#i’m still in the discord but i haven’t talked there in over a year 😭

[andi-is-bored]

you ever get involved into fandoms and then the phase kind of blows out and you forget about the fandom for awhile but then it either starts trending or you see something big happen in it and remember it exists and feel a tiny bit sad you weren’t involved in it when the big thing happened so you didn’t experience it with all the other fans??

anywayssss i was thinking of listening to the epic musical albums again lolll

[wundrousarts]

Something I’ve noticed for awhile is that I often get comments from people about how they are surprised how I always come up with theories and try to guess what might happen and they “could never do that” themselves. I want to say: yes you can! There’s honestly a shortage of Nevermoor theories and ideas and speculation and etc and I want to see MORE!!!

Want to talk about how Morrigan’s mom is actually secretly alive? How the Scholar Mistresses are a Wundrous Act? Do you think the Tempus Divinity looks like an owl, or do you think Weaving and Ruination would be met together? Or have you ever thought about how this one line, from Chapter 19 of Nevermoor, about Betram Crow actually means he was a Cursed Child? Whatever it is you want to talk about: GO FOR IT!!!

I personally find it very fun to go sort of “English class mode” and look at the text in front of me and think about what different things might mean and analyze it and even overthink it to an unnecessary (but fun!) amount. But that’s just me and how I like to approach things! You don’t need to make long posts and quote specific lines if that isn’t your style. The big thing to remember is that so much can happen in the next six books, so throw any idea out there! You never know what twists and turns will be thrown at us. I think it’s fun to share these ideas and discuss with other people— sure, maybe there’s just something you missed when reading, but perhaps some new ideas spawn might from it. Some speculation could even serve as inspiration for fics!

There are some theories and thoughts that I’ve posted that have been “debunked” when I reread a book, or when someone pointed out something, or even just when something had a real-world basis that I as an American didn’t catch. But it was still fun to think about it all, and there’s some bits and pieces that I see as notable and worth considering. I think most of the Silverborn Masterpost is going to be “wrong”, but if just 1% of it is “correct”, even indirectly, I will take that as a win. I know it feels like during the hiatus everyone’s talked about everything, but I hope that the incoming communal reread (fingers crossed) and obviously Silverborn brings some speculation back to the fandom because I want to discusssssss!

[duckymcdoorknob]

MERRY CHRISTMAS DESSIE POO!!!!!! SURPRISE!!! IT’S ME!!!I’M YOUR SECRET SANTA THIS YEAR!!! @fanfic-chan

IM SO GLAD THAT WE’VE GOTTEN CLOSER OVER THESE PAST FEW MONTHS!! ILYSM BESTIEEE!!!

Double surprise!! It’s the fic idea we had in discord ❤️❤️

Send help why is this like the only gif of these two on this site 😭

I hope this isn’t too OOC; I haven’t seen Tengen in a whole season.🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️

Enjoy your novel-sized gift!!!

Helpful Distraction

Ships: NONE! Zenitsu Agatsuma & Tengen Uzui.

Warnings: this do have tickles in it ngl, mentions of fears and sensitivity to sound.

Prompt: When Tengen notices that Zenitsu is having some trouble in the Entertainment District, he offers a distraction that he remembers from a long-time friend of his.

Tags: REITERATING WITH THE LOVELY @fanfic-chan HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!! THANK YOU TO @nataliewritez FOR ALL OF THE IDEAS ❤️❤️❤️ KNY Taglist: @ticklish-n-stuff, @giggly-squiggily.

Tengen was not anticipating having to take the three brats with him to the Entertainment District. He wanted to just take the pigtailed girl and make the mission easier. Of course, white-knight Kamado had decided to rescue the girl that he was “tormenting” so harshly… What a job this has turned out to be.

So, here he sat. The moon was high, and the four men were seated on a rooftop, enjoying some shrimp tempura that Tengen had purchased for them.

“Thank you, Mister Uzui!” Tanjiro had beamed when he was handed the small package.

The sound pillar had smiled; he liked this kid’s manners.

Inosuke was… well… Inosuke.

And the little yellow-haired kid... He had muttered a “thangkyou”, but he seemed a bit scared of the city.

Why so?

Well, it seemed like whatever was troubling young Zenitsu was long forgotten. The thunder breathing user was smiling happily on the rooftop, talking ecstatically with his friends and kicking his feet above the absence of ground below them.

