#i would not recommend putting on notifications for me
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impostorsshow · 9 months ago
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Hello, Welcome to my blog! Here's a rundown of my featured tags and the main content on this blog! This is a silly focused blog, so I only post/reblog content about controversies/politics every once in awhile, and only if I think it's super important. Feel free to send me an ask about my opinions, but don't expect a super in depth answer
#Art - I only tag my personal art with this, and as I'm an artist this is a pretty big chunk of my blog aside from reblogs
#[fandom here] ranch dip - this is my tag for posts that are only interesting if you like whatever topic it is, ex: #original ranch dip which is for any OC content and #obj ranch dip which is for object show stuff. I don't tag any of my #reposts [reblogs] with ranch dips!
#talk talks - anything that's my own posts - it used to be for whenever I'm ranting and it's a long post, but it's fucked up because I used to put it on reblogs so just dont go near the beginning of the account
#talk talks?? - for reblogs that are me talk talking it up in the tags but it's kind of fucked up because I used to put it on og posts but I can't be fucked to clean it up, see avove
#search for smos - this is cherubpuppets object au but I'm THE ONLY ONE THATS POSTED IN THE TAG SO I GUESS ITS MINE UNTIL SOMEONE ELSE MAKES FANART >:[
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[I think dni lists are stupid and just put a hit list on you but. I like user boxes. That's my persona don't steal it please thx]
I mostly post about whatever hyperfixation I have at the moment or whatever game I've been playing recently, which of writing right now is Ask Goldie Anything, though I've also been known to post Zelda content, with scattered posts of Hatsune Miku and I dont ever really post about it but i reblog alot of varied stuff from hyper specific stuff my mutuals post to random memes I laughed at. my asks are always open if you want to request for me to talk about something or draw considering i dont have a bank account to take commissions yet and I dont have very much motivation to draw on my own, here's a few of my favorite art pieces showing off my range of art skill
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By the way, I have alt tags with little rambles about the art on most posts, the exception being whenever I'm A. Too tired to add them or B. The image is already explained somewhere else in my post :] pretty pretty please check if there's an alt tag on posts, if the alt tag is two paragraphs then the second paragraph is always the ramble, and a few other artists do this as well
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the-marios · 3 months ago
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hello, I’m Remy’s mom, and welcome to “the Marios”. I’m curating this blog so my boy can see safe content of his favorite characters, and I can have a visual record of the things he likes and occasionally what he likes about them. some quick info in case you’re browsing here:
- this blog is under my control and at no point will Remy be interacting directly on tumblr
- because of this, anyone can follow and interact with this blog. if you want, you can tag @the-marios in any art or content you see that he might like (I will obviously be checking it out first)
- if you do tag this blog, I will usually put those posts in the queue rather than reblog them outright since it’s easier to show him content in batches
- any and all Let’s Play video recommendations would be so appreciated. his current fixation is modded playthroughs of Super Mario Odyssey, one being a Baby Mario model swap playthrough, and the other being a Banjo Kazooie (“Bear Mario”) model swap playthrough.
- Remy cannot read yet, most of what is reblogged here is about the visuals
- I will sometimes like a string of posts from the Mario tags and get his thoughts in the tags before reblogging, I’m sorry if this is bothersome on notifications
His current favorite game is Paper Mario and the Thousand Year Door, but he also likes to watch videos about Mario Party, Super Mario Maker 2, Super Mario Odyssey, and Super Mario Wonder.
His current favorite character is baby yoshi from TTYD, specifically the red baby yoshi. He also likes Madame Flurrie and Princess Daisy, but this changes often.
Remy’s other major fixation is roombas!
Thank you to all the talented artists and content creators out there who have shared anything that has helped me relate to Remy on his terms.
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amoeganism · 3 months ago
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REASONS WHY SAE ITOSHI THINKS YOU'RE A MURDERER
you're kinda fucked up but not a criminal! but don't worry, sae kinda likes it
happy late birthday sae itoshi ur a cunt i love u
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THE APARTMENT
The first time Sae meets you is at Aiku’s birthday party. He hadn’t intended on going, but it was either going to the function or have Oliver and the rest of the U-20 team get on his ass for being a no-show. Both options sucked, but Sae ultimately decided on wearing some plain, black button-up and one of the five identical black slacks he owns (they were bought at the same time, Sae doesn’t know why he did that but he had an urge and he had the money). When Aiku opened the door to apartment 408, the first thing Sae noticed was you, still dressed in creased and suspiciously stained pajamas, dragging a black garbage bag across the floor. He made the wrong decision, Sae concluded.
It was at the party where he got formally introduced and learned your name. He expected to forget it but that night, he found himself searching it on Google, making sure you weren’t a criminal just to sleep without worries. Before drifting off, he swore he saw a search recommendation as “...’s victims” but he’d rather not go to practice the next morning with the heebie jeebies.
THE DEPARTMENT STORE
A shelf of pots stood in front of Sae, each one lined perfectly with each other as a row of pans hung from above. Sae ran his fingers across the handle of a black stainless steel pan, feeling the cold metal glide across the rough calluses of his fingertips. Ever since he landed in Japan and moved out of his parents’ place, his diet was lacking and blasphemous for an athlete of his caliber. The culinary skills he had acquired in Spain were put to waste in his apartment that looked more like a rent listing.
“Oh, Itoshi? Good morning!” At the sound of his name, Sae shut his eyes and inwardly groaned. The last thing he needed to deal with was a fan approaching him in public but the recognition of an oddly familiar voice urged him to take a slight glance at whom it may be. In the corner of his eye, there stood you, holding the largest butcher’s knife he had ever seen in his eighteen years of living.
The blade was the size of your head, reflecting the beaming smile on your face, one too bright for your menacing stance. Your eyes glimmered underneath the department store’s white lights as you grabbed the handle of the weapon with both hands after rapidly waving. Sae’s heartbeat intensified and he placed the reason for the imminent threat before him—there could be no other definitely more rational reason.
Sae grumbled back a “good morning” before walking off with a sturdy saute pan. He could not answer if it was out of fear, to be polite, or maybe a secret (and evil) third option.
THE ATTEMPT
Hot steam had fogged the mirrors of Sae’s bathroom when he stepped out of the shower. As he dried his hair, the screen of his phone lit up with a new notification. Recently, the only phone alerts he had been getting were from his manager and occasionally his parents. It wasn’t that Sae Itoshi was a loser—he just hated almost everyone in his contacts. But when he opened his phone to an unknown number, his brows furrowed in confusion.
YOU: hi its y/n!!! oliver gave me ur number hope u dont mind ^_^
SAE: <thumbs up>
YOU: thumbs are my fav finger by far they look so chewy
SAE: Wtf
YOU: do u wanna get lunch together tmrw :D
SAE: Ok
SAE: Why tomorrow
YOU: I know what your entire schedule is.
YOU: Meet me at my apartment at 12:00 PM
YOU: Do not be late.
SAE: <thumbs up>
Sae looked out of his window and made sure all his doors were locked before going to bed (but he also stood in front of the full-body mirror in his room, holding different shirts and pants up to himself, wondering what you would like to see).
THE ATTACK
Apartment 408 smelled strongly of herbs and spices when you opened the door for Sae. The cologne he had put on that morning would be overpowered by your cooking and he’d drive home reeking of a hearty lunch rather than designer fragrance. On the kitchen island, a pot of stew rested on a large coaster as a rice cooker was set to “Keep Warm” on the counter. The strong aroma was delightful to his senses and the slight rumbling of his stomach led him to sit and quietly thank you for cooking.
“What do you want to drink? I got all kinds of tea and beer ‘cause Oliver is kinda an alcoholic,” you ask, holding the refrigerator door open waiting for him.
“Water is fine, thanks.”
You grab a pitcher and glass for him then move back to the dishwater for plates and utensils. Before sitting, you untie your light blue apron and fold it next to the kitchen sink. If Sae were any other person, he would almost miss the suspicious red stain in the inside of the pocket but considering the two of you were in an environment with several potential weapons in the vicinity, Sae decided keeping quiet was the smartest choice.
“I hope you like beef stew, Oliver says it’s the least potent thing I make and would have the best impression on you,” you confess. “Help yourself, I don’t think I put anything lethal in it.”
“Don’t think?” Sae questions with a raised eyebrow.
“Who knows with all the chemistry shit that happens, maybe I made mustard gas without knowing…”
“You invited me over, shouldn’t you care more about the guest’s safety?”
“Not really, it’s more exciting this way. Aren’t you feeling a thrill right now?”
“I’m only feeling concern for myself.”
“Isn’t that so fun?” you inquire with too much glee for the predicament. Sae thinks you’re 100% fucked up in the head and thinks he has around a 80% of making it out alive. “It’s like Russian Roulette!”
"Haven’t you considered that the average person doesn’t want to die from poisoning?”
“Who said you would die?”
“You?”
“Oh. Whoops. Still exciting though! Let’s see who wins!”
It didn’t take long for Sae to finish the last of his meal—it was unfortunately tasty. Sae wiped his mouth clean with a napkin you gave him and brought his dishes to the sink.
“Guess you didn’t kill me,” Sae nudges you with a smug grin. “You should try harder next time.”
“Wait—next time?”
“Yeah. Try again text week, I’ll text you my schedule.”
“Thank you so much for that, you don’t know how much I had to spend to get this week’s schedule from a stalker fan,” you confess in relief, blissfully unaware of Sae rapidly turning his head to stare at you.
“You what?”
“You’re literally the best; rent’s coming up so I really need that.”
Sae concludes you’re a danger to society but to keep himself and the public safe, he has to see you again. Sitting in his car, he quickly pulls out his phone and sends his manager a text to keep Tuesday of next week free—that’s when you have the most time (to spend with him). He puts the date in his calendar and this time, turns the notification on.
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charlotteking23 · 4 months ago
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Money, money, money - MV1/33
Max Verstapppen x reader
Summary: texting Max you spent 5k on various expensive brands.
Warnings: 'Money, money, money' by ABBA mentioned a lot, recommend playing the song while reading this.
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Shopping...
One of your favorite things to do besides cuddling with your babies Jimmy and Sassy.
So here you were roaming the expensive Monaco mall, with your cute white dress and a little bow in your hair making you seem so innocent at first glance.
Upon looking at the many stores none have caught your eye, as you walk aimlessly around the mall.
The sound of your YSL heels clicks around the white marble floor, seeing your favorite clothing store in sight.
As soon as you enter all the stress and worries melted away seeing the displays of clothes.
"Ok, don't go overboard again, be calm, and don't get too much," You said in your thoughts walking timidly around the store, trying to say the affirmations in your head as best as possible.
Upon saying those affirmations you saw your favorite brand and out those affirmations went, that you were trying so hard to follow.
You saw so many clothes you had yet to buy, putting them in your basket not slowing down.
"Excuse me, Ma'am", One of the store clerks said interrupting your from you shopping addiction rampage.
"Um, yes", you said slowly turning around to see the store clerk smiling at you with an empty basket in hand.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt but I noticed your basket full so I came to give you another one," She said rather kindly handing you the basket.
You looked down at your basket which was full to the brim, now in any other situation you would decline politely and make the hard decision of putting some of the clothes back in their belonging place.
"Thank you", You said taking the empty basket shooing away any worried thoughts out of your head, only thinking about shopping.
You waited in line to purchase all the clothes you wanted to buy before hearing the lady calling for the next customer.
You put your two full baskets of clothes on the table, watching as the lady was probably judging you for buying all these expensive items, but that didn't matter as the total came out to 5k.
5k as in 5 thousand dollars, you grab your wallet out taking out the first credit card you could see before inserting it in the machine and hearing the beep to take it out.
You waved goodbye to the lady, walking out with large shopping bags from various brands in your hand while looking at the receipt in disbelief.
You take out your wallet again to put the receipt inside so you don't lose it but something else catches your eye...Max credit card.
"Oh..No, omg don't tell me I paid for this 5 thousand dollar clothes with Max's credit card, damn it", You were astonished how the hell did you mistake your credit card with Max's credit card.
I mean you knew why, you were so surprised by the total, you weren't paying attention and must have picked up Max's credit card instead of yours.
You knew you had to come clean to Max as already the guilt was starting to way in on you.
You tried calling him but to no avail, so your next option was to text Max.
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Well that was not what you were expecting, but I mean Max is loaded with money.
'ding'
you opened your phone to see a notification from Venmo, OMG.
Max just sent you 10 thousand dollars through Venmo, what the fuck.
You quickly called Max anxiously, swaying back and forth frantically.
"Max!", you shouted out before seeing the looks you were receiving by onlookers before speaking more quietly but still frantically.
"yes, liefje what's wrong", Max said either oblivious to your shouting worries or teasing you.
"Maxie, why would you send me that much money", you whispered loudly before quickly leaving towards the exit of the mall.
"Why not liefje, you deserve it", Max charmingly said.
"I already spent a lot of your money, why more?", You said with guilt, riding in your conscience.
"Liefje, you can spend as much money as you want, I want to be able to afford whatever your heart desires", Max sweetly said, you don't know what happened but as soon as you heard that all your worries melted away.
"Thanks, Maxie I appreciate the gesture but I think I am done shopping for today", You quietly whispered ready to just go home.
"hmm, if you're sure. Do you want me to come pick you up", you heard Max say. Also hearing some faint noises in the background.
That only means one thing Max is sim racing right now, "It's okay, I brought the car anyway, I will see you home".
"Okay liefje, I love you", Max spoke through the phone.
"Love you too", you said before hanging up.
You walked towards your car opening the backseat door before putting all your shopping bags in.
You turned on the car, putting on your favorite singer ABBA.
"Hmm 'Money, money, money' or 'Dancing Queen'...well 'Money Money Money' seems to fit the situation better.
You began driving and singing all your worries away, dancing very crazy in the car with not a single care in the world.
'If I got me a wealthy man I wouldn't have to work at all'
'Money, money, money Must be funny In the rich man's world'
'So I must leave, I'll have to go To Las Vegas or Monaco'
You made it home to you and Max's shared apartment with your dignity slightly intact.
Your hair was all crazy and you were out of breath with your private dance party you had just seen yourself witness.
"Hello my babies", You smiled at your cats already purring on your leg right when you got through the door.
Oh how I wished cats could talk, you wished silently in your mind before setting all your shopping bags on the dining table.
You walked towards Max sim room hearing the faint screaming of him.
You open the door peeking your head out a little but leaving enough room for Jimmy and Sassy to come through to see their cat dad.
Max heard the door open, seeing you peaking behind the door, "Hi liefje", he said motioning you to come in.
"Hi Maxie", you say rather shyly hearing the other f1 drivers Max was gaming with.
"Hey guys, I'm gonna log off, see you tomorrow", Max said quickly before signing off not waiting for their replies.
Max stood from the chair before wrapping his arms around your waist, giving you a peck on your lips.
"How was shopping, Liefje", Max smiled teasingly.
You rolled your eyes at his snide remark before answering "It was fine, Maxie", you shrugged with a smile appearing on your lips.
"That's good, I hope you like my gift", Max replied walking out of the room with their cats in tow following wherever their mother goes.
"you know what song I was listening to on the way here", you said excitedly already humming the lyrics.
"Oh how could I ever guess what song you were listening to", Max said pretending to think before sitting on the couch in concentration.
"it was 'Money, money, money', by ABBA", you repeated in excitement sitting next to Max singing some of the lyrics.
"How could I guess that, it's not like you don't sing that song 24/7, I can even hear it in my dreams", Max said pretending to shudder as if he was scared.
"sounds like a nice dream to me", you said not missing the way Max rolled his eyes at your antics.
"Of course, Liefje", Max said turning on the TV hoping to stop you from singing the ABBA song but to no avail since you already started singing the lyrics as loud as possible, with the cats joining in your dancing.
I work all night, I work all day, to pay the bills I have to pay Ain't it sad? And still, there never seems to be a single penny left for me That's too bad
In my dreams, I have a plan If I got me a wealthy man I wouldn't have to work at all I'd fool around and have a ball
Money, money, money Must be funny In the rich man's world Money, money, money Always sunny In the rich man's world A-ha, ah All the things I could do If I had a little money It's a rich man's world
A man like that is hard to find, but I can't get him off my mind Ain't it sad? And if he happens to be free, I bet he wouldn't fancy me That's too bad
So I must leave, I'll have to go To Las Vegas or Monaco And win a fortune in a game My life will never be the same
Money, money, money Must be funny In the rich man's world Money, money, money Always sunny In the rich man's world A-ha, ah All the things I could do If I had a little money It's a rich man’s world
Money, money, money Must be funny In the rich man's world Money, money, money Always sunny In the rich man's world A-ha, ah All the things I could do If I had a little money It's a rich man's world
It's a rich man's world
Masterlist
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nanaminokanojo · 8 months ago
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ACCIDENTALLY IN LOVE | Sukuna X You | CHAPTER INDEX I /PROLOGUE (Part 1-68)
-meet cute? a cheesy musical number? forget it! love makes itself known to you through a minor car accident, a broken arm, and a treacherously charming temporary chauffeur
CHARACTERS: sukuna x you/reader | jjk characters (uraume, gojo, geto, shoko, nanami, choso, maki, nobara, mei-mei, etc.)
