#i’ve gotten into a flow and know how i want the story to progress which has really been helping me get my pages down

[c-nan]

taking y’all on my screenwriting journey bc i need to keep myself accountable. the goal is 85 pages!

this is what i got so far. 41 more in two weeks let’s go 🙏

[caltropspress]

RAPS + CRAFTS #34: Snotnoze Saleem

1. Introduce yourself. Past projects? Current projects?

I go by the name Snotnoze Saleem. So far, all projects under this alias have been released on Illuminated Paths, including the mixtape Intifada, the sister EPs Shards I & II, and the most recent EP Samizdat, all self-produced. I don’t want to give too much away as of right now since I prefer to announce music when it is fully complete, but I got a collab tape with an amazing producer coming up, and I’m always working on my own stuff.

2. Where do you write? Do you have a routine time you write? Do you discipline yourself, or just let the words come when they will? Do you typically write on a daily basis?

Any and everywhere. I used to have a routine where I would write on my lunch break at work, and then afterwards after smoking. I don’t particularly like employment, so I always had a source of agitation to pull from, however that routine has recently been shattered due to a layoff. But I’ve been slowly finding a new groove until the next source of daily annoyance gives me more ammo, and even without a job, there’s always something. I discipline myself by sitting down and saying, “I’m going to come up with at least a few bars here,” or, “I will find a pocket in this weird ass beat,” but during that window of discipline I’ll let the words come as they may. I make an effort to jot down interesting thoughts or turn of phrases every day, even as little as just two words that I think sound interesting when put together. I tend to feel panicky if I feel I haven’t written anything for a few days straight, which can happen.

3. What’s your medium—pen and paper, laptop, on your phone? Or do you compose a verse in your head and keep it there until it’s time to record?

It used to be strictly pen and paper because I thought it was more “official,” but as time progressed I found myself thinking in bars all throughout the day, and I found it much more convenient to just pull my phone out and type whatever it is that came to me. I don’t think I’ve ever kept a whole verse strictly in my head; I’d be too afraid of forgetting it.

4. Do you write in bars, or is it more disorganized than that?

Usually disorganized, and then I find a satisfying order and rhythm for recitation. A few times a song will be more focused and will come off as what you could say are logical thoughts, like my one song “A Foreign Army Invaded My Funeral Procession” from Shards II, but that wasn’t even on purpose. It kinda just came out that way.

5. How long into writing a verse or a song do you know it’s not working out the way you had in mind? Do you trash the material forever, or do you keep the discarded material to be reworked later?

Nah, I don’t trash anything - always keep it. I’ve used lines I’ve written years prior, or recycle entire verses on a new beat if I think it fits better. When I’m in that discipline window I mentioned earlier, I’ll just write whatever, doesn’t have to make sense (not like the finished version has to) or be on any type of beat or rhythm or cadence, just get the juices flowing. It’s usually pretty clunky at first, but once I’ve gotten used to the beat then I can make adjustments. If I’m working on a verse and I haven’t reached that breakthrough beyond, say, a week or two, then it may be time to move on to something else, but that doesn’t mean I’ll never go back to it again.

6. Have you engaged with any other type of writing, whether presently or in the past? Fiction? Poetry? Playwriting? If so, how has that mode influenced your songwriting?

I used to write screenplays when I was younger, and little short stories. I don’t know what happened as I aged, but I find it hard to write organized thoughts and sentences like that nowadays - you know, “proper” sentences. I think the biggest influence it has on me now is just the fact that I’m not a stranger to the act of writing my thoughts down since I’ve been doing it for a while in some shape or form. I would like to read more poetry as well.

7. How much editing do you do after initially writing a verse/song? Do you labor over verses, working on them over a long period of time, or do you start and finish a piece in a quick burst?

The production plays a big role in this. If I have a beat that really gets a strong reaction from me, like my blood starts boiling as soon as I hear it, I can knock out a big chunk of a verse quickly, or maybe even a whole verse. Other times, it’s just a matter of reciting it either out loud or in my head over and over and over and over and over again until I’m fully satisfied with every word and pocket.

8. Do you write to a beat, or do you adjust and tweak lyrics to fit a beat?

Always writing to a beat, though I may pull from the random thoughts and feelings I’ve jotted down during my day-to-day. But the beat is usually the biggest factor in helping with writing a verse as opposed to little blurbs. If it’s something crazy, like some clamorous buzzsaw synth with a vocal sample of an elderly woman gasping or something, then the words will match that atmosphere. If it’s something calmer, I will adjust accordingly.

9. What dictates the direction of your lyrics? Are you led by an idea or topic you have in mind beforehand? Is it stream-of-consciousness? Is what you come up with determined by the constraint of the rhymes?

Man, I will pull from anything. My immediate surroundings, maybe a sign I see on the street; or something someone said earlier that I thought was funny or strange; a memory; a feeling I had at a particular moment; a meme or tweet I saw online; the news; a sentence from a book; whatever. Despite the seeming randomness though, I think there are always a handful of topics in my mind that I tend to dwell on or go back to, and it seems like I attempt to compile those disparate sources to fit within those topics even if I didn’t really set out to do that when I started. 

10. Do you like to experiment with different forms and rhyme schemes, or do you keep your bars free and flexible?

Hmm, those seem like the same thing to me. I would say I do both. Lately I’ve been making a conscious effort of trying not to use “obvious” rhymes, so instead of rhyming, for example, “feature” with “creature,” maybe I’ll go with “people” or even “facetious” or something. See, it doesn’t really rhyme, but it kinda does and you can make it work. I think that makes it more interesting. Nothing wrong with “obvious” rhymes though - more of an exercise to keep my mind sharp. 

11. What’s a verse you’re particularly proud of, one where you met the vision for what you desire to do with your lyrics?

I mentioned a collab tape with a producer earlier. I got a song on there that I really think I left the planet on. I wrote it when I was bedridden with COVID, and I think the combination of my brain being in such a vulnerable state and the beat really speaking to me helped with my writing. Don’t get COVID, by the way. Of the stuff I have out at the time of this writing, I like the song “Embryonic” from Shards II. It’s a kind of spoken word thing over a noise sample. I like hearing what different people think I was going for on that one.

12. Can you pick a favorite bar of yours and describe the genesis of it?

That’s a really tough one. It might be recency bias because it just came out, but I like when I said, “Bantustan bandit back on that bolshevik bullshit.” I like the alliteration and I enjoy using political terms in a somewhat irreverent way. “Bantustan” is in reference to the areas in the West Bank that are designated for Palestinians, which have been compared to the Bantustans of Apartheid-era South Africa, which were designated for black Africans; “bandit” in reference to flippant use of samples; and “bolshevik bullshit” because I guess my raps tend to lean pretty left-wing.

13. Do you feel strongly one way or another about punch-ins? Will you whittle a bar down in order to account for breath control, or are you comfortable punching-in so you don’t have to sacrifice any words?

I don’t think I have any authority to tell people how they should or shouldn’t rap. 99.9% of the time I don’t use them because I just don’t need to, and it makes a song easier to perform. But on my song “Nymphs” off of Samizdat (where the line I highlighted in the last question is from), I actually punched-in most of the lines because I was inspired by people like RXKNephew who I feel do it in a unique way, and I just thought it fit the beat. Just seemed like a fun thing to try out. But I don’t really whittle anything down. I have good breath control and sometimes it could even give it more flavor when it sounds like your lungs are about to burst before you finish a line. 

14. What non-hiphop material do you turn to for inspiration? What non-music has influenced your work recently?

Novels of all types, although my favorite authors are ones who can be funny about very serious things - satirical, you know - or know how to play with the English language. The real world. History and politics. Jazz music helps me with finding flows because it is so free and organic. And I really love noise and punk music for the energy.

15. Writers are often saddled with self-doubt. Do you struggle to like your own shit, or does it all sound dope to you?

I like what I put out. It’s not lost on me that many people may find my style outlandish and maybe even unlistenable - that’s okay. It sounds like me and whoever it’s meant for will find it and enjoy it. 

16. Who’s a rapper you listen to with such a distinguishable style that you need to resist the urge to imitate them?

Well, the flow on “Nymphs” was done on purpose as a direct tribute, but otherwise I think I’m weird enough as a person (in a good way) that I can take influence from my favorites such as DOOM or ELUCID and it would still come out sounding like me, if that makes sense. 

17. Do you have an agenda as an artist? Are there overarching concerns you want to communicate to the listener?

I would like to show the listener that rap is a limitless genre and the best genre and the culmination of all genres, where you can say whatever you want, however you want, and that you can really make a beat out of anything. Real-world concerns would focus on eradicating oppression of all people on the basis of who they are (or any basis really) and the use of everyday language in creative and “foreign” ways. 

RAPS + CRAFTS is a series of questions posed to rappers about their craft and process. It is designed to give respect and credit to their engagement with the art of songwriting. The format is inspired, in part, by Rob McLennan’s 12 or 20 interview series.

Photo credit: Delaney Nash

[docholligay]

House in Fata Morgana: The First Door--1603

I have never reviewed a visual novel before, but @iscahwynn made me a very generous offer and a long line of patience, knowing that we are trying something very new. To that end: Please don’t spoil me for the game at all! If you are reading this, I have only gotten through the part written above, and I don’t want to be corrected, even if I’m wrong, even if I’ve missed something, i don’t want to have anything confirmed or denied, and I don’t need any trigger warnings or extraneous explanation. Iscah would like my pure, naive experience of the game. Thank you!

Non-Spoilery: Holy shit, I don’t think I have consumed a visual novel with this kind of fervor. In fact, the only other visual novel I think of where I was like, ‘I have to keep reading what happens” was We Know the Devil, and while I would say that game whups on this one prose-wise (I can’t relate to a lot of what people love about WNTD, but holy shit was the prose some of the most beautiful game stuff I have ever read. I wished the whole time it was a short story or novella instead. Still do!) this one has a lot of plot driving through it and the writing is also very strong--I am used to a certain amount of ‘anime gotta anime’ writing styles, and there is none of that here. 

Spoilers below

I love a story that rewards patience. I could see some people saying that this moves too slowly, but I like to read a Meaty Tome, and so it doesn’t bother me to have to deal with a certain amount of setup, especially because I know this is a collection of short stories, sure, but it’s a collection of short stories taht are all driving at an ending. It might not even be fair to call them short stories so much as…episodes, maybe? I don’t know, they are connected but years apart. I guess i’m actually spitballing too much for having actually not played beyond chapter one. 

So i am 98.6% sure we are in England (please don’t tell me!) Given the references to the Thirty Years’ War, the Golden Age, and winter being a rainy season, all packed into one. Also Rhodes is a British name. I might be wrong but I would be surprised if I were. 

How do I organize this “progress reviewlet” or whatever I want to call it? Let’s just go with the flow.

Again, I love that this is unvoiced. It makes the game read so much more like a book to me, which makes me consume it voraciously, and also doesn’t take me out of the moment. Intensely aware that I am in the minority here, but when I’m reading something that I think probably takes place in late Elizabethan England, and I’m hearing Japanese, it takes me out of the immersion and it’s more like watching an anime, which is fine but doesn’t light up the same center of my brain, generally. Actually, the same would be true if it were English. I can’t mainline the story and let it play out in my mind the way it does when I read it. I read this like I do a visual novel, I barely pay attention to the art except in the “where is everyone standing” way, and that’s not even very helpful for this. So in reading it like a book, I feel like I saw Mell slap Nellie, I feel like I saw the light cross the White Haired Girl’s face as she failed to strangle Mell. It just makes the whole thing more immersive for me. 

Speaking of Nellie, what a wild ride that was. I mean, we knew something was going to be up with Nellie’s level of spoiled when we heard that they removed the thorns from the roses in the garden so she would never be pricked. In that moment, we learn something about the fact that Nellie doesn’t understand what consequences are, she never learns that the things we may want can hurt us. And so she keeps going for the exact things she wants, and she has no sense of danger or of the need for pragmatism, or anything beyond the desires and whims of a spoiled child. 

It truly says something about the quality of the writing that pretty much my most hated squick came up and all I could do was go, ‘Oh girl what happens next” and just kept clicking. I mean, the game very much tips its hand to it, it is not trying to shock you because that’s not the sort of game it is. It wants you to understand that this is who Nellie is and of course this is how she’s going to act. 

But for as monstrous as she is, you feel for her, or I do, when she says, not wrongly, that she was only ever, a “a doll for the family to play with” 

The idea of paintings being alive, of being changed as they are painted, that really stuck with me, and I know the painting was the small mystery within the bigger ones contained within the game, I can’t quite get anywhere with it, but I do agree that paintings have a quality of life to them. This is why it could be some future girl, it could be Nellie, it could be another person in another time. 

So witches. Let’s talk about this. I know that we have a lot of cross talk about the white haired girl, and if the white haired girl is the witch she takes herself to be or if she’s a hidden princess. And then we have the maid. These two are the unnamed characters within the story thus far, and I know they must be unnamed for a reason, but I didn’t really take the witch thing on its face until the rose turned in her hand. 

Oh, Doc, so you think there’s a real witch, and you think it’s the white haired girl? One, yes, I suppose I do and two, no, i suppose I don’t. Remember, the Maid is with her, and I’m also remembering the that the title of this game is The House at Fata Morgana, and I also know, being the one thing I know from the start being about fatas morgana, that they supposedly come from Morgan Le Fay, A WITCH. 

So, I’m wondering if the maid isn’t the witch, and if she isn’t creating all of this as an illusion, and IF she is creating all of this as an illusion, how much of it is the facts of that matter? Or the truth? Those are different things, but related. Is it all created of whole cloth? 

I mean, i feel like the game of the story has to clearly be about the White Haired girl and the Maid, I can look at a title card--OH SHIT AM I THE WHITE HAIRED GIRL?? (Please don’t tell me but do put a pin in it) that would make sense, we’re both the two unnamed characters, we’re on the title card. Hm. 

Is it better to know something, or to be happy? I mean, this is basically the core question and thesis of this segment, and it seems to lean heavily toward no. Everyone was happier not knowing, except, i do want to point out, Nellie. I’m not arguing she’d be happy knowing, she’s not, but I do want to say she would be UNHAPPY in either circumstance. 

I don’t agree with the maid that his error was his kindness. His kindness was not his fuckup. It was his desire, and his drive, that came outside of any thought of the family (especially rich considering how he lectures Nellie) to HAVE this girl who captured him in her own flame. She didn’t even mean to, like the candle means no harm to the moth. But kindness, no, kindness was not the issue. 

But I do love when she says that we have to follow the paths we’ve begun to trod down. He can’t change any of it, and so he has to go forward. 

In all, I liked this section, I have no idea how it will stack up against the others but I can see it laying building blocks for the future of the story. 

While being cautious of spoilers, please, if you have any questions, i’ll try to answer!

[whet-ones-appetite]

THE SSUM REVIEW

I’ve been playing The Ssum for 16 days now and all I can say is it is a really fun journey so far. Like all other players, I’ve experienced difficulties downloading the game but I never gave up! Mystic Messenger didn’t give birth to such a weakling. So I tried various ways to download the game and it worked.

After talking to Teo for a few days, it was fun and as others refer to as ‘slow’. But for me it was the right pace because I can follow our conversation easily. Others might find him boring, but as an introvert, I really find him funny and cute. I really like to tease him because his reactions are cute. There isn’t really a big plot twist to where our conversation start which is good because we can get to know each other better in ‘normal way’. After a week, I noticed a slight shift in our relationship like we have gotten closer than before! Maybe because he starts opening up and starts getting comfortable about sharing sensitive topics to me. And then we got the confession scene on Day 14 which is very sweet and I’m here hoping that I can experience it in real life. He can make the most cringe thing sound cute and sweet like it’s normal. The voice actor did a great job in voicing Teo because you can actually feel the adoration Teo feels for MC. And like MM, the conversations flows naturally. Like you’re talking to an actual person and it doesn’t sound formal like other games.

In terms of paid options, it doesn’t really affect my game so far. Because some options that requires batteries doesn’t give you energies, which I think means the game gives you if Teo liked what you said. In terms of paid photos, it also doesn’t affect my experience because at first I felt disappointed but I know that I can unlock it with batteries. Not all photos that Teo sends you requires batteries so it’s fine.

At first it was kinda hard to earn energies and batteries but I kinda get how things works after a week. Earning batteries was pretty easy as long as you give gifts/supports in the community in different planets. And I am very thankful about the planets because we can interact with the community as long as we have emotions. I feel connected and can write my thoughts with people who have the same thoughts as me without having the feeling of people judging me. Plus the questions we get everyday is fun to answer because I can reflect a lot on myself.

It was fun to play the games especially when you don’t know how to play the game at first because I like exploring when I’m curious how things work lol. Plus the survey you answer and the result you get is fun to do and very accurate!! In short I love everything in this game and I want to share it with you as a broke student who still doesn’t spend any money to play this game. I hope it still a free to play player friendly as I play the game.

Since the game takes place in real-time, it lets you have your own schedule to talk to Teo. Even if others doesn’t like waiting for Teo to come back for 20 minutes, for me it really fits my schedule especially when I have a lot of things to do. Because it enables me to play and do the things I’m supposed to do at the same time. So it doesn’t really affect my schedule while I play this gane because I don’t have to set up alarms to talk to him hahaha.

