#i’m running to catch the train every morning bc i can’t bring myself to get out on time

[chikoyama]

(( ... ))

[noritoshiikamo]

When you get time coul you do sickingly cute domestic hcs with a character of your choice, you can just straight up delete this is you don't feel like it. ~ embarrassed dragon asks

days of nanami kento, hc:

void, i know u asked for sickly cute domestic hc and i did but i cant help but twisted something at the end bcs i'm me and only pain is allowed ((jkjk void i'll write something pure sickingly cute later for you :* ) warning: 18+ minor dni, sexual content, public, eating out and thigh riding (mention of word daddy) if you read past the addendum, well uh mention of main character's death listen to beach bunny cloud 9 (slowed acoustic) for vibezz

i feel like who ever gets nanami’s heart wins at life

he would bring you flowers every time he gets home

“hello, i’m home,” you could hear his tired voice but when your face come in the view if him, he started to smile and he held the flowers to you, he wasn’t tired anymore

morning with him would be peaceful despite it being monday. you’ll wake up early, he would be sprawled on his belly, comforter wrapped around his waist with his face mushed into the pillow. your cat would be somewhere in bed, sometimes between his legs and sometimes on the same pillow as him; he loves your cat

he likes his coffee black, breakfast is just two toasted breads with spread of butter

when he kissed you, he tasted like toothpaste. you can smell his lingering fragrance from yesterday and his voice was still deep from the slumber

“good morning love.”

“coffee smells good today, did you do anything to em?”

he was shirtless you could see his back with his pants hung loose you could see his happy trails, glasses perched on the bridge of his nose with his messy hair as he took a bite of the toast

he leaned against the counter, his lidded eyes on you and suddenly you felt conscious, but you were in his tshirt and shorts and those adorable socks that looks like animal he secret loves

“you have work today?” he asked washing his hand

you shook your head, pointing to the laptop and sprawling paper works on the table, “working for home.” your body shuddered when you felt the shirt hiked up, his bare hand pressing against your waist, “good,” his voiced echoed on your ear as he pressed a kiss on your shoulder

how did it get here again? your back arching on the counter while his head mewling between your legs. his tongue is mean, it left burning trails wherever it touches, kitten licks along the sensitive slits before his lips enveloped the bundle of nerves

“kento, meetin-ahh,”

“meeting can wait.” yes it can wait until you were trembling, his arms around your waist and you were just begging him to cum and when you did he had no problem cleaning you up, eyes on you as he wiped his chin, sucking the thumb with a small smile

“thank you for breakfast, it’s delicious,” waltzing out of the kitchen with a wink like he hadn't started his day by eating you out while you sat there struggling to catch a breath

on tuesday, he took you for lunch, you went to his favourite bakery and he told the cashier that his girlfriend loves the sourdough bread their bakery made to explain why there's 4 loaves in his basket

he’ll get the same order everyday while you decided to go to the convenient store across the street because you felt like bread was too heavy for today's meal

“i’ll have another one of the croissant, she’s picky, she won’t find anything there,” he explained, pulling out his wallet

like he expected you came out empty handed, but your eyes lightened up when he held another croissant

“how did you know i won’t buy anything?”

“because i’m your boyfriend.”

on wednesday you would take him out for dinner, to that one sushi conveyor shop where they have happy hours for their sushi, its that type of night where you both get slightly wasted on beer, shoveling half priced sushis like tomorrow is the end

to nanami, money is priceless with you, no monetary value could compare to your smile as you feed him a slice of sashimi and the way i love you rolled out of your tongue when he grabbed your favourite sushi from the conveyor if she missed it

on thursday nanami looked restless. you sat at the sofa, him with a book on his lap and you going through your laptop with a cup of tea. “we have a mission coming, i’m escorting a couple of satoru’s students for their grading.”

you stared at him, cup barely got to your mouth, “you’re great, i don’t see any issues.”

“they are kids,”

you reached for his face, his face softened to your touch, nuzzling gently against your palm

“they’ll be alright.”

you squealed when he tossed the book aside, laptop forgotten on the carpeted floor and the cup carefully placed on the coffee table

your shirt slipped off your head easily while his lips never left yours

"you come back home to me alright?" you threatened, "or i'll murder you myself."

"i will, love."

on friday, nanami took you out on a date

he held your hands in the train, shielding you away from the leering men

he took you to a fancy cafe for lunch, he barely touched his food, eyes on you as you stared happily on your choice of meal

"what? is it my mascara? is it messy?" you wondered

"you look pretty today," he said, leaning to brush a thumb across your cheek

he took you to a bookstore, he followed you as you ventured through the long dimmed hallways, the smell of books overwhelmed him as his eyes burned on your back as you looked around for books, the loose material of your dress swaying around

well you did find your book, but he would hold it up high, a small smirk on his face as his fingers tapped on his lips; you got his point

so you held him against the bookshelf as you kissed him, books long forgotten, his hands under your dress as you mewled against his thighs

"let's go home," you begged but he held your waist tightly, bouncing his legs to encourage you to bounce against his thighs

"you can do it here," his lips traced kisses along your jaw, ears as you clutched his shirt, desperately rubbing yourself against his thigh. your eyes drowsy in lust, lips torn from biting too hard as you held your moans and the flexing of his thigh against your clit got your belly in knots

"can you cum for me?"

"yes, daddy,"

he smiled, "good. cum then."

you didn't get caught, but it was hard to stop people from leering at the weird wet patch on his pants as he swiped his card at the counter

you went groceries shopping, his head on your shoulder, arms around you and the trolley as you went down the isle looking for dinner idea

"what do you want, love?" his voice deep against your ears sending shudders down your spine

"anything you want."

he smiled, "well i want to marry you."

"is that a proposal in the middle of a cereal isle?" he laughed, but you can't stop the way your heart beating at the words he said. his lips pressed against the side of your face as he slipped a box of flakes in the trolley

you stopped the trolley, turned around to face him

he looked puzzled, brows up in question

"i want to marry you too."

"good, how about next monday?"

"deal."

but you woke up alone, the next day on saturday, nanami was long gone away for his mission

he left the coffee running, toasted bread and scrambled eggs in the pan and a note on a cup that said i love you, nk , his initial signed

you made yourself a cup of coffee, looking for the remote to turn on the tv

"we had lost contact with the shibuya train station, trapping approximately hundreds of people with no cell phone connection inside,"

the news anchor's word went in her one ear and another

where was nanami being sent to again?

you held his note to your heart, the coffee tasted too bitter for you today, and you leaned against the sofa

how's nanami doing?

on sunday, your ears perked up when you heard a knocking on the door

leaving the pancakes you planed to make, you wondered if it's nanami returning home from his mission

you felt slightly uneased, another set of knocking barged in, you said hold on and closed your eyes, telling yourself it's just your mind fucking with you

you smiled, feeling slightly relief as you twisted the door handle

"welcome home."

"hello, y/n?"

addendum

it was just not fair that the one time you decided to bring flower home to him, he wasn’t there to receive it.

but you’re used to it. it has been a year

all you’ll have to do is just remove the old one from the vase, add more water before arranging the bright flowers in the vase, before placing it back on his tombstone. your hand touched the cold stone, a small smile on your face as you kneeled on the grass

“hi, nanamin, i’m home.”

[alreadyblondenow]

Whenever the sun is hiding

“And I wish that she’s you. If we have met a little bit sooner I’d marry you. Why can’t it be you?”

Pairing: General!Kun x warrior!female reader, Mulan AU, enemies to lovers Genre: SMUT, FLUFF, angst? WC: 3,750k Warnings: this story is so asian because it is a Mulan AU, this is a time where women are allowed to be warriors, mentions of heavy training bc they’re warriors, cheating but... youll get it once you read it, unprotected sex, mentions of fingering, mentions of Kun fantasizing about the reader fucking him, fingering, a lot of kisses, slight exhibitionism, mentions of other idols A/N: NOT PROOFREAD. I’ll fix it once I have time. I just watched the new Mulan movie, (yes the one that was boycotted) and it was amazing. To the one who requested this... I’m sorry if you’re not asian, :( but I hope you still read and love this.

Under the scorching sun in the middle of summer, warriors are trained to be prepared of what lies ahead. The power of the enemy is quickly growing by every second and the young warriors of China, and it’s very young, new and ambitious general is not going to slack off until his nation is safe.

That is why he is very hard and strict with how he teaches the warriors assigned to him. So strict that every woman in his battalion went home after the first few days of training. Except you.

It is your incredible will and perseverance to bring honor to your family that’s making you stay and helping you go through each hard training everyday. And who would have thought that your perseverance and driven soul will make general Qian Kun hate you to the core.

But that’s not the only reason why he hates you.

One beautiful night after your night duty when you thought everyone was asleep, you took a bath on the river and enjoyed your time alone. Releasing your feminine side by smiling while watching the moon, catching flowers that fell on water and tuck one behind your ears. You were beautiful, the general thought.

So beautiful that he almost did not realized that he was peeking now and accidentally saw your breasts the moment you went out of water. He then quickly hid behind a big rock, careful not to make a sound and careful not to be caught. That night, he touched himself while thinking about you.

And that is why general Qian Kun hated you. Because despite being a successful general in his very young age, he’s still a man who can’t have a decent fuck when he sure knew he needed one. You make him sin even though he’s already engaged and every time he touch himself with you in his mind, he will always feel so guilty afterwards.

Who wouldn’t hate you for that?

“Wake up, wake up my general”

There’s that soft toned wake up call again with a faint image of a woman on top of him, blurry because of the sunlight behind her that hurts Kun’s eyes and made him squint, but he knew he was dreaming.

And then he woke up.

It’s that dream again. The dream of his future wife who had been matched to him a day before he left for his duty as general. What a pity. It doesn’t look that much, but Kun was so excited to meet her in person. But the girl has been visiting her in his dreams, and that’s why he knew that this marriage is a good idea. This marriage will be beautiful, she will be beautiful and he will have a quiet married life after this duty of his.

Kun got up from his comfort and asked his assistant if you had gone home already and coward away. “No general, Y/n was seen during the morning run,” the soldier answered.

“Bring her to me, I want to talk to her,” Kun ordered and then stretched is body before putting on his robe and sit on his chair, waiting for your presence.

“General, L/N Y/N is here,” the soldier announced and Kun commanded you to enter right away.

It was nice on the generals tent, cozy and not hot like the tent you use together with the others. His things were neatly placed, and he is staring right at you now.

“From now on you will go last with everything. Last in line, last to shower, last to rest after training. Except during meals, you’re first during meals but don’t eat with other men. Are we clear?”

“Yes sir!” Of course it was clear to you but you never know why? Did you do something wrong?

But the real reason is, after what happened the other night, the incident in the river, Kun can’t risk the other men to be distracted by you. Some men in the battalion are already matched and ready to marry when they get home, just like him. So he can’t tolerate sin now and raise cheaters during this training .

Or maybe he simply just wanted to protect you.

For you it’s alright if you’re always last, what’s more important is you’re not last when it comes to skills and fighting. You were always doing great in the field, and the general was always impressed by what you’re showing. He just can’t say it out loud because it will hurt his pride. But who cares if he agrees, you’re not giving up and that’s what’s important.

Knowing that you’re last to take a shower and to clean yourself in the river, Kun can’t contain himself even though he has been avoiding you for weeks now. Yes. Weeks. But all his great efforts are coming to waste because at the end of the day, he will end up thinking about you and well, fantasize about you fucking him instead of resting.

“Maybe you like her and deep inside it’s not just weird fantasies after all,” the second general, Lucas, said to Kun while he is busy washing his hair.

“Did you forget that I’m matched already and she’s waiting for me to return home?” Kun frustratingly answered back.

“No, I did not forget that. But you don’t know this fiancé of yours, and you have never seen her or touched her,”

“Sure I did. In my dreams”

“That doesn’t count you moron. Look, if fantasising is not enough for you maybe just ask her-“

“You’re the moron, you know I can’t do that. I can lose my rank as general,”

“Let me finish first” Lucas held up his big hand and waited his friend to shut up, “Ask her truthfully, be clear with your intentions. After all, she’s a girl too and maybe she needs what you have been wanting too,” Lucas explained and left for he is done taking a bath.

Turns out Lucas was right. Whenever you take a bath in the river alone, and made sure that no one is watching, you touch yourself quickly and relieve your stress in a corner. Imagining a man whose fingers are deep inside you and imagining that you two are in a hurry so others won’t catch you.

Then after a good orgasm, you just feel silly and desperate. Why do I do this to myself, you murmured.

