#i’ve been a bad boy! // balthazar
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Something I’m curious about:
You know the scene in DM3 when Balthazar says “I’ve been a bad boy” and the repeats it in French?
Well, in that scene, what does he say for the French translation? Does he say it in English? Repeats it in French? Says it in an entirely different language?
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about the fic:
This takes place somewhere around season 6. I haven't written a lot of fanfics, so I hope you enjoy it. It was supposed to be a destiel fanfiction, but there isn't much destiel in it, it's just mostly a re-write for those episodes in season 6. But there is some destiel in the last two chapters and a bit in between. This fanfiction is finished and if I think about it I will post every week. Also, I couldn't come up with a good title, so if anyone thinks he has a better title please let me know !!
summary:
Cas is trying to hide his deal with Crowley. Unfortunately Sam, Bobby and Dean are suspicious. And now that Lisa and Ben are kidnapped, things are getting worse.
Chapter 1: The betrayal
It had been two days now since Lisa and Ben were kidnapped and there was still not any progress. No demon wanted to answer them, which had left the boys with a crapload of dead bodies and a few confused people after they’d exorcised them. Dean was worried sick and trying to get answers from the demons at the same time, while Sam, Bobby and Cas were trying to find the person who knew how to open Purgatory. Or well actually just Sam and Bobby. Cas was mostly trying to hide his deal with Crowley and stopping Crowley from ripping their hearts out. They had been reading for three hours when Sam found something. ‘Here, I think I’ve found something.’ The two men looked up. ‘Samuel’s diary mentions someone trying a spell. He thought they wanted to open Purgatory.’ ‘Did it work ?’ Cas asked. ‘He doesn’t know for sure, but all those men died the next five years. So I guess that the thing they let out wasn’t too happy about it.’
That night Cas flew to Crowley’s place. ‘Ah, you have something ?’ ‘Yes. We’ve found someone that escaped from Purgatory. We just need to locate it now. I’ll inform you when we have it.’ When he was at Bobby’s again he looked at Dean. The young man lay peacefully asleep on the couch. Cas felt bad. He wished he didn’t have to do this. The angel wanted to sit down when he heard voices coming from the kitchen.
‘I don’t know, Bobby. I mean it’s Cas.’ ‘I know, boy. But you know it as well as I do. He is hiding something and I don’t like it.’ Cas made himself invisible and sneaked to the kitchen. ‘I mean why else is Crowley still alive ?’ said Bobby. ‘He’s an angel. I’m sure he wouldn’t have made such a mistake. Look, I don’t like it either, Sam. But we have to consider that he’s working with Crowley.’ ‘Yeah, yeah, I know. I just… don’t like it. But he is still our friend, Bobby. He’s still Cas. And I know that if Dean was awake that he would’ve said the same thing.’
If Cas had heard Sam’s last words he may have reconsidered the whole plan. But he had already left after Bobby said that they had to consider that he was working with Crowley. Cas had heard enough. It was clear that they didn’t trust him. He would explain all of it later, when it was over. The angel thought of Heaven. It had always been so peaceful, so quiet up there. He especially thought of the Heaven of the autistic man who drowned in his bathtub in 1953. It was just a garden, but there were, to his great pleasure, bees. Cas loved bees. They didn’t have them in the Gardens. Neither were they mentioned in any of the books in the Library. He didn’t exactly know why he liked them, he just did. They were so fuzzy and busy and always working. If Cas hadn’t been so full of thoughts, he might have noticed the angelic presence in and around the house. But when he felt it, it was already too late. The angel quickly turned around, too late to avoid the blow. For a brief moment Cas thought he could see Balthazar, but then he blacked out.
He smelled something weird. He couldn’t quite place it, but it was something familiar. The angel tried to open his eyes, but they refused. He tried it again and this time they worked. The first thing he saw was fire. That was the smell !! Cas got up and looked around. Bobby, Sam, Balthazar and Dean stood outside the circle of holy fire. Everyone had a serious look on their face, but Dean also had another expression. Cas first couldn’t figure out what it was, but he knew the second that Dean spoke. ‘Cas.’ His voice was soft, but also full of pain. The pain someone has when they are betrayed. Especially when it’s their best friend. ‘Cas, look at me.’ At first Cas didn’t look at him, but he braced himself and looked into his best friend’s eyes. ‘Do you work with Crowley? Are you trying to find Purgatory together?’ Cas didn’t answer. ‘Tell me! Please, tell me you’re not working with him.’ ‘Dean..’ Dean was so desperate. He truly wanted to believe that Cas wasn’t working with the King of Hell, that he could still trust him, that the others were lying. But deep down he knew what his friend was going to answer. Cas looked down, but said quietly: ‘Yes.’
The looks on everyone’s faces were different. Sam and Dean both looked betrayed and not wanting to believe it, while Balthazar and Bobby looked betrayed, but also like they had known it deep down the whole time. ‘Please, just let me explain-’ Cas tried. But Sam said: ‘Why, Cas ? If someone has a problem we share it. We solve it. Together. We don’t just make deals with demons.’
End notes:
Okay, so this was the first chapter. I hope you enjoyed it and I will post every Saturday, except when I'm on vacation. It has eight chapters total. Have a good day everyone !!
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Finally finished season 6!!!! It was good!! Not sure what all the hate is about (I’ve seen people say they don’t like it). Maybe I just have bad taste idk, but I loved it. Episode 15 where they’re Jared and Jensen made me die laughing I swear. Misha tweeting throughout the episode was EVERYTHING to me. He was amazing.
Also, with the way Rufus is talked about in the fandom I thought he lived WAY longer than this season!! When Bobby stabbed him I was sure he was gonna survive. I was wrong. Balthazar too!! Is he dead dead though??! They didn’t show his wings so idk I’m still iffy on that… but the light… whatever, I’ll see eventually.
One of my fav things from this season is right after Sam gets his soul back, you an just see Deans face saying “yeah, my brothers back 😌❤️” and I think that’s beautiful.
My fav Soulless Sam moment was when Samuel tells the boys “you can either put a bullet in your grandfather or let me go” or something along those lines and Sam just PULLS OUT HIS GUN AND AIMS IT AT HIS HEAD. That was so hot.
ACTUALLY I LIED!! My fav Soulless Sam moment was when he fucking bit himself till he bled so that he could use his blood for the demon circle thing. When he smiled with his mouth all bloody?! FUCK. YES. BITCH. UUGGHHH.
The make out between Meg and Castiel made me feel something. Like their chemistry is insaneeee. I need them to hate fuck IMMEDIATELY.
I liked Soulless Sam chasing Bobby through his house when he was trying kill him, I feel like that could have been a whole episode of Sam just going bat shit crazy because he doesn’t want his soul back. Opportunity missed.
The consent issues regarding Sam’s soul is something that should be talked about more I feel like. Him screaming for Dean before he gets his soul back broke me tbh.
Rachel popping off on the boys because they only called Cas when they needed him was everything. A bad bitch.
I love love LOVE how Crowley went from helping them last season to full on becoming the main villain for this season. He’s the only villain that sees the brothers as an actual threat and I love how he knows that with them alive, he’s always going to be in danger.
Cas is terrifying as God, I hope he doesn’t do anything fucking STUPID next season. He already broke the wall in Sams mind (fuck him for that, bitch), I’m scared of what’s gonna happen next.
I’ve only watched up to season 5 of Supernatural and I had to stop because my heart literally couldn’t take it anymore. I don’t even know when I’m going to start back up again but for now I just need to take a break.
#supernatural#dean winchester#sam winchester#supernatural season 6#castiel#soulless sam#the winchester brothers
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tag drop
#thirst for blood is a difficult urge to satisfy // coin#be the good guys // monty#enlightenment comes from within // tahani#stop being mean to my best friend // nonnie#you’re not the hero. you’re the villain // christian#i have an insatiable need to win // bob#if you are not trying told hold on to time you are not so afraid of losing it // luxa#he was never mine to lose // eponine#he will never part from those three little kittens that changed his heart // gru#i’ve been a bad boy! // balthazar#a princess with the strength of a warrior // claude#it’s just butter. that’s culinary school in three words // michelle#secretly badass secretary // mónica#thy honesty and love doth mince this matter // othello#strangle her in bed; even the bed she hath contaminated // iago
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Life As We Know It {Chapter 17}
Summary: After the sudden deaths of Nesta’s sister and Cassian’s best friend, they gain guardianship of their nephew, Nyx.
Based on Life As We Know It (2010) and a prompt sent in by anonymous for our Nessian fanfic contest. This is a modern au.
Instead of doing a tag list for this story, we have decided to have a set posting schedule. Chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays. Occasional surprise chapters could be posted at miscellaneous times. Chapters will be posted on both my and Tara’s blogs! >> @tacmc.
Life As We Know It Masterlist
Shelby’s Masterlist
Tara’s Masterlist
It had been a long day.
They hadn’t done jack shit, but a long day nonetheless, thanks to the run in with Tomas.
After eating lunch, Cassian had taken Nyx out to the pool, letting him float around in his little inner tube and splash in the water. He kept a close eye on him and he wasn’t sure he’d heard so many giggles from the little dude in months.
Not even fifteen minutes after they’d come out, Nesta decided to join them, though it wasn’t to play and splash like Nyx. No, she brought a book hat, and tanning oil, but Nyx squealed his delight when he saw her regardless.
After some goading and thinly veiled threats to splash her smutty book if she didn’t get in, Nesta relented and Nyx had the time of his life.
Until he got chlorine in his eye and had a meltdown.
Just like that, pool time was over, and after taking him inside and getting changed, Cassian was lounging on the couch while Nyx played on the floor.
Nesta started up the stairs and said, “I think I’m going to take a bath. Relax from…earlier.”
From that piece of shit Tomas and the things he’d said. Cassian wished he’d of at least said something, but he most wished he’d have throttled him.
Cassian simply nodded and Nesta was off, hurrying up the stairs and shimmying out of her bikini once she closed herself inside of the master bathroom.
She hadn’t been in the warm water with her eyes closed for five minutes before a horrid sound came from downstairs.
One word screamed at the top of Cassian’s lungs, her name.
“NESTA!”
For a moment, she thought she had imagined it. But, then he screamed again.
“NESTA!”
She shot up in the tub and was about to yell back, when she heard, “COME QUICK!”
Panic rose in the pit of her stomach as she jumped out of the tub and wrapped a towel around her wet body as she threw open the bathroom door. “I’m coming! I’m coming! What happened?! What’s wrong?!”
“Come on, come on, come on!” Cassian yelled, but it wasn’t fear in his voice - only excitement. “Hurry, before you miss him!”
Nesta rounded the top of the stairs, and froze. A few feet in front of Cassian, on his own two feet, was Nyx, taking slow, steady steps toward his uncle.
Her feet carried her down the stairs in a flash and she was next to Cassian, on her knees, just like he was. At the appearance of his aunt, he grinned, those angelic cheeks rounding out and reached for her.
And he tumbled down.
“Shit,” Cassian muttered and lifted him back onto his unsteady feet, praying they weren’t about to have more tears. But the dark blue eyes that gazed up at him were not tear-filled, just wide and curious as always.
Taking a few more tentative steps, he reached them, leaning into Cassian, but a hand reaching out to take Nesta’s as he animatedly spoke in his own baby language.
“Good job, bubba,” Nesta cried, hoisting him up into her arms and crushing him in a hug. “Such a big boy.”
Nyx giggled and wiggled to be put down.
He wasn’t done just yet.
His feet hit the ground and he was off. He walked from Nesta to Cassian then back again. Every time he fell down, he got right back up and kept on moving.
“Look at you go, buddy,” Cassian laughed, catching Nyx as he made it to him.
“Think he’ll sleep good tonight?” Nesta asked, watching them both with a smile on her face.
“I hope so,” he chuckled, letting Nyx pat him on the face, grinning up at him.
He meandered back across the room, plopping down at his toys and began playing again.
“And I guess we’re done with that,” he laughed, standing up and shaking his head. “He finally walked.”
“Sixteen months,” she sighed, propping a hip on the side of the couch. “I was starting to think he’d never do it.”
“Me either,” he said, sitting down. He glanced up at her—and froze.
He’d completely forgotten she was wearing nothing but a towel.
“Didn’t we have a rule about coming down here nude?” Cassian asked, under his breath.
Nesta’s eyes darted to his. “Pardon?”
His eyebrows raised and he gestured to her towel, and Nesta looked down, as if she had completely forgotten that she was wearing it, too. “Oh, shit, sorry. I was in such a hurry to come downstairs-.”
“I mean, I don’t blame you-.”
“I could’ve put on something-.”
“I was screaming your name-.”
“Screaming my name,” Nesta repeated, her cheeks heating. Last time Cassian had screamed her name, it had been under very, very different context.
Although, she had been wearing little to nothing then, too.
The memories flashed through her mind, and from the way Cassian was watching her, she assumed that they were flashing through his, too.
She watched as his throat bobbed and his eyes left hers, dragging down her body as if he couldn’t stop himself. He met her gaze again and she felt her cheeks heating. Her cheeks, her ears, her neck, her entire body heated under that gaze.
“I’m going to…” She hooked a thumb over her shoulder, towards the stairs. “Finish my bath, I guess.”
“Right,” Cassian replied, his eyes still on her. “I’ll put him down in just a few minutes.”
She glanced over at the baby as she backed up toward the stairs. Nyx was indeed starting to rub his eyes, and noticing Nesta’s attention on him, he yawned and reached for her.
Before she could cross the room, Cassian was on his feet and picking Nyx up.
“I can take him,” she protested, but he shook his head, not looking at her.
“You go relax. I’ve got him.”
Nesta cleared her throat and nodded, convincing herself to say nothing more as she hurried up the stairs, clinging to her towel.
She settled back into the bath, even though the water had chilled.
She couldn’t control her breathing.
She thought of that time when he’d caught her in the bath before, right after they had moved in, when he caught her doing intimate things with herself, alone.
Then she thought of the immense amount of pleasure that he’d given her, and how nothing and no one had ever compared to it.
Her heart began to beat a little bit faster, and a throbbing formed between her thighs.
She wondered if Cassian ever caught himself thinking about it, if he ever wanted to do it again.
Judging by the look in his eyes downstairs, the intense way he had been watching her…
Nesta pulled herself out of the tub.
She dressed and pulled her hair into a ponytail atop her head, but couldn’t decide if going downstairs would be a good or bad idea. She couldn’t decide if being around him right now was a smart decision, not when the thoughts in her head were so distracting she couldn’t even focus on the laundry she had neglected to fold for a few days.
Her phone vibrated where she’d plugged it in on her nightstand and Balthazar’s name lit up the screen.
That was another reason she couldn’t allow herself to entertain the thoughts constantly running through her head. She and Bal weren’t in a relationship, they were in no way exclusive and hadn’t had that conversation, but Nesta wasn’t the type to date—or in this case, sleep with—two men at once.
She could hear Cassian down in the living room again, no doubt cleaning up Nyx’s toys and settling down with a beer. She wanted to join him, wanted to curl up on the other side if the couch with a glass of wine and listen to him commentate whatever stupid show or game he was watching.
But she knew that wasn’t a good idea.
So she laid down on her bed, grabbed the book from her nightstand, and read until all of those emotions that Cassian made her feel faded into the back of her mind where she told them to stay.
*
The next morning, Cassian was on Nyx duty. Since he had the day off, the nanny didn’t have to come, which meant bro time.
First, they went for a jog along the Sidra where both Nyx and Cassian got their fair share of looks from the ladies. Turns out a cute kid was a great way to gain the attention of beautiful women.
On the way back home, Cassian decided to make a detour for some lunch, and ended up pushing the jogging stroller right into Nesta’s restaurant.
He knew where it was, and knew that Nesta was a damn good cook, but somehow, he hadn’t visited the restaurant in the over four months they’d been living together.
It was packed, to absolutely no surprise and when he walked in, he was greeted by an amazing array of delicious smells. Quickly realizing the stroller was going to be a hindrance, he parked it in the corner by the door and held Nyx as he made his way into one of the sitting areas.
“It’s open seating, so please, sit where you like.”
Cassian turned as a deep voice spoke from behind him. The man was watching him, and when he turned, his eyes fell on Nyx. Recognition lit them up for a moment, Nesta having brought Nyx into the restaurant more than once.
“Thanks. Is Nesta free?”