GENRE: full-length smau + prose | bad boy x good girl | college au | a lot of firsts | aged-up characters | strangers to lovers | smut | fluff | angst | ooc depictions - soft sukuna ftw
TW/CW: strong/mature language | adult content so mdni on some parts | mentions of alcohol and/or smoking | mentions of injury, promiscuity and bullying | pet names because they're cute with 2D men | toxic behavior | will add more if something arises
AKI’S NOTES: Reblogs and likes are very much appreciated, and I actively respond to comments as well as Asks. Also, if you’re interested, I will include you in the tag list. Just message me through whatever avenue you’re most comfortable with. Happy reading!
MASTERLIST
A/N: Yup. Intrigue and a video right off the bat.
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CHAPTERS: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15
16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30
31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45
46 | 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53 | 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 | 59 | 60
61 | 62 | 63 | 64 | 65 | 66 | 67 | 68 | CHAPTER INDEX II
ADDITIONAL NOTES: i will be using pics and other media which would fit situations and make the smau-ness of this piece a little more realistic and entertaining when i believe it’s appropriate/fitting to the plot (as i've done with my other smau). having said that, with regard to inclusivity, i just want to put it out there that they will not necessarily be aimed as the exact descriptions to fit a supposedly generic reader nor will they be representative of a specific race or color. it’s all for the simple fact of media availability, for funsies and the fact that i don’t exclusively write in consideration of those aspects when using reader-insert characters unless i specify it. thank you for understanding.
TAG LIST: CLOSED
PLEASE READ: If you wanna be included in the tag list, please make sure that your “Exclude __(tumblr username)__ from Tumblr search and recommendations” setting is OFF so I can actually tag you guys and you'll get notifs when I update. Thank you very much.
Here's a reference for the instructions from domainofmarie. Thank you very much, my friend. This is very helpful.
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A/N: I have another version of this story somewhere on the internet with different characters, and I thought, why not make it a Sukuna smau. So excited for this! This'll probably come out this weekend lol or the next if push comes to shove.
© ORIGINAL WORK BY nanaminokanojo. CHARACTERS ARE INSPIRED BY GEGE AKUTAMI’S “JUJUTSU KAISEN”. [20240514]
PHOTOS/IMAGES/GIF/FANART/ANY MEDIA CREDITS GO TO THE RESPECTIVE OWNERS.
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leesromanova · 12 days ago
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dust collected on my pinned up hair
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pairing: natasha x reader
warnings: angst, hurt reader, happy/hurt/guilty nat, idk they're both hurting, marrige, cursing, self-criticism, lots of feelings. (i’m sorry)
synopsis: you go on your usual coffee run and bump into your ex, who if it wasn’t for the mutual break up, would have been the one.
a/n: i love angst lol. blame my over active imagination and taylor swift. thank you all for continuing to support and read my works <3
to put y’all in the mood i recommend listening to ↴
The line seemed endless. Bodies upon, bodies of caffeine addicts waiting to be serviced.
The energy of a busy New York coffee shop at 8am was truly a sight to see for any newbie to the city—thank god, you were accustomed to the rude grogginess of the baristas and the lines to wait for your wanted—no, needed, yet still overpriced coffee.
You hear the door open again as a small bell atop of the frame is triggered by the entering customer. The chill breeze of the city winter rips through the space, making you shiver and wrap your coat around yourself a bit tighter. Cool air creeping through the fibers of the winter coat you were sporting made you need that coffee a bit more urgently.
“Next in line!” the line moved as you pulled out your phone and took a step forward. You scroll through your notifications, looking for anything you had missed in your previous peak, before feeling a tap on your shoulder. Your first reaction is to look up with a rather hostile look in your eyes at whoever intruded your non-social, pre-caffeine headspace.
“Natasha?” your eyebrows crinkle at the sight of the woman in front of you. Her smile genuine as she looks down at you.
“Hi, stranger” she says, the raspy voice bringing back memories of a not-so-forgotten time in your past. She moves her arm around you to pull you into a side hug, you accept it—a bit stiffly and pull away, taking in her appearance.
She looked professional yet still casual and comfortable, a combination that always suited her quite well—at least the version you had gotten to know in your past. Her red locks in a neat braid that swept across her head and onto her shoulder, a few framing strands left out on the sides. Her eyes were more worn on the sides—the start of crows feet present besides her lashes.
Her eyes were the same, still the same shade of captivating green.
“How are you? How have you been?” she asks, pulling you out of your thoughts. Her voice coming out a bit rougher than how you remembered. Maybe it was caused by the cold air or, maybe it was just the other way the few years had affected her.
You look down and pocket your phone, “I’ve been okay, just y���know…holding up,” you watch as the person ahead of you steps forward, prompting the both of you to move up and fill the gap. You shift to the side, and make room for the redhead to stand beside you. The scent of her perfume lingers in the air, stirring up memories of the past.
“How about you? What have you been up to, besides finding ways to cut-in-line at random coffee shops?” she lets out a huff of air as she turns to look at you “I was leaving when saw you…so I decided I should come and say hi," she looks at you with an amused expression.
you smile and hum in acceptance, letting her continue. She takes a breath before starting, "I've been okay—for the most part. Just trying to keep up with what life throws at me." She smiles and puts her hands in her pockets. You wonder if they were just as rough as how you remembered, or if they’d grown more calloused with time.
"Are you cold?" you ask, still looking at her now-concealed hands. She turns to look at you, you meet her eyes, and she lifts a brow "I've told you before how we Russians don't get cold," she says before continuing "that’s something you should've remembered." her voice carries as the last words enter your ears and without thinking you respond.
"I remember lots of things."
You feel the energy around you both change as the words leave your lips and you cringe as you watch her body visibly stiffen. Your brutally honest word choice must’ve reminded her of the reason why it had been so long since the two of you spoke.
∞ ∞ ∞ ∞
Sometime in the past 2 years
“Natasha… I just can’t do this anymore.” The words choke in your throat as you pace in front of her in the living room of your shared apartment. Every step you take feels like it’s pulling you further from everything you once wanted, but you can't stop yourself. You can barely breathe, the emotion inside you holding your lungs down. Your eyes move to look at Natasha, and everything inside you screams to hold on.
“I’ve always been here for you,” you continue, voice cracking. “Always. I kept waiting, hoping you’d open up to me, just like I did for you, bare an-and vulnerable.” Your voice cracks making you take a steadying breath before continuing, pointing a shaking finger toward her. “I put my heart on the line, expecting the same... but I never got it. And when you finally did open up... I was there. I loved you through the dark days, the lonely nights. I stayed, Natasha. I stayed through everything, and I'd do it all again in a heartbeat.” Your words spill out like a dam breaking, but the anger, the frustration, the heartbreak—none of it makes the pain go away.
You want to somehow make it work, to find the missing piece that would make her open up fully. You wanted this to work more than anything. But the hard truth is, you don’t know just how much more you can keep giving without receiving the same in return. You’ve poured so much of yourself into this relationship—your love, your patience, your vulnerability—but now it feels like you’re just…empty. Every night you lie awake, hoping that tomorrow will be the day she finally opens up to you the way you’ve been opening up to her, and every day feels like another unanswered question, an in-life purgatory you can’t escape.
Your fingernails find their way into the flesh of your palms, the sharpness grounding you, but it doesn’t help.
Her heart tears in two as she watches you like this, feeling like a failure. She feels it deep inside—your hurt, your exhaustion, the years of unspoken emotions—and she knows, with crushing certainty, that no matter how much she loves you, she can’t undo the damage. You’re the one person who has always been there, who’s loved her unconditionally, who’s been so patient, so willing to fight for the relationship. She’s failed you. It wasn’t enough. Nothing she did was enough. She loved you—God, she loved you so much—but somehow, she couldn’t bring herself to give you the one thing you needed most: her whole heart. Every single time you reached out, she recoiled, afraid that if she gave you more of herself, she’d lose herself in the process. She knew loving you would mean taking the risk of loosing herself within the beauty that was to love just as hard as you did. 
She doesn’t know how to love you the way you need.
She lifts her head, eyes red, blurry with unshed tears, and glances at your hands, fingers still digging into your skin like you're trying to hold yourself together, as the nails cut through the layers of flesh on your palms. The pieces of yourself feeling like they're falling through your fingers like water. She hurts seeing you like this, she knew you did it to feel control in moments where you felt that control slip away—she’d had been trying to help you stop it, to show you that hurting yourself wouldn't heal anything, but now, she feels just as lost. She feels herself drowning in guilt. 
She’s the one who’s made you feel like this, hasn’t she? 
A warm, trembling hand wraps around your wrist, pulling you out of the darkness of your thoughts along with herself–trying to claw her way out of her guilt. Her touch is gentle, almost too gentle, as if she’s afraid you’ll break if she holds on too tight. She guides your fingers away from your skin, but the ache in your chest only deepens. She’s trying to fix you–to help you, not acknowledging that she needed it as well. And neither of you knew how to do it.
What’s the hell is wrong with me? 
The question cuts deeper than anything she’s ever felt. 
Why can’t I just give her what she needs? 
I love her. 
I love her so much. 
Why isn’t that enough?
“I feel horrible,” she whispers, her voice thick with tears. When you meet her eyes, they’re filled with more pain than you’ve ever seen in them. It tears through you. You wanted to help her, to make her feel loved and safe, but all you've done is hurt her. You've made her feel like she's failing, like she’s not enough, and the guilt is suffocating. She wants to tell you how much she loves you, wants to apologize, to make it better, but she knows deep down that no amount of apologies can fix the damage done. 
You swallow, but your throat is tight, your chest heavier than it’s ever been. "You’re right. You always did the right things. You said the right words. You showed me you loved me, but… I couldn’t see it. I didn’t feel it the way I needed to, and I hate myself for that. I hate that I couldn't be enough for you, Natasha." Your voice breaks at the end, a sound that rips through you, as if you're breaking apart inside. Not enough for her to give you her all. “I’m so sorry. So sorry for making you feel like you weren’t enough.” Making her feel like she hadn’t been giving you enough because she couldn’t give you want you wanted—craved. The sudden realization makes you heave as you reel about you both hurting each other unwillingly—how could something so good turn into something so hurtful?
The weight of your own apology hangs in the air, suffocating, because you don't know how to fix this anymore. You don’t know how to make her stop feeling like she’s a failure when all she’s ever done is try. 
Her heart shatters as you speak. She sees the pure hurt in your eyes, feels the way you’re pulling away from her. it crushes her to know she's the one that hurt you, the one that made you feel as if you weren't enough. Every word you say is a reminder that she’s failed. She’s tried so hard to be the person you need, to show you how much she loves you, but every time she’s gotten close to letting herself go the crippling fear of falling too deep holding her back. 
“I wish I could change,” she says, voice barely audible, but you hear the depth of her regret in every word. She places her hand over her heart, almost as if trying to stop the pulsating ache there. “I don’t want you to suffer with my shit anymore. I don’t want to drag you through this anymore… but I don’t know how to fix me.” She looks at you, her tears falling freely now. “I hate that I can't give you everything you need. I hate that I couldn't be the person you deserved."
You feel every ounce of her guilt like a physical blow, and it’s suffocating. You wish there was something you could say to make her feel better, but the truth is, you're not sure if you even deserve to make her feel better right now. You've failed her too, in so many ways.
Maybe I’m not enough for her. Maybe I never was. 
The thought stings, like a shock against your skin. You can’t help but feel that maybe you’ve failed, that you’re the real reason things fell apart, not Natasha. But as you look at the redhead, her guilt hanging heavy in the air, you realize there’s not just one person to blame, there’s not only one person responsible for this. You’ve both been afraid. Afraid of fully trusting, of letting the walls down completely, of letting each other in.
And now? Now, it feels like it’s too late.
“I don’t want to hurt you anymore,” she says, her voice cracking. “You deserve so much better than me. You deserve someone who can love you with everything they have, without holding back... and I’m not her. I can't be that person." Her eyes search yours, desperate for some sign, some glimmer of hope, but all she finds is a reflection of her own pain.
Staring at her tear-streaked face, the realization hits you like a punch to the gut: it’s not going to happen. It’s not because you haven’t tried, and it’s not because she doesn’t love you—she does, so much, and you can see it in her eyes. But love isn’t enough. 
I can’t keep waiting for something that’s never going to come. 
I can’t keep hurting like this. 
You’re shaking now, but it’s not from anger. It’s from the unbearable truth that lingers in the space between you. The love you had, the connection you both tried so hard  to hold onto, is slipping away, and there's nothing you can do to stop it.
“I think…” you can barely get the words out, but they’re there, hanging in the air like the inevitable. "I think you’re right." Your voice cracks, your heart shattering with the weight of those words. You’ve known for so long, deep down, that this was coming. The back and forth, the exhaustion, the constant battle to make her open up, to make her let you in—it was destroying both of you, and it would never change. The months of fighting—wanting her to open up, to show you the real her, nothing was working as it should be. You had been fighting against something inevitable.
You run your thumb over her knuckles, trying to find comfort in the familiar motion, but it feels hollow now. “We’ve tried, Natalia,” you whisper, your heart breaking with every syllable. “We’ve tried to make this work, but I can’t keep pretending it’s going to be okay. I don’t want to hurt you anymore. I don’t want you to hurt for me anymore.”
Her tears fall harder now, as if the weight of your decision has broken something inside of her. You both sit there, silently, broken and exhausted from a love that was never enough. Neither of you knows how to fix what’s been destroyed. As she looks at you, so broken, so utterly lost, she feels like she’s watching her own heart crack in two.
You both sit in silence as the sounds of the city bleed into the apartment and circle the two of you.
∞ ∞ ∞ ∞
“Next!” the barista’s tired voice carries through the space of the café, and makes you both turn to reach the counter. Your cheeks warm and tinged a shade of red at your earlier admission.
“Uh, can I get an iced blond vanilla late, with an extra pump of vanilla, and sweet foam with Carmel drizzle on top?” you order and look over at the redhead who was diligently staring at the side of your face.
She wondered how you hadn’t changed. Time seemed to have left you untouched. While she felt it’s weight etched into her face and mind—you were still the same. With the same coffee order, at the same coffee shop, the same you.
“W-would you like anything?” you ask, stuttering at the gaze she held.
“I’m okay,” she turns to the barista, “That’ll be all.” she completes your order out of habit as you pull out your card to pay.
the barista asks for your name and you both utter a thanks to the young woman, who doesn’t return the pleasantry as you both walk off to the side. The silence, between you both not unwanted, but definitely heightening your anxiety at the unexpected meeting.
You were not dressed to be seeing your ex at a coffee shop.
“Would you like to sit?” you clear your throat and ask, finding a table with two chairs. She smiles and looks at her watch. “Yeah—yeah, I got enough time” she says, sitting down beside you and looking out at the busy streets of the city that never sleeps.
She loved it here, her time in other continents and cities made her realize just how at home the city lights and sirens made her feel, just how at home the people in her life made her feel.
The light of the rising sun reflects off of the glass windows of tall buildings and illuminate her face. Her nose had stayed the same, the feature being something you loved about her even if she said she hated it from time to time. She turns and catches you staring. You to look away and clear your throat as she smiles warmly. She always liked that about you, so attentive to everyone around you.
Stop staring. You mentally kicked yourself for being caught.
“Y’know…you still order your coffee as if you hate the taste of it.” she teases, her hands motioning to the receipt that outlined the specific order you gave. A smile grows as you turn to look at her and laugh softly at her face of accusation. “I swear, you get the sugariest thing on the menu.” she continues, making you laugh a little louder.
Your laugh was the same–she noticed, your smile the same, but your eyes now held a few winkles at the sides as the joy spread over your face. She smiles at you then and leans back in the uncushioned, tall stool.
You roll your eyes and remove your gloves, “hey, before you tease just know you traumatized me with your coffee order,” she looks at you questioningly, making you lean in “Nat, you order a black coffee with like two sugars and call that a coffee order.” she laughs, her cheeks tinting a wonderful shade of red as she answers “It’s a legitimate coffee order y/n, that’s why they make me pay and why I made you try it.” her voice raspy as ever as it leaves her lips. “Oh yeah, trust me I know. I can still feel it on my taste buds and recoil every time I think about it.” she looks at your now very serious expression with a raised brow, and you both break into a shared cackle.
As the laughter settles, you both look at each other. Familiarity and warmth returning to your veins, you missed her. Sure, it had been more than enough time for you to get over her, but you never truly did. Everyone told you it was time to move on, but you never did, hoping, praying, manifesting that maybe one day you could fix things and reunite with the love of your life.
You went out with people, met other singles, dated—but no one made you feel what she did.
"So, how’s work?" you ask, your fingers nervously fiddling with the paper wrapping of a straw that was left on the table by some other customer. She glances down at your hands, noticing how your nails are no longer bitten or ragged, your palms free of the crescent-shaped marks that used to linger there. She smiles softly, noticing how you'd managed to break those anxious habits.
"It’s been good," she replies, her voice warm. "We got some new teammates in—I'm sure you saw it on the news." She looks into your eyes, smiling as she sees the familiar focus in your gaze. That hadn't changed either.
You nod and smile back, leaning in as she continues. "One of them is named Wanda. She's brilliant—you'd love her. Amazing sense of humor, and the best style. I know you’ve always been into fashion."
