#i’m way too emotionally invested in these fictional characters and i have no intention of changing that

[anidealistatbestburntoutatworst]

dazai *briefing atsushi for a mission with the port mafia*: “you’re going to catch the target?”

atsushi: “yeah!”

dazai *continuing*: “… and bring them in for questioning?”

atsushi: “yep!”

dazai *teasingly*: “ and maybe kiss akutagwa?!”

atsushi *with no hesitation*: “YEAH YEAH!!”

dazai: “woahhh atsushi,,, kissing your partner on a mission… how forward of you- i mean if that’s what you’re into…”

atsushi *embarrassed/blushing*: “noo dazai it’s not- it’s not like that-“

dazai: “oh please, it’s not like chuuya and i haven’t kissed on a mission or two!”

[bluedalahorse]

Anon, if you are defending Sara with your life, know that I am right behind you. You have my sword, my bow, AND my axe.

I think a lot of people view Sara’s actions with the full knowledge of everything going on in the show, and tend to be surprised when Sara reacts to things in a way is different from how they (the members of the audience) would react. One of the obvious examples of this is that (fictional character) Sara, as Simon’s sibling, is probably going to react differently to Simon being in love with Wilhelm than a (IRL person) fan is when they’re shipping Wilmon as a pairing. As fans, we embrace Simon’s love for Wilhelm wholeheartedly, whereas Sara—while initially happy for her brother when she realizes he has a crush—isn’t going to be invested in the Wilmon relationship on the near-religious level that we as fans can sometimes be. She also has reason to be cautious about Wilhelm on her brother’s behalf; we as the audience have a lot of insight into Wilhelm and his good intentions, but Sara doesn’t.

Likewise, it’s easy for us as an audience to look at August and go, damn, that boy is trouble. But for Sara she’s a character in a show, who hasn’t seen every scene he’s in, shot from telling angles. She doesn’t have the hindsight we do or the music cues or lighting cues or anything, and she’s dealing with all the show’s information as she learns it, and the information just keeps coming. She’s probably like… “Hm, August seems to feel bad about what he’s done. But he also says he needs me? Oh no he’s panicking. I think I’m getting through to him… or maybe I’m not… or maybe I am… whoops got distracted by his eyes there. Whoops, had sex about it. Maybe I should just give up and because everyone will hate me for this… or maybe… okay, how long should I give August to do the right thing? Should I give August an extension on doing the right thing because he seems to be under a lot of pressure from the palace right now? Does it even matter to Simon anymore? Maybe it doesn’t matter to Simon, he’s with Marcus now… Wait what, king? Wait, should I address the fact that August is taking unprescribed ADHD medication first? He says he’ll stop soon… but that’s what Dad said… now I’m worried…” And so on and so forth. People should think about any time when they were young that they sat on a secret too long (usually a secret you should have told an adult sooner) because of a crush or a best friend you cared about very much. That’s where Sara is, emotionally. Sara doesn’t vocalize all this in a literal, obvious way, but it comes out in other ways. We see her body language where she’s deciding whether to go to the dance with August or her friends. We see the way she sort of projects the idea that she can save August onto the idea of saving Rousseau. I think there’s a lot going on beneath the surface if you let yourself acknowledge that Sara has a rich interior world. She’s more conflicted than people give her credit for.

I know what you mean about fandom’s tendency to bash female characters, too. I’ve been in fandoms since the late 90s and my first fandom was Gundam Wing and… it was… not good about that kind of thing. Fortunately I’ve seen more posts lately where people are being reflective about the general Sara conversations. Of course it would always be nice to see more. So I guess I’m modeling what I’d like to see in the world and starting here!

(You can always message me about Sara if you want, anon. She’s my absolute favorite!)

none of the characters are 100% evil. they're all so complex. kristina, august, and sara especially. they're not good people, of course, but they're very interesting characters and aren't so black and white.

though, i do have to say...the way sara gets more hate than august is quite surprising. is it misogyny? possibly. i remember seeing so many posts about that -- a male character does something horrible, and people sympathize with him, whereas when a female character does something similar, everyone wants her dead. but we all know how fandoms get when you point out sexism in their community, so i'll shut up now 🤷‍♀️ maybe i'm just an annoying lesbian

(just know that i will defend sara with my life)

[kazewhara]

I DIDNT MEAN IT IN A MEAN WAY /genuine intention. I understand I made it sound it like “who is he”. I meant more like “who’s Aether to you?”. That would’ve been a better way to ask. I mostly read Kazuha fan fiction and I just wanted to hear your reasonings for liking Aether. I follow you because I like your writings and respect your opinions so that’s why I wanted to ask :D. I’m sorry for making it sound like Aether hate or something :( I really didn’t mean it how it seemed.

oh! well, firstly you don't have to apologize! i didn't interpret it as hate, i just thought you legitimately had no idea who he was, which made me question how you even made it here #(@;#&#;# you're all good, bby!

second! if you want the truth as to why i became interested in aether... it was gender envy. THE WORSTTT KIND OF GENDER ENVY, the kind that makes you wanna SCREAM LMDMSNDD but the reason why i stayed interested was because when i did some digging and found out that he and lumine had the sun/moon, summer/winter dynamic going on, i kinda latched onto him.. and the way that mihoyo is giving us character development -- the way they're showing how the traveler is steadily becoming more and more calloused and focused on their goal... that made me want to love this sunshine boy who just wants to go home, y'know? i think the same can be said for a lot of other people;;

but abyss prince aether is so... the sun/moon dynamic still holds up even with this, because i think aether is so emotionally invested in this and he's hurting.. he's probably in so much pain -- he just wants this to end so he can be with lumine again, but this war means far too much for him to back out..

all in all, i think aether has a heart that is far too big for his body and he's paying the price for it. doesn't matter if he's the abyss prince or the traveler.

but yeah that's me :D

[c-is-for-circinate]

Ok, Hades gameplay reaction time!

(Because I have been terrible this quarantine year about posting thoughts about stories I've been invested in, and I'm really enjoying this game, and I'm playing basically blind and I have theories, and what is tumblr for if not recording those things to look back on later.)

I love this specific kind of fantasy/speculative fiction, that straddles the line between 'allegory clearly designed to explore a real-world issue' and 'the themes of this reflect real-world issues but also everything is times one million for drama and setting's sake'. I love it so much. Because, look, this is a story about a teenager/young adult trying to gather up the skills and resources and help he needs to escape his controlling, possessive, emotionally abusive father's house. That's it. Strip away all of the trappings, and that's what the story is about. By comparison, I think about Star Wars. (I love Star Wars too.) That's also a story about a dysfunctional fucked-up family dynamic. But that family is fucked up because dad went on a magic-corruption-induced killing spree, and his twin children were separated at birth to be raised in seclusion with the intention of someday taking him down, and look, that's cool, but it's definitely not how people actually are. All of the dysfunction in that family is an outgrowth of the fantastical setting, which means it is fantastical dysfunction. It can occasionally mirror or remind us of real-life interactions, but it's a fantasy. Which is great and fun to watch and very comforting and so on, but I don't necessarily want that in every story, and I love Hades because it is not that, at all. When you extend out the basic 'kid trying to escape his toxic home environment', Hades is the story of Zagreus trying to get out with the help of his dad's estranged, complicated, wealthy and powerful family, who are absolutely part of the reason why dad is Like That in the first place, and may not be any more reliable in the long run but who he needs right now. And his stepmom and teacher, who love him enough to help him leave, unconditionally and supportively (ask me how many feelings I have about 'look, Hades can't hurt me for helping you, don't worry about me, I am going to take care of you and that means helping you get out of this house' coming from an adult authority figure, ask me). And his dad's employees, who like him but also have to fear the old man's wrath, and walk that line in different places the best they can. And stepmom's long-estranged parent, because this is a story about families and how they split apart and come back together. And all of that is so real, so grounded in actual, concrete, this-is-how-humans-work family dynamics. But it's also individual. The story works so well because Hades isn't just a silhouette of the controlling asshole father; he is clearly The Way He Is for reasons, complicated ones, good and bad alike. The Way He Is has details, particularities, paperwork, a dog he pretends not to love and rely on. He is specific. Nyx and Achilles are specific, not just generic kind stepmom here to be a trope inversion and cardboard cutout teacher. Nyx has backstory and personality of her own, Achilles has a complex history, opinions, a missing lover, and they BOTH have very particular relationships with Hades that aren't just boilerplate script. Yes, there's abstraction there, you meet these characters in brief visual novel-esque three-line conversations over the course of dozens of escape runs, of course there's abstraction--but there's the very real sense that all of these people have nuance, have good and bad days, that they've made choices to be who they are, even if we don't know what those choices are yet. And, like Star Wars, some of the ways in which this story is so specific rely entirely on the fact of the otherworldly setting! I've seen stories that go the other way, that try to use their setting entirely as window dressing, and they end up feeling so flat I can't even remember them right now because they don't let the environment lend complexity and nuance to their characters at all. The environment these characters live in matters. The absolute control Hades exerts over his surroundings is a divine power. The fact that everyone Zag runs into, for or against him, is either immortal or immortally dead, changes how the react to

one another and to the situation at hand. The shape of his attempted escapes (gauntlet combat with a variety of legendary weapons) might be an allegorical construct of the genre, true, but it doesn't work in any sort of real-world setting where there exists the possibility of authority figures above or aside from Hades and his extended fucked-up family. That's part of why the family is so fucked-up in the first place. But these changes still fit well within the realm of, 'yeah, if you took this extremely real-life dynamic and added these factors to it, I can envision people doing this thing'. I can envision these specific people doing this thing. They add to the specificity of these characters. Letting them be influenced by their unreal surroundings makes them more real. So hell yes for good storytelling!!!!

I'm still relatively early in the game (by which I mean I'm like thirty runs in but only just got past Meg for the third time, because I am not good at this game, although in my defense it's only the seventh video game and second button-mashing game I have ever played in my life so there's that), but I'm starting to develop suspicions about Persephone. Because, look, outside of Persephone's absence from the underworld, this story knows its Greek mythology, uses it, revels in it. And there is some kind of mystery still shrouding Persephone leaving in the first place. She left a goodbye to Cerberus in her letter but not to her own son. Nyx has warned Zagreus multiple times not to let the Olympians know she's his mother. He literally never even knew she existed. That's complicated! Add to that, Persephone left--the exact thing we are trying and failing to do again and again and again. She left with one note, which means either she managed a one-shot speedrun out of the entire realm or she had some other way to leave, because if she'd washed up in the Styx pool to plod back to her room and try again, she wouldn't've needed to leave the note in the first place. And, you know, she's Persephone. Really quite famous for leaving the Underworld! Also quite famous for being forced back. So. I'm wondering if Zagreus, so conspicuously absent from her goodbye, has something to do with it after all. Six pomegranate seeds condemned Persephone to six months, half a year, half her life. I wonder if a child that's half of her her constitutes a fitting trade instead. Which, of course Hades would be even more resentful and dismissive and cruel to the kid he got in place of the wife he loved (who he chased away by being cold in the first place). Of course Persephone would have difficulty saying goodbye to her son in those circumstances. It would make sense. The tricky thing here is how the Olympians fit into it, because I also suspect the rift between Hades and Zeus sprang from Persephone's departure. And yet, if the Olympians never knew Zagreus existed, let alone that he's Persephone's son--how can he count as payment into the deal in their eyes? So in that case, what does Zeus think is the justification for Persephone leaving, after the pomegranate thing? Or are we just not doing the pomegranate thing at all? It would be a shame to lose it entirely, out of a story that really seems to enjoy the myths it's playing with. And there should be something complex here, something more than simply 'mom fucked off and left because dad sucked and now I'm following her because same'. It feels more complex than that. 'Mom and dad had a baby to try and save their marriage, it didn't work, but when mom left she had to leave me behind because otherwise dad would have gotten the cops and her extended family involved' feels more right, while still just as grounded in reality as the story has been so far.

I sort of want to write some meta about how each of the six legendary weapons corresponds to their original divine wielder, but I haven't unlocked all of their codex entries yet (look I am very bad with ranged weapons in this game ok, I am working on it), and I still need to think about the details. Aside from, of course, fuck yes of course Hestia's the one with the railgun. Leave drama and elegance and traditional weaponry to her brothers and sister (Demeter, who knows how to get her hands dirty, gets a pass). Hestia is out here to get shit done. With a grenade launcher.

