day!!! but he can’t hurt you too much because he loves you too much??? so after every spank he’s just absolutely tumbling out praises and saying how much he loves you and how you take him so well all the time that you’re confused as to whether this is a punishment or a reward because you’re about to cum just from him speaking to you thank you goodbye it’s late and I definitely have better ideas to present to you my monarch 🧎
send me dirty anakin thoughts <33
my monarch... stop no way i'm on my knees <33 i loved this and i'll definitely enjoy any other ideas you might have to giggle with me about!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
this post is 18+, minors dni.
no bc i'm all for absolutely depraved insane anakin but also there is something so special to me about anakin who's so tender and sweet and loving that he just can't fathom hurting you!!! but you've begged him, you tell him that if he doesn't want to he doesn't have to, but you're not going to be upset with him either way and you'd really like for him to spank you a little bit <33 after all that's why you've been so cheeky today? did he not notice? and he starts to flash back to all of the times you'd bent over in front of him or squeezed a little too far up his thigh and it clicks in his head he's like oh. that was you trying to get on my nerves.
but the thing is nothing you do could ever get on his nerves. he's not annoyed that he's half-hard in the middle of a council meeting, his robes cover it anyways and he's just so happy you had your hands on him in the first place. he's not upset that you flashed your cleavage at him and then left without letting him touch you, he's thrilled to have seen your tits at all <3 anakin is so desperate for you that literally no amount of teasing is ever gonna frustrate him it's all gonna be purely satisfactory, bless him <3
but he's willing to at least try spanking you because obviously you want it and he wants nothing more than to make you happy and make you feel good so he's ushering you into his lap so that you can perch on his thighs. he balances you kind of precariously where your ass is hanging off of his knees but you're leaning against his chest, and you're like ani wait i'll lay over your lap- and he wraps his arms around you and goes 'no. i want to hold you, angel, i want to kiss you. i want you near me.' and boy does that work wonders for the butterflies in your stomach!!! so you let him press his mouth to your own and kiss you so so soft and sweet and tender and loving while his free hand rubs gently over the skin of your ass that's hung off of his knees just enough to give him a big enough target. his first slap is honestly pathetic, more of a pat than anything, but he murmurs a sweet 'iloveyou' into your mouth and you grip at his tunic and beg him to do it harder
once he actually gets going, he's good at it. he sets a good rhythm, and always makes sure to rub your sore ass all nice and soft to soothe the stinging sensation of his palm later. but all the while he's spilling praises and compliments onto your tongue, speaking into your mouth and assuring you that 'you're perfect' and that 'you're the most beautiful thing he's ever seen' and that 'you're so good for me' and that 'i love you more than life itself''
it's so hard to stay perched on his lap like that!!!!!! you want him to be able to smack your ass more but your cunt is literally drooling onto his knees and they're offering you such firm, delicious friction when you grind against them that you want to lunge forwards and bounce yourself on his dick until you're both seeing stars <3 he definitely fucks you well after that, if you beg for him with big teary eyes he'll kiss away the moisture on your face and pacify you with his cock while telling you that you're perfect and he loves you <333
in future you always request that he uses his prosthetic hand to do it, because whether he's got his glove on or not it's so thrilling to feel either cool metal or cool leather against your ass <3333 butttt of course he uses his other hand too sometimes, because there's something undeniably filthy about the sound of his skin cracking against yours that he can't refuse.
