#i’m not even on shuffle and the genres r bouncing around so much THIS IS AWFULLLL i need to fix this it’s hurting me

[rainswept]

sunday playlist is a MESS

[strawbearytae]

stigma📎

“popular”! jungkook x underclassman! reader

genre: angst, hurt no comfort

synopsis: A lazy date between you and Jungkook is interrupted by Jimin. It would be the first time your best friend meets your boyfriend. The confrontation is already nerve-wrecking even without that fact that the two of you have your masks off.

series: part of my papercuts smau

———

Giggling as Jungkook proceeded to whisk the bowl though half the contents were stuck to his shirt, you continued to take pictures of him. After deciding to skip class (how responsible of you two) since the two of you had already completed the next two weeks' worth of projects, you and Jungkook decided to try the thing you were both bad at while the other teaches. Which was cooking for you and baking for him. The lasagna you made wasn’t too bad, a little burnt on the side because your supposed teacher for it decided to lay you down on the counter and make out with you instead of watching the oven as he ought to have.

“Yah.” Jungkook pouted as he blew a stray bang away from his face with a faux glare, “Stop taking pictures of me and teach me how to do this.”

“But this is so much more fun.” You smiled as you snapped another picture of his expression. “You’re so cute.”

You saw Jungkook’s face heat up with your phone, “y-yah! Don’t say stuff like that so easily.”

You practically grinned, “I’m not. I’m just telling the truth about my boyfriend.”

Jungkook bit his lip and looked away, obviously enjoying hearing you call him your boyfriend. For the last few weeks that the title had been given to him, he had been collecting those small moments when you called that. He always blushed underneath his mask before answering in a stuttering tone, which was why you referred to him as that in the first place. He practically obsessed over those little moments, replaying the slight roll of your r’s when you said “boyfriend.” Sometimes he wondered how “Jungkook” would sound from your lips.

“Yah~” You went over and clasped your arms around his waist, “Don’t look away.”

Jungkook continued to look above you, making you huff.

“Ju-Jaegguk.” You quickly caught yourself, “Please?”

“Hey Y/N are Mimi’s files on the coffee table-”

The quick shuffling of feet, the hasty voice, the door slamming open with the shoes clumsily thrown off moments before should’ve been a warning sign. An alarm to the storm that was about to unleash in your apartment, one that you could’ve avoided. One that you should have.

But you didn’t. And now you, Jungkook and Jimin were all staring at each other as Jimin reached for Mimi’s files on the coffee table. Jimin’s eyes bounced between you and Jungkook, expression shifting somewhere between confusion and bewilderment to a twisted gleam of realization.

Jungkook went white as he shifted his gaze at you. You couldn’t bear to return his stare.

Jimin was first to speak, “What is he doing here?”

You urged yourself to speak without shaking, “He’s my boyfriend.”

Jimin’s eyes furrowed, “I thought Jaegguk was your boyfriend.”

“Yes.” You nearly whispered, “He is.”

The silence was suffocating, Jungkook’s arms slightly shifted to grasp your waist. That move didn’t go unnoticed by Jimin.

“You’ve been dating Jungkook this whole time?!” Jimin took a step back as if the news had been physically blowing, “Him? Out of everyone in the world, him?” Jimin’s voice cracked into a shriek, “Again?”

“I didn’t know.” You pleaded, “We didn’t know. Not at first.”

Jungkook nodded with you in agreement.

“Since when.” Jimin demanded, “Since when did you know you were dating someone that broke your heart? Since when you decided to give your fucking heart to someone that broke your trust and literally pushed you into nearly killing yourself?” Your eyes widened, “Don’t act like I didn’t know, Y/N.” Jimin glared with glistening eyes, “I saw how you stopped eating and started obsessing over how you look. We heard your little mantra, Y/N. We all did. Tae, Miya and Yoongi hyung, we all noticed.

“Why...” You felt your knees sway, “Why didn’t any of you say anything?”

Jimin scoffed, sniffing, “You think we didn’t? How about all the times we asked you to stop going to the gym, that you were pushing yourself too hard? How about all the times that Miya coaxed you to get out of bed before you wasted yourself away from only leaving for class and exercise?” You saw Jimin’s fists shake, “How about all the times Tae, Yoongi hyung and I brought you food, complimented you, and tried to convince you to stop. The times that Tae requested you to make so many fucking cupcakes even though he hates carrot cake just so you’d eat one? You never did. You never looked at what we were trying to help you with. You didn’t even notice; you just mumbled your stupid mantra to yourself and pushed all of us away.”

Jimin was right. You never noticed your friends’ efforts to help you or little nudges for therapy. You had only been focused on yourself and presenting yourself as a perfect little packaged doll. You never noticed things beyond your own peripheral before you met Jungkook again. You were tunnel-visioned to fulfill your own delusion at the cost of your friends.

You were a shitty friend if you could call yourself that even.

Jimin’s voice went heavy, “And when we finally thought you were doing better, you’re out with this” he pointed to Jungkook, “Fucker again? After he started all this shit for you?”

“I didn’t know.” You whispered, stepping away from Jungkook to Jimin. Pleading him to give you a chance to explain, to apologize, “Jimin, I’m sorry-”

“No.” Jimin shielded himself, “I can’t do this, Y/N. You-” He let out a strangled sound before pushing his hair out of his face, “I don’t want to tell you what to do, Y/N. I love you. You’re one of my best friends but how... could you keep this from me. After everything he put you through.” He sent Jungkook a glare over his shoulder, you didn’t notice Jungkook lowering his head in shame.

“Woah, guys we’re gonna get a noise complaint-” Taehyung shuffled into your apartment, immediately freezing at the sight of Jimin’s angry tears. “Shit.”

Jimin snapped back to face Taehyung, “You knew?”

Taehyung curled his lips, “Only recently...”

“You got to be fuckin kidding me.”

“Jimin!” Taehyung called out after him as he stormed out of the apartment. He looked at you and Jungkook, “He’s knows?”

You bit your lip, “Yes.”

“Jungkook?”

“Yeah?” His voice was shaky.

“You knew?”

Jungkook lowered his head even further.

“Did. You. Know?” Taehyung’s voice had a dangerous edge to it.

“Yes.” Jungkook whispered.

“Since when.” Taehyung nearly snarled.

His gaze shifted over to you before they it went back down to the floor, “Since before Y/N knew.”

You snapped your head back to him, “What?!” Jungkook didn’t respond as Taehyung left, “You knew?”

Jungkook nodded hesitantly.

“You knew that I knew what this was.” You motioned to the two of you, “You knew?”

“Yes.”

You focused your gaze at him, tears of frustration building up in your eyes. “Why didn’t you say anything? We-” You took in a sharp breath, “We were just lying to ourselves, weren’t we?”

“Y/N, no I-” Jungkook reached out his hands for you before you smacked them away.

“This wasn’t going to work out, was it?” You leaned your head back before you looked at him again. His back was hunched over, and his hands were clasped in front of him like a disciplined child, “It was just a lie.”

“Y/N...” He pleaded, “I didn’t want to make you feel bad for me. I didn’t want to make you feel like you had to stay, I didn’t want to make you choose between you and your friends, I just wanted to wait until everything settled down before we talked-”

“What so you take away my choice to decide?” You willed yourself not to cry as angry tears pricked from your eyes, “You knew that I would stay, Jungkook. You knew that I would choose you and that would do everything in my power to make my friends understand. You-” You looked away from him, “You didn’t make that choice to protect me, Jungkook.” He opened his mouth to protest but you continued, “You made that choice because you didn’t want to be responsible, just like last time.”

Those last four words made him clamp his mouth shut.

Perhaps you were right. Jungkook didn’t want to be held responsible for spiraling your life. Like he did in high school, he didn’t want to make you choose. He didn’t want you to be brought into his orbit of insults from his ex-classmates or the flood of insecurities he carried. He just wanted to wait until everything popped, to be able to live like nothing happened, that there were no issues, before everything came to light. A part of him knew that if he talked to you, everything could have solved itself. But what guarantee did he have? His last experience with a relationship had consequences that lasted for the last 3 years. He only knew what an ugly ending was like, and he presumed that that was the only ending he deserved.

He hadn’t stopped the bomb because he expected the fallout as he did. Always.

You clenched your fists at his silence, “Jungkook.”

His ears perked at the sound of his name. His real name. But unlike the times that he imagined you saying it as you gigglrf “Jaegguk” with the slow, lazy “ook” that was laced with adoration, you said it with disappointment. With resentment.

“I’m tired.” You sighed, “I’m tired of us being like this. I’m tired of us not working out. I’m tired of the lies that we told to keep each other. We built so much trust in this, we invested our secrets and confessions but the very foundation of everything was a lie.”

“Y/N, please-”

“I don’t want to do this.” You cried, “Why was it you? Why did it have to be you?” You nearly pleaded, “Why is it always you?”

“I’m sorry.” Jungkook pleaded automatically, “I’m sorry, Y/N. I am so sorry.”

“No, Jungkook.” His name on your lips seemed to wound him further, “I’m sorry.” You walked to your room and shut the door.

He didn’t stop you.

———

32. stigma🖊

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masterlist

synopsis: flirting with your crush of 3 years wasn’t something you thought of when first getting twitter, a nasty breakup wasn’t what you expected either… but why is it that after 3 years and loads of droning on self-improvement and trying to become “that” girl, your gym buddy reminds you of the one person you wanted to forget?

a/n: Sorry if this is such low quality, I haven’t had the time to really edit these past few weeks. I have applications due in about two weeks so everything has been very hectic. Thank you to everyone who asked me if I’m alright! I’m not dead (yet!). Please hit that rblg button as a pat on the head for me for a good job (•ᴗ•◍)!

taglist❕

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[9tzuyu]

four months.

note: hiiiii! just trying to get into the groove again. i dont know what this is. the original prompt is below, however it did not turn out that way?¿ its kind of a mess, but fluffy i suppose. i hope you enjoy :>.

using my own experience so don’t think i hate poor people because i am those people </3

(also chapter 4 of children of tragedy will be out soon, i promise. ive just had awful writers block.)

+ thank you moli for proofreading so i dont have to. i love you.

warnings: none?

prompt: * reader used to be poor and stuff and w/n is like “you know you don’t have to get the cheapest things” and R covers it up and says “oh this is the brand i like, but w/n discovers hidden receipts and asks why they have a bunch of useless receipt and R is like “i was just tracking how much we spend....”

🏷 @natasha-danvers @midnight-lestrange @whatiziz @kermy48 @mycosmicparadise @peggycarter-steverogers @blackxwidowsxwife (lmk if you want off the tag list because ik i dont post as regularly as other writers, so im just going with people who have told me they want to be on my tag list in the past)

and lastly, for my baby @nermalina. its not really your genre per se [ i have a smut fic that i’ll dt you on ;)] however, accept this as a form of love.

it wasn’t so much that you were homeless and out on the streets, but you weren’t necessarily well off either. working as a waitress only got you far enough to pay your monthly rent and gas. somehow you managed to squeeze in a list of groceries.

every penny counted, you didn’t have room for mishaps or sick days. thats why you kept your budget small and a stash full of receipts on the kitchen bar.

natasha didn’t know about any of this though. you were sure she’d have you by the neck if she found out how long you’d been keeping your secret.

the redhead was generous, and no matter how many times you offered to pay for something she would never even dream of letting you. natasha insisted on it, and you were powerless to stop her.

it wasn’t until you tagged along with her on a trip to the grocery store when things began to unravel. she only needed a few things, nothing important.

but nat was quick to pick up on the fact that you continuously flipped every little thing you picked up to look at the price tag.

“here, it’s the cheapest one i could find.” you said, smiling as you handed her a cardboard box of pasta. natasha hummed, “you know you don’t have to get me the cheapest thing on the shelf.”

you bit your lip, eyes suddenly looking back at the shelf of different pasta boxes. “i know... it’s just- it’s my favorite brand.” natasha automatically knew you were lying by the way you began chewing on the inside of your lip.

she narrowed her eyes. “no it’s not.”

“huh?”

“you got this brand because it was the cheapest. you know i can afford more, which leads me to believe you do this out of habit.”

you shuffled uncomfortably under her gaze. “no, i just really like that brand.”

the sudden realization that she had never been to your place struck her.

“y/n?”

“yeah?”

“why don’t we go back to your apartment after this? we can just relax, watch a movie, do whatever you want.”

a mix of guilt and shame flooded your body. but damned if you didn’t still give it a try.

“my apartment’s a mess right now, you don’t want to see that.” you tried, offering a small, dry laugh in hopes of getting her off your back.

“you’re a terrible liar.”

“i’m not-”

“i picked you up from the park today, just like every other day. i’ve not once picked you up from your own apartment, so what are you hiding?”

when you didn’t give an answer, she tossed the cheapest box of pasta in her cart and walked away. you groaned as you watched natasha leave before catching up to her.

“okay, okay, we can go back to my apartment. just don’t judge me, alright?”

she smiled softly, “it wouldn’t even cross my mind.”

soon enough you began helping your girlfriend load her car with bags full of miscellaneous items. nothing needed to be refrigerated, so if natasha wanted to, she could stay at your apartment all day.

your leg bounced in the car as you gave her directions. but soon enough, after what felt like the longest fifteen minutes of your life, natasha pulled into a parking space right outside your door.

you silently cursed yourself for not renting a spot upstairs. at least then it would’ve prolonged the situation just a little bit longer.

natasha watched as you fumbled with your keys, your hands visibly shaking.

“fuck.” you mumbled after hearing the clank of metal hit the ground. you bent down to pick them up but natasha beat you to it.

“which key?” her voice was soft.

“the yellow one.”

the door swung open and you motioned for natasha to go before you.

it wasn’t bad, really. apart from the chipped brown walls, the lingering smell of cigarette smoke (you hated your neighbors for that), the broken windows, lack of space and furniture that was as good as the floor.

natasha noticed the windows first, a sense of protectiveness overpowering her. she didn’t like that you weren’t safe.

you went to offer her a water bottle, but she wasn’t paying attention. instead, she noticed the lack of food in your fridge, frowning when you tried to cover it up.

another few minutes of her silence went by and you couldn’t take it anymore.

“look, i know you’re rich. i know you like to have luxury brands and that you don’t have to worry about whether or not someone will break in and steal what little you have left. but that doesn’t give you any right to judge me. i’m sorry i don’t live up to your expectations.”

natasha licked her lips and leaned her back against the kitchen counter.

“how long have you lived like this?”

her question caught you off guard, but you managed to find an answer.

“i’ve always lived like this, nat.”

she nodded solemnly before abruptly turning around to look at what was inside your cabinets.

“what are you do-”

“you have no food.”

you sighed, “well yeah, i can’t really afford it.”

“and the receipts?”

natasha was met with a shrug. “have to keep track of everything somehow.”

she stared at you a minute longer before finding the exact words she wanted to say.

“i would never judge you, or anyone for that matter, on their living situation. i know people don’t always have a say in what or why things happen.” she paused. “but i don’t like knowing you go to sleep every night with broken windows practically inviting anyone to come in and intrude. i don’t like knowing all you have to eat is bread, canned fruit and grilled cheese sandwiches.”

you listened to her ramble on, still nervous about the fact that this was new to her.

“so come live with me.”

“natasha-”

“come live with me.”

you immediately shook your head. “no, no, no. nat don’t even-”

“i’m serious. you won't win this argument, y/n. let me take care of you. i don't mind picking you up and dragging you out of here myself if that’s what it takes.”

a sigh left your lips as you folded your arms across your chest. “natasha, i can’t have you do that. i’m okay, i promise.”

the redhead raised her eyebrow. “how many times have you gone to bed hungry? or let your car run on fumes for as long as you could? and how many times have you gone to work sick because you can’t afford to miss one single day?”

when natasha was met with no reply she moved closer to you, wrapping her arms around your waist, pulling you into her embrace.

“i know it’s only been four months but i don’t think i could ever forgive myself if something happened to you and i didn’t do enough to stop it.”

she kissed the side of your head, “let me take care of you.”

[minshookie]

High Ransom.

Pairing |Mafia!BTS x innocent!reader

Genre | smut, angst, dark themed, mafia AU.

Summary | “They all knew your mothers word was good for nothing, she’d never pay it back. So they settled for a painful compromise.”

!warnings! Please read this before reading the fic| 18+ mature language, perverse actions, virginity loss, violent sex, anal sex, oral fem and male receiving, financial struggle, parent death, strict and neglecting mother, cum eating, darcyphilia, urolagnia,slight hate-fuck,reader insert is of age, extremely naive & innocent insert. I do not agree or support any actions depicted in this fictional work,rape. !!NON-CON!! !!non-con!!

| this is not in anyway shape or form a true depiction or representation of BTS, this is a work of fiction and is not to be taken seriously. For entertainment purposes only.|

(this is my work, please don’t repost or steal)

Requested [open for request] words: 4k.

A/N: 200 Follwers?! Hi, I love y’all sm 🤧. But on a serious note, this is the filthiest thing I’ve ever written, I warned y’all. Also the longest one of written yet. I hope it isn’t too much :’) please excuse any mistakes or grammatical errors.

Could they be running late? Shivering you sat in the windowsill towel wrapped around you keeping a sharp eye for their large dark SUV you loved so dearly. They were supposed to be here today, right? Getting up you stretch your legs going to look at your heavily decorated calendar,‘Friends Day!!’ In bright pink informed you, yes indeed they were to be here today.

A smile crept on your face, the confirmation made you feel giddy, the thought of seeing them again made you excited beyond belief. “Y/n I just know you’re dressed and not dripping all over the carpet!” Your mother teased from the living room. You swore she had cameras on you, unraveling yourself you chose one of the few outfits she had put together for you for guest appearances. Closing the curtains, making them look as casual as you could. You then sat on the bed waiting for her to come inspect, counting her footsteps along the creaking wood floors. She crept into your room, a stern expression on her face, you could tell she was stressed with nothing positive to say she mumbled “Stop pulling that face you look exactly like your father.”

You stood from the drab mattress choosing not to respond, “wet spot on the floor?! What’d I tell you to do?!” You hung your head, why must she always scold you. “You told me to get dressed Momma.” She sighed, “and you chose to come in here and prance around, flood the floors and dilly dally instead!” You studied the minuscule dark spots on the carpet, “they’ll dry momma.” You whispered under your breath hoping she wouldn’t decipher your response.

“Excuse me?” She griped your cheek in a pinch making you pull your head up to face her. She took a step back releasing your face, she sucked her teeth in disapproval. “Y/n you’ll have stay in here, that dress has gotten too short on you.” She knew her words hurt you, seeing the boys was the only thing you looked forward to every month. Their attention sometimes felt like your only reason to go forward, to avoid conflict with your mother, their presence being a type of reward. She turned to go and your vision began to blur, tears warmly cascade your plumped cheek.

Leaving you alone in the room, you resume your position in the windowsill moving the curtains just enough to peak. Still no sign of them, maybe they’d given up on the money, left you for good and you couldn’t blame them. If you could leave you would too. At that moment all hopes were given up, no longer keeping an eye out you began to daydream... at least Momma would be happier no longer having to worry about the escalating debt.

Sulking in loneliness you barely noticed a white SUV pulling into their usual cut....whose this? You opened the curtains repositioning,hands in the glass knees on the jagged wood of the windowsill bench. Couldn’t be, oh but it was! You bounced like a hyperactive child, Hoseok climbed from the drivers seat handsomely waving directly at you. They all followed offering you waves and air kisses making both your stomach and heart do flips. Tumbling from the bench you run to your door eccentric to get your fix of attention, affection, friendship.

“Get back y/n, what did I say?” She was waiting for you to break her command, she knew you’d forget. “To stay in my ro-” “so why don’t you do as told for once?” You fought the bitter tears as they knocked on the door, You shuffled back into your cage of room like a kicked puppy. Shutting the door you sat on the floor compressing your ear along the hard wood.

“Ah, welcome! Come in take a seat can I get you a drink or a meal? Anything really.” She spoke with a quiver, she had nothing to pay them back with absolute zilch. “Where’s y/n?” You smiled warmly, that voice had to be Taehyung. “She’s in bed sick.” “Sick, she looked alright from the window.” Hoseok you idiot. “I’m sorry... you saw her through the window?”

“Ah Ah, we didn’t come to talk about the build of y/n’s room you know what he want.” Jin was all serous business, the room was silent. “Next month for sure.” She lied right through her teeth and they all knew it. “You said that last month, and the month before, and the month before that.” You held your breath, you hated it when they bickered she honestly didn’t have the money you two only lived in this house because it was your father’s property, and everything you got just by luck and the skin of your teeth. She simply couldn’t afford to borrow anymore, as the boys began to add impossible interest.

“Listen, we’ve let you off the hook because of your circumstances,we had a soft spot, we held you at a respect for your strength...but now the well is drying up on patience and your debt is growing into a monstrosity.” Namjoon gave his spiel

“Your husband may be dead, but honey you’re next if this money doesn’t turn up...and the plans they have for y/n aren’t cute, if you had any decency you’d get your ass off that insurance money and pay up, don’t forget you pay for protection and soon you’re going to start getting what you pay for.” Yoongi was rude whenever he came to collect, almost never staying for the excuses once ‘no’ or ‘later’ was uttered he’d head for the door, but today he decided to do otherwise.

The room fell quiet, and though your mother was cold and not much of a mother at all to you it pained you to hear her sobs and sniffing. You could tell the words being thrown at her stung her deeply. Curious to what was going on behind your door you decided to have a peak, and apparently you weren’t too good at sneaking. Your door cracked ajar, as if he knew it would happen you made direct eye contact with Taehyung.

“Boys I-I don’t know what you want from me you know the money isn’t in my possession right n-” “y/n! Come out from hiding kitten!” Opening the door you stood reading the room, your mothers face glistening, you know better than to disobey on purpose. “It’s ok y/n c’mon we want to see you.” Joon’s smile is so captivating his voice so relaxing, but your mothers gaze killed its power. “C’mon tell her she can come out.” Jin orders and your mother complies by giving you a nod of permission, sniffing over her concealed cries. It ached your but you were too excited to comfort her as you quickly escaped your confines.

“Ohh look at your pretty dress, come sit.” Taehyung pulled you onto his lap, “isn’t it pretty boys?” He pulled the fringes that decorated the bottom, barely reaching you mid thigh. “Everything’s beautiful on our y/n.” Jimin agrees, greeting you with a flirtatious wink. Making you smile into Taehyung’s chest. “Bashful girl.” His large hand rubbed your back soothingly.

“This delicate little thing around all those men with no one to help her, tsk could you imagine.” He glided his hand along your exposed thigh “that tickles.” Whispering into him you feel you face warm up. He hums in response, “want me to stop?” “No, I’ve missed you, I’ve missed all of you!” You turned catching all of their gazes, “same to you princess.” Jin chuckled, giving you a cheek kiss.

“Please let her-r go ba-ck now.” Their smiles faded, and you’d hate to admit it but yours as well. You’d usually never go against your mother but she just didn’t want to see you happy, ever. And you hated it. “Momma...I don’t wanna go back right now, can I be with my friends?” Her eyes stretched in shock and anger, the boys found your rebellion comedic letting a chuckle escape. “Y/n get back to your room now you have no clue what you’re playing with!” Her tone made you wince, no longer feeling bold you were about to comply. Taehyung griped your waist holding you back on top of him.

“And who are you to order someone around when you can’t follow orders yourself?” She sat speechless, “Taehyung, Namjoon, Jin...next month.” Her pleads were pathetic, even you knew it wouldn’t work this time. “No. Pay up today, or we’ll be taking some sweet sweet collateral.”At the moment you didn’t fully understand or care what exactly Taehyung was threatening, the only thing your brain could focus on being his rough palm griping and rubbing your inner thigh. The sensation caused a tingle within you, you couldn’t help but fidget in his lap. “Still tickling baby?” You nodded, a bit too flustered to speak.

“I-I I have a hundred or two I can give.” His hand ceased its motions, making you whine for more of the foreign feeling. He lifted a brow in suspect “You take us as a joke don’t you?” She shook her head frantically. “You just offered us not even a fraction of a year's worth of debt...you think we’re idiots, you think we won’t do what we say we will do you?” The tension made you uncomfortable as everyone glared at your mother for her response, you gripped Taehyung’s dark suit. “Hmph, okay Y/n, show us your pretty room Love.”

A simple request made your mother stand in protests, “going to get the rest of the money?” Yoongi asked knowingly, your mother trembled. Why was she so afraid, they only asked to see your room...maybe she was still upset over the wet spots. “No? Well I suggest you sit the fuck down.” Everyone left from their seat, “go on show us Petal.” He smiled in encouragement. You pulled Taehyung by his hand showing all of them into your seemingly empty room, nothing to embellish the space besides your curtains, calendar and bed.

“Very cute, very cute, right boys?” They hummed nodding while looking at the four bland walls around them. “Jungkook won’t you close the door please.” He demands the youngest, and he does as told, letting your catch a two second glance if your sniveling mother before your fate was sealed. “Lock it will you?” “Uhm it doesn’t lock.” You confessed plopping down on your plush mattress kicking your feet over the edge. “Ahh, Jungkook...make it lock.” He went to work and you watched curiously until your attention was taken by Taehyung climbing in bed next to you. “Very comfy.” He complemented.

“Oh, oh please take your shoes off.” You recited rules that were practically engraved in your memory. He laughed complying, “you heard her, shoes off.” They did as told, making your laugh at their unison actions. You turned to him with a smile still on your face, “want to see my closet?” “No, but I do want you to lay down.” You gave him an inquisitive look, you weren’t sick and you definitely weren’t tired. “It’s ok, I just wanted to play a game, a friends game.”

Oh how excited you were! A game with your friends! You laid down beside him your head rested on your pillow. “Ready?” You nodded eagerly, the rest of them watched closely. “Ok beautiful, I’m going to ask you some things and all you have to do is tell me if you’ve done it before...” he looked around at his men, they looked back with anticipation. “We’ll all play.” You nodded, beyond excited for this new experience.

“We’ll start easy, have you ever kissed someone?” Your face grew a dopey grin, “don’t be shy.” You nodded quickly, “oh? Show me how.” Sitting up a bit, you took his jaw, turning him to the side pecking his warmed cheek quickly. He smiled widely, “innocent little thing, here let’s try this.” He took your jaw in his fingers, coming in and ravishing your lips. Unknowingly you lay motionless as he took over the kiss, maneuvering you as he pleased. Pulling your slack chin he parted your lips, his tongue intruded sharing his taste. A tingle ran through you, you’ve never seen something like this let alone feel it. Taehyung pulled back trailing slobber as he lifted, “m-more more kissing!” He shook his head, laughing at your greed. “No no, there’s more to the game.”

Smirking he snuck his hand under your quaint dress, “ever let Somebody like me see your cute little panties?” You shook your head no, “let us see?” You eagerly pulled your dress up, “pretty in pink...wet your panties hmm?” Sheepishly you shut your legs, “sorry.” He rubbed your exposed tummy, “no don’t be sorry kitten, that’s great, so good.” He dragged his fingers along your pelvic area. “Yoongi, your turn?” Taehyung continued to brush your skin.

Yoongi stood from his seat on the floor in speciation. He brought his finger between your legs using his other hand to push your legs apart. “Ever felt something like this?” He ran his fingers up and down your middle, pausing along the top giving you an oddly familiar feeling that you loved. “Mm.” You moved a bit closer to the pleasure. “Yoongi stop, answer him y/n.” Nodding you yearned for yoongi’s fingers. “Don’t lie...show us.”

Rolling over you pulled a pillow from behind you positioning it between your legs as you lay on your side. “Go on.” Yoongi nudged you and you began to rub yourself, pushing the pillow firmer into your core whimpering as the pressure increased, “it feels so good!” “Naughty naughty y/n.” You continued to pleasure yourself, “mm I know, please don’t tell anybody.” Taehyung took the pillow rubbing his finger along the wet spot you left behind. “You ever cum sweetheart?” You squeeze your legs together hoping for pleasureful friction. “What’s that?”

“You’ve been rubbing yourself raw with no release?” He had a glint of pitty in his tone. “ I-I guess.” Yoongi had began his adventurous handy work once again and you couldn’t get enough. He sat beside you, looking into your eyes intently. “How’s it feel?” “Good, please don’t stop!” Taehyung pulled his partners hand away, “don’t give her too much Hyung.”

You pout squirming, itching with pent up sexual frustrations. “You both play like she’s a doll, she’s a woman, you know what she wants even if she doesn’t.” Jin came from his spot leaned against the corner, he came close stalking over your figure, “take these off.” He pulled your panties roughly you could hear the weak fabric give way as he stripped you.

“Careful.” You felt self conscious as they eyed your nude private area, Jin took over where Yoongi was removed, the direct contact could make you scream in joy, “close your eyes.” Jin ordered, and who are you to say no to the pleasure. A strange warmth took over your core making your hips jump uncontrollably “mhhm please.” “Hold her down Hoseok.” Even that simple second of neglect made you upset. Your hips were restrained and Jin continued his work, “sorry.” You opened your eyes to meet Taehyung’s gaze and a smile was plastered on his features, looking down at Jin who  was kissing your privates, so strange but so amazing.

“Oh please!” You couldn’t control your moans, closing your eyes, “too good princess?” “Mm too good.” Jin removed his lips from you “you're a savage Kim.” Jungkook comments eyes glued to your core, as if he couldn’t resist the view. “Some hair shows she is healthy n’ pure , but you wouldn’t know anything about that, you like your women whorish” He comments lewdly wiping his plump lips. They stood in speculation as you pressed your thighs together desperately. “Oh please! Jin please more!” You earned a hand over your mouth. In attempts to shut your pathetic whines. “Please don’t hurt her!” Your mother beat the door with concern. “Does she sound hurt, don’t make us do something we don’t want to, now go away!” Taehyung growled, before leaving the bed, he undid his pants the respect in you made you look away. “Ever see this before?” He climbed over you, too cowardly to peak, you kept looking into his dark irises. “Your private?” He laughed in your face, “my cock?” He sat on your legs trapping you. He pulled your dress over your head, fully undressing you with ease.

Taken over my temptation, Jimin groped your clothed chest “don’t touch her.” His command was final, Taehyung had been taken by the monster of greed and lust. “Go on look y/n.” Your eyes slowly traveled down, he had himself in his clutches stroking squeezing at the tip collecting the strange ooze on the tips of his fingers. Reaching he glossed your lips with his juices, “never wear makeup, this is all you need pretty girl.” The smell was strong and musky, curious you took a taste, sweaty and sweet. “Greedy girl...you know where this belongs?” He tapped you with his erect cock.

“I don’t think so.” He nodded, reaching below himself without hesitation he penetrated you with his index. “Ouch Tae!” His eyes stretched in surprise, “that hurts? Oh what fun you’ll be.” His finger stretched you slightly as he explored, thrusting softly, curly at the knuckle. Pulling his finger back, and a thick stripe of cloudy grool connects the two of you. “Shit, would you look at that.” They came looking as you lay victim Yoongi had pulled himself from his pants stroking himself shamelessly. Hoseok unbuttoned his top, his fist buried in his pants, while Jimin palmed himself giving you a warm smile, while Jungkook sat timid away from the action and Jin’s face set stoney, seemingly uninterested. Namjoon being the false comfort he was, he stood close, his bulge in your face as he stroked your hair.

Out of breath, the best you could muster being, “I’m sorry if it’s gross.” Lustfully he used your nectar to stroke himself sensually making violent eye contact in the act.

“Stop apologizing, this is the best cunt I’ve ever seen.” Using his foreign vulgar vocabulary he moved back, using his hands to get a better view of your most personal area. “Oh honey, you’ve never had anything in this sweet pussy of yours huh?” You shook your head, “no never.” You whisper. “Let’s change that yeah? Will you be a big girl?” You nodded body full of utter curiosity, what was coming for you the last thing you could have fathomed.

“Mm, you’re the sweetest thing on Earth y/n” he gazed into you, looking your shivering body up and down as if you two were completely alone. He lowered himself distracting you with another one sided kiss, this time though you attempted to participate.

Little did you know his hidden agenda, he gripped his girthy member, massaging it along your slickening core in search of your small entrance. “Ah Ah Taehyungie!” You squealed against his lips. He’d barely pushed into you and the pain was prominent “shh shh wouldn’t want to make momma upset.” He paused and looked down at your slightly connecting bodies. “Hmm Let’s play another game.” He reached for the pillow you were pleasuring yourself on, he placed it over your face constricting your air in the process, muffling your pathetic whimpers and mewls.

In one violent action...“TEAHYUNG!” Your throat felt as if it would collapse,He forced himself into your constructing entrance ripping your walls you felt yourself struggle to become accustomed his size. His pace inhuman. You gasped for air,the pillow blocking any gasp you could get. “I can’t breathe! I can’t breathe Tae!” He kept his murderous stroke speed pulling the pillow from your face you heaved, sobbing, screaming begging for freedom. “Shut the fuck up!” It could’ve been the tears, or haze of pain, but this wasn’t your friend anymore.

Taehyung’s face as contorted in sick pleasure inconsiderate of your wellbeing he gripped your hips fucking into you aggression never seen before. “T-Tae please we’re friends don’t hurt me!” You cried out for his mercy. “Hold her fucking mouth Min.” He obliged, his hand slick from his own juices. He stood over you griping and jerking his member, keeping his eyes on yours. “Close your damn eyes, your crying is going to make me soft.” That only made you cry more, the treatment you were getting from Taehyung caused an ache you couldn’t help but sob from. “It i-it fucking hurts!” You let the filth spill from your mouth as you groaned with every thrust, your statement muffed by Yoongi’s palm.

“Close. Them. Now.” Stubbornly you kept staring, you won’t obey them, friends aren’t supposed to to hurt you, ever. “Ahh fuck.” Yoongi began to vandalize your face, removing his hand from your mouth pulling your hair to aim for your mouth. “Ah shit shit.” He continued to stroke grumbling heinous names under his breath. “My eyes please help me momma,it hurts momma!” He’d spurted right in your eye and he knew it. “I told you to close them idiotic bitch, you obey us you’ll be alright.” He took your discarded panties wiping your eye.

You didn’t listen to his angered grumblings...She didn’t respond, she left you to suffer, you were being naughty and she could hear and she left you to suffer. The pain in your eye became dull as you became numb to Taehyung’s assault. “She left you, that bitch left you in here to get fucked, and you’re going to take everything we give thanks to mommy dearest...no one is going to rescue you.” Yoongi growled I’m your ear, you turned from him. His seed still rests on your pained features.

Taehyung pushed his thumbs roughly into your abdomen making you cry out. “Your cunt is still so tight, mm fuck stop clenching like that- I’m gonna fucking- oh shit.” He sent his seed deep into you, the sensation was sickening you began to dry heave having nothing in you to throw up. “Throwing up sweetheart?” You ignored his false concern, he gripped your hair. “Think twice before you do, you’ll be cleaning it with that pretty mouth every drop.”

Your face drenched in tears, snot and slobber, and the seed of another, you lay in defeat. He pulled his member for your stinging and burning feeling settled between your legs. “Nice job, you’ve beat her bloody.” Jin grumbled coming near, your entrance oozed a mixture of his cum and blood from your lost innocents. His finger brushed against your puffy injured vulva, “please no no nooo!” You instinctively backed away from the contact.

“My turn princess.” Your eyes closed, you could tell it was Jimin planning his attack. “Please Jimin, you’re still my friend right?” You Sobbed to weakly to even look into his eyes, Jimin had to put an end to it or it wouldn’t end at all. “I treat all my girlfriends this way, hm don’t worry baby it won’t hurt-” you heard him wander closer, “just open up.” You refused, turning your head away from his voice, “Ah y/n don’t be that way.” He slightly scolded pulling you back his way by your jaw, “open your mouth y/n.” You opened your eyes, glaring at him, your right eye blurring and irritated. He rubbed his member along your pursed lips. “No?” He leaned over, his member in his over hand. “Open. The. Fuck! Up.” He slapped your pussy harshly with every word, already sore you cried out, begging for mercy.

He took the opportunity, plunging his cock down your throat, gagging you choked and cried. “Yah stupid Bitch watch your teeth!” He gripped the back of your head, another agonizing ordeal. Your throat was sore from the screaming and now your throat was being rubbed roughly by Jimin’s third leg. “I’m gonna c-cum, and you’re gonna swallow all of it and you’re gonna keep it down.”

You couldn’t protest, you got used just as before you closed your eyes and prayed for it to be over as quick as it started. Hoseok neared you like a predator, “careful she’s sore.” You opened your eyes quickly, he had his pants completely off, his member erect his shirt open his sculpted body on display. You sobbed around jimins member as he took his time fucking himself into you. “I’m not putting my prick I that mess.” He referred to your battered entrance, he placed his clock between your folds, rubbing himself their. Even the subtle pressure gave you discomfort, “hey! Watch those fucking teeth slut!” Jimin beat the back of your head, picking up his pace.

“She sounds so fucking nasty.” Namjoon pulled himself out of his trousers “choking and gagging, fucking whore I wouldn’t fuck you even if your mom offered all the money she owed.” Namjoon insulted, pulling closer, “what an asshole.” Jimin grunted in retaliation. “This is all you’ll get from me.” Namjoon leaned over you, assaulting you relieving himself on your quaking body. “You sick bastard!” They found Namjoon’s action sickly humorous. He moved to your face, you tried to stop breathing in fear of inhaling it. Warmly it dribbled over you. “I bet you fucking enjoyed it.”

Jimin pushed your damp head down on him as he exploded in your mouth, that scene being all he needed to find his high. His seed was salty and less sweet; he tasted repulsive. You gagged as he removed himself, you leaned over the bed in utter pain heaving. “AHT HEY!” Taehyung cupped your mouth, “swallow be a good girl.” He rolled you back, you tried but your body refused, you gagged against his musty palm. Jimin pinched your nose “take it, take it, take it!” Air became scarce, you gulped ingesting his warm seed, the taste blanketed your throat.

They let you breathe, Hoseok found his release on your tummy, scooping it with his agile fingers he force fed you. “Please...n-no...more.” “Shut up, your breath reeks.” Your stomach flipped, you were going to be sick soon. “Roll her over.” Jin instructed, and of course they followed you let them do as they please, not like you could stop them. “Your pussy is beautiful, but I love a nice ass.” He unbuckled his belt, letting his pants fall. Spitting vulgarly, stroking himself. “Bite the pillow.” He pulled you up by your waist. Using his thumb he rimmed you.

Getting positioned he spit on your hole. The room was quiet. “Bite it hard.” He pushed himself mercilessly barely breaking through, “tight little bitch.” Your screeching earsplitting You’d become unconscious soon the pain was excruciating, you knew you were bleeding. “Please! I’ll do anything!Please not this, no more of this!” Finally he bottomed you out, “this is what love feels like, hmph remember that.” Jin growled fucking into you barely able to keep a pace.

Your vision blurred, slurring was your only form of speaking back, covered in piss and cum, tears and snot. Drooling all over yourself like an imbecile, bleeding. They’ve used you out, good for nothing you fell into the void of unconsciousness, sweet relief.

A dull jabbing welcomed you back into the real world, no way was this some sort of  twisted dream the disgusting smell registered back into your senses. The smell was you. “Fucking hell Jungkook finish already.” You’d been sick all over the mattress in your sleep, your mouth stale and stiff.

“I’m so sorry y/n I’m so sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry!” Blinking you looked over your shoulder, tears streamed his rounded face. “Ugh so sorry.” He gagged looking at your abused figure covered in bodily grime. “P-please turn around so it can be over.” Pitying you he held his head down shamefully thrusting to unwanted orgasm. He too filled you warmly pulling out quickly, scurrying to the corner losing his breakfast. “H-hy-'' he retched again. “Let’s go please, let’s leave.” He begged holding his stomach, Jungkook is still your friend, right? You could see he didn’t want to hurt you...

They put their clothes back on lazily.

“Be a peach and tell your mother we’ll be back next month on the dot, hopefully you won’t have to cover her tab two visits in a row huh sweetheart?”

“I hate you, all of you.”

“Ah, but we love you, and we always will.”

(Not my photo)

(Please interact like•reblog•reply it helps sm!)

@minshookie

[dokifluffs]

Overfeeding and Aftercare | Tendo, Himekawa, Miya Twins

Pairings: Tendo X Reader (gender neutral), Himekawa X Reader (gender neutral), Osamu X Reader X Atsumu (not romantically though) ((gender neutral)) 

Genre: v a m p i r e, fluffffff, fantasyyyy

Author’s Note: asdkakahd fantasyyyyy i love fantasy so much so i hope yiu all enjoy!! Happy reading!! 