You chuckle softly, the memory of how you used to carefully pick out your outfits coming back. "That’s nice. So, you and her are close?" you ask, your voice lighter than you feel. It's easy to fall back into the rhythm with her. Conversations with her never felt draining, never like you were just filling silence. At least, it didn’t, not before everything went wrong.
"Yeah," she says, smiling shyly, but her eyes drop to her hands. And that's when you see it. The ring.
The world seems to blur for a moment as your eyes lock onto the silver band adorning her finger. Simple, yet undeniably there. Your mind races, struggling to catch up, focusing on the details—an engraving, some flowers, maybe lilies? You remember how she always loved those.
The sound of her voice cuts through your thoughts. "Y/N?"
You snap back to reality, but it feels like your heart is still racing. You blink, meeting her gaze. The concern in her eyes is unmistakable, but it's not for you. She's moved on.
“Order for y/n!” the barista yells, and you turn, smiling tightly at Nat before getting up to retrieve your coffee.
God, how had you not seen it before? Was it always there? How long ago did she become so open? So willing to let someone in, that she’d actually gotten married?
The questions hit you like a wave, crashing over your mind with unbeatable force.
You make yourself look away, desperate to regain control of your thoughts. You tuck some hair behind your ear, trying to ground yourself, and take a long sip of your cold drink, the ice crunching between your teeth. It does nothing to ease the nausea building in your stomach.
“I—uh, I was looking at your wedding band,” you mutter, feeling the words slip out awkwardly. Your gaze drifts back to her fingers, the ring glinting in the sunlight. She follows your stare, quietly adjusting her hand, almost as if she’s waiting for this moment to land.
“Oh, um… yeah," she clears her throat, her voice sounding a little tighter than before. "Me and Wanda... we, uh... I proposed a few months ago,” she adds, looking down at the ring, tracing the engravings with her fingers. Finally, she meets your eyes, and for a brief second, it feels like everything you thought you knew about her is slipping away. This wasn’t the Natasha who used to laugh at your bad jokes, or the one who whispered your name in the quiet of your shared apartment, the one who whispered sweet nothings in your ear as you laid naked in bed after you’d had sex. No, this was a version of her you did not know.
“Oh.” The word barely leaves your mouth as you nod slowly, but it’s enough to echo in the silence between you two. It’s all you can manage, the word feeling too small, insignificant.
What else could you say?
You want to bury your face in your hands.
God, Y/N, think of something better. Say something better.
The words feel hollow, useless, as they form in your mind. The words don’t feel like your own. They feel forced, clumsy, like you’re trying to hold onto something that’s already slipping through your fingers. You hate how it feels. You hate how she feels like a stranger to you now, someone you don’t know anymore, someone who has moved on without you.
"Congratulations," you finally say, the words coming out flat, lifeless. Your smile feels too tight, too forced. You can feel it pulling at the corners of your lips as your body instinctively turns inward, the discomfort sharp and heavy.
Congratulations? Are you fucking serious?
She notices, of course—how could she not? Her eyes flicker with concern, watching as your posture shifts, your guard rising. But it’s too late. You’re already pulling away.
What the hell did I just say?
The self-criticism is almost suffocating.
Congratulations?
You want to slap your forehead, but you settle for simply glancing up at her. Her gaze is locked onto you now, intense and unwavering. It’s like she’s trying to reach you through the growing distance between you two, but you can’t shake the feeling that you’ve lost her... that you never really had her.
The sound of the coffee shop fade as your own internal dialogue takes over, mocking you.
You’re pathetic, it whispers.
You haven’t moved on.
You never really let go.
You glance around the coffee shop. There’s a woman in the corner smiling at her boyfriend—no husband, the wedding ring sparkling as she holds his cheek, a group of tourists chatting loudly about going to watch some play on Broadway, someone in the backline swiping through their phone, you can see the TikTok home screen from your place in the corner of the café.
But you can’t hear them. All you hear is the hollow beat of your own heart, pounding painfully in your chest, as if it knows that this moment is the end of something—something you still thought was possible.
It feels like you’re drowning, surrounded by noise, by life moving forward, while you’re stuck here in this tiny moment, unable to breathe.
Her eyes flicker with concern, noticing how your posture shifts, how you stiffen at the words that should have felt normal, casual. But they don’t. They can’t.
There’s nothing casual about this.
Nothing normal.
Not when your heart is bleeding under the weight of a past you can’t shake, a future you never thought you’d face.
You try to steady yourself, but you can feel the walls you’ve built around your emotions crumbling.
She’s married, Y/N. She’s married. Get over it.
But you can’t.
You feel a pang of guilt. Natasha’s gaze is warm, but there’s an ache in her eyes too—something that makes your heart hurt in a different way. She’s trying. She’s not the woman you left behind. But then again, neither are you. Neither is she.
Her hand rests, trembling, on the table now. She wants to reach out to you, but she’s scared of pushing too hard. You can see it in her eyes—she’s uncertain. She’s terrified of what you might say. Terrified of making it worse. Her fingertips brush against the edge of the table, hesitant, before pulling away. She’s probably wondering if she’s done the right thing. Wondering if she was wrong to move on, to make this decision without you, without this—whatever you two were. She watches you, her gaze softening as if she wants to comfort you, but she doesn’t know how. She doesn’t even know where to begin. She could try to reach for you, but she knows it might make things worse.
"Are you okay?" Natasha asks softly, her voice trembling slightly. She’s staring at you now, as if trying to understand what’s happening inside your head, but you don’t have an answer for her. You don’t even have an answer for yourself.
The silence stretches between you two, heavy with unspoken words, as the noise of the coffee shop crashes around you both, a stark reminder that the world keeps moving. And in it, Natasha is moving forward, and you... you’re left behind.
She regrets it. She regrets this—this distance. This moment. She wants to take it all back. To fix this. To fix you. But she can’t.
The weight of the regret hits her, and she breathes out a slow, steadying breath, her hand trembling on the table. She can feel it too, the unbearable tension between you both, the space that feels like a chasm even though you’re only inches apart.
But you—you’re the one who’s drowning, trying to keep your head above the weight of the memory and the feeling that you were never enough.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers, almost too quietly to hear. “I never wanted to hurt you. I never wanted you to feel like this.” Her voice cracks, and she looks away for a second, almost as if she can’t stand seeing you like this, can’t bear the thought of how much she’s hurt you.
But the truth is, she’s already lost you.
And she’s the one who will never be able to move on.
Her words cut deeper than she knows, because you can’t help but wonder—does she really not know? Has she been so caught up in her own life that she hasn’t seen how much this is tearing you apart? Or is it just that she’s moved on, and this is all just… a part of the past to her?
The thought makes your chest tighten. Your breath feels shallow, and you find yourself squeezing your cold drink harder, trying to steady the storm inside. You swallow, but it feels like there’s a lump lodged in your throat, blocking any response. You want to scream, to tell her everything, to make her understand how much it hurts to see her here, happy, with someone else. But the words are gone—lost in the space between your need to cry and the reality of the life she’s chosen without you.
“Why?” The word slips out before you can stop it, raw and desperate and hurt. You didn’t mean to ask it—didn’t want to ask it—but you can’t help it. You need to know.
Natasha’s heart aches at the sound of your voice, the fragility in it. For a moment, she feels as though the floor beneath her might give way. She had hoped—hoped—that you would be okay. That this wouldn’t hurt so much. But the pain is evident, like a raw wound, and it’s impossible to ignore.
Her face crumbles for a moment, and she looks away, as if she’s searching for the right words, for something that might make this hurt less. But there are no words that can make this better. No words that can undo the last few years.
she feels a lump in her throat, the wounds she'd covered, gashes shed mended, all coming undone in this moment.
“I don’t know,” Natasha whispers. “I really don’t know. I thought I could give you what you needed, but… I couldn’t. And I’m sorry, Y/N. I’m sorry I couldn’t be what you needed me to be.”
Her voice cracks as she says it, and she feels herself breaking inside. She knows you’re hurting, but she’s not sure what she can do to make this right. She had tried—tried so hard—to be what you needed, but she failed. And it kills her that she couldn’t give you the love and stability you deserved. The love she thought she could offer, the love that now feels so distant and ungraspable.
Your heart aches. It’s a contradiction, isn’t it? The way she sounds so guilty, and yet you know deep down that she’s not really sorry for her life—she’s sorry for the fact that she hurt you in the process of living it.
Her words feel hollow to her, and as they leave her lips, she wonders if she’s just prolonging the pain for both of you. She swallows hard, her fingers fidgeting with the edge of her ring again. It’s such a small, insignificant gesture, but in this moment, it feels like the biggest thing in the world. It feels like a symbol of everything she’s lost. A symbol of a promise she made to someone else, a promise she can’t go back on.
She wants to reach for you again, but she knows better now. She knows that you’ve already made up your mind—that you’ve already closed the door on what could have been. The door that used to swing open so easily for her, but now only feels heavy and locked.
You look at her, your gaze raw, and for a second, you think you might say something else. You might beg her to take it all back. To come back. But you know you can’t. You know you have to let this go. You feel a deep ache in your chest as you realize that this is the end. The finality of it settles in, and you can’t hold on any longer.
Instead, you take a shaky breath and pull back from the table, your hands folding into your lap as you gather yourself. It’s almost like you’re physically trying to close yourself off, to shield the part of you that still hopes and longs for something that no longer exists.
“Maybe... maybe you were never what I needed either,” you mutter quietly, more to yourself than to her. The words taste bitter on your tongue, and you wish you could take them back as soon as they leave. But it’s true. Somewhere along the way, you lost her. And maybe, just maybe, you lost yourself in the process.
The words hit Natasha like a slap, but it’s the truth. She’s never been able to give you what you needed, and that realization settles like stone in her stomach. She opens her mouth as if she’s going to say something—something to fix it, to undo the damage—but the words die in her throat. They would only make things worse, only deepen the wound between you both.
She doesn’t speak. She can’t. She just watches you, helpless, as you turn away from her, the finality of your departure cutting into her chest like a knife.
You shake your head, unable to meet her gaze. The tears you’ve been holding back for so long feel close now, threatening to spill over. You can’t let them. You won’t. Not here, not in front of her, not when everything feels like it’s already slipping through your fingers.
“I should go,” you say, your voice quieter than you intended. It’s not a demand, it’s not even a decision—it’s just the only thing you can bring yourself to say. You push your chair back, standing up slowly, feeling like your legs might give out beneath you. You feel empty, but in a way, that emptiness is almost worse than the pain.
Her eyes follow you, and Natasha doesn’t try to stop you. She doesn’t ask you to stay. Her hands are folded in her lap, and she’s left with the sense that, somehow, she’s failed you, failed the both of you. She doesn’t think she could stand to watch you walk away again. The understanding in her eyes is quiet, gentle. She knows this is the end.
As you turn to walk away, you hear her raspy voice one last time. “Y/N… I still care about you.”
You stop for a moment, the weight of her words pressing down on you. You want to say something back—anything—but you know it wouldn’t change things. It wouldn’t fix anything.
You don’t respond. Instead, you walk. One foot in front of the other as you push open the door of the coffee shop, the cold New York air hitting your face like a slap. It’s sharp, biting, but somehow, it’s exactly what you need. You step into the busy street, the noise and the rush of people washing over you, but all you can hear is the silence of her absence. Is this it? You think. It has to be.
You keep walking, trying to put one foot in front of the other, but every step feels heavier than the last. You don’t know how you’re supposed to move forward—to move past her. You don’t know if you ever will.
After all, it’s never over.
∞ ∞ ∞ ∞
a/n: YAYY!! i was so excited to start writing this fic, it’s my drafts since October so i’m happy it’s finally out. i hope you all liked it! it was my first time writing angst and i’m very proud of it, if you guys have any constructive criticism pls give it politely:)
ps: i’m excited to see everyone’s reactions to it, please do share how you feel afterwards <3
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cafehyunji · 9 months ago
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Video Phone | Abby Anderson
you sayin that you want me? So press record, I'll let you film me. On your video phone
content : smut, fingering, moaning, minor cussing, modern!abby
I recommend Minors do not interact !!
Knowing Abby, she would take late shifts at the fire department, being in the status of the hard working (and hot) fire fighter, leaving you home alone with your rampant thoughts of her and her “actions”, and today was one of those days. Rather than the usual fingering alone to just the thought of her while laying on her side of the bed you both lay in, listening to a playlist you made for times alone, you take another route. Recording it and sending it to her.
Abby gets a notification as she finishes up the last 30 of her shift, she swipes up pressing the notification with the contact name “Angel 🤍” with an attachment. She’s greeted with the view of you in a pair of lingerie she couldn’t recognize, quickly reaching in her pockets she ruffles around to find her headphones, pulling out the once white case now turned yellow from her hectic days of playing ‘the garden wife” in your backyard on her off days.
Taking out the small pieces inside and placed them in her ear. She looks around a bit not knowing if this could be the regular ask of how your outfit looks or something else, once she feels the coast is clear she starts the video. The phone is set up close enough, giving her a great view of your glistening folds in the dim room, lit by the thin cheap fairy lights you bought on a whim months ago. She cringed seeing them in your hands after telling you they were a fire risk days before they came, but she couldn’t disappoint her beautiful girl… could she?
Soft moans flowed through the small white pieces of plastic, making her feel as if she was in the room sitting and watching as you touched yourself for her. She loved how the dim small warm tinted lights hit your brown slick folds, listening to the sweet gush of her pretty pussy taking in your two digits with ease. From behind the screen, dear lord was she drooling and parched (and nearly having a waterfall between her thighs.) “I wish you were here…” you softly pant, speeding up your thrust. “I don’t feel right without you… but I’m so impatient.. fuck..” You huff, panting and throwing your head back in pleasure.
You softly whine, lifting your head to look at the phone watching yourself as you touch yourself thinking of Abby sitting, and watching at the edge of the bed telling you what to do. A few more pumps of your digits bring you a harsh feeling of relief, causing you to gush all over the newly washed fitted sheets you put on hours ago. you toss your head back onto the pillows, letting the video end on its own before getting up and sending the good parts to Abby.
©cafehyunji 2023
A/n: Long time no see... It's been a long ass time since I've posted something on here that wasn't a repost.. at least Im not treating y'all like my editing account... (I haven't posted there in like 6-7 months.. I'm treating it like the plague..)
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fatliterature · 27 days ago
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The Streamer
Something was happening to Carlos. 
Before it began, he was an early 20s hoodie-wearing streamer boy. See his tub of protein powder on the shelf behind him, his laundry basket in the corner, his gym bottle reflecting the blue LED lights of his room. He had all the gear, the lights, the mic, a good brb animation, his subscriber count wasn’t crazy but he was happy with his progress. What is uppp guys uhhhhhh I’m gonna stream some Fortnite tonight guys… but I also wanna watch some stupid videos on YouTube maybe? See his face framed by his hood. He’s cute, he has big dark eyes and thick eyebrows, lots of potential. This is the night he makes a mistake. Okay okay okay lemme get up my YouTube okay I have uhhhh. He shares his screen with the viewers. There is a kind of guilty pleasure in seeing a streamer’s screen shared for a few seconds, a weird wallpaper, a messy desktop, how many notifications? He opens the browser and brings up YouTube. It’s the usual recommended videos, they look like yours, games, video essays, meme compilations. But what’s that? The bottom right hand corner. There is a recommended video. It’s on his ‘watch again’ list. The screen changes but it’s too late. The chat starts to react. Uhhhhh what are you all talking about? There’s a long pause. Belly play video. Belly play video. Bro…. Belly play video? WTF LMAOOOOOOOOO. Bro is watching belly play videos whatttt. OMG. No. No, no, no, no. Chill. Someone uhhhh somebody sent that to me as a joke chat literally chill. It’s fine. They’ll move on. They’ll forget it. Jesus why would the algorithm do him dirty like this. Last time he ever shares his screen on his YouTube homepage. Plus, it was TRUE, somebody had sent him it as a joke, and he had loved it, he’d laughed and watched it again, and again, and again. Each time laughing less, each time getting a little quieter, totally perplexed, and… curious. OKAY guys, we’re gonna go to Fortnite. He thinks the moment is forgotten. But someone watching him won’t forget. 
It’s a few months later. And chat is driving him crazy. He had started eating on stream, just snacks and whatever. But someone in the chat was making it into a thing. 600 calories! The first time they did it he barely noticed. But the next time he ate… 450 calories! Was that the same person in the chat? 1800 calories!!! OMG yesss! Okay, so every time he ate something, they were gonna comment the amount of calories it had, kind of a weird joke. Also, what the fuck, this meal has 1800 calories? He finished his soda. 400 more calories! Keep it up king! Fuck. Something about this was making his brain feel funny. Chat why is everyone calorie counting me? Let me live! He looked away from his game for a second and read the chat. We love it king. You should eat more. Everyone spam 5000 CALORIE GOAL in the chat right NOW. 5000 calorie goal!! 5000 calorie goal king Carlos!! You can do it! BANG! He looked back at his game. Game over. You placed #80th. Fuck! How long had he been staring at those words? Alright guys, clearly I suck at this game tonight. His heart beat a little faster. You wanna see me reach 5000 calories by the end of the stream? Get me to 5000 subscribers! Then maybe I’ll think about it you fucking weirdos. 