I also would like to thank Cheritz for their hardwork and writing such as amazing character like Teo. As someone introverted, I feel like his personality really fits my standards and maybe that is why I am so drawn to this game. I hope someday people can enjoy the game without experiencing bugs here and there because I know that you are working hard on it. But I do wish it would not take long so people can experience the fun in playing this game and be able to meet a lot of amazing people in the community. Thank you! 💖 I am very excited to see how the story progresses because the events in the story is happening in real-time also which is why I feel invested.

This is all for now. I wish I could put Teo inside my pocket lol.

[itsevanffs]

Hihi!! I've been hyperfixating on tommary lately and I absolutely loved (In the dark!)! I wanted to see if u have any tommary/harrymort fics that u recommend.. preferably ones that feature a possessive Tom ^^ ty in advance

I guess this would be the right time to publicly declare my bookmarks as open? Everything on there is a hard rec, and I vigorously quality-check those... for my liking and my liking only. (Sorry, not sorry. They're there for me, after all.)

That being said, hmm. I've got a few you might like.

Below the cut: more (additionally to my bookmarks) Tomarrymort (Tomarry or Harrymort) recommendations with possessive/obsessive Tom in alphabetical order; NOT order of how much I enjoy them. I'd argue I enjoy them all equally, just in different ways.

Ps: thank you! I'm incredibly flattered you liked my work :D

and don't let the police know anything by littlecupkate https://archiveofourown.org/works/24920947

Ted Dirlod is dangerous, Harry Potter knows this for a fact, but the man was still his only hope at escaping a doomed fate. It is never wise to blackmail a crime lord. It is even more unwise(?) when said crime lord is obsessed with you. An expanded version of "praying to whatever's in heaven, please send me a felon"

Genuinely lovely? Ticks all my boxes, at least, and minimal angst, which is always a plus. That being said, you should probably read the work mentioned in the summary as well for context. But hey. Two cakes by one person ;) Can never go wrong, can it?

As Certain Dark Things Are to be Loved by Strange_Soulmates https://archiveofourown.org/works/6015619

Tom was Harry's best friend growing up and his first love. At eight, Harry gave Tom his first kiss before moving away. As a freshman in college, the name of the RA on the door across the hall is terribly familiar.

Also absolutely deliciously indulgent. Tom is a possessive terror and Harry loves him for it. Need I say more?

Harry Potter and the Search for Ancient Magic (series) by Snickerdoodlepop https://archiveofourown.org/series/1133141

Once Voldemort realizes that Harry Potter is his horcrux, his plans change drastically. So does Draco Malfoy's assignment for the school year. Harry's sixth year starts going very differently. Snape is on a mission. Harry needs to learn pureblood politics. Draco Malfoy is trying to convince Harry to forgive him. Voldemort finds himself visiting Harry Potter in his dreams. Everyone is realizing that no one is quite what they thought. And through it all, there's a mystery. What is Ancient Magic? Can Harry use it to save himself or will it pull him toward the dark side?

Honestly, genuinely, hands down the best fucking tomarrymort series I've ever read. Hard, hard rec from here. The first work is completed and the second is in progress, so it's a nice pile of words to chew through!

can't commit to anything but a crime by caelesti https://archiveofourown.org/works/27286483

Excitement is the word he does not dare utter, even in the privacy of his own mind. It’s wrong, he knows. These women are people, in their own right; people with fears and aspirations, with friends and families and dreams, and to have anything cut those lives short is nothing but tragic. To have anyone cut those lives short is nothing but condemnable. He doesn’t have James Potter’s laugh lines, but he does have his father’s innate flair for danger. He doesn’t have Lily Potter’s enthusiasm, but he does have her insatiable curiosity. (In every world, Harry will excel at finding the biggest spot of trouble available and sticking his nose in it.)

Hot serial killer serial killer hot. That's it, those are the thoughts. Please read.

Dripping Fingers by May_May_0_0 https://archiveofourown.org/works/25440826

When Harry finds Tom Riddle's diary he does not write 'Hello.' He does not write anything at all. He draws. Tom Riddle falls in love with the artwork. _________________ Sketch by sketch, drawing by drawing, the ink Harry pours into the diary manifests as creations in Tom's monochrome world.

Okay so if I'm the reincarnation of Shakespeare, May_May_0_0 is fucking... Ted Hughes. Which doesn't say much to your average viewer but that man wrote my favourite poem ever (the one I based my war fic off) and I hold him in very high regard. This story? It is poetry in its rawest form. Pure, condensed beauty. If you decide to read only one of the fics in this list, please choose this one.

Either must die at the hand of the other by Metalomagnetic https://archiveofourown.org/works/29356095

Voldemort survives the Battle of Hogwarts because Harry Potter had not been the one to kill him, as the prophecy demands.

When is Metalomagnetic not a master of words? When will I cease becoming breathless at every paragraph, at every cleverly twisted word that comes back and reveals itself so beautifully later?

Fine Line by galaxiesundone https://archiveofourown.org/works/26949952

Magic always leaves traces. The lingering darkness of Sectumsempra, combined with Harry’s nature as a horcrux, awakens the soul piece contained within Ravenclaw’s diadem. At twenty years old, Tom Riddle walks a fine line between man and monster, the devil and the light-bringer in one. His influence forces Harry to face an ancient enemy unlike anything he has faced before: temptation.

Long story short: Tom Riddle is Hot and Good At Being Hot and Harry truly doesn't stand a chance and I am here for it. Lord help me I love this fic to pieces.

Good Intentions by Strange_Soulmates https://archiveofourown.org/works/7035334

Five year old Harry Potter meets and befriends a seventeen year old Tom Riddle while hanging out at his dad’s station. James Potter decides to take Tom under his wing, using Tom’s connection with Harry to try and keep the teen grounded, even as he begins to investigate the Death Eaters, a dangerous organized crime group and their mysterious leader only known as Lord Voldemort.

The sheer potential of this fic. The horrible, terrible dread of future events that have yet to be revealed. I will cry.

Honey, Smoke, Shiver by machiavelli https://archiveofourown.org/works/16068062

Harry - Omega, only son of Lord Potter - is nothing more than a useful playing card in a political game of power and money, one that is bought by the famed Tom Riddle: powerful, dangerous, pureblood Alpha. Unsurprisingly, Harry loves being underestimated.

Machiavelli is always a rec from me. Sorry lads but that's the way it is. Never a moment where I won't recommend their stuff.

Sickly-Sweet Obsession by maquira https://archiveofourown.org/works/18259103

Quiet, studious Tom Riddle spends his first year thirsting after an older student—Gryffindor’s Quidditch Captain, Harry Potter. His crush is common knowledge, and even Harry finds it cute… at first. Possessiveness spawns monstrosities. Tom does all within his power to mess with Harry’s dating life. And one seemingly harmless crush spirals into something darker, begetting deadly consequences.

Again; the potential. Delicious. This will bloom into something beautifully twisted, I'm sure of it.

Stars, Hide Your Fires by Audair https://archiveofourown.org/works/27745546

Riddle’s undivided attention snapped to him with the swiftness of shattering glass. His turbulent magic receded from where it had besieged the shop. "You,” he breathed. Coiling in leisurely motions, the eager tendrils of his magic reached for Harry, swathing about his limbs and neck and chest with a liquid, flowing fascination. "I’ve been looking for you,” Riddle continued, tilting his head to the side and sweeping his gaze over Harry. It was an appraisal that felt simultaneously like the raking of iron nails and the tender drapery of silk. It was so familiar, and yet… so foreign. In the winding streets of Knockturn Alley, an intricate dance of mutual obsession unravels between twenty-three-year-old Tom Riddle and a time-travelling Harry Potter.

This work has recently been undergoing a rewrite, and I can tell you with certainty it's only gotten better for it. It's beautiful; the setting, the atmosphere, the vibes... Perfection. Captures Knockturn Alley's mood impeccably and does not disappoint a single moment.

the pleasure, the privilege by asterisms https://archiveofourown.org/works/21227528

It begins with Vernon Dursley's body, dead across the table. In which Voldemort is dosed with amortentia, and nothing is better for it.

Completed, terrifying... and gorgeous.

The Shrike (to your sharp and glorious thorn) by PaperWorlds https://archiveofourown.org/works/22380079

Shrike: A songbird with a sharply hooked bill, known for their habit of catching insects and small vertebrates and impaling their bodies on thorns, the spikes on barbed-wire fences, or any available sharp point. A young Harry Potter survives an attack by notorious serial killer Voldemort. Over a decade later, they meet again.

Lads I'm so desperate for an update from this fic that I might cry if I think about it for too long. I keep saying it and I'll say it again; this is one of those fics with amazing potential that are sure to never disappoint no matter what path they take. An incredibly hard rec.

To Raise a Servant by bluegrass https://archiveofourown.org/works/19780816

Tom had found the boy amidst pouring rain. He figured he'd always wanted a pet snake.

Surprisingly not quite as dark as the summary makes it seem? I certainly enjoyed it, though, and that's why it's on this list.

What He Grows To Be by Severus_divides_into_H https://archiveofourown.org/works/19042240

Tom Riddle is a frightening coil of darkness, cruelty, and greatness, and changing him is Harry’s only hope for saving people he loves. Going back in time, he takes Tom from the orphanage, but his optimism shatters with every year they spend together. Tom still longs for darkness. Tom stifles him in his possessiveness. Tom is fixated on him to the point of destroying the world just to keep him. But Harry loves him. And the future changes.

Beautiful. And absolutely terrifying. I've started crying mid-scene at least three times for this fic, and it honestly seems unfathomable if you haven't read it if you're on my profile, since I think this is one of the fics that have shaped my style and ambitions. It is what I aspire to be.

[weekend-whip]

Hi, I just would love to say I LOVE your work! It's really well-written and one of my most favorite things to read! I'm a bit curious about how you stayed committed in one project for so long... I've had various multi-chaptered works I posted (and some lying around in the drafts for a long while), but every time i encounter a problem i immediately feel uninspired to post and i immediately tank it. And since I'm doing another multi-chapter fic, I'm scared that I'd abandon it easily. I was wondering how you'd manage to keep on comiting to your own project?

Thank you for the kind words!! 

I have to confess, I’m also extremely guilty of abandoning a project partway through. It’s already happened three times in the recent past for other fandoms (and two of those three times were quite literally smack in the very MIDDLE of the projects as well). One day I’ll go back to them. One day. 

But with this work? It just means too much to me to just up and quit on it (insert ninja never quit quote here). And I’ve gotten stuck plenty of times as well (Chapter 17, Chapter 23, Chapter 28, and Chapter 35 already jump out in particular ghhhhh) but when that happens, I’ve done a variety of things to try and keep the momentum flowing:

Comb back through Notes: Double check to make sure things are still on track in the way you want them to. There’s been countless times I’ve gotten on a writing roll and accidentally write myself into a hole, only to realize it’s because I skipped over something I should have included earlier, or I took too much time on a scene and I have to reign it in to make room for something else. Other times what I had in my original notes doesn’t fit with my vision anymore, and I have to do some reworking there. Or there’s not enough information/context supplied and I have to add in something. Either way, writing out even the barest thing of a plot thread (even if you hate outlines) can help you determine what you should be doing with your story next. 

Read/write other fics/stories. Sometimes my issue is that I’ve stepped away from writing for too long (as I get stupid busy) and it’s not so much that I “forget” how to write, but it can be a little difficult getting back into my “writing voice” and then everything starts to come up bland. By rereading other fics, you can find new inspiration, start to get a mental “language” of how to want to phrase things or describe scenes, a reminder of how to progress with dialogue. etc...basically, for me, it helps me picture my story after days of not really thinking about it, or helps me get a handle of how I want my story to flow. 

Of course, you can always reread your own work, which can remind you of where you wanted to take your plot/characters in the first place and give you a jump start like that... but for me that just makes me annoyed that I can’t read the rest of the fic as *I* have to write it asdfghjk. Alternatively, if you find yourself stuck on one story, start writing/working on another! I know, sounds counterintuitive with the “too many wips” thing, but it doesn’t have to be a full-fledged novel! A oneshot, drabble, a writing request, a practice scene...something small that you’re not necessarily obligated to finish just to get the juices flowing again without the added pressure. That one I can say from experience definitely helps from experience!

Do literally anything else. Sometimes you’re just a bit burnt out and need a break from writing! Give that part of your brain some time to rest, and then when you come back to write, it’ll be with some fresh perspective! Being all-consuming in a project may seem like it’ll help it get done faster, but you can’t drive a car with no gas, y’know? Don’t let yourself get too hung up on writing; it’s supposed to be fun! And when it starts getting not fun, step away before you can too frustrated with it (or yourself). Get a snack, grab some water, draw, do a puzzle, go outside, see some friends, whatever! It’s just as important not to neglect other things you love as well. .... *stares longingly at my gaming backlog*

From my own experience, I do tend to get a reignited itch to write when I’m off doing something else. In my case, let’s say I’m playing a video game, but now that my mind has had time to relax from writing, new ideas and a drive to write actually have the energy to come back full force, so to speak.

Straight up start the chapter/scene/part you’re stuck on from scratch (but don’t throw out what you already have either). Again, sounds counterintuitive, BUT by tackling the problem from another angle (i.e. a different point of view, a different turn in a conversation, simply rearranging the order of events, etc) can do INSANE wonders for finding a way through a block. All those chapters I listed above? All had to be re-written to include everything I wanted that would also flow in a logical way. I look at my older drafts for chapters and wince at my original ideas—but hey, I wouldn’t have the current ideas I have now without them, so can’t let myself feel too bad! 

And by not throwing out what you already have, you’ve got stuff to work with and reference, which is better than trying to go in blind all over again! You can straight up rewrite scenes you weren’t vibing with, rearrange the order of scenes to experiment with the flow, ask yourself why you even needed a scene in the first place...being able to reflect like that is super indispensable, and in the worst case scenario, you’ve still got at least part of a chapter written, so it’s not like you have zero progress at all! 

Take the first/easiest way out, or just eliminate what caused the problem in the first place. It may seem a little dumb, and it’s obviously going to depend on just how big the “problem” actually is or the nature of it, but for the moment, if it’ll help you move forward in the slightest, go for it! Because you can always go back and fix it up later if you want! And if not, you’ve still got a good enough way to get readers (and yourself), from point a to point b. No need to always be perfect; we’re all doing this for fun in the end! And often times a casual reader isn’t going to catch the fact that you may have metaphorically simply put a bandaid over an issue; they’re just here for the fun ride! 

But the biggest secret to keep on carrying on? Love what you do!  Sounds cheesy, but if you’re not fully passionate to begin with, it’s going to be really, really hard to maintain the drive no matter what you do. Always remind yourself of why you started the project in the first place, remember the story you want to achieve in the end, and be a little forgiving to yourself when things aren’t turning out the way you want them to. You just have such high expectations for your work because it means so much to you that you start putting standards on yourself, and that’s not always good for you or your story.

Learn to see problems not as problems but opportunities; a wake-up call for yourself, a check to make sure the story is going in the way you originally wanted it to, or to see if maybe it’s time for a complete direction! It doesn’t mean the project’s not worth finishing; it just means it’s worth so much to you that you’re afraid to see it fail. But what’s more important: achieving a perfect story that made you want to pull your hair out the whole time, or telling an imperfect story you can always go back and fix if you want, but people were able to enjoy regardless because it got done? 

And hey, sometimes you do just have to write a bad chapter/scene/story just to push onward (Chapter 11 of Book 1 is this for me ghhhhh it’s so far from my vision and I never could fine tune it in just the right way I wanted BUT OH WELL). Not saying you should just ~abandon all quality~ when things aren’t going your way, but.......it’s not the end of the world if you do, either. That just means you’ve presented an opportunity for yourself to look back on how you’ve grown! And that’s not a bad thing, right? 

Anyway, that’s just some advice from my own experience/circumstances; hopefully it helped in some small way, at least! ^^

[awhiskeyriver]

Author Interview

I was tagged on main by @hutchhitched @endlessnightlock and @softlikethesunset12...Thank you all so much! ♥️ ♥️

Name: Amelia

Fandoms: The Hunger Games

Where do you post?: AO3 and tumblr

Most popular multi-chapter: The Bet

Favourite story you’ve written so far: Whatever one I’m writing ends up being my favorite for the moment because I get so emotionally invested, haha. I think of the stories that are still posted, my favorite is The Bet. Of all the ones I’ve written, period, I think With Eyes to Hear.

Fic you were nervous to post:  Dysphoria, because I didn’t want to offend anyone and was nervous I hadn’t gotten everything right. The Bet because I knew there was going to be a lot of drama before the HEA and also it was my return to writing after a 3-4 years hiatus.

How do you choose your titles?: I hate thinking up titles and it is usually the last thing I do. They are so difficult. Usually I spitball a few options with friends and see which one fits the best. I also like them better when they’re simple.

Do you outline?: Umm...yes, very much so, haha. I cannot write without an outline because I have to know where the story ends in order to properly pace the flow. I usually write a basic outline first, then add in more details and then finally do a chapter by chapter outline.

Complete: Uhhh, I haven’t counted in a long time haha. Over 20 for sure in my lifetime fic writing, but I don’t know exactly.

