#i’m deathly afraid of dogs

[sahrii]

my heart dropped to my toes why is there a dog i. this care home

[1-800-kami]

4:23 pm | the adventures of dad!gojo

content: 0.9k words, fem!reader, dad gojo, megumi is your son, silly crack fic

gojo satoru is a man with very little fears.

in actuality, people are afraid of him. a mere gaze from those cerulean blue eyes of his sends people running off to the opposite direction, so the adjective “intimidating” was quite the understatement to describe him. some might even say that he’s the strongest, so he possesses no fear at all.

despite that, gojo has one thing he’s deathly afraid of: you–his wife, when you’re angry.

“suguru, help me out here!” geto can physically feel his bestfriend’s panic through the phone. gojo explained the situation in a fast ramble–geto could barely understand what he was saying, but he thinks he got the gist of it: you went out to run some errands and entrusted gojo to take care of your two year old child, megumi, while you were out. gojo conjured up the genius idea of keeping megumi entertained by handing him a paper and markers–so that they could surprise you with megumi’s amazing artistic abilities once you came back home.

it had gone “so well”, gojo said earlier, picking up the paper and studying it. “i think this is a drawing of a cat? or a dog, i don’t really know.. still, it’s made by my son, and it’s the peak of art and i think everyone should see it!”

gojo was so busy trying to decipher what megumi had drawn that he didn’t realize that his son still had the markers in his hands. when he peers over to look at megumi again, he just about screamed.

“gumi- no- GUMI!” he shrieks, snatching the markers away from his son’s hold. megumi, not having a paper to draw on anymore, decided to use the wall as his canvas instead—sketching a poorly drawn house with a bright red marker. “you’re not supposed to draw on the wall! aw fuc-ahem, freak… your mom’s gonna kill me…”

“gosh suguru, some advice would help!” satoru’s never been so afraid in all his years of living. you’re coming home pretty soon, and he has no idea what to do. he’s already imagining the look on your face–and it’s pushing satoru to the brink of passing out. gojo satoru–the renowned sorcerer who’s fought the king of curses, been sealed away in a box and has had multiple near death experiences–all of these things have happened to him yet none can compare to the fear of facing his wife when she’s angry.

“hmm? what is it, nanako?” satoru can hear his bestfriend trying not to laugh over the phone. suguru knows an easy solution to his problem, but he thinks that leaving satoru in the dark is funnier. it’s rare to see the strongest sorcerer like this, so geto revels in it with pure amusement. “you’re hungry? okay… let’s see what i can make for you, yeah?”

“you heard her, satoru~ one of the twins are hungry. i’m afraid i have to go… good luck about the markers, yeah?” suguru hangs up before satoru could say a word. he curses under his breath, but feels his heart stop when he hears the door unlock.

you’re home.

“mama!” megumi yells, clapping his hands and slowly crawling over to the front door. you happily greet your son, placing the grocery bags on the table.

you walk over to your husband, kissing him on the cheek before noticing the piece of paper that he’s holding. “oh? what’s this?”

you grab the paper from his hands and satoru regains a little bit of his composure once he hears you coo at your son’s drawing. “thought it would be nice for me and megumi to surprise you while you were gone… it’s a drawing of a cat-”

“horsey!”

“...a horse. yup, that’s what i said!” he sheepishly ignores his son’s glare, mentally preparing himself to tell you about the wall.

“i love it! oh my gosh, megumi, aren’t you just a little artist?” you say, ruffling your son’s hair with a big smile. “this is definitely going on the fridge.”

“...there’s one small problem, though…” satoru refuses to meet your gaze.

“what did you do this time, satoru?”

“hey, it technically wasn’t me!” he says, this time being the one to shoot the glare at his son. “so hypothetically…what if i told you that gumi thought it would be a nicer idea to use the wall as a canvas instead of the paper?”

“...”

satoru perceives your silence as his death sentence. “look, i’m sorry! i was trying to figure out what he drew and i forgot that he still had the markers in his hands-”

“satoru-”

“and the next thing i know, he drew on the wall before i was able to take the markers from him-”

“toru-”

“and suguru wasn’t giving me advice either, but then-”

“satoru!” your final yell finally breaks him from his ramble. he’s surprised to see that no, you don’t have a look of murder on your face. in fact, you’re actually smiling—looking more amused than anything.

“satoru, they’re washable markers.” you take a baby wipe from your purse and walk over to the wall, wiping away the bright red marker strokes easily with a few swipes. you’re trying not to laugh at his dumbfounded expression. “did you not know that?”

now he’s the one stunned into silence. “...”

“no, no… i definitely knew that…!”

“yeah, sure you did.”

being a father is so difficult.

[ididdedurmom]

More evil head cannons

I have silly ideas about the gang after the event of the story, everyone lives, except Bob

PONY:

Has a thousand yard stare when he zones out

Has the loudest, most disgusting, mucus filled cough ever

Actually really good at drawing

Has drawn every member of the gang at least twice

Loves physical touch, he leans on his friends when their sitting next to him.

Actually screams during horror movies, like loud genuine screams

Loves play fighting with Darry, like full on wrestling

Steve taught him how to drive

He either walks like a ghost or stomps, there is no in between

He can play one song on the guitar, and that’s it

His legs are super strong, so his kicks hurt really bad

He would be better at track, but his smoking habits hold him back

He feels jealous of Soda and Darry because they had more time with their parents

He and Darry have matching reading glasses

SODA:

He says “I’m just a girl” anytime he gets in trouble

He has used his pretty privilege to get out of being arrested multiple times

Despite how handsome he knows he is, he still feels super insecure about his looks

He steals from the DX station constantly

He and Steve spend hours gossiping about their customers once both of their shifts are over

A dog bit him when he was a kid, now he’s deathly afraid of them

He loves physical affection, hugging him is the best way to cheer him up

Absolute candy addict

Candy is the #1 item he steals from the DX

He broke his dominant hand once, and now his handwriting is permanently ruined

He reads insanely slow and monotone when he reads out loud

He either sleeps like a rock, or wakes up from the slightest sound, there is no in between

He lives in his flannel, that thing hasn’t been washed in literal years

He suffers from middle child syndrome, he knows his brothers love him, but they don’t pay enough attention to him

DARRY:

He hates his jobs, he knows he has to go but he can’t stand them

All of his coworkers are old and they treat him like a child (which he’s kind of okay with in a way)

He loves watching cartoons but he feels like he’d be wasting his time

He sneezes like a dad

He wakes up at 4 am and works out immediately

Loves compliments and words of affection

Doing favors is his love language

He has the whitest legs ever, he’s all tan on the top and snow white on the bottom

His tan ends where his pants start

Small bits of his hair are grey, he doesn’t know

He has a fear of abandonment

He is insanely flexible for a man of his size, like he can touch the floor standing up with ease

He hit a dog with his car once and cried for 2 hours straight

He loves cuddling on the couch with his brothers, it helps him relax

He despises Curly Shepard, he’s civil with Tim, but he HATES Curly

When he comes home from his ski trips with his old friends, he actually looks his age

A woman once assumed he was Pony’s father, and it made him die inside a little

He can’t stand Mother and Fathers Day

He was mad at Steve when he found out he taught Pony how to drive

TWO-BIT:

He and Dally bond by harassing women

He has a box full of things he’s stolen

His slight alcoholism stems from his father

He let’s his sister paint his nails, and he shows them off proudly

He gets his nails painted before rumbles

He watches soap operas with his mother every night

He can play the trumpet

He has never purchased a pack of cigarettes, only stolen

He listens to metal

When he passes Johnny’s house, he has to actively stop himself from walking in and beating Johnny’s parents half to death, especially his father

Its not that he doesn’t want a job, I mean he doesn’t, it’s that he thinks he’d only mess up whenever they had him do

He constantly forgets to brush his teeth

Pop and beer are the only things he drinks, he doesn’t touch water

He religiously wears Mickey Mouse merch, you will never catch him in a plain shirt

Baby Pony and him got along really well, he was kinda like Pony’s goofy cousin

Two-Bit and Darry have been friends since they were little kids

Two has no plans for his future, and it weighs on him

He broke both of his elbows once

His teachers have kinda given up on him, they just treat him like a bother instead of a student

STEVE:

He messes up Pony’s hair every chance he gets

He uses the most hair grease out of everyone

He has had the same comb for 3 years

He constantly smells like oil

The underside of his nails are always black, no matter how much he washes his hands

He and Soda have matching scars from a shared failed attempt to climb a barb wired fence

He is terrified of the police

He and Soda make your mom jokes at each other, despite neither of them having mothers

His voice is scarily deep when he wakes up

He and Two-Bit have an inside joke no one in the gang understands

He, Soda, and Two-Bit all have matching stick and poke tattoos

He hates his father, and by extension the fathers of Johnny and Two-Bit

He and Dally don’t hang out much, but when they do they are absolute menaces

Dally and him steal cars and hub caps together

He is genuinely upset by the size of his nose

JOHNNY:

He’s dyslexic

His handwriting is atrocious

His best subject is math

He and the gang all picked out stickers to put on his crutches

He loves sleeping around his friends

His hands are rough

He can’t stand the smell of beer, unless it’s one of the gang

He and Curly hate each other for literally no reason

Pony has slowly been teaching him to read better

No matter how much grease he puts in his hair, it won’t stay back

He hates going out in public because people always look at him funny

He hates looking at his burn scars

He, Dally, and Ponyboy watch sunsets together

He either sleeps at the Cutis’s house, Two-Bit’s house, Steve’s (very rarely), or Dallas’s place.