It’s a few months later again. This is where it’s safe to say, something was happening to Carlos. He tried not to think about it too much. His audience of subscribers had grown, a lot. And they seemed to be in on the joke. It was a joke by the way, the calorie counter at the top of the screen, which had made the chat go WILD when he first put it up to make them laugh. Carlos found that the more he leaned into the joke, the more his subscribers grew. The more he did what they wanted, the more they came back for more. The more he ate, the bigger he got. And he had definitely gotten bigger. I mean chat, look at me, you’ve made me blow up it’s not even funny, I don’t move off this chair and you want me to RAISE the daily calorie goal are you insane? He jiggled a little when he laughed. His brain felt funny a lot of the time now, it made him feel kind of foggy, to play along with this. But what was he doing? He had actually gained weight… and he had yes, gained a lot of subscribers too. And they loved it, they loved it more than the games he was streaming. His breathing got a little faster. What if my subscriber count just kept getting bigger? What if I kept it up? Could this be like, my gimmick? I just let my chat decide how big…. His breathing got a lot faster. Up until this point, he had denied the semi erection that happened every time he started thinking like this. He tried not to think about it too much. But he wanted those subscribers, he wanted his platform to grow… he wanted…to grow. What? Chat I think you guys are messing with my head. A long pause. We just want you to be who you truly are - Calorie Carlos! Omg yes. Calorie Carlos… our fat streamer boy. Carlos felt dizzy. Calorie Carlos! Our growing streamer pig lmaoooo. Okay, his erection wasn’t going away. What the fuck was happening. He tried not to think about it, as he reached for the keyboard. He tried not to think about it, as he raised the daily calorie counter to 6000 a day, he tried not to think about it, as he lifted his hoodie, jiggled his belly for the camera, and changed his name to Calorie_Carlos. 
It’s a year later. The games Carlos plays are almost irrelevant. The calorie counter glows in the corner of the screen, it makes sounds and animates as it tracks his every meal, and every time it updates the chat goes wild. The more he gave in, the more he shared his growing belly and showed himself eating, the more every stream filled with responses. Encouragement. Looking good Calorie Carlos! Looking BIG. Keep growing! This changed the landscape of his chat. It…. turned him on, it KEPT him turned on. And eventually it began to change the landscape of his brain. Good streamer. Good piggy. Never stop. He couldn’t get away from it. The hazy brain fog that happened when he read these things, it became how he spent most of his days. Show your belly in the next 1000 calories king. Good fat boy! Eat more for us. What effect did this have on Carlos? He stopped worrying about why this turned him on, the validation he received from so many subscribers meant his mind was filled with encouragement and gluttony, it struggled to find space for anything else. His personality began to change. See his tubs of ice cream on the desks around him, his neglected gym gear pushed into the corner and hidden under empty pizza boxes, his 2 litre bottles of soda reflecting the pink LED lights of his room. He is Calorie Carlos. What is upppp guys uhhhh URPP tonight I’m getting a HUGE fast food order and I’m gonna rate it all as I eat it, I know you all wanna see this massive belly when it’s full ha! Well, you’ll just have to keep watching.
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ladykailitha · 2 months ago
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The Au Pair Boy Part 3
I'm living for the love for this story!! Thank you everyone!
I'm sorry to say that any requests to be added to the tag list will be ignored. It's all full up! But! You can follow me and put on notifications. That seems to work for most people!
In this we have a lot of growing pains and the girls try everything they can think of to keep Eddie home.
Part 1 Part 2
~
The next couple of days were spent ironing out of the kinks and setting expectations. Like when Steve scolded Janice for pulling on Joan’s braids and she yelled back that she wasn’t the boss of her.
Both girls went running to their dad.
Eddie looked down at his two little sun spots. “I don’t know why you’re coming to me about this, if Steve saw Jannie pulling Joanie’s hair, then he had every right to call it out. Just like Chrissy, just your uncles. He is in charge while I’m gone, so you better get used to his authority. Both of you girls go sit on your time out chairs for five minutes.”
Both girls gasped in shock, but after an intense showdown, they did as they were told.
“Thanks for that,” Steve said with a huff. “There’s always a little bit of give and take for first couple of weeks, and you laying down the law will really help that.”
Eddie smiled up at him. “It’s just been a tough year for them both. They’re old enough to remember Ethan, but young enough that it’s all the good and none of the bad. So they don’t understand why he left. I’ve been talking to a couple of therapists that think once they’re a little older, they want to start seeing both girls.”
“Nothing quite as traumatic as abandonment issues from an early age,” Steve said with a nod.
Eddie huffed out a laugh. “Sounds like you’re talking from experience.”
Steve sat down on the sofa with a sigh. “Unfortunately, yes. Only my parents did just enough to make sure I wasn’t taken away from them. Making sure their trips would only last long enough that it would be considered child abandonment and endangerment. Sending me gifts for my birthday and Christmas, but not being there.” He ran his fingers through his hair.
“Then as I got into high school, sending me money for groceries and gas. As well as a hefty allowance to make sure that I wouldn’t talk. ‘Let’ me throw lavish parties and then ground me when they found out. Only they would pack up and leave, knowing I’d ignore the grounding because they were gone. Just a bunch of stupid shit like that.”
Eddie’s expression softened. “In the Hall of Fame of shitty parents, that’s really up there, man.”
Steve let out a huff of bitter laughter. “I got the last laugh though. The second I turned eighteen and finished school, I told them I was running away with my best friend and joining the circus. Then I told them I was bisexual and never looked back.”
“So how was the circus?” Eddie asked with a grin.
“Not as fun as you’d expect,” Steve conceded. “Robin and I didn’t have anything like skills to be a performer, and wasn’t experienced in running the booths and rides, so we were part of the put up and take down crew.”
“So how did the nanny thing come about?” Eddie asked, crossing his legs and leaning his elbow on the arm of the chair.
“I used to babysit these kids when I was younger,” Steve said, putting his elbows on his knees and clasping his hands together, “and when the one’s dad died and left a hefty life insurance to his mom. She suddenly was overwhelmed and hired me to nanny for her.”
Eddie thought back to the resumé the agency had sent over. “Mrs. Henderson, right?”
“That’s the one,” Steve leaned back on the sofa. “Dustin was a good kid. Too smart and arrogant for his own good.”
“Then of course, Mrs. Henderson recommended me to her friends,” Steve said. “One of them said they would only hire me through an agency. My ex-girlfriend happened to work at a nanny agency while she was going to school and offered to put in a good word for me.”
Eddie raised his eyebrows. “That was nice of an ex. I don’t know if I have any exes that would do the same for me.”
Steve just shrugged. “We didn’t exactly part on the best of terms either, but I used to babysit her younger siblings and knew how good I was. Nancy Wheeler is nothing but logical. She knew I would be good at it.”
“I spoke to a Nancy earlier,” Eddie said thoughtfully. “She really went to bat for you.”
“That’s Nance for ya,” Steve huffed. “Tenacious to a fault. This is her last semester at college and then she’s going to go to Emerson to get her journalism degree. She wanted to get her generals out of the way so she wasn’t paying out the ass for them.”
Eddie smiled. “Looks like I really lucked out then.”
“I guess you did,” Steve said softly. “I did too. Having you here these last couple of days have really helped out. They are still going to have the worst meltdowns during that first week you’re gone, but knowing you’ve already set the boundary they’ll only butt against it instead crossing it.”
Eddie smirked. “They’ve chased off nannies before. It’s why I have a very specific list of do’s and don’t’s with anyone I hire.”
“Oh I don’t doubt it,” Steve chuckled. “Normally, I’d put them to bed, but because it’s your last night with them, I’d suggest you do it.”
“Of course,” Eddie said softly. “Thank you for taking good care of them, Steve. I’m really grateful to be leaving them in such capable hands. I don’t want to go on this tour, not really. But I need a break. I love my girls, but with Ethan leaving it feels like he took away my right to chose how to live my life.”
Steve got up and moved to the desk and sat down on it half way. “But at least you have the money and the wherewithal to make sure they are taken care of. Every parent needs a break once in awhile. You’ll go out there make your fans happy and then when you come back, you’ll appreciate them all the more for leaving.”
Eddie looked up at him, then his eyes fluttered shut. He pursed his lips together and leaned his head back. He opened his eyes to look at him again. “You don’t think I’m being a bad parent?”
“It does you no good to burn yourself out,” Steve soothed. “It would do them more harm if you burned out and couldn’t take care of them anymore.”
“I love them so much,” Eddie said, his lower lip quivering. “But not having any help except Chrissy occasionally made it hard.” Tears trickled down his cheeks.
Steve pulled out a tissue and handed it to him. Eddie let out a watery chuckle. “You didn’t have anyone close that could help you?”
Eddie wiped his eyes and shook his head. “My former bandmates kinda scattered all over the globe. Gareth in Wales where his family is from, Jeff in New York, and Brian in LA. My uncle, Wayne broke his leg just after Ethan left and he’s just barely moving around without a cane. I couldn’t make him watch two rambunctious four year olds.”
He let out a shuddering breath and then another. “A lot of the nannies we had kept trying to be their mother. One was even caught trying to teach Joanie to call her Mama.”
“That’s rough,” Steve murmured. “But I’m here to help you. I’m not going to try and replace you as their dad. Or even Ethan, really. I’m just an extra person you can rely on.”
“You don’t mind setting up the household staff do you?” Eddie asked, his voice still rough from the crying. He blew his nose and then threw the tissue away in a nearby garbage. “It’s just that I want people that will work well with you and not try to fight you on every little thing.”
Steve shook his head. “No I get it. Plus getting help for a place as big as this one, I’d need the help otherwise I’d wear myself out before you got home.”
Eddie chuckled. “Do you like the house? Some of the other nannies thought it was creepy.”
“Mr. Muns–” Steve began but Eddie cut him off.
“Call me Eddie,” he said softly. “Mr. Munson makes me feel old and I’m not ready for that yet.”
“All right, Eddie,” Steve murmured back, “I think it’s spooky in a fun way. It’s not creepy. It’s beautifully decorated. I’ve seen creepy. Like tiger and elephant heads mounted on the walls with fully stuffed birds and in one horrifying case a Tasmanian wolf.”
“Aren’t those extinct?” Eddie asked with a grimace.
“Oh yeah,” Steve said, moving to sit on on the desk all the way, to put some distance between them. Before he did something stupid like kiss his boss. “I made sure to report his taxidermy to the Feds on the way out.”
“Brutal.”
“Dude was creep and his wife wasn’t much better,” Steve said with a shrug. “I felt sorry for their kids. They didn’t deserve having parents like those.”
“What made you leave?” Eddie asked, honestly curious on how Steve could have gone through so many clients considering he didn’t seem very old.
Steve kicked his feet a little, careful not to kick Eddie. “They aged out of needing one. They were already pre-teens when I got hired. They basically only needed someone to pick them up from school and make them dinner before their parents came home.”
“How long were you with them?” Eddie asked, more to keep Steve there then any real curiosity he had. Yeah, he had been curious about what made him leave, but this was blatant flirting at this point.
Steve laughed. “What’s this, more interview?” he teased. “No, in all seriousness, it was about a year. Most of my clients only need me temporarily anyway. I’m pretty sure that for at least three of them, their friends or family got to them about me being a guy, because they hired a female nanny soon after.”
“That’s bullshit,” Eddie huffed. “I’m sorry that they kept doing that to you. If anyone says anything to you, send them my direction. I’ll set them straight.”
“Thanks,” Steve murmured. He checked his watch. “It’s about time for me to make dinner.”
Eddie nodded and watched him leave. Once Steve had closed the door to his office behind him, Eddie put his head in his hands. It was so hard to keep his hands to himself when Steve was that close.
He just hoped that the three months he was going to be gone would be enough to put out the fire in his gut for his new nanny for fuck’s sake. He needed to get laid, Jesus fucking Christ!
The rest of the night passed with relative ease. Steve made meatloaf and garlic mashed potatoes with corn on the side.
Night time went well, too. Both girls drifting off to sleep quickly.
Morning, though? That was what was fraught with difficulties and tantrums.
Joan refused to get dressed, flopping on the floor and sobbing uncontrollably. Janice dumped her cereal on the floor, kicking and screaming like a toddler. Joan threw herself at the door while Janice tried to hide Eddie’s shoes.
Eddie stared Janice right in the eye as he pulled out another pair of shoes out of his carry-on. And then another out of his suitcase. He put the shoes back in the suitcase, but pulled on the shoes from his carry-on. All while Janice stood there with her jaw on the floor.
Steve pulled Joan away from the door so Eddie could open it and both girls started crying. Eddie hugged and kissed each girl goodbye.
Steve picked up both girls and held them up to the window so they could wave goodbye as Eddie drove off.
He set them down and they both flopped on the floor like ragdolls. He let them lay there for awhile, even taking advantage of Joan not moving to get her dressed. He put his hands on his hips it was going to be a long week. A very long week.
~
Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10
Tag List: CLOSED
1-@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog
2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system
3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog
4- @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji
5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon
6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman
7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth
8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss
9- @sadisticaltarts @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @dolphincliffs @steddie-as-they-go @steddieislife
10- @kultiras @morallyundefined @ollieolive @themoonagainstmers @tartarusknight
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ruruvxz · 5 months ago
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“10:36”
Girlfriend!Kim Minji x Cheater!Reader
ft. Marsh Danielle
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↳ synopsis: L/N Y/N, named one of the sweetest girl in the planet finally rots her girlfriend’s heart. Any sane person would feel sad, maybe even a little regretful and accommodating for all their wrong doings. Not Y/N though, she's kept it in for a long time, her heart has gone bitter and cold, and she knows what she’s doing is wrong, but who can blame such a sweetly wretched heart.
↳ cw: cheating, commitment issues, morally gray reader, codependency, Minji is lovesick and blind, hurt no comfort, reader has implied chronic depression, victim blaming, swearing, pure angst
↳ word count: 4.6k
a/n: read this Karina fic where she kept cheating on me… which gave me an striking idea, mentally ill, unapologetic, rude and overall not a good person, Reader! anyways you don’t need to listen to 10:36 but I highly recommend listening to it since it’s such a great song. And yes I am personally beefing with Y/N even if I wrote them (fluff ver. apple cider)
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Your eyes looming to the TV, not paying attention to whatever was playing. I mean you couldn't concentrate due to your phone blowing up, notification after notification of all your failed hookups barking at your phone like a rabid pack of dogs. God, do people know when to shut up nowadays? It was aggravating how much they pleaded for closure, and who were they to demand that from you? You're the sweet innocent Y/N L/N after all.
Before you even got to text them back some bullshit excuse your eyes darted to the front from the sudden click. You carefully examined the door pushing it open at an agonizingly slow pace, sighing as your eyes met Minji's as she slid her way inside, her eyes bagging with how deeply exhausted she was. She meets your blank stare with a meek smile, pushing down any emotions built inside of you after your recent rendezvous with another lover, you put on your best fictitious grin.
"Baby!" You cheered, getting up from the leather couch, the same one Minji gifted you when you both first moved in with one another. Quickening your pace as you ran towards her, wrapping your arms around her neck, Minji was left letting out a coy smile before kissing your cheek. Usually, she would be greeted by another empty living room with the kitchen light dimly lighting the surrounding vicinity, it was depressing but she had a 9/5 and you took the night shift. (Or that's what you would tell her.)
Needless to say, seeing your bright smile was more than pleasant, her overworked eyes lightening up as you continued to hug her. "Ah, bug, you're still here?" She smiled hugging you tighter, grasping you almost as if you were to disappear at any moment in time. As you both stand in each other's embrace your mind couldn't help but let your mind drift to someone else.
"Fuck, I wish Danielle was here with me..."
You knew how terrible it was to imagine someone else's grasp, especially since you were imagining your girlfriend's best friend of all people... And to be frank, there was no other valid explanation for feeling this way. But you felt so devoid of any strong emotion, it truly made you feel disgusted with yourself but what could you do?
Minji softly grabbed a piece of your hair to stroke before you eventually led her over to the couch to spend some quality time with her. I mean, that's the least you could do after what you went off doing while she wasn't home.
Danielle messaged you late last night wondering if she could plan an outing for the next day, and you (not-so) hesitantly agreed to her offer. It was a terrible thing to do since you've already learned about her immature crush on you, but it wouldn't lead to anything, right? Nevertheless, you still decided to get lunch together, and she brought you to your favorite hole-in-the-wall restaurant. (Not exactly, in reality, it was something you despised because it was the only restaurant Minji would bring you time and time again. Danielle, and many others, were under the assumption it was somewhere you LOVED going to. And who could blame them, you would always post photos promoting the establishment whilst hiding out Minji from any photo.)
It was a fusion restaurant, but the overall atmosphere was an American-style family diner. The ones you'd see in 80's sitcoms that Minji begged you to watch with you, it was tacky, but they stayed engraved in your head. Danielle would drag you to the table nearest to the window to get the clearest view of the sky, but you'd much rather sit in the booth in the corner, hidden away from the world. Of course, of how accommodating Danielle was she gave in to your request, despite that hiccup the day "outing" continued as scheduled. Eating her meal she ordered claims that the burgers are "The best she's ever had since moving from Australia" but in reality, you think it's nothing special.