Warnings: blood, passing out from loss of blood

Overfeeding and Aftercare | Kenma, Bokuto, Kuroo 

Tendo: 

The night sky was clear with not even a cloud floating in the sky, the crisp air flowing through your slightly open window, keeping your room cool throughout the night

You could hear the outside world so clearly- the crickets in the grass, the owls hooting in their trees, occasional sounds from other students’ in their own dorms

Testing season had fallen over university and it was time for everyone to spend this next month studying their eyes out, including you

You had been stuck in your room all day, leaving your seat at your desk as sparingly as possible to use the bathroom and to eat

Your stomach grumbled for the nth time tonight just thinking about dinner with your friends that you had to miss, instead stuck with a few granola bars you had left instead

There was absolutely no time to waste and you were on a clear schedule you made for yourself to get the most out of studying yet it meant sleeping and even eating less

Your single dorm was empty, simple and plain to your liking though you wished there were more pops of color to make it actually feel more enjoyable as you stayed in here

A small pile of clothes was formed in the corner of the room right outside your closet doors, your bed unmade from this morning when you woke

Your lamp light flickered from the old bulb that was near the end of its usable life

“No, no, no, not now,” your voice frantic, eyes heavy and body begging for sleep and sustenance as the light finally went out, a large gust of wind blowing through your window, making the pages of your notebook and textbooks flip

The pale moonlight shined in onto your desk as it peeked from beyond the tall oak tree that sat right outside your window

You groaned, your voice bouncing off the painted over concrete blocks of your dorm walls that matched everyone else’s as you leaned back in your chair

It was a weird feeling- your head spinning slowly, the burning sensation in your eyes as they watered when you finally shut them, pressing the palm of your hand over your eyes and forehead to relieve all the pressures you had pent up

“You’re up quite late…” You jumped in your seat, heart skipping a beat at the sudden silky voice of Tendo in your ears

His crimson eyes glowed in the dark, his two red orbs looking directly into your tired ones as you sat up in your seat, spinning to face him

He wore an oversized uni shirt that flowed with the breeze in the room, his hair down and the ends of his red locks obscuring his vision ever so slightly

“Don’t tell me you want to become nocturnal, now~” he teased playfully as he reached down, his icy hands taking yours in his, amused hearing the way you swallowed when he touched you

He tilted his head into your hand, his skin pleasantly cold against your worn, hot one from all the writing you did to review your notes and course

“I’m just studying, Satori. Are you hungry, again?” You asked, rubbing your thumb over his cheekbone

“Always,” he mumbled into your skin as he narrowed looking down to you, bending himself down ever so slightly as your arm was stretched upward in his grasp

He lowered his head, never breaking his gaze with you as he brought his lips across your flawless skin, his mouth already salivating at the faint feeling and sound of your blood pumping through your ulnar artery in your wrist

He closed his eyes as he closed his lips around your wrist, his teeth sinking in, humming in delight at the sensation of your blood over his tongue

You let out a wince at the pinching feeling

He removed himself from your wrist, the dark liquid slowly dripping from his teeth marks as he licked his lips

“You haven’t been eating properly, Y/N,” his voice dropped as your name rolled off his tongue. “You taste different,” he said almost disappointedly yet sounded completely different

You couldn’t tell if it was the darkness in the room with the moon shining behind the leaves and branches of the tree but it seemed his eyes were glowing even brighter

“I need to make sure you take care of yourself or else my meals won’t be as enjoyable anymore~” he cooed as he licked up the blood gliding down your arm, the corners of his lips curling in enjoyment when he felt your arm tense up as his tongue dragged up your arm

You bit your lip feeling his teeth sink back into the bite he made, taking in your blood to fill his hunger

The pads of his fingers holding your hand squeezed as he held your hand, stretching it

Your breaths grew longer and deeper, your vision clouding as your eyelids grew heavier and heavier

You let out a big yawn, your body letting go

Tendo caught you in his arms as you almost collapsed to the ground from your seat, never letting your body even touch the cold tiled floor

He lapped his tongue over his bite before he let go of your wrist once again, bringing you to your bed before laying you down, joining beside you

He licked your wrist until it stopped bleeding as you caught up on some much needed rest

“You should’ve taken care of yourself more,” he playfully poked your forehead, brushing your hair with his fingers, your body naturally curling and moving impossibly closer to his to reach the cool feel of his body in your sleep

Your nose was filled with the scent of tendo, his hand holding yours as you peeked open your tired eyes, tilting your head up on your pillow to meet his red eyes

“Good morning~” he chimed happily after being awake all night since he never needed sleep ever since he became immortal. “You really needed that,” he brushed his index finger down the bridge of your nose, smiling at the way your cheek was squished into your pillow

“Today, you’re taking a break and I’m going to make sure you eat and stay hydrated properly,” he leaned forward and kissed your forehead before you let out a small “mm” before closing your eyes again, bringing your forehead to his chest, his hand resting on your back draped over your side, legs intertwined on your bed

He hummed content holding you close, imprinting the feel and shape of your body close with his, relishing in your warmth, one he hadn’t felt in a while

It was a feeling he was determined to get used to for the rest of his immortal life

Himekawa: 

“Aoi, I’m here,” you shed off your raincoat and slipped out of your partially rained on shoes, calling into the darkened house, the curtains closed tightly to not let a single ounce of light in from anywhere. “Aoi?” You called into what seemed like an empty house

No movement or signs of anything or anyone

You walked carefully through the eerily dark house as rain showered over the house and entire neighborhood

“Aoi?” You knocked in his bedroom door standing ajar, creaking open with a haunting whine that made goosebumps rise over your arms

You shuffled in seeing the dark lump of his covers bundled up shift at the sound of your voice

“What’re you doing in there?” You peeked through a small opening that showed his face buried in the plush covers. “It’s time to feed, Aoi, it’s been too long.”

You tried to remove the blanket from him but was unable to budge

Ever since he changed, feeding became the thing he absolutely hated the most yet it was the one thing he needed to do

His eyes glowed bright red in the dark, no light natural or artificial could hold a candle to his eyes when they shined

He shook his head, one of the things he always did before he had to give in to feeding

He spent weeks after weeks, starving himself if it meant he didn’t have to feed on anyone or anything, most importantly, you but this also meant him gradually losing his strength

There were too many times in his early years where the hunger took over his humanity although no longer being one but what little he had left, even if he had to act like it, he wanted to keep it

This was a life he never asked for but he didn’t want a wooden stake through his heart or for his body to petrify- he didn’t want the bloodlust to consume him from the inside out again

“I know you don’t like this but you’re starving,” your voice was the calm in his storm that never went away as you brushed your fingers through his soft locks as they slid in between. “Please? I promise you won’t hurt me, you know I won’t let you.”

You could hear his quivering voice when he told you about his nightmares, seeing them so vividly at night, he could taste all the blood of those he had unintentionally drained, the horrors of what he was capable of, what he did to so many innocent people and the ones he loved most in the world

All he had left was you and he never wanted to lose you

He hesitantly sat up, the blankets falling off os his back and pooling all around his body, his fists clenched over his thighs, gaze avoiding yours

You pricked your index finger with a safety pin, bringing it to his lips

He gently took your hand in his, barely holding yours, his skin icy to the touch, it felt like as if he was standing outside during winter with nothing to keep him warm

He could feel his fangs protruding when his tongue made contact with the bead of your blood that formed on your fingertip and sucked

It was like an instant feeling when one drank water after being dehydrated for a day, however, in this case, it was hunger and thirst combined for weeks for Himekawa

Nothing had ever tasted so good in his lifetime

A shiver ran down your spine feeling his sharp teeth graze down the side of your finger, his lips ghosting over your palm before they found the soft spot in your palm, his teeth biting in and sinking into what felt like your radial artery

You winced at the pain but clamped your mouth shut, not wanting Aoi to stop because he surely would

It took a lot to get him to feed and almost nothing to get him to stop

He let the taste overcome him, all the fears he had was slowly dissipating as the black hole of hunger was taking over his mind

You blinked away, taking deep breaths as you kept yourself sitting upright, ignoring the sudden feeling of your body temperature dropping, the sudden rapid beating of your heart in your chest

You could feel your head drooping, swaying side to side as your vision blurred, the room beginning to spinning all around you

You bit into your knuckle, squeezing your eyes shut as you struggled to keep yourself conscious

He could feel all the energy and his strength returning with every ounce he consumed but fear pierced through his chest sharper than any stake when your body collapsed to the ground

His body froze seeing your unconscious body on the ground

You could hear soft whimpers in your ear, slowly becoming clearer and clearer as you slowly regained consciousness

“Y/N,” Aoi choked on his breaths with his eyes swelled and red from all the tears he cried and continued to drip off his chin. “I’m so sorry,” he sobbed, apologizing profusely as you woke, his hand automatically reaching for yours but instantly pulling back feeling the bandage he wrapped your hand in

He felt so heart broken, he wanted to disappear from existence the moment he realized you collapsed

It made him sick to his stomach despite ever being unable to feel sick

“I’m a monster,” he sunk back on his knees

“No, no, Aoi, you’re not,” you sat up, the damp towel he laid on your head falling onto his bed you laid on. “You are no monster to anyone,” you cupped his face, playfully squishing his wet cheeks, using your sleeves to wipe him dry

“You’ve been alive for centuries and who you are now is not the same person as centuries ago.” You pulled him close, peppering kisses to his forehead

“But I almost killed you.” He wanted to so badly to rip himself out of your hold so you wouldn’t have to touch him, touch someone who was supposed to love you yet almost ended your life

“But you didn’t and I’m still here and I will be til the end,” you reassured and hugged him close, pulling him to stand and making room beside you in his bed, your turn to dissipate his fears while more content that he actually fed compared to the past times

The Twins: 

Ravens cawed at you, perched on the branches of the oak trees in front of the house of your best friends, Osamu and Atsumu

As soon as you knocked on their front door, it felt as if life had fast forwarded itself now that you were suddenly upstairs

This always happened whenever you came over- it was feeding time

Your eyes were always squeezed shut and it felt like the breath was taken out of your lungs whenever either of them brought you inside to wherever they planned to feed on you

“You can open your eyes,” Osamu’s voice calm and light in your ear as your feet made contact with the plush rug over the cold wooden floors

He took your hand in his, his touch icy to your warm, living skin, as he led you toward one of the lounging chairs by the fireplace as the wooden logs crackled in the flame

“About time, I’m starvin’” Atsumu pushes himself off the couch and snatching your grasp out of Osamu’s, bringing you to the couch

But Osamu didn’t let go. He was much more gentle with you than Atsumu, the more hangry of them two

Your back was pressed into Osamu’s chest with your legs stretched out, Atsumu already advancing between your legs, preferring to feed from your thighs and Osamu your neck

You had been their feeder for what felt like sll your life at this point, but it always made you squeamish

“Stop squirmin’,” Atsumu grumbled hungrily as he firmly held down your legs as he spread them, his breath tickling you before he found his spot and sunk his teeth in

You let out a small yelp, adjusting to the feeling

Osamu’s body was cool to the feel even through yours and his clothes

Unlike his brother, he was a lot gentler with you

Looping his arm from behind around your head, he gently tilted it to the side with the guidance of his fingers loosely holding your jaw

“I won’t make it hurt as bad,” he whispered into your ear, making your heart race, you wondered if he could feel or even hear it

He ghosted his lips along your shoulder and neck until he found his spot, slowly bringing his teeth to your skin and pierced through your skin like needles

Atsumu repositioned his fangs, holding your leg up, digging his fingers into your thighs that would be sure to leave bruises, biting deeper into your flesh to taste as much as he could

Osamu held one of your hands from behind, the other moving from your jaw to your eyes, tilting your head back

It felt as if Osamu’s grasp on your hand was tightening as a wave of fatigue washed through your body

The crackling sound of the fire began to echo and drift around your darkened vision from Osamu’s hand covering your eyes, your heart beat gradually slowing down until your consciousness slipped away

Osamu’s eyes opened as he removed himself from your neck, his hunger satiated, his bite clean and pressed a gauze from his pocket to your neck when he felt your body go limp in his hold

“Atsumu, stop.” He kicked his brother off of your thigh, only for the blonde one to latch back on, biting into your other thigh with ease

“I said. Stop.” Osamu pulled you closer as your crimson liquid came out of Atsumu’s messy, numerous bites

Atsumu’s hunger was insatiable after having to wait a week every single time you fed them and this time, he was worse than the last

He glared at his brother, eyes glowing bright red even with the fireplace illuminating the entire room as Osamu held you close, your body curled up in his lap as his own eyes glowing at his twin

Your mind slowly began to wake as your eyes fluttered open

You could hear your heart beating slowly in your ears as if you were asleep- yet you were awake

Your hands felt about as you laid still in a dim bedroom with the curtains closed and a small lamp on a desk in the corner of the room

“Finally awake,” Atsumu huffed

Sitting up, your arms trembled weakly holding your body up

You didn’t even notice the twin until he moved in his seat beside the bed, your nose filling with the scent of Osamu but also the scent of Atsumu

“You’ve been out for the last three hours,” he sounded almost annoyed as you leaned back and rested into the pillows, half your face pressed into the bed you assumed was Osamu’s based on the smell

“Take it easy,” he pulled the blanket a bit higher over your body with a sigh

You were dressed in a big, dark red long sleeve you assumed was Atsumu’s

“Out.” You could hear Osamu’s voice as the door opened with a thud as it hit the wall. Atsumu grumbled beneath his breath as he got up from his seat, closing the door firmly behind him

Osamu came into vision as he brought the tray with something hot sitting upon it, steam rising from it but whatever it was, it smelled delicious

He peeked his head to you as he sat in the seat Atsumu sat in moments ago, pulling the seat closer

“I’m sorry for my brother... you know how ‘tsumtsum gets when he’s hungry,” he sighed. “How do you feel?” He asked, moving the blanket down from your face ever so slightly to see more of you

“Tired like I could sleep... forever,” you yawned, the tear rolling from your eye, over the bridge of your nose to the pillows

“You need to eat, I made some soup.” Osamu helped sit you up, careful with his strength before he poured you a bowl of soup, insisting on spoor feeding you when he felt how weak you really were

The hot liquid went down your throat, the savory taste lingering on your tastebuds and fed a hunger in your stomach you weren’t even aware of until now

For the rest of the night, Osamu and Atsumu took turns looking over you, mostly Osamu, though so he could change your gauzes, making sure their bites weren’t causing injections

Though it never really seemed like it, Atsumu was grateful having you in his and his brother’s life, feeding them, continuing to come back even after all the times he over fed from you