[kuekyuuq]

At this point, I see things regarding Supercorp this way...

(Mxaybe... in another universe... *sighs*)

My head-canon for the show:

Lena had a crush on Kara since day one and vice versa. She tried to deny it, deny herself the ‘luxury’ of personal attachment... but Kara was quite persistent, and cute, and sweet, and warm, and such a dork, and... yeah... Lena got confused when she developed similar feelings for Supergirl, and then her disagreements with Supergirl caused her to not-like her anymore, but still felt physically attracted to her - damnit. Since oblivious Kara did not respond properly to her flirts (and they both verbally friend-zoned each other), Lena resigned to gaze and long for her in secret, thinking Kara was straight. Neither her short and tragic re-encounter with Jack - an unresolved comfort from her own past - nor her sudden enemies-to-lovers thing with James (Kara's ex of all people) could quite quench her craving for Kara's closeness and warmth or her verbal tension-filled jab-throwing matches with Supergirl. After the reveal, Lena was more hurt over her 'friend' betraying her trust, keeping a secret from her (yes, that's a double-standard, Lena! ...girl's got deeply rooted issues) than 'Supergirl' using her alter-ego to take advantage of Lena (which, hands down, Kara actually did on some occasions - so, ironically that one would have been objectively valid, but, hey, feelz shape our perspectives). She went through her lashing-out phase, only to realize she can't live without Kara in her life. And really wants to do good. Yes, that too... ...and it only took her trying to brainwash the whole world (good intentions and the road to hell) and Lex back-stabbing her a couple of times, to see the light and join the good guys for good... to be more like Supergirl, in her own small way...? Y'all know what I mean ^_- She came crawling back, continues to try hard to prove herself worthy, longingly watching on every time Kara and Alex hug, desperate to keep her sunshine-impersonated in her life, whom she truly loves, despite how much she tried to convince herself she did not...

...

Meantime, Kara is an alien (yes, I bold that, bc, people tend to not think this through). From a totally different culture and all, having suffered great trauma and entering Earth's culture during her puberty/informative years. A Kryptonian who crushed for Humans (males - James, Adam - and apparently 4 other dudes she broke the noses of when kissing) and other aliens (Daxamite Mon-El) ...uh, and even couldn't stop herself admitting how she likes how nice Lucy (female Human) smells (the most prominent other time such a statement was made, was when everybody was swooning over Kal). Who only in her adulthood realized homosexuality was even a real option, outside of high-schoolers slurring at each other. (And I am not saying, Kara is gay, as in lesbian... she incidentally spoke true when she denied that in the pilot. Repeat after me: “Kara is an alien.” ..I’d call her pan, but am also aware, that the textbook definition doesn’t include ‘all species’... so.... there’s that.) Kara, who so desperately hard tried to fit in, she got absolutely used to others telling her what she's supposed to feel and think.

...who crushed hard for Lena at first sight (possibly, also star-struck). But both Clark and Alex, her most important people to look for help, guidance and reference, told her any Luthor was bad news.

There was Mon-El, whom she didn't even like, at first. When he lied told her he wasn't in love with her, she was utterly relieved. She was all “Oh, golly. That’s unexpected and awkward. What now?!” when he confessed to her, and tried (and failed) to let him down gently. (I am actually convinced, that Kara was more ego-hurt, that he moved on to Eve so quickly, and.. where she and James ended things once Lucy was out of the picture, Kara only started thinking/feeling differently about Mon-El when he was taken... just sayin’ I maybe spot a pattern there.) But, Alex told her, that she had a thing for Mon-El and that she should give him a shot... ...even when Lena got involved with Cadmus, and Kara found herself passionately defending the youngest Luthor against ALL her friends, when she could not explain her bone-deep trust in Lena but by "I can see it in her eyes" and other instinctually tainted expressions... Well, she and Mon-El made it work, they were actually a sweet couple when they weren't butting heads... Didn't stop Kara from having mixed feelings when Lena ran into her ex. And yes, Kara did mourn Mon-El. If only for the concept of what they had together, but I do think, she did feel love for him... Me thinks, Kara would be one of the people who simply can not separate physical and emotional. So by kissing and sleeping with him, stronger emotional attachments came to be. Not to invalidate them, but... personal history is important.

....long story short, Kara kept trying not to stand out. Lived and loved on the safe-side, hurt one too many times by circumstance. And yet kept feeling drawn to Lena, kept trusting her, kept wanting to reveal herself to her - despite what everybody else said. But, emotionally and 'culturally' on the safe side.

Kara friend-zoned herself.

The reveal happened and... Lena HURT her and Kara STILL kept her hope and trust up... and while towards the end of it, being incredibly hurt and worn out, she still let Lena back in. And within 24h decided that Lena came through enough times and Kara was ready to accept her apology...

And then Lex happend (again) and Phantom Zone...

Now...

[*] My head-canon for RL:

Katie is such a natural flirt, that even though the SG writers (after introducing both Lena and Mon-El to the show) have been told "no gay Supergirl" by the CW in 2017, Melissa just never knows what hit her...

Director: "CUUUT!" Melissa: "--...wait, what? I'm married. I mean... huh?" Melissa: "Wait! We have to redo that! We were told, not to-" Katie: "To what?" Melissa: "...uh, the Supercorp-thing... you know... the heart-eyes?" Katie: "What heart-eyes?" *raises an eyebrow the typical Katie-way* Melissa: "...the... um.... you..." Katie: "Wait, did you-..?" Melissa: "Me!? Oh, no. I am married!" Katie: "What has that to do-... Are you okay?" Melissa: "Yes!" Katie: "Okay, then." *Katie swaggers off stage & hi5s one of the writers on her way out* Melissa: "...darn it." *calls Chris* "Honey, I love you." Chris: "...it happened again?" Melissa: "..." *Chris starts laughing* Melissa: "...so not funny."

So, yeah, that's where I am at. Kara friend-zoned herself and Lena is totally mush for the Girl of Steel. ...and Katie is just being Katie :)

Also, I am currently 99% sure Supercorp will not be endgame. But I would be 100% pleased to be proven wrong.

[* In all seriousness, do not bash on the actors, please. They are just doing their jobs, have a life and family, real relationships and feelings. So, my above 're-enactment' is completely fictional, purely for light-hearted entertainment and not meant to do any harm or spread any hate or to be actually transcribed onto the actual, real people. We do not really know these people! They - and the writers, too - do bring characters to life that we invest in - for that they deserve our gratitude. My gut feeling (or shipper-heart feeling?) is, they are doing their best to sneak Supercorp in whenever they can - not to bait, but because they may actually not be allowed (yet..?) to make SC text but see the same chemistry we do. Have fun, but be respectful, please! We can disagree with the CW's executive decisions - although, we do not really know what’s going on bts - and express our dismay, but do not in all seriousness spread hate.]

[otp-armada]

If Jason wanted to convince me that Lxa was the love of Clarke's life, he wouldn't have killed her off, effectively cutting their love story permanently, with 4.5 seasons left of the show. Their arc, starting with their introduction in 2x07 and concluding with L's death in 3x07, is 17 episodes long, accounting for 17% of the entire narrative. If I generously add 3x16 to the count, an episode in which L is already dead in the corporeal world Clarke is trying to return to, it's a whopping, grand total of 18%. An 18% congruous with Clarke's intense connection to Bellamy and vice versa, which even A.lycia confirmed as romantic. Feelings romantic enough to spur the formation of a love triangle. An 18% ignoring Clarke's ultimate choice to go back to her people when L wanted her to stay.

CL is a chapter in the story begun and wrapped up in the first half of the narrative. And that's omitting further illumination on the finer details making CL so problematic for Clarke. Do you expect me to believe it was coincidental for CL to occur at a time when Clarke was spiraling down a dark path, commencing with Finn's death? Who played a hand in forcing Clarke's own hand, with Finn, and TonDC, and Mount Weather? Whose example inspired her to ensnare herself in armor and warpaint to be strong enough to save her people? Whose behavior did she emulate in the pushing away of support from her people? Who gave her a place to continue hiding from Bellamy, her mom, and her friends? A place to be someone other than Clarke Griffin? In lieu of facing her fears like the heroine she is? The purpose of CL wasn't to provide Clarke with a magnificent, fairy tale romance gone tragically wrong. I believe Jason's intent with the relationship aimed to further damage Clarke's psyche after L's death, to solidify the belief that her love is not only deadly to its recipients but renders her too weak to do what must be done for survival.

After 3x16, CL is an often superfluous namedrop or two per season for Clarke to briefly react to before carrying on with the plot. Season 5 aside, most of these references are needless enough to be able to interpret them as attempts at reparations for the L/CL fandom's benefit -and their views- without altering the course of the story. Crazy me for thinking it's not enough to constitute an ongoing love story. Crazy me for not thinking this was on par with interactions between living characters. Crazy me for thinking it doesn't befit a love story for the protagonist.

This sliver of the story is what Jason and the CLs would have us unquestionably believe is the pervasive love story of The 100's seven seasons?

Despite his lie and the constant gaslighting from the pineapple CLs, some of us know how to decipher what a temporary love interest is. Lxa? I think you know where I'm heading with this.

I'll acknowledge my admittedly negative appraisal of CL as someone who recognizes its value to the LGBT+ community and treats it as valid while not caring for L/CL on a narrative level. I felt, when swayed by L's influence, Clarke became the antithesis of what I found admirable about her. I resented Clarke's acquiescence of her power to the commander. I wanted nothing more than to remove the wedge L had driven between Clarke and Bellamy.

Let me try to give L/CL the benefit of the doubt for a minute. I don't hold L as responsible for Clarke's choices, but I recognize the prominent role she played in their upbringing. The push and pull was an intriguing aspect of their dynamic, as was the chance to meet a manifestation of who Clarke might have been if she was all head, no heart. Her fall from grace was arguably necessary for her to be a fully-rounded character, not a Mary Sue. It wouldn't be realistic for the protagonist of a tragic story about a brutal world to be a pure cinnamon roll. When forgiveness is an innate theme with Clarke, it would be my bias at work if I was content with her applying it to everyone but Lxa. Clarke saw enough commonalities between her and L to identify with the latter. When she extended forgiveness to L, I believe it was her way of taking the first step on the path to making peace with herself by proxy. None of this means I wanted them paired up. At best, I made my peace with seeing the relationship through to its eventual end. In time for L's death, ironically. My passivity about them notwithstanding, my conclusions are, however, supported by canon.

If I may submit a Doylist reason for romantic CL? Jason knew he had a massive subfandom itching to see them coupled, thereby boosting ratings and generating media buzz. A Watsonian reason? Without relevance, I think L would have been another Anya to Clarke. Grapple shortly with the unfair taking of a life right as they choose to steer towards unity, melancholy giving way to the inconvenience of the loss of a potential, powerful political ally. Romance ensured her arc with L would have the designated impact on Clarke's character moving forward in the next act.

For a show not about relationships, Jason has routinely used romantic love as a shorthand for character and dynamic development. It's happened with so many hastily strung together pairings. And when it does, everyone and their mother bends over backward to defend the relationship. It's romantic because it just is. Didn't you see the kissing? Romantic.

No, The 100 at its core is not about relationships, romantic and otherwise. But stack the number of fans invested exclusively by the action against those of us appreciating a strong plot but are emotionally attached to the characters and dynamics. Who do we think wins? Jason can cry all he wants over an audience refusing to be dazzled solely by his flashy sci-fi.

Funnily enough, "not about relationships'' is only ever applied to Bellarke. Bellarke, a relationship so consistently significant, it's the central dynamic of the show. The backbone on which the story is predicated. Only with Bellarke does it become super imperative to represent male-female platonic relationships. As if Bellarke is the end all, be all of platonic friendship representation on this show. In every single television show in the history of television shows.

Where was this advocacy when B/echo was foisted upon on us after one scene between them where he didn't outright hate Echo? When one interaction before that, he nearly choked the life out of her. If male-female friendship on TV is so sparse, why didn't B/ravens celebrate the familial relationship between Bellamy and Raven? Isn't the fact that they interpret Clarke as abusive to Bellamy all the more reason to praise his oh-so-healthy friendship with Raven as friendship? They might be the one group of shippers at the least liberty to use this argument against Bellarke, lest they want to hear the cacophony of our fandom's laughter at the sheer hypocrisy of the joke. Instead, they've held on with an iron grip to the one sex scene from practically three lifetimes ago when the characters were distracting themselves from their feelings on OTHER people? They've recalled this as "proof" of romance while silent on (or misconstruing) the 99% of narrative wherein they were platonic and the 100% of the time they were canonically non-romantic.