He’s not allowed to sleep in the lot anymore

He has tons of freckles, you just can’t see them against his skin

He loves sleeping outside when he wants to

He never wants children, he’s to scared he’ll become his father

His pain tolerance is so high that sometimes he won’t even notice when he gets injured

He likes how defensive Dallas is of him, makes him feel confident

He smokes marijuana with Dally sometimes, he’s super anxious when they do though because he doesn’t want to get arrested

DALLY:

He will not talk about his feelings

The cops forced him to go to therapy, it didn’t fix anything

He is amazing at lying

The police know him by name

He hasn’t told the gang much about the past other than where he came from and that he doesn’t talk to his folks

Darry nicknamed him “Rat”

He actually feels bad when Darry yells at him

He gets sun burns very quickly

He has his own personal stench

He doesn’t want Johnny to end up like him

He cried for 3 hours straight when he found out Johnny was still alive, it is his most embarrassing moment

He chugs drinks insanely fast

He can’t read very well

He needs glasses but he thinks he’d look like a wimp if he had any

Even though he knows he could have an asthma attack from coughing to hard, he still doesn’t carry his inhaler

He was happy when he thought he was going to die

Then he woke up and had an epiphany about life, it didn’t do to much, but now he knows death isn’t the only option

He proudly shows off the burn marks on his arm

He loves pushing Johnny around in his wheelchair

He listens to outlaw music and Frank Sinatra

He loves horror movies

He toned down his bad behavior once he got out of the hospital, he’s still a dick though

That’s it or whatever. I hope you like them, I’m sorry if some of them don’t make sense. I’m just so silly. I apologize for my horrible grammar lol. Feel free to tell me some of your head cannons!! :D

[peppiekorn]

hey, i hate to ask for this again, but i’m extremely low on money this week because i had to buy medicine for me & my nephews this week. my sister has, per usual, left the home and left me to take care of her dog that i’m deathly afraid of, and has left me with very little dog food for her’s and mine. she also had promised to drive me to work this weekend, and obviously went back on that promise.

my commissions are also open, and in my pinned post!

c*shapp / p*ypal / v*nmo

i just need enough for rides for the rest of this week, and for a big bag of dog food that’ll last us a while

$0 / $130

[dragon-creates]

I started this short bowuigi little mermaid au thing a few days ago as a little something to help me feel better cause my depression was basically being like ‘hey, wanna feel ten times worse than usual?’ It was to be a short little thing to self-indulge with, YET IT SOMEHOW IS OVER 5K WORDS, FUCKING HOW?!?!?!?!? Anyways, enjoy. (Edit, to the person who pointed out that Junior said Luigi's name before Bowser finds out, you're a real one and I just fixed it thanks xx).

In the surface land, Bowser is trying to get Princess Peach to marry him because he sees her as the ‘perfect bride’ for him to be happy but she’s not having it.

“Isn’t she lovely Kamek, her golden hair, the way she glides when she moves. Plus, she would be a perfect mother for Junior!”

“Sire, she threw a shoe at your head the last time you proposed to her.”

“…and?”

“Seriously Papa?”

Yeah, Kamek and Junior are starting to get sick of it.

Meanwhile, in the ocean, Mario and Luigi’s parents rule the seven seas. While Mario is more adventurous and outgoing, Luigi is more content to stay under the sea (you’re allowed to hate me for that terrible pun).

See, unlike Ariel, Luigi is deathly afraid of the surface land as he’s heard about all about the terrifying Bowser and what he’s willing to do to get what he wants to he wants to stay as far as possible from there.

“There’s nothing to be scared of Luigi, I’d be able to keep you safe if we were ever near the surface.”

“N-no way! W-what if B-Bowser’s there a-an-d-d gets mad a-at us f-or t-t-t-trespassing! I-I’ll be fine here with Ma and Pa.”

(Luigi also has long hair cause I’m a sucker for long-haired Luigi.)

Que King Boo, a ghostly underwater sea monster who wants to take over both the land and sea but isn’t powerful enough to do so. He knows that Luigi means a lot to his family, so he decides to pull a devious trick to distract them from their duties so he can take over the throne.

“Well, well, well, despite how much of a cowardly shrimp he is, this little prince could be of use to me.”

He uses Polterpup (a ghost sea-lion pup that is able to turn into a dog if he goes to the surface land) to distract Luigi, making him think that a dog had fallen into the sea and needs help. Luigi follows the sound of the distressed barking, hoping to help the innocent animal when suddenly, he’s captured by Boo’s minions and with the limited power that he has, he uses it to turn Luigi into a human to make him unable to return home. That way, while Luigi’s family will be looking for their son, he can try and take over the underwater kingdom and use that power to take over the surface land. Just to make sure that Luigi doesn’t tell anyone, King Boo steals Luigi’s voice and sends him to the edge of the Darklands.

“Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha! Try going home and telling your mommy and daddy about this one princey! Oh wait, you can’t!”

However, since King Boo’s powers are still weak there is a way that the spell can be reserved so he purposely neglects to tell Luigi that the spell can be broken with true love’s kiss.

Luigi is distraught and terrified, already afraid of the surface land and is now forced to live there with no way of being able to ask for help.

Feeling guilty, Polterpup decides to help Luigi get used to his human legs and brings him a rag from a ship to help make into some makeshift clothes.

Meanwhile, Bowser and Junior are minding their own business at the shore of the Darklands when suddenly, Junior sees an unfamiliar human struggling to stand on his own two feet.

“Look Dad! There’s a human, like Peach!”

He gets a bit over excited and runs from his dad to go see Luigi.

Luigi, still frightened and wary of surface creatures (and the fact that this is Bowser’s son! So, if the king sees him with Junior, he could burn him to a crisp!) he gets spooked easily by the child and fumbles his way onto a rock. Polterpup stands in front of Luigi to create some distance with the overzealous child. Eventually, Bowser makes his way over to see what all the fuss is about.

“Junior, what have I told you about running off?!”

“But look Papa, it’s another human! I’ve never seen another human before apart from Peach!”

Bowser suddenly notices Luigi, who ducks behind Polterpup, trying to hide as much of himself as he can.

Bowser is taken aback, like Junior, Peach is the only human he’s seen so he’s never had the chance to formally get to know another one. He sees that the human is a bit skittish, so he tries to be as unintimidating as possible.

“Uh, hey there, sorry about Junior, he has the tendency to get overexcited sometimes.”

“Hey!”

Luigi is still unsure; he’s only ever heard tales about how the king of the koopas was able to be rid of his enemies just with one swipe of his claw. So, seeing him up close makes him want to piss himself.

Bowser can see that the human is still nervous, though he’s a little bit offended, he can’t really blame the human for being scared.

“Did you, uh, get in a shipwreck? Cause I can see that the only thing you’re dressed in is a sail.”

Luigi finally peaks his head out and nods a little bit, wondering why the koopa hasn’t done anything to him yet. Junior is suddenly asking him a lot of questions.

“Woah, you got in a shipwreck?! That’s so cool! Was there tons of thunder and lightning?! Did your ship light on fire?! Your dog is so cool! Is he a ghost?!”

Startled again, Luigi nearly falls off the rock until Bowser catches him. Luigi suddenly starts trembling both from fear and the cold. The king notices this and tries to ask him if he’s alright to try and loosen the tension, but the human is silent.

“What’s wrong? Can’t talk or something?”

He says that sarcastically and laughs a little to try and make the human do so as well, but he takes one look in the human’s eyes and realises that he actually can’t.

“Oh, I see.”

Luigi is hugging himself at this point, wanting to run and hide but he was getting colder and colder by the minute. Bowser then decides to take the human back to the castle to get him warmed up and a little bit less scared.

“Don’t worry, Kamek and Kammy will know how to help you. You’ll be feeling better soon.”

That gets Luigi to look up at the king with curiosity as Bowser carries him back to the castle with Junior and Polterpup by his side. The great ferocious king was holding him ever so gently and promising to help him, he doesn’t know how to feel at this point.

As soon as Kamek and Kammy see Luigi shivering and drenched, they are instantly ‘grandparents mode activated. They take Luigi from Bowser and lead the human into bathroom, (Bowser totally didn’t want to carry him there) Kamek makes him tea and gives Luigi a few biscuits while Kammy is drawing a warm bubble bath for him.

“Here you are now, its not much but it will help fill and warm you up a little bit.”

Luigi has never tasted land food before; he finds it to be quite nice. He even enjoys the bath, letting the water heat him up and blowing on the bubbles. Kammy finds the site adorable.

“The poor thing, washing up from a shipwreck must’ve been so terrifying for you, especially if you heard about the reputation of the Darklands. Don’t worry, we just want to help you feel better and feel comfortable here.”

Kamek comes into the room holding a few dresses and suits, asking the human which one he’d like to wear for dinner. Although Luigi didn’t need to wear clothes as a mermaid, he does know that land creatures wear them all the time. He instantly chooses one of the dresses (because gender norms don’t exist, and Luigi is allowed to wear whatever the fuck he wants!)

Later, Kammy is helping Luigi get changed while Kamek, Junior and Bowser are in the dining room talking about Peach again.

“All I’m saying sire is that it might be due time to stop pursuing the princess. She had already disagreed to your other proposals, and I don’t see her agreeing any time soon.”