#anakin skywalker x reader#anakin skywalker imagine#anakin skywalker scenario#anakin skywalker oneshot#anakin skywalker one-shot#anakin skywalker one shot#anakin skywalker headcanon#anakin skywalker headcanons#anakin skywalker hcs#anakin skywalker hc#anakin skywalker fanfiction#anakin skywalker fanfic#anakin skywalker fic#anakin skywalker blurb#anakin skywalker drabble#anakin skywalker dialogue#anakin skywalker fluff#anakin skywalker smut
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GUYS I SWEAR I'M TRYING TO FINISH SMUTMUS. I just can't stop myself from adding new things each time I try to enter the final editing stage 😭 I keep telling myself to save some bits for future stories, but fuck! It's getting too good for me to stop~ 😉 and then I get on here and get inspired to add something else, which throws me back a couple steps cause I'm trying to make sure it flows properly. SOMEONE TAKE AWAY MY PHONE- *gets smacked down*
Btdubs I've used the word "tongue" WAY too many times so if anyone could help me with synonyms or alternative ways to describe the tongue that'd be great 🥲
Be prepared though, once it's done and posted, I'mma take some time to respond to messages/comments/reblogs, catch up on some reading *looks at Hazel, Mink, & Danny* and write ESSAYS on every little detail! Yall might wanna put me on mute when that happens 🤣
I'll come back and add proper CW tags to all the teasers I release later, but for now (and just as a general rule of thumb with anything I post): MDNI! And jsyk, it WILL BE WORTH IT. I've doubled my word count from the original nine parts, and it's still growing. So. Y'know.
GET 👏 READY 👏 FOR 👏 10K+ 👏 WORDS 👏 OF 👏 ABSOLUTE 👏 FILTH 👏👏👏👏
Quickly, you turned your head and pushed yourself up. “No! No, I can…” you paused for a moment to stifle a yawn. The incident that led to all of this occurred near the end of your work day, so you were already fairly tired when this started. The unexpectedly hard orgasm wasn't helping any, but the promise of even more kept you going. Besides, you couldn't be the only one having fun here. That wouldn't be fair. “... I can keep going. I wanna keep going,” you insisted, lowering your leg as you pushed yourself up straight, turning to face him fully now. “For you.” You added, staring up at him with an amorous look that made his breath hitch in his throat for a moment. Cautiously, you raised your hands to gently cradle his face, standing on your tip toes so you could place a soft peck on his smiling lips.
Lowering yourself to stand proper now, you began to trace your hands down his neck and chest, not missing the way his muscles still tensed at your touch. It was going to take some time, you realized, to get him to a point where he welcomes your touch rather than shies away from it. You hoped that he would give you that time; outside of this incident that you so clumsily caused, of course. When your hands reached the waistband of his pants, you looked up at him and waited for his permission to continue - something small and near insignificant but nevertheless something he still appreciated. He would have to reward you for that later. Nodding his head, Alastor watched you as you slowly pushed both his trousers and briefs down past his hips, his aching cock springing from its prison and slapping lightly against his lower abdomen. He looked away for a moment, unable to hide his growing discomfort with being so bare in front of another person. Gently, you pressed on his jaw with your left hand to bring his narrowed eyes back to your face. “Hey,” you called. “You can trust me, Alastor,” you assured him, knowing full well that was only part of the problem. Mouth twitching, Alastor stared at you as you leaned in to place tender kisses to his chest, your eyes never once leaving his face as you lowered yourself to your knees before him. “I promise,” you spoke softly, hands tracing the defined muscles of his abs and gliding along the dips of his pelvic v. Bringing one hand down to rest on his thigh, your other gently wrapped around the base of his cock. Humming softly as you smiled up at him, you rubbed your cheek against his length, then grazed your lips over his leaking tip. “I just want to make you feel good,” you continued to assure him, not missing the shaky sigh he gave in response to your touches. Experimentally, you let the tip of your tongue dart past your lips and against his crying slit, his entire body tensing as one of his hands moved to tangle within your tresses while you continued to deliver kitten licks to his sensitive tip. You stared up at Alastor with such innocence in your big doe eyes; he had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from forcing his cock as far down your throat as it could go. “Is that okay?” You asked after a couple more licks to his slit. “Will you let me make you feel good, Alastor?” You asked him so sweetly, voice dripping with honey as his name rolled off your devilish tongue. You really knew how to push his buttons. With a drawn out moan vibrating through his chest, you barely had time to fully open your mouth as he pushed his hips forward and guided your head down until your nose brushed against the carmine strands at his base, his head tilting back at the long anticipated sensation finally washing over him as he breathed out a singular, “Yes!”