Bellarke is only non-romantic if you believe love stories are told in the space of time it takes for Characters A & B to make out and screw each other onscreen, a timespan amounting to less than the intermission of a quick bathroom break. If it sounds ridiculous, it's because it is. And yet, some can't wrap their heads around the idea that maybe, just maybe, a well-written love story in its entirety is denoted by more than two insubstantial markers and unreliable qualifiers. B/raven had sex, and the deed didn't fashion them into a romance. Jasper and Maya kissed but didn't have sex. Were they half a romantic relationship? Bellarke is paralleled to romantic couples all the time, but it counts for nothing in the eyes of their rival-ship fandom adversaries. Take ship wars out of it by considering Mackson. Like B/echo, the show informed us that Mackson became a couple post-Praimfaya, offscreen, via a kiss. Does anyone fancy them an epic love story with their whisper of a buildup? Since a kiss is all it takes, as dictated by fandom parameters, we should.

If Characters A & B are ensconced in a romantic storyline, then by definition, their relationship is neither non-romantic nor fanon. "Platonic" rings hollow as a descriptor for feelings canonically not so.

If the rest of the fandom doesn't want to take our word for granted, Bob confirmed Bellarke as romantic. Is he as delusional as we are? Bob is not a shipper, but he knows what he was told to perform and how. Why do the pineapples twist themselves in knots to discredit his word? If they are so assured by Jason's word-of-god affirmation, then what credibility does it bear to have Bellarke validated by someone other than the one in charge? They're so quick to aggressively repudiate any statement less than "CL is everything. Nothing else exists. CL is the only fictional love story in The 100, nay, the WORLD. CL is the single greatest man-made invention since the advent of the wheel."

We've all seen a show with a romantic relationship between the leads at the core of the story. We all know the definition of slowburn. We can pinpoint the tropes used to convey romantic feelings. We know conflict is how stories are told. We know when interferences are meant to separate them. We know when obstacles are overcome, they're stronger for it. We know that's why the hurdles exist. We know those impediments often take the shape of interim, third-party love interests. We know what love triangles are. We know pining and longing.

Jason wasn't revolutionary in his structure of Bellarke. He wasn't sly. Jason modeled them no differently than most other shows do with their main romances. Subtler and slower, sure. Sometimes not subtle at all. There's no subtlety in having Clarke viscerally react to multiple shots of Bellamy with his girlfriend. No subtlety in him prioritizing her life over the others in Sanctum's clutches. In her prioritizing his life above all the other lives she was sure would perish if he opened the bunker door. There is no subtlety in Bellamy poisoning his sister to stave off Clarke's impending execution. In her relinquishing 50 Arkadian lives for him after it killed her to choose only 100 to preserve. In her sending the daughter Clarke was hellbent to protect, into the trenches to save him. In him marching across enemy lines to rescue her. In her surrender to her kidnapper to march to potential death, to prevent Bellamy's immediate one. No subtlety in Josie's callouts. No subtlety in Lxa's successful use of his name to convince Clarke to let a bomb drop on an unsuspecting village. Bet every dollar you have that the list goes on and on.

There are a lot of layers to what this show was. It was a tragedy, with hope for light at the end of the tunnel. It was, first and foremost, a post-apocalyptic sci-fi survival drama. Within this overarch is the story of how the union of Clarke Griffin and Bellamy Blake saves humanity, ushering in an age of peace. In this regard, their relationship transcended romance. But with the two of them growing exponentially more intimate each season, pulled apart by obstacles only to draw closer once again, theirs was a love story. A romantic opus, the crescendo timed in such a way that the resolution of this storyline -the moment they get together- would align with the resolution of the main plot. Tying Bellarke to the completion of this tale made them more meaningful than any other relationship on this show, not less.

Whereas the trend with every other pair was to chronicle whether they survived this hostile world intact or succumbed to it, Bellarke was a slowburn. A unique appellation for the couples on this show, but not disqualifying them from romantic acknowledgment.

Framing Bellarke in this manner was 100% Jason's choice. If he wanted the audience to treat them as platonic, he should have made it clear within the narrative itself, not through vague, word-of-god dispatches. A mishandled 180-degree swerve at the clutch as a consequence of extra-textual factors doesn't negate the 84% of the story prior. It's just bad writing to not follow through. And Jason's poor, nearsighted decisions ruined a hell of a lot more than a Bellarke endgame.

The problem is, when Bellarke is legitimized, the pineapples are yanked out of their fantasies where they get to pretend the quoted exaggerations above are real. Here I'm embellishing, but some of them have deeply ingrained their identities in CL to the degree where hyperbole is rechristened to incontestable facts. An endorsement for Bellarke is an obtrusive reminder of the not all-encompassing reception of their ship. A lack of positive sentiment is an attack on their OTP, elevated to an attack on their identity. Before long, it ascends to an alleged offense to their right to exist. The perpetrators of this evil against humanity are the enemy, and they must attack in kind, in defense of themselves.

Truthfully, I think it's sad, the connotation of human happiness wholly dependent on the outcome of a fictional liaison already terminated years ago. I'm not unaware of the marginalization of minorities, of the LGBT+ community, in media. I haven't buried my head in the sand to pretend there aren't horrible crimes committed against them. I don't pretend prejudice isn't rampant. When defense and education devolve into hatred and libel for asinine reasons, though, the line has been crossed. You don't get a free pass to hurt someone with your words over a damn ship war. No matter how hard you try to dress it up as righteous social justice, I assure you, you're woefully transparent.

[diamondcitydarlin]

i would so so love it if we could not do the usual moral / 'healthy relationship' expectation projections on n@ndermo , that thing we do where we have to pick apart every aspect of every era of their dynamic to make sure that they absolutely do not violate any of the 'healthy relationship' laws tumblr set down long ago that i'm -still- trying to figure out. cause I'm already seeing posts like, 'i dONt tHINk guillermo and nandor are EMoTIonALLY MatURe ENougH-' please. for the love of everything please can we not do that cyclical rhetoric this time. of course neither of them are 'emotionally mature', which is entirely the point.

i'm not trying to be mean or downplay anyone's concerns etc etc etc but...yall. this is a universe where people casually get killed and eaten in such a way that is not meant to reflect on the characters' moral codes or the way we perceive them as sympathetic or not. Shadows is not working within the boundaries of 'trying to set an example that all of society should follow' lol it has literally never been that kind of show. it's a show for adults (though that's not to say younger people can't watch it ofc, but it's helpful to understand who this show is written for) who understand and accept that these characters are not role models of how real people in the real world should behave, its a fun comedy about a supernatural world where just about anything goes. the entire point is that the main characters are all a little bit toxic and 'morally bankrupt' to a degree, at least in comparison to the ethical standards that tumblr holds its fictional characters against normally. again tho, none of that is meant to lessen our sympathy for and investment in the characters and their relationships with each other, or lessen our desire to see them succeed and be happy. that has always been the deal.

are we meant to criticize and/or care less about Sean's friendship with the vampires because they were going to (albeit mercifully) rip his head off? Because they over hypnotized him? Because, as vampires, they have an inherent power imbalance with Sean, as a human? no, of course not, because that's not what the writing of this show is leading the viewer to do.

and yes, admittedly this is a little frustrating to see for a pairing that is breaking boundaries and expectations of what we normally see with queer mainstream representation; it feels as tho we're holding a pairing of two non-white queer men to expectations that, frankly, I hadn't seen anyone in the show held to within fandom before. why now does it have to matter that everything is textbook ethical? while i don't think it's the intent to be regressive, that's still kind of what's happening here imo. gay poc men are allowed to be fucked up in shows too sometimes.

the show is not meant to be rubric for real life behavior. while we are meant to love and root for the characters and their dynamics with each other, it is understood that Shadows is not romanticizing anything into a unironic example of 'healthy irl person' / 'healthy irl relationship'. that romanticization of unhealthy behaviors in fictional narratives is why we have these discussions in the first place and shadows isn't guilty of that for the reasons I listed above.

i mean whatever obviously people can have whatever discussions they want lol, I just had to get this off my chest as I'm already seeing the posts here and there about ' why n@ndermo is problematique ' and lest i throw myself into the abyss i just had to whine for a second on an untagged post.

[hamliet]

If there's anyone who must read those scientific studies on the alterations on people who were abused, it's Hori! See the way he's trying to make ende*vor "sympathetic" at cost of Touya portrayed as an unstable child by "his" choice. Just, sometimes I wonder if hori is a smart man or a stupid man who play with people's feelings, especially who mirror in Touya, because they're abuse victims too (just like me)

Firstly, I’m so very sorry you went through that, Anon. You did not deserve it. <3

I think firstly, we need to wait for the chapter before we say that’s really what he’s trying to portray. I do think he wants us to love and sympathize with Touya: Shouto directly says “he’s me,” so I am not sure what else that could mean.

However, I also think there are valid critiques to be had. I’m not addressing this chapter but instead common criticisms (and rebuttals to those critiques) I’ve seen over the past arc. Imo the critiques of this chapter are pretty similar to the ones that have gone before lol so take it as you will, but we’ll see once it’s out!

One thing I see commonly praised is that the Todoroki subplot showcases  different perspectives and unreliable narrators. In theory, I agree. However, in practice, I find the execution of this... messy. This is my opinion and not fact, but I’ll explain why I think it’s bumbling at best within the narrative.

It comes across as wishy-washy instead of hammering home a narrative theme of different perspectives. The narrative theme might be hammered home in the end (see the next paragraph) but for the time being it’s confusing. Different narrator/nuance/perspectives work best when the rest of the story is full of that to emphasize it, but frankly in BNHA the rest of the story is... not like that. Hence, having to change tone, reading, perspective for one subplot (admittedly my favorite subplot!) is a questionable writing move even if done with good intentions.

It also doesn’t work well--for me!--to have these tonal changes in a weekly manga. I’ve talked before about the struggle of serial fiction mediums being how to balance pacing and suspense when your audience gets very small increments at a time. So, while some elements of the story definitely read better when we have the full picture, when you’re giving the reader a sliver of the picture once a week and they might have to wait years for the full picture... to what extent does the tonal changes per week affect the quality of the writing? That’s a question without easy answers, but I don’t think it’s working well in a weekly manga.

Lastly, one of the messy aspects of the story since the Pro-Hero Arc is that I’m not sure Horikoshi knows who he wants to focus on in a lot of ways. Enji as the main character of the subplot--because atm he frankly is and has been for awhile--is a questionable choice. The kids have been afterthoughts for over half the manga. It seems he’s so focused on trying to persuade fans (who are never going to be persuaded) about Enji’s potential for change/that the criticisms can be answered and he’s aware of this and that and this too! that he’s struggling with the overall progression of the story. By trying to answer every criticism, the writing feels bloated and contradictory instead of tight (which can also b e contradictory but like, the themes are better reinforced).

That said, I think Horikoshi really, really cares. I don’t think he’s “stupid” (and I don’t like ableist terms!); on the contrary, I think he’s deeply emotionally invested and listening to people’s complaints. I think he doesn’t want to hurt anyone, and I think the Todoroki and Shigaraki subplots are deeply important and personal to him because of the level of care he devotes to them. But I wish he would just stick to writing what he’s gonna write instead of trying to address every possible concern. Humanity means there isn’t always time to address “well what about X?” Every story has a valid criticism of it, and no story is palatable to everyone.

