#i'll absolutely be posting more in the near future

[digitalcarcrash]

is this anything

[mintjeru]

just a little update!! bc i feel like it

[gas-station-trackphone]

ftm trans Eddie Munson gets turned into a chew toy for hell bats and rescued in the 11th hour by his friends who don't know he's trans, who have to run some triage first aid and can hardly make sense of the blood and gore that used to be his body as they cut off his shirt and pants to get access to the worst of the wounds, who definitely aren't in their right minds well enough anyway to think of anything other than stopping the bleeding and getting him to a hospital, which they do, and miraculously Eddie finds himself blinking awake in a bright, fluorescent room feeling exactly like he imagines a chew toy for hell bats would feel in the aftermath which is to say: like shit. Even more miraculously, he finds hometown hero Steve Harrington posted up at his bedside with greasy hair (!!! Eddie never thought he'd see the day) and bags under his eyes.

The overwhelming relief on Steve's face when he sees Eddie is awake is touching, the misty eyes and cracking voice when he says god, i thought you were toast, man are downright flattering and, let's face it, giving Eddie all the wrong ideas that he figures he has an I-almost-died pass for at the moment so he rocks with it, let's himself indulge in the fantasy for a moment. Then, gradually, Steve's relief becomes more and more obviously some brand of deeply felt pity (or sympathy, but Eddie's never been good at distinguishing the two), which bursts his bubble enough to call him out.

"I know I look like what comes out the business end of a meat grinder, but I swear I'm good, dude. They definitely have me on the good shit, I hardly feel it. I'll be good as new in no time." Big fat fucking lie, by the way, but he'll say whatever if it gets that wounded puppy look out of Harrington's eyes.

"I...yeah, Eddie, I'm glad." And whatever it is he doesn't want to say, whatever is putting that you poor motherfucker look on his face, he's absolutely the opposite of subtle about it.

Eddie can hear the manifestation of his panic on the heart monitor.

"What? What is it? Is everyone- is Dustin-?" He can't say it, can't even think it, would rather be slowly torn to shreds all over again than know he failed at his one fucking task to keep the kid safe.

"No! I mean, yes, he's fine, they're all fine. Henderson's got a broken ankle and both of Max's arms are broken but the docs say they'll be fine in a few months with physical therapy."

The release of tension in Eddie's body hurts almost as much as the relief soothes him. "Okay then, what the fuck are you not telling me? It's fine, I'm a big boy, Harrington, I can take it."

He sighs, looking sick with it. "Eds...I don't know how to tell you this."

Oh god, what the fuck. Eddie's right back to freaking out because Steve looks inexplicably guilty, pained in the face like he's about to deliver the worst news he could imagine but if everyone's fine then-

"It's your dick, man. It's- it's gone. The bats-"

And Eddie laughs so hard he tears about a dozen stitches, immediately stops laughing, and throws up over the side of the bed and thankfully not all over his freshly reopened wounds as Steve shouts for help.

Eventually, when he's all stitched up again and barely hanging on to his hard earned lesson to not literally bust his gut laughing about the look on Steve's face (he has to force himself not to tell Wayne the specifics of how he ended up back in the OR, because he's absolutely gonna crack up and Eddie will definitely be unable to help himself from laughing with him), he realizes he's going to come out to all his friends in the very near future because holy shit, he has to tell everyone about Steve's utterly devastated expression at the news of Eddie's Ken doll-ification by way of demobat.

[pinkanonwrites]

Radio Chatter

NSFW BELOW THE CUT!

Knightverse Bumblebee/Human Reader, AFAB!Reader, GN Pronouns, First Time, Fluffy Smut, lots of sweet radio communication from Bee

Welcome to the first of my sporadic Kinktober Transformers fics I'll be posting over the upcoming month. If I run out of ideas I may take requests in the future, but for now I'm pretty well-stocked on concepts.

"Nngh…"

"Zrrrnn…?"

"I'm okay, I just… Need a minute to adjust."

"I'll be careful! -KZZSH- Take your time to get it!~"

Even sprawled out beneath his massive frame, spread achingly, impossibly wide by his spike, Bumblebee still found a way to make you laugh. Up until recently he had tried (and failed) to think very little about potentially interfacing with you. Mainly because he wasn't even sure if his "equipment", for lack of a better word, was compatible enough with you to really attempt anything. But the way his thick digits were finally able to caress your bare skin with a reverence he'd craved for far too long? It was currently making him wish he'd asked for this cycles ago. 

Warm metal fingertips traced featherlight along the jut of your collarbone and further down, mapping the rises and curves of muscles and bone in your body with a curious admiration. Bee's antennae flicked and fluttered with each new discovery, each dip and scar and freckle. But as he ran a hand down each of your sides, fingertips trailing over your soft squishy spots above your hips, you couldn't fully stifle your laughter.

His optics widened, digits scribbling back up and along your soft sides in the same area that had pulled that adorable little sound from your lips. You squeaked again, wriggling slightly beneath him as his servos squished into your plush skin.

"Bee! Hahahawahahait! I'm ticklish!" 

Ticklish. Of course, he himself was pretty sensitive around the transformation seams of his armor. But you didn't have any seams along your sides here, just soft, squishy warmth. Could humans be ticklish anywhere? He continued his poking and prodding, not enough to have you squealing like you were before, but enough for you to whine and wiggle beneath his grasp, powerless to escape him. Your chest heaved, whimpers and giggles you couldn't fully stifle eking past your smile even as you pawed weakly at his exploring digits.

"Plush, comfortable, and oh-so-soft! -KSSZH!- Can't take my eyes off of you… -KZZT!- Beautiful, just beautiful."

"Oh, Bee." Bringing your hands up to cup his helm, you pressed a languid kiss to the front of his mouthpiece. His antenna fluttered as he let out a pleased churr that rumbled through his entire frame. Even after you pulled away from the kiss he nuzzled further into you, tucking his faceplate as far into the crook of your neck as he could, absolutely thrumming with affection. Absent-mindedly Bee wished that humans could read EM fields as easily as Cybertronians did. Then you would be able to feel the palpable desire he had for you as more than just a static charge that put your hair standing on end. But he would have to settle with his frame and whatever words his love-addled processor could scrape up from the local airwaves instead. Not that you really seemed to mind either way.

He trailed his digits down your sides once more, fondling that particularly soft area right above your hips with just a touch more intensity. Your giggle sounded closer to a stifled moan this time as you squeezed around his spike, one hand cupping the back of his neck and toying with the cables at the base of his helm.

"Feels -ZZT- …good?"

You nodded frantically, gasping against his neck cabling as he shifted so, so slowly, spike dragging along your burning hot inner walls before pressing carefully back in. He had to be careful, the last thing he wanted was to risk hurting you. But still, your little fingernails scraping at his paint job and your wet, shuddering gasps made it near-impossible to keep any composure.

"Good, it's good. You're just so big."

He let out an all-too-pleased sounding chirp, antennae fluttering in amusement.

"Don't let that go to your head, I swear Bee." You tried to give him a disapproving look, but you just couldn't keep the smile off your face. So he nuzzled his faceplate further into you, staring up at you with big, hopeful, baby-blue optics.

"I'll make love to you, like you want me to…~"

That got you. You let out a strangled guffaw of laughter, cupping your hands over your mouth as you burst into giggles. He tittered with mechanical laughter as well: small, amused buzzes that you could feel down into the tips of your toes. 

"You dork." You gave him another kiss, this one pressed to the side of his helm. "Mmh, you're lucky you're cute."

He gave a questioning buzz. "Just -ZZT- cute?"

"Alright! And strong."

"Zrrrrr?" He made a vague, teasing vocalization with an upwards tick at the ends that only made you want to laugh more.

"And brave, and fast… and sexy?"

"Bingo, sweetheart! -KSSH- Right on the money!"

You held in your laughter this time, but the goofy, amused smile you had on your face made him feel like you were reaching both hands past his chest plating and cupping his spark directly in your palms. A near-overwhelming flood of affection surged through him as he curled his frame over your small, soft body, thrusting into your perfect heat. The punched-out moan you let out only spurred him further, both servos scooping you up from beneath and cradling you off the rough ground as he rocked into you.