“I can’t just give up on her Kamek, Peach makes me feel things that I’ve never felt for anyone. I will marry her, one day.”

As if right on time, Kammy and Luigi are there, the former ushering in the shy man.

“Don’t be so nervous darling, you look lovely!”

Luigi then steps into the room, wearing a beautiful green dress (a green version of Ariel’s pink dress) with Polterpup by his side to keep him company.

Bowser is starstruck, he’s never seen a human look this beautiful before.

“Y-you look amazing.”

Luigi blushes, still nervous but the compliment gives him butterflies.

“Come sit next to me human!”

Junior takes his hand and leads him next to his seat, which happens to also be next to Bowser’s at the head of the table. To try and take his mind off the fact that he’s sitting next to Bowser, Luigi starts focusing on the plates and cutlery, he’s never really seen that many human artefacts before so it’s all so intriguing to him (expect when Mario brings back some from his adventures, but he doesn’t really know what they are either.)

Bowser becomes amused at Luigi’s curiosity for the simple objects he had, his appreciation for things that seem to be mundane gives him a swell of pride.

“I guess my silverware is kinda nice, isn’t it?”

Luigi immediately puts the fork don’t and hides under his hair, afraid that he might have disrespected the king, but Bowser is quick to reassure him that he doesn’t mind.

“It’s just that no one else I know is fascinated by these types of things, so its nice to see someone that it.”

Luigi peers out from his hair, a small smile forming from the king’s praise. Kamek picks up on the tension and decides to do some *matchmaking*.

 “Since our guest will be staying for a while, perhaps we should help him feel more comfortable with a tour of the kingdom…Bowser?”

“Papa, are you listening?”

Bowser breaks out of his trance, not even realising he was staring at the human. He couldn’t help it; he’s not seen that many and this one was just so fascinating.

“Ah, yes, a tour sounds great! If you would like one?”

Luigi thinks for a bit and nods. If he was wrong about the king, then maybe he was wrong about the kingdom and surface land and should give it a chance.

Kamek nods at that, pleased with his work. Kammy shoots him a thumbs up for his work.

Later, while Luigi is getting ready for bed, he watches Bowser with Junior as they play in the courtyard. Bowser notices him watching and waves at him. Embarrassed that he was caught, Luigi shyly waves back and backs away from the balcony. He’s wearing a cotton nightgown that Kammy had given him, as well as a glass of water from Kamek in case he gets thirsty during the night. This is also his first time laying in a bed, he’s never felt anything so soft in his life! He falls asleep as soon as he puts his head on the pillow, feeling a bit more hopeful after today.

Back in the ocean, Mario and his family are frantically searching for his brother, terrified that something bad happened to him. He decides to go to the surface land, specifically from the Mushroom Kingdom, and ask their princess for help and if he’s washed up there. It also helps that he’s heard so much about her kindness and beauty and…wake up Mario, focus on the mission at hand.

Back on the surface lands, Bowser takes Luigi on a tour of his kingdom, Polterpup by his feet through the all thing. At first, Luigi is still a bit unsure about the koopas, but soon he becomes a bit more curious. He goes up to some of the food stand giving away free sample and decides to try a little bit of fruit, it’s a bit tangy but still pretty good. He even sees a puppet show for the first time, not knowing how the little puppets are moving, he pulls one of a koopa’s hand, fascinated with how it works. A few koopa children then come up to him and ask to do his hair, having never seen another human before with his like his. He agrees and let the children tie up his hair in a French braid along with a few faux white flowers to go with the new dress he’s wearing. Bowser is watching from afar, his jaw dropping when Luigi’s hairstyle is revealed, his heart skipping a beat when Luigi does a twirl.

“Wow, you…you look beautiful greenie.”

Luigi blushes at the compliment.

The two suddenly hear music and see a few performers starting to play on their instruments as koopas, goombas and shy guys join in. Bowser takes Luigi’s hand and asks him to dance, the man nods his head, feeling a bit more at ease with the king now.

Soon the two join the crowd, laughing and having the time of their lives as they dance away to the music, Polterpup occasionally runs through some of the koopas legs.

When it ends, Bowser guides Luigi to a hidden river, the only place with water in the Darklands (apart from the shore). They share a little boat ride together as they share some of the food they bought at the market, while Polterpup takes a nap. Bowser then remembers that despite the time they shared together, he still doesn’t even know Luigi’s name.

“I feel terrible not knowing your name, and we don’t have anything that you can write with…Oh I know, how about I go down the alphabet and you pick out the letters of your name?”

Luigi nods and though it takes a while, the king manages to spell out his name.

“Luigi huh? A beautiful name for a beautiful human.”

Its Luigi’s turn for his heart to skip a beat. All his life he’d heard about the koopa kingdom and their dreaded king, now it turns out that he’s actually a gentleman who’s been showing him nothing but respect. Ever since this man washed up at his kingdom, Bowser has been feeling things that he’s never felt for anyone. Flustered, vulnerable and a need to protect and love. He’s never even felt this for Peach. The two start to lean in when their boat suddenly tips over, the two falling out. Bowser is quick to pick up Luigi, who begins to wring out his dress while Polterpup begins to shake his non-existent coat. As Bowser carries Luigi back as Polterpup floats beside them, the two fail to see two boos that were the ones who knocked over their boat.

Back in his lair, King Boo is seething!

“That blasted little shrimp! At this rate, these two will end up snogging all over the place and my plans will be ruined!”

He decides to go to his last resort, a mind control crown that he had hoped to use on one of the rulers to conquer the sea and surface, however this crown also held many of his other spells (including Luigi’s) and he wasn’t strong enough to use it more than once to use a spell as powerful as mind control. It was always extremely fragile, though he would still have some power, if it broke then all of his previous spells from over the years would be released, so he held it off for as long as he could, and it seems that now he has no other choice.

Meanwhile, Mario has finally arrived at the Mushroom Kingdom, hoping to find help with the princess. She’s just as beautiful in the rumours he’s heard about her. The princess is shocked to find an adorable red merman in a river near her palace, but she can’t deny his plea for help when he looked just so sweet.

“My brother, he’s gone missing! Is there any chance he’s been around here lately?”

“I’m sorry, you’re the only mer-person we’ve seen here. But don’t worry, we’ll keep a look out and help you find him!”

“Really?! Thank you, princess!”

“Y-you’re welcome.”

Back at the Darklands, Bowser is thinking about his new feelings for Luigi, not knowing if he should act on them since he didn’t want to betray his love for Peach. Kamek, fed up at this point, goes up to give Bowser his thoughts on the matter.

“If I may say sire, some people spend most of their time chasing after treasure on a map that leads them in circles, that they neglect that the diamond in the rough is right in front of them. Just a thought from a silly old koopa.”

As Kamek leaves, Bowser ponders over his surrogate father’s words. For years he’s yearned for Peach so the point that he became blinded by what he thought he wanted and put her on a pedestal. Now, there’s someone that doesn’t see him as a monster and might love him back. He makes his decision and starts to go to Luigi to tell him how he feels when he suddenly feels a weight on his head, and everything goes dark.

The next morning, Luigi wakes up feeling more refreshed and happier than he has since he first turned human. He’s been thinking all night about the maybe-kiss that he and Bowser were about to share and had been contemplating his feelings on the matter. He soon found himself realising that he would mind kissing Bowser, in fact, he would really like to kiss him and spend every day with him, Junior, Kammy and Kamek. Besides, there was nothing stopping him from travelling to see his brother and family, maybe it could all work out? He fell asleep last night with a smile on his face and butterflies in his stomach.

He’s about to run down the stairs to meet Bowser when he hides behind a pillar when he sees the king speaking with Kamek, wearing a strange crown.  

“Y-your highness, are you sure this is the best idea?”

“Peach castle is currently unprotected; it would be a good opportunity to strike and take her as my bride.”

“I see that, but after the last few days and our past with the Mushroom Kingdom, shouldn’t we think this through a little bit and-”

“-It has always been my intention to make Peach mine, no matter what and I won’t let anyone get in my way. Especially some scrawny human who washed up at my sure. Once the invasion is complete, the wedding will start immediately.”

“…very well sire.”

Luigi, heartbroken and betrayed, flees to his room, not knowing that King Boo was there the whole having used his ghostly-ness to remain invisible while controlling Bowser with the crown.

As Bowser takes off with his army and airship, Luigi stays behind at the port to cry as Polterpup tries to comfort him, having to face the truth that he was right in the first place, Bowser was just a heartless monster.

Junior is on the airship per his father’s orders to be at the wedding. He searches for his dad, wondering why he had the sudden change of heart about Luigi and his invasion. He creaks open the door to his father’s room when he sees King Boo in Bowser’s mirror, cackling to himself at the fact that his plans are nearly complete.

Realising his dad is being mind controlled by the strange ghost thing, he makes his way down to the clown cars and sneaks away in his own small one to get to Luigi as quickly as possible.

The Mushroom Kingdom is taken aback when Bowser suddenly arrives, not fully prepared for battle since he would usually leave some type of indication that he was coming, but here, he was just blasting through with every intention of not leaving until he gets what he wants. Mario wants to help but Peach tells him to stay hidden. Unable to just do nothing, Mario rushed as fast as he can to get back home to get his father.