#smutmus#smutmus teaser#synamartia#alastor smut#alastor x reader#hazbin alastor#hazbin hotel#syn speaks#alastor x reader smut#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin hotel smut
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April Reading Recap
Stars of Chaos vol. 2 by Priest. I'm not quite grabbed by this one yet. I'm not not enjoying it, but the main relationship doesn't quite have me compelled, and the politics aren't quite sharp enough to get me either. I'm not totally sure I'll keep buying the published volumes, at least not at this time, and just read the rest online to see how I end up feeling about it as a whole before making the financial commitment.
Medea by Eilish Quin. Listen, I'm a Medea apologist, but I'm a Medea apologist who is very much of the "she absolutely did all the awful things she's accused of and she is valid" and the author here is going "she did all the awful things she's accused of but it's not as bad as you thought it was because she didn't mean it!" and I'm just. I'm not mad, just disappointed (again). I was so hoping for a book that would do something interesting with a Medea retelling but I probably should've known better than to think it'd be this one. Why, you may ask, do I keep reading myth retellings about my problematic faves when all I do is complain about them? Hope springs eternal, I guess.
She Who Became the Sun and He Who Drowned the World by Shelley Parker-Chan. Exceptional. Might be my favorite books I read in April. I'd already read She Who Became the Sun back when it was first published and knew I'd enjoyed it (was rereading to refresh my memory for the sequel), but I felt like I enjoyed it more the second time around, and I might've liked He Who Drowned the World even more than its predecessor. If you're looking for works of just-barely fantasy with delightfully fucked up queer characters, come get 'em here. I won't say most of them are happy (they're not) or that things end well (they don't), but boy is it good reading.
The Death of Jane Lawrence by Caitlin Starling. Decent horror but not particularly outstanding, in my opinion. I liked The Luminous Dead more.
Untethered Sky by Fonda Lee. I continue to struggle with novellas. This was a perfectly good novella but it felt like it could've been a stronger short story, which I guess is better than the other way I usually come out of novellas, which is "this was a fine novella but it should've been a novel."
The Mountain in the Sea by Ray Nayler. I really liked this. It has more of a thriller-ish edge than I expected, but for all that I think it's a thoughtful book with some interesting things to say, and I feel like it's one I want more people to read so I can talk to them about it. It's set in a sort-of spooky, near-future dystopia, but a lot of it is about, like, the nature of thought and consciousness. Anyway, I found myself compelled.
Islands of Abandonment: Nation Rebounding in the Post-Human Landscape by Cal Flyn. I found myself reading this thinking a lot about The World Without Us, a book I read many years ago and would kind of like to reread, and which I think I liked more than this (at least in my memory). I was hoping for more analysis than I got from this book, which was beautifully written but more nature/travel writing than science. One thing I did appreciate was the attention paid to the human cost of the "abandoned" places examined in this book - the pain that abandonment often signifies, and the trauma it indicates, in spite of the beauty that may come after.
Emperor of Rome: Ruling the Ancient Roman World by Mary Beard. I really liked the way that Beard chose to do this one - namely, taking it by theme rather than by emperor, and breaking down different areas of the emperor's life over time rather than trying to tell a linear narrative. It also let her do some of the better "skeptical" reading of sources that I've read in a popular book on ancient history, where she was actually digging into the "rather than what this says about what this person may or may not have actually done, what does it say about expectations, beliefs, and tropes that people had" kind of reading. And after some of the other popular histories of Rome I've read, thank god for that.
Metamorphoses by Ovid, trans. Stephanie McCarter. Continuing on with my "reading new translations (by women!) of classical epics" run (started with The Odyssey, The Iliad is on my list). It was fun to reread Ovid! As usual one of my favorite parts of this was reading the translator's note and introduction, and I wanted about 500% more of that through the text (tell me about the assonance you're preserving in the Latin!) but did get some of (thanks for the information on the penis/pubic hair puns!). Overall would recommend as a good translation of Ovid that very much does not flinch away from - and makes/keeps appropriately uncomfortable - the sexual assault.