He peeked beneath the gauze to make sure he didn’t actually hurt you as you slept, bidding the two of them farewell till next week

~~~~~ Thanks for reading! Masterlist for more! Please do not repost anywhere else!

Tags (let me know if you wanna be tagged for all my haikyuu posts): @yams046  @mazey-chan  @sunboikyo00  @kara-grayson04​  @fortheloveofbakugo​ @tsumtsumsemi​ @osamuonigiri @1-800-wholesome @yamagucci​ @realityisoftendisapointing@plantisnotplant @k-eijiakaashi​ @pink-panda-pancakes​ @differentballooncollection​ @osamusamusamu@therainroguefanfiction​ @euphorihan@turquoiselace​ @macaronnv  @oxmaddy​​ @mrkoala4prsdnt​​ @curiouslilbeast​ @plantisnotplant@therestless101​ @abcdaichi​ @oyasenpai​ @kaaidalupita​ @lovinnoya​

[hansolmates]

vernon; blossomed (m)

feat. tattoo artist!vern x flower shop fem!reader based on nonnie’s big brain

genre/warnings: flangst, lang, wild generalizations of how tattooing works, gratuitous love for side characters, mild drinking, phineas and ferb references, mild foreplay

word count: 12k

Vernon called you his Rose. 

Not exactly his Rose, because you were definitely not anyone’s property and he wanted to give you nothing but your full autonomy, but it’s because he’s never had the chance to ask for your real name. 

But when he first spotted you in the little lavender and honey colored flower shop across the street, you were tending to the rose bushes at the front entrance. You were cutting roses and you didn’t look utterly graceful, in fact you stabbed yourself more than once with the thorns. He couldn’t help but laugh when you laughed when your co-worker had to hand you a new bandage every minute. 

He decided then that he liked you, even if it’s not wholly sexual or romantic, he liked you. 

Or maybe he just liked the idea of you, the way you’d lounge around in the canopy swing with your boots tucked under the seat, fluffy yellow socks wiggling out in the sun. Sometimes you’d read a book, sometimes for well over an hour. He liked how you soaked up the heat and created your own little world, happily unproductive. 

It was only a seven meter walk from the flower shop to the tattoo parlor, but the view from his front window required zero walking distance and a sure-fire lack of ever bumping into you. 

“Vernie’s got a crush on the Flower Girl,” Yoongi sing-songed, chugging along a box full of random-ass materials that Vernon was supposed to clean in the morning. 

Vernon scowled, and swatted away the older one’s hand when it dived in front of his face. 

Yoongi whistled like he was an old-time animation, singing the day away. “Vernie’s stalking his crush.” 

“I’m not stalking,” Vernon snapped, swiveling around in his rolling chair. “that involves shit like literally following her around,  photography, I dunno, being a weirdo?” 

“You definitely qualify for one of those.” Yoongi replied tartly, and he fought the urge to grin when Vernon finally turned back to the window, only to narrowly miss your form. The swing was now unoccupied, the only thing remnant were your working boots lined up against the entrance. “It’s been what, two weeks? Just ask her out already.” 

“You think I would’ve done that by now if there wasn’t a reason why?“ 

Soooo you were dating someone. Some super tall, super handsome guy would stroll up to the flower shop every morning, coffee in hand. Before you’d take your proffered coffee, he’d pucker his lips for a good-morning kiss in repayment. Vernon looked back to Yoongi, who was staring right back at him and confirming his suspicions that yes he was being a fucking weirdo for paying attention to things like that. 

Yoongi pressed his lips together, puffing his cheeks out in slight irritation. “So you’re stalking a taken girl,” he whistled lowly, “should I regret hiring you?” 

“Not funny.” 

“As repayment for effectively creeping me out,” The older one slipped his hand into his electric yellow windbreaker to twirl Vernon a ring of keys. “You’re closin’ up for tonight.” 

The brunette’s jaw dropped to his lap, and he got up from his spot by the window. “What? What happened to Minghao?” 

“Sick,” Yoongi shrugged. 

Closing up meant that Vernon had to stay until 12AM, at the very least. The area was off a college town and that meant a lot of young lucrative artists would stop by pretty late, hence the closing time. Usually Yoongi and Minghao were the night owls, but tonight Minghao was supposed to fly solo because Yoongi landed a last-minute recording gig. “C’mon, can I at least close early?” Vernon whined, “it’s summer. No one’s here.” 

“What, ya gotta date or something?” Yoongi smirked, swinging the entrance open. Halfway out the door, he added loftily, “don’t forget to water Patricia. It’s been two weeks.” 

The door slammed and Vernon was left alone. He spared a glance at the window, only to see that your boots were now gone from the patio and only one light was on in the shop. Vernon turned to his company for the night, their jade succulent, aptly named Patricia Planty. 

With Patricia Planty watered and a stomach full of Wendy’s nuggets in his body, Vernon busied himself up for a grueling five hours. Thankfully he brought in his laptop, as if he were expecting Yoongi to pull a fast one on him tonight. He drew some random things on his tablet: rockets, stars, the occasional squirrel, and roses. When he was tired of drawing, he’d blast the speakers off the joint and mess around with some of his music programming. When he was tired of doing both, he’d vegetate on the couch and read Reddit articles. 

It was past eleven when the first customer of the night stumbled in. Vernon fought the urge to groan, putting down the pen of his tablet on a particularly intricate constellation. 

“We’re closed!” He yelled through the office door. A white lie, but who would know? 

“Google said you were open until 12!” A voice yelled back, sounding slightly strained. 

Crap. Vernon lowered the volume and pushed away the swivel chair, swinging the office door open. With a rough clear of his throat and hoping not to look like too much of a jerk, he faced his customer, “Welcome to Nu ABO—” 

It was you. Cheeks ruddied, and your eyes glassed with a fresh glaze of tears. Your lower lip worried into a wobbly frown. Vernon’s Reebok’s glued to the concrete of the parlor, effectively stopping him in his tracks. The smell of mulch and a mixture of flowers penetrated his nostrils, but it did nothing to distract the utter hurt etched on your face. 

“Um, hey,”  his voice was gentle, yet unsure. “What are you doing here?” 

You just looked at him, incredulous. Vernon could have sworn he saw your left eyebrow twitch. Of course, you’ve never met him in your entire life, yet Vernon felt like he knew you since the beginning of your summer work. “Gettin’ a tattoo.” You replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, rubbing away a stray tear. 

He didn’t want to say it, but Vernon sighed and reasoned, “But it’s just that, ya kinda look—” 

You brushed past him, going straight into the artist room and plopping on the worn leather chair meant for customers. It was still high up because Vernon was cleaning the underside of the metal, so you had to do a little hop to get on. “I don’t care what kind of design. I looked up your Yelp online and everything looked pretty good.” And you then proceeded to unbutton the top of your blouse. 

“Holy shit,” he bounded over to you, grappling his fingers between your shirt before you could undo the rest of it. His breath was probably hot and heavy, compared to yours which was fresh from the cool summer air. Your faces were so close, closer than he ever fathomed. He didn’t think you two would meet this early in the year, as he was emotionally preparing to visit your flower shop at the end of the month, making up some spiel on how he needed to purchase real roses to replicate a commission. Not now. Now was a spontaneous episode, where he was trying to refasten your shirt and ignore the petal pink lace of your bra baiting his eyes. 

When he sensed that you would in fact, stop taking your shirt off, he backed up. “It’s just that, after eleven we don’t really apply tattoos. We just take consultations.” He tried to sound defeated, rubbing the back of his neck. Again, another lie. But Vernon wasn’t about to ink you on the spot, especially when you looked like this. 

“Is it because I’m upset?” You cried, “because I assure you, I’m in the right mind!” 

He winced, lolling his head back and forth. “That’s debatable.” 

You frowned, “C’mon, I have money. Just do me this one solid.” 

“What? No, you don’t even know what you want!” Vernon was exasperated. Not that he imagined the first time meeting you would be a walk in the park, but at the same time he wasn’t expecting to argue with you. 

"Don’t you want to be part of my spontaneous young life? Give me a tattoo that I’ll think about with my children 30 years from now?” He would laugh if you didn’t look like you were crying a river ten minutes ago. “As long as it’s not a tramp stamp, because I don’t think I can pull that off—" 

"Did you break up with your boyfriend or something?” Vernon blurted out before he could regret it. 

Your face morphed into something Vernon couldn’t understand. Pain, for sure. But a sort of relief knowing that you didn’t have to hide it. “Damn,” you give him a tired smile, “does the whole town know or something?" 

You cried again. This time, Vernon reacted quicker. Pulling out a Wendy’s napkin from his flannel pocket, he proffered it to you. He was thankful you didn’t question whether it was clean or not (it was!) and you proceeded to cover your snot and tears all over it. 

"Do you wanna talk about it?" 

You sniffled and blew a particularly large chunk of snot before you shook your head. 

"Do you… want fries?” He gestured to the small table in the room, which had some leftover fries from his combo. “I can heat ‘em up in the microwave." 

Due to the fact that you ran out of tissue room, you rubbed your face with the entirety of your sleeve. You peeked out mid-rub, and replied with a soft, "hell yeah I do." 

His heart twitched. Even betwixt your teary expression, you were so freakin’ cute. He shuffled back to the office, nuking the leftovers in the microwave until they were piping hot. Vernon waited a bit for them to get cool, and fiddled with the music so a soft R&B playlist bounced off the walls. He couldn’t believe you were here. Scratch that, he could, because you were bound to run into him one day due to pure proximity. 

But he didn’t imagine you’d be plopped in his artist room at 11:32, bleary eyed and shoving potatoes in your mouth. 

Vernon busied himself with his phone, and typed a hasty you wouldn’t believe what just happened… to the employee group chat. 

[June 11, 11:33PM]

Bo$$ man: dont tell me u put aluminum in the microwave AGAIN

Hao hao: the chinese mafia came for me, didnt they? good thing I called out 

Jeonghan is a prick: use your resources! sharp items are everywhere :) emergency money is under Patricia’s table

Bernie: tf is wrong w all of you 

Bernie: SHES HEREEEEEE

"M'sorry,” you mumbled with a mouthful of fries, breaking Vernon from his mid-text crisis. He felt his phone buzzing like hell as he shoved it in his pocket, but ignored it for the sake of you. Your previous high of emotions has long worn off, and now you were looking a little embarrassed as you fixed your gaze on the empty container of fries. Your face is blotchy and red, and you’re especially puffy due to the salt you just consumed. “I should go home." 

He didn’t want to be intrusive, but the look on your face showed it was clear that you didn’t want to go home just yet. Drumming his fingers against the metal table, he casually suggested, "Why don’t I do your back?" 

You looked at him like he was crazy. "You still wanna tattoo me? After I cried like an idiot and ate your fries?" 

"You’re not an idiot for being upset. And I offered you my fries.” He pulled out an ink canister, and a thin needle. “This is temporary ink we use to practice, or for customers who wanna test out the look. Lasts one to two weeks. And y'know, it’s a nice distraction." 

You looked skeptical, unsure of his kindness. "Why my back?" 

He shrugged, "It’s the biggest canvas. And if you don’t like it, you don’t have to look at it." 

Still, you’re not convinced. There was something strange about him, something almost too sweet. While your schema may be marred by television and movies, the man in front of you didn’t seem like he quite fit into this little shack. He’s full of color, in his eyes and in his stature, his words clean and pure as he tries to soothe your aching heart. And as much as you tried not to check him out, you spotted no tattoos on any viewable part of his body. 

"And it’s kind of cathartic, really.” He watched your lips quirk up in a smile at the word usage. Not only sweet, but probably smart. Your first smile all night. Cheeks effortlessly heated, he continued, “you kinda just let go into the feeling. And it’s always fun to not know what’s been drawn until the very end." 

You’re curious. There’s excitement in your vision as he gestured to the available cot, inviting you. "Alright. Ink me up." 

Vernon grinned, and started preparing the workspace. Handing you a medical gown, he quickly shuffled away to prepare the ink and needles. He didn’t really work with the clients as deeply as this, he was really just a glorified secretary that took care of the consultation. While he washed his hands, he heard the faint rustle of fabric, definitely your shirt and bra. He turned up the temperature of the water, acutely aware of how hot his hands were getting. 

"Um,” your voice is muffled from being pressed up against the cot, your face presumably propped with pillows. “So are you Yoongi?" 

"Nah, I’m Vernon.” He wheeled over a cart full of supplies, the metal clanging against the concrete. “’M usually the guy who wipes the sweat off his brow." 

You hummed your own name in response, resting your cheek in the plushness of the cotton pillow. There’s a number of sounds paired with the R&B in the background. The smack of Vernon putting on gloves, the click of the needles and the slickness of the balm Vernon has applied on your back. His touch was warm, as his palm crescents across your back to soothe the balm into your skin. He then wiped it down with a paper towel until your skin was smooth and dry. 

"Any ideas yet?” He asked, and from the corner of your eye you see him switch out a needle for a new ink pen. 

“Maybe, stars?” Your voice is muffled against the cushions, as you’re hugging them close to your body. “And maybe something inspired by Spiderman? I liked that new one with Miles, he’s a cool one." 

You could hear the smile in his voice, "I liked that one, too." 

You stuff your own smile in your pillow, how embarrassing could it be that this stranger can make you feel better so fast? Mingyu would be groveling if he saw you now, topless, letting a man ink you up in however way he wished. "Will it hurt?" 

He chuckled at that, "Nah. The ink will sit on top and sink in, I barely have to apply any pressure. Just relax." 

Under the discretion of Vernon, who offered you fries and liked Spiderman, you relaxed. The first stroke of the needle and you were a goner. You closed your eyes and let him do his thing, You couldn’t tell what exactly was going on through his mind as he was painting your back, but you could tell his art was rather cacophonous: stiff pokes here and there, smooth strokes, and wide breaths of ink staining your back. The ink melted into your skin, bonding to your cells under Vernon’s careful control. 

It was almost 1AM when he finished. He tapped your back, urging you up. Tired, and slightly dazed, you sat up. You realized a little too late that you’re only wearing a thin hospital gown, the straps having fallen midway through the process. The air was cool against your skin. 

Vernon totally would’ve gotten a complete view of your sideboob if he wasn’t blushing like a maniac and looking away, and you respected that. His arm is punched out, fisting your button down. You hastily snatched it away, and turned around in order to look decent. 

“The ink won’t show up fully for another six hours, so until then let me know how you like it.” 

“Thank you so much,” you smiled gratefully as you do the last button of your blouse, and pulled out your phone. “Do you accept Venmo or Cashapp?” 

“Oh, yeah.” He accepted the proffered device, and put in the necessary charges. 

Once he gave back your phone, you added a sizable tip to the price he typed up. “The time really flew by,” you noted the time on the corner of your phone, 1:07. “It was really, an experience like you said.” 

He shrugged, and threw you an easy smile. “I try.” 

"Can I get a real tattoo from you someday? Y'know, when I’m ready?" 

"Ah, no. I’m not really under the apprenticeship.” He looked bashful when he said it, as if he were caught doing something wrong. “I just work here for the part time money. I do art on the side, though.” 

You had the urge to ask what he doesn’t do on the side, but it was late and you were probably holding up the poor guy for your trivial questions. “Regardless, I’m still thankful it was you that did this for me.” 

In three strides, he opened the small door for you. “My pleasure. Have a good night. Or, morning. Or if you’re one of those people who don’t consider it morning unless it’s light out, then good night?” 

“Good night,” you giggled, “get home safely.” 

“You too.” 

The screen door slammed shut behind you, along with the main door. Your car is parked in the grass patching of the flower shop. You jogged over, and the summer air made you shiver, your back still raw and warm under Vernon’s touch. 

You couldn’t wait until the flower shop closed. 

If Wonwoo noticed that you moved the porch swing relative to the placement of Nu ABO, he hasn’t brought it up. You weren’t spying on Vernon, no. But your skin was starting to itch with curiosity and in your haste to leave last night, you didn’t even ask what he designed on your back. 

“Are you stalking the tattoo guy?” 

Despite the voice being petal soft, you flinched. Assistant Manager Joshua Hong with a bouquet of boat lilies, was accusing you of stalking. His Converse tapped rhythmically against the wood paneling, looking down at you like a guilty child.  

“What?” you floundered, waving around the florist magazine in your hands. “Josh, I’m studying! And the sun was in my face so I moved the swing.” 

“You’re studying,” Joshua flickered his eyes to the run down shack across the road. “The tattoo guy?” 

“I already said I wasn’t!” 

“Then you’re telling me you spent all last night doing that,” he reached over to tug at your starched work collar, “all by yourself?” 

Your hand flew to your neck, as if you were trying to hide Vernon’s hard work. “I just wanna see what he did, all right? And I’m trying to be very patient until closing because if Wonwoo sees me going there,” you jerked a head none-too-gracefully at the direction of the parlor, “he’s gonna tell you-know-who.” 

Joshua frowned, because he already knew. After all, he stayed in the back room with you all last night, wiping away your tears. “Well, whoever did it is truly an artist,” he said genuinely, “it’s beautiful.” 

Joshua finally left you alone, and you suddenly felt emptier than before. Sure, the breakup with Mingyu was conventionally bad, but why were you so conflicted with your feelings? You didn’t want Mingyu to know you were hanging out with other guys, but you wanted to let go of him. Maybe you were trying too hard too fast. 

But Vernon made everything so, so easy. 

No, you are not letting him be a rebound. The inner conflict in your head was giving you a massive headache, you couldn’t tell if the vibes you were feeling last night were because of the recent breakup or just an authentic spark. 

The storm door shuttered boldly, and you jumped. Wonwoo stepped out, and gave you a weird look. “You alright?” 

“Me? Yeah, fine.” You gripped the collar of your shirt and pretended to fasten the buttons. 

He was unconvinced, either that or the pinched look he was sporting was an indicator of a bad day. “Listen, I know things are gonna be weird because my best friend is your, y’know,” he trailed off, painfully trudging through this conversation as easily as trudging through quicksand. “He’s gonna stop by a couple more times during the week, doing me a few errands. So if you wanna take the week off, recalibrate before the the month ends, just let me know. ” 

“Won, please,” you wanted this to end, “we don’t have to talk about this, alright?” 

He awkwardly twirled around his car keys. “Alright.” As simple as that, he threw himself in his sedan and drove off, dirt brushing the pavement. 

You glared at the dust cloud until his car was far from your sights, the mustard color blinding your vision. “Honestly,” you said to yourself, finally hopping off your swing into the direction of the shack, “he thinks I’m five and never experienced heartbreak.” 

“Welcome to Nu ABO!” this voice was different, and you slowed your steps. It doesn’t quite have the husk that Vernon’s voice held, but definitely matched the energy. The boy stepped out, and his eyes sparkled in recognition. “Flower Girll,” he said to himself, and you suddenly felt like you got caught, “I don’t think we’ve met before.” 

"We haven’t,” you replied warily at the pet name, “where’s Vernon?" 

"Oh, he’s around.” The guy waved noncommittally to the air in the room, crouching his head to look down at you. He stuffed his hands in his black overalls, which covered a painfully bright rainbow tye-dye tee. “Curious to see Vern’s ink though. He’s only ever done small stuff.” 

“I thought he wasn’t an apprentice.” 

 He flicked his wrist around to show you a beautiful line of Chinese calligraphy. "Keep the secret between us, ‘kay?” He winked. 

“Minghao, leave her alone.” Vernon stepped out of the small bathroom hidden in the artist room, a white towel behind his neck. You took in his disheveled appearance. His face was red from washing his face, and he wore the same clothes from yesterday. “Hey.” He said. 

“Hi,” you replied, “did you sleep here last night?" 

"Uh, yeah.” Vernon rubbed at his neck again, and stuffed the towel in his backpack. “I usually do the morning and afternoon shifts, I covered for this guy last night,” he jabbed his fist in Minghao’s shoulder, “but still had to do my day shift.” 

“So,” Minghao rocked back and forth in his boots, “why are you here?” 

You suddenly felt self-conscious, and gripped your phone between your two palms. A little part of you was disappointed that Vernon was not alone, but another part of you was relieved. It helped slow down the pace of your feelings (feelings?) that was heading in a direction you were not anticipating. “I wanted to say thank you again for last night.” You coughed, and Minghao grinned wider at your explanation. “And I was wondering if you could take a picture of my back? I haven’t had a chance to look at it.” 

He beamed, and you could tell he was happy that you wanted to document his work. “Oh, of course! I completely forgot last night.” 

Vernon moved to grab your phone, but Minghao swiped a hand in front of him. “Can I take your photo?” He asked you, although the look in his eyes said that you didn’t have much of a choice. 

Your cheeks burned at the sudden intrusion. “Huh?” 

“I mean, have you seen this guy’s Insta?” Minghao scoffed, albeit playfully as Vernon mirrored your flush. 

“What are you talking about?” Vernon exclaimed, thoroughly insulted, “my profile is tastefully abstract.” 

“It looks like it was tastefully done by a three year old.” Minghao pulled out his iPhone, and adjusted the filters. “I’m doing you a favor here, Flower Girl.” 

You looked warily at Vernon, who slumped in defeat, “If you’re going for that e-girl vibe, I guess Hao’s a better photographer.” 

“Better than your pictures coming out blurry.” Minghao shot back, holding the camera to your face. “There’s no light in here,” Minghao glared at the singular window in their tiny studio, the sill decorated with a single jade succulent. “Got any ideas?" 

Vernon shrugged, "You said I have the taste of a three year old, so." 

With Wonwoo gone for the day, you realized that you did have an idea of where you could take a tasteful picture. The thrill excited and terrified you. You only wanted a simple picture to see what it looked like, but Minghao looked as equally as excited to see your ink. Maybe it was the fact that the art was fleeting or that Vernon was really that talented, but it encouraged you to offer the setting up.

"I think our greenhouse has plenty of light,” you gestured out the studio’s only window, which was in perfect view of the flower shop. “We should be closing up soon, so it’s free." 

Minghao nodded approvingly, "We can try." 

And with a hasty "be back @ 4:20!” sign taped on the front door to Nu ABO, the three of them walked across the street to the greenhouse. 

You went in first, nearly bumping into Joshua who was bent over, pot in hand. 

“Hey Josh,” you grabbed the keys from the front desk, “borrowing the greenhouse." 

"Hey Josh,” Minghao and Vernon mimicked, who found it amusing that you just brushed by without an introduction. 

You rolled your eyes, hearing them exchange pleasantries and bro fists. The plexiglass doors to the greenhouse unlocked with a turn of your key, the smell of heat and grassy rain hitting your nostrils. Joshua placed the pot somewhere, following suit as the boys were right behind you. 

“Awesome,” Minghao exhaled, stepping further into the greenhouse. It was a small one, but comfortable enough for a couple patrons to browse around. “I’m gonna move around some plants if that’s okay, I gotta vision.” 

Joshua looked a little frazzled watching Minghao talk to himself and start moving the settings around (“The hydrangeas don’t go there, are you crazy?”) and started helping Minghao move the pots and placements around. You and Vernon hung around the entrance, giggling to yourselves. 

You tried to bump his shoulder, which didn’t even reach his. “So, what’s your Insta handle?” 

He quirked his brows at that, “Why, so you can judge my aesthetic too?” 

“No,” you replied, faking your shock. “I would never insult your taste!” 

With a roll of his eyes he said, “Speaking of taste, since your shift is over and my shift is over,” Vernon rocked back and forth on his feet. “Wanna grab a bite?” 

Something’s fluttering in your stomach, and you stomp it down. It’s an innocent invite, yes. Unfortunately it was not-so-innocent in your twisted mind knowing that you are still fresh from a breakup, yet your backed is marked with Vernon’s work. “You must be tired though,” you tried to reason, “you should get some rest, I don’t wanna bother you.” 

“Not a bother,” he said immediately, “besides, I wanna ask you something.” 

That got you curious. Before you had a chance to ask, Minghao was ushering you over, telling you to stand in front of a bundle of orchids. They’ve bloomed a Canary yellow, encasing you in a golden ring of flowers overlooking the terrace. The new friend has gestured for you to undo your shirt and he turned away in respect. It’s different with an audience and an expectation.  You made haste to undo the buttons of your blouse, then your bra, throwing it aside. You felt the warm, moist air kiss your back, and you heard a low whistle coming from Minghao. 

“Beautiful,” Minghao exhaled, “Vern, you’ve outdone yourself." 

Beautiful. Vernon made you beautiful.

Your body was simmering, and you could do nothing as you let Minghao photograph you. You focused your eyes on a puddle dripping from a faucet in front of you, counting the seconds between each droplet. 

“And, done.” 

You shoved on your clothes, and felt extra awkward as you fumbled to reach for the straps of your bra. You nearly slipped on the puddle as you walked back to the boys, who were busy over Minghao’s shoulder. 

“Super awesome,” Minghao handed you the phone brightly, “so much texture and feeling.” 

The screen showed a halo of foliage that surrounded your bare back, blush orchids kissing the frame with color. Your work shirt bundled under your hips, and fell under your elbows to reveal a city sky. You were breathless, zooming in to capture every detail of the ink. A navy sky, blanketing buildings across your back in a diagonal, splaying from the bottom right to the top left. On the bottom, skyscrapers reaching for the stars. 

If you zoomed in enough, you could tell that the stars were shaped like roses. 

“I don’t know how many times I’ve said thank you in the past two days,” you started, causing Vernon to grin widely. “But thank you, I’ve never felt so beautiful.” 

Vernon scoffed, “I didn’t do anything, I’ve only enhanced your beauty. That’s our shtick.” 

You handed Minghao back your phone and thanked him. He then rushed off, saying he had to stay at the parlor since Yoongi was coming soon. Immediately, Joshua began putting back the plants in their rightful places. You and Vernon followed suit, starting with the smaller ones. 

“So,” Vernon picked up a tray of succulents, “are we still on for dinner?” 

Wide-eyed Joshua crept in-between the foliage, laughably appearing under a series of hanging plants like a madman. “Dinner?” he asked, looking between you two. 

“Yeah man,” Vernon reached to pull Joshua away from the plants, “wanna come?” 

Simultaneously disappointed and relieved, you let out a subconscious exhale. Joshua was coming, which meant that there would be no possibility for feeling weird (or catching feels), being awkward or fighting any oncoming feelings with Vernon. 

"On Thursdays there’s this really good half-off sushi deal by my place. We can take out and eat at my apartment?” Joshua’s kindness was palpable at the offering of his home, and the both of you smiled gratefully.

Not more than two hours later, the three of you are bundled away in Joshua’s two-room, empty boxes of carryout stacked high. The television was playing reruns of Full House, the only source of light in the dim space. 

“Are you gonna go home soon?” Vernon asked, and turned his head to the corner of the room. Joshua is cuddled up in the single couch, tucked in a wearable blanket with the armholes. 

You shrugged, “I dunno. Usually I crash here for sushi nights,” you patted the couch lovingly, “This is my second bed.” 

Vernon chuckled, tucking his feet under his thighs. It made him look impossibly small in comparison to how tall and lanky he actually was.

“So, what did you want to ask me?” 

Vernon looked between his legs, as if he were trying to piece his words together. “Long story short, I got waitlisted at my top graduate school option,” he then pulled up his phone, revealing the picture of your back that was taken that afternoon, “but I was thinking that if I made a portfolio of this kind of art, it would really tip my application over the edge. Originally I was thinking of just sending my usual art, but it just popped in my head today while we were doing it.” He looked up through his eyelashes, wisps of copper looking expectantly at you. “If you’re comfortable with it, would you be my canvas?”  

“Live art,” you surmised, “honestly, I’m honored that you would want me to be a part of something so big. You think I’m that good?” 

No, you weren’t doubting Vernon’s art one bit. The fact that your back would be out on display for a bunch of strangers was unnerving, to say the least. 

“Are you kidding?” Vernon zoomed out of the image, revealing the curve of your back and the generation of life reflected in the greenhouse. “This is wicked. You’re stunning. We’d make a great team!” 

You felt your body heat at the statement. His presence was almost too refreshing, and you wanted to return the favor of helping you out last night. 

“Lucky for you,” you shot a quick text to Wonwoo, “I’ve planned to take this week off.” 

Over the course of the week Vernon wanted to do an artistic timeline of sorts, adding and retouching the already existing ink on your back until the canvas was full. It felt fulfilling, letting yourself become a vessel of success for someone. The following day, Vernon shot you a text revealing his portfolio, and said how excited he was to see you. 

You met in the shack after his shift, and Vernon let you into the office and locked the door. You can hear the rap being played in the artist room where Minghao and Yoongi were working with a client.

The artist was muttering to himself as he invited you to sit at the couch. Something about whether he wanted to start from the “top-down” or “bottom-up.” Instead of contributing to his madness, you turned away from him and started shedding your shirt. Today was a plain cotton shirt, and you shucked it off and balled it in your arms. 

No less than five seconds was Vernon’s hands on your back, and despite the warmth radiating from his fingertips, you couldn’t help but shiver. Vernon had explained that while he did a large portion of your back the first time, there was still room for growth and he wanted your back filled by the end of the week. 

“Do you mind if I,” his hand hovered over your bra. 

You shook your head, and with his thumb and forefinger he flicked off both your bra straps with ease. Your hands flooded themselves in the fabric of your t-shirt, which silently accepted your death grip. 

“Sorry, do you feel weird?” He definitely sensed your lack of vocality, and put one strap back in case. 

“I’m fine,” your voice is light, what else could you say? 

“Whatever you say,” he hummed, and resumed his work. 

You opt to take in the sounds. Minghao laughed about something in the other room, coupled with the zing of the needle. The music pulled to a stop and boomeranged back into a smoother arrangement. 

“I think we’ll start from the bottom-up and build from there,” he then placed his hands around your waist, poking at the dive between your waist and your bottom. 

There’s an unmistakable heat that pooled within you, which caused you to wring your shirt harder. It was going to be a long week. 

By Wednesday, he was in your apartment, working on the sides of your waist. The day after every session, Vernon would take a picture of yesterday’s work and show it to you. A gummy grin would always take over his face, either proud of himself or happy that you loved the new addition. 

Despite the fact that the only thing covering your body was a thin gown medical taken from the shop, every pore of your body felt unbelievably hot. You really shouldn’t be mixing alcohol on a Wednesday night, but Vernon was excited that he was halfway done with the project and it was time to be “poppin’ bottles.” 

You felt a little drowsy as a result of that, but nothing terrible. Like he said, the feeling was cathartic. 

“Aren’t you drunk too?” you murmured into your navy blue whale plush, “what if you accidentally stab me?” 

Vernon laughed, and it shook the couch. You couldn’t see his face as he sat on the floor, getting in the crevices of your skin. He poked at your skin a little harder than usual, as if he were testing the possibility. “That’d still take a lot of strength.” 

“You’d be surprised,” you sighed, “those little sticks florists use to keep the babies upright? Flat as a thumb and I still manage to impale tomatoes with them.” He doesn’t respond to that, and you’re left drowning in your own answer. You wondered if he truly thought you were a crazy tomato-killer, or was concentrated on detailing a particular patch of skin. “Can I tell you a secret?” you blurted, “honestly, I think flowers are beautiful, but I really hate working at the florist. The only reason I’m doing it is because Joshua really needed the help and he knew I wasn’t going to do shit until my city job starts in September.” 

“Huh,” Vernon stopped, resting the heel of his hand on your back. “That’s funny. Explains all the cursing when you’re cutting roses outside.” 

“You’ve watched me outside?” you grinned into your cushion, “creepy much?” 

“Do you wanna know a secret?” Vernon blurted, evading your question with one of his own, “I’ve had the biggest crush on you since you came by in May.” 

You tensed, and if Vernon noticed, he didn’t react. He kept on doing his business, marking your back with baby’s breath. It had to be the alcohol talking. If he drank at all, you couldn’t even tell because you couldn’t get up and he was strikingly coherent. All this time, and you didn’t even notice? 

“You don’t have to answer,” he said, as if he knew you were strung speechless. “I just, wanted to say it. We’re cool.” 

And you agreed, pretending to fall asleep. 

Friday was around the corner before you knew it, and Vernon wanted to photograph the final piece where it all started. The greenhouse was devoid of human life at the crack of dawn, unless you counted Joshua who was asleep on the counter because he was the only one with a key that knew of your recent escapades with Vernon. 

Vernon was just as tired as you are, but he was adamant about having the photo taken at dawn, as the first picture was taken in the late day. There was some contrived symbolism attached to it that you didn’t really understand, but you trusted his vision. Besides, your panda eyes wouldn’t be revealed in the photo, so you could master the art of sleeping upright while he took photos. 

“Alright,” Vernon set up his camera. He was dressed in a university zip up and matching sweatpants, like he just rolled out of bed. “Everything’s set up, whenever you’re ready.” 

Likewise with you, and you pulled off your hoodie, not bothering with a bra. Despite the fact that the room was temperature controlled, the cold morning air still managed to worm its way to your bare top. You quickly rubbed down your gooseflesh with your palms.  

You two engaged in a comfortable silence as you tested out your poses and he adjusted his frame. After a couple of practice shots, the air seemed calmer.

“Cold?” Vernon asked casually.

“Anything that isn’t under the sheets of my bed is cold as hell,” you muttered, trailing your fingers delicately across your waist. 

“That’s a nice pose,” Vernon said to himself, “we’re almost done. Then you can go to bed for the rest of your day. Unless you’re down for breakfast?" 

You two still haven’t spoken about his little confession the other day, but in all honesty there was no reason to bring it up. Your lives were going in different directions, and you knew Vernon deserved more than a halfhearted summer fling. 

"I think I’m down for bed and breakfast,” you replied wryly. 

“Smart girl,” Vernon chuckled, “can you change your pose for me? Like, pretend that you’re stretching.” 

You didn’t understand what he meant by that, so you ended up flexing your arms in different directions. 

“No, we’re not doing yoga.” He let his camera swing around his neck as he rushed over to you. The sun was a soft white, the antithesis of golden hour as you two rushed to make the magic happen. He grabbed your arms from behind, twisting the left wris in an unusual angle. 

"Ah, Vernon!” You jerked around to face him, now fully awake. “I’m not a Barbie doll, you can’t just move me like that." 

Vernon doesn’t respond. He let go of you as soon as you screamed, eyes blown wide and pupils a thick black. His stare is frozen to yours, and his hand is in mid-air, a centimeter away from your bare breasts. 

"Oh,” you said, “did I whack you with my boob when I turned?" 

"Yeah, you boobed me.” Vernon looked afraid to stare anywhere but your face. “I’m so sorry." 

"It’s okay,” you bit the inside of your lip, “I don’t mind if you touch me there." 

Now, Vernon looked terrified. 

It’s been a long week. A long, surreal week. You wanted to tell Vernon about your conflicted feelings, you wanted to ask about his little crush, and what on earth did he find appealing about you. You wanted to tell him how much you trusted him with your body, and how you wanted him to do more to you than just ink. 

It’s then, the gaping boy shook himself together. His hands encircled your neck, haloing at the finishing piece of his work, an echelon moon. Vernon’s fingers trailed to cup your face, and you felt your whole body warm in anticipation. Patient, you waited for his carmine eyes to flutter shut, and you smiled, finally closing yours—

"The fuck is this?" 

In an instant, the air was sucked out of you like a blackhole, and Vernon immediately shielded you, throwing his jacket across you like a towel. 

"Mingyu,” you said shakily, clutching the cotton coat tighter around your form. 

It’s then that a no-longer bleary-eyed Joshua stumbled into the greenhouse, seconds too late. 

Mingyu threw down the sack of fertilizer he hauled on his back, black dirt smattering the floor.  “Its been barely a week and you’re fucking someone in the greenhouse, of all places?” Mingyu was angry, plain and simple. “I thought we agreed on a break." 

"You agreed on a break,” your thighs were numb from leaning on them, but Vernon’s hand on your back encouraged you to get on your feet. “I agreed that two years was too long to wait." 

"And who are you?” Mingyu squinted his eyes at Vernon.

“He’s none of your business,” you stepped in front of him, tugging his hoodie  closer around your frame. 

Mingyu’s face fell in realization, and he looked between you two with forlornness that made your stomach churn. “C’mon baby,” your nails embedded themselves in your palm at the jab, “can we go outside and talk about this?” 

“I’m not going anywhere with you,” your voice was paper thin, but loud enough for Mingyu to hear across the room, “I’d prefer you leave us alone, and do not talk to me ever again.” 

It took all your composure to turn around, and you glared a hole into Vernon’s chest. You felt your body bleed goosebumps around your arms and legs, not out of weather, but out of anxiety. You hugged yourself to shut the prickly feeling down. You heard Joshua do the only helpful thing this morning and it’s his soft utterances that finally pulled Mingyu out of the greenhouse. ,

What’s left is the drip of the hose, and the two of you, unmoved.

Thankful for the silence, you looked up at your companion, who was speechless. Vernon’s lower lip was puckered out slightly, face contorted as if to say I’m sorry, that kinda sucked. The tell-tale signs of emotional overload began to prick at your eyes. 

“I’m so sorry,” you wiped your face. Since when did you start crying? “I’m so sorry that I let all of this happen, and I let myself let this happen, and I’m such a mess and I’ve been trying to hide it all this time, but I’m selfish and I just wanted to see what would turn out of it.” 

“What are you apologizing for?” Vernon tried to lighten up the mood, and offered you an easy smile and reached for a hug.

“I’m sorry because I don’t know if I like you or not!” you outburst, and pushed him out of arm’s reach. “I feel so fucking guilty I just got out of a relationship and I can’t tell if I like you or I like your attention, honestly. And it isn’t fair because you’re just so sweet and kind and easy to love. Either way at the end of the summer I’m moving into the city for my full-time job. And I, I, I don’t know!” 

Vernon forced his way into your space, barely a foot apart. He didn’t touch you, but his warmth still emanated from the jacket you were wearing. He didn’t seem upset, then again you were probably upset enough for the both of you. 

“Hey, I offered to do your back because I knew you needed a distraction,” Vernon said softly, “no strings attached, ever. You do you, right? Focus on yourself.” 

You wished he was mean about this. It would’ve made it easier. “What if this is the last time we talk? What if I want to ignore you for the rest of the summer?” you murmured, already knowing you. should enjoy these final moments. 

“We’ll live,” he shrugged, and finally broke the space between you. His lips planted themselves between your forehead, melting away the lines that marred your brows apart, “and we’ll heal.”

The city was daring. The city was unforgiving. 

You tugged your scarf closer around your neck, which constricted your airflow but also prevented any possible windchill from slicing your neck. In your other hand you were hauling a week’s worth of work in a luggage that had once packed your things in August and sent you to this very career path. 

As much as you loved your new life, you wished things would be a little more boundless. The box of your workspace, the box of the elevator, and the box of your goshiwon apartment were starting to feel particularly stifling this weekend. 

It was Friday (or FriYay, as your co-workers dubbed) and that meant a weekend vegging out with a comfort meal and a new movie. There was a Burger King and a Gongcha under your apartment complex, both calling your name. 

Boba and burgers, the perfect way to end a week. 

You munched on your fries as you scanned the Gongcha menu, craving something sweet to contrast with your salty meal. 

It is then a low, sultry whisper sauntered in your direction (in a Gongcha, with children) and you almost choked on your fry. “I would know that back anywhere,” the offender drawled. 

What a strange pick-up line. The paper bag crinkled in your grip, and you turn around to see a familiar perky face in a scarlet Adidas tracksuit. Of all the places, he was here. 

“Hey, Flower Girl.” Minghao greeted, wiggling his fingers in a wave. He was on a tall stool, long legs splayed out and a cup of oolong milk tea hung lazily in his grip. His cup was at least 50% ice, and he was shaking the cup like a rattle every ten seconds.

“Normally, people would start with a simple hello,” you replied wryly, ushering him over to wait with you in line. 

“Normally,” Minghao shrugged, and slipped an arm around your shoulders as if you were long lost friends, “how have you been doing? Planting gardens for the spring?” 

“Please,” you scoffed. To Joshua and Wonwoo’s chagrin, you’ve forgotten a lot since the summer. “I can’t even make a corsage anymore, my brain’s on overload. What about you?” 

It looked like he was waiting for you to ask that. You barely got your order in before he started spitting out his story. “Didn’t you hear?” Obviously you didn’t, and he didn’t give you a chance to answer. “Two letters. RM.” Again, nothing. “The RM? The hottest rapper in Korea? Anyway, he was one of our clients in August—he got a sick design of a koala and an alpaca, cooler than you think—and gave us a massive tip on his Instagram story. We were famous overnight! We were getting crazy clients left and right—fuckin’ Sana wanted a little heart on her sternum, hottest thing.” 

“So you were able to relocate the parlor to the city?” 

“The big push was when Yoongi dropped RM his demo,” he shook his cup furiously, ice clanging, as if he never got tired of this story. “Like, I didn’t even know they were texting! I’ve been running the parlor mostly, I’ve always wanted to live in the city, but RM funded a lot of it and is helping Yoongi make his mix.”

In the back of your head, the question of an aspiring grad student was niggling in your brain, but you pushed it down. “So, if Yoongi’s working on his demo and you’re supposed to be running the parlor, why aren’t you there now?” you asked.

He stared at you as if it were the most obvious choice. “Because I’m here, drinking boba with you.” Minghao then grabbed your finished drink from the employee’s hand, ushering you out the door. “And now you’re going to follow me, because my break was over fifteen minutes ago.” 

“What?” 

“I have your boba,” he’s already out the door, waving your precious beverage like a fish to its line. “Hurry up, now I’m sixteen minutes late!” 

You groaned, lugging your suitcase full of work and now cold french fries back into the freezing weather. The wheels of your suitcase are cracking in exhaustion, mirroring yours. You just wanted your damn milk tea, hot fries, and a Netflix catch-up. What was the point of following Minghao to Nu ABO, when there was no reason to be there other than … 

“Oof!” your face slammed into Minghao’s back. The light was red. “Did Vernon move here too?” 

“Duh, who else would be covering for me?” 

“You’re trying to set me up!” You cried in betrayal, jabbing him in chest with your finger. “Y'know what, I’m just going to get another boba. You keep that.”

You two glared at each other. Minghao looked relentless, ignoring whoever was bumping into him on the streets. His eyes suddenly glinted to your rolling luggage, and he snatched it from your grip, running into the streets. 

“Can’t replace your work, right?” He laughed, forcing you to chase him down the block.

You felt sweat start to develop on your back, contrasting with the icy weather. Your work blazer and pinstripe loafers were not suited for vigorous activity. Minghao has an unfair advantage, being tall and athletic, and you had just finished half a bag of Burger King. Damn him. 

Minghao stopped in front of a sunken in building, with stairs leading downwards to a neon-lit parlor with the name glittering in electric periwinkle font. Flustered, you gasp at the cold air, finally able to stop. Despite having lost your breath ten meters ago, you managed to tell Minghao you’re proud that they have a real parlor. 

Your heart was beating in your ears, and you can’t tell whether it was because you haven’t worked out in months, or because Vernon was behind that door. 

Minghao dumped your luggage behind the reception area, and went straight into the artist room. This new parlor was much bigger, so when Minghao disappeared into a hallway he was out of your sight. You wait around, letting yourself sink into the familiar hip hop playlist. There are pictures littering the walls, all covered with a clean black frame. You see Yoongi and the supposed RM, sporting his koala and alpaca ink (which actually did look sick) and some photos of Minghao’s work, all of his designs being simultaneously colorful and graceful. 

It’s then in the epicenter of this wall is a long black frame that cut across the horizon, seven images of a woman with flowers and stars inking her back. 

Your back. 

“Beautiful, right? I’m sure it takes you back.” Minghao was over your shoulder, flicking his fingers between the photos. “Lots of customers have requested these designs. He never makes them the same way, though.”

Instead of answering, you followed Minghao down the hallway and into the artist room. Vernon had just finished with a client. Poking in head first, you saw him ticking off protocol off a printed list, speaking concisely. The client was listening intently, and you see he has an arm sleeve with peonies. It’s then he noticed Minghao intruding once more, and frowned. 

“Dude, you got milk tea without me?” Vernon said, affronted. 

“Ya didn’t ask.” Minghao vigorously shook the ice in your tea like a baby rattle. 

“You didn’t mention it, therefore I couldn’t have asked.” 

“You’re so smart, Hannie,” he beamed at him like a proud parent complimenting his son, “that’s why he’s going to grad school.” 

You let yourself in fully, and you felt shy as Vernon’s lips parted slightly upon realizing who his second guest was. 

“Hey,” Vernon exhaled, and gave you a small smile. He looked happy, content. As handsome as ever, he ran a gloved hand through his hair, soft curls bouncing as he shifted around the parting. “This is uh, a surprise.” his eyes flickered to Minghao, who held his arms out in a passive shrug. “A good one to end the week.” 

“Hi,” you bit your lip, feeling shy, “so, you decided to get certified and you’re going to grad school? I missed out on a lot.”

“That’s okay, we got time.” Vernon assured, “besides the fact that I got a project due tomorrow morning that I’ve barely started, and then I have a field trip I gotta go to on Sunday—”

Before it could drag on any longer, Minghao hacked out a very loud, and very fake cough. You broke out of the rêve, and muttered a “gimmie that” before snatching your precious bubble tea out of Minghao’s hand. 

Vernon mirrored the cough, more out of embarrassment than annoyance. “Lemme finish up with this client, yeah?” And he jerked his head back to the patient, going on about safety. 

Minghao led you out of the room, whispering a “you’re welcome” in your ear that taunted you for the rest of the night. 

Vernon finished at 5, just like he did back in the little shack at university square. He came out in a 2XL neon green hoodie, leading the client out the door and telling him to “take it easy”. As soon as the client’s gone, he comes over to you. You’re still staring at your pictures, as if you couldn’t believe that you were on display, looking like a tasteful nude model. 

“Hi again,” he said, dusting the imaginary dirt off his pants. 

“Hi,” you replied, feeling tingly at the sound of his voice. Did you really miss him that much? 

"Um, is it cool if I hug you?" 

It certainly has been awhile. You nodded, unsure if you could form a coherent response because you could tell Vernon was blushing and he was being too damn adorable for you to handle. 

Upon permission, he brightened. The warmth of his cotton hoodie enveloped you like the way hot chocolate feels after a cold day. You breathed in his scent, realizing how much you missed the scent of fresh laundry, especially on him. 

"How are you?” He asked casually.

“Uh, m'okay.” You answered softly, “a little cold nowadays." 

He hugged you tighter in response. With one more squeeze he let himself go, but kept you at an arm’s length. "Wanna get dinner?" 

You looked at him funny, "didn’t you say you had a project due tomorrow morning that you haven’t started?" 

Without missing a beat he altered, "Wanna get takeout? I’ll do work and eat while,” his eyes darted to your luggage, “you do work?" 

While you wanted to say that it was Friday (FriYay!) and you weren’t planning to open Pandora’s Box until Sunday night, you obliged and followed him to his place. 

On the way over, Vernon got his well-needed milk tea (and your second round) with two matching cartons of jajangmyeon. You trailed behind him rather than next to him, due to the fact that he was also lugging a Joshua-sized canvas on his back. In fear of being knocked out or ruining his work, you settled for walking a meter apart. 

Vernon lived on the second floor of his complex. You imagined a sizable one-room similar to your goshiwon, but you’re in awe when you see a fully furnished living room and kitchen. You smiled at the singular jade plant decorating the windowsill, one you remembered as Patricia Planty one session months ago. The hardwood was so shiny you could see your reflection in them. Kicking off your shoes, you stumbled over the kitchen countertop, reveling at the onyx granite. 

"I’ve never seen this much granite in my entire life!” You cried, spreading your hands over the cool rock. It was so well polished, you could see your reflection.  He was certainly living the high life this year. 

Vernon shook his head, setting the take out down and pulling out the containers. “It’s RM’s old place. I rent it out with the guys." 

"God, this is ten times better than my place! Your kitchen is bigger than my apartment!" 

He flicked your bowl of jajangmyeon over to your side of the countertop, the sauce and noodles premixed for you. "Eat up, babe.” He stuffed a radish in his mouth, now working to mix his own noodles, “we got a lotta catchin’ up to do." 

Whether it was your hunger or the casual use of the word "babe”, you abandoned the granite for now and did as told. 

An hour later, you’re flipping through their mounted TV, taking full advantage of their Disney+ subscription as Vernon is laying on the floor.  