In Progress: I have 3 posted WIPS and I have two stories in The Panem Nightlocks universe to write annnnd outlines for three new stories in another sports!romance genre mapped out. So...eight?

Coming soon: The Tutor (Annie x Finnick’s story from The Panem Nightlocks), and a new hockey romance that will begin with Everlark :) not named yet.

Do you accept prompts?: Yes, when I’m looking for a writers block jumpstart or just a palette cleanser here on tumblr. But I usually don’t accept prompts for anything more than a drabble. I have to be inspired to write something so it’s hard for me find too much inspiration from something being given to me.

Upcoming story you are most excited to write: I’m super excited for the new series I’ve been mapping out. @roxys-turing-machine has been listening to all of my ramblings and helping me piece together some really awesome outlines and I think you guys are really going to like it!

Upcoming story/stories you are most excited about: I have so many stories that are on my ‘to read’ list I’ve lost count. I’m sorry to all the stories I haven’t been able to read yet! I promise I’m getting there :)

Thanks again for the tag lovelies!

I don’t know who’s done this already, but I will tag @wendywobbles @southsidestory @winegirl65 @papofglencoe @jhsgf82 @bethpeaches123 @im-doing-hot-girl-shit @sunsetsrmydreams @the-sun-and-the-sea

[ccalbert]

An Introduction

~Hello Lovelies~

Stop me if you’ve heard this before:

You’re a young(ish), starry-eyed writer whose mind is filled to the brim with stories. You treat characters as thought children and spend hours daydreaming their imaginative lives; their hopes and dreams; all the challenges they’ll face. You know once you put pen to paper, your books will fly off the shelves. You may not be the next Stephen King, but you know you can garner a small group of fans at least. Someone, somewhere, is bound to be interested. And you have so many ideas! One of them will surely be a hit, right?!

But which one? And where do you start?

Well, if you’re anything like me… You might never start at all. Sure, you may have a couple hundred notebooks full of ideas and a few bare-boned chapters written, but you haven’t quite found time to finish any works-in-progress yet. 

Or maybe you’ve gotten through half a manuscript already. But something’s… off about it. 

The dialogue’s just not flowing right. That fight scene feels clunky. This isn’t how you pictured the villain at all! She’s the main character; why is she so BORING?! HOW THE HELL AM I GOING TO FIX THIS PLOT HOLE?! WHY ARE THERE MORE OF THEM??!!!

*Ahem*

Needless to say, I get it. Wanting to be a writer and actually writing are two very different things. It doesn’t matter how many ideas your clever little mind can produce. You have to be able to follow through with them if you want any form of success. 

But, I’m getting ahead of myself. This is supposed to be an introduction, after all. 

My name is C.C. Albert. At least, that’s my pen name… Or will be. When- and if- I get published. 

To be completely honest, I don’t know if it’s right to call myself a “writer” when it’s been literal ages since I’ve worked on any of my story ideas. All my WIPs are currently scattered across the net. Rotting in Google Docs without endings. Gathering dust on fanfiction sites. 

But, I still want to publish something. I think I’d make a pretty decent author. Or maybe even an editor. 

So, what’s stopping me? I could think of a few excuses, but it all boils down to one thing: 

I am a hardcore procrastinator. Which doesn’t make for a very good author, let alone a successful one. And I want to change that. 

I want to call myself a writer- an author- without saying that’s what I aspire to be. I want others to read my stories and be inspired or, at the very least, entertained. I want to make a career out of what I consider being one of my better talents. I don’t need to be a bestseller or make millions of dollars; I have no illusions about being famous. 

What I really want is to say that I did it. 

I wrote a fucking book! 

Which brings me to this blog and why I���m writing it. I’ve been toying with the idea (for over two years) of starting a blog for writers like me. Writers who may skirt the edge of being lazy, but who really just need advice on how to tackle that one fight scene or the encouragement to get through that next chapter. Or who maybe just need to see (and laugh at) someone else struggling with the same issues they’ve been dealing with. 

And so, with that in mind, I now present my blog! 

“Writing and the Art of Procrastination.”

Let’s get to work~

P.S. As the title suggests, I wouldn’t expect much in the way of regular posts. The plan is to have something put up every month, but I do not keep very well to a schedule. I will try to be consistent. I make no promises.

[xxdragonwriterxx]