"It must have been love…~ -ZRRT- And I can't fight this feeling anymore!~ -KZZST- I am not a smart man. But I know what love is… -ZZRT- …Am I talking too much?"

"Oh, Bee. No, no Bee. You're perfect." You cradled his face in your hands so gently, with such brimming, overwhelming care and kindness and love that Bumblebee was certain he was going to melt into a helpless pile of energon and cables and liquid metal beneath the warmth and affection in your gaze. "I love you too. I love you, Bumblebee."

He tried to vocalize, but it trilled up into a sharp, staticky wail as pleasure punched through him like a stinger shot. Frame shivering where he curled over your own, the feeling of his transfluid spilling into you seemed to be just enough to push you to your own release as well. He whined again as your nails scratched at his perfect paint. He knew you wouldn't be able to leave a mark, but Primus be damned if he didn't want them.

He kept you cradled in his grip even as his spike depressurized and you both groaned at the feeling of his fluids drooling from your aching core. You let out a startled 'Woah!' as he rolled over, placing you draped across his chassis with his hands cradled around your back to keep you close to him.

"Could've given me a heads-up." You joked.

"Heads-up." He parroted your own voice back to you, breaking into more amused buzzes at the scandalized look on your face and the teasing slap you gave to his hood.

"You're so lucky I love you."

"I love you." He parroted again, hoping the subtle expressions on his faceplate were as easy to read to you as your soft eyes and warm, dreamy smile was to him. It must have been, or you probably wouldn't have pulled him in for another kiss.

[lukolabrainrot]

Nicola's Easter Eggs from This Weekend/Week (and What it Could All Mean)

First, I am going to list the most important pieces of information (imo) that N posted on her IG grid or stories this weekend/week (and I will put the date it was posted- I'm on PST so some of these MIGHT have been posted on a different date for N):

Posted on N's stories on Friday, 8/9/24

Posted on N's grid on Saturday, 8/10/24

Posted on N's stories on Sunday, 8/11/24

This song was posted on N's stories on Tuesday, 8/13/24

Also, I want to stress I've been DEEP in delulu this weekend/week over all this because it's made me soo excited, but I analyzed the figure in the sunglasses from her milk tshirt pic for such a long time last night, and I swear... I am like 98% certain I see L's VERY distinct tattoo on the person in the sunglasses (and it's totally in the correct placement). I'll put the pic below. It helps if you zoom in a little bit. And after the song that she posted today, I am 99% certain at this point that L took that photo of her in the tshirt 😭😭😭 I could be wrong about the tattoo lol, BUT I still am almost certain that's him based on the arms!

What Could This All Mean??

I feel like we all have seen the theories at this point around all of these posts/stories, and the MANY Easter Eggs they all contain regarding L OR certain people adjacent to L. Therefore, I am not going to talk about all of the Easter Eggs and what they might be implying. This is what I will say:

If all of this content had not been released publicly in such a short period of time, I don't think I would really have paid that much attention to it, or have been THIS excited. However, it is precisely because N (who is VERY intentional on SM) posted ALL OF THIS in such a short period of time, knowing very well how the fandom would be interpreting it and leaving TONS of Easter Eggs that she's with L, that makes me fairly confident that there has been a VERY positive shift between L/N.

Could I be wrong? Yes. However, the song that she posted today (which I have ALWAYS loved btw 😍), clarified to me that everything she has posted since Friday wasn't just random. That song is a BIG statement! We know that N communicates through music, and this song's lyrics don't leave a lot to interpretation. It is a very sweet and happy love song! Now, could this song be about someone else, or could she just have liked the song and wanted to post it? Yes. But after EVERYTHING she posted on IG since Friday, NOBODY can convince me this song isn't about L!

I don't know what this EXACTLY means right now BTS for ALL parties involved in this situation. However, if L was going to officially acknowledge A as his girlfriend in the near future, would N have posted all of this content in such a short period of time that is very obviously related to L in the fandom? Absolutely not. I think (and a LOT all people might not agree with me on this) that this was an official acknowledgment to the fandom, specifically, that her and L are together currently and happily in love 😭😭😭 I still feel like the situation is probably a little complicated BTS, but something in my gut, based on all this public content the last few days from N, makes me feel like something BIG has changed between her and L, and N therefore feels more comfortable and confident with sharing this type of content with the fandom (and the public). I don't believe that we will get a lot of this type of content from L for a while (for LOTS of different reasons that I think are totally understandable), BUT we might get a couple of little crumbs from him (I'm thinking maybeee through songs). I also don't think they are in any place yet to go officially public, but I DO think that N will continue posting content like this if my theories are true 👀 I also feel like they may make a public announcement sooner than we expected based off of everything from the last couple of days. I have said this before, but I believe that both L/N are aware that this relationship would get serious pretty quickly if they were able to get on the same page. And I think they have 😭😍

Does this mean that L/A are done? I think so. Will we still see some material from A related to L? Maybe. I wouldn't rule that out. I get the sense though, and I have been feeling like this for a while, that L/A really haven't been doing that well in their relationship for a long time based on all the evidence that we now have.

A lot of people might not agree with all of my thoughts here, but I feel pretty confident that the song N posted today is a statement to the public, particularly the fandom, about her feelings currently for L. And it just makes my heart really happy 😍😍😍

[bumblebeehug]

When do u think Natsu actually realized that he fell for Lucy and i know he treats her differently but can u give moments where it's initiated from his side?

This is going to be a long post so buckle up!

Okay, first of all: the Phantom Lord arc. Though I don't think he fell in love with her at that point of time, I think it was the events that seriously solidified his partialness to her. I'd go into detail but I can already feel a long post incoming, so I'll keep it short: Lucy telling Natsu that she loves being a Fairy Tail wizard, while crying over the fact that she didn't want to leave ↓

After just trusting her life in Natsu, jumping from an insanely high tower, with a mere belief that maybe she had heard him in the distance – I think it struck a chord with Natsu. Like, it would be normal to cry after a fall like that, but Lucy wasn't concerned about that aspect. Her head and heart was all about the guild, how she didn't want to go, and that resonates with Natsu. Natsu's entire life at that point is 1) Finding Igneel, and 2) being with/protecting the guild.

Then I'd say it's a pretty gradual build in their relationship. They go on a lot of missions, hang out together, and just in general spend a lot of time connecting. There's some Natsu-saves-Lucy, some Lucy-saves-Natsu, some hand holding (tenrou arc I won't forget about that, thank you anime team for adding that scene), and then comes the next pivotal moment. GMG arc and the dragon festival that follows.

By then I'd say Natsu and Lucy are very much in this friends-with-emotional-benefit zone: much more than friends, absolutely not yet lovers. But with Lucy's near-death experiences in her battles, Natsu has to refrain himself from getting involved each time Lucy gets beaten up - he becomes helpless, and the worry that's sowed inside of him gets watered each time Lucy still puts his faith in him, still trusts him to come out a winner. That entire section when Lucy's in the infirmary and she tells Natsu that her entire being trusts that Natsu can do anything, I think that's when Natsu falls in love.

Now wait!! He still doesn't quite understand that he loves her. But he understands that his feelings for Lucy are more tender than any other feelings he's ever had. He treasures her in a new, heavier way. She's become precious to him.

Precious. Where have we heard that... oh >:) ↓

Now the Dragon Festival was LETHAL in a trillion ways, but especially for nalu fans. The whole Future Lucy plot and the forehead touches and the Future Natsu and Future Lucy fighting in a wasteland moments and the Natsu skipping the final GMG match to save Lucy. And of course. Future Lucy dying. It's not the first time we see Natsu get so heavily affected - it happened in the tower of heaven, when Erza was ready to give her life up. But it is the first time we see Natsu see a friend die. Like, a team mate, someone who he's responsible for bringing to the guild. And after the whole GMG conundrum? Had a single more bad thing happened Lucy during the dragon festival, he’d probably turn into a demon right there and then. Dare I even say: their relationship was the strongest at this point in time.