“Last I saw, she was helping out in the kitchen, but I’ll check. Take a seat and I’ll be back.”
Cassian nodded and the man was gone, disappearing through a swinging door to the back.
Indeed, Nesta was manning the grill, an assortment of sandwiches, meats, pancakes and other items sizzling around her. She was reading order tickets and communicating with her line cooks, and everything was exactly as it should be.
Until Helion was leaning on the wall next to her.
She groaned. “Tell me it’s not the lady who claims to find a hair in her food every time she’s here.”
The patron in question was in the dining room, a brunch buffet spread out before her and her friends. Her curly, red hair was piled on top of her head and without fail, she always seemed to find a lone, red, curling hair in her dishes, no matter what she ate and who was in the kitchen. Even though Nesta had no one in her employment with curly, red hair.
“Oh, no,” Helion said, his smirk growing. “There’s a handsome man out front asking for you.”
Balthazar.
Nesta groaned. Even though she didn’t mean to. “Let him know I’m busy, but I’ll be out in just a minute.”
“It’s not him,” he replied, practically singing the words. “This one has a very cute baby with him.”
She was moving before he’d finished speaking, hollering at one of her cooks to take up her place on the line.
When she went into the dining room, Cassian was sitting in a booth, Nyx in a high chair at the end of the table next to him.
“What a pleasant surprise,” Nesta crooned as she approached.
Nyx’s head whipped around at the familiar voice as Cassian looked up from his menu. Nesta was lifting Nyx out of the high chair when Cassian said, “We were out and about. Someone was hungry.”
Nesta chuckled. “Was that someone you or the baby?”
“Fine,” Cassian said, grinning. “Two someones were hungry.”
Nesta snorted as she kissed Nyx’s cheek. “Couldn't have cleaned up before coming in here?” She asked, nodding to Cassian’s damp t-shirt.
He shrugged his shoulder. “This was on the way home. You should be glad we graced you with our presence.”
“Right,” she laughed softly, sitting Nyx back in the high chair and buckling him in. “Any idea what you want?”
He was flipping through the menu, and honestly, every damn thing he saw looked delicious. He smiled up at her. “Surprise us. I can’t choose.”
Smirking, she took his menu and said, “Chicken livers and brussel sprouts, coming right up.”
He rolled his eyes as she walked away, but she entered their order into the system and returned to the table, sitting down in the empty booth seat across from him.
“He have a good morning?” She asked, holding Nyx’s outstretched hand and letting him grip her thumb. He shook her hand as hard as he could and grinned up at her, babbling excitedly.
“Aside from the blow out he had this morning, I’d say so. Which he found very amusing that I had to clean up” Cassian chuckled, rolling his eyes. “This is the only kid who laughs while he’s covered in shit, I swear.”
Nesta shook her head, laughing softly.
Cassian took the chance to look around. “This place is great, Nes. The only thing it’s missing is a bar.”
Nesta looked around with him and nodded. “I’ve thought about it quite a bit. Don’t wanna mess with licensing. I’ve already got too much on my plate around here.”
Cassian cocked his head to the side. “You just gotta get someone to run the bar, that’s all. You don’t have to do everything on your own, you know.”
Nesta looked back to Cassian. “Someone like you?”
“Handsome, smart, with a high knowledge of what it takes to run a bar?” He asked. “Yeah, someone like me.”
She narrowed her eyes and nudged his shin with the toe of her shoe. “Don’t get too cocky. If you decide to leave your bar and want a new project… Sure, I’ll add a bar.”
Cassian blinked. “I can’t tell if you’re messing with me or not.”
Nesta shook her head. “I’m always serious.”
“At one time, I thought that was true,” Cassian muttered.
His shin got another nudge.
“I’m serious,” she repeated, with a quiet laugh. “Shockingly enough, you’d be one of the few people I trust to let into my management.”
He stayed quiet for a minute, long enough that she glanced at him from where she’d been looking at Nyx. He was chewing on his bottom lip and she had to physically restrain herself from reaching over and working it out from between his teeth. Feeling her attention on him, he looked at her, and said, “We’ll talk about it more at home, yeah?”
Nodding, Nesta replied, “Of course. But don’t just do it because I said something, I don’t want-.”
“I’ve actually been thinking about opening my own place for while,” he murmured, and then quickly added, “Not that this would be my place, it’s yours, of course. But I’ve got savings. I can help with any applications and licensing and renovations that need to be done. Not to mention, it would be an investment in a growing business. That always looks good in a portfolio.”
Nesta smiled. “Like you said, we’ll talk about it at home. I’m gonna go check on your food.”
“Please do,” Cassian said, waving her away. “I’m starving.”
With a roll of her eyes, she stood up and walked toward the kitchen, shoving Cassian’s sweaty head as she walked by him.
Helion was waiting by the kitchen doors. “Flirting, how cute. It’s like watching two horny teenagers.”
“Fuck off,” Nesta muttered.
Helion only grinned and followed her into the kitchen. “Admit it. You’ve got the hots for hot uncle.”
“I can fire you, you know,” Nesta said.
“You wouldn’t,” he said, right on her heels. “You’d be bored to death here without me.”
She didn’t need to bother telling him he was right. On either front.
*
Nesta was beat by the time she got off. It was an effort of will to make it home before she fell asleep, but as she parked her car in the driveway, she nearly sighed in relief. Cassian had said he’d handle dinner, so she knew that a glass of wine—and hopefully, an uninterrupted bath—was in her future.
She hadn’t expected to find Cassian on his hands and knees as soon as she came in the door.
He looked up at her, eyes wide and said, “Uh, hey. You’re home.”
“I am,” she replied, chuckling. “What are you doing?”
He hesitated before saying, “Playing hide and seek with Nyx.”
Nesta blinked. “Hide and-? Cassian, he’s one.”
“I left him on the floor with his toys and I went into the kitchen for thirty seconds to check on dinner,” he said, standing up.
She waited for him to go on, not understanding. And then her eyes widened. “You lost him?”
“He’s not lost,” he said, holding his hands up. “We’re playing hide and seek.”
“Cassian-.”
“He’s one, Nesta, he couldn’t have gone far-.”
“He walks now!” She cried, tossing her purse on the bench by the door and hurrying into the living room.
A giggle sounded from the other room, and they both sped around the corner where Nyx had made himself perfectly happy.
In the laundry room, Nyx sat in a pile of Nesta’s laundry, waving her underwear in the air.
As Nesta let out a relieved breath, Cassian chuckled. “Atta boy.”
Nesta whacked Cassian on the shoulder before picking Nyx up and freeing her panties from his grasp.
He immediately started crying.
“Way to take his toy away,” Cassian muttered.
Nesta shot him a look.
Cassian shrugged. “I would’ve cried, too.”
Nesta tried her best not to laugh, but failed. “You’re ridiculous.”
Cassian opened his mouth to reply, but the smoke alarm near the kitchen began to blare.
Nyx’s cries got louder and Nesta stopped Cassian, giving Nyx to him and hurried into the kitchen, pulling a pan of burnt French fries out of the oven and opened the back door and the door leading to the garage. She got a kitchen towel and was waving the smoky air away from the smoke alarm, and after a minute or two, the incessant blaring ceased.
Leaning back against the counter, she took a deep breath and looked at the doorway, finding Cassian standing there, Nyx still in his arms, though the tears had stopped. He was cringing, expecting her to start yelling any moment—.
But Nesta took one look at the charred French fries and started laughing. Deep, belly laughs that made her stomach hurt so badly she doubled over.
Cassian turned to the living room, getting Nyx set up in his playpen, and walked back into the kitchen, where Nesta was still laughing with her hands on her knees, trying to get air down.
“You find something funny, Archeron?” He asked, pausing in front of her. Even he was unable to stop the small smile on his face.
“French fries?” she asked, unable to catch her breath. “You— You burnt frozen french fries? How long have they been in there? Two hours?”
Cassian looked behind him at the clock on the stove and rubbed the back of his neck. “I like them crispy.”
“Oh, they’re crispy,” Nesta promised, straightening her back, small bouts of laughter still finding their way out. “They’re really damn crispy.”
“Shut up,” he muttered, shaking his head. He pulled a series of paper towels off the stovetop and revealed a tray of chicken nuggets and a pot of cooked broccoli. “At least I didn’t burn everything.”
“Chicken nuggets and broccoli?” she asked, her grin still wide. “Kids barely old enough to eat solids and we’re already having kid dinners?”
“Kid dinners?” Cassian repeated. “You’re lying your ass off if you’re telling me that you don’t enjoy a big ass plate of chicken nuggets.”
Nesta laughed, shaking her head. “They’re dinosaur shaped!”
“The dino ones taste better!” Cassian protested.
“We’ll see about that,” Nesta said, and just as she looked up at Cassian, she realized how close he’d stopped from her.
He couldn’t have been more than a foot away, but he felt much closer.
Nesta’s laughter died down, although that light feeling in the pit of her stomach remained.
One of his hands was braced on the counter she leaned on, and though he wasn’t caging her in, she couldn’t help but stare up at him.
“At least it’s not breakfast again,” she murmured, noting the way he was staring at her, too.
“You’ve never complained about my breakfast,” he said, swallowing roughly.
She tracked the way his Adam’s Apple bobbed. “Well, you’ve never burnt it, so.”
The corner of his mouth twitched and she knew he was trying his hardest not to smile. He opened his mouth to reply, but Nyx started talking from the other room, babbling and nonsense and baby language reaching them.
Cassian seemed to realize how close he stood to her and backed up a step, clearing his throat. “If you want to grab him, I’ll put some fresh fries in the oven.”
Nodding, Nesta said, “Yeah, of course.”
“I’m making them crispy, though,” he said, as she left.
Nesta snorted as she shook her head and lifted Nyx out of his pack n play. “Your uncle is nuts. Yes, he is.”
Nyx’s grin melted Nesta’s heart.
Forty minutes later, once the french fries were sufficiently crispy, the three of them were sitting at the table, eating dinner. Nesta didn’t mind it, not one bit, the fact that they sat there every night and ate together.
It was almost as if they were a family.
An odd, dysfunctional, interestingly beautiful family.
#snacmc lawki#snacmc collabs#life as we know it#lawki#snelbz tacmc collab#nessian#nesta archeron#cassian#acotar#acomaf#acowar#acofas#acosf
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Chaotic Coupling
*FINALLY! This f**king request took so f**king long! It matter not now because I finally finished it. It is also really long so hopefully that helps make up for how long it took. I do not mean it lightly when I say it is long. This took up 14 pages in google drive. You have been warned.*
Prompt: Reader is the goddess of chaos exiled to the Underworld. It is plenty boring but then she meets the recently deceased Peter Pan. He seems like he could be fun!
Requested by: anon
Warnings: language
~~~
What is more sweet than chaos? What is more freeing then giving into desire? What is a life if one does not indulge in their sins?
Boring. Tedious. Peaceful.
Not at all fun.
Y/N was a goddess of chaos. Messing with mortals by causing trouble and anarchy wherever she went. It was chaotic and threw mortals into a hysteria but that was not how Y/N saw it. Oh no. When she looked down and saw what her actions had wrought she only saw beauty. The anger, confusion, sadness, and raw untethered emotion bursting from every lifeform like a volcano. She loved it.
Unfortunately the other gods did not. She was warned hundreds of times to stop causing such blatant and unneeded mess around the globe but she never listened. It was not like the gods ever punished her. The world would always need a little chaos. Trying to contain it would only build it up until it was unleashed like a hellstorm causing much more damage than she ever could by herself. She almost wanted them to detain her just so she could see what her release of chaotic energy would do to the world.
That was not what happened. After centuries of warnings the gods did finally punish her. She was not put in a crate like a pup as she had almost secretly hoped. The gods were smarter than that. Instead she was put on a leash. Banished to the Underworld to help her Uncle Hades. Her presence would still be felt throughout the world but she could not incite anything truly chaotic as long as she was regulated to the Underworld.
At first she tried to keep her head up. Though she had never visited the Underworld she had to believe it would be fun. It was where all dead souls went. Good and bad. They may be dead but that didn’t mean they were free from chaos.
As she soon learned though nothing she did made much of a difference in the Underworld. Her Uncle Hades ran a tight ship so she could never get away with anything too bad. How could this punishment get anymore boring? She was practically debasing herself with these petty squabbles among the dead. It was humiliating and it was boring! What she would give to be able to leave but so long as she was under Hades watchful eye there was no escape.
It was another miserable day in what was essentially hell. Y/N was taking a walk along the street of the town Hades had modeled the Underworld to. All of the sudden a new soul materialized in the center of the square. That was nothing new. New souls appeared all the time. There was something kind of off about this one though. They had an energy about them that practically made her mouth water. Who exactly had died?
She made her way over to them. “Hello there,” She said and the soul turned sharp on his heel. It was a boy. Young. Disheveled brown hair and piercing green eyes blown wide like a cornered lion. “You have some bite don’t you?”
“Who are you?” He snarled.
“I’m Y/N. Goddess of Chaos and unwilling permanent tenant here in the Underworld.” She stalked around him assessing him up and down. “And you are?” She reached a hand out to touch him. He grabbed her by the wrist halting her. He pulled her closer his eyes hard like stones and his words dripping with malice
“Don’t touch me,” He growled.
Y/N chuckled. “You are fun.” She inhaled deeply, “You absolutely reek of it.”
“What?”
“My beautiful chaos. It’s been so long since I’ve caught a whiff of such potent mayhem. Far more intoxicating than any wine.”
“Get away from me,” The boy shoved her off, “Insane woman.”
“You would be insane too if you were stuck here for centuries unable to have any real fun.” She followed after him, unperturbed. “Well I guess you are now.”
“Why are you following me?”
“I’m bored. Duh. Also, I still haven’t learned your name my delicious little anarchist morsel.”
“Stop talking to me like that. My name is Peter Pan.”
“Hm,”
“What now?”
“Such a boring name for someone who absolutely reeks of pandemonium. Care if I call you something more interesting? Like Balthazar or Zebulon.”
“No.”
“No fun.”
That seemed to irk him and he reared on her with a fury. “You do not know who you are talking to. I have fun more than anyone. The world is my board and everyone else in it are pawns.”
“Really? Cause you seem straight boring now. Peter Pan. Blech, and here I had such high hopes for you.”
“Oh woe is you. So sorry to disappoint Your goddess-ness. Unless you can get me out of here then I have no use for you.”
“If I can’t get out of here then there’s no chance you can. If you decide you want to stop being such a stick in the mud come find me. I live in the clocktower.” With that she walked away. Such a shame. She had gotten her hopes up for a minute just for him to let her down. She wondered what he had done in his life that made him smell so delicious though. Oh wait! She could!
She entered the library and went to the secret section in the back. No one could enter here except for gods. Millions of books lined the shelves. The life stories of everyone that had ever lived. “Peter Pan.” She said his name and waited as a book levitated off of one of the many shelves and flew into her hands. “Let’s see what is so interesting about this Peter fellow.”
Lots of reading later and Y/N understood better exactly who she was dealing with. This Peter Pan was a lot like her. Living on his own island doing whatever it was that he wanted. Instigating violence and anarchy in the name of fun. He was also far older than he appeared. Since time stood still on his island, his Neverland, he lived for hundreds of years without growing older. How had she missed such a place? It sounded like somewhere she would have thrived.
It was almost eerie how similar the two were. At least in the context of his book. The real thing seemed a lot more boring. Perhaps that was due to him dying. Death just took the life out of everyone. Metaphorically speaking.
A few days went by of Y/N stalking Peter to see what he would do. After reading through his novel she was sure he’d be one of those that roughed it in the wilderness but to her surprise he took up residence in a secondhand shop. Why there?
Curiosity overtook her and she went inside the shop. Pretty little trinkets long ago lost lined the shelves and glass cases. Something stood out to her amongst all the sparkly treasures. A doll. A simple straw doll with a little blue coat on it. It stood proudly on a pedestal all by itself. What was so precious about this?
She took the doll off the pedestal to inspect it further.
“Drop it.” A cold voice demanded. There was Peter Pan behind one of the cases. His eyes narrowed at her.
“What? This?” She waved the doll, “If you don’t want people touching it you should really put it somewhere more secure than a pedestal in the middle of the room.”
“I said, drop it.” Peter urged again. Y/N didn’t miss the hint of panic in his voice.
“What if I don’t want to?” She produced a flame from her finger, “What if I burnt it to a crisp instead? It’s awfully dry. It’ll be ash in seconds.”