🔥Prowess🔥

~~~

Levi’s heart roared with pride when (Y/N) leaned into his advances, a soft sigh escaping her lips as he kissed down her throat, lightly nibbling on her pulse and licking his way down her warm skin. The two had only been dating for a few months but they had loved each other for years, the two dancing around each other ever since they met until one day, Levi couldn’t take it anymore and just asked her out. He had been befuddled when the normally confident, cool-headed Squad Leader had hesitated at his confession, her eyes drifting to the side as if in fear before she managed to nod her head and smile at him.

Since they had loved each other for so long, despite only coming together relatively recently, Levi was a little surprised at the slow speed with which their relationship progressed physically, (Y/N) always dodging the subject when he brought it up. But he was happy to wait for her, wanting to move at a pace she was comfortable with. After almost six months of patiently waiting, (Y/N) had finally agreed to be intimate with him, her shyness evident but her eyes determined.

(Y/N)’s muffled moan brought him back to the moment, his silver eyes flickering up to where her hand was covering her mouth in an attempt to stifle her sounds. Levi frowned at this and sat back a little, one hand gently skimming across her collarbones to cup her breast while the other reached up to grasp her wrist and pull her hand away from her mouth. Usually, Levi preferred to fuck in peace, having the woman he was with stay quiet to avoid letting anyone around him know what was happening, but with (Y/N), he wanted everyone to know how good he was making her feel. This was their first time together, and (Y/N) was the love of his life, he did not want her to be quiet.

“Don’t cover your beautiful voice, (Y/N), I want to hear you. I want to hear everything from your adorable moans to the sound of you screaming my name,” Levi said breathily, releasing her wrist and moving his other hand to cup her neglected breast.

Suddenly, (Y/N) moved back a little, away from his touch, hesitant. Levi immediately looked up and took his hands off of her, his eyes searching hers for any sign he had done something wrong.

“(Y/N)?”

(Y/N) bit her lip and glanced away from him, her arms coming up to cross over her breasts, her fingers digging into her shoulders until the tips turned white. Something was wrong, Levi could tell. Fear curled in his gut as he thought back to everything he had done so far, trying to pinpoint when he could have accidentally hurt her. When he came up with nothing, he realized she may be feeling self conscious. He couldn’t fathom why, she was downright gorgeous, absolutely stunning in his eyes, with her sparkling (e/c) eyes, beautiful form, and soft, flowing (h/c) hair. She was absolutely perfect, but maybe she couldn’t see herself in the same light.

“Hey, I didn’t hurt you, did I? You don’t have to hide from me, you’re beautiful, but if you don’t want to do this, we don’t have to.”

(Y/N) looked up at him, her heart exploding with love for the man in front of her. He was always so patient with her, so gentle. It was such a jarring contrast to his usually cold demeanor, but it was a welcome one regardless. She loved him so much, and she did want this. It had been such a long time since his confession, she really wanted to take this step with Levi, to show him with her body how much she cared about him. She was just scared. She knew he was different, knew that Levi would treat her right and take care of her like he had promised her when she had accepted his confession all those months ago; she just couldn’t shake off the fear that crept into her bones. He needed to know. He deserved to know.

“No, you’ve been amazing, Levi, you didn’t hurt me, I promise. It’s just…,” (Y/N) hesitated again and rubbed her arms against the chill that settled in the room and flowed over her bare form. Levi gently grasped her chin in his palm and tilted her head up, forcing her to meet his uncharacteristically soft gaze. Taking a deep breath, (Y/N) steeled herself.

“Before you, the last man I was with…, well, he…, was abusive.”

She felt Levi tense, his eyes widening before they narrowed dangerously into sharp metal slits, the anger surrounding him, palpable.

“I know you are nothing like him. You have been so wonderful, Levi, you make me feel so loved and appreciated, but sometimes, I just can’t get him out of my head. I can’t escape him,” (Y/N) said, her eyes glazing over with tears. Levi forced himself to relax and reached out to touch her shoulder, encouraging her to keep talking to him.

“At first, he was charming and sweet, and charismatic,” (Y/N) said. “Compliments were easy for him, and even though I’d had a few lovers before him, none of them were ever very serious. More like friends with benefits than real relationships, so when he started acknowledging me as something more than a sex machine with legs, I was smitten.”

Levi was quiet as he listened, his hand squeezing her shoulder gently to comfort her as tears started to flow down her cheeks.

“It was great for a while. I was a citizen at the time, before I decided the military was my path for the future, and he was the son of a kind noble my father knew since he worked as a groom and blacksmith, taking care of their horses for them. He had money, and as a poor girl working as a groom with my father, I was impressed with his fortune, and lucky enough for him to spend quite a bit of it on me,” (Y/N) sighed. “I know it was stupid, looking back now, I should’ve never gotten myself wrapped up in the glamor of his wealth, but he and his father were so kind, helping my family pay the bills while at the same time allowing me to experience romance pulled straight from a story book, I couldn’t help but be a bit awed.”

Levi moved closer to her, removing his hand from her shoulder to instead sit beside her, his shoulder leaning against hers as he waited for her to finish telling him the story. His heart clenched when he saw more tears spill from her eyes, the salty drops staining her skin.

“But then it wasn’t so great. When we were intimate for the first time, it was fine, normal. It wasn’t anything special, but nothing negative. But the closer I got to him, the more I realized he wasn’t the person I thought he was. His father has been getting older and older and at the time was already starting to have trouble with maintaining energy and memory, so he wasn’t really aware that his son was lying about the way he was using his father’s money. He told me he was using it to help people from the Underground, even taking me down there a few times to help distribute food and supplies.”

“I found out one day about the lies,” (Y/N) continued. “I found out about how he was hoarding his money for himself, using it to tempt people into doing favors for him or luring them into crippling debts. I found out that whenever we went down into the Underground, after we had finished giving out the food, he would send for them to be arrested, claiming they had stolen the supplies from him, and then dangled their freedom in front of their faces like a dog bone, using it to force women to sleep with him while keeping his fat wallet full.”

Levi growled in response to that and (Y/N) let out a dark chuckle, her eyes hardening in fury at the memories.

“I confronted him on it, and that is when it all started to go downhill,” (Y/N) said, her body trembling a little. “He started to beat me to keep me quiet, threatened my family, telling me he’d have my father hung because he “stole” something if I came out with who he really was.”

(Y/N) shuddered again, this time a small sob escaping her lips.

“Then he started to use me, started being too rough and overpowering. He threatened me over and over again if I ever told anyone about anything, including how he was treating me. I was supposed to just put on a pretty face and smile and continue to gush over how amazing he supposedly was, just as I had always done. My own family didn’t even know anything about it, my father even starting to tease me about possible marriage.”

Levi visibly paled at that and he subconsciously tightened his hold on her where his arm was loosely wrapped around her shoulders, the horror that she could’ve been shackled to a man like that forever making his heart pound.

“I eventually did get out of there when the titans broke through the wall, destroying my home and killing my family. I was distraught, but when my family was gone, I realized I had nothing left to lose, and left him for the military, knowing he’d never be able to reach me here,” (Y/N) reached up and wiped at her eyes. “That’s why I’ve been so hesitant about having sex again, about being in a relationship again; why I struggled with your confession in the beginning. I just…, don’t want to fall into that kind of trap ever again.”

Levi quickly pulled her into a firm but loving embrace. He knew he wasn’t good with words, he honestly had no idea how to respond to what she had just told him, not when his thoughts were moving a million miles per minute, but he hoped she could feel what he was trying to tell her through the grip he had on her as he held her close.

She seemed to get the message, her face snuggling deeper into his bare chest, her tears drying on her cheeks as she breathed in his calming scent and listened to his steady heartbeat. Levi lifted a hand to her hair and gently stroked the soft strands, murmuring gentle words to her until she was calmed enough to pull away from him.

“Thank you, Levi,” (Y/N) whispered.

“Come on,” Levi murmured, gently grabbing her wrist and tugging on her, preparing to give her a warm bath and spoil her for a bit. He wanted her to feel comfortable again, and wash away the horrors of her past memories the most he possibly could. “Let me take care of you.”

He looked back when (Y/N) didn’t move from her spot, pulling him back to her. Her eyes were sparkling, but this time he could see the love and lust swirling in her (e/c) hues, rather than the glimmer of unshed tears.

“(Y/N)?”

“I want to do this.”

“Huh?” Levi asked.

“I think it’s so sweet that you are willing to spoil me, especially after you’ve waited for so long, but you’re forgetting that I want this too. I want to show you how much I love you through this, and I want to be shown something other than the rough treatment I was given before. I want you to make love to me, Levi,” (Y/N) said, determination flashing across her face. 

Levi sucked in a breath and searched her face, looking for any sign that she wasn’t telling the truth. He knew (Y/N) was the kind of person who enjoyed helping others, and he was not about to let her hurt herself to please him. But no matter how many times he searched her gaze, he found no sign of doubt. Carefully sliding back into bed and grabbing ahold of her hand, Levi held her gaze when he spoke.

“Are you sure, (Y/N)? We don’t have to do this, I am willing to wait. I want it, fuck, do I want it, but I will wait for you if this is not what you really want.”

(Y/N) beamed at him and lifted her hand, brushing her fingers along his cheek lovingly. How the hell did she manage to get so lucky? He was so fucking perfect, she felt like she was going to explode.

“I know you would, Levi. But I’m tired of waiting. I want you, I promise.”

Levi smiled at her genuinely, making her heart leap in her throat, before the grin turned sultry, his eyes flashing as he allowed himself to indulge in eyeing her still naked form. Reaching out for her, he brought her into his embrace once more.

“I love you,” Levi said, leaning down to kiss her. 

_________________________________

Levi stopped walking the moment he saw (Y/N) freeze, turning around to see his lover staring straight ahead, her whole body tensed. He tilted his head as he watched her, his confusion mounting. He only ever saw her look like that when she was fighting someone, or when she was about to charge off into battle outside the walls. It was a stance that told him she was ready to tear her way out of a situation, no matter what it took. Turning to follow her line of sight, Levi saw Erwin walking towards the two of them, a tall, handsome young man walking alongside him.

Levi's eyes narrowed. He had never seen the man before, but he could already tell he was of noble status. He didn’t look like a traditional noble with his flowing gold hair, tan skin, and well muscled form, his abs showing through the pressed white shirt lined with gold he wore, but Levi could tell in the way he sneered at the state of the military base, his lips curling in disgust when soldiers passed by.

Leaving (Y/N) for a moment, throwing a concerned look in her direction, Levi approached the pair, striding up to the two men confidently.

“Commander Erwin, who is this?” Levi asked, reverting to using Erwin’s title in the presence of the noble.

“Ah, Captain Levi, this is Lord Byron’s son, Lord William. I have been informed that unfortunately, Lord Byron passed away recently, and so I’ve called Lord William down from his estate to discuss the situation regarding funding for the Survey Corps,” Erwin said.

Levi grunted his acknowledgement and turned to move back to his love, his worry increasing tenfold when he found her still frozen in place, her eyes wide and dark with fury. He was just about to ask her what was wrong when everything clicked into place. She had never told him her ex boyfriend’s name, but she hadn’t felt the need to. She had assumed that Levi would never meet the bastard, and if he ever did meet him, it was assumed that (Y/N) would be nowhere near him.

Levi felt a dark flare of anger coil in his gut, and wanted nothing more than to beat the noble into the ground, but he knew he had to get (Y/N) out of here as soon as possible. She had finally been getting more comfortable with being in a relationship again, she did not need this to set her back. Levi was almost to her, his hand reaching out to grasp her wrist when Lord William’s loud voice made everyone stop dead.

“(Y/N)? Is that you? Well, hello my dear! Long time no see, huh?”

Levi turned to throw Lord William a nasty glare but the short Captain was almost completely ignored as the young lord strode up to the frozen Squad Leader, a charming smile on his face. If it weren’t for what (Y/N) had told him before, and the way she was standing, Levi would’ve thought the smile was genuine. The young man was practically beaming, and his eyes sparkling as if he were greeting an old childhood friend. But as Levi looked closer, he could see that the smile didn’t quite reach William’s eyes.

William had his arms open, ready to encompass the obviously uncomfortable (Y/N) into a large bear hug when Levi stepped in, one arm drifting just slightly behind him, a warning for William’s eyes only, not to come any closer.

“Lord William, I was unaware you and my girlfriend were previously acquainted, and so while I apologize for the interruption in your reunion, may I remind you that we are here to discuss the Survey Corps funding?” Levi asked cooly.

Shock flared in William’s gaze for a moment, his eyes flicking between (Y/N) and Levi before he let a smug grin ride across his face, making Levi’s stomach flip.

“Girlfriend, huh? I apologize if I came off as being too personal, I only meant to greet a close friend of mine, that’s all. If you wish to move right onto the budget then lead the way,” William said, taking a step back and motioning the senior officers forward.

(Y/N) didn’t like turning her back to the young lord, but she refused to give him the satisfaction of seeing her rattled by his sudden reappearance in her life. Standing up tall, (Y/N) looped her arm through Levi’s and strode forward with her head held up high, her jaw clenched as she fought the urge to turn around and tear the man behind her limb from limb. She could tell Erwin noticed her tense posture and aggressive attitude towards William, but the Commander didn’t comment as he brought up the rear of the group, making their way to an empty conference room.

Once they had settled into the room, they were joined only by Mike, Hanji, Nanaba, and Moblit, before the door shut out the rest of the military base. (Y/N) felt jittery, even with the other officers in the room, but forced herself to remain calm as she took a seat beside Levi, relaxing a little when she felt her lover place his hand comfortingly on her thigh.

Unfortunately, Erwin was not the only one who seemed to notice her discomfort as William shot her a knowing smile, and settled in the chair directly across from her, his eyes never leaving her form as he very obviously and purposely eyed her up and down, his gaze lingering on her breasts and hips when he knew Levi was watching.

Erwin coughed awkwardly at the rising tensions in the room and shuffled the papers in front of him, eager to start the meeting without anyone losing a limb. Levi’s gaze never left the young lord as he dragged his attention away from (Y/N)’s body to focus on the Commander.

“Thank you for coming down today, Lord William, as I am sure you are aware, your father was a major source of income for our services. He was very kind in his offerings to us, and was a very significant contributor in allowing us to procure the proper supplies and weaponry for our soldiers. We are not necessarily asking that you provide the same provisions your father did, only that maybe you would consider continuing to fund some of our more important functions such as our food supply and medical care?”

Lord William leaned back in his chair for a moment, running a hand through his thick golden locks. His eyes flickered over to (Y/N), and it took all of her willpower to avoid glaring at him in return, forcing herself to keep her gaze neutral when he looked at her. Levi gave her thigh a light squeeze and she reached under the table to rest her hand over his in gratitude for his silent support.

“Listen, Commander, I would love to consider your offer, as I have no qualms with the Survey Corps itself, and I support what you and your soldiers are doing to help save Humanity,” William said.

“That’s great, Lord William, and we thank you for your-”

“However,” William said, rudely cutting off the Commander. “I have one problem.” 

Erwin raised an eyebrow but did not let his irritation show, his sharp blue gaze shifting to meet William’s green ones.

“Which is?”

“I do not make deals with my enemies.”

Erwin tilted his head in confusion, and the other senior officers began to whisper amongst themselves, their questions making the air thick above them. Only Levi and (Y/N) kept silent, their gazes locked on William’s turned head. (Y/N) clenched her fist under the table, squeezing Levi’s hand, who returned the gesture with equal strength. They knew what this was about. (Y/N) had hoped this meeting would pass without this topic coming up, but she knew she had been fooling herself when she had thought that.

“I thought you just told us that you support our goals and actions as we strive to make this world a safer place,” Mike said, his voice clear and low. “What about that makes us your enemy?”

“Oh, you are mistaken, I said nothing about the Survey Corps being my enemy. But there is one of you within this branch of the military that I have some unfinished business with, and I refuse to make deals so long as that person is a part of your project,” Williams said, still maintaining his eye contact with the Commander.

(Y/N) tensed even further, her eyes darkening with fury. She knew what he was doing and it made her want to be sick. She had known from the moment she saw him that he would make an effort to bring her into the conversation, to chastise her in front of her colleagues and leaders, but she had not expected him to go so far as to insinuate she be removed from the Survey Corps entirely. (Y/N) fought to control her breathing, her jaw clenching to the point she worried about her teeth cracking.

“Well, maybe we can work something out, who is it that you have problems with, Lord William?” Erwin asked.

It was then that William finally turned in his seat to look right at them, his gaze switching between (Y/N) and Levi as a wicked grin crept along his face, his green eyes flashing with malicious intent. “I have a problem with Captain Levi, I believe he has something of mine.”

(Y/N)’s eyes grew wide then. All along she thought William was just going to try his hardest to drag her down. She hated it, but she had expected it, and would be able to get through it just so long as she had her friends and lover at her side. What she had not expected was for William to drag Levi’s name into the conflict, ready to tear him down as well.

A quick glance in Erwin’s direction revealed his thoughts on the matter, his face twisted in shock while his icy blue eyes flickered with cautious irritation.

“Hmm, Captain Levi, I was unaware you even knew Lord William, do you have something of his?”

Levi glanced at Erwin and noted his expression as well before leaning back in his chair, feigning relaxed confidence.

“Of course not, Erwin, I have never even seen this man before.”

“Really?” William growled, his charming persona beginning to fall away piece by piece. “Because that woman beside you looks an awful lot like my lost bride, Captain.”

A few gasps filled the room at his words, (Y/N)’s fellow officers immediately looking in her direction with shocked expressions. (Y/N) and Levi glanced at each other before they both settled their hate-filled gazes on William.

“I have no idea what you are talking about, Lord William,” (Y/N) said in a flat tone. “I was never meant to marry you.”

William growled at her. “You can lie to yourself, and him, all you’d like, (Y/N),” William said, gesturing to Levi as he spoke. “But deep down you know the truth. You were destined to marry me. Just because you ditched me, ran away and gained favor in the military by spreading your legs for your superiors, doesn’t mean you’re free. I intend to take back what is mine.”

“I am not an object to be owned,” (Y/N) snapped, her eyes flashing with barely suppressed fury as she stared down her ex, ignoring the embarrassment that flooded her veins at his crass comment. She just had to focus, she knew he was going to try to put her to shame in front of her friends and superiors, she just had to get through it and everything would be okay. She needed to do this, needed to face him down so that maybe she could finally escape his tormenting shadow, which seemed to constantly loom over her whenever she tried to take another step towards Levi.

“What? So this new man doesn’t exist?” William snarled, waving at Levi.

“I am her lover, not her owner,” Levi said, his voice dark and low. Around the table, all of the superior officers began to raise their guard, Hanji sliding closer to (Y/N) while the rest of her friends tensed in their seats.

“What a catch,” William drawled with a snort, sarcasm dripping from his tongue as he looked the Captain up and down. “And I suppose she is so satisfied with you? I didn’t know (Y/N) was attracted to pale dwarves.”

The entire room jerked in their seats, (Y/N) even letting loose a dark growl that sounded almost feral in nature. Levi felt embarrassment wash over him at the insult, but he didn’t let it get to him, instead, focusing on the warmth that blossomed in his heart at the sound of (Y/N)’s threatening snarl in his defense.

“And last time I checked, (Y/N) wasn’t attracted to violent men with a lot of baggage. Do you really think you are enough for her? Do you really think you can provide for her and be there for her when she needs you the most? If that’s what you tell yourself in the mirror every morning, that you can be what she needs in her life, then you’ve got to stop lying to yourself. There is more to a relationship than sex and making her breakfast in the morning.”