“I thought you were working,” you chastised, letting yourself sink further into their couch. It was like resting on a big, fluffy marshmallow. You never wanted to leave. 

Vernon is splayed out like a starfish, papers and watercolors spread around him. His large body stood out against the white linoleum floor, his neon green hoodie reflecting on the shiny surface. “I am.” he replied blandly, “I’m waiting for lightning to hit me with a burst of inspiration." 

"Grad school’s biting you in the butt?" 

"Big time." 

Another bout of silence hit the two of you, and it was surprisingly nice. You finally started to notice that Vernon is picking up some art utensils and is doodling something. (He still is on the floor and hasn’t sat up properly, but progress is progress.) 

It felt oddly domestic, but you didn’t mind. There was no need to ask about the past, Kim Mingyu, or any other silly drama you two entrapped yourselves into last summer. What mattered now was the warmth of each other’s presence on this chilly night.

Your eyes are heavy and fighting against the long day, and before you know it, you’re asleep just as Rapunzel escapes Gothel’s tower. 

You haven’t awoken to the morning sun in a long, long time. While the notion sounded awfully depressing (because it was), you really didn’t have much of a choice because the goshiwon was closet sized, and closets had no windows. But today, the sun blasted you, forcing you up. This was accompanied by the the tell-tale sounds of breakfast, which was weird because you only ever ate cold food in your room, because there was zero ventilation. The scent of dark roast muddled your senses, forcing you awake. You twitched at the sudden stench, and snapped your back straight. Were your walls always this pristine white? 

"Didn’t know you were this early in the game, Flower Girl." 

You never went home. While Vernon was long gone and probably off presenting some haphazard art, Minghao and Yoongi (for the first time, in the flesh!) were watching you from their marbled island, while you rubbed the crusties out of your eyes. "Usually, encroaching on a significant other’s apartment is reserved for the 5th or 6th date.” Minghao teased, waving his Nutella toast in your face. 

“Oh, shut up,” you glared at Yoongi, who was slowly chewing on his own toast. There’s was black spark in his eyes, like he’s relishing on whatever has unfolded. “And you, you. I know this is the first time we’ve met and you haven’t said a word. But shut up too. Your thoughts are awfully loud.” 

You’re embarrassed, and you pull up your hands to mediate your fired cheeks. Instead of your palms, you feel worn cotton dabbing at your face. You wiggled your fingers under the neon green hoodie. Vernon put on his clothes for you to wear. You were in a very uncompromising position, and his roommates were reveling every second of it. 

Yoongi shrugged, throwing you a flippant grin. “Whatever you say, Flower Girl.” 

Contact emerged in the form of texts and images. You wondered how Vernon managed to keep things casual in light of how sudden your meeting was, but you relished in the way things fell naturally. 

[February 19, 2:10PM]

Vern: Is this still your number 

Vern: If so, here’s what i submitted for my project

Vern: IMG.934

Vern: if not, pls enjoy this picture of a pink platypus. the medium was watercolor nd if you’re curious, i got the idea from sunsets and phineas and ferb. Enjoy your day

You: hey look, there’s perry

Vern: nice

Vern: wait, this doesn’t confirm if ur u or a stranger

Vern: are u just a perry enthusiast 

Vern: evidence pls

[February 19th, 6:08PM]

You: IMG.48

[February 20th, 12:22AM]

Vern: ooh

Vern: look cute in my hoodie 

You’ve toggled with the idea of just cutting straight through the bush and asking him out the next time you see him in person. A little part of you liked the chase, however. That feeling where you’re tugging between friendship and something more, and you can’t help but feel like you’re fifteen everytime his name popped up in your messages. You self-dubbed it the-honeymoon-to-the-honeymoon phase. 

[February 27, 5:34PM]

Vern: what are you up to 

You: it’s hour 32. I’ve been under the covers and have survived solely on celery and honey-butter chips. currently binging all netflix comedies. debating on whether to send for help otherwise i may never get up

Vern: that’s the spirit 

By the time two weeks passed, you felt confident enough to ride off the mutually weird text messages and constant contact to meet with him. By then, you’re knees deep in the honeymoon-to-the-honeymoon phase. You’re languidly floating in that river, hoping you’re not rushing it by agitating the waters. 

[March 8th, 10:10PM]

You: hey

You: you up? 

Vern: nah. mastered the art of sleep textin

You: just wanted to ask if you could help me pick out a tatt that would fit me

You: if you were available. I’ve heard from the mullet-monster that you’re a hot commodity drowning in appts and deadlines

Vern: wait forreal? 

Vern: i can pencil u in. tomorrow night @11? 

You: so soon? What happened to being busy

Vern: not for u. Already have an idea in mind

By the time you arrived Saturday night, Minghao was slapping your back across the door, gabbing on about a “major banger” they were missing uptown. He looked the part, the only person you knew that could fill out an all-studded denim fit. Like a disco ball at a rodeo. He barely said good-bye before he hopped in a Lyft, cheering for freedom. 

You poked your head into the artist room, and saw Vernon playing on his phone. His fist dug into his cheek, carob pupils glazed over. You almost felt bad for wanting his attention this late.

“You usually do the day shift,” you commented quietly, holding up a bag with two milk teas in hand. 

Vernon looked up, illuminating in a half-smile. “Y’know me, always covering. Just for the hour though, this shouldn’t take long since we’re just looking at ideas.” 

He slapped a hand on the client chair. This one was much better than the cot they had in their shack. This one was pure leather and gleamed high quality. You placed your drinks on the countertop and eagerly bounced onto the seat. “Comfy,” you murmured, and wriggled your sneaker-clad feet.

“Good,” there’s a sharp snap from the plastic seal and Vernon is sipping into his milk tea seconds after you put it down. He’s chewing on a particularly large gulp, gnawing on pearls like no one’s business. With his rolling chair, he slid over to you, seamlessly reaching for your wrist. 

If he noticed that you’re wearing a particular neon item, he doesn’t comment. He turned on the overhead lamp, letting a soft white light bathe your form. When he finally spoke, he chanted your name in a sing-song, tapping your wrist in beat. It’s as if he  were envisioning the color blooming on your skin. 

You let him do his thing, and he pulled out his phone, scrolling through his gallery. You see pictures of his friends, some of his family, and digital art. He scrolled slower at the myriad of images: a colorful orca, lavender constellations, and budding roses. 

You were seeing a lot of flowers nowadays, with the burgeoning of spring and the recent ending of Valentine’s. It’s only now that you notice how apparent the theme is throughout the parlor, particularly in Vernon’s affinity. 

“Why don’t you call me it?” you asked softly, peering over his form to see him mulled over a picture of periwinkle lupines. 

“Huh,” he’s distracted, and has now swiped back to the colorful orca image. 

“Flower Girl,” you uttered, “they call me that, but you don’t.” 

Vernon clicked his phone down, the lupines flicked away. He peered at you through his lashes, the white overhead making his eyes appreciably bright. “Before I knew your name,” he started slow, making faces to himself as if he were debating on whether to tell you, “I’d call you Rose. You were always by the rose bush planted outside the shop.” 

“Avoiding work,” you crinkled your nose, however relished in the endearment, “being named after a rose is too big a compliment.” 

He snorted, “That’s what they said. Hence, Flower Girl was born,” he’s easy about it, but now he’s put his phone down and is rubbing circles in your wrist. You wonder if he felt how clammy your palms were getting from the minute intimacy. 

“You know what flower I’d compare to you?” you asked, “freesias.” 

“And what do those mean?” 

“Thoughtfulness,” the pad of his thumb still lingered on your skin, his grip painfully apparent. “And renewal.” 

“Why renewal?” 

“Because,” you swallowed, “you make me feel renewed. And this time I’m sure it’s because it’s you.” 

Vernon looked like he wanted to smile, trying so very hard not to embarass you whilst you poured your heart out with delicacy. His coral lips were tucked in a thin line, teeth biting at his lower lip. Drop by drop, he was going to accept that dew with as much care as possible. “Only me,” he inquired, pressing into your pulse. 

Your mouth was sand dry.  “Uh-huh.” You exhaled a breath long clutched in your throat, hot air fanning into Vernon’s face. He paid no mind, and (to no avail) was still trying to hold in his smile. “You’re dimples are showing,” you whined, poking the little dip in his cheeks with your free hand. “Use your words.” 

“Like?” he elongated, playing dumb. You supposed you earned his brand of torture, after all, seven months is a long time to make up for. 

“Like how we want the same thing?” you tried. 

“How do you know I want what you want?” he feigned, furrowing his thick brows. Acting could’ve been another career possibility for him, portrayed by the way his eyes were blown with confusion, his mouth parted like a kitten.  

“Oh, for fuck’s sake! Forget words!” you broke, nearly shaking from the nerves. 

It’s then that Vernon finally gave you a concrete response. His grip on your wrist was near painful as he eagerly tugged you closer, kissing you. There’s enthusiasm in every action from the way he pulled you closer, large hands melding to cup your cheeks. A little part of you is both breathless and invigorated at the energy stinging the room, and you can barely keep up until Vernon spilled kisses down your neck. 

He threw up the armrest holding him back, tucking his knee between your legs as he lapped you up, kissing you fully. The chair was much too small for the both of you, his large body pressing you further into the cushions. 

He sat up a bit, bumping his head on the lamp. He paid no mind. “By the way, I like you, too.” Vernon puttered cheekily, rubbing his scalp. Just as swiftly, he latches onto your neck and sucks at a sensitive spot. You can feel his teeth showing from the smile in his kisses. His thumbs rubbed lazily over your jaw, enjoying the feel of your soft skin under his rough palms. 

“Really,” you exhaled, relaxing against the headrest as Vernon’s wandering hands traveled lower. “Had no idea.” 

“But I’m happy,” Vernon is fumbly and sweet, mumbling in the crook of your neck while his fingers toyed with the waistband of your sweatpants, “happy you’ve healed, and happy for us.” 

He’s excited, almost too excited. The space between you two was warm, the lamp beating under your skin, awakening something between you two that was left behind that summer. It’s as if winter left him dormant, and you were the fresh flower waiting to be bloomed under his touch.

“Are you always,” you gasped, two fingers already worming their way inside your panties, “talkative at this part?” 

“Not if you wanna talk,” and the ever-zealous Vernon Chwe gets to work, sticking out his tongue in surprise when he finds that you’re already drenched. “Shit, you’re so beautiful,” he holds onto that word dearly, and pressed his forehead against yours, “I’ve always wondered what it would be like to hold you like this,” he reached for your delicious bud, and you felt your senses flower into pleasure. 

He makes a noise, low in his throat as he watched you melt against the seat. “I like you like this,” he said thickly, his voice matching the slick sounds emitting from yourself. “Comfy, relaxed. You always looked so stuffy in those work suits,” you feel wholly undeserving of this worship, as he licked a long strip from your collarbone to your neck, “would love to help you chill out a lil’ more.” 

A whine bubbled from the back of your throat, your eyes rolling shamelessly as you feel the pads of his fingers working circles between your folds. “Ah, I’ve—I’ve fantasized about this,” you confessed, “every time you’d ink my back. At one point we just stopped covering myself with those stupidly thin gowns. All you had to do was turn around.” Vernon blinked rapidly, mental pictures ticked like film in his pupils. His hands stuttered across your slick, inserting two fingers between your folds as you continued. His pace was slow, yet purposeful as he made sure you felt him with every thrust. Rings adorned his fingers, and the cool sensation surprised you. You shivered in pleasure. “Mm, I’ve imagined us kinda like this in that little shack, hard against the cot overlooking the shop,” 

“Dirty,” he said, as if recalling the weather. 

“And ah—wondering what kind of tattoos you have,” and in your haze you reached for him, your hand gripping firm at his gunmetal belt buckle. You tucked your fingers between the button of his light wash jeans, palming the telltale signs of something hard, “please? You’ve done too much for me, lemme return the favor.” 

“Not now,” he pressed his forehead to yours, “you can guess my ink on our way home.”

“Wha?“ You’re dazed, feeling warm with affection and drowned in the moment. You feel his fingers, slowly pumping out of its rhythm and resting on your thigh. You groaned at the premature end, his shiny digits resting on your fleece sweats. 

“They’ll kill me, this is new leather,” Vernon said, “and now we can afford security cameras, which are so small even I can’t find them.” 

“Unbelievable,” you laughed. You’re not frustrated, only endeared. 

“Besides, I’d rather have our first time somewhere private. Undisturbed,” he pressed a kiss to your forehead, "somewhere where there’s lots of granite." 

You melted, pulling at his collar to pepper kisses on his nose. The mention of coming home to his pretty kitchen was icing on the cake. "You know how much I love your granite." 

(After your granite fantasy was fulfilled, you spent the rest of the weekend huddled in Vernon’s room. You’re living off take out and mutually satisfied with the unhealthy means. When you’re not eating or watching movies, the two of you are drafting your first piece. 

Freesias and pink roses.)

(His tattoo was also very cute.) 

[kerikaaria]

If I Never Met You: Chapter 35

(??? X Reader) Idol!AU, Manager!Reader

Genre: (PG13) Fluff and angst

WC: 2.6k

Warnings: None

Series Masterlist

Chapter 34 | Chapter 35 | Chapter 36

“Do you need anything else before I go?” the nurse asked after she set the food on the counter where you could reach it.

“No, I should be good for the rest of the day,” you said. “Thank you.”

“I will see you tomorrow then,” she smiled, bowing slightly as you returned the farewell before she left.

Once the door closed behind her, you sighed, resting your head back against the headrest of the chair and looking up at the ceiling. It had been more than a week since your mom had to leave to go back home, and with the boys constantly practicing and rehearsing for their comeback that was coming up next week, you were spending most of your time alone now.

It wouldn’t have been as bad if you didn’t feel so helpless. Stuck in your chair, you could get around the apartment as you wanted, but you couldn’t move freely. you could hardly change into clean clothes, and you couldn’t cook for yourself or get into the shower on your own. You couldn’t even climb into bed to lay down without help. If you tried to, you’d be sure to put pressure on your feet and not only would that hurt, but you could also undo any progress your legs were making to heal.

To your friends’ credit—both BTS and your other friends—they talked in the group chats as much as possible, in between all of their busy schedules, in an effort to help you not feel lonely. That at least did periodically distract you from the negative feelings that would come through every now and then while you sat here alone and unable to do almost anything.

Overall, you had made very good progress on keeping your anxiety under control. But now—feeling so helplessly dependent, being alone for such long periods of time, and not working or having much else to do—your thoughts had ample time to sit and ruminate in your head. You found that your negative feelings were not really focused on anything in particular but rather just a general sense of melancholy. It didn’t take long to realize that was even worse because how were you supposed to reason with your thoughts when they had no real meaning to them?

Unfortunately, it seemed everyone was busy right now and you were left to find some way to pass the time on your phone. There was only so much Pokémon Shuffle you could play before it got boring.

Despite it still only being the afternoon, your eyelids began to feel heavy. And while it wasn't the most comfortable place to sleep, it wouldn't have been the first time you took a nap in the wheelchair so you let your eyes close and head rest back to try to relax and recharge.

You weren’t sure how long you managed to take a light, dreamless nap before it was disturbed by the sound of a lock clicking, followed by the sensation of moving. You slowly opened your eyes and looked behind you to see it was Hoseok pushing you toward your bedroom. The boys and Sejin both had spare keys to your apartment now so they could come in even if you couldn’t get to the door, just in case.

“Hobi, you rasped out, your voice affected by your sleepy state. “What’s up?”

He chuckled lightly. “I came to check on you, noona. You’re tired today?”

You nodded as he stopped the chair next to your bed. “What time is it?”

“It’s about 4 in the afternoon,” Hoseok replied. “If you’re going to nap, it’d be better to do it on your bed, don’t you think?” he asked.

You grunted as a form of agreement, but made no effort to move. Hobi took the moment to move the chair’s foot pedals to the side.

“You gotta help me just a little bit so I can get you out of this chair, noona,” Hoseok said, shaking you slightly to help you wake up a little more.

You scooched forward a little and lifted your arms to place them around his neck as Hobi knelt down to wrap his around your waist. He carefully but quickly picked you up, letting you put as much weight as you could on him so you didn’t put any on your feet, before gently sitting you down on the bed. He helped you shuffle underneath the blanket before moving the chair and sitting on the edge of your bed next to you.

“You’re done with practice early,” you said. “You guys usually stay until late.”

“Sejin hyung let me come home to get some rest,” Hoseok said. “I wasn’t really at my best today.”

Looking at his face, you could see that he was clearly feeling down. It wasn’t often that he let that show, so you knew it had to be pretty significant. Growing concerned, you found yourself feeling more awake and sat up. “What’s wrong, Hobi?”

He offered you a smile, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “I’m fine, noona. Just having an off day, don’t worry about me. You should finish your nap.” Hoseok gently pushed on your shoulder to get you to lay down again, but you grabbed his hand and held it in yours, frowning.

“I can tell that you’re upset. Please don��t lie to me,” you insisted.

Hoseok sighed and looked away. “I’ll be fine,” he replied. “You know me, I bounce back easily. Just get some rest, noona.”

“No, I’m not sleepy anymore. Not when I’m worried about you, Hobi.”

“You’re so stubborn.” He chucked a little. “You’re not letting this go, are you?”

You didn’t reply, only raising your eyebrows in response.

Hoseok slowly nodded once, taking a moment before opening up. “It’s just, I feel so much pressure,” he said quietly, almost in a whisper. “And I just feel at such a loss right now, like I’m not sure what I’m doing here.”

“What do you mean?” you asked, growing more concerned by the second.

While Hoseok seemed to put together his thoughts for what he wanted to say next, you moved over on the bed and scooched up to sit against the wall at the head of the bed. You lightly tugged on his arm to gesture for him to sit next to you. He seemed surprised by the silent suggestion, but you just smiled at him and he eventually relented. Once he did, you entwined my fingers with his and laid your head on his shoulder.

He leaned his head on top of yours, seeming to relax a little with the physical affection. “You know when it gets this close to a release we work extra hard to be as perfect as we can be when we perform. And I just feel like I’m not doing as good as I can, as I should be. I’m supposed to help the others learn the choreography and work on it, but I keep messing up. And then-” he cut himself off with a sigh. “I was told to go on a really strict diet. I was told that I gained weight and I don’t look good and I have to lose it before the comeback.”

You couldn’t stop yourself from straightening up, surprised at hearing that. Taking a quick look at his figure, you couldn’t understand where that had come from. “Who said that to you?”

Hoseok didn’t answer right away, clearing his throat a bit before saying, “Bang PD-nim.”

You were sad to hear that, but not necessarily surprised. While Bang was very much a great man, he was also strict as well. In many ways he had shown you time and again that he cared for his employees like family, but there were also many times where he drew a hard line and would become almost cold compared to the man you had become used to seeing. And if it was Bang PD telling Hoseok to diet, there wasn’t really anything Sejin or you could say or do to counter it.

You placed your head back on his shoulder, taking a moment to think of what to say. “Well first of all, it’s okay for you to have times when you’re a bit off, maybe not doing your best. But you are such an amazing dancer and if I know you, this slump you seem to have found yourself in isn’t going to last. And second… I’m sorry I can’t really do anything about Bang PD telling you to diet. But I can tell you that I think you look perfectly fine. You know him, he’s probably just being extra picky. But please promise me that you’ll still do your best to eat enough.”

“I’ll try my best, noona,” Hoseok said. “I know I’ll probably get out of whatever this is soon, but I’m just stressing because our comeback is next week.”

“Well, then take this time to destress,” you suggested. “Sejin let you come home early so take advantage of it and do something for yourself.”

“I just feel like sleeping,” Hoseok chuckled.

“Well, perfect timing then,” you said, shuffling your body down the bed a little so you could lay down flat. “Take a nap with me.”

“What?” he asked, eyes wide. “Here?”

“If you want,” you said. “I just thought having some company would help you feel a little better. If it’s too awkward, you don’t have to.”

Hoseok seemed to think about it for a moment before slowly shifting lower to lay next to you. “I don’t mind napping here with you,” he said quietly, almost in a whisper.

You smiled. “Let’s take a nap, Hobi. Then we can eat dinner and play a game or something, okay?”

“That sounds great, noona,” he said, getting comfortable.

As the two of you started drifting off into dreamland, you vaguely registered him saying, “Thank you.”

-----

It was only a day or two later when Hoseok told you that he was back on top of his game with dancing. Unfortunately, he still did need to diet, but that afternoon of R&R really seemed to do him some good in resetting his mind so he didn’t mind it as much.

You still wished that Bang PD wouldn’t be quite so harsh with how the boys needed to look—this wasn’t anywhere close to being the first time he told one of them to diet. But there wasn’t much you could do about that so you just did my best to support your boys where you could (and maybe snuck a snack for them once or twice).

BTS was now busy with their comeback promotions for their new mini album, The Most Beautiful Moment in Life Pt. 1 and so you’ve been spending even more time by yourself. But seeing the fans’ response to their main track, I Need U had been amazing. It seemed that they gained more attention this time compared to previous comebacks and people were really loving the song and the performance along with it.

You felt like the whole album seemed to be much more theirs—not quite the style they debuted with but melding more into a sound that fit them better and that set them apart from others. It seemed that the fans, both old and new, were definitely enjoying the different style the boys were heading toward.

You intently watched another of their performances for the evening music shows, missing being there with them. You couldn’t go since you’d just get in the way and become a safety hazard both for yourself and others backstage, but there was no way you’d miss any of their performances. You made sure to watch every single one on TV.

When the show was coming to an end, the five artists in the running to win for the night appeared on the screen, BTS being one of them. They started revealing the numbers from the three categories that added up, determining the winner.

In the first round of numbers, BTS was the highest. You watched intently as the second numbers appeared on the screen, again with the boys getting the highest score. Your heartbeat sped up as you suddenly became nervous. Could it be that this might be the first time they got a win?

The last set of numbers wasn’t as clear, another group getting the largest score on that one. But then the totals appeared at the bottom, and one group very obviously surpassed the others, having over 8,000 points.

And it was BTS.

BTS got their first win at a music show. Almost two years into their careers, and they finally did it!

Continuing to watch the program, it was easy to see how happy and excited they all were. They were all smiling so brightly, and as the hosts finished up and I Need U began to play, You swore you could even see a few tears. You knew you felt some prickling at the corners of your own eyes.

This was amazing. BTS got their first music show win!

You tried your best not to text them out of excitement, wanting to reserve your congratulations for when they got home. Instead, after the show had ended you spent some time browsing through twitter to see the fans’ reactions to them winning tonight.

It was no surprise to see so many Army just as happy and excited as you were for their win. It was easy to get lost in the sea of congratulatory tweets to pass the time, and before you knew it there was a knock at your door.

You called to let them know it was okay to come in, and as soon as the words you’re your mouth the door swung open. In a quick blur, Jungkook and Taehyung had managed to engulf you in an awkward hug.

“Noona!” Jungkook yelled excitedly, definitely too close to your ear. “You saw, right?”

“Of course I did,” you said as both boys let go of you. “You know I wouldn’t miss any of your shows.”

“We won!” Tae cheered. “We actually won!”

“I’m so happy for you guys,” you said, entirely honest. “I wish I could have been there with you.”

“Don’t worry about that,” Yoongi said, shaking his head.

“You were with us in spirit,” Jin said. “I could feel your presence, it was almost like you really were right there next to us.”

“Stop being dramatic,” Joon said, lightly shoving his hyung and rolling his eyes.

Everyone managed to enter your apartment and settled in, closing the door.

“While we’re here, do you need anything?” Hoseok asked.

“No, I’m good,” you replied. “I had dinner and everything. I’ll just need to get into bed before you guys leave. But anyway, you guys won tonight! Seriously, I’m so happy for you!”

“Yeah, our first win,” Namjoon smiled. “It’s a bit surreal. Especially because of the gap between us and the others. Did you see those scores?”

“Yeah, we had more than 1,000 more points than the rest!” Jimin said, excitedly.

You smiled fondly while the boys continued to discuss their win and how the show went tonight.

Eventually, the long day started to wear on them and the conversation became sporadic and muted. You would have shooed them back to their own home by now if you didn’t know that they didn’t have to be up early tomorrow. But for now, you relished in the time you were able to spend with your friends that you missed all too much recently.

You were listening to Taehyung animatedly telling a story about his brother and sister when Hoseok suddenly gasped, eyes wide at whatever was displaying on his phone screen.

Taehyung paused his story, turning to look at his hyung. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

Hoseok looked at you before saying, “There’s an article that’s getting a lot of attention on twitter. It’s about your accident, noona.”

Series Masterlist

Chapter 34 | Chapter 35 | Chapter 36

Tags: @calling-dips-on-j-hope @misohime @netflix-batman-sleep @smallbaby-cat @leitholdwithlove @ramyagovindraj​ @leesalts​ @rjsmochii @overtherainbow35

Send me a message or ask if you want tagged! And also feel free to leave comments or send asks to just talk to me!

[caught-in-a-seesaw-stigma]

Peripheral, Part 6

Author’s Note: Jin is so much fun to write! This is coming out a little later than I expected, but I hit a little block in the middle of it. I think it turned out pretty good though. Enjoy and look forward to the next POV (already in progress). Let me know what you guys think of the story so far! 

Pairings: OT7 x reader; Jin x reader

Series Summary:  An unfortunate accident leaves Kim Namjoon with amnesia, and Big Hit, BTS, ARMY, and the entire world is desperate to help him regain his memories and knowledge. Fortunately, a new genetics company has successfully created a system to alter our brains into human databases which can help someone regain knowledge and memories through a simple input/output exchange. Can this new invention give us back our beloved leader?

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut, Idol AU

Warnings: NSFW, 18+ cursing, dirty talk, food play, fingering, Jin learning Spanish, soft Dom Jin, daddy kink, teasing, orgasm denial, hair pulling, ass play, cream pie, shower sex, oral sex (female receiving), spanking, squirting, aftercare king Jin

Word Count: 9K+

“Y/N-ah, can you hand me those bottles by the coffee maker?” asked Jin sweetly. “I need to marinate the meat while we finish preparing the rest of the tteokguk.”

After grabbing the bottles of sesame oil, mirin, soy sauce, and rice wine from the counter, Y/N made her way over to Jin with a buoyant smile on her face. She was learning the ins and outs of Korean cuisine from a true lover of food who had absolute finesse in the kitchen. His knowledge was boundless as was his tendency to flirt while preparing the dish.

“Thank you, gorgeous,” murmured Jin playfully. “You can put those right here next to this bowl. Can you please check on the rice cakes and make sure they’re thawing out in that water?”

Before she could shuffle off to check, he leaned in to kiss Y/N on the cheek to thank her for bringing over the marinade ingredients. He’d been like this since Jimin and Taehyung finished up the dishes and wandered off to their room. His playfulness was almost on par with his flirtatious nature, and he wasn’t holding anything back.  It was like they were a newlywed couple making dinner in their new home. Y/N couldn’t tell if this change in demeanor was a result of their earlier conversation or because he was preparing food for his beloved best friend.

A little column A, a little column B?

“The rice cakes are almost ready, Jinnie,” Y/N chirped. “Shall I bring them over to you, precioso?”

“Hey!” he exclaimed hotly. “If you’re going to start calling me cute names in Spanish, then I’m going to have to start using Korean words on you, jagiya.”

“Is that so, chulo?” she purred while reaching up to pinch his cheek. “I hope you have more ammunition than I do.”

“Oh, just you wait, naesarang,” he countered, pulling her into his arms. “This could go on for quite some time.”

The two of them grinned at each other ridiculously, and it almost seemed like Jin was going to lean in to kiss Y/N, but then the kitchen timer went off. Y/N slid her arms up and around Jin’s neck and pulled his reddened ear down to her lips.

“Jinnie, mi amor,” she cooed. “I think the broth is ready.”

Before she released him, she placed a light kiss to his neck, just below his ear and giggled wickedly when Jin shuddered against her.

“Oh man, gongjunim,” he groaned lightly. “You play dirty. Such a bad girl.”

Y/N winked at him and then bounced off to collect the eggs from the refrigerator. Jin had tasked her with making the egg garnish while he finished the broth and brisket.

After setting the steaming broth aside on the stove, Jin pulled out a saucepan for Y/N to use while she prepared the eggs. He had to admit that he was overcome with blinding contentment.

It actually feels like I’m cooking dinner with my wife. This is so nice.

“Why the big smile, Jin-Jin?” questioned Y/N. “Thinking about me?”

“Of course, jagi,” teased Jin. “What else could bring a smile like this to my handsome face?”

Jin swept his hand across his face for emphasis and made a big show of blowing a kiss across the kitchen to her. She rolled her eyes in response, but the smile never left her face. They were both enjoying this little game way too much. It was only a matter of time before one of them took it a step too far.

What’s “too far,” really?

Y/N studied the eggs she’d separated and beaten into glass bowls and thought about what seasoning she would need to add. Her bottom lip unknowingly slipped in between her teeth as the wheels in her head turned.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Jin chastised her from across the kitchen. “If you keep it up, I’ll have to punish you, yeonin.”

Confusion fluttered across Y/N’s features as she tilted her head at Jin. He was smirking as he mixed the meat and marinade together by hand. She arched an eyebrow when he looked at her and he shook his head at her and groaned.

“Yah, that lip,” he pointed out. “If you keep biting on it like that, I’m not going to be able to control myself. Behave yourself, aein, or you’re going to regret it.”

Y/N pouted and glanced down at her lips and then back at Jin. The temptation to defy Mr. Tall, Lean, & Handsome was difficult to resist, but they were literally in the middle of something important. She watched as he covered the meat with plastic wrap and then walked over to check on the rice cakes thawing on the counter.

Hmmm, maybe later.

Meanwhile, she stepped in front of the spice cabinet and started rooting around for the essentials. She found the salt fairly easily, but she was having trouble reaching the ground pepper. The container was just beyond her grasp. Jin noticed her struggle and stepped behind her to help.

“Need some help, yeppeo?” Jin murmured into her hair. “Is my angel too short to reach?”

“Jin,” Y/N whined while still reaching for the container of ground pepper. “Don’t just stand there, help me.”

Instead of handing her the container, Jin wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a back hug. She slammed her palms onto the counter in defeat as he nuzzled into her hair. His hands shifted to hold her hips in place, and Y/N let out a frustrated huff and leaned her head back onto his chest.

“How is that helpful?” Y/N pouted. “You were supposed to hand me that pepper, querido.”

“You know, this isn’t really fair,” Jin suddenly muttered. He released his grip and stepped away from her. Y/N turned around to face him and was relieved to see that he just appeared contemplative and not upset.

“What’s not fair, Jin-ah?” asked Y/N. “Is something wrong?”

“Yeah, there is,” he confirmed. “You know what all my Korean words mean, but I don’t understand your Spanish words. You need to teach me these words. Maybe I can use them to show my love for all the Latin ARMY.”

Y/N erupted into giggles at his serious expression. He genuinely wanted to acquire this new vocabulary for the sole purpose of addressing his fans in their native tongue. It was almost too cute to bear.

“Ok, Jinnie,” agreed Y/N. “I will teach you some words in Spanish while we cook. Just let me know what words and I will teach you how to pronounce them properly. Sound good?”

“Yes,” Jin beamed. “Maybe I’ll practice by using them on you.”

He winked at her and she shook her head with a chuckle. He lifted her chin so she could look him in the eyes and he leaned forward slowly. She blinked twice and his face kept descending closer and closer to her own. A sharp intake of breath and a flutter of closing eyelashes later and Y/N felt soft lips on her forehead and a small container placed into her hands. She opened her eyes and looked down at the tin of ground pepper in her hands and she pursed her lips and nodded her head in amusement.

Jin booped her on the nose and grinned. He was clearly happy with her reaction.

“What’s the matter, Y/N-ah,” he cooed at her. “Was my gongjunim expecting something else?”

“Princesa,” she corrected. “Princess in Spanish is princesa. It’s the equivalent of gongjunim in Korean.”

“Plin-seh-sa?” Jin attempted with a grimace. “I can’t get the “r” sound to come out like yours.”

“It takes practice, Jinnie,” she said encouragingly. “Try to roll the “r” with your tongue so it doesn’t sound so much like an “l” sound.”

Y/N continued to help Jin with his pronunciation as they continued preparing the tteokguk. Jin practiced his new word over and over again. Within a few minutes, he’d felt comfortable enough to toss it into their conversation. Y/N was rolling the egg omelets and cutting them into strips while he finished cooking the meat, and he felt a surge of pride watching her excellent knife skills.

“Very good, princesa,” he praised. “With your skills, we could create some delicious things in this kitchen, yeah?”

Y/N shivered at his accent. His voice dropped an octave as he rolled his “r” and morphed into something sultry and provocative. The timbre of his voice evoked multitudinous images in her mind and she struggled to shove them aside as she finished preparing the garnish.

After packing the egg garnish into a container, Y/N leaned against the counter and watched as Jin put the finishing touches on the tteokguk. It smelled incredible and there was no doubt about the superb flavor combinations he’d created. He ladled a hearty portion into a large travel thermos and picked up another container to pack additional sides to be added as needed. He knew what Namjoon liked, but he didn’t want to assume that his food preferences were still the same.

“Ok, that’s done,” Jin announced happily. “I still feel like I might be forgetting something though.”

“Well,” Y/N pondered aloud. “You packed up the main dish and garnish and several sides. What about a dessert?”

“Oh!” Jin gasped loudly. “I forgot to make one! I don’t even know if we have anything to make something here. Should I just look for sweet snacks in the pantry?”

Y/N sensed the rising panic and decided to allay his impending breakdown. She walked over to the cupboards and started pulling out dry ingredients.

“Do you have any cooking oil?” she implored. “I think you have everything I would need to make churros. We’ll just need to locate a few more items for the chocolate dipping sauce.”

“We love churros!” Jin proclaimed excitedly. “I’ll get the pot and oil ready.”

He planted a quick kiss on her cheek and gathered up the pot and cooking oil, making sure to grab a pair of metal tongs and a napkin covered plate to drain the churros after they were fried.

After mixing up the churro batter, Y/N grabbed a plastic storage bag and repurposed it as a piping bag. After making sure the oil was hot enough, she piped in a few churros and started frying the batter off bit by bit.

Meanwhile, Jin was running around the kitchen foraging for the chocolate to use for the dipping sauce. He already had the tray of cinnamon sugar set up for Y/N, and he had the other ingredients she’d requested, but he was having trouble locating any chocolate.

He leaned against the table and he suddenly remembered that Hoseok had once mentioned that there was a special spot in the pantry where Jimin would hide his dark chocolate bars. He pushed aside every item on the shelf until he located a small box on the bottom shelf with a cute cat graphic on it. Inside we’re two pristine bars of dark chocolate.

Jackpot!

Y/N was placing the last of the churros in the cinnamon sugar and arranging the completed ones in a parchment paper-lined box. She turned to Jin and perked up when she noticed the chocolate bars in his hand.

“Sweet!” she cheered. “That’s all we were missing.”

Jin slid the bars over to her on the counter and picked up the heavy cream and spices she’d pulled out for the sauce. As he walked over to her, he was overcome with a growing fondness for this magical kitchen fairy he’d been gifted.

The others helped him in the kitchen when they could, but Y/N was a true partner in the kitchen. She solved problems he didn’t anticipate and she had amazing skills and culinary knowledge which complemented his own. Jin’s heart swelled with affection as he watched her pour heavy cream into a glass bowl and then place it over a pot of boiling water.

“Jin, lindo,” Y/N asked while gently stirring the heating cream. “Can you break up those chocolate bars into little pieces and put them in that other glass bowl? Once this cream is hot enough, I’m going to pour it on top to melt the chocolate.”

“Whatever you need, princesa,” he purred, rolling his “r” effortlessly. “I’m only here to serve you.”

That saccharine comment earned him yet another eye roll and playful grin. Jin grabbed a cutting board and knife and skillfully chopped both chocolate bars and scraped them into the bowl. He quickly washed the few dishes in the sink, and when he turned back to help her with the sauce, she was stirring in the spices with a small spatula.

“Jin-Jin,” Y/N called out. “Come try this sauce and tell me what’s missing.”

Jin eyed the small spoon she held out to him and popped it into his mouth. He swirled the chocolate around in his mouth and then swallowed. He furrowed his brow and shifted his balance into a pensive pose.

“What is it missing?” Y/N wondered aloud. She dipped her finger into the sauce and brought it up to her lips.

Long slender fingers wrapped around her wrist and stopped her from tasting the sauce collected on her fingertip. She gasped as she traced them up Jin’s arm and then focused on his fiery gaze. He smirked at her and pulled her finger to his lips and then enveloped the chocolate covered digit with his full lips.

Y/N closed her eyes when she felt the flick of Jin’s tongue as it gathered the chocolate and then gulped with the gentle sucking sensation as he swallowed. The soft hum he released sent a shiver down her spine.

When she opened her eyes, Y/N shivered at the intensity on Jin’s face and the dilation of his pupils which gave his eyes a steamy bedroom quality.

“That’s what was missing,” he quipped. “Nothing in this kitchen is sweeter than you, jagiya.”

She was tempted to scoff at his cheesy comment, but his boldness was intoxicating. Y/N parted her lips to issue a snappy comeback but floundered when she tracked Jin’s tongue swiping across his full lips. The sharp intake of breath she released did not go unnoticed, and Jin reached up to tilt her chin up to meet his eyes.

“What’s wrong, pretty girl?” Jin cooed. “Do you want something?”

Y/N cleared her throat and chuckled nervously. She tried to move her head away from him, but Jin only pulled her closer and wrapped his arms around her waist. He reached up and caressed the blush blooming across her cheeks with his thumb. The air in the kitchen was quickly charged with sexual tension, and Y/N struggled to understand how Jin managed to pull her under his spell without warning. The game they were playing earlier was somewhat innocent, but now it was just rife with sinful thoughts.

Jin trailed his fingertips across the apron strings along Y/N’s back and then slowly pulled on them to release the knot.

“Let’s get this apron off of you, Y/N-ah,” Jin murmured while reaching up to stroke her hair. “You won’t be needing it anymore.”

“I won’t?” Y/N gulped as the apron was lifted from her neck and placed on the counter. “Why is that?”

Jin ran his hands over her shoulders and continued in a downward path until they reached her hips. The slight trembles Y/N released filled him with such satisfaction. He’d seen her exercise her dominance over the others, so it felt wonderful to watch her lose her composure under his watchful eyes.

I wonder how far I can push her before she starts to push back.

With his curiosity piqued, Jin leaned his face down into the crook of her neck. Y/N’s hands reached forward and lightly grasped at Jin’s soft pink shirt. With every brush of Jin’s lips across her neck, her grasp on his shirt tightened. It was only a matter of moments before he slid his hands over her ass and then behind her thighs. Jin skillfully lifted Y/N and then placed her on the counter with her discarded apron beneath her.

“I need to put the food away before we play,” Jin explained, while placing a soft kiss on her exposed collarbone. “Stay here and don’t move. If you don't behave, you’ll have to be punished.”

Jin backed away to put the rest of the food and ingredients away and turned around to glance at his flustered kitchen fairy on the counter. Y/N was sitting with her legs crossed and she was smoothing out her clothes and hair. The material of her blouse billowed as she shook out some flour from it. Jin caught a glimpse of her belly as the blouse was lifted and the sight of her bare skin set his growing desire ablaze.

Jin grabbed the last remaining bowl and pure mischief etched a grin across his flawless features.

It’s time to play.

“Ok, Y/N-ah,” Jin teased while placing the bowl on the counter behind her. “Since you’ve been such a good girl, I’m going to give you a choice.”

“Oh yeah?” Y/N sassed him, obviously recovered from her momentary lapse of control. “What are my options?”

Jin smiled at her and moved his arms to her sides so he could keep her from leaving the counter. Jin slid his hands down her thighs and he gripped her knees firmly. He waited for her to look him in the eye before he winked at her and then spread her legs apart. He used this distraction to pull her forward and into his arms. To keep her balance, she wrapped her legs around Jin’s midsection and kept her palms against his firm chest.

Y/N was trapped. She unconsciously pulled her lip between her teeth and lifted her gaze to meet his own.

“Now that I have your full attention, you little minx,” Jin explained. “I will give you your options. Please listen carefully, jagiya.”

Y/N huffed out a shaky exhale and her eyes flitted back and forth between the fire building in Jin’s eyes. There was a mischievous twinkle skipping around his dilated pupils, and it was strikingly familiar to the look she remembered Jungkook giving her on the couch.

Just what has Jin been teaching the maknae?

“We can do this two ways,” Jin continued, rubbing his hands up and down her back. “We can keep everything nice and clean or we can get a little dirty. Does my princesa want to stay clean or does she want to be a dirty girl?”

“Por que no las dos?” Y/N shrugged. “Can we get a little dirty and then clean it up?”

“Oh, I like the way you think,” Jin hummed in approval. “You’re so smart, jagi.”

Jin reached up and smoothed Y/N’s hair back, stopping at the hair tie holding her tucked ponytail in place. He wrapped one hand around the base and pulled her head back slightly to expose her neck. She yelped in response and Jin took a moment to appreciate the vulnerability she expressed in a shudder.

With his free hand, Jin dipped his finger into the bowl behind Y/N and spread a line of chocolate sauce down her exposed neck. She inhaled sharply as the warm sauce touched her skin, cutting her sharp eyes to Jin when he lifted his finger to his lips.

“Hmmm,” Jin mused. “I really need to work on my handwriting. I misspelled my name. Let me fix that.”

With another couple of dips into the sauce, Jin traced out the ㅈ & ㄴ missing from his name. Y/N proudly bore the chocolate 진 across her neck and Jin took a moment to admire his handiwork while licking the excess sauce from his fingers.

“Mind if I capture this beautiful moment, jagi,” Jin asked while taking out his phone. “Who knows when I’ll be able to do something like this again?”

Y/N nodded and sighed in response and then closed her eyes. With Jin’s grasp on her hair, she was unable to move and the idea that Jin marked her as his own with chocolate was increasing the dampness of her panties. His desire to take a picture of her in this vulnerable state just fueled her desire for him even more.

Click. Click. Click.

After getting pictures from three different angles, Jin seemed satisfied with his results. He put his phone back in his pocket and leaned down to nip at Y/N’s jawline. She twitched in his grasp and moaned slightly. The chocolate on her neck felt sticky and cool, but that was the least of her concerns.

“Shhhh,” Jin whispered sweetly into her ear. “My pretty girl got herself all dirty. Daddy needs to clean her up.”

Y/N eyelids flew open at Jin’s words.

Daddy?!

Without wasting another second, Jin dropped his plush lips to Y/N’s neck and planted a wet kiss right in the middle of his chocolate name. With his skillful tongue and a little suction, he was able to get the ㅈ off her neck first. The sensation on her neck pushed past Y/N’s composure threshold and she released a soft airy moan as he moved on to the next letter of his name. He smirked and pressed a soft chocolatey kiss to her lips, attempting to placate her in some small way.

“You have to be quiet, princesa,” Jin reminded her. “You don’t want us to get caught, do you?”

Y/N licked her lips and shook her head as best she could, and Jin chuckled softly at her quick compliance. He rewarded her with another kiss and she hummed happily against his lips. The kiss was meant to be a small segue back to the chocolatey goodness on her neck, but Jin’s interests shifted when he felt her tongue swiping across his lips. His grip on her ponytail loosened and Jin gripped her jaw so he could pull her closer. The heated kiss soon added groping to the mix and the two of them feverishly made out in the kitchen.

With the situation escalating at an alarming rate, Jin felt a nagging pull at his subconscious.  He hadn’t initially intended to make any serious advances on Y/N so soon, but circumstances dictated otherwise. In the midst of their passionate kisses, Jin managed to form one thought through his lust-fueled haze.

If I’m going to give in to her, I need to do it for the right reasons. This shouldn’t be about me and my wants. I need to think of Namjoon and his needs.

“Y/N-ah,” Jin muttered in between kisses. “Do the thing. If we’re going to do this, let’s make it count, yeah?”

She was somehow able to calm herself down enough to strike up an impromptu transaction session in the middle of their seemingly endless kisses. As soon as the vibrations hit Jin’s lips, he groaned and pushed his hips against her own.

“Oh, I was not expecting that,” Jin groaned, leaning into the waves of pleasure coursing across his body. “You couldn’t give me a warning or something, woman?”

“You should have read the instructional materials you were sent,” Y/N fired back while slipping her hands under his shirt. “It’s not my fault you were being so stubborn.”

“I read enough,” he protested while gripping her behind and grinding his hardened length across his clothed center. “I wasn’t expecting it to be this intense though.”

“It will level off,” Y/N promised while kissing along his neck. “Just give it a minute. Before we go any further, Jinnie, I will need your verbal consent to any sexual activity that might happen. You’ll also need to choose a safe word and I need to know whether you want to use any protection.”

“I consent to anything you consent to, jagi,” Jin muttered as he groped along her thighs. “I think “grape” will be my safe word, if that’s ok with you. What do you mean “if” I want to use any protection?”

“Because of how thorough our companies are,” Y/N groaned as Jin cupped her breasts over her shirt. “We’re both tested and cleared regularly, and for the purposes of my employment here, the companies are giving us the option of forgoing protection, but it’s at your discretion, Jinnie. Just let me know what you would prefer.”

“What I would prefer,” Jin replied while grabbing on to her hips and ass. “Is for us to take this somewhere a little more private. We can always decide as the moment presents itself.”

The transaction buzzed plateaued and Jin regained some of his senses. He carefully pulled Y/N off the counter and reached over to grab the bowl of leftover chocolate sauce. Using kisses as bait, he led Y/N out of the kitchen and down the hall to his room. He didn’t want to wake up the whole house and give them another show, especially if he was planning a duet instead of a solo.

After closing and locking the door behind them, Jin started moving them towards the bed. When he leaned in to continue licking at the chocolate on her neck, Y/N glimpsed the overstuffed futon against the wall and made other plans. Catching him off guard, Y/N pushed Jin over to the futon and his knees buckled when his calves hit the edge of the futon.

Y/N pulled her blouse over her head and tossed it aside. Jin followed her lead and discarded his own shirt. After slipping out of her leggings, Y/N kneeled on the floor and started crawling over to him in just her pink floral bra and panties.

“Fuck, jagi,” he exclaimed, tilting his head in fascination. “How do you manage to get even hotter by the minute, huh?”

She shrugged her shoulders as she climbed up his thighs. Jin already had his jeans unbuttoned and unzipped, but he was too distracted to continue. Y/N ran her fingers up his lean torso and fanned them across his broad chest and shoulders. Jin exhaled in a shudder and leaned his head back against the wall. He opened his eyes in a flash when he felt something sticky being pressed into his chest.

“I have too many letters in my name,” Y/N stated cheekily. “This heart will have to do.”

Jin shifted his gaze down and watched Y/N’s fingers trace out the last line of the heart she was drawing in chocolate on his chest. His breath caught in his throat as she trailed the bottom of the heart to the top of his boxers.

“Oh dear,” Y/N pouted. “It seems I’ve forgotten how to draw a proper heart, querido. I guess I’ll have to try again. But first-“

Y/N dipped her head to lick a long strip of chocolate sauce from Jin’s body, starting with the line near the top of his boxers. Jin hissed at the contact and gripped the plush pillows on the futon as she continued licking and sucking chocolate sauce from his flawless skin.

“Son of a-“ Jin cursed. “That tongue of yours is fucking deadly.”

Y/N giggled and winked at him. He reached forward and pulled her into another hot and messy kiss. He pulled back for a moment and stroked her hair while he looked into her eyes, drowning in the dilated pupils lusting after him. Jin swallowed and hummed at the hint of chocolate flavor he’d gathered from her lips.