“Next time do it behind that rock,”

A familiar voice startled you and instantly made you shy. Did he saw you touch yourself? How much did he saw or hear? Why is he here? Did he do this on purpose? Of all people, why the general?

“I’m sorry general. I should get going...” you said with shy eyes, covering your still wet body with your thin robe and avoiding the general’s gaze that melts you instantly.

“Can you join me?” he stopped you from walking away from him, holding you by the elbow. A gesture that you can read easily. The general is not joking and he meant every word he said.

By the time he left you to go in the middle of the river, you haven’t made up your mind but you aren’t leaving yet as if you wanted to accept his offer and see what goes after. What are expecting? A kiss? A good talk? A good fuck? Why does he want me to join him?

All these questions ran through your mind as you slowly untie your robe and let it fall on the ground, walking slowly towards to the handsome man waiting for you under the moon and stars in the middle if a cold river.

Whatever happens, happens.

“So this is your decision?” He asked you calmly, with a soft smile that you have never seen him wear. “We will never speak of this whenever the sun is up,”

You nodded slowly and he came close, grabbing you by the waist and lifting you underwater so you could lock your legs around him.

“Tell me, are you matched?” he asked, looking so handsome in his damped hair.

“I am,” you answered weakly but you already got lost in his eyes.

“All the more reason to hide what we have,” he said and started kissing your neck that felt so good. Suddenly the cold water became warm, or that’s just Kun sharing an unfamiliar heat to you.

Slowly, he walked towards the big rock he talked about earlier. Feeling the water gush to your body and his hand soothing your butt underwater while making small talk. Everything feels so wrong but so good at this moment that you can only let out soft moans and listen to his groans as he was busy kissing you and kept on touching your body. Kissing your breast and licking your nipples like you were some kind of cold treat on a summer day, and you did not miss how his tongue felt around your sensitive areas.

“General-“

“Kun. Call me Kun whenever were alone,” he whispers and started nibbling your earlobe. His hands started to roam on your inner thighs, holding you with one hand and readying himself to make his first move. “Don’t make a sound,” he said and kissed you on the lips. Deep and with tongue that you became speechless and all you can do is shut your eyes close and feel this two fingers go inside your cunt. In and out you feel him under water but it sadly it doesn’t do the job.

“I think it’s the water,” he stopped and groaned quietly, his frustration was obvious. Is he really desperate to fuck tonight? “Let’s go to my tent, what do you think?” he asks you.

“N-no. That’s too much. We can get caught, I think I’m fine for tonight-“

He cut you off with a smirk and chuckle, “No were not. Were not going to get caught and were certainly not yet done for the night, unless you really want to. I can’t force you,” and again, he gave you freedom to choose. But whenever he’s like this you can’t help but feel like you’re throwing yourself to him. You just stared at his eyes and traced his soft lips using your thumb.

“Lead the way,” you said. And you witnessed him smile from ear to ear.

Quiet and very careful, you and Kun walked towards his tent and made sure that no one will see you together. Good thing the coast is clear and if anyones is awake, they should be guarding the place like a hawk. The moment you’re both inside his cozy tent, he blew the candle so no one would see your silhouettes, and of course, you did not make any sound.

He walked you towards his bed and slowly undid your robe, swiftly removing it and making you lie comfortably on his bed. He removed his robe and went on top of you immediately, staying in between your legs while he spreads kisses on your body. But you swear, you wanted to see his cock to inspect whether it’s big or can it fit?

“Don’t worry, you will feel it in a moment. And it will answer all your questions,” he smirked in between kissing your left breast while kneading the other. “Do you like kisses?” He asks as he spreads some around your body all the way down to your cunt, teasing it with a few licks.

“Now I do,” you smiled and answered his question. Reaching for his head to rake away his hair and to see how his tongue works.

Incredible. As expected and you wish you could make a sound.

Kun went back up to you, searching for your eyes under the very minimal light, “You should be kissed often, and by someone who knows how” he whispered and placed a soft kiss on your lips.

“Is that an invitation for tomorrow night?” You joked and smiled through the feeling of him finally spreading your legs open and making you feel his cock slide up and down your wet slit, again, teasing you and preparing you for what’s yet to come.

“If you let me kiss you everyday then I’m considered the luckiest man on Earth”

Such sweet words you thought. But such sweet words are not easily said if you don’t like the person you’re with. In other words, you don’t know if he actually mean it or is he just trying to be sweet because he’s about to fuck you senseless now?

“Ugh- it wont go in,” he said frustrated but still quiet. He’s that big and you are that tight.

“Ahh- fuck I wasn’t ready” you almost screamed the moment he put two fingers in your hole to prep you more, making you wetter by every second.

“Fuck its huge,” you informed him when Kun finally manage to put a few inches inside. He just chuckled and lowered himself to kiss your neck, whispering, “its not yet even halfway in,” he said in a very sexy way that just took your breath away.

But before he fucks you properly, he made sure he’s looking directly to you not missing the way you will react when he finally move. And when he finally did you furrowed your brows and parted your lips shamelessly, letting out small sounds that’s for yourselves only. You look and sounded so beautiful and irresistible Kun thought and he knew right then and there that he will be addicted to you. Almost to the point of he can’t let you go.

“Please don’t get me pregnant,” you plead and hold on tightly to his shoulders and kiss him even more deeply.

“I wont” he said and spread your legs even more for a new angle. Finally giving you hard and piercing thrust that you don’t have any choice but to accept them.

The night continued as you two forget the world outside the tent. He did a lot of things to you. Completely maximizing his time before the sun appears. After the first wave of your sexual activity, to your surprise he flipped you on your stomach and made you arched your back beautifully. Spreading kisses on your back while he kneads your breast from behind, pinching your nipples and giving them a great squeeze from time to time... as he fucks you harder from behind that if anyone is listening outside they will already know what you two are doing in the dark.

And just as you thought that he’s done with you, for his final move tonight, his grand finale, he made you cum using his tongue with two fingers inside your cunt and his other hand busy kneading one of your breast.

“Your legs are shaking uncontrollably, are you fine?” He was teasing you. If you have the energy to punch him you would gladly do it but now you really can’t.

While you two were enjoying the quietness of the night, you snuggle beside Kun while he wraps his arms around you. Both staring blankly in the ceiling and both replaying what happened earlier in your minds.

“I don’t feel guilty, I hope you do too” he said out of nowhere.

“Surprisingly I don’t feel guilty either,” you tighten your embrace to him.

“Is that an acceptance for my invitation for tomorrow night?” He smiled. You didn’t answer him for it was far too obvious already.

By the time you and Kun parted ways before the sun comes up, you both instantly felt incomplete. Why? You managed to get back to your tent quietly and went to sleep immediately, Kun did the same thing but right now as you sleep like a baby, Kun was having a nightmare.

Not exactly a nightmare. But it was for Kun. His fiancé visited him again in his dreams, and even though he knew it was just a dream, he still felt ashamed that he cheated.

On the next day, as expected he was back on his usual cold and strict image like he wasn’t inside you last night. But as much as everything was bothering you and your mind was out of focus the whole day, you didn’t let your guard down still did what you had to do during your training.

“A fucking tiring day don’t you think?” Your friend Hendery whined and flopped to his side of the bed. “You were out late last night. Stargazing again?”

“Y-yes, I saw different stars last night,” you said with a smirk, confident that your friend won’t get it.

And as you did stargazed near the river that night and endured the cold, you waited for a pair of arms to finally keep you warm. And his lips, to kiss your tiredness away. But to your disappointment, he never came.

He didn’t came the next night. Or the night after that. And even the following nights. Until you got the news that he left the camp and went back to the city for serious business for a few days.

“You were just a past time Y/n. The general played you and how come you were such a fool believing that he actually like you” you frustratingly murmured to yourself while you thrown rocks at the river angrily.

“Tss. You should be kissed often, and by someone who knows how” you said mimicking his words before throwing another rock, “where’s my fucking kisses now!”

“I can give them to you know if you want it,”

Finally, the person you hated so much showed up. “Well, it’s too late- general, welcome back” you bowed and gave him respect even though you know he don’t deserve it.

“I’m sorry. Please don’t be like that,” he let go of his horse and reached out to you for a hug but you avoided his touch. “Let me explain and let me make it up to you,”

You shook your head ‘no’ without looking at him. And Kun knew that this was his last card, his last chance to make it right. “I like you and that’s the truth. I realized that now during our time away, and I understand why you feel like this. I’m sorry. Will you please forgive me,”

“You’re general Qian Kun, don’t beg for my forgiveness-“

“I’m not a general right now, I’m just a normal man asking for forgive to the girl I like,” he breathed in deeply and let it out heavily, “My guilt got the best in me for the past days but now... it’s clear that I can’t lose you. Not yet and not like this”

After that night, better days came in, forgiveness was given and everything felt a lot lighter. You and Kun stopped fucking just for the sake of feeding each other’s lust and actually taking time building your relationship. Secretly. But you told him that when it’s time to go home, you should part ways and bring honor to your families by marrying the people waiting for the both of you. He did not answer you.

Of course that didn’t stop Kun from falling in love, because even though you two are in the middle of a war zone and a very sticky situation, it was a beautiful time to be in love.

And when the war between the enemies was settled, Kun wasn’t so happy upon hearing the news because this means its time to go home and get married.

After you and Kun made love in his tent for a couple of times tonight, with tired and sweaty bodies you did not care and still cling to each other.

“Tell me about your match, is he handsome like me?” He asked you out of nowhere which is alarming because he never opened this kind of topic before.

“I haven’t seen him. I left before I could meet him. But I heard that he’s brave and he can do a lot of things and that he loves his mother very much.

How about yours?”

“I don’t know anything about her she visits me in my dreams but I never see her face clearly,”

“And?” you asked because it’s obvious that he’s holding something back.

“And I wish that she’s you. If we have met a little bit sooner I’d marry you. Why can’t it be you?”

“Why? because of sex?” You asked slightly offended.

“No, no don’t get me wrong I think about you even when the sun is shining brightly in the sky or whenever you have clothes on or your body is covered in armor and your face is full of dirt. I admire your natural strength and drive.”

“This is wrong. We agreed to go home with honor” you turned your back against him and thought about what he said.

“Tell me why is this wrong? We love each other-“

“Were engaged to different people... Kun, are you hearing yourself”

“You don't marry someone you can live with, you marry the person you cannot live without and Y/n, I can’t live without you” he explained sternly. Already mad but that didn’t stopped him from covering your exposed body with his blanket and leave a soft kiss on your shoulder.

“This right here, what we have now, it’s everything I wanted and more. In fact, I could die right now, Y/n. I'm just... happy. I've never felt this before. I'm just exactly where I want to be” he whispered but he sounded so frustrated still. “In the end I’ll respect your decision. But I’m not marrying someone I don’t know, someone that’s not you, I would rather die in war,”

If Kun was being honest, he thought you would chose him over someone you don’t know. He was beyond heartbroken when you told him you wanted to go home and thanked him for everything that he taught you in the field. Not even one mention of the special things you shared whenever the sun is hiding. And on top of that, you called him general before you say your goodbye.

And on your wedding day. You were wearing a traditional chinese wedding dress and wearing a beautiful smile because finally you will meet what your ancestors have matched you with.

But just like that cold night beside the river, you waited and waited and waited.... for nothing. For your groom did not show up.

For Kun did not attend his own wedding not knowing that you were the bride.

You were both completely clueless that you were meant to be.

[antiadvil]

i AIM 2 b w/ u

summary: Dan’s life is a little bit of a mess. He met his only friend through a chat website, and Dan doesn’t even know what he looks like. The only person he’s ever come out to is said friend. He’s wasting his gap year away.

But hey, at least there’s that cute boy he met at London Pride.

rating: PG13

wc: 4k

notes: for the @phandomreversebang! lovely art created by @anironsidh and betaing provided by @quackitity (also stay tuned for @judearaya‘s version which i betaed and is very good)

read on ao3 or under the cut

Dan glanced at the time. He had a few minutes to kill before he had to catch his train to London Pride, he decided, so he logged into his laptop and opened AIM.

His heart skipped a beat. His best (and only, if he was being honest) friend was online. He sent him a message.

danisnotonfire: hey

amazingphil: hi!!!

He and Amazingphil had met in a chat room about five months ago. They bonded a bit over their sexualities, and then Dan sent him a PM about Muse, and then here they were, still messaging almost every day since.

amazingphil: what r u doing?

danisnotonfire: im never doing anything

amazingphil: lol

amazingphil: yes u r >.<

amazingphil: guess what im doing

danisnotonfire: what

amazingphil: guess >:(

danisnotonfire: no >:)

amazingphil: pls

danisnotonfire: hmm

danisnotonfire: maybe

amazingphil: hurry up

danisnotonfire: wait im thinking of a good one

danisnotonfire: ok

danisnotonfire: ur running away from the police bc u stole the crown jewels

amazingphil: no u spork

amazingphil: im picking out an outfit

danisnotonfire: an outfit? :0

danisnotonfire: u wear clothes?

amazingphil: i hate u

amazingphil: i have Plans today

Dan glanced at the clock. He had to leave soon for his own plans, but he still felt a tiny bit jealous.

danisnotonfire: you have Plans?

amazingphil: yes

amazingphil: what r u doing?

Dan checked the time again. He frowned. He had to leave now if he wanted to make his train.

danisnotonfire: getting ready to take a train

danisnotonfire: g2g actually sry

danisnotonfire: c u?

He didn’t wait to see amazingphil’s response before he closed his laptop and bolted for the door.

The train ride to London was nerve wracking but uneventful. Dan had never travelled so far on his own before, and his mother’s warnings rang in his head. As tempted as he was to pull out his phone and pretend to be busy, he kept himself alert, his phone safely stowed in his pocket and his backpack clutched in his lap.

His mother didn’t know where he was going. No one knew where he was going. It was a little bit scary, but also exhilarating. He could do anything; he could be anyone, as long as he was on the 8pm train home.

When his train pulled into the station, it was easy to follow the crowd of people in rainbow apparel to the parade site. Dan’s train had arrived a tiny bit late, and it looked like the parade had already started.

The street was crowded, but Dan wriggled and elbowed his way to the front of the crowd, where he had a decent view of his first ever Pride parade. He found himself sandwiched between two girls holding hands and a dark haired boy who looked about Dan’s age.

“Hey,” Dan found himself shouting to the boy next to him.

The boy glanced over, flicking dark hair out of his eyes. “Hey,” he shouted back. “What brings you here?”

“I’m gay,” Dan shouted. He laughed. It was so exhilarating to say out loud that he said it again. “I’m gay!”

The boy laughed. “Me too,” he said. “What a coincidence.”

“What’s your name?” Dan asked.

“Phil,” the boy replied. “You?”

“Dan,” he said back.

“Well, Dan, is this your first pride?”

Dan nodded. “What about you?”

Phil shook his head. “This is my third.”

“Wow,” Dan said.

Phil laughed. “It’s not that many. I’m sure there are some people here who have been to every single one.” He nodded toward a group of older men riding on a passing float.

Dan tried to wrap his mind around the fact that there had been fewer than forty London Prides. That everything around him was new and fragile and still in its infancy. “That’s crazy,” he said. “That that’s even possible, I mean.”

Phil nodded emphatically. “I know, right? If I had been born just fifty years earlier…” He shuddered.

“It’s not like it’s that great to be gay right now either,” Dan admitted.

“No,” Phil admitted. He looked down.

They were silent for a few moments.

“Sorry,” Dan said, clearing his throat. “I kinda killed the mood there, didn’t I?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Phil said. He shifted uncomfortably, fiddling with the plastic rainbow flag in his hands. “Does your family know you’re here?” he added softly.

Dan shook his head, eyes welling with tears.

“I’m so sorry,” Phil said in a rush, “That was such a personal question, I don’t know why I-”

“It’s okay,” Dan said softly.

Phil hovered awkwardly just at the edge of Dan’s personal space. “Um, do you want a hug or-”

“Yes,” Dan said, immediately crushing himself into Phil’s arms and squeezing his eyes shut.

He resolutely ignored the tears leaking from the corners of his eyes.

“Shh,” Phil said, holding him tighter. “It’s going to be okay.”

Dan didn’t know why he believed everything this beautiful stranger said, but he did.

It was going to be okay. Dan let that message sink into his body, settle in his stomach, until his limbs felt less shaky and his footing more solid. He pulled away from Phil, wiping his eyes.

“Sorry,” he muttered. “I don’t know what that was.”

“It’s okay,” Phil said. “It’s your first Pride; it’s overwhelming. Are you from nearby?”

“I’m from near Reading,” Dan said.

Phil whistled. “That’s pretty far.”

Dan shrugged. “No one will recognize me here.”

Phil nodded. “I’m sorry.”

Dan shrugged again. “It’s okay.”

“Well, I hope you have a good time. It’s a lot of fun.”

Dan looked around at everyone wearing various different pride flags, all of the floats covered in rainbow. “I think I will.”

Dan and Phil stayed together for the rest of the parade, bumping shoulders and pointing out people with particularly funny signs. When the last float passed, though, Dan realized he didn’t want to break apart.

He turned to Phil to say so, but before he could open his mouth, Phil interrupted him, looking nervous. “Actually, um, if you don’t have anywhere to be yet, I thought we could hang out for a bit? Get coffee or something?”

Dan had left a few hours after Pride for exploring London, maybe even looking at some colleges so what he told his mum wasn’t a complete lie, but he’d rather spend them with Phil. “I’d love coffee,” he said.

Phil brightened. “There’s a Starbucks really close by. If you like Starbucks?”

“I love Starbucks,” Dan said. He loved anywhere Phil wanted to drink coffee together.

“Perfect,” Phil said, already walking, presumably towards the Starbucks. “My treat.”

“Oh, you don’t have to-” Dan scrambled to keep up.

“Please,” Phil said, smiling. “It’s the least I can do.”

Dan rolled his eyes. “In exchange for what?”

“You travelled all the way to London to see me,” Phil smiled.

Dan rolled his eyes even harder. “It wasn’t to see you, dummy-”

Phil gasped in mock betrayal. “It wasn’t?”

“No,” Dan said, “It was to learn and grow as a person, to find myself, to-”

“Shut up,” Phil said, giggling. “Just let me buy you coffee.”

“Fine,” Dan said, pouting.

“Perfect,” Phil said, leading Dan into a Starbucks, “Now come on.”

Dan’s coffee was delicious, but he let it cool in his hands as their conversation went on. He and Phil had a lot in common, and their conversation flowed easily. They both followed a lot of the same online creators, they had similar taste in music, and they had similar senses of humor. They even had nearly matching hairstyles, Phil pointed out with a laugh.

“It’s a cool hairstyle,” Dan said defensively. Phil didn’t need to know that the only way Dan could make it look even slightly good was by straightening it every morning.

“Of course it is,” Phil said. “It’s mine.”

Dan rolled his eyes and lightly shoved Phil.

When Dan finally finished his coffee, he looked at it regretfully. “I guess I should get going.”

Phil hesitated. “I don’t know if you want to go back to my apartment or anything?”

Dan nodded, then looked at his watch. It was getting dark out. “Fuck. I can’t. My train.”

Phil’s shoulders slumped slightly. “Oh. Well, can I walk you to your train at least?”

Dan smiled. “Yeah. That’d be nice.”

It was lucky that Phil had offered to walk him, honestly, because Dan was completely turned around. London was one of the most confusing cities he’d ever been in, but Phil seemed to know his way around it like the back of his hand.

“Here you go,” he said, pointing out the train station Dan had arrived at earlier in the day. He shoved his hands in his pockets, staring at Dan with an intensity that made him blush. “I don’t want to go,” he admitted.

Phil drew closer, and Dan glanced around nervously. There were a few people around. No one seemed to be paying much attention, but that could change.

Fuck it, Dan decided. It was Pride. If there was ever a day for kissing cute boys in public, it was today. As Phil leaned in closer, Dan closed the gap and pressed their lips together.

It was sweet, shorter than Dan would have liked, but as Phil pulled away Dan noticed a man standing at the other end of the street, glaring. Dan could see Phil looking too.

“How about I just stick with you until your train comes?” Phil said lightly, but Dan could see his eyes still on the man on the other end of the street, who made eye contact for another second before finally turning away.

Dan felt the tension in his shoulders unwind just the slightest bit. “That’d be great,” he said.

Phil hovered protectively by Dan’s side for the next few minutes until his train came. Dan wouldn’t be much good in a fight, and he didn’t get the sense that Phil would be either, but his presence was reassuring. When it was time to say goodbye, Phil opted for a hug.

Dan sank into his arms gratefully. “Thank you,” he whispered.

“Of course,” Phil whispered back.

“Stay safe,” Dan whispered.

“I will,” Phil promised, pulling back. “See you?”

“Yeah,” Dan said. “I hope so.”

Barely a minute after Dan boarded his train, his phone buzzed.

phil: did u make it?

Dan smiled.

dan: yes

dan: ty 4 coffee btw, it was good

phil: :)

phil: b safe

dan: u 2

He waited a bit with his phone out, wondering if Phil would say anything more, but he didn’t, so Dan closed his phone and put it away. He let his head fall back against his seat and turned to look out the window, watching London pass by until it was left firmly behind him.

***

The first thing Dan did when he got back home was check AIM. Almost as soon as he logged in, he got a message.

amazingphil: ur back!

amazingphil: where were u :0

Dan hesitated. He didn’t know why he felt like lying.

danisnotonfire: i have a life that isnt online u kno

amazingphil: D:

amazingphil: betrayal

Dan didn’t talk much about his offline life with Amazingphil. He knew the basics: Dan was gay, no one knew, everyone still managed to give him shit for it somehow. But he didn’t know where Dan lived, his little brother’s name, or that he had traveled to London today for Pride.

And if he said something about Pride, then he’d be asked how it went. And then he’d have to talk about Phil. And he didn’t want to talk about Phil for some reason.

danisnotonfire: u have a life offline too

danisnotonfire: remember u said u had plans 2day?

amazingphil: :0

amazingphil: i guess i did

danisnotonfire: howd they go?

amazingphil: good :3

danisnotonfire: is that all ur gonna say

amazingphil: yes :P

amazingphil: i need 2 have mystery or ull lose interest

danisnotonfire: :0

danisnotonfire: i would never

amazingphil: good

danisnotonfire: now tell me

amazingphil: no

danisnotonfire: ಠ_ಠ

amazingphil: :D

amazingphil: it wasnt really interesting anyway lolol

amazingphil: i dont wanna bore u

danisnotonfire: impossible

danisnotonfire: u could never bore me D:

amazingphil: i could

amazingphil: law

amazingphil: textbooks

amazingphil: school

amazingphil: math

amazingphil: r u asleep yet

danisnotonfire: (-_-)zzz

amazingphil: c? told u

danisnotonfire: ok ok

danisnotonfire: u win

Dan still wanted to know what Amazingphil had been up to, but Amazingphil didn’t seem like he wanted to tell, so Dan decided to let it drop. He started to type up a question about whether or not Amazingphil had seen a video uploaded by a YouTuber they both followed, but he was interrupted.

amazingphil: im kinda tired actually

amazingphil: i think im going to bed

Dan’s smile dropped. He had been looking forward to talking to Amazingphil.

danisnotonfire: :(

danisnotonfire: good night!

amazingphil: good night!

He went offline. Dan stayed online for a bit longer, but no one else was really there, and none of the chat rooms he normally joined were interesting that night. Eventually, he gave up. He went to bed early too.

***

He woke up the next morning to a string of texts from Phil. He smiled, grabbing his phone and rolling over to read through them.

phil: hey i have some free time this wknd

phil: i could visit maybe?

phil: if ur free 2

Dan smiled harder.

dan: im free :]

dan: idk why u want 2 visit tho theres nothing here

phil: theres u

Dan had to put his phone down for a second to make sure his face did not actually combust from how hot it was getting.

dan: thatd be nice :3 i miss u

phil: lol, we saw each other yesterday

phil: (i miss u 2 :3)

dan: call me? :3

Dan’s phone started ringing immediately. He picked up. “Why would you want to visit Wokingham?” he asked. “London is way cooler.”

“But you’re not in London,” Phil said.

“I can be,” Dan said, his mind already racing to find excuses for visiting again so soon. “I could say-”

“Dan,” Phil cut him off with a laugh. “I want to visit you. Calm down.”

Dan hesitated. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, Dan,” Phil said. “Why? Are you?”

Dan hesitated. “It’s not that I don’t want to see you again; I really do. But I mean, there are so many people here who know me and I’m not really out. To anyone. Except you.” And someone online, he added silently in his head.

“That’s okay,” Phil said. “We don’t have to- do anything gay if you don’t want to.” He paused. “At least not in public,” he added hopefully.

Dan chewed on his lip. “Even if my parents were out of the house, my little brother is really nosy. Sorry, I don’t think we’d be able to go there.”

“That’s okay,” Phil said, even though Dan thought he still sounded a little bit disappointed. “I’d still like to visit you. I don’t want to make you come to London every time we want to see each other.”

Butterflies erupted in Dan’s stomach. Every time? This wasn’t a one off thing?

“That’s sweet,” he said. “But really, London seems better in pretty much-”

“Awesome,” Phil said. “What time can you pick me up from the train station this Saturday?”

***

Dan opened AIM again, halfheartedly hoping that Amazingphil had come online in the five minutes he’d had AIM closed. He hadn’t, so Dan sighed, closing it again. He checked his twitter for another five minutes, then opened AIM again.

Amazingphil’s away message wasn’t even descriptive: “How much pain has cracked your soul? How much love would make you whole?” Just a Muse lyric. If it meant something, Dan wasn’t going to bother trying to decipher it.

Dan closed AIM again. He opened twitter. He closed twitter, and opened AIM. He repeated the cycle until it was time to pick Phil up at the train station.

Luckily, his mum didn’t ask why he needed the car, just absentmindedly handed him the keys and told him to drive safely. He parked near the train station, hoping he wouldn’t forget where he left the car.

“So this is Wokingham!” Phil said when he got off his train.

Dan nodded. “This is Wokingham.” Phil was disturbingly excited to be in Dan’s town. Dan wasn’t sure why, it was nothing compared to London.

Phil jumped up and down, smiling. Dan couldn’t help but smile back.

“So,” Phil said. “Show me the sights! Hear me the sounds! What is there to do around here?”

Dan shrugged. “Uh, I don’t really go out a lot. But there’s this coffee place I go to a lot if you don’t mind more coffee?”

Phil narrowed his eyes. “Is it Starbucks?”

Dan laughed. “Starbucks? You wish. Phil, I am going to take you to the indiest, least mainstream coffeeshop you have ever been to.”

Phil blinked. “Low bar, if I’m being honest.”

“After this, you’ll never be able to go to a Starbucks again without being disappointed.”

Phil raised an eyebrow. “Tall order.” He giggled. “Get it? Tall order? Because Starbucks drinks are-”

Dan rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t help giggling either. “Shut up.”

Phil’s tongue poked out when he laughed, Dan noticed. “Never. I will not be silenced.”

Dan shook his head. “Disappointing.”

Phil pouted.

Dan relented. “It was a little bit funny.”

Phil immediately perked up. “You think I’m funny?”

Dan rolled his eyes so hard they hurt.

Phil giggled.

“Shut up,” Dan said. “Let’s go.”

When they got to the coffee shop, Phil spent an obnoxious amount of time reading the menu.

“It’s just coffee,” Dan said. “It’s not that complicated.”

“It is absolutely that complicated,” Phil insisted. He ended up taking about ten minutes to decide what to order, and when he did it was the same caramel macchiato he had ordered at the Starbucks they went to in London.

Dan reached past Phil to put a wad of pound notes on the counter. “My treat,” he said. “Since you got the train tickets and all.”

Phil glared at Dan and stuffed a wad of pound notes in the tip jar.

Oh well. At least Dan could say he tried. And the barista, who was honestly a little bit cute, seemed very happy about it, so Dan was going to call this a win.

Their coffee was ready in just a few minutes, and Dan watched Phil’s face carefully as he took his first sip of his caramel macchiato. “How is it?” he asked.

Phil closed his eyes. “It’s amazing.”

“Better than Starbucks?”

Phil’s eyes flew open. “Now, now. I didn’t say that,” he said.

Dan snorted at the look of near-panic on Phil’s face. “Don’t worry, Phil. I won’t tell Starbucks you’ve been cheating on her.”

Phil rolled his eyes. “Thanks, Dan. You’re such a good friend.”

Dan looked down. Friend. He didn’t want to act ungrateful, but he had been hoping that Phil didn’t want to only be his friend.

Phil groaned. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

Dan looked up, confused.

“Sorry,” Phil said. “I kind of just got out of a relationship, and I know we live in different cities, so I don’t know if it’s honestly the best idea, but I really like you. And I want to make it work. If you do too.”

Dan smiled. “I think I’d like that.”

Their coffee date- date? Was this a date? It really seemed like a date- well, whatever it was, it went well. Phil admitted that this coffee was, in fact, superior to Starbucks. He told Dan a bit about his job- he worked as a video editor- and asked Dan about his. Dan was a little embarrassed to admit he worked at Asda, but Phil didn’t seem fazed. Before long, Dan was telling stories about all the outraged customers he’d dealt with, and Phil was laughing along.

Dan let himself relax a little bit. It didn’t seem like Phil was going to judge him.

They spent the rest of the day wandering around Wokingham. There really wasn’t much to see, but Dan pointed out all of the places he and his friends used to spend time, before, well, they stopped being Dan’s friends, and all of the little coffee shops and secondhand clothing stores he still went to.

When Phil got on his train home, he didn’t kiss him. Dan knew too many people in Wokingham for that. But Phil did hug him, tightly, and Dan whispered a promise to visit soon in his ear.

***

When Dan got back to his room, the first thing he did was check AIM.

Amazingphil still had the same away message as that morning. Dan sighed. Why was he so hard to reach today?

Oh well. There were other things to do on the internet anyway. Twitter was boring today, but there was always YouTube, and random AIM chatrooms where he didn’t know anyone. Dan lost track of time, chatting with someone he was pretty convinced was a fifty year old man pretending to be a teenager, until he got a notification that Amazingphil was online.

He immediately closed his other chat window; the fifty year old man would have to wait.

danisnotonfire: ur back!!! :D

amazingphil: lol

amazingphil: im back :D

danisnotonfire: was ur relaxing day unplugged relaxing

amazingphil: lol

amazingphil: yes

amazingphil: i had a good day :)

danisnotonfire: that’s good

amazingphil: i was thinking though

amazingphil: u know what’s weird

amazingphil: i don’t know what u look like >.<

amazingphil: we should skype or something

danisnotonfire: we should

danisnotonfire: when?

danisnotonfire: like rn?

amazingphil: sure

amazingphil: if u want

amazingphil: im not doing anything

Dan glanced around. He should clean his room.

danisnotonfire: give me 5

He glanced around again. There was no way his entire room was getting cleaned in five minutes.

Oh well. He had committed. He slammed his laptop shut and surveyed the room, trying to figure out what he could clean in five minutes. Or, well, what he could shove under his bed or in his closet in the next five minutes.

He managed to hide all his dirty laundry, then kicked a bunch of the clutter in his room to one side and pointed his laptop camera firmly away from it.

He opened AIM again, composing a message.

danisnotonfire: ok im ready

danisnotonfire: my skype is danisnotonfire too

He barely had time to open skype before he got an incoming call from Amazingphil. He picked up, then gaped at the screen in shock.

“Wait,” he said. “Phil?”

Phil blinked. “Dan?”

“What are you doing here?” Dan asked stupidly.

“Skyping you,” Phil said, just as stupidly.

“You’re- you’re Amazingphil?”

“Yeah.”

“And also Phil.”

“I think?” Phil extended his arms, staring at them, as if to check that they were real.

Dan groaned, putting his head in his hands. “How did we not figure this out?”

“To be completely honest,” Phil admitted, “I couldn’t really figure out what your screenname was supposed to say. I didn’t really know your name was Dan.”

Dan laughed. “What did you think it said?”

Phil blushed. “I don’t know!”

“No, really,” Dan said, an embarrassing amount of affection leaking into his voice. “What did you think it said?”

“Like, Dani snot on fire or something,” Phil said. “Look, it’s hard to read, it’s all lowercase-”

Dan groaned. “You thought my name was Dani and my username was about my snot being on fire?”

“Look,” Phil said, still blushing, “I don’t know. What’s your excuse for not knowing who I was?”

Dan felt his face heat up. He shrugged. “Phil is a common name?”

Phil laughed. “Not that common. Dan, you spork-”

“Shut up!” Dan said. “I’m not the one who doesn’t know how to read-”

“Maybe if your username wasn’t so hard to read-”

“Oh, blame it on me-”

“Look, I’m just saying-”

Dan scoffed. “You’re just saying.”

“I am,” Phil insisted. “Look, we both made bad decisions-”

“Bad decisions?” Dan said. “You think us meeting was a-”

“Okay, okay. Stupid decisions,” Phil corrected himself. “My point is, we’re here now. Isn’t that what matters?”

Dan had to agree that it was.

[letters-from-the-three-houses]

Hi! Loving ur headcanons for FE:3 houses! Can u write Felix/Annette (first time I saw them, they looked so cute!) and if possible, Sylvain/Ingrid and Ashe/Bernadetta headcanons? Thanks a bunch!!

relevant post:

no shade! i think it’s cute. imagine felix trying to get angry with ann—i bet he can’t lol

(with this, only 18 more felix/student pairs left to go. which one will be next?! ingrid to round off the blue lion girls?! claude for that sweet, sweet crack?! place your bets, people!)

and no problemo about the other two! i’m fond of them myself, so i already had some headcanons for them lying around (calling @that one claude/hilda anon that asked for a student/student pairing that i liked; this is it, friendo!). these are more pre-relationship, but feel free to request relationship hcs for these if you’d like!

enjoy~

felix/annette:

when they first met, it was chaos

felix the prickly loner who didn’t want to talk to anyone and annette the sweet child who greeted everyone she saw?

disaster

“hi! my name’s annette! i’m glad to meet you! all of the blue lions i’ve met so far are nice people so you must be nice as well and—”

he left before she could finish talking

she pouted about it all day long

it didn’t stop her from trying to make friends with him though

every morning at the mess hall: “good morning, felix! i hope you slept well”

at sword practice: “oh, you’re really good at this. maybe you can teach me sometime!”

in class: “wait, what did professor say? i didn’t catch that—did you?”

eventually, felix stops running away and just grumbles or lets out a sound to show her he hears her

but while he never continues any of the conversations, he also never tells her to go away (he just up and goes when he gets tired of it)

so annette babbles to him about random stuff

to onlookers, it doesn’t seem like he’s listening to her

but when he brings up a factoid she mentioned off-handedly the other day, she perks up and her heart turns warm

it gets to the point where every word that felix says to her gets stuck in her head

and she replays it whenever she thinks about him, smiling at the thought of his voice

on the other hand, felix’s frown starts disappearing whenever annette stops by to talk to him

sometimes, he’ll respond back

and he lets her tug on his sleeve

or he’ll pat her head when she does a good job

the other lions go ‘is that what i think it is??’ and get excited whenever they see them together

they don’t push it or anything—no matchmaking or the like

they just like seeing them together bc they think it’s adorable and it makes them soft

whenever annette feels sad because she messed up at something

felix will flick her forehead and call her an idiot, scolding her because “you’re going to get hurt” or “you’ve done it before. do it properly next time”

and when he gets too focused on his training, forgetting to take care of himself, annette drags him back to reality by calling out, “feliiiiiix! let’s go eat together!”

as they head over to the dining hall, she’ll sometimes cling on his arm

he doesn’t like it, but he can make an exception for her

ashe/bernadetta:

they first met while bernadetta was people watching

she was scribbling notes into her book: ‘lysithea - genius prodigy; tragic backstory because her superior intellect caused her to be ostracized by her peers?’

when ashe popped up behind her and asked, “hi there! whatcha doing?”

she shrieked, and in her panic, punched him in the face before escaping

when she was back in her room, she was utterly devastated and muttered, “what did i do? what did i do?” all over and over again

she tried avoiding him from that day on

but he always seemed to find her

in the corner of the library

the hidden alcove near one of the unused classrooms

ashe’s thief skills made it easy for him to sneak up on her unannounced and give her constant heart attacks

it turned her into a constant ball of anxiety that one day, she yelled, “stop doing that!” in the middle of the hallway

ashe blinked, shocked

and bernadetta, mortified as realization sank in, ran away and locked herself up in her room

she buried herself underneath the blankets and went on a self-loathing streak

“everyone’s going to look at me weirdly… i didn’t mean to… why am i like this…?”

it took the combined efforts of byleth and edelgard for her to come out again

when she did, she was afraid ashe would come out of nowhere and there’d be a repeat of the other day

but he didn’t

in fact, she couldn’t see him anywhere

she felt relieved but kinda bad because she couldn’t apologize for punching and shouting at him

still, it wasn’t her business anymore

(lies; she looked out for him everywhere she went)

when she caught him at the training grounds one day, practicing archery with some of his friends, she watched him for a while before scribbling notes about him

‘ashe - talks a lot. he’s either smiling or looking serious—there’s no in between. he’s likeable though… i guess’

eventually, he noticed her staring at him

and she flinched

but he didn’t come closer, just waved with a cheery look on his face before going back to practice

it was like a huge burden lifted from her shoulders ('oh, he doesn’t hate me’) and she left feeling better than before

ashe never walked over to her after that, but he always waved at her when they locked eyes—at a nice distance that kept bernadetta comfortable

each interaction they had, she grew braver bit by bit

and she tried going up to him so they could talk

the first twenty times were failures, but she inched closer and closer each time

ashe noticed them all but never called her out for it

in fact, he was tempted to just go up and talk to her again, but he knew she’d run away

so instead, he helped her out by hanging around corners and doorways, places where she could have a place to hide so they wouldn’t look at each other face-to-face

when bernadetta finally got close to a pillar he was resting on and called out an “um, excuse me?”, he peeked over to look at her, proud that she finally did it

but she shuffled over so they would be on opposite sides

so he stopped and said instead, “yeah? what’s up?”

she fidgeted with her sleeves. “i-i-i’m sorry for the other day. when i yelled at you. and when i hit your face…”

“hm? oh, that! i don’t mind. it was my fault for scaring you. i hope i didn’t make you feel bad. it was kinda hard, but i tried to keep away after that”

“…really? why?”

“you told me to stop sneaking up on you, right? so i did”

realization clicked. she flushed. “oh, thank you”

“no worries! i’m happy you came to me; i’m glad i can talk to you again”

she was thankful he couldn’t see her face. “wh-what? all i did was run away”

“yeah, but that’s because i kept surprising you. i think you’re nice”

“i’m not. not really”

“no, you are! a not-nice person wouldn’t say sorry for something they did before. but you just did.” he laughed. “it’s also kinda nice being together like this, don’t you think?”

she could feel her skin turn hotter. “n-n-nice? y-you—i—” as the feeling grew too much to handle, she stood up, embarrassed, and said, “i’m leaving! bye!” before bolting to the eagles’ dorm

within the comfort of her covers, she looked at the notes she had on ashe, hesitating, before she wrote down: 'he has a pretty laugh’

then she scratched it out and overheated under her blankets

meanwhile ashe, bright and cheery, whistled to himself as he wondered when he’d talk to her again

sylvain/ingrid:

sylvain flirts with her daily

“ingrid! you look as beautiful as you always do”

and she’ll thank him, deadpanned, before turning away and going back to whatever she was doing

sometimes, when she’s feeling particularly lousy, she’ll say, “i heard you the first time” or “stop”

it doesn’t discourage him and he just sprinkles her with more compliments because he thinks it’ll make her feel better

(it doesn’t)

ingrid always sighs over his antics but she doesn’t really care about them

she just thinks it’s empty flattery and ignores it

as long as sylvain does his own share of work, she’ll put up with it (and he does, so it’s her price to pay)

when sylvain gets serious, they make a good team

sometimes, she wishes he’d act like that all the time instead of being so…sylvain

but alas

he can wax poetry about her all day long

“your hair, sun-kissed, and eyes, beacons, draw me in like a wildfire i can’t look away from”

it’s really embarrassing, but he’s not that bad of a poet so she can’t help but be a bit impressed

she gets irritated that he spouts out this and that like it’s nobody’s business though, believing he should say it to someone when he truly means it

one day, she told him as much. “save it for someone special to you”

he just turned solemn—like he always did when he was in battle—and said, “but you are”

it left her feeling flustered; she didn’t show it though

(but from then on, she’ll catch herself staring at him as he concentrates, brows pinched together as a frown settles on his face, before she shakes her head and snaps out of it)

when he smiles at her, she’ll start to give him a small smile back

and when he takes her hand to kiss it, she lets him

she wonders what would happen if he offered to marry her

but she pushes the thought away and calls herself delusional

there are better prospects out there; she would never be a priority to the house of gautier

it doesn’t stop her from thinking about it whenever sylvain comes to talk to her though

maybe it’s just a dream

but it’s a nice dream nonetheless

[asks are open!]

[sup-hoes-its-me]

With Time III (Tobirama x Reader)

 A/N: hi! So this is the last part. I hope ur ready bc I wasn't when i wrote it! It’s really been wonderful writing for Tobirama even though I may have made him ooc a lot of the time. Have fun with this last chapter guys and thanks so much for reading!

word count: 4775

Part One/Part Two/Part Three

I couldn't walk the same after the incident. My leg needed to be in a brace for the majority of the time, and I had to be extra careful when I moved because my ribs and lungs were still fragile. I hated it. I hated this feeling of being useless to everyone and everything that I worked so hard to protect.

I still worked with the Hokage in his office, giving him advice, listening to his plans and strategies, and signing documents with him from sunup to sundown. It wasn't enough. There were people out there risking their lives while I couldn't so much as go on morning runs anymore.

More than once, I'd cried myself to sleep. I would sit in my apartment and stare down at my leg brace, the bandages wrapped around my waist, and the crutches in the corner, and just sob until my throat stung dry. How could this happen to me?

Part of me wished I could have just died in the line of duty than live on and get sympathetic looks from people I passed in the street. I hated the way my fellow shinobi, those who I considered friends, looked down at me in a way you would a child or the elderly. I despised the shame that filled my heart.

“Y/N, are you even listening to me?” Tobirama sighed as usual, red eyes lifting from his desk to me.

I blinked. “Sorry, Tobi. I was distracted again.” With a frustrated shake of my head, I went back to work on whatever was placed in front of me. A boring c-rank mission report that barely needed to be skimmed. Instead of going in to focus on the mundane  task of signing papers and reading poorly scrawled paragraphs, I felt a warm, calloused hand on the side of my neck. “Is something wrong?”

“I was about to ask you the same thing. You’ve been different recently.”

“I haven’t noticed.”

“It’s been months, Y/N, three whole months and you haven’t been the same.”

My words got caught in the back of my throat and suddenly my secrets were coming crashing around me. As much as I wanted to tell him how I felt, how everything was hurting me and I couldn’t enjoy my life like I did, I wasn’t going to mutter a word. My breath was shallow from shame and my cheeks paled out of simple indignity. My fingers fidgeted around in my lap nervously under his accusing gaze.

It’s a bit much to call him accusing. He was more concerned than anything, worried in a way that said he stayed up long nights with this on his mind. The bags under his eyes didn’t help my own assumptions. And if he were to be losing sleep over me, I would no doubt feel worse. I didn’t need the sympathy of the man I’ve come to admire, the man who despite having been a rival as a child I now saw as an equal.

“Listen, I can’t even begin to express the guilt I feel for-”

“Don’t pity me, Tobirama.”

His eyes widened just a bit before quickly narrowing. He stared at me fiercely, and I tensed under the touch of his hand on my bare skin, heat sinking into my collar and jaw. “I have never once pitied you, Y/N. Not even when the worst has happened to you have I pitied you. I know your strength.”

“Then why are you acting like this? Like you’re plagued with guilt, and you send me these side-eyed looks of sympathy when you think I’m not looking?” I questioned.

He took a deep breath, as if he were building up his patience or courage, I couldn’t be too sure which.

“I haven’t felt right since you got hurt. I’m not too sure how to explain it, but I feel weak. I feel like an idiot for sending you away with only a child as backup. I feel so guilty for not being there to protect you from all of this, because I can see that you’re in so much pain now that you’re crippled. I just-”

“Tobirama. Please. It’s fine.”

“No, it’s not. And I can never forgive myself for what I let happen to you.”

“Shinobi get hurt. Shinobi die in combat every single day,” I countered. He was the Hokage, and he cared about each and every one of his people, so why did he care so much about me, doing exactly as I was paid to do. I expected pain and suffering in this line of work, we all did. It was our sick reality. We trained children barely able to control their chakra to think sacrifice was good. Self-sacrifice is for the well-being of a nation, we were taught.,

His fingers tensed against my skin at the simple words. I watched as his jaw clenched and he turned to glare into my eyes. I no longer feared the fire in those red daggers. His firm voice broke the tense silence.

“You think I don't know that? Of course I know that my shinobi are going to get hurt and die in combat, and I can't do a thing about it. I've accepted that a long time ago,” he paused, sucking air through his teeth. “But it's somehow different with you. I can't accept that you might die one day. I can't accept the fact that it's not my fault you were attacked. I can't accept that it was you.”

I searched his eyes for answers. Something that told me what he was thinking. Only I felt like I was staring into the eyes of a man I barely knew. He looked pained. He looked desperate. Unlike the Tobirama I loved.

“Tobi…”

“Y/N, you keep me from being objective.”

I was completely lost. Lost in his eyes and his words and his frown that just itched to scream out all his troubles. “I don't know what to say. I don't- I can't,” I trailed off.

Softly, I reached up to take his hand, the one pressed against my skin. Then, I dropped it down into my lap, covering his hardened knuckles with both of my palms. My fingertips danced along his skin like feathers, but it was soothing. This feeling, of his skin against mine, it brought me back down to Earth if only for now.

Quietly, I said, “I'm sorry I've distracted you from your work. It's more important, I know that. I never meant to-”

“That's the problem. I'm beginning to believe you're more important than any of this.”

“Tobirama. Please don't say those kinds of things. You know you don't mean them. I'm your assistant, not your family...not your lover.” Deep breaths.

“I know that. That's why this is such a problem. I don't understand why I'm confusing my priorities, and seeing you here doesn't help,” the man groaned, shutting his eyes and grimacing. His hand squeezing mine.

“I'm sorry if my presence hurts you, Hokage-sama.”

“You know I didn't mean it in that way, Hatake.”

“I know. I just think you need to work out whatever is on your mind. You can't be stuck in the middle like this. It's only holding you back,” I said firmly, catching his gaze. “Just remember, your destiny lies with this village. You will have a great legacy, Tobi, but you have to be careful.”

But Hashirama would have said something else. Anyone who knew the pair well enough could have seen it. Tobirama's destiny was not with the village, it was something much less abstract, less broad and disconnected. Konoha was his eldest brother's child, Hashirama's destiny, and eventually his fate.

As much as I tried to avoid it, the inevitable crushing defeat of it all, Tobirama was the one I'd become completely entranced by. I needed him as much as I needed water and air. He was my destiny.

And I could only pray he could find it in himself to forget about me, this strange relationship we had between friends and lovers. It was dangerous, and I hoped he would make the right choice.

__________________

Tobirama chose his destiny, the one I wished against.

He couldn't keep himself from doing otherwise. He could have done what he thought was wise. What was best for the entire village, but he didn't. He must not have been thinking when he marched up the stairs of my apartment building in the middle of the night.

I lay in my bed, a book in my hand and a cup of long gone cold tea on my bedside table. The room was silent save for the loud gushes of wind to slam against the windows every few minutes or so. I stopped crying before I slept about a month before, and instead took to staring at the ceiling or rereading the pages of a novel mindlessly for hours. What else was there to do when sleep wasn't an option?

But a knock on my door was definitely unexpected. It had to have been around midnight or so when I heard that distinct series of four rapping knuckles against wood.

I stood, brushing down my old t-shirt, ignoring the way my hair stuck up in all random directions. When I opened the door, I was met with a fully dressed, fully awake Tobirama. He was much taller than me, especially when I slouched like this. I straightened up a bit and ran a quick hand through my hair to brush it out of my face and behind my ear.

“Tobi, is there something you needed that couldn’t possibly wait until tomorrow?” I asked, and the irritation was clear in my tone. I rested on hand on the doorknob while the other pressed into my hip, waiting impatiently for a response. I cared for the man dearly, but I wasn’t one to enjoy being woken up in the middle of the night for something insignificant.

“I could have waited until the morning if not for this terrible pain in my chest.”

“Are you okay?” My eyes searched his form for any sign of injury, but saw nothing. He didn’t look like he was in any pain, nor did he stand any different than usual. I reached out carefully and took his wrist in my small hand, pulling him into the apartment. I hoped to God that no one was watching the Hokage sneak into some woman’s apartment in the middle of the night. The scandals that would arise…

He sighed, shutting the door softly behind him, the click of the lock bringing me comfort. We were alone. I don’t know why, but that thought brought me peace and anxiety all bundled into one ridiculous package. I wanted to spend time with him, but not like this. It felt awkward, to put it simply.

I motioned for him to take a seat on the edge of my little bed, one of the few pieces of furniture I actually owned. As he scanned over the room and the walls, his brows furrowed into a knot. “After all this time, you still haven’t bought furniture?”

“I never thought it was important. Plus, I don’t get paid enough to afford those things.”

He shook his head, mumbling under his breath, “That’s absurd. If you needed more money, you could have simply asked me for a raise-”

“Tobirama, what are you here for really? You’ve somehow changed the subject,” I said plainly, looking down at his moonlit features in the darkness of my one room apartment. The only light was what came from between the drapes in my window, yet the moon was particularly bright tonight. I could see every detail of his strongly built face, structured jaw and stern irises.

He looked up at me for a second before turning his head down once again. This man was never one to back down from a fight, but today he seemed nervous. He seemed fragile in the way he averted his gaze and sat with his shoulders slumped forward unlike their straightly broad sort of way. Tobirama seemed distressed and worried; if only he would speak so that I could help him.

Still, I continued when he said nothing. “You said that you have a terrible pain in your chest? I asked if you were alright, and I’m not sure I fully believe you.”

“I can’t hide much from you, Y/N. I fear you know me too well.” He glanced up at me with a new goal in his eyes. I couldn’t understand what it meant, that gleam that suddenly appeared, but I knew it was far too important to interrupt. “We need to discuss what’s going on between us.”

And it was as if time has stopped. The fear that remained dormant in my chest was now pumping viciously through my veins. I felt my cheeks pale, running cold in a moment, and my hands start to clam up.

What was I supposed to say? How do you reply when someone wants to have a talk about your nonexistent intimate relations? My mind ran circles around all the excuses and pleas that I could use.

I whispered, broken at the edges, “I wasn’t aware there was anything between us.” Lies, of course. We both knew it.

“You’ve known for as long as I have-longer than that, I’m sure. You’re not an idiot, Y/N.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” I said, just as soft as before.

He leaned back, letting out a low exhale. His eyes rolled to the ceiling, as if he were raking through his mind for the right thing to say. He probably was. The Hokage never knew what to say in these sorts of situations. He was socially awkward, so oblivious at times that it hurt.

“I’m not sure what to say either. Just something. Anything to make this pain stop. It’s keeping me from my work, and it’s making me dependent on you.”

“You’re always thinking about me?”

“Yes, and it’s a problem.”

“I’m not sure what I could do to ease your troubles. I could never speak to you again, and you would be forced to forget me,” I suggested, although I would never do anything of the sort. It would leave me even more pathetic and incapacitated than I am now. I peered down at him, my eyes glimmering with the beginnings of tears, happy or sad, I wasn’t sure.. “But I’m not sure I could live like that for long, Tobirama.”

He shook his head. “I don’t want you to do that. I need you by my side. Haven’t I expressed that before?” So difficult, this stupid man. He wasn’t making any of this easier on me. “I don’t even know why I came here, especially at this time of night. I’m a fool for thinking this was something I could do.”

So fucking defeated. That’s the only way I can describe the sound of his voice as his coarse, frustrated words dripped from his lips out into the open. I took a deep breath, gulping down the terror I felt. I prayed he couldn’t see how terrified I was because I’m sure I looked pathetic. Nothing like a brave kunoichi, a veteran to the cause.

“Want me to tell you I love you?” I muttered in a voice so quiet I could have mistaken it for just another thought. And then, I held my breath.

He didn’t reply right away. He was silent, contemplative really. And I was at his mercy.

“Y/N, I-”

“It’s fine. You don’t need to say anything. Just know that I will always, unconditionally feel that way for you,” I confessed, suddenly not feeling as terrible. I knew he couldn’t just say something like that back. He wasn’t the type of man to just blurt out those intimate details on a whim. “You’ve been my best friend since you gave me those shuriken as a teenager, and I hope nothing brings us apart.”

“I hope for all the same things. I will protect you, if it’s the last thing that I do.”

“Tobirama…”

He tore down my soft voice with his own firm one. He glared up at me, snatching up my hands in his rough ones. He held them tightly to his chest, bringing the two of us only inches apart. “No, Y/N. No. Family is more important than anything, and after losing Hashirama- I don’t think I could handle life without you, too.”

He was so genuine in his words, and I had to bite my lip to keep from crying. Instead, I brought myself into his lap, climbing over top of him so my knees were on either side of his thighs. I kept our hands tightly clasped to my chest, but now I could feel the rise and fall of his breathing against me. I could see the specks of brown and gold in his crimson eyes. I could feel wisps of his white hair along my cheeks and forehead.

I pressed my face into his neck and sighed. This was as domestic as life would ever get, and it was the least I could do but to savour it with every one of my senses. To smell the musk on his skin, feel the warmth of his soul beneath me, listen to his harsh breaths. I absorbed every bit of this moment.

He released my hands so he could wrap his thick arms around my waist, tugging me to his abdomen. His nose found itself buried deep into my hair, soft sniffs taking in the scent of my shampoo. He always said I smelled like coconuts.

“Thank you.”

_____________________________

The day was long and terribly worrisome. Although I had busied myself with many tasks, nothing could stop the random tugs at my heart every time my mind shifted to my best friend who doubled as my strangely acquainted lover. I had waited for hours, on the couch at Tobirama’s house just for him to arrive home. I wanted to surprise him with a nice dinner and a few drinks of sake after completing the latest mission, one that seemed much harder than the last few. It was against the Kumogakure, who Konoha had been on the rocks with recently.

When one of Tobirama’s students, Uchiha Kagami stood in the doorway instead, I knew something terrible had happened. His deep black eyes stared over my shoulder so grimly, unable to meet my eyes. He was ashamed. I could feel it radiating from his form. I could feel many things from people, but this boy screamed pain, sorrow, and shame.

“What’s happened, Kagami-san?” I asked him calmly, even though I felt my stomach doing somersaults. “Where is Tobirama?”

“We were surrounded by Kinkaku’s Squad, and they had the upper hand. Lord Second, he…”

“Well?”

“I’m so sorry, Hatake-san,” he croaked, his voice finally cracking under the pressure. He looked into my eyes, the tears now rising up in the corners, sparkling in the candlelight illuminating the room. I shifted on my crutch, staring up at him with desperation in my eyes. I wanted him to say something else, anything other than the obvious. “He volunteered to act as a decoy so we could escape. I’m so sorry.”

My lips started to quiver. I couldn't come up with anything to really say. I could only muster out a pathetically miserable, “please no.” My knees suddenly felt very weak beneath me, and I was only really being held up by my crutch. My fingers tightly wrapped around the handle and squeezed so tightly it stung, and could have bruised.

But nothing mattered.

The tears that threatened to fall pooled up heavily in my eyes, and I hissed when the salty bits stung. “No. No. Please, God, no. Please don't.”

I pleaded and begged, my hand pressed to my mouth to muffle the cries. It was becoming harder and harder to breath. My head spun, dizzy and disoriented.

It felt like my entire life had been torn down in a single second. Every single thing I had ever built up was suddenly being crushed into the ground into thousands of irreparable pieces.

Tears streamed down my face thickly, hot and steady without signs of stopping. I didn’t know when I could stop crying. Nothing could have prepared me for the death of someone I loved more than life itself. Tobirama was the only person I had left in this damn world, and now I was alone. I was completely and utterly lost in this cruel world, crippled and sick and tired and heartbroken beyond fixing.

Kagami took a step forward and extended his arms, as if I needed to hug him. The only person I wanted to hold in my arms was Tobirama, and he was the one causing all this pain. It’s disturbing how misery works out that way. I shoved the boy back with all the strength my weak, broken soul could muster. He stumbled away from the threshold just enough for me to slam the door in his face.

Maybe that was rude and harsh and terribly uncalled for, but this death; fate didn’t need to torture me this way. To steal the one thing I held precious. Fate stole my legs from me, stole my mobility, stole my livelihood...and now it had forcibly taken the love of my life from my hands. The last thing that brought me any happiness.

I broke down on the floor right in front of the door, sliding down the wood frame and collapsing in a heap of shakes and quivers. I bent down so close that my forehead pressed to the hardwood, tears and slobber pooling on the ground beneath me. I grabbed at my hair and yanked it, trying to feel something other than this shockwave to my heart.

But nothing was going to help. The only thing I could do for now was scream and cry until I fell asleep, and even then, my dreams were not empty. They were plagued with him. Images of him constantly swirled in my mind. I woke up in cold sweats screaming or sobbing.

And I wasn’t the only one hurt by this. My ninkin couldn’t stand to see me this way. They knew me as a strong woman, one who could face death without flinching. Now, I was just a broken shell of the woman I used to be. I lost my father and mother, my brother Hashirama, and my best friend. It was only now that I was completely hollow to the core.

_________________________

“Hiruzen, did you get the final exam paperwork I dropped off earlier?” I asked, peeking my head into the Hokage's office where he sat over a stack of stark white papers. The man, one in which I watched grow into the great leader he was today, smiled and waved me into the room.

He peered over the sheet in his hand and hummed. “Impressive test results, Y/N. I have to say, you might be the most effective teacher at the academy.”

I nodded proudly, leaning on the wall to keep myself steady. I still had trouble keeping myself balanced at times, and I had pains shoot up my thighs randomly at times from the lasting impact the jinjuriki had on my muscles, but I no longer needed the crutch.

After Tobirama died, I left my position as Hokage's advisor. Instead I went to work at the academy where Tobirama dedicated much of his time and effort into creating. I didn't have to fight nor did I have to move around much on my feet. It was only simple stationary jutsu and chakra control, which I was still exceptional at.

Hiruzen was more than happy to have me help around. He was just glad I wasn't torn to shreds to the point where I could do nothing but stay inside.

“Thank you. That means a lot, really.”

“You're looking well? Is the medicine Tsunade made for you helping?”

“Yes! I swear that girl is miracle worker,” I laughed. The blond who grew up to be one of the most outstanding medical nin alive, produced a pain killer for me and it worked better than I'd ever dreamed. “I'm glad she picked up the medical practice. We really needed a good doctor in this village.”

“I heard you once tried to train with her?”

“Yeah. I figured it would be good to acquire another skill I could use without my full mobility. Turns out being a med nin is way harder than I thought,” I told him. “Props to Tsunade and the other nurses, honestly.”

Just as Hiruzen was about to say something else, the door behind me slid open and hurried little footsteps rushed into the room.

“Mom?” The soft, boyish voice rang out. “Kagami told me you were in here.”

I turned around, peering over at my 12 year old son, standing in the doorway shyly. He was a sweet boy, one of the kindest I'd ever met. It was the way I raised him, I suppose, and that made me proud.

He had dark eyes and gray hair that spiked in all directions. It was the natural way of the Hatake clan. He was tall, almost as tall as me even though he was just a child. He stood tall and proud, ready to impress. My son was a talented ninja, gifted even.

I worried he picked up some of my clumsiness or even my mediocre abilities, but it was quite the opposite. He was stunning much like his father. He moved with grace yet so much strength. He was reserved, but when he spoke it was never foolish.

“Sakumo, sweetheart, did you need something?”

“Yeah, actually. I wanted to know if I could go to dinner with Rei and Shikari?” He asked. I only nodded, rolling my eyes. He loved to spend his time with his friends, particularly a Nara and an Uchiha.

“Be back home before eleven, okay?”

He smiled triumphantly, even though I rarely told him no. He was such a good kid, I normally trusted him “Of course, Mom. Thanks.” My sweet boy ran from the room, waving to us on the way out.

I turned back to the Hokage sheepishly. “Sorry about that.”

“It's fine, Y/N. I actually enjoy seeing the child. It's like Lord Second is still with us in him.”

“Yeah. You're telling me.”

“He would have made a good father, I think.”

I laughed, rolling my eyes to the ground. I felt a pang in my chest. Yeah, I would have loved if Tobirama lived long enough to help me raise our son, to teach him all his talents and pass down the title of Hokage even.

“I think he would have been a disastrous father. Loving, yes, but he would have been so confused and lost. He never knew what to do with children.”

“Yes, but a father has a special connection with his own son, his own blood.”

“One day I know they will meet. And Tobi will be so proud of him.”

“I think he'll be proud of you the most, Y/N.” I hated when people told me stuff like that. When they mentioned how Tobirama and I used to be. When they made me fall in love with him all over again. I hated missing him every time they spoke in his memory.

I blinked back tears in my eyes and averted my gaze to the door. “That's more than enough, Hiruzen. Maybe we can talk about this some other time. Just not right now, yeah?”

“Of course. I hope you have a great rest of your day,” he nodded, wishing me the best of luck as I exited his classroom. And as I walked the empty hall, I swallowed my sorrow.

With time, I would see him again. The wait would always be worth it, as long as he remained in my heart. That's because Tobirama would always be unique. He was my first love and my last.

And that's the end! Did you like this kind of writing or hate it? Give me some feedback if you want and have a really nice day!

[tidsoptlmist]

It’s a Boy-Girl Thing - E.D.

Authors note: I’M BACK! for those who care: my holiday was sO MUCH FUN OH MY GOD!! I had the bEST time!!! sadly school has started again and i’m drowning in homework again!!! 

disclaimer 1: over these past few weeks I’ve received so many asks about whether or not I was still gonna update this: the answer is YES!

I hate the feeling of letting you all wait or maybe letting you down when i’m not posting as often as i (and you) would want me to. 

the things is that (and this might come as a shocker) actually do have a life outside of tumblr. I’m in my senior year of high school and I trying to get good grades, so I can get into a good university next year...

I do love writing this and I am so excited to continue writing this story (and more!!) and I will not stop until this story is finished!!! I promise ahha!! I see those messages as a compliment (bc apparently you all like this very much and want to read more) but sometimes they make me feel a little bad/stressed because i feel like I’m let you all down... so yea..... I hope you all understand! 

(what im trying to say is that i dont really mind those asks but at the same time it won't help asking bc YES i will be updating: but only when I’m able to...) (which will be regularly again next week!!!!) (promise)

disclaimer 2: this wasn't proofread so my apologies for any (loads of) spelling/grammar error!!!!! im a dyslectic assclown who cant spell to safe their own life so yea... just a lil heads up

Part 9 一 ANIMOSITY

Summary: Ethan and Y/N are neighbors. And although Y/N is on good terms with Ethan’s twin brother Grayson, Y/N and Ethan loathe each other and are constantly in dispute. Ethan is a populair varsity football player, who likes to be in the spotlight. Y/N prefers to stay under the radar, while reading books and poetry.

Although the constant bickering between the two drives everyone around them crazy - the two live their separate lives peacefully. At least that’s how it was until they wake up one morning and every had changed…

PART 1 || PART 2 || PART 3 || PART 4 || PART 5 || PART 6 || PART 7 || PART 8 || PART 9 || PART 10

You liked sports. You honestly liked being active. But not in late summer, when it was hot like an oven outside and the air humid.

You could feel the sweat dripping down your back, your shirt completely drenched. Your heart beat banging in your head and your legs shaking. You squint your eyes against the intense sunset.

Ethan had made you run around the field all afternoon. He had made you run laps, do pushups, situps and all different sorts of exercises which names you had forgotten right after Ethan said you could stop doing them. After finishing you had dropped yourself next to Ethan on the grass: completely worn out.

‘What are you doing?’ Ethan had asked.

‘I’m taking a break. Actually, not even a break: I’m done! I think if I continue I might get a heart attack or something,’ you breath still went rapidly.

Ethan just laughed while grabbing a water bottle from the cooler he had taken with him. ‘What are you on about? This was the warming up!’ He threw a cold bottle of water next to you in the grass. Your hands quickly opened it and you gulped down half of the bottle before glaring at Ethan.

‘I’m definitely warm…’ You mumbled annoyed.

Slowly you had gotten up from the grass and Ethan had made you catch footballs for an hour. The sun was now setting and your whole body ached. You fell onto the bench at the side of the field.

‘I don’t think I’ll ever be able to leave this bench. I can’t carry your body anymore Eth,’ you sighed and wiped your forehead with his shirt. It didn’t help much: your shirt was completely soak. Ethan stood in front of you, grinning. Silently you watched the sunset behind the hills.

‘Let’s go home,’ you said, getting up. You grabbed your bag and looked at Ethan. He was still smiling at you. ‘I thought you said “you were never gonna be able to get off that bench”,’ he chucked at you. You rolled your eyes, but couldn't help but let a smile creep on your face.

‘We really need to head home though. Grayson said something about a party this morning and I think he really wants to go,’ you say as you walk towards the parking lot where Ethan had parked your car earlier.

‘Who’s hosting the party?’ Ethan asked you, eyeing your in a curious manner.

‘Austin, I think…’ You say, trying to remember what Grayson had said this morning. ‘He said Austin invited you both. And that it would be a big party. Apparently his parents are out of town.’

‘You should go,’ Ethan says, as he opens the trunk. You put the footballs and bottles of water and other training gear in the trunk.

‘I don’t want to go,’ you say in all honesty. Ethan rolls his eyes as he closes the trunk again.

‘Grayson and I never go somewhere alone-’

‘Yea, that’s kinda weird: you two should try to being more independent,’ you cut him off. Ethan eyes you angrily - irritated that you cut him off, but ignores your comment.

‘Like I said, before you cut me off: we never go somewhere alone. If Grayson wants to go: you go with him,’ Ethan says as he walks towards the driver seat. You walk towards passengers seat and get into your car.

‘I don’t like those kind of parties! What do you want me to do while I’m there?! Also; this could only go wrong. Someone will definitely notice something’s off!’ You tell him, trying to convince him why you shouldn’t go to Austin’s party.

‘You can try talking to some girls?’ Ethan suggests chuckeling, but quickly comes back from his idea: ‘Wait, no! Don’t talk to girls! You’ll for sure embarrass me!’

You glare at him. ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

‘Y/N, you might have a 4.0 on your GPA but you definitely don’t have a 4.0 in flirting,’ Ethan laughs at his own joke.

‘I’m not that bad….’ You say softly.

‘You know what, I’ll go to the party as well. That way I can keep an eye on you so you don’t embarrass me too much.’ Ethan says. You give him another glare. Annoyed how he won’t trust you.

The field wasn’t far from your home. Ethan parked in front of the Dolan house and you got out of the car.

‘Do you need to pick an outfit for tonight too - or do you trust me to pick one out myself without embarrassing you?’ You snarled at him. Ethan looked unimpressed by your remark.

‘Nah, you’re good,’ he simply said, pushing a strand of your long hair out of his face. In the days that he had been trapped in your body, he had only wore your hair down. It was now that you relised it was probably because he didn’t know how to tie a ponytail with long hair. You huffed and walked towards the trunk where you got the footballs and other training gear.

You walked towards the Dolan house without saying goodbye to Ethan. You dumped the training gear in the garage and walked immediately upstairs. You grabbed a clean pair of undrwear and some basketball shorts and walked towards the shower.

You took a quick shower - the same way you did that morning. This time the towel didn’t drop and you got the underwear on in one go. You stood infront of Ethan’s side of the sink and sprayed on some cologne. You closed your eyes as you inhaled the scent: it was smelled very good.

You walked out of the bathroom and layed down on Ethan’s bed. The party wouldn’t start till 9:30 - so you had a good three hours to kill.

Before you really could think of something to do, Grayson barched into the room. These boys left eachother no privacy did they?!

‘E,’ he exclaimed as he jumbed on the bed next to you, ‘wanna play some video games?’

And before you knew it, you were walking towards Grayson’s room. It was practially the same as Ethan - but with different colored bedsheets and instead of a poster of a motercycle there was a poster of old looking car. You recognised Grayson’s Ford Bronco - altough the one on the poster was red in color. Grayson turned the PlayStation on and handed you a controller.

‘Dude!!’ Grayson yelled at you. You stared at the screen. “YOU DIED” it read in thic red letters.

‘I swear I shot them first! I don’t know how I died?!’ You said annoyed.

‘Why are you so bad at this game?! Did you lose all your skills while haning out with Y/N today or something?!’ Grayson said jokingly, although he stilled looked a little annoyed at you for losing.

‘No,’ you mumbed while restarting the game. Playing video games was more fun then you innitionally thought it would be. Grayson was good company too, chatting away about his day.

‘How is Y/N doing?’ Grayson asks suddenly. You huff, concentrating on the game, ‘she’s good.’

Grayson falls back on the bed, starring at the ceiling, ‘she looks good.’

His comment makes you forget the game and within a second the red letters spelling out “YOU LOST” fill the tv screen again.

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ You ask Grayson, confused. Grayson gives you a ‘like you don’t know what I’m talking about’-look. You gave him the ‘I-really-don’t-have-a-fucking-clue-what-you’re-talking-about-so-tell-me-now’-kind of look.

‘You said it yourself E: she has a good ass!’

You look at him in shock. It was weird hearing Grayson making comments about your ass - well just any ass - without getting red and flushed.

‘I never said that!’ Ethan would never say something like that about you!

‘Yea you did, like three days ago,’ Grayson says while taking the controller from you hands. ‘But don’t worry, I won’t tell Sophia tonight.’ He chuckles at his own joke. He walked towards the PlayStation and turns it off.

‘Is she gonna be there too?’ You mentally roll your eyes. Your energy level for this party just dropped to minus 6.

‘Yea, so let’s have some diner and get ready for this party,’ Grayson says as he walks out of his room. When he’s halfway down the stairs you hear him laugh and say:

‘and don’t forget to bring protection! We don’t want any surprises in 9 months!’

thank you for reading!! leave a comment if you feel like it!! 

please read the DISCLAIMER at the top!!

also: 

- i wrote a short grayson imagine but its not that good should i still post it???

- do you guys want me to make a master list? if so: let me know!! my ask

TAGS : @asapethan , @gabrielle-stark & @coconutethan here you go babes!!

[alteabellerose]

”*Putting this under a submit since this might be long and I don’t wanna split it up in several asks that Tumblr might eat. Sorry for any inconvenience*”

”I have some thoughts about the latest chapter. I was not expecting the feels to hit me like they did. But I actually understand why MC did what she did. How she did it was harsh and unnecessary, but I do understand the point behind it.”

-This is a fairly long submission but it’s also worth a read bc anon makes a lot of good points about this whole mess but I don’t want to clog your dashes with this super long post so I’m putting the submission and my response under a read more-

”Something I felt hasn’t been addressed a lot in the story is the fact that MC gave up her whole life to be with Altea. She literally left her own world behind to move to an alternate universe. For Altea. Someone who is willing to give up everything to be with you is a big deal and shows a huge amount of trust, especially in the messy situation they’re in with the Witch Queen and an approaching war. Then she learns that Altea, who probably felt like an anchor, has been lying about a lot of things. Even something as trivial as the fact that she’s two years younger than she said/implied she was. From personal experience, I can say that that plants a seed of doubt that is REALLY hard to get over. Suddenly you’re questioning everything and you feel all alone. Even if you aren’t.”

”Even more so if, like MC, if she feels like she literally has no one to turn to. She didn’t just move to a different city, a different state or even a different country, she literally moved into another universe where no one from her past is. Where she has no way to contact them. And we know that Chicago is where she feels safe since Altea told her to think of a safe place and they ended up there. In Chicago, she probably would called Sophie or her parents or anyone else in her life to confide in/vent. In the L&L world, that person would most likely be Altea, but this time she’s also the one right in the middle of a huge mess.”

”MC only spoke to Iseul because he sought her out. The guys had to bring it up because of MCs aggressive behavior during training, MC didn’t go to the courtyard with the intention of talking to them. In fact, the one MC ended up confiding in was Helena (which kinda makes me suspicious btw).”

”Then add the fact that Mireille didn’t make a good first impression by threatening MC. Or the fact that she shoves MC out of conversations by talking to Altea in a language she knows MC doesn’t understand. Or hijacking the day she and Altea should’ve had together. Or the way she seems to have a thing for Altea or at the very least she seems to disapprove of MC and Altea’s relationship. Then, finally, saving Altea right in front of her.”

”I feel like MC probably had Helena’s words echoing in her head about people always being tempted by those who have been with them since the beginning. How Mireille will know Altea’s heart and have memories MC can’t touch. It probably doesn’t help that every other conversations Mireille and Altea has is basically “hey, remember when….” which would make anyone feel left out. Then Altea says she wants Mireille to stay with them in the castle…”

”Basically MC is feeling insecure as all hell and the only who seems to get it is Helena.”

”Sidenote: Considering you literally pick between Altea and Helena and how this chapter ended, I just have to say: If this is the point where Helena’s route starts, I’m gonna be livid! I want a clean beginning, not MC running to Helena because she and Altea are having problems! Not here for breaking Altea’s heart for Helena!”

”Anyway, there’s a distinct lack of communication between everyone, which is turning this into a bigger issue than it should’ve been. MC’s insecurities are very flawed, but also very real. And from her POV, Altea doesn’t seem to want to understand. She feels like Altea doesn’t get it, but really how can Altea get it when MC doesn’t communicate her feelings. Its irrational, but doubts and insecurities will do that unfortunately. ”

”No one is innocent in all this. MC should’ve communicated her feelings/thoughts to Altea. The necklace was an immature lashing out that’ll only cause more hurt. But Altea should been more upfront, should’ve considered how betrayed MC might feel given the trust she had shown Altea and communicated her thoughts instead if just announcing something like the fact that she wants Mireille to stay and expecting MC to be ok with it.”