Levi forced his face to remain expressionless except for his dark scowl, refusing to let the lord see how he was getting to him. He wanted to ignore the young man, wanted to stand up tall and tell him that everything he was saying was complete and utter bullshit. But Levi could feel it in his heart. He had no idea how, but William seemed to know exactly what Levi struggled with everyday, the question he asked himself when he looked at his stunning girlfriend: was he good enough?

“Or do you even do that?” William continued, ignoring Erwin’s warning call of his name. “Do you even make her breakfast in the morning? Claim her as your own? Or do you just make her tea occasionally while she sits on the couch, bored? How many books has she finished in the past few weeks? She always reads when she has nothing better to do, that should tell you exactly how satisfied she is.”

Levi wanted to rebuke what he was saying but his mind thought back to the past few weeks without his permission, automatically thinking back to the number of finished books (Y/N) had placed in a pile on the coffee table in his office. He internally winced as he thought about how tall that pile was getting.

“William that is enough!” Erwin snapped, foregoing all pretense of politeness, his eyes burning with an icy fire as he stared down the young lord, who merely scoffed at the Commander, a smug smirk gracing his lips.

“Oh I am far from finished, Commander,” William said in a mocking tone. “I haven’t even gotten to the best part, and I haven’t done anything worthy enough for you to force me to leave. I am not under your command, I am under my own.”

“You have spent this entire time making unprecedented, inappropriate comments towards two of our commanding officers,” Hanji snapped back, her glasses flashing as she turned to glare at the lord.

“And you would have me forcibly ejected from the meeting because I hurt your feelings? I thought the Survey Corps was under better management than that, I may have to talk to the royal council about having some of you reassigned,” William threatened, making everyone shut their mouths, despite the angry glares being leveled at him. (Y/N) was holding onto her pen so tightly, the writing utensil looked as if it were about to snap.

“And if she is so bored with you in every other aspect of your relationship,” William said, turning his gaze back onto the Captain. “What do you think that means for your sex life, hmm? Do you really think she’d be satisfied with that if she isn’t with anything else? I mean, what did you really expect? With that pitiful height, there must not be much to please her with down there either, right? You really think she could possibly be happy with you after she’s already had me? She used to scream my name loud enough for my entire estate to hear, does she do that for you too, Captain?”

Levi had no qualms with his size, he knew he was talented under the sheets, but the lord’s words still stung him. He couldn’t help the light blush that stained his cheeks when William talked so nonchalantly about his size and (Y/N)’s previous reactions in bed, embarrassment flooding his system for the second time that night. Despite his efforts to suppress them, the doubts started to worm their way into his heart, asking himself over and over again the questions that always plagued him but he’d always managed to shove down before. Now they rose up, stronger than ever, poisoning his heart and chaffing away at his confidence.

Everyone in the room flinched when (Y/N) suddenly slammed her hands down on the table in front of her, standing up so fast her chair flew out behind her, her eyes burning with a dark, fiery hatred as she met William’s stare. At one point in her life, she would’ve cowered in fear from the green gaze that stared right back at her. She would’ve bowed her head and looked to the floor as he bashed at her self-confidence until she was stripped bare, left with nothing but her doubts. She was used to his horrible personality, she was used to the way he would degrade others, and lie to make himself look and feel better. But not this time. Not when he was insulting the best thing that had ever come into her life. She loved Levi more than anything, and as William’s scathing words slapped her lover across the face, (Y/N) forgot all of her fear, left with nothing but a furious desire to rip this man to shreds.

“Don’t you dare talk about me or my lover like that. Levi is the best thing to ever happen to me and he proves that to me every damn day. He is leaps and bounds better than you ever were and he is more of a man than you will ever be. He is out there, fighting by my side, protecting me, and reminding me that I am loved, while you cower away in your cave of wealth, brooding over the few things you can’t have in this life because you chased them away with your abuse. If you ever try to degrade him in front of me again, I will fucking kill you,” (Y/N) was panting when she was finished, her anger so intense she was shaking, her knuckles turned white from where she was gripping the desk.

Levi’s look of shock and adoration as he looked up at his lover was mirrored by the faces of all of the officers in the room, some of which morphed into smug smiles after a moment when they caught sight of the surprise on William’s face. William glanced around before he sat up a bit, rearranging his face into one of a bland lack of interest. Switching his gaze from (Y/N)’s tense form back to Levi, William let his own smug smile form and angled his head at the Captain.

“Wow, strong words coming from such a little slut. Tell me, Captain Levi, when you fuck her, have you ever noticed that little noise she makes right before she climaxes?”

(Y/N) closed her eyes. She knew what this was, what he was trying to do. It was another one of his tactics. He was trying to shred her dignity, destroy her credibility in front of her friends. She figured he had to know she was a Squad Leader, one of the senior officers of the Survey Corps, otherwise she wouldn’t even be in this meeting. He knew he was losing this battle he had started due to the support she had from her lover and her friends, so he was trying to cut her down another way, embarrass her in the worst way possible before he took his leave. Taking a deep breath, (Y/N) shoved down the heat that rose in her chest and stained her cheeks, gathering all of the confidence she had left as she opened her eyes and stared right at William without backing down. (Y/N) knew Levi was about to say something, but she beat him to it. She needed to do this, needed to defend the both of them.

“With Levi, it’s not little,” (Y/N) said, causing Hanji to squawk with surprise and laughter. “Now get the fuck out. We don’t want money from you.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” William asked, his expression revealing his shock at her determined response. “You need me!”

“No, (Y/N)’s right,” Erwin cut in. “We don’t require your services anymore, now leave. If you refuse, we will have every right to arrest you for trespassing and possible conspiring against the military and government.”

William’s mouth sat agape as he looked at each officer in the room, searching for the support he would never find. “This is an outrage!” He yelled.

“What? Upset that you couldn’t manipulate us into cooperating? Angry that you couldn’t hang your wealth over us like a bone for a dog?” Levi taunted, confidence seeping back into his voice as he thought back over what his lover had said to defend him.

“I- I…,”

“Get. Out,” (Y/N) said with gritted teeth, her eyes piercing him like daggers.

William fumbled for a minute before he stood clumsily from his chair and backed into the closed door. When he saw that once again, nobody was going to come for his aid, William threw all of them a dark look and flung open the door, fleeing from the scene, screaming about how they were all going to regret this someday.

(Y/N) finally completely relaxed when the sound of his voice could no longer be heard echoing down the hall, a soft sigh slipping from her lips as she collapsed back into her chair.

“(Y/N), I am so sorry, I had no idea, if I had, I never would have-”

“It’s quite alright, Erwin,” (Y/N) said with a smile. “I’m upset that all of you had to experience that, but in a way, I’m happy I finally got to stand up to him the way I wanted to. The last time I saw him, I didn’t have the strength, which was why he came back in the first place. He thought he’d find what he saw all those years ago, a scared, trembling little girl who was stuck under his thumb.”

Erwin nodded but it was obvious that he still felt guilty, his brows furrowed as he looked between Levi and (Y/N), his eyes filled with remorse. Levi nodded at his Commander, his own version of accepting Erwin’s apology and stood from his chair without a word, reaching down to offer (Y/N) his hand. (Y/N) took it without hesitation and followed Levi out of the conference room while the other leaders packed everything up.

Neither of them spoke as they walked through the halls together, both of them lost in their own thoughts as they made their way to Levi’s rooms. Once they reached the familiar wooden door, Levi held it open for her to enter before closing it behind them and leaning against it. He wouldn’t meet (Y/N)’s gaze once the door was shut, crossing his arms as he suddenly found the window above his desk to be very fascinating.

“Levi?” (Y/N) called to him.

“Hm?”

“I’m sorry I said some of the more…, private things back there. I hope I didn’t embarrass you too much, it was just all I could think of to get back at him. To show him that I wasn’t fazed by his insults.”

Levi met her gaze for half a second before looking away again. “You have nothing to apologize for, I’m proud of you, how you stood up to him back there.”

“Then what’s wrong?” (Y/N) asked, moving up to him to cup his cheek in her warm palm, making him meet her soft gaze.

Levi cursed himself for feeling this way, for letting William’s comments get the better of him, but he felt like he had to ask anyway. His silver eyes darted over to the pile of books on his coffee table before closing them, taking a deep breath.

“(Y/N), I know I shouldn’t be thinking this way, but I have to ask…, am I, enough for you?”

“Oh my gods, Levi!” (Y/N) gasped. “Of course you’re enough! More than enough! I meant what I said back there, when I said you were the best thing in my life, that was not for show. I meant every word, don’t you dare let his insults get the better of you, none of them are true.”

“I know I shouldn’t and I know you would never lie to me but…, I can’t help but wonder if you would be happier with someone who could dedicate more time for you. Someone who could shower you with the pretty words I’m shit at expressing. You deserve those things, (Y/N), and I worry that I can’t be there for you when you need me.”

“I love no one other than you, Levi Ackerman, social awkwardness and all,” (Y/N) said with a giggle when he threw her a half-hearted glare. “Listen to me, Levi. I don’t need all of those things. I can feel how much you love me in the little things you do for me. Everyday, you make me feel so loved and important, you don’t need fancy words to tell me the things I already know. You have your own love language and that is more than enough for me.”

“You’re never bored with me?” Levi asked, glancing at the books again.

(Y/N) followed his line of sight and rolled her eyes, leaning forward to rest her forehead against his.

“No, silly. I love you and I could never be tired of you. I have all of those books on the table because I love to read, it’s one of my favorite past times. All of that stuff he said about me only doing it when I have nothing better to do is complete bullshit. I will say it again, I love you for you and you alone. Never doubt that, okay? Besides, every day is an adventure with you, don’t you dare try to add more shit to our lives, I might just explode,” (Y/N) said with a light laugh.

Levi nodded and chuckled a little, his eyes closing as he leaned against her.

“Thank you, (Y/N). I love you, I’m glad you know that.”

“I love you too,” (Y/N) said.

They were content to stay there for a moment, relishing in the feeling of being close to one another when (Y/N) suddenly leaned forward to nip at his earlobe, causing Levi to jerk.

“You know, I meant what I said at the end too,” (Y/N) smiled wickedly against his skin. “That noise isn’t little when I’m with you.”

Levi couldn’t keep the grin off his face as he felt her leave light kisses along his throat, the quietest moan slipping past his lips. “Is that so?”

“Uhm hm,” (Y/N) hummed. “Why don’t you help me prove it?”

“With pleasure,” Levi said, quickly scooping her up in his arms, beaming at the squeal of surprise and delight she released into the air. (Y/N) smiled against him as she looped her legs around his waist, her arms locking behind his neck to toy with the fresh hair of his undercut.

When they reached the bedroom, Levi shut the door behind him with his foot and set (Y/N) on the bed, watching with glittering eyes as she bounced on the mattress. Her wicked grin matched his as he crawled over her, his hands roaming, as he leaned down to give her ear lobe the same treatment she gave him. His warm breath made her shudder as he leaned in close, gently brushing the shell of her ear with his teeth before he spoke.

“I’m not going to lie, I can’t keep quiet when I’m with you either.”

(Y/N) moaned at his words and writhed beneath him when he started to attack her neck, her heart pounding with excitement and intense love for the man above her. She knew it would still take her some time to navigate through this new relationship with her Captain, knew that there would be nights where she struggled with the actions of her previous lover; but she also knew that she couldn’t have asked for a better person to share her life with as she looked into Levi’s eyes, the love she felt for him reflected right back at her.

[t0wnspersonb]

Bad Days and Meat Buns (Bokuto Kotaro x Reader)

I love Bokuto so fucking much ya’ll. Akaashi is my husband though if anyone was wondering. I hope you enjoy this one, I had so much fun writing it:) I would love some feedback on what you think of this one, while I do enjoy writing smut, I also am a sucker for some good quality fluff my guy. If you have any requests please let me know! I’ll gladly write something up:)

Word Count: 1,770

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today was a terrible day.

 It was like the world was out to get you, every single bad thing that could happen to someone had happened to you, and quite frankly, you were sick of it. 

 To start off, you had woken up incredibly late, barely making the first bell after rushing out the door of your home. Then when it was time for you to take that exam you were studying hard for, you had filled in the bubbles completely wrong and didn’t have time to fix it. 

 That was how your morning started off. 

 But it was like the universe thought it wasn’t enough, and your day progressively got worse.

 Since you were rushing to make it to school on time you didn’t pack a lunch. So when lunch time had rolled around you thought that you would just buy today instead.

 Nope.

 The universe didn’t want you to eat it seemed; you left your wallet at home.

 Throughout the day all of your teachers had it out for you too, constantly calling on you for answers or calling you out for not paying attention.

 Yup. 

 You were definitely sick and tired of it all.

 School had finally ended, much to your relief. But you had to stick around longer than you had wanted.

 Bokuto had texted you, asking if you wanted to wait for him after volleyball practice and go hang out at his house afterwards.

 As much as you wanted to go home and wash away the day with a nice bath and dinner and go right to bed, you also wanted to see your boyfriend. Bokuto always had a way of cheering you up.

 Usually you would go inside and watch the team practice, but you didn’t want the entire team seeing how down you were today. 

 So you had texted Bokuto that you had some last minute stuff to do for the teacher, and said you would meet him at the gate to walk home together. 

 You had wandered around the school grounds, brooding over how bad your day was. By the time you realized you had to meet up with Bokuto it was several minutes late; cursing to yourself you hurriedly walked towards the school entrance.

 As you approached the gates you noticed Akaashi hanging around, texting something on his phone, Bokuto nowhere to be found. 

 “Akaashi where’s Boku -'' before you could get your sentence out a body ran into yours, knocking the wind out of you and causing you to stagger. Luckily, you didn’t fall on your ass. 

 But…

 Your school uniform was covered in juice now. You looked over to see a first year boy apologizing profusely, bowing at you repeatedly.

 “I-It’s okay, just watch where you’re going next time.” you said quietly, taking out a handkerchief and attempting to dab away the juice. The boy apologized loudly again before he and his friends took off.

 This… this definitely wasn’t a good day.

 You could feel your lower lip quivering, tears stinging your eyes. 

 Damn it.

 You didn’t want to cry over something so trivial as spilled juice. But man was this the cherry on top to the day that you were having. 

 The frustrations you were feeling today had finally bubbled up to the surface, forming into the only thing that you knew how to do when you felt like this; cry.

 “Y/n-san, are you okay?” Akaashi’s gentle voice asked, his hand gently cupping your elbow.

 Your eyes you had trained on the ground snapped up to look at Akaashi’s worried face.

 You whimpered softly, fat tears cascading down your cheeks now, your lower lip quivering. “No.” you sobbed out.

 Akaashi was taken back, he wasn’t expecting you to start crying, no sobbing over getting your uniformed soiled.

 You had stopped your movements of trying to get the juice out of your clothes and settled for crying at this point, rubbing at your eyes to stop the flow of tears, hiccuping softly to yourself.

 Akaashi didn’t know what to do. He felt hopeless as he stared at your trembling figure, “do you want me to find Bokuto for you?” he asked gently, squeezing your arm carefully.

 You nodded through your tears. 

 Akaashi got out his phone, getting ready to call Bokuto to tell him to hurry up and get to the gate but he didn’t have to.

 “AKAASHI, why is Y/n crying!?” a loud familiar asked angrily, the third year stalked towards him, his eyes showing annoyance towards the setter.

 Akaashi sighed softly to himself; “I didn’t make her cry, Bokuto. A first year almost ran her down and spilled his drink on her. But I think her crying is more than just that.” 

 Before Bokuto could say anything else you were tugging at the edge of his blazer like a small child; your sobbing had gotten louder now. “Ko-Kotaro.” you whimpered out, gazing up at your boyfriend through blurry eyes. “I want to go home.”

 His expression turned from anger, to bewilderment, and then to a gentle loving expression. He rubbed your head tenderly, “I know. We need to get you out of those clothes first before you get sick. Come on.” he tugged at the hand that was attached to his blazer, lacing his large fingers together with your small ones as he tugged you towards the boy’s volleyball changing room. 

 Akaashi shook his head; I guess our captain is more reliable than we think, he thought as he walked off.

 “Here.” Bokuto said after rummaging through his cuby. “Don’t worry it’s clean and it’s better than wearing a wet shirt.”

 He handed you one of his volleyball shirts he had gotten at the past Spring Tournaments. The shirt was going to be massive on you, but he was right. It was better than wearing your sticky one.

 By the time you had gotten to the room your tears had finally stopped, a wet sniffle or hiccup escaping your lips every now then.

 “Kotaro, can you turn around?” you asked shyly, realizing that he was still staring at you as you began unbuttoning the first two buttons of your uniform.

 He tilted his head to the side, a dumbfounded expression on his face. “Eh? But I’ve seen you naked plenty of times before, bug.”

 You flushed at the nickname he always called you and by his statement. “K-Kotaro! You can’t say stuff like that.”

 He laughed loudly at your embarrassed expression before turning his back towards you. “But it’s the truth!”

 “I don’t care Ko! You don’t need to talk about that here.” you scolded, your voice sounded a little hoarse, which wasn’t surprising from all the crying you did.

 “Why? There’s no one else here.” he shrugged causing you to frown at him and shake your head, even though you knew he couldn’t see you.

 Tugging at the edge of his blazer again he turned his head over his shoulder to look at you.

 You were significantly smaller than him and his shirt dwarfed your figure completely.

 You looked absolutely adorable.

 Bokuto’s face turned red as he stared at you; a wide grinning making its way onto his face. “You look great in my clothes babe!”

 “Lower your voice Ko,” you scolded gently. “I’ve worn your clothes before anyway.” you grumbled, face heating up again, you always wore his shirts after certain activities in the privacy of his room.

 He laughed loudly again; “Come on bug! Let’s go get some meat buns. Hey! Hey! Hey!” he cheered, throwing his arms up above his head.

 A smile made its way onto your lips as you stared at the loud man you called your boyfriend.

 The heaviness in your chest was long gone now, and you had actually begun to forget how bad today was. Now that you were with Bokuto, everything seemed a lot better.

 You had gobbled up three meat buns on your way back to Bokuto’s house, causing more boisterous laughter from the said boy; claiming that he loved “a girl that can eat.”

 His parents were both expecting a late night at work, so you two had the house to yourselves for the time being.

 Bokuto had given you first dibs on the shower, which you were thankful for. You wanted to wash the remaining remnants of today’s day from your skin. 

 After you had finished showering you dressed yourself in yet another t-shirt of Bokuto’s and a pair of boxers for added comfort. 

 As you sat on his bed waiting for him to finish his shower, you decided to text Akaashi, apologizing for your mental breakdown in front of him. 

 Frowning slightly, you sighed and flopped onto Bokuto’s bed, staring up at the ceiling. You hated the fact that you let everything get to you, to the point of crying. 

 How embarrassing.

 Lost in thought, you hadn’t noticed that Bokuto had finished his shower and was standing at the doorway, watching you as he dried his hair.

 “What happened today?” he asked, sitting on the edge of his bed near your feet. You turned your gaze to him, blush coating your cheeks as you took in his floppy hair. 

 You always thought that Bokuto was incredibly handsome, but when his hair wasn’t spiked up; well it was definitely your favorite image of him.

 You frowned slightly before launching into your story of how bad today was for you. 

 “ - I didn’t mean to start crying. I probably frightened poor Akaashi-kun.” you concluded, you were now rolled onto your side, your left arm propping up your head. Bokuto settled down his back against his headboard as he listened to you.

 “You didn’t just cry, you had a full mental breakdown with snot and everything.” Bokuto claimed, thinking back to your loud crying. 

 You pouted and jabbed him lightly in the ribs causing him to pout, rubbing his side. “That hurt!”

 “Don’t be mean Kotaro.” 

 He laughed loudly, reaching to pull you up on his lap, you settled against him comfortably, sighing in content. 