“Put it down!” Peter roared, he had jumped the case and in a split second had a dagger pressed to her throat. “Now!”
“Why is this so special to you?” She asked. He pressed the blade closer to her neck, not saying a word. Something clicked in Y/N’s head right then. A mention of a doll in Peter’s book. A smile creeped back onto her face.
“It’s your doll. The only toy and the only friend you ever had until you came to Neverland.” She extinguished the flame on her finger. “How sentimental.”
“How did--how did you--”
“I know everything now, Peter Pan.” A shadow passed over his face, “And I mean everything. The mother that never wanted you, the orphanage, the fairy that guarded you, your attempts to go back and have a real family failing year after year until you decided you were too old to be anyone’s son again--”
“AGH!” He slashed her throat but not a mark was left on her skin. Not a drop of blood.
“Now that was rude,” Y/N rolled her eyes, “I think I’m owed an apology.”
“But how did…” Peter stared at the dagger.
“Seems you need a reminder.” Y/N took him by the throat. The doll and dagger clattering to the ground as she hoisted him into the air. “I am a goddess. The Goddess of Chaos. Did you really think it would be that easy to kill me?”
He clawed at her hands but they were like stone around his throat. “Remember this Peter Pan, my body takes an insane amount of power to break. Yours, not so much. So remember your place in this world. You are no leader here. You are no threat. You are my toy and I can throw you away whenever I want. So either be a good toy or I will destroy you.” She dropped him. He collapsed to the ground gasping for breath.
“This was fun,” She knelt down next to him and pulled his chin up to look at her, “I’ll be back to play again.” She left a kiss on his forehead. “Farewell.”
Y/N did not go back to see Peter Pan again for several days. For days she watched him stew in his paranoia. Constantly looking over his shoulder like a frightened deer everywhere he went. He liked games. Y/N knew that much. But it looked like he wasn’t having as much as she was with this latest one. Every so often she would walk by him on the street, acting like she hadn’t noticed but all the while watching him from the corner of her eye. He got so tense when he saw her but never withdrew. He would glare at her until she passed.
It was fun having someone to torture like this again. He still had fight in him.
Then came the morning everything changed. Y/N was walking along the street as she usually did this time of day when she noticed Peter exiting the diner. What luck!
“Good morning!” She sidled up next to him, “Got some breakfast did you?”
He didn’t reply. Just shoved his hands deeper in his pockets and kept walking.
“Oh come now, it’s no fun if you don’t reply.” Y/N said, “If you don’t say anything I’ll just take it as a challenge.”
Nothing.
“Fine.” She sighed, “I just thought you’d like someone to talk to. You don’t talk to anyone around here. I think the only person I’ve seen you talk to is my uncle and that was only once. Don’t you find it boring doing this routine everyday? Don’t you want to try something new? We can have a lot of fun if you would just remove that stick up your ass. What happened to the fun boy full of mayhem that I read about? Did he die when you did? I wouldn’t think death would change a person so drastically. People usually retain their personalities from when they were living into their death but not you. You are more boring than watching grass grow and trust me, there is no grass growing here. You are as boring as watching non-growing grass. Isn’t that sad? I think--”
“SHUT UP!” Peter shoved her hard against the wall of a store. His arm was pressed against her neck pinning her in place. “Leave me alone!”
“Ha!” She laughed, “I told you I could get you to talk.”
“There has got to be a way to kill you.” He muttered.
Y/N smiled. Peter’s arm dug into her neck harder. “Stop smiling.”
“You have fire,” She grinned wider, “I like fire.”
Something clicked in his head. His grip on her easing. She figured that would get his attention. He backed away from her slowly. Y/N turned to a potted bush next to the store window. Peter watched her with a growing sense of interest.
“Don’t you like fire too?” She produced a spark in her hand and flicked it at the flower bush. “One little spark of fire and from that spark it grows. It grows, it spreads, it devours everything in its path leaving behind nothing but torment in its beautiful inferno. It’s the most breathtaking form of destruction I’ve ever come across.”
“You’re kinda crazy aren’t you?” Peter asked, watching as the flower bush was consumed by the flames.
“Perhaps.” she fluttered a hand over the fire making it grow faster. “Being the goddess of chaos kinda does that. I thrive off of disorganization and pandemonium. It would only make too much sense that’s what my mind is like as well. I may be impulsive but that doesn’t make me dumb. You have to find the right nerve to hit to maximize your effect. Groom them with little incidents of mayhem here and there. Then, when the timing is right you hit them where it’ll hurt most and watch the beauty unfold before you. Just like a flame can engulf an entire forest, one perfectly hit nerve can destroy an empire.”
“What do you do when it’s all in ashes then?” Peter asked.
“Not my area. I can bring civilizations down but I’ve never really put much thought into raising new ones up. That’s what the rest of my family is for. They take the ashes of what I have done and create new life. It’s an endless circle of life and death. Gods, I miss it.”
She stared deep into the fire.
“Is that what you’ve been doing with me? Bothering me with little annoyances for days on end before trying to strike that nerve that would drive me insane?”
“A bit.” She shrugged, “Not a fan?”
“Not really, but I guess that’s the point.” He sighed, “I think we’re a lot alike actually.”
“I thought the same thing while I was reading through your book. Did death really suck all the fun out of you?”
“Not much fun to be had here. None of my boys are here, I have magic but there’s nothing for me to control outside of a stupid little shop, and the residents are insanely dull and sad. I fear that you have been my only form of entertainment since I got down here.” Peter waved his hand and the flame from the one flower pot jumped into the next catching that one on fire as well. “What did you mean when you were talking about my book?”
“Oh, there is a portion of the library only accessible to gods. It holds books that contain the entire lives of everyone who has ever lived. I read through yours. That’s how I know everything about you.”
“I see…”
“Would you like to see it?”
“Sure,” He nodded. “Don’t think this means that I like you now or anything. You’re merely the most interesting thing here at the moment.”
“Which is precisely why you do like me.” She elbowed him, “Come, I think you’ll like this place.”
They went to the library and Y/N entered into the area reserved to gods. Peter pouted outside since he couldn’t get past the invisible barrier that shielded him from entering. Y/N grabbed his book and returned with it. “See?”
“Do the gods have these as well?”
“Yes, but they are kept on Olympus. Did you want to read mine?”
“I thought it only fair seeing as how you read my entire life story.”
“Well you would be reading mine for a long time. I do a great many things and I have lived far longer than you have. There’s no need for you to read my book though. Whatever you would like to know you simply have to ask. I have no secrets.”
“Forgive me if I don’t trust anyone who is that open about their past. No secrets? At all?”
“There is nothing I have done in my life that I feel ashamed or embarrassed about.”
“I believe that.” A grin started to spread on his face, an idea latching in his mind, “But that doesn’t mean you don’t have anything personal that you’d rather not share. Acts of wrath and embarrassing moments aren’t something you would feel bad about sharing. Intimate moments though, personal moments, that’s where you clam up.”
“Is this your clever way of trying to dig into my exciting love life?” She smirked. “Afraid I don’t have any secrets there either.”
“Oh no, you misunderstand. I don’t care about any past lovers. I can tell what really gets to you.” Peter stepped closer, “Your family.”
“I don’t care about my family.” Y/N said, she tried to sound casual but his tone gave her pause.
“Yes. You’ve said so. They kicked you out and it is dreadfully boring down in the underworld. But beyond that, you miss them. The only one down here is Hades and I doubt he’s great company. But the other gods and goddess, your other family, even though they banished you here you still yearn to be a part of their world.”
“You don’t know anything.” Y/N’s voice was quiet. She hadn’t expected him to turn the conversation around on her like this.
“I know a lot actually.” Peter continued, “And what I know best is when someone is lost. You may be the Goddess of Chaos but you know what I see? I see the same sadness and desperation that many of my boys wore on my island. You are just a lost little girl crying for your family.”
She hadn’t realized she threw the punch until she saw Peter collapse on the floor. Her breathing was heavy and her hands were shaking. This boy had drilled down into the very core of her being with no effort. He had seen through her as plainly as glass. It was unnerving and she may have reacted a tad harshly to his assessment.
“Punched by a goddess,” Peter stood up again, rubbing at his jaw, “Can honestly say that’s something I hadn’t expected to happen in my life, er, death I guess.”
“You’re not angry?”
“Hardly. Figured you were gonna react like that.” He sighed, “Still not the worst hit I’ve ever taken.”
“You are a strange boy.”
“It’s what keeps me interesting.” He collected the book that had fallen from his hands off the floor.
“Does this mean you still want to kill me?”
“I’m debating it.” He said. “This interaction doesn’t change the fact that you are incredibly annoying.”
“Hurtful but accurate.” Y/N shrugged as she made her way to the stairs that led up to the clocktower. “In another life I think we could have been a very good team.”
She paused. She turned around and saw that Peter had the same look of contemplation. Their eyes met and twin smiles sprouted on their faces. “Is this my magic at work or are we on the same page?” Y/N asked.
“I believe we are.” Peter approached her, “Neither of us wants to be trapped in the Underworld and neither of us individually has the power to escape. But if we work together…”
“We can escape this hellhole.” Y/N finished. “Think you can survive teaming up with me long enough to get out of here?”
“If it means freedom then I will be at your side until we both see the blue sky once again.” He held out a hand, “Partners?”
“Partners.” She shook his hand, “This is going to be so much fun!”
Time passed quickly after Peter and Y/N teamed up to find a way to escape the Underworld. Y/N already had a headstart on research since she spent so much time when she was first banished here finding a way out. She shared her findings with Peter and the two spent days pouring over every detail that looked like it could be useful.
With no need to sleep or eat in the Underworld they would spend several days straight huddled in the library plotting their escape. In between all their research and brainstorming sessions Y/N got to know Peter Pan beyond what she had read in his book and in return he got to know her. They were closer. He still said she was the most annoying thing in all the realms and she teased him often when he got too serious.
When things got especially tense and they needed to blow off steam they would go out together and cause mischief in town. They even snuck into Hades’ office once and stole some of his decanters of fancy liquor. For the first time in a very long time Y/N was truly having fun. Torturing and messing with souls was all well and good but she found she was actually enjoying her time with Peter. She was laughing a lot more with him. Peter himself seemed to grow more at ease with her with every passing day.
Before she had even realized it their begrudging partnership to find a way out of the Underworld had blossomed into friendship. Y/N couldn’t remember the last time she had a friend. She couldn’t remember if she ever did. No one had ever wanted to be very close to her. Causing chaos wherever you go, even unintentionally, threw people off. It never bothered Peter though. He called her annoying but he smiled and laughed at the havoc that naturally happened around her. He played along with it.
“Good morning, Chaos,” Peter let himself into her clocktower bedroom. “Got you a muffin from the diner.” He tossed her a paper bag.
“Thanks.” She caught it. “So, look at this thing I found. So we know that the only way anyone can get out of here is if Hades opens a portal, right? Well, apparently it isn’t solely Hades that can open portals out of the Underworld. Any god can by either being more powerful than Hades like Zeus or by usurping him as the ruler of the Underworld.”
“So you could open a portal out of here?”
“Theoretically yes. But we would have to usurp my uncle.”
“I think we can take him together.”
“No. Here’s the problem. The only way for us to usurp him is to kill him and it is hilariously, nearly impossible, to kill a god.”
“But there is a possibility?”
“I mean I guess but it is hardly a viable option. The only way I know how to kill a god is with the Olympian Crystal which Uncle Hades keeps heavily protected. It is also broken with no way to fix it. Trust me, he brought it out once for me to try and fix but I couldn’t do anything.”
Peter pondered it for a minute. “Okay, you couldn’t fix it all by yourself but what if we tried combining our powers? Do you think that could do it?”
“Maybe. Hades and I tried together once but he said it wouldn’t work since his heart isn’t beating.”
“What does that have to do with--”
“It was part of his own banishment. He can’t leave the Underworld unless his heart starts beating again or something like that. So even though he has the means his dead heart keeps him trapped like us.”
“Alright, is he tied to the crystal in any way? Is there any way he could track it if it went missing?”
“No. So long as it is broken he shouldn’t be able to find it. Why? Plan on stealing it?”
“Yes.”
“Stealing my uncle’s most prized possession from right under his nose, sounds risky...I love it!”
“I thought you would.” Peter grinned, “Seems that for the first time we have a real plan. I say this calls for a celebration.”
“Not too premature?” She asked.
“Well, if we fuck it up then we are both doomed so we might as well celebrate now before anything potentially goes wrong.” He pulled what was left of the liquor they stole from Hades out.
“I won’t object to that.” She took a sip before passing the decanter back to Peter. She stared wistfully out of the clocktower window and sighed. “It’s so strange,” Y/N said, “To be this close to freedom. I have so many memories of the world above but they feel more and more like fantasies I’ve created than something I was ever a part of. I don’t even know what I would do when I get up there. Where would I go?”
“You’re more than welcome to come cause havoc on Neverland if you’d like.” Peter said. “Give my boys a challenge.”
“You really want me on your island? The most annoying being in all the realms?” She teased.
“If you happen to be near at least.” He smiled, softer. “I’d blame it on the liquor but it doesn’t affect us so I guess I’m just gonna have to say this.”
“Say what?”
“I think I am actually gonna miss you when we get out of here.”
“Really?”
“Yes, Chaos.”
“I suppose I’d miss you too.” Y/N shook her head, “I take that back, I know that I’ll miss you.”
“Well that’s enough mushy stuff,” Peter said quickly, dropping his gaze, “We have a crystal to steal after all.”
“Right, of course,” Y/N nodded.
More time passed and Y/N found herself in a new and frightening headspace. She was confused. All her life she had lived through chaos, so much so that it was what she was named the goddess of. Anarchy was where she was most comfortable but yet, when that same pandemonium she thrived in was pushed inward she didn’t know what to do. She could do well in chaos because she always had a focus point. Herself. She was the eye of the storm. She was safe while everything happened around her.
So why did it feel like she was caught in the hurricane?
It had all started that day she and Peter had decided to steal the crystal and usurp Hades. Something about that day disturbed her. When she looked at Peter now her mind wandered. When he sat close enough to touch, her brain burnt out. Yet nothing had changed.
No. That wasn’t entirely true. At some point during all their scheming Y/N had grown to really care about Peter. She’d even call him a friend. When she thought of her life outside of the Underworld she couldn’t think of one where she wasn’t hanging out with him. She already missed him and he wasn’t even gone yet.
What was wrong with her?
Whatever it was it would have to wait. She had a mission now. It was finally the day. After tons of careful and meticulous planning they were going to steal the crystal. Peter was serving as a distraction for Hades while Y/N snuck in and bypassed the traps and wards Hades had around the crystal. She figured she’d have five maybe ten minutes max to get in and get out before Hades got bored of Peter and came back. That’s if she didn’t trip one of his traps first.
By the time she finally got the safe unlocked her whole body was sweating and shaking from nerves. She had come so close and now all she had to do was grab it and get out. She took down the last ward and grabbed the pieces of the crystal and shoved them into her bag before slamming the safe closed and putting the wards back up as quickly as she could.
And done. Phew. Now all she had to do was get out.
“Now this is a surprise.” Y/N froze. Damn. She had taken too long. She poofed the bag away to her room in the clocktower before turning to meet her uncle.
“Hello, hope you don’t mind that I popped in.” She said as casually as she could. “Life up top was getting dreadfully boring.”
“I would say so, it is a rare thing for you to come visit me.” He scanned her up and down, “What entertainment do you think I can provide?”
“I don’t know. You have the billiard table. Care to play?”
“Not now.” He shooed her, “I have work to do so you can scamper along and torment some other poor soul.”
“Boo! You really are the god of the dead.” She stuck her tongue out at him. In the next instant she reappeared in her room. She collapsed back on the bed in relief. Hades didn’t suspect anything.
She heard the sound of pounding footsteps and Peter barged in. “Did you get it?”
Y/N held up the bad with pieces inside. “Who do you take me for?”
“Yes!” Peter was so happy he lifted her off the bed and into the air in a tight hug, “We’re gonna get out of here!”
And the inner turmoil was back. Heat crawled up her neck and burned her face. Had Peter ever held her like this before? Why did it feel so nice to be in his arms?