“Before we get completely lost in our passions, jagiya,” he murmured while nudging his nose along her jaw. “Teach me another word in Spanish. How do I say ‘my heart’?”

“Mi corazón,” Y/N articulated in a sigh. “You’ll have to roll another ‘r’ for this one.”

“Hmmmm,” Jin mused with a kiss to her nose. “There sure are a lot of rolling ‘r’ sounds in Spanish, mi corazón. Why is that?”

“Maybe we just like using our tongues?” Y/N responded. “I know I do.”

To prove her point, Y/N licked along the seam of Jin’s full lips and he eagerly accepted her invitation. With their tongues entwined and their hands seeking out exposed skin, Jin and Y/N picked up right where they left off. With her hands on Jin’s chest, Y/N started up the transaction once again and Jin groaned wantonly in response.

Quickly realizing they were both overdressed, Jin pushed his jeans and boxers down his hips. Y/N did her best to help him, almost falling back in the process. He clutched at her back and pulled Y/N into his lap, completely ignoring the sticky chocolate mess that was still clinging to her neck and his chest.

Dessert always was my favorite meal.

With a few kicks of his feet, his discarded bottoms were tossed aside and the only scraps of clothing separating them were Y/N’s bra and panties. Jin traced a finger along the straps of her bra and smirked at the pretty design. He tugged on the little pink bows adorning the front of the straps and shook his head.

“This is absolutely adorable on you, mi corazón,” praised Jin. “But I don’t think you’ll be needing it right now. I can offer you all the support you need.”

Y/N couldn’t resist giggling at his ridiculous words, and as she leaned her forehead against his, he unclasped her bra and let it slide down to the floor.Y/N started to get up to get her panties off as well, but Jin pulled her hips down in protest.

“Leave them on, jagi,” Jin commanded. “I want to ruin them while you wear them.”

A rosy flush spread across her cheeks and Jin smiled at the sudden appearance of color. Cupping her jaw with his hands, he pulled her back into his lips and the transaction increased in intensity as their passions pushed past the gates of self-control.

While she was distracted by his intoxicating kisses, Jin stealthily snuck his hand between them and started gently rubbing along the dampness pooled along the front of her panties. Y/N’s moans increased in pitch and she began rocking her hips in time with his fingers.

“Ah, ah, ah,” Jin tutted in disapproval while halting his fingers against her. “My pretty girl is being too greedy. She needs to let Daddy play on his own or else she’ll be punished.”

Y/N groaned and pulled away from him slightly. She couldn’t stop the pout from forming on her lips, and Jin smiled widely at her cute frustration.

“I am not going to call you Daddy, Seokjin-ah,” Y/N stated firmly. “I’ll give in to a lot of kinks, but a Daddy kink is not one I will entertain. That’s what I call my actual father.”

Jin popped an eyebrow at her and rolled his hips into her, drawing out a stilted whine from her throat. She gripped his shoulders and pushed back onto his hardened length. There was no denying her desire, but Jin still wanted a little more from her. He leaned in to kiss his way up her neck and licked and tugged at her earlobe with his teeth.

“What if you called me something else, princesa?” Jin offered. “What if you called me papi instead?”

Y/N’s eyes widened in shock and she huffed out an exhale in disbelief. She tried to pull back to protest, but her resolve withered as Jin continued to lave his tongue across her neck, making sure to suck away all of the leftover chocolate sauce.

“You can’t be serious, Jinnie,” she whined. “Why in the world would you want me to call you that of all things?”

“Let’s call it an unfulfilled fantasy, princesa,” Jin explained while still kissing every inch of skin he could reach. “You saw me dance to Latin music, you fed me Latin food, and you’ve been teasing me with your hot Latin words all night. Is it really so hard to believe that I want you to give me a little Latin love?”

“It’s so embarrassing though,” Y/N protested. “It makes me sound like one of those overly dramatic actresses in a bad telenovela.”

“I don’t know what that is, jagi,” Jin muttered while palming her breasts. “Please explain.”

“It’s like-” she gasped as Jin pulled a nipple in between his lips. “It’s like a cheesy Korean drama television show but Mexican. All the younger women call their lovers papi in those shows.”

“Then that’s what I want you to call me, jagiya,” Jin murmured against her breast. “Just for me and only when we’re alone behind closed doors. Can you be a good girl and do that for me?”

“I don’t think I-” she started to say, but soon released a high pitched squeak and Jin rolled one nipple between his fingers while sucking harshly on the other. “I guess you’ll have to find out, won’t you?”

Jin released her nipple and ran his tongue across it to soothe the pain he’d inflicted. If Y/N was issuing a challenge, he was more than willing to accept it.

In one swift motion, he pulled her lips in for a blazing kiss while dipping his fingers back down to her dripping center. His slender fingers nudged her panties aside so that he could run his fingers along her silky folds. Her initial moans were smothered by his kisses, but Jin was unable to contain her gasping yelp when he slipped two fingers inside of her.

“Ah!” she exclaimed while grinding onto his fingers. “Mmmm, that feels so good, Jinnie.”

“That’s not my name, princesa,” Jin cooed. “You know what I want to be called.”

Jin kept a steady rhythm going against her aching sex, but it wasn’t enough to reach her climax. He maintained the pressure against her clit and dipped into her folds occasionally to gather more lubrication, but he did nothing to further her impending orgasm. He kept her in a constant state of unfulfilled satisfaction.

“Jinnie,” Y/N whined. “Please, I need more.”

“I’ll give you everything you want and more,” Jin promised in a drawn-out purr. “You just have to give me what I want.”

He gently pistoned his fingers into her hot center, alternating between his middle and index finger. Y/N was still resisting so he decided to try a new tactic. He withdrew his fingers and licked up the arousal coating each digit.

Y/N was panting in frustration at Jin’s teasing. She was about to complain, but then she released a shuddery moan when she felt his blunt tip rubbing across her slick center.

“Oh, God yes,” she groaned. “Stop teasing me, querido, and put it in.”

“That’s the right language, mi corazón,” teased Jin. “But that isn’t the name I requested. I think I just decided something though. I don’t need any protection. Is that ok with you?”

Jin pushed the tip of his hardened shaft against her clit and hissed at the tingling sensation rippling down into his groin. The transaction was intensifying and Y/N was struggling to keep the connection stable. If this anticipation kept up any longer, there was no telling what could happen.

“Come on, baby,” Jin grunted, pushing tentatively at her entrance. “Just give me what I want.”

Y/N was teetering on the edge, writhing against Jin’s crotch, desperate for friction. She looked down into his smug face and lost complete control of her inhibitions.

“Please, papi,” she begged desperately. “I need you inside me, please give me your cock.”

“Of course, princesa,” Jin purred while clutching the small of her back. “Anything for my good girl.”

He slid his swollen tip past her dripping folds and she slowly sank further down his thick length, moaning at the burning stretch inch by inch. Once he bottomed out, they both groaned at the tight fit and took a few seconds to adjust to their new position. Y/N leaned her head against Jin’s shoulder and took a few gasping breaths. He stroked her back soothingly with one arm while gently rubbing at her clit with the other.

“Just breathe, jagiya,” Jin whispered. “Let me take care of my pretty girl. She’s being such a good girl for her papi.”

Fresh arousal squelched down his shaft as Y/N processed his words of praise. She whined against his shoulder when he started grinding into her weeping pussy. With her desire finally sated, the transaction began whirring back to life and spreading across Jin’s muscles. He groaned in response and tried his best not to thrust into Y/N too harshly. As the sensation tapered off to a strong buzz, she relaxed in his grasp and started to ride him in earnest. Each delicious bounce on Jin’s throbbing cock drew a deep lusty moan from her throat. He felt incredible inside of her, and there was no denying him any longer.

“Oh my-” Y/N croaked out. “You feel amazing, papi. I had no idea you’d feel this good inside me.”

Jin knocked his head back against the wall and gripped her hips as she continued to slam onto his dick. With a little swivel of her hips, she pulled the oddest noise from Jin’s mouth.

“Woah,” Jin moaned in ecstasy. “Woah, jagi, you’re so tight and - woah - so wet. If you keep on doing - woah - that thing with your hips, I’m not going to last - woah - much longer.”

Lost in her own passion, Y/N continued chasing her climax, rolling her hips at each descent into Jin’s lap. She ran her fingers over his shoulders and into his fluffy locks tugging on them slightly.

“Are you going to cum for me already, papi?” she purred seductively. “Are you going to fill your good girl with your hot sticky cum?”

“Not yet,” he gritted out. “I’m not going to cum until you do, mi corazón.”

With renewed focus, he reached up to pull on Y/N’s hair with one hand and he sucked on his index and middle fingers to get them slick and wet.

“Ok, jagiya,” Jin growled. “It’s time for you to scream for your papi like a good girl.”

Jin reached around her waist with his long arm and dipped his hand into the back of her panties. He began massaging his moistened fingers against her puckered back entrance in tight concentric circles. Y/N’s hips stuttered and she released a high pitch squeal as Jin’s fingers pressed further into her sweet spot while kissing along her neckline. Her hips rocked unsteadily in JIn’s lap as ravished her with his fingers, his lips, his tongue, and his glorious dick.

“Jinnie,” Y/N moaned loudly. “I’m, ah, I’m so close.”

“Then let your papi hear you,” he challenged. “I want to know who is making you feel this good.”

He began meeting her rocking hips with his own thrusts and matching the rhythm with his fingers as they dipped into her asshole with ease.  Y/N was overwhelmed by the sensations burgeoning throughout her system, and she couldn’t control the loud moans escaping from her lips. There was a knot of pleasure tightening in her nether region and she felt it reach the breaking point just as Jin bit down on her neck.

“Ah, papi, I’m cumming!” Y/N wailed as the knot snapped across her synapses in a flood of serotonin. “Cum with me, papi, cum with your good girl!”

Jin couldn’t hold back any longer, and he unleashed a harsh guttural groan as he filled her quivering pussy full of cum. They rode out their climaxes together and then collapsed into the futon as the high reached its apex and then ebbed away slowly in pulsating waves.

Y/N was breathing heavily on Jin’s shoulder, and he felt her clench tightly against him suddenly. Before he could ask if she was ok, she released the tension in a somewhat violent quake. The bubbling sensation from the transaction faded in a low hum before fizzling out in a tangible pop.

“Jagiya,” Jin whispered. “Are you okay?”

She took a deep breath and gently nodded into his shoulder in reassurance. She lifted herself from Jin’s lap and groaned at the soreness collecting in her thighs.

OK, maybe I should’ve waited until I was fully recovered. But how was I supposed to resist him?

Y/N stretched her arms above her head and let out an adorable squeaking noise. Jin chuckled at her catlike actions and noted the smudges of chocolate sauce on her breasts and tummy. He glanced down at his own chest and saw the remnants of Y/N’s earlier chocolate drawing still visible.

“Ah, princesa,” Jin sighed. “Look at how dirty we are, covered in chocolate and sweat and other naughty things. We need to clean up.”

“I agree,” replied Y/N. “What do you suggest?”

Jin stood up and lifted Y/N into his arms. She giggled as he planted kiss after kiss onto her face. As he carried her into the bathroom, Y/N took note of the large tub and walk-in glass shower and her eyes widened in awe.

How the heck did he get this amazing bathroom?!

After placing a towel on the counter, he sat Y/N down and grinned at her amazed expression. He gestured toward the other door in the room with the fluffy Koya robe hanging on a hook.

“Namjoon-ah and I actually share this bathroom,” Jin explained. “It’s the largest bathroom in the dorm, and two of us would have to share. Since Jungkookie got the larger room, we took the larger bathroom.”

“Seems fair,” Y/N mused while pulling off her hair tie. “So are we showering or bathing today, Jin-lindo?”

“I think the shower will be more effective,” he laughed. “We’re going to need that pressurized water to get all of this mess cleaned up, don’t you agree?”

Jin built up a pile of towels on the counter and pulled out two pale pink robes. He also reached into the closet and unwrapped a pair of RJ slippers and an RJ headband.

“Do you just have additional BT21 merchandise hidden in here in case of guests?” she joked. “I’ve seen so much merch around, but none of it has been in the original packaging until now.”

“Hey,” Jin objected. “I am proud of my creation and I will spread the love to everyone so they can love him as much as I do.”

“Ok, ok,” she laughed while hopping off the counter. “Will you be joining me in the shower?”

Jin stepped forward and kneeled in front of Y/N, his knees hitting the bathmat softly. He pulled her forward and kissed her thighs and hips. He hooked his fingertips into the band of her underwear and slid the ruined pink fabric to the floor. While Y/N was distracted by his kisses, he tossed the pair across the room into his closet, hoping she wouldn’t notice their absence later.

“Let me start the water so it can warm up, princesa,” Jin said while standing up. “Then we can get my pretty girl all cleaned up, yeah?”

Y/N smirked and nodded eagerly. She didn’t think she’d enjoy Jin’s adherence to his “Daddy” role, but she had to admit that it felt good to be taken care of so sweetly. Jin adjusted the spray of the nozzles and tested the temperature. When he was finally satisfied, he guided Y/N into the shower and pulled the glass door closed behind them.

“Come here, jagi,” Jin smirked. “Let your papi clean up his mess.”

He positioned Y/N in between the numerous nozzles and the warm water streamed across her hair and body. She leaned her head back into the flow and closed her eyes. Y/N was so engrossed in the enthralling warmth of the shower spray she didn’t notice that Jin had placed a thick mat on the floor in front of her and was kneeling once again. She jolted in surprise when his hands ran up her thighs and she opened her eyes to see his naked form worshipping at her feet.

Jin’s eyes were full of admiration as he traced the curves of her body and the rivulets of water dribbling down her skin. He pulled her forward just enough to keep the water on her back but also allow him some room to maneuver in between her legs.

“Hold on to my shoulders, mi corazón,” Jin suggested while placing her hands on his shoulders. “I have to clean up the mess I left here, ok? If you want, go ahead and start up another session while I get to work down here.”

Before he could offer any other information, he dragged his long pink tongue up her messy slit to collect the evidence of the combined orgasms from earlier. Y/N gasped out a surprised whine and started up another transaction as he dipped his tongue deeper into her creamy center. Jin didn’t waste any time as he licked and sucked every trace of arousal left behind. He swirled his tongue around her throbbing clit, and he pouted when he noticed she was even wetter than before.

“Oh man, jagi,” he tutted playfully. “I’m trying to clean up and you’re just getting dirty again. Why does my pretty girl insist on getting dirty when her papi is trying to make her nice and clean, hmm?”

He continued eating out her sopping wet pussy, feeding off of the arousal dripping out of her folds and from her mouth. The wanton moans and whimpers bouncing off of the shower walls were music to his ears, and he wanted to hear more of it. He placed one more lingering kiss to her aching clit and then stood up.

“Such a bad girl,” he mused. “I guess Papi will have to teach her a lesson about cleaning up her messes.”

Jin spun Y/N around and lifted her hands to the wall. He brought his hand down sharply to her right ass cheek and smirked as Y/N cried out from pleasure. He spanked her once more and then nudged her legs apart with his knee and reached up to cup her breasts from behind. With a little adjustment, he was able to slide his hand down to lift one of her legs and angle her sideways. From that position, he was able to slip back inside her dripping core, earning him a surprised moan from Y/N.

“Hold on,” Jin grunted. “Things are about to get very slippery in here, jagiya.”

He braced one hand on the wall between her two hands and started thrusting steadily into Y/N’s hot center while still holding her leg wrapped around his hip. The angle allowed for deeper penetration and Y/N was drowning in the sensation of Jin’s cock nudging her G-spot with each carefully timed thrust. Each drag across her spongy sex spot drew out a strangled moan and each kiss to her cervix pulled another whine and a then desperate plea from Y/N’s throat.

“Jinnie, papi,” Y/N whined. “I don’t know if I can come again. It’s too much already.”

“I know you can do it, pretty girl,” Jin encouraged. “Maybe you just need a little motivation?”

Jin lowered her leg and repositioned her against the glass wall of the shower. On the other side of the glass, Y/N saw her reflection in the large mirror positioned across the bathroom on the opposite wall. Before she had time to react, she felt Jin slide his fingertips to her swollen clit, stroking it gently in a repetitive pattern that seemed somewhat familiar. Even though she was sinking back into her lust-filled haze, the pattern clicked in her brain and she groaned and rolled her eyes.

“Are you seriously tracing your name out in Hangul on my clit, Jinnie?” she questioned. “Please tell me you’re not doing that.”

“What?” Jin scoffed indignantly. “Any chance I get, I’m going to let you know who’s making you feel this good. Now, let’s see if we can get one more orgasm out of you, princesa.”

Jin shifted behind her and managed to slip back inside her vagina with little resistance. He continued to play with her clit as he started grinding in and out, attempting to rile her orgasm back to its breaking point once again. The increase in stimulation started pooling in Y/N’s abdomen, but what really contributed to her impending climax was the reflection she was staring at across the room.

Her breasts were pressed against the glass and droplets of water traveled down the large pane from her drenched form. With each push forward from Jin, Y/N’s face contorted in ecstasy and her hands splayed out into slick starfish formations. She could see Jin’s face behind her as he picked up the tempo of his ministrations and the look on his face was the epitome of sex and power. His plump lips were pursed in concentration, his eyes were hazy and focused on the task at hand, and his jaw clenched with each push of his hips into Y/N. He had her exactly where he wanted her and he wasn’t letting go until she fell apart by his hands one more time.

Taking a page out of her own book, Jin started to add a slight twist to his hip movements and that pulled a different kind of moan from her throat. It was higher in pitch and volume, so Jin knew he had hit the jackpot. He increased his speed and leaned forward to coach her to the finish line.

“That’s it, jagi,” he praised. “You’re being such a good girl for your papi right now. Just listen to those beautiful sounds coming out of your filthy mouth. Say it, mi corazón, who is making you feel this good, hmm?”

“You are, papi,” she nearly screamed. “Ah, so good, so fucking good! Please don’t stop!”

“I have no intention of stopping, pretty girl,” Jin assured her. “Not until I’ve pulled every last drop of cum out of this magnificent pussy you have. Let go, jagiya, cum one more time for your papi.”

As much as her body was resisting, her mind was suddenly flooded with sensory overload and she felt something rapidly build in her abdomen and it hurtled past the finish line with a sensual howl. Jin’s eyes nearly bulged out of his head when he looked down and realized that Y/N was squirting across their legs and all over the shower floor.

“Holy shit,” he exclaimed. “Y/N-ah, I think I may have overdone it a bit. I didn’t mean to make you squirt, jagi.”

Y/N braced herself against the glass and huffed out a shaky exhale. She was almost ready to collapse from exhaustion. That last orgasm drained what little energy she’d managed to reserve from the previous day’s activities. She was going to need another day to recover from this. She abruptly hissed when another lick of pain intruded on her thoughts and pierced into her temples. These were happening more frequently and it was likely a result of her lack of rest. She needed to allow her brain time to process and properly store the acquired information away according to transaction protocol.

Tomorrow is all about rest and recovery. I’m probably just pushing myself too hard.

She was too lost in her thoughts to notice that Jin had pulled out and regrouped in the shower. He gently wrapped his arms around her waist and led her back to the nozzle streams.

“Shhh, it’s ok, jagiya,” he soothed. “Let me take care of you. You did so well for me.”

Y/N hummed her acquiescence to Jin and he carefully held her in place while shampooing her hair, applying a special conditioner, and then scrubbing her clean with sweet-smelling body wash in a soft loofah.  Once she was all cleaned up, he turned off the water and walked her onto the large bath mat just outside the shower entrance. Once she was toweled dry and wrapped up in the pale pink bathrobe, he placed the RJ slippers on her feet, wrapped the towel around her damp hair, and sat her down in the chair in front of the shared vanity table.

“Stay here for a moment, princesa,” Jin gently requested. “I’m going to take a quick shower and then I’ll help you with your hair and stuff, yeah?”

All Y/N could do was give him a lazy thumbs up as she leaned her head against the side of the plushy high backed chair. She heard the shower turn back on and was comforted by the water falling on the shower floor. She was on the verge of falling asleep when she felt Jin unwrap her hair from the towel. He ran some type of product through her hair and then carefully combed the tangles from it. Y/N heard a blow dryer turn on behind her and then what felt like a diffuser was being used to dry her hair. Once her hair was dry, Jin used the RJ headband to hold her hair out of her face and then helped her stand up.

“Come on, pretty girl,” Jin proclaimed. “I think we played enough for one day. Let’s get you to bed. Do you want to stay here or go back to your room?”

Y/N groaned at the thought of walking all the way back to her room. Jin’s bed looked so inviting and she was just so tired. She couldn’t even fathom making it to the bedroom door, let alone all the way down the other hallway to her own bed.

“M’tired, Jin-Jin,” Y/N murmured sleepily against his shoulder. “Can I just stay here with you?”

“Of course, jagiya,” Jin exclaimed. “Whatever you want, sweetheart. Here, let me get you something to sleep in and then I can help you on the bed.”

Jin removed the robe from her shoulders and dressed Y/N in an oversized RJ T-shirt. He helped settle her beneath the billowing duvet and surrounded her with some of his pillows. She whispered out something that vaguely sounded like a “thank you,” but Jin couldn’t make it out. Within a few seconds, she was breathing softly and sinking into a deep resonating sleep.

Jin, in the meantime, was rocking a serious high from the after-effects of the series of transactions in which he’d participated. As involved and intense as they’d been, what was gnawing at him the most was the sudden craving he felt for Y/N.

Her touch, her smile, her laugh, her everything…

Jin continued to stare at the sleeping beauty on his bed and he felt his mind scrambling beyond repair. He was only supposed to be in this for the sake of his best friend and, literally, nothing else. He pursed his lips and furrowed his brow in frustration but couldn’t figure out where to direct his growing apprehension.

He checked the RJ clock on his bedside table and he saw that it was almost midnight. Everyone in the dorm was likely holed up in their rooms already, so there wasn’t anyone he could talk to about any of this. Jin huffed out an annoyed exhale and went back into the bathroom to continue his nighttime skin and hair regiment. Once that was complete, he pulled on his RJ pajamas and looked back at his bed.

Jin wasn’t ready for sleep right now. He needed to clear his head and he wasn’t going to get any rest until that happened. He quietly walked out of his room and into his own personal sanctuary: the kitchen. He eyed the counter where he’d decorated Y/N’s neck in chocolate, the stove where she’d cooked them an amazing dinner, the container of churros she’d made for Namjoon. All of it crashed onto Jin’s frazzled nerves and made him twitch uncomfortably.

This isn’t about me. It’s about Namjoon-ah. How dare I overlook our one true goal?

There was only one way to remedy the guilt that was building and collecting in his broad shoulders at each passing moment. He needed to apologize for his selfishness and reaffirm his dedication to his best friend and brother.

He needed to speak to Namjoon.

With a renewed determination for a clear conscience and a burning desire to see his beloved leader, Jin packed up the meal complete with condiments and dessert made earlier for Namjoon. He didn’t have time to wait for Namjoon’s sister to pick all of this up. He needed to take it to the hospital himself right now.

JIn quickly slipped back into his room and changed into a T-shirt and grey sweatpants. Once he had his shoes and pink hoodie on, he grabbed his car keys and the fully-loaded food bag. No one heard the alarm disengage as he entered the garage and they definitely didn’t notice the sound of a car backing down the driveway and speeding off into the cool Seoul night.

Previous Chapter - Next Chapter

PERIPHERAL MASTERLIST

@caught-in-a-seesaw-stigma​‘s MASTERLIST

[euphoria-vmin7]

Heartworm | pjm

pairing: park jimin x reader

genre/warnings: childhood friends to lovers, angst (I can’t write anything else), fluff, a shit ton of cliches, non idol! au, TOO MANY FEELZ, um does black-haired jimin count as a warning? THIS IS SOME REAL DRAMATIC SHIT

words: 26,141 (omg u need to calm tf doWN REY)

--summary: maybe you shouldn’t have believed that friendships lasted forever. after all, people change and grow before choosing a path. but maybe fate can pull a few more strings for you. especially after you realize that a certain friend means more to you than you first thought.

a/n: i dont know what to say lol....idek what this is anymore. I started this at the end of september. SEPTEMBER. I wanted to publish this for his birthday but I’m a slow ass writer. plus i didn’t expect it to get this long. i just kept writing and writing and came up with this MESS soooooo.....happy jimin day?

Heartworm

heart·worm

n. a relationship or friendship that you can’t get out of your head, which you thought had faded long ago but is still somehow alive and unfinished. 

***

At five years old, you hurt someone for the first time. 

But you are only five years old so you aren't as strong as you think you are. You fully intend on being intimidating, but all that comes across is a whine as you shove the chest of the boy in front of you.

You had been minding your own business, enjoying your time on the playground during your regularly scheduled recess time at preschool. You were trying your absolute hardest to use strands of grass to spell out your name on the pavement. Your tiny fingers would reach over to the patch of grass next to you and pluck out a piece before laying it gently to form the letters. A small smile played on your face and your tongue occasionally peeked past your lips in concentration. 

You felt so at ease, just as any other five year old would have felt. A light breeze blew through your short hair and the sun was high up in the sky, making it easy for you to see your own shadow crouched over the art you were creating. 

You had just gotten to the last letter when things had to go wrong. 

A soccer ball came whirling down and hit the pavement in front of you with a loud smack. The force of its impact scattered the grass you had placed on the ground and it bounced away. 

You look down at the now meaningless pieces and utter disappointment blossoms your chest. Unknowingly, your eyes began to fill with tears. You stand up with tiny fists curled at your sides, looking around for the culprit. The horrible meanie head that decided to ruin your art. 

"I got it!!" you hear someone yell and a boy bounds past you. You watch him go pick up the ball and begin walking back to his friends and anger flares in your chest. 

"HEY!" 

The boy looks at you in surprise. 

"You meanie!"

"What?" he asks in confusion. You take a good look at him. He was basically your height, with fair skin and crescent shaped eyes. He had chubby cheeks and plump lips that were curved into an awkward frown. You curl your lip in distaste. 

"You messed up my drawing!!" you yell angrily, stomping your foot on the ground. He blinked. 

"W-What drawing?" he asks, now holding the ball under his arm. 

You dramatically point at the ground where your scattered grass lay and the boy squinted. He could briefly make out the remnants of some letter of the alphabet and he turned back to you. 

"Oh sorry," he smiles sheepishly. But you weren't having it. 

"That took me a bajillion hours!! You bad poopy head!!" 

He gasps at the horrid insult. 

"I am not a poopy head!!" he yells back. 

"You are!!" 

"No I'm not!!" 

"You are!!" 

"I'm not!!" he says back, now glaring at you with a childish hand on his hip. "And your drawing is so ugly!" 

You gasp, slapping a hand over your heart as though he had physically hurt you. 

"You-!" you spluttered over your words, the anger now taking over. "You are a poopy head!!"

You step forward, placing your stubby hands on his chest and shoving him hard. The boy yelped as he lost balance, stumbling back a few steps before landing on his butt. 

His head whipped up, brows furrowed in an angry frown. 

“WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?! YOU’RE SUCH A BABY!!” he yelled. 

Your anger fizzled out and was instead replaced by sadness and disappointment. The fact that your grass artwork was destroyed and the way this boy was yelling at you made your lip shake. More tears started pooling in your eyes. 

“Y-You’re a bad p-people!” you whimpered pathetically, raising your chubby fists to your cheeks where tears started trailing down. The boy stood up, a frown still on his face as up picked up the ball that had slipped out of his grasp when he had fallen over. 

You, having dramatic tendencies like any five year old, started crying for real, putting your face in your palms. You heard some shuffling. 

“H-Hey now,” a small voice muttered. “Please don’t cry. I’m sorry for being a poopy head. Your drawing was not ugly,” 

You raised your head slightly, your tears halting too quickly. 

“R-Really?” you sniffled. 

He smiled widely, showing off pearly white teeth with a few gaps in between. He nodded eagerly. 

“Yup!” he chirped. “The ball fell on it while we were playing. Sorry!” 

Your tears halted completely and you too beamed at him. 

“It’s okay! Wanna be friends with me??” 

“Yeah!!” he said excitedly. 

“I’m (Name)! (Last Name) (Name)!!” you smiled. “I’m five!!” 

“Ooh I’m six! And my name is Park Jimin!! Now we’re friends!!” 

***

At seven years old, you have your first crush. 

He is seven, like you, and he’s in your class. When your teacher lines up your second grade class, you hurry to stand behind him, blushing heavily and twirling your short hair around your pointer finger. 

“Jinwoo, why don’t you come solve the problem on the board?” your teacher asks sweetly and you beam as the cute boy stands up from his seat and walks up to the board. 

112 +17 = 129

His handwriting was pretty. (Though what would you know? You were still seven; even scribbles would be considered pretty to you). 

The teacher nods with a satisfied smile and Jinwoo grins proudly, making you blush from the back of the classroom. 

“Alright, that’s enough of math. Why don’t we go outside to see our butterflies for science today?” 

So, you eagerly trip over your pink sneakers and run to stand behind Jinwoo. He turns to look at you and grins at you and you turn away obviously, smiling just a bit. 

Your class, lined up neatly, begins walking through the hallways to go outside. You could count the stripes on Jinwoo’s shirt and see the slight sheen of golden in his straight brown hair. 

“We’re passing the third graders. Everyone stick to the left side!” 

You briefly tear your eyes away from Jinwoo and look to the line of slightly taller kids walking past your class. 

You catch a familiar gaze and grin. 

Park Jimin walks past you, his eyes crinkling into crescents at the sight of you. 

“Hi (Name),” he whispers as he passes. 

“Hi Jiminie,” you giggle. And then he is out of sight. 

You enjoy your time outside with the butterflies, feeling fluttery when Jinwoo laughs at them or falls into the grass along with his friends. 

Your happiness stays with you throughout recess. As you crouch down, dragging a piece of chalk across the pavement, a pair of blue sneakers run up to you. 

“Whatcha drawing?” a voice asks. You peek up and smile at Jimin. 

“A butterfly! Is it pretty, Jimin?” 

Jimin nods quickly, plopping down on the pavement. 

“Ew, Jiminie! Don’t sit on the floor! It’s dirty! You’re gonna catch germs!” you warn him, crinkling your nose in disgust. He grins toothily. 

“No I won’t!” 

But you don’t really pay attention to him. Instead, your eyes stray to where Jinwoo is kicking a soccer ball around with his friends. 

“Who ya looking at?” Jimin squints to catch the interesting sight. You don’t move and he realizes that you are indeed staring at one of those boys. 

“Why are you looking at them?” 

You look up at him with wide eyes. Your seven year old mind is racing. 

“Jiminie, you’re my bestest friend. So I’m gonna trust you and tell you a really really really big secret!” 

Jimin leans closer to you, voice quieting to a whisper. 

“What secret?” 

“You know Kim Jinwoo?” you ask him. 

“The one in your class?” Jimin inquires. You nod. “What about him?” 

“I think I….” you take a dramatic breath. “I think I love him,” 

Jimin’s hands fly to his mouth and his brows shoot up. 

“No way!! That guy?” 

You nod seriously. 

“I dreamt about marrying him,” 

Jimin’s jaws remain agape as he takes in this juicy piece of gossip. 

“Oh no! (Name), I think we’re too little to get married,” he sighs. 

“Whatever,” you dismiss. “I know I love Jinwoo and I’m going to marry him. And at my wedding, you’ll be my best man!” 

He laughs. 

“Isn’t the best man for the boy?” 

You blink before resuming your tracing on the ground. 

“Oh? Then I guess you can be my bridesmaid!” 

***

At 12 years old, it suddenly hurts to go to school. 

Perhaps it is the total disregard you had for your own image. 

Up until now, it seemed that nobody really cared about others. People were just friends no matter how one looked or dressed. 

But when you turned 12 and entered the seventh grade, everyone began to discuss being pretty and discuss cute boys and discuss who was taking who to the winter dance. 

You didn’t know it would be this way. 

So you didn’t take any care of your body image. Throughout the summer you had eaten to your heart’s content and leisurely watched as much television as you liked. Naturally, you put on a bit of weight. But you didn't necessarily know that once you turned 12 people would suddenly start expecting you to be skinny. And soon enough as the year went on, you started feeling a little bit worse whenever you looked at yourself in the mirror. You stopped wearing form-fitting clothes and instead drowned your body in bland oversized sweatshirts. Watching the girls who had the body totally pull off clothes you only aspired to wear made going to school feel like a liability. 

You push every tray of school pizza away from you despite the grumbling of your starved stomach. Looking down at it, it seemed so appetizing even with its grease, especially since you had skipped breakfast too. But one glance at the chubbiness of your thighs made you push it away without a second thought. 

That's how you had been getting by anyway. Until that day. 

A sharp smack to your shoulder made you wince. 

You quickly whipped around to see a familiar disapproving frown. 

"What the hell, (Name)?"

"What?" 

"Why aren't you eating, huh?" 

You blinked as guilt arose in your chest. Jimin's frown deepens and he quickly sits next to you. He reaches for the tray and pulls it in front of you before looking at you expectantly. 

"I don't feel like eating, Jiminie,"

He sighs. 

"Don't lie to me. You're obviously starving. Why won't you eat?" 

"Don't worry about it," you mutter, turning away from him. 

"HEY JIMIN!! C'MERE!!" a few boys were yelling from across the cafeteria. 

"You should go," you urge, nudging his elbow gently in the direction of his eighth grade friends.

“Not until you put some food in your mouth. And that doesn’t meet spit it out later!!” he scolds, crossing his arms. You pout, but do as he says. After all, you knew more than anyone, how stubborn Jimin could be. 

He smiles a bit in approval. Though his attention tears from you at the yells from his friends. 

“I gotta go. See you later, (Name)!” 

By the end of the year, you were eating meals regularly. 

***

At 15 years old, your friendships change. 

Your second year in high school had been nothing short of hell. Schoolwork had become more tedious and managing your social life became a chore. You could only wish to be one of those kids who had it all. The brains, beauty, and just the fact that everyone wanted to be around you. Unfortunately you were just average. There was nothing special about you. You could go a whole day without being at school and nobody would notice you were gone, save for the few friends you’ve acquainted over the years. You couldn’t help but keep wishing you had been likeable. 

You had been watching your friends acquire dates for school dances and bail out on hanging out with you to hang out with their significant others. But it wasn’t that big of a deal because you are still only 15 years old. 

But you also lack a close friendship. You lack a person to go to whenever you really need to rant or to cry or to laugh. 

You thought you had that, but you didn’t. 

You thought you had that in Park Jimin, but you didn’t. 

Oh, Jimin. 

The Jimin you had met in preschool had left. The Jimin you were friends with in the second grade had changed. The Jimin you knew in the seventh grade had disappeared. 

And instead in his place was this Jimin. 

This Jimin, the 16 year old Jimin, the Jimin in the junior year, wasn’t your Jimin. 

Your eyes couldn’t help but be drawn to him. This new Jimin. Just like everyone else couldn’t help but keep their eyes on him. Obviously, for he had definitely changed. 

In looks, maybe not so much. He still had the slight chubbiness to his cheeks, the same crooked front teeth, the same straight black hair, the same kind crescent shaped eyes. But he wasn’t as shy as he was as a second grader. Instead he now caught the attention of everyone around him. He was intelligent and charming. 

So naturally, he garnered positive attention. He had been his year’s class president since he was a freshman. He was one of the star members of the school Dance Team. He had won regional competitions all over Busan. He was dating Kim So Jung, one of the prettiest and most popular girls in the eleventh grade. And no, she is not one of the rude girls, but rather she is sweet and kind and intelligent. He has the best grades and plays on the Boy’s Soccer Team and he is just perfect. 

Everyone loves him. Everyone wants to be around him. 

And you are gradually forgotten. It breaks your heart. It really does. It breaks your heart that the only interaction you have with him now is an awkward smile in the halls as you pass. It breaks your heart that there are never any text messages from him, let alone calls. It breaks your heart that you cannot go to him when you need him most. 

He is not the same. Neither are you. 

He just isn’t the Jimin that you once knew. And that’s fine. People change; you know that. You cannot blame him for anything. It is not his fault. He isn’t a bad person or anything. He just has other interests and better friends. He is also older than you. Why would he prefer to spend time with a younger kid than people of his own age? 

You accept this. You decide that it is good for the both of you. It’s time you became a bit more social and enjoy yourself to the best of your ability. 

It is your sophomore year of high school that you make an important friendship. You know this friendship will last a long time. 

Your closest friend becomes Hirai Momo. She has just moved to your school and she is nothing short of a sweetheart. She is pretty and kind and loving and smart. And she is the greatest friend you could have asked for. 

You tell her everything about yourself as does she. And you are happy. Halfway through the year both of you meet Lee Jihoon. And he easily joins your little circle and you become an inseparable trio. 

Everything goes just fine, until you are assigned partners for writing a story in your Journalism class. This class, an elective, was open to all grades, and just to your luck, you got assigned to none other than Park Jimin. 

A part of you was relieved. You knew it could have been a lot worse. You could have ended up with someone you didn’t know at all. Or even worse, someone who was unkind or like a bully. 

But you got assigned to your friend. So that made you happy. 

But another part of you was slightly nervous. It had been a substantial amount of time since the two of you had spoken, and you wanted to avoid the inevitable awkwardness. But nonetheless, when you hear his name, you can’t help but smile. 

That smile faltered when you looked to Jimin. His friends were looking at him with a look of pity mixed with humor. As though they felt bad for him but also wanted to make fun of him. 

“Sorry man,” you heard one of the seniors  - Ha Sungwoon, you think his name is - mutter with a slightly sympathetic smirk. The way Jimin responds makes you almost gasp. 

“This is gonna suck,” he mutters. 

So does this mean...he is ashamed to be your partner? Or perhaps annoyed? Upset? Angry? 

Whatever the reason is, it doesn’t seem good. So when it is time for you to join him, you approach him feeling nervous, upset, and scared. 

He doesn’t say much, only a quiet “Hey,” as you take a seat. You both briefly discuss how you both will split the workload and start the project. It is quiet between you two, and you hate the fusion of tension and awkwardness in the air. You decide to be brave. You decide to be the one who tries. 

“H-How have you been?” you ask, looking up from your work to him. He doesn’t raise his head. 

“Fine,” he replies, short and quick. There is no how about you or thanks for asking. 

It is just fine. 

You are not stupid. You can understand disinterest when you see it. So you shut your mouth and continue working for the rest of class, your heart mourning the loss of a friend. 

He just packs up and leaves with his friends at the end of class, despite the two of you not finishing your work. You know that the two of you still have to discuss how you will finish. So once again you try to be brave. 

After school as you walk home with Jihoon, you whip your phone out to text Jimin. You notice that it takes a lot of time to scroll all the way down to his contact and that makes you sad. Regardless, as you find his name you type up the most formal text message you can manage, stating exactly what work you will do and what he can do and you hesitate, but click send anyway. 

You only care about your grades. Not about your partner. 

You watch the screen for a few minutes, slightly droning out Jihoon’s rambling about the girl in math class who had confessed to him earlier in the day, and await a response. 

It doesn’t come though, and your mood drops even further into a dark pit as you tuck your phone away. 

You walk with Jihoon to his doorstep, waving to his mother and politely declining her offer of snacks and head home. 

You feel weird. It was like a part of you was missing. 

Although you understood that deep inside you knew that Jimin was not going to be the same. Deep inside you had already realized that you both had drifted too far. You both had changed too much and now you knew that you would never be the same again. 

That didn’t stop it from really hurting though. 

You tried to distract yourself from thinking about him by starting up the pile of homework you had. You were sure that as you progressed into the later years of high school it would be a lot worse, but you were already so stressed. 

A couple of hours later, when you had finished graphing the last parabola, you decided to move onto Journalism. Knowing very well that you and Jimin had to work on this together, you decided to kill your suspense and check whether there had been a response from him. Turning on your phone, the home screen didn’t show any new notifications and your heart sunk. You opened up your messages and scrolled to Jimin’s name, just to check if it sent or not. Just in case. 

You wish you didn’t, because then you wouldn’t have found out the Jimin had left you on read. 

To any other person, it wouldn’t seem like much. But to you, it meant a lot. Because four years ago the two of you had promised to never leave each other on read. 

Ever. 

And sure it might have been some stupid 11 year old promise but the two of you stuck to that rule for the longest time. 

Well, I guess not anymore. 

You had lost him now. It was confirmed. Park Jimin was no longer your best friend.

In fact, he wasn’t even your friend anymore. 

You were nobody to him. 

And unfortunately, that made you cry. You cried and cried. 

People who don’t go through it wouldn’t understand the feeling. They’ll shrug it off, saying that it’s just a stupid friend. You’d find more friends, it’s not a big deal. 

But it was a big deal. 

He was your first best friend and you thought he always would be. 

Guess not. 

Your mother came home and immediately panicked seeing you in your state of tears. 

She ran to you and began to demand what was wrong and so you told her. You told her about how high school was rough and you had so much work and that you just lost Jimin and didn’t even understand why. 

“Oh honey,” she sighed with sympathy in her eyes as she rubbed your back. “I’m so sorry. I know you really cared about Jimin. I can’t believe he isn’t your friend anymore. It’s so sad,” 

You could only sniffle and nod. 

“I know it’ll take some time to get used to it, (Name). But don’t let it bring you down. You have Momo and Jihoon, right? They’re true friends,” 

She was right. 

“It might seem like it’s bad now, but you will get over it. Sometimes things don’t work out. Especially friendships,” 

***

At 17 years old, you think you are in love for the first time. He is sweet and kind and always laughing. He has a beautiful smile that lights up the room and eyes that express the happiness he always seems to feel. He is your age, with short brown hair and honey-like brown eyes. 

His name is Choi Youngjae and you can’t help but like him. 

He isn’t very popular but has a substantial amount of friends and you know that he treasures them. 

So you spend the first few months of your last year before college blushing like a schoolgirl, as embarrassing as that sounds. It can’t be helped though. 

You’ve fallen, and fallen hard. 

Jihoon thinks you are ridiculous, as he remarks almost everyday. And Momo laughs and teases you at every opportunity. You don’t mind though. In fact it makes you very happy. Because you can tell that you will have those two for the rest of your life. 

The weeks go on and all you can do is pine from afar. You like being able to do so; it reduces the stress of a confession or the likes of it. Even though a part of you is wishing to be able to date him and let him take you to the prom. But you have come to terms that it will most likely never happen and that the universe doesn't play favorites. 

But that doesn't deter your mood. With such good friends and a sweetheart for a crush you don't have much to worry about. 

Especially since you don't have to worry about seeing Park Jimin in the hallways. You don't have to worry about texting him for a Journalism project. 

Nope. None of it. 

Because Jimin had graduated last year and was probably having the time of his life in college. But you didn't want to spend time plaguing your thoughts with him. 

So instead you tried focusing on your teacher. But that didn't happen either because you were distracted once again by the familiar head of floppy light brown hair.As she assigned the next task for the class, you stood up to go sit with Jihoon as partners. 

"Okay you do these four problems and I'll do these ones," he said, pulling out his notebook and beginning to label the problems. 

You nodded half-heartedly as you begin working on the problems. 

A loud laugh cut off your train of thought and you couldn't help but smile. You knew that laugh. 

Risking a peek, you saw Youngjae laughing his ass off at something his friends had said. The same way he always did. Jihoon grinned at you knowing fully well what was on your mind. 

"Shut up," you muttered, though it was hardly serious considering the smile on your face. 

He snorted and continued working while you continued sneaking glances at your unrequited crush. 

Though, you didn't expect to be noticed. 

You almost have a seizure when Youngjae’s pretty brown eyes meet yours from across the classroom. You physically choke and began hacking and Jihoon clicks his tongue and begins smacking your back. How embarrassing. 

Though when you sneakily glance back up, Youngjae is shyly grinning at you. 

You look away to hide your smile. 

***

At 18 years old, you have your first break up. It is one month before you turn 19 and one month before you officially start college. It is nerve-wracking but also relieving because you have survived the hell known as high school. 

But that means letting go of some important people in the process. You know it’s not forever; in fact there are many methods for you to stay in touch with them. But it is sad because you know you won’t get to see them everyday like you used to. 

Your bedroom is clean, neat, and slightly bare as you survey it. Your closet is mostly empty as you have packed a majority of your clothes and transferred it to Seoul where your university is. Your father comes in and gently places a hand on your shoulder. He offers you a slightly melancholic smile and you are already missing him. 

“Ready to go?” he asks you and you nod with a soft smile, reaching up to hug him. He releases you and smiles once again before making his way out of his room. Your sister, who is going to be a freshman now, is helping your mom pack some homemade food for you, knowing very well that you will miss it. 

You take another glance around and think of all the times you’ve had in this very bedroom. 

You can remember Momo and a few other girls sitting on your bed and applying makeup for each other on the night of the senior prom. You can remember Jihoon laying on the floor with you under a horde of blankets as you watched scary movies on your computer with the lights off. You can remember playing dolls with your eight year old sister. You can remember your dad lifting you up and running around to make you feel as though you were flying. You can remember your mother gently lulling you to sleep as she read the lines of some fairytale. 

And sadly, you can remember all ages of Park Jimin playing in your bedroom. You see the six year old Jimin giggling with you when both of you are covered in mud. You see the eight year old Jimin teaching you how to dance, his chubby fingers linked with yours as he twists you around the room. You see the 13 year old Jimin sitting on your bed, a soft frown on his face as he looks down at you. His arm is securely wrapped around your shoulders and you are crying because you think you are too fat, too ugly. 

And then, 13 year old Jimin disappears into a wisp of smoke and you only then realize that you are silently crying. It is hard not to miss everything that has happened. 

You meet your roommate. She is a sweet and pretty girl named Sana Minatozaki and she is in your year. She has moved from Osaka to study in Seoul and you both decide to help each other out. 

As soon as you’re settled in, you call Momo to find out how she is doing. She is going to university in Japan, and you miss her a lot. She is still the same as always when you speak with her. You catch up, telling each other about leaving home and how the dorms were and what your campus was like. 

In the midst of the call, you add Jihoon, who is studying classical music, and talk with both of them for hours. 

A slightly sour topic is brought up. 

“Hey...how are you doing? You know…? After the…..” Momo cannot bring herself to continue, but you know what she means. It’s sweet, how much she cares for you. 

“I’m fine,” you dismiss with a wave of your hand.

“Are you sure?” Jihoon asks. “I know Youngjae meant a lot to you,” 

Ah, Youngjae. 

The first person you had ever loved. And the first boyfriend you had ever had. 

The first part of your senior year of high school was spent in dejected thoughts of an unrequited crush. But unbeknownst to you, fate was sometimes on your side. 

Well, fate had given you Youngjae, anyway. 

You didn’t see it happening. You always thought your feelings would go unnoticed. 

But it turned out that Youngjae had returned your feelings which made you the happiest a girl could be. That one day, after his friends Yugyeom and Bambam had gleefully shoved him up to you and he had shyly asked you out was one of the best days of your life. Starting then, he was yours throughout the year. 

He had been the perfect definition of a boyfriend. He had taken you on dates, helped you with homework, even took you to prom. But on your side, guilt started gnawing at your insides. As the year went on, you started feeling as though it was slightly forced. You loved Youngjae, you really did. But you didn’t feel like he was the sole reason that your life was happy and you almost felt as though you were pushing yourself through this relationship. 

It wasn’t his fault; he was nothing but a sweetheart and you loved him for everything he did. But maybe it was because you knew from early on that your relationship was going to come to an end. Youngjae wanted to go to school for Theatre and Film and you were looking into Journalism and Writing. And though both of you were planning on studying in Seoul, it still felt as though you were both traveling down separate paths. 

So, the breakup was tough. 

It had broken your heart, since you had been so in love with him for almost two years, but you knew it was for the best. Your relationship would just be too much to handle. You were both applying to different schools, had different interests, and wanted different things out of life. Besides, you wanted to first get used to college before you could maintain a steady relationship. 

You both dragged out the time leading up to the impending breakup for as long as you could. You spent the summer before college basking in each other’s company and giggling about memories that only stupid high school kids could make. It felt nice, and you suddenly remembered why you were so in love with him. 

By God, Choi Youngjae is perfect. 

But to both of you, college meant a fresh start. 

So you promised that it wasn’t goodbye. If your feelings still stayed, then maybe the future would bring you both back to each other.

Despite it all, you cry when you get home. It is a weird feeling in your chest, as though you have lost something that wasn’t quite yours. It is a nostalgic feeling, lingering somewhere in the recesses of your past subconscious, linked to someone who seems all too familiar. 

But it is kind of easy to let him go. 

That tells you one thing: 

It wasn’t really love. 

***

You celebrate your 19th birthday after 3 weeks of college. Sana, who has already become like your sister, takes you out to a restaurant that is just outside of campus. You have a lot of fun with her. She clutches her stomach as she laughs while you animatedly recall the most recent experience in your Literature class and grin at her obvious amusement. You shovel some grilled chicken into your mouth as she speaks to you. 

It is one of your best birthdays just because you feel at ease in the best way possible. Sure, there are countless assignments still waiting for you at home and you've skipped your part time job to come out tonight, but it's your birthday, and you deserve to enjoy yourself. 

The first thing that interrupts your night is loud laughter. 

Sana turns around to look at the door as a group of guys flood into the restaurant, talking loudly with one another. She turns back to you and starts up the conversation once again, ignoring the group of chattering males that take a seat in the booth by the window. You do the same, continuing with the chicken in front of you. 

"Well fuck Taehyung, I can't believe you did that!!" one of them yells in disbelief, though you can hear the grin in his voice. The voice sounds familiar, and you quickly glance to the side to see Ha Sungwoon from your high school. 

"Oh jeez," you mutter. Sana raises a brow. 

"What?" 

"I know that guy," you sigh. It's not like you had anything against Sungwoon; you had never really spoken to him. But he was his friend. 

"Which one?"

"The one in the red shirt," 

"Ah," 

You manage to drone them out and giggle as Sana talks badly about one of her professors. 

"Where is your boyfriend, Tae?" 

You look to see who is being addressed and almost spit out your drink. Because someone that attractive should not be allowed to exist. 

He has light brown hair that is parted down the side and a dark headband is wrapped around his temple, exposing his forehead. His skin is golden tan and he has dark brown eyes. His smile is the killer though; it is rectangular and you’re sure he’s charmed a million people with that smile before. 

“Shut up, hyung,” the guy mutters with a playful roll of his eyes and in the deepest voice you had ever heard in your life. “He’s my best friend, not my boyfriend. I’m straight,” 

The other man grins in response. 

“He’s probably still at the studio. You know how the idiot is about dancing,” ‘Tae’ sighs, whipping out his phone to presumably text the person in question. 

“Yup, he’s been like that for as long as I’ve known him,” Sungwoon comments. ‘Tae’ smiles softly. You turn away to look at Sana and she questions your expression. 

“People that attractive shouldn’t exist,” you mutter, jerking your head to the side. Sana laughs. 

“What, you mean Kim Taehyung?” 

“Is that his name?” you ask, genuinely curious. She nods. 

“He’s in my Filmmaking class and a second year. Really popular,” 

“I can tell. He’s way too good-looking for anyone to ignore him,” She agrees with you. “Just like you. You’re way too pretty,” you grin at her and she looks at you, appalled. 

“No way!! You’re prettier!!” 

Your jaw physically drops at her statement. 

“No way!” 

You spend the next few minutes bickering with her on the useless topic. You weren’t ugly. But you weren’t gorgeous like Sana was either. You were average. In fact, you felt as though puberty had just hit you as you graduated high school. You grew an inch or two taller and your acne had cleared up. You had grown your hair out so that it was a change from your normal short hair. But that didn’t make you much more beautiful. It’s fine; you loved yourself anyway. 

“Finally!” Sungwoon groans and you look up at the door. 

Big mistake. 

You knew that there was a chance he’d be here. You had heard from so many people that he had gone to school in Seoul. But that didn’t make it any easier to see his face. 

Park Jimin looks up from his phone, grinning at his friends. 

The amount of change you see from eighth grade Jimin is slightly shocking. 

His hair is still black, but instead of the classic ‘coconut’ hairstyle he had before, it is parted on the side, exposing his forehead and resting against his skin in fluffy strands. His skin is as clear as it’s always been (he’d always been particular about skincare) and he has grown much taller than before. While you were taller than him in middle school, now he could use your head as an armrest if he so desired. His arms were toned with muscles easily visible from the plain white T-shirt he was wearing. His muscled thighs were covered with black skinny jeans and you had to physically tear your eyes away to avoid staring. 

His smile was still the same. His eyes crinkle up into crescents when he grins at his group. 

You had gradually stopped remembering him as he moved out of your life. It had become easier to talk to him and walk by his house without waving to his mother. But now that you’re seeing him, the feeling of missing him hits you tenfold. You shakily smile at Sana as she continues to talk, thankful that she didn’t notice your moment of weakness. Though you can’t help but keep your ears open. 

Behind Jimin enters another young man who is slightly taller than him but equally as handsome. He too is very toned and he has a wide smile that brightens up the whole room.

“Oh? Hoseok hyung? I thought you said you couldn’t make it?” Taehyung grins, looking at the man behind Jimin. Hoseok shrugs. 

“Eh, I needed a break,” 

“Well don’t just stand there,” another guy at the table with Taehyung says boredly. He has mint green hair, very pale skin, and dark cat-like eyes. ���Sit down,” 

Jimin walks straight past you as you turn your head to the opposite side. 

“What’s wrong?” Sana asks, leaning forward and lowering her voice to a whisper. 

“You know the one in the white T-shirt?” you ask, covering one half of your face with your palm. She nods. 

“Yeah, Park Jimin? He’s Taehyung’s best friend,” 

A sharp stab of pain hits your chest as you remember the time when that used to be you. 

“Yeah, him. We grew up together. We used to be best friends when we were younger but then…” you trailed off. Sana grew sympathetic. 

“Let me guess: he thought he’d found better friends and forgot about you?” 

“Basically,” you mutter. She waves her hand. 

“Who cares?! His loss. It’s your birthday; don’t think about that loser! Besides I get my wife all to myself now,” she winks and you grin. “Are you done with your dinner, wife?” 

You nod with a smile. 

“Yup, let’s pay,” 

She stops you. 

“AHSUSH!! WAIT A SECOND!!” then she turns to one of the staff there and nods. Then, out of nowhere, they bring out a chocolate cupcake with a single lit candle and set it in front of you. A few of the staff sing Happy Birthday, along with Sana who is screaming the song as though she wants the whole world to know that you were born today. You smile in embarrassment as she finishes the song. 

You lean forward and blow out the candle without making a proper wish. People clap and you smile at them. From your side you hear clapping too, and when you look up, both Taehyung and Hoseok are clapping. You offer a weak smile at the both of them but you can’t help yourself. 

You look to Park Jimin and meet his eyes for the first time. 

His expression is difficult to decipher. He is not smiling, nor does he smile when you look at him. He looks at you as though you are a ghost. 

You look away and smile at Sana. You do not want to ruin your birthday. 

“Thank you,” you grin at her. She nods proudly and motions for you to eat, though she too looks at Park Jimin from the corner of her eyes, and has to resist a glare. 

***

You cannot believe your luck. 

What were the odds that you would get paired up with him for a project? 

Seemingly, very high. 

Taehyung smiles at you as he approaches you after your class and bows quickly. 

“Hi! Even though we’ve been in the same class for the last four months, we’ve never talked. It’s nice to meet you! I’m Kim Taehyung,” 

You look at him warily. Why is he so nice? 

He had a reputation for being a heartbreaker… 

Nonetheless, you smile up at him awkwardly and reciprocate a lower bow. 

“Nice to meet you too. I’m (Last Name) (Name),” 

He grins. 

“I know,” 

You are tempted to ask how he knows you, but you keep your mouth shut and instead try a smile. 

“You’re a first year, aren’t you?” he makes small conversation as you start walking. You nod. 

“And you’re a second?” 

He smiles. 

“So when do you want to do this project?” you ask him, now cutting directly to the chase. He pauses to think before a small rectangular smile graces his handsome face. 

“Does this weekend work for you?” he asks and you nod. There is a lot of other work you have to do, but you would prefer to finish the project and to get away from Taehyung as soon as possible. You don’t want to risk anything with him or his best friend. His smile widens. 

“Cool. I’ll text you the address, yeah?” he asks, holding out his phone and you belatedly realize that he wants your number. You take the phone and input your digits before handing it back to him. He grins and quickly raises his phone to capture a picture of your stunned face before you can even process. 

“No!! Why did you-?! Taehyung, delete it!!” you whine, reaching forward as he stretches his hand up high. 

Curse your height. 

“I needed a contact picture!” he laughs. You groan and frown up at him. A quiet ding! sounds in your pocket and Taehyung smiles. 

“See ya Saturday, (Name)!” he tips his head and then turns around to leave as though he is the most carefree person on the planet. You are not convinced. He still has his reputation and you will not put it past him to live up to it. When you do check your phone, you can only sigh when you read ‘TAEHYUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG’ 

“Where are you going at this hour?” Sana asks from where she is sprawled across her bed. You slide your laptop into your satchel and swing it over your left shoulder. 

“I have a project for Photography so I’m meeting my partner to work on it,” you answer as you slip a pair of boots on and open the door. 

“Ah, I thought you were going on a date,” she giggles. You quickly look down to the beige sweater, black leggings and boots that make up your outfit, before quickly touching your loose hair. 

“Why? Does it look like I tried too hard?!” you ask, panicking just a little. She smiles with confusion. 

“No? I just meant you looked cute,” 

You sighed with relief. 

“Good. My partner is Kim Taehyung and I do not need him to think that I’m into him,” you say, shutting your eyes with slight frustration. Sana snorts with amusement. 

“Kim Taehyung?” she grins. “Oh, good luck with that, babe,” 

“Thanks,” you respond with a playful roll of your eyes and bid her goodbye before shutting the door behind you. As you walked out of your dorm building, you pulled up the address Taehyung had sent you yesterday. You had assumed that he would have invited you to his dorm or something similar, but from the minimal knowledge you had about your college, it didn’t seem like this address was on campus. Perhaps some cafe or library where you two could work without disturbance? You shrugged it off and started the walk, seeing that it took about 15 minutes and mentally prepared yourself for Kim Taehyung’s personality. 

After around 20 minutes of walking, you are shocked to find yourself face to face with an apartment building. It looks decent, not too dilapidated nor too lavish. It seems cozy and has a warm feeling to it that you can’t quite explain. Nonetheless, you are wary and do not want to enter the wrong place so you shoot Taehyung a quick text. 

(Name): am I at the right place??

You start pacing as you await an answer, too nervous to go to the door. After a few minutes, you get too impatient and call him instead. Three rings pass and then: 

“Ah (Name)? Sorry, I didn’t see your text!! Wait, imma open the door and if you see me, you’re in the right place!!”

You heard some muffled shouting and shuffling before the door was wrenched open and there stood a beaming Kim Taehyung. You disconnected the call and couldn’t help the small smile when he started excessively waving at you. You walked up the stairs and followed him as he began speaking. 

“Did you get here okay?” 

“Mhm,” you nod. “Thanks for asking. Is this your apartment?” 

“Eh sorta,” he grins. “I have a friend, Seokjin, who’s in his final year. This is technically his apartment. But me and a couple other guys live here too. We all pitch in for costs and rent and stuff,”

“Ohhh,” you acknowledge. “Makes sense,” 

“Yeah,” he smiles. “It’s real fun. Instead of one roommate, I have six,” 

He leads you to a door, opens it, and you are hit with an influx of shouting. A pile of shoes spills out of a closet and the smell of noodles wafts through the air. Despite the clear lack of cleanliness, you grin as you hear the boyish voices around the apartment. It must be nice, living together like this. Taehyung notices your grin and smiles to himself. 

“They’re all really nice, don’t worry,” he eases and you smile at him. 

“I’m not worried at all,” 

“Good,” he grabs your hand and tugs you forward. 

“Taehyung? Is that you?” a voice calls and from the kitchen emerges the most handsome man you had ever seen in your life. He had to be some kind of movie star or model because he literally had the most aesthetically pleasing face ever. He catches your eyes and smiles kindly. 

“Oh hello,” he greets. 

“Hello,” you bow and you can’t help but smile back at him. He just emits friendliness. 

“(Name), this is Seokjin. This is his apartment,” 

“Sorry for intruding, Seokjin,” you smile apologetically and he waves you off with the spatula in his hand. It’s then that you notice the Kiss the Cook apron he’s wearing. Except he's crossed out the Cook and wrote Worldwide Handsome in black Sharpie. What a fitting nickname. 

“It’s nothing at all. You wanna stay for dinner?” he asks and you’re tempted to say yes just by smelling the food cooking in the kitchen. Taehyung answers for you.

“Most probably yes,” he interjects and you look at him with a raised eyebrow and try to protest. “Oh shush, kid,” he swats a hand by your face. 

“I’m a year younger than you!” you argue. 

“Younger,” Taehyung stresses and you groan. Seokjin grins at the two of you and turns to go back to his cooking. 

“Well, get to work kiddos,” 

Taehyung leads to you the living room where three men are stationed. The first two look familiar and you realize that you had seen them at the restaurant back when you first saw Taehyung. One of them is lazily draped across the sofa and has the same mint hair and cat-like eyes that you remember. The second is leaning against the couch and scrolling on his phone. He is the one with the bright smile, you recall. The third is the one you haven’t seen. He looks to be your age and he’s wearing very oversized black clothing. He sits on the floor in front of the TV with a remote control in his class. 

“That’s Yoongi hyung, Hoseok hyung, and Jeongguk who’s in your year,” Taehyung points to each of them respectively. Yoongi looks up at you and nods with a small smile, which you reciprocate. Hoseok catches your eyes and grins. 

“Ah! Birthday girl?” he points and you groan with a playful smile. 

“Oh you remember that? That’s embarrassing,” 

He laughs, a sound you decide you like a lot and you smile cheekily. The last one, Jeongguk, looks up at you and smiles, and you suddenly think of a bunny. 

“Oh? You’re in my year? Cool,” he grins and you smile back. 

“Overwatch?” you ask, pointing to the screen and his smile widens. 

“Yeah,” he nods. “You play?” 

You shake your head no. “I have no clue how to,” 

“Well, Jeongguk can teach you the next time you come over,” Taehyung says, now pulling you in the direction of his room. You raise a brow. 

“Bold of you to assume there’ll be a next time,” 

Hoseok and Jeongguk laugh, the latter inputting a playful “She got you, hyung!”

Taehyung grins at you. 

“You won’t be able to stay away, sweetheart,” 

You scoff with a smile, slightly amazed that you’re already this comfortable with these guys. 

“Ah, which one of you idiots touched my computer?!” an irritated voice yells from down the hall. A door is wrenched open and out storms another man who is like eight feet tall. Okay, not really, but he is very tall. Much taller than you. 

“It was Jin hyung,” Jeongguk comments, not taking his eyes off of the screen. The man’s shoulders relax. 

“Damn, I can’t even yell at him. Hyung, please don’t touch my computer!” 

“YAH!! IT WASN’T ME THAT BRAT IS SETTING ME UP!!” you hear Seokjin yell angrily from the kitchen and when you catch Jeongguk’s grin, you can’t help but laugh. Namjoon glares at Jeongguk, who flashes such cute puppy eyes, you almost melt yourself. Namjoon groans. 

“Okay fine I’m letting you off this time,” he warns. “But next time…” he lets his threat hang in midair, but even Jeongguk doesn’t seem to take it seriously. The tall man looks to you then and smiles. His dimples, you notice, are extremely cute. 

“Sorry you had to hear all of that,” he apologizes. “I’m Namjoon,” 

You grin at him. “No worries. It was quite entertaining. I’m (Name),” 

“Well if you’re gonna come around here often, you’ll get used to it,” Namjoon comments cheekily and you laugh. 

“C’mon (Name). We should probably start working,” Taehyung smiles and you wave goodbye to the other boys as Taehyung leads you to his room. When you enter, you are a bit surprised by what you see. You never expected Kim Taehyung to be so...artistic. 

Paintings litter on one half of the room, assumably Taehyung’s side. A saxophone rests against the wall and polaroids are stuck to the walls. You can’t help but smile. The other half of the room is a bit different. A laptop and multiple notebooks are scattered across the bed and there is a whole shelf of novels that you are dying to explore. 

“Do you share a room with one of them?” you ask Taehyung, who nods. 

“Namjoon hyung,” 

You smile as you study the room and realize that these boys are probably so different from each other.  

Taehyung tells you to take a seat and the two of you began to work. 

You notice that Kim Taehyung is very easy to talk to. His reputation, it isn’t as bad as people say. He doesn’t seem like a heartbreaker and in fact, comes off as someone who values love a lot. Especially after the conversation you have with him. 

“So…” he comments randomly as he pulls up images. “You interested in someone?” 

You can’t help but be playful. “Why? Already like me?” 

“Maybe~” he grins. 

“But to answer your question, nope!” you chirp. “At least not yet. I mean I just ended a relationship before the year started,” 

“Ah,” Taehyung acknowledges. “I just finished a relationship two weeks ago,” 

“Oh?” you ask and you are about to recoil because you suddenly see the “fuckboy” Taehyung everyone talks about. You remember the rumors about how Kim Taehyung was dumping yet another girl. You remember pitying the girl he had been with and pitying all of the girls he had been with before vowing that you would never show remorse for a man like that. But he stops your thoughts with his next words. 

“Yeah, she wasn’t right for me,” he sighs, looking down and you think he looks genuinely upset. “I wish I could just fall in love already,” 

You blink. “What do you mean? If you didn’t love her, why date her?” 

“Well,” he sighs. “It’s like this. Why did you date your ex if you clearly could let him or her go?” he asks, looking up at you. You stop to think but he answers for you. “Because you didn’t really love them. Maybe you thought that you did, but if you really did, you wouldn’t be able to leave them,” 

His words are intelligent and accurate and you know it. 

“The same happens to me. I think I get interested in girls easily. Maybe because I admire people too much or I find myself liking their personalities. And no, it’s not because I just want to sleep with them like everyone says. I genuinely care for the girls I sleep with because I did genuinely think I loved them,” he admits and you listen attentively because as much as you don’t want to believe it, Kim Taehyung is telling the whole truth. “So yeah, maybe people think that I’m some kind of fuckboy and I sleep around too much. But I have never once dated a girl with the intention of getting in her pants. I’ve always dated a girl because I loved her but I break up with them because I realize that I was wrong,” 

You want to protest against everything he has revealed but it all makes so much sense and it is all too relatable. Why did you break up with Youngjae if you really loved him? And if you really did love him, you wouldn’t let distance or separate interests be a reason for breaking up with him. If anything, you’d fight to stay with him. Right? 

So you smile up at Kim Taehyung and say: “I understand,” 

It doesn’t seem likely, but after that conversation, it is so much more easier to talk to Taehyung. As you both organize the snapshots across the floor, you animatedly recall something funny that happened in high school and he eagerly recounts an embarrassing experience from a middle school play. You laugh and giggle and you wonder how someone so sweet can have such a bad reputation. You are happy to have made a friend. A few hours later, Seokjin’s voice calls for both of you to come for dinner. It is then that you realize it is nearing 9:00. You have stayed very late, but you don’t really want to leave. If Taehyung is as nice as this, you are curious to get to know the other boys. So when he asks if you want to stay for dinner, you shyly agree. When you walk to the table, you take a seat in between Taehyung and Jeongguk and look to Seokjin. 

“I’m really sorry again for intruding, Seokjin,” you say sheepishly to the eldest. He clicks his tongue. 

“Oh, stop apologizing and eat, kid,” his casual tone makes you grin and do as he says. Dinner is filled with bickering and laughs, and it evokes a fuzzy feeling in your chest. So, this is what it’s like to be best friends? Best friends that are close like family. The feeling stays as Seokjin starts berating Namjoon for breaking his cup and as Jeongguk accidentally splashes chili paste on Hoseok’s shirt. You are so happy. Seokjin packs up some leftovers as Jeongguk whines for dessert. He wants ice-cream, and as soon as he says it, you start craving it, too. It doesn’t take much for the male with the bunny smile to convince you, and then you join in on the pestering of the eldest. He gives in eventually, despite his protests, but ends up piling the most scoops into his bowl, ignoring Jeongguk’s cheeky smirk. 

“What time do you have to leave, (Name)?” Yoongi asks as he seats himself on the couch, watching you shove a spoonful of ice-cream into your mouth with a small smile. 

“Well, I technically should have left way earlier,” you admit and the mint-haired male chuckles. 

“Wanna stay for a bit longer? We normally watch movies on Saturday night no matter how stupid they are,” Yoongi doesn’t seem like the type to really enjoy spending time around new people, so you are very flattered at his words and agree to watch with them. 

“I probably won’t stay for the whole movie though,” 

“Just stay for a bit then,” the second-eldest mutters, cuddling into a blanket and Hoseok laughs from his spot on the floor. 

“Wow, Yoongi hyung must really like you, (Name). He’s never this nice,” 

Yoongi shoots him a withering glare. “Well she’s definitely less annoying than you are,” 

Seokjin, Jeongguk, and Taehyung laugh at his statement and you can vaguely hear Namjoon complaining about the tiny bit of ice-cream you all had left for him.

Soon enough, you all are settled and Up is playing on the screen. Jeongguk has volunteered to share his ice-cream with Namjoon, which is funny because he seems like he doesn’t share very often. You can’t help but smile as you hear Taehyung sniffle when Ellie dies and Yoongi yells an exasperated: “You cry at this scene every time! We literally just watched this movie last month!”

You cannot wait to tell Sana how happy these boys make you feel. 

About half way through the movie, when your bowls are all cleaned and you are sleepily leaning against Taehyung’s shoulder, you hear the sound of the front door open. 

“Finally,” Seokjin complains. “It took you long enough. Why do you even live here? You might as well live in the studio, you punk!!” 

A tinkling laugh rings from the hallway and you hear the shoe closet close. 

“Ah, you know I wouldn’t be able to live without you guys~” a voice sings, and you can hear the smile in it. It is very familiar and you know it and your heart speeds up and you want to leave. Footsteps approach the living room and you hold your breath. 

“We wouldn’t miss you,” Yoongi comments, eyes still trained on the movie. The person laughs again. 

“Love you too, Yoongi hyung,” 

And in walks the one reason everything will be ruined. In walks Park Jimin, in all his smiling glory. Your chest constricts and you have to remind yourself who this is. He is grinning though you can see the fatigue in his body. He is wearing a black T-shirt that is slightly damp from sweat and his black hair is messy across his forehead. His eyes shine with mischief and the feeling of nostalgia rises in your chest until it suffocates you. His kind brown eyes-like chocolate they are-scan the scene in front of him with indescribable softness. He is looking at his entire world. Until he stops at you. You wish you could disappear when you see that expression change. The light leaves his eyes and his pretty smile drops. His lips part and his shoulders sag and you feel almost ashamed without a reason. 

“You missed hanging out with (Name), Jiminie,” Taehyung says innocently and you have to stop the gasp. Jiminie. Jiminie was your nickname for him.

“(Name), this is the last member of our little family, Jimin. Jimin, this is (Name),” 

You can’t bring yourself to speak and neither, it seems, can he. He looks away from your misting eyes, and you have to swallow the growing lump in your throat. (Name), you idiot. Why are you so upset?

“It’s nice to meet you, Jimin,” you mumble and his head shoots up to look into your eyes and you feel exposed and fake and disgusting. But why? You didn’t throw away this friendship. He did.

You don’t wait for his answer and instead throw the blanket off of your knees before standing up quickly. Jeongguk, who had been sitting at your feet, raises a brow. 

“Where are you going, (Name)?” 

You laugh awkwardly, your voice becoming thick with unshed tears. 

“Sorry, Jeongguk. It’s really late and my roommate is pretty worried. Plus, I said I’d stay for dinner and now the movie’s practically done. I should head back home,” you make up a lame excuse and want to kick yourself for throwing away your time with these boys. “Thank you guys for having me,” 

“You can stop by anytime,” Seokjin says gently, standing up and helping you drown out Taehyung’s whining for you to stay. “I mean it, kid,” 

Though his smile drops a little when he sees the liquid pooling in your eyes. “Hey, are you--?” 

“I’ll try to stop by whenever I can,” you smile, trying to mask every single stupid thought in your head. “Thank you, Seokjin,”

You try to get him to drop the topic when you utter those words, hoping it gets through to him. He studies your face, his eyes worried, but seems to get it and nods. 

“Of course,” 

“Bye guys,” you say, and then turn to the door, not bothering to listen to their farewells. You pass by Jimin, but don’t meet his eyes. You don’t have the courage. 

You can’t help but cry to Sana when you open the door of your dorm room. You can’t relay any of the positive things that had occupied your evening but instead you spill everything about the one negative thing. Sana tries to calm you but she can now see how one measly friendship has affected your whole life. But she poses two questions that are important and make you think: “Do you really think that your friendship with Jimin should affect how you are with the other boys? Is it really worth it?”

And she is right, it is not worth it. You will not let go of six sweet people for one person who didn’t keep an unspoken promise. And with that vow to yourself, you drift off to sleep, your dreams filled with cat-like eyes, bunny smiles, and dimples. 

You are not surprised when Kim Taehyung takes a seat next to you after class on Monday, his eyebrows furrowed. 

“What happened on Saturday, (Name)?” he asks and you don’t really know how to respond. 

“What do you mean?” you chuckle awkwardly. “I told you I had to leave,” 

“Bullshit,” he dismisses and you sigh. “You were upset. What is it about Jimin that makes you upset?” You look at him with wide eyes and he breathes out. “I can’t believe you thought I wouldn’t notice…” 

You gulp at the slightly upset expression on his face. “This is all my fault. I shouldn’t have brought you home without telling you about the guys. I just assumed that there wouldn’t be any problems and I-” 

It takes you a minute to realize that he is blaming himself and you hurry to stop him. 

“No no, Taehyung! It’s not your fault or anybody else’s fault, okay?” He doesn’t look very convinced, but then in the softest voice he can muster, he puts a hand on your shoulder and asks “What is it, (Name)? What’s wrong?” 

And you trust him. You really do. “Let’s go get some coffee. I’ll tell you everything,”

So you spend about two hours sitting across from Taehyung as he listens intently. He takes small sips from his hot chocolate as you tell of the childish Park Jimin you had come to rely on. He watches you trace indistinguishable patterns on the cup of your caramel macchiato as you recount the heartbreak you had felt when Park Jimin disappeared from your life altogether. At the end of your story, you sit in front of him, feeling miserable and wondering why you ranted about Park Jimin to his best friend. You’re half expecting Taehyung to yell at you and tell you that he never wants you near him or the boys again. But, as usual, Kim Taehyung is full of surprises. 

“I’m so sorry that happened to you, (Name),” Taehyung says sympathetically. “Jimin can really be an idiot sometimes,” 

You scoff out a laugh. “Tell me about it,” 

“And what he did was horrible,” Taehyung continues. “But I promise you from the bottom of my heart that Jimin is not a bad person. From what you told me, I think he genuinely cared about you,” 

“Then why did he just cut me off like that?” you question. 

“Listen, I’m not gonna defend what he did. It was stupid and immature. But I think most teenagers are at that age. I mean, the fact that he continued to be your best friend throughout middle school just shows that he cared about you. And maybe once he went to high school, he just found new friends. Maybe he didn’t mean to cut you off but it was just hard to reconnect with you. And if he did do it purposefully, it was probably because of peer pressure. At that age, a guy and a girl can’t be just friends. It always means there’s something more. Maybe he was trying to avoid that. And I know that doesn’t give him an excuse and that doesn’t make it right. I’m just trying to give you some closure and help you figure out why it happened. I mean I’m sure there's been a time where you’ve been influenced by those around you,” You think back to seventh grade and nod hesitantly. Taehyung smiles sadly. 

“I’m not telling you to forgive him. Heck, I’m not even telling you to forget about it. But I don’t want this thing to affect you like this. I don’t want you to come over and be reminded of what happened. And I don’t want to see you upset like that everytime you see his face. Whether you like it or not, you’re with us now. Don’t let one friendship define how the rest of your friendships will be,” he finishes and you don’t even realize that you’re tearing up until you are hugging him with everything in your being. “And who knows, maybe if you show that what happened doesn’t bother you, that idiot Park Jimin might get some sense knocked into him and realize what kind of a friend he missed out on,”  

You manage a smile and nod, knowing that Kim Taehyung is right. Both he and the other boys are worth it. 

The following weekend seems almost like deja vu. Sana once again is sprawled across her bed watching you carefully as you tug on a knitted sweater over your black jeans. This time, there is no need for a bag so you just tuck your wallet and phone into your back pockets as you smooth down your hair. 

"And where are you going, missy?" Sana asks as she pulls up the latest show on Netflix that she had been invested in. 

"I'm going to hang out with Taehyung and the other guys at their house," you reply and catch her brow raise. 

"I knew you'd fall for Taehyung eventually," she sighs and you laugh. 

"I haven't," you grin. "Don't worry. You know I would never leave you," 

"You'd better not," she laughs as you tug on your boots and walk to the door. "Text me if you decide to come home or not!” 

You feel confident and not too nervous and you walk to Seokjin’s apartment. In fact, you are sort of excited. You are excited to hang out with the boys and you are excited to look into Park Jimin’s eyes and show him that you are not hurt by him. You want to get past this. You don’t have the intention to make him feel guilty about what he did. How can you blame someone for finding new friends? It is a natural process. And sure it hurt a lot, but no matter what, you still care about Jimin and you can’t bring yourself to hate him just because he isn’t your best friend anymore. With those thoughts in mind, when you reach Seokjin’s apartment, you don’t hesitate to knock on the door. From inside you hear the man yell: “(NAME)’S HERE GET THE DOOR!! JEONGGUK-AH OPEN THE DOOR!!”

You can’t help but grin at the eldest’s words, and smile wider when you come face to face with Jeongguk’s beaming face. 

“You made it!” he smiles, and opens the door wider for you to enter. You nod. 

“Yeah, I couldn’t stay away,” you reply and his bunny-like grin turns into a smirk. 

“You like me that much, huh?” You blanch at his statement before giggling. 

“Wow, you sound exactly like Taehyung,” 

He laughs. “Yeah, but I’m way hotter,” 

You nod with a serious expression. “Way hotter,” 

The two of you walk into the living room where Hoseok and Namjoon greet you. It is easy for you to relax with them. You plop on the couch and begin to complain to them about the annoying boy who sits next to you in Journalism and smile when Seokjin starts cursing him out. 

“Hey, where’s Yoongi?” you ask, missing the mint-haired man’s occasional snide remarks.

“Probably producing some shit at the studio,” Seokjin replies and tosses you his phone. “Call him,” 

You grin and do as told, once Namjoon told you that Seokjin’s password was 1234. You scroll for Yoongi’s contact and call him, putting him on speaker. 

“Hyung, you know I’ll be home soon,” his voice says from the other end. 

“I’m not your hyung~” you grin. 

“Oh, hey (Name),” 

“Hey Yoongi,” 

“Are you at the house right now?” 

“Yeah, I kinda missed you so I wanted to see what you were up to,” 

“Is this just a way to get me to stop my work?” 

“I don’t know, is it working?” 

“.....You sound exactly like Jeongguk when he calls to get me home,” 

The male mentioned winks at you and you snigger. “Are you coming or what, hyung?” Jeongguk yells into the phone and Yoongi sighs. 

“Fine, I’ll be there soon,”

The line goes dead before you can get another word in and you laugh. 

“You know, he acts like he hates us but I’m 100 percent sure he loves spending time with us,” Taehyung says and the others easily agree. The front door then opens and you hold your breath. It’s Jimin. 

Except instead of the smiling male, a pretty girl walks in. She is most definitely older than you, with her straight brown hair and bangs covering her forehead. 

“Hey guys,” she greets, tucking her keys into her purse. 

“Hey noona,” Jeongguk replies, his eyes glued to Overwatch just like the last time you visited. 

“Is that Eunji?” Seokjin asks and she laughs. 

“Yes! Hi, Seokjin!!” 

He yells back a greeting and she looks at you and smiles. 

“Hi, I’m Jung Eunji, nice to meet you,” she introduces politely and you reciprocate. 

“I’m (Last Name) (Name). It’s nice to meet you too,” you smile. 

“She’s in my year,” Jeongguk comments and Eunji nods. 

“Cool, I’m in Yoongi’s year,” at your acknowledgment she smiles once again. “I’ll be right back,” 

As soon as she leaves, you turn to Taehyung, who looks a bit irritated. “Is that Yoongi’s girlfriend?” you ask, and Taehyung laughs as the front door opens. This time, it really is Jimin. He looks different from last week. His eyes are sunken in and he looks like he will pass out any time soon. But he is still handsome, and manages a small smile. 

“Jiminie? Is that you?” Eunji calls from down the hall before she approaches him. And there is the use of your old nickname once again. “Hey baby,” she whispers as she walks up to him and places a hand on his cheek. 

“Hey noona,” he mumbles, closing his eyes at her touch. 

“Nope,” Taehyung mutters from your left in response to your previous question. “She’s Jimin’s girlfriend,” 

And when you look to the scene in front of you, watching Eunji press her lips to Jimin’s gently, you feel an overwhelming disappointment rise up in your chest. It appears out of nowhere, rising and rising until it settles as a hard lump in the back of your throat. The feeling is faintly familiar, lingering in the crevices of your subconscious, a memory that does not want to be revisited. 

“Oh,” you mutter. It is all you can manage and Taehyung doesn’t say anything about your tone. If he notices, he doesn’t choose to comment on it. 

“Jeez, babe,” Eunji mumbles, dragging her thumb across the bags under Jimin’s eyes. “How long have you been working yourself?” 

Jimin doesn’t reply as his eyes settle on you. You feel your hands start to sweat, but remember the pep talk you had given yourself earlier. You give him a small, unsure smile and he continues to look at you. Eunji doesn’t seem to be expecting a reply either, because she wraps her arm around Jimin’s waist and starts walking him towards his room. 

“C’mon, you should at least take a nap,” you hear her voice fade as she shuts the bedroom door. Your shoulders sag unknowingly. You hear Taehyung scoff as Seokjin walks into the living room with food. 

“Oh Kim Taehyung, you big baby,” he rolls his eyes, munching on some Doritos. “Stop it now,” 

“Stop what?” you ask, looking between the two. Taehyung’s brows are furrowed and he sticks his lips out into a pout. 

“I can’t help it. I don’t like her,” he whines. Hoseok rolls his eyes as he watches Jeongguk play, the black-haired male also listening in on the conversation. 

“She’s a sweetheart,” Hoseok sighs as you hear the front door open once again. Yoongi walks in, looking tired as hell. He throws his bag in the corner and plops next to Namjoon, who is intently reading, while running his hand through his mint-green hair. 

“She seems pretty nice,” you agree, looking at the male next to you. 

“Yeah, I know,” Taehyung mutters dejectedly. “I just--...you really don’t see how they don’t go together?” 

“You’re the only one who really has a problem with it,” Seokjin shrugs. “Besides, Jimin’s an adult. He can take care of himself,” 

“I guess,” Taehyung sighs. “They’re just….I don’t know…” 

“How long have they been dating?” you ask, trying to keep your tone light. 

“Like six months?” Yoongi answers. “They started dating around when school started,” 

“Yeah, and they haven’t really had any problems yet. I don’t see why you’re so skeptical of her, Tae,” Namjoon inputs. 

“The thing that bothers me is that Jimin always tells me who he’s interested in. And he’s the type of person to take his time falling for someone. He wants time to really know them before he asks them out and stuff. But he never mentioned that he was interested in Eunji,” Taehyung tries reasoning. Jeongguk seems to understand. 

“It seemed kinda impulsive, right? To date her?” the ravenette asks and Taehyung eagerly nods. 

“That’s exactly right!” 

Yoongi ponders this. “Yeah I can see where that’s coming from. But we don’t really have any choice. He’s obviously still into the idea of dating her so we might as well live with it,” 

That night as you head home after finishing Iron Man 2 with the boys (it had been Jeongguk’s turn to pick), you thought back to what went on. Jimin had never joined you all and at first you had feared it was because you were there, but Eunji informed you all that the man was just too tired and had been overworking himself throughout the last week. She then joined you and for some reason, your mind kept looking for things to dislike about her. Maybe her voice or her hairstyle. You couldn’t find one flaw and you instead you find yourself wanting to talk with her and laugh with her. She seems like a great girl, and you are thankful that your best friend has someone like her, even if he is not your best friend anymore. 

Months pass by as the last flurries of snow fall to the ground and the first buds of the spring season began to grow from their soil. You continue to hang out with the boys, getting closer and closer to them until you’ve adopted one of Jeongguk’s sweaters as your own and Seokjin has given you your own mug for whatever you want to drink. You don’t see much of Jimin around the house, since he does practically live at the studio. Taehyung tells you that he has a very important dance competition coming up at the end of the year, so he wants to work hard. You are a bit surprised to hear that it is for hip hop. The Jimin you knew used to do contemporary dance. 

But Jimin working hard does not mean you don’t see him. The first time where all of you had hung out, it had definitely felt awkward. Neither of you could start a conversation with one another. But you decide to be brave and just smile at him, gradually moving to ask how his day was, even as you feel Taehyung’s proud smile on you. The black-haired male is surprised, you can see, but he manages to smile back at you and be polite. The smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes. 

This time around, Sana is dressing up with you. “Too much?” she asks, pulling a sparkling red dress out of the closet. You laugh. 

“Yeah, too much. It’s a party at a house, Sana. People will literally show up in jeans,” you grin as you slip on a ruffled long-sleeved dress. 

“True,” she shrugs and pulls out a much more simpler skirt and top to which you flash a thumbs up. After getting dressed, you and Sana go to the house where the party is taking place, Ha Sungwoon’s house, you think. The boys had all told you to come. The house is filled with people and music echoes out of the opened doors. This is your first official party and you can’t help but be a little nervous. Sana is surely the same, so you both cling to each other until you can find some familiar faces. You see quite a few people in your year and in your classes, but you are only, at most, acquaintances, and so you do not want to bother them. Sana finds a few girls she knows, Nayeon and Jeongyeon you think their names are, and tugs you to them. You try to make small talk with the girls, knowing fully well that they are sweet, but you feel out of place. So all while soothing Sana’s worried concerns, you slip away from the trio and begin searching for the boys. You first catch sight of Taehyung, who is sitting on a couch looking extremely bored as a girl tries to chat him up. You want to laugh at his expression, but take pity on the guy and saunter up to both of them before grabbing his arm. 

“There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you~” you bat your eyelashes up at the male, who’s unimpressed expression tinges with realization. The corners of his lips twitch upwards and his eyes flicker towards the confused female who had been flirting with him. 

“Ah sorry baby. Let’s get you a drink, hm?” he gets up and tugs you out of eyesight as fast as he can while you chuckle. He is laughing happily when he turns to face you. “You are a savior sent by heaven, (Name). Thank you,” 

“Hey no need to thank me. Can’t have my best friend not getting that perfect love he’s always talking about,” you laugh but Taehyung stares at you, his eyes softening and a gentle smile overtaking his handsome face. “What?” you giggle. 

“You called me your best friend,” 

You pause. You did, didn’t you? You refused to have a real best friend after what happened and how much it affected you, but there, you went and said it. You said it to Kim Taehyung and you feel great about it. 

“Yeah, I guess I did. Love you, Tae Tae,” you say, and he smiles so wide it basically blinds you. Your heart feels like it’s mending. It feels nice. Taehyung is glomping you in the next second, very happy. So much that you can feel his smile radiating off of him. 

“Ok, let’s actually get drinks,” Taehyung grins and tugs you off into the crowd. A bit later, you find a comfortable seat with your drink, slightly away from the main crowd but close enough to ensure you don’t look awkward, since Taehyung said he was going to go find Namjoon. You watch Seokjin loudly playing a very uncoordinated version of Beer Pong as the people around him cheer him on, and you can’t help but laugh. Soon enough, Jeongguk joins you and helps you laugh at the eldest as the two of you take slow sips of your drinks. You began to chat with him, finding comfort and familiarity in the male’s presence. In the midst, he gets up and gets you a refill and as you down the drink you start to feel just a bit tipsy, but nothing too dangerous. After your third drink...or was it fourth? Well anyway, after drinks, you and Jeongguk are stumbling around like hyperactive third graders. The two of you end up plopping down on stools and Jeongguk puts his head on the counter, grinning sleepily. 

“Are you drunk, Gukkie~?” you tease, unaware that you are just as drunk. 

“Nah,” he slurs. “I’m a man. Men don’t get drunk,” 

“You’re still a babyyy~~~” you tease, ruffling his wavy hair and he frowns. 

“You’re my age, (Name),” he retorts as his eyes start shutting. 

“Are you sleepy?” you suddenly whisper, leaning close to him with wide eyes. 

“Nah,” he mutters. “I’m a man. Men don’t get sleepy,” 

You giggle, but when you look back, Jeongguk is fast asleep. You sigh and smile at the male, not having it in you to leave him alone. You start taking slower sips from your drink and scroll through Instagram to kill time. In your drunk state, you manage to take shaky videos of Jeongguk mumbling nonsense in his sleep, knowing that it would serve for great blackmail material in the near future. You’re about to text Taehyung to tell him that you want you leave when someone plops in the seat next to you. You blink in surprise at Park Jimin’s figure. He turns to you and gives you an almost smile.  

“Jeonggukie giving you trouble?” he asked, taking a sip of his drink. You shake your head. 

“Nah. He’s been asleep for a while. I didn’t really want to leave him alone,” you answer, feeling slightly nervous. Though, the alcohol in your system is not filtering many of your words. “I was just gonna text TaeTae and tell him that I was way too bored,” 

Jimin chuckled. “What? This party isn’t fun enough for you?” 

“Hell no. What’s so fun about a bunch of sweaty drunk people making out with each other?” You take a big gulp of your drink as Jimin laughs. “Where’s Eunji?” 

Jimin’s chocolate orbs roam around the room. “Not sure. I think she was with her friends the last I checked,” 

You make a sound of acknowledgment before the conversation dies down and an awkward silence ensues. You are contemplating getting up and making a beeline for Taehyung, who is standing on a table and loudly singing Fiction by Beast, but someone decides to break the silence.  

“Oh my god, (Last Name) (Name), is that you??” a feminine voice rings out. You look up to see a familiar face and smile. 

“Somin!” you greet excitedly, looking at the girl in front of you. “How have you been??” 

She grins. She hasn’t changed much since high school except that she has dyed her hair blonde.

“I’ve been good!! I had no idea that we went to the same college!!” 

“Me neither! Small world, huh?” you laugh. She nods. 

“So what’s new?” she asks. “Are you still dating Youngjae?” 

She is being polite, but you still at the bitter subject. She sees your expression and hesitates. 

“It...was Youngjae, right? You dated him when we were seniors?” 

You chuckle awkwardly. 

“Yeah…” you rub your palms together. “Yeah, we dated but we broke up before summer ended,” 

“Oh shit, I’m so sorry,” she looks genuinely apologetic and you laugh, waving a hand dismissively. 

“It’s fine,” 

Her eyes move to Jimin and she smiles. 

“Oh, hello...Jimin right? You were in the grade above us?” 

Jimin is very quiet, looking at you with an unreadable expression but he soon smiles at her politely. 

“Yes I was,”

She smiles at him and then turns to you. 

“Well it was nice seeing you! We should catch up later!!” 

You nod eagerly and wave goodbye to her. After she leaves, you have no idea how to start up a conversation with Jimin. He is looking off into the distance in deep thought. You take another gulp of your drink. 

“(Name), I feel hella drunk…” Jeongguk groans from your side. You laugh loudly. 

“You are drunk, Gukkie~” 

“So are you,” he mumbles. 

“You’re drunkerer than I am,” you grin proudly and Jimin snorts from your other side. 

“Not a real word, (Name),” 

“Yes it is!!” you pout at him, feeling more talkative than you had in a while. 

“Oh really?” 

“Yup, any word that I make is real!!” you giggle and Jimin chuckles with a shake of his head. 

“(NAME) I DARE YOU TO LICK YOUR ELBOW!!” Jeongguk randomly yells, shaking both of your shoulders back and forth. 

“You can’t--” Jimin starts but pauses when he sees you rolling up your sleeve. “(Name), you can’t be serious...” 

And then you proceed to put every fiber of your being into licking your elbow. You obviously are failing, and Jimin can’t help but laugh. Neither can Jeongguk. 

“You try it then!” you yell with an indignant pout before downing the rest of your drink. The bunny-like male smirks confidently. 

“Fine, sweetheart. But I’m the fucking Golden Maknae!” he yells as he pulls off his jacket and hands it to you. He attempts licking his elbow and Jimin is so entertained by the struggle of the self-assured male. 

“Golden Maknae??” you ask in the most confused voice ever. Then you break out into a fit of raucous laughter. “That’s the stupidest nickname I’ve ever heard!!” 

Jeongguk stops licking air and looks at you with the most appalled expression and Jimin loses all sense of self-composure as he starts laughing. 

“You little-!” he starts and then he starts wrestling with you as you shriek and giggle. “C’mon hyung, help me get her!!” 

Jimin bites his lip and then eventually helps the male hold you steady. Jeongguk reels his middle finger back and lets it go, creating a loud thwap! as it hits the skin of your forehead. Jimin has tears in his eyes as he laughs, and despite your complaints of pain, you are giggling too. 

It is fine. It is all fine. It is good. And for once, it feels like everything is back to normal. You are so happy in this moment. But then you start thinking, and despite your giggles, a lump lodges itself in your throat. 

“Oh god, you both are so stupid,” Jimin chuckles gently. You lean back against Jeongguk’s shoulder, a pleasant buzz thrumming through your veins, and with a soft giggle you ask a question that ruins everything. 

“Do you even remember me, Jiminie?” 

Jimin’s chuckles die down and he looks you straight in the eyes, his lips parting just a bit. You are sure you look like a mess in your drunken state and you know your eyes are going to start watering soon. 

“What do you mean ‘remember me’?” Jeongguk mumbles cluelessly from behind you but you don’t answer him. You are waiting for an answer. You don’t seem to be getting one though, since all Jimin does is look down at his lap, clear his throat, and take a sip of his drink. 

That doesn’t sit well with you at all. Maybe it is just the alcohol or maybe it is because you’ve been pretending that he didn’t affect you all this time, but whatever it is makes tears pool in your eyes. You feel pathetic and you don’t want to cry over this but your emotions are all over the place. So all you can manage to do is stand up shakily and get away from there. You can hear Jeongguk’s yells from behind you, but you don’t care. All that is running through your mind is that Park Jimin cannot see you cry. You are too confident and it will most definitely bruise your pride. 

Taehyung is now in the middle of single Sherlock by SHINee but as soon as he catches sight of your face, he stops. He quickly hands the microphone to Seokjin, who is looking at you with concern, and gets down from the table to stand in front of you. 

“What’s wrong, (Nickname)?” he asked frantically, cupping your cheeks in his palms. 

“Can we please go home, TaeTae? I don’t want to be here anymore,” you mumble and Taehyung immediately nods. He turns to tell Hoseok and Seokjin, who both nod quietly before he gently takes your hand and pulls you to the door. He doesn’t say anything at all, which you are extremely grateful for, and he walks next to you in silence. The air is cold and you feel exposed and vulnerable. You are aware that Taehyung is quietly waiting for you to explain yourself and in that moment, you get so irritated. 

“UGH THAT JERK!!” you suddenly yell out into the winter air. Taehyung takes a step back in shock. 

“Who?” he questions. 

“FUCKING PARK JIMIN!” 

Taehyung groans. “Oh what did that idiot do this time?” 

“Just…” you sigh. “Why does it seem like he tries so hard to avoid what happened in the past?” 

“What makes you think that?” Taehyung asks, linking his arm with yours as you both cross the street. 