I personally think the narrative is definitely heading towards reconciliation for the entire Todoroki family. I have my issues and my complaints (boy, do I) but I’m in it for that aspect (and for Shigaraki’s redemption too) even if I complain about quality all the time because critique is what we do on this here blog ;)

[mooglesorts]

man. it's weird, because there's a lot of things about me that are Very Badger Primary, to the point where i would probably pick it with a strong bird model over anything else at this point... except that i hate dehumanization. i saw primaries described recently as 'things you wouldn't be you anymore if you went against,' and more than just about anything else that's it. even when i think people are monsters, i can't see them as not human; i'd be hard put to define exactly what i consider a 'monster,' but it's more about like. good faith than personhood, i suppose?

it's not necessarily a permanent status to be one--people can change--but my deeply held instinct is that once you have done something monstrous you will always be a person who has been a monster by your own choices, and that it's your duty to learn how to accept that while still living your life, and act accordingly from thereon out. you have to reconcile that you are a person with the fact that some doors are closed to you now, and it's up to you to decide what you do from there.

just. like. even when i hate someone and as far as i'm concerned they can go fuck themself, even in the multiple Heavily Badger social environments i've been in over the course of my life--church, progressive circles, the way the structure of the internet kind of just affects you in general--even on occasions where i've gotten swept away and given in to the pressure to dehumanize (or perform it) for a minute, there's always, always been a voice in the back of my head saying this is a person. this is a person. this is a person. this isn't right.

unintentional dehumanization sets off my '...should we really be doing this? we are getting into not good territory here, it's time to pull up and start questioning' alarms. explicit, intentional, purposeful dehumanization sets off the whole ass tornado sirens. if people on my side are doing it it's enough to throw me into a system-destabilizing crisis, because NO NO NO I WANT TO GET OFF THIS RIDE, I WANT NO PART OF THESE PEOPLE'S MORAL SYSTEM, I FEEL UNCLEAN. it's a good way to make sure i will never, ever, ever trust someone again.

things that are Really Really Badger, off the top of my head (after the cut because Long and trauma talk):

[[MORE]]

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-i've always loved playing adoptable games, pet simulators, etc? any game with randomly generated characters that are Yours Now and a Community, in a deeply badgery way. including games where they can die (the satisfying part is making sure they don't). except that, no matter how much fun the gameplay is, if it gets to the point where they start feeling disposable, and the only way to really keep playing is to stop humanizing them, i lose interest. it's super fucking depressing. it feels like part of me dying inside a little. i don't like it at all.

-i've always been drawn to fandoms and roleplaying communities. i was fiercely loyal to, and proud of, my first rp community on dragoncave as a 13-year-old. when my abusive mom found out about it and completely isolated me for half a year, the promise of being able to make it back to them--just sneakier this time--kept me going; when i finally got back and the group had drifted apart in my absence, it.... was absolutely devastating. i never really recovered from it. even then, i spent years trying to get the group back together every now and then, until i finally gave up.

-i am always keenly, painfully aware of the life cycle of a community. every time i hear the sentiment 'you guys are all great and i love this group' my stomach drops, because i know it's only a matter of time before things go sour or the group dissolves. rp groups, skype chats/discord servers, fandoms, you name it, i am always bracing myself or staying away entirely to avoid the inevitable and it hurts. and it hurts to see people taking part in a community i don't dare be part of, which makes lurking in fandoms... really rough. frankly, it takes me a lot of courage every time i express my appreciation for the shc community because i've been burned so many times.

-on that note: i went through some really traumatic stuff at the end of 2020 that completely turned my life upside down, and i was doing bad until i stumbled across the shc community. the moment i started engaging, it was a huge boost to my mental health, and my ability to cope with circumstances under which i was about to break down spectacularly. and it has been ever since! contributing to The Group Project and seeing other folks being friendly with each other gives me the happy feelings.

-i used to go out of my way to build and run spaces, mainly fandom and rp spaces, and took a lot of pride in engineering them so that they Functioned Well. unfortunately it wore me the hell down over the years for Burnt Badger Reasons, and now i'm too jaded, bitter, and exhausted to give a shit about being a mod/community leader anymore because of it lmao

-among those burnt badger things i relate HARD to the Red Ledger narrative. hoo boy.

-i wish i could find it again, but there was an mlp comic i saw once which went into luna's observations of what each element of harmony Means. with the element of friendship, she says that twilight has a massive amount of love to give; right now it's all focused on celestia, but when she learns to expand it outward she'll have grown into her full potential as a person, and she'll change the world. that struck a chord with how i used to feel, hard, and it's really stuck with me ever since. (hello, unhealthy snake model)

-emphasis on 'used to feel,' lmao

-got super invested in a really toxic '''mental health''' community at a low point in my life; exploded HARD trying to help everyone i could; got into vicious, protracted fights with the shitty mods for years about the harmful way they ran their community until i finally managed to go 'fuck this it's not getting better' and leave.

-had to numb myself emotionally to the people around me for a long time once i really started learning about mental health and trauma stuff, because now i was seeing signs of their pain and baggage everywhere i looked, and i couldn't handle not being able to help.

-the imagery with which i think about my bird primary is overwhelmingly negative. whether it's my actual primary or a model, i uh. i feel like a healthy relationship to one's primary doesn't involve associating it with gore.

-i saw a conversation recently about how birds think of morality in terms of 'if you can, you should,' and how that's scary for badgers because their definition of 'can' involves destroying yourself for the sake of that 'should,' and... yeah, that's a mood. that's a BIG mood. thinking about bird primary stuff is hard--and i had to pick up my lion model to deal with it--because it's so easy for me to spiral into a self-shredding spiral of other people are counting on you to do the right thing, how dare you pull back for your own health and sanity. how dare you turn your back for even a minute. how dare you rest. the work is never done.

which is... a very exploded badger approach to exploded bird morality. whoops.

-fix-it and time travel fiction in which Everything Went Right This Time and It's Going to Be Okay are one of my very favorite self-indulgent fantasies. i will enjoy putting characters through the wringer in all kinds of creatively horrific ways which may or may not end on a downer note, certainly, i love that shit, but i will also 90% of the time have a backup version of the arc or dynamic that's softer and lighter and Actually Healthy This Time. it's the dichotomy there that really gets me tbh, a story where Everything Ends Happily by default will mmmaybe pull me in? but stories where there's the constant shadow of this could end horribly, it's supposed to end horribly, and we got a happy fucking ending anyway are just... that shit will make me cry, man.

it's also why i kind of really hate stable time loop stories where it initially looks like this is going to be The Good Timeline this time around, but OOPSIE everything went to shit anyway! we're right back where we started, just like it was meant to be all along! it's a tired cliche by this point and an unsatisfying one for me, and it makes me roll my eyes every time.

-this is relevant to the bird vs. badger because like... my gut instinct is to prioritize people over systems. when shit hits the fan, when someone's fallen into the machinery and is about to get hurt, i don't feel right about it if i just let it happen. i'll break the machinery if i have to to keep it away from them; i won't feel great about that, and it might cause problems, but fuck it, we'll figure it out later. throwing people into the gears of a system when i'm convinced it's the only option makes me feel Awful.

-related to the above, another trope that really speaks to me in fiction is when a character defies the rules of reality through sheer force of will. no, this is not happening, i don't give a shit what the limits are supposed to be. i refuse to let this be the way things are. (there's that lion model.)

-i've just kind of... always wanted to be an Everyone Badger. it makes me sad how much of that i've lost over the years as i've gotten more cynical, but it's what i wish i could be.

---

doubtless i'll think of more the moment i hit send, and there are just as many things about me that are Super Bird Primary, but like... mamma mia that's some spicy badger. the main thing stopping me is the Can't and Refuse to Dehumanize bit. i also... hm. i think i can function okay without a community? they just help a lot, and it sucks when i'm confronted with one i don't have a (stable) place in. any thoughts? is it possible for a bird system's foundation to run so deep that eventually it overrides the bird?

[dreadnought-dear-captain]

A few comments on the ending of Baghdad Waltz (and story craft in general, I guess)

Perhaps it goes without saying, but SPOILERS ahead. I’ll be posting answers to asks on BW later today as well. 

A few readers, some of them very faithful long-haul readers, are understandably upset that BW did not end the way that I originally predicted - and intended - that it would.

In an Ao3 comment thread on the subject of my previously advertising a happy ending for BW (i.e., an ending where the characters end up together), an anon on Ao3 recently posted this:

First of all, if I had that kind of super long game strategic foresight to cook up and nurture this kind of devious bait-and-switch plan over the course of several years, I would have used that power for good to have every scene and every convolution of character fully developed from the very start. And although this slow burn “bait-and-switch” hypothesis is a perversely flattering one, I’m really not that clever. Or that mean-spirited. I came into this story with an idea of where I wanted it to go and sprinted off the starting blocks with it. This is most certainly “shame on me,” in hindsight, and a product of under-developed skill in story planning and character construction.

I’m not a professional writer by any stretch of imagination. This is a hobby (albeit an obsessive one) that I am constantly working to improve my abilities in. I started writing fanfic because I figured Ao3 is a pretty safe (??) place to do this, since people post works of fiction with wide ranging degrees of skill in an immense marketplace of readers. But I have zero formal training in fiction writing. I grudgingly took my two mandatory English classes in college and then fucked off to do other things I enjoyed more. So that means that I’ve had to learn fiction writing through trial and error in real time. BW is the second work of fiction I’ve written in my adult life (and I am not particularly young, at the moment). And so part of writing this has been learning about outlining and plotting and character development and yes, endings. Not learning to write the best “gotcha” ending but the best ending for the story that’s been written.

Upon deep reflection, I think my greatest fault here was one of skill, not a deficit in character as a human being. When I started planning this story in 2016, I did not have a well-evolved ability to develop my characters to the level that would later be required, nor to predict and plan for every twist of the plot based on the psychological, historical, and behavioral composition of these characters. My first fic, which was also my first novel-length work of fiction ever, went quite smoothly and almost entirely as originally planned, perhaps because it was canon-compliant/adjacent versus being a free-standing AU with no rules or bounds.

So, on one hand, I really am sorry for just not having the necessary skills at the time to wrangle a story of this magnitude from the start (not that I had any sense at all that it would grow to this magnitude). But also... this is just part of the process of learning how to write. In addition, I was simultaneously learning how to navigate the sometimes treacherous culture of fandom, which I was not expecting to be the challenge that it has been. Thus, I didn’t have the foresight to be protective of the possibility that my originally intended ending could change, resulting in assurances to readers in a good faith effort to assuage anxiety about the ultimate course of the story. (It’s also a notable failure of imagination on my part to not potentially envision an ending that breaks from a traditional Stucky “End of the Line” mould.)

On a similar note, when I say that I love and care about my readers, this is not lip service. It is sincerity. I have engaged in this entire endeavor with honest intentions every step of the way. I’m not a devious mastermind who orchestrates the emotional disruption of my readers for fun, particularly not through acts of deceit. I think I’m capable of creating emotionally powerful work without resorting to trickery. 

But I also approach my characters with the same sincerity and intent to do right by them, using a steadfast dedication to realism as my guide. This lead to a frankly horrible realization that the ending I first planned and wanted so badly for them was just not going to be plausible, given who they became and how this relationship evolved. If you’re not a writer, especially not a writer of the extreme long form WIP, maybe it’s difficult to appreciate how characters can take on a life of their own in their psychological construction and development, but this has been exactly my experience. That’s why, for a very long time, I had no idea that this particular ending would be where the story would ultimately go, despite my most sincere efforts at planning with the capabilities I had in each moment.

My compromise for these archival comments mentioning a traditional Stucky happy ending has been to add a note at the beginning warnings of BW to not invest too strongly in plot-related comments, since going back through 3,200+ comments (plus blog posts) and editing them is not only impossible (I actually cannot edit some of my old Ao3 comments, for some reason) but would also require erasing reader comments and entire conversations with people. This doesn’t feel right to me. And I’m not going to add spoiler ending tags. I personally won’t read a fic if the ending is tagged, because I don’t want to be spoiled, and I want to preserve this for other readers in the future.

I am opting to trust from here forward that my comprehensive first chapter warnings about intense realism in all respects (including relational) will be broad enough to cover the potential for this ending, which is also amply foreshadowed as a possibility within the text itself. If future readers specifically want a HEA in their stories, I trust them to seek out the countless fics like this within the “HEA” or “___ with a happy ending” tags on Ao3. 

EDIT: I’ve added the tag “Bittersweet ending,” in addition to creating some more expectation-adjusting language to my chapter one warnings about the story. I think this is a decent compromise to spoiling the ending specifically with something like a “breakup” tag.

So for those of you I hurt by not having a greater grasp of writing craft, I truly am sorry. My intention was never for one moment to be deceptive. I have taken these lessons to heart in the planning of my next story, which has almost every single scene already plotted until the very end. In fact, I’ve written backwards from the ending to ensure a smoother course. I have also done a tremendous amount of work on character development at the outset in an effort not have my characters run away from me and drag the story with them in unplanned ways.

Unfortunately, I can’t change what has already happened; I can only do my best to ensure that it doesn’t happen again. To those of you who have forgiven my immaturity as a writer and accepted where this living, breathing WIP ultimately ended up, I’m extremely grateful for your flexibility.