”I feel like Iseul should take his own advice and tie both Altea and MC to Reiner’s chair until they actually talk to each other… They both have some apologizing to do. And, more importantly, they need to freaking TALK TO EACH OTHER. A real heart-to-heart where they both talk and they both listen.”

Okay so I’m gonna open by saying that I never saw a notification for this so idk how late I am at getting to it and I’m sorry if you sent this yesterday or this morning and I didn’t get to it earlier

But! Yeah honestly I think you’ve made nothing but good points here. I think literally every day about how hard it must be for MC to deal with the knowledge that she left literally everyone and everything she’s ever known behind, like sure she loves Altea and the guys are her friends but she left behind her best friend and who knows how much family all for Altea and this war with the witch queen when she could’ve easily gone back to her old life, not put herself in danger every single day, not left 25 years of her life behind. I wish we’d get more about that in the story, even if it was just in the form of comments from MC sometimes, like when she was talking to the witch queen about her memories of the garden her mother had, except wherein she’s talking to someone who will listen and care

I know that I’ve been making a fair few angry/hurt posts about this and generally siding with Altea, but I don’t want to make it seem like I think MC is completely at fault for things. I can’t say that I’ve been lied to on that scale, but I can say that I can relate to what Altea says about her parents and so I also understand why she would lie about that at the very least. I don’t mean that I approve of it, but I’m not exactly mad. I am, however, pretty much entirely on MC’s side in regards to the jealousy issue with Mireille, I’m secondhand jealous tbh, and it surprises me that Altea was oblivious enough to the issue to suggest that Mireille stay permanently. Definitely was not happy with her about that.

The main thing I’m upset with MC about isn’t necessarily leaving Altea, it’s leaving Altea when she barely addressed the jealousy issue with her. It’s not that I don’t understand MC’s reasoning. I had a similar problem in a relationship when I was 16 and I stewed for like, weeks, but instead of, interestingly enough, returning the necklace he’d given me and I had hardly taken off in the year and a half we were together in a symbolic breakup gesture, we talked it out and lo and behold, we stayed together for a while longer. MC walked off and GOD do I understand the “she saved you when I couldn’t comment” because I kind of have a protectiveness thing going on and christ that’d kill me, and Altea just says “I don’t hold a grudge against you for that, it was just chance” but like, I’d hold a grudge against myself for the rest of my life probably and now I’m rambling so anyway, Altea goes after her and asks what’s wrong you know, and MC is like “I’m jealous” and then hands her the charm???????? When they talked about her feelings for all of two minutes?????????????????????

I’m frustrated with the lack of communication happening, and from the perspective of someone outside the relationship of course it looks easy to solve so I’m trying to avoid judging too harshly but god if they would just talk to each other! I’m also frustrated because I’ve mentioned on this blog that I’ve played/am playing virtually every game I can get my hands on where you can play as a girl and romance a girl, and god only knows how many bi/pan/lesbian LIs I could rattle off right now, but Altea is my all-time favorite. So maybe I’ve been harsh on MC for doing what she did but god I just keep thinking about what my favorite girl ever must’ve been thinking when MC put the charm in her hands and it’s killing me and kind of clouding my fair judgment here

Like. I love MC and I support her always (usually) but TALK TO YOUR GIRL!!!!!!! I’m glad you said that the lack of communication is turning this into a bigger issue than it should’ve been because that’s by far my biggest problem with what’s going on. It just doesn’t need to be this bad.

Re: your sidenote god same. I was happy when Alain’s route started and I assumed they’d do the same thing with Helena, like have it be an AU type deal where MC just happened to get picked up by the generals instead of August and Iseul, but now I’m scared. I wouldn’t be able to play Helena’s route at first. I’d have to emotionally gear myself up for it, lmao. Helena getting a route is literally a dream come true for me, as in literally I wanted it so badly I dreamed about it once before they announced it, but I don’t know if it’s worth the expense of Altea’s heart. That’s a cheesy thing to say about fictional characters but it’d hurt her so much. I couldn’t do it.

Catch me crying like a baby when they have their inevitable heart-to-heart though, I’m a sucker for this stuff

Thanks for sending this in, I could talk forever about L&L lmao & I appreciate your apparently slightly more balanced perspective than my own

[aiigonorus]

why not both?

pairing: eisuke ichinomiya x MC x soryu oh.

rating: mature. it’s nice & smutty.

requested by: just me, lmao. definitely send me a request if you have one tho pls!

word count: ~1700.

author’s notes: okay so this is my first fanfic, crossing my fingers that it’s alright! i wrote this while i was at work on my phone, so pls forgive any errors. anyway, i just had to write this bc every time i look at the picture below, i’m like “man i’d give up my ability to eat chocolate ever again if i could sandwich myself between them”. in addition, since they’re two of my fave characters, the idea of them both being totally whipped for MC & doting on her makes me really happy?? i’m rambling, just pls read it & let me know what y'all think! enjoy 😘

            we’re already on round two, my trembling body firmly straddling eisuke’s. a light sheen of sweat shimmers on my skin, long ____ hair tumbling wildly around my shoulders as wisps stick to my forehead. my lungs are burning, half from the exertion & half from not getting enough air, eisuke’s lips effectively cutting off my supply. his cock is seated fully in me, going so deep i swear i can feel him nudging against my womb. round one had been rough & fast, almost animalistic in its ferocity, which is what i expected from my ceo lover. but this time, he’s going slow, his hips barely moving at all from where they’re sitting on our bed. i’m growing frustrated at his cock hitting all the right spots, just without enough force to give me what i want & need. i try desperately to move my hips, but his fingers tighten on them, keeping me in place. “now now, baby,” he coos, smirking deviously. i whimper as he continues the tortuously slow pace, his lips moving down to my neck to leave a mark there. “who said you could be in control here?” that arrogant tone, as always, sets my teeth on edge. but as drugged with his sex as i am, i’m completely at his mercy, & we both know it; there’s no way i can return with some snark like i usually do. just as i think the torment is going to go on forever, i vaguely hear the door open over the sound of my own heart racing in my ears & i feel cool air on my bare back. he must be home.

            “tch. what, you’re back already?” eisuke doesn’t seem pleased, but that doesn’t stop his cock from driving into my dripping pussy. there’s no answer, just the sound of keys settling on a surface & a jacket being pulled off. i can barely get my eyes open, & when i do, all i can see is eisuke’s handsome, & currently displeased, face. but i do feel the bed dip behind me, & suddenly a broad chest is against my back. “i’m home, princess.” i automatically lean back into his warmth, my mouth still hanging open from eisuke’s thrusts. “think you can handle more?” hands slightly larger than those of the man currently inside me slide around to cup my breasts, fingers tugging at my nipples as i moan quietly. “i’m taking care of her, soryu. wait your turn,” eisuke snaps, apparent jealousy causing him to slap his hips against mine is a blessingly savage thrust. i cry out in response, nails digging into his damp shoulders. “i was asking her, not you. will you let me make love to you too, ______?” unable to form words, i simply mewl incoherently, one of my hands blindly reaching back to slide into the neatly slicked back hair of my other lover. as if i would ever turn either of them down, is what i want to say. instead, i turn my head, searching for a kiss. he’s pleased by my reaction, if his throaty chuckle is any indication. his lips take mine, the gentle nature of them at odds with eisuke’s ferocity. their opposing natures balance each other perfectly, like yin & yang; together, they make up the perfect lover.

            while i’m already tired, soryu’s appearance only adds to my arousal, & i know i can’t stop now. i moan into his deep kiss, eisuke echoing the sound with a hiss as my pussy clenches around him. i’m in no need of wooing or foreplay, & soryu seems to understand that, as he momentarily breaks away from our kiss to strip completely. there’s a twinge of regret that i can’t do that myself, or even just watch him do it, but that’s quickly washed away by the feeling of his fingers on my clit. i quake under the pleasure, one hand wrapping around both of their necks. it’s eisuke’s turn again to kiss me, & no one kisses quite like eisuke ichinomiya. he’s claiming my mouth, tongue conquering the soft cavern like he owns it– & he probably does. the wet muscle is mimicking the motions of his cock inside me, & it takes a moment for my hazy brain to register our change in position. he’s standing by the bed now, hands under my thighs as he wraps my legs around his waist. he’s easily holding my weight, the sudden help of gravity causing him to slide impossibly deeper into my weeping pussy. i almost choke on my own tongue in response until i feel soryu’s large hands trailing down my sides, causing me to shiver. then he’s softly pulling my pert cheeks apart, & i feel a wet finger breach my hole.

            the added sensation causes my eyes to fly open on a gasp, staring up at my beloved narcissist. my head falls back against a strong shoulder, finally managing to catch a glimpse of my beloved mobster’s face. both men’s eyes are narrowed with lust, though soyru’s gaze is just a tad gentler. “relax for me, princess.” i’m overwhelmed by both the sensations & being surrounded by the two most attractive men i’d ever met, but that doesn’t matter. my body is so well trained by them both that it’s already following orders, tense muscles easing so his finger can slide all the way in. another two are added in rapid succession, & i’m this close to cumming all over eisuke’s dick. soryu seems to realize this however, & quickly pulls his fingers from my ass. “you don’t cum–” “–until we say.” oh sure. these two bicker constantly & fight over my attention, but now they agree. damn men. my hostile thoughts are cut short when eisuke suddenly pulls out, only to return with a brutal thrust; this time, soryu’s cock joins him. a keening cry escapes my lips as the sudden penetration rocks me up, breasts bouncing against eisuke’s chest. a duo of rough curses can be heard after my cry fades away, eisuke’s hands tightening on my waist while soryu grips my ass. “fuck, you’re tight.” i moan weakly in response, my arms wrapped around eisuke’s neck for dear life.

            i’m now impaled on two throbbing cocks, & i’ve never felt so full in my life. my closed eyes well up against my will at the overload of sensation, but my tears don’t get a chance to fall; fingers brush softly at my left eye at the same time that lips caress my right, soothing away any unease. they give me a chance to take a breather, & i find the comfort only their arms bring. i nod after a few heartbeats, using my hold on eisuke’s shoulders to pull myself up higher. “move.” then they’re taking me, their hips moving in dominating thrusts i swear i can taste in the back of my throat. huffs & the sound of of skin hitting skin fill the room, my moans & the occasional masculine growl adding into the mix. they fill me so completely & are pressed so tightly against me that i can no longer tell where i end & they begin, & i’d have it no other way. i love the two of them more than anything, & while our relationship isn’t the norm, it makes me happier than i’ve ever been. & as i switch back & forth from kissing them both, i can tell they agree. the emotions flying in our little bubble seems to spur them on, their thrusts speeding up. each keeping a hand on me for support, one of their hands finds my clit & the other pinches my abused nipple. “cum.” my body is no match for the union of their hoarse voices giving me an order, & i obey, clenching hard around their members as i gush around eisuke’s cock. my scream fills the room, the tightening of my passages around them sends the men over the edge with me, their grunts & hisses like music to my ears. i shiver anew when i feel two warm spurts inside me, both my holes filled beyond capacity. 

            i wilt back against soryu’s chest, unable to hold myself up. they both pull out, my pussy twitching at the fresh stimulus of their cum dribbling out of me. with great effort, i turn in soryu’s arms as he lowers us back to the bed, nuzzling against his neck. he runs his fingers softly down my spine as eisuke leaves, the water running before he returns. he gently spreads my legs, dutifully cleaning up after himself & his friend/rival. he tosses it in the general direction of the bathroom, leaving it for the maid (aka me, i think with a glower) to take care of before returning to bed. i’m still basically a limp noodle, so they pull me up to the pillows, bringing the sheet up to cover the three of us. i sigh, completely content, giggling as they lean in to lick their bite marks; they each left one on either side of my neck, despite how i complain about not being able to cover it with my uniform. i suppose it’s only fair, i think smugly, my eyes trailing over the nail marks on eisuke’s back & the hickey on soryu’s neck. we just can’t seem to help but mark each other, it appears. i yawn hugely, & we get into our usual sleep position: eisuke lying flat, me tucked firmly against his side with an arm across his chest & one of his large hands wrapped possessively around my thigh. soryu is at my back, curling around me protectively, arm draped around my waist. i rest one of my legs over eisuke’s, the other pressing back to curl with soryu’s. tomorrow will be another morning of making coffee & omelettes, but for now, i drift off to a sleep, a soft “i love you” on my lips. i can’t work up enough energy to say a name, but it doesn’t matter; they both answer anyway. “i love you too, princess.” “i love you, baby.”