 Bokuto was always so warm and solid against you. His strong arms wrapping around your waist as you leaned against his incredibly broad shoulders.

 “If you’re ever having a bad day again, you know that you can always count of me to cheer you up right?” he said after a moment of comfortable silence.

 “Of course Ko. You always know how to make me feel better. You’re the best.” you sighed pleasantly, nuzzling your face against his shirt, you were tired now. 

 “Hey, hey, hey! Of course I’m the best! I’m the ace afterall!” he boosted confidently.

 “Kotaro.”

 “Sorry babe.”

[wordsnstuff]

Guide To Plot Development

Patreon || Ko-Fi || Masterlist || Work In Progress || Studyblr || Studygram

Where To Start

Start with the zero draft. Honestly, the only thing you need to know about your story in order to complete a solid zero draft is the basic timeline of events and 2-3 main characters. Zero drafts don’t need to include any minor characters, backstory, world building, subplots, anything. They’re just a rough estimate of what your story is going to be and where it’s going to go. 

This way, you have something to work with when you do approach the task of maturing your story, which is a lot easier to do when you have already gotten the garbage ideas onto paper, seen them, realized they’re bad, clipped out the good parts, and developed a better understanding of your story’s trajectory. 

Placing The Climax

The climax is two things; the apex of built tension and the turning point of the conflict. Recognizing that as a definition makes pin-pointing the climax of your story much easier, especially if you’re the kind of person who likes to start with a solid premise and work forward from there, rather than build a sturdy skeleton and fill in the blanks as you write the first draft. If you’re still having trouble, the climax is usually one of, if not the most exciting parts of the plot, and that comes from anticipating a massive shift in the story. 

Outlining For Discovery Writers

I know a lot of people out there will read this article and question whether they can put it to use because they’re not an intense plotter who relies on outlines, character sheets, etc. A lot of writers prefer to let characters grow on their own and the conflict present itself naturally, which is less predictable but very exciting, especially when brand new ideas hit you out of nowhere. If you’re one of these people, fear not. An easy way to settle the slight nervousness that comes with diving straight into a blank page is to write down all of the basic or specific ideas you have in one spot where you can see it all and as you go along, refer to it for inspiration or answers when you hit a snag in your story’s flow. It’s not exactly an outline, but it’s a lead, and it’s worth doing. 

Balancing Planning With Pantsing

A lot of writers who decide to take their stories seriously and commit to finishing a large project make the mistake of thinking that means they have to plan like a professional (which, spoiler, most professionals don’t do). What happens in these cases is that writers plan so meticulously for so long that the story becomes... boring. We all get kind of tired of stories when they take up too much of our imagination, but getting tired of a story before even a word of it is written should be avoided. 

I have a personal rule that I never give myself more than 6 weeks to plan a story. That seems like a lot to most people, but I also zero draft all of my stories before I plan them, so I never start a first draft with a blank page. I suggest that if you frequently run into this issue, you try this method and between each serious draft, you give yourself at least a month of space from it in order to refresh your mind. 

What Comes After Drafting

Foreshadowing, symbolism, subplot integration, and micro-development. These are all examples of things that writers try to plan before their first crack at a draft and end up betraying their ability follow through with writing the story at all. When it comes to complicating the story, these elements all come into the picture much later, when the main plot, character profiles, and structure is solid and ready to be finalized in the interest of moving forward in the writing process. When you’re plotting, shove these things out of your mind. You can’t input symbolism into a story that doesn’t exist, and you can’t develop characters that haven’t been born. 

Common Struggles

– The common struggles section of my “guide to__” posts are general questions sent in by readers on the topic at hand. If you have a question that has not been addressed thus far, you’ll probably find the answer in this section. As always, you’re welcome to send other questions to my inbox if you don’t find the answer in this post. –

~ How do I correctly pace a story?... The pace should depend on the genre and point of view, as these things are the framework of every plot. Generally, anticipation should be a slow burn and the big moments should be snappy and explosive, rather than drawn out. The exposition, climax, and resolution should take up the least amount of time in your story, and the rising action should be the majority of the rest of it.

~ What needs to be in your beginning, middle and end?... The answer to this question is answered when you choose a definitive structure model to either follow or build off of. I have a whole post about it here: Plot Structures

~ How can I know if I’ve resolved my major conflict enough?... The resolution of your story should leave the reader feeling satisfied with the protagonist’s overcoming their obstacle, but still leave enough room to anticipate more to come. 

~ How should the plot close?... This is entirely up to you, but I would take into account the possibility of a sequel. If it’s 100% a standalone story, give it a clean ending and tie up the loose ends, pat yourself on the back for all of the clever foreshadowing everyone missed, and leave the protagonists and beloved secondary characters’ futures looking bright. 

~ How do you write a plot around a theme?... Most stories that have a central theme are born from answering a tough question. George Orwell’s 1984 asked “What would the world look like if totalitarianism ruled society?”. Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451 dealt with censorship and questioned whether bliss only belongs to the ignorant. Bottom line is, pick the theme you want to explore, and then ask yourself the tough questions. The story should be the process by which you find the answer. 

~ What is the best way to handle a large cast within a plot?... You have your main conflict and the plotline that surrounds it, and then you have various subplots, around 2-3 where you explore the world/characters further and immerse the reader in the stories. You can convince the reader to become invested in a large number of characters by making them heavily involved in the subplots. They should all touch the main plot considerably, but the bulk of their development should be in the subplot, and if you were to have 15 characters, you’d want around 3 subplots where 3-5 of them were important players. However, large casts that reader’s have trouble keeping up with is a problem that usually results from a writer’s inability to make cuts or combinations. Remember: the reader’s experience is the most important thing. It’s better to downsize your ideas than lose your readers altogether. 

Other Resources From My Blog That Help With This:

What Do You Do When You Over-Plan?

Resources For Plot Development

How To Write A Good Plot Twist

How To Foreshadow

Writing Long Stories Without Filler

Writing Stories About Your Own Experiences

Novel Planning 101

Tackling Subplots

Things A Reader Needs From A Story

How To Turn A Good Idea Into A Good Story

Planning A Scene

When To Stop Planning

How To Outline Outside Chapter Structure

Tips on Mapping Out A Series

Outlining By Chapter

How To Outline Effectively

Tips On Starting A Scene

How To Start A Novel

Character Driven vs. Plot Driven Stories

Plot Structures

Planning A Scene In A Story

Effective Ways Of Planning Chapters

Writing Meaningful Stories

Finding Your Own Writing Style

How To Write A Story Timeline

Making A Story Come Together

Tips on Planning A Series

Coming Up With Scene Ideas

General Resources For Plot Development

How To Engage The Reader

Coming Up With “Original” Ideas

Building Upon A Good Premise

Pacing Appropriately

–

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[writtenvisionary]

Do It Again - fanfic

Read on Ao3

He sighs, stealing a long glance at the beautiful girl standing by her locker. Her friends surround her, listening eagerly to her story. She talks with her hands — her small hands with nails painted pink \ and the smile on her face is contagious as she becomes increasingly more immersed in her tale by the minute.

His heart skips a beat when she laughs. He can hear it all the way from down the school hall and he has to look away. If he didn't, who knows how long he'd last.

She's breathtakingly gorgeous and adorable all wrapped in one petite human. He doesn't think there could be anyone more perfect.

He wants to hold her. He's not so sure why. But he wants her friends to go away. He wants to ask — right now.

It's taking forever. Good heavens, he can't wait any longer. And god knows that girl can ramble.

A grin forms on his face at the thought (and he's sure he looks ridiculous, but he can't bring himself to care).

Man, he's whipped.

Her friends are finally gone, he realizes.

He must have been lost in his own thoughts (about her) for so long that he never noticed their absence.

She turns back to face her locker, opening it with ease.

Shit. Now's my chance.

Swallowing his nerves, he takes a step forward.

Progress. Progress.

Another step. Then he stops.

I can't.

He watches as she pulls out a textbook and expertly opens her backpack with her other hand. He's mesmerized by her abilities. He's mesmerized by her.

Ah, shit. Focus!

He manages another step towards her.

Then suddenly her backpack is zipped closed and her locker is secured once again. Her dark locks flow so elegantly through the air as she whips around.

They meet eyes. She smiles. He nearly trips.

Shit, shit, fuck.

"Hey!"

Is she talking to me?

"Why aren't you moving?"

The melodious sound of her giggle blesses his ears once again. He tries not to smile like a complete idiot, but he fails.

Just his luck.

He forces himself out of his frozen state, pushing back his irrational fears (making their presence known only at this very moment) and takes those last. few. steps. to stand in front of the girl. The girl who will hopefully be his girl, very soon.

When he arrives to his mark, he exhales in relief.

He's pleasantly surprised that he didn't trip and fall on his way there.

—

"Hi," he mutters, nervously. Rolling his lips in, he waits.

"Hi," she giggles.

He takes a deep breath and just goes for it.

"Will you go out with me?"

Her eyes light up in pure excitement.

To say he's relieved at this immediate reaction would be an understatement.

But then her excited expression turns… playful?

Realistically, he shouldn't be worried.

For some reason, he is.

"That depends," she starts, with that beautiful voice which sounds very seductive and oh my god her hand is on my chest—

"What do you have planned?"

Gulp.

—

"I'll pick you up at eight…"

"Uh huh…"

"And we can drive around?" He suggests.

"Mm, sounds nice already."

He gains some confidence, "I'll take you to the beach and then we can head downtown?"

She seems to think about it for a moment.

"Hmm… can I hold your hand?"

He smiles.

"We'll walk around downtown while you hold my hand," he confirms.

Licking his lips, he takes a small step forward, pulling her closer to his chest.

"Then we'll park and lay down on the hood of my car…"

Her smile widens.

"…We can just listen to the airplanes while we count the stars."

This time, her heart picks up. She can nearly feel it beating out of her chest.

"Tonight," he finishes, "I'll be your man."

She wishes she could stop smiling.

"On one condition."

"Yes?"

The innocence in his voice strikes her in the right place. Her smile is still unwavering.

"Tomorrow, we can do it again."

—

He wishes he had more to give her. Somehow, the beach and downtown and airplanes and stars just weren't enough. She was his everything; his world. And he wishes he could give her the world right back.

Because a girl that shines as bright as she does; a girl that is rich in everything but money and fame; a girl that pays attention to him even when he doesn't deserve it…

A girl like her is too good to be true.

Too good for him.

As he snuggles the stuffed dolphin she gifted him for their one-week-aversary, he sighs.

She deserves better than him.

He wishes he had the world to give. He would give it in a heartbeat, no questions asked.

Maybe then, he would feel good enough for her. Maybe then, he would feel like he was rich in something, like her.

Maybe then, he'd be rich with love.

And he knows for a fucking fact that he would give her everything he had.

Every. Single. Thing.

—

She had one condition.

And he didn't follow it.

Obviously, she didn't mean tomorrow, tomorrow… right? Because it's been a little over a week.

A WEEK.

But he's not one to break his promises. Would that be considered a promise?

He thinks so.

His finger hovers over the little phone icon at the corner of her contact page. He wants to call her, he does. Her voice is the reason he wakes up in the morning. Hearing it would be amazing right now.

No, that's not the problem.

You see, he doesn't want to admit it, but he's nervous.

Will she be mad if I ask now?

The answer is no, for the record. He's pretty sure he knows that.

'I was kidding,' she'll reassure him.

Deep breaths. You got this.

"Hey, what's—"

"Do you want to go out with me?"

He face palms.

But her gorgeous laugh floats through the phone's speaker and into his ears. He pulls his hand away from his face.

"Silly goose, what are you talking about? We're already—"

"I promised you we'd do it again, so we're doing it again. It may not be tomorrow, like you said a week ago, but it can be tonight."

Her silence on the line gives him a moment to glance at the clock.

7:47.

"Look, I'll be there in 10 minutes. I've got it all planned."

—

That laugh keeps him going. Her smile helps him sleep at night. The feeling of her warm, small hand in his is a gentle reminder that she's there. With him, in this moment of time.

It's all he could ever ask for.

Cars past them as they walk along the strip of stores open downtown. Colorful lights flash on around the couple as it starts to get dark, and their feet guide them around the town, coming full circle.

The lights that were once off are now on, leaving no corner of the little city dimmed.

She stops in her tracks, staring in awe at twinkling lights, which hang from a small gazebo near the park. Her eyes sparkle in amazement, mouth agape.

"Surprise?"

"Oh my goodness, you—"

"I just put the lights on it," he chuckles, "The gazebo was already there."

She shakes her head, "How come I never noticed it before?"

"You were probably laughing at a really bad joke you had just told."

"I don't tell bad jokes!"

"Uh huh."

A giggle erupts out of her throat, to her dismay.

"So… no car rooftop star-gazing tonight?"

He gives a very prominent shake of his head before pulling his hand out of hers'.

"Oh no, we're still doing that. But right now I want to just look at you."

She tilts her head in confusion.

He clarifies, "I don't want to look at the stars or listen to planes or anything. I want to admire you. And your beauty."

A reddish tint overcomes both her cheeks.

"And your intelligence. And your—"

"Shut up," she mutters.

"Okay. For now."

The new couple is silent for a minute as he starts making his way under the gazebo. She follows. He turns to stares at her.

It's not weird. She doesn't know why it's not weird. Like, he's literally just STARING at her and that should creep her out but it doesn't.

Is that a problem?

No. Because when she looks into his deep, brown eyes, she is reminded of the kind-hearted person who carried her books on the first day of classes. When she looks at his blonde locks, she has the urge to run her fingers through it for hours on end. When she looks to his lips, she finds herself wanting to feel them. On hers'.

Now that's definitely weird.

He takes a step closer.

But is it?

He starts leaning in.

If she does too, she doesn't notice.

Suddenly, their lips collide. Melding in perfect harmony; moving in sync. Her fingers live out their dream, running through his hair. His hands rest on her hips, gently pulling her closer.

Lost in their own world, they imagine what it's like to live their lives together. Kids, birthdays, a house, and so much more. It all flashes right before them.

It's over too quick, they think (and it might be awkward to go back for more).

But the night isn't over yet.

—

The stars are beautiful, but not as beautiful as her eyes, in his opinion. Not as beautiful as her laugh, or smile, or personality.

Nobody is really traveling tonight. One airplane so far.

He's ready to book his own flight.

To his honeymoon.

Realistically, he's in way over his head. It's been a week.

His parents will say he's not ready for marriage; that he doesn't know what love is.

Pfft. Yeah, right.

This girl is love. He knows it when he sees it.

He bites his lip. It's too early. He doesn't want to ruin what they have.

But, "I love you."

FUCK. DID HE SAY THAT OUT LOUD?

He must have gotten extra lucky, because—

"I love you, too."

—

Being by her side is one thing, but being welcomed to glide his hands over her body makes him feel alive.

Her lips are fruity. She is beautiful. He wants her.

This is way different than she anticipated. Holding his hand was level one, and now she feels like she's on top of the world.

His lips are soft. He is dashing. She wants him.

Awkward as it was, their bodies moved in perfect harmony.

He couldn't deny it.

She couldn't deny it.

They were made for each other in every way possible.

Soulmates. They were soulmates.

And they only had half an hour before her parents came home.

Neither wanted to rush it, but it was their time.

"Let's just take this moment," he had whispered in her ear just minutes earlier. "It's ours, okay?"

His eyes flicker down to her lips, "You don't want to waste it, do you?"

—

'I'm not sure," she matches his whisper. "It-it's only been a few months and I—"

He breathed, "I love you."

It tickled her face, his breath, and she used every ounce of will not to lean just a millimeter closer.

Their lips were about to connect.

"I'm not ready."

"You'll never be ready, minou…"

She hesitated.

"Babe, I…" she sighed and shook her head. "I can't."

"You don't want to miss out on this. On us. Please."

All she could come up with was, "We'll regret it, A—"

"There is nothing to regret."

"There is a lot to regret."

He was silent for a moment.

But then he smirked.

"Like what?"

"Like… do we have protection?"

A teasing look was sent her way.

"I always keep it in my bag," he offered.

She pondered, then—

"It's too early. We're too young."

"It's not too early," he licked his lips, "And I'd rather experience this when I'm young.

"Before I fade away."

She gulped, searching his brown eyes in the darkness.

"Regrets don't fade away," she stated firmly.

He nodded.

"Exactly."

Her head tilted in confusion. He reiterated.

"If this… us… is something we regret, then we won't fade away."

—

On their one year anniversary, he couldn't think of anything more fitting.

"So," he smiles dopily. "I've got it planned."

He doesn't need to say anything else; this has become routine.

She scrunches up her nose cutely, giving him a smile.

"Perfect. Pick me up at eight?"

"Precisely."

—

He gazes at the girl lying next to him.

The moonlight shines on her face. She's gorgeous.

"Oooh," she exclaims quietly, pointing up above them.

He follows her finger, his eyes landing on the moon.

"That's—" he giggles, "That's the moon, silly goose."

She turns her head to look at him and smiles.

"You're my moon. And my goose," she chuckles.

He mimics her chuckle.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

She shrugs.

"If I could go anywhere…" she starts, in lieu of a response. "I wouldn't.

"I'm happy right here, with you right next to me, as we fall asleep under the stars just for our parents to call and wake us up."

He lets out a laugh at that, grabbing ahold of the small hand resting on her chest.

She continues, "You're mine. And I'm so glad that I can call you mine."

—

The blonde grins.

"Remember when I first asked you out?" He asks.

"How could I forget?"

His smile wavers as he turns serious, meeting her eyes.

"I said that I'll be your man."

"And you are."

"But I only said for that night."

She raises an eyebrow.

"Your point?"

He smiles again, "I'm really happy you agreed."

"Of course. You're amazing."

"And so are you," he pecks her nose.

They fall into a comfortable silence, watching the stars yet again.

And… just loud enough so she can hear, he speaks softly.

"I'll be your man tonight, and forever… and I'll give you everything I can. I promise."

She looks over at him again, admiring his side profile.

His skin shines in the moonlight so magnificently. It's almost royal.

She gulps.

The heaviness of the statement hit her hard.

Taking a deep breath, she responds.

"I promise, too."

- And tomorrow we can do it again -

[iron--spider]

Okay, so. Cherry. I loved Cherry. 

Behind the cut is a review of sorts, with some spoilers and some loving and some bitching! It’s very, very long.

The reviews and responses have been rolling in for months now, and there have been a few notorious critiques that had me worried. As most people who follow this blog know, I’m not the biggest fan of the Russos, for reasons that are obvious lmfao. I was hoping this would be a different situation, especially since I’ve gotten to watch a LOT of interviews where they’ve discussed why they made certain choices in the film, why it’s so personal to them, etc. But the early reactions really got me nervous and I was worried they’d botched this one. I got an early screening on February 12th through American Cinematheque, and I went in looking forward to Tom and anxious about everything else.

 I loved it. I loved every single choice that was made, on every single level. I’d like to preface this by saying I absolutely hated the book. Sure, it had moments, shining lines here and there, but overall I felt nothing for the main character and the stream of consciousness and the way the events were presented. The absolute lack of an ending. When I read the book I already knew Tom was gonna be in the movie, so I was building what I wanted the film to look like in my head.

 The narration. I knew we would need that to keep the story grounded, to give it a center, and they included that and it worked so beautifully. Breaking the fourth wall. The entire book you feel like this guy is talking to you, and if there was anything to carry over, it was that connection with the audience, but they enhanced it by paring it down and using his eye contact and words to us sparingly. A solid, almost unreliable POV from the main character, which they included in spades with all their different stylistic choices, from the different lenses to the names of the banks and the authority figures to the lack of information about particular things to the quick cuts in certain places and lingering shots in others. The stylistic choices were one of the main things, if not THE main thing, everybody has been complaining about, and I was truly sitting here expecting something outrageous. But it all flowed beautifully, it all felt extremely purposeful, and none of it took me out of the moment. In fact, all of it immersed me even deeper in the movie and the story, and made the lead even more real. We were seeing it all through his eyes, through his feelings, through his changing circumstances. It was an EXPERIENCE to me, a journey that needed these particular choices. I feel like the whole thing would have been more of an uphill battle had they not done the six chapters, so that’s another choice I felt like added to the film in a positive way and made it better. It also highlighted the changes that the main character was going through in such an excellent fashion, and added to the whole ‘odyssey’ feel.