All seemed to be going well until a firework went off…

Zenitsu squeaked in discomfort, hands shooting up to cover his ears. When he realized what he had done, a tiny whine of protest escaped his lips as he defeatedly watched his tempura topple off of the roof and plummet into the pit of darkness below his feet. He sighed and stared at it, watching it disappear as it was engulfed by the void. His hands were folded in his lap, his feet stopped kicking, and his eyes that had previously been crinkling shut in joy were now dull and unblinking.

Tengen frowned a bit; poor kid…

He wordlessly held out his own second tempura, shaking his wrist in front of the pouting boy.

The sound pillar was shocked at what happened next. Zenitsu looked up at him with disbelief before smiling and taking it, breaking off a small piece and handing the rest back to the hashira. “Thank you!” He chirped.

Tengen smiled, “No, no. Just take it. I ate before we left this morning.”

“Yeah, but that was this morning. You’re super strong, and you need it more than me,” the blonde argued, shaking his wrist in the same way.

The white-haired male exhaled fondly. He picked up the tempura, but chose to hide it inside of the package. He feigned eating motions, side-eyeing the young slayer, who was much happier and chatting with his friends again.

After a few more minutes, the thunder breathing user’s tummy growled loudly, causing Tanjiro to giggle. “Sounds like someone’s still hungry!”

“Tanjirooooo!” The blonde whined, “don’t embarrass me when Nezuko might hear meeeeeeee!”

The hashira broke into boisterous laughter as Zenitsu hid his face in his hands. He whined as his tummy growled once more. Tengen shook his head with a smile as he tapped the boy’s shoulder. When the blonde looked up at, he was met with a grinning Mr. Uzui offering the other half of the tempura that Zenitsu was sure he had eaten.

He was about to take it when another firework flashed across the sky, causing the blonde to flinch violently.

Tengen frowned. That bad, huh?

The thunder breathing user simply carried on and hesitantly took the tempura, munching on it silently. The other two slayers watched in awestruck silence as the colors illuminated the dark air.

Mid bite, another one crackled, and Zenitsu’s breath hitched a bit. The boy began to cough, and Tengen’s hand found itself on the small of his back, rubbing reassuringly. “Are you okay, kid?”

Before the blonde could reply, a set of three loud fireworks popped and forced the poor slayer’s eyes shut as he whimpered quietly.

A look of remorse found its way to the sound pillar’s face when he heard barely audible sniffles.

“Tanjiro, Inosuke,” he called to the two novice slayers, “here’s some money. Please go get some more food for us; it is evident that our little friend here needs more food to be as flashy as he can!” He dropped a decent amount of coins in the brunette’s hands, shooing the two off. When he could no longer hear their footsteps, he turned to the blonde. “Hey, little man… how’re you hanging in?”

Just then, a giant firework exploded before them. The tears that had been pricking the young slayer’s eyes had fallen as he covered his ears. He buried his head into Tengen’s side, seeking any immediate comfort. “Make them stop… please.”

“Shit- it’s worse than I thought…” he breathed, “It’s alright…” the sound pillar soothed as he lifted his arm to let the boy against his chest. Tengen placed his own hands atop of Zenitsu’s hoping to further muffle the sound. Neither said a word as the boy choked out a cry every time another firework would explode. “I’ve got you, it’s okay…” Tengen would repeat.

The fireworks continued at a torturous pace, with each boom being sporadic enough to keep both on their toes, but routine enough to show both slayers that there would be more coming. Zenitsu blinked away a few of his tears, noticing Tengen’s right eye squinting whenever a firework would boom.

He could hear them tenfold too… and here was Zenitsu who was crying a baby.

It was almost as if the pillar could hear his thoughts too. “Don’t worry about me, kid. I’ve heard much louder through my time as a hashira.”

Zenitsu nodded, shoulders coming up as he cringed from another torturous sound.

Minutes passed and the show seemed to be calming a bit. The sound pillar removed his hands carefully, gently cupping the young boy’s cheeks and swiping his tears away. “Are you feeling any better?”

The blonde nodded, hesitating to pull his arms down. “T-Thanks, Mister Uzui, sir.”

“Don’t mention it.”

A solemn silence passed, and a quick glance from the hashira let him know that the thunder breathing user was still shaking like a leaf in apprehension.

“You know,” Tengen mused, “Kyo has this distraction method that he uses with Senjuro all of the time. Would you like me to try it on you?”

A hesitant nod from the boy—who was still squished against the sound pillar’s side— allowed Tengen to begin to plan his course of action.

“Okay, so I’m going to have to touch you for it, that okay?”

The blonde but the inside of his cheek as he thought. “Y-Yeah,” he finally answered.

“Okay! Time for the flashiest distraction you’ve seen, little man!”

With that, an arm locked over the young slayer, and five fingers found their way to his sides, wiggling with a gentle intensity. The thunder breathing user squeaked a bit and was holding in his giggles.

“I-Is - pffehehe- this a p-part of the- ehehe- the dis-distraction?” Zenitsu managed, body squirming from the ticklish touch.

Another belly laugh erupted from the hashira. “Kid, this is the distraction.”

Zenitsu’s face flushed as he kicked his legs, resting his cheek against the arm ensnaring him. “B-But it— kyeahaha- i-it ti-hihihickles.”

The white-haired male smiled fondly. “Does it? I don’t remember that happening with Senjuro…” he feigned a bit of innocence as his hand moved over the boy’s tummy, clawing at the softness.”

The poor young slayer couldn’t hold it much longer…

“M-Mihihihisteheher Uhuhuhuzuihihihi!”

“That’s me!”

“Ihihihihit- hehehehe- ihihihit tihihihickles!”

“Aw jeez, I would hope so,” the sound pillar replied with fake relief on his tongue, “If it didn’t, I would be letting Kyo down.”

Zenitsu, cheek still resting on Tengen’s arm, giggled helplessly as the hashira prodded around his tummy. His legs were still lightly kicking, but there were no signs of protest from the boy.

“You feeling any better, little guy?”

“M-Mhmhmhmhmhm!”

“Good, good! We’ll get you feeling flashy as ever, and then you can-“

A loud boom penetrated the playful atmosphere, causing Zenitsu to whine and both males to rest his hands over the boy’s ears.

“Damn… I was hoping they’d be over by now,” Tengen grumbled, removing one of his hands to rub the young slayer’s back. “It’s okay… just keep your hands up, alright?”

The blonde nodded; all previous giddiness that he had seemed to have evaporated.

“You’ve never been around fireworks before…. Have you?” Tengen inquired, grabbing Zenitsu and holding him in his lap.

The boy shook his head ‘no’, and Tengen sighed.

“Why don’t I keep distracting you, hmm?” A glint of mischief laced the sound pillar’s words as a smile found its way to his face again.

Zenitsu nodded, eyes still closed.

The white-haired male chuckled at the blonde before pushing some hair out of his face. While he was fourteen, he looked so young in the moment. “Alright, I’m gonna start again…” After the warning, Tengen’s hands descended back onto the boy’s tummy, wiggling against his uniform.

Zenitsu began to giggle softly once again, squirming out of instinct. His hands remained over his ears as his eyes remained shut.

Tengen continued to prod and squeeze at the little guy’s tummy, happy to provide him any relief from the amplified sounds.

As the fireworks boomed, Zenitsu’s own hands and giggling managed to successfully block out the amplified sound. “M-Mihihihisteheher Uhuhuhuzuihihihi! Ihihihits wohohohorkihihihing!”

“Great! Now you make sure you keep your hands up, or else we’ll be back in the same spot,” the sound pillar chimed. “Yep… just keep those arms up!” With that comment, Tengen moved his hands up to scribble at the boy’s ribcage.

The young slayer curled against the hashira, his giggles growing in volume. His legs came up to meet his chest, desperately not wanting to put his hands down. “Hehehehey! Thahahats nohohohot fahahahair!”

“Fair? Oh, kid, you should know by now that not a single bit of me plays fair,” the white-haired male chimed as he lightly prodded at the sensitive bones.

“Eep! Ihihihit tihihihickles!”

“But isn’t it helping? You seem so much more relaxed, little man!”

“B-Buhuhuhut! Hyeahahaha! Tihihihickles!”

“Just keep your arms up, and it’ll be fine!”

After a few more seconds on the young slayer’s ribcage, the sound pillar moved his hands up to scribble under the boy’s arms. Zenitsu squeaked and kicked his feet to the best of his ability.

“M-MihihiHIHISTeheheher UhuhUHUHUHUZui!”

“Oooh! Bingooooo!” Tengen cooed at the blonde, “Someone’s ticklish here!”

“Yehahaha! IhiHIHIHITs sohohohoOHOHO BAHAHad!” Zenitsu wiggled about, but never putting his arms down, or asking for it to stop.

“But would you rather be listening to those fireworks? They getcha’ pretty bad, Mm?”

“NohohOHOHO Wohohohorse thaHAHAHAN yohohou!”

“Ohoho! Some lip! Little guy’s got a bit of sass to him!” Tengen’s playful side—courtesy of Kyojuro—was fully out. “Looks like I’ll have to tickle the attitude outta ya’!”

“WahaHAHAHAIt! NoHOHOHohoho!” Zenitsu’s legs were kicking more rapidly, and yet he still seemed to be completely on board with the tickles.

“Mmm, shoulda’ thought about that, kid.” The sound pillar dug in with a bit more fervor, having to work against the thick uniform. “These damn element-proof suits are annoying… they’re also Tengen-tickle-proof!”

The blonde squealed, feeling the increased sensation instantly. “OHOHOHO MY GOHOHOD. DOHOHO NOHOHOT SAHAHAY THAHAHAT.”

“Oooooh?? Looks like they aren’t quite Tengen-tickle -proof after all!”

The boy’s arm threatened to fall many times, but he kept his hands safely planted on his ears. With little legs kicking, Zenitsu squirmed and laughed with his eyes shut, cheeks dusted pink with mirth.

“Soooo… You wanna tell ol’ Tengen why you haven’t asked me to stop yet?”

Ah! He’d been caught!

“Nohohoho reheheasohohon!”

“Mmm, someone forgets where he is…” the white-haired male brought one hand down to squeeze at the blonde’s side at the same time.

“OKAHAHAY- OKAHAHAY- IHIHIHIHIT MAHAHAHAKES MEHEHE FEHEHEEL SAHAHAHAFE!”

Tengen’s own eyes closed and his lips fell into a pouty frown at the adorable reaction. “Well, little man, seems like you came to the right hashira. This flashy guy is happy to make you feel as safe as you need.”

With both hands returned to the young slayer’s underarms, Zenitsu chuckled a few more times before his arms finally trapped Tengen’s hands.

The sound pillar chuckled. “Hey, I need those.”

“N-Nohohoho! Tihihihickles!”

“Well duh. That’s the whole point of-“ a familiar noise caught his attention, a sense of urgency came across his tone. “Zenitsu, give me my hands.”

“Noooo! You’re gonna tickle me agaaaain!”

“I’m serious, kid, quickly.”

With a look of confusion, Zenitsu hesitatedly freed his attacker’s hands. Within a second, he felt warm palms lightly smack over his ears.

He knew Tengen seemed frantic, but was this really necessary? What was he-

At that moment, the brightest firework the two had seen all night erupted into the air, producing an ear-splitting boom.

Zenitsu looked up at the flinching sound pillar with guilt. “Mister Uzui-“

“I’m okay, I’m okay,” the man answered frantically, more worried about the boy in his arms, “Did I get you in time? I heard the fuse going off, and I knew it would be a big one.”

The boy nodded as he moved to sit up, removing the hashira’s hands from his ears. “You cover yours. I’m okay now.”

The white-haired male chuckled. “No can-do, you’re clearly affected more.”

The blonde bit the inside of his cheek as he sighed. “Yeah… sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. We were blessed with one of the greatest heightened senses. It just sucks a bit during firework shows.”

“How’d you know what to do? I mean… you really knew how to take care of me.”

“Only a heartless human would let a little kid cry. Hina’s been helping me to be more of a caretaker; the four of us have been talking about having some kids of our own one day, and I need to be prepared.”

Zenitsu smiled at the thought of a baby Tengen toddling about. His smile soon turned to a frown when the man’s words registered. “Hey… I’m fourteen, not a little kid.”

The man chuckled and ruffled Zenitsu’s hair.

The young slayer sat between the Hashira’s open legs, his back turned while resting against the man’s torso. The two perked up when they heard Inosuke’s voice in the distance.

“You okay to be sitting here?” Tengen asked with a hand on the boy’s shoulder.

“Yeah. Inosuke shouldn’t notice, and Tanjiro won’t say a thing.”

After a few moments, Tanjiro’s chiming voice filled their ears. Zenitsu was right; Tanjiro noticed, but did not say a word about the blonde seeking comfort. Inosuke was too engrossed in getting his dinner to say anything.

“Welcome back!” The sound pillar chirped, “What did you end up getting?”

“We found so many inexpensive stalls! I got more tempura for us, mainly because Zenitsu accidentally dropped his; I got some bentos; a few orders of noodles; AND there was a dango vendor!”

The white-haired male smiled. “Is that so? Got any change?”

The sound of clinking coins and crinkling packages was soon heard, and the four were sharing a meal once again. Zenitsu was about to dive into his tempura when the fireworks began again.

The bursts were one right after another, each sound seeming to be louder than the next. He placed the bag next to him as he cried out loudly, ready to cover his ears. To his surprise, Tengen’s warm, calloused hands had covered them first. He looked back at the hashira, and was met with a patient smile. “Eat,” he mouthed.

Zenitsu sighed and slumped against the sound pillar, finally getting to eat the tempura he had been waiting for.

Inosuke looked up from his meal to see a teary-eyed Zenitsu finally enjoying his own. But… why did the god of festivals have his hands over his… his… uh… what was the word? His… um… listening holes? “TANTORO!”

“Tanjiro,” the brunette corrected, unfazed.

“Why is the god of festivals doing that to Monitsu?” A pointed finger brought Tanjiro’s attention back upon the action he had just missed.

“Oh!” he chimed, “You know how I have a really strong nose?”

Inosuke nodded.

“And do you remember how sick I feel when I smell something really strong? And how upset it makes me?”

Another nod.

“Well, Zenitsu’s ears-“

That’s it! That’s the word! Ears!

“-are really strong, maybe a little stronger than my nose. Do you think the fireworks are really loud?”

A nod.

“So if they’re loud for you and I, imagine how loud they are for Zenitsu. It hurts his ears, and it really makes him upset. It’s best for us to not take notice of it; he’s probably really embarrassed.”

A small “ohh” emitted from the blue-haired male. The two sat in silence once more, Inosuke offering Tanjiro a bite of his dango as the two never broke their gaze from the fireworks.

Zenitsu and Tengen watched as well. The colors illuminated the black sky, and to his joy, Zenitsu could barely hear the pops of sound.

He exhaled.

The colors really were beautiful… aren’t they?

—————♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎—————

[universeinthebox]

Hey again

Shout-out to all the people who liked and commented on my last post. Glad to know that Squeak hasn’t been forgotten. =)

Comments:

winterstraystar said: For Sonic: Thank you for still looking out for his blog, it means a lot. For Squeak: Hope you are going better wherever life has taken you. I hope you live with no regrets 

You’re welcome. I should mention that I’ve done a little writing, and one of my stories is about Squeak. Here it is: https://www.fimfiction.net/story/528407/thanks-for-the-memories

I can’t believe how long it took me to get a fimfiction account. It says something about all the trauma I’ve been through.

There were a lot of us in the Box with mental health struggles of one sort or another. It was really valuable to have that space to talk, and also create! It reminds me of that one Subnormality comic...

pinkusponkus said: Squeak did so much for so many people. I miss him! 

Thank you! We miss him too!

kasamari said: I miss the care and love of the whole team you guys put together. I will keep following this and Squeak’s other spaces in the hopes that I get the chance to tell Squeak that the soldier who left his pregnant wife for training all those years ago is now a proud father of 4, still married to the same amazing woman. I will always be so grateful for the story of Good Night and for the wonderful Ponies in a Box that worked to share so many stories.

CONGRATULATIONS! Hip Hip Hurray! I hope we can all be so fortunate. =)

You didn’t ask for advice, but I’m gonna provide some anyway. My favorite parenting book is Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn. Also, conventional school sucks and kids would be much better off at Sudbury Schools: https://www.facebook.com/HudsonValleySudburySchool/videos/10155951019968804/ (The teachers are better off too!) Anyway, give your kids a hug from us. And maybe show them an old PIAB video or two =)

And hopefully, hopefully someday you’ll be able to tell Squeak the news directly. I’m sure he’d be happy for you. =)

warbalist said: I miss writing music for his stuff. 😭

Oh wow, you wrote music for him? (Sorry, I don’t recognize the username!) What did you write?

I miss working with him too. I miss the sheer sense of possibility we had in 2012, in the brony fandom generally and especially with Pony in a Box. I still remember how I was on vacation and Squeak came up with the idea for The Best and within 12 hours it was fully written, recorded and posted on Youtube. Or how about that time the other boxers and me secretly made a short for Squeak’s birthday?

I miss hearing our stuff premiere on Celestia Radio. I miss reading the comments as they came in. I miss the little ARG we did for Wrong Way Backwards. I miss the feeling that anything was possible.

I’m really sad that I didn’t go to BronyCon 2013. A lot of PIAB people were there, and in retrospect that was the best opportunity I ever had to see the boxers in person. But my mom had cancer and I had anxiety mixed with self-hatred and the flight seemed too much of a risk and it didn’t seem fair to mom so in the end I didn’t go. =(

I miss my box friends. Too many of us had IRL problems at the same time, and we gradually scattered to the winds. We’ve still got a discord server but it rarely gets any activity. It’s so sad. =(

Special shout-out to Togpie, who was a vital support to me during some extremely difficult times in my life. I think maybe she burnt out, caring for me all the time. If so, I don’t blame her. She worked really hard to help me when she was already busy with her own problems. I haven’t heard from her in over a year now. I hope she’s ok...

It’s strange how Life is so much grander and deeper than it seems. Do you know what I mean? There is so much meaning and passion and joy and opportunities taken and opportunities missed just in this one little group of people. There are so many things that shaped us, so many traumas that the Box helped us face, and then the Box itself drifted away because we still hadn’t found perfect solutions to Life’s problems.

And here I am, posting this little thing that a handful of people will see. How will it impact you? What’s your story?

A good life is possible, I’m sure. The solutions involve things like Children’s Rights and Sudbury Schools and Democracy and Universal Basic Income. The solutions involve things like ponies and fandoms and community for its own sake. The solutions involve knowing that you matter and your feelings matter, and it’s ok to cry when you’re hurt and it’s ok to get mad at abusive people and systems.

I think of the billionaires of the world and I wonder why they don’t just feed the poor. I’ve had a lot of friends who deserve money, good people tied down by bad circumstances. I’ve given a few thousand myself, trying to figure out how much I can afford considering I still can’t manage a full-time job (on account of my mental health). And I wonder why anyone thinks Elon Musk is a good person, seeing that he has so much money but he refuses to help people.

I think back to a time when guys openly liking ponies would have been impossible, when this fandom would have been impossible, where the formation of Pony in a Box would have been impossible. I wonder how many wonderful memories past generations never got to experience because of their stupid rules, and I’m glad for the progress we’ve made and the hope of more progress to come, and I’m also very sad that more progress hasn’t happened already.

Every so often I google anti-aging medicine (which is a legit field now) because I want to make up for all the time I’ve lost to trauma and abuse.

In the meantime, though, I’m glad we had Pony in a Box. And I’m glad that the fandom still exists. And I hope that the choices I make today will help future generations. Maybe new opportunities will come our way, like the TARDIS fading in from the Vortex.

Thank you, my friends.

Onwards and Upwards --Sonicsuns

[checkpointcherry]

hiii :))) i really enjoy your work as well as your fanfics on ao3 and we speak sometimes on discord although that server is pretty dead rn 😭 i came across one of your other fanfics that was called "this side of the wall" i really enjoy it, it's very realistic. i was wondering if you had any plans to continue it? please no pressure of course :))

hi!!

i’m so happy you like my work, that means so much to me no matter how many times it’s said to me <3 also i’m sorry my fruk server is dead, i don’t really talk on discord because it makes me self-conscious lol.

i really really would love to finish that fic someday, at least in some form, because it means a lot to me and there are so many scenes i dream of writing. the reasons i’ve gone dark with it are 1) enough of my headcanons have changed (mostly becoming neutral on gerita and headcanoning gil as aroace) to where i’d want to basically restart it, and 2) writing is just very hard for me. even my fruk oneshots that i think of constantly are very hard for me to write, so you can imagine the frustration when it comes to a 5k+ word chapter of a work that i felt needed to be the best it could. i have very bad executive dysfunction when it comes to writing, it’s agonizing. and it is a shame because i have so many little interactions and scenes in my head that are begging to be written down.

i am honestly unsure if i’ll continue it in the form that it’s in, a huge part of me does want it to be complete someday because the latest chapter (from like a year ago 😭) is probably my favorite thing i’ve ever written. it just took so much out of me, but i still replay those scenes i haven’t written over in my head because i do absolutely love them.