You ordered the same thing you usually do, carnitas tacos messily plated on a plastic dish, it usually tasted so bland though somehow sharing it with her tasted so much better than eating it with anyone else. You hated to admit it because you already had someone waiting for you at home but she made the world stop for a bit, made staying still for a moment seem so... bearable. For once in your pathetic existence you felt like you understood something and just wanted to sit down and talk.
"Mmm, Y/N—it's really good!" Danielle spoke up, parts of her burger decorated the corners of her face as she munched. Laughing at her childlike behavior you wipe the excess crumbs off her mouth, noticing her slight blush plaster across her face as you pull back to speak.
"Mhm?" You replied turned off your phone and flipped it over on the table giving her your full attention. Her voice was just too adorable to ignore. You knew you found yourself despicable for giving her more attention than you had given Minji for the past few months. But you couldn't stop yourself, it was so lonely and you just needed a warm body to hold, just until your girlfriend could come back to you.
She nodded her head hurriedly before shoving another fry into her mouth before she spoke once more. "Yup!! Look open your mouth" She'd pick up the fries and line it up up to your mouth, cautiously leaving your mouth agape before she shoved the fries into your mouth. It surprised you how fast she inserted it into your mouth you started aggressively coughing before she apologized profusely.
After your little outbreak, you start laughing uncontrollably at how concerned she looked, she whacked your head from the other side of the table while you continued to laugh. But you didn't have the heart to tell her that the fries she force-fed you tasted like generic McDonald's fries but, with that face, could you say anything? Danielle looked so captivating, an allure you hadn't felt in months, and before you knew it it was already 8:14. Minji comes back at 9 and you shouldn't risk coming home late AGAIN.
"Ah, I'm so sorry Dani, it's already so late, I need to be home at 9." You commented cutting her story off short about how she met up with a coworker of hers during some mindless shopping spree. She looked understanding but disappointed nevertheless as she was hoping she could spend more time with you even if it was in this cramped restaurant.
You looked into her eyes once more before getting up to take your leave, she looked stumped but quickly regained her composure as an idea flashed across her mind. "Okay! I'll drop you off at the train station then!" She stood up and let her hand out for you to grab. Once you stood up she interlocked your fingers together, your heart beating out of your chest as she did. What person would react like this to a friend, let alone someone who was in a relationship, but god were you one sick bastard to reason with yourself? You knew you'd done worse with others so why was this any different?
After minutes of slow walking and talking mindlessly with one another you finally arrived at the station, it was a tad disappointing but you knew it had to end soon. Climbing up the stairs your hands continued to lock in with one another, you felt her suddenly yank away. Turning back to see what happened you noticed one of her heels came off, but coincidentally your train just arrived.
"Oh Y/N go on, I'll get on the other one, it's just another 10 minutes!" She defensively said. Instead of listening to her you ran down the stairs and grabbed her heels, even if you were struggling a little bit to get back up you were happy to help her. You handed her back her heel as you heard the train plow through once more, the screeching metal tracks lingering as it drove off.
Danielle looked down at you as you handed her the heel with a worried face, she looked so bothered but you reassured her. "Even if the train leaves, it's worth it, it's worth waiting for you" You smiled before grabbing her hand once more and dragging her back up to the platform, the light-dark enough to cover her red face.
"Y/N" She laughed as she dropped her bag and hugged you tightly, her embrace was soft and loving you didn't want to leave it. (Nor do you deserve such an affectionate interaction.) You broke the hug before she led you to a, presumably empty, seating area, the sunlight dropping and sinking. While you sat there together Danielle was content sitting down with you in complete silence as it meant being by your side.
"I'm sorry for making you wait." She sighed awkwardly trying to break the silence you created, her body immediately straightened as you rested your head on her shoulder. Her breath hitched as you grabbed her warm hands, the nightfall being significantly colder.
"It's fine that we have to wait, I love you." You trailed off, your mind not proceeding with the bullshit you slurred out of your mouth. It was a force of habit, no matter if it was Danielle or Minji, those stupid strings of words haunted your every moment. (Maybe if you were a little cautious, if you learned to shut your mouth maybe you wouldn't have to be calling people at night while Minji was in deep sleep, explaining in slurred words "I have this thing where I— I can't be by myself— but look...")
The memory of what you accidentally slipped up to Danielle came back to haunt you, why would you ever say that, but regardless you couldn't break your facade now, not with Minji resting quietly on your lap. "How was your day love" You twirled her hair as she dozed off by your touch, she was so soft and delicate. It reminded you of how she'd do the same after a long day, her hands caressing your head like a dog. She was silent but that's who she was. As you ran your hand through her jet-black hair, you were all over he, losing yourself, all before she snapped you out of your daze to speak. "It was okay, but great now that you're with me." She smiled underneath you, she reached her hand above to your face to caress your mellow cheeks, and your heart ached as she did so.
"How was yours, my dear?" She lifted her head dragging you a bit down to intertwine your lips tenderly, as she pulled back and laid back down on your thighs you felt your teeth sink into your lips. It was a force of habit but thank god she hadn't noticed as her head was locked into the TV, you felt yourself about to throw up at the idea of telling her what you did. As usual, you tried to play off what happened this afternoon like nothing happened.
Your hands shook as you continued to play with her hair wondering what lies you would spit through your teeth. "Mmm, nothing much I hung out with some friends then went back home to wait for my wonderful girlfriend." You beamed smiling hopelessly to not break the persons you've created.
"Friends, who? I'd love to meet them." She chuckled, turning her head back to meet your gaze, your hands slowly lifting up and away from her head. You rested them on the armrest, coughing at the thought of her finding you were out and about with her best friends who she didn't even know you talked to.
"Just Dani! She's asked me if she wanted to get lunch with her." You answered honestly, if you hadn't you knew you'd just dig yourself a deeper hole and lead to another heated argument, where you'd end up running off to sleep the night somewhere else.
"Oh." She scoffed, the realization of her best friend and her girlfriend being closer than she'd expected hurt her feelings a little more than it originally should've.
"What's wrong with that." You bite back, annoyed about how sassy she was becoming day by day, as if you were doing something— someone, she wasn't aware of.
"It's just... didn't know you were close with her like that." She raised her body from my lap and sat properly looking me in the eye, clearly annoyed by the situation. (To be fair, as hard as you tried to be sneaky with your late-night affairs, by claiming you had a night shift, she picked up on your inconsistencies fairly quickly. How you'd leave either before she arrived or after she slept became more and more oddly suspicious. Or how you'd often slip your phone away to your back pocket whenever she came closer to you. It was all messing with her brain and the sudden "connection" you had with Danielle made her more and more suspicious.)
"I guess but isn't, Dani—Danielle one of your closest friends, yet you talk shit like this about her?" You retorted, trying to hide your offense terribly at her statement, of course, she didn't mean any harm with what she said but it felt as if she was insinuating something. Something you didn't like. You took off your gaze from hers as you rested your head on your palm and raised the volume of the TV to drown her out.
Rightfully annoyed at your reaction she raised her voice just a little bit. "Well sorry, I'm sorry I feel uncomfortable by the fact you chose to get lunch with my friend, instead of your girlfriend!" She rolled her eyes and folded her arms, her frustration was enough to cause global warming. You bite your tongue once more, you didn't want to say anything you regretted but you couldn't just let her take a jab at you without any conviction.
"I mean, she didn't do anything to you? Yet you're being so aggressive." You replied as you grabbed the remote with your free hand to skim through the channels, every new show being broadcast made you even more aggravated. How could there be nothing good showing? You mashed the next button again and again as you heard her open her mouth once more.
"That's not what I meant it's just, for the past few months you've cared about going out with me? Sorry for feeling like that's so terrible!" She scorned as you still didn't pay any attention to her, continuing to skim through the shows on air today. You pushed your tongue to the inside corner of your cheek before you asserted another retort.
"Maybe if you weren't always so defensive and angry I would hang out with you" You laugh sarcastically under your breath annoyed, and you finally landed on Law & Order. It was Minji's comfort show but you couldn't care less about what she liked right now, all you wanted her to do was pipe down and calm down. She clenched her jaw at how dismissive and disrespectful you were, the fact you weren't even looking at Minji added more salt to the wounds.
She grabbed your shoulder yanking you hard enough to look at her, you paid her one single glance before swatting her hand away from my shoulder. She looked dumbfounded, as for the first time in her life she finally raised her voice, this time with real intention to get off on you. "What the fuck— Y/N! What is up with you recently??"
Oh, she's testing you right now, your blood pressure has risen significantly and you felt it harder to focus on what they were saying in the show. Finally giving in you pushed your head to lock into her enraged state. "You know what's fucking 'up with me' it's your attitude? I can't even hang out with my friends anymore?"
Minji was most definitely fed up at this point as she stared back at you, clenching her fist, stopping her from saying something atrocious. "Oh no you DEFINITELY can, you know what you can't do? Fucking leave your girlfriend in the middle of the night saying you have a night shift and leave me alone in our bed!" She spat out as she stood up trying to get that notion into your thick skull.
"I'd rather be in someone else's embrace than be with yours! FUCK, you're so fucking suffocating!" You shouted back, quickly regretting what you said, realizing a little too late that you had released a bit more information than you were trying to let on. But before you could take it back and apologize she was already standing over you, her hands covering her mouth.
Minji’s jaw unclenched, processing every word that came out of your mouth. "What." Her voice sounded shaky, she tried her hardest to sound stern but you knew her long enough to know it was just a facade. Her face turned into someone who had just been told their loved one died, completely and utterly in disbelief.
It hurt seeing Minji so hurt, but it felt so good to get that out of your chest, she's been suffocating you for a year now, she should know where you’re coming from. Honestly, you hadn’t planned on staying for fairly long but after moving in with her it became harder to leave. "Fuck. It’s just—" You stopped before continuing “I wanna love you but I'm scared so I rather pretend”  You stood up and turned your body away from her, you didn't want to look at her at all. If you did, maybe you’d just run back by her side and then the cycle continues once more.
She covered her face between her palms, and looked up at the ceiling, just praying she'd wake up from this sick and twisted dream. "Y/N, please tell me. Are you?" She mumbled underneath her hands, but enough for me to tell what she said.
"Am I, what? Am I cheating on you?" You turned back at her with a disgusted face, not at her, but at yourself, you couldn’t fathom how you’d do something like this. After all, you experienced the same thing. You felt sick to your stomach but you knew she should already puzzle the answer together, yet she's still trying to ask.
"Just answer the fucking question" Her voice bubbling up with rage, after all the years of committing herself to you, you turn your back and do this? Oh how badly she wanted to make your life miserable after this. But a part of her didn't want to ask this question, she wanted, somehow, someway, you would turn a full 180 and tell her this was all some sick twisted joke.
“Fuck you Y/N… truly, fuck you— you kept me like a secret but I kept you like a fucking oath.” She spat out, grabbing out to you, the weight of your actions felt like a knife digging itself deeper into your heart. You were too cowardly to look at her, let alone answer her question. For someone so confident about cheating on her, you know stood in front of her unwilling to face the consequences.
"I—“ You cut yourself off, you did feel awful as you stared into her fiery gaze, but what was the point she already knew? "I’m so sorry.” You blurted out, it honestly came out as a statement then it did an apology, and by the looks of it, she looked even more infuriated.
"FUCK Y/N, PLEASE JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION!" She screamed at you, making you jump a little, but with your broken ego, you weren’t going to take that, with crossed arms you announced your wholehearted answer.
"Yeah, I did, and it wasn’t with Danielle. Don’t worry about her…" You bitterly bit back trying to get it in through to her, you were truly so despised at this moment, but to save face you preached some half-assed excuse.
"You know Minji, it isn’t my fault— You're selfish, how do you not get it. For as long as I remember you've only ever thought about yourself." You said, leaving Minji to stand in utter anguish at the shit you were spewing. How could she be the selfish one? You bit back your tongue before realizing this was probably the only moment to let out everything you’ve built up over your whole relationship.
"I reach for you and you’re not there, I'm so fucking numb but you don't care. A part of me feels for you, but it hurts, it hurts so much." Her stare etching deeper into your mind, she didn’t bite back, but you could see through her fuming portrayal that tears were pooling from her eyes.
"enlighten me, my dear, why am I still here? Why did you even— why did you even pick me? You don't talk to me, you never want to talk about anything and you’re always just with Hanni. I know you're confused and hurt, but when I needed a warm body to hold, you were never there. And when you where you wanted too much from me— I didn’t know how I could give you everything" You inched closer to her wiping the tears off her face, she placed her hand on top of yours. Maybe this was the only emotionally intimate time you both had in months. As you rested her hand on her plush cheeks, you took a moment to appreciate her beauty one last time, she was gorgeous, undoubtedly, gorgeous.
(You couldn’t admit to yourself that this reminded you about the first time you met, your eyes locked with hers as she stumbled out of another stress-inducing meeting. She looked so out of it so you graciously offered her your apple cider, under the pretense that it was apple juice. You examined her as you were a bit surprised a young girl like her was working this late into the night, it was already 10:36. You looked back at her while stopping to laugh loudly as her eyes winced while chugging down your drink. She looked so annoyed but somewhat happy she met you, her drowsy eyes lighting up as you offered to get her an actual drink at a nearby bar. You had a bad habit of analyzing her, her hair smelt like a sweet fruit punch, and her smile was so infectious.
You remember holding her face just like this as you led her back to her apartment, she looked dazed out of her mind as you pulled her on her leather couch to rest. In a drunken state, she commented on how she liked your hair and pulled you down into her lap to play with it. You couldn’t stop your face from heating up but she didn’t happen to notice, she looked down at you and complimented the jacket you wore. So after that you always wore it, and even at this exact moment, you were wearing that stupid jacket once more.)
"I didn’t— as much as I hate you right now maybe we just got lost in translation… no— maybe I asked for too much." She weakly smiled biting back her rage while staring deeply at you.
"I've done the math there's no solution, we'll never last, I’m so sorry Minji, there’s just no universe where I can see our happy ending." Minji closed her eyes, biting her lips, maybe she already lost you, or maybe she never had you in the beginning, but all she knew this would be your last moments holding each other. Your heart constantly aching throughout the whole ordeal, as she leaned her head closer to yours your lips slowly touched, having one last passionate kiss, until you broke it up. Minji looked at you with sorrowful yet entrancing eyes as she connected your foreheads, forcing you both to lie in the moment.
"in the morning you're not in my bed, I'll just sleep until I fall dead, my love" She joked weakly as you intertwined your lips together once more before letting out a deep sigh. "I guess this is where you get your stuff and leave, Y/N" She pathetically laughed and more tears streamed down her face.
"Yeah, don't worry I'll be gone by tomorrow..." You turned away taking a breather, before taking one last look at the living room that we had built together. The walls were decorated with inside jokes and pictures you took together, you inspected every one of them, knowing she’d probably throw them out later on in life. Your eyes landed on the coffee pot she gifted you on your anniversary, she built it during her pottery lessons to surprise you, it didn’t work so well, but it was cute. You sigh as you look at the pictures all from different occasions like when you celebrated your first Christmas with her, or when she met your parents, the memories of each decoration hitting you like a train.
"Where are you going to go?" She asked trying to figure out where you’ll run off to now, you laughed for a moment, before looking back at her. Her hands balling up as she awaited your answer, you cupped her face again and smiled at her question.
"Probably crash out with my ex-roommate if she still has a spare room somewhere."
"Oh, uhm…" She laughed elegantly and hugged you tightly not wanting to let you go. "I'll drop you off wherever— whenever you need to go, just please stay with me tonight. It's only…” She trailed off looking at the clock.
“10:36,” You both say in unison.
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guys count how much I referenced other songs… anyways back to writing fluff im literally started to tweak out
192 notes · View notes
torahoes · 1 month ago
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(IDOLiSH7) Touma Inumaru - 16PRODUCERS Rabbit Chat
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Please note that I am not a professional translator. If you come across any mistakes, feel free to let me know and I will make the necessary corrections.
Shiro Utsugi: Good work today! It’s almost time!
Shiro Utsugi: No one’s here yet...?
Shiro Utsugi: Maybe if I send a bunch of messages, the notifications will catch someone’s attention
Shiro Utsugi: Alright then, I’ll try talking about my breakfast or something
Shiro Utsugi: This morning, I had rice balls, rolled omelet, sausages, and miso soup with nameko mushrooms. It’s been a while since I cooked in the morning, so I went all out a bit
Touma Inumaru: Ahhhhhh Utsugi-san!!!! I had yakisoba bread for breakfast! Cooking so early in the morning is impressive!!
Touma Inumaru: No, wait — sorry, could you hang on a second…? I accidentally spilled a bag of chips all over my room and I’m cleaning it up now
Shiro Utsugi: That’s a major crisis!! I’ll wait for you…! Isumi-san is over at your place today too, right?
Haruka Isumi: Good work today
Haruka Isumi: Yup, I’m hanging out at Touma’s place right now! My breakfast was natto rice, grilled salmon, spinach ohitashi, and tofu miso soup!