As soon as Peach sees Bowser, there’s something different about his atmosphere, something way more menacing and demanding. As usual, he wants Peach to marry him, but this time he doesn’t ask.

“One way or another, you will marry me Peach and we’ll watch your kingdom turn to ash.”

“You’re not even going to bargain.”

“It’s not like you can do anything about it.”

A pit forms in Peach’s stomach, something’s wrong, very wrong.

Junior makes it back to, running to the sobbing man as fast as he can.

“Luigi! Luigi! There’s some weird ghost thing that was in my dad’s mirror! I think that’s why he’s attacking the Mushroom Kingdom so soon! What do we do?!”

Luigi’s eyes widen in horror. King Boo! He had to be behind all this. Without any second thoughts, Luigi climbs in Junior’s clown car, along with Polterpup, and the two head to the Mushroom Kingdom as fast as they can.

While Bowser/Boo is adamant about the wedding, the koopas there are a little less comfortable about it due to how strange and intimidating the king was acting. As the service starts, Peach pulls out an ice flower from her bouquet and attacks Bowser, she lands a few hits, but Bowser uses his fire to melt the ice. Peach keeps trying to fight though, at least to distract him while she thinks of a plan. The koopas also help, agreeing that their King was not himself and didn’t want anyone in the Mushroom Kingdom getting severely injured.

Luigi finally arrives with Junior, jumps out of the vehicle and lands on Bowser’s shoulders while he’s fighting Peach. Seeing a crown that wasn’t on Bowser’s head before, Luigi grabs it and smashes it to the ground, falling off Bowser’s shoulder from the impact of the throw.

Suddenly, Bowser sees himself at the Mushroom Kingdom, not knowing how he got there since the last place he remembered being was back home. Princess Peach and the koopas stop, sensing that Bowser’s atmosphere was back to normal as he looks towards Luigi.

“Luigi, are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine…wait…I can talk!”

“You can finally speak again!”

“My voice its back!”

“I don’t understand, what’s happening?”

“It’s King Boo, he-aahhh!”

Before he can get another word out, there’s a sharp pain in his legs. He fells his bones bending and breaking in the most painful way and King Boo suddenly appears, turning him back into a merman before he can get another word out. Luigi looks to Bowser, afraid of what he’ll think of the man once he realises what he really is. But Bowser is too wrapped up in shock of what its happening and worry for the man that he loves.

King Boo grabs Luigi and drags him back into the ocean, the latter screaming for Bowser as the koopa tries to grab him as Luigi is forced back into the water, Polterpup chasing after his new owner. The king turns to Princess Peach.

“Princess, I know this may be confusing, but I really need your help, please, I love him!”

“Don’t worry, I think I might know his brother and what’s going on.”

Back in the ocean, Luigi is struggling against King Boo, trying to escape his grasp but somehow, the ghost’s grip is tighter than he though. Polterpup tries to fight his old master but a few Boos that had been hiding easily grab him.

“Oh, don’t worry little shrimp, it ain’t you that I’m after.”

“KING BOO THAT IS ENOUGH!”

The pair stop when they see Luigi’s father, the King of the ocean along with Mario stop them in their path.

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t the red prince and the ruler of the seven seas.”

“Let my brother go!”

“No can do princey, precious little Lulu is all mine until you give me what I want.”

Luigi’s father growls at that.

“My son does not belong to you!”

He goes to use his magical trident, but a few boos grab Luigi and use some type of electricity on him, making the youngest prince scream out in pain.

“You see, the thing is your majesty, one wrong move and your precious little boy won’t be, how do I put this? Part of your world anymore.” (I am so sorry for that awful pun.)

The sea king was at a loss, he knew he would be putting everyone at risk by handing the trident and the throne to this made ghost but…he couldn’t lose his youngest son, from the corner of his eye, he could see Mario agree. He hands the trident over to King Boo, begging him not to hurt his son. With a mad gleam in his eye, he grabs the trident and lets Luigi go. To the green merman’s horror, the poltergeist points the artifact to his father and brother, watching in devastation as he turns them into dust.

With a strangled scream, he goes to attack King Boo, though surprised at Luigi’s reaction, manages to throw him to the ground. He’s about to use the trident on him when he suddenly feels something hit him. He looks up to see Bowser under the water, who had thrown a spear at him and raises the trident to him. In a moment of panic, Luigi grabs King Boo, making him point the trident at his boos instead and disintegrates them. Not wanting to witness King Boo’s anger, Luigi swims up to Bowser and guides him above the water, not witnessing the Boo’s fury with his new powers below him.

The koopa and merman reach the surface of the water, Bowser trying to reach out to Luigi.

“Bowser you have to go, now! Before King Boo gets you!”

“No, I’m not leaving you behind again!”

They feel a rumbling all around them. Suddenly, King Boo rises from the sea as a giant with the two on his head, cackling like a mad man. Bowser and Luigi jump back into the water, trying to escape until King Boo starts to form a whirlpool, separating them. Luigi falls into the whirlpool, landing at the bottom as Polterpup rushes over to him as King Boo taunts him.

Bowser is still paddling in the water, trying to get to Luigi when a ship comes up beside it. Inside was Princess Peach, some toads, koopas and Kamek. They throw a rope down to Bowser and help him up. Kamek looks to the king.

“I used my magic to help steer that boat but I’m barely holding on! I need you to guide the bowsprit and drive it into that mad boo!”

“But’s a ghost, he’s already dead!”

“I’ve managed to enchant so that I can trap him in this!”

Kamek holds up a pale purple gem, sparkling with some type of magic that the magikoopa used. Princess Peach then speaks up.

“I’m managing the sails while the toads and koopas are defending us! Bowser, are you able to guide the ship!”

“You can count on me Princess, take this as the beginning of a massive apology to you!”

Peach nods and everyone gets to work. King Boo is shooting at Luigi in the whirlpool, the merman trying to dodge as much as he can but knows that he is not strong enough to do anything. Enraged by what the Boo is doing to his love, Bowser drives the bowsprit into King Boo. The poltergeist screams with both pain and fear, knowing that if he can feel that then somehow, he has been defeated.

The seas calm down as the boo disappears into the gem. Bowser tries to look for Luigi, but the whirlpool is gone, and the merman is nowhere in sight. Kamek keeps him from jumping out as the princess guides the ship back to shore.

In the ocean, Luigi grabs the trident and rushes back over to where his father and brother were with Polterpup following him and sees the two have been returned to normal. Overjoyed, he hugs them both, all three of them crying now that Luigi is safe and home.

“I missed you so much Lu. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here when you went missing.”

“It’s okay Mario, I’m safe now, It’s okay.”

He gives the trident back to his father and the three mermen return home.

A few days later, Luigi is hiding behind a rock, Polterpup beside him as he watches Bowser from the shore of the Darklands, pining to see the merman again. Mario and his father watch from afar.

“You know, a while ago, Luigi would have fainted at the thought of going to the Darklands. Now, seeing how he looks at that koopa king, he’s gotten more braver than I ever imagined.”

“Peach told me that he jumped on Bowser’s shoulder’s just to get the crown off him.”

“Oh yes, how are you and that princess getting along?”

“Ah-I-wha-Dad!”

“I’m just teasing. Though, he hasn’t been truly himself since he came home.”

“I guess he left a part of himself since leaving the Darklands. After all, when you love someone, you give a piece of yourself to them, and in return, they grant you something even more freeing.”

“Then I guess there’s only one problem left.”

“And what’s that Dad?”

“…How much I’m going to miss him.” Mario raises an eyebrow in confusion for a moment before his father points his trident at Luigi.

Luigi feels a tingling sensation on his fins, looking down to see that there are no fins at all, his legs had returned! He turns to his father and brother, his smile beaming as the two nod to him.

Bowser is staring off into the distance, thinking about Luigi when he sees brown hair peeking out of the water. His heart stops when he sees Luigi emerging from the water in a sparkling green dress and his hair flowing in the wind. Bowser runs to him, picking him up and spinning him around in his arms and holds him as the two finally share a kiss.

A year later, the two are finally married on a giant ship, Luigi wearing a poofy wedding dress while Bowser is dressed in his finest suit. Luigi’s family and kingdom are watching from the ocean while toads and koopa finally come together as one. Princess Peach hugs Luigi, glad to have another human companion and blows a kiss to Mario in the ocean, who blushes at the gesture and waves back. Junior is also glad Luigi is back and is going to be his stepdad. He and Polterpup have also become close friends, the two playing together when they can. Kamek and Kammy are finally happy that Bowser has found love after all this time.

Mario asks his father to use to powers to lift him with the water to see his brother one more time. Luigi smiles softly and gives his brother a hug.

“Don’t cry big bro, I’ll see you after the honeymoon, you’re acting as if I’ll never see you again.”

“I’m sorry, its just, I’m so happy for you.”

“I love you, Mario.”

“I love you too Lu.”

He gives Bowser a menacing glare along the lines of ‘hurt my bro and I’ll end you’ before Peach comes over and kisses him on the cheek, making the red merman faint into the ocean. Luigi laughs at his brother’s antics as he waves goodbye to all the other mer-folk as the ship sails away to its next destination.

Bowser and Luigi give one another a soft look and share one more kiss.

The end.

You're allowed to yell at me for the shitty puns.

(Edit: also I love that you guys enjoyed it and you’re free to write something for this as it was only meant to be a drabble after having a bad day. As long as you credit and tag me, y’all can use this idea and write your own Bowuigi little mermaid fic ☺️)

[somethin-human]

*cough* aNYwAy!