[itlivesproject]

hello friends! i suppose i should introduce myself now that the game is fully released: my name is sarah, but you will know me as the abel simp anon :) (also, in the q&a when you said you were desperate to find out who i am.. i actually lost my mind slightly because i admire you all so much, i couldn’t stop thinking about it😭, so thank you for being so lovely!)

i wanted to try to keep this as short as possible but i am known to ramble so hopefully that’s not too annoying! (edit: this ask is very very long, i just had so much i wanted to say, apologies in advance!)

firstly, i want to say thank you for being such a welcoming community - i’m pretty quiet and i don’t really share my interests much irl so to have this community means the world to me! i want to give the biggest thank you to you, the it lives project team, because without you guys none of this would’ve happened. i know it’s said a lot (but it’s true) how IMPRESSIVE this whole project has been from start to finish, i am honestly in awe of you all. from perfectly building upon already loved characters to creating your own, to your incredible world building and art (and i don’t even want to think about the nightmare that was programming all the many many variations), your storytelling capabilities are off the charts, seriously! i also want to quickly say that the few people who sent asks in about me made me feel so cool, like a tiny internet micro celebrity😭

i wanted to tell you a little bit about me! first of all, i’m british, so feel free to now read all of my asks in a silly little accent☕️. fun fact: i’ve followed lindsay for quite a long time and saw her original post at the very beginning asking if anyone would be interested in helping to create a third instalment… i actually almost signed up to be a writer on this project as i’m an english student and an avid it lives stan*, but i knew that with my schedule with college i wouldn’t have been able to give it the time it needed and deserved, but retrospectively i definitely couldn’t write anything as incredible as what you guys have produced, and as much as i would’ve loved to be on the team, being a fan has been the best experience i’ve had in a long long time!! *i am actually such an it lives nerd that i once made a powerpoint to tell my friend the entire plot of both ilitw and ilb, and she is eagerly awaiting for when i give her a powerpoint on the plot of ilw😭

i spent so many hours on friday unprivating all my ilw posts as, before this, my blog was completely empty of fandom posts, as like i said before i’ve always been pretty insecure about sharing my interests, and i grew pretty fond of my ~mysterious anonymity~ so feel free to see how long i’ve been secretly reblogging everyone’s posts for now that they’re public lmao

i also finally started speaking more in the discord yesterday (here’s to boosting your self-confidence!) and someone told me that’s how they figured out who i am, so i’m very interested in who that was and how they knew it was me👀

this project has seriously changed my life and i’m so sincerely grateful for everyone involved, you all have such a special place in my heart. thank you for taking care of ali, kassie, and sadie (my devon, harper, and rowan) they could not have been in safer hands🫶 (because i do not have it in me to do a disaster route, they are all ALIVE and HAPPY and abel and sadie will get married and live happily ever after)

so far i have cried 4 times in the last 2 days because i’m so devastated about this project ending, in fact i have an 8 minute long video i sent to one of my best friends just talking and crying about how much i’ll miss the game despite the fact that the community will always still be here (i’m just very dramatic and emotional in case you haven’t noticed that over the past year or so😭)

let me wrap things up because i’ve definitely overstayed my welcome in this ask😭 i don’t think i’ll truly be able to put into words how much this project has meant to me over the last year or so, and it has been an absolute honour to see you and your project grow and flourish. but most of all, it’s been a privilege to be your abel simp anon and it’s safe to say this is an experience i’ll cherish forever and never forget

-forever yours, with so so much love, sarah, aka the abel simp anon💓

(ps. this definitely won’t be the last time you hear from me, i’m clingy as hell😘)

Oh dear Abel simp anon aka Sarah ❤️❤️

First of all, we (especially I) loved getting your asks, it was always fun as hell to read a good chapter liveblog and I was always really excited to see your reaction to the Abel scenes (seriously it made my day) 🥰🥰

Also that’s crazy that you almost applied! I’m glad you enjoyed being a fan so much, we really enjoyed having you as one. And a fellow English major! That’s always so exciting to me 😂

I’m honored we had such a big impact on you and truly we’re so glad you were along for the ride with us, it’s always amazing to know someone has been a fan the entire time. Keep speaking out in the server and posting on your blog, we’d absolutely love to keep hearing from you! And don’t you worry, Abel and Sadie will be happy together forever 🥰🥰