 Before I get into speaking about Tom, I will speak critically for a second. I’ve seen this thing four times now, three viewings before the review embargo was up and one after. I tried to watch it from a different headspace and see what they were talking about. My opinion never really changed drastically, but I can acknowledge some things. I loved the ‘breaking the fourth wall’, but I do think there could have been more of it. It enhanced the movie a lot for me and there were a couple more moments where I could have gone for it (though I think people do miss some of the eye contact moments, such as the one in the car during the whole thing between James and Pills&Coke). I think the entire bit in the beginning is absolutely necessary to get to know our character and understand where he’s beginning, what his circumstances are, but I do think it pales in comparison to the rest of the movie. I didn’t notice the first couple times, but while he’s in the doctor’s office discussing pain levels/PTSD, there’s a cut to the doctor that’s literally a millisecond long that was pretty unnecessary. I can also say that the scene with Tommy (drunk guy in the bar) was one of those moments from the book that didn’t need to be included, though it’s clear that they were trying to test the character’s mettle for the upcoming war he’d have to participate in because of his bad choices, and it was also a look at a version of what he could (would) become after he got home. But it didn’t really need to be in there.

 Those are literally the only things I “didn’t like”, and even then that’s the wrong phrasing, because I liked everything lmfao.

 Ciara was a casting choice I questioned initially, purely because she has such a young-looking face, but I was completely incorrect about doubting her. She killed it. She’s such a natural actress and she was able to meet Tom beat by beat in such a difficult story. Their chemistry was lovely. In fact, I loved all of the supporting characters and what they added to the story. They made the whole experience that much more real.

 Now, Tom. I mean. You guys know I love him and a lot of people like to say that if you have a bias towards someone, your opinion counts less when it comes to judging them. But I feel like there’s a reason why I have this bias to begin with, and it’s because Tom’s talent is just undeniable. He always pulls me in, he always makes me excited for what’s next, he is everything I want to see in an actor. He brought Peter to life in a way that had never been done before, and he uplifts every single movie he touches. This one really gets me particularly emotional because he’s said on so many different occasions that Cherry means a lot to him, because of the work he put in and because of the message it carries and because of the people he met and learned about during the whole process. I just—there are hardly any words big enough or meaningful enough to even describe his performance. It’s one for the ages. It’s agonizing and heartbreaking and mammoth. It is truly special. I know that they changed the book a lot, so this is based on a real person and his real experiences, but in the end it’s more of a composite of what Nico was at the time and not an exact replica—so I feel safe in saying that Tom, through this huge, powerhouse of a performance, created an entire person that felt so, so real. You can feel his past and all the memories in his head and the way he thinks about things. You can imagine what he’d say about something in a scene without him actually saying it. This character changes so drastically from the first scene to the last, and yet you still feel like you know him as he progresses through his journey. Tom expertly weathers every single nuance, every time the character experiences a moment that will push him further into darkness, every hesitation despite falling headfirst into such mistakes. I love Tom because he’s so subtle even in his bigger moments, and by this I mean he’s always got layers upon layers upon layers going on in each individual moment. Like the hospital scene in particular, after Emily’s overdose. There’s so much going on with Tom’s character there, from the deep horror in possibly losing the love of his life, to the heavy shame he feels in having facilitated her journey here. Just the way his voice hitches as he tries to help, while still hiding what they’ve done. The way he avoids the nurses’ gazes as he’s trying to connect with them to get an answer about her well-being. The way he almost deflates when he finally reveals that she took heroin. He is phenomenal. Every moment and every movement tells you more about this character, and that’s just down to Tom’s incredible talent. 

 Tom deep dives into every moment and commits fully. People have asked me what my favorite scene in this film is and it’s so hard because the entire thing is just a showcase of just how good he is. The bus station scene in particular stands out, because it’s one of those moments where he just truly disappears. The entire movie you hardly remember you’re watching Tom, but in that scene it’s like you’re there, like you’re actually witnessing this heart wrenching moment between two broken people. The way he shrinks into himself with that horrific shame after what’s happened to her. The complete and utter pain in his eyes when she tells him there’s no stopping what she plans to do. Tom never ever seems like one of those actors who knows what’s coming, who has rehearsed this moment or that moment over and over and over again. Everything is natural, everything comes as it comes and that’s why what he does feels so real. He isn’t acting. He is becoming.

 The Russos have said more than one time that they chose Tom for this role because he’s so likable and you feel empathy and sympathy for him, and that’s also one of the best changes from the book. The character feels so far from you in the book, you feel so disconnected from him, but Tom just has something that connects you with him, that makes you root for him. Every single time. He’s one of the most immensely watchable actors I’ve ever seen. If this was any other “indie” actor, any of the Hollywood favorite directors, I know this film would have been an awards darling. 

 That leads me to how critics are behaving. This movie was not the movie they made it out to be. They have loved films that are so much more outrageous in terms of story and filmmaking choices, and yet they’re acting like this is the craziest most off the wall thing they’ve ever seen. It’s really really whack and over the top to me. These ~film~ people, professionals and “film Twitter” have gotten it in their heads that as soon as someone is involved with Marvel movies that they’re suddenly damaged goods, can’t act, can’t do their jobs. I feel like Scarlett is the only one who’s escaped from this, with JoJo and Marriage Story, though the latter did get some slack, too. It drives me insane when all of these people writing about Tom are like “oh this is such a departure from Spider-Man!” No, Spider-Man is a departure from all his previous films. The vast majority of his movies are dramas. His first movie was The Impossible! But despite all this, critics love to shit on him and bring him down because he’s Spider-Man. It absolutely doesn’t help that this was helmed by the Russos, in fact it hurts the situation even more. Critics revel in bringing them down, in acting like they’re glorified for no reason. And like I said, they’re not my favorite, but these critics knew what their opinion was gonna be before they even watched Cherry. And they held onto that no matter what they actually felt. Thankfully, MOST of them are acknowledging how wonderful and impressive Tom was. But whatever score this movie has on RT now (a site that should be abolished, frankly) it doesn’t deserve something so low. 

 I understand film is subjective. But these people don’t seem to. I hate the gleeful “Cherry is bad!” bullshit, which goes beyond criticism so many times, is always extremely exaggerated, and acts as if because this particular person believes it’s bad, then everyone else should as well, and if they don’t, they don’t understand film. I’m tired of this shit and I’m tired of them underestimating and trying to stop Tom in his tracks. They want so desperately for this MARVEL BAD narrative to be true that they’ll rip these people apart whenever they get the opportunity. It felt very strange to have already seen the movie when the embargo was lifted, because it was like “did they see the same movie I saw?”

 After all that, I’d just like to say, do not be influenced by people like that. That’s what they want. They want you to listen to them and completely write off the movie, forgoing to see it at all. Please make your own decisions—if you love Tom, this is not something to be missed. He is a revelation. I personally, and wholeheartedly, think it was a beautiful movie. I’m gonna watch it again. It reminded me of so many of my favorites, and it rose above them too. It did not shy away from its subject, it is a cautionary tale, but it is told with love, with care and with kindness. It’s clear this was done by people who are close to the subject, who want people who struggle with PTSD and drug use to come out of the shadows they’re forced into and get the help they deserve. Cherry is so rewatchable to me, and it’s so staggering to see Tom just shine here. He is the best actor of his generation. And he’s only getting better.

[jpegjade]

Writer’s Block - Spencer

IT HAS BEEN A LIL BIT SINCE I ACTUALLY COMPLETED SOMETHING. literally i’m jumping from job to job. i barely found time to write this lmao. 

this is for the lovely anon who requested this: can we have a fic where the reader has writer’s block and spencer is helpful? 

here you go anon, HELPFUL SPENCER 

warnings: all fluff and a lil bit of a reference talking about weight but it’s all fluff and nothing seriously deep. 

_____________

“Ugh.” You yelled, throwing your hands in the air. “This is pointless.” 

Spencer was sitting at his desk when he looked up to see you having a partial meltdown on your shared apartment couch. 

“Please tell me why I decided to do this. I can’t think of a single reason why anyone would go through this torture willingly.” You groaned to Spencer, who just smiled in response. 

You were glad he found this so amusing because you surely didn’t think any of it was cute in the slightest. 

“You’ve got a psychological inability to produce a substantial amount of content to satisfy your drive to create.” Spencer continued smiling at you. 

“Cliff Notes version, please. I’m mentally spent.” You said, looking over at him. 

“Writer’s block.” He said, as if he couldn’t just say that in the beginning. 

“At the worst time possible.” You said, groaning again. 

As an author, you were used to the words coming to you easily. There were so many ways to describe a single feeling that you just knew how to craft the language most of the time. It’s one of the many things that made Spencer fall in love with you: You crafted a world of your own through imagination and you were able to pull other people in to experience it with you. It was something special about you that set you apart from so many other writers in your genre. 

Getting up from his chair, Spencer walked over to your spot on the couch to sit next to you. He put his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into him. 

“How far have you gotten on your story?” Spencer said, leaning over to see your laptop screen. You turned it away from him so he couldn’t see anything. 

“Baby, you know I don’t like you to see my works in progress. I only want you to see things when they’re complete.” You said. 

“Baby, I want to see every stage of your creativity no matter how rough.” Spencer smiled. “Maybe I can offer some advice and corrections.” 

“I don’t want you to see everything bc plot holes and such. And I don’t want you to know the plot until it’s complete.” You closed your computer screen so he couldn’t see anything. 

You turned to stare at him as he pulled his arm back, leaving on the back of the couch. The two of you stared at each other, both holding your own secrets. 

Your secret was that you secured a book deal for a Young Adult book. While the signatures were still needed for paycheck negotiations to close, you were holding out on telling Spencer until your manager confirmed everything was official. The call could come at any minute so you were checking your phone every few minutes. You weren’t superstitious but you didn’t want to tell Spencer something before it was completely confirmed. You didn’t want to get your hopes up but more importantly, you didn’t want to disappoint Spencer. He was so proud of you for your constant writing and he loved to read your stories after you sent them to your editor for content when your story was chosen for different magazines, contests, and blogs. If you secure this book deal, it will be huge for you and Spencer, making your dream come true. 

Spencer’s secret was that he was off for a month. He just got back from a case that lasted 3 weeks and before that, he was gone for the larger part of 2 months. There were a lot of back to back cases that ran right behind each other. The two of you made a sarcastic joke that it was serial killer season because it was like clockwork that these cases would come in. It was sad that so many people were hurt and killed in the process but there were countless lives saved by the team and their constant, tiring work. They needed some time off, especially with the last case draining them so greatly. 

“I won’t push you but just know, I’m excited about everything you do. I’m so proud of you for being so persistent in everything. You know, the word persistent is a great word to describe you because it’s more than just the determination to accomplish a task, although many people use it in conjunction with the word. Based on the definition by the Miriam-Webster dictionary, the word persistent means to exist for a long or longer than usual time continuously. You’ve been determined to continue your writing but it’s more than that. You’ve evolved from only writing for whoever will read your work to writing for yourself. You connect with...” Spencer wanted to go on before he noticed your phone vibrating. 

“Hold on, Spence. I’m so sorry.” You said, pulling out your phone. 

It was a text message from your agent. 

“Closed and complete. Sealed the deal. Mucho bueno mi amor.” Your agent followed that text with celebration emojis and you couldn’t look away. By calling you her love, your agent meant nothing by it any more than you called your friends your girlfriends. Your agent knew you well so she was very friendly. 

Your heart was beating a mile a minute, your breathing strained. You didn’t know whether you wanted to laugh or cry, or both at the same time. It was real. It was really real. It was entirely real. A tear ended up slipping through the floodgates, quickly followed by another. Spencer immediately saw the shift in your body language before you were able to hide it. 

“What’s wrong?” Spencer said, worry crossing his face. He didn’t understand how such a happy moment could go south so quickly. 

“It’s not you.” You said, trying to hold back the fact that you were ready to start sobbing. You wiped the tears away and put your hands back in your lap. Fresh tears were right behind those and you weren’t going to stop them this time. You hung your head, chin barely touching your chest, watching the tears fall on your hands. 

“What is it? You can tell me, lovely.” Spencer grabbed your hands from resting in your lap. His thumb immediately began gently rubbing your hands, which only made you cry harder. 

Readjusting how he sat so he could pull you into his lap, Spencer was so confused and so hurt because he didn’t know how to fix it. He couldn’t fix it when he didn’t know what was wrong. He just wanted you to be okay and you seemed far from it. You fought him a little bit. 

“I’m going to flatten you.” You said, finally calming down. 

“Then I will be the happiest flat man alive. You won’t flatten me, lovely. You’ll put your cute butt in my lap, swing your arms around my shoulders, and hang onto me for dear life as you let go of whatever just happened. You don’t have to feel alone if you’re sad.” Spencer said. 

You got up, sat on the couch next to him, and put your legs over his. It was much more comfortable that way and made you less self-conscious. He was staring at you with his puppy eyes and it melted your heart all over again. 

“I have something to tell you.” You said, taking a deep breath. 

“Okay…” Spencer looked concerned, stoic even. He was even a little bit scared. 

“I’ve been hiding something from you and I feel so bad about it.” Tears sprang to your eyes again. 

“Lovie, whatever it is, we can work through it. There are very few things in this world you can tell me that I would be upset about. I”ve seen the worst of the worst. Working out a minor bump won’t break me.” Spencer slightly smiled. 

“No, no. It’s not bad. I promise it’s not.” You let out a sigh you didn’t know you were holding. “I got a book deal.” 

Spencer was silent for a second before he broke out in the biggest smile you had seen from him in a while. He obviously didn’t have a problem being happy as his emotion. Joy overcame him and he gently put your legs on the ground and stood up just to kneel in front of you to cover you in kisses. He kissed every major part of your face before kissing you. A slow, gentle kiss but it still took your breath away. 

“You know you’re amazing, right? You deserve this out of anyone.” Spencer held your face gently in his hands, his thumb slowly rubbing your cheek.  

“I’m stuck, Spence. How am I supposed to finish the book when I can’t even finish the short story I’m writing.” You couldn’t meet his eyes. 

“Maybe I can help. What’s it about?” Spencer stood up, sitting back on the couch next to you. 

“It’s the story of this brilliant teacher who moonlights as a spy. Not the most original idea but it’s not supposed to be original. It’s just a short story that someone requested on my blog.” You grabbed your computer and put it back on your lap. 

“So you’re writing about me.” Spencer smiled. 

“You’re not a spy. You moonlight as a teacher.” You said, opening your computer. You couldn’t bear to look at Spencer’s face right now as he thought about how you were basically writing about him. 

You always took character inspiration from him. He was such a big part of your life that all of your writing had hints of Spencer in them, no matter how hard you tried to leave him out of things. So it was a big deal for him to even figure out that he was largely related to this story. 

“What if…” Spencer started, “You wrote about his dashing butt?” Spencer said, beaming at you. 

You choked on your spit. 

“What?” You said, in between coughs.

“His fabulous behind in pants. You’re always telling me how amazing I look in my black slacks. So why not write about that for fun? I’m sure your blog readers would be quite amused.” Spencer was so hilariously serious that you couldn’t stop laughing. 

“Okay, fine. You win. I will put in something about your butt.” You said, turning your computer on. 

“And insert something about his beautifully flowing hair.” Spencer said. 

“Baby, your hair is short right now.” You said. He allowed you to cut his hair a few days ago and he missed his longer hair but he really liked when you gave him haircuts. 

“I know but if he’s a badass super spy and a teacher, he needs to have versatile looks.” Spencer ran his hand through his hair, a new habit he started when you cut his hair. 

“Baby, you’re going to overwhelm me with ideas.” You said, chuckling. You felt a little better about the writer’s block and the book deal the more Spencer made you laugh. 

“Good. Maybe we should go on a walk and figure out more ideas. Exercise is good for ideas because your blood flow to your brain is increased. You also get mental clarity. Over the next 6 weeks, we can do that more.” Spencer quickly walked to the door to grab both of your running shoes. 

Sitting down next to you, what he said finally hit you. 

“Next six weeks?” You asked, putting your computer on the coffee table. 

You didn’t care that all you were wearing were some cozy shorts and an old t-shirt that was way too big for you. 

“Oh, I didn’t tell you.” Spencer got his right shoe on after a little bit of struggle. “I’m off for 6 weeks after the last case. We all need the break…” He said, his eyes going to a dark place for a moment. You gently touched his arm and came back to life, in the moment with you. 

“So… You can help me?” Your mood got significantly better as you realized he was all yours for 6 weeks. 

“Every step of the way, y/n.” Spencer said, popping up from the couch in his shoes, ready to go.

[iliumheightnights]

We have a jedi [8] | Peter Parker x M!Stark Reader

Fandom: Star wars and Marvel

Pairing: Peter Parker x M!Stark Reader, Tony Stark x Son!Reader

Summary: (M/N) discovers earth has some secrets.

Read from beginning

The sound of tools and workers filled the warehouse. (M/N) followed Fury up some stairs to an overlook of the ship. There he was able to see workers fixing the ship with Janai overlooking it. He wasn’t sure just how he felt about so many people crawling around their ship. Not that there was anything to steal...but they didn’t want any information to be taken,any one could be a spy for the empire. 

“So you’re Stark’s son. I keep tabs on everything around the avengers so imagine my surprise when I discovered he had a son I didn’t know about.” The man looked at me like how some of the masters back at the temple did, it was unnerving. “And you come from space. Your mother told me about some of what’s going on. A galactic war? I knew something would happen in space...didn’t know just how big it would be.”

This man was acting surprisingly calm for learning about a large war in space. I leaned on the railing and looked at him. “You don’t seem so shocked. I’m guessing we aren’t the first person from space you’ve met?”

Fury nodded his head. “Your right about that. Hell I’ve even been to space. It’s one of the reasons why the avengers were created...in case a threat from space ever came. It was also if a threat from earth got too big, but space is a big mystery with lots of dangers.” (M/N) laughed at that. “You’re definitely right about that. If only it was a blue milk run.”

The man looked at him in a weird way. “So I have to ask. If Jedi and Sith exist...is all of Star wars real?”

“What’s Star Wars?”

…

“So apparently there's a movie series about Jedi and Sith?”

“Oh that, yeah that’s just propaganda used to try and make planets more likely to develop space travel.”

“Then why did most of the jedi get killed off?”

“You have to have some drama.”

…

A couple days had passed since their arrival. (M/N) had told Janai about his vision and warning of Darth Kren. With what they knew, fixing the ship became an even higher priority. Progress had been going alright with the help of Tony and Bruce. Along with progress on the ship, (M/N) had been spending time with the avengers.

He of course spent the most amount of time with his father. He had met Pepper and talked more with Happy. Tony would take him out to see different hotspots and interesting things he thought he’d like. (M/N) was happy when doing this, it made him forget about the war going on for a bit. He also spent time with the others, he’d spend time with Bruce in the lab either teaching or learning. He’d often practice hand to hand combat with Natasha if she was available. At first she was a little hesitant with how young he was, but that changed after he one upped her in their first practice. After Thor returned from taking Loki back to Asgard, the two would talk about war stories. Asgard wasn’t part of the galactic war, but they definitely had a history of conquest. Steve and him would talk strategies. Steve wanted to learn about new strategies and techniques the team could use and came to him and Janai for advice since they had experience with fighting in space. Clint was the closest with (M/N) after his own father. The man practically acted as a second dad and made sure he was always alright. He’d make sure he ate and got the necessities before he’d take him out to something like the park or for ice cream.

“Where are you guys going?” (M/N) watched as all of the avengers paced around the tower, getting ready for their mission. He noticed how the quinjet had been prepared. “Oh it’s just a simple shake down mission. Some idiots think playing with alien tech is a good idea so we have to go take it from them.” Tony said to him. “Don’t worry bud, we’ll be there and back in no time.” Clint chimed in. “Hey he’s my kid.” Clint snorted. “He’s our kid now.” (M/N) rolled his eyes at that. “Girls,Girls you’re both pretty. Now go on.” The two shook their heads, Clint patted his shoulder and Tony gave him a hug before walking off to finish their preparations.

(M/N) had turned to go back to his room when he heard a low whistle. Turning around, he looked to see who was calling him. When he didn’t see anyone turned back around only to hear the whistle again. He once more turned back and glared. What was going on? Then he heard the whistle from inside the quinjet. He felt a surge of energy rush through him and push him a little, it was then he realized the force was guiding him. He watched as the avengers all entere the jet, they would never take him with them...he’d have to sneak on.

Once the last of them had entered and he heard the engines begin to roar, he made his move. He quickly dashed to the ship and jumped inside as the door was closing. Luckily he hadn’t been spotted yet and hid himself behind some seats. He felt the jet begin to take off, unlike his ship you could still feel the turbulence. He moved around a bit, he had a feeling he was going to be there for a while, might as well be comfortable.

They had been flying for a couple hours, he had heard bits of conversations here and there. Eventually when they had gotten closer to their destination, The avengers gathered around a holographic table. “Alright, so we don’t know much about who these guys are. All we know is they took a good amount of alien tech from new york and high tailed it here.” Steve began the brief. (M/N) listened to all of it, he needed as much information as he could get. Why was the force calling him out here? “Our goal is to receive all the tech and to capture all of them. We don’t need them trying to get anymore. One invasion was enough.” That was his dad. He smirked at that, (M/N) didn’t want to fight another invasion again just yet. It wasn’t long before the jet landed and the team all rushed out to where they were supposed to go.

Exiting his hiding spot and leaving the jet he discovered he was surrounded by jungle. He could sense the force here, it was strong. He looked towards where his father and the other avengers had went and was about to follow when he heard the whistle calling him in the other direction. Giving one last look to the path the avengers took, he turned and walked the other way.

The path through the jungle was thick and teeming with life. It reminded him of being on Kashyyyk, except there were no giant Wroshyr trees. He could sense the many different life forms moving through the thick jungle canopy. The low whistle continued to call out to him until he found himself at a large crevice. He could hear the call through it. Taking a deep breath, he began to squeeze his way through. Finally he made it to the other side, it was dark and he couldn’t see anything. Taking his lightsaber, he ignited it to use as a light source. The light didn’t show anything useful except that he was in a cave. He continued to follow the call.

Walking for what seemed like ages, he finally arrived at a door. “Huh, what do we have here?” Moving his saber for better lighting he discovered the symbol of the Jedi on the door. “Jedi? What were we doing here?” Looking over the door, he saw there was no way to open it which meant one thing. Stepping back he reached out his hand and with the force, opened the door. With the door open, light was able to enter the cave. Walking through the door he turned off his saber and looked around. He was in a hallway which seemed to be a back exit of sorts. 

Walking down the rest of the hallway he found himself in a larger corridor. It was dusty and he could tell whatever this place was had been abandoned a long time ago. Old banners hung on the walls, many torn and tattered. The carpets were also in pretty bad shape. Exiting the corridor he was currently in he found himself in a large room, larger than even the main room in the Jedi temple on Tython. That’s when he realized it, this was a jedi temple. From the looks of it, it had been abandoned a long time ago.

Suddenly the room brightened and when the light cleared, the temple was different. It was bright, and the temple was filled with Jedi. The fountains below were flowing and the sound of younglings running around could be heard. He smiled at the sight. As quickly as it came, he was pushed from his vision and returned to the dreary desolate temple. “What happened here?”

The sound of a motor could be heard, it was faint like it was far away but coming towards him. It didn’t feel like a threat...yet. Suddenly he could see the maker of the sound across the hall. An astromech...an old astromech. “I guess this place isn’t as derelict as I thought.” The little droid saw him and seemed to jump a bit before rushing to try and reach him. Deciding to meet it halfway, (M/N) began making his way over to it.

Upon reaching the droid he knelt down to it’s level. The droid beeped happily at him. “Hey there little guy. What’s your name?” Beeepweer. “T3? It’s nice to meet you T3, I’m (M/N).” Bweepeep. “Do you know what happened here?” Bwooo. “Sith. I should have known it was the sith.” bwooh. “How long have you been here?” Bweeawamp. “Six hundred years? That was long before this war. How are you still charged?” Bwaaamp. “Stasis shutdown? So you were put in shut down until you felt someone comeback? So that person was me?” Bwoop. “Well...I’m glad I could help.” He felt a strong sense of cold come from the door besides them, but the whistle also called to him from in there. “I feel like I have to go in there. What is that place.” Bweep Bwoomp. “The Jedi council chambers? Then why does it feel so...dark.” bwoo. “Slaughter you say? No wonder it’s so cold. But I have to go in there. Wish me luck.” With a deep breath (M/N) entered the doorway.

Entering the old council chamber, he felt colder than he ever had. T3 had told him a slaughter happened here, but only now did he feel just how bad it was. He could feel the death that happened here. There was a lot of it.

“Look at you.” The voice came from a figure who stepped out of the shadows. The figure was dressed in dark armor. Stepping further out of the shadow (M/N)’s eyes widened at who it was. The figure...was him. “You’re weak.”

“W-what is this?”

“You could be much stronger.” Without a response, the other him ignited his lightsaber and lunged at him. (M/N) blocked it with his own. He then noticed how the other him had a red blade. A sith. “You call yourself a Jedi, yet all I see is a weakling.” The other him had gained the upper hand and seemed much stronger than he was. 

“I...I am a Jedi.”

“Are you? What kind of jedi actively ignores the rules of the order? Your attachments already make you not a Jedi. Break your chains!”

“I will be no sith!”

“You will never be a true Jedi!”

He was right. He never felt like he was a jedi and this other half knew it. “You’re right.” He used the force to push the other him back. Giving enough space, he turned off his saber. “I am no jedi.”  He dropped to his knees and closed his eyes. He waited for death to come. When he felt nothing come he opened his eyes to discover he was once again in that place he had spoken to Revan. He heard the low whistle once more and looked to see what was causing it. A kyber crystal. Grabbing the crystal he once again found himself in the council chamber, crystal in hand. “Huh...I guess it’s time.”

Looking around the council chamber, he discovered many discarded lightsabers from fallen jedi. “ I may never be a full jedi, but I will still try to be what you all believed in.” Closing his eyes he focused on the force. Parts and components from the discarded lights sabers broke off of them and gathered around his new crystal. After a couple of minutes he heard the final click as his new lightsaber fell into place. Grabbing the blade he ignited it and found a (Color) blade. “I will carry you with me and remember what you stood for.” He now had two lightsabers.

Exiting the council chambers he was once again greeted by T3. Bweep? (M/N) chuckled at him. “Yeah I’m fine. I found what I was looking for.” He looked at the little droid. “So what are you going to do now? Are you going to stay here?” Bwoop. “Well...Would you like to come with me? I could use a friend like you by my side.” The droid let out some happy beeps. “Good to know. It’s going to need some explaining to others but I’ll handle it. So, how do we get out of here?” The droid beeped and began rolling off.

(M/N) followed T3 to the bottom floor of the temple and through the main hall. After the vision he could feel the loss of what the temple looked like before. “Huh, What’s that?” T3 stopped and looked at him. (M/N) looked to another part of the wall where a mural was at. The mural had 3 figures, 2 men and 1 woman. “They seem...strangely familiar.” bweep. “Nothing, let’s go.” T3 and him continued through the main hall until they reached a large door. The little droid used a panel to open the door. The door opened and (M/N) found himself looking at the confused faces of the avengers. “Uh...hey guys.”

[muilkyu]

Surprise Party for Treasure

Request: Hi, can I request for Treasure to react to their s/o holding a surprise birthday party for them? Thanks 💎 

🐷 Hyunsuk

"Do I have to put it on?" Hyunsuk whines. 

You huff at him nodding, "Yes you do. Otherwise, you're going to ruin the surprise." 

You take the bandana wrapping it carefully around his head, tightening it. Pulling back you take a look at him. 

"See that wasn't so bad." You coo patting him on the cheek. He just sighs in response, reaching to grab your shoulders. 

"Let's go. Otherwise, the surprise might get impatient." 

Then you proceed to lead a very nervous Hyunsuk down the hall. He flinches at every sound he hears. When the air-conditioning turned on he yelped and squeezed your shoulder a little harder. 

When you make it to the room you can still hear shuffling instead. You told them to be done before 3. 

"Okay, we are here." 

Hyunsuk lets out a breath, "Can I take this off now? I want to get to my party."

"Might as well. You've ruined your own surprise." You complain. He reaches for the bandana yanking it off. Dramatically he takes a deep breath. 

Then the door is pushed open. An impatient Jihoon appears with a birthday cake shades on, "Hurry up lovebirds. The cake is going to be warm."

🐼 Jihoon

"Just out of 100% curiosity, what type of cake do you like?" 

Jihoon doesn't even bother looking up from his phone but answers anyways, "I don't mind the type of cake." 

"Okay good to know." 

Jihoon looks up from his phone, "I will say however I don't want an ice cream cake for the party though. They are messy and if you're inviting for the boys it's definitely a no go." 

You nod without thinking, humming in agreement. Completely miss the fact that Jihoon mentioned the surprise birthday he was not supposed to know about. Your mouth falls agape. 

Jihoon looks at you. A sly smile plants itself on his face. "Oh, the party. Yeah, you left your notepad wideout in the open. You know I don't think that confetti is a good idea, it's messy." 

"Jihoon You yell, slapping him on the shoulder, "Why did you let me ask if you already knew?" 

"Simple. You look adorable running around in circles trying not to tell me." 

The shook still hadn't set in. Thinking you were being careful all this was going to ruin the plans, "You let me run around making plans this whole time and you knew." 

"Yes, you really need to work on being more sneaky. Don't worry you have a great teacher right here."

🐯 Yoshi

"Is this all for me?" Yoshi's mouth is hanging open, he's surprised to see the balloons and streamers hanging from the wall. In a very last-minute printed paper in both Japanese and Korean a "Happy Birthday Yoshi" hangs from the wall. 

"Of course it's for you." 

"Wow, did you plan all of this?" 

You shake your head, "I had the idea, but when I brought it to your friends they insisted on helping." 

"What she means is that we planned most of it," Jeongwoo buds into the conversation. 

"Not true I texted all of you guys. I had to make an entire group chat," you defend. 

Yoshi laughs anyways, "Thank you for thinking of me." 

"That's kinda my job isn't it." You tease. 

Then the lights are turned off and the cake is brought in. Yoshi's smile is so bright as his party goes on.

🐨 Junkyu

"It isn't a surprise if you help plan it, fool."

Junkyu still pushes on writing down a few more ideas, "I just want to make it very clear. A plan is always a good idea."

"Your right, but not when it's for your own birthday," you point out.

He just shrugs, "I still want to help."

"The best way you can help is by letting me plan it."

Putting down the pen Junkyu huffs out a little breath, "Fine you can plan it."

"This isn't even a surprise party anymore. You already know."

"I'll pretend that I don't know. I am a very good actor." He then proceeds to make 3 different surprised faces. One with his hands over his chest a fake gasp escaping his mouth. The other two being a different variation.

"Wow, I didn't know I was dating an actor," you tease.

Junkyu looks proud, a smug look on his face, "See so I can help plan now."

"Still no."

🐹 Mashiho

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Mashiho, happy birthday to you," both you and Mashiho sing together. Both of you are sitting around his dorm living room table dressed in birthday hats. 

Playing around you take some of the frosting off the cake and place it on his nose, "Happy birthday. Your gift is me. Mainly because I spent all my money on your cake." 

Mashiho laughs, "This is the best present I could have gotten." 

"Good because I cooked all day." You complain, reaching for a slice of pizza. 

"Wow I didn't know you worked at Pizza Hut," he says teasingly. 

Placing your hand over your heart dramatically, "It's truly a tiring task." 

"I bet it is. Thank you for throwing me a party and 'cooking' for me," Mashiho says then he learns over places a kiss on your cheek. 

🦁 Jaehyuk

"Did you get my present yet." Jaehyuk pestered again.

He's been on about his present for the past 2 weeks now. The questions on whether said present had been purchased came in all forms. It started very light with the usual 'My birthday is coming up. Not that I need a gift, but here is my list'. Then that progressed to him sending you links of the things he found interesting on G-Mart. Now he's just blatantly asking. Little did he know you had a gift, but maybe not what he was expecting. 

"I'm not telling you." 

Jaehyuk stops his feet like a baby, "Why not? Tell me." 

You hold your group, "No. Stop acting like a baby." 

"Did you get me something from my list?" He is still pestering on. I mean you get it it's his birthday, but who knew he was this impatient. You're just about to crack around lunchtime, but then you're able to drag him to the restaurant where the boys are waiting. 

"Jae just sit down," you say once you're at the table. He is about to say something again and you're over it. 

"Oh, why are you in the dog house?" Hyunsuk teases Jaehyuk. 

Pouting he says, "I may have been a little annoying today." 

"Annoying is an understatement. This is your present, a party, and dinner with our friends." 

Jaehyuk looks remorseful for all the nagging today, "I'm sorry love. I won't do it again." He gives you a side hug. It's sweet so you smile and place a kiss on his head. The other boys around the table fake gag.

🤖 Asahi

For the past few weeks, the only thoughts that have been flowing through your mind are those of a party. Coming up with ideas for your boyfriend is difficult. Asahi is a homebody which means he would probably prefer to have the party at home. Which also means you have to somehow find time to sneak in a birthday cake. The task doesn't seem that hard, but Asahi is a light sleeper. The only chance you have to sneak in the cake is when he is napping. Which is how you ended up in this situation. 

The plan was simple. You give the sign aka text Jaehyuk and Yoshi. Then they leave the cake outside. You retrieve the cake and celebrate. Mission accomplished. 

That's not how it went at all. 

First problem. The cake. 

Jaehyuk

Okay don't yell at us

But we have a… situation

You

What?

Jaehyuk

You see umh...

Yoshi dropped the cake!

You 

Please tell me you're kidding 

Long story short. He wasn't, the cake was now gone. It isn't a birthday surprise without cake so you ordered the two idiots to go get a new one. You are lucky that Asahi was up all night writing a song. 

The second problem was the new cake. 

After Yoshi and Jaehyuk brought up the new cake. It was safely in the apartment now. Everything was back on track. Then you looked at the cake. 

In bright bold red frosting 'Happy Graduation' was written across the middle. In the midst of grabbing out your phone to send a very angry text to the two culprits. You fail to notice Asahi waking up. Only realizing this when he's leaning over your shoulder reading the cake himself. 

"Who is graduating?" 

You jump obviously terrified. When did he wake up? 

This made the 3rd problem. He was awake, granted confused, but still awake. 

"It was supposed to say happy birthday, but my two minions dropped the first cake. Then when they 'fixed' it they got this cake with Happy graduation on it." 

He hums at the explanation, "Your plan failed?" 

"Horribly. Anyways Happy Birthday." 

Asahi says thank you and then grabs a spoon dipping right into the 'g' in graduation taking a bite. 

"Hey, at least the cake is still good." 

🦊 Yedam

"Stop thanking me. It's your birthday we are supposed to celebrate." 

Yedam still looks conflicted, "This must have taken a lot of time out

of your day. I didn't need anything special." 

"Doesn't mean you don't deserve it," you rebut, "Plus this didn't take up too much of my time. You spoiled me on my birthday, it's only fair." 

 "How did you even find this place?" He asks looking around at all the flowers in the field. 

You think for a little bit, you've been planning this for a long time, "Saw it on Instagram last year. I've been wanting to come here for a while." 

"A year? You waited for a long time." 

"I wanted to make this day special for you." 

Yedam grabs your hand, "This is the best birthday I have ever had." 

🐰 Doyoung

"Here," you say, handing an envelope to Doyoung. 

He takes a glance at the card, "What is this for?" 

"It's the present I got you." 

Doyoung tears open the envelope taking out the card. He reads over the card and smiles. 

"You planned all of this for tonight?" Doyoung questions. 

You nod smiling back at him, "Yeah. I thought this would be the best gift for you. School takes up most of our time and you deserve to relax." 

"That's so sweet," Doyoung says. Then you're pulled into a tight hug, "Thank you." 

"You don't have to thank me. Just enjoy your party. It took me a long time to plan it." 

"Anything you have planned will be amazing." 

🐏 Haruto

"Cancel all your plans for Saturday." You say. 

"Why?" Haruto asks. 

"I made plans for us. It's for your birthday." You respond. Haruto usually isn't the type to push for information so getting him to agree shouldn't be that hard.

"That's sweet, but I don't really need anything."  

"But you deserve this. Plus this is our first birthday as a couple. It has to be special." You inquired. 

Haruto still isn't convinced he needs anything however, "I really don't need much. Just a simple happy birthday will make me happy." 

"Aww, that's sweet babe" you coo. He's so humble, "but still cancel your plans. I spent a lot of time making plans. If you miss it, it'll have been a waste of my time." 

"What did you plan?" 

You shrug, gotta be careful not to give out much detail, "Just something that I know we will both enjoy." 

Haruto half-smiles at the response, "Okay, it's not like I had plans in the first place." 

🐺 Jeongwoo

"I don't want to get up," Jeongwoo grumbles snuggling into his blanket. 

"We have to go. Get changed!" You yell yanking the blanket off of him. Who knew it would be this hard to get him up from bed. "If you don't get up right now I'm calling your mom." With that threat, he is at least sitting up from the couch. 

"Do I have to dress up?" 

"No, but stop looking like a kicked puppy." 

After Jeongwoo got ready to leave. You both make your way down to a room cafe. Of course, as you got closer he kept claiming that he knew what you were up too. Yet when you called his bluff and asked he just said 'I'll know for sure when we get there'. When you reach the cafe both of you make your back to the booked room. When you open the door the staff already have the cake placed with a candle. 

"I knew it!" 

"Oh shut up you had no idea!" 

Later on, throughout the night he is still grumbling about knowing you had this all planned. (He gets cake shoved in his face around the third time he grumbled.)

🐮 Junghwan

"Sweety, can you place the candles on the cake?" 

"Yes ma'am." 

"Awe you don't have to call me Mama just call me Mrs. So," Junghwan's mom coos. 

"Okay," you say a very small smile and blush take over your cheeks, "Will he be back soon?" 

Mrs. So nods, "He should be walking through that door complaining of being hungry soon." 

Sure enough, a few minutes later Junghwan is treading through the door. As his mom predicted he is talking about being hungry. He throws his bag on the couch and makes his way to the kitchen. When he gets to the kitchen both Mrs. So and you yell 'Happy Birthday'. You go for the cake holding it up. Mrs. So lights the candle. 

"Make a wish," you remind him before he blows out the candle. 

"I wish for everyone I know to be safe and live a long and happy life," he wishes then blows out the candles. 

Mrs. So smiles at his wish praising her sons wish, "So thoughtful." 

You place the cake back down on the table. Then reach for the present you got Junghwan. "Here you go I hope you like it." 

"Thank you. Did you help my mom plan this?" He questions. 

"She was the one who had the idea," Mrs. So gushes, "You got a good one." 

Simultaneously you both blush. Junghwan lets out a very embarrassed, 'Mom'.

--

Thank you so much for reading!

Requested by Anon.

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