Haruka Isumi: Oh, and sorry for responding late! Touma tried to open a bag of chips just now and it went boom! and scattered everywhere lmaoo
Touma Inumaru: The bag just wouldn't open so I ended up using way too much force 😂
Shiro Utsugi: Ah… I get it, there are times when they’re strangely hard to open…! And thank you both for sharing what you had for breakfast as well!
Haruka Isumi: Picking a topic like this is so you, Utsugi-san. So you eat stuff like potato chips too, huh 🤔
Shiro Utsugi: I like them quite a bit. The seaweed and salt flavored chips make for a great snack to enjoy with drinks, too.
Haruka Isumi: By the way, Touma doesn’t have a vacuum cleaner at his place. Isn’t that crazy? The tiny crumbs on the carpet won’t come out
Haruka Isumi: Hold on, he just came back holding a lint roller like he's some kind of hero brandishing a sword lmao
Touma Inumaru: I'm telling you, this thing can handle most cleaning jobs!
Haruka Isumi: It can't!
Shiro Utsugi: I get it. Lint rollers are really convenient! I used one for most of my cleaning back when I was a student as well.
Touma Inumaru: You too, Utsugi-san!? That makes us comrades! ✨
Haruka Isumi: I didn't know Utsugi-san was like that too
Shiro Utsugi: Indeed, I am.
Touma Inumaru: Oh, then, Utsugi-san, did you play games when you were a student? 😳 Haru brought one over, and we were playing it earlier!
Shiro Utsugi: Ryo-kun made me play with him a bunch of times. What kind of game were you two playing?
Touma Inumaru: It’s a game where you’re a rabbit working part-time at a restaurant! 🍴
Haruka Isumi: You have to prepare the ordered dishes within the time limit, but there’s a lot to do like chopping ingredients and washing dishes, so it’s pretty fun! My fingers got tired from spamming the buttons too quick while slicing cabbages 😂
Touma Inumaru: Actually, doesn’t this sound like the kind of game Ryo-san would love!?
Haruka Isumi: I wonder.... I think he would....?
Touma Inumaru: Utsugi-san, if you play it with Ryo-san, please let me know how it goes! 🤩
Shiro Utsugi: Ah, so it’s already decided I’ll play it with him. I’ll recommend it to him when I get the chance!
Touma Inumaru: Oh, I forgot to mention that the cleaning’s all done! Sorry for the wait!!
Shiro Utsugi: Alright! Let’s begin, then! We've been asked to capture your usual interactions in a cozy setting, as if you were sitting at a dinner table, so we’ll be conducting this discussion on Rabbit Chat!
Shiro Utsugi: How did you feel when you heard Isumi-san would be producing you, Inumaru-san?
Touma Inumaru: I was super happy ‼️ Of course, I would've been thrilled if it were Mina or Tora instead too, but Haru is, how do I put it… special
Touma Inumaru: I really respect Haru as an artist. He never skips vocal training, always works on his basics, and studies all kinds of music genres
Touma Inumaru: Seeing how disciplined and dedicated he is always motivates me.
Touma Inumaru: So, you know, just thinking about how someone like Haru would go about producing me — it made me so happy; my heart was racing with excitement ‼️😆
Haruka Isumi: Hm....
Haruka Isumi: So you respect me
Touma Inumaru: Isn't that obvious!? You’ve been singing, dancing and practicing hard all on your own since you were little
Touma Inumaru: Back when I was that age, I was just running around playing all the time
Touma Inumaru: But Haru... you were doing it for your grandma…...
Haruka Isumi: Why are you the one crying lmaooo
Touma Inumaru: HARU~~~ WE'LL ALWAYS BE TOGETHER, OKAY???
Haruka Isumi: Huh? Now isn't THAT obvious?
Shiro Utsugi: I feel like crying as well..…
Haruka Isumi: Geez! You're both grown-ups, cut it out already!! I haven’t even had a chance to talk about my production yet 😤
Touma Inumaru: Sorry 😭
Shiro Utsugi: Isumi-san, you expressed Inumaru-san through a ballad. I figured you would go with a rap-heavy track, so it was surprising!
Touma Inumaru: Right! I got chills as soon as I heard the intro
Touma Inumaru: I could feel that Haru really considers me — all three of us — special. Even without him saying a word, I felt like his feelings came through
Haruka Isumi: Touma, you always say embarrassing stuff like it’s nothing. Well, you’re not wrong....
Haruka Isumi: Like Utsugi-san said, I thought about going for something more intense, but the way we, his teammates, see him — there's more to him than just that
Haruka Isumi: So, um
Touma Inumaru: What's wrong?
Haruka Isumi: I'm about to give it my allllll and say something suuupeeeeer embarrassing right now too, so
Touma Inumaru: O-Okay, I get it, so stop hitting my back!! Do you want some orange juice?
Haruka Isumi: Not right now!
Haruka Isumi: Touma, you’re... how should I put it... you're warm. Even when I used to be cold towards you or tried to keep my distance, you always had your arms open, waiting for me, and you welcomed me warmly every time. You made me feel like I wasn’t alone
Haruka Isumi: So, I wanted to create a song that would make the people listening to it feel the same way — like they're not alone, like they can take a step forward and face what's ahead — a song that's like a good-luck charm
Haruka Isumi: Just like how being with you helped the three of us do the same
Touma Inumaru: Haru
Haruka Isumi: What
Touma Inumaru: I !!!!! LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU THREE, SO MUCH!!!!!!!!
Haruka Isumi: Don’t shout about stuff like that so loudly!! It’s super embarrassing, you’re gonna bother the neighbors!!!!
Shiro Utsugi: I love the four of you as well....!
Touma Inumaru: Utsugi-san...!!! 😭😭😭
Haruka Isumi: Seriously, what's wrong with these grown-ups!? You guys haven't been drinking, have you!?
Touma Inumaru: I'm completely sober ‼️ I’m drinking melon soda ‼️
Touma Inumaru: But, I see… so that’s why the lyrics were "Look beside you.”
Haruka Isumi: Well, yeah. You've always been the one leading us forward, so
Haruka Isumi: If you ever feel anxious, I’m there right next to you
Haruka Isumi: I’ll support you as your fellow center
Touma Inumaru: I’m seriously so lucky to have met you guys!
Touma Inumaru: Thank you for teaching me what it's like to have teammates like you
Haruka Isumi: Well, of course! We’re your REAL teammates, after all
Haruka Isumi: Hey--!! Touma won't stop ruffling my hair!!!
Haruka Isumi: My hair’s all messed up now!!
Touma Inumaru: Haru’s hair is silky smooth!
Shiro Utsugi: I’m jealous. Can I also try petting you next time?
Haruka Isumi: Don’t say it like you’re talking about petting a cat!
Shiro Utsugi: My apologies! 🐾 Now then, I’d like to ask about the artist photoshoot next. The location you chose was beautiful!
Touma Inumaru: It was such a great place! The ginkgo-lined path was stunning 🍂
Haruka Isumi: Wasn't it? I thought it really suited Touma 🍂
Touma Inumaru: Seriously? What part of it!?
Haruka Isumi: Promise you won’t laugh?
Touma Inumaru: Huh!? Of course I won't! It's something you put a lot of thought into choosing, with me in mind
Haruka Isumi: Then I’ll tell you...
Haruka Isumi: I walked through there alone not long ago, and the soft, warm colors of the ginkgo trees felt like they were enveloping me. I thought it would be amazing if we could walk here together and take your artist photos
Haruka Isumi: The season you were born in is a cold one with chilly, biting winds, but being with you makes me feel so warm and comforted that I forget all about it
Haruka Isumi: That's why the scenery kinda reminded me of you...
Touma Inumaru: Haru....
Touma Inumaru: Honestly.... I don’t even know what to say right now, but I’m so incredibly happy. I’m not the kind of person who deserves such praise from you
Touma Inumaru: But I was really touched that the lyrics kept reminding me, again and again, that I have my friends by my side. It made me realize all over again that my purpose in life is to keep singing as part of ŹOOĻ.
Touma Inumaru: Keep singing next to me forever, Haru
Haruka Isumi: Woah, that was a killer line. Right back at you!
Touma Inumaru: Utsugi-san! Haru and I just did a fist bump! 👊👊
Shiro Utsugi: Oh, thank you for sharing that with me! Lovely ŹOOĻ as always! 👊👊 Did the decision to have Inumaru-san's costume stray from his usual hard-edged style come from wanting to express his warmth?
Haruka Isumi: Yup, I paired a white knit sweater with a scarf to create a softer impression 👌
Touma Inumaru: I don’t usually wear knitwear, so it felt fresh! I was worried if it would suit me, but the shoot turned out great thanks to Haru 😳✨
Haruka Isumi: Touma, I'm pretty sure you can pull off anything
Touma Inumaru: For real? Even bold clothes like Tora’s, with my chest fully exposed?
Touma Inumaru: Hey, don’t laugh Haru lololol
Haruka Isumi: Sorry lol, I couldn’t help it once I pictured it LMAO
Touma Inumaru: That's kinda annoying 😂 Maybe I should borrow Tora’s clothes and try it soon!?
Haruka Isumi: Oh man, I’m so looking forward to this LOL. Let’s rate his look together, Utsugi-san!
Shiro Utsugi: Me too!? Actually, that might not be a bad idea. We could uncover some new possibilities for ŹOOĻ…!
Haruka Isumi: What kind of "new possibilities" are we uncovering by having Touma show off his bare chest? LMAOO
Touma Inumaru: LOL
Shiro Utsugi: My apologies; that took an amusing turn, didn't it? 🐾 Now, to wrap things up, could you share a final message for your fans?
Haruka Isumi: Everyone! What did you think of the Touma I produced? Maybe some of you were surprised, maybe the others saw it coming. You see, to us, ŹOOĻ is this precious place we finally found — the place where we truly belong, and the one who's been standing at the forefront, protecting it all this time, is Touma
Haruka Isumi: That’s why I wanted to tell Touma, who’s been protecting ŹOOĻ, that we’re here for him too, and that his place is right here with us. And I could do that all thanks to the fans’ support! Thank you so much! Keep watching over us forever, okay?
Touma Inumaru: Being able to sing a song that promises a future with my members is something so special it turns my world upside down, and the fact that Haru made that happen means so much to me
Touma Inumaru: Haru made it sound like I'm amazing, but I’m really not. I used to turn a blind eye to things I didn’t like. I used to treat everyone but me as my enemy. I was childish.
Touma Inumaru: But the reason I was able to change was because I found a place I truly want to protect from the bottom of my heart. It's thanks to the fans, who directed their warm, sincere feelings at us head-on
Touma Inumaru: Listening to "Heart to Heart," I was reminded of that once again. This song is like a good-luck charm to me, and it’d be awesome if it became one for all of you too! Let’s dream about ŹOOĻ’s future together!
Shiro Utsugi: Thank you! I feel like this conversation between you two turned out to be something truly special!
Touma Inumaru: Yeah, I think so too! The fact that Haru said so much today... 😭
Haruka Isumi: It's nothing. I can praise you more anytime you want if that's what you'd like.
Touma Inumaru: For real!? Haru, you’re kinda cool today
Haruka Isumi:
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Touma Inumaru: Wanna play that restaurant game again?
Haruka Isumi: Yeah!! Let’s make the best restaurant ever! Let’s invite Torao and Minami and play multiplayer with all four of us!!! 🎮
Touma Inumaru: This cute side of Haru really puts me at ease 😆 Let’s keep going forever — the four of us, together!
The End.
112 notes · View notes
flightlessangelwings · 1 year ago
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Right Where We Belong
Loki x gn!reader
Word count- 3.7k
Dialogue prompt- “ you underestimate how much you mean to me. i wasn’t about to let them hurt you. and i certainly wasn’t about to let them even consider killing you. “ Action prompt-[ SECRET ]: sender, having been secretly following the receiver, saves their life from an immediate threat while remaining hidden from the receiver.
Warnings- s.mut (18+ ONLY!), protective!Loki, mutual pining, harassment, kidnapping, minor character death offscreen, feelings, romantic s.ex, praise, takes place mostly in a woodsy/forest area but I left it open as to where in the world it is, pet names (lovely, darling), no use of y/n
Notes- For my Year of Protectiveness @yearofcreation2023 . I've actually had a rough idea of this story in my head for about a year it just took some time to flesh it out and get it right. For that reason too, there's no series spoilers and is ambiguous as to where it fits on the timeline so you can imagine whenever.
This can be read as a prequel to In My Arms (Over and Over Again) but it can be read on its own. That fic is one of my pride and joys though so I recommend reading it after this one! Enjoy!
@flightlessangelwings-updates is my update blog so feel free to also follow that and turn on post notifs to stay up to date on when I post new stuff!
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~
Midgard… Earth. It was the last place Loki ever expected to find himself, let alone willingly. Yet, it was the last place anyone would ever think to look for him. So it’s where he found himself when he wanted to be alone, unbothered by any pressures that surrounded him.
Loki had no idea where on the planet he was, but it didn’t matter. The trees of the forest surrounded him and created a shelter of peace where he would just breathe. The warmth of the sun hit his skin, and the fresh air from the trees filled his lungs. It was refreshing. It was peaceful. It was everything he needed.
But, as he made his way through the forest with his eyes closed, listening to the sound of the birds around him, another sound made his eyes shoot open. The roar of a large animal snapped any notion of peace out of Loki’s mind as he found himself nearly face to face with bared, sharp teeth. He wasn’t worried, though, and he smirked as he brandished his dagger in his hand.
Just as Loki was about to attack, however, a voice from behind him made him freeze.
“Wait!”
Loki paused.
The voice continued, “It’s not aggressive, not really,” you were calm as you spoke, “Keep eye contact and back away slowly and it’ll leave you alone. There’s no need to kill it.”
Loki pondered his options. He could easily kill the beast and be done with it. But, there was something about your voice that swayed him, so he did as you instructed. Slowly, he stepped back, putting more distance between himself and the wild animal until it stopped growling and turned away. As it did so, Loki let out a deep breath. 
You also let out a sigh of relief as the tall stranger with black hair got closer to you, “She’s just defending herself,” you explained, “Must be a den or a nest around here somewhere. I bet she just had babies too.”
A smirk lit up Loki’s face, “Would you give that benefit of a doubt to anyone?” he asked as he turned to face you, revealing his face to you.
You gasped as you brought your hands to your face, “You’re…” your body tensed as you clearly recognized who you found in the woods, “Loki…”
“Would you have said the same thing if you knew who I was?” Loki challenged, yet no malice was heard in his voice, “Would you grant me the same courtesy?”
Silence filled the air between the two of you for several moments, the tension palpable. But, you exhaled, releasing the tension in your body as you did so, “I guess I would be a hypocrite if I said no, huh?” you said, trying to ease the tension.
Somehow, it worked, and it made Loki let out a genuine laugh. Something he hadn’t done in so long, and if he had to admit, felt nice. “What is your name?” he asked.
You told him. 
“Lovely,” Loki said genuinely.
It all blossomed from there. You and Loki fell into conversation easily and naturally, as if you had known each other for a lifetime. And the more time you spent in his presence, the more at ease you felt, not that you were scared of him in the first place. Nervous, yes, but Loki had a calming air about him, and something told you it was ok. And Loki, for one reason or another, felt comfortable around you. You had the same calming aura about you that Loki felt drawn to, and he found he actually wanted to stay and talk to you longer.
That never happened with anyone before… Loki wondered why that was. 
Before you knew it, the sun started to set, and you looked up with a gasp, “It’s getting late,” you breathed, “I…” you paused as you stared into Loki’s eyes, “I should go.”
Loki bid you farewell with a nod and watched you leave. And he already decided he was going to keep an eye on you until you were safe. He wasn’t going to let you know, though, and he stayed in the shadows, keeping watch over you from afar. And as he did, he couldn’t help but notice the new feeling in his chest. Sure, Loki had bedded princes and princesses, lords and ladies, and common men and women. But, you… you were different. And he couldn’t help the feeling of fondness towards you.
You seemed to know the path well, and you made your way to the clearing at the edge of the woods in no time. Behind you was the fantasy world, the forest, the place where your life just changed forever. In front of you was the real world, civilization, the daily grind. Taking a deep breath, you took the first step back into reality. 
But, as you started to leave, you suddenly found that you were not alone. A chill ran up your spine as a group of men whistled at you, and closed in on you quickly.
“Hey there sweetheart,” one of them grinned darkly.
You didn’t reply, but your hands shook as you looked around for an escape plan.
“Oh come on, don’t be like that,” another chimed in, “We just want to talk to you.”
A whimper escaped your lips as you hated the helpless feeling that came over you. But, a growl in the distance called all your attention, and everyone snapped over and saw a shadowy creature. All that was visible were glowing eyes and sharp teeth, but it was enough to scare the men away. You, on the other hand, backed away and tried to make yourself smaller in hopes that whatever it was would chase them, and you let out a heavy breath when you felt a rush of wind past you and heard a roar in the distance where the men ran off to.
You stood still for several moments as you processed what happened. For some time, you didn’t dare move, yet something within said you were safe. There was a familiar feeling around the air, as if you were being watched. Yet, you didn’t feel threatened like with the men who approached you. Looking around, you took one tentative step away from where you stood  in hopes of finding someone, yet you were alone. After letting out a deep breath, you turned and left, smirking to yourself; you had a hunch who was responsible for the shadowy creature that saved your life. After all, you did notice that the shadowy creature had bright green eyes.