Dark Rise by C.S. Pacat. Slightly more YA than I usually like, but I enjoyed it! I was a little :\ about it for a while, very much feeling the YA cliches of it all, but the late hour twist got me interested again, and I will be picking up the sequel. Did miss the full balls-to-the-wall iddy joy of Captive Prince, though, since I probably wouldn't have picked this book up without the author recognition.
Subversive Sequels in the Bible: How Biblical Stories Mine and Undermine Each Other by Judy Klitsner. I really liked this one, particularly for its commentary comparing and contrasting Eve, and the other women of Genesis, with later Biblical narratives. I don't know how much I buy all of her arguments when it comes to intentionality of all of the comparisons she's drawing, but it certainly makes interesting food for thought, and a good sampler for me of what literary-based Biblical scholarship can look like (and an indication that I'm interested in trying more of it).
Use of Weapons by Iain M. Banks. I read most of my way through this book continuing to really appreciate what Banks does with the Culture novels and planning to continue on reading the next one, but not enjoying this specific one as much as I did The Player of Games in particular, and then I got to the very end of it and went "hang on what the fuck???" but in a decidedly good way. And I'm still kind of thinking about That even though it's been a while, which I think is a positive. Anyway, I don't think I'd recommend this as a starting place for anyone to read the Culture novels, or as a must read, but it was on the upper end of a three star rating.
Juniper & Thorn by Ava Reid. I wanted this to be more gothic horror and less romance and it ended up being more romance and less gothic horror, was my feeling. Not necessarily the book's fault, but if anyone else is eyeing it wondering...now you know.
A Deadly Education by Naomi Novik. I really enjoyed this one! I was kind of skeptical going in - I'm not a big magic school person, as a rule, and the more I feel like something is hyped to me the more I tend to drag my heels about it - but Naomi Novik is really good at what she does and she clearly had a lot of fun here. It's tropey for sure, but I enjoy the narrative voice (very important, in a first person narration), and the action moves along with what I felt was pretty good momentum. The other thing I was worried about - that it'd feel too much like this was just ~commentary on/against Harry Potter~ without saying anything for itself - didn't materialize for me. I'm looking forward to reading the next ones.
The Monster Theory Reader ed. by Jeffrey Andrew Weinstock. I'm so rusty on my academic/theory reading and I felt it reading this collection, some of which was definitely better than others. Kristeva's essay on abjection was particularly rough as far as "I'm reading words and I know all the words but something about the order they're going in is just not making sense to me." Overall...it was a decent primer? There were a few very interesting essays in there; my favorite might've been the one on tanuki in modernizing Japan's folklore, but there were a couple on "monstrous" bodies that made me wish I had someone to discuss them with. That's probably my main problem reading academic works these days: I want a seminar to dissect them afterwards and I just don't have that.
The Sabbath: Its Meaning for Modern Man by Abraham Joshua Heschel. I'm trying to read something Jewish on Shabbat now and finally getting around to reading some Heschel after years of meaning to. I thought "oh, I'll start easy with something nice and short" - yeah, no, Heschel's got a very particular style of writing and there's a lot of theological depth packed into a very short volume. I'm looking forward to reading The Prophets, though.
The Husky and His White Cat Shizun vol. 5 by Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou. I think we're juuuuust about caught up now with the official translation to where I started reading the machine translation, so I'm very excited for (a) things I don't remember as well (b) reading it not in machine translation. Also looking forward to everything about what happened with Nangong Liu and Nangong Xu making more sense this time around, on account of not reading it machine translated, because I didn't follow it so well on my first read and I feel like I'm already doing better. (Though that could also be because it's a reread, no matter how different an experience of one.) Still feel real bad for Ye Wangxi, on so many levels. Mark that one down for 'characters I'd love to know more about what they're thinking.'