[sepublic]

What do you think Anne, Sasha, and Marcy’s reactions would be to Luz and vice versa?

           …Bless you Anon, this is one the best possible asks I could have EVER gotten!

           I think that Luz and Marcy would get along with the most, definitely! They’re both total nerds and dorks who hyper-fixate onto their interests and are heavily neurodivergent-coded! They both arrive in another fantasy world, and ultimately embrace their circumstances because it’s JUST like those fictional adventures they’re so invested in! Luz and Marcy both take very well to their new surroundings and fit in like a very unusual glove, but a well-fitting one nonetheless!

           They’d 100% bond over stuff like RPGs, though I’m not sure if Marcy would express the same interest in The Good Witch Azura! Still, they’re both nerds with interests, and they’d acknowledge that, likely becoming super-interested in the worlds of the other and asking questions! Although I can see Marcy definitely being more interested in the technical know-how of things than Luz, with Luz still humoring Marcy’s ramblings anyway because she knows how good it is to feel listened to! Luz would also be more of a straight-man (in name only she’s very bi) to Marcy; She’s interested in stuff but not THAT interested. Like Anne, she’d probably have to keep an eye out for Marcy, doing even crazier things to keep her safe and undisturbed!

           I can see a point of contrast coming between the two however, in that Marcy… Well, we don’t know this for sure, but it’s possible that she has trouble distinguishing fantasy from reality, in the sense that sometimes she can be so caught up in the idea of living out a magical adventure, that she might forget that this is still real-life with actual consequences for living, breathing people! Again, we have no confirmation, this is just speculation… But regardless, this could easily come into conflict with Luz, who HAS had her occasional issue with this in the past; But she’s also someone who’s very mindful of her own behavior and the impact she has on others. Anytime Luz HAS screwed up like this, she very quickly realizes her mistake, often on her own, and makes up for it; Hence Wing it like Witches, for example!

           Perhaps Luz would have to get it into Marcy’s head while this IS a fun adventure, they should also be mindful of the people around them, and the consequences of what they do. Luz would remind Marcy that it’s important to respect the agency and privacy of others, and to not treat everything as a game. And, I’m not exactly sure how Marcy would react, because… Well, we’ve only gotten a single episode from her! Almost paradoxically, Luz and Marcy are the interaction that would get along the most, but are also the ones I understand least!

If Marcy WERE to have these issues, I could see Luz citing her own personal experiences, explaining that she does understand the temptation to bury oneself in fantasy, especially if nobody else was around to really listen to them back home. Marcy could’ve been bullied until Sasha stepped in, for all we know; Either way, I could see Marcy having once been lonely (and still feeling misunderstood amidst her friend group), and bonding with Luz over this.

           As for Sasha and Luz… As someone who is very mindful of how she treats her friends, and has also seen genuine bullies like Boscha, knows what a good friendship is, and already rebels against controlling systems… Luz would very much catch onto Sasha’s toxicity, and likely have her own things to say about it! And Sasha would probably react negatively, because she’s doing what she has best in mind for other people, she knows better!

           Luz, of course, would not be deterred- While she’s willing to compromise with others, when it comes to things that REALLY matter, like speaking out against what she feels is wrong; Well, I can see a similar scene to when Luz lectured Bump, forcing him to evaluate why students like the Detention Kids got into trouble in the first place. If Marcy and Anne were ever brought up, I could see Luz pointing out that there’s a reason those two have issues with Sasha. And depending on what point in Sasha’s character development such a callout would happen, a lot of things could occur.

           I could see Sasha getting pretty angry, reinforcing her will more and more until Luz just outright makes it clear, 100%, that she’s not going along with this. When Luz interacted with Emira and Edric, she was initially unsure of openly defying them… But nevertheless, she still made efforts to hide Amity’s diary, and when she WAS found out, Luz immediately struggled to protect Amity’s privacy. She isn’t exactly a pushover; Merely reasonable, and there’s a big difference.

           As for Sasha, after seeing how Luz has reacted? It’s possible that she may end up reevaluating herself, as she’s likely never had a friend react in such a way before up until the duel at Toad Tower. Or, she’ll just get angry and brush off Luz, letting her do her own thing because she just met the girl! Again, Sasha is someone who’s going through a lot in her life, so it’s hard to pinpoint her exact reactions; Especially since we’re going off of the idea that they may be meeting for the first time.

           Otherwise, though… Any discussions of toxicity aside, if Sasha and Luz just got to interact like normal people; I can see Sasha being friendly towards Luz when they first meet! She’s a very social person and prefers for things to go along smoothly, as seen with how she handles Margot. And of course, Luz would be friendly because… it’s Luz we’re talking about here! I can see Sasha getting along initially because Luz is just like Marcy, albeit less oblivious and admittedly more ‘bearable’ as a friend!

          We don’t know exactly how Sasha met Marcy… For all we know, Marcy was willing to do homework for her and THAT’s why they became friends! And Luz is a nerd, but not exactly in the academic sense? Like she loves to learn, but she stifles beneath the school system. Maybe Sasha sort of ‘gets along’ with Luz superficially, but otherwise there’s not too much interest there. Unless the two were put into a circumstance where they hung out frequently, I could see all of the stuff I mentioned before happening.

          Post-Toad Tower, I could also see Sasha wanting to be cold and distant because she can’t trust anyone, only to be won over by her own loneliness, Luz reminding her of Marcy, and of course Luz’s own genuine positivity! I think that even if Luz would have things to criticize, she’d ultimately support Sasha in being the best person she could be; Especially if she suspects that Sasha is genuinely troubled emotionally-speaking.

         Luz is also one for rebelling against controlling systems, although she’d probably notice that Sasha’s motives aren’t necessarily from a place of good intention, and I can see her not wanting to see Toads placed above everybody else, but rather true equality for all species! On another note, if the two opened up to one another, I imagine Luz admitting she feels like a weirdo and outcast sometimes, and Sasha immediately being all, “Actually you’re NOT Luz, you’re cool and better than those losers and if anybody says otherwise, they’ll have to go through ME.” And Luz is flattered, touched, and also concerned- Regardless she appreciates the gesture and tells Sasha that she doesn’t have to be vindictive.

           Finally, Anne and Luz… Well, I think they’d get along! It’d be a bit funny to see Anne, who’s actually younger than Luz, act more like the straightforward, older sibling of the bunch; She’s used to having to take care of Sprig and Polly, so Anne would be the ‘practical’ one of the duo! Of course, seeing how Anne got along with Sprig, who like Luz is a total dork and is neurodivergent-coded, I really can’t see them NOT being friends! Luz of course would be very supportive of Anne, and be a very helpful friend; While Anne lectures Luz on practical stuff, like not getting into trouble… Luz would be supportive as someone whose positivity could help Anne with her self-esteem issues, guilt, her feelings of being a burden on others, etc.

           I mean, look at how kind Luz is towards Amity! She’d help Anne realize that she isn’t dragging anyone down… That no, she’s a good person and always has been! Her feelings are valid, and I think Anne would be caught by surprise at how open and unashamed Luz is of herself… But ultimately she’d be inspired to also not feel like she has to ‘fit in’. Not to mention, Luz would totally be willing to let Anne open up about her own PTSD and doubts about her friends, while at the same time willing to step in and remind Anne of whenever she’s doing anything too toxic of selfish! And of course, even if Luz DOES step in, she’ll also recognize that Anne is someone who’s trying her best, and won’t try to hold her mistakes against her. It’d definitely be a change of pace compared to, say, Sasha.

           Finally, I can see Anne not really ‘getting’ Luz’s interests, but humoring them, and vice-versa! I think Luz would just be pretty excited to have another friend, and Anne, while a bit taken aback, would still be pulled in by Luz’s infectious giddiness and learn to embrace the weirdness even more! Luz would also likely learn to be even MORE feral with Anne’s guidance! I just feel like these two have a LOT to show each other, and they’d 100% get into dumb antics all the time.

           (Again- A lot of their interaction depends on when these three meet each other, at which stage in their character development. Luz also would have to look after everyone except Anne, who she could actually get to do things without worrying, at least for a bit!)

[anidealistatbestburntoutatworst]

i am certain i am not the first to declare kunikidazai are the sun and moon trope however, not by the tropes most on the face meaning-

you see kunikida at first glance is the sun and dazai the moon, their respective mentalities, backstories and mannerisms reason for this assumption- but it is their mindsets, their outlooks on life and the mindset-driven worlds they live in that they are in fact inverse.

kunikida is the moon, as there is an underlying darkness within his idealistic naïveté- holding its place in the sky yet unable to shine his light in a way where the world will see to it that it is properly appreciated.

dazai however, is the sun, as his odasaku-driven change in heart drove him to channel his internal light as a guide for others (atushi, akutagawa) radiating a sense of stability and hope that of the sun offers to all whose lives are touched by its light.

[lanonima]

This ended up being slightly later than intended but anyway, my review for Nan Chan:

Romantic - Fucky is not how risque a work is but rather my opinion of the attitude/quality of the main relationship, the way the characters interact with respect to one another. I like a lot of stuff in fiction but if you’re easily made uncomfortable, stay towards the top half.

Easy reading - Plot-heavy is how I personally consider the plot’s intricacy and successful implementation, regardless of the author’s intention.

Nan Chan

Author: Tang Jiuqing

Quality: 8

Enjoyment: 6

Comments: This one is kind of weird because it's definitely competent, it's well-written and has a fairly in-depth plot, but I just didn't really enjoy it all that much? I never got emotionally attached to any of the characters, and I didn't even really get the relationship buildup. I understand what the author is going for with it of course, but it didn't necessarily make a lot of sense… Or rather it seems like some bits in the middle were just missing, there's good buildup in the beginning and in the end but how they got from point A to point B was kind of not explored to my satisfaction. I did really like the flashback to the past, I thought that storyline was all pretty interesting. The big bad was kind of disappointing to me as well though. In general, I think this is a really good book with a lot of skill behind it but it's just not really my thing.

Would I read it again: No.

The reviews of things I previously read are below the cut.

Mo Dao Zu Shi

Author: MXTX

Quality: 9.5

Enjoyment: 10

Comments: I have a huge emotional connection to this novel. There are some weak parts, the tension isn’t quite even, she’s pretty terrible at erotic scenes and not great at fight scenes…but that being said, I love the characters and some of the plot points really ripped my heart out. This is a novel that’s really driven by the characters so if you’re a character-focused person like me, definitely look into it (as if we all don’t already know it lmao). I really, really love this story. Every single adaptation of it has also been great, but the novel is still my favorite. It was my introduction to xianxia novels too, so you can say it changed my life!

Would I read it again: I’ve already read it twice, and consumed every adaptation (sometimes also multiple times)

Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System

Author: MXTX

Quality: 6

Enjoyment: 5

Comments: I’m not much of one for comedy and, as I discovered, not really into system novels either. Clearly weaker than MXTX’s later work, many of the characters are somewhat bland, she hasn’t quite found her groove yet. It’s not my style but the fandom is hilarious and the fans constantly produce content that I actually do find entertaining so overall I still have some fond feelings for this one, even if not for the source material.

Would I read it again: I found a different translation and am willing to try again in the future, I’m also willing to watch the donghua. But I can’t guarantee I’ll like it any more than previously.

Tian Guan Ci Fu

Author: MXTX

Quality: 10

Enjoyment: 10

Comments: I love this book…but not as much as I love Mo Dao Zu Shi. I think the plot is somewhat typical, however the characters are great once again (though maybe slightly less deep than MDZS), and her use of thematic repetition and foreshadowing are killer. Actually, I liked this book more the second time around because it just hits differently. Definitely the best of MXTX’s couples, they are so soft and sweet. Very long, but worth it.

Would I read it again: I already have, was personally translating the manhua before I hurt my arms, and am eagerly awaiting the donghua this fall!

The Villain’s White Lotus Halo

Author: A Big Roll of Toilet Paper

Quality: 10

Enjoyment: 10

Comments: Fuck, I love this one so much…..even though it’s also a system novel. But that part is in it so rarely that it reads more like pure fantasy. I love the characters, I love the plot, I love the way the relationship is developing. Oh yeah, the translation isn’t even complete but I already purchased not only the original from JJWXC but also the print edition. I’ve even drawn fanart for it, which is so unlike me. Every time a chapter comes out, I’m ruined for the rest of the day, I can’t think about anything else. Good fight scenes, which is uncommon. My favorite danmei novel so far.