In the shadows, Loki smiled with satisfaction.
*
One week to the day later, you found yourself back at the same spot. You weren't sure why or what you were expecting, yet you couldn’t help but find your way back there. The sun shone through the trees, warming your skin, and you felt at peace here.
“Well, it looks as if you and I had similar ideas, darling,” a voice chimed through the trees.
“Loki,” you breathed as you turned around and met his gaze. The tension you momentarily held in your shoulders melted away and you grinned widely, “Were you stalking me?” you asked cheekily.
“Never,” Loki replied, “It seems mere coincidence that we both came back to this spot on the same day.”
You gave him a pointed look, but the smirk never left your face, keeping the tone light.
“I promise,” Loki raised his hands in mock surrender, “I’ll never lie to you, my lovely.”
Your breath caught in your throat as the world around you suddenly felt hot, “I.. Uhhh,” you stumbled over your words, unsure of how to respond, “Thanks,” you decided on in a low mumble.
Loki returned the grin you gave him earlier, “Shall we sit, darling?” 
It turned into a routine for the two of you. Every week on the same day at the same time, you and Loki met in the woods. It was your escape from the world for both of you. It became a comfort for each of you to seek solace in the other. Although neither of you ever officially made plans, or said you’d be back the next week, you always were. 
For you, it was an escape from your life, from your stresses, to meet with Loki. And though you never thought you’d make friends with a Norse god, you were grateful for him. You tried to ignore the way your heart fluttered when you realized tomorrow was your meeting day, and you forced your heart to calm its wild beating as you stood in the woods waiting for him.
And as for Loki, he felt the same way. He never expected to find peace and solidarity on earth, and he certainly didn’t expect to fall… Loki laughed at himself, for so long he chastised his brother for loving someone from earth and here he was… They have more in common than Loki cared to admit. And he wasn’t ready to fully admit his feelings for you yet. They were there though.
Loki paced around the forest; it was unusual for you to not be there waiting for him. It was rare he felt nervous, but Loki couldn’t help the sinking feeling in his gut. Everything in him screamed that something was wrong, and after he waited long enough, Loki decided he was going to look for you.
And may the gods help if anyone hurt you…
*
You groaned as your body ached. The last thing you remembered was that you were on your way to meet Loki for your weekly rendezvous when you bumped into a group of men who looked like they were up to go good. You gasped and tried to run, but one of them grabbed you. You tried to scream, but no one heard you, and the last thing you heard before a cloth covered your face was, “Wrong place wrong time, sweetheart.”
And that was how you found yourself in a locked room tied to a chair, blindfolded and gagged. You wiggled in your binds as much as you could, but it was no use. They were tied too tight, and you had no idea where you were anyway even if you could break free. You didn’t even know what time or what day it was. And you whimpered softly when you realized that you would most likely never see Loki again…
Or so you thought.
Gunshots and screams from a distance called your attention and you snapped up to strain to listen. You faced where the source of the sound was, even if you couldn’t see anything. You didn’t dare move, however, since you had no idea what was happening. Were you going to be safe with whoever attacked the men who kidnapped you? Or would it be worse? You held your breath, pressing your lips together as you tried to calm your trembling hands.
The screaming went on for what felt like hours, and you could only imagine what the men were fighting in their last moments. Part of you didn’t want to dwell on it, but part of you had to have hope that whoever it was would be your savior. You never, however, expected to hear your name after the screaming stopped.
“Loki?” you whispered. When his voice called your name again, you shouted back, “Loki!”
The door burst open, and you heard Loki breathe your name in relief as he rushed over and untied you, “You’re alright, it’s me.”
“Loki?” tears filled your eyes as you were filled with disbelief that he was actually here. He actually came. For you. “You…?”
“I’m here,” he cupped your face, “Are you hurt?”
You shook your head as you felt your body tremble, “A little sore, but I’m ok,” you froze as you looked into his eyes and your heart skipped a beat at the look on his face, “Loki… You… You came for me?” your voice was shaky. 
Loki grinned, “Darling… You underestimate how much you mean to me. I wasn't about to let them hurt you. and I certainly wasn’t about to let them even consider killing you.”
Before you could stop yourself, you lunged forward and kissed him deeply. Your bodies smashed together as you pushed everything you had into him, clinging to him hard. You trembled as your emotions overwhelmed you and for a moment, you lost yourself into the feeling of Loki’s lips. It brought a comfort unlike anything you were expecting, and a lone tear fell down your cheek. But, then you realized what you did.
“I’m sorry,” you breathed as you tried to pull away, “I don’t know what came over me.”
Loki just mumbled your name as he cupped your chin and gently turned you so you met his gaze. There was a sure look in his eyes, and it told you everything you needed to know. This time, it was Loki who closed the gap between your faces, kissing you once more. His kiss was more tender, but very purposeful, and Loki wasted no time in darting his tongue past your lips.
You moaned into the kiss as you lost yourself in the emotions once more. For a moment, you forgot where you were as Loki became your entire world. Nothing existed beyond him and his kiss. And the taste of him was immediately intoxicating.
But, neither of you could stay like that forever, and after one last peck on your lips, Loki broke away. He stayed close to you, however, and his voice stayed low and soft and comforting, “Let’s get you out of here.”
Without a word, you nodded.
*
“Sorry it’s not much,” you stood nervously at your front door as you let Loki inside your place, “It must be completely different than what you’re used to…”
Loki caressed you as he reassured you, “It’s wonderful, darling,” he purred. Truthfully, he wasn’t even paying much attention to your place; Loki couldn’t take his eyes off of you.
Feeling his heavy gaze on you, you turned back from where your eyes wandered around the living space and you felt a tingle up your spine at the way Loki eyed you, “Loki…” you whispered. 
Time felt like it stopped as you stared into each other’s eyes. Your breath caught in your chest as you felt your heart pound. Between the way his hands cradled your form and the way he looked at you with those dark eyes, you knew exactly what Loki was thinking. And before you lost your nerve, you made your move.
You crashed yourself into him as you pressed your lips into his. Loki immediately yanked your close, his hands roaming up and down your sides as he deepened the kiss. Both of you moaned into each other as you savored the taste of the other. Heat rose in the room as passions erupted, and there was only one thing on both of your minds.
“Bedroom is this way,” you murmured, your tone low, “You want to…?”
“I thought you’d never ask, my lovely,” Loki smirked.
Sliding your hand in his, you led the way, and Loki kept a cheeky grin on his face as he waved his hand the moment you crossed into the bedroom. Suddenly, all your clothes were piled neatly on the dresser, his next to yours. Before you could react to his antic, Loki pounced on you, crashing both your bodies onto the bed.
You landed on your back with Loki overtop of you. You gasped as you found yourself in such a vulnerable position, yet you weren’t scared. You could never be scared of Loki. No, there was a different feeling that pulsed through your veins, and it made your body warm at the thought of what was to come. 
Loki hovered over you, his hands on either side of your body. As he trailed up and down your figure with his eyes, Loki felt his cock harden and his heartbeat quicken, “You are absolutely lovely,” he purred, “A decadence of perfection.”
All you could do was whimper as your mind went blank. No one ever whispered such sweet and beautiful words to you, or about you, before. Your hands roamed all over Loki’s bare chest, and you felt a rush of need between your legs as he groaned at your touch. “Please, Loki,” you whispered, “Don’t tease me right now.”
He smiled down at you as he caressed the side of your head, “Don’t worry, darling,” Loki’s tone was just as low as yours, “Let me show you how a god makes love.”
The moan you let out echoed in the room as Loki leaned in and attached his lips to your skin. With expert precision, he nibbled and licked and sucked at every spot that made you mewl, as if he had touched you a thousand times before. Loki groaned into your skin as he kissed his way across your chest before latching onto your nipple.
You arched your back, allowing Loki more access to your body as you dug into his shoulders. Your mind swam in pleasure as he swirled his tongue around your nipple, driving you wild. Bucking your hips into his, you murmured his name once more, begging him for more.
“I’ve got you, darling,” Loki hummed as he kissed his way back up your body, “Exquisite,” his voice was a low rumble that went right to your core. Loki noticed of course, “You like that, darling?” he asked, amused.
He didn’t give you the chance to properly answer as he rocked his hips against yours, dragging his cock between your legs. The action made you moan even louder and you dropped your head down onto the mattress. “Fuck… Loki…”
He exhaled sharply with a grin as he did it again, feeling a tingle up his down spine as he rocked himself against your body. But, as much as Loki wanted to prolong this, the way you cried out, and especially moaned his name, made him more impatient than usual. “Are you ready, darling?” he asked as he reached between your bodies and lined his cock up with your entrance.
“Yes,” you replied immediately, “Please, Loki.”
Loki groaned as he slowly pushed himself inside you, feeling your warmth engulf him. Both of you gasped loudly as he filled you inch by inch. You cried out as he pushed deeper inside you, and you wrapped your arms and legs around him as much as you could, holding him tightly.
Once Loki’s hips met yours, he immediately started a slow yet harsh pace. Skin slapped against skin as Loki drove his cock into you over and over again. Your mouth dropped open as the moans and cries flowed freely- music to his ears.
“That’s it, darling,” Loki purred, “So beautiful…” he mourned your name as he lost himself in you.
As Loki’s cock hit that one spot deep inside you, your eyes shot open and you screamed louder, “Loki! Fuck! Yes!”
He growled as he picked up his pace, aiming for that spot every time, “I’m close too, darling,” he groaned, “Fuck, you’re so lovely.”
“Loki…” you whimpered as you saw stars and felt your skin tingle.
It only took a few more thrusts for you to completely fall apart and you came with a loud scream. Your nails dug into his skin as your entire body trembled. Never in your life had you felt a pleasure like this, and it brought fresh tears to your eyes from the overwhelming sensations.
Loki groaned as he watched the spectacle you put on just for him. His arms trembled as he fought to keep himself overtop of you, not wanting to miss a moment of your climax. Although you couldn’t hear over your screams, Loki mumbled soft praises as you came on his cock. And he had never seen anything in the nine realms more beautiful than you were right there in that moment.
And that was when Loki couldn’t hold back any more. He came hard, his own orgasm overtaking his entire body. And Loki did something he had never done before in bed- he moaned your name as he spilled himself deep inside you. Tears of his own formed in the corners of his eyes as he gave one last thrust before he fell forward.
Heavy breaths filled the room as you both came down from your highs. Loki placed a series of feather light kisses on your skin wherever he could reach as he caressed your body tenderly. Once he gathered his strength, he carefully pulled out of you, kissing the side of your head as you gasped. Loki didn’t go far, though, and he settled in your bed with you gathered safely and secretly in his arms. Together, the two of you laid like that for several moments in a comfortable silence.
Until you broke it with a question that had been on your mind for some time, “Why me?” you asked. 
Loki grinned, “Remember the day we first met?” he paused as you nodded, “You can see beyond what’s in front of you, and that, my lovely, is a rare occurrence in the universe,” Loki cradled you in his arms as you let out a deep breath, “Sleep now. I’ll watch over you. You’re always safe with me.” He placed a feather light kiss on your head.
“I know I am,” you yawned contently, “Loki I…” you fell asleep mid thought.
Loki watched you for some time as he whispered to your sleeping form, “I’ll protect you, darling. No one will ever harm you again, I’ll make sure of it.” 
As Loki watched you sleep, he noticed that the beat of your heart was the exact same rhythm that drew him to earth time and time again. It was like a siren song that called out to him although neither if you were aware of it. Was it soulmates, as your people would call it? Perhaps… but Loki was never one to believe such fables… until now. He smirked to himself before he fell asleep in the last place he expected. But it was right where he belonged. And you were right where you belonged: safely in his arms.
499 notes · View notes
virtu4langel · 25 days ago
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Caught
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Jungwon (Enhypen) x idol! Fem reader
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Summary: Jungwon and Y/N get caught
Genre: Fluff
Warnings: Idols in love
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Y/N and Jungwon weren’t exactly really secretive regarding their relationship dropping hints left and right, the two idols couldn’t help themselves.
The problem wasn’t that Y/N and Jungwon wanted to get caught, They were both professionals after all.
Like that one time when your group was promoting your new comeback on music bank when the MC had asked for your ideal type.
“I like it when someone’s hard working and caring towards others” it had been a safe enough answer, until you decided to add — “Dimples too, I really like dimples”
Your group members shared knowing looks, Jungwon’s smile and dimples had just been trending the day before on twitter and you’d seen the clips of him laughing and smiling during his fansign.
Fans immediately put the two and two together.
Then there were the matching items. It started small your groups performing at the same festival and you both wore the same shade of blue. Harmless right? Except then you posted a selfie wearing a bracelet that looked suspiciously familiar and fans immediately found the Vlive which Jungwon was sharing the exact same one.
Your agency even asked you about it. “It was just a coincidence” you’d say lying through your teeth. But you knew better, Jungwon had given you the bracelet in your three month anniversary.
The secret didn’t stop there
Jungwon was the worst at keeping things lowkey. During a live broadcast with his group a fan asked him to recommend a song and, without missing a beat he mentioned your group’s newest song. “It’s a great song isn’t it?” He’d say with the most innocent expression but his members knew.
And the most recent incident? It was at the end of the year awards show, where both of your groups were a little too close to comfort.
During a commercial break, you’d glance over catching Jungwon’s eye as he winked at you, and gave you a small wave which you returned, thinking no one would bat an eye.
Except someone did.
A clip of you later resurfaced of the two of you sharing loving glances “Why is Y/N smiling like that” “Jungwon waved someone that wasn’t his group member?”
It also didn’t help that Jungwon “accidentally” passed over your table passing you a note on his way to the stage.
In a small napkin there was a small note with his writing
“You look amazing tonight, I’m so proud of you”
By the end of the night the internet was ablaze with theories. Your managers were stressed and your group members teased you endlessly but neither of you seemed to care.
As you scrolled through the chaos that was happening in twitter giggling to your own self you saw a notification pop up.
Jungwon: Do you think they realised yet?
Y/N: Well we were exchanging glances and you passed me a napkin note so..
His reply came almost immediately “totally worth it”
And honestly? You couldn’t agree more.
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perhaps-in-anotherdream · 9 months ago
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[CN] Li Zeyan’s Reliance Date (Eng Translation)
⌚Warning⌚ This post contains detailed spoilers for a date, 依靠之约, that is yet to be released on the global server! ♡
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⚠️ Additional Warning ⚠️ while the entire date is not spice-themed, but the steamy parts are borderline dangerous and highly not recommended if you don’t qualify for the 17+ age rating (CN server). so, the call is yours~ :>
•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•
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【Subbed Video】
youtube
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【Chapter 1】 
MC: [on the call] …We need to find some local media outlets that we can potentially partner with for our ad campaign ASAP.
MC: [on the call]  Also, email me a copy of the revised design proposal for the main exhibit booth.
As soon as I hang up the phone, a flurry of work notifications causes my phone to vibrate again. I roll over on the soft couch and can’t help but heave a sigh.
MC: Sigh…
[MC’s Company Name] has undertaken several major projects this year, and all of them have been executed very successfully. The company’s reputation is also gradually expanding beyond Loveland City.
Last month, our company bid for a large-scale project in collaboration with Copenhagen City Council and Loveland City, and I worked overtime for over a month for this.
However, just as we were about to secure the project smoothly, we were maliciously intercepted by the competing company Shuanjian Media. In the end, it was due to LFG stepping in that we were able to resolve the situation with a narrow escape.
Even though the project has been secured, a lingering sense of defeat from being backstabbed and making critical errors remains with me, refusing to dissipate from my mind.
Perhaps because of this, I’ve recently spent the majority of my time being on top of all kinds of tedious work, afraid that if I don’t handle them in time, it will lead to further consequences.
The sound of steady footsteps gradually draws near, and I turn my head to see Li Zeyan walking towards me. He places a cup of hot Longan tea on the coffee table next to me.
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LZY: This is already the eighth time a certain someone has sighed tonight. What’s so thorny about the project that got you on edge?
I put my phone down and, somewhat coquettishly, open my arms toward the person in front of me.
MC: We’re planning an exhibition for the project in Copenhagen. Just finalized the venue today and now ironing out the details.
He readily responds to my cue and enfolds me in his arms. His fingers trace their way up my neck, massaging the skin there in a soothing manner.
LZY: If I remember correctly, the preparation period for this exhibition is quite long, and there’s no need for your recent overtime to catch up on the schedule.
MC: You’re right, but the coordination needed for various aspects of a multinational project is quite intricate. Starting earlier allows more elbow room…
MC: Plus, the reason I’ve been working overtime isn’t just for this project. The business interview you’re starring in will also be recorded tomorrow.
MC: It’s the final episode of the year, so I cannot afford any slip-ups!
LZY: You’ve already confirmed the program sequence with me three times today. What could possibly go wrong?
While speaking, Li Zeyan sits down next to me and draws me into his arms.
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MC: After all, the external press would absolutely kill to have their names in the show where the CEO Li of LFG is making an appearance. So, I definitely need to be 200% cautious.