Sam headcanons 🤠

As mentioned before, he was gifted a frog Build A Bear by one of the Shaw Pack mates. It’s name is Sammy and he has a little cowboy hat.

He has one (1) cowboy hat but he never wears it. He only has it because Vincent gifted it to him for some reason when they were first getting to know each other.

Before Darlin’ came into the picture, he had a pet dog.

He hates doing his weekly drink of blood because he thinks it’s gross so he has a little “fun” with it and uses a shot glass instead of drinking it from a bag.

Although vampires don’t need actual food to survive, he still has meals with Darlin’ so they don’t feel lonely or so that he makes sure they’re eating properly. He also just really likes the taste of his own cooking.

He’s very “traditional” when it comes to relationships. Like, when he met Darlin’, he felt the need to meet their family. Obviously we don’t really know much about Darlin’ family so the Shaw Pack was the next best thing.

His cabin doesn’t feel as southern as his vibes set out to be. Darlin’ was really surprised to see the lack of taxidermy and animal skulls hung up on his wall.

Addition to home decor, he has a lot of fake plants because this man has no idea how tf to keep a plant alive to save his life, but he wants his home to feel alive in a way.

He doesn’t own a lot of sweaters, but he does have a SH*T ton of flannels. Like a very very concerning amount of them.

I could be wrong but I think I remember seeing on the timeline that Sam didn’t have a good home life growing up. When he left, he did take a photo of his family because he genuinely does miss them in a way, but would never come to visit (nor could he because he’s a vampire and all that).

When him and Darlin’ moved in together, he thought about getting a dog, but when Darlin’s wolf fur started getting everywhere, he decided to pass on it.

He’s deathly afraid of chickens.

He’s thought about wanting kids but after having to take care of Darlin’, he doesn’t feel the need to anymore lmao.

He has a picture of his first party (whatever the vampire party was called) with the clan. He absolutely hates seeing himself in a suit, but Darlin’ loves it and thinks he looks “very pretty”, in their words.

He sleeps on his stomach. Whenever he wakes up, he’s always super sprawled out, the blanket isn’t even on him anymore.

I’m pretty sure this is already canon, but his favorite season is autumn/fall. He just likes the colors and how it’s not really as sunny outside so he’s able to sit on his porch during the day.

Sam can sing. Like really well. The first time he actually sung around people was during a little meet up with the Shaw Pack and they did Karaoke. He sung River by BRKN LOVE, as Darlin’ requested and they absolutely fell more in love with him.

I feel like Darlin’ also got him into Hozier but the only songs he religiously listens to is Would That I, Like Real People Do, and Cherry Wine (but specifically the live version).

He HATES dancing. Absolutely hates it. The most he’ll do is tap his foot or sway a little bit.

Definitely gives the absolute best hugs. He’s a tall, little bit chonky guy. He gives the most perfect bear hugs.

Also because he’s not an actual prince, but is a duke of the Solaire Clan, William got him a custom made broach. He’s very grateful for it and never wears it. He leaves it in the box on his dresser with his other important trinkets and photos.

He has a box full of random stuff that Darlin’ has collected over the years from the forest.

[sleepdeprivedsimp234]

hiii :3

do you have any phobia headcanons for the main 6?

Ah yes hello small child yes I do have some phobia hc’s for the sillies :3

Cali:

Pyrophobia: the overwhelming fear of fire (this one’s pretty obvious as to why)

Hemophobia: the fear of blood (idk he just gives the vibe of someone that HATES the sight of blood)

Cynophobia: the fear of dogs (he seems like the type of person to have a deathly fear of dogs)

Florida:

Dentophobia: fear of dentists (….I genuinely have no explanation for this one-)

Lilapsophobia: fear of hurricanes and tornadoes (no matter how much he enjoys the chaos, he also is afraid cuz it hurts and he knows that people are dying or being misplaced)

Gov:

Scoptophobia: the fear of being stared at (listen he’s awake 24/7, you CANNOT tell me that he doesn’t hallucinate and that those hallucinations don’t include illusions of "people" and "creatures" staring down at him. Haunting him. He fuckin hates being stared at now cuz whenever he’s being stared at he goes back to those dark lonely nights.)

Somniphobia: fear of sleep (this one is also kinda obvious I think-)

Texas:

Trypanophobia: fear of needles/injections (…he really hates needles for some reason and anytime he’s needed something done that involved needles, Gov or whoever came with him had to hold him still so that CDC could do what he needed to do.)

Nosocomephobia: fear of hospitals (he has A LOT of doctor-related fears. Ain’t it ironic that he’s one of the statehouse doctors (other one being Mass).)

Lilapsophobia: Fear of tornadoes and hurricanes (From Galveston to Harvey, and Waco to Saragossa to Jarrell, he’s TERRIFIED of tornadoes and hurricanes. And yet he still watches them.)

Tomophobia: fear of surgery (he hates the idea of it and it’s also the reason that he hasn’t gotten top surgery.)

Agoraphobia: fear of crowds and crowded open spaces (it gives him SO MUCH ANXIETY AND HE HAS HAD SO MANY PANIC/ANXIETY ATTACKS.)

New York:

Pyrohobia: fear of fire (with how many incidents that involved fire, yeah.)

Aerophobia: the fear of flying/planes (….I’m not gonna explain this one cuz of how obvious it is-)

Agoraphobia: fear of crowds and crowded open spaces (hence why he has a love-hate relationship with the city)

Astraphobia: the fear of thunder/lightning (it’s loud and bright and scares him)

Atychiphobia: the fear of failure (*looks at England*)

Louisiana:

Achluophobia: the fear of darkness (this is when the spirits like to attack him the most)

Daemonophobia: the fear of demons (pretty obvious imo. little does he know, the demons are more afraid of him than he is of them.)

Lilapsophobia (I’m not defining this one again just look at Texas and Florida’s lists lmao /lhj)

Phasmophobia: the fear of ghosts/spirits (they hurt him and torment him.)

[rabidskunkz]

ANTI-COSMO HEADCANNONS!

Hell yeah, AC head-cannon time! Again you can use these if you want or share your own thoughts on them. I’m dreading tomorrow so thought I’d do some more FOP stuff yay.

Headcannon times!

Anti-Cosmo is the (human) equivalent to 39 years old.

He is Demi-AroAce , only ever having his heart on AW

He is deathly afraid of spiders and is incredibly embarrassed about it

His bowler hat is a family heirloom that has been passed down for many many generations, originally made by the original Anti-Cosma family member. (AKA his great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandfather)

He is shorter than Anti-Wanda by a few inches

His bowler hat also has special spells on it to prevent certain injuries or attacks to the wearer. It is tradition for each Anti-Cosma family heir to add one spell to the hat for the next generation when they are gifted the hat.

He is a massive comic book geek

He is a sucker for sappy romantic movies and cries into Anti-wanda’s chest when it gets emotional

He has dyscalculia and often has help with any mathematical problems

His fangs fall out once a year in an almost “rutting season” (all male anti-fairies get it)

He prefers cats over dogs

When working in his study, he has a habit of listening to classical music loudly.

Though very much egotistical and cocky, he always lets Anti-Wanda and/or Foop win board games or cards on family nights even though he could beat them easily

He has to wear earplugs at night cos he can’t sleep with Anti-Wanda’s snoring - especially when she’s the big spoon (which is 99% of the time)

He has lots of posters of horror movies on his old childhood bedroom as he was a massive horror fan growing up.

He became Anti-Fairy world supreme leader at around the (human) equivalent of 19 years old

He is very skilled at piano, organ and violin

His clothes are custom made for him at the finest tailor shop in Anti-Fairy World

He has a small hold in one ear from having it pierced as a teen and he regrets it

Yay! I hope they were kinda interesting. I have more AW HCs than AC HCs cos I’m a AW Stan fr. Enjoy :)

And of course, the bonus “adult” headcannon is…

He has a very minimal libido but when it hits, it’s very extreme

[1u11ablues]

2/Cotton Candy and Racing Hearts(Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick x Reader)

Prompt: Trust Issues, Amusement Park, Role Reversal

Warnings: Fear of heights, hints of past trauma

The sweet smell of cotton candy teased your senses, its slender finger beckoning you to one of the many carts of fast food littering the amusement park.

You tug at his hands.

“C’mon, babe. A snack for our Ferris ride.”

Kyle Garric had very rarely uttered no when it comes to you. So he let you led him to the cart and paid for the glittery yellow snack while you pay for his generously dusted-with-icing-sugar funnel cake.

That’s how it has always been. Give and take.

It took half of the snacks for the both of you to reach the Ferris Wheel and get in line for it.

But as your turn loomed near, Kyle had gotten quieter, the last quarter of his snack untouched.

“Are you okay? Gaz?”

The bracelet you wore dangled over his eyes as you caressed the sides of his head.

“Last time we went here, it wasn’t this tall, love.”

You followed his gaze towards the Ferris Wheel. Once upon a time, you were deathly afraid of the ride itself—a result from some traumatizing childhood experiences—but Gaz was so patient with your desire to overcome it that a trip to the amusement park had become an annual thing for the both of you. Well, except when he’s away for deployment.

The last one weren’t too kind to him. And that was an understatement.

It wore him off helicopters for some time. And you understood.

“We can skip it this year, okay?”

He shook his head. “If you can overcome yours, I can do mine.”

The confidence he wore doesn’t follow him at the topmost point of the Wheel, however.

“How long has it been since they’ve serviced this thing?” A creak. His lips paled. “Honey, I feel like we’re going off-axis.”

A quick glance tells you that the ride was working perfectly fine, but you didn’t make any quick moves disproving his theories.

God knows what was replaying in his mind for someone to just dismiss it like that.

So you took the distraction course.

“Babe, there’s this really nice corn dog stand right near the Merry-Go-Round. Think you have space for something savoury after this?”

You pointed out to the distance, at the red parasol of the stand, trying to prompt him to take his eyes off the mechanical makings of the Ferris Wheel.

“Don’t laugh, but my heart is beating really fast, and I think I’m going to be sick.”

You reached out from your seat to close his eyes with your hands.

“Don’t think about anything for now. Open your mouth.”

You feed him a piece of cotton candy and let it melt on his tongue.

“What does that taste like? Not your usual plain sugar, isn’t it?”

His head shook behind your palms.

 “No,” he answered, “it’s citrusy. Was that lemon?”

“Yeah! Was that better than plain ones? There’s grape and strawberry too, I think. Can we try to get other flavours after this?”

He snorted. “What will your dentist say to that?”

“I’m not saying anything if you promised not to?” 

That earned a chuckle out of him. And, God help you, but being so close to his lips like these made it so easy for you to just lean in for a kiss. Or five. Just a little shy of a full on make-out.

Pretty soon, the gondola you were in lowered bit by bit, solid ground a comfortable height for you to remove your hands from his eyes.

“That felt like time travel,” he explained, pleasantly surprised. A bit breathless from your activity. “Thank you, love.”

“Grape floss and two corn dogs as your reward?”

[churchobones]

DWC DAY 1: CASUALTY/FLIRT

|| NEXT>>

It was as Thil’s frosted glass emptied that he flirted with a ghost. “Well, ain’t you a shiny lookin’ coin!  Last I saw you, you were an ad for dead!  What happened?! ” "Like I said, I slipped the noose," Bruce mused as he ran a hand along his well-trimmed beard. Clearly, Kallarel wasn't the only one who took pride in her appearance; vanity ran deep in the glossy hair and nourished lips-- which turned up at the corners, despite his poorly feigned reluctance. "But if you're really curious...It weren't long after you got me in that I found 'im. Zelion Mournvalor. Does the name ring a bell?"

He was a slight thing; the enigmatic nature of elf age aside, he might have looked like a teenager who never had a growth spurt, stunted at five and a half feet tall.  His features were pale and pretty, almost cherubic were it not for the deathly glow off his blue eyes.  Shoulder length, jet black hair was neatly tied back in a tail, lest it get in his way.

It was as though he stepped out of the painting in that dilapidated estate; a cross between a proud father and a stern child.

“Mister Hawkins,” his voice was soft to match his size as he called the dog by the name the witch used.  “So nice you could make it.”

"Picture this: Two men meet in an extravagant ballroom, with shiny floors and every footfall echoing off  the thirty foot ceiling. Him: black void crystals swirling around his head and flanked by twelve guards. Me: well, I've always been a lone wolf, haven't I? Truth is, I wasn’t afraid to die. Never have been."

"Please, call me Bruce," he replied with a geniality befitting his working class accent. "I'm afraid Miss Mournin’vale didn't tell me your name," he went on, only for a haunting echo to finish the thought.

The stench of bloodstained stone walls and stale fear filled his nose once more. There's a lot of things Miss Mournin’vale didn't tell you, isn't there?

Bruce loosened his cuffs.

"But the nose don't lie. I could smell it on him the moment our eyes met: fear. Him an' all his men. They knew they were up against a thing of legends and nightmares.

“Bruce.”  It slipped awkwardly off the elf’s tongue; a word too stupid and thick for his delicate vernacular, but he was paid the courtesy all the same.  The little lord spread his hands in a gesture of momentary peace.  “Zelion Mournvalor.  Charmed, I’m sure.”

The Lord’s soldiers nickered and rumbled like stallions, the rattle of metal on metal as loud as their jangling nerves.  The ballroom cleared, they formed a quivering line behind Zelion.  The lord’s knights had grown fat and complacent, casualties waiting to happen.

"Let's talk," Bruce called across the room.

“But... it weren’t fear which plunged my heart like a knife. It was that this-- this pretty, petty asshole should know so much more about Kallarel than I ever would. And that I should be reduced to grovelin’ at his feet for answers.”

“Certainly… Bruce. And what is it you would care to talk about?”

He took a few steps forward.

“How Miss Mourningvale enabled the downfall of my family estate?”  Zelion tipped his head towards his right shoulder.  “How she stole and bastardized my family name?”  And then to his left before straightening with a raising of his chin.  “How she murdered my mother and father?”

"She did you a favor. They looked like a roight coupla pricks."

"S'alrigh," Bruce went on, stopping a conversational distance from the elf. "I come from pricks too. You knew her growin' up then? Did ya call 'er auntie Kallarel?"

Zelion’s chin tilted at the implication, upwards and defiant as this woeful creature dared to suggest a commonality between them.  “No, though I suppose I might have called her girl in passing, once or twice… but father didn’t make a habit of introducing us to his whores.”  

Bruce’s eyes narrowed. “If that’s all she is to you, why all the trouble? Why send assassins?”

“Assassins? Oh, no my hounds weren’t sent to kill, but to fetch.  Well, her.  Failing to kill you was an oversight already paid for.”

"You haven't paid for it yet," Bruce replied with some amusement. “I'm gonna break your pre'y lil nose for calling my girlfriend a whore."

Zelion batted his eyes.  “Oh?”

“I know there's things Kallarel will never tell me. You showed me that when you opened the way to that damnable basement in her old shop.”

"Is that where she got a taste for huntin' men for sport?" the Gilnean guessed, unbuttoning his black embroidered vest.. "Your asshole dad?"

“Of course not,” the dainty elf answered, taking a keen interest in the infection bubbling around Bruce’s clumsily placed crystal as he continued to disrobe.  In turn, Zelion removed his chain of state, taking time to ensure it was properly folded at each connecting point before dropping it into his coat pocket for safe keeping. “But even a filthy satyr in a dead slut’s skin needs to feed.”

@daily-writing-challenge

[sillypuppetmeister]

FUCK HAPPINESS *throws headcanons at you.*

After Telemachus visited Ithaca again, he stole some of Antinous' furs, 1. because he wanted to be salty, and 2. because he still did like him.

Eurymachus was planning on asking Antinous out mere hours before his death, but a certain boy came in..

Every time Tele sees Cerberus, he remembers Argos. He knew he was a traitor, but he still loved that dog. He still loved his family. But they betrayed him? How could he love them.. after all they've done?

tw for this one: Telemachus was planning on starving himself so everyone could be peaceful and happy without him, before the hellhounds and Zagreus came.

Everytime he passes souls of the Trojans and Ody's crew, he gives them a good morning, evening, and night, no matter if they look at him weird.

Telemachus is afraid of drowning, knowing he can't drown, exactly like Percy. Sometimes he WISHES he could drown. Like that one line: "The last thing I remembered was sinking in a burning sea, knowing that Tyson was gone forever, and wishing I were able to drown."

Telemachus is immune to the underworld river waters now, but he is deathly afraid of the Lethe.

oh hey what the hell /mega positive but also ….🙁☹️

antinous never forgave telemachus for what happened to eurymachus, ik i forgot to finish writing it (😭) but if antinous did manage to get eurymachus back from the dead then i think he wouldn’t outright hate telemachus but there’d still be a part of him that did for a while.

the cerberus/argos one… ouhghhh… my heart….. the water hcs remind me of his dad i’m so 🙁🙁🙁

these are so good,, grrahhhh….

[fandomnsfw]

Not The Same Little Kid PT.5 -Carl Grimes x Reader

Pairing: Carl Grimes x Reader

Prompt: I re-read the first four chapters and was inspired.

Warnings: violence, threats, Daryl being a dad and fluff.

ENJOY!!!

**********

Previously on Not the same little kid...

“You seriously wanna air our bedroom shit right now?” He muttered threateningly and you remembered how you two had experimented with a few sexual fantasies when you’d first started dating.

“Back off William.” Carl growled as his arm dropped from around you as he shook off your hold, getting ready for a fight.

“Hell, with how close you two look I’m sure you know what a freak in the bedroom she can be, huh Grimes?” Carl was on Will in seconds and you couldn’t do anything.

This was gonna be bad.

***********

“Shit! William get off him!” Will had managed to wrangle Carl onto the ground, punching him twice but the second Carl heard your voice he threw him off and landed hit after hit on your ex, as if he was trying to prove something.

“Carl he’s had enough!” You screamed as you saw Daryl and Rick running over to the scene.

“What the hell is goin’ on here?!” Rick screamed making the two men jump apart as they adjusted their clothes and wiped the blood from there mouths.

“Keep your boy on a leash!” Will screamed angrily and Carl went to launch at him again but Daryl grabbed him quickly.

“I think ya’ made ya’ point Carl…let it go.” Daryl grumbled with mild humour in his voice.

“Do ya’self a favour Will. Don’t talk about her, don’t look at her, in fact ya’ know what don’t even think about her! Or you’ll find out where my son gets his temper…understood!?” Rick screamed in Will’s face and he looked deathly afraid, his head nodding in agreement before he scurried off with his tail between his legs.