Would I read it again: I fully intend to once the translation is complete, and also plan to read it in Chinese later (I’ve already read certain parts in Chinese hahaha but not the whole thing)

2Ha (Husky and his White Cat Shizun)

Author: Meatbun Doesn’t Eat Meat

Quality: 8

Enjoyment: 10

Comments: 2Ha is not for the faint of heart, it’s very horny, and violent, and has a lot of questionable content. However I love it so much. The story and characters are great, Meatbun really has me by the heart. The writing is a little more on the casual side but it hardly matters because the story is so great. Good fight scenes. Chu Wanning is like, the ultimate Me™ character, I hate how much I adore him. If you read this, just go into it knowing that it’s a long emotional journey, the characters are very dynamic and there’s a lot of character development.

Would I read it again: Same as the above, I plan a reread when the translation is done and have read parts in Chinese and might read the whole thing again later. Cautiously eager about the up-coming live action and donghua.

Di Wang Gong Lue

Author: Yu Xiao Lanshan

Quality: 2

Enjoyment: 9

Comments: This is one of the most terribly written things I’ve ever read, but I’m a character girl and the characters and ways they interact fucking kill me. I’m constantly entertained….although I don’t think this is actually supposed to be a comedy. If I were going to treat myself and like, take a bubble bath and read something that made me laugh, this is exactly the sort of trashy romance I would want to read. Technically a political intrigue story but it’s so abrupt and full of holes, are any of us reading it for the actual plot? The donghua is on Youtube, I watched it first and recommend others to do the same. If you can handle that, you can handle the book because it’s exactly the same in quality, just gayer. I do love the main couple a lot, the set-up surrounding the relationship is great, and the side characters are also really fun.

Would I read it again: Probably not, but I’m still having fun with it. I watched the donghua and read a bit of the manhua as well, which has very cute art and is probably my favorite version of the story.

Liu Yao

Author: Priest

Quality: 6

Enjoyment: 7.5

Comments: I really struggled getting into this one, it took me about 25 chapters to get invested. Initially I had rated it a 6 in enjoyment but after careful thought, I realized that even though it was so hard for me, it probably is my favorite Priest novel and I really do love the main couple so much. Her side characters also seem to be slightly stronger than usual in this one. Decent plot, not too much or too little. It seems really chill to me, doesn’t provoke much of an emotional reaction but I do think it’s very sweet, which is nice sometimes too.

Would I read it again: No, but I think (?) it’s supposed to get some kind of tv adaptation (drama or donghua, not sure), and if that happens, I’ll watch it.

Didn’t Know the General was Female

Author: Rong Qing

Quality: 4

Enjoyment: 6

Comments: Not the greatest thing I’ve ever read, but cute. It’s short, and a little lesbian fluff is never a bad thing. Writing is a bit weak and the plot is basic, but the characters are enjoyable and I liked it overall.

Would I read it again: No.

Wrong Way to a Demon Sect Leader

Author: Yi Zhi Dayan

Quality: 4

Enjoyment: 7

Comments: Again, not the greatest in writing or plot, it’s a bit shallow. But I found the idea of it to be entertaining, and actually liked it more than I would have assumed. It’s fairly short and cute, like a good summer beach read.

Would I read it again: Probably not, but possibly, if the stars align.

Female General and Eldest Princess

Author: Please Don’t Laugh

Quality: 7

Enjoyment: 6

Comments: A very good first effort, but the writing is a bit weak. It’s slow to start and I don’t think the political plotline is spectacularly strong. Some things were left unexplained, and her sense of battle tactics and fight-writing were very confusing, definitely room for improvement. I don’t think it’s as good as people say, but she writes with the air of someone who will continue to improve. And also, a lesbian author writing lesbian stories so that’s a plus. Overall I enjoyed the experience, this story is definitely worth a read.

Would I read it again: Maybe, but probably not.

Sha Po Lang

Author: Priest

Quality: 7

Enjoyment: 7

Comments: Originally I rated this one higher, but on later thought I realized that I actually enjoyed Liu Yao more. I personally have issues with the way Priest writes, and this book showed a lot of them. Characters were okay, I did like the main couple, but side characters were weak as usual. The plot is pretty good, though not great, and I think some of the pacing is off. Some descriptions were confusing, but that could be a translation issue. Overall, still a pretty good political drama, but I would say that of the three I read, this was the Priest novel with the least impact on me.

Would I read it again: No. But I will watch the live action if it ever gets made.

Guardian

Author: Priest

Quality: 6

Enjoyment: 5

Comments: I love Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan, thought the plot was interesting, and there were some enjoyable moments. But it has all the problems I usually have with Priest in addition to some choices that offend me as a queer reader. I spent about 75% of the time reading while pissed off. And actually the fact that it had a happy ending kinda bummed me out because I love a good tragedy. Overall, I can only give it an average score. If you like Priest, you’ll like this one too. I’m not a tv person but I binged the hell out of the live action, I really loved it, so I was sort of disappointed that the source material didn’t seem as strong as I had assumed.

Would I read it again: No, but I will happily watch the live action again some day.

Jing Wei Qing Shang

Author: Please Don’t Laugh

Quality: 9.8

Enjoyment: 10

Comments: I have to start off by saying: damn girl. The improvement evident in this book is absolutely insane. A few minor issues prevent me from giving it a 10 out of 10 – her transitions are still extremely abrupt, the ending is slightly weak and some plot points remain unresolved, and her use of narrative repetition is too heavy-handed for my taste. Other than that, this book leaves me almost speechless. Very similar to Female General and Eldest Princess, there are many similar themes and events. But while I thought FGEP was fairly cute, I like this one way better. If you like angst, political intrigue, and lesbians, you should definitely read this book. I have no doubt that Please Don’t Laugh will continue to improve in the future, and I really look forward to following her career.

Would I read it again: 100%, I absolutely intend to read this again sometime in the future. It’s very long and very dense but delightful and ultimately worth it.

Fox Demon Cultivation Manual

Author: Feng Ge Qie Xing

Quality: 8

Enjoyment: 10

Comments: This was a delightful romp. I had expected it to be somewhat silly and was pleasantly surprised. It was heavy enough to be engaging but light enough to be an easy read, with multiple spots that made me literally laugh out loud which does not happen often. This is apparently just one book in a series of same universe novels, and a lighter-hearted one at that. I would be interested to read the others because I found the world pretty engaging, and I do want to know what became of the other characters. Overall I found it very fun and very cute, I read it in four days so that says something. On the downside, the link for chapter 9 is broken. But skipping a chapter doesn’t seem to have affected the experience of the novel as a whole.

Would I read it again: Yeah I think I would be willing to read this again someday. If it gets adapted I would also consume adaptations, in addition to being interested in the other connected works.

Golden Stage

Author: Cang Wu Bin Bai

Quality: 6

Enjoyment: 7

Comments: This one has some Sha Po Lang vibes, but the characters have more depth and chemistry. The word ‘more’ here is extremely relative because it’s still pretty shallow. I honestly liked them both, I liked the relationship and the psuedo-rude way that they flirt entertained me. As for the plot…ehhhh. It tried. There were things that worked, but in general the plot seemed disjointed from the characters and there were a few things that had no business being there and just muddied the waters. It’s not bad necessarily, it’s just not very smooth. There are better political intrigues to read if that’s what you want. But if you just want some sugar-sweet fluff with a backdrop of drama, then this one is perfect. My favorite scene was probably the flashback to the first few times they met, absolutely fantastic.

Would I read it again: Nah.

[probablyobsessingovertv]

My Opinions on Varchie, Bughead, and Barchie’s Chemistry

I know a lot of my fellow Varchie/Bughead shippers strongly dislike Barchie. One of their biggest arguments against the pairing is that they lack development over the past four seasons and that seemingly, this cheating scandal has come out of nowhere with very little warning or sense attached, which I agree with. It does feel like Betty and Archie’s (especially romantic) relationship has been very minimally developed over the last few years, making this seem sudden, unexpected, and in my personal opinion, not logical. Especially considering how good, strong, and healthy Betty and Jughead’s, and Veronica and Archie’s relationships appeared in S4. I didn’t really think that we were headed for infidelity or dishonesty, secrecy or betrayal. Not at all. I understand and respect why, from a drama and entertainment standpoint, it was done, but within the story, to me, it just doesn’t really make much sense. I hope most Varchies/Bugheads/ maybe even some Barchies or “on the fence” Barchies at least, could agree with that.

Another major argument for the anti-Barchies is the lack of chemistry shared between the characters and even more so, the actors, KJ and Lili. Now I don’t totally disagree with this, however, I believe there are different forms of chemistry that actors can display.

(Before I begin, this is entirely my opinion, with my terminology and categorizations, my ideas of where each fits, etc. All me, no actual research done other than looking at scenes of Riverdale to find examples. It is 1000% okay to disagree with me or to think about this differently. This is just my interpretation as a long-time teen drama tv watcher and someone that spends way too much time analyzing fictional characters, actors, and relationships of all kinds. I have no expertise or credibility in this. I’m just doing it for fun. Also, I believe this can be true in all industries and all relationships, not only in entertainment or on a fictional tv show/movie.)

First, there is Working chemistry. As in two people or a group that just make sense when they are together. There is a natural ease and comfortability between actors that makes those scenes flow well and makes the actors’ portrayal of the friendships/relationships their characters have a lot more believable and enjoyable to watch. KJ, Lili, Cami, Cole, Mads, Vanessa, Casey, etc, all possess this chemistry with each other. It’s obvious that they enjoy working with each other. They enjoy each other as people and that comes out on screen very well I think. Their irl close friendships and trust between each other definitely make this a lot easier and more authentic in the show as well as in interviews and promos for sure, which is one of the reasons I’m really drawn to this show. (Examples: Core 4 scenes at Pop’s, group scenes in musical episodes, the family groupings, the romantic pairings, one on one friendships like Betty and Veronica, Archie and Jughead, Kevin and Betty, Cheryl and Veronica, the list goes on.)

Emotional/Relational chemistry is similar to working chemistry, but I think it’s a level deeper. This can occur between short-lived romantic relationships, such as a character’s rebound or fling, along with family members, friends, neighbors, etc. I most commonly associate this kind of chemistry with primarily words and sometimes actions or deeds. Childhood best friends are a really good example of this to me, such as Betty and Archie in my mind. This chemistry means that actors/characters deeply trust each other and this trust has usually been built up and developed over the course of many years. The people involved are usually very comfortable with each other, again, trust one another in scenes, and depend on each other. A huge characteristic of relationships that include emotional chemistry is the ability of these characters to be vulnerable with one another, to have deep, meaningful conversation, know how to comfort one another, and the desire to protect, be there for, support, and look after each other. I like to call these brother-sister relationships sometimes.

Though most serious romances possess a large amount of emotional chemistry, a relationship that contains solely an emotional bond cannot progress further, such as a lasting, healthy romance. In my opinion, this is where Barchie’s relationship can be categorized.

Consequently, I greatly disagree with anyone who says KJ and Lili don’t have any chemistry with each other whatsoever. In nearly all of their scenes since S1, we can see that Betty and Archie care deeply for each other. They really trust each other. They feel safe and comfortable with one another and feel the need to protect the other from any kind of harm or danger. They have been there for each other through some very painful and difficult circumstances and have been constant sources of comfort and safety for each other since they were children. They grew up together. They know so much about one another and have been through so much together. KJ and Lili do a fantastic job with this kind of chemistry. Very emotionally driven scenes, scenes of saying what the other needs to hear, being a shoulder for the other to lean or cry on, giving advice to help each other through the trouble they face in their lives, having a good time together, being emotionally vulnerable and honest, showing up when the other needs them, and occasionally letting their emotions get the better of them and, in Archie and Betty’s case, believing that chemistry is a different kind than it really is. (Ex. Archie helping Betty calm down after the Black Hood and breaking up with Jughead for her in S2, 3x5 Archie’s escape when Betty gets him out of the pipe and hugs him, Betty working with Mary and Sierra on Archie’s case to prove him innocent, the glances out their windows. Look, they have good emotional/relational chemistry is what I’m trying to say.)

However, Betty and Archie have only ever kissed while broken up with or in a fight with the character they are most associated with romantically. (And the plan to help Jughead in S4, but that doesn’t count since it didn’t really have any romantic intention and was purely (at least initially) a ploy to distract everyone from the truth of Jughead being alive.) KJ Apa and Lili Reinhart have amazing emotional chemistry. It’s obvious that they care about and trust each other as real life people as well as their characters. They are clearly close in real life and have a pretty similar relationship to Betty and Archie from my observation. KJ and Cami also have phenomenal emotional chemistry with clearly a very deep trust or at the very least, the front of one, between each other as people and scene partners. Cole and Lili obviously do as well, and I could argue that the majority of actors on Riverdale share this emotional chemistry with many of their costars.

What I believe KJ and Lili, not particularly to fault of either of them, lack, is Physical, Sexual, and/or Romantic chemistry. I believe this is the only kind of chemistry that can’t be forced or faked. Physical chemistry is most often displayed in serious, long-term dating relationships and marriages, but can also show up in various other relationships in some circumstances. This usually comes in handy when actors/characters are kissing, hugging, holding hands, innocently touching like rubbing hands, holding faces or playing with hair. This can also be in the forms of heart eyes, certain smiles or flirty glances, etc. I see this as very intentional and almost second nature to most actors portraying couples. Actors with a lot of physical chemistry have to be incredibly comfortable with and trusting of each other. As has been said on countless occasions, lots of romantic scenes in films and tv are very very staged so making them look authentic, unplanned, attractive, and believable is a whole nother level of talent and trust in my opinion.

Most pairs of physically compatible actors tend to come up with their own ideas and improv some “coupley” gestures or ways of showing affection towards each other’s characters in ways that make sense for the story, those characters’ individual personalities, and the relationships between them. The first couple on Riverdale that I think of with strong romantic/physical chemistry is Archie and Veronica. KJ and Cami being the actors that portray them, of course. They have incredible physical chemistry and Varchie are also often seen as an overall very physical couple, constantly wanting to be near and touch each other. Yes, they also kiss, make out, and even have sex often on the show, but their physical chemistry really shows in the little things if you ask me. The overall show of physical affection displayed towards each other is truly so beautiful and looks so real and believable on screen. It’s especially obvious when actors are so comfortable and so invested in their characters that they come up with their own little moments for their couple that they know fans will enjoy. For KJ and Cami, they seem to find 100 different little ways to hold hands or to be very affectionate by touching each other’s hair and having specific movements or gestures they do every time they kiss that real life couples would definitely have, and overall using pretty simple facial expressions and body language to portray the love and the very believable (to me) relationship between Archie and Veronica.

Cole and Lili’s portrayal of Betty and Jughead is also very physically authentic, such as when Cole kisses Lili’s forehead or how she was laying on him in the season 4 Halloween episode. Vanessa and Mads and Choni have great physical chemistry too, due to how much they trust each other and how comfortable and close they are with each other in real life as best friends. Some of those little moments could be suggested by the director, but I know many of the small things are not scripted or directed. I do believe that genuine, physical chemistry is natural and cannot be fabricated. It sure can be exaggerated or diminished by good actors, but it really can’t be entirely faked without being very obvious in my mind.. All this to say, I believe that Betty and Archie lack that physical/romantic connection and I personally think KJ and Lili just don’t naturally have the same level of that chemistry as they do with Cami and Cole. Again, that is not remotely a diss to either actor. Some pairings just don’t work like others do and that’s not because the actors are incapable or “not talented enough” to portray it.

The casting team struck gold with KJ and Cami’s and Lili and Cole’s chemistry and that is very rare to find, especially for an entire cast to be so authentically compatible with each other. In conclusion, I am not completely against the idea of Betty and Archie as a couple, but I’m just not a huge fan of it because I don’t think it would be as realistic or believable as Varchie and Bughead are, solely based on the natural, romantic chemistry the actors have with each other. Not to mention the story and what makes the most sense in that regard.

TL; DR: I don’t blame you. This is my mind at 2am. Basically, I believe there are three major levels of chemistry between people, especially actors and the characters they portray.

1) Working Chemistry: pretty much people (actors) that genuinely like one another, get along, and make the relationships of their characters believable and enjoyable on screen. (aka the entire cast of Riverdale)

2) Emotional/Relational Chemistry: Kind of similar to working, but a level deeper. I refer to these as “sibling/family-esque” relationships. Usually expressed through words and sometimes actions or deeds. This is where I personally believe Betty/Archie’s relationship is.

3) Physical/Sexual/Romantic Chemistry: Everything from flirty glances to making staged romance scenes look authentic, to coming up with sweet little gestures to show affection. I believe this cannot be faked/forced entirely. Physical chemistry is something I believe Veronica/Archie and Betty/Jughead display incredibly well. In my opinion, this is what Barchie lacks. Both the characters and the actors that play them. Not dissing either of them, they’re obviously phenomenal actors and KJ/Lili have amazing emotional chemistry, I just personally think the romantic chemistry between them isn’t as strong as KJ/Cami, Cole/Lili, Madelaine/Vanessa, etc.

*If you made it this far, you’re also in too deep with this show. I’m kidding, I love you. Thank you for reading all of this. I would absolutely love to hear what you think.*

Also, thank you Freya @loverofthor-2 for proofreading and encouraging me to post my brain dump yet again. ❤️

[sylvanas-girlkisser]

Widowmaker

Hmm okay so I’m not actually that invested in miss Amelie, but I will give it my all!

favorite thing about them

Her dumb-truck ass bfghgtg okay no I do actually really enjoy the potential for liberation stories she comes with, and the way that she has to sorta, rediscover her own emotions, as a trans woman with autism that feels in a sense very relatable.

least favorite thing about them

Her actual character design  is so painfully uninspired, it feels like somebody trained an AI on blizzard characters and then someone came in and replaced the vengeance braid with a ponytail.

favorite line

“Cherchez la femme.” I will miss Lacroix, I will 🥺🥺🥺

brOTP

Honestly I think she would get along really well because they have similar backstories but sorta reverse personalities - Also now i wanna write an AU where they travel the globe marrying rich men then having them die under mysterious circumstances before driving off with the inheritance #justGirlyThings.

I also really like the potential for Ana and Amelie bonding. Just two bros relentlessly bullying each other.

OTP

Hmmmm gonna have to say SpiderByte, cause 1) i love Sombra even if I’m bad at her. 2) I like the way Amelie challenges Sombra’s moral compass, does she keep to fighting the greater evil or risk what she has build to save one person. 3) A: [terrible flirty jokes], B: (internally) I love you so much, (externally) I will literally snap your spine - is an amazing ship dynamic.

nOTP

TBH there’s no real ships with WM that makes me go “ew no” besides the obvious ones (please don’t ship her with D.Va or a gay man i swear to god)

random headcanon

Okay so when I was like 9 and attending a school for kids on the autism spectrum I had to do these exercises where a teacher would show me cards with different facial expressions and I had to answer what emotion I thought that expression was conveying.

I’m very attached to the idea that what has been done to Amelie can never truly be undone. Like she can stop being blue, but there is no switch inside her brain you can flip to make her regain her feelings and emotionality - Instead she has to do exercises like the cards one to learn to connect with and express her feelings all over.

unpopular opinion

Uuuughh okay so how do I put this in a way that makes it clear that I’m not trying to start shit or vagueing anyone in particular?

I feel there is a general tendency, within the queer overwatch fandom, when creating fiction about Amelie’s recovery, to put too much emphasis on the trauma she had to endure, while portraying recovery as a passive process and “return to normalcy”. I’m not going to give any examples cause again I’m not trying to start shit, and I don’t think anyone has malicious intent behind doing it. Its just that in the pursuit of “angst with a happy ending”, Amelie’s recovery from both physical and emotional trauma sometimes get treated a bit, video game-y.

Let me explain what I mean: In an mmo, once you are outside of combat/danger, you gradually regain health, its slow, but so long as you don’t get back into combat and take more damage your health bar will eventually return to full. But that’s not how irl trauma recovery works, if you want to get better, you have to actively try for it, and the way you put yourself back together won’t be the same person you were before.

song i associate with them

Hmm, I don’t think this is a great fit for her necessarily, but after some consideration I’m gonna say “To The Throat” by Feminazgul, this mix of mournful piano music, hoarse screaming and aggressive drumbeat feels very Amelie to me.

favorite picture of them

I remember somebody drew a dark skin + curly hair widowmaker that made me incredibly bisexual but since I can’t for the life of me find that I’m just gonna say you should go look at my incredibly talented friend @vice-vereesa (@vice_rees on twitter) who has drawn loads of very sexy and soft art featuring miss Amelie Lacroix - and while you’re there you should give her a follow  and a bunch of RTs cause she’s a cool potato.

send me a character and i’ll list...

[linkspooky]

Thanks for the tags @jeanandthedreamofhorses

Rules:

Name your top 10 favorite characters from 10 different fandoms and then tag 10 people. 

I’m gonna tag @kenkamishiro @inumaqi @bloodycarnations @kaibutsushidousha @desmondneedshisscalpel @harostar @cirrocumulus-cloud @coromoor @sir-argues-a-lot (list your top 10 buff dudes conspic)

Hello my name is link and my faves for each series can be divided into two strict categories, white haired bastards, and black haired bastards. Blonde is just white haired bastard LITE. Herre are ten of my favorite bastards. 

1. Kumagawa Misogi - Medaka Box

 My favorite character of all time, Kumagawa Misogi is a fantastic character because he embodies every bad victim stereotype. He’s aggressive, he lashes out, he blames other people for his problems, he has a bad attitude, he’s pessimistic, he’s ugly, he’s mean. He has every single character trait that people traditionally consider bad, and yet underneath it all he’s still a good guy. By playing the bad victim (which is intentional act on his part because Kumagawa is very self aware especially of his own flaws and weaknesses), he makes the point that all victims even the ugliest ones are still human underneath. 

Like the reason Kumagawa is a bad person isn’t because he’s selfish, or because he doesn’t care about other people’s pain. He cares. He cares way too much, to the point where his emotions are so deeply ingrained in him and so illogical that he almost always acts on those feelings above everything else. At his heart he’s a person who wants to save others, especially those who are weaker and those who have been abused, but it always manifests in the most negative ways and his good intentions always go wrong. 

Yet through all of that we see Kumagawa continues living, and that’s the most important part of his character, even as the worst person ever, even completely useless, even as a disaster for everyone around you, you have to keep living and keep struggling to be better. Kumagawa finds identity in being a loser, and he comes to accept himself the way he is because that’s the only way for him to move forward. Not only that but Kumagawa is clever and genuinely subversive, not only is he capable of outwitting people because he’s so good at bluffs, lies, and he’s just so used to surviving every situation that his brain is stuck in permanent survival mode, but he also subverts the whole ‘weak character has to become stronger to protect the people around them’ trope. Because, Kumagawa is still weak but that never stops him from helping others. He never thinks becoming strong is the solution, and his character development is him leaving the mindset that it would be better if he was the one hurting others rather than being hurt by them. 

2. Enoshima Junko - Dangan Ronpa my favorite Junko is not actually her appearance at the end of DR1, or in DR3, or in DR2 as alter ego though all three of those are fanastic and fun to watch. My favorite reading of Junko is how she’s represented in Dangan Ronpa Zero, as this like, girl who has this incredibly overactive brain who literally makes a plan where she lobotomizes herself because the only way to stop herself from getting bored is to erase her own memory so she constantly forgets everything, and even THAT DOESN’T WORK. 

I’m not saying Junko is a tragic character in any way, but the fact that she can never escape her own head no matter how desperately she tries is what makes her interesting. Even her obsession with despair fails her in the end, because she was getting too bored of a world that was exactly what she wanted, pure chaos. If you read her that way there’s a lot of interesting subtext with her character and her actions. 

The best part about Junko is she’s not what is considered a fictional psychopath in a traditional sense, she actually has the ability to make connections with people and genuinely care about them. However, with Junko that just means you’re going to be worse off then if she did not care about you at all. Junko’s motivations are so simple, she really is just trying to enjoy the life everybody else does, but she can’t because her brain is a supercomputer. And she’s trying to feel something about the world, or create some meaning about the world, some reason to continue living in it and she’s willing to break the world and all her toys to accomplish that. 

3. Dazai Osamu - Bungou Stray Dogs No Longer Human, and The Rising Sun two of Dazai’s works are in my top ten favorite books of all time. Bungou Stray Dogs understands the writings of Dazai when they personify him in this character. 