After the GMG and the Dragon Festival, we get the Sun Village arc (I don’t like the Eclipse celestial spirit arc so I’m not counting it, same with Key of the Starry Sky arc — technically some nalu moments but not exactly building imo) and then another big one: Tartaros. Ooooh brother, THE best arc of all times, wish Mashima knew how to replicate it. But alas, he doesn’t.

The Tartaros arc isn’t exactly a pivotal moment where Natsu “falls in love” but rather an important aspect to understand his later actions. Like this guy goes through some pretty grusome stuff, learns a lot of complicated, bad things about himself, and finishes off the arc with losing Igneel — his father that he's spent ages searching for. Natsu's entire life is turned upside down, so he decides that he has to become stronger: cue, he heads off for a year to train.

His time away isn't very elaborated on — not from Natsu's viewpoint or Lucy's. But I think it's understood that he chose not to bring along Lucy because she could be put into danger too much for him to be able to concentrate on building his strength: he knew his training would be dangerous. During this time we also have the Gildarts-scene in chapter (idk i can't be bothered to look it up but y'all know the one ↓) which is kinda debated on — who was Natsu talking about here?

I'm still not certain on if it was a heart to heart on the Igneel-matter, or if it was about his guilt of leaving Lucy behind, like many theorise. I'm not even certain that it's limited to one of them — he could be talking about both. But at the very least, this entire year was one of those "distance makes the heart grow fonder" moments for him. He wanted to get back to his normal life with Lucy so bad. After all, it wasn't like him showing up at the GMG was in order to meet Lucy — had he wanted more training after that, he'd head off again, but I don't think he could physically bring himself to do it, even if it hadn't turned out that the guild had disbanded. Though that's just me speculating a bit.

And about the guild disbandment: oh jolly, he was not happy. He had finally taken the step to grow stronger to protect everyone in his beloved guild, and here Makarov went and disbanded it? Leaving Lucy completely alone? Lucy, who once jumped from a hella high tower because she was just so devoted to stay in the Fairy Tail guild? Yeah, I think that broke him a little. At this point there was just so much guilt involved around his whole relationship with Lucy, because now he had put her through so much pain only because he brought her to Fairy Tail that day in Hargeon.

The next arcs I'd say Natsu's trying to spend his time redeeming himself for the countless things he's done bad (getting the guild back together, just generally staying by Lucy's side as much as possible). And naturally he keeps getting hit by challenge after challenge (it's not easy to be a book written by his immortal brother, yk?). And it's even harder to watch Lucy die again, this time for real (he thinks bc he's stupid and also has a tumour that's nothing less than a ticking bomb) (give this guy a break lol).

Anyways: Lucy's death nr2. Natsu can't live a life without her. Now I know — he still doesn't quite understand that it's romantic love, but I think he does understand that it's pure love. No matter if kissing and reproducing was involved, all he knew was that a life without Lucy is completely unimaginable, so blinded by rage he becomes and decides to decapitate everyone in his way (sorry about that Gray).

The last couple of moments I'll go out of my way to mention as signs of love is 1. when he's won over Acnologia and falls towards Lucy, crazy relieved, saying "I'm home", 2. Gajeel pointing out Natsu's crush on Anna, Natsu basically saying "oh that's why I like Lucy so much" (I embellished it lol) and 3. "We're still gonna be together from here on out, right?" yeah that man won't ever leave her. Ever. It's just not an option.

Now since I've only talked about specific moments, here's what I have to say about his relationship with her in general:

Throughout the main plot line, we also see a shift in Natsu's behaviour. Someone here on Tumblr pointed out that Natsu always finds a way to shield Lucy if something unexpected happens, after not being able to shield her from Future Rogue. There's also the small detail of the order he calls out to people - it goes from being pretty random, to Lucy almost alwyas being on the top of the list: likely because she's always on the top of his head. And in general I'd say that Natsu initiates (i'm adding this entire paragraph bc i realised that you asked about when Natsu initiated stuff, more than when he fell in love lol) almost all of their interractions. It's Natsu who wants Lucy to join Fairy Tail, to form a team, he's the one who enters her apartment constantly, he's always searching her out - his interest in her is at a constant high so we never feel like we get "moments" that he's paying her extra attention. He has one setting, and it's "Lucy" cranked to the max. Lol.

I could also add some HYQ moments to the mix here, but they've been few and far inbetween, and also mostly played off as jokes, so I can't really consider them as moments when Natsu initiates his love. I guess his jealousy can be considered a sign? And when (spoilers from the manga) he runs around to protect her/save her from creepy-freaky-jail (the only one who made it freaky was him, with those wild fantasies lol). Maybe I need to jog my memory a bit, but so far there hasn't been any non-pervy nalu moments initiated by Natsu in the HYQ, aside from jealousy-chap. Sadly.

Hope this gave you the answer you were hoping for! Sorry it took so long, I started writing on it and realised it would be a bible so I put it in my drafts to fetch some pics to make it less wordy, and then I forgot about it, lol. But here it is!

[daisybianca]

pairing: sebastian vettel x femalereader

summary: it's totally forbidden. he's older and your childhood and eternal crush, but there's more to that. his best friend--and your dad--is Michael Schumacher. one day, you're sick and stuck in your bed with a fever. he pays you a visit, and then the fever becomes even more brutal. HERE'S PART TWO.

warnings: sexual activities, jealousy, cursing words

(a/n): it's late at night, and I just wrote this, and I'm really, really sleepy. there might be multiple mistakes, grammar, and spelling, but HEY. the tension is still there! <3

IT HAD BEEN almost five days since everyone got informed that you were down with the flu. Michael Schumacher's beloved daughter was a concern about pretty much everyone in the paddock. Every single person cared deeply about you and Mick. Everybody knew that.

You got quite a few messages and texts from the drivers and team members in the past few days. You answered with polite, brief responses and made sure everyone knew you were just fine with the necessary drugs and medicine prescriptions.

The truth was that you had been feeling okay since a couple of days ago, but chose not to tell anyone. Rest on a bed all day was cool.

Opening your phone, you entered Instagram and wrote a brief thank you text to Daniel Ricciardo, who wished you a fast recovery. Scrolling through the app, you detected a post on your insta feed that was referring to Sebastian Vettell.

Oh, he was tour childhood crush.

Everybody freaking knew that.

You remembered that in an interview a few years ago with your father, a reporter had asked you whether or not you'd like to race for a F1 team and become a driver in the future. You response was fast and was definitely written in history. It almost immediately went viral, and people still talked about it on social media, leading to multiple fans shipping you and the famous world champion.

"No, I don't think I'm going to be a racing driver. But I'll marry one anyway, so it doesn't really matter." The spot played like a old cassette in your mind. A wide grin formed on your father's face and the reporter returned to you and lowered the microphone to reach your tiny height. You were barely 12 years old at that time.

"Who are you referring to? Lewis Hamilton? Do you like him, huh? British, humorous, handsome! He's totally so charming!"

"No, no, no, no!" Your father, Michael, bent over and picked you up in his strong arms. "I'm pretty sure the husband she's talking about is Vettell." He laughed again and you were so confused at the cameras and microphones and tons of people around you.

You were absolutely serious about craving to marry that man. He was something truly angelic to you, even though your innocent 12-year-old mind couldn't fathom how a real marriage worked.

"Oh, I get it! Blondes are better anyway!" The red-head reporter yelled and thanked you for the interview, before moving to the next driver.

You also remembered clearly the very first time you learned about Sebastian dating some girl.

A few of your dad's friends were gathered at your house, along with Sebastian. They talked about some weird strategies you couldn't analyze and had a great time together, but suddenly a question was fired at Sebastian, gaining your full attention.

"Seb, what's up with that blonde you've been going out with since last month?" A guy asked, and your gaze darkened. No one really noticed you eyeing the men behind the kitchen table. But that's what you wanted anyway.

"Who? Hannah? Oh, she seems okay, I guess." He took a sip from his bottle of beer and went on, his eyes lingering around the room. "She's hot, supportive and... not really smart but I don't mind, it's not like I'm going to marry her anyway."

They all laughed at Sebastian's words and you waited until most of the guys moved outside, near the pool in order to prepare the barbecue.

Approaching Sebastian, his eyes automatically landed up on you as he smiled.

"Hey, there, little one!" Sebastian greeted. You hated it when he called you little one. You were 17 at that time. In puberty and almost in adulthood.

"Don't call me that, Seb! I'm not 10 anymore!" You laughed and you got on your knees in front him, next to the couch.

He bent over and applied a peck on your forehead, just like he always adored to do. It was one of his special ways to show his platonic affection to you.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart." He smiled and got up, walking to the kitchen. He came back a few moments later and handed you an orange juice.

"I'd prefer the beer you're holding, thank you very much." You pushed the plastic carton of juice away and got up to grab the beer from Seb's hands. He tossed it away immediately.

"Your father would kill me, love."

Oh, love.

What a word to hear from his beautiful, full lips.

You bite your lips. Hard.

Your female hormones had been raging since a couple of years ago due to puberty. And Sebastian Vettel was so not helping with that.

You formed a fake sad face, and he sat to the couch again.

You'd love to sit in his lap right now. You used to do that when you were a little. You would wrap your hands around his neck... and stare at his baby blue eyes forever.

If the desire to sit in Seb's lap was a drug, you were totally and undoubtedly a drug addict.

But you couldn't do it now. Sebastian wouldn't let something like that happen.

A few moments later, you were sat beside him on the couch, drinking enormous sips from the juice Seb had offered you.

"It's tasty." You told him after you caught his gaze upon you.

"Um... I guess so."

You blinked a couple of times.

"Soooo... you have a girlfriend?" Your voice was steadier than you thought it'd come out.

"I don't know." He thought for a second. "It's complicated."

You automatically dragged the thin material of your cozy dress lower on your thighs when you caught his eyes traveling their for a tiny, brief moment.

"Are you in love with her?" You asked without hesitating and ignoring the previous incident.

"In love?" He repeated. "Jesus, no. I don’t think I've ever been in love before."

You didn't know if the scorching burning in your chest was a good thing. You were glad he hadn't been in love with anyone before, but simultaneously you weren't.

"Have you?" Sebastian's question caught you off guard.

"Who? Me?" Yes, you wanted to yell at him. But didn't. "No. I'm almost 17 and barely had any experiences in my love life."

"That's not certainly a bad thing." He mumbled, drinking from his beer, his lips almost immediately absorbing the liquid.

Germans loved beers. Sebastian Vettel was no exception to that rule.

"What? Having zero experiences in that area?" You asked.

It wasn't like you hadn't been kissed before. You had. Twice. By two different boys. But nothing compared to the love life other teenagers had the chance of experiencing at your age.

"Yes. It's a good thing, to say at least." His eyes were so threatening. Like there was a hidden meaning behind them.

But maybe it was just something your mind created due to the fact that... this man... oh, Gosh... you had never desired anything or anyone like him.

"Why?" You looked at him and his gaze found yours.

"You should wait for the right one." He smiled simply.

You looked at him and wanted to say that he was all you wanted. But you fucking couldn't. And that was drowning your feelings for him in deep, dark oceans.

"The heart wants what it wants." You pronounced, and Seb didn't quite get your words.

He didn't want to anyway. He knew damn well that your feelings about him were intense since you were a little kid.

The obsessed, recless, lovesick teen. That's what you thought Seb would describe you as. Little did you know he had the exact opposite opinion of you.

Seb was your frustration.

He thought you were like a daughter to him at that time. Little did he know you'd do anything to keep your promise in the future.

Bottled-up feelings. Intense feelings, unexplained issues. He caused that to you. All of it. And he didn't even know.

°•°

You were almost 19 now.

Age was by your side and the age gap between you and Seb wasn't that intense. Only 11 years. You had met multiple couples before with even bigger age difference and they lived with it in happiness and with pride.

Closing your eyes, you inhaled a big breath.

You felt greedy, insatiable.

Seb continued being pretty much the number one reason why you still had a good opinion of the masculine sex but you were careful and avoided showing it to everyone anymore. Paparazzi and the media always tended to make things even bigger.

It was just a few minutes before noon when a knock on the door sounded like a thunderous lightning in your sensitive ears. You hadn't communicated with a singe soul in a couple of days because you wouldn't risk infecting anyone else with the virus, even though you already feeling extremely better.

Beforing bothering to hear you climbing out of the bed, a familiar figure of a male swung the door open and closed it sat afterwards, swaying the keys in his hands.

"Seb?" Your voice was weak as you got out of the coziness of your bed and approached the door. "How the hell do you have my keys?"

The German man turned to you and gestured to be sat on the bed once again, as if you were so fragile and threatened to break just because of a silly virus. Sebastian was so dramatic. But you didn't. complain as you gained your soft spot on the mattress again because his white button-up shirt blurt your thoughts and your vision. He had rolled the light fabric on his wrists, highlighting even more his rough hands.

"I asked Mick to lend them to me so I could pass by here and check up on my favorite girl."

His words buzzed in your ears.

What did he just say?

He used to call you random nicknames, some of them cute and others... kind of silly, but 'my favorite girl'?

That was too much for your complicated mind to analyze.

Sebastian sat down opposite of you.

As he faced you and said absolutely nothings, his state felt scorching. Like a burning flame, attempting to read your thoughts, which were too hard to be hidden between the curtains of your eyelashes.

You had always known he could read you like an open book. And you always hated that exceptional ability of his.

Sometimes, he could unearth thoughts in you that no one else could. Not even your father, nor your brother, and sometimes not even you...

"How are you feeling, (y/n)?" His soft smile faded, blue, intense eyes focused on you, eyeing you from head to toes as if he could detect any physical pain just by observing your body.

"How do I look?" You fired back, without hesitation.

You didn't mean to sound flirtatious at all. But... oh, well, the look on Sebastian's face read something entirely different...

You were kind of mad at him that he chose to pass by your apartment without calling or messaging you first. You tried to make him gather that without saying it, but your tone didn't come out the way that you wanted it to.

"If you ask me, you don't look ill at all." Sebastian crossed his arms, his veins popping out of the white fabric. "You look... I don't know..." He gave in, eyes traveling everywhere in the room but you.

You felt a warm wave of air coming your way from the opened windows, so you chose to unzip your thin cardigan a little bit more. Your grey sweatpants were too hot for you at the moment, but the idea of changing into something more loose didn't occur to you earlier.

"Sebastian, I look like a fucking sloth that's been eating leafy greens, rice and pasta for five days in a row!" You laughed but the blond man didn't seem to be amused by your humorous comment. When you faced his cold state, your expression transformed into something more serious. "Why didn't you call before visiting?"

"The answer is too simple and you're too smart to even ask." He shrugged, annoyed. "Because I know you wouldn't let me come."

You hadn't seen Sebastian like that never before. He seemed... different. He always used to laugh with you, enjoy some movies, play video games or boarding games with you for fun...

But now...

He looked so changed and you can't understand why.

"Why wouldn't I let you come, Seb?"

He took a deep, deep breath before answering. "Because you're just as stubborn as me. I wouldn't let you come and visit me while I'm sick either. Even though you--"

Your phone buzzed with a notification on the nightstand, causing Seb's speech to come to a hault.

Another notification popped up and the screen illuminated once again.

One more and then another one...

You stretched your whole body and grabbed your device. Glancing at the screen, you read five unanswered messages from Lando.

This guy tries to catch up with you always when the time isn't right.

Sebastian got up from the chair near your desk. "Who is it?" He asked, trying to keep the coolness in his tone.

"A friend."

"Is it Norris?" Seb snapped.

You instantly looked up from your screen. "How the hell do you know Norris texts me?"

Sebastian smirked and took a seat close to you on the bed. But he was still too far. You needed him closer to make you forget about your frustration with him.

"A spend three quarters of my day with your brother."

"Oh, Mick, you're such a traitor." You muttered to yourself as you shoved your phone under the sheets.

"He just cares about you. We all do." Seb seemed to hesitated for his upcoming words. "You'll always be our best girl."

Our?

Fuck. It felt like he tried so hard to hide his thoughts.

But they say that the eyes are the window to your soul.

"Seb, are you flirting with me?" You shot, keeping your voice calm and steady.

"You want me to stop?" His answer was instant, causing your entire body and face to redden.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

You'd been waiting for this moment almost 20 years and now... that it was finally happening, you didn't know what to do.

"No," you muttered. "But I expected you to do something more than that. You were always the brave one, remember?"

Whatever it took to fulfill your eternal dream.

Seb stood up and did something you never expected him to do. Even though every part of you craved this moment to come in many dreams.

He kneeled in front you.

Fuck.

His blue eyes were the most beautiful thing you had ever seen. "Seb, what are you--"

"Open your legs for me, love." He murmured, looking up at you with his fingers genrly pressing on your bare thigh.

You felt your cheeks redden. Again.

It felt insane how instant your body's reaction was to his words and touch. As if it had a mind of its own.

Seb's voice forced you back to reality when you realized you stared at him speechless. "I won't repeat myself."

You shivered and opened up your legs for him, welcoming his warm and long fingers.

"You won't kiss me?" Your voice was barely audible.

"I'm not going to make it that easy for you, babe."

"W-what do you mean?"

A smirk appeared. "I suppose you'll have to beg for it."

♡♡♡

Part 2.

[ddejavvu]

ANI THOUGHTS HI IM HERE IM HERE

U want him to spank you because you’ve been so bad!!! teasing him all day!!! but he can’t hurt you too much because he loves you too much??? so after every spank he’s just absolutely tumbling out praises and saying how much he loves you and how you take him so well all the time that you’re confused as to whether this is a punishment or a reward because you’re about to cum just from him speaking to you thank you goodbye it’s late and I definitely have better ideas to present to you my monarch 🧎

send me dirty anakin thoughts <33

my monarch... stop no way i'm on my knees <33 i loved this and i'll definitely enjoy any other ideas you might have to giggle with me about!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this post is 18+, minors dni.

no bc i'm all for absolutely depraved insane anakin but also there is something so special to me about anakin who's so tender and sweet and loving that he just can't fathom hurting you!!! but you've begged him, you tell him that if he doesn't want to he doesn't have to, but you're not going to be upset with him either way and you'd really like for him to spank you a little bit <33 after all that's why you've been so cheeky today? did he not notice? and he starts to flash back to all of the times you'd bent over in front of him or squeezed a little too far up his thigh and it clicks in his head he's like oh. that was you trying to get on my nerves.

but the thing is nothing you do could ever get on his nerves. he's not annoyed that he's half-hard in the middle of a council meeting, his robes cover it anyways and he's just so happy you had your hands on him in the first place. he's not upset that you flashed your cleavage at him and then left without letting him touch you, he's thrilled to have seen your tits at all <3 anakin is so desperate for you that literally no amount of teasing is ever gonna frustrate him it's all gonna be purely satisfactory, bless him <3

but he's willing to at least try spanking you because obviously you want it and he wants nothing more than to make you happy and make you feel good so he's ushering you into his lap so that you can perch on his thighs. he balances you kind of precariously where your ass is hanging off of his knees but you're leaning against his chest, and you're like ani wait i'll lay over your lap- and he wraps his arms around you and goes 'no. i want to hold you, angel, i want to kiss you. i want you near me.' and boy does that work wonders for the butterflies in your stomach!!! so you let him press his mouth to your own and kiss you so so soft and sweet and tender and loving while his free hand rubs gently over the skin of your ass that's hung off of his knees just enough to give him a big enough target. his first slap is honestly pathetic, more of a pat than anything, but he murmurs a sweet 'iloveyou' into your mouth and you grip at his tunic and beg him to do it harder

once he actually gets going, he's good at it. he sets a good rhythm, and always makes sure to rub your sore ass all nice and soft to soothe the stinging sensation of his palm later. but all the while he's spilling praises and compliments onto your tongue, speaking into your mouth and assuring you that 'you're perfect' and that 'you're the most beautiful thing he's ever seen' and that 'you're so good for me' and that 'i love you more than life itself''

it's so hard to stay perched on his lap like that!!!!!! you want him to be able to smack your ass more but your cunt is literally drooling onto his knees and they're offering you such firm, delicious friction when you grind against them that you want to lunge forwards and bounce yourself on his dick until you're both seeing stars <3 he definitely fucks you well after that, if you beg for him with big teary eyes he'll kiss away the moisture on your face and pacify you with his cock while telling you that you're perfect and he loves you <333

in future you always request that he uses his prosthetic hand to do it, because whether he's got his glove on or not it's so thrilling to feel either cool metal or cool leather against your ass <3333 butttt of course he uses his other hand too sometimes, because there's something undeniably filthy about the sound of his skin cracking against yours that he can't refuse.

[synamartia]

GUYS I SWEAR I'M TRYING TO FINISH SMUTMUS. I just can't stop myself from adding new things each time I try to enter the final editing stage 😭 I keep telling myself to save some bits for future stories, but fuck! It's getting too good for me to stop~ 😉 and then I get on here and get inspired to add something else, which throws me back a couple steps cause I'm trying to make sure it flows properly. SOMEONE TAKE AWAY MY PHONE- *gets smacked down*

Btdubs I've used the word "tongue" WAY too many times so if anyone could help me with synonyms or alternative ways to describe the tongue that'd be great 🥲

Be prepared though, once it's done and posted, I'mma take some time to respond to messages/comments/reblogs, catch up on some reading *looks at Hazel, Mink, & Danny* and write ESSAYS on every little detail! Yall might wanna put me on mute when that happens 🤣

I'll come back and add proper CW tags to all the teasers I release later, but for now (and just as a general rule of thumb with anything I post): MDNI! And jsyk, it WILL BE WORTH IT. I've doubled my word count from the original nine parts, and it's still growing. So. Y'know.

GET 👏 READY 👏 FOR 👏 10K+ 👏 WORDS 👏 OF 👏 ABSOLUTE 👏 FILTH 👏👏👏👏

Quickly, you turned your head and pushed yourself up. “No! No, I can…” you paused for a moment to stifle a yawn. The incident that led to all of this occurred near the end of your work day, so you were already fairly tired when this started. The unexpectedly hard orgasm wasn't helping any, but the promise of even more kept you going. Besides, you couldn't be the only one having fun here. That wouldn't be fair. “... I can keep going. I wanna keep going,” you insisted, lowering your leg as you pushed yourself up straight, turning to face him fully now. “For you.” You added, staring up at him with an amorous look that made his breath hitch in his throat for a moment. Cautiously, you raised your hands to gently cradle his face, standing on your tip toes so you could place a soft peck on his smiling lips.

Lowering yourself to stand proper now, you began to trace your hands down his neck and chest, not missing the way his muscles still tensed at your touch. It was going to take some time, you realized, to get him to a point where he welcomes your touch rather than shies away from it. You hoped that he would give you that time; outside of this incident that you so clumsily caused, of course. When your hands reached the waistband of his pants, you looked up at him and waited for his permission to continue - something small and near insignificant but nevertheless something he still appreciated. He would have to reward you for that later. Nodding his head, Alastor watched you as you slowly pushed both his trousers and briefs down past his hips, his aching cock springing from its prison and slapping lightly against his lower abdomen. He looked away for a moment, unable to hide his growing discomfort with being so bare in front of another person. Gently, you pressed on his jaw with your left hand to bring his narrowed eyes back to your face. “Hey,” you called. “You can trust me, Alastor,” you assured him, knowing full well that was only part of the problem. Mouth twitching, Alastor stared at you as you leaned in to place tender kisses to his chest, your eyes never once leaving his face as you lowered yourself to your knees before him. “I promise,” you spoke softly, hands tracing the defined muscles of his abs and gliding along the dips of his pelvic v. Bringing one hand down to rest on his thigh, your other gently wrapped around the base of his cock. Humming softly as you smiled up at him, you rubbed your cheek against his length, then grazed your lips over his leaking tip. “I just want to make you feel good,” you continued to assure him, not missing the shaky sigh he gave in response to your touches. Experimentally, you let the tip of your tongue dart past your lips and against his crying slit, his entire body tensing as one of his hands moved to tangle within your tresses while you continued to deliver kitten licks to his sensitive tip. You stared up at Alastor with such innocence in your big doe eyes; he had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from forcing his cock as far down your throat as it could go. “Is that okay?” You asked after a couple more licks to his slit. “Will you let me make you feel good, Alastor?” You asked him so sweetly, voice dripping with honey as his name rolled off your devilish tongue. You really knew how to push his buttons. With a drawn out moan vibrating through his chest, you barely had time to fully open your mouth as he pushed his hips forward and guided your head down until your nose brushed against the carmine strands at his base, his head tilting back at the long anticipated sensation finally washing over him as he breathed out a singular,  “Yes!”

[veliseraptor]

April Reading Recap

Stars of Chaos vol. 2 by Priest. I'm not quite grabbed by this one yet. I'm not not enjoying it, but the main relationship doesn't quite have me compelled, and the politics aren't quite sharp enough to get me either. I'm not totally sure I'll keep buying the published volumes, at least not at this time, and just read the rest online to see how I end up feeling about it as a whole before making the financial commitment.

Medea by Eilish Quin. Listen, I'm a Medea apologist, but I'm a Medea apologist who is very much of the "she absolutely did all the awful things she's accused of and she is valid" and the author here is going "she did all the awful things she's accused of but it's not as bad as you thought it was because she didn't mean it!" and I'm just. I'm not mad, just disappointed (again). I was so hoping for a book that would do something interesting with a Medea retelling but I probably should've known better than to think it'd be this one. Why, you may ask, do I keep reading myth retellings about my problematic faves when all I do is complain about them? Hope springs eternal, I guess.

She Who Became the Sun and He Who Drowned the World by Shelley Parker-Chan. Exceptional. Might be my favorite books I read in April. I'd already read She Who Became the Sun back when it was first published and knew I'd enjoyed it (was rereading to refresh my memory for the sequel), but I felt like I enjoyed it more the second time around, and I might've liked He Who Drowned the World even more than its predecessor. If you're looking for works of just-barely fantasy with delightfully fucked up queer characters, come get 'em here. I won't say most of them are happy (they're not) or that things end well (they don't), but boy is it good reading.

The Death of Jane Lawrence by Caitlin Starling. Decent horror but not particularly outstanding, in my opinion. I liked The Luminous Dead more.

Untethered Sky by Fonda Lee. I continue to struggle with novellas. This was a perfectly good novella but it felt like it could've been a stronger short story, which I guess is better than the other way I usually come out of novellas, which is "this was a fine novella but it should've been a novel."

The Mountain in the Sea by Ray Nayler. I really liked this. It has more of a thriller-ish edge than I expected, but for all that I think it's a thoughtful book with some interesting things to say, and I feel like it's one I want more people to read so I can talk to them about it. It's set in a sort-of spooky, near-future dystopia, but a lot of it is about, like, the nature of thought and consciousness. Anyway, I found myself compelled.

Islands of Abandonment: Nation Rebounding in the Post-Human Landscape by Cal Flyn. I found myself reading this thinking a lot about The World Without Us, a book I read many years ago and would kind of like to reread, and which I think I liked more than this (at least in my memory). I was hoping for more analysis than I got from this book, which was beautifully written but more nature/travel writing than science. One thing I did appreciate was the attention paid to the human cost of the "abandoned" places examined in this book - the pain that abandonment often signifies, and the trauma it indicates, in spite of the beauty that may come after.

Emperor of Rome: Ruling the Ancient Roman World by Mary Beard. I really liked the way that Beard chose to do this one - namely, taking it by theme rather than by emperor, and breaking down different areas of the emperor's life over time rather than trying to tell a linear narrative. It also let her do some of the better "skeptical" reading of sources that I've read in a popular book on ancient history, where she was actually digging into the "rather than what this says about what this person may or may not have actually done, what does it say about expectations, beliefs, and tropes that people had" kind of reading. And after some of the other popular histories of Rome I've read, thank god for that.

Metamorphoses by Ovid, trans. Stephanie McCarter. Continuing on with my "reading new translations (by women!) of classical epics" run (started with The Odyssey, The Iliad is on my list). It was fun to reread Ovid! As usual one of my favorite parts of this was reading the translator's note and introduction, and I wanted about 500% more of that through the text (tell me about the assonance you're preserving in the Latin!) but did get some of (thanks for the information on the penis/pubic hair puns!). Overall would recommend as a good translation of Ovid that very much does not flinch away from - and makes/keeps appropriately uncomfortable - the sexual assault.

Dark Rise by C.S. Pacat. Slightly more YA than I usually like, but I enjoyed it! I was a little :\ about it for a while, very much feeling the YA cliches of it all, but the late hour twist got me interested again, and I will be picking up the sequel. Did miss the full balls-to-the-wall iddy joy of Captive Prince, though, since I probably wouldn't have picked this book up without the author recognition.

Subversive Sequels in the Bible: How Biblical Stories Mine and Undermine Each Other by Judy Klitsner. I really liked this one, particularly for its commentary comparing and contrasting Eve, and the other women of Genesis, with later Biblical narratives. I don't know how much I buy all of her arguments when it comes to intentionality of all of the comparisons she's drawing, but it certainly makes interesting food for thought, and a good sampler for me of what literary-based Biblical scholarship can look like (and an indication that I'm interested in trying more of it).

Use of Weapons by Iain M. Banks. I read most of my way through this book continuing to really appreciate what Banks does with the Culture novels and planning to continue on reading the next one, but not enjoying this specific one as much as I did The Player of Games in particular, and then I got to the very end of it and went "hang on what the fuck???" but in a decidedly good way. And I'm still kind of thinking about That even though it's been a while, which I think is a positive. Anyway, I don't think I'd recommend this as a starting place for anyone to read the Culture novels, or as a must read, but it was on the upper end of a three star rating.

Juniper & Thorn by Ava Reid. I wanted this to be more gothic horror and less romance and it ended up being more romance and less gothic horror, was my feeling. Not necessarily the book's fault, but if anyone else is eyeing it wondering...now you know.

A Deadly Education by Naomi Novik. I really enjoyed this one! I was kind of skeptical going in - I'm not a big magic school person, as a rule, and the more I feel like something is hyped to me the more I tend to drag my heels about it - but Naomi Novik is really good at what she does and she clearly had a lot of fun here. It's tropey for sure, but I enjoy the narrative voice (very important, in a first person narration), and the action moves along with what I felt was pretty good momentum. The other thing I was worried about - that it'd feel too much like this was just ~commentary on/against Harry Potter~ without saying anything for itself - didn't materialize for me. I'm looking forward to reading the next ones.

The Monster Theory Reader ed. by Jeffrey Andrew Weinstock. I'm so rusty on my academic/theory reading and I felt it reading this collection, some of which was definitely better than others. Kristeva's essay on abjection was particularly rough as far as "I'm reading words and I know all the words but something about the order they're going in is just not making sense to me." Overall...it was a decent primer? There were a few very interesting essays in there; my favorite might've been the one on tanuki in modernizing Japan's folklore, but there were a couple on "monstrous" bodies that made me wish I had someone to discuss them with. That's probably my main problem reading academic works these days: I want a seminar to dissect them afterwards and I just don't have that.

The Sabbath: Its Meaning for Modern Man by Abraham Joshua Heschel. I'm trying to read something Jewish on Shabbat now and finally getting around to reading some Heschel after years of meaning to. I thought "oh, I'll start easy with something nice and short" - yeah, no, Heschel's got a very particular style of writing and there's a lot of theological depth packed into a very short volume. I'm looking forward to reading The Prophets, though.

The Husky and His White Cat Shizun vol. 5 by Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou. I think we're juuuuust about caught up now with the official translation to where I started reading the machine translation, so I'm very excited for (a) things I don't remember as well (b) reading it not in machine translation. Also looking forward to everything about what happened with Nangong Liu and Nangong Xu making more sense this time around, on account of not reading it machine translated, because I didn't follow it so well on my first read and I feel like I'm already doing better. (Though that could also be because it's a reread, no matter how different an experience of one.) Still feel real bad for Ye Wangxi, on so many levels. Mark that one down for 'characters I'd love to know more about what they're thinking.'

The Water Outlaws by S.L. Huang. I really enjoyed S.L. Huang's other work with the Cas Russell series, and I liked this book a little less than those. It felt like an almost winner, for me. Certainly I read through it quickly enough, and I can say I enjoyed it, but I'm not sure I'd give it an enthusiastic recommendation. It falls somewhere in the middle between "a fun action/adventure story" and "something I can sink my teeth into" in a way that didn't quite satisfy either itch. Still, it did make me curious about the source material, which is one of the Chinese classics (Water Margin) and I might go and find a place to read that, if I can; if I'd had that background going in I wonder if my experience of this work would've been more edifying.

--

I'm currently rereading A Memory Called Empire so I can (finally) read the sequel (A Desolation Called Peace); I also checked out from the library the next two Scholomance books so I'll be reading those. I'm going to try to throw some nonfiction somewhere in there (maybe The Genius of Birds by Jennifer Ackerman, which I also have out from the library, but maybe something else), but I've still got the sequel to The First Sister sitting on my shelf (also from the library).

Outside of that I've got no big reading plans - I'm working my way through some of the unreads on my own shelf (despite what it may look like, about the library books) and eyeing The Doors of Eden by Adrian Tchaikovsky or a reread of Foundryside by Robert Jackson Bennett so I can continue that series.

[justthemis124]

The Menendez Brothers Documentary

So I finally found the time to watch the Menendez Brothers documentary.

I'll begin to say how happy I am that Netflix knew to do a documentary to give Erik and Lyle the space to express themselves after "Monsters" was released. I also liked how they addressed the false events that the show was trying to display as the truth, the first example that comes to my mind is the documentary making it clear that even though there were rumours about it, the brothers never made an escape plan and never thought about escaping county jail.

The highlight of the documentary was of course having Erik and Lyle's perspective on everything after all this time. And it was truly heartbreaking hearing them talk about how the only thing they really wanted was to save the other one from José and Kitty, and that they each blame each other for the life that they have now.

I feel like some of you might expect me to talk about the prosecutor from the first trial (I don't remember her name sorry, not that it matters to me anyway) and I really don't feel like she deserves to be talked about, I'll just say that still having this much hatred 30 years after is genuinely crazy.

I was also surprised that the documentary wasn't addressing more of the abuse that the brothers suffered but in insight I understand why and it makes sense to me. Everyone knows by now what these brothers had to endure for most their lives, and I truly think that the main point of it was giving more context to their trial and explaining why today, despite everything, Erik and Lyle have been serving a life sentence without the possibly of parole. For that reason it was really nice to have jurors from both trials explaining what was happening behind closed doors. Because the reason why Erik and Lyle are still in prison today, and I cannot express how glad I am that the documentary made that point very clear, is because the justice system made it so. They made it so that the only thing the jurors could vote for was first degree murder, this is basically manipulating a jury that had no knowledge of the first trial, omitting clear context as to why the crime happened, which is absolutely insane and incredibly unfair.

Now I just wanted to say a few words about Leslie Abramson not wanting to be apart of the documentary. If at first I was disappointed I quickly understood how she must feels. I think it's safe to say that this case was probably the "case of her life", in the sense that she fought so hard and for so long for these brothers. She was the first to believe them and no one has ever fought for them like she did, and maybe no one ever will. And I found some people saying on TikTok (so it's not from me) that her statement probably meant that even if they were able to get out in the near future, they still lost more than 30 years of their lives in prison due to an unfair and corrupted justice system.

I'd also like to say a few words about everything that's going on regarding a possibility of them being free in November, I haven't done enough research on that yet to express myself properly about it so in the meantime I won't express myself on it on this blog until I am 100% sure of what I am talking about.

In conclusion I'll say that this documentary did its job of reestablishing the truth after "Monsters" and giving crucial context about their second trial and why it ended the way it did.

I hope you liked this mini review guys!

See you in the next post!

FREE THE MENENDEZ BROTHERS

[dseval]

[★INTRO POST★]

Hello, page visitor. If you'd like to, please read this intro post. (And if you don't want to, that's fine, too)

(i promised myself that after posting 10+ posts I will create an intro post idk why. Guys. Is this how tumblr works?)

!! These are always open

Unless stated otherwise. But this does not mean I will do/go along with everything.

Asks/Submissions (you can also ask and submit anonymously)

Art Suggestions

Art Trades (preferably by moots/friends)

☆Accounts

2nd page: @dsevalyappuccino (for shitposts, reblogging, yapping, and lowres doodles)

Twitter acc: @/dsevalxdsx (there is actually nothing here, but it is open for DMs)

AO3: dseval (there is actually only one fic, don't expect anything in the near future)

Bluesky: dseval.bsky.social (not really active, but I post there sometimes, and I accept DMs)

For commissions and inquiries, feel free to message me anywhere or email dsevalxdsx@gmail.com

☆General Info

✧ I am Dseval. (Pronounced dee-s-eval eval like in the word evaluation.) If you feel like it isn't a cute/short enough name for you— then you can call me Eva. Or call me whatever, I'll tell you If I dislike it.

✧ I draw. Occasionally I also code, make games. I also write fanfics (barely), and make music (barely).

✧ I won't reveal my age, but know that I am not a minor.

✧ I'm Queer. I'm okay with all pronouns, but They/Them is my personal favourite.

✧ I am not open for any relationships, in case you plan on asking.

✧ I am okay with dark topics, I love exploring them, but I do prefer wholesome things.

✧ I'm shy. As in, ☆super shy☆. So I may not post often and chicken out of conversations. Please do not be offended If I did that, you did nothing wrong.

✧ I did say I'm shy. But I also over-yap. I like friends. I'm accepting friends anytime anyday. On the topic of over-yap, I apologize If I ever said something that offended anyone. I am not very great at socializing.

✧ I also don't understand tone tags. So i apologise if I'm slow to get things.

✧ NSFW or suggestive is okay. But I don't really make these contents myself.

✧ I am OK with tagging. In fact, tag me in everything.

✧ My favourite color is PURPLE, in case you can't tell.

☆ Expect:

Expect mostly Undertale Multiverse content, but to be more specific...

Drawings of Sans AUs

Sanshipping

Genderbending Sans AUs

Making my own AU (not speedrun)

Maybe other things, a list cannot list all of my interests

... All in my inconsistent artstyle.

However, feel free to also talk to me about Deltarune, My Little Pony, Evangelion, and Madoka Magica, and several gacha games. I am very deep into the lore of all of the above.

☆Interests

My favourite AU Sans' are Cross and Dust/Murder. (I also think they should kiss)

I am a multishipper, and my bar is very low so I swallow pretty much any content just as long as it is appropriate. Here are my favourites though:

☆ Cross x Dust, Cross x Dream, Color x Killer, Nightmare x Error, Horror x Farm, Geno x Reaper

I absolutely eat those up, so if you know me and you know about these, please tag me in any related content.

☆If...

Do not interact with me If you are any of the following:

You are a proshipper/comshipper/darkshipper (or, whatever name you call yourself). I do not support that behaviour nor do I do condone it.

You are pro-Israel, Queerphobic, body shamers, pedophiles, zoophiles, etc.

You spread hate and harassment.

☆Tags

#archiveverse (for my AU)

#dsevalanswers (for every asks that I answer)

#kebaya skellies (for every drawing of any skeleton in kebaya)

#dsevalreblog (for reblogs interactions something just for me to visit later)

☆PFP hall of fame

In chronological order, from left to right. Only includes previous PFPs.

[holybibly]

Hi! I’m sort of a new bunny so I was wondering if there was any specific nicknames you’d like us to call you, apart from the ones on the recent post.

Also is there specific days for sending requests? Just checking.

Can wait to read whatever spicy posts you write next!

Hello my cute little bunny. Welcome to our little depraved house. I hope you feel loved here, my darling.

First of all, I don't have a special nickname for you to call me. You can choose whatever you feel comfortable with. You can call me by my name - my name is Valerie (as a reminder for anyone who somehow missed it) or you can choose your own special nickname for me. All my bunnies have their own way with me and will choose what is most desirable and comfortable for them.

Secondly, requests are always open. I give answers to the Unholy Hours whenever I want.

Answers to the Sugar Weekend will only be given on Fridays until Monday mornings.

Let me remind you that Sugar Weekend is a softer and more comfortable mud.

The Unholy Hours have already hit the bottom of hell with their depravity and lust.

You can always send me requests for any of these segments.

I think I'll end up creating a master list for Unholy Hours and Sugar Weekend, as all my answers turn into mini-fanficks. Sorry bunnies, I absolutely cannot write anything short.

Every time I sit down to write, my brain literally says: "Let's write a whole novel."

I also don't have a release schedule for my main full-length works. It all depends on my work (I'm my own sugar daddy, unfortunately) and my inspiration.

In the near future I will be updating the master list to include upcoming work.

I love you bunnies.

[yankstrash]

goodbye, old friend

liked by gabeperreault44, _willsmith2 and others

amelia.ln: the first of the hardest goodbyes 🖤 you've pissed me off, you've driven me crazy and most importantly, you've stolen many homework answers from me. but i would take all of those for just one more school year of us all together.

smit, i can honestly say i've never had a friend like you. and i know now you're asking yourself, "meels, do you mean this in a good way or a bad way?" and the answer is yes.

while i won't miss sitting next to you in english class every monday, wednesday and friday (lie), i will miss knocking your ice cream cone in your face and our post hockey game wobbles on the dance floor

save me a night club dance in sj and i'll save you some grammar pop quiz answers in bos 🫡

i'm so lucky to be your friend. ❤️ i'm proud of you and all you're going to do. see you in the very near future, buddy.

love you always, xo meels <3

view 178 comments

grumpy.boldy: k i'm crying.

aram_minnetian: making me real emotional meels.

gabeperreault44: there was truly nothing better than watching my best friend and my favorite girl become the best of pals 🥲 even when it was to plot against me ..

↪️ amelia.ln: oh we didn't do it THAT much

↪️ gabeperreault44: ...right, sure.

_willsmith2: my go to person when i needed an ear to yap off 🫶🏻

_willsmith2: i'm going to miss you tons, even if i didn't always act like it... so glad i have found a pal for life 🤝 thank you for all the english class help, i couldn't have survived without you, truly.

↪️ amelia.ln: yeah yeah i know.

_willsmith2: love you tons meels ❤️

↪️ amelia.ln: love you smit 🥹🫶🏻

ryan.leno_4: the end of an era...

↪️ amelia.ln: HUSH. NOW.

jacob_fowler24: best squad ever 🫶🏻

_willvote: favorite will smith memory, go.

↪️ amelia.ln: has to be either singing karaoke on my birthday or teaching him how to boogie board over spring break

↪️ gabeperreault44: two solid choices.

↪️ grumpy.boldy: def boogie boarding.. i have never seen someone so athletic eat so much shit by nothing other than ocean waves.

↪️ eliana.brielle: PLS

↪️ _willsmith2: 😑 this is why i'm leaving.

↪️ amelia.ln: @ _willsmith2 shut up.

emmafohrr: *sigh* guess i have to transfer to fill the void 😔 (😏)

↪️ schulzyy_: no.

↪️ amelia.ln: YES YOU DO

↪️ grumpy.boldy: DO IT

↪️ eliana.brielle: YES YES YES YOU CAN HAVE WILLS SPOT ON THE MOVIE COUCH!!

↪️ _willsmith2: UM????

↪️ amelia.ln: @ _willsmith2 you're leaving, you have no say.

drewf2: the absolute best friend group bc has ever seen

coleeiserman: whew, that makes my job a lot easier next year.

↪️ colehutson23: likewise.

↪️ amelia.ln: you're still going down in the battle of comm ave.

↪️ coleeiserman: see you there?

↪️ gabeperreault44: @ coleeiserman count your days, kid. count your days.

[the---hermit]

Garden gnome diary

This is just a random list of thoughts, tips and things I am learning as I am keeping a vegetable garden for the first time. I thought it would be fun to write down some things, and maybe what I learn can be useful for others too? I do have a bit of experience gardening, but I only even had herbs that don't need as much attention as a veggie garden does. At the moment my veggie garden has been up for a couple of months more or less, the weather hasn't been kind this year since it's been raining most days for the past few months. I'll probably make more posts like this and random updates in the future.

Starting small is always the best option. This year i decided to plan tomatoes, zucchini and some salad, and after the salad I planted will been eaten I won't plant any more because it was a failure. The combo of heavy rain and slugs has not been kind to it, so I decided that my energies for this year will be focused on the other veggies and that's okay. It's not something I can focus on full time, so having fewer plants to look after is good for me to learn. create habits and not feel overwhelmed.

No matter how little you plan to stay in the garden, or how small the task you will get dirt on yourself, so dress accordingly.

On the same note, having comfortable clothes that you are okay with getting dirty is a game changer. I have a pair of old shoes I don't really wear out anymore so those have become my gardening shoes. And most importantly I have a pair of trousers with lots of pockets that have become my gardening uniform. They are super comfortable, they are light so even if it's very hot I am not suffering too much and I still get total coverage so I can sit down, and avoid as many mosquito and other insects bites as I can.

Moreover I know summer is hot and the temptation to wear a sleaveless top is there, but the more skin is out the more bites you get, so for the love of god wear a baggy tshirt (note made by someone will regret wearing a tank top in the garden for the next week)

Also a pair of well fitted garden gloves is necessary and will become your absolute best friend. I always struggled to find gloves that were small enough for my hands, and when this year I finally did it made everything so much better.

Cleaning out the weeds that grow around the veggies you have planted makes up for most of the job. It's very annoying especially because they grow so quickly and take so much time to clean up. I recommend having an audiobook or a nice playlist on while doing this job because it really makes the time fly. Having a bucket or something to put them as you are plucking them will save a lot of time.

Also since you often have to pluck the weeds out by hand in between the plants find a comfortable position. Sit down, however you are most comfortable, because it will take so much time and you cannot afford to give yourself backpains just because you didn't want to get dirt on your trousers. I somethings almost lie on the ground because it's comfortable and I don't care if my neighbor sees me looking like an idiot half laying in the dirt. I accept myself as a creature of the garden and I couldn't care less if others think I'm weird.

The real enemy is not the weeds (tho they are so annoying) it's slugs. Keeping the garden clean of weeds and everything makes it easier to spot them, but especially when it's been rainy I recommend looking around, under plants and all and remove the little bastards before they ruin everything. I live near the woods so i just gather all the slugs and leave them in the woods near my house in the hopes that some hedgehogs will eat them.

Related to that I have been trying to get hedgehogs to move in/near my garden for a while. Last year I saw a few nearby so I am keeping it up, but leaving a couple of small pile of leaves and weeds (yep that's where all the weeds go) so they can sleep under there if they want to. And I also leave out the snails for them.

I finally understand why the steretypical old man with a garden is so grumpy, and it's all because of the snails trying to eat my salad, and the behated cats the people living nearby leave out that think my garden is their toilet. If you listen closely you can probably hear me curse like a sailor about that.

Writing down on a calendar when it rained and when you watered your plants is going to make things so much easier. I have terrible memory, my brain cannot remember these things.

If you have to build some sort of supportive structure like I did for the tomatoes, for the love of god find ways to make the edges of the structure as safe as possible. I am so clumsy and if it weren't for the precautions I built in the structure and the fact that I am always wearing a baseball hat I would have hurt myself so many times. The baseball hat basically just hits things before I do, or before I accidentally stab myself in the eye with something, because I am a fool and I will walk into stuff.

I don't think this is necessary but here goes nothing, for the love of god wear sun protection.

[ri-writes-if]

I can’t wait to choose the demonic appearance!!

Will it be like a race option or completed customizable??

Sorry if this has been asked before, I couldn’t find it

The choice will be in the next chapter! I'll be making "introductory" posts with the possible forms in the near future, though 👀

I thought of making forms customizable, but I liked the idea of set forms—they have history/lore, more characteristics/details I can play with, and I think it'll be easier to code too. So (sadly?) the forms will be set choices. But they're fun, I promise!

Thank you for the question! It'd be absolutely fine even if already was asked before.