The Water Outlaws by S.L. Huang. I really enjoyed S.L. Huang's other work with the Cas Russell series, and I liked this book a little less than those. It felt like an almost winner, for me. Certainly I read through it quickly enough, and I can say I enjoyed it, but I'm not sure I'd give it an enthusiastic recommendation. It falls somewhere in the middle between "a fun action/adventure story" and "something I can sink my teeth into" in a way that didn't quite satisfy either itch. Still, it did make me curious about the source material, which is one of the Chinese classics (Water Margin) and I might go and find a place to read that, if I can; if I'd had that background going in I wonder if my experience of this work would've been more edifying.
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I'm currently rereading A Memory Called Empire so I can (finally) read the sequel (A Desolation Called Peace); I also checked out from the library the next two Scholomance books so I'll be reading those. I'm going to try to throw some nonfiction somewhere in there (maybe The Genius of Birds by Jennifer Ackerman, which I also have out from the library, but maybe something else), but I've still got the sequel to The First Sister sitting on my shelf (also from the library).
Outside of that I've got no big reading plans - I'm working my way through some of the unreads on my own shelf (despite what it may look like, about the library books) and eyeing The Doors of Eden by Adrian Tchaikovsky or a reread of Foundryside by Robert Jackson Bennett so I can continue that series.
#long post for ts#reading recaps#sometimes i read things#sometimes i wonder if i should have more like. summary information on what books are about#but i am lazy and also that's not really the point#important text posts
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Bridgerton folks, this is the end of this story. Thank you for all your support and encouragement! See you maybe tomorrow with a meme, definitely on Monday with Daddy!Colin (and I'll do also Pirate!Colin, and then starting on the 9th of December something really nice for the whole festivity period, so stay tuned...)
This is "5 times Colin Pen's first and one time she was his", enjoy!
(Moirin - post writing - would suggest a tissue... Fair warning)
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"We kissed. Bloody hell, me and Pen kissed. I had the courage to ask her and she admitted it was her first kiss because she was waiting for me. I'm still wrapping my mind about that. I am completely obsessed with her and she was waiting for me. How blind must I be to not see her sooner? And yet, she asked me to ask her again about the kiss. I did and she nodded. I've not kissed a lot of girls (and a couple of boys... A couple of times, just to know) but that kiss felt like a revelation.
I heard so many people saying that when you find the right one, you just know. I didn't understand. Until Pen and I kissed. Was this love?
Just in front of me this whole time?
And as the kiss deepened and we started making out, I could feel my heart racing and my heart spinning. She was there the whole time. "
They separated for a beat before going back for another one. And ohhh that might be a problem. Because now that he knows what Pen taste like, he is not sure he can go back.
Turns out they don't need to separate because Pen is right on the same page with him. He whispered against her lips "I don't think you can rid of me now, Pen" and her smile was the best thing he ever saw.
The Serengeti? Way overrated.
The lights of New York at New Year's Eve? They could not hold against Pen kissing him and smiling like that. "I was hoping you'd say that," she said and their hands slide together.
Suddenly he feels like a real idiot, because he knew that she was his way before. He was just on the cusp of puberty, when Pen took his hand for the first time and he knew at such young age. He knew with a certainty that he had lost somewhen over the years. He knew that could never been something else like this.
It took years all over the world and a couple (or more) dreams for him to rediscover that deep truth he knew all along.
He told her about that and Pen shed a tear. "I remember that day, it's when I knew I'd never love someone the way I love you," and fùck, wasn't he about to say the same thing?
Pen told him about an exercise her therapist ask her to do. To describe a day in her future. "I don't need to read it, I know by heart."
She told him of a marvelous day waking up cuddled with her husband ("that's you", she said and his heart somersault), the kids (another somersault) home from school.
A walk near the sea or by the lake after breakfast and then while the kids play she and her husband ("me, me, me" was thinking Colin) writing by their desk, trying to not get distracted by each other presence like so often happens (a wink on her side, oh... He can't wait to get to know that side of her soon). A nice lunch together and then going on a little adventure in the afternoon all together.