What makes Dazai so fantastic a character is that he’s genuinely mentally ill and traumatized, especially from the way he acts he’s been suicidal since he was a teen and a person is not born that way. Yet, at the same time he’s also a bad person. Which is a fantastic bit of nuance. He’s not bad because he’s mentally ill, he’s bad because he runs away from responsibility, he abused Akutagawa as a way of venting his feelings for the port mafia then completely abandoned him, he doesn’t trust people and goes out of his way to manipulate and control his own allies. 

Dazai struggles the most with seeing people as people, and part of this is for what I call Junko Reasons when a character is smarter than everybody around them and therefore, can read them to a certain extent that they become predictable and boring and cannot relate to them in any way. Part of this however is also Dazai’s own fear of loss, which makes him want to control everything. 

Rather than an adult, he’s more like a child that’s far too smart for his own good. He is smart enough to predict and control situations far in advance, and yet he’s so emotionally vulnerable that just the idea of experiencing loss itself makes him scared to ever be emotionally invested in anybody. And Dazai will spout philosophy all day to make it seem like he’s simply too smart to have friends, but his one sincere friend was just an average person that became his friend because he treated Dazai like a normal human which is what Dazai wants ultimately. The human failure wants to be human and his story is his slow journey to that state. 

4. Shigaraki Tomura - My Hero Academia Horrible. Terrible. Baby. Infant. Shigaraki Tomura is a character I have loved since his introduction. Just like Kumagawa he’s a character always violently lashing out at the society around him. Also like Kumagawa, he’s always taking in victims of trauma around him who aren’t ‘acceptable’ or ‘good’ victims and giving them an outlet and genuine friends. 

Shigaraki Tomura has scars that reach deep under his skin all the way to his bones. One of the most interesting things about his character is how much of a subversion he is from the way he’s originally presented. All Might reacts to Shigaraki like he’s a psychopathic manchild who does not care about a thing and destroys things for no reason. That is also what All for One raised him to be, someone who exists to be a symbol of destruction and fear and nothing else. 

Yet, we eventually learn why he is this way and how little sympathy the hero system has for a victim like Shigaraki. He’s a man-child because he was literally raised in All for One’s basement, only for the purpose of becoming a villain and nothing else. He’s deeply angry at heroes because he knows deep down none of them would save him, he’s a bad victim, and only the good looking victims get saved. 

Despite having every reason to turn into a heartless symbol of destruction, Shigaraki is very, obviously, not. He’s trying desperately to be All for One, but he can’t be that person, because Shigaraki cares about people too much. He wants validation, he wants freedom, and he wants the same for the people under his protection and that keeps him human and stops him from turning into the monster he was raised to be. 

5. Norman - The Promised Neverland so the exact opposite of a villain who cannot help but be good, we have Norman an undeniably good person who chose to become a villain instead because otherwise he was powerless and that was the only means of accomplishing his high ideals. 

Norman is the smartest of the gracefield children, and admired by both Ray and Emma and yet in spite of all of this, his self esteem is incredibly low. He has always put Emma on a pedestal and declared her a good person, and himself the bad person. Due to that he has almost no dreams of his own, and desires almost nothing for himself, putting absolutely everything into making the ideal world that Emma envisioned come true. 

Norman regularly denies that he is a human being, a common trend on this list, because to be human is to be fallable and make mistakes. He puts far too much pressure on his shoulders, and that turns sensitive, kindly Norman, into a card carrying manipulator that plays high risks games with people’s lives in order to get the best result. He is at the same time, an angel someone wanting to martyr himself for heavenly ideals, and a devil someone who wants to commit evil so Emma’s hands can stay clean and Norman is so complex because he’s simultaneously both at once. 

6. Orihara Izaya - Durarara!! Sometimes you just grow up and become an Izaya stan, and you reflect back and regret every single choice you made in life. Orihara Izaya is interesting not because he’s a card carrying mastermind, but because he pretends to be. 

Izaya’s image as someone who can manipulate all of Ikebukuro is something that far outstrips who he is as a person, which is just a very sensitive and lonely child. Izaya is basically too sensitive to love anybody as an individual, or even be an individual himself, so he denies the personhood of all of humanity and instead decides to love humanity. Because accepting everything about humanity and being happy no matter what the result is easier for him than having to deal with individual hardships. He basically wants to become an observer to everybody, and wants to no longer have a body, or be a person, or have to have feelings that aren’t a bemused smirk. 

Izaya is however, extremely transparent in his actions to the point where several characters can see through him. It’s interesting to have a mastermind-type character whose actually not that much of a mastermind, but still because everybody sees them as one things generally go their way. Izaya is great at lying, bluffing, and playing speed chess but he never really has the city in his palms as much as he claims. 

Another interesting quality about him is how complex he thinks and all these little rules he sets up for himself. Basically his only friend is Shinra because, Shinra is guaranteed never to love Izaya because he already has Celty, and yet at the same time Izaya also gets mad that 1) Shinra will always choose Celty over him and 2) Shinra is too detached to love anyone as a person. Even though, he also envies that detachment because Izaya is too sensitive basically to live. In short Izaya is petty. Petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, and he has to follow his own petty little rules to the letter. 

7. Takizawa Seidou - Tokyo Ghoul: Re he starts as a lovable, but repressed bastard who has all this resentment for his life, and the people around them, and constantly blames them and takes it out on them. Overall though, he’s someone you can see turning into a better person if he just grew up a little.

Then instead of getting better, he gets way worse and hits absolute rock bottom. All of the ugly emotions that Seidou was repressing come to the surface and he turns into a monster who makes other people suffer to take out his long held resentments about the world. Not only that but all of the flaws he shows as a ghoul were there to begin with, he always had an inferiority complex, he always resented others, he always lashed out, it was just they were brought to the surface instead of being repressed. 

Seidou however after hitting rock bottom gains awareness, and also the realization that even after he’s crossed the point of no return a long time ago, he can still continue to live and do improve himself. Not only that but it’s his resposnbility to improve himself for the sake of the others around him. 

One of my favorite parts about his character is he used to be an example of how great Ishida was at not playing Good Victim Bad Victim because Seidou is introduced to us as this monster who went insane because he was ‘weaker’ than Amon who stayed righteous despite being ghoulified. Until we learn that actually, Seidou went insane because he took a chainsaw to the face, and Amon was just saved by other people and never endured the same, and therefore never even attempted to come to terms with himself as a ghoul either. 

One of my reasons for liking bastards is because they are all objectively terrible, but most of them also have such a deep sense of self understanding so that the ones who have positive arcs, actually feel like they’re very honest about who they are as a person and grow from there. They just genuinely accept who they are and live as who they are not in denial about anything. Rather than following a narrative blindly laid out for them they break free and create their own. 

8. Kiryu Yoshiya - The World Ends With You If there is a death game for some reason I always end up liking the mastermind the most. Kiryu Joshua is this child, who is just, too smart, too creative, too much for the world. When he’s pretending to be human that just turns him into a pretentious tool. When he’s the demigod of Shibuya, that means he might destroy the entire city because the people aren’t growing in the way he wants them too.

Joshua is very unique because he’s basically the closest to what I call a “Junko Enoshima for Hope” he places people in terrible death game like circumstances, and shows little empathy at all for the ones who lose, but at the same time his intention is to give a second chance for people who have died, and also to steer people in the right direction. 

In a meta sense Joshua will basically force you to have character development. The fact that he sees himself as the author in other people’s stories means he has to control everything. It’s a unique character trait to have a god complex when you are a literal god. 

Despite his good intentions, he’s also very flawed especially in the way he treats people around him, even the ones he likes like Neku and Sanae. He enjoys pushing their buttons, and pushing them to their limits far too much, and makes attempts to control them like any other piece on the board. Joshua is also, suicidally depressed and a lot of his musings about the world in general are some of the most tragic but insightful thoughts I’ve ever read. The fact that Joshua changes his mind at the end, is basically just as impactful as watching someone give life another chance when they wanted to die, because for Joshua, Shibuya is his life. 

9. Jack Vessalius - Pandora Hearts it’s another mastermind yay. The fun thing about Jack is unlike most of these characters who are like, halfway broken, Jack is just this extremely broken person whose far beyond the point of no return. Not only that but he’s not interested in living as a person anymore anyway, even if he were given the chance to come back. 

Jack has worn masks his entire life, to the point where it’s made him an incredibly selfish person who is never genuine in any situation. A child who has told lies all of his life. At the same time Jack is not the one who got himself started on this path, he’s a victim to the cruel and uncaring ways of the nobility, as a bastard being raised with his mother destroying any sense of identity he had by only seeing his father in him. Jack is in a way for them, a reckoning. 

Except Jack does not care about any of that, because his entire goal is to go to extremes, and make the most convoluted plan in history, because he wants to find a reason for himself to keep living. When the person he was using as a reason to live dies, he decides to destroy the world for basically no reason at all, because the act of trying to destroy the world gives him something to do and a reason to keep on living. 

Jack needs to find identity in something, otherwise he’s entirely empty on the inside and he’s exactly the tool the nobility raised him to be. Which is why he ends up doing all of these things for basically no reason, because that is his reason. He wants to feel things like a person. He wants to desire things like a person. He wants to know who he is, and what he wants. And yet, he’s also so terribly afraid of being a person that he does not let anybody get close to being able to understand him.

In the end one person accepting Jack as a person in spite of all of his lies, and saying they were happy to meet him is enough for Jack to give up all of his plans and instead offer his body up to others. 

10. Accelerator - A Certain Magical Index Accelerator is such a fave for me that I will literally go out of my way to read a series that I’m not even a fan of because Accelerator is in it. 

What I like about accelerator is he is pretty much past the point of no return, and he knows he’s never going to be forgiven for what he’s done and yet that doesn’t stop him. He’s not doing this for atonement. He killed 10,000 sisters and he’s going to save the other 10,000 that are remaining. And he knows he should have done that from the start, but it’s too late to take back a single thing he did. 

Accelerator is just this fantastically messy character. He plays the villain, but secretly nobody desires more for heroes and justice to exist in this world than Accelerator himself. We see him finally motivated to help others, because even if he’s a bastard, and will always be a bad person marked for what he’s done, that’s no excuse not to do something when somebody innocent needs help in front of you. 

He’s also, genuinely traumatized, and also genuinely disabled. He goes from this untouachable character to like, someone who is very desperate, with a very fragile sense of ego whose constantly reliving his trauma and having flashbacks in the middle of fights. Accelerator is so genuinely plagued with guilt for what he’s done it almost destroys him several times. And he’s never going to stop feeling that way. He’s never going to stop being broken. And still he fights. 

11. Jacopo Bearzatti - House in Fata Morgana I know this is cheating but sssh, I wanted to talk about Jacopo. He’s the best bastard on this list because he’s not even a bastard. 

Jacopo is someone who breaks himself into fragments because he’s not good enough. He’s always born in an incredibly low position in life, and is always trying to make something worthwhile of himself. He views himself as a person lower than dirt, whose only good quality is how hard he can work. One of them is going to break, either the world, or Jacopo himself. 

Jacopo’s heart is either made of stone or glass and it’s impossible to tell from an outsider’s perspective, because he’s able to commit himself to doing incredibly heartless things, but at the same time Jacopo is far too kind and emotional and it’s something that destroys him over and over again. Jacopo is someone who always takes far too much responsibility, which means he will forgive other people who have betrayed him, see the humanity in his friends when they turn knives against him, but because of that he ends up being hurt over and over again. Jacopo kills his own heart not because he’s unkind, but because he’s too kind and empathic, and it’s something that will literally get him killed unchecked. 

However, the amount of responsibility that Jacopo takes is ultimately what turns his character from a tragic downfall to a redeeming one, because reincarnation Jacopo is willing to take responsibility for two lifetimes worth of mistakes that were not even his. Ultimately Jacopo does genuinely want to do right by the people around him, which means if they do not want him he would force himself to let go because it’s not just about his atonement but the victim’s feelings as well, but if they wanted him he would spend the rest of his life working for the sake of both of them. Jacopo’s realization at the end of this story, because I want to see it too. Is one of the most touching things I’ve read in all of literature. 

Honorable Mentions: Reiner - Attack on Titan, Akechi Goro - Persona Five, Subaru Natsuki - Re: Zero, Emiya Shirou - Fate Stay Night, Kaworu Nagisa - Neon Genesis Evangelion, Ryoji Mochizuki - Persona 3, ii-chan -Zaregoto, Squall Leonhar - (FF8)