“Boy if I have to break another fight up after this…” Rick warns his son and Carl just rolls his eyes.

“He was chatting shit about her inappropriately you’d of done worse.” Carl argued and Rick shot you a look as if asking if it was true so you nodded with a blush on your face as you realised how many people were actually watching.

“One more strike he’s out.” Rick informs Darl who nods in agreement. You turned to Carl with a glare before spinning round and walking back towards the house making Carl sigh loudly before chasing after you quickly.

“Darlin’ I’m sorry but would you of stood there and listened to that? If the roles were reversed?” Carl asked gently and he lightly jogged to keep up with your angry speed walking.

“So you’re asking if Enid started chatting shit about you and her in bedroom in public would I beat her ass?” You scoffed softly making him nod like he was possibly going to win this debate.

“No I wouldn’t because I know I can please you better than she could and that’s good enough for me.” You argued seriously and his face dropped.

“Aww come on! You’re telling me you wouldn’t even slap her?” Carl exclaimed with raised brows.

“No but I might slap you if you continue trying convince me what you did was right.” You challenged with one raised brow daring him to test you.

“Yes Ma’am. Shutting up.” Carl stated as he contained walking next to you.

You were almost at the house when you heard a voice across the street shout you name. You looked over and saw Rosita jogging over towards you and Carl. Her two french braids fluttering behind her as she did.

“Hey I heard there was a fight…Are you okay?” Rosita asked softly and you let out an exasperated sigh.

“We’re barely home how the hell did you hear that so fast! Jesus Christ this is why I never liked shows with small towns. Too much gossip.” You rolled your eyes earning a laugh from both Rosita and Carl.

“You best wipe that smile right off your face Grimes. You’re still in the dog house.” You grumbled as Rosita started laughing more when Carl’s face went from humour or horror in seconds.

“We’re having girls night tonight if you want in. Think we’re having at your place anyway so…” Rosita muttered with a small smile.

“Sounds good.” You chuckled and Carl pouted next to you, your smile almost breaking through at how cute he was but you managed to keep a straight face.

“Guess my father and I will be banished to our rooms.” Carl huffed sassily and you shot him a smirk before wiggling your brows at Rosita who just chuckled claiming she had alcohol to hunt down as she jogged away.

**********

“So how is it going with Carl?” Maggie whispered softly as Michonne exited the room to grab another drink from the kitchen.

“Really good…he’s…sweet, smart and weirdly for someone younger than me he really looks after me.” You muttered shyly making Rosita and Maggie giggle at your flushed cheeks.

“I heard Michonne found him in your room after your first date.” Rosita teased earning a laugh from the other women.

“Oh my god…we didn’t hav-we only got to second base okay?” You stuttered quietly before looking up to see Michonne enter the room.

“Let me guess you were talking about Carl?” Michonne snorted as she saw how quiet everyone had gotten.

“I’m happy for you guys just so you know I think you’re good for each other.” She added before lifting her glass in a toast making everyone laugh in relief.

The rest of the girls night went smoothly allowing you to unwind and release the stress that had pent up for the past few days. It was exactly what you needed you thought happily as you stumbled upstairs with a smile as your eyes flickered between your room and Carl’s.

You let out a tipsy giggle as you knocked on his door which immediately opened revealing a half dressed Carl Grimes, the sight causing your heart to flutter and your thighs to clench. He looked you up and down with a smirk before letting you into his bedroom.

“Hi darlin’.” He muttered huskily as he pulled you into his arms.

“You’re so beautiful and sexy.” You whispered playfully as your hand skimmed down his bare chest.

“Why thank you. I could say the same sweetheart.” He snorted happily as he pulled your towards his bed but not before helping you take off your playsuit leaving you in your undies.

“Are you seducing me Mr Grimes?” You gasped dramatically.

“No I’m getting you ready for bed baby. You’re drunk and I’m not going to touch you while you’re like this.” He informed you softly as he threw one of his t-shirts over your bra covered torso before exiting his room to his private bathroom.

“Aww such a gentlemen.” You giggle with a pout gracing your face which was literally wiped away as Carl came back into the room with a bowl of water and a cloth.

However before you could ask what he needed that for he started wiping off your makeup with surprising amount of gentleness for his large hands. You looked at him in shock as he finally pulled away from your now clean lips.

“Close your eyes darlin’.” He whispered absently as he rinsed the cloth in the bowl of warm water. You closed your eyes as he instructed but not before a single tear fell down your face making him gasp in shock.

“Woah…was I too rough baby? I’m sorry.” He choked out making you open your eyes to really look at him.

“No…you Carl Grimes are the most amazing, beautiful, gentle and kind man I’ve ever met…I’m just wondering what I did to deserve you.” You chuckled softly making his eyes widen in shock.

“I don’t know about all that but I know how perfect you are in my eyes. I’ve had the biggest crush on you since I got here but you were way too old for me so I never showed it. Then well on my 18th birthday I figured I’d stop hiding it. I find it just as amazing that you even like me.” He answered happily as he placed a kiss on your forehead.

“I really really like you.” You added with as much seriousness as you could muster his eye instantly widening again as he took in your words before smiling softly.

“I really really like you too.” He replied instantly before pulling you in for the sweetest little kissed you’d ever experienced.

As you opened your eyes you were met with the angelic sleeping face of your boyfriend, bringing an instant smile to your face. You’d not felt like this for anyone in a long time, if you ever had at all. His freckles shone under the suns orange glow, your hand reaching up to tuck his hair behind his ear revealing his eye socket.

You had never seen it before but instead of shock you felt relief that he had survived such odds. You smiled to yourself as you traced around his scarring with your index finger, before kissing around it but the second his other eye flicked open Carl jolted back in shock.

“Don’t do that, it’s disgusting.” He whispered with a frown covering it with his hair once again.

“No it’s not. It shows you’re a survivor, that you beat the odds and it makes me happy you did or I wouldn’t have you now.” You told him sternly before pulling him back to you.

“Don’t ever hide from me.” You added before bringing him in for a kiss making him relax instantly.

“You’re something else Y/N Y/L/N.” He chuckled as you pulled away.

“I’ll take that as a compliment Mr Grimes.” You giggled playfully as you hopped out of bed.

“Mhmm don’t forget we’ve got a run today.” Carl shouted as you ran out his room with your clothes in hand.

You stopped in front of the pharmacy with a raised brow silently wondering if anything would even be left after all this time. However instead of Carl answering your silent question he snipped open the door with bolt cutters before banging on the door a few times.

When no walkers appeared you both wandered into the small drug store with weapons raised on the off chance anything went wrong. It wasn’t just walkers people had to be careful of anymore, it was people too.

“You get the stuff on the list I’m gonna look around for other stuff that might be helpful. Be careful.” Carl whispered softly, his hand coming down to casually stroke the back of your hair, instantly bringing a smile to your face.

“You too handsome.” You giggled shooting him a smile before wandering off to get everything Denise needed.

As you grabbed the last item on the list you lowered your gun and turned around to shout to Carl but before you could make a sound a hard object came down across your head.

*********

When you came to, the sight of your boyfriend and his worried face was the first thing you saw. You had no idea what was happening but seeing his face made you calm down knowing he was safe for now.

“Glad you could finally join us gorgeous.” A deep voice whispered in your ear making you freeze.

“She is pretty maybe the boss will make her another wife?” Someone asked next to Carl making his struggle against them.

“Calm down kid we’re not gonna hurt your friend.” The guy behind you stated with a evil chuckled.

“Girlfriend.” You huffed through gritted teeth.

“I’m sorry I thought I heard you say you were this kids girlfriend. I must need my ears cleaning.” The guy behind me laughed his thick accent making you frown.

“Baby don’t talk to them. There just trying to antagonise you.” Carl muttered softly before his eye scanned you over checking you were okay.

“Ain’t that sweet Dwight.” The guy holding Carl chuckled.

“Yeah so fucki-”

Before the asshole behind you could finish his sentence Carls head swung back and smacked his capturer straight in his nose. You instantly ducked down slipping out of the man called Dwight’s hold before running straight to Carl as a shot rang out around you.

“Well well well. If it ain’t back stabbing lil’ Dwighty boy.” Daryl huffed with a glare on his face as you checked on Carl making sure he wasn’t hurt.

His lip was bleeding and he had a small cut above his brow but apart from that he seemed okay. You immediately slapped his arm repeatedly as tears built in your eyes.

“I’m fine darlin’.” Carl whispered as he took you into his arms.

“I-Idiot!” You sobbed into his flannel shirt, his fingers running through your hair in a soothing manner.

“I really really like you too.” Carl whispered in your ear his words making you look up at him.

His stunning blue eye looked straight into your Y/E/C ones, the seriousness of his expression made you realise you didn’t just like him. In the few days you’d been together you now understood you were falling hard and fast for this man and the thought scared you, especially in a world like this.

Nothing was ever certain especially not survival but that could never stop someone’s feelings. Maybe the end of the world was actually the reason everyone should give in to their feelings.

“I-I really really like you…” You muttered to the tall perfect man in front of you. He stared at you for a moment before realising you meant something else and to say Carl was shocked was an understatement but instead of allowing him to respond you turned away and focused on Daryl and his next words.

“I’m gonna give you three seconds to give me my cross bow and apologise to my kid.” He muttered as his gun pressed against Dwight’s skull.