Nestled in his embrace, breathing in his familiar scent, I make a conscious effort to relax my somewhat tired brain.
LZY: If you encounter any difficulties, reach out to me at any time.
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MC: I’m facing difficulties right now, and I’m in urgent need of CEO Li’s encouragement!
I pucker my lips and lift my head to approach him. The corners of Li Zeyan’s lips curl up slightly, and he lowers his head–– a soft, warm touch descends before leaving just as quickly.
Though fleeting, the tenderness of the moment washes over my heart. I nuzzle his chin with the tip of my nose, feeling perfectly content.
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LZY: [chuckles indulgently] Dummy, you’re so easily satisfied.
MC: Why wouldn’t I be? What could be more soothing than a kiss from CEO Li?
MC: As for work matters… CEO Li has already helped me a lot, so I’ll work hard and handle the rest on my own!
LZY: We’ll talk about the “working hard” part later. But if you keep dawdling like this, the bathtub is gonna need a refill of hot water.
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MC: Hehe, right now, you should say something like, “Honey, it’s bath time~”
LZY: …
Ignoring the speechless look in his eyes, I lazily shift my position and nuzzle his neck, then stand up with a smile.
MC: Would you like to join me for some relaxation time?
I notice that his fingertips seem to tense up for a moment. Before he can really come and “arrest” me, I make a face at him and dash into the bathroom.
•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•
【Chapter 2】
Soaking in the warm bath, I feel the fatigue in my body dissolving into the water.
Just as I’m about to use my phone to find a drama to watch and completely clear my mind, work messages begin popping up one after another on the screen, and I subconsciously click on them.
MC: [to herself] So, the collaboration partner we agreed on before has backed out…?
As part of our tourism project with Denmark, we are planning to establish recreational and promotional zones in both cities, and we have found an experienced collaborator in the relevant field to partner with.
MC: [to herself] Everything was already talked through and all set, so why are they bringing up issues with the company’s capital chain at this critical juncture?
I feel my insides somewhat burning with rage, so I give Anna a call. She also sounds just as angry and swiftly catches me up to speed on the situation.
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Anna: [on the call] I did some digging, and it turns out one of the shareholders of this company has a very close personal relationship with the owner of Shuangjian Media.
MC: [on the call] Shuangjian Media?
Isn’t that the black-hearted company that tried to sabotage our tourism project?
Anna: [on the call] We initially partnered with them because of their experience in cross-border tourism projects, but now wrangling with them is more cumbersome than it’s worth. I think it might be better to take this opportunity to switch to another company.
MC: [on the call] …let me think about it.
I release a sigh and hang up the phone, then bury my face in the water, blowing bubbles as a mild head throbbing creeps over me.
The perfect company… As I ponder on this matter, a face flashes through my mind.
As a matter of fact, I have casually mentioned this project to Li Zeyan before, but he didn’t show much interest in it.
Should I… go ask him?
Even though I know in my heart–– LFG is the ideal choice that can’t go wrong, for some reason, I can’t seem to bring myself to voice my thoughts.
I can’t always turn to Li Zeyan to help resolve my problems every time I run into one.
No longer in the mood to soak in the warm bath, I reach for the shampoo and press the nozzle, intending to wash up as quickly as possible.
I press down hard twice, but the bottle only emits a sputtering sound, and the last remaining bit of shampoo drips pitifully into my palm.
MC: …
Akin to a sudden spark explosion, it instantly triggers a denotation of all the built-up frustration inside me.
I take a deep breath, jerk myself up from the water and throw on a robe, intending to head for the cabinet to find a new bottle of shampoo.
Little did I know, the moment I step onto the tiled floor, I feel my feet slip out from under me, and my body uncontrollably begins to topple forward––
With a loud thud, the immediate sensation of pain shoots up my knee.
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MC: [in pain] Hiss…
The pain causes my eyes to burn hot, and I slide down onto the bathroom floor, rubbing my knee.
A flurry of somewhat anxious footsteps echoes outside the door. Moments later, the door is flung open, revealing Li Zeyan’s face, tension written across his entire countenance, an expression that is rarely seen on him.
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LZY: [panicked af]  What happened?
The blast of cold air from the open door causes me to shiver. Noticing this, he closes the door before squatting down beside me.
MC: …I slipped and banged my knee.
As he looks at my slightly reddened knee, a hint of helplessness crosses his expression.
LZY: [sighs with infinite indulgent resignation] Restless.
His warm thumb massages the area around my reddened knee, causing the jumble of fretful emotions in my heart to instantly turn into a surge of grievances and pour out.
I blink, trying to dispel the mist clouding my vision. The finger caressing my skin pauses for a moment before suddenly landing at the corner of my eye, catching me unawares.
LZY: [even more indulgently] Crying because it hurts too much?
MC: …no, it’s not that!
MC: It’s nothing serious, just that I got a call from Anna earlier. There’s been… a minor hiccup with the tourism project.
Pouting my lips, I recount to Li Zeyan the “bad news” I’ve just received.
LZY: Do you need my help?
This seems to be the second time he has asked this question. I struggle with myself for a moment before shaking my head.
MC: There’s… no need for now, but if I can’t handle it myself, I’ll definitely reach out to CEO Li.
Hearing me respond this way, Li Zeyan doesn’t press further, and he simply places his palm on the side of my knee.
LZY: Does it still hurt?
Listening to his tender tone, I can’t help but gently hook my finger around his.
MC: It hurts… I can’t get up.
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LZY: [laughs helplessly] When a certain stubborn someone fixates on something, there’s no stopping her, but she’s oddly honest when it comes to being afraid of pain.
MC: I’m just being a little persistent, is all. I can’t always have you be my safety net every time there’s an issue… ouch!
My knee twitches slightly, and a dull ache once again surges through my knee, reminiscent of spreading out along silken threads.
LZY: You can’t solve two things at once, so take them one at a time.
LZY: Do you want to take care of your knee first, or deal with the work matters?
MC: …knee.
The air in the small bathroom with thick with white steam, and even Li Zeyan’s faint sigh seems to blend into the steaming hot vapor.
LZY: [lets out a complex laugh; it’s of sb who is all-knowing of all happenings but is infinitely indulgent towards you]  Then listen to me.
MC: [confused]  What…
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Before I can finish my sentence, Li Zeyan has already shown me through his actions how I should “listen.”
A soft touch imprints on my skin, and a burning sensation spreads from my knee along my skin to my entire body.
I jolt slightly and freeze for a moment. The patch of skin kissed by that softness tingles, and it seems like even the pain is slowly dissipating.
LZY: Don’t fidget; it might make the pain worse.
The deep, slightly hoarse tailing note of his voice, accompanied by the sound of running water, causes me to subconsciously draw my leg back a little, only to have it restrained in place by that hand again.
A gentle sensation, carrying with it a slight chill, seems to pepper its way over my knee, and the painful spot feels as if it’s being licked with cherishment and care.
All the senses in my body seem to be concentrated on that one spot, and I can’t help but take a light breath.
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MC: Li Zeyan… 
LZY: [SO SOF– but you can also hear he’s THERE–]  Hm?
MC: …It’s nothing, I just wanted to say your name…
The fingers supporting my knee tighten slightly, and a surge of scorching breath sweeps over me, swallowing my trailing notes.
I follow his breath and, bit by bit, probe deeper, my heart in my chest pounding in synchronization with his increasingly rising body heat.
Warm water continues to gush from the showerhead, soaking both Li Zeyan’s clothes and mine without distinction.
A body temperature hotter than mine gradually closes in, and I feel as if I’m drowning in this steamy heat swirling in the air.
The lingering colorful bubbles from the shower gel float into the air, then burst open with a pop, leaving behind a soft chime drowned out by the sound of water.
•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•
【Chapter 3】
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Even though I gave up on the bubble bath halfway, ended up having to take a second shower, and by the time I went to bed, it was already the middle of the night, I still woke up early today.
[MC’s Company Name] annual business interview program is scheduled to shoot its final episode today, and Li Zeyan will be appearing as the heavyweight guest in this installment.
I have postponed all my other work and arrived at the studio early to ensure every detail of the shoot is absolutely flawless.
The soft white light from the softbox projects onto the light gray background wall, dimly reflecting the shadows of people hurrying around.
Standing in front of the filming equipment, I direct the production crew to adjust the set.
MC: This table needs to be moved a bit more. It doesn’t look well-positioned at the moment.
MC: Turn the reflector on the front left a little more to the right… there, perfect!
MC: The set is almost ready. I’ll go and check on the guest first.
After saying hello to the supervisor, I head to the dressing room.
Li Zeyan, clad in a suit, sits in front of a vanity mirror, his bangs swept up, causing his somewhat piercing eyes to be enhanced with an even deeper intensity.
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The moment I walk in, those eyes precisely capture me from the reflection in the mirror.
MC: How is the preparation coming along, CEO Li?
LZY: Not bad. Is everything taken care of on the set?
Detecting a hint of jest in his tone, I walk over with a smile.
MC: Yup, that’s why I’m here to check in on this side of things–– CEO Li is our important, esteemed guest after all, so we can’t afford to be negligent.
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MC: Therefore, today, my entire day belongs to you, CEO Li.
I wink at him through the mirror and catch a subtle smile playing at the edge of Li Zeyan’s lips.
I sit down on a stool nearby and watch the makeup artist styling Li Zeyan.
From this angle, his ocular orbit and the bridge of his nose appear even more defined, accentuating the depth of his eyes all the more.
MC: CEO Li’s side profile could outshine many stars on the cover of fashion magazines without competition.
LZY: [laughs in spite of himself] …always laying it on thick.
Even though he says this, the slight arch at the tip of his brows betrays a hint of delight.
Spellbound, as I continue to watch him, my phone suddenly vibrates twice, and a message from Kiki pops up––
Kiki: Boss, great news!!
In the chat window, a push notification jumps into my sight, and a few familiar words grab my attention.
MC: [reading the news] “Shuangjian Media Faces Major Crisis! Multiple celebrities under its banner are implicated in tax evasion scandals, and the investigation is underway. The amount of tax evasion has reached up to…”
Upon seeing the number below, I take in a sharp breath of air.
With such a large amount of tax evasion being investigated, it’s sure to land them in serious trouble.
Although I have caught the wind of some rumors before, suddenly so many people being exposed at once seems more like a deliberate action…
A vague idea surfaces in my mind. I instinctively look towards the man not far away, only to lock eyes with him directly.
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LZY: MC.
I haven’t even noticed when, but his styling is already complete, and the makeup artist has left the dressing room, leaving only the two of us.
The slightly slim-fitted suit highlights his already tall and straight stature, and his slender fingers unhurriedly adjust the cufflinks. He looks in my direction, lifting his head slightly.
LZY: Help me out.
I raise my eyes and see a rose gold collar pin loosely hanging from the collar of his light gray shirt. 
I walk up to him and carefully fasten the collar pin. My fingertips inadvertently graze against the skin of his neck, eliciting a slight quiver of the Adam’s apple beneath the collar.
A somewhat scorching breath caresses my bangs, leaving a tickling sensation.
LZY: [laughs in amusement] Why are you zoning out?
His warm fingertips are on my neck, gently grazing the skin there intermittently.
MC: Just saw some good news that came as a relief for body and mind, that’s why I was a little distracted.
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MC: Shuangjian Media, the company that intercepted [MC’s Company Name] before, has hit a roadblock… I wonder who “played the hero to uphold justice.”
I smile and wink at him, trying to discern any inkling of a clue from his expression that would confirm my guess.
However, he simply lowers his eyes slightly and looks at me, a barely perceptible arc forming on his lips.
LZY: [chuckles softly, but that’s a mastermind chuckle i tell you lmao] That’s quite nice.
MC: Li Zeyan, you…
A knock on the door cuts me off, and the voice of my assistant comes from outside.
Assistant: Boss, CEO Li, it’s almost time for the shoot to begin.
MC: Got it, we’ll be right there.
I purse my lips, suppressing my urge to inquire further, and loosen my hands, intending to escort Li Zeyan to the filming studio.
To my surprise, the pair of arms holding me within show no intention of letting go. He lowers his eyes, his gaze intent upon me.
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LZY: Given the importance of this shoot, there ought to be an additional step in the preparation process.
With his head lowered, Li Zeyan leans in towards me slightly. A gentle and familiar breath assaults my senses, and his soft finger pad presses between my lips and teeth, hinting at something ambiguous. 
I cradle his face and lift myself up on my toes.
Our breaths intertwine for a brief moment, but a gentle ripple is left in my heart, reminiscent of a dragonfly lightly touching the water’s surface.
MC: So, even CEO Li needs a little encouragement before stepping in front of the camera?
LZY: I learned it from a certain someone.
The light in those deep eyes remains locked onto me, shimmering slightly, radiating a glow that seeps into my heart.
LZY: And it’s very effective.
Such scenes are run-of-the-mill for Li Zeyan. His tone remains steady throughout and devoid of any trace of tension.
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LZY: The economic situation this year isn’t conducive to expanding the business scope or making risky investments, but there are more opportunities in the lower-tier markets compared to previous years…
As I watch Li Zeyan through the camera lens, the soft light, which leans more on the cooler tone, accentuates the depths of the man’s countenance all the more.
He speaks at a measured pace, but each word is uttered with an inexplicable sense of certainty.
Host: Although CEO Li mentioned just now that this year isn’t favorable for expanding business extern, LFG seems to be steadily venturing into new fields this year.
LZY: As a matter of fact, LFG has not been as stable this year as it may seem from the outside. On the contrary, we’ve encountered more crises than in previous years.
LZY: The failure of some investments has even put us under the preying eyes of many industry peers.
LZY: But fortunately, I’m not alone in holding up LFG, and LFG is not an isolated island––
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As he speaks, his gaze seems to subtly shift towards me behind the camera. In that brief second our eyes interlock, the corners of his lips curl upward into a small smile.
But when I focus and take a closer look again, it’s as if that fleeting smile was never there.
LZY: LFG was able to weather this year’s storms without any mishaps not only due to our decisions but also thanks to the countless colleagues who worked tirelessly day and night to recover the company’s losses, as well as to the support of our subsidiaries.
LZY: Especially the companies that LFG has invested in. Without them, LFG would’ve encountered even greater challenges this year.
Li Zeyan’s straight-from-the-shoulder remarks leave even the host a little taken aback, an expression of surprise settling on their face.
Host: It appears that even LFG, regarded as the lion king in the eyes of the others, has times when it rides the waves to advance.
LZY: That’s inevitable; no one walks a solitary path in this society.
LZY: Having your own plans and making decisive choices is important, but choosing the right people to move forward with is equally important.
I am slightly taken aback.
This was not in the script; it’s obviously an impromptu remark from Li Zeyan.
I’m not sure why, but these words suddenly make me think of those eyes gazing into mine in the bathroom last night.
The unnecessary persistences in my heart seem to quietly start to disintegrate. I tightly clench my fingers and pull my attention back to the show.
Host: We can tell that CEO Li is speaking from the heart. It seems that not only for the company but also for you, CEO Li, personally, do you have someone who can be considered as your exclusive “valued person”?
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This time, I clearly see the smile in his eyes. I hold my breath slightly, waiting for the answer that I may have already known for a long time, yet can’t help eagerly anticipating––
LZY: [while looking at you] I do. It’s a well-spring that will never run dry, even in the desert. No matter what trouble may arise, I know without a doubt––
LZY: [while looking at you] She will be by my side forever.
•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•
【Chapter 4】
After the interview concludes, the filming crew and I head to the Central Grand Hotel.
To celebrate the completion of year-end work and the official wrap-up of the show, [MC’s Company Name] is holding a team-building celebration party here.
Perhaps because the end of the year is drawing closer, a festive atmosphere gradually begins to permeate, filling the banquet hall with laughter.
Being spurred on by this pure joy, I also end up having a few extra drinks.
I find myself feeling a little woozy, until, finally, Li Zeyan takes the wine glass from my hand and escorts me all the way to the lounge of the suite.
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Inside the room’s bathroom, I turn on the faucet–– the cool water flows over my hand, washing away the slight tipsiness from the alcohol.
After the buzz from the alcohol has worn off a bit, I exhale and push open the bathroom door.
The lights in the room are not lit, and a familiar voice can be heard drifting from near the window. He seems to be on the phone with someone.
LZY: …got it. Email it to me.
The high heels under my feet tread on the soft carpet, barely producing any sound as I walk quietly to the floor-to-ceiling windows––
Outside the glass windows of the high-rise, thousands of lights spread out into the distance like a dazzling mosaic of stars.
Li Zeyan is lying on the carpet, the neon lights falling upon him in soft, colorful specks.
I sit down by the freestanding panoramic bathtub not far from him, watching as he hangs up the call.
MC: Was that about work?
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LZY: Mm. I heard [MC’s Company Name] is looking for new partners for the Denmark project. I’ve asked the marketing department to draft a proposal. Once it’s finalized, I’ll send it over to you.
MC: But… weren’t you not very interested in this project before?
LZY: It’s true that the profit margins of this project are finite for LFG. However, if we approach it strategically, it could be a breakthrough in the Nordic market.
Seeing my somewhat baffled expression, he raises an eyebrow.
LZY: