#i'd actually appreciate it if you were to scream at me

[delicris]

loss of innocence

i longed for more purple in my life for violets and pastel skies the sun rays breaking through an amethyst wisterias embracing the garden gate i longed for more purple in my life until the purple started turning green then yellow took over slowly and left just a memory behind i longed for more purple in my life but over the years i learned the only natural purple i was allowed to see stemmed from the insides of this house the one with the lilac façade

[purple-babygirl]

yours to hurt, yours to love

Pairing: (dom)!Bucky Barnes x (sub)!f!reader

Word count: 8,050

Summary: They had a deal. She would surrender her control; he would take it. Love had no place in such a relationship, did it?

Warnings: 18+ Content: friends with benefits, blowjobs, lots of cum, cum eating, cum in pussy, unprotected vaginal intercourse (don't do that), mentions of cheating, angst, crying, dom x sub dynamics including a sir kink and the use of puppy as a petname, BDSM features including begging, following orders/instructions, mentions of ropes, being tied/suspended, mentions of edging and overstimulation and the use of toys, ass whipping with a belt, mention and use of a safeword, chocking, two insecure idiots being in love, metal arm kink, fingering, rubbing of cock on pussy, multiple orgasms, aftercare. Let me know if I missed anything.

A/N: this is a self-indulgent fic I wrote simply because I wanted to read and now it's finally done so I'm sharing it with you, babies:"💜💜 I just started at a new job and it's very tiring and energy and time consuming so I thought I'd post something before I get swept up in the real world of numbers and targets and not being broke. I really hope you like this one and I love you all with every bit of me💜

~

As most one-night stands start, they had met at a bar.

She was sitting all alone with her palm hugging a beer bottle, her face carrying the saddest look. She had turned down every guy that had tried to approach her that evening.

Bucky had been watching her all night, lost in deep thought as she barely raised the warming bottle to her lips, the melancholic look marring her features never leaving.

She had only smiled once that night, and it was for Bucky.

She was snapped out of thought when a louder song abruptly came on, startling her back to reality and that was when she saw him.

The most handsome man she had ever laid eyes on had his eyes on her from the other side of the crowded nightclub, and she found herself smiling at him.

He quickly turned his gaze away, suddenly shy that he was staring.

She wanted to ignore the man, telling herself she had a lot on her plate already, that it would likely be a mistake to go talk to him; that she needed to keep her distance from men for a while at least. But she couldn’t. She couldn’t ignore him.

Even with his back to her, his presence was too strong to simply be ignored.

So she disregarded her minds’ screams and went to talk to him.

Bucky almost chocked on his drink when he saw that it was her who had approached him, but he managed to compose himself.

“Were you ever planning on talking to me?” She teased with a smile as she sat down next to him at the bar.

And just like that, they were talking.

They talked about anything and everything, the deepest things as well as the silliest.

She was so easy to be around and she actually made the man laugh.

She had no idea, but Bucky didn’t think he had even cracked a smile in weeks.

Before she could decide what was right and what wasn’t, she had her lips on his, and before he could overthink it, Bucky was taking her back to his place.

It has been a long time since the man had had the chance to like someone, and he liked her even more when she didn’t make him feel bad about himself that night.

The metal arm didn’t faze her.

She didn’t ask intrusive questions or even let her gaze linger. She treated it just like his other arm, wrapping both around her back as she straddled Bucky on his couch, making out with him like she has been waiting for him her whole life.

But that wasn’t the only reason Bucky appreciated her so much that night.

She had gotten on her knees for him, both of them fully naked at that point, her boobs swaying lightly as her hand pumped his hard cock, lubing him up with his pre-cum.

Her hands were magic and he didn’t want to tell her that he was too close to exploding just from her soft hand palming his tip.

She had barely gotten Bucky in her mouth when he had started cumming all over her.

The sight of his fists clutching the couch, mouth open as groans left his chest while copious amounts of cum covered her mouth, chin, neck and boobs had her wetness dripping down her bare thighs.

When he was back on earth again and his vision was no longer black, Bucky started apologizing profusely when he realized what had happened.

He had come way too fast. All over her. Without her getting to finish even once. He didn’t even get to touch her down there.

Bucky thought she was definitely going to leave.

“It’s okay,” she said with a kind smile as her clean hand caressed up and down one of his thighs, “I don’t mind.”

And before Bucky could explain that it has been a long time for him, she was collecting his cum off her skin with her fingers and slipping them into her mouth, maintaining eye contact with the man and almost giving his old heart an attack.

Bucky stared with parted lips, cock already hardening again, as she shut her eyes and moaned over the taste of him.

She had managed to eat every bit of cum that had gotten on her face and neck before Bucky unfroze and lost it.

He grabbed his shirt and hastily wiped her chest clean of his cum before eagerly carrying her to his bed.

He thought her surprised giggle as she called him a “caveman” had to be the sweetest sound he had ever heard until he pushed his cock in her and her wail of his name echoed throughout the quiet bedroom.

Bucky was hooked on the sight of her, the taste of her, the smell of her, and the feel of her.

Her walls were hugging his cock so tight that he thought he wouldn’t be able to get the rest of it inside. Her hands were scratching at his back as she tried to adjust to his size with a silent scream on her face.

“Relax,” Bucky had told her softly.

It was a simple word, but it was the most exhilarating thing when she had immediately listened, her pussy muscles relaxing for him at once, thighs spreading wider to accommodate him better.

Bucky was amazed by her ability to listen to instructions; it awakened an unmatched feeling inside of him.

Once he was buried to the hilt inside of her, Bucky wanted to see what else he could make her do; how much she might obey, so he stayed still.

“I’m ready, you can move.” She had nodded to him, thinking he was waiting on her.

But that wasn’t why Bucky wasn’t moving. He knew she was ready, her juices were ruining his sheets for heaven’s sake.

“I mean, if you ask nicely enough…”

He was just giving it a try, and if she didn’t go along with it he would still give her what she wanted—

“Please,” she begged, eyes pleading as she wiggled her hips, “please fuck me, Bucky.”

Fuck.

Bucky couldn’t think much after that, his body moving of its own volition as he pulled out and slammed back inside her pussy.

It was one thrust. One single thrust had her arching her back and shouting out his name.

He completely broke down, fucking her with abandon, just wanting to hear more of her; feel deeper inside of her.

The bedpost slammed against the wall repeatedly as she screamed with every hit of Bucky’s cock to her g-spot.

The way she was scratching his back, whining, wailing and writhing under him as he pounded her into his bed should’ve and could’ve been enough for Bucky, but he couldn’t help but want more.

“Open your eyes,” he gave her another command, knowing it might be hard for her to manage that one with how deep he was giving it to her.

But her eyes were instantly on him, fighting to stay open as his fat cock filled her up again and again.

“Keep looking at me,” Bucky had told her, his right hand coming up to wrap around her neck.

He was slow and gentle, just waiting for her to stop him or refuse what he was doing.

But she had managed to surprise him again because instead, her hand had come up to his, fully wrapping his palm around her throat before showing Bucky the right amount of pressure to apply.

Fuck, she had to be an angel sent specifically to him from heaven. It seemed like whatever god was up there had finally had mercy on him.

She wasn’t only okay with Bucky’s hand being on her neck, she was showing him how to choke her as his cock fucked her raw within an inch of her life too.

Bucky felt his thrusts stutter as he almost came at the sight of her: mouth open with nothing but his name coming out of it, throat held in his palm and eyes battling to stay open as they rolled back in her head, her pussy chocking his cock.

And when he thought she couldn’t get anymore perfect, she started screaming out a request, “can I please cum? Please, Bucky!”

She was asking his permission to let herself feel the pleasure he was so willingly giving her.

Bucky felt high as he groaned, “cum”, and watched her hand hastily come down to rub her clit once, twice before she fell apart around his cock.

Her thighs involuntarily clasped around Bucky as they shook with the rest of her body, her orgasm hitting her like a thousand trains, making her back bow.

Bucky’s hand tightened around her throat the slightest bit as he felt her pussy shutter around his cock and felt himself get closer to his own release, thrusts becoming erratic.

“Please cum inside me, Bucky. Fill me up with your cum, need it,” she pled and the man could only take so much.

Bucky came and he came hard, proving the cum he had painted her body with earlier to be just a sample of what his cock really had to offer.

When they could both breathe normally again, she found herself in his arms, pitching him an idea, too satisfied and full of cum to stop herself and rethink.

And to her happiness, Bucky actually agreed.

~

When they first started that type of deal, she said she didn’t want a relationship.

Bucky respected that and he was okay with it because although he liked her very much, he knew he wasn’t the relationship type himself. He didn’t believe himself fit for romantic relationships. He thought he was too messed up for such stuff.

And she was just like him.

She didn’t know how to be loved; didn’t know how to receive love. She didn’t think she deserved it. She didn’t think she was worth it. Never thought of herself as beautiful enough or attractive enough or lovable enough.

So the dynamic they came up with was their best option.

They were going to be friends with benefits. Except, the benefits were much more extreme than the usual, vanilla sex that would come to mind. So friends with benefits with a fun twist.

After being manipulated for so long, Bucky wanted nothing but to be in charge of his life, body and mind; to be in a position of power where he had the upper hand.

She, on the other hand, needed her freewill to be taken away from her. Being as responsible as she was in her everyday life, she would get too exhausted; drained. She wanted decisions to be made for her as she only obeyed and conformed. She wanted to be used until her head held no thoughts of her deadlines or tasks.

She wanted choking and spanking and bondage. She wanted domination.

Bucky needed to feel in control, and she needed to give up control.

Take mine, she said, take my control away and make it yours.

It was a perfect match. They had clearly communicated their boundaries, wants and needs. They had established their roles, likes and dislikes. And they had agreed on a few simple rules:

It was strictly sex; only sex.

No kissing on the lips no matter what.

No cuddling afterwards even if aftercare took place.

No strings attached.

The safe word meant they stopped; no questions asked.

Bucky wasn’t exactly on board with number 2 because he knew what her lips felt like on his and he wanted more of that. But she said it would only complicate things; that it might get feelings involved and they couldn’t have that.

So he agreed. He really just wanted her to be as comfortable as possible.

And they had almost done it all in 6 months. She had let Bucky tie her down, spank her, choke her, use toys on her, edge her, overstimulate her, fuck her in every position known to humans and on every service that could take their weight and Bucky’s pace.

But deep down, Bucky knew that she still needed more even if she had claimed otherwise.

He knew that she was frequently going on dates in between their sessions, desperately searching for the one that would manage to sweep her off her feet and magically change the way she looked at herself with his unconditional love.

So when she sat with him that one day and told him she wanted to stop what they were doing because she wanted to commit to her new boyfriend, Bucky wasn’t surprised. He was heartbroken, but not surprised.

And so he let her go.

He didn’t want to. He never wanted to. But Bucky knew that he couldn’t give her what she wanted, and so he was going to let her have it with someone else. He needed her like the air he breathed, but he couldn’t bring himself to stand in her way.

Bucky was addicted to her, yes, but he wasn’t going to be selfish and get in the way of her possible happiness with that new boyfriend whoever he was. He just hoped that that new man deserved her.

~

The real surprise came when Bucky opened his door one day and she was standing there looking like an abandoned puppy three months after their last meeting.

Three months without her that have been torture. Three months during which Bucky couldn’t bear the mere idea of bringing another woman to his bed. Three months of replaying their intense scenes in his head with his hand down his pants.

Oh how he missed seeing her choke on his cock. He missed her begging for him to touch her, to relieve her heavy shoulders of everything they had to carry. He missed seeing her come for him so hard that tears would start rolling down her face.

But now she was here, and she didn’t look okay. And it made Bucky realize that he has mostly missed her being her.

“I need you, Buck,” she whispered and he instantly opened the door wider for her.

Bucky let her inside and she climbed on his lap the second he sat down. He held her in his arms on his couch for as long as she needed, internally aching to know what had gotten her looking so dejected.

He knew it had to do with the new man in her life and he could only calm himself down by imagining his fist slamming against the faceless man’s nose.

“What did he do?” Bucky finally broke the silence, making her pull her face from his neck and look at him.

God, she looked so hurt, so broken.

He wished he could fix it, but how could he when he himself needed fixing?

“If I ask you for a favor, would you do it for me?” Her faint voice asked instead, pulling away from their hug.

“You know I will,” Bucky replied without reluctance.

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

He would do anything for her. He would kill again for her, burn down whole cities and cross oceans on his bare feet for her if she asked him to.

She got up from Bucky’s lap, getting down on her knees before the couch just like the first night he had brought her home, “I want you to punish me, Bucky.”

“What?”

Where did that come from? She wanted to start a session? Now? In that state?

“I want you to spank me. Punish me.” She repeated calmly.

“Doll, you didn’t do anything wrong,” Bucky tried to remind her, wanting her to know that whatever that man did to ruin his relationship with her wasn’t her fault.

And he wasn’t seriously about to give her a spanking when she looked like that, so small and worn out and wounded.

“Please, Bucky.”

Damn, she begged so sweetly. But he just couldn’t.

Bucky never thought he would say no to a scene with her, especially a passionate one, but he couldn’t hurt her even more than she looked to be hurting.

That was not what they did this for.

“Doll, get up. Sit down and talk to me,” Bucky said softly, trying to lift her up by the shoulders.

“Buck, you said you’d do it.” A sad frown settled upon her delicate face with a look that Bucky knew well.

She was getting more heartbroken at his rejection. She really did want this. She needed it and she could only come to Bucky for it. How could he keep turning her down?

“Okay, doll. How many?” Bucky asked despite himself, rubbing his palms together.

“Not with your hands,” she said with a smile, getting up and walking inside the bedroom to his closet.

Bucky carded a hand through his long hair as he waited for her to come back with whatever item she was choosing, knowing this was going to be the hardest time he has ever had to cause her pain, even if it was pain she wanted and asked for.

“With this.” She left the belt she brought on Bucky’s lap as she got back to her place by his feet.

“Doll, this is the thickest belt I own,” Bucky told her, wanting to intimidate her into changing her mind.

He needed her to change her mind. He couldn’t hit her with that thing. Not today. Probably not ever.

“I know.” She nodded with the same sure smile.

“Doll, why?” Bucky touched her cheek tenderly, desperate to understand.

If she would just talk to him, he would do his best to fix it. He probably couldn’t, but he was ready to try.

“Please, Bucky. For me, I need this.” She, again, avoided answering his questions.

“This is gonna hurt, doll,” Bucky warned, examining the belt in his lap.

Damn, it was heavy.

“I know. That’s the point.” She nodded in acceptance, “I need it to hurt.”

“Doll.”

“C’mon, Buck, we’ve done this before. You’ve had me dangling from your ceiling for god’s sake!”

He remembered that day. It was a week after she had gotten promoted and everything was becoming too much for her.

She had Bucky suspend her upside down from his ceiling as he spanked her rear raw before getting her down and fucking her into oblivion until all she could worry about was if she would be able to take another orgasm.

She looked even sadder today, and she was asking for far less.

Maybe he could give her what she wanted.

“How many?” Bucky asked again with a clenched jaw, seeing that there was no way he was going to change her mind.

“As many as it takes for me to cry,” she replied and her answer sent a pang into Bucky’s chest.

So that was it. She needed to cry and she couldn’t. She just needed to cry; to give release to her pent-up tears.

Bucky knew that crying was something that she struggled with. He knew that one of the things she loved about what they did was the fact that she could cry during it all; during a spanking, an edging or even an intense orgasm.

But couldn’t it be done any other way this time? Maybe he could make her watch a sad movie or something?

“Doll, if it’s about you crying—”

“Bucky, please,” she stopped him, shaking her head with determination, “please give me this. I need it.”

If she could, she would have cried to get him to say yes faster.

Bucky sighed, glancing at her one final time before asking, “do you remember your safe word?”

“Red.” She smiled gratefully, adrenaline already pumping through her blood in anticipation.

Bucky slipped the hairband on his wrist down to his fingers, pulling his hair in a low bun before taking his shirt off, leaving himself in his white tank top.

Keeping his eyes on hers, he ordered: “strip and get on the bed, puppy. You know your position.”

“Thank you, Bucky.” She jumped up, placing a kiss on his cheek.

“What was that?” Bucky’s tone was deeper and his eyes darker.

It has started.

“Thank you, sir,” she quickly corrected herself.

“Go.”

One nod of his head and she was running to the bedroom to do as she was told.

As she took her clothes off, folding them piece by piece and leaving them on the chair in the corner of Bucky’s bedroom, he was outside readying himself for what he was about to do to her.

Bucky had pledged months ago that he would give her anything she needed or wanted during their sessions.

Leaving her fulfilled made him feel fulfilled and the first time he had his bare cock in her, Bucky knew he was wrapped around her littlest finger. It seemed like he was the one in control of those meet ups but control was actually always in her hands.

Now, if what she needed was a spanking to make her cry, Bucky knew how to give it to her, but he didn’t want to. He knew this belt was going to hurt a lot and he wished she would’ve chosen something less bad.

But a deal was a deal and he couldn’t back out now that he knew she was waiting naked on his bed.

She heard Bucky’s heavy steps coming closer and tried to regulate her breathing, reminding herself that she wanted this, that she begged for this, that she deserved this.

She trusted Bucky with her life, not just her body. She knew he was going to stop the minute she said her safe word and that made her a little calmer.

“You ready, puppy?” Bucky asked, gliding the tip of the belt across her bare ass from one cheek to the other.

She shivered, fixing her gaze on Bucky’s bedpost as she whispered, “yes, sir.”

And just like that came the first spank.

But it didn’t hurt, not like she had expected, not at all.

Bucky was going easy on her; too easy.

She didn’t like it.

“Harder, please,” she begged, lowering her head and sticking her ass out.

“Doll—”

“Bucky, please, you promised,” she pled, her voice thick with frustration at her inability to get what she needed from the one person who could give it to her.

Another spank came, a little stronger than the first, but still not enough.

“Did your arm get rusty in those three months?” She threw angrily, raising her eyes to glare at Bucky, “hit me like a man!”

Bucky knew she was just trying to rile him up, make him angry enough so that he would actually hurt her and even though he didn’t want to, he decided he would finally give her what she came for.

“Fine,” Bucky growled, pushing her face into his pillows by the hair and she immediately gave him a full view of her lower half, ass in the air and thighs spread.

He wasn’t going to be able to look at her face as he hurt her this time.

Bucky took a deep breath before finally giving her a real whip and she gasped at the force of it, “is that what you wanted, puppy?”

“Getting close,” she moaned, her words muffled into the pillows as she wiggled her ass for him.

Another similar spank hit her and then another and another until suddenly her body was getting hotter and her butt sorer.

She needed more. Just a little more to break the dam and get suffocating thoughts and burning tears out.

“More, please, sir,” she begged, voice so desperate that it had Bucky swallowing.

He gave an experimental whip on her thighs and she let out a startled scream.

“What’s your color?” Bucky asked at once, hesitant that he might have actually hurt her.

“Green.” Came her reply as she looked up to Bucky, “green, sir, please.”

She was begging for more of this.

Bucky recomposed himself and spanked her thighs with the belt again and she wailed out a “yes, thank you, sir!”, urging him on.

For the first time ever, however, Bucky was not enjoying this. He was not enjoying causing her pain and he was not enjoying knowing that he was supposed to make her cry by the end of it all.

His whips got faster and harder as his thoughts ran wild with worry, just wanting to get this over with as her moans and cries egged him on.

“Color?”

“Green!” She would answer every time he checked in with her.

Pictures of her boyfriend in bed with another woman flashed throw her mind and she stuck her ass out more, hiding her ashamed face in Bucky’s pillows. He let her touch him the way only she was supposed to touch him. He made her shout out in pleasure the way she never did with him. He made her scream his name; the name that was supposed to only roll off her tongue during intimate times.

Her mind kept replaying it all, making her squirm and stick her butt out further. She wanted it all to stop.

She needed this. She deserved this. She was stupid.

“Thank you, sir,” she muttered, a lump finally forming in her throat.

It seemed like whatever had happened this time, had been so bad that the normal amount of whips weren’t enough to get her mind off of it. She was still her, well out of sub space and still very much aware of the ache in her heart.

She needed that ache to move somewhere else, preferably to her ass.

“More, sir, please.”

Bucky’s shoulder started to slightly ache as he kept whipping her, again and again, just wanting it to be over so he could comfort her after as he heard her sniffles, and finally, with a particularly harsh spank on her lower thighs she screamed out, “red!”.

Bucky’s arm stopped immediately, dropping the belt on the floor as he listened as her soft cries get louder.

She burrowed her face in his pillow and let it all out, sobs wracking her entire body as she cried her bleeding heart out.

“Doll,” he whispered, regret filling him at the sight of her body trembling with each wail she let out of her chest.

He looked at her lower body and her ass and thighs were a crime scene, her skin painted in angry red welts all over.

“Please, leave me alone, Buck,” she wept, her face still hidden in his pillow.

“Let me take care of you, doll—”

“No, no. Just leave me,” she pleaded without turning to him.

“At least let me put something on your skin—”

“Please just leave me alone. Please, Bucky,” she sobbed harder, her fingers clutching the side of the pillow as she let her tears flow.

Bucky reluctantly left the room, giving her the space she asked for as guilt ate away at his heart.

He shouldn’t have listened to her. He shouldn’t have done that to her.

It was only when he sat down on the couch outside that he had realized how hard he had actually whipped her. His right shoulder ached, a few strands of his hair were out of place and sweat had forced by his hairline. All the realization did was make him feel more terrible about himself.

He knew he has done it before so many times, but this time was different.

She came to him hurt emotionally and instead of helping her feel better, he ended up hurting her physically too.

She did ask for it, but he could have said no. He could’ve insisted on not doing it.

The sound of her cries seemed never-ending and was absolutely heart-wrenching to listen to. Bucky could all but cover his ears to prevent it from reaching him as he beat himself up for causing it all again and again.

She winced as she sat up on the messy bed, hand on her naked chest as she tried to calm herself down, still hiccupping while her cries slowed down.

God, she had needed this so bad. She had needed it for days and she was so grateful for Bucky for giving it to her.

Being able to cry and let everything out was a blessing that people didn’t appreciate enough; one she was kind of deprived of and had to do a lot to get to enjoy.

When her heartbeat was somewhat slower and her tears have ceased, she slowly pulled herself down the bed and on her wobbly feet.

She looked out to the living room from the bedroom door to see Bucky back on the couch, leaning forward with his head in his hands and she knew he was blaming himself.

So she wiped her tears as much as she could and went back inside. She opened the drawer she knew too well and pulled out the Calendula cream Bucky had bought specifically for her.

She carefully walked to Bucky. She didn’t want him to feel guilty so she made sure not to wince as she took her steps.

She had wanted this. She had asked for it because she had needed it and he only helped her. She wasn’t going to let him berate himself for that.

She left the cream on the coffee table and gently removed Bucky’s hands from his face, guiding him to rest his back on the couch so she could sit herself back across his lap.

Bucky stopped her, standing up to take his pants off so that the material wouldn’t rub against her sensitive skin.

She smiled, her heart lurching at his gentleness and thoughtfulness.

He let her manipulate him into position, closely watching her red-rimmed eyes and swollen nose and lips as she made herself as comfortable as possible on his lap, the new lashes covering her behind out of his sight for now.

Bucky hugged her close, his hands stroking up and down her bare back as she pushed her nose in its place in the crook of his neck, “thank you.” She breathed gratefully.

Bucky only patted her back, pulling her closer in reply. He knew she meant her thanks, but he was still mad at himself for doing it.

She pulled back and let him take her in for a second before leaning in, making Bucky swallow.

“Now fuck me,” she whispered on his lips, grinding down on his covered cock despite the pain it gave her every time she rubbed her inflamed skin on Bucky’s boxers.

“Doll, I think you’ve had enough for today,” Bucky sighed, softly trying to get her off of him.

“Please, just once. I won’t ask for anything else.” She pleaded, her hands clutching the material of Bucky’s tank top, not wanting to leave his lap.

She didn’t want to be away from him. She just got here.

“Doll, give me the cream so I can take care of you,” he demanded, trying to maintain a stern tone so she would listen.

“You can take care of me this way too!” She whined, needy and desperate as she ground herself harder, smiling when she found him hard beneath her.

“I can’t, doll. I can’t. You’re hurt.” Bucky shook his head, gently pushing her to the side and getting up before she could straddle him again.

“Please, Buck,” she croaked out, on the verge of crying again as she grabbed onto his waist, “please don’t walk away.”

“Do you promise not to try anything if I sit back down?” He asked although he knew the answer.

“But I need you!” Anguished tears rolled down her flushed cheeks, “just one orgasm. Please, just one.”

Her constant begging was making Bucky’s cock leak inside his briefs, hard as a rock as he tried his best not to give in.

He had missed her so damn much, but this wasn’t right.

“Doll, come on, quit it. You’re hurt—”

“I haven’t cum in three months.” She cut him off, sniffling as more tears left her eyes, “he— he couldn’t— please.” She begged yet again, her hands cravingly clawing at Bucky’s tank top, wanting him to be close again.

“What?!” Bucky sat back down, wiping her tears away as he took her back into his arms.

She nodded in shame as she cast her eyes down, burrowing her face in his shoulder, “he couldn’t make me cum”.

“Not even with his mouth?”

“Especially not with his mouth,” she muttered, hating the memory of a different man touching her.

“And you didn’t get yourself off?”

She shook her head, still embarrassed as she hid from him.

“Why not?!”

“Couldn’t touch myself without your permission.” She looked up to him, her teary eyes sincere.

Bucky let himself just look at her for a beat longer.

She was with another man that she supposedly wanted to be committed to, but she still followed Bucky’s rules during that relationship.

“I can make you cum, doll,” Bucky said, his gaze darkening, “but I have one condition.”

“Anything,” she whispered, desperate for his touch, his lips, his cock.

She had missed Bucky beyond compare.

“Allow me to break a rule.”

“What—”

“I need to kiss you, baby.”

She smiled, her heart relieved despite its fluttering as she answered by pressing her lips to Bucky’s.

He laid her on her back on his couch, careful not to rub himself against her lower region as he devoured her lips. Bucky sighed on her lips, the first taste always the best.

He hasn’t tasted those lips in nine months, since their very first time together. He remembered them tasting of beer back then, but today it was chocolate lacing her tongue.

It was Bucky’s turn to be desperate as he ate up her whimpers, his tongue dancing with hers as he deepened the kiss. He wanted to gobble her up, get as close to her as possible, taste every inch and swallow every whine.

He realized he couldn’t get as close as he wanted without his boxers scratching the welts on her sore skin.

Bucky pulled away for a second, leaving her to chase his mouth as he chuckled.

She whined, making grabby hands at him.

When he was done taking his boxers off, he got back on top of her, tenderly pushing her legs to her chest to keep them from bumping against the couch before slotting himself between her open legs as his mouth found its way back to hers.

“I can’t believe I let you take this away from me for so long,” he groaned, biting down on her lower lip.

She moaned in reply, pushing her hips up so she could get his cock to stroke against her.

She couldn’t believe she had deprived herself of those kisses either because she knew that she had fallen for the man anyways.

One swipe had Bucky hissing as he felt how wet she was under him. He has needed her for so long, not letting himself find any kind of relief with another woman in her absence.

“Do you want my fingers, doll?”

“No, no, gimme your cock, Bucky, please,” she pleaded, squirming on her back on the couch, pushing her hips up.

“I can’t do that, baby. You know it. It would be too much,” he sighed, his thumb stroking her cheek.

“Bucky, please. I can take it. I’ve taken worse!”

“I can’t. I can’t hurt you anymore, doll.” Bucky admitted, his hand sliding her hair behind her ear.

“Bucky,” she whined and his eyes gave her a firm look, making her shut up at once.

“It’s either my fingers or you get nothing, puppy. What do you want?”

“Your fingers, sir,” she replied obediently, pulling her legs further against her chest to give him all the access he would need.

“That’s a good puppy.” Bucky smiled, thumb circling her swollen clit.

“Please,” she breathed, already throwing her head back at the simple touch.

Bucky chuckled, though he was internally fuming at the fact that she was with a ‘man’ who didn’t make her cum for three whole months, “ready for the first one, puppy?”

“Yes, sir.” She nodded quickly.

Bucky carefully slipped two of his metal fingers inside of her dripping cunt, groaning at the tightness he has missed so much, “I know this hand’s your favorite”.

“I thought you said one!” She moaned in surprise, pushing down on his fingers still.

“I meant first orgasm, puppy,” Bucky laughed, scissoring his fingers inside of her, opening her up exactly like he knew she liked.

And when he curled his fingers just right? She was wailing out the yes’s and thank you’s like it was the last time she would ever get fingered in her life.

“Fuck, baby, squeezing my fingers so hard already,” Bucky groaned, the tips of his vibranium fingers nudging her sweet spot with every indulging thrust, massaging and abusing until he saw her thighs quiver with her first orgasm.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” she squealed as Bucky let her come down from her high, fingers slowing down their movements without leaving her leaking pussy.

“Thank me when we’re done, doll.” He smirked, twisting his fingers inside of her.

Bucky got them out for a second only to slip back three fingers instead of two, feeling her cunt hungrily swallow them as she cried out at the delicious stretch.

He bit his lip, shaking his head as he got to business, “fuck, I’ve missed you so much”.

~

“How we feeling, puppy?” Bucky asked her as he saw her legs tense again.

“So good, so so good, sir. Thank you,” she sobbed in pleasure, feeling her thighs shake for the fifth time that afternoon.

“You’re such a good puppy, cumming so hard for me,” Bucky groaned, feeling the pull of her pussy as he tried to take his fingers out, moving them on her clit instead, “keep cumming baby”.

“I can’t take anymore. Please, I can’t.” She shook her head as she tried to squirm away from Bucky’s skilled fingers.

“Okay, okay,” Bucky chuckled, raising one hand up in surrender as his other went into his mouth.

She was gasping for air as she let her legs go, grimacing when her ass touched the couch. She raised her thighs back up, opening them when Bucky hovered over her body for another kiss.

His cock swiped against her sensitive pussy, making her clench when she felt how hard he was. Bucky was so hard it must be getting painful by now.

“Bucky, I can do one more,” she said against his lips.

“Oh you getting greedy on me, puppy?” Bucky smiled, instantly complying as he brought his hand down between their bodies.

She shivered at the mere tracing of his fingers on her pussy lips, “not with your fingers.”

“Come on now, baby, I thought we’ve already talked about this,” Bucky said, ready to pull away from her body.

“You don’t have to put it inside.” She held onto his waist with all her might, “just rub it on me. I can take that.”

“Baby,” Bucky hesitated, his resolve getting weaker as he imagined the feeling of her silky, drenched pussy under his cock.

“Please, Bucky, just rub it on my pussy. Use me. Make yourself cum.”

“You’re gonna be the death of me,” Bucky whispered, getting hold of his cock.

He swiped the tip between the lips of her cunt, moaning lewdly at the feeling he had missed for months.

She was so wet, so sensitive and so soft.

Bucky was never one to cum fast; not after his very first time with her. But she looked so good under him, already fucked out of her mind. She felt even better and he could only handle so much.

He couldn’t believe she was going to make him cum this quick just by letting him nudge her pussy with the tip of his cock.

“Fuck, baby, this beautiful pussy’s gonna make me bust and I didn’t even get to fuck her!” Bucky groaned, feeling his abs get taut as he tried to hold off his orgasm for as long as physically possible.

He didn’t know where to look; she looked gorgeous everywhere and it was making it harder for him not to cum right then and then.

“I’m cumming,” she gave a shout before shaking underneath him for the sixth time.

“Fuck, yes, cum for me, doll.” Bucky groaned, squeezing at his base to hold his orgasm off.

“Slip the tip inside me, Buck,” she begged, still catching her breath and writhing underneath him needily as if he hadn’t just given her five mind-blowing orgasms on his fingers.

He shook his head, trying to focus on not cumming.

“Please, Bucky, just the tip.”

“Shit, don’t say stuff like that.” Bucky’s head tipped back as he closed his eyes for a second to keep from staring into her imploring ones.

“Please, Bucky. Give me your cum. I missed being filled up of your cum so much.” She begged further, “I’m clean, I promise.”

“I never doubted you, puppy.” Bucky opened his eyes, pressing his lips to hers at once.

“Then give it to me,” she moaned on his lips, holding his face close to hers by the cheek, “give me all of your cum, Bucky. Fill me up until I’m leaking all over myself and your couch.”

“Fuck, doll, I can’t hold back anymore. You wanna be filled up? I’m gonna fill you up,” he growled, popping the fat tip of his cock inside her pussy.

She arched her back for Bucky, desperate to feel more of him, “thank you.”

She missed this cock stretching her to her limits so bad. She missed its girth and its veins and the hot cum it paints her walls with.

Bucky could all but let go at the first clench of her pussy, feeling his cum shoot inside of her until it had filled her up to the brim.

He watched her sigh in satisfaction, a smile spreading on her sweet face as Bucky’s hot load filled up her pulsating cunt.

Bucky reluctantly slipped out of her, watching his cum leak out of her ruined pussy, “oh thank you, doll.”

She couldn’t keep her thighs off the couch anymore, body limp and exhausted. She hissed once again when her raw skin touched the rough couch but didn’t pull her legs back up.

Bucky sighed, kissing her forehead lovingly before going to the bathroom to get a wet cloth to clean her up.

He tried to be gentle as he moved around her skin, wiping away the cum and the sweat. He went to leave the cloth in the bathroom and when he came back, she was tiredly perching herself on his lap.

Bucky smiled, taking the calendula cream from the coffee table to finally rub some against her marked butt and thighs. Aftercare was the most important part and he wasn’t about to forego it.

“How the hell did he fail at making you cum?” Bucky couldn’t help but ask as his palm rubbed circles on her sore skin.

“I guess it was me and my unorgasmable pussy.” She chuckled, making Bucky even madder at the man.

He had caused her to think there was something wrong with her and her body?

“Seems pretty orgasmable to me, doll. He’s the one with a broken penis.” Bucky grunted, focusing on keeping his touch gentle on her skin.

“Could make the other girl cum just fine, so not that broken.” She mumbled into her forearms as she rested her chin on them, wanting nothing more than to disappear.

“What?”

Now Bucky really was angry.

“He cheated on me.”

Her voice was so sad, so shattered.

“Doll,”

Bucky didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know if there was even something to say to make this better.

“Yeah, found them together in his bed and everything. They do try to cover up with the white bed sheet just like the movies.” She chuckled again.

She was making jokes, trying to make light of her pain like she always would, but Bucky wasn’t laughing.

“Doll, I’m so sorry. He’s an asshole.”

“It’s fine, really. Doesn’t come as a surprise to me that I wasn’t enough for him.”

“It isn’t fine and you are enough. You’re everything.”

“Bucky, you don’t have to—”

“Be my girl.”

“What?” Her head whipped back so fast, thinking she must have imagined the words.

“Forget about the rules and the deal and forget about our fears. Be my girl, doll,” Bucky repeated.

“Buck, I—”

“I know I’m messed up beyond repair, but if there’s one thing I can’t mess up, it’s loving you, doll. And if I suck at it, let me die trying my best for you.”

“Why’d you have to go and talk about dying now!” She sat back up, not waiting for her skin to fully absorb the cream as she straddled him again.

Her body was hot all over as she took it his words; words she had imagined him saying while standing alone in the shower so many times before that she’d lost count.

“Be my girl.” Bucky smiled, “let me love you like you deserve, doll.”

“You—”

“Yes. I love you,” Bucky admitted, shrugging, his blunt nails clawing at the small of her back nervously.

“You love me love me?”

“I love you love you.” His palms flattened against the small of her back as he nodded with a bigger smile.

“I love you love you!” She exclaimed angrily, “why didn’t you say anything!” She punched Bucky’s chest.

“Ow!” Bucky laughed, holding her hand midway before she could hit him again, “I didn’t think I deserved you.” He kissed her fist.

The gesture left her quiet as a smile formed on her face despite herself.

She cupped Bucky’s cheek and kissed his lips softly, “you’re an idiot.”

“Still think I don’t deserve you, doll. But I can’t pretend like I’m not madly in love with you anymore.”

He tried to deepen the kiss but she pulled away, shocked.

“Bucky, what are you talking about? If anything, I don’t deserve you!”

“Baby, you deserve the whole world.”

“I don’t want the whole world!” She threw her hands in the air, “just one idiot who would hold me on his lap after a good spanking,” she mumbled shyly, making Bucky laugh.

“This one idiot is all yours if you’d have him, doll.” Bucky’s smile was for once reaching his eyes as he brought her in for another kiss.

“I love you,” she repeated, throwing her body around his, holding him tight, fearing it might be a dream.

“I love you too, baby. I don’t deserve you but fuck I love you so much it keeps me up at night like a teenager,” he confessed in her hair, his big hand pressing her closer to him.

“Stop saying that.” She looked him in the eyes, “you deserve everything good in this whole universe and then some. I just hope I could be enough.”

“Could be enough— doll, you’re enough. You’re just right. The exact amount. You’re it. You’re the best for me and the only one I want.”

She didn’t know what to say to that so she put her lips on Bucky’s again and let the kiss demolish her fears and insecurities.

She was in Bucky’s arms and she was enough. She was safe and loved.

This was Bucky. Bucky, who was never intimidated by her professional success. Bucky, who has met her at her worst. Bucky, who has never done her wrong. Bucky, who has gotten to see the real, raw her and never turned away.

It was in that very moment that she realized that running away from Bucky to find love with other men was the worst crime she had committed against herself because now the mere idea of being out of this man’s arms and heart was too illogical and incredulous to even consider.

“I love you,” Bucky repeated on her lips as they caught their breaths.

And she could see it all in his loving, blue eyes as they adored every inch of her face: she was home and she was never getting lost again.

~

Tag list: @harrysthiccthighss @tinystudentfirepurse @lavendercitizen @tumblin-theworldaway @pretty-pop-princess-hs @lilymurphy03 @idontwannagomrstarkk @glxwingrxse @littlelioncub43 @mathletemadison @canned-rootbear @pandaxnienke @loveisallyouneed1125 @floral-recs @littlemoonkiller @hallecarey1 @vespasianphantom @vicmc624 @winters1917 @ionlyeverwantedtobeyourequal @blkmystery @millercontracting @trappedwriter @am-3-thyst @obsessedwithquinn @sydnielauryn @alittlerayof-pitchblack @olipiaa @peterparkersgirl-blog @buckybarnessweetheart @thealyrs @colorfulbluebirdpainter @stuckysgirl27 @ihavetwoholesforareason @princess-bee0 @pastel-noah168 @steeph-aniie @buckitostan @onthr-dream @sapphirebarnes @123iloveyou456 @ciaqui @lindasweetie @justherefortheficandsmut @xxdiaqiaoxx @morgthemagpie @wintrsoldrluvr @goldylions @serendipitouslife90 @sebastians-love @leelee1234love @tiedyedghoulette @saint-marvel @helenaellie @onceithough @raynelbabe @a-very-fictional-girl @justabeluga @lindababe69

[sanguineterrain]

Hey! Can I request a Clark x reader where they're dating but reader doesn't know Clark is superman. And then superman interacts with them for whatever reason and is flirty bc that's his person!!! But reader is like ☝️ hey buddy back off. I'm HAPPILY taken

this is such a cute request!!!! Argh!!!!

clark kent/superman x gn!reader. fluff, brief danger but r is okay. superman flirting with you but he's dating you? he's just a goober. i lub him <3 PLEASE feel free to imagine maws!clark. I feel like this is very himcore 🥰

****

Being a florist in Metropolis is good work. Lots of people still buy flowers, which is great. Many actually buy bouquets for Superman and leave them on display as support. Poppies, yellow tulips, and cornflowers. They're one of your favorite arrangements.

The downside to being a florist in Metropolis, however, is that on occasion, your flower display ends up the target of a killer robot.

You're not sure why that is. Mostly, you wish people would stop building killer robots.

You've gone outside to see what the commotion is about when you're grabbed by a metal claw. It squeezes hard, almost cutting off your air. You squirm in terror as the robot stomps down Main Street, crushing cars and asphalt in its wake.

"Help!" you scream when you catch your breath, and the robot squeezes you harder.

A dizzying blur of red, yellow, and blue zips past you. You think of your flowers.

The blur cuts through the metal like nothing. The robot begins to collapse, twitching and groaning. Its metal creaks, grip loosening on your body.

You hardly fall before Superman is there, cradling you to his chest.

"I've got you," he says, tucking you close.

You look up at him, and he beams at you, like saving you from a killer robot has been the best part of his day.

Come to think of it, Superman came to your aid surprisingly fast, even for him.

And he holds you... intimately. Like you've known him for years. Your heart picks up.

"Uh," he says, cheeks flushed. "Are–are you okay?"

You smile politely, arms around his neck. "Yes, I'm fine. Thank you, Superman."

He nods, flying down the street. "Good. I'll get you back to your shop and clean up the flowers."

You tilt your head. "How do you know I'm a florist?"

Superman looks at you, blue eyes wide.

"Oh! I... uh, I've seen your arrangements all over the city. They're beautiful. I'd never forget that they belong to an equally beautiful face."

Goodness. If Superman is this forward with everyone he rescues, it's no wonder your flower arrangements are in high demand.

"I'm flattered," you begin, and Superman once again aims that grin with the power of a thousand suns at you. "But, respectfully, I'm very happily taken, so I would appreciate it if you'd keep this rescue professional."

Superman raises an eyebrow. To your surprise, he smiles wider.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he says. "I didn't realize you were taken. My sincerest apologies. I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable."

"No, it's alright. I'm honored, but you couldn't pull me away from my boyfriend even with your super strength."

Superman's cheeks turn pinker. He sets you down in front of your store with the utmost care, not letting go until you have your bearings. He takes a step back, rubbing his neck. The gesture makes your brain itch. You don't know why.

"Well, uh, he must've done something right if he's lucky enough to be with you."

"Luck has nothing to do with it," you say fiercely. You don't know why you're so indignant about defending Clark's reputation to Superman. It's not like Clark will ever hear about it.

"No?"

"Not at all. He's an incredible person, kind and smart and loving, and if anyone's lucky, it's me."

Superman makes an aborted gesture to take your hand, then redirects and awkwardly pats your arm instead. You squint at him. He quickly moves away.

"Ah. Sorry. Well, I doubt that. I bet you're equally spectacular."

"Oh. Thank you."

You primly take his hand and give it a good shake. Superman bows his head and laughs.

He takes a step back, eyes bright like you've just made his day.

"Well, I wish you the best with your boyfriend. I'm sorry for being so forward. I've seen your Superman bouquets; your reputation precedes you. I make it a point to know reputed people in Metropolis."

"I can't imagine I'm very high on that list," you say.

"Ah, you'd be surprised. Besides, I never forget a face."

Superman darts behind you and moves at neckbreaking speed to clean up your partially maimed flowers. In three seconds, it's returned to its former glory.

"Well, uh, I'll be seeing you," Superman says, hands clasped behind his back. "I mean, I hope not in a circumstance like this! Th-then again, when else would we see each other? Scratch that, I hope there's no reason for us to cross paths because that would mean you're in danger. Uh, but I don't mean that in a bad way! I just—"

You snort and reach over to take a yellow tulip from your display. You give it to Superman, who takes it like you've just handed him a newborn baby.

"I'm still taken," you say. "But you're very sweet, Superman. Take care, alright?"

"Yeah," he says, tucking the tulip into the strap of his cape. "Yes, you too. Goodbye!"

He soars away, the tulip like a star on his cape.

Superman is handsome and kind, no doubt. But he's certainly no Clark Kent.

[ghostfacd]

KISS AND MAKE UP ; CORIOLANUS SNOW

summary: when coriolanus and you argue over the sudden closeness between him and lucy gray, all hell breaks loose. but he’s reminded that in the end, it’s you who he chooses, and it’s you that will stay.

warnings: reader and coryo have a toxic relationship (are we surprised?), mentions of cheating (no actual cheating involved), fighting and yelling, some ooc!coryo, descriptions may be inaccurate ‘cause i read the book like 2 years ago 😭

“I hate you!” You scream, thrashing in Coriolanus’s threshold. “Let go! Let go!”

“Oh stop making a scene, will you?” He growls out, not appreciating your lack of awareness of the eyes that were currently watching. “She’s fine, she’s fine.” He reassures the staring orbs of eyes, “stop it now, Y/N.”

His tone makes you shiver, and you stop trying to kick yourself out of his grip. He smiles contently at this, finally letting you go, but not before shoving his hands into yours. “See, wasn’t that easy?”

“Oh fuck you.” You say, but both you and Coriolanus know that you’ll be back at square one by tonight, kissing and telling him that you love him.

“Thought I'd have to drag you away and shut you up." He mutters, clearly unimpressed with the way you acted earlier. “Maybe get your shit together, L/N.”

“I would if you’d just act like a decent boyfriend for once!” You say, throwing your arms out in the air. “You know what? I don’t care; I don’t care what you do—go get close to your tribute! Go fuck up our relationship for all I care!”

You yank your arm away from his, stomping inside of the Academy with a scowl plastered on your face. Sejanus is only a few steps behind the two of you, and was going to open his mouth to say something when Coriolanus places his index finger in front of him.

“Don’t.” The boy says. “She’s just being dramatic.” He fixes his uniform, a lavish shade of red, as it was crinkled from the way you had tried to escape his hold earlier.

The next time he sees Lucy Gray, he thinks of your little upset pout and face, your yelling ringing in his ear.

Go fuck up our relationship for all I care!

“Are you alright?” Lucy Gray was cautious around Coriolanus, he was unpredictable, and scarily cunning. She had no idea what was even one of the million thoughts that ran through his mind

“I’m.. fine.” Coriolanus says, giving her a meek smile that almost makes her feel sick. Although she had to admit he was fairly handsome and she had somewhat fell for his charm and face, he still scared her regardless.

“Coryo.” Your voice makes Lucy Gray and Coriolanus both look up. You look like a looming dark figure compared to her, towering over. “We should talk later.”

And Lucy Gray watches as Coriolanus’s once emotionless face turns into a sly grin. He nods, not saying much, which was something Lucy Gray had came to learned these past few days after he had first met and given her a rose.

“Snow always falls on top.” Coriolanus whispers underneath his breath, and Lucy Gray doesn’t question it, only continuing what they had been doing earlier.

When the two of you were walking out of the Academy, you placed your hand in Coriolanus’s. It had gotten colder than it had in the morning, and you were freezing under your uniform.

He carefully caresses your hand, looking up to watch as snow slowly fell from the sky.

“So, you’re gonna tell me what you wanted to earlier?” He asks, still looking at the sky.

“I’m sorry Coryo,” you reply meekly, feeling small under his frame. “For causing a scene earlier. I was upset.”

“Upset at me getting close to Lucy Gray?” He questions, now finally glancing down at you.

“Yes! But you can’t blame me Coryo, you don’t see me getting close with my tribute.”

Coriolanus rolls his eyes, the blue orbs bore into yours. “What did I tell you? I would never cheat on you, silly girl. I’m not a monster.”

If only he knew.

You look down, embarrassed that you two were even having this conversation in the first place.

“I know you wouldn’t, which is why I’m apologizing in the first place.”

The two of you stop abruptly, your eyes reaching his despite the obvious height difference.

“I love you, okay?” Coriolanus breathes out, you can even see his breath, the temperature dropping even lower than it was before.

And although you don’t know the extent to which exactly the words coming out of his mouth are even true, you still go on your tippy toes, shivering as you give your boyfriend a kiss on the lips.

“There’s my smiling girl,” he says as he watches your eyes twinkle. “Now let’s go, I have some ideas of ways to warm you up.”

That night, snow truly, did fall on top.

[yanderefarm]

yandere crime lord x sadistic male reader

cw;; torture, burn wounds, blood, gore, stockholm syndrome, yandere, drugs, kidnapping, murder, smoking, cruel reader

here he is.... my most fucked up bby girl. i wrote this a little differently than the others... i had a different vibe in mind.

achilles is the eldest son of a notorious mob family, the second most powerful in charge right under his father. he makes lots of big decisions, like his recent attempts to take over a smaller gang with cruelty and force. unfortunately being a sexy big shot comes with its own little vices, achilles likes smoking for instance. nasty habit especially for someone in his position, doesn't he realize how vulnerable he is when he's taking a smoke break? so easy for you to drug.

you flick some of the cigarette ash towards the man in question. he's on his knees arms tied behind his back and duct tape over his mouth. he keeps shooting you dirty looks. it's funny.

"such a waste..."

you run a red room service on the dark web. essentially, anyone with enough money can hire you to kidnap and torture whoever they want. some people hire you to make elaborate snuff videos with their desires all written out for you, other people let you and your audience decide what kind of torture would take place over your live streams. that's where the handsome man in front of you came from, the gang he'd been destroying had bought your services.

you had already explained that to him, as well as mocked him for his cigarette habit. now you were letting one of the cigarettes burn before your stream actually started, you didn't actually smoke it choosing instead to let him watch you waste it. his scowl was hot.

his screams were hotter. the first hour in, you had him covered in cigarette burns and his stomach flinching away from your touch. the second hour in, he had multiple gashes all over his trembling body. the third hour in, he had finally started to sob and his body was covered in lovely bruises.

"sorry guys, we can't kill him yet. but that means we get a toy for a little while!" you gripped his hair and brought his tear stained face up to the camera. "say goodbye to our friend!"

and that ended your first stream with your new toy. you cleaned him up and brought him to his new room.

"you'll probably be the show tomorrow unless I get another job. eat up." you gave him a nice dinner and pulled the duct tape off his mouth.

"... when will I die?"

"dunno. good work chilles, sleep well. I'll most likely kill you in the morning."

that's how it began. the guy ended up being your show about half the week for the next two months. never enough to kill him and every day you cleaned up his wounds and took good care of him. he never cursed you or complained about his place he would ask you questions and thank you for the food. it was pleasant conversation, he was a nice companion in your otherwise drab life.

it was halfway into the third month when you got news that those gang members who hired you were dead. you'd been waiting the whole time for them to pay for you to kill achilles and now it was never coming. at least you made good money from your streams in the meantime.

"you're free to go." you stood in the doorway of achilles's room.

his eyes looked at you, slowly widening as he realized what you said. "wh.. why?"

"m gonna drug you up and drop you in front of your house. you won't know where you were but I'd really appreciate if you didn't try to come after me at all. "

"why are you letting me go? did something happen?"

"you should quit smoking by the way. maybe i won't be able to get you-"

you saw something in his eyes snap. those eyes that had been practically blank the whole time even when the torture made him lose his voice from screaming. now they were dark and hazy, significantly more threatening than he'd been before. he crawled on his hands and knees to your leg and looked up at you with tears in his eyes.

"why....? am i not.. did i do it wrong? i can be a good toy."

you were caught off guard by his reaction. "uh... well uh the guys who hired me like... they died without paying me to kill you. so like... i don't have a reason to keep you?"

"how much?"

"huh??"

"how much do you need to keep me?"

you reached down and gently carded your hand through his hair. "you don't want to stay here, dumbass."

"yes I do." he nuzzled his head into your hand.

"you really want to stay here and get tortured until you die? use your brain."

his darkened eyes looked up at you with the most pathetic look. "i want to stay with you."

"fuck" he's cute? he's cute. "ok...jesus, lets do this. you go home, get reunited with your family, try to get back to normal life. and I'll contact you so if you still want to be LITERALLY tortured over living your normal life I'll bring you back. ok?"

"you'll actually come get me, right?"

"yeah. I'll get you and I won't even make you pay."

"I'll be back soon." he rubbed his head against your leg. "please get your favorite tools ready."

[dollfacefantasy]

LAST MINUTE ♡

pairing: frank castle x fem!reader

summary: when frank won't give you attention, you have to convince him not to leave somehow...

cw: nsfw (18+), smut, boot humping, praise/degradation

wc: 3.3k

a/n: i love him i love him i love him sooooo badddddd. if you send me asks about this man i'll make out with you sloppy. anyways, comments and reblogs appreciated too <3

kinktober slot: day 25 - boot humping

Frank's eyes cast over to the corner of the room where you're sitting in front of the mirror. He can hear you humming to yourself, your voice rising and falling to the soft tune of a song you'd been obsessed with for the last few weeks. Your fingers smear some lotion across your cheeks. The pads of them massage the cream into your malleable flesh.

Your gaze catches his watching you through the reflective pane. He sees a smile spread across your lips before you turn around and spring to your feet. Your body is only covered by a t-shirt of his along with the pair of panties lying beneath. You prance across the bedroom and glide around to hover behind him.

The scent of your lotion and shampoo from the shower you'd just taken cloud the air surrounding him. It's light and airy, like the vision of you that floats through his head nowadays. He wasn't sure when you'd taken up permanent residence there, though he couldn't really complain. Thoughts of you are better than echoing gunshots or screams.

He hums in acknowledgement of your proximity, giving your forearm a pat with his rough hand. It's smooth beneath his fingertips. So untouched it feels wrong to drag his calloused skin across it.

You don't seem to mind though. Not with the way you duck your head and kiss his cheek.

"It seems like something's bothering you," you murmur, the wisps of your breath brushing over his face.

His attention returns to the weapons in front of him. He focuses on cleaning the parts and putting them back together. Your words were kind of stupid. There's always something bothering Frank. Moments where he has a clear head are few and far in between; reserved for when he's asleep in your arms or balls deep in your cunt.

He doesn't say anything rude though. He knows you're trying to be sweet. The statement is your subtle attempt at offering up your ear. You always told him he could vent. He could cry over the past or seethe about his plans for the night, either way you'd be right there. But that would only be if he ever actually took you up on that offer.

Instead, all you get in response is a grunt before a muttered "'m fine, baby."

You frown. He can see it out of the corner of his eye. Your lips turn into that pitiful little pout that drives him up the wall. Good thing his eyes are locked on a different target right now.

"Are you sure? Feel like you got something on your mind," you try again. Your hands slide up to his shoulders, fingers beginning to tenderly massage his tense deltoids.

"Told you I'm fine," he says again. The words are firm and closed off, but they don't strike you as unkind.

"Wellll… if there was anything wrong, would there be anything I could do to make it better?" you whisper.

Your lips press against his cheek bone again before migrating downward. Your soft, plump lips coasts over his jawline and onto his throat. You feel his smile make a brief appearance on his face, but his hands don't stop rotating the cleaning rag over the grip of his gun. He hasn't abandoned his task for you. Yet.

"There's nothing wrong. Don't start makin' a fuss over it," he grumbles.

"C'monnn, Frankie," you say softly, "Just tell me one thing. Even if you feel fine, just tell me one thing that you'd like."

A few more gentle pecks land on his neck. Your fingers continue to swirl and massage into the tender muscles in his shoulders.

"I'd like it if you got some rest tonight and didn't stay up worrying about me or watching the news," he responds.

You roll your eyes. Of course, you were gonna do that regardless. You always worried about him when he was 'working.' He'd spend the hours out taking care of what - or who - ever, and you'd occupy that time in your apartment doing just as he said, pouring over news reports and bouncing your leg until you were so tired your eyes couldn't stay open if they wanted to.

"Be seriousss," you whine, growing more petulant with him.

He glances over at you upon hearing that tone. That rise in pitch never did you any favors with Frank. He didn't fall for the puppy eyes or quivering lip.

"I am serious. I don't want you worrying or stressing. I'll be back tonight, and I want to come back to you sleeping in bed. Not watching for me at the fire escape," he says.

"Ok well pick something I can actually give you now," you concede.

Space. That's what he wants to tell you. Not in an annoyed way. He loves your touch, adores feeling your body heat oozing off of you. But it's hard to get in the mind frame of a killer when your breasts are pushing against his back and your nose is gliding over his throat.

He doesn't say that though because he knows no matter what tone of voice he says it in, you'll only take it in the 'I'm sick of you' way.

"What makes you think I need anything?" he asks. He puts the handgun he'd been working on down on the table and picks up a larger assault weapon instead.

"Oh my god, you're so difficult," you huff, "I'm just trying to be nice to you. I don't like seeing you all grumpy and stressed."

You may not have liked it, but grumpy and stressed was the version of Frank you saw the most. It was the one you fell in love with. The one that spends the night here in your apartment most days of the week. The one who's hoodies you wear. The one who holds you while you sleep and grunts against your skin when he has a bad dream.

"I'm not. I'm just thinking. You're making something out of nothing, sweetheart," he chides.

"You know… I think you just don't want to admit that you need a night off," you say, nodding in agreement with yourself.

"No."

"Just wait. Don't shoot it down before I explain," you try to reason.

"No," he says again.

"Yes! You'd feel so much better if you had one single night to relax," you argue.

He looks at you with a bit of disbelief. "I can't just call in sick. There is no 'night off,'" he says. His tone is strict, no room for negotiation or bargains, but that doesn't stop you from trying.

"I know, but you don't have to go out. You could text your 'people' and they could do whatever for the night," you say. His people is the term you call whoever he works with. You know there's at least one other guy, he's just never told you any names or details. "Just one night to let me take care of you. It would be good for you. And plus, I miss you," you pout.

He eyes you for a moment, dark pupils scanning over each small curve of your face. The pause gives you hope that he's considering it. That maybe he'll choose to stay with you instead of the shipping yards or rooftops.

"Don't give me that 'I miss you' act. You know I miss you too, but I can't just stay with you and sit on my ass all night cause you think it's the magic cure to me being a hardass," he says.

You narrow your eyes as the look on your face likens more to sulking.

"It's not magic… just if you rest, you'd be less uptight," you say. You loop your arms around his neck again and smoosh your cheek against his, letting the prickly spikes of his stubble scratch you.

With a little sigh, your attention shifts to what he's working on. He's still cleaning the metallic item on the desk in front of him. You watch his hands work, moving in methodical swipes. Efficacy learned from years of experience. Still, it's so boring to you that you can't even come up with a question to feign interest. Not that he'd answer anyways. He didn't like involving you in his other job.

You puff air through your lips to signify your apathy. "Frank…" you whimper, right by his ear, soft and quiet.

Usually, you avoid asking him to stay home. You never complain about the awkward hours or inconsistent time you get with him. You don't accuse him of being uncaring or allege that he's using you. But maybe it's the fact that he so blatantly denied you tonight that has your mind acting up.

"Quit while you're ahead, baby. I don't wanna argue before I leave," he says.

"I'm not trying to argue. Why can't you just consider it?" you ask.

"You know why. Now, enough," he says, bringing the discussion to an end.

Your head slumps over onto his shoulder, your ear flush against the cotton of his shirt. Of course, you know why. You know why this stuff is important to him. And it makes you feel guilty for even suggesting a brief reprieve from it.

Sagging down, you slide around to the front of his chair and drop to your knees at his feet. You rest your head on his thigh, displeasure displayed across your lips.

"You're so mean to me," you mutter.

He glances down at you, smirking a little at your exaggerated defeat. "You think so?" he prompts.

"Mhm," you hum, nuzzling against the denim covering his leg.

You scoot a little closer to his leg, pressing your torso flush against the limb. Closing the distance brings his foot to rest right between your legs. You feel it, but you don't care to notice it yet. Instead your fingers massage his calve absentmindedly.

The bedroom is quiet for a few moments spare the sounds of fabric rustling and both of your soft breaths. He just watches you for a few moments before you feel his hand pet the curve of your head.

"So unfair," he says.

You suppress the smile wanting to show on your features. The look of joy at receiving his attention. His thumb swipes back and forth over your skull. The warm weight of his palm coasting over you does soothe ypu even if you still wanna act coy.

"Yeah, especially cause I just wanna spend time with you," you sigh.

"You'll get to. Tomorrow," he responds. You can hear the clipped amusement in his voice.

Just as quick as it came, his hand leaves your head. It's back to the table. He moves onto a knife now, cleaning some grimy stain that you don't even want to know the origin of.

Shifting your head upward, you rest your chin on his knee and glare at him. "But-"

"I'm not gonna tell you again the answer is no."

The words die in your throat, leveling down to a whine. "See? Mean," you say.

You turn your head back to his side, squishing your cheek against his knee. The hard bone divots the soft flesh of your cheek like a crater on the moon.

You're content to just sit in this position and rest there until he stands up to go. To cling to his leg like the words "please please please" are about to spill from your lips. But in your deflated state, you sink down a bit more. You relax the muscles in your thighs and inadvertently bring the seat of your panties in direct contact with the scuffed top of his boot.

It doesn't shoot bliss through you like a bolt of lightening, but it sparks a fuse in the pit of your belly. The solid curve of it slotted right up against your clothed heat.

As an experimental touch, you grind your hips down. You make sure to be subtle, not wanting him to see what you're doing before you can determine if it's worth the humiliation. The muted sensation of pleasure that fills your belly answers that question quickly though.

Once you get the first taste, you rock your hips back and forth in little bursts. It wouldn't be noticeable to a quick glance, but a more intentional look would catch the way your ass pushes forward and back.

What gets him to notice is the feeling of you gripping his leg tighter. You press the hard front of his shin between your breasts and down your stomach harder. That gets him to look in your direction. When he does, he finds the sight of you getting yourself off with his boot.

"What're you doing?" he asks, giving you the chance to explain first.

"Nothing," you answer almost instantly.

"Doesn't look like nothing. Doesn't feel like nothing," he says as he tilts the point of his shoe upward. The boost grants some more friction to your clit, drawing a sharp whine out of you.

"Might have to get you a collar if you keep acting like a puppy, baby," he teases.

"I'm not," you whimper. You press your face harder against his knee as if it could act as a shield against the embarrassment.

"Really? Whining and humping my leg like you're in heat doesn't count?" he mocks.

"Shut up," you choke out.

"Attitude," he tuts. He shakes his head before his eyes flit back to the weapon on the table, letting you do your thing.

And you take advantage of that. Your hips move back and forth like a pendulum. You can feel the thin cloth of your underwear getting sticky as arousal leaks from you at the soft stimulation blooming between your legs. Your poor, swollen clit presses on the firm material as you let out a raucous whine. He tsks at you from above.

"It's getting late. You might wanna keep your volume down," he says.

The words come out so dismissive, so passively entertained. As if you're merely background noise. You can't help whining again. Your grip tightens on him, and your hips move in broader circles. If he's just going to let you do this, you're going to take advantage.

More sparks of white hot pleasure fizzle between your thighs. Your cunt ruts over the expanse of Frank's boot in quick strokes. The fabric of your panties only serves to provide some extra friction. Your eyes flutter and your cheek feels numb from the pressure of his kneecap again.

It feels as if you're in your own little world while doing this. Even if you're attached to him, it still seems like you're in a haze of your own at the moment. Just a lusty daze focused on making yourself feel good.

Vaguely, you can hear the clicks of his equipment above. The rustling of pouches and cloths. The clunking of organization. It all means nothing to you. The only thing you're concerned with is how your folds spread across the shape of his shoe.

You mewl softly. A trickle of saliva leaks from your mouth onto the rough fabric of his pants. All your thoughts have melted away. Your limbs stay locked around his leg, ensuring you have secure leverage to rock yourself back and forth.

He still doesn't acknowledge you. His eyes stay on the table. Honestly, you would believe he didn't even know you were there if not for him lowering his foot and then raising it again. The motion gives you a burst of stimulation, an interruption to the rhythm you'd set for yourself.

A desperate whine crackles out of your throat. You spread your thighs further to get down on him and press your aching pussy against him harder.

"Frank…" you whimper before biting your lip for a moment.

This time he doesn't disregard the call for him. He reaches down, sweeping his hand over your head and cupping your jaw. He directs you to look up at him and gets clear view of your empty eyes.

"What is it, baby?" he asks. His thumb brushes back and forth across your lower lip. The simple touch is enough to send you into orbit.

"I…" you try to start. But words are hard to conjure when thoughts have become nothing more than memory. "I love you," you end up choking out.

He chuckles. "Yeah, you do," he agrees.

You whine and lower your head again. Your body doesn't stop swinging your hips. His hand migrates back to the top of your head.

"I love you too, sweetheart," he says. His voice rumbles out low and quiet, so gravelly you can almost feel the vibrations in your bones.

He continues to gaze down at you. His eyes drink in the sight of you getting yourself off on his leg. Your hips constantly drag over the seamless surface of his shoes. Cute little noises pour from your mouth in a never-ending flow. Your eyes scrunch up and your nose crinkles when rushes of euphoria course through you.

"You gonna cum on my boot, doll? Gonna make a mess?" he rasps.

You nod eagerly. "Mhm. Mhm. Mhm," you whimper. In direct contrast to his, your voice floats into the air light and soft.

"Do it. Maybe I'll have you lick it up afterwards. I know you'd do it. Shit, you'd probably fucking like it," he says.

That's all you need to rush the spark on your fuse to the end and send you into an explosion of pleasure. Your back arches and you cling to his leg like it's a lifeline. Your grip gets so tight that had you been more lucid, you probably would have worried about cutting off his circulation.

Your pussy clenches around nothing, your walls fluttering with the urge to feel him spilling inside you in unison. Regardless, you keep rabbiting your hips and working yourself over the peak. Your noises come out more whiny and full of need, aching to hear his grunts in your ear.

As blissed out as you are, your droopy eyes still catch sight of the solid bulge in his pants. You hold out hope that maybe you'll get to have some of what you long for before he goes.

The intensity of your high begins to simmer down to a satisfying warmth as you reach the end. Your hips move slower and slower until they come to a stop. You catch your breath, panting and leaning against his leg totally lax.

He doesn't say anything. He just finishes up what he was doing and lets you come down on your own.

After a few minutes though, he does scoop you up off the ground and into his lap.

"That feel good?" he asks.

Your head bobs up and down.

"Looked like it," he grumbles.

"Not as good as it would've felt with you though," you murmur.

He stares at your content, post-release face. It's not a surprise you want more. Had you not hinted at wanting him to fuck you properly after that, he would have been actually concerned for your well-being.

"Guess you'll have to wait till I get back to find out," he says lowly with a kiss to your temple.

"But Frank…" you say, lazily sliding your hand down. The center of your palm lands on his swelling bulge, giving it enough pressure to drag a hiss from his lips.

He pauses, lets you stroke him a few times. It feels good. He knows he should just push you off. Should send you off to bed now that you're all nice and relaxed. But he can't resist that light caress.

Sighing he lifts you and steps over to the edge of the bed. Dropping you back on the mattress, he starts to remove his belt.

"You got fifteen minutes, ya little brat. After that, I'm still leaving," he tells you before dropping forward and hovering over your body, bringing your lips into a brisk kiss.

[ellecdc]

There are not nearly enough ffs on here where reader sucks Sirius off.

I just know he would sound so GOOOOD!

And he'd look so pretty with his head tilted back hshsbsknshsjsbsjshsbsjshshsjsnen! THIS MAN IS A WORK OF ART!

(If you take requests rn, I'd appreciate it if you solved my problem <3, if not, thanks for listening to me whine.)

mmmmmmmmmmm, I agree

Sirius Black x fem!reader who's very good with her mouth [848 words]

CW: oral (m receiving), nsfw/18+, swearing, no plot...sort of

Sirius only managed to open his eyes and point his face back towards you after you had nearly pierced through the skin of his thighs with your nails.

“Fuck!” He hissed as he raised a shaky hand to push some hair away from your eyes; his face beautifully flushed and chest heaving as he watched you pull off his cock.

“You have to be quiet, Sirius.” You chided gently as you continued stroking him, letting him cool down for a moment as you languidly licked up the underside of his shaft. “You’re going to alert the entire house of what we’re up to here.”

Here being the guest bathroom in James and Lily’s house as you sucked off your slightly tetchy boyfriend. 

Though, you had to admit he seemed far less tetchy now that he was sitting against the edge of the tub with your face hovering around his groin and your hand stroking him slowly. 

“Gotta stop being so bloody good at that then.” He shot back, though his usual haughtiness was significantly dimmed by the fact that his eyes were mostly pupil and he was looking down at you as if you had just completely torn him apart.

How wrong he was though.

“Good at what?” You asked innocently, before taking him back in your mouth and sinking low enough to feel the hairs that trailed down his stomach tickle your nose.

“Ugh, fuck, that! That!” He moaned above you, words melting into a sound bordering a moan and a sob as he placed his hand over yours in apology when you dug your nails back into his thigh at his volume. 

You removed your punishing grip from his thigh and brought your hand to his balls, relishing when they tightened in your grasp and his dick twitched in your mouth. 

“Shit, baby, I-”

You hummed as you carried on in your ministrations, the hand you currently had on his cock speeding up as you removed your mouth and brought it to join that first hand, making sure to give both equal attention before returning to his shaft. 

You watched in wonder as Sirius threw his head back again; his mouth hanging open as puffs of air and the occasional whine escaped his lips, the ones you couldn’t hear punctuated by the bobbing of his throat. 

He was gorgeous, always, but he was so ethereally beautiful like this; unreserved in his pleasure, carefully undone, and completely yours. 

You gave one last tug on his sack before moving both hands to his cock with renewed vigour, both of you ready to finish; you for your now aching jaw and burning knees, and him for having been edged on by you for the past however long you’d been hiding in the loo. 

“Fuck me, baby; holy shit.” He let out breathily, leaning forward and resting his hand on the top of your head. “Jesus Christ, yes.”

His hips started meeting you part way and you let him fuck into your mouth, having to keep yourself from getting too loud at the moans he was eliciting every time his tip hit the back of your throat.

“Fuck, I- I’m gonna-”

So you grabbed both of his wrists and held his hands in their place at the back of your head and relaxed your throat, sinking as far down onto Sirius’ cock as you could and swallowing as he came with a cry.

As quiet a cry as he could muster, at least, which you tried to be thankful for as you finally pulled off of your boyfriend and sat back on your heels, taking a moment to catch your breath. 

“I’m dead, I think I actually died. You killed me, gorgeous, you and that beautiful mouth.” He panted, words teasing but expression screaming torn apart and put back together again. 

Perfect.

“Feeling better?” You asked eventually as you stood - now on shaky legs - and fussed in the mirror, hoping to step out of this bathroom looking as little like your-face-was-just-fucked as possible. 

“I should bloody think so, Christ.” Sirius agreed as he stood - also on shaky legs - and righted the zip and belt on his black washed jeans. 

“Good. Be nice to your brother, then.” You ordered, earning you an indignant groan from Sirius that was all for show as he let his forehead fall against your shoulder.

“But he’s such a tosser.” 

You gave him a warning squeeze of his crotch - still sensitive if his hiss in reaction was anything to go by - and he pretended to relent.

“Fine, fine. I’ll play nice.” He agreed as he smacked a kiss to your cheek.  “Say, you have any siblings you want to squabble with? You know, so I can return the favour?” 

You gave him a sultry look as you helped fix his hair - still pretty well perfect after all that - and stepped back towards the door. “Oh, I have many ways that you can return the favour later, handsome.”

And with a matching smirk, he followed you out of the bathroom to return to the rest of the party.

[seat-safety-switch]

I haven't fucked up this bad since the time I brought a package of Jiffy Pop to the veteran's hospital. Lots of people were screaming at me, both then and now.

For the longest time, my town had a coal mine. Shortly before my birth, they decided to close it. Coal was the fuel of the past, the town fathers said. Well, they didn't count on a TikTok trend (possibly sponsored by the coal industry) telling kids to burn it for clout. Suddenly, there were teenagers trying to break into the disused coal mine for more than just Halloween dares and pseudo-spooky makeout sessions.

Something had to be done about this. A security guard had to be hired. And, in flagrant disregard for free-trade agreements, they hired someone local. Me, specifically. It turns out that I am the only person left in town who is not working two or three jobs, and therefore perfect for the gig of night watchman at the coal mine. It also helped that my release conditions mandated I maintain employment, and my parole officer was starting to get suspicious that the screenshot of Microsoft Excel I taped onto my bedroom window did not actually constitute gainful "remote work." Bigot.

Now, you know me. You've gotten to appreciate, or at least tolerate, my whole "thing." I knew that I could work hard for maybe thirty minutes tops before I would, too, be descending inside that coal mine. Putatively, it would be to search for wayward kids (or the skeletons thereof) but in reality we both know that I'd be looking for an internal combustion engine to monkey with. Not like I didn't warn the town: I told them that they needed to get me a cool kei truck or something to patrol the mine with, but they were just like "bluh bluh it only has one entrance bluh bluh our road budget is already too high" and then they kicked me out of the Mayor's car.

I certainly did not have to look very far for one. The miners left a pretty rickety-looking mine cart right there at the opening. I could fuck with a train to pass the time, I thought. If any kids come, they'll be too scared by all the cursing and tool-dropping to break in here for French kissing. Or even Danish kissing, if they're freaks.

Anyway, it turns out that the mine shaft also had a bunch of tanks of pure acetylene lying around, and the little diesel engine pulling the mine train really liked that. Up until the pistons turned into incandescent bulbs somewhere along the highway into town. I'll tell you this much, though: after plowing right through the side of the high school, none of those overgrown children are going to think it's "cool" to fuck around with stuff in a disused coal mine ever again.

[wileys-russo]

childhood sweethearts (8) II a.russo x reader

series playlist one two three four five six seven

will they? won’t they? the age old question x

childhood sweethearts (8) II a.russo x reader

once again alessia found herself sat alone in the same cafe as last time, profound deja vu setting in. her leg was bouncing anxiously and her eyes flickered to the door every few seconds, nervous you'd not show despite having been the one to extend the invitation to her.

but this time alessia knew she was early, having been far too worried about what you might actually have to say to her that she'd shown up a whole forty minutes before your agreed meet up time.

having sat in her car for the last twenty five she'd ventured inside, waiting until it was five minutes before you'd hopefully show to order your coffees, remembering what you had gotten last time and crossing her fingers it was what you'd want again.

her body relaxed the moment you walked inside, raising her hand as you spotted her, the blonde cursing to herself at the awkward gesture as you sat across from her with a smile, seemingly quite relaxed which alessia didn't know if it was a good thing or a bad.

"is this mine?" you asked gesturing to the iced coffee in front of you as the blonde nodded, rambling out that she hoped it was right and that if it wasn't she could easily get you another. "hey, alessia breathe. this is my regular order, it could be two degrees and i'd still get an iced coffee." you joked.

the two of you made some polite small talk, alessia asking about your week as you enquired about hers. the two of you swapping a few stories and a laugh before you decided to put her out of her misery, easily sensing her obvious nerves for why you'd asked her to meet with you in the first place.

which you could hardly blame her for given how your last conversation had gone, and it had taken you a lot of thinking to actually move past that.

"so i obviously asked you to coffee for a reason." you started, alessia nodding as she finished the last mouthful of her drink, setting the empty glass aside.

"i know that the last time we spoke was a bit...tense?" you smiled awkwardly, as one does when the last time you're present in front of someone you scream at them about your dead dad and then promptly collapse into a disgusting sobbing mess.

"and i appreciate you giving me the space that i asked for." you thanked her softly. "there's obviously a lot of history with us alessia and its not something either of us can or should forget, the good and the bad alike." you continued, the blonde across from you twisting her rings around her fingers, clearly still apprehensive about what you might say but listening intently.

"i won’t lie i was so incredibly angry with you for a really long time. and i was hurt and upset and i didn't understand why you did what you did or why you thought i’d have not supported you from the beginning.” you continued, alessia accepting your words with a nod.

“it took me even longer to actually come to terms with my pain and start to move past the anger because it didn’t do me any good, leaving it and you behind. i remember when you won the euros i was grateful to be living overseas because i don’t know how i’d have coped seeing your face plastered everywhere when i had been trying my best to move on with my life.” you were perhaps a little blunt in your words but the blonde across from you appreciated the honesty.

“i got over the breakup a lot faster than i actually got over losing you. i may have lashed out at you about it but you weren’t wrong, we were a huge part of each others lives for a long time before we dated. and i think i felt like once I moved past losing you as a partner, it hurt more to grieve the actual history and years of friendship and that immense bond we had before which was just suddenly gone.” you admitted quietly, a flash of pain glancing across both yours and alessia’s faces momentarily as the blonde was briefly plagued by the memory of her own feelings toward the loss.

“but look i think there is some merit in saying that people change. and i can see that you're making an effort to try and show me that's not who you are anymore." you noted, pausing for a second to collect your thoughts.

"i still feel that the kiss was a mistake, and that it can't and won't happen again. i’ve moved past those feelings for you and i just can’t risk being hurt like that again.” you remanded softly, alessia's stomach clenching at the memory of your lips on hers but she made sure this was disguised, nodding along. unbeknownst to her all of this was also playing on your mind, but you’d shoved deep down how good it felt to lean into the feeling of her lips on yours in favour of not ever wanting to be so let down again, you had your walls up for a reason and you’d learned to protect yourself as best you could.

"but you were right, we do both live here now and its obvious our mums are clearly back in one anothers lives again so we are going to have to interact regardless. so, i guess what i'm trying to say is that i'm open to trying to be friends again." you revealed, alessia's eyebrows shooting upward unable to disguise the obvious surprise on her face at your words.

"but slowly. i still have a lot of trust issues after everything, and they don't just go away overnight." you warned as alessia nodded furtively, clearly trying to hold back the grin which you could see tugging at the corners of her mouth.

"okay." the blonde breathed out, biting her bottom lip to stifle her smile as you shook your head with a smile of your own. "okay?" you chuckled, sipping on the last of your coffee.

"okay. yeah this is good, this will be good. but slowly! i can do slowly." alessia nodded, more as if to reassure herself than you as you hummed. "and just friends less, that other chapter is closed now and i don't want to open it again." you cautioned gently, aware that obviously all of this would be triggering things for her too, not just within you.

"i understand. like i said, i've missed you. to have you back in any capacity is more than i deserve, thank you." alessia admitted quietly with a shy smile, her heart admittedly pounding. again there was the soft vulnerable shy side of her you’d rarely seen growing up, and it was obvious that in her maturity there’d been some changes to her once almost aggressively over confident demeanour.

but between this opportunity that alessia been presented to have you back in her life coupled with the fact you'd just not called her by her full name without correcting yourself, she was quite the happy mess.

"to friendship." alessia lifted her empty glass with a grin causing you to laugh. "really?" you raised an eyebrow in amusement as alessia nodded and gestured for you to do the same. "it's empty! its bad luck to cheers with an empty glass.” you accused pointing to her finished coffee with a roll of your eyes.

"there's some...watery coffee like liquid left." the striker peered into her glass with a wince, the two of you sharing a look and a wide smile.

"fine, to friendship." you knocked your glass into hers, downing the last mouthful of your coffee as the blonde sipped the few milimetres of melted ice left in her own, grimacing in disgust.

"so, how do we um…do this?"

~

walking into training that afternoon there was seldom a thing someone could have said to wipe the shit eating grin off of alessia's face.

she was always known to be a positive person by nature, never unkind or rude to any of the staff or her team, always yelling out encouragement during drills or games, cracking jokes or messing about with the girls who she was closer to.

however to those same girls it was also not hard to see that today there was very obviously an extra bit of pep in the young lionesses step as she sauntered into the cafeteria for lunch, flashing around a toothy grin.

"you're even more chipper than usual less. have a good morning?" lotte questioned with a surprised smile as alessia sat down with her tray of food, humming in agreement. "would you like to elaborate?" lotte chuckled picking at her chicken as vic sat down followed closely by katie and caitlin.

"russo! you're glowin today. have a cheeky midnight rendezvous did we?" katie teased as alessia's face blushed bright red which vac wasted no time teasing her about, pinching at her cheeks as alessia shoved her off with a playful roll of her eyes.

"no. just caught up with an old friend for coffee." alessia explained with a shrug, shoveling a mouthful of food in as lotte narrowed her eyes slightly. "not..." she trailed off with an insinuating look as alessia avoided her eyes.

"oh less." lotte sighed, shaking her head as she picked at her food. "not the ex missus from the bar?" katie caught on quickly with a shocked look, alessia hissing for her to be quiet and smacking her arm across the table.

"an ex girlfriend? you like girls? why am i the last to know about this?" vic scoffed in offence shoving the blonde beside her. "cause you chose not to come out that night! russo here got beyond blind pissed and called her ex missus who had to come and pick her up, and the poor girl was not happy about it." katie caught the dutch girl up as caitlin shoved her, nodding to alessia with a firm warning look.

"oh was that private information? sorry less." katie winced slightly as vic rounded on alessia with a hundred questions. "okay fine i'll tell you! just shut up for five seconds." alessia huffed at the shorter girls persistence who immediatley went quiet, all four girls now looking to the blonde for an explanation.

so with twenty minutes left before they were expected into the gym, alessia opened up about almost everything between you and her, well as much as she was willing to share with her friends anyway.

"christ russo, you planned on leavin without even tellin her? harsh. i'd have dumped ya too, and kicked your arse!" katie whistled, caitlin stomping on her foot with a firm look at her girlfriends inability to clearly read the vibe of a room.

suddenly the training staff called for everyone to head toward the gym as the girls stood, alessia appreciating the forced cut off of their previous conversation as they all dumped their trays and split up to head off out of the cafeteria.

"i stand by what i said early on, are you sure this is a good idea? that you're able to be just friends with her? that break up had you really not okay for a long time less." lotte questioned softly, eyes shining with care for the younger girl.

"look i can't answer that right now. but i would rather have her in my life as a friend than nothing at all. she’s been my best mate since we were five lotte and we've spent too long apart, i miss her." alessia admitted with a sigh, lotte nodding in understanding, pulling her into a tight side hug before they were split up for drills.

~

"oh look what’s come crawling out of its cave, it lives!" your older brother harry teased as he opened the door and let you in, causing you to shove him with a roll of your eyes. "hello stranger." your older sister lilly called out from the sofa causing you to groan in annoyance.

"sorry i have a life outside of mooching off mums cooking and fully stocked up cupboards." you retorted back, shrugging off your jacket and hanging it up by the door.

"they're not here yet." harry added as you glanced toward the backyard where several people littered about. alessia hadn’t been wrong your mum had organised another get together with the russo’s, however of course being the hostess with the mostess she had also invited several of her other friends and their families along too.

“why are you both hiding out in here then?” you chuckled, wandering into the kitchen and shaking your head at the amount of prepped food, enough to feed twice the amount of people. though it would mean you could likely steal some leftovers for your work lunches this week and that was a promising thought.

“i’m taking a break from all the polite small talk and lil’s sick of people touching her tummy.” harry chuckled nodding to your pregnant sister who nodded in agreement. “how is my little niece or nephew doing?” you grinned happily, thumping yourself down beside her and looking at your sister with hopeful eyes as your brother ventured back outside.

“i already told you we’re not finding out the gender until the baby comes, nor will i be revealing any names!” your sister warned making you groan in annoyance, giving her a pout to which she just playfully shoved your head away.

“buzzkill. where’s oli then?” you asked, unable to spot your sisters husband anywhere. “work. he’s taken up every second weekend to try and help us save for the little one.” lily patted her stomach. “you know for some extra money we could capitolise on you being pregnant. i’m sure thats like a fetish or something somewhere.” you shrugged casually as your sister looked at you like you had four heads.

“i’m not even going to dignify that with a response god you are so weird!” your sister shook her head as you only grinned. “so how was your date then? i don’t see a ring!” she teased as you rolled your eyes. “is there anyone mum didn’t tell?” you huffed in annoyance at the ever meddling behaviours of her. “please you know her hairdresser, the market attendant and her nail lady are all rooting for you to find a husband or a wife soon.” that caused both of you to break out into a laugh.

“i date all the genders and yet here i am the only single sibling. i’m honestly shocked mums not tried to set me up with someone or sell me off like a prized cow yet.” you rolled your eyes with a smile.

“oh believe me she’s open to it! but you’re lucky she’s so gullible because i personally know you didn’t go on a date, you were just avoiding alessia.” lily quirked an eyebrow knowingly. “i was not!” you defended though you quickly abandoned that strategy at her firm gaze, seeing right through your lies.

“it didn’t work anyway she just came over afterwards.” you sighed as your sisters eyebrows raised. “oo did you two have hot hate sex?” lily asked as your eyes bugged and you smacked her on the arm. “what? of course not!” you scoffed in offence with a deep seeded frown.

“please if you think i didn’t know the two of you were more than friends once upon a time then you’re even more of a moron than i thought. harry and i have known for years!” your sister chuckled as your mouth formed a small o in shock at the reveal.

“how?” you questioned with a frown. “well firstly because you didn’t just deny it-“ she started as you groaned. “and secondly you were both horrible at sneaking around. the shared love bites alone were enough, you’re just lucky mums so oblivious.” she chuckled as you sighed, head thumping back on the pillow.

you’d told her way back then that both you and alessia had decided not to be friends anymore after she kept going to college from you, but you’d never told her the true nature of your relationship.

“why didn’t you ever tell me that you knew! especially after i came out!” you shoved her in annoyance. “i figured you’d want to leave it in the past. plus with dad and everything you had enough going on without the added stress.” her voice softened as you nodded.

“so she came over afterwards? are you two working it out then?” lily asked curiously as you shook your head firmly. “not like that. but we are slowly working on building a friendship back.” you revealed as your sister squeezed your shoulder in a silent understanding.

“well that’s nice then. but come on, if we don’t go and mingle soon i fear mum will send in a search party.” your sister rolled her eyes before you helped her up, the two of you making your way outside, greeted by cheers as you were passed from old family friend to friend giving pleasantries and half sincere smiles.

and that’s exactly how alessia found you as the russo’s arrived, the sun already setting as they made their way around the side of the house, gio and luca bickering as mario warned them to drop it.

they were a little later than everyone else, as arsenal had just won 4-1 with a lunchtime fixture much as alessia had encouraged her family to come here and she would meet them later they never missed a match where they could and she was grateful for their undying support.

as her family dispersed to greet everyone alessia’s eyes of course found you first, a soft smile coming to her lips as she watched your head go back with a laugh at something.

long gone were the days the two of you would hide away from everyone up in your room, it had seemed time had busted you right out of your shell as the blonde watched you effortlessly and confidently engage in conversations with everyone, joking around and waving your hands about as you clearly told some sort of story which had the group around you in stitches.

but well aware that the two of you were trying to go slow alessia chose purposefully not to go to you first, instead making her way around to those who she knew saying hello. she found herself engaged in a heated conversation with her brothers and a few of her dads friends about the match which just passed, playfully taking the mick out of them for the fact they were spurs supporters and that’s who she’d just beaten.

“lessi darling have you eaten anything since you played?” your mum interrupted, grabbing her arm with a smile as alessia shook her head. “well we can’t have that. come with me!” alessia laughed as she was lovingly dragged inside where the rest of the food was, chatting away with the older woman as she piled a plate high with it.

“mum for god sakes stop force feeding people!” alessia’s head turned as you appeared, stepping through the back door with a playful roll of your eyes. “she hasn’t eaten and she’s just played a full match! let your mother be a mother would you.” the older woman swatted at you as you grinned,

“heard you lost, what a shame.” you sighed toward the older girl who rolled her eyes. “no it’s not like golf, remember the team with the most goals wins!” alessia quipped back, thanking your mum with a kiss on the cheek as the woman placed a stacked plate of food in front of her.

“boring.” you shrugged, sending her a smile and offering her a drink which she accepted, your mum excusing herself back outside. “you went to a sold out semi final of the world cup without even knowing the rules of the game, and as an english woman. you’re lucky you didn’t get your head kicked in on the train home!” alessia laughed after she’d swallowed a mouthful of food.

you chuckled at that and retorted that you were not anyone’s favourite person that next day at school especially your very torn up very australian students. but the comment did have you thinking back to that night, where you had to see her for the first time in years and she didn’t even know you were there.

your coworkers had all but dragged you to the match, and despite not being a football fan you didn’t live under a rock. you knew alessia was in the england squad, your social media had been drowned in friends and family all posting and sharing about the teams extremely successful tournament.

englands love and pride for football ran deep and despite being in another country it seemed you just couldn’t escape the beloved strikers face following you around.

it had been the same for the euro’s however you’d been able to try and avoid that as much as you could with that not being something many australians bothered about. but with this tournament happening on the same soil you worked and lived on, it had become ten times harder to ignore it.

it had taken two days of stress and panic for you to actually come to terms with the fact that you’d be seeing her again, even from hundreds of metres away up in the stands, kept safe by the four walls of the corporate box you were all being treated to. your coworkers had forced you into a matilda’s jersey however you made a point of buying an england scarf as to not entirely betray your home country.

it had comforted you to know that at least alessia wouldn’t know you were there, and unlike every other time you’d supported her at a match in the past her eyes wouldn’t meet yours with a cheeky grin and a point in your direction when she scored.

that didn’t however stop you from cheering when she did, you were after all still very proud of the team and knew what this would do for womens sports even if you weren’t personally a die hard football fan. the cheers which were very quickly silenced by the murderous glares of the australians surrounding you in the box.

“you wore an australian jersey?” alessia gasped in disbelief as you revealed that to her. “i was trying to fit in! i had an england scarf.” you defended yourself with a laugh, the two of you sat on opposite ends of the lounge after alessia had finished eating.

“traitor to your own country.” alessia tutted making you roll your eyes before the blonde let out a large yawn, quickly covering her mouth as her cheeks flushed red with embarrassment. “sorry!” she apologised, shaking her head as if to wake herself up a little.

“don’t be. i was actually going to head home pretty soon, do you want a lift?” you offered hesitantly, alessia assuring she didn’t want to be a bother. “you’re not, pretty sure everyone’s made a point to tell me you only live a few minutes down the road. and I’d like to get out of here before they break out the karaoke!” you joked as alessia couldn’t help but nod in agreement, accepting your offer.

it took the two of you a further hour to say your goodbyes, the time now ticking over past eight in the evening you accepted the boo’s and the jeer’s that you were bailing early, brushing them off with a smile and a hug.

promising carol you’d come over soon and see her properly you finally made a break for the exit, alessia following suit as you made a beeline out the door and toward your car.

“they don’t ever get tired of making the point we grew up and aren’t thirteen anymore huh?” you laughed as you both buckled up. “oh look at you! so grown up! so beautiful, looking just like your mother!” alessia cooed sarcastically, reaching over to squeeze your cheeks and shake your head back and forth as you laughed and swatted her away.

it was almost scary how easy it felt to slip back into this light banter with her, chattering away as if no time had passed it surprised you how effortlessly the chips had fallen into place.

though despite that your walls were still very much so up, and you knew there were certain topics of conversation you’d avoid with her, and you still wanted to take it slow.

“hey this is really random, and please feel free to say no. but do you want to go get ice cream? there’s a gelato place not far from my apartment and i’ve kind of been craving it lately.” alessia asked apprehensively, fiddling with her hands.

“weren’t you just yawning a few minutes ago?” you chuckled, not catching the way alessia’s face flickered into disappointment for a moment before a smile quickly tugged at her lips.

“but hey who would i be to say no to ice cream.”

~

“this is me just up here.” alessia pointed as you nodded, driving a little down the street until you found a park. “you really are quite close, i could have walked from my place.” you smiled as the two of you got out of the car.

“the winds picking up and it’s supposed to rain tomorrow you might want a jumper or something.” alessia noted as you nodded, opening the back door and frowning at the empty seats.

“oh my jacket!” you remembered with a groan as realised you’d left it at your mums house, and of course it was one of your favourites. “dressed inappropriately for the london weather, remember you’re not in australia anymore!” alessia teased as you closed your door with a huff.

“i had one! i left it at back at mums place.” you sighed, wrapping your arms around yourself as indeed the wind had picked up. “typical. wait here.” alessia rolled her eyes playfully, stopping herself from inviting you inside well aware that might be a little too soon.

“less its fine i’ll warm up as we walk!” you called after her but the stubborn blonde dismissed you with a wave, glad to be facing away from you as she hurried toward her front door, hiding the smile which wound its way onto her lips at you again not calling her by her full name.

progress.

“here.” the striker returned a few minutes later, holding out a large charcoal grey coat in your direction, having slipped on a hoodie underneath the puffer jacket she was wearing earlier and tied her hair back into a low bun.

“your arms are so long.” you shrugged it on with a huff and rolled up the ends of the sleeves making alessia laugh. “not my fault i had a growth spurt and you’re the same height as when you were twelve.” the blonde smirked causing you to push her with a roll of your eyes.

“i am not! i’m barely a head shorter than you.”

“wow i didn’t realise heads were a metre long.”

“at least i know the size of my own legs. i saw you fall over before!” you grinned, the blonde indeed having tripped over the leg of a chair and tumbled down to the ground, relentlessly ribbed by her brothers for it she had been grateful no one else had seen.

or so she thought.

“thank you though.” you spoke more sincerely, definitely grateful for the barrier from the icy sharp poke of the london evening wind.

as the two of you walked it took every single ounce of your restraint not to focus on the fact that the coat smelled like her and that her scent had changed over the years from how you remembered it.

no longer was it plagued with notes of bergamot and lavender, or her infamous green apple shampoo. now you found yourself drowned in the faint but still ever present aroma of what was likely a rather expensive perfume, much more floral and light but still with some woody undertones, like how the ground smelled in spring after it rained.

it seemed ridiculous to say but she smelled rich, and yet still just as ever alluring as she had when you were younger and you’d steal her hoodies. relishing in pretending that she was with you in bed on nights where the two of you had to be apart, the blonde away on some sort of football tournament or camp.

if anything that made it a little easier to just tell yourself it was someone else’s coat given the unfamiliar aroma, to delude your poor overworked mind that you didn’t notice that you could still find yourself in a drunken haze on how intoxicatingly comforting it felt to wear her clothes, which had always hung off of you in the most ridiculous ways given your height difference.

because you wouldn’t dare to fall back into that trap, you couldn’t.

“can i try that one please?” alessia asked politely with a smile, pointing to a rocky road flavour as your eyes surveyed the counter, biting down on your bottom lip as your options ticked over in your head.

“oh yum. hey try this.” she nudged your shoulder with hers and held out the half eaten spoon toward you without a second thought. you knew she hadn’t meant anything by the casual gesture, the two of you had always shared food or drinks without a care.

but now, with your walls up and already struggling to pull your head out of the hazy fog caused by the fact you were wearing her coat and drowned in her smell, the simple gesture felt far too familiar for you to accept.

so you shook your head, pushing it back toward her and avoiding her eyes you felt look toward you. “can i please get a scoop of the caramel peanut butter and one of the cake batter please? in a cup.” you requested with a smile toward the young girl serving you.

“can i get a scoop of the rocky road and the cookies and cream please? in a cone.” alessia ordered her own, moving toward the counter as you were preoccupied with reading all the other weird and wacky flavours in the small but seemingly busy shop.

with you distracted she wasted no time paying for both of them with a simple tap, thanking the girl and grabbing both her cone and your cup, chuckling at your sweet tooth and making her way to you.

“that’s not fair! you payed for coffee too.” you scowled once you realised what she’d done, the two of you sitting down on a small table outside. “you can pay next time then.” alessia smiled over her ice cream causing you to roll your eyes.

“so do you have a busy week? though that’s probably quite a stupid question given your job.” alessia asked and quickly clarified with a sheepish chuckle.

“you’re not wrong. but they’re actually a great group of kids, a couple i have to keep an eye on but i love teaching them at this age. they’re just starting to learn and develop opinions and big feelings and watching that and encouraging it is so rewarding. much as those big feelings can sometimes be very overwhelming.” you laughed and suddenly realised you were rambling, a slight blush covering your cheeks.

“sorry. but no my weeks okay? I actually have monday off because they have an excursion and i drew the lucky card of not having to chaperone.” you sighed happily, as much as you did adore your class to wrangle over 40 kids in an environment outside of the school was often a nightmare, so you weren’t upset at missing out and having a three day weekend.

“did you really draw cards?” alessia asked with an amused smile. “no we draw names out of a hat.” you teased before explaining there was a rotating roster of which grade teachers had to attend each excursion.

“but a three day weekend means rory is dragging me out tomorrow night. which feels illegal given it’ll be a sunday!” you chuckled with a shake of your head, your long time friend forever trying to harass you into going out with her had meant she’d capitalised on this opportunity as soon as you’d make the mistake of mentioning it.

“what about you?” you switched the focus back to alessia who paused to swallow her mouthful of ice cream. “a few of the england girls are around london for an award show tonight so we’re going out tomorrow night to catch up. though for some reason they’ve decided to let tooney plan it so god knows what we’ll end up doing!” alessia rolled her eyes with a smile.

“award show? look at you, the little football mad girl from Kent going from mud wrestling and slumming it in the boys team to living it up in london rubbing elbows with celebrities.” you grinned as the two of you decided to start walking back.

“hardly, it feels so odd. people knowing who you are, wanting your attention or an autograph, knowing you’ve made their day even just by giving them a wave. you ride out the highs but then there’s the lack of privacy and all the media assumptions and the news articles and the criticism of every single match. i’m so incredibly grateful for all of it but sometimes its a little much.” alessia admitted with a sigh.

“i’m sorry i can’t even begin to imagine how that feels.” you empathised with the taller girl with a small frown. “i don’t even think i know how it feels. one day it’s the best job ever and you’re getting silverware and praise and the next you miss one kick and feel like you’ve let an entire country down.” alessia continued with a wince.

“social media would really make it worse huh.” you winced along with her at the thought of the millions of trolls which could hide behind the anonymous natures of theirs accounts. “god you have no idea. it was really bad when all the contract negotiations were going on with united before i moved to arsenal.” alessia sighed as you listened intently.

“everyone was telling me what to do or assuming what i was doing and that would lead to another news article speculating about my future and suddenly everyone feels the right to tear down everything. my football, my family, my weight, my appearance, everything. and it felt like i couldn’t escape it anywhere, even my own teammates were questioning what i was doing and where i was going if not with united but without a contract signed with arsenal yet because of the transfer window i legally couldn’t tell anyone what was happening.” alessia vented, the two of you finishing your ice creams as you dumped your empty cup in a nearby bin.

“sorry! that was…look its in the past. but yeah, social media sucks.” alessia caught herself becoming overtly emotionally at the memories and quickly breezed over them. “hey that sounds awful and i’m really sorry you had to go through that, but less don’t diminish the fact it felt horrible. people can be so cruel and cowardly on social media.” you grabbed her arm and gave her a smile so soft it had alessia’s knees wobbling.

“thank you. if anything nowadays it just drives me to train harder and play better, the best way to shut them up is by proving them wrong.” alessia shrugged, wrenching her eyes away from yours for fear of drowning in them.

“wow well it’s comforting to know all those years of torture kicking footballs at my head was worth it then.” you smiled bumping your shoulder into her. “mmm yeah using you for target practice really paid off, thanks!” she bumped you back with a grin as the two of you arrived to your car.

“text me when you get home safe yeah?” alessia asked with a slight frown as you nodded, unlocking your car and shrugging off her coat, folding it neatly and handing it back to her. “they have these crazy things called heaters in cars now.” you joked before she could offer for you to keep it, not wanting to entertain the thought.

“thank you, that was nice. catching up and stuff!” alessia smiled, rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet. “yeah it was.” you agreed sharing her thought, as nice as it could be for exes who suddenly decide after six years to try and be friends, nothing weird or hard about that at all.

a silence fell between the two of you, both sizing the other up and very clearly unsure how to end things. did you hug? did you both just part ways? did you say goodbye?

you both obviously picked up on the slightly awkward tension and chuckled shyly, and then with a few more moments of silence alessia decided to go for it well aware of a potential rejection.

she stepped toward you and opened her arms slightly, clearly hesitant as you paused. but then your arms were wrapped around her and your face was pressed into her chest and alessia held her breath for fear if she even moved slightly you might disappear.

your body filled with a warmth you’d not felt in years as her taller form wrapped around you in a tight hug, the double layers of clothing covering her only bringing more comfort as you could have melted into her.

but your walls suddenly sprang back up and you pulled away, sending her a rushed smile and a quick goodbye before slipping into your car as she made her way to her front door, watching as your car pulled off and disappeared around the corner.

busy driving you failed to see your phone light up with a notification as you turned your music louder to try and distract your mind from overthinking.

@alessiarusso99 has requested to follow you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

chapter nine

[darth-jess]

GalaxyCon 2024: Meeting Hayden Christensen

I have never been someone who cares about famous people. To clarify: I care about them as human beings, like in a very general sense, the way I'd care about any other person I've never met before. I also don't really care to know much about the personal lives of my favorite famous people. For me, at least, knowing things about them can change the way I look at the characters they play, the music they write, or the art they make. And personally, I like to view these things in my own context, not within someone else's.

Because of this, I have never really become obsessed with any particular famous person. I've become obsessed with their art– their portrayal of a character, their music, their writing, etc… but never with the actual person. Why would I? I've never met them before, I don't know them, I don't know what they're like as real people.

So I never really understood those fangirls who scream or faint or start sobbing when they get to meet the Jonas Brothers or Taylor Swift. I totally did not get it.

Then, I got to meet Hayden Christensen this past weekend at GalaxyCon.

And let me tell you, emotional fangirls, I get it now.

I have never been to a con before, this was my first one ever and honestly I don't think any future con I go to will top this one.

I knew going into it I was going to be a little nervous. After all, even though (as I stated before) I don't really care about the actors who play my favorite characters, I can absolutely appreciate how much their acting affected me, how much the role they played on screen changed my own life, as well as their skill as an artist.

And because Anakin Skywalker has been my favorite character in all fiction since I was 6 years old– and has not changed since then– I was very excited. The only favorite characters I had before Anakin were Darth Vader (when I found out they were the same my 4-year-old brain nearly exploded) and Ariel from The Little Mermaid. I was 3 when The Phantom Menace came out, give me a break.

Anyway.

Waiting in line for the photo op on Saturday gave me so much excited anxiety, I felt light headed and a little sick to my stomach– and the entire time my husband was kind of making fun of me (not in a mean way, mind you, he was making me laugh). I kept telling him, "I'm too nervous, I want to go home!" – which wasn't true, but for some reason I kept saying it.

The photo op was super quick, I remember Hayden saying something nice, like "Nice to meet you" or something like that (or maybe I said that?). I only had time to hand Hayden the Anakin Skywalker replica lightsaber I'd gotten the day before and ask him to hold it! I think he said something else, but I literally don't remember because I sort of blacked out.

I barely remember taking the picture.

Then, later in the day, we waited in line for two hours (it was worth it) to get his autograph and the entire time I was trying to stay calm because I was worried that when we got to him I would just stare at him blankly, unable to say anything.

The line was soooo long, and he was sort of blocked off behind these curtains– I think the curtains are there as much for him as they are for the fans. I imagine if he could've seen how long the line was, he would've wished for Anakin's robotic arm to do all those autographs. I would have, for sure.

When we were ushered through the curtains I could literally feel every single beat of my heart, I could hear it in my brain. I felt lightheaded again, and I turned to my husband and said, "I think my heart is going to explode."

Something I noticed as we got closer was that even though he looked kind of tired, he was still nice to every single person in line and made every interaction special. I have no idea how many autographs he'd already done that day– hundreds at least– and he was still trying to talk to everyone who'd come to see him.

Finally, we got to Hayden and he looked me right in the eyes (and like holy aslkdfj that gaze is intense– NICE, but intense) and he said something like, "How are you today?"

And I said, "I'm good, how are you? It's so nice to meet you!"

I have no idea what he said after that because my heart was beating SO LOUD, but he said something nice in response.

And then I finally remembered what I wanted to tell him, so I said, "Anakin was always my favorite character."

He smiled real big while he was signing our poster, and he said, "Thank you, that means a lot to me!"

I wanted to say more, like:

"How much of yourself do you feel like you put into Anakin's character?" – This is something I'm always curious about, because as a writer I feel like I put so much of myself into my writing.

Or:

"I hope we get to see you in more Star Wars projects!"

Or even just:

"I'm so happy you're getting the recognition you deserve."

But I was honestly lucky I'd been able to speak at all, and at this point, nothing else was coming out. And I was slightly worried that if I spoke again I'd say something weird or not make any sense at all.

So my husband took over, and he held up the photo we'd taken earlier from the photo op and said, "Thanks for making me look like the third wheel!"

And Hayden laughed– he actually laughed– and made some kind of joking reply but I sort of blacked out there too because I was so embarrassed!

Finally, my husband said what I'd really wanted to say, "We're just really happy to see you finally getting the recognition you deserve."

And Hayden smiled and nodded, and said, "Really, thank you guys so much, that means a lot."

And then he shook our hands and said it was nice to meet us, and it was time to go. We walked out, and I had tears in my eyes, my heart was still racing, and my whole body was shaking. I turned to my husband as I held onto his arm and I said, "I literally can't feel my legs."

Moral of the story: Hayden Christensen is literally so nice to his fans, so if you ever get the opportunity to meet him, I highly recommend it. He's not going to remember the interaction, but I guarantee you will for the rest of your life.

Also, don't judge fangirls for getting emotional.

[alldoll3dup]

໑୧﹒★﹒Veneer crushing on you - one-shot ᰍ﹒∿

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 - You are an artist well known for your impeccable works and Veneer really appreciates your work, perhaps even too much (the troll thing didn't happen here)

𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐦 - Trolls

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 - GN!Reader, fluff

- Well it all started when Veneer was bored scrolling through Instagram

- Until something caught his attention, it was a painting, very well done by the way, so he decided to do a little stalking on the page

- As time passed, Veneer began to like the paintings of the famous Y/N more and more he admired his work

- As he really wanted to meet you, but couldn't appear at public events because of fans and paparazzis, he had the idea of hiring you to do art for him

- His sister Velvet, on the other hand, thought it was an unnecessary waste of money

- When you were going out on the street you were stopped by one of Veneer's advisors who gave you an offer you couldn't refuse, it was A LOT of money for just one painting and of course you accepted

- Then he gave you the time and place, was it the Velvet and Veneer brothers' mansion? You were perplexed, you didn't know how but you got noticed by your favorite stars you couldn't miss the chance to impress them (especially Veneer)

- You showed up at the agreed place and time and you saw Veneer waiting for you there, you were emotional, but maintained your posture you were just there to paint after all

- When Veneer sees you he immediately smiles and greets you in a way you didn't expect

"Oh my god, you are Y/N in the flesh! I was so looking forward to meeting you up close" - you immediately felt a blush on your cheeks as Veneer shook your hand gently

"I think I was the one who should say this, you're a super pop star and I'm honored to finally meet you" - Veneer practically melted, did you follow his work? It could only be a dream

"D-Do you follow the music i do?" - you laugh a little confused

"Of course! Your songs inspire me, I thought it was obvious" - you see Veneer become totally embarrassed and blushed

"I am inspired by your arts to make music" - you look like two fools exchanging shy glances and silly smiles and Velvet appears looking at you with a certain contempt

"UHHH Get a room lovebirds ew" - she screams loudly as Veneer turns even redder taking you to another place

"Y/N, I'm sorry about Vel, she doesn't know what she's saying" - he says covering his face in shame

"It's okay, I think I'd better start painting now, since that's why I came here, what do you want me to paint?" - you give a small smile, arranging the materials

"I want you to paint me and you together holding hands in the most beautiful place you can imagine" - you nod awkwardly starting the painting while Veneer watches while you doing it

- After a while you finally finish the painting, you and Veneer together in a sunset on the beach, a painting so detailed that it is impressive

- Veneer smiles with the painting in his hands and he hangs it on the wall, turning his attention to you

"You know... we could uh... do this in real life, what do you think?" - he says a little unsure thinking you would refuse him, scratching his head lightly trying not to be so anxious

"Of course! I would love to Veneer" - you say with a slight smile and Veneer hugs you excitedly, already thinking about the thousands of things you will do together

- After some time getting to know each other better and becoming friends, you actually go to the beach together recreating the painting of you two at sunset on the beach

- But with something more, Veneer puts his hand on yours and with his free hand he gently holds your face giving you a little kiss that left you blushing so with a smile on his face he asks you

"Do you want to date me Y/N?"

▐ Hello yall! Hope you liked this little one-shot of this silly lovely guy, if you got any requests send it ♡

▐ Sorry if there are any grammatical errors love you guys ^^

[strxbrymochi]

i know im quite late but this has been stuck in my head and i need to get it out so here are my 12am impulse thoughts,,,

how i imagine nct dream would be on valentine's day;

note: this is just the vibes i get from seeing them and 100% based on my delusional imagination

mark;

i am extra delulu for this man rn its so bad

i feel like he would be such a wholesome valentine date

straight up imagined some sort of serenading going on bc hello guitar skills?? and his voice??

i'd imagine he'd gift you some sort of designer thing (just cause i think he's the type to spoil u for special occasions bc ur his girl yk screams)

i think good food = good talks = just enjoying each other's company; type of guy i genuinely feel like you can have hour hour hours long convos and not get bored

lots of laughs bc hearing his laugh >>>

feel more home date vibes where you take out your fave foods and just jam out love songs in pjs but i can also see late night walks or going to some lowkey resto so yalls dont get spotted

renjun;

this guy is for real a deep down romantic aint no way with that face and attitude have you seen how he speaks to some of the dreamies??

defs would serenade u if u ask him to (imagine him shy at first but giving it his all aww)

hands down will gift u something he custom made i do not doubt this given he made custom hoodies for the rest of dream but yours defo will be extra special and made with care <3

can imagine some sort of art date or a quiet night for the two of yalls, him spoiling u a bit cause valentines is extra reason to do so

honestly if i was on a date w him i'd just stare at him ... oops

i think u guys should do the "draw each other" trend as a gift and ur drawing of him looks horrendous (bc u are not as gifted in the arts-- if you are good for u) while his of you looks majestic but he keeps it anyways bc u made it (hearing his beautiful laugh makes it worth ut too anyways)

jeno;

ok look i think jeno's v acts of service-y

wouldn't question if he attempts to cook for you or do things for you a lot more often on valentines to show his love for u (wake up to meals and a clean house yessir-- only for today tho GAHAHAHAHA)

another one i think would spoil you with designer stuff and just imagine the little cute smile on his face when he watched you open the gifts cause he's out here looking at u w pure genuine love (must be nice)

my man's a gamer would probs challenge u to a game or two before heading out

ice cream !!!!!! i have seen 2 vlogs w him looking for and eating ice cream i think you guys will defs have an ice cream taster or smtg (he's so me!!)

idk bro i love jeno any boyfriend fantasy i have in my dreams is played out by him. TT

haechan;

nah yea atp they'd all spoil you (pls dream is full of loving green forest men)

i can imagine deep talks about your future together like wouldnt be surprised if mans doesnt just propose to you alr thats how much he loves you

clingy clingy boy and he is not afraid to show you and let you know how much he loves u !

would hands down take you to the BEST restos and yalls would have insanely good food

can see some karaoke or bowling or idk just an activity yalls can do together before going home for a quiet night of the talks and just enjoying each other's presence

where do i find one genuine question

jaemin;

royalty treatment all the way

breakfast in bed: check with four course meal, flowers: check, gifts: check, chore-free house: check say less

i feel like jaemin is a very big words of affirmation guy so he will not stop complimenting you or saying he loves you

takes a lot of pictures of you too

yk also i think he'd actually send his mom flowers for valentine's day too

staring at you for hours with that stupid cute grin of his, eyes full of adoration

would have all your wants and preferences memorised hes so attentive you actually dont need to worry or do anything all day (just appreciate it bc u deserve him and his love!!!)

chenle;

(there were like no chenle gifs wtf)

PRESIDENT ZHONG CHENLE!!!!! money moves fr name what u want and u got it, spoiled level 1000 on valentine's day

if he could go around freely i think he's the type to take you to fancy ass restaurants like those rich hotel ones (but like if not that's ok he'll spoil you through other means)

he's a menace sometimes i think he'd joke around and try to get on your nerves a bit for fun like imagine him rocking up and being like what day is it today? oh it's valentine's? what's that idk what that is. was i meant to do smtg for u? (him and haechan fr would be the type to tease u so bad) all that just for laughs i can alr imagine the look on his face

as sweet as he is i think at one point he'd either make you do smtg so stupid w him or get a random ass matching present just for the lols (he rlly doesn't gaf he's so real and u love him for it)

jisung;

my sweet sweet child (we're like the same age)

i feel like he'd be so babie trying to prep everything and making sure everything is perfect for u awwwie

tries to act all tough and cool but melts on the inside, compliment him once he shows that smile of his and he's down forever

would be the type to get advice from his hyungs on what to do but be so shy when asked (sksks hes adorable pls)

i feel like he would make you a custom gift like something you can take w u always but also get u something expensive idk unless ur not into that stuff GAHAHA

IMAGINE he tries cooking for u but oblivious kiddo ended up burning it but its ok he tried, yalls got takeout instead

OK ALSO think him trying to teach u how to dance that'd be so cute or yalls can end it w a movie just in each other's presence and u fall asleep next to each other on the couch (BYE SO CUTE IM DED)

ok that's it im done i need to sleep good night (stay delulu besties <3)

[arrowmance]

[ ♥ ] 𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝟑, 𝟑𝐑𝐃 𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑

This letter is directed to... Leviathan, the Avatar of Envy. To the demon who I've fallen for, despite the distance.

❥ back to the masterlist : upcoming, 4th letter

Dear Leviathan,

It's been raining here in the human realm, aren't you cold? Because I know how difficult it is when you're alone shivering. Haha, get that joke? No? Okay.

Seriously, I've had a lot of friends out of reach, and the distance between us is... indescribable. Alright, do not come at me for how I portray my feelings, nor how my thoughts not making sense right now but, please, listen.

Call me a creep all you want, but I took note of our conversation the last time you called.

It was counterintuitive to make a call in the bathroom. Perhaps the first time around, it felt like a miracle. I was so used to being the one calling you when it's night time at this place, so imagine my surprise when you called me in the morning even.

And you didn't usually start the conversation how you do. Don't get the wrong idea it's not like you were being completely out of character or being overbearing or annoying, but it's the first question you asked:

"It's been raining here since you left, is it cold there?"

YES. OH MY FUCKING GOD, it has been very VERY cold since I left your place. Look, it's good to be home, like I missed this place, but oh my Diavolo did I miss all of you.

Especially my best friend, my full-time homie, my lifetime partner.

Because, if I'm being honest? Being alone sucks. And it's been so long since I've had someone that I was comfortable sharing my interests with, because...

We're both losers, aren't we? We're nothing more that losers in love. And yet, thinking about it just makes me all the more excited. I can't escape how while you keep describing yourself as this shut-in, good-for-nothing, useless otaku, but all I see is someone who does what he loves. Someone with no shame in screaming to this world and announce a passion. Didn't you realize half of the population don't even have the balls for that?

Really, it's endearing.

It's a great way to survive hell, and I'm glad I got to know you better. I'm glad you introduced me to TSL, and Ruri Tunes, and tens and thousands more of games and anime from your collection. I'm still catching up, barely making even 1/4 of that list, but you got good taste. And... aaaa...

I should've written about being a "Professional Avatar of Sins comforter" in that one essay instead…but hopefully, you would appreciate the little honorable mention you had in the written work.

"As much as I didn't have only 1 hobby, Leviathan sparked my interest in gaming like I'm a child again. Well, I'm actually grateful for that, so I'll thank the Otaku for now making it somewhat one of my hobbies." 

Gods, I sound like some sick teenager. So, hear me out, what if I did tell you I've fallen? And I like the way you play games and endless rants of the things you're most passionate about?

My heart skipped a beat at the sudden tune of "My Chance!" vibrating from my phone atop the plastic table, and you just had to let me release this part of me that I didn't even realize I have. Really, I'd do anything to see those familiar orange eyes and purple strands, running my fingers and combing your Justin Bieber style bowl cut (that you wear better).

“I’m not ready to save myself from the embarrassment that is talking like a lot already," you probably once said. "Just for you to not hear anything and I have to repeat it all over again and that's pretty awkward since I forgot what I said earlier or did I even say anything worth your time? Ahh I can’t believe I just wasted your time-”

I'd listen.

I'd echo this sentiment a million times on the stereo. I'd listen.

So when I look out when it rains, I find north.

Because I'd get to imagine the distance shorter, guided by that northern path. Whether I'm on the South, East or West, you'll be the one I'm looking for.

And if I don't make sense now? That's good, you'll figure it out eventually. Because there was never anyone else who synced with my thoughts like the rhythmic beats of my heart.

My player one, thank you.

Happy Holidays from here, and when it rains, I'll always remember you. While I'm here, alone. Shivering.

Thank you so that, even when the stars are gone, I'd have the rain.

I'd have you.

With love, Your Happy Place

© 𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄 2024. do not copy, modify, or repost any work as your own.

december 3rd, 2024 | wave dividers by cafekitsune

[midnightlizard]

hey, could you please do a Amelia Shepherd x fem!reader where the reader is jealous because of Edwards and Amelia reassures her that she only loves her etc...? (they've been together for about 3years)

Jealousy

Amelia Shepherd x gn!reader

Summary: when someone constantly tries to get at your girlfriend it can be irritating, very irritating, but thankfully Amelia doesn't care about anyone else.

Warnings: sexual talk at the end but nothing happens

A/N: I combined this with another request, ("Amelia Shepherd x reader where an intern keeps looking at Amelia in a OR and reader gets mad")

also because I don't write fem reader I changed it to gn reader

Word count: 1247

-

-

It happened again.

You and Amelia had another surgery together.

Which is great, you loved working with your girlfiend. You two operated on different parts of the human body so whenever the rare opportunity of working together presented itself, you always took it. This man had a puncured lung so you had to act quickly and asked the neurosurgeon to make sure the brain never stopped receiving oxygen.

What you didn't particularly like was working with someone else.

Amelia chose Edwards to work on this man with her, because of course she did. Your girlfriend was an excellent surgeon so you trusted her judgment and never tried to change her mind about her residents.

You just wish she did about this one resident.

Edwards wasn't bad at her job per se, but it just bugged you how her attention was half on your girlfriend and only half on the things she was supposed to be learning. It was highly unprofessional.

"right answer Edwards" Amelia chirped from behind her mask after the woman correctly answered her question.

"thank you, doctor Shepherd" you rolled your eyes at that, you were surprised at how she even got it right, since she never stopped looking at her face.

Your feet were starting to ache for how long you've been standing but thankfully the surgery was almost over. "Edwards how's his blood pressure?" of course, she didn't hear you. So you repeated the question.

"uh" she hesitated for a second, probably because the vitals weren't written in Amelia's eyes "110 over 70" she turned her head to look at you, as if she was expecting a scolding "it's good" she added.

"yea I know that, I'm a surgeon" you bit back, your eyes never leaving your patient's lungs. Amelia gave you a look from her spot behind the man's head, but said nothing.

After a minute of silence you breathed out a sigh of relief as you could finally take your hands out of his chest.

"forceps and gauze" you weren't talking to Edwards this time, since it wasn't her job to hand you what you needed, but when your free hand still felt empty after a second and you were about to yell at the intern, he frantically shook his head and pointed at the assistant, who held the tools in her hand, while talking to your girlfriend.

"Edwards!"

You raised your voice to the point even Amelia furrowed her eyebrows at the shift in your behaviour. It wasn't loud enough to be called unprofessional, you have seen much worse under Bailey's guidance. But you were never one to scream without a valid reason, especially in an OR.

The woman instantly whipped her head to look at you with widened eyes, while her shoulders visibly tensed.

"I don't know if you have noticed since you've been staring at Dr. Shepherd all this time" you vaguely pointed at her, your other hand never leaving the chest tube, keeping it in place between your patient's lungs "but we are actually in the middle of an operation. So I'd really appreciate it if you gave me my tools so I can close him up and go tell his family he survived."

You clenched your jaw when silence fell into the room right after your words, only now realizing the tone of your voice. But you didn't regret it, not really.

Especially when your hand was still hanging empty in the air.

Truth was, Edwards didn't hear you the first time and was afraid to give you the wrong tools.

"forceps and gauze." you repeated, your voice lower but still firm "now."

"right yea, sorry"

- - - -

Once his wound was properly sealed and Amelia assured you his brain was completely fine, you instructed your interns to take him to his room and keep an eye on him, and quickly stormed off.

Stephanie took her mask off and approached her mentor with the intention of apologizing for her behavior, but Amelia stopped her, and went looking for you.

She found you in the waiting room, talking to the man's family. "no need to thank me, I just did my job" she could only see the back of your head but she knew you enough to recognise the smile in your voice. "your husband is strong and he's going to have a quick recovery"

Your girlfriend stopped behind you without interrupting your conversation, and kindly smiled at the family as they walked away.

"okay what was that?" she searched for your eyes once they were out of earshot.

"what?" you run a hand through your hair, finally free from the surgical cap "people hug us all the time" and it wasn't a lie, but you knew it wasn't what she was referring to.

"no, not that" she shook her head and crossed her arms.

You opened your mouth while your eyes moved around the room, but the only thing that came out of it was a sigh.

You sat down on one of the chairs, looking up at her "I don't, I don't like Edwards"

"she's good at her job" Amelia didn't waste time defending her resident, but her tone wasn't aggressive.

"I know that, I know she is" you took a big breath, trying to find the right words. This whole thing has been bugging you for months now and you never said anything because you didn't want to sound controlling or irritating. But you couldn't hide it anymore.

"I don't like how close she is to you."

Amelia uncrossed her arms and slid her hands inside her pockets. She had a feeling of where this was going.

"She's fascinated by your work and by your mind and I get it, I love it too. And I get that she wants to learn so she assists your surgeries but she follows you everywhere."

Somewhere along your words, Amelia took a step closer and was now standing between your legs, looking down at you.

"Every time I want to talk to you she's always there, we can't even have lunch together without her sitting with us and asking you questions."

One of her hands came up to rest on your cheek to make you look at her "you're jealous of Edwards?" and despite the amused tone, her smile seemed gentle.

"You don't have to be, (Y/N)" she continued after a small silence "she's interested in my work and yes, she asks a lot of questions. But it's just that"

She saw you shake your head and took both of your hands in hers "and even if it wasn't, I don't care. I'm your girlfriend, not hers. You're my partner, she's not. I'm sorry if it made you jealous, but there's really no reason to worry. I love you, just you, okay?"

You softly nodded your head, and your smile quickly mirrored her own when she squeezed your hands "okay. thank you"

"of course" she muttered. Then she pulled on your hands, pulling you up "come on, I think we need to get our heads off of it and I know just the place"

You chuckled at her words and raised your eyebrows "you want to have sex in an on-call room?"

Amelia's smile never left her lips, if anything, it only got bigger "yes, and please stop acting like it hasn't happened already" she shrugged her shoulders and started guiding you to the room "besides, I need to show you who I stare at all day"

Amelia Shepherd Masterlist - Grey's anatomy Masterlist

General Masterlist

[awriterinthenight]

"I'm Sorry"-Anthony Lockwood

Warnings: Swearing, Kissing, talks of gruesome death, small talk about abusive and abusive lovers, and arguing

"Why can't you just listen to me," I screamed while pacing in the kitchen.

"It wasn't that big of a deal, love," Anthony said, brushing off what I had been trying to tell him for the past hour.

I groan in frustration, "Maybe not to you, but to me it was," I say angrily at him, "I don't appreciate the fact that you can't put away your petty differences with Kipps, and not cause a massive scene in public," I say referring to earlier when Lockwood and Kipps had a run in with each other as we were leaving the archive. You would think two almost adults can just ignore each other and act civil, but alas no they can't. They both started insulting each other making their dumb jabs, as a crowd of people were watching, which gives our agency a bad rep.

He breathes out a sigh before speaking, "It was one time, and it wasn't like we started actually fighting each other," he says much to calmly for my liking.

"But, it wasn't just one time. You've done this before, and I know you'll do it again, no matter what I say," I yell raising my voice a bit, "You starting a contest of who can come up with the worse insult, gives our agency a bad reputation, since people will think that our head of the agency, is some asshole who has anger issues and can't talk to people," I say, a bit more bitterly than I mean to.

He starts to speak, but I cut him off, "Save your breath, I'm going to bed before I end up yelling at you all night," I say tired from our long day, and all of my yelling.

I head back to my room and lie on my bed. Maybe I was being a bit harsh, but I loved this agency. I didn't want to see us lose business and have to close down because Lockwood couldn't help but start a pissing contest when he ran into Kipps.

Eventually I fell into a dreamless sleep.

***

I was awoken by a knock on my door.

Please don't be Lockwood, please don't be Lockwood. I chanted in my head, not wanting to talk to him this early in the morning after our fight.

Luckily it was just Lucy waking me up to tell me to get ready for the day, since we were going to Satchell's to pick up supplies for tonight. I reluctantly got up after Lucy promised me coffee if I did.

I threw on basic clothes, consisting of jeans, one of my favorite shirts, and a jacket. Then I did my hair opting for (insert favorite hairstyle here), and makeup consisting of (insert makeup routine here).

When I was done I went downstairs to find Lucy waiting my the door. I was tugging my boots on and tying the laces on the second one when I saw Lockwood walking towards us. Not wanting to talk to him, I quickly exited the house, dragging Lucy with me.

"I knew you guys had a fight, but I didn't know it was so bad you're avoiding him now," she said, being generally concerned for me and Lockwood.

I took a heavy sigh before saying, "I'd rather not talk about it." Lucy just nods, understanding how I feel currently.

***

When me and Lucy arrive home, we find George and Lockwood preparing our stuff. I don't even look at Lockwood as I help George pack up our kit bags for the night. Lockwood tries to talk to me, but I brush him off, not wanting him to make me feel worse before a case.

Our cab ride was silent, except for George going over our research. I sat in the front seat tuning George out, since I had heard it all about a thousand times.

When we finally arrived at the old house we all get out, and let ourselves in, since the lady didn't want to be near the house, and just gave us the key instead. We started making tea going over the research one last time, and going over our plans. Originally me and Lockwood would be together, but George sensing the tension between us, switched it so I was with Lucy, and he was with Lockwood. Me and Lucy would take the basement, and Lockwood and George would take the second floor, since we determined the haunting was definitely not on the ground floor.

We split ways when the clock struck 6, and me and Lucy started our descent to the basement. I felt along the walls looking for something to jump out at me, as Lucy stood and listened for anything useful.

"You got anything Lucy," I asked after a few minutes.

She shook her head, "Not much, just what seems like a light sound that I can't make out coming from that wall," she said, pointing to the wall in front of her. I put my hand on the wall trying to feel something. My breathing started to slow, and it felt like my throat was being restricted.

It wasn't the worst, and I could still breath, so the source was most likely upstairs around the same area I was. "Do you remember the what room was above here," I ask, looking up at the ceiling.

"Uhh, I think it was a bedroom," Lucy said, quite unconfidently.

"Well let's hope Lockwood and George find it soon. The fact that I we can feel it from all the way down here doesn't seem like a good sign, and I definitely don't want to stick around to meet it's ghosts," I tell Lucy.

Suddenly we heard a loud thump from upstairs. Me and Lucy looked at each other, before running upstairs.

'Shit'

There at the top of the stairs was Lockwood slumped against the wall, his head lolling to the side, while George was fighting off the ghost in the other room. "Lucy go help George, I'll make sure Lockwood is alive," I say frantically.

Lucy follows my directions, running to help George. "Come on wake up," I kept repeating, while trying to shake Lockwood awake. After a minute or two of trying to wake Lockwood he was still in his comatose state. Lucy was now yelling out to me that they needed help. Lockwood was still breathing, and Lucy was in need of assistance, so I left Lockwood and ran towards the room where Lucy and George were.

"She isn't appearing as much, so we think we tired her out a bit, but hurry up and find the source," George uttered, urging me to find the source quick. I wasted no time feeling along the walls looking for the source. I felt a pull towards a certain spot. There was a little outline and what looked like an opening on the wall. I took out a pocket knife and cut at that part of the wall.

Once I got it open, unluckily for me, the ghost had come back almost ghost touching me, as Lucy quickly ran her rapier through the ghost. But even then she kept showing up again, and again. I pried my knife into the wall, opening a small part of it, where a necklace was hidden.

The second I touched the necklace I was hit by the feeling of not being able to breath, and was suddenly seeing the death play out. The ghost was a lady who had been murdered by what seemed to be an abusive lover, who strangled her to death with the necklace in my hands.

Suddenly the ghost was gone, and we all looked around in relief. Unfortunately we celebrated a bit too early because now she was in the hall closing in on Lockwood. I quickly pulled out the iron net, wrapping the source in it, before Lockwood could get ghost touched. She was only inches away from Lockwood as she disappeared.

I quickly dropped the source running towards Lockwood. I kept trying to shake him awake, and saying his name repeatedly hoping he would wake up. When his eyelids fluttered open I hugged him tight as he ran his fingers through my hair comfortingly.

"I'm alright, love. You got the source and I'm ok," he reassured me.

Lucy help out a hand saying, "Come on let's get out of here, and patch you up." Lockwood took her hand as I help him up, and then down the stairs where the night cab was waiting.

We made it home after a silent cab ride. Everyone tiredly put their rapiers and boots away. I was heading upstairs to my room, when I passed Lockwood who was just about to close the door to his room.

"I'm sorry," I said a bit quietly, "I shouldn't have yelled at you yesterday," I say, taking a step closer, so that I was in front of his room now only steps away from entering.

He turned around and slid his hand through my hair, "I'm sorry, love. You have nothing to apologize for, you were right I should be more mature about my encounters with Kipps, and I promise, no, I swear I will be more mature from now on," he promises me.

I move his hand so I can kiss the palm of his hand, "I'm just glad you're ok," I say softly.

We're now so close we can feel each other's breathes, as we look at each other. He closes the gap between us, pressing our lips together. The kiss is soft, and gentle as his hand stays in my hair, and the other goes to my waist.

"Why don't you stay in here tonight, if you want to," Anthony suggests as we pull apart.

I smile softly, "I would love to," I say, as he pulls me into his room.

[russellsppttemplates]

Hi, can i request a blurb about pierre where his gf suffers from chronic migraines? :( i need this in my life

Note: if you suffer from migraines, I hope you're feeling better!

Cw: migraines and theyr symptoms, emergency room

Work mixed with travelling to enjoy the last few moments alone with Pierre before the season began, which brought you very little sleep triggered a massive migraine. Pierre found you in your shared bedroom with all the curtains closed and covers pulled around you, already assuming you hadn't been feeling that well since you asked him for some painkillers on his way home from his training session.

"Amour, what's wrong?", he said at his regular voice tone that, right now, seemed like he was screaming, the groan you let out concerning him even more as he approached you. Searching for his hand on the mattress, you spoke quietly, "I'm having a terrible migraine", you explained, Pierre weighing out your options and opting to get some flannels from the bathroom a little soaked in cold water and resting them on your head.

"Do you want some snuggles? I don't want to make it worse for you though", he whispered, "yes, please. Just let me lay on this side so it doesn't hurt as much", you whispered back, having managed to drink the tea he made for you and appreciating how his fingers kept running lightly through your hair, his kisses on your head attempting to help the pain.

When morning came around and you were bent over the toilet, pouring the little food you managed to keep down out and the meds didn't seem to be working, Pierre took matters into his own hands, "I've seen your migraines before and they're never this bad", he said.

"Call Dr. Martin, her contact is on my phone", you whispered, wiping your mouth while he went to call your doctor. Coming back to you, Mick laced your fingers in his, "Dr. Martin said that we should go to the ER, she's on call today and can see you", he said, earning a small nod from you as he helped you to the bedroom.

Sitting you on the bed, he helped you rid of your clothes, his touch delicate and soft as he helped you change out of your top and into one of his comfortable hoodies and one of your sweatpants, "all done, my love, c'mon now, gently", he said as he helped you make your way downstairs to the car and carefully drove to the hospital.

The admission was pretty quick and after checking you, you were prescribed a stronger medication and while you waited for it to kick in, Pierre was holding you against him, checking every now and again with you on how you were feeling, giving you your juice and encouragung you to drink a little bit, his lips not leaving your skin for long as he peppered little kisses where he could reach.

When you were back home and feeling a lot better, actually able to keep the homemade soup down, you were cuddling on the sofa, your smaller headache allowing the quiet lullaby of one of your boyfriend's playlists to actually soothe you as you tried to show him how thankful you were for him, "I love you and I only want you to feel good, I'd do whatever it takes to make you feel better", he whispered lovingly.

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