Just as quick as it started Peter dropped her back to her feet and reached around her for the bag. He pulled out the pieces and set them on the bed, looking over them carefully. He was talking about how it looked like it should be an easy fix but there were other logistics to take into account and whole lot of other technical mumbo jumbo that she really didn’t care about. Well, not so much cared about but couldn’t bring herself to comprehend since her mind was still being tossed around in a tornado of unfamiliar feelings.
“Hey” Peter shook her shoulder, “Were you listening?”
“Spaced out. What were you saying?” She asked.
“I tried a spell on my own but it did nothing. Care to try with me this time like we planned?”
“Got it.” Y/N took her spot next to him and stared down at the broken pieces of crystal. She picked up one and Peter picked up the other. “Here goes nothing.”
They faced each other and started the spell. She was channeling all of her power into it, willing the crystal to come together. This had to work. It just had to. The spell died and when she looked down she frowned at the still broken crystal in her hands.
No. No! It was supposed to work! This was supposed to work! She slid down to the ground, her half of the crystal laying limply in her hands. Peter knelt down with her.
“It didn’t work.” She muttered, “It didn’t work, Peter. We went through all of this and our one way out of here is still just a hunk of junk!”
“We’re never going to see the world above again.” Tears started to slip from her eyes and down her cheeks.
“Don’t say that,” Peter tilted her chin up. His large green eyes bore into her. “We are not giving up now. Not after we have come this far. We are going to see that big blue sky again, Y/N. I swear it.”
“How? We have no other way to get out of here unless we kill Hades and we can’t kill him without this crystal.”
“We’ll find a way. We will not rest until we get out of here. I don’t care how long it takes. Do you wanna know why?” He brushed the tears from her eyes, “Because I want us to go on adventures together. I want to see what you can really do when you can let chaos run free. I want to show you my home. I want you to see Neverland. I want us to have fun together outside of here.”
“Peter…” The whirlwind within me started to ebb, “I want that too.”
“And hey, in the meantime, we can still have fun together right here.” He smiled.
That’s when it hit her. What that chaos reigning inside her really was. Why it felt so strange yet so pleasant at the same time.
“I love you.” She said.
Peter blinked at her. “Huh?”
She grabbed his face and brought him closer so her nose touched his, “I love you, Peter Pan.”
He didn’t respond. Not with words at least. The distance between them, as small as it was, closed and she felt his lips brush against hers in hesitant kiss. She pulled him closer again and the kiss deepened. The spark that ran through her felt like a bolt of lightning and she should know since she had been struck by one of Zeus’ blasts before. This was a lot better though and it certainly didn’t leave a coppery feeling in her mouth.
A flash of light made them break apart. Down at their knees was the Olympian Crystal in one piece. Y/N picked it up. She could feel the power running through it. “But how did…?”
“Through the most powerful magic of all. Something that not even a god could compare to.” Peter grinned, “True love.”
“Are you saying that we have true love?” Y/N teased. Truthfully the thought made her want to jump up and down but she would never admit it.
“Seems so. Only makes sense that I would fall in love with the goddess of chaos.” Peter ruffled her hair. “And she made the unfortunate decision to love me back.”
“Why’s that unfortunate?” Y/N asked.
“Cause now you’re stuck with me forever, Chaos.” He pulled her into his arms.
“I think I can live with that.” She kissed him again. She held up the crystal with a wicked smile. “Now, my love, how do you feel about killing a god for our first date?”
“Sounds perfect to me.” He matched her insane smile. They were going to have so much fun!
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Balthazar Bratt Tag Dump:
Regular AU/Verse: ( rockin’ the 80’s. ); Bratt
These tags below will be added after the main one shown above. More tags will be added if needed.
AU TAGS TBA.
Visage tag: [ back and bigger than ever ]; Bratt visage Aesthetics tag: [ ninety-nine red balloons go by ]; Bratt aesthetic Musings tag: [ i’ve been a bad boy ]; Bratt musings Headcanons tag: [ how is that heist music?! ]; Bratt headcanons
#tag dump#muse; balthazar bratt#visage 🎹; bratt#aesthetic 🎹; bratt#musings 🎹; bratt#headcanons 🎹; bratt
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I’ve been trying to puzzle out how the Illyria situation might be kickstarted, especially with Koschei still lurking around. Dude has been waiting for years and I firmly believe he will make a move and an appearance in ACOTAR 5.
So. Going back to Illyria—
We’ve been told at the beginning of ACOSF that the rebels have been kind of dealt with. That dude, whose name I can’t even remember, who was the leader of the rebellion (if I’m not mistaken) died. And... that’s it. No one seems to be considering the rebels a threat anymore. Not even Rhysand, who instead of sending Cassian to keep an eye on them and eventually calm things down if needed, makes him play courtier or some shit. Completely disregarding the situation. He’s letting his guard down (I don’t blame him, though. Between baby Nyx, Briallyn, Eris, the Dread Trove etc, Illyria did seem the least of his problems in that moment).
The point is, everyone is underestimating Illyria.
Throughout the books we have Illyria being brought up multiple times, but the Blood Rite is the part I want to focus on because — surprise surprise — we learn that Koschei has in fact reached it. Bellius was one of his spy, and who knows if there were more.
Right now Illyria is in a critical position. I don’t expect them to react well to two females, one of them not even Illyrian, winning one of their most important and valued tradition. Some of the remaining rebels who have backed down when that dude whose name I can’t remember died, might gain some confidence once more and try to do something. Especially now that their High Lord has other things to worry about and nor him nor their general is paying attention to them.
If koschei has already infiltrated Illyria once, how do we know he won’t do it again? Especially now that it’s weak. He could promise them anything: independence from the Night Court, Rhysand’s death... anything, as far as we know.
And if he does, who is going to deal with it?
Azriel has the means and the power to do help them. Emerie and Balthazar might play a part in it, but they don’t have the power to kickstart it.
Illyria needs to be dealt with and Azriel is the only one who can do it.
Another thing that needs to be covered in the next installment and that makes me even more convinced of this theory is Rosehall. I’m fairly certain the place is located in Illyria, just not anywhere near Windhaven or any war camp. I think it might have been his father’s estate or something.
Anyway, if Koschei infiltrates Illyria as I’m predicting, and Illyria is not deemed safe anymore, where do we think our bat boy is going to take his momma? It’s not like there’s a warded, safe place meant exactly for women victims of violence like his momma, women who know, thanks to him, how to defend themselves in case of attack (highly doubt that, but you never know.) It’s not like he lives right above it, where he can always keep an eye on it and know if anything were to happen. And it’s not like his mom coming to that place was foreshadowed at all in ACOSF.
Oh, wait...
Good point anon!
I honestly was confused when early on it's mentioned that Illyria has been dealt with and I'm like "oh SJM is casually brushing it under the rug after making it seem like we're heading there in ACOFAS... okay?" and as you said throughout the book Illyria is being mentioned quite often. The change in Illyria as also mentioned more than once.
You know what line that convinced me Illyria will become a thing in the next book? Even before the Blood Rite took place? This:
“With the Blood Rite mere months away, he’d said, tensions were always high, but this year seemed particularly bad. New feuds popping up every few days, old grudges resurfacing” (Chapter 56, Pg. 588)
And this was more than halfway through the book. If SJM dismissed the issues in Illyria early on in the book then why did she keep bringing it up? Making it seem like the situation is getting even worse. Even Cassian said tensions were particularly bad this year. Things are getting more ugly in Illyria.
It's been mentioned that an ancient enemy was desperate to reach the rock at the top of Ramiel. Which ancient enemy we know of that is still around? Koschei. We still don't know what's under it.
It's also in Koschei's favor to strike into the heart of Prythian's largest army to win in the upcoming war so I can see how the next book could deal with that unrest.
As for Rosehall, we still don't know what it is or where it is. Could it be Azriel's estate? Could it be the name of a Town? Could it be a sanctuary? But why does Cassian question why Azriel did not bring his mother to the library if she is living somewhere in peace?
He wondered if Azriel’s mother had ever considered coming here, or if he’d ever pushed her to.
I'm excited to see her in the next book! I'm sure it will be an emotional moment.
Excellent points anon👏🏼
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EUPHORIA - Chapter 24
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader
Summary: He’s Dean Winchester, owner of a shady night club. She’s a journalist who has been asked to write an article to expose the indecency and debauchery that’s going on behind closed doors. But he’s also Dean Winchester, the boy who sat next to her in class. The boy who was too cocky for his own good.
Chapter Warning: NSFW, flangst
WC: 2824
A/N: This chapter fills my ‘voice kink’ square for @spnkinkbingo.
Beta’d by @deanwanddamons <3
This series is complete on Patreon!
Series Masterlist ~ SPN Masterlist
Become a Patron ~ Buy me a coffee
He’s pissed and overly grumpy. It’s too fucking early to be dealing with bullshit. But he’s also grumpy because he had to see Y/N off.
Walking around the corner, Cas’ notices him and nods.
“Again?” Dean asks, sees them washing down the red paint. It looks bloody and it smells awful. It almost made him nauseous.
“Yeah,” Cas sighs, “It’s nothing I couldn’t deal with, so I didn’t feel the need to call you.”
“That’s okay,” Dean crosses his arms over his chest, watches the paint come off the walls before he turns to Cas, “Security footage?”
“We got it,” Cas says, but he doesn’t look happy about it so Dean already knows that it’s probably not even worth mentioning, “The guy wore a Vendetta mask and was dressed in black.”
“Great,” Dean breathes out, his hand goes up to rub at his forehead. There’s a puddle of paint running down the pavement towards him, and he takes a step to the side.
It’s moments like these that Dean wants to give up completely. That he wants to just sell the whole fucking thing and go do something else, being a fucking accountant for the firm Sam’s working in or just something that’s less stressful. Somewhere where he has to deal with less hate, maybe. Less jealousy.
He places a hand on Cas’ shoulder, “You go home and get some shut eye. I’ll see you for the briefing later,”
“‘K,” Cas answers and turns to walk away. Looking back, he calls out to Dean, “Balth is waiting in your office!”
Dean groans and rolls his eyes at that.
Apparently, he can’t catch a fucking break around here.
*
Dean walks into his office and sees Balthazar sitting on the couch. The man’s busy working on his laptop. A scent of coffee lingers in the air. He must have brought a cup with him because Dean doesn’t have a coffee machine in his office. What he has, though, is a fucking bar and he wonders if it would be too soon to pour himself a couple of fingers? It’s probably five o’clock somewhere , right?
Even though his mouth waters at the thought of the burning liquid filling his throat and clouding his head, Dean abandons the thought quite quickly. She doesn’t like him to drink. It has a lot to do with how she grew up and Dean respects that, has toned it down since Y/N came back into his life, and he wants to keep that up.
“Balth,” Dean greets the man and walks over to his desk, sits down with a loud grunt, “What can I do for you?”
“How’s your hand?”
“Good.” Dean nods and holds it up, takes a look at it himself.
It’s bandaged. Y/N was telling him that he should let her do it or she’ll get angry at him. He smirks at the memory. He would have loved to say that she could get mad all she wants, because he likes how cute she looks when she’s mad, but he thinks that would have been a bad move on his part, so he just held still while she sat on his lap and bandaged his hand. The lap sitting was a deal he negotiated because he said that he wouldn’t let her if she wouldn’t sit on his lap. She rolled her eyes but sat down and it’s crazy how his lap was made for her to sit on.
Balthazar clears his throat before he closes his laptop, and Dean is catapulted back to reality. Back to an annoying work day. He thinks maybe he should take a break, ask her if she’s game to go on a road trip. Just the two of them, driving where the road takes them with no clear destination. Dean doesn’t think he needs one with her.
“I’ve stayed with Cole after you left.” Balthazar says while he places his laptop back into its bag.
“And?” Dean frowns.
“He won’t press charges,”
Dean snorts, “Yeah, because we have the upper hand.”
It’s no surprise. Dean knew that he wouldn’t. If he would, he’d see his ass in jail and Dean doubts that Cole would survive a day in there. All Dean wanted was to make a statement and he thinks that he was pretty clear about what the statement entailed.
“Still, you should be more careful with breaking bones.” Balthazar gets up from the couch and walks over to the chair across from Dean. He doesn’t sit down, though, only braces his hands on it, leaning in a little.
“He was touching what’s fucking mine, Balth. What do you want me to do?” Dean shouts out and immediately regrets his outburst because it hurt his own ears. He pinches the bridge of his nose. It’s too fucking early.
When Dean calms down a little, he asks, “So, you had your eyes on him? He wasn’t anywhere near the club?”
“Nope, I drove him to the ER and he underwent surgery to correct his fucking jaw that you broke. He’ll stay there for the next two days, at least.”
“Good,” Dean nods. It’s not exactly good when it comes to the club, though, because Cole’s out of the picture, “Can you get more people on board? I want someone watching the club after closing. It’s a tiny window of time, three, maybe four hours.”
Balthazar nods, “I can do that.”
*
After Balthazar left, Dean decided to start up his computer since he hasn’t checked his emails for a couple of days now. He deliberately doesn’t have his work emails on his phone. It’s his private property and he made it clear from the beginning that he’s separating work and private life.
Dean clicks through the emails. There are some new member sign ups that he needs to go through. Some harmless threats which he usually bins right away. But then there are some mails that are more worrying as well.
He clicks on the first one with the title I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST NIGHT . The email opens up to pictures of the altercation in front of Y/N’s office building. Dean can see that it was shot from across the street. Maybe from a parked car. He immediately forwards the pictures to Balthazar.
There are more emails. Without pictures though, just words. Hurtful ones.
I WILL TAKE YOU AND YOUR CLUB DOWN
YOU ARE A FUCKING DISGUSTING HUMAN BEING
SHAME ON YOU
YOUR CLUB WILL BE CLOSED. MARK MY WORDS
It’s really nothing new. He gets those threats quite a lot and he always makes sure to block the sender but they keep making new email accounts and so he’ll keep deleting and blocking them. Dean can’t win in this, but neither can they, so at least there’s that.
*
Later in the day, while Dean’s briefing his employees, his phone vibrates in his pocket. He fishes it out, thinks it’s Balthazar calling him about new developments. The man had called earlier already, only to suggest for Dean to get a fucking bodyguard but Dean really doesn’t know about that. He just thinks it’s a waste of money. Only when Balth mentioned that Y/N’s safety might be in danger too, does Dean at least agree to consider it.
Dean stops his speech to look at the caller ID, has to suppress his smirk while he holds up his index finger, “I gotta take this one, Cas?”
“Yeah,” The other man jumps in, grins himself because he knows, and Dean actually wants to wipe that smile from Cas’ face but he gotta hurry if he wants to take it before she hangs up on him.
Dean turns around, picks it up, smiles like an idiot because apparently, he lost the ability to control his fucking face, “Hey,” Dean walks up the stairs and disappears into the VIP room for some privacy.
“I’m sorry, am I interrupting? You must be busy.”
It sounds like she’s pouting, Dean bites back a chuckle, “No, it’s okay, you never interrupt. How’s the workshop going?”
He tries to sound cheerful, doesn’t want to tell her about the things that happened yet. There’s no need for her to worry, really.
“Ugh, boring,” Y/N sighs, and adds, “I have a short break before I have to go for the mandatory dinner.”
Dean flips his wrist, sees that it’s past 5pm. He grins, “You wanna spice things up at the dinner?”
“Dean,”
“What?” He chuckles.
“Well,” Her voice is almost whiny as she considers his words, “Yeah?”
“That’s my girl,” Dean smiles, “Jesus, I’m getting all excited myself.”
Cas appears in the room and Dean nods at him, “Baby, I gotta go, I need to finish something here,”
“Okay,” It sounds like she’s pouting and god, Dean feels bad for making her feel like he doesn’t have time for her or that he doesn’t care when all he’s doing is to make fucking time. But he guesses she’ll understand once they see each other.
“Wear it and let me know when you’re going to dinner, alright?”
“Yeah,” She sighs, “Miss you.”
Dean sighs, closes his eyes briefly, his heart flutters at those words. He smiles at the feeling, “I miss you, too.”
Y/N runs up to her room right after dinner, keys in her hand and leans back against the closed door as soon as she’s inside. She’s dripping wet from that vibe but she didn’t come yet. She doesn’t know how Dean does it but he always managed to stop when she’s about to come, making her whine out audibly once, and when Charlie, her friend from college who sat next to her asked what was wrong, she just said that she liked the food very much.
God, it was so embarrassing!