And at night, after supper ad putting the kids to bed, finally she ad her husband will have some time alone ("I left it vague here, but if you want to, I can give you a description of the night as well," and Colin must have died there).
"I like that day," Colin says, as she sheds tears of happiness.
"It never felt like a possibility, until now."
That deserved another kiss.
Their second kiss. And yet it still feel it like the first.
"I wonder if our kiss would still be the same thrill in 50 years," Colin says and she is absolutely convinced it will. Colin is sure too.
"A life for first with you, seems like the perfect life for me," she says again, and as he takes her hand and kiss her, Colin whispered on her lips "I could not agree more."
The end
#polin#bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#bridgerton s3#polin positivity#polin bridgerton#polin brainrot
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[★INTRO POST★]
Hello, page visitor. If you'd like to, please read this intro post. (And if you don't want to, that's fine, too)
QUICK FACTS:
Dseval || Adult || Artist
Contains: Sansshipping, Sans AUs, UTMV
May contain: Nothing too extreme. All will be tagged accordingly (so please block it if you're uncomfortable). So far: #cw ecto body, #cw smoking, #cw blood, #cw suggestive
DNI: Proshippers, Pro-Israel, Queerphobic, etc.
Requests/Asks are Open.
(i promised myself that after posting 10+ posts I will create an intro post idk why. Guys. Is this how tumblr works?)
!! These are always open
Unless stated otherwise. But this does not mean I will do/go along with everything.
Asks/Submissions (you can also ask and submit anonymously)
Art Suggestions
Art Trades (preferably by moots/friends)
✧Also, feel free to use my art for everything non-problematic. I'm okay with you taking inspiration or copying directly from my drawings. Or repost them. Just make sure to credit me— or better yet, tag me!
☆Accounts
2nd page: @dsevalyappuccino (for shitposts, reblogging, yapping, and lowres doodles)
Twitter acc: @/dsevalxdsx (there is actually nothing here, but it is open for DMs)
AO3: dseval (there is actually only one fic, don't expect anything in the near future)
Bluesky: dseval.bsky.social (not really active, but I post there sometimes, and I accept DMs)
For commissions and inquiries, feel free to message me anywhere or email [email protected]
☆General Info
✧ I am Dseval. (Pronounced dee-s-eval eval like in the word evaluation.) If you feel like it isn't a cute/short enough name for you— then you can call me Eva. Or call me whatever, I'll tell you If I dislike it.
✧ I draw. Occasionally I also code, make games. I also write fanfics (barely), and make music (barely).
✧ I won't reveal my age, but know that I am not a minor.
✧ I'm Queer. I'm okay with all pronouns, but They/Them is my personal favourite.
✧ I am not open for any relationships, in case you plan on asking.
✧ I am okay with dark topics, I love exploring them, but I do prefer wholesome things.
✧ I'm shy. As in, ☆super shy☆. So I may not post often and chicken out of conversations. Please do not be offended If I did that, you did nothing wrong.
✧ I did say I'm shy. But I also over-yap. I like friends. I'm accepting friends anytime anyday. On the topic of over-yap, I apologize If I ever said something that offended anyone. I am not very great at socializing.
✧ I also don't understand tone tags. So i apologise if I'm slow to get things.
✧ NSFW or suggestive is okay. But I don't really make these contents myself.
✧ I am OK with tagging. In fact, tag me in everything.
✧ Most of the time, I act on absolutely no reason and just because. Do not overthink my actions.
✧ I am not diagnosed (mental healthcare is very poor in my country). But I suspect I have Bipolar Disorder. I may have mood swings and be over-excited at times, or be too tired to response. I hope for your understanding.
✧ My favourite color is PURPLE, in case you can't tell.
☆ Expect:
Expect mostly Undertale Multiverse content, but to be more specific...
Drawings of Sans AUs
Sanshipping
Genderbending Sans AUs
Making my own AU (not speedrun)
Maybe other things, a list cannot list all of my interests
... All in my inconsistent artstyle.
However, feel free to also talk to me about Deltarune, My Little Pony, Evangelion, and Madoka Magica, and several gacha games. I am very deep into the lore of all of the above.
☆Interests
My favourite AU Sans' are Cross and Dust/Murder. (I also think they should kiss)
I am a multishipper, and my bar is very low so I swallow pretty much any content just as long as it is appropriate. Here are my favourites though:
☆ Cross x Dust, Cross x Dream, Color x Killer, Nightmare x Error, Horror x Farm, Geno x Reaper, Fatal_Error x Lavender
I absolutely eat those up, so if you know me and you know about these, please tag me in any related content.
☆If...
Do not interact with me If you are any of the following:
You are a proshipper/comshipper/darkshipper (or, whatever name you call yourself). I do not support that behaviour nor do I do condone it.
You are pro-Israel, Queerphobic, body shamers, pedophiles, zoophiles, etc.
You spread hate and harassment.
☆Tags
× General tags ( ꈍᴗꈍ)
#archiveverse (for my AU)
#dsevalanswers (for every asks that I answer)
#dsevalartreq (for every drawing requests I completed)
#kebaya skellies (for every drawing of any skeleton in kebaya)
#dsevalreblog (for reblogs interactions something just for me to visit later)
#gifts (for anything someone gives for me)
#dsevalyappuccino (for whenever I talk without posting art, this tag is also used by my 2nd acc @dsevalyappuccino)
× Event tags (´⊙ω⊙`)!
#dsevaldrsa15 (i put almost all AU Sanses into a spin the wheel program 15 times and then draw the wheel's picks for 15 days straight)
#intro post#will update if needed#archiveverse#dsevalanswers#dsevalartreq#kebaya skellies#dsevalreblog#dsevalyappuccino#dsevaldrsa15#<- for accessibility
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The Menendez Brothers Documentary
So I finally found the time to watch the Menendez Brothers documentary.
I'll begin to say how happy I am that Netflix knew to do a documentary to give Erik and Lyle the space to express themselves after "Monsters" was released. I also liked how they addressed the false events that the show was trying to display as the truth, the first example that comes to my mind is the documentary making it clear that even though there were rumours about it, the brothers never made an escape plan and never thought about escaping county jail.
The highlight of the documentary was of course having Erik and Lyle's perspective on everything after all this time. And it was truly heartbreaking hearing them talk about how the only thing they really wanted was to save the other one from José and Kitty, and that they each blame each other for the life that they have now.
I feel like some of you might expect me to talk about the prosecutor from the first trial (I don't remember her name sorry, not that it matters to me anyway) and I really don't feel like she deserves to be talked about, I'll just say that still having this much hatred 30 years after is genuinely crazy.
I was also surprised that the documentary wasn't addressing more of the abuse that the brothers suffered but in insight I understand why and it makes sense to me. Everyone knows by now what these brothers had to endure for most their lives, and I truly think that the main point of it was giving more context to their trial and explaining why today, despite everything, Erik and Lyle have been serving a life sentence without the possibly of parole. For that reason it was really nice to have jurors from both trials explaining what was happening behind closed doors. Because the reason why Erik and Lyle are still in prison today, and I cannot express how glad I am that the documentary made that point very clear, is because the justice system made it so. They made it so that the only thing the jurors could vote for was first degree murder, this is basically manipulating a jury that had no knowledge of the first trial, omitting clear context as to why the crime happened, which is absolutely insane and incredibly unfair.
Now I just wanted to say a few words about Leslie Abramson not wanting to be apart of the documentary. If at first I was disappointed I quickly understood how she must feels. I think it's safe to say that this case was probably the "case of her life", in the sense that she fought so hard and for so long for these brothers. She was the first to believe them and no one has ever fought for them like she did, and maybe no one ever will. And I found some people saying on TikTok (so it's not from me) that her statement probably meant that even if they were able to get out in the near future, they still lost more than 30 years of their lives in prison due to an unfair and corrupted justice system.