“I mean it was fine. Me, Jeongguk, and Jimin were talking and having fun and we were all laughing and everything was fine! But then my stupid ass had to go say ‘do you even remember me’ and he didn’t respond. It just became so awkward all over again. I mean, is it so hard for him to just mention what happened? Because I feel like I’m the only one who stresses so much over him and he doesn’t give a fuck about me at all,” you rage and Taehyung listens quietly. 

“Well, why do you?” the male next to you asks and you blanch. 

“I--what?” 

“Why do you stress over him so much, anyway?” Taehyung clarifies. You open your mouth to respond as though it is the simplest thing in the world, but you find that you don’t exactly have an answer for his inquiry. Taehyung chuckles deeply. 

“(Nickname) don’t get offended by this but did you have a crush on Jimin back when you were friends?” 

You stop in your tracks to throw him the most shocked expression possible. 

“What?! Ew, no way! He was my best friend!!” 

“So, you never loved him?” he asks thoughtfully. 

“Well--I, of course I loved him, he was my best friend. Why the heck are you asking me that anyway?” you ask indignantly, feeling your cheeks get hot. Though, Taehyung only puts a hand on his chin. 

“Well, I was just thinking about it. Don’t get me wrong, I know losing a friend can be really tough, especially one you’ve had for so long and been so close with. But I feel like now you should sort of be over it. Or you shouldn’t be so affected by the fact that he isn’t close with you anymore. I feel like you had time to heal,” he explains. 

“But I--” you start to defend yourself but Taehyung raises a hand. 

“Let me finish, (Nickname),” he stops you and you purse your lips. “I know it will always sting. But you’ve made friends after Jimin and you’ve been able to live your life without him for years now. So why is it that just being around him brings you so much pain?” 

You try to think of an answer to his questions. 

“I just think that maybe you confused yourself and loved him this whole time,” the tall brunette finished. 

“Well then why did I fall for Youngjae?” you ask, trying to find holes around what you knew he was assuming. 

“What does Youngjae have to do with this? Of course it’s possible you fell for Youngjae. That doesn’t mean you didn’t ever fall for Jimin. You loved Youngjae obviously. But does that mean that you ever stopped loving Jimin?” 

You pause to look at him. Taehyung continues walking, a soft carefree smile on his face as he admires the winter scenery around him. Flurries of white snow that are descending from the sky settle in his fluffy hair. 

Was he right? Did you love Jimin this whole time? Was it possible that you were convincing yourself that you missed him only because he was your friend and not for any other reason? Were you so stupid to try to deny your own feelings? 

“Hm? Are you coming, (Name)?” Taehyung stops at the end of the sidewalk before an intersection, looking at you in confusion. “What’s wrong?” 

You are thinking about everything you’ve ever known. You think about everything you’ve done with him, every laugh, every game, every cry. You don’t think you can pinpoint any time where you’ve been in love with him. But you see your eighth grade self smiling up at him with adoration. And then you see your 15 year old self sneaking glances at him from across the library, watching as he hangs out with his friends. You see yourself giggling at the jokes he makes during his class president speech despite the fact that he has forgotten you long ago. You remember all the times you would think of him even after he went off to college. 

Taehyung is right. You’ve had so long to distance yourself from him and you’ve had years to teach yourself how to live without him. But strangely, you can’t let him go at all. And just the thought of him puts your heart at ease no matter how many bad memories he has linked to his name. 

You start walking towards Taehyung, who looks slightly confused, and grab his arm. In silence, the two of you walk down the street as you approach your dorm building. 

“Wanna come up?” you mumble to the male, eyeing the snow falling on the streets. Taehyung shakes his head with a small smile. 

“Nah, I should head back to the dorm before Jin hyung calls the police for a search party,” 

You grin before glomping the male into a hug. He is warm and cozy, almost like a sleeping bear in the cold winter.

“You were right,” you mutter to him. “I think I did love Jimin a long time ago. And I think I still do,” 

You pull away with a smile and wave to him, catching sight of the expression on his face, one that his mixed with pride and slight shock. When you get up to your dorm, finding it dark and empty, you breathe a sigh of relief. And for the first time in a very long time, you grab your computer and pull up some very old files. 

And you smile and laugh as you watch your younger self giggle and have fun, your heart fluttering every time you see familiar crescent shaped eyes. 

***

Bad luck seems to always follow you around. You groan loudly in the middle of the street, knowing that passerby are probably looking at you weirdly. 

“Well easy for them to judge,” you mutter. “They have umbrellas,” 

It is true that for the few people who are walking on the street, everyone is protected by an umbrella. And there you were, clad in nothing but sweatpants and a grey hoodie, holding a grocery bag as you trudge down the street. It is already raining a decent amount, and the walk back to the dorm isn’t extremely close. You want to call an Uber or a cab, but you also happened to have left your phone on your desk. 

“(Name) you dumbass,” you curse yourself. “But how was I supposed to know that it would fucking rain?! The forecast said at midnight. Not at nine,” 

You are already drenched and you’re sure that you’ll get sick by the time you get back to the dorm. It was just supposed to be a quick run to the store for some pads, what the hell? 

Then you have an idea and you start speed walking down a familiar route. Surely the boys won’t mind if you take shelter at their apartment until the storm passes? Or at least, everyone except Jimin. At the thought of Jimin, your heart goes through a roller coaster of emotions. You hadn’t spoken to him since the night of your realization. It’ll probably be extremely awkward to see him again. You hope he is at the studio practicing for his big competition. But a part of you also hopes to see him at the dorm. 

Pushing all thoughts of Jimin aside, you find yourself in front of the door to Seokjin’s apartment. Quickly wiping your wet shoes against the welcome mat, you raise a hand and knock, noticing that your fingers are shaking due to the cold. You hear some indistinguishable yelling before the door is thrown open. Kim Taehyung stands in front of you, brown hair falling free. A long sleeved white shirt covers his body and he wears grey sweatpants just like you do. A single Chanel necklace finishes his look and you are about to comment on it when he starts yelling. 

“What the fuck, (Name)?!” 

“HEY MIND YOUR LANGUAGE YOU FUCKING BRAT!!” Seokjin yells from inside and you hear Jeongguk cackle. Taehyung utters a half-hearted apology and turns to you, a scowl on his face. 

“Why the hell are you outside in the rain?! Don’t you know what an umbrella is?!!” 

You roll your eyes at him. “Of course I do! I didn’t know that it would freaking rain while I was walking home. That’s why I’m here!!” 

“Get inside,” he grumbles, tugging your arm and pulling you into the homely apartment. You quickly yell out a greeting to Seokjin, Jeongguk, and Namjoon as you pass them and grin as you hear the eldest reprimanding you for getting wet in the rain. In a few minutes, you are standing awkwardly in Taehyung’s bedroom, trying not get anything wet as he rummages around in his closet. 

“Here,” he says, handing you a pile of clothes. “Put these on and give me your clothes. I’ll put them in the dryer,” 

You take the clothes and smile gratefully before heading into the bathroom to change. You end up loving Taehyung’s oversized clothing, and come out feeling warm and comfortable. He grins at you as you jump into his bed, pulling up the covers for an even toastier feeling. 

“Have you eaten dinner, yet? I think we still have some leftovers,” 

“I did, thanks,” you smile and he waves you off. 

“Wanna watch a movie?” he asks already pulling out his laptop. You nod eagerly. 

"Can I use your phone to call Sana real quick?"

A few minutes later, you are cuddled up next to Taehyung as The Circle of Life starts playing and Rafiki holds up young baby Simba. 

You have fun with Taehyung. He is probably the best company you could have ever asked for and you wish that you’ll be friends with him for a long time. You grin as you hear him sing along to the songs and notice that he has a great voice. 

“Wow, TaeTae,” you muse. “You have a great voice! You should sing more often,” 

“Me?” Taehyung said bashfully. “Nah, it’s nothing great,” 

“Better than I sound,” you laugh as you lean against him. "Maybe you should become a singer," 

"You know I want to be an actor," he lets you snuggle into him with a chuckle. 

"Then maybe you should do musicals. That way you can sing and act. Or you should sing all the soundtracks on your OSTs," 

He laughs. "We'll see," 

You awake to voices. You crack an eye open, realizing that you are not in your own bed. You're still in Taehyung's bed, tucked in comfortably. The voices aren't too loud, but they aren't soft either. They sound like an argument. Namjoon is fast asleep on the other side of the room, papers scattered all over his bed, which makes you smile softly. You sit up slowly, seeing Taehyung's closed laptop at the foot of the bed. Where was Taehyung anyway? 

You swing your legs over the side of the bed and shiver a bit when you rip the covers off of your body. You stand up and quietly walk towards the door. Taking a peek at the clock, you realize that it is already past midnight. The storm seems to be raging still. You slowly pull the door open, not wanting to wake any of the sleeping boys. The arguing gets louder as you approach the living room. 

"I just don't understand what your problem is," Taehyung sighs. You pause. 

"My problem?" Jimin asks incredulously. "Why is she in your bed?" 

Oh he's asking about you. Taehyung breathes out through his nose. 

"Again, I told you. She got caught in the rain and showed up. So I gave her some spare clothes and we watched the fucking Lion King and then we fell asleep. What's so wrong with that?" 

"I just-! Why?! Since when is she so close with the rest of you all that she gets to stay over at our house?" 

Taehyung was beginning to get pissed. "Listen maybe you didn't notice, but since the beginning of the year, she's been getting to know us. So obviously now we're frien--" 

"You've been trying to get into her pants, huh?" Jimin asks with narrowed eyes. “You’ve been trying to get into her pants and that’s why you’ve been so nice and welcoming,” 

You suck in a breath. 

“What?! Why would you say that?! How could you think that about me?!” Taehyung’s voice raises in volume. “I am not--” 

“You’re never this welcoming towards people. Especially towards kids in the other years. You didn’t like Jeongguk for so long after he met us and--” 

“Oh,” Taehyung sneers. “Really? You’re gonna call me out for acting weird. What about you?” 

“What the fuck do you mean by that?” 

“You think I’m being weird by being (Name)’s friend so fast but look at you. You fucking hook up with Eunji out of nowhere. You always tell me who you’re into and you didn’t when it came to her,” 

Jimin blanches. “That has nothing to do with this--” 

“Sure thing, buddy,” Taehyung laughs. “Sure thing. When you can explain why you suddenly became interested in Eunji, then come find me--” 

“But--” 

“And like, what does it matter to you? You obviously couldn’t care less about (Name). So even if I was trying to get into her pants, why the fuck do you care?” 

“I don’t care--” 

“Ha,” Taehyung scoffs out a mocking laugh. “You can’t forget what happened in the past, huh?” 

“What?” Jimin growls. 

“You still remember (Name), don’t you?” 

“Taehyung, what are you talking ab--” 

“Haha, yeah,” he spits with disdain in his voice. “I know about your old best friend (Name),” 

Jimin’s eyes widen. “How the hell do you know? Did she tell you?” 

“That’s not important. What’s important is that you still remember her and that you obviously still care about her--” 

“I do not care,” 

“Oh really,” a devilish smirk forms on Taehyung’s face, one that you have never seen before. “Then it shouldn’t bother you to know that I was just trying to fuck her,” 

“Oh haha, nice try Tae,” Jimin grins mockingly. “You’re just trying to get me to admit that I care. Well I fucking don’t. Do whatever the fuck you want with her,” 

“You’re really going to let me?” 

Jimin shrugs carelessly. “I couldn’t care less. Just add one more name to your list of Girls I Fucked,” 

“There isn’t any part of you that is trying to stop me?! Not even a bit? How could you let someone do that to her??” Taehyung is now angry. “This better not have anything to do with Eunji!” 

“No! It doesn’t have anything to do with Eunji!!”

“Oh really?” 

Jimin sighs. “Yeah and to answer your question, as much as I don’t like the idea of you doing something like that to someone, (Name) isn’t a little girl anymore. She’s free to make her own decisions and if she wants you, then I won’t stand in the way,” 

“Jiminie,” Taehyung sighs. “I don’t want to get into (Name)’s pants, alright? That was never my intention with her. I just want to know why you won’t try with her. What made it so unbearable to be her friend again? From what I know, she’s an absolute sweethear--” 

“I know,” Jimin cuts him off. “She never did anything. I just...feel like a huge jerk whenever I look at her,” 

He chuckles dryly. “I freaking cut her off in high school because I thought I wouldn’t be considered cool if I continued to hang around with her. You tell me how I can face her after that dick move, Taehyungie,” 

Taehyung watches Jimin as he speaks and breaks out into a gentle smile. “Listen, everyone makes mistakes. I’m not justifying what you did but I don’t think that you should be acting weirdly around her just because of that. If you really still care about her, you’ll apologize and try your best to get that relationship again,” 

Jimin manages a small smile before he shoves Taehyung lightly. 

“Since when were you so good at relationship advice?” he grins. Taehyung strokes his imaginary beard thoughtfully. 

“I’m glad you came to me, my son,” 

Jimin’s tinkling laugh echoes through the room and you manage a teary smile when you see his crescent shaped eyes. Deciding that you had heard enough, you tiptoe back to Taehyung’s room, shutting the door quietly before snuggling into the covers. You grin at all you’ve heard. So he does remember. He remembers you and he wants to be your friend. He regrets what he did. He’s still the same caring Jimin you’ve always known. You wouldn’t know that if it weren’t for Taehyung though. You shut your eyes and pretend to be fast asleep as you hear Taehyung shuffle into the room. A gentle tap to your shoulder makes you fake waking up. 

“Oh? TaeTae,” 

“Hey sweetness,” he mumbles, trying not to wake Namjoon. “You fell asleep after the movie. Do you have to get back home or do you wanna stay over?” 

“Can I stay?” you mutter. 

“‘Course you can,” 

Perhaps Taehyung was the best person on the fucking planet. 

This time you wake up to someone aggressively poking your cheek. You groan angrily, setting at the hand and you hear someone snigger. 

"Ah, her cheeks are all squishy haha," 

You open your eyes to seeing a familiar grin. 

"Shut up Jeon," you mumble. 

"You want some breakfast?" he asks, ignoring your comment. 

"(Name), if you want breakfast, you need to come get it or Hoseok's gonna eat it all," you hear Yoongi say from the doorway. 

"Aw, thanks for thinking of me, Yoongi," you grin as you sit up, trying to smooth down your hair. You see him smile lightly as he leaves and you stretch out the stiffness in your joints. 

After freshening up, you take a seat at the table in between Taehyung and Namjoon. 

"Did you sleep well?" Tae asks you, smiling gently. 

"Yeah, thanks TaeTae," you beam at him.

"This is the first time you're staying over right?" Namjoon asks and you smile with a nod. 

"Yeah sorry I just crashed here without saying anything," 

"How many times do I have to tell you that it's okay. Our house is your house now," Seokjin stresses which makes you grin. At that moment, Jimin joins the table, rubbing his eyes sleepily. 

"Morning Jiminie," Taehyung greets. Jimin grins at the fellow 95 liner, the two of them sharing a secret conversation. 

"Morning Taehyungie," he replies. You continue to stare at him, feeling embarrassed yet confident. Eventually, his warm chocolate eyes land on you. You hesitate, but give him the first real smile you have in a long time. He blinks, but slowly, a grin forms on his face. You can't help but flush under his smile, and you hurriedly shovel food into your mouth, fully aware of Taehyung cheeky smirk. 

"You heading home after this, (Name)?" Hoseok asks in the midst of his chewing. You swallow down your mouthful and nod. 

"Yeah, I have a paper to write and I wanted to call my parents too," 

Hoseok nods in agreement and you finish up the meal, listening to the boys bicker with a smile. After you finish, Taehyung walks you to the door, and watches you put on your boots. 

“So…” he says quietly, and you can hear the grin in his voice. “What’s up with you today?” 

“What do you mean?” you ask, though you know exactly what he means. 

“I mean you were all heart eyes at the table,” 

“Shut up Tae,” you snap, though he doesn’t take it seriously due to your smile. 

“OoOOoOo (Name)~” 

You snort at his childish behavior. “And you say you’re more mature than I am,” 

He continues his taunting. “But since when did you decide to--” 

“Since I heard everything your big mouth was saying last night,” and feeling satisfied with his shocked face, you wave goodbye and walk out the door. You hear him follow you out and ask “WAIT YOU HEARD?! YOU KNOW I DIDN’T MEAN ANY OF THAT RIGHT?!” 

You turn back over your shoulder and grin. “I KNOW! I LOVE YOU!!” 

His shoulder’s slump and he smiles lazily, knowing exactly what you are thanking him for. “Love you too,” 

***

Even though you’ve realized that you harbor some kind of feelings for Jimin, it doesn’t make it any easier to deal with them. What used to be nostalgia and sadness lingering around his name was now replaced with giddiness and unfamiliar butterflies. One thing that did remain was the sense of longing that you felt. While at first it was longing for that friendship you once had, now it was the longing to be more. Of course that couldn’t happen, not when you were able to see Jung Eunji kiss Park Jimin when he got home everyday. A part of you is so extremely jealous, but another part of you can only sigh because this was inevitable. There was no chance that Eunji was bad for him. On the contrary, she was quite perfect. So you can’t hate her at all and instead you can stand by with a bittersweet smile as the months pass by. But even so, all you can do is enjoy your time with your friends, just as you are doing now. 

“You need to date,” Jeongguk mutters to you. The neon lights in the room highlight his handsome facial features and shine in his youthful eyes. You stare at him blankly. “No offense,” 

“Um, I take full offense. Are you implying that I’m lonely?” 

“Yes,” the ravenette answers. You gasp dramatically, placing a hand on your chest. “You’ve been single all year! You need some action, babe,” he continues. 

“Uh huh, well if you can find me someone, let me know,” you chuckle with a shake of your head as you clink your glass with his before taking a sip. 

"Hm, what about the mysterious man who's had his eyes on you all night?" Jeongguk comments, his honey-like eyes flickering across the room. You follow his gaze and do indeed find dark eyes on you. You gulp, suddenly feeling self-conscious. 

"I don't know, Guk," you mumble honestly, letting your gaze roam to where Jimin is playfully dancing with Eunji. 

"Oh, why not? He looks like he's into you!!" Jeongguk whines, slapping your shoulder. "Why won't you look at someone for once?" 

I am looking at someone; you just don't know who.

"You need to forget about whoever you're still hung up on," the male says, placing a palm under his chin. “If it’s this Youngjae dude or someone else or whoever, you gotta forget about them because obviously, you aren’t getting anywhere with any of them,” 

You sigh, knowing that he’s right. Were you really going to stay hung up on Jimin, who is obviously in a happy relationship already? 

“Okay fine, you’re right,” 

Jeongguk smirks triumphantly before standing up. “Then I’ll leave you to it, (Name),” 

“What?! Wait!!” you desperately call after him, but he only flashes a mischievous grin before walking off in the direction of Hoseok and Namjoon. You groan, feeling awkward sitting by yourself. That doesn’t last for long though, because soon enough, the handsome stranger is standing in front of you. 

You don’t exactly know what spurred you to accept his invitations, but you end up laughing with him throughout the night. He keeps a respectable distance because he knows you’re a bit tipsy, which you can’t help but admire. The guy is extremely sweet and you know you’ve seen him before around school. He introduces himself as an Im Jaebum, a third year, and that confirms where you’ve seen him. You can actually see yourself being happy with him. Of course, that might just be your drunkenness and loneliness talking, but he is genuinely nice. By the end of the night, he walks you home, his deep chuckles ringing in your ear as you ramble on about something or the other without a care in the world. After he sweetly escorts you to your door, you fall into bed with a sweet smile, knowing that his digits are inputted into the memory of your phone. 

***

Two weeks later, you are lazily lounging at the boys’ dorm. You’re draped across the couch, your legs laying in Jeongguk’s lap, who, like usual, has his remote controller in his hands. You are grinning as you rapidly text Jaebum. You haven’t officially started dating him yet, but he has taken you out a few times, all of which you’ve enjoyed yourself to the core. You are biting your lip to conceal laughter as he rambles about his friend Jackson who won’t ever do what he’s told when Jimin gets home. The black-haired male groans in pain as he stretches out his muscles and plops into the single-seater. 

“Hey hyung,” Jeongguk greets. 

“Hey Gukkie. Hey (Name),” he replies. You tear your eyes away from your phone to smile at him, your heart still fluttering. “Hey Jimin,” 

Jeongguk and Jimin make small talk as you immerse yourself in your texting again. Taehyung eventually joins their conversation with a snack in his hand. It is only a few minutes later when Jeongguk speaks directly to you. 

“So I take it my plan went well?” he smirks with knowing eyes as you flush. 

“What plan?” Taehyung asks with a mouthful of chips. 

“What’s his name?” Jeongguk asks, ignoring his hyung’s inquiry. 

“Uhh, Im Jaebum,” you can’t help but smile when Jeongguk’s eyes widen. 

“Wait, that was Im Jaebum!! I’ve heard so much about him. He’s the one who’s really good at b-boying, right?” 

You grin and nod and Jeongguk chuckles proudly. “Total score, (Nickname). I’m so proud of you,” 

Taehyung sits up straight, his brows furrowed. “Wait...you mean you’re…?” 

“Dating,” Jeongguk finishes. Taehyung’s jaw drops, eyes flickering to you with confusion. 

“I was gonna tell you,” you say honestly. “And we aren’t dating yet. We just went out a few times,” 

Taehyung shoots you a look as though saying ‘you’d better explain all of this later.’ 

“Isn’t it great hyung? She’s been single since we met her. It’s time she gets a little romance,” Jeongguk grins as he continues clicking his controller. 

“Yeah, congrats (Name),” 

They are the first words Jimin utters in the conversation and when you look at him he is smiling at you, though it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. You feel a bit disappointed that he isn’t upset about it, but that’s just your stupid fantasy talking. You flash him a similar smile, one that you don’t quite mean. 

“Thanks, Jimin,” 

Taehyung is watching your exchange with observant eyes but he doesn’t say anything, though he looks like he really wants to. After that conversation ends, there is some kind of tension in the air that you cannot break. 

A few hours later, while Yoongi made dinner, Taehyung tugs you into his bedroom. 

“What the heck?” he whisper-shouts once he shuts the door. 

“What?” you ask dumbly. 

“Im Jaebum, (Name)? Really?” 

You cross your arms across your chest defensively. “What’s wrong with Jaebum?” 

Taehyung clicks his tongue exasperatedly. “Nothing’s wrong with him. Just...what happened to Jimin? I thought you liked him!” 

Your shoulders slump dejectedly. “I do! O-Or I did. I don’t know Tae!! I’m trying so hard to stop--” 

“What? Why?!” he asks. 

“Because,” you burst and his hands flinch at your volume. “He’s already with someone else! I’ve been pining after him all these years and now am I just supposed to sit by and be alone while he dates her?! Do you just expect me to stay stuck on him forever?! It’s obvious he doesn’t return my feelings so I’m trying to move on!!” 

Taehyung purses his lips, sympathy swirling around in his eyes. “Okay, you’re right. I just--as long as you’re happy with him, (Name),” he sighs, before giving you a sad smile and holds his arms open. You reciprocate and accept his invitation, wrapping your arms around him in desperate need of his affection. 

*** 

You can only sigh as you disconnect the call which catches the attention of the male sitting next to you. 

“Trouble in paradise?” Yoongi asks, looking down at you. You sigh yet again. 

“I don’t know…? It’s hard to explain,” you mumble. 

“Talk to me,” he says bluntly. You’ve known Yoongi long enough to tell that this was his invitation for you to dump your emotions on him, so you do just that. 

“It’s just---it feels forced,” you say, waving your hands around exasperatedly. At Yoongi’s hum, you continue. “I mean, I like Jaebum and all, but I feel like I’m not really putting my entire mind into this, y’know?” 

Yoongi nods mutely. “So you’re saying it’s one-sided?” 

“Well,” you try to explain. “I do have feelings for him. But I just feel like he’s more invested in this relationship than I am. And I want to be more invested!! I do! But I…” 

“You just don’t feel it?” the mint-haired male offers and you nod. 

“Yeah. And that makes me feel really bad. He’s such a good guy. He doesn’t deserve my bullshit,” 

“Then maybe you should...y’know? End it?” Yoongi advises, picking up a piece of chicken with his chopsticks and shoving it into his mouth. You look down sadly. 

“Yeah I probably will. I’m really going to miss him though,” you mumble. It’s weird to explain how you feel. On one hand, you absolutely adore Jaebum. He was the perfect guy and probably ideal for so many people. He was smart, funny, talented, and handsome. He’d done nothing but take care of you in the sweetest way possible and he’d been nothing but respectful and loving.  You feel horrible about the way you feel about him. You love him, but you hate the fact that your own mind betrays you. Instead of thinking of him 24/7, like any lovestruck fool would do, your mind wanders and lingers on the memories of the crescent eyed boy who really stole your heart. After so much thinking, you began to feel guilty, believing that you were betraying Jaebum in some way as you thought about Jimin. And here you were; Yoongi has to give you relationship advice. 

You are just picking up a piece of meat with your chopsticks when you hear the front door open. Jimin walks in, looking extremely tired. His big performance was now only a month away, which increased the time he spent practicing. 

“Hey Jimin,” you greet. His lips twitch upward into a tired smile. 

“Hey (Name),” 

Your reply is interrupted by Jimin’s bedroom door swinging open and out walks Eunji. She has her arms crossed with a disapproving glare. 

“Hey noona,” the black-haired male greets, but no answer comes from his girlfriend. She continues to look at him. “What?” 

“What?! Seriously? Park Jimin do you know what time it is?! It’s past 11 at night! Why are you just getting home now?!? It’s not good for you!” she explodes. It is the first time you’ve ever seen her yell, especially at Jimin. Though the male in question only seems to grow more tired as he hears her words. He sighs heavily as he begins walking towards his bedroom. 

“Noona I told you. My competition is in less than five weeks. I need to practice--”

“What about us? We agreed that we’d spend tonight together and you forgot--” Eunji starts complaining, her voice rising as she follows him. 

“No! I did not forget!! I specifically texted you and told you that I wouldn’t be able to go out tonight!” 

“You’ve been saying that a lot recently!! What? Is it that you don’t want to spend time with me?!” 

“God, noona, no! That’s not it!! I’m fucking sorry alright!” 

“Oh, great, sorry. The same exact thing you said last time….” her voice trails off as the door to Jimin’s shuts loudly. Their yells now turned into muffled sounds of aggravation. 

“Ugh again? That’s the third time this week!” Hoseok groans as he joins you and Yoongi at the table. 

“Are they doing okay?” you ask. You’ve never really tried to pry too deep into Jimin and Eunji’s relationship. It had been a bit sore of a subject for you since you found out. But you had never heard them fight like this. Eunji was always sweetly taking care of Jimin and he would always show her love in the cutest way possible. 

“To be honest, I’m not sure,” Yoongi sighs. “They’ve been pretty tense the past few weeks,” 

“Really? Why?” you ask, trying to keep your voice from sounding too nosy. Neither of the boys seem to notice though and Hoseok shrugs. 

“I don’t know. Last week, Eunji was saying something about how he’s pulling away from her and it isn’t really how it was when they started dating,” 

“But she probably just feels that way because Jimin is focusing so much on practicing right now,” Yoongi shrugs. “I mean we all know how he feels about dancing. He’s been preparing for this competition for a long time. He obviously wants to put his all into it,” 

“Yeah I can see why both of them are having problems,” Hoseok says. “It’s not like any of them are doing anything wrong. It’s just…” he trails off but you and Yoongi know what he means. You can’t help but feel a little bad. How could a happy relationship go so sour over such a thing? Then you remember your own predicament and wince. 

It takes you a week to finally break it off with Jaebum. It hurts to leave him, especially when you see the look on his face, but you can’t help but feel as though a weight has been lifted off of your shoulders. But you do still hurt….

“I just didn’t know what to do!” you blubber as Jeongguk rubs your shoulder. 

“It’s okay (Name). I understand,” 

From his spot on the couch, Hoseok sends you a sad sort of grimace and you can’t help but cry harder. 

“I-I really wanted to be with him, you know?” you sob as Jeongguk clicks his tongue sympathetically. 

"Yeah?" Hoseok asks. 

"Yeah," you cry. "He was perfect," 

"You know, sometimes fate is just mean like that. There's always going to be someone perfect like Jaebum that isn't meant for you," Jeongguk says wisely. 

"And how many relationships have you been in, Jeongguk?" Hoseok asks the bunny-like male. 

"That's not that point, hyung!!" Jeongguk protests. "The point is that sometimes relationships aren't meant to be. Don't worry, (Nickname). You'll end up with someone great!" 

You sniffle noisily and wipe your eyes with your sleeve. You're sure your nose is red and your face is puffy. 

“I guess. But I really miss him now!!” a fresh wave of tears starts again and you put your head in your hands. Through your fingers, you catch Yoongi holding back a snigger at your tantrum and you whine loudly, opting to chuck a pillow at him. 

“STOP LAUGHING AT ME!!” 

He chortles. “I’m sorry but you were so ready to do it and now you’re crying like a baby,” 

You try to hold back a smile at his tone because you know he’s just teasing. If you hadn’t told him how you felt about breaking up with Jaebum, you know he’d be more serious. But he knows that you feel relieved and so he thinks he’s entitled to make fun of you. 

“Shut up,” you mutter, swiping your sleeve under your eyes again. Seokjin, who had been silently playing Mario Kart, voices his opinion. 

“You’ll be fine, (Name). JK’s right. If it’s meant to be, then it’s meant to be. Stop crying now. You look ugly,” 

“EVeRYoNE hATeS mE!!” you sob, dramatically turning into Jeongguk’s shoulder as his body shakes with laughter. You hear Hoseok giggle and then some footsteps follow. 

“Finally. You always use all the fucking hot water,” Yoongi grumbles and you hear Jimin’s tinkling laugh. You look up to see him and when his eyes land on you, his happy expression morphs into shock. 

“Wha-? (Name) have you been crying?!” he asks, before swiftly walking closer to you. “What happened?! Are you hurt?!” 

You blink stupidly, trying to hide the real tracks of tears from your earlier episode. Though before you can answer, Jeongguk beats you to it. 

“Eh, yeah she is. She and Jaebum broke up,” he informs the elder male. Jimin stands up straight and his eyes flicker with confusion, surprise, and something else you can’t quite place. 

“Oh?” his voice goes into a higher pitch than it naturally is. He clears his throat. “W-Why?” 

Your mood instantly dampens as you think of the male you just gave up. You really did miss him. 

“I-” you can’t help but get choked up again. “I don’t know,” 

Immediately, anger flickers across Jimin’s face. “Wait...he didn’t fucking...dump you for some stupid reason did he?” 

You shake your head quickly. “No no! I broke up with him,” 

The ravenette’s anger fizzles. “Oh. Then why are you crying?” 

“I don’t know,” you repeat miserably. “I can’t explain it,” 

Jimin seems to understand what you want to say and nods sympathetically.

“It’s okay. It’ll get better soon,” 

You sigh heavily and sniffle before nodding. You would die before you admitted that just seeing Jimin had already made it a bit better. 

***

You attentively watch every step that Jimin takes. His movements switch from fluid to controlled in seconds, yet his face is lacking any struggle, almost as if this came easy to him. Though for you, you couldn’t stand on your own two feet, so the way he was dancing right now was extremely admirable. The occasional squeaks of his sneakers were drowned out by the music echoing through the room. Next to you, Taehyung and Hoseok are watching with rapt attention. When Jimin hit the final beat, all three of you began to clap and praise him. 

“Woahh that was really cool, Jiminie!”

“That was amazing!”

“It was much better than last time just make sure you keep your legs straighter when you go down at the end,” 

Jimin grins sheepishly and nods at Hoseok’s suggestion. He starts walking towards his bag and pulls out his water bottle for a sip. Taehyung turns to you. 

“Well, (Name)? What did you think of Jimin’s performance?” 

Out of the corner of his eye, you could see Jimin looking at you for your answer. “It was so good. I wish I could dance like that,” you compliment honestly. Jimin’s lips twitch upwards at your words, but he doesn’t say anything. Taehyung looks satisfied before a mischievous glint takes place in his eyes. 

“I’m gonna go buy something for us to eat,” he says, standing up and dusting off his clothes. Your eyes widen. 

“I don’t wanna eat right no-” Jimin starts but his friend cuts him off. 

“Shut up, Jimin,” he scolds. “You have to get your energy back!” 

Taehyung grins at you; he was really trying to put you in an uncomfortable spot, huh? He then exits the practice room and you huff angrily. Well, at least Hoseok was still here. 

“HEY HOBI HYUNG!! CAN YOU COME WITH ME?! 

Oh no…

The male in question clicks his tongue. “What?!” 

“I DON’T KNOW WHERE TO BUY FOOD!!” Taehyung yells, poking his head into the room

“Ugh~” Hoseok groans, before standing up. “I’ll be back guys,” 

You shoot Taehyung a look of desperation, but all you get back is a wink and the door swings closed. You sigh as the room becomes silent. Jimin is grinning lightly when you look at him. 

“I’m happy you liked the dance, (Name),” he smiles and you feel your shoulders relax. His words didn’t help your sweaty palms though. 

“Of course I did! It was awesome!!” 

Jimin grins at your answer, a slight hue of pink dusting his cheeks. Though you can’t help yourself from rambling further. 

“I mean, if only I could do that!! It’s so amazing how you can dance so effortlessly. Like, it looks like you don’t even have to think about what you’re doing! You’re probably the best dancer I’ve ever met. Well, you and Hoseok. But you’re still so talented! You know, even when we were younger I used to be jealous of your dancing skills?! And it’s not fair! You looked so cool doing it!!” 

By the time you realized that you hadn’t stopped talking, all of your words were spilled into the air. While internally cursing yourself for your running mouth, Jimin’s blush deepens. 

“Aw,” he smiles. “Thanks, (Nickname),” 

The syllables of your nickname as they escape his lips makes your heart race and you smile back at him, ignoring the dampness of your palms. Though neither of you utter a word for the next few moments, you are fine just looking at him. He is about to speak when the practice door swings open. You turn to send a signal to Taehyung that everything was going well, but your shoulders drop when you see Eunji standing there instead. She isn’t angry or anything, but she doesn’t look too happy either. You steal a glance at the clock and realize that it was now hitting 12:30 in the morning. She seems to be aware of that as well. 

Jimin’s smile drops slightly. “Hey noona,” 

“You’ve been here this whole time?” she asks in a low voice. Jimin nods. 

“Jimin,” she sighs, her body slumping with some kind of unseen weight. “Jimin I’ve been calling you all evening,” 

“Oh shit,” Jimin curses. “Really? I’m so sorry noona. My phone was off and in my ba--” 

“Jimin,” she raises a hand to silence him. “You could have told me. I was waiting at your dorm all night,” 

It is then that her eyes drift to see you sitting against the wall and they narrow. It is the first time you’ve seen an expression like that on her and you want nothing more than to press yourself into the wall and disappear. 

“I’m really sorry, noona,” he sincerely apologizes again, walking closer to her. “My mind has just been so occupied with this competition and I--” 

“Let’s talk later, okay? I’m going home,” she says icily, stepping away from him. Jimin doesn’t make a move to stop her from leaving. Before she leaves, she looks at you once again and you feel a chill run up your spine at the look that is remarkably like a glare. Once she leaves, the atmosphere becomes tense, no more the fluttery air that was just present moments ago. You sneak a glance at Jimin, who looks defeated. He runs his hands through his black locks and when he catches your eyes, he manages to send you a gentle smile. 

“It’ll be fine, Jimin,” you offer, no matter how much it stings to say. “It’ll all be okay,” 

“Yeah, it’ll be fine,” he repeats, though it sounds more like he is convincing you than convincing himself. 

***

You shove a spoonful of Rocky Road into your mouth as you watch Taehyung sign into Netflix on your computer. You both are alone at your dorm tonight since Sana is visiting her parents for the weekend. You both enjoyed spending free time with each other and since you had finished most of the work you had and you didn’t have your part-time job, Taehyung was the obvious option. He plops on your bed and snatches the tub of sweetness away from you, to which you protest but are ultimately ignored. 

Though Taehyung seems a little off today. He isn’t chattering your ear off about something or the other and his hands are fidgeting a lot. 

“Hey TaeTae?” you ask, looking at him. 

He flinches and you start. “Hm? Oh yeah what?” he asks absent-mindedly. 

“You okay?” you frown. “You’ve been kind of...jumpy?” 

“Oh,” he shakes his head and smiles lightly. “Yeah I’m fine,” 

You’re not quite convinced, but you decide not to push him and instead focus on the screen as Us starts playing. You don’t notice Taehyung bite his lip and look at you with a bit of guilt. As the movie progresses, there are multiple instances when he opens his mouth to speak, but can’t manage to get words out. It takes him about half the movie, but eventually can’t control himself. He stretches across the bed to pause the movie and you look up at him quizzically. 

“I have to tell you something,” he says quietly. And then he starts. “Yesterday, I was at the dorm…” 

Taehyung lazily lounged on the couch, his hand digging into a bag of Cheetos as he lethargically watched Supernatural on TV. The dorm was pretty quiet this evening, he noticed. Yoongi and Namjoon were in their rooms working on music while Seokjin had gone to visit his brother. Surprisingly, you and Jeongguk were out eating together, with the latter having to pay after losing a bet to you. And not so surprisingly, Jimin and Hoseok were at the studio. So here he was. 

He didn’t really know how many episodes he had breezed through, but he was in the middle of choking on his laughter as Castiel yells “Hey assbutt!” when Jimin gets home. 

“Oh hey Jimini--” he paused when he saw Jimin’s somber expression. “What’s wrong?” 

Jimin looked up and smiled lightly before heading off to his room. “Oh nothing, I’m just really tired,” 

Taehyung knew that that wasn’t it, but he didn’t push his friend, and turned back to Dean’s appalled face. A few minutes later, he hears Jimin shuffling around in the kitchen as he makes dinner for himself before he walks into the living room and plops down next to him. 

“So…” Jimin asks, after a few minutes of watching Sam and his glorious hair. “Where is everyone?” 

“Yoongi hyung and Namjoon hyung are working. You know Jin hyung’s visiting his brother. And Jeongguk went out to eat with (Name),” Taehyung replies. Jimin turns to look at him quickly. 

“(Name) and Jeongguk?”  he repeats. Taehyung raises a brow and nods slowly. “L-Like on…..are they on a date?”

Taehyung reels back, his lips curling a bit. “What no! What is wrong with you?! He lost a bet so he’s taking her out and paying!” 

Jimin’s shoulders fall and he sighs a bit. “Oh okay,” he chuckles awkwardly. “Sorry, I was just checking,” 

Taehyung frowns, but slowly nods, before he focuses back on the show. “So how was practice? Is Hobi hyung still there?” 

Jimin nods in the middle of his munches. “Yeah. I’m getting pretty nervous about this now that it’s so close,” 

“Nah, you’ll be fine. You’re a great dancer. Just do your best,” Taehyung answers. It is silent for a minute, the two brother-like friends watching the show with interest before Taehyung poses a question. “Oh I wanted to ask. We’re all gonna go to Taeyong’s party tomorrow. You up for it?” 

“Who’s we all?” Jimin asks, turning to face him. 

“The hyungs, except for Jin hyung, me, and Gukkie,” 

“And (Name)?” Jimin asks. Taehyung stops to think, though it is a bit curious that Jimin keeps bringing you up. 

“I haven’t asked her. I could text her and see. I think she’d probably come,”  

“Okay, sure,” Jimin agrees, taking another bite of his dinner. 

“You can bring Eunji, too,” Taehyung says. But Jimin stiffens. 

“Uh, I don’t think she’d wanna come,” he answers. Taehyung blinks. 

“Why?” he pauses. “Oh. Because you’ve been kinda fighting lately? It’s okay. You can take her to the party to show her that you still wanna be with her. You know, spend time with her,” 

Jimin grimaces. “That sounds great and all but I really don’t think she’d agree,” Taehyung chuckles. “Why not?” 

“Because I broke up with Eunji,” 

There is a pause in the conversation. 

“What?” Taehyung asks. 

“I broke up with Eunji,” Jimin repeats. 

“Wha-? Why?” 

“I….” he sighs, as though unable to form words. “I don’t know man. You know how you always say that you break up with the girls you date because you don’t....”

“Love them?” Taehyung offers and Jimin nods miserably. 

“I mean I cared about Eunji, I really did. But like I don’t feel like I wanna be with her anymore. It feels like I’m forcing myself to be with her. And I didn’t want to do that because it was obviously hurting her!” 

Taehyung nods understandingly. “Yeah I get that. It’s okay. How do you feel? Are you okay?” 

Jimin winces. “I feel...really guilty. And kinda sad too. But I also feel like I did the right thing for her,” 

“I’m sure you did. As long as you’re happy, Jimin,” Taehyung smiles gently, turning back to the screen. For a second he thinks of you. He thinks of how long you’ve been pining after Jimin. He wants to tell you, he really does, but he doesn’t want to give you any false hope. He doesn’t want you to waste your time longing for Jimin if there was no chance to begin with. That’s why, internally, he debates on whether he had the right to tell you, or if you should hear it from Jimin himself.

“Thanks for everything, Taehyungie,” 

“He and Eunji...broke up?” you ask incredulously. Taehyung nods, biting his bottom lip gently. “Aw TaeTae. Why were you so nervous about that?” 

“I just didn’t want to have you be stuck on him, you know? I don’t know. I was trying to figure out if it was my place to tell you,” he answers honestly. Though you only smile up at him before nuzzling into his side. 

“Thanks for always thinking of me, Tae,” you sigh, though you can’t quell that spark of hope that has ignited in your chest. You feel him squeeze your shoulders and in his sweet voice he replies

“Of course, (Nickname),”

You continue to watch without a care in the world but Taehyung still feels guilt in his gut. Because he had left out the next part of the conversation. And he wasn’t sure if that part could benefit you or break your heart. 

After a few minutes, Taehyung asks the question in his head. “If you don’t mind me asking, when did you start feeling that way about Eunji? I mean, like you didn’t love her?” 

“Um,” Jimin licks his lips. “I think a few months ago? I just hated how she’d always be disappointed in me for not calling her and stuff,” 

“Ah got it,” Taehyung answers. “I guess that’s why you both started fighting too,” 

“Yeah…” Jimin trails off. Another beat of silence passes before he speaks up again. “I…” 

Taehyung turns to look at him. “What?” 

“I think it’s also because…” he pauses. “Because I have feelings for someone else,” 

Jimin refused to tell Taehyung who it was. But as he said, it could benefit you if the person was you, and if it wasn’t, it would break your heart. 

And Taehyung wasn’t sure if he wanted to take that risk.

***

“What time will you be back again?” Sana asks you as she watches you brush your hair. After you’re sure you’ve got all the tangles out, you place the brush down and turn to her. 

“To be honest I’m not sure. I think the actual competition ends at eight but it might run longer. Plus, Jin said I could just crash at their place if it goes on too late,” you answer. “I’ll text you anyway,” 

“Got it,” she grins. In just a few minutes, a rapt knock sounds from your door and stand up. When you pull it open, Yoongi stands there with Namjoon. 

“Ready to go?” Namjoon asks, his dimples showing up as he smiles down at you. You nod eagerly. 

“Then hurry your ass up and let’s go,” Yoongi mumbles, though he is slightly smiling. You roll your eyes and yell out a goodbye to your roommate, before shutting the door behind you. Following the two music lovers out, they lead you to the car. Namjoon pulls the door open as Yoongi goes to take a seat next to Seokjin in the front. Reciprocating the greetings you get from the boys, you comfortably seat yourself between Hoseok and Jeongguk as the car starts. Though the boys continue to chatter with each other, or occasionally bicker, you can’t help but glance at Jimin, who has been silent the whole ride. He stares out the window dazedly and his leg bounces nervously. Namjoon seems to notice this as well, as he places a comforting hand on the male’s knee. 

“You’re gonna be fine, Jimin,” he says.

“Yeah, you’ve practiced so much! It’s all gonna pay off!” Hoseok adds, brightening up the mood with his cheeriness as he always does. Jimin only shuts his eyes, blows out a breath, and nods. You offer him a smile when he catches your eye, and he shakily grins back. In another half an hour, all of you clamor out of the car in front of the place of the competition. 

“I have to go with all the other performers,” Jimin says to all of you. “You guys go through the front with all the people who came to watch,” 

“Got it,” Seokjin answers before breaking out into a smile. “Good luck, Jiminie!”

The other boys hug him and clap him on the back and smack his ass (Jeongguk) but he smiles gratefully at all of them. 

“Good luck, Jiminie,” you wish him with a smile before glomping him in a hug. Though it has been years, you can’t help but remember how it used to feel to hug him before something important. When you were younger, you used to think hugs would give him good luck, so now also, you’d like to believe that they would do something for him. You feel his hands gently squeeze you back before he lets you go. When you look at him, he is grinning at you, his chocolate eyes stretched in pretty crescents and that has you wanting to explode but you push away the butterflies and turn away from him, though you cannot stop smiling. You know he’ll be amazing. 

***

The car ride home is loud and rambunctious, just as one would expect from the seven boys who had stolen your heart. The chattering amongst you all doesn’t cease, even as Jimin flusteredly begs you all to stop. 

“Did you see the way he flipped?!” Jeongguk asks eagerly before making excessive hand gestures to accompany his words. “He was all WPAPPAPAAAAHH and then he landed so smoothly!!”  

“Yeah that was awesome!! But what about that part where he went into the splits and then got up without using like any of his hands?!” you squeal. “That was easily the coolest thing I’ve ever seen in my life!!” 

“Ah c’mon guys,” Jimin whines with a blush, though he is grinning sheepishly. “You can stop now~” 

“And he was really hitting every beat! That was really well done,” Hoseok nods sagely as he effectively ignores Jimin’s request. Jimin only sighs with a shake of his head, leaning back into his seat with a smile as the moonlight hits the glinting gold medal around his neck. As soon as you all barge into the apartment, everyone plops into a couch or on the floor. Yoongi pulls out drinks for everyone and you all clink them together to celebrate Jimin’s victory. It is one of the best days you have with the boys, feeling now worries or stresses and nothing but happiness. 

“Dude,” Jeongguk slurs, his beer sloshing around as he motions towards Jimin. “All those nights in the s-studio really paid off~~~”

“Yeah,” Taehyung agrees, his face turning extremely serious as he looks at his friend, totally unaware that he too is tipsy. “If Eunji could see you now!” 

Jimin, who is now sporting a light flush, looks at you quickly before looking away. You quickly turn back to your karaoke and began to sing excessively. 

“Even though she was a nice girl, you shouldn’t date someone if they come in the way of your dreams!” Namjoon nods wisely. He is holding the handle of a mug from the coffee table, which he had somehow broken off. 

“wHAt wISE woRdS!!” Hoseok suddenly shrieks from his position across the carpet, having even less control over his volume than usual. 

“Yeah I’m glad I ended it. I hope she’s happy~” Jimin smiles, his cheeks pink as he speaks. 

“You’re a mature guy for thinking so,” Yoongi says, sipping his wine and remaining the only one who knew how to handle his alcohol. He watches you and Seokjin loudly shriek to Fantastic Baby with a playful roll of his eyes. You all continue to pass the time with drinks, karaoke, and occasional remembrance of the beautiful performance you had witnessed earlier that evening. After Jeongguk’s very extra reenactment of Jimin’s dance, you stand up and stretch. 

“I should probably head back to the dorm,” you mumble. Seokjin, red in the face, laughs dramatically. 

“Girl, you can’t even stand on your own two feet,” he slurs and Jimin giggles loudly. You stick your tongue out and pull your sweater on. 

“You’re just extra drunk,” you point out and begin walking towards the door. You smile at Jimin, who is watching you go. 

“You did really well today, Jimin,” you whisper with tipsy smile. You really want to talk with him more, but you feel your nerves kick in and you settle with just seeing his pretty smile. 

“Thanks (Name),” 

You slip your sneakers on and wave dramatically to the boys. “See you guys later!” 

“Please don’t pass out on the way!” Yoongi yells after you, even though he knows you aren’t that drunk and can walk for fifteen minutes. You grin at the mint-haired musician and walk out the door. 

You are smiling as you step out into the warm summer air. A successful night for the boy you are obsessed with sits well with you, and having spent time with him and seeing him happy makes you happy in turn. You cross the street and are just about to continue your walk when you hear someone shout your name. You turn around to see Park Jimin standing at the door, a wide smile on his flushed face. 

“(NAME)!!” 

“WHAT?!” you yell back, thinking you must have forgotten something. 

“I NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING!” he cups his hands by his lips to amplify the sound of his voice.

“WHAT IS IT?” you ask. You see him take a deep breath and smile. 

“I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I NEVER FORGOT ABOUT YOU AND I NEVER HATED YOU!! I ALWAYS MISSED OUR FRIENDSHIP AND I’M SO GLAD THAT WE GOT TO MEET EACH OTHER AGAIN!” 

You take a second to process his words before you break out into a happy smile. You open your mouth to tell him how glad you are to hear this, but he beats you to it. 

“BUT-” he says suddenly and you stop. “I CAN’T BE YOUR FRIEND LIKE WE WERE IN MIDDLE SCHOOL!” 

Your smile slowly drops, the beginning of a familiar sadness building up in your chest. 

“W-WHY?” you curse your voice crack, but await his answer. 

“BECAUSE-” he laughs loudly and you hear Hoseok scream from the hall: 

“TELL HER JIMIN!”

“BECAUSE I DON’T THINK I SEE YOU AS A FRIEND ANYMORE!!” he shouts and you pause. Suddenly, you fear the absolute worst, thinking that he does not want anything to do with you, that he doesn’t want to relive the friendship you once had. But then you hear Hoseok’s cheering and Namjoon’s praises and you start to think about what you just heard. 

“I-WHAT?” is all you can manage to yell back. You hear Jimin’s tinkling laugh and you can tell that he is embarrassed, but he is happy. He runs his fingers through his black hair and grins widely as Taehyung runs up to the door. 

“YOU WHAT?!” you hear the male yell, and Jimin laughs sheepishly. “SHE’S THE GIRL?!” 

Jimin nods mutely, though he is biting his plump lips to keep from smiling. You want to ask “what girl?” and “what are you talking about?” but you feel like your brain is short-circuiting. You hear Taehyung’s laugh of disbelief as he claps Jimin on the shoulder. “THEN WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! GO!!” 

Jimin, empowered by the bit of alcohol running through his veins and his friend’s encouragement, stumbles down the street and makes his way to you. When he stands in front of you, eyes and smile soft like honey, you forget how to blink. You are far too concerned with taking in every single facial feature of the beautiful man in front of you. His pretty hands slowly move to cup your neck and you hold your breath. His chocolate eyes are half-lidded, though they search for permission from you. You aren’t exactly sure how you give it to him, but he takes a leap of faith and connects his lips to yours. You won’t ever be able to explain your emotions at that moment, but all you can feel is Jimin. It takes you a few seconds to respond, but when you do, you do so wholeheartedly. You quickly close the space between you two and tangle your fingers in his dark hair feeling as though gravity ceased to exist. He seems to be enjoying himself just as much and he moves his hands to circle your waist and pull you closer to him. You can faintly hear Taehyung and Jeongguk faking gags but you can’t even bother yourself to care. Not when the boy of your childhood has completely stolen your heart. Maybe it’s a few minutes, or a couple of hours, or perhaps even a day has passed; you’re not sure. But when he pulls away from you his dazzling smile is so bright you can’t help but chuckle. He noses your cheek with a soft laugh and intertwines his fingers with yours. 

“You should text Sana,” he mumbles lowly, though you can hear the happiness in his voice. 

“Should I?” you ask back, closing your eyes in his embrace, feeling once again like a schoolgirl. He confirms with a gentle hum as he tugs you in the direction of the house. You lazily stumble after him, your legs feeling like jelly and butterflies actively fluttering in your gut. You watch him with loving eyes agreeing that he had never looked more handsome than in that moment. As Jimin pulls you into the apartment, Yoongi chuckles lowly. 

“It’s about time,” Jeongguk says and Hoseok grins with an excited nod of his head. 

“You knew?” you ask the two of them before it dawns on you. You slowly turn to glare at the tall male who hasn’t spoken. 

“I DIDN’T TELL THEM!” Taehyung yells at you, offended that you would even assume such a thing. 

“Wait...you knew?!” Jimin suddenly asks, looking at his fellow 95 liner, who gulps. 

“Well...yeah,” Taehyung answers and he immediately puts his hands up at Jimin’s glare. “Oh c’mon! She trusted me. I wasn’t about to go tell you that she had a crush on you!!” 

You grin and latch onto Taehyung’s arm. “Thanks TaeTae. I knew you were my best friend!” 

Jimin’s glare extends to you and you laugh. “That’s my best friend, woman,” 

“Hell no,” you shoot back and stick out your tongue. “You don’t deserve such a handsome best friend,” 

Taehyung nods appreciatively and high fives you but Namjoon smirks. 

“No matter how close you and Taehyung are you’ll never be as close as you and Jimin, (Name),” he comments before making smooching noises. Taehyung and Hoseok chortle and Yoongi’s smirk rivals Namjoon’s. You groan in embarrassment and sneak a peek at your lover, but he is only smiling with a shake of his head. His hand squeezes yours and you grin giddily. You suddenly hear footsteps and see Seokjin walking out of the bathroom. 

“Oh, (Name)? I thought you left? Did you forget something?” he asks, and when you all say nothing, he raises a brow. “What’d I miss?” 

The six of you blink and then Jeongguk utters a “Hyung how do you always miss the important stuff?” 

Namjoon and Hoseok crack up and you giggle as you watch Jeongguk dramatically recount the tale to an astonished Seokjin. You feel a nudge from your left and look to see Jimin grinning down at you. For a moment, his smile is so clearly the one you remember and it makes you feel a good kind of nostalgia. The Jimin you once knew wasn’t really gone. In fact the Jimin that you see next to you had grown from a cute boy to a loving man who had captured your heart once again. 

Whether he was four years old, eight years old, sixteen years old, or twenty years old, Jimin had your heart. And that would never change.

.

.

.

.

a/n: so maybe i just wanted some drama and angst. but I hope you guys liked it!!

[jungshookz]

*kicks open door* kiNDERGARTEN TEACHER!TAEHYUNG THAT HAS A FAT CRUSH ON THE HOT SINGLE MOM HE SEES WHEN SHE COMES TO PICK UP HER CUTEASS KID

→ pairing: kim taehyung x reader

→ genre: kindergartenteacher!taeHYUNG aka THE FLUFFIEST FLUFF like i don’t think i’ve ever felt so SOFT in my entire life great googly moogly please prepare yourselves 

→ wordcount: 3.3k

(gif isn’t mine!)

“shit shit shit shIt shit” you curse to yourself as you vEEr right into the first parking spot you see

you immediately crank the brake and unbuckle your seatbelt

“i was going to park there, asshole!” you hop out of the car to see an angry looking mother glaring at you from her minivan and you give her a sheepish smile

“i’m sorry!!!! my kid just got off from class and i can’t be late because i need to drive her to ballet and-“ you’re definitely oversharing with this stranger and she obviously doesn’t care because she rolls her eyes and flips you off before zoOming off to find another parking spot

soccer moms are so aggressive

you double check that you have everything with you and you fish your parent lanyard out of your backpack and sling it around your neck quickly as you approach the front doors

you thought that once you became a mother you would instantly become more responsible more organised more matuRe

obviously you were mistAken because you’re still late to almost everything you go to

some things never change!!!!

you hurry your way down the hallway and pick up the pace when you see the swarm of parents standing outside the classroom

as you approach the crowd you get up on your tip-toes to see if emma’s been excused yet

you accidentally bump into a couple and a bit of your coffee splashes onto their shoulders and they turn around and give you a dirty look

“oh, sorry!!!! ….fridays, am i right?” you joke and they both scowl before shuffling to stand somewhere else

oof

tough crowd

none of the parents here like u that much

which is a real shame because you think you make greAt company

you’re just,.,, there’s a big age gap between u and most of the parents here

you’re one of the younger parents in the class

actually you might be the youngest

min yoongi and his wife (you forgot her name whoOps) are pretty young but they’re still a couple years older than you

and side note their daughter is adoraBle

emma is actually friends with hwayoung so you talk to yoongi sometimes

it’s nice to talk to someone who’s around your age

he’s just veRy businessman-y so it’s difficult to joke around with him

but he’s still a nice guy!!

speaking of yoongi and hwayoung

a bright smile makes its way onto your face when you see yoongi nudging hwayoung through the crowd of people before grabbing onto her small hand

“yoongi!” yoongi looks up and he smiles politely

he’s still dressed all spic and span in his suit from work

“ah! good afternoon, y/n. hwayoung, say good afternoon to auntie.” he hums before bending down to zip up her backpack that’s just wiDe open

relatable

“good afternoon, auntie!!” she looks up at you with bright eyes

she’s sO CuTE

“hi, hwayoung-ie!” you bend down and pinch her cheek before reaching into the pocket of your coat and fishing out a little caramel “don’t tell your dad,” you joke and yoongi snorts in response

“thank u!!!!!” she snaTches it immediately and you coo before pinching her cheek again

you get back up onto your feet “you guys on your way home now?”

“mhm. is emma still available for a playdate this sunday?” yoongi swoops hwayoung off her feet and props her up onto his hip and she immediately rests her head against his shoulder

“affirmative, sir.” you salute and yoongi rolls his eyes playfully “i-“

“emma y/l/n?” you perk up when you hear emma’s name being called

“yeah, we’ll see you sunday! have a nice night!” you turn to squeeze your way into the crowd and once you make your way to the front your heart immediately starts going boom-boom because

it’s taehyung

emma’s teacher

kim taehyung is uh

whOo

putting it simply he is a very attractive man and he’s only a couple months older than you so like you’re preTTY sure this is god’s way of telling you it’s meant to be

the only time you’ve really talk to him is during the parent-teacher conference and even theN you can barely get a word in because emma’s a little chatterbox (one time she almost let it slip that ‘mommy dressed extra pretty for you!’ and you were literally about to pounce on your child in the middle of a classroom)

he’s really sweet n nice and when he smiles that boxY grin you can’t help but smile aNd he’s endearingly dorky and super charming aND funny and he’s so good with the kids and OH my god his voice is like..,., silky smooth dark chocolate.,,.,. rich caramel.,, that u want to driZZLE all over your BODY

okay no R-rated thoughts when there are children present don’t be weird

since he’s your kid’s teacher so you’re not sure if that’s even allowed

the whole parents dating teachers thing

anyways

he looks so soft today

he’s wearing a crisp button up with a pair of jeans

he obviously let the kids mess with his hair because he has a little sproUT in his hair

and you’re pretty sure you have a glasses kink because you’ve never felt this way when seeing someone with their glasses sitting on the top of their head

“hi, yeah, that’s me- i mean, that’s not me, but that’s my child- you know what i mean” you blow a strand of hair away from your face before adjusting your backpack with a sheepish grin

woW what the hell was that lol  

taehyung presses his lips together to keep himself from bursting into chuckles

you’re so awkward sometimes but he supposes that’s just part of your charm

he wants to tell you you look real cute in your periwinkle sweater

and it’s endearing how the laces on your converse shoes are undone

no doubt from your frantic running down the hallway (he notices everything)

but of course he has to keep it professional because you are the parent of one of his students it doesn’t matTer that you’re the same age as him and that he’s very very very veRY attracted to you

“hi miss y/l/n.” taehyung smiles kindly before ticking next to your name on the clipboard “emma’ll be ready in a minute! we did finger-painting today so the kids are taking a little longer to wash up. how was your day?” he suddenly remembers the little ponYTAIL in his hair and he yanks the hair tie off quickly

“oh, y’know, the usual. i don’t know why i thought it’d be a good idea to keep studying after four whole years of studying.” you snort before pulling your own hair tie from your ponytail and letting your hair down

“i admire that! education is important.” taehyung hums

your hair looks so soft

it probably smells good too

o god he’s being creepy stop being creepy

“i suppose you’re right. what else happened…uh… had a really good caramel macchiato and a mediocre turkey sandwich for lunch-“  

“mommy!” you snap out of your little trance when emma suddenly ziPs out of the classroom

her little backpack bounces against her back

“hi baby!” you grin and swoOp down to scoop her up into your arms

you smoosh kisses against her chubby cheek while she giggles away before you plop her back down onto the ground

it takes everything within taehyung not to mELT into the ground because even tho he sees you do that basically every day it never fails to turn him into a pile of mush IT’S SO CUTE

“we finger-painted today!” she cheers and holds her paper up for you to look at

“yeah, mr kim was just telling me-“

“that’s me, n that’s you, n that’s mr. kim!” she grins and points to the third figure in the painting and almost immediately bOTH yours and tae’s faces go bright red

you think you might actually be on fire right now (even tho this isn’t the first time this has hAPPENeD) ((ur referring to the time the class made play-doh people and emma made one of you and one of tae and the play-doh versions of you two are holding hands))

“oh! that’s, heh, uh, that’s nice! that’s so good, you did a good job, baby” you clear your throat and your eyes flicker over to taehyung

he tilts his head and offers you a meek smile

“will you put it up on the fridge when we go home?” she asks as you tuck it into her backpack for her before ziPping her bag up

“mhm…” you get back up onto your feet and dust your knees off “say g’bye to mr. kim”

“bye mr. kim!” emma turns around and hugs his legs

her face is like on the same level as his knees so he’s basically kneeing her and are u an awful mother if you kinda laughed at that

“goodbye, sweetheart!” he replies with the same level of enthusiasm as he gets down onto his knees so that he can give her a proper hug and she gives him a sweet lil kiss on the cheek “have a nice weekend, hm?” his eyes flicker up to you and you feel your heart skip a beat 

emma pulls away from him and skips over to you 

“oh, and don’t forget to tie your laces, emma.” taehyung hums as he gets back up onto his feet 

you look down because you remember putting emma in slip-on converse this morning not- 

“he means you, mama.” emma not-so-subtly whispers and you look down at your undone laces before looking back up at taehyung who’s looking very amused at the moment 

there it is again 

that fuzzy feeling in your stuPid heart 

u know what you have to get over it because it’s never going to happen 

you’re an adult 

you can get over it fine 

you’ll be finE 

this is just a silly little crush

“how do you feel about spaghetti and garlic bread for dinner?” you clutch emma’s little hand in yours as you guys make your way down the empty hallway

“yummy! with extra cheese?”

“it wouldn’t be as yummy without the extra cheese… but we obviously have to go to our usual place to get a hot chocolate first…” you’re rambling on and on about hot chocolate but emma isn’t really paying attention

because she has concocted a sneaky plan in that tiny brain of hers

she knows you like mr. kim

and she’s positive mr. kim likes you back

you always get so red around him

and he always gets so red around you

and red is the colour of love

which means that you must love mr. kim and mr. kim must love you

and she’s been trying her hardest to try and get you guys to hold hands or touch butts or whatever it is grown-ups do to prove they love each other

but each time she does something she’s never successful!!!

she tried to tell mr. kim about you dressing extra pretty for him but you smacked a hand over her mouth before she could get it out

she made a play-doh mommy and a play-doh mr. kim and presented them proudly to you and mr. kim and the both of you just laUGHED in hER FACE

do you people think she’s just a SIMPLE F O O L

and she has to admit the painting of you and her and mr. kim is probably one of her weaker moves but it’s better than nothing

and u know what

she just wants you to be happy

because she loves you a lot

and you’re a good mommy

and good mommies deserve to be happy

SO

this next part is all part of her evil plan and she’s positive that this time something will happen

all of her peers (including herself) have their own cubbies in the classroom

emma purposely left her snack box in there so that you’d have a reason to go back

AND she left a little note in there for you and (hopefully) mr. kim to read

emma is your child after all

meaning she’s a very verY clever girl

she just has to wait for the right time.,.,.

and the right time is noW

“mommy, my snack box is still in the classroom!!” emma stops in her tracks and you nod before pointing to the direction of the classroom

“go ahead, go get it”

“but i need to pee.” she squeezes her legs together and makes a face of discomfort “you need to get the snack box, mommy”

“i-“ you look back at the closed door of the classroom “mommy can wait for you to finish peeing and then you can go-“

“no, no, you need to go get it i need to pEE” the next thing you know she’s spRInting towards the washroom and you’re left standing in the middle of the hallway with question marks floating around your head

what in the hickory ham is going on

“gO GET MY SNACK BOX MOMMY” you hear her voice echo from the washroom

“alRIght alright” you snort before turning and heading back to the classroom

you don’t know why you’re suddenly so nervous

you’re retrieving your daughter’s snack box from her super attractive teacher that you definitely have a crush on there’s nothing to be nervous about

hi tae! emma left the ol’ snack box up in here!

whaddup mr. kim! mind if i just pOP right in??

yo Yo yOOoo have u seen a purple box anywhere?? because it belongs to emma and i need it

o god

all of these options are terrible

you need more time to rehearse your lines-

you’re about to reach up to knock on the door when suddenly it swiNgs right open and you stumble back in surprise

“oh shit!” taehyung reaches out and grabs onto your waist before you can fall flat on your aSS and you let out a squeak

in the midst of your almost-fall you’d grabbed onto his bicep and now.,.., he has an arm…, wrapped around your waist.,., while you have one hand on his bicep and one hand curled around the nape of his neck.,,,..,.,

the two of you snap out of your respective trances when you hear a door open down the hallway and you immediately leT GO of each other

also tae was right ur hair does smell really nice

“hi. sorry about that! i was on my way to the washroom and i didn’t know you were outside…” he clears his throat and prays to god he’s not as red as a tomato right now

“no, no! it was my bad, i’m sorry.” you reach up and scratch the back of your neck “i, uh, emma said she left her snack box in here.” you breathe out

“oh, uh, come in! i’ll help you search for it. it’s probably in her cubby. she’s always leaving things in there.” taehyung falls back into his ‘mr. kim’ persona as he leads you towards the cubbies in the back “let’s see… emma… here~” he bends down and you follow suit

oh my go d he even smells good is this aLLOWed

you perk up when you spot emma’s box

“hey, you’re right! here it is-“ you reach in and grab the box but you’re surprise when you notice the piece of paper stuck to the back of it

it’s an A4 piece of paper with a little card stuck to it and a note written in crayon on it

you recognise the card

it’s the business card of that little cafe you take emma to every friday after school

the one that you’re supposed to take her to right noW

‘mommy’s faveriate drink is karomal makkiatoe and mr. kim’s faverieote drink is hot chalklate’

“huh.” both you and tae are kinda just staring at the note

the gears are click-click-clicking away in both your guys’ heads

and then it hits the both of you at the same time

oh.

oh.

taehyung isn’t typically a ballsy guy but like

he’s feeling vEry brave all of a sudden

“can i take you out sometime?” he blurts out and your eyes widen in surprise

oh

well

you certainly weren’t expecting that

the both of you get back up onto your feet and you tuck emma’s box into your backpack

your cheeks flare up and you let out a little chuckle before scratching the back of your neck “i… uh…”

“i mean, don’t feel pressured to say yes just because i’m emma’s teacher!” taehyung stammers “i just, y’know, i don’t want to overstep here but i think you’re a very beautiful woman and-“

“i would love to.” you clear your throat and take your bottom lip in between your teeth “yeah, i would love to. actually, uh- emma and i, we usually go to this cafe every friday - if you’re free right now, maybe you can come and join us?” you rub your slighTLy damp hands on the back of your jeans and taehyung immediately lightS up and nods quickly

“i would love that. yeah, just… just gimme a second to clean up real quick! i’ll meet you and emma outside?”

“great! yeah, totally. she’s just.. she’s peeing right now so i should probably go check and see that she hasn’t flushed herself down the toilet or anything” you joke as you make your way towards the door and tae splits off to head to his desk “i’ll see you outside!”

you shut the door behind you and you have to quickly press yourself against the wall and you nearly bite your bottom lip off to keep yourself from screaming

your heart is going a million miles an hour and there are butterflies just having a raVE in your stomach

as soon as you leave the room taehyung pumps a fiST into the air in victory because Y E S  HE DID IT

“did you find my box?” emma’s sitting outside the washroom as you approach her and you raise a brow before nodding

“mhm.” she gets up and grabs onto your hand before looking back at the classroom door

huh

did her plan not work

she knows she’s not supposed to say bad words but what the h*ck

she really thought her plan would work!!!!

“mr. kim’s joining us for hot chocolate today, by the way. hope you don’t mind.”  you add casually and a cheshire-cat grin takes over emma’s face

the whole time you and emma and tae are at the cafe emma can’t help but feel proud of herself

you and mr. kim are sitting very vEry close to each other in your booth chatting away while she sits opposite of you two quietly nibbling at a scone and taking small sips of her hot chocolate

S U C C E S S has never tasted so good

help me help you make your wishes come tru (aka send me a request)

masterlist

[yoongihime]

Cheeky Bunny

 Hybrid!AU: Leopard!OC x Bunny!Kook Length: 4.1K (lol is this even a drabble anymore?) Genre: The Most Fluffy Fluff Type: Disney Drabbles ☞REQUEST HERE☜ Recommended OST: (x) Request By: @/kimtrain:“Don’t underestimate the importance of body language." love youuuu MJ so so much  (a/n): IDK OKAY? I REALLY IDK WHY IM SO SOFT. But anyways I this is so frickin fluffy idk anymore (read: I screamed a lot and wanted to smash my keyboard) and any comments are always appreciated, my inbox is open for you lovelies. 

Summary: You’re a predator and he’s the prey, so what happens when the tables finally turn for our dearest bunny? 

“(y/n), you’re fucking drooling.” Taehyung lands a particularly hard pat against the nape of your neck, immediately eliciting a hiss from you and a chuckle from him; your attention now regrettably snagged away from your little crush.

“You brat, that's not a good enough reason to grab my nape,” you hiss, your hands rubbing against the tender flesh. As felines, the neck area is off limits, it’s too intimate and oddly sensitive due to the period where parents would grab their litter my the scruff. So you find it absolutely necessary to repay to favor with a hard smack against his abdomen with your tail, causing a growl to bubble inside the lion-hybrid’s chest, his sunny demeanor evaporating and lips peeling back in act of dominance.

“Oh hush,” you dismiss, rolling your eyes and petting the thick fur of your tail, “You’re honestly acting childish, what are you? A big domestic cat?”

“Just because you are naturally a solitary breed does not excuse you from social norms, (y/n).” Taehyung firmly states, his ears twitching in his messy mop of golden hair. An involuntarily side effect of annoyance.

Well shit, you gone and pissed him off. Again.

“Fine, fine. I’m sorry,” you murmur, your steely blue eyes turning downcast and fluffy white ears laying low in a form of regret. You’re not exactly good with other creatures, since it’s in your nature to want to be prickly and sarcastic, but more often than not you come off as rude or completely awkward. You could say you were born this way. Taehyung lets you brew in your regret for approximately five seconds until the switch it flipped and he’s back to his grossly capricious self.

“Alright, alright that's enough serious talk to last another month, how about we go grab some lunch?” Taehyung suggests, his hand already pulling you closer to his body and his arm wrapping around your form, causing a smile to blossom on your face, taking comfort in his forgiveness. To the entire school you two are the perfect pair, despite the fact that your relationship with Taehyung is completely platonic, the student body seems drawn to the aura you two give off. Taehyung is the ever carefree feline, The Popular Kid everyone gets along with, from the wolves to the fawns, they’re all his loving admirers. At the complete opposite end of the spectrum, there’s you. You’re the icy princess, the rare snow leopard hybrid, with your piercing electric blue eyes and smokey grey hair, you’re the moon to Taehyung’s vibrant sun. It’s quite obvious that people are afraid to approach you, even the biggest predators in the school have difficulty holding a conversation, let alone the domestic creatures. As a cruel twist of fate, the object of your affections, the reason the sun rises and the moon cries, is-

“Hey, bunny!” Taehyung greets the retreating boy, his long strides coming to a halt as he turns to look at the two of you. His tail twitches, the fluffy black ball bouncing where he can’t, bunny ears popping up to match and he turns around with a nervous smile tugging the edges of his lips.

“Jungkook!” You half-yell, causing the boy to flinch in his spot, “Do you want to go have lunch with us?”

“I-I err,” Jungkook begins, his composure already melting by the degree from your attention, “I have a meeting to get to,” he practically spits out and bolts out of the room, causing you to freeze in your tracks, your spirits broken once again.

“H-he he did it again.” You sigh the sentence out, as if the harsh exhale would also expel your disappointment. Collapsing back into the chair, you let Taehyung blatantly laugh at your distress as you sulk in the bitter rejection. Jeon Jungkook, the resident film major and bunny hybrid, is your unrequited crush of two years. It’s not his fault that he’s uncomfortable around you, it’s only natural after all, but the boy goes through such great lengths to avoid you to the point where you’ve convinced yourself-

“He hates me.” You deliver the final blow, the statement cutting deeper into your bruised ego.

“He’s just intimidated, the poor kid is a bunny (y/n), and you look at him like you want to gobble him up.” Taehyung winks, making you groan and place your head none too gently on the surface of the table.

“It’s not intentional,” you bemoan, “he just looks so… sweet.”

“There you go again, stop using adjectives that describes food to talk about him! Delicious, irresistible and delectable are absolutely off limits too,” Taehyung lectures, “unless you’re describing me of course.” Taehyung notes your lack of response with an empathetic pat to your back,

“It’s easy (y/n), just relax a little.”

“What difference would that make?”

“You my dear, underestimate the importance of body language,” he insinuates with a wag of his eyebrows.

Almost as reflex, your tail whips out to punch him once again, but Taehyung is done with your antics and grabs the plush fur, causing you to hiss in surprise,

“Okay, okay let’s get you lunch before you claw my face off.”

“(y/n) and Jungkook, you’ll be partners for the upcoming project.”

It’s quiet. The ensuing silence is borderline comedic in it’s magnitude, sharp enough to cut and thick enough to suffocate, so much so that your professor tilts her chin down, her scrutinizing stare piercing through her -5.75 prescription glasses and her voice shattering the eerily tranquil lack of noise,

“I believe I am to take the silence as an affirmative?”

Jungkook fidgets in his seat, his nervous energy radiating off him in tangible waves that suffocates the air surrounding you, despite the fact that he is seated three rows away. When his back straightens and his lungs fill with more air than the usual capacity, you choke out a response before he could light your reputation along with his into fine-grained embers.

“Yes, m’am.”

His incredulity is apparent, even if you can’t see those precious eyes widen in front of you, he makes his vexation clear as day though the twitch of his ears and the occasional half turns he performs every few minutes to stare blankly at you. As the hours tick by, you begin to get restless. It’s not his fault, or yours for that matter, your senses are simply on high alert from the sheer amount of movement he’s making, his fear soaking into your skin, triggering your instincts to hunt.

As the thin thread of your self control begin to deteriorate, the bell rings, effectively snapping you out of your frenzy. Students begin to shuffle out of the room, along with the professor for her next lecture, but your hairs are still standing on end and you take longer than usual to gather your laptop and array of stationary into your backpack. When the grumbles about said hellish assignments fade, another sound perks you up from your packing, the sound of Jungkook’s sneakers squeaking to a stop in front of your desk. Silence gathers gradually, building up under his gaze until you’re drowning in it and have to look away with a clearing of your throat—

“So when do you want to meet up to do the project?” You zip up your backpack, settling it onto your shoulders and rising from your seat without meeting his gaze. Jungkook swallows, his resolve crumbling when you stand up because you’re that much closer to him and his pounding heart. He wanted to say that sentence, wanted to arrange a time and maybe get you to smile at him again today, but it’s impossible to concentrate when every cell of his being is screaming at him to run. So when your eyes meet his, the orbs chatoyant and inquisitive, he blurts out the first phrase that comes to mind which happens to be-

“I can do it.” He states it like a fact, like he is telling you that the sun rises east and sets west.

Curse that stupid fight or flight response.  

“W-what?” you splutter, your limited patience finally running out. It’s one thing to harbor personal feelings towards you but another completely to bash on your work ethic, so your body chooses the choice that he so easily abandoned: Fight.

“Listen Jungkook, I’m going to hope that you didn’t mean that just now and try again. So you really don’t like me, I get it. You’ve made that more than clear to me, so I don’t know why I keep trying like this.”

A sigh.

Jungkook is at a loss, his mouth opening only to close once again, the only consistency being the frown between this eyebrows and the strange twitching of his ears; his body as uncooperative as ever in this imperative moment.

“Maybe dislike is a bit too tepid,” your face sour, “maybe you even hate me.”

Your finger shoot up to hush him at his sudden look of panic.

Wow, your heart hurt.

Stupid, stupid bunny.

“Don’t worry I’m not going to pounce on you just because of your personal feelings,” you explain, but your claws are extended, “but I will not hesitate to do so when you’re bashing on my honesty and work ethic like this. Now, I’m open to work together during lunch and I have a free period for sixth. Come find me or whatever.”

Your ego is so bruised by this point you stumble haphazardly towards the end of row and closer to the neon exit sign, your escape. Fingertips brushing the metal doorknob, you’re pulled back by a strong grip on your wrist, and of course it’s Jungkook. He’s panting, as if those measly steps towards you required immense effort and if you weren’t so caught in your own bitterness you would have noticed the rose tinted hue coloring his cheeks and the faraway look residing in his eyes when you turned to meet his gaze.

“I-I don’t hate you.” Jungkook pleads, his eyes sincere and you hate how your heart leaps out of your chest at those three words. Not exactly an ‘I love you’ but at least that’s some progress.

“Please give me another chance, (y/n).”

Your anger wants to say no, to cut him off and drown in your own self pity, but his hold tethers you to reality and releases you from your childish emotions. Maybe it’s your stubborn ambition that wants to see him try his best, to pine for you as you have for him or maybe it’s the way your name rolls of his tongue, smooth like a melody, that convinces you to agree,

“Okay.”

“You’re here again today, bunny!” Taehyung greets Jungkook who looks up from his notebook to smile at the lion hybrid as he drapes his legs over the bench across from you. For the past week, Jungkook has been sitting with you at lunch and even near you during classes, his presence rivaling Taehyung’s during your days on campus.

You’ve gotten quite smitten with the boy, but your wounded pride refuses to accept that any of his precious displays of affection could mean anything more than friendship. Yes, the way his hand brushed yours as he picked up his assignment has nothing to do with the fact that he wanted to touch you, but didn’t know how to or the constant smile that appears on his face when he makes you laugh is most obviously one of curtesy for your sake. It has to be. You’d sooner believed that the boy would like you (let alone love you) than if he goes and tattoo ‘I <3 (y/n)’ on his forehead.

Yet the reality is indeed the opposite for the lovestruck bunny. You’re his poison and his cure, a step loving you is just a another step towards realizing how incredibly little of an impression he has in your eyes. To say Jungkook is frustrated by how lukewarm your reactions are to his efforts would be an understatement of enormous proportions; for goodness sake he swears you were not like this last week. So what gives? Oh right, him and his loose reflexes that’s what happened. At the verge of giving up, Jungkook looks pleadingly towards the golden boy across the table, his eyes conveying what his speech can’t.

Taehyung knew it was going to happen sooner or later, that poor bunny is reaching his breaking point. He’s not saying that this is Jungkook’s fault (because let’s face it you’re denser than a steel wall when it comes to romance, especially once you’ve been jaded by it), but he’s not going to say that the bunny is innocent in this either. So when those round, clear eyes turn his way as he was munching on his cheeseburger, Taehyung swallows thickly, knowing exactly what the brunette is asking of him.

“Hey (y/n), can you so get me a soda?” Taehyung interrupts your scribbling, your eyes looking from him to his half filled water bottle with apprehension.

“You have drink right there?” you question, clearly confused by his need for another beverage.

“Please? I’ll buy you lunch tomorrow, I’m really thirsty.” Taehyung pleads, his large hands coming to frame his face in a V and his eyes blinking rapidly in an attempt to act cute. Damn him and his beautiful face, if it was anyone else they would look like a Class 1 idiot, but Taehyung somehow pulls the stunt off with grace. You immediately cringe at the display but laughter blooms from your chest nonetheless,

“Okay, okay I’m going. No need to threaten me Tae.”

As you shuffle away, Taehyung turns his attention to the Jungkook. The boy was staring after you with so much longing Tae considering smacking the lovesick grin right off his face.

“So Jungkook,” Taehyung begins, causing those doe eyes to meet his scrutinizing ones, “maybe its just me, but I think you like my best friend.”

Jungkook splutters on the water he was sipping, his chest having up and down to ease the burning of his lungs.

“I- err ..yeah.” Jungkook’s noncommittal response drifts from his lips, if admitting it to Taehyung as difficult, how the hell was he going to say that to you? He grasps his chocolate brown locks messing up the already fluffy strands,

“But she doesn’t notice at all! I’ve been trying so hard.” Jungkook groans, his frustrations overwhelming his shyness for the time being.

“Listen, bunny. You’re going to have to try a lot harder than that for that girl to understand. She likes you too you know?” Taehyung says through a mouthful of fries, causing Jungkook’s ears to perk with interest but his face remains pouty and sad on the surface of the table.  

“I’ve been trying so hard though, Tae. Compared to before at least.” Jungkook sulks.

“Ah, that’s where you’re wrong, my boy! She had hope before you went and shot all of that down and now her emotions are in Grade A lockdown prison called Denial. Unless you want to spell it out and tell her straightforwardly she’s not going to register any of it.”

Jungkook groans, his ears drooping with realization.

“So what do you suggests I do?”

Taehyung’s devilish smile is rather unsettling but Jungkook trusts the lion to not fail him and he draws closer for Tae to whisper into his soft ears.

You come back to a rather strange scene: Jungkook blushing profusely as Taehyung pinches his ear, cackling and whispering something into them only for the two of them to answer with guilty Nothing’s when prompted.

Finger quivering, you take in a deep breath before pressing the little doorbell. It elicits a light, soft sound inside the household, probably because bunny hybrids are sensitive to noises. You hear multiple thumps from the inside, no doubt the siblings Jungkook told you about, and three seconds later the boy himself appears in front of you. He looks amazing today as always, his brown locks ruffled and black ears sitting attentively on top along with a huge cream-colored sweater that he fills out all too well, completed by distressed jeans that seem to be screaming for air from his muscular thighs. As if he’s vocalizing your thoughts—

“You look beautiful today.” Jungkook compliments with a blush, his cheeks turning rosy and a cough is forced out of his chest as a way to avoid your eyes.

Only curtesy (y/n). He’s being polite. You chant mentally, not daring to search for any hidden meanings behind his words. Your body is a bit more honest with the way your ears seem to stand on end, and a dust of rose also makes an appearance across your features.

“Thank you,” you manage to reply, “you’re not so bad yourself.”

He seems to be encouraged by that, taking you by the hand and tugging you upstairs towards his room with some utterance of how his parents are away on a trip and that’s why he has to babysit the kids. His comments flow into one ear and out the other because all you process are your heartbeats ringing in your ears and the way his hand completely envelope yours.

God what is this boy trying to pull today? you mentally yell, praying that he won’t be able to feel your racing pulse through your adjoined hands.

“This is my room.” He announces, hand still firmly holding on to yours despite the fact that the two of you arrived at your destination.

It’s as if you’re seeing an extension of Jungkook between the rows of black and white film photos on the wall, the neat and tiny desk, as well as his color coded figurines down to his deep navy blue sheets that smells just like him.

“You’re so neat.” you breathe out, not knowing what to say when you’re so immersed in his scent you’re practically dizzy from the pheromones.

You pull away from his hold, not looking back to notice his pout and sitting down in his office chair, as far away from him as possible.

“Let’s get to work then!” You suggest, and he nods pulling another chair right next to yours, and leaning over to turn on the desk lamp. At this angle he’s close enough for your lips to brush his nape, the temptations making your canines ache. All too soon he leans back, his smile innocent and you had to exert all your self control not to groan in frustration.

You and Jungkook.

In his room, immersed in his scent.

With about two inches of space in between.

Yep, this was going to be the longest day of your life.

This has to be the most productive you’ve been in your entire life. Maybe it’s because this project is worth more than half your grade, or maybe it has something to do with the need to distract your mind from the bunny sitting next to you. You’re busy drawing up the next draft when—

“Kookie?”

“Oh my god it’s a mini Jungkook!” You exclaim before your mind realized what you were saying, but the tiny little boy at the door was too adorable to dismiss with just a glance. He’s simply too precious, with his short grey ears and round eyes, you barely held yourself back enough to scoop him up in your arms. Jungkook laughs at the wonder displayed on your face, a little jealous that his little brother would be able to steal your heart so easily when he couldn’t.

“Yes Jeonghyun?” Jungkook rushes to his little brother’s side, but the little boy only eyes you with apprehension as he pulls his older brother closer.

“Okay, okay don’t cry.” Jungkook soothes him, lifting him easily in his arms and walking away with him, but not before you spot the unmistakable glare the little bunny is throwing your way.

Great, his entire family hates me, you sigh, the thought more disturbing to you than you would have imagined.

“Hello? Earth to (y/n)?”

You blink, realizing that Jungkook has been trying to get your attention.

“Are you okay?” He prompts, his face a bit to close for your liking so you nod your head, not trusting your voice quite yet.

“C’mon I know you well enough to know when you’re sulking (y/n),” Jungkook places both hands on your cheeks, causing your eyes to widen, “What’s wrong?”

“Would your entire family be scared of me?” You whisper the question because even to you it sounds ridiculous and childish. Jungkook is surprised by the hurt in your voice, but it makes him realize how vulnerable you are right now, with your heart on your sleeve and tears pricking your eyes. You’re simply too soft, delicate enough for him to strengthen his resolve and pick you up princess style, plopping onto his bed with you snuggled tight on his lap.

“Jungkook—“ You tense in surprise, trapped on his legs with his chin resting on your right shoulder and his arms the lock to your makeshift prison.

“Of course not, (y/n). I’m not scared one bit.” Jungkook declares, as if it is the most obvious thing in the world. To emphasize his point, his hands intertwine with yours, fingers grasping yours tight and his face nuzzles deeper into the crook of your neck, his nose skimming your sensitive nape, eliciting an involuntary pleased sigh from you.

“Jungkook, stop.” You plead, but your voice is much too weak and your body melts further into his hold. Why is he so strong for such a bunny? You never realized how broad he was until this moment, with your body so easily wrapped up into a harmless little bundle on his lap.

“Don’t wanna.” He protest, the childish tint to his voice only making you blush harder.

“You’re supposed to do this with someone you like.” You protest, but you’re as soft as dough in his grip at his point.

“You’re so dense you know that?” He pauses, beaming at you and you open your mouth to counter when he saying takes the chance to attack,

“I like you, you dummy.”

As if the crushing embarrassment crashed down on him all at once, he burrows his face back into your neck, letting you precess the words all by yourself, eyes glazed over and dreamy. It’s not until he begins to laugh that you snap back into reality,

“(y/n) why are you making that noise, it sounds like you’re choking on your meows.”

You completely heat up at that, burning much to hot to be suffocated on his lap.

“It’s called chuffing you dumb bunny,” you defend your self, cheeks overheating at this point,

“and it means I like you too.”

The pair of you soak in the moment until you hear Jungkook’s gentle musings, “Ah Jeonghyun is going to be even more upset,” he says as he kisses your temple, you’re so distracted from the feeling of his lips on your skin that you don’t even question it, but he graciously explains, “he’s a little jealous of you.”

You make a noise of acknowledgement, your brain overridden by your heart and its giddy thumps.

“It’s okay I like him more than you anyways.” You teasingly tell Jungkook, causing the bunny to flip you over on his lap so that you’re straddling him. Preparing yourself for a retort, your mind completely blanks when he surprises you with a kiss instead of a reply. He’s as sweet as you assumed in your daydreams, his lips gentle and hesitant against yours. Sugar melting on your tongue, you instantly crave more of him, his scent, his taste. True to your nature, you let out in impatient whine, having none of his gentleness when all you want to do is taste him properly. You pull him closer by the baby hairs on his nape, giggling slightly as he lets out a keen of surprise when you nip at his bottom lip and soothes it with your tongue.

“Serves you right, bunny.” You taunt, mirth filling your eyes and laughter ringing until he shuts you up with another kiss, his finishing statement making you splutter with shock—

“I love you, kitten.”

.

.

.

“So what do you suggest I do?”

Taehyung’s devilish smile is rather unsettling but Jungkook trusts the lion to not fail him and he draws closer for Tae to whisper into his soft ears.

“She really loves it when people call her kitten, why don’t you try that?”

“Wha—“

“Trust me.”

“What are you guys whispering about?”

“Nothing!”

[itzryyo]

More

          I am currently on a bus heading into the city for a field trip and am trying to maintain my sanity while also attempting to distract myself from the fact that I didn’t go to the bathroom before we left and traffic is real.        

          Someone asked me the other day, “So, like, what is your obsession with Drake all about?” My first reaction was to answer their question with a question and ask “uhh…why aren’t you obsessed with Drake?” To be fair, they were justified in asking me because I have a propensity to be incredibly all-or-nothing when it comes to my affinity for certain things (i.e., Chick-Fil-A, the Mets, Titanic & The Dark Knight to name a few.) I’m not really sure where it comes from, MOM, but it’s been that way my whole life. While I don’t have a vast array of interests, the things I am interested in, I commit to whole-heartedly. However, when it comes to music, we are talking about an entirely different entity.

          While TV shows, films and books can influence, art can inspire, and sports can invigorate, I contend that nothing touches the soul the way music does. When I’m in a good mood, Bruno Mars or Justin Timberlake will enjoy that mood with me. If I’m feeling melancholy, it’s much easier to have Boyz II Men or Dru Hill help me out than it is to plop down on the couch, put on “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” and commit to watching the whole thing. You know exactly what I’m talking about. You know what it was like when you heard “Burn” by Usher for the first time and he, word for word, expressed exactly how you felt about your current, 3-week-old high school relationship. Yes, we all wanted to be Spider-Man the first time we saw it in theaters, but do you still feel that way if, for some God-forsaken reason, TBS is airing it on a random day off? Probably not. But what about if “Bye-Bye-Bye” comes on the radio randomly while you're driving in the car? I guarantee you are gracefully moving your right arm from right to left while opening and closing your hand just like Justin, J.C. and the rest of the boys did. Whether your music is on shuffle and that ONE song comes on or you have listened to “Someone Like You” for the 32nd time in a row, music infiltrates the soul and is an uncanny medication for the heart. 

           Okay, but there's a lot of really good music, Ry, why the fix on this particular artist? I'm glad you just asked [in my imagination.] The power of music lies in one's ability to relate to it. I'm honest enough to admit that I have a tendency to think my opinions are unerring. I'll quickly discredit an artist or band because I personally don't like it, but to completely discredit another's experience or admiration because of my subjectivity is irresponsible and ignorant. I will never understand an artist like Future. I was disappointed when Drake did an entire album with him. But I've talked with people who have explained that (when they can understand what he's saying) they really relate to his songs. More power to 'em. A lot of people don't like Drake. I've heard (and argued) many people who dislike him for a myriad of reasons ranging from being "soft" to "not struggling enough" to "sounding the same on every song.” I can't make anyone like the guy and that's not why I'm even writing this in the first place. Remember: Traffic. Middle-schoolers. Full bladder. Voila.

          Reverting back to a previous point, music invades and harps on human emotion. I grew up with a variety of musical tastes because I was raised by an all-white family while almost all my friends were minorities. My uncle introduced me to Pearl Jam, Nirvana, The Doors and The Beatles. My mom played “American Pie”, Goo-Goo Dolls, Alanis Morisette, Sheryl Crow and Matchbox 20 on our road trips to Ohio in the summer (she also can rap “Public Service Announcement” and “Rapper’s Delight” word for word.) My dad blasted The Fugees, Jagged Edge, Ginuwine and Joe, while my friends and teammates got me well-acquainted with Jay, Mobb Deep, Dipset and DMX. This plethora of music has made me appreciative of all musical genres. Thanks to Apple Music and Spotify, all these artists are accessible with the touch of a button.

          If I had to choose, R&B and Hip-Hop would be my first two choices on what to listen to for the rest of my life. D-Block on my way to basketball practice and Brian McKnight while I fell asleep. “Fortunate” by Maxwell when I had a crush and “What They Want” by DMX and Sisqo when they rejected me. This was the routine growing up.

          I was sitting in my bedroom as a 9th grader the first time I heard “Cry For You” by Jodeci. If I put it on right now, I would feel the exact same way that I did the first time I heard it. So when Drake made a song referencing one of the greatest R&B groups of all-time, let alone one of my favorite songs, the connection grew stronger.

          Finding an artist who tapped into both genres with equal prowess was a dream come true for me. Add to that dual threat an artist who is biracial, grew up a single child in a single-parent household, raised by a white mother, and now you’re starting to reflect my actual upbringing. The funny thing about growing up biracial is that there never really seems to be a middle ground. Within the black community, I never felt “black” enough, as though it was my own doing that I was raised by a white mother; as if somehow it was my responsibility to earn my blackness more than those darker than I was, and until that validation was given, I couldn’t fit in. Flipping to the other side, when your entire family is white and your tan doesn’t go away in the winter, you stick out. I couldn’t style my hair like my uncle Jim’s. My little cousins never got asked if they were adopted. I was an anomaly for actually knowing the words to “Iris” by Goo-Goo Dolls. Considering all that, when Drake says “I used to get teased for being black and now I’m here and I’m not black enough, ‘cause I’m not acting tough or making stories up ‘bout where I’m actually from,” it hits home and it hits home hard.

          I didn’t grow up with any male presence consistently in my life. I taught myself how to shave. My mother taught me how to play sports. Nobody taught me how to fight, or “be a man.” I learned the definition of strength by seeing the women in my life bounce back from heartbreak and hardships. I also learned how to be really in touch with my emotions. I am a feeler. I feel every emotion in every crevice of my heart. So when this same biracial artist, who was raised by a single, white mother, explodes onto the hip-hop scene but is making emotional music, I cannot help but look up to him. When every attack and knock against this same biracial artist is that he’s too “soft” and is “too emotional,” my confusion swells. “What do you mean ‘too emotional’?!” Ironically enough, the very same people who bludgeon Drake’s music due to its overt honesty and raw emotion are probably the ones who can relate to it more than anyone else.

          Yes, the trap music is entertaining, but I can guarantee you that most of the men slandering Aubrey’s name have made more drunk calls to their ex (thanks Marvin’s Room) in a few months than they’ve ever pushed drugs, been gang affiliated or actually held a gun. Does this mean that those artists that promote that at the forefront of their records don’t reach people? Absolutely not. Kendrick Lamar, Jay-Z, Big Pun and others grew up around gangs, drugs and violence and speaks on things I have never seen or experienced in such a way, but there are plenty of people who have, which is the beauty of this whole music thing.

          Back to Aubrey. In a world immersed in the superficial, is not authenticity a breath of fresh air? Hasn’t the complaint in the hip-hop community always been a lack of credibility from certain rappers and artists? So now, we have someone who owns their identity, not trying to be something that he isn’t, and he’s not welcome here. So when Drake (referencing his friendship with Lil’ Wayne) says, “Weezy been on the edge, you n*****s just need to chill, if anything happen to papi, might pop a n***** for real,” people balk at the claim. Why? Because he makes R&B music and that is apparently synonymous with weakness. I don’t like guns and I am not a promoter of violence, but I’m a believer in defending the people closest to you. This is also a reflection of the frailty of masculinity in the 21st century, but I can’t let my ADD take me there.

          “But Ry, he isn’t real hip-hop. He talks white!” What do you think my friends used to say to me all the time growing up? The. Same. Damn. Thing. So yes, I appreciate Drake “talking white” in interviews because that’s the voice he was born with. I can’t help the way my voice sounds and it’s ridiculous to think I’d have to change it to meet a social standard. In a culture that watches, critiques and pounces on every single thing people do, Drake has never once strayed away from embracing all of the cultures he was introduced to growing up. He didn’t make apologies for making songs like “Doing It Wrong” and putting them on the same album where he put “Lord Knows.”Also, “Shut It Down” and “Uptown” are distinguishable, but not mutually exclusive. They both came from the same artist and they both hit when you put them on.

          I spent an inordinate amount of time growing up trying to establish which race I wanted to affiliate myself with full time. This artist and this music shattered that notion. From breakups to ball games, homages to family and anthems for friends, there is no area of life where there isn’t a soundtrack to go with it. That is a very comforting feeling for someone who struggled with having to choose between which culture to embrace. The dichotomy of having to choose one or the other was onerous but having someone burst into the industry that showed me, through their music, that it’s okay to fully embrace both was liberating. Is every song a hit? Um, actually…okay, maybe not every song. Was Views a great album? Eh, not my favorite. But that’s the beauty of music. You get to go on that journey with an artist and watch them grow and explore and hopefully, their last album doesn’t sound anything like the first, because that’s what growth is (Hi, Kanye fans).

          It doesn’t really matter what he puts out these days because as a fan, I’m always expecting the best and as a person, I’ll always be grateful for the lessons I learned from the music. As a fan, I’ll always want more. More emotion, more vulnerability, more bars and More Life.