She thinks about calling him but he’s probably busy working as it’s already past 10pm and the club is at its peak right about now.
Taking off her shoes, she walks to the bathroom to clean her face and she brushes her teeth, walking out into the bedroom shortly after. She quickly gets out of her dress and slips out of her panties that are completely soaked.
The device is still inside of her and clear enough, it starts to buzz again, making her shriek out. She swears if he won’t let her come again—
—her phone rings.
Letting herself fall onto the bed, still in only her bra and nothing else — except for the vibrator in her pussy — she grabs at her clutch that she left there before she walked to the bathroom.
Dean.
The vibrator still buzzes lightly inside of her and she picks up, has to gnaw on her bottom lip to suppress the moan.
“You are the worst!” It blurts out of her as soon as she swipes her thumb across the screen.
“Wait, what?” He’s laughing loudly.
“Yeah,” She pouts and moves up the bed, rests her back against the headboard while she spreads her legs and enjoys the buzzing between her thighs, “You turn me on and then you stop, and I was so close to coming.”
“Awe, poor baby,” Dean says in his mumbling voice and it sounds so fucking sexy, “Are you still turned on?”
“Yeah,” She mutters under her breath, “Please, you have to let me come.”
“I don’t know,” He chuckles, “Have you been good, Y/N?”
Oh my god , he’s pulling that card, isn’t he?
“I have. Please?” She nods and whines, teeth sinking into her bottom lip when she feels the buzzing getting stronger, moaning out shamelessly.
“Christ, you sound so fucking sexy,”
She can hear him growl on the other end.
“No, you do,” There’s another increase of vibration and god, it makes her arch her back, as a shrieking sound rolls off her tongue.
“I do? I don’t think so, sweetheart. I’m getting hard just hearing you moan.”
“It— ah— it’s your v—voice, Dean.”
“My voice? What’s with my voice, baby?”
And it’s like he’s taunting her because it rolls deep, smooth like fucking honey and it feels like he’s wrapping her up in the warm sound. He increases the vibrations, and she didn’t know it could go further up but it does. One of her hands goes to her tit, kneads at it while she has a tight grip around her phone with the other.
“Ah— it’s.. Fuck— it’s so deep and gravelly and oh god— it’s sexy,”
“Yeah?” He chuckles, “Bet you’re so wet, ain’tcha, baby? You always are so wet for me. It’s the fucking best thing. Especially when you gush and come around my cock, Jesus—”
His breathing is ragged, he’s turned on too.
Good , she thinks. At least she’s not the only one.
“My panties were soaked. I took them off and now I’m on my bed in only my bra,” She manages to say, tongue darts out to wet her lips, “Wish you were here.”
“I wish I was there too. Wish I could kiss you. I’d be right between your thighs right now, eating you out like you’re the sweetest thing, because you fucking are,” It comes out a little strained, “Does me telling you these thing turn you on, huh?”
“Yeah,” She chokes out a moan, “You could read me the goddamn phone book and it would turn me on, Dean.”
“Christ, I’m just imagining you right now, all spread out and wet,” There’s a low growl before he speaks again, “Can you do me a favor, huh?”
“Uh-huh,”
“Use your words, sweetheart,” His voice is more stern. Doesn’t make it less sexy, though.
“Yes,”
“Good girl,”
God the praise . Y/N has to press her thighs together, already so fucking close.
Dean goes on, “Take off your bra for me, baby. Take your thumb and forefinger, give them a firm tug for me, bet your nipples are sensitive, huh? I wanna hear you.”
She sits up to unclasp her bra before she throws it carelessly into the room. Leaning back again, her right hand goes to her left nipple, tugs hard and moans out in pained pleasure.
“Good girl,” He coos, “Such a fucking good girl,”
The vibration increases again and she thinks that’s the maximum it can go. Hopes it is, because she’s right there, dancing dangerously on the edge.
“Dean, please, I’m—”
“—I got you, baby,” He breathes out a soft chuckle, “Come, you can come, now. Come for me, okay? I wanna hear you come for me.” His whispering low, and the words paired with his voice, plus the added buzzing in her cunt was enough to tip her over.
Oh god. His voice is really out of his world. She comes with a squeal. His name rolls off her tongue as she squeezes her eyes shut and her legs start to tremble. Her hips buck up and she doubles over and has to roll herself into a fetal position on the bed.
There’s a ringing in her ear from the orgasm and she feels the vibration getting softer until it’s completely gone. Dean’s voice is faint in her ear through the phone.
Good girl. My fucking good girl.
She swallows hard, her eyes are still closed. When Y/N comes back to her senses, she starts to giggle and then she hears it. The knock at her door.
“What’s so funny?” Dean asks as she sits up straight, startled from the knocking.
“Oh my god, someone just knocked at my door.” She says, her heart’s still pounding fast.
“Go on, open it.”
“No, who would knock at this time of night? I’m sure they just have the wrong room.” She doesn’t know if she’s trying to talk to him or talk herself out of her anxiety of the realization that someone came knocking at her door late at night.
“Maybe it’s room service?”
“Dean, I just came from dinner, I didn’t order anything!”
“Jesus Christ, I didn’t think it would be this hard!” Dean growls and she might be hearing things because she hears the deep growl outside of her door? He sighs then, “Baby, I really think you should open up.”
“Oh my god, you didn’t... Dean, no.” She scrambles off the bed, and somehow she doesn’t even care if she’s fucking naked.
“Dean, yes!” He chuckles lightly, “Come on, I’m standing in the hallway with a visible boner and I think if someone sees it, they’ll call the cops.”
She hangs up and drops the phone onto the bed as she makes her way to the door, opens it up wide to see Dean smiling at her.
Chapter 25
Please share your thoughts with me, I’d love to hear your feedback.
#euphoria#spnkinkbingo#dean winchester#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x you#dean winchester fic#dean winchester fan fic#dean winchester fan fiction#nathalie writes
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Church Fun
Gabriel stuffed, yes stuffed, the three older archangels into his car and skipped over to the drivers side. “Gabriel, what in dad’s name are you making us do?” Michael hissed from the passenger’s seat. Michael was in the middle of a movie with Sam and it was just getting good when Gabriel literally dragged him out of the room.
Gabriel smiled at him and turned the car on. “Put y’all’s seatbelts on!” Gabriel giggled to himself at the inside joke he had with himself. He waited until he heard four clicks before leaving the Bucker. Safety mattered, even for archangels.
Gabriel drove for a good ten minutes before parking in front of a church. Raphael let out a weird noise and stiffened. The other two raised their eyebrows before getting out. Gabriel dragged the three into the church. “Gabriel, what is going on?” Michael asked, looking around at the walls and ceiling. He would give the humans credit, it was actually pretty beautiful.
Gabriel hummed and looked at some of the statues that this particular church had. He then lead his confused brothers to the side of the church and look up at the windows. “Hehe Michael, they made you look like a girl.” Gabriel giggled and pointed to one of the larger windows. It showed Michael’s six blue wings unfolded and a soft feminine-ish face.
Michael growled lowly. “Shut up Gabriel. At least they didn’t make me a full on girl.” He teased back, pointing to the window that had Saint. Archangel Gabriel underneath the picture of Gabriel with his wings spread out. Gabriel pouted. He hasn’t even used a female vessel. The only one that was ‘female’ was a trans male. (Female turning male if that didn’t make sense)
Lucifer hid a laugh by stuffing his face on Raphael’s shoulder. “Look at what they did to Raph! They gave him red wings.” That was an insult for angels. Only one angel has ever had red wings and they where even more evil then Lucifer. That angel died long before the humans though. They tried to kill Chuck once and Chuck was forced to kill them. Every angel still loves them though.
Raphael huffed annoyed. “How did they get red form green!?” Honestly though!
Gabriel patted Raphael’s shoulder comfortingly. “At least they didn’t do you they way they did Lucifer.”
Michael fell to the floor in giggles when he saw Lucifer’s window. Lucifer, the most beautiful angel there was, painted as the ugliest thing. Michael honestly could not stop laughing. Lucifer pouted. “That’s just rude! My true form looks nothing like that! I’m not even red. And my wings are pink!”
Gabriel laughed as he moved on to the next thing. “Come on! Keep up assholes.” The other three glare at the stain glass windows before following the youngest archangel. Gabriel lead them into the altar and flipped off one of the statues that reminded him of Balthazar.
Sense it was Sunday, so the room was filled and there was a pastor preaching. Then, quickly and quietly, they move to the back and sit down on one of the benches. “God doesn’t want us to love the same gender the way a husband would love his wife-“
“Whao! What!? When the fuck did he say that!?” Gabriel called out. He doesn’t remember his father ever saying that.
The pastor gave him a patient small. “Ah. You must be new to this! Good to know that there is a new soul finding God and His never ending love! To answer your question, Genesis 19. You may use of one of the Bibles that are in front of you if you like.”
Lucifer giggled quietly as Gabriel stood up. This is going to be good. “Ya that entire story is about pedophiles. You know, those people that like to grope kids? They just happened to be two men doing it.”
The priest stood there in shock. Then a middle aged white women turned around. “How dare you go against the word of the Lord! You will burn for that!” The room filled with gasps.
Gabriel chuckled darkly. “And what? Scaring people that they will be going to to hell doesn’t make you go to hell? Also, the Americans in like the 18 hundreds or something paid the English church to make the translation say that. They did that because it made someone get uncomfortable, too bad from them. Go cry to mommy. The word that they used in the Bible actually means pedophilia. When the Bible said ‘If you are man you shall sleep boy’ it ment adult and child. Honestly, does the dude need to spell it out? It’s kind of self explanatory! Man and boy. Two different things. One is a child and one is a adult.”
Michael whistled and rubbed the back of his neck. He didn’t like all of the eyes looking in his direction. It made him really comfortable. It was very Dean like. The priest blushed with embarrassment. “Sir, please, sit down and keep it to yourself.”
Gabriel glared at him. “No! You are scaring people into thinking they will go to hell for who they love! There is at least 15 children in here that are gay. Maybe bisexual. You then say God has unconditional, unwavering love. But the second you are gay, oh, he no longer loves you. Why kind of bull- bs is that!? Kids, you won’t go to hell because you love someone of the same gender.”
The priest slammed his hand down on the Bible. “Sir! It is not ok! You will go to hell for it children! Do not let this unfaithful man tell you different!”
Gabriel didn’t even flinch. “No fuck you wont! You’re just made because I’m making more sense then that paper! Half of the crap that is on there is, well, crap! It’s been translated so many times in different ways you humans don’t even know what’s ‘right’ or ‘wrong’!”
One of the teens in the room stood up. “Thank you!” She shouted. “That’s what I’ve been trying to say my entire God forsaken life!” The mother of that girl gasped and told her to watch her mouth. “Oh for fucks sake mother! I seriously doubt the dude cares if you use is name in vain.”
Gabriel pointed at her. “He really doesn’t! In fact, He does it Himself!”
The girl tilted her head. “How do you know?” It was general childish curiosity. Gabriel found it kind of cute.
Gabriel smirked. “Well you see-“
“Gabriel no-“ Raphael stood up panicking slightly. Not this again. Something like this has happened once long ago and Raphael honestly didn’t want to relive it.
“Gabriel yes!”
Lucifer looked over at him with a tired expression. “Gabe, not the best idea.”
“Shut up Lucifer. I know that He does because I’m the Archangel Gabriel.” Then he rolled his shoulders back, making shadows with his wings show and the light all went out, the bulbs exploding, and Gabriel’s halo glowed slightly. Everyone gasped.
Micheal sighed. “Gabriel, now you scared the priest!” The man held a cross to his chin and was praying very very fast.
Gabriel stuck his tongue out at him. Gabriel then winked at the girl who was looking at him in amazement and snapped his fingers. He moved himself and his brothers back to the car and drove off laughing hysterically.
“Oh Dad! I can’t believe you just did that!” Lucifer laughed loudly. Raphael was doubled over laughing, wheezing. Michael had his face in his hands but was shaking slightly. “Wait until dad hears that prayer! Oh it’s so over for us!”
Gabriel just continued to laugh and drive. Today was a good day for the second oldest group of siblings.
(I found the fanart on google images)
#omg#go off king#Gabriel is me at church#I actually looked some of that up#i did research#Michael and Raphael sitting there like#who is this man#idk him#and Lucifer like#PERIODT#THATS MY BROTHER#archangels supernatural#supernatural#michael supernatural#lucifer spn#rapheal supernatural#gabriel spn
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For the secrets asks! Time to include all the lovely beebs <3
🍻 For Nyra
🏹 or 🌧 for Ren
🐇 for Sanne
🌟 for Liv
and🙃 for El
Feel free to skip any of these if you don't feel like answering them or use this as a free space to answer one you do wanna talk about :D
(@uselessidiotsquad)
Ty for the ask <3 All the beebs ahoy <3
🍻 For something bad/mischievous you did as a child or teen that your parents don’t know about:
Nyra: "My parents have always told me I was a leader. And I was, all the court children navigated around me like moth to flame, and though most of them were spoiled brats without care, trained only to suck it up to the Queen or a minister, there were few good ones. One of them, a boy mercilessly teased for belonging to a family of Orrian descent, I often felt protective over but had no other means to defend him rather than with words. But when my magic came, and one of his bullies was walking in procession of Dwayna's holy week with a magically lit candle, I stalked them and whenever it was important that the light was on, manipulated it to go down. Now, I do realise how dangerous that was - an untrained guardian is a danger not only to themselves, but also others around them, but the bully's desperation was evident and I wanted them to suffer as much as my friend had.
In my defense, I was 15, Deborah had just gone missing and I wanted someone else to feel as miserable as I did. I don't know if they still worship Dwayna, but I hope that my misjudged sense of justice hadn't deterred them from their faith."
🌧 For a heavy, emotional secret
Ren: "Over the course of my life, I've had to give up many things, often abruptly, without a note, clearing all traces behind me so nobody knew I was there. For example, there was no way the Vera - child of spies who grew up on the streets of the Reach - could leave any trace behind her, else the four years I've spent hidden away at the Chantry of Secrets would've been for nothing. But in vanishing without a trace, I left Petra - the sweet, sweet Petra who'd taken me to her father's apple orchard outside the city for that first kiss at 15 - praying for my soul every now and then. I sometimes assign someone to watch her, an Initiate with no real spying experience, or even go myself when my missions allow it.
Vera is dead, gone by her own hand the night before her hanging, and she left behind kids who've since ended up on the gallows themselves, or in prison, because they had nobody to guide them. It doesn't matter, really, a few lives here and there. I'd kill my own partners on the field had the need arose. I don't think about them often."
🐇For a secret item they keep (stuffed animal, comfort object, etc)
Sanne: "I still keep my first catch. It's nothing to boast over - Issormir's head stands proudly on my wall, for instance, which has the much greater value than the little animal I'd caught at 8 years old. It's a little rabbit bone, but I remember my father being so proud of it that he shouted at the next moot how his daughter was a hunter now because she'd caught a rabbit. Ragna would laugh if she knew, she teases me about those things, but I know she keeps her book of basic necromancer spells somewhere. The bone reminds me of his pride and my own and a time before the Elder dragons."
🌟For a secret wish or desire of theirs
Liv: "Sometimes, I wish I was a thief. I'm happy with what I am, really, but sometimes I wish I was an asuran thief who could just sneak past anything and anyone in stealth mode without being seen. My feet would also not dangle off the edges of many beds that way and even with all the fur, norn winters are off the charts when it comes to cold, especially on defenseless feet. I got claws, sure, but claws don't scratch away the cold.
I would also not sweat as much in summer. It's silly, but sometimes, sometimes, sometimes, I wish I was an asuran thief."
🙃 For a lighter, slightly embarrassing secret
El: "Before I say anything, I would just like to say that it's not my fault us plants are flammable. Only good flammable plant is a Mordrem, but I'm not hiding the fact I burned Mordrem. In fact, I would burn Mordrem again. I just wish I was more coherent when I did it, so I could hear the dragon's life force sizzle away in their green, nasty bodies as they burn to ash. But the said bitch dragon was screaming in my head at the time, thus depriving me of my only real potential source of good things in that wretched jungle.