I'd also like to say a few words about everything that's going on regarding a possibility of them being free in November, I haven't done enough research on that yet to express myself properly about it so in the meantime I won't express myself on it on this blog until I am 100% sure of what I am talking about.
In conclusion I'll say that this documentary did its job of reestablishing the truth after "Monsters" and giving crucial context about their second trial and why it ended the way it did.
I hope you liked this mini review guys!
See you in the next post!
FREE THE MENENDEZ BROTHERS
#erik and lyle menendez#erik menendez#lyle menendez#monsters#monsters: the lyle and erik menendez story#ryan murphy#ahs murder house#american horror story#cooper koch#monster: the jeffrey dahmer story#nicholas alexander chavez#free the menendez brothers#menendez brothers#Menendez Brothers documentary#netflix#true crime
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What would your mirror verse Ivo think of eggman? He gives me the vibes he would be like that if not for feeling guilty about the eclipse canon
Oooo, this is an EXCELLENT question, one that I've already touched on in a future chapter of the mirrorverse. This unfortunately means I won't go too in-depth about how Robotnik feels about his counterpart here.
. . . but I will tell you that your latter assessment is absolutely correct.
My favorite thing in any sort of "shattered glass" or "evil mirror" trope is when the characters aren't totally foreign to their canon personalities. It's one thing to have a canon character react to someone wearing their skin but who's clearly not them. It's an entirely different, more angsty thing to have them grapple with a doppelganger who they very easily could have been, given a few wrong decisions or more unfortunate circumstances.
Mirror Shadow, for instance, is taking SA2 Shadow to his logical conclusion. The firing of the Eclipse cannon is a very clear Moral Event Horizon for Shadow as a character, after which point it would be damn near impossible for him to choose to do any sort of good afterwards. This was a line that our main timeline Shadow could have crossed, but he didn't. (And this was not a whim or moment of passion either- he very seriously considered committing the murder of the entire planet for a good chunk of SA2's plot.)
Mirror Robotnik is essentially the reverse of this- where Shadow completed his descent into villainy, this Robotnik had stayed in the shallow end of the pond. Removing Sonic from the equation of conquering a few islands for his own use leaves Robotnik in a far more advantageous position than main timeline Eggman. This Robotnik isn't rushed- he can spend as long as he wants perfecting his technology and working behind the scenes with governments and the like to assert his control. He certainly hasn't been pushed to the mad scientist, world-ending, obsessive extremes like Eggman has.
This Robotnik has been playing on easy mode.
. . . until his grandfather's greatest creation tricks him into helping blow up (half) the world, that is.
Still, there's a sanity to him that Eggman could never afford. Moreover, there is indeed that feeling of guilt that you've alluded to in your ask. Even in SA2, a mainline Eggman who has lost his marbles to the point of taking over a nuke cannon to hold the governments of the world hostage is horrified when Shadow reveals his plan to destroy absolutely everyone with no negotiation. This Robotnik, retaining even more of his moral compass, is even more horrified. This leads to some greater heroic action on his part than he'd ever consider normally.
Plus, it seems there's a benefit to playing into the hero role and having governments give you unlimited resources and funding. Robotnik, despite everything, prides himself on rolling with the punches and taking ever advantage he can get. He's always planning for what happens after this Ultimate Lifeform mess is taken care of, after all.
Finally, since this post is getting long, I'll leave you with this- it's always been a favorite headcanon of mine that main timeline Eggman still believes on some level that he is going to make the world a better place when he succeeds with his plans, even if he has embraced his supervillain persona in the mainline games. Now apply that to this mirror version of Robotnik, and you have a man who is utterly convinced he is doing the right thing and is therefore blind to any criticisms of his authoritarian and anti-environmental tendencies.
TL;DR: I have a thing for wanting opposite mirror counterparts to still act 'in-character'. The end.
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