“Sorry kid.” He said towards Carl making you smirk realising instantly he didn’t mean Carl.

“Actually that’s my boy.” Rick smirked at the man that had been holding Carl back.

“The girl?! Seriously? There’s no way that a red neck like yo-”

“You shut your filthy trailer trash mouth before I beat you!” You screamed as you tried to launch at Dwight, only to be held back by familiar long fingers.

“Never mind I see where she gets her mouth.” Dwight sniggers sarcastically making you squirm in Carl’s hold.

“I can let her go if you want but it’s your funeral.” Carl snarled as his arms loosened around your waist.

“Fine I’m sorry. And you can have your cross bow.” Dwight huffed angrily making Daryl growl at the poor excuse of an apology.

“He said his boss would make Y/N his wife. I ain’t letting him go, he needs to die.” Carls voice rang out making your eyes widen.

“I won’t even tell my boss about this jesus kid! Though he’d like you.” Dwight snorted at Carl making Rick’s face drop.

“You’re really not helping yourself right now Dwighty boy.” Daryl huffed impatiently, his gun pressing Ito the back of his head more harshly.

“I say we let them go but I want the cigarettes.” You smirked as Dwight looked at you with disdain.

“Fine you heard the lady.” Rick sighed with an eye roll as he gave you a small amused smile before shoving the bloody nosed guy at Dwight.

As Daryl pulled up to the gates you hoped off his bike with and quick thanks before scurrying off to the Grime house ahead of both Rick and Carl. You gave a few nods to the other members of Alexandria avoiding any conversation that would stop you.

Once inside the house you ran upstairs to your designated room and slammed the door shut. Why the holy hell did you say it like that!? You thought to yourself angrily. He obviously knew you didn’t just mean like!

You were pacing your room as thought about a way you could avoid this next conversation, wishing you hadn’t said it like that.

Yes you were falling for him but it was too soon and Carl was still so young, he had his whole life ahead of him and yes it wasn’t like you were holding him back from college or anything but there are plenty of others fish especially ones more his age.

You expected a knock maybe even for him to not even bother with you however you had not expected him to just walk straight into your bedroom.

“Ya’ know it’s rude to walk into a lady’s roo-”

“Did I misunderstand what was between the lines?” Carl interrupted as he slammed your bedroom door shut.

“I-I don’t know what you mean…”

“Don’t do that.” His voice interrupted once again, his eye looking you up and down.

“No you didn’t misinterpret it. Carl Grimes in the space of 4 days you have been there for me more than Will was in the space of 3 years. I don’t think I could bear to lose you now…my heart would-”

Before you could finish your sentence he launched at you his hand cupping your cheeks, his lips melting into yours as his eye closed.

You whimpered into the kiss, the pure shock at not only your own words but his forceful yet passionate actions. You melted into the kiss, your hands clutching the flannel shirt with enough force you thought it would rip. After a few minutes of getting lost in his kisses he pulled away and looked into your eyes.

“God you are so beautiful.” Carl whispered in amazement as he smiled softly.

“I can’t believe you I get to have you…” You whispered in pure shock.

“I can’t believe someone as beautiful and strong is falling for me. I thought I’d be waiting years for you to like me this much, if you ever did.” Carl chuckled as he pulled you into his embrace.

“I think you solely underestimate yourself Mr Grimes. You’re handsome, charming, romantic, unafraid to show you affection outside of the house and not to mention how amazing your R rated skills are.” You whispered the last part with a flirty smile.

“Oh is that so Miss Y/L/N? Maybe I should try out a few new things I’ve been wanting to.” He growled playfully making you smirk at the insinuation.

“By all means Mr Grimes play with me all you want.” You giggled as you escaped his arms and ran toward your bed.

“You’re a little minx.” Carl chuckled darkly before making sure the door was locked before making his way over to you.

Part 4 <- -> Part 6

[csmeanerr]

Mod Shit, I get it if you don’t post this one for reasons that are about to be obvious, but re the $900 Fooling. (I agree it’s superior to the 20K Grem and most Chams, but with a single colored winged dog with a halo, that’s not saying much. At least Lu is going to do extra art due to the high price, more than what a lot of CS owners would do…)

When it comes to high-cost CS, I often hear shit like, “support artists!” and “they gotta eat, too”, “get that coin!”. Or whatever excuse. Mother fuckers spend shittons on CS designs. You aren’t supporting shit. You’re buying into clout and manipulative FOMO tactics. OK, yeah, someone’s making rent or whatever, but admit it: if that $900 Fooling (or whatever) wasn’t a CS, you’d be cackling at the person who bought it.

CRICKETS when artists who don’t use manipulative FOMO tactics put out comms or adopts. Sometimes even relatively popular artists struggle. So much for supporting artists, right?

I want to use this opportunity to show you what $900 can get you in art if you’re so inclined to kick clout-chasing to the curb, but still want to shake dollars at artists. The artists I’ve selected are random faves of mine and I’m not affiliated with them. They’re chosen to give you an idea of what you could get for $900 instead of a fucking dog.

sariyaart on Carrd: $900 is almost certainly going to get you a painted full body. PAINTED. As in, fully-rendered, in a mostly-realistic style.

Aspeneyes on Weebly: $900 will get you a full illustration since these start around $400

Nebquerna on Carrd: $900 could get you two or three concept sheets or custom designs

BlindCoyote: $900 is about enough for a full illustration, and definitely enough for a shaded colored sketch

Godbirdart: $900 will get you a full illustration

I know we often compare prices of stuff other than art to demonstrate what a rip off CS is. I think it’s even more demonstrative to compare prices (and quality!) to what other artists do. The artists I’ve listed above are professional freelancers, by the way, either part time or full time.

I remember someone once joking that the 20K thing was all Caravan’s fault because no artist could be expected to produce work good enough to justify that amount of money. Aside from the fact that the artist shouldn’t fucking take that money, then, and show some integrity, I guarantee you any one of those artists above would produce something spectacular. Hell, at that price, they’d probably agree to some sort of commercial rights.

But yeah, $900 for a dog with wings and a halo is totally at the same level of these other artists.

post related

a note to add to this is that cs often artificially inflate value with traits and artificial scarcity while also actively undervaluing other artist’s. they’re even aware that the artificial scarcity is the highest reason people buy since it’s developed this toxic mindset that no one else can have the same idea.  if people can make the same thing then they won’t buy theirs, not because people might buy from the merit of their work but because they slapped on so many labels such as ‘official’ and ‘rare traits’

have the gall to cry about having to make so many adopts on a base while people who buy them draw entire fullbody drawings with backgrounds for 5 pieces of artificial currency

most cs are so deathly afraid of making things easy to get because it’s hyped up by the artificial scarcity. would cypherus grems be as tempting if people could just make one? would a cow girl oc perk your interest as much if it wasn’t followed by ‘biia-made mal’accilin’? these artists are genuinely skilled and talented and DO deserve a high degree of respect skill-wise to get where they are, but they grow themselves higher by pushing others down and that’s just not right

[kutie106]

okay here are my assumptions!!

your favorite season is summer

you have/want a pet dog / are a dog person

you’re an extrovert

these 3 things kind of have a similar vibe in my mind so i feel like if i’m wrong about 1 of them i’m wrong about all of them but we’ll see!

Ooh thanks! 1. Close, it's fall, but only because all the bees are hibernating and I am deathly afraid of bees 2. Yep, I have 2 dogs, and I am 100% a dog person, I love them :)

3. It's changed over time, I'd say I'm more of an ambivert now, but that was definitely true a few years ago

Honestly, I think you described younger me perfectly though lol

[roanrosser]

Pre-order now open! Release Date August 6th! Part of the Friends of Gaynor Beach Animal Rescue MM Romance series.

https://books2read.com/RuffStart

Sawyer

I’m deathly afraid of dogs, so why am I signing up to volunteer at an animal shelter?

When my therapist sends me to the newly opened Safe Haven Animal Rescue to get up close to a dog in a safe environment, my nerves almost get the best of me in the lobby. But a run-in with a handsome employee makes putting up with the terror worth it. I’m so besotted, that before I know it, I’m signing up to be a volunteer at the shelter.

Neil

Crushing hard on my first volunteer is not a good way to start my new job as a volunteer coordinator.

When he starts flirting with me, I shut him down despite his pushing all my buttons. Yet the more time we spend together, the more my crush deepens, and the more I regret staying so professional. But even if I do jump despite the consequences, will he still be interested when he finds out I’m trans?

Ruff Start is a slow-burn gay romance novel between a work-a-holic corporate professional and a laid back artist who needs to learn when to ask for help.

[st4rfckerz]

Happy May the 4th, Nai!!

Are you celebrating? I watched Tales of the Empire this morning, really good, but I preferred Tales of the Jedi bc I’m a sucker for the hood guys. and now I’m on the bus, I’m seeing TPM in cinema!

HELP, I got a subway and put it in my tote bag, there’s a massive dog on the bus, he can smell it😭😭😭 he keeps coming toward me. the owner keeps pulling him away. I’m deathly afraid of dogs. It’s a half an hour ride. Pray he doesn’t come for me, I spent a tener😭😭 This bitch.

Anyway, tomorrow is Revenge of the 5th too, and I can’t decide whether to re-read the novelisation or rewatch the movie. Or maybe both, idk.

-💐

that sounds fun! i really just plan on watching all the movies today, nothing too special