Bad flammable plants are sylvari. Especially elementalist sylvari, without counting myself. Really, it wasn't my fault, do you even know how hard training elemental magic is? Anger at your fingertips, ready to fire, easy to rise and slow to cool down, hard to temper and moderate? It's almost like working with remnant god magic - Balthazar's sword looks intensely promising, with lingering flames not of this realm-
Anyway. There was this elementalist, earth magic, and she had yet to master the art of selective earthquakes in unholy hours of the night when all but Nightblooms are asleep and we were sitting beside a really pretty house when the ground started shaking all of a sudden and what was I to do but unleash a ball of fire that caught on said pretty house....
Needless to say, we never spoke of it to anyone. Only Niamh and Dagonet knew, because they helped us put it down, but I think Kahedins knew too because he was giving me strange and annoyed looks for a while after that...
Kahedins, make your creations not flammable and we'll talk. You're dear to me, but please, make plants not flammable. I believe in you."
#gw2#ask meme#ty for the ask!#alysannyra#elandrin aien#renira sulver#livion stormbreath#aisanne bjornsdottir#as always as always#el the ever considerate man#varying levels of self-awareness in this ask#makeplantsnotflammable1305#baby eles are dangerous creatures
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Top 10 Things I Love About Supernatural
It’s been almost half a year since the show ended and now that the dust has settlIed, I just want to list ten reasons I love this show. Despite it’s flaws, it’s been quite the ride.
1. Team Free Will
When I first got the idea to make this list, I originally planned on doing entirely separate entries for “Sam & Dean” and “Destiel”. Except then I wanted to pay tribute to “Sastiel”. And then I wanted to do an entry for “Team Free Dads”. By that point, I was already halfway through the list and I hadn’t even moved on from the main characters. A few months ago, I made a post about why I love every single pairing in this group. Obviously, Sam and Dean are a legendary duo. Obviously, Dean and Cas have an unparalleled story. Obviously, Sam and Cas are an underrated team. As for Team Free Dads, I’ve always had a soft spot for father/mentor figure characters and and all three tackle the role in different ways. I love Jack, too. I love how everyone in this bizarro family is “broken” in some way. We’ve got the Allistair’s prized pupil, the spawn of satan, the boy with demon blood, and the angel who nearly obliterated all of heaven. But they help each other heal by being supportive and seeing the good in each other. They all love each other so deeply and when together, nothing can stand in their way. Not Michael, not Lucifer, and not God himself. They tore up the book and wrote their own story. And it was a pleasure to watch it all unfold.
2. The Suppporting Characters
To list every single supporting character I have loved and lost in this show would take way too long. I don’t know if it’s the writing or acting performances, but I love pretty much every single supporting character on this show. Even villains like Azazel or Allistair are top-notch villains. Hell, I even like characters like Metatron, Lucifer, Mary, and John! Characters like Rufus, Charlie, Crowley, Rowena, Kevin, Ellen, Jo, Bobby, Gabriel, Balthazar, Mick...how am I not supposed to love them??? All of their stories were cut so short. I’d watch a show about any of these characters. The Wayward Sisters were robbed. So many ships were gone too soon (Sam/Rowena, Dean/Jo, Cas/Meg, Etc.). So many heartbreaking deaths. I want to be best friends with all these characters. Why be a “dean-girl” or a “sam-girl” when you can be a garth-girl? A kevin-girl? A claire-girl? A bela-girl? There are so many great characters with interesting and compelling backstories and so much untapped potential. I could go on forever on this, but I digress.This show has one of the best supporting casts I have ever had the pleasure of watching.
3. The Themes
It’s no accident that I got addicted to this show at the time that I did. Namely, my Senior Year of College and 2020. Graduating college and entering the “real world” felt like it’s own sort of apocalypse. 2020 definitely exacerbated my worst tendencies. Messages like “family don’t end in blood”, “you can write your own story”, and “always keep fighting” really resonated with me. I could definitely relate to the feelings of insecurity these character’s felt and the ways they suppressed/repressed their issues instead of facing them. I could relate to the feelings of not fitting in and I could definitely relate to the loneliness. This show helped remind me that I’m not alone. That it’s okay if my values and identity don’t line up with the what I envisioned for myself. And, most importantly, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and that I should never give up. If Dean, Sam, and Cas can keep moving forward despite their demons and despite how bad it gets, so can I. Regardless of how the story ended, these themes resonated with me and I’ll still hold them with me. A single episode can’t take that away.
4. The Fun Episodes
This show has so many legendary standalone episodes. Changing Channels. Ghostfacers. The French Mistake. Fan Fiction. Tall Tales. Bad Day at Black Rock. When this show goes for the absurd, it goes all-in. It takes the risks it needs to take, it gets completely insane, and it pulls it off. So many of these episodes could have easily been the moment that the show “jumped the shark”. Yet, time after time, the show delivered on it’s potential. I don’t know how much I can say about these episodes except that they made me laugh out loud, made me fall even harder for these characters, and that they’re the episodes I remember best. If I were to rewatch any episode, it would be one of the fun ones. This show knew how to not take itself too seriously and how to poke fun at itself. I’ve always had a soft spot for shows that can make me laugh and cry (X-Files, Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel, Doctor Who, etc.), and this show definitely nails the fun part.
5. The Sad Episodes
Death’s Door. Hammer of the Gods. Despair. Carry On. Abandon All Hope. In My Time of Dying. Swan Song. When this show wants you to cry, it doesn’t pull the punches. It gets downright devastating. No character is safe. Literally every character you love will either be forgotten or will die. Or both. The amount of trauma Sam and Dean have to go through is insane. Both have literally been to hell and back. Both have killed countless people, including innocents. When this show decides it wants to wreck you, it’s overwhelming. I sobbed when Bobby died. I sobbed when every single member of Team Free Will died for the final time (I still can’t watch any of those scenes). I still wish Jo, Ellen, Charlie, Kevin, Mick, and Gabriel had been given more time to tell their stories. Being a hunter means a life of endless angst. Being an angel or demon doesn’t get you off the hook, either. I remember going into this show thinking it couldn’t hurt me. My favorite character type is “mentor/father figure”. But holy hell...I don’t think every single sad moment was necessarily good writing, but when it was? Damn.
6. The Biblical Themes
I’m not a relgious person. But, despite this show being steeped in Christian mythology, it really touched on my feelings about the Old Testament in a profound way. Well, really just Ben Edlund and Robbie Thompson did. I’ve never seen a show really hit the overall feel of the bible the way this show does. The idea of Angels as mystical and terrifying creatures. The idea of God as a flawed father figure with a penchant for wrath. The sheer epicness of the biblical stories. The idea of family members constantly being turned on each other. Cain and Abel. Jacob and Essau. Moses and Ramses. Moses and Aaron. Abraham and Isaac. The bible is full of stories of family drama. This show doesn’t always give angels and demons weight. Sometimes it’s silly and stupid and cheesy. But when it hits right? It’s epic. This is more of a personal thing I love about the show, but definitely a plus!
7. The Music
The early seasons music is so good. I really miss the classic rock of the golden era of the show. I mean, there are still some great musical moments later on, but damn. I loved hearing songs I recognized and I loved learning new songs. I loved when the song and the scene hit perfectly in time (Death’s intro. Cas’s return in Season 13.). Also Supernatural wouldn’t be Supernatural without the ‘Carry On My Wayward Son’ song at the end of every season. Even at the end of a season I didn’t love, that recap would always get me pumped. Also Chuck singing Fare Thee Well? Dean and Lee singing together? Fan Fiction? All great.
8. The Cast & Crew
I never care about the actors or actresses in a show. I definitely don’t bother with the names of specific writers and directors or their styles of writing/directing. They’re just random people who happen to write for or play these characters I love. They’re not actually the characters. But these guys? Well, for one, I’m pretty sure half this cast actually is their character. At least to some degree. They’re also just...really cool people? Who are all friends? They make a point to do community service, to interact with fans, and to promote positive ideas. Jared’s Always Keep Fighting campaign. Misha and GISH. The fact that they all participate in fundraising opportunities and encourage fan engagement. Do they all have issues? Definitely. Have they said stupid things? Yes. But the good far outweighs the bad. They’re an entertaining bunch whether onscreen or not and I hope they all do well in whatever their future endeavors may be.
9. The Fandom
I joined this fandom late. To be honest, I thought this fandom was obnoxious before I found myself a part of it. Now that I’ve been in the trenches? It’s got it’s ups and downs like any fandom. There are some parts that are more toxic than others. A lot of people yelling that their opinion is the only opinion. But overall? The good outweighs the bad. And the good? The good is great. Some fanfictions I’ve read are better than actual books I’ve read and just as moving. The fanart? Incredible. I love reading all the metas about random aspects of the show I never would have noticed. I love the music videos and I love the analytical videos. In real life, I’ve made many friends through our mutual love of this show. Hell, even getting sucked into GISH once or twice has given me some solid memories and brought me closer to friends. I wish all fandoms were this much like family. I’m so glad I got to be a part of this fandom and I can’t wait to continue being a fan. After all, nothing ever stays dead in Supernatural.
10. The Chaos & Insanity
Season 16 has been a time. First, Destiel went canon. Then suddenly Sherlock was having a 5th season, Putin was retiring, and Georgia was going blue. Destiel going “canon” and Joe Biden winning the presidency will always be correlated in my mind now. Things in the fandom went from quiet to blaringly loud real fast. Carry On happened. The fandom went into a civil war. I can’t even remember half of what happened in Season 16, but it’s been a wild ride. There’s been ups (my personal favorite being the french dub and the Saileen wedding). There’s been downs (Jared’s controversial statements and the original scripts being leaked). At one point Misha Collins had sex with Bill Clinton???? It’s been a wild time. It’s honestly gotten me through the end of this pandemic. At least it’s entertaining. I would say that at least all the craziness is over, but is it ever really over? Every time I say that something else completely insane happens. But it’s been fun. I’m glad I started watching this show despite my reservations and here’s to whatever happens next.
#team free will#team free will 2.0#castiel#jack kline#sam winchester#dean winchester#sam and dean#destiel#wayward sisters#supernatural#spn#misha collins#jared padalecki#jensen ackles
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The Aftermath
-1-
"Fuck, this is boring" Dean mumbled to the open field and drank his cold beer. He was leaning on the Impala parked on the side of the road. He'd been in heaven some months now, and already he had traveled through heaven's version of the U.S. twice now, but without the things that go bump in the night, without Sammy, and without Cas he felt kind of pointless and ...lonely. He wasn't though, not really, he regularly went to mom and dad's, and Bobby's, and to Ellen and Jo's, and to other people that were already there, but the place certainly lacked something. The most emotion he'd gotten was when he fought his way into Angel's HQ looking for Cas and Jack, he didn’t find them so he coerced a couple of angels to regularly inform him about how Sammy was, and whatever little they knew about what Cas and Jack were up to.
He closed his eyes and prayed aloud "Cas, man, I know you're busy with Jack and... stuff... but if you could come by sometime, just to let me know you're okay, just for a second... come on, buddy, I'm at highway XX at the XX marker", he finished his beer much slowlier than needed and climbed into the car, with his head on the steering wheel, he waited.
Every day he prayed to Cas, he told him what was going on with the family, or what he was up to, a memory from the good old days, or a random thought, and where he was, always where he was... just in case. Sometimes he was angry, demanding, sometimes he was almost pleading, the sadness and loneliness seeping out in his words, but he never talked about Cas's last moments on Earth, he couldn't talk about that, wouldn’t even think about that. He usually also sent a little prayer to the kid, some stupid story to make him laugh, or a memory of the few they shared, those prayers were shorter and easier, left him feeling a bit lighter.
Every day he had no answer.
When enough time had passed he snorted, turned the key, and started off. Some miles ahead he turned on the stereo, Metallica started playing loudly, but he wasn't singing along, his face was tight, jaw clenched, his soul felt heavy, hope was a bitch that got him every time. "Hello, Dean", a voice strained through the music. The car swiveled left then right crazily fast as Dean forced control over the steering wheel. "Cas" he breathed out.
Hastily he thrust the car to a stop on the side of the road and threw himself to the angel on his side, "Cas, finally!", he said and held on tightly, the angel returned the hug awkwardly, "I've been praying to you. Everyday! Where have you been?", he said when he finally let go, his relief had morphed to fury now. The angel looked sheepish, "I know. We've been working. It's taking longer than expected", Cas's eyes diverted to the back seat and he followed his gaze, "Jack!", Dean said and put a gentle hand on the boy's head, "I've been praying to you, too", the boy smiled, "I heard you, you made me laugh", his smile was as wide as ever, but there was something else there too, something heavy, concern? Dean wondered. "Ok, what's up?", he asked, "what do you mean?", Jack’s confusion was blatant on his face, he was a god now but in many ways, he was still just a kid, their kid. He looked at Cas, "you are not here on a social call, just tell me what’s going on", Dean's voice was serious now, back to business, his eyes half-rolled, but there was the faintest shadow of a smirk on his face, he was glad to be needed and even more glad to see them. Finally.
Cas lifted his hand and snapped his fingers, "what the hell, Cas?", Dean said, but then he noticed where they were, the bunker, "Sammy?", his voice was low, longing, then louder as he stood up from his chair, looking around, "Sam!", "He is not here, Dean. We are in heaven still", Dean swirled to face Cas, "Where is him? Where is Sam?", "He is on a vampire case in Atlanta, he is fine. This is not about Sam. I- I thought a familiar place would be better", "Better for what?", Cas looked at Jack, then again at Dean, "As you know, heaven is short on angels at the moment. We've been trying to bring them back from the empty", now Dean was pissed, "Come again? You want to resurrect those assholes who wanted me and my brother dead? And you and Jack, they wanted you dead too, Cas!", "Not all of them, Dean", "Yeah? Like who?", Cas looked at Jack and then down to his hands before sitting down and answering, "Balthazar, Hannah, Samandriel, Gabriel, Michael,...", Cas said and Dean started to understand, they were the closest Castiel had to angel friends, he must be feeling guilty for their deaths, suddenly, Cas lifted his head and gazed at Dean, the fuck? Dean thought. Cas was staring at him meaningfully, but the message wasn't getting through, after a few seconds of silence, Cas said, "Anna".
Dean tried to hold Cas’s stare questioningly, but the angel stood up and walked toward a bookcase. After an uncomfortable while, Jack said, "Can you help us?", looking at each of them in turn. Damn, he'd forgotten the kid was there. “What? uh, I, uh, what can I do about this?”, he looked at Cas for the answer, but he was still leaning with his hand on a bookcase. “We can’t get in”, Jack said. He explained that he was no longer able to get beings out of The Empty, nor enter it himself. He didn’t even know if he was able to wake them. The Empty must have done something to block him since he got Castiel out. “I want to ask Chuck about The Empty”, he finished, “You what?”, Dean was exasperated, this was not what he intended when he asked them to come by, “I told you it’s a bad idea”, Cas said finally. “But he doesn’t have powers anymore, he can’t do anything to us”, Jack said, it was clear he’d already had this argument with Cas, “And what makes you think that he will help us? He can trick you. He will trick you”, “That’s why we need you, he won’t be able to trick you, and I can make him talk, he’s human now, humans talk”, “You will not do that!”, Castiel and Dean said at the same time, “That’s not who you are, Jack”, Cas added, “You won’t ever do that!”, Dean said and stalked out of the room.
Without thinking, he went to baby, he was so used to the quiet of the road he craved it whenever something rubbed him the wrong way, but he’d waited so long for them to come by, he wasn’t leaving. He walked back inside, directly to his old room, everything was the same. He wondered what had Sammy done with his things. Had he given his room to another hunter? Somehow he doubted that. Maybe he took it for himself, it would be a mess by now. The thought brought a smile to his face. He laid on his memory mattress and closed his eyes. The thought of Jack torturing someone was disturbing but silly. Jack wouldn’t do that, he probably wasn’t even talking about that, it was just Dean’s own experience that had made him angry, the shame of the kid finding out about it. He should go talk to them, he decided, but in a while, he’d missed this bed.
Thoughts came by unbidden now. The awkward way Cas hugged him back, the pointed look, the way he said “Anna” and immediately walked away, what was that about? Was it- was it jealousy? He hadn’t allowed himself to think about Cas’s words before The Empty took him, but they were there, in the back of his head, “I love you, Dean”, he’d said, what did that mean, exactly? Cas had said those words before, to them when close to death, but that time it had felt different. He tried to remember, the exact words, “happiness isn’t in having but in being, in saying it, I love you, Dean”, and The Empty had been summoned because Cas was finally happy because he loved Dean and told him. Nope! No! That wasn’t it. He meant something else and was too ‘Cas’ to explain it properly and Dean too dumb to get it. It must have been something else. Not that. Not that. “Dean”, a soft voice called from the door, and Dean jumped so hard he nearly fell off the bed.
“Dean, I’m sorry. Were you sleeping?”, how long’s he been standing there? can he read my mind? does he know? “Eh, uh, I, no, I, no, I was thinking… about Jack and Chuck and all that”, “Ohh. Are you ok? About hell - Jack, didn’t mean to- he doesn’t know the details”, “I know, Cas, it’s fine, I’m fine, I’ll come out in a moment. We’ll figure it out”. Cas seemed to analyze him for a bit and decide he was fine, “There’s something else”, he said and looked at the floor, “Can I come in?”. “Uhm, yeah, yeah, come in, Cas”. He shut the door and sit on the bed next to Dean, “What’s- What’s up?”, “Dean, I’ve been struggling with this for a while. The reason why I’ve been avoiding you is that I am ashamed”, Dean swallowed hard, here we go, damn it, “I’ve failed you, Dean, I’ve failed Jack. I’ve been trying to help him figure out how to restore heaven but I have no idea what I’m doing. I don’t want to become what I was the last time I failed you”, what? “What?”. “You know the things I did, Dean, when I took God’s place, I told Jack everything, but he says it’s not the same. He says that’s not what I’m doing and who I am anymore, but I- I don’t know. What if he’s wrong?”
At that moment his heart broke for Cas. He sat up and put his hand on Cas’s back. He’d known that he regretted the things he had done, but he never knew how deep his actions had affected him and shattered his confidence in his own decisions. Cas feared a bit of power would corrupt him again. “Cas, no. You always wanted what’s best for heaven. Even if you made some mistakes along the way, Jack’s right, you are not that person, uh, angel, anymore, the fact that you’re worried about it, proves it”, “I don’t know if I’m making the right choices, teaching him the right things”, “You are, Cas, you are good and you want to do what’s right, and Jack’s the same way, that’s why he chose you in the first place”. Cas lifted his head and looked at him, he’d never seen the angel so human, he had the impulse to hug him but settled for some pats on the back. “Thank you, Dean”, he said and left.
#supernatural#jackles#misha#dean winchester#deancas#jensen ackles#jack kline#castiel#misha collins#destiel#fanfic
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The Crossover Nobody Asked For (VenturianTale and Milo Murphy’s Law)
“Oh, this place is horrid,” Cavendish says, looking out the window as the van rolls into town. “This is barely an upgrade from garbage duty.”
“So there’s a lot of damage. Maybe they’ve just a Murphy in town and no budget,” Dakota says with a shrug.
“... I suppose that’s a possibility. But I don’t believe Milo has mentioned any family living in North Carolina. Especially not a place with a name like... ugh.”
“Come on, say it,” Dakota says, already almost laughing.
“... Butts, Little Butts,” Cavendish sighs.
Dakota laughs, slapping the steering wheel.
“Who even named this place?! And who would live here-”
“WHOA!”
Dakota slams on the breaks as someone runs right out in front of the van.
“It went this way! Come on, Johnny!” a short man in a gray hoodie shouts behind him.
A tall man in a rather fancy outfit jogs into view. “I’m coming, sir! But I-I’ve been stabbed in the leg-”
“IT’S GETTING AWAY- oh, you!”
The short man runs up to the window of Cavendish and Dakota’s van. “Hey! Give us your vehicle!”
Cavendish is slightly taken aback. “Wh- we most certainly shall not!”
“Oh, he’s British! Johnny, come communicate with him in your British tongue!”
“What the devil-”
“Hello, there. I’m Johnny Toast. May we please use you vehicle?”
“More British, Johnny.”
“Oh, right sir, um, tea and crumpets, may we use your vehicle, um, Doctor Who, ah, my grandmother is the Queen of England.”
“... Just drive, Dakota.”
Dakota waves at the two men, and drives away. They hear the short one scream in frustration.
“This town is deplorable,” Cavendish says.
“We’ve only met two people, maybe it’s not so bad,” Dakota points out. “And we haven’t even been to any restaurants yet.”
“Given the state of some of these buildings, I advise against eating anything from here.”
“When has that ever stopped me?”
“Mmm, true.”
They finally arrive at their destination. A shockingly normal looking house, out in the suburbs.
“Well, perhaps this won’t be so bad after all.” Cavendish seems hopeful as the van is parked.
“Yeah, see? We just happened to run across two weirdos. Now let’s find that alien signal Mr. Block sent us here for.”
“I’ll grab the scanner, you introduce us,” Cavendish says, opening the back of the van.
Dakota nod sand heads up to the front door. He rings the doorbell, and waits.
“GERTRUDE! SOMEONE’S AT THE DOOR!”
“I HEARD IT, I’M MAKIN’ DINNER!��
“KIDS!”
Dakota winces. Oh boy, so the people who live here are... loud, to say the least.
“WHERE’RE THE KIDS, GERTRUDE?”
“BILLY IS HIDING FROM MADDIE AND SALLY IS ON A DATE WITH SLENDER! SUE IS SOMEWHERE IN THE MALL!”
Dakota waits a moment, and then rings again.
He hears a heavy sigh. A moment later, the door swings open, and Dakota shouts and stumbles back.
A large man stands in the door, holding a shotgun. With his bald head, beard, and very angry expression, he looks like exactly the type of person you don’t want to bother in the middle of the day.
“Who the heck ‘re you?” he demands in... some kind of... southern? accent.
“Uh...”
“Dakota, have you- oh, hello, are you the resident who lives here?”
Cavendish is either ignoring the shotgun, or hasn’t noticed it yet, somehow.
“Yeah, this is my house, so what’re you doing here?”
“Well, we’ve been sent by an agency-”
“Are you some more of them P.I.E people? I told ya to quit comin’ to my house, you only make the problems worse!”
“P.I.E? No, we’re with an agency called P.I.G-”
“Paranormal Investigators Gourmet?! I don’t remember hirin’ you!”
“... Gourmet- no! No, we’re with the Paranormal Investigation Group-”
“How many ghost huntin’ groups are there?!” the man shouts, presumably in frustration, though a slight bit of laugh slips into his voice.
“... We deal with aliens,” Cavendish says, unsure what else to say.
“Aliens? I KNEW IT! GERTRUDE, I TOLD YA! I TOLD YA THAT THING WAS FROM THEM ALIENS!”
“GOOD JOB, HONEY, YOU DID IT!”
“YEAH! I DID IT, I DID IT!Aw, you can come right on in, provin’ me right. You’re a lot less annoyin’ than the P.I.E people, they’re always talkin’ and sayin’ I’m wrong and not to shoot the ghosts, but they shoot ghosts too so I don’t know what they’re talkin’ about-”
“He’s just talking to himself now,” Dakota whispers to Cav as they follow the man into the house.
Cavendish nods. Maybe this won’t go as well as he’d hoped... He clears his throat. “May we ask for you name, my good man?”
The man stops, and turns around. “My name! Is PAPA ACACHALLA!”
Dakota snorts.
“Why’re you laughin? That’s my name! It’s a great name! Means ‘whole dang universe’!”
“No, no, it’s just I never thought we’d find a more made-up sounding name than his,” Dakota says, pointing his thumb at Cavendish.
“I beg your pardon?!”
“Well, what’s his name?” Acachalla demands, pointing at Cavendish with the shotgun way too casually.
Dakota pushes the barrel of the gun away. “Go ahead, Cav.”
Cav crosses his arms. “Balthazar Cavendish.”
"HA! You British people have the weirdest names! Like that Toast boy! Anyway, the alien thing is out here. Officer Maloney came to look at it, but it isn’t one of his things, and I can’t figure out how to move it! I’ve tried C4, a tractor, Freddie, a nuke-”
“A nuke?!”
“- an’ none of it even dented the thing!”
“Yeah, can we go back to nuke?” Dakota says, eyes wide.
“Too late, we’re here.”
Dakota and Cavendish blink.
Cavendish’s eye twitches “It’s a-”
“It’s a giant metal Kirby,” Dakota finishes.
“Yeah! I don’t want it in my yard! My daughter says it feels like it’s mockin’ her from when she was a Kirby!”
“What in blazes are you- this is no alien technology! This is some kind of... bad sculpture!” Cavendish shouts.
“It dropped right out of the sky!” Acachalla protests. “Maloney said it was alien, and he would know! He’s a bird!”
“A bir- you said he was a police officer!”
“He is! And he’s a bird! Who can be a person!”
Cavendish is fuming. “Dakota, call Mr. Block and tell him we’ve been lead on a wild goose chase!”
Dakota sighs, and heads inside to make the call (for some reason, he can’t get a signal from the yard).
“There’s no wild goose around here! Not after that nuke test, anyway!”
“There’s no possible way you set off a nuke here! This house is still intact, you’re still alive, and there’s no residual radiation in the area!”
“So?”
“SO?! SO THERE WAS NO NUCLEAR EXPLOSION!”
“I don’t think you know how nukes work!”
“YOU-”
“Cav, calm down, he’s holding a gun,” Dakota says in a hissed whisper.
Cavendish takes a deep breath, and collects himself. “Clearly, Mr. Acachalla-”
“Papa Acachalla. My title is Papa.”
“I steadfastly refuse to refer to you as ‘Papa’. Mr. Acachalla, there’s been some sort of mix-up, and this is not alien in-”
The mouth of the Kirby opens, and a being steps out.
“Excuse me, but our craft was broken, and we just got the doors working,” says the being (that looks... weirdly like a... Pokemon?).
“I KNEW IT!” Acachalla shouts. He shoots his gun up into the air, and starts ‘dancing’ (to use the term loosely). “I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT, PAPA ACACHALLA, I KNEW IT-”
Cavendish stares, dumbfounded. “You- you’re actually an alien?”
The alien nods. “Yup, I am!”
“... You sound remarkably human.”
“Thanks! So do you!”
“... Thank you?”
“Do you happen to know where we can get some materials to repair our ship?”
“Well, I suppose I might. What do you need?”
“Macaroni.”
“... What-”
“Hey, we’ve got that!” Acachalla says, stopping his little song and dance. “Just don’t tell the cops. It’s Johnny Toast brand, too, really strong stuff.”
“... Why would macaroni need to be hidden from the cops?” Cavendish asks weakly, shoulders slumped. This is ridiculous, and he feels... defeated, in a way.
“Uh, ‘cause it’s illegal?” Acachalla says with a laugh. “Duh?”
Acachalla leads the alien inside, and-
“WHY’RE YOU EATIN’ OUR MACARONI?!”
Dakota looks up from his bowl. “Uh, your wife offered me some-”
“GERTRUDE, WHAT’RE YOU THINKIN’?! THAT’S OUR GOOD MACARONI!”
A woman in a green sweater peeks out from the kitchen. “Well, he said he was hungry, and it was either this or your old boot!”
“That boot is high in protein!”
“That’s why I’m savin’ it for the kids!”
Dakota puts down his fork. “I think your macaroni went bad, actually, I don’t feel so good...”
Acachalla rolls his eyes. “Duh, you don’t! Have you ever even had macaroni before?!”
Dakota looks up. “Somethin’s weird here...” he slurs.
“Wh- what have you done to him?!” Cavendish pushes Acachalla aside and rushes to Dakota.
“It’s macaroni! It makes the world all wiggly and weird!” Acachalla says, like that’s at all true and common knowledge.
Dakota laughs a little, reaching up to grab Cavendish’s hat. “You’re way taller th’n I remember,” he says, still slurring.
“That is it! We are leaving!”
Cavendish picks Dakota up bridal-style. Dakota grins, and leans up, giving Cavendish a peck on the lips. “Wow, I can stretch really far...”
Cavendish blushes intensely. “That macaroni has clearly intoxicated my partner! You’ll be hearing from the higher-ups over this!” he says, trying to ignore what just happened.
“I think ‘m flying,” Dakota declares as Cavendish carries him back out to the van.
“Dakota, you’re delirious. Just rest until we get home.”
“I feel fine,” Dakota insists, head lolling. “You’re the one who turned into a tomato when I kissed you. From a leek to a tomato...”
“A leek? Is that because of my suit?”
“You’re a-a leek with fluffy wings.”
Cavendish buckles Dakota in. “What on Earth-”
“Like a vegetable angel.”
Cavendish blushes again. “This is terrible. you have no idea what you’re saying,” he says, trying to affirm that fact in his mind.
“You’re a tomato again. Whoa, my hand is made of fresh fries...”
“No, they’re just yellow because they’re covered in cheese.”
Dakota grins. “Smarty-pants.”
As Cavendish goes to shut the door, Dakota grabs him again and gives him another kiss. A long one. Cavendish is in shock.
“You don’t taste like a leek,” Dakota says afterwards, apparently incredibly happy about that fact.
Cavendish, blushing more than he thought was possible, gets in the driver’s seat and starts the car. “We’re never returning here,” he mutters to himself.
Dakota waves at the house as they drive away.
#VenturianTale#milo murphy's law#Dakavendish#Vinnie Dakota#balthazar cavendish#papa acachalla#Johnny Ghost#Johnny Toast#drugs tw#drugs mention#intoxication tw#hallucination tw#fanfic#my attempts at fanfic
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DESTIEL FIC REC
Okay, so, fanfiction is something that has brought me so much joy, entertainment and comfort during these hard times. These are the Destiel fics that I have bookmarked and would suggest for everyone to read. They are top notch in every department and I’ve read each and every multiple times. I wrote them down from the lowest word count to the highest and I linked the authors to their tumblr accounts, whenever I could find them, so please go shower them with love!
Touchstone - by xylodemon - Words: 3,519 - Summary: "You're in pain," Cas says finally. He sounds sad. (Episode tag for 11x03, the one where Dean is hurt but doesn’t think he deserves Cas healing him. Cas disagrees and makes heals him in loveliest, most tender way. Everything is beautiful.)
Colette - by englandwouldfall - Words: 4,218 - Summary: Cain’s prediction keeps ringing in his ears. He’s going to kill Crowley, then Cas, then Sam. It makes sense to him. He hates how much sense it makes, but there’s something almost poetic about it; it’s circular, neat, the Mark wants it. The Mark wants to destroy everything, but most of all it wants to destroy Dean. And that would do it. (Episode tag 10x14, Dean struggling with the Mark, unable to deal with all the anger and urge to kill and Cas trying to be his savior Collette. Feelings are acknowledged but things are far more complicated than that.)
Newton’s Third - by felolle - Words: 6,220 - Summary: “How can I be running from something when I’m racing toward it?” “I dunno -- kinda your thing.” Thanks for the call out, little brother (Episode tag 14x03, Cas helping Dean deal with Michael possession. Awesome character portrayal!)
Take me home tonight - by persephoneshadow - Words: 8,111 - Summary: The one where Cas wants to have sex and Dean is there to help (It’s a PWP where it takes some jealousy for Dean to get his head out of his ass - and Cas knows exactly what he’s doing)
Boys on film - by loversantiquities - Words: 8,540 - Summary: But maybe that’s what it is—maybe Castiel’s finally realized something Dean is too chicken to admit, despite the fact he’s been jerking off to the idea of Castiel fucking him for the past few weeks. The idea warms him as much as it pains him to think about, his friend not being able to talk to him about something like that. That has to be it—it’s the only explanation. Castiel likes him.“Or maybe he knows you do cam shows.”Dean chokes on his burger. (Basically Dean does cam-shows, Cas knows. They get it on in the end.)
Cuckoo and Nest - by komodobits - Words: 10, 190 - Summary: For a long time, Castiel thought that every earthly possession other than the immediately necessary was excess to requirement. But Dean – Dean who named his car, who keeps a photograph of his mother in his wallet, some thirty-plus years after her death, who still has the crumpled ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign with a sleeping pelican emblazoned on it from the Microtel outside of Roanoke where he first kissed Castiel, clumsy and unsure, under the unsteady fluorescence of an exhausted bathroom bulb – is sentimental.It puzzles Castiel, where Dean draws the line between what is meaningful and what it is worthless. (Boys walking on eggshells around each other, Castiel mistaking Dean’s neatness for annoyance about Cas’s lack of thereof, Dean mistaking Cas’s apprehension for having one foot out of the door. Miscommunication that gets resolved. It’s delightful!)
Just turn around and go - by Porcupinegirl - Words: 11,320 - Summary: Dean should be happy. His best friend and housemate of five years, Castiel, is moving out to live with his boyfriend, Balthazar. Dean's career is going great, so he can easily afford the house on his own now. This is just growing up, moving forward to the next phase of their lives.It would be awesome, if he weren't in love with Cas. (Some angst and miscommunication among roomies who are in love but needed a little push to finally do something about it, and that push is Cas deciding to move out and live with his actual boyfriend. Things work out just fine.)
So glad we made it - by annie d (scaramouche) - Words: 16,421 - Summary: At twelve years old, Dean makes a friend, who becomes his best friend, who will eventually become the love of his life. (Destiel fic in which they know each other since childhood and take their sweet-ass time with admitting to each other that they’re otp: meant to be. But it happens. Timeline of little snippets that show them falling in love and owning that shit up, at last!)
I know who I want to take me home- by annodominique - Words: 17,548 - Summary: The one where Dean and Cas are new workmates who hate each other's guts, are somehow forced into driving each other crazy because they secretly want to fuck, and they might have fallen in love with each other in the process. (Lots of sexual tension, mutual pining and enemies to lovers storyline - all in a nursing home. It’s amazing and absolutely heartwarming.)
Welcome to humanity - by winnywriter - Words: 19,944 - Summary: Castiel is falling, slowly but surely becoming fully human. Every day there is something new to discover, and many of those discoveries are not wholly pleasant ones. And the whole time, Dean can't help but worry about the fact that the further the angel falls, the more he finds he likes the human Cas is becoming. (It’s exactly what the summary says it is. Moments of Castiel slowly becoming human and Dean trying to help him navigate that path while navigating it himself in the most Dean way possible)
On air - by wincechesters - Words: 21,219 - Summary: Cas and Dean are radio DJs who host the second most popular morning show in Lawrence. They’ve been co-hosts for years at different stations across the country, and they own a house together out of necessity, even though they’re just friends. But for some reason, a lot of their listeners and even some of their friends and family seem to think that they’re secretly in some kind of relationship, which they’re totally not (besides that one time that totally doesn’t count). In spite of that, Dean thinks he’s got everything figured out, until an ill-fated on air game of Truth or Dare turns everything upside down (and the billboards around town aren’t helping either). (Friends to lovers story that’s very well summarized, so I have nothing to add except that it’s such a wonderful read, this author is absolutely amazing and you should definitely read it.)
The Beach House in the Winter - by englandwouldfall - Words: 23,715 - Summary: They're not exactly in a good place right now, so it was probably a bad idea to agree to a full Milton family reunion at their old summer haunt to mark a year since Cas' father died.Obviously, he did it anyway. (This is a second part of a series, I absolutely suggest reading all of the works ‘cause they’re equally wonderful, but I read this one first and individually and loved it the most so I’m suggesting it. Look at tag warnings. It’s about Dean having panic attacks mid sex due to trauma, Castiel trying to treat him right and handle the situation properly. They love each other so much ugh)
There are many things - by imogenbynight - Words: 28,807 - Summary: In which Dean and Castiel learn, through trial and error, how to be together. (What starts out as an angsty fic that follows Cas’s human experience after Dean kicked him out of the bunker, turns into a Destiel falling in love fic as they find their way back to one another)
Sometimes it fits - by ballsdeepinwinchesters - Words: 37,720 - Summary: Castiel is an over-worked, socially awkward neurosurgeon; Dean is the ruggedly handsome paramedic that asks him out for drinks. The rest kind of fell into place. (Two hotties with busy work schedules having lots of sex and being domestic. It’s a lot of fluff and smut. No angst.)
Put up your dukes - by saltyfeathers - Words: 38, 282 - Summary: Dean can't sleep. Cas offers to tire him out. (Dean struggling to accept the sexual tension relief Castiel is oh-so-eager to offer. So much tension, sparring goodness and bed sharing.)
All’s well that ends well - englandwouldfall - Words: 52,326 - Summary: Dean knew the second he took off that he shouldn't have left, but that didn't mean he could have guessed what he'd be coming back home to. (It’s actually a part 4 of the series, and I do suggest reading the entire series, but I read it first and individually before even realizing this and I absolutely loved it nonetheless. It’s about both Dean and Cas having made some poor choices in the past, abandonment and infidelity and two of them loving each other so much that they’re willing to forgive and fight for each other no matter what. Angsty and beautiful.)
A midterms night’s dream - by englandwouldfall - Words: 75,756 - Summary: There's at least fifteen good reasons why they're not sleeping together, it's just that Dean can’t remember them when Cas sends him one second dirty snapchats to goad him into doing the dishes. (One of my absolutely favorite fics and one of my top 3 fic authors (does a lot of series, which gets you really emotionally invested!). I suggest you read literally every single Destiel story written by this author, ‘cause it’s consistent in character portrayal and in invoking emotional response and I’ll probably explicitly write down at least one more story that I particularly liked from them. This one’s about them being college roomates who’re basically oblivious to sharing sentiment of wanting to be in relationship with the other, so they pine emotionally while having exceptional we-are-strictly-fuck-buddies sex)
Version 2.0 - by elizabeth1985 - Words: 75,937 - Summary: Life is nothing but a series of processes. We rise, we work, we function within the walls we’ve designed for ourselves. Dean Winchester does not deviate from this system. Heavily tattooed and a certified genius; Dean necessitates control. Relationships are a no-go. Too messy, unpredictable. And yeah, he knows having casual sex with his best friend, roommate, and business partner is a dumbass move. But Cas’ suggestion is impossible to resist.What Dean doesn’t expect and couldn’t possibly predict is the unique way Cas manages to shut down his mile-a-minute mind, giving him a level of inner peace he’d thought to be unattainable.What starts out of convenience morphs into a dynamic emotional slide neither of them were prepared for, forcing them to decide what they’re willing to risk. (Cas and Dean being business partners turning to fuck buddies turning to mutually pining idiots, where Cas won’t let things progress further ‘cause Dean is so entwined in every single aspect of his life that he’s absolutely terrified to lose it all. But Dean makes an effort to show him otherwise!) + It’s hard to fool around in a tent (Words: 5,861)
Any little heartbreak - by followthattardis - Words: 76,897 - Summary: Dean Winchester knows everything there is to know about the human heart. Well. Anatomically speaking. (Very Grey’s Anatomy-y, Dean is a thriving cardiosurgeon, Cas is his new surgical nurse assistant, there are so many well written characters, so much gossip, gratuitous sex and eventually a relationship. It’s so lovely, ugh I love this writer.)
A crash course in computer safety - by followthattardis - Words: 85,269 - Summary: On the day of his 29th birthday, Dean receives an email from his old nemesis: Michael Milton, the guy who got him kicked out of college and stole his girlfriend. The email contains encoded images with top secret CIA/NSA intelligence – and now their only copy is in Dean’s brain. Both agencies send their best operatives – Castiel Novak and Victor Henriksen respectively – to handle their accidental asset and protect the invaluable data in his head. To justify their sudden appearance in Dean’s life, they adopt covers: Victor as Dean’s new co-worker and neighbor, Cas as his new boyfriend. Needless to say, Dean’s brother and his girlfriend are thrilled to see him in a relationship they believe to be real. Clearly, there’s no way this could go wrong. (This is a NBC: Chuck AU and one of my top 3 fics ever. I haven’t watched Chuck at all and regardless of whether you have or not, I don’t wanna write anything else in this section ‘cause I enjoyed discovering every bit of information on my own. I’ve literally taken this fic and studied/analyzed it as a writer myself to take pointers on accurate character portrayal and writing style. It’s book material, I’d literally buy anything this author writes. It’s becoming a series and more content is to come so I suggest subscribing.) + Curtain up (Words: 10,311)
La hantise (The only work in progress fic here) - by quiettewandering - Words: 87,468 - Summary: Castiel’s mother dies, leaving him the family home that sits abandoned on the moody coast of Maine. He’s forced to return to the past ghosts of his trauma, as well as meeting the mysterious and nomadic Dean Winchester. Dean offers to help Castiel fix up the house so he can sell it, which quickly becomes problematic as Castiel begins to develop feelings for Dean; especially when details of Dean’s troubling past come to light.This is a story about the sea, second chances, and two broken, forgotten people building a love between them while restoring a broken, forgotten house. (Romance, ghosts, house renovation, cliffhangers, angst - I am awful with WP’s, never read them till they’re done ‘cause I’m an impatient one but this is the one I couldn’t resist and thoroughly enjoy)
Ignore the butterflies: best friend advice from Dean Winchester - by impatient14 - Words: 114,837 - Summary: Dean likes his doctor, but his doctor doesn’t like him.Accidental friendship ensues, heartwarming bonding type moments occur, and oops!friends become best!friends.But best friends aren’t supposed to feel the way Dean feels about Castiel. He knows this. So he ignores all the things that he can’t help feeling. When he sits and watches a movie with his best friend or when they are arguing about which method of coffee brewing is best, he pointedly doesn’t look at his friends lips, or the adorable way he tilts his head when he doesn’t understand.Dean ignores his feelings.That’s the way he knows how to keep his best friend.Just ignore the butterflies. (Dean is a heroic firefighter who ends up in stand-offish Castiel’s ER and flirts mercilessly with him, but to no avail. Cas is not made of stone, though, he’s just trying to protect his little heart ‘cause Dean does scary heroic things. It’s super emotional, go read it.)
Keeping you in sight - by gingerswag - Words: 136,374 - Summary: Castiel valued his solitude, and was happy to stay hidden away in the mountains for the rest of his life. But when his seeing eye dog dies, that solitude is suddenly broken when Gabriel shows up not with another dog but an actual human slave. Castiel doesn't believe in slavery, but he can't turn away the very hurt and broken man he's given. (This is a slavery fic, look up the tag warnings! It’s extremely angsty, it has a very human and rational ending which not might satisfy those looking for a conclusive, expressed fairytale ending for these two. It’s about Dean having gone through a lot of trauma and Cas being extremely lonely and two of them trying to mend each other while going through an excruciatingly painful healing process. I don’t think I can summarize it in a way that envelops everything that happens in this fic - it’s a tougher read but absolutely wonderfully written and very angsty)
Stay with me, sweetheart - by mandalarose - Words: 142,926 - Summary: A single moment's distraction ends with a serious car accident that leaves Castiel trapped in his vehicle. Fortunately for him, fire fighter Dean Winchester is there, never leaving Castiel's side as the rest of his company work to free him from the mangled remains of his SUV.When the two meet again in the ICU, Castiel finds himself just as drawn to and comforted by the handsome fireman as he was during his accident. Dean is certainly attractive, but single father Castiel doesn't have time or space in his life for a romantic relationship.Then again, there's no harm in making a new friend, is there? (Dean is so whipped, so is Cas but he tries really hard not to get invested ‘cause everyone leaves and it’s not a commodity he can afford now that he’s got a baby. Thankfully for him, Dean is all-in kind of guy who’s gonna make all the right choices, one after another, fighting to show Cas that he can have what he desires and deserves, even after multiple attempts of Cas’s to push him away. Love conquers all!)
Four Letter Word for Intercourse - by bendingsignpost - Words: 194,739 - Summary: As a grease monkey turned college freshman, Dean's constantly three seconds away from being stressed out of his mind. It hardly helps that he's finally figuring out his sexuality in his thirties.What might help with that stress is a little phone number (and a big credit card bill). If he can't figure out how to be bisexual in person, he can at least give it a go over the phone, right? (I think I probably read this story a hundred times. Fantastically written fic where Dean is a student discovering his sexuality through a phone sex line, struggling with having to take over family business and Cas is a professor with a sidejob, with whom Dean interacts wordlessly at the library. It tackles on mental health, on wonderful sex dynamics, coming out and lots of other stuff. It’s one of the best writen fics out there, along with the other works in this series that I highly suggest to read: A Little Anal - Words: 18,805 and What makes a man kneel - Words: 9,920)
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Damn.
Let me start off by saying, there’s nothing that could have happened in this ending that could change my love for this show. I think people that say shows are utterly ruined by unsatisfying endings are people who don’t have fandom to fix things. I’m a Game of Thrones fan. I’m a Magicians fan. The ending? That’s a starting point, my dudes. Fandom can fix anything.
First off, I loved the retrospective. For a hot second, I thought about watching that after the finale, but I wanted to watch it the way it was meant to be watched, and I’m glad I made that decision.
Seeing the callbacks to the classic meta episodes and the characters we loved and lost along the way was a comfort. I wish we’d gotten a Crowley cameo in the final season, but seeing a tribute to Crowley and Mark Sheppard in this episode was awesome.
Then the finale.
This isn’t the ending I wanted for the boys. I’ve shipped Destiel since he strolled into Dean’s life in season four and sparks LITERALLY flew, and I was a clown to the last because I really REALLY thought Dabb and the showrunners were going to give it to us.
I didn’t want this end for Dean. Sure, he was happy in heaven, but I feel like this ending served to undo fifteen years of character development.
Dean spent his entire life full of self-loathing because his father forced him to structure his entire identity around being a hunter since he was a child. Dean feels worthless outside the hunt. He’s “daddy’s blunt instrument.” He’s a weapon. He’s a broken thing that can’t be saved or loved or forgiven. But in 15x18 we finally FINALLY had Cas, a character who has seen into Dean’s soul LITERALLY, who saw every bit of trauma and self-hatred in him who looked him in the eye and said, “that’s not who you are. You’re worthy of love. And I love you.”
And then the Empty took Cas.
And then Dean died. On one of John’s unfinished hunts.
It ends bloody, or it ends sad.
It ended both.
Sam lived a life without his brother. We got a kid named Dean and a vague female shaped blur as the wife. I AM fully pissed that we didn’t get Eileen as Sam’s wife. Even if Shoshannah Stern couldn’t film due to COVID it would have been very very easy to establish her as his wife with a few photographs. Bringing back a fan favorite and setting her up as Sam’s endgame only to back out at the last minute feels like a cop out.
And Dean? He got his endless road, driving Baby until Sam showed up. Switching the license plate back to the KAZ 2Y5 of the early seasons was a nice callback, but I still feel like Dean deserved more.
That illusory future that Chuck showed Sam before it all went bad - Sam and Eileen, Dean and Cas, movie nights in the bunker - that’s what I wanted for them.
It ends bloody, or it ends sad.
Nothing will change my love for this show.
I can picture every detail of my living room in Freeport when I watched the first episode 15 years ago. I remember talking about episodes with my Mom, arguing over which brother was the superior Winchester. I was a Dean girl from day one, while she liked Sam best. I remember the last episode we watched together, 4x06 -Yellow Fever. Not a great episode, though Dean inflicted with ghost sickness had its hilarious moments.
Sam’s words to Dean in their last moments - “You can go now.” I whispered those same words to my Mom on that last day, when cancer had left her little more than a shell of who she’d once been. I’d been crying since the episode started, but when Sam said those words it turned into the type of heaving breathless sobs that I hadn’t cried in years.
I remember burying myself even deeper in fandom after she died, losing myself in the world of angels and demons, where a deal at a crossroads could bring anyone back.
Supernatural was what got me through the darkest of days. It was a friend I met in fandom who gave me something to live for. It was season four and fanfic and fanvids that kept me alive long enough for my wounds to knit themselves into some approximation of healed flesh so that I was strong enough to run away to Texas and carve a future here.
That’s the legacy that show has for me. If you didn’t meet me in high school or college (or William Arthur), you know me because of Supernatural. Full stop.
I never would have ended up in Texas if not for that fandom friend. Never would have met my husband or the amazing friends I have here. Wouldn’t have the career and the entire LIFE I’ve built. Remembering how lost and broken I was back then, I can’t say for sure I’d even be alive now if I hadn’t had the life raft of fandom to cling to.
This show. This flawed, messy, imperfect show. I am not happy with the ending. I wanted so much more for the boys. I wanted happiness that didn’t require death. I wanted Dean to have a chance to be happy with someone who really loved him.
Does it change how I feel about the show? Not in the slightest. We killed Chuck. Worse, we neutered him. The story doesn’t belong to The Powers That Be anymore. It’s ours.
Dean. Sam. Cas. Jack. Bobby. Charlie. Crowley. Rowena. Ellen. Jo. Gabriel. Jody. Donna. Claire. Kevin. Lucifer. Balthazar. Ketch. John. Mary.
They all belong to us now.
Fifteen years. 327 episodes.
I love you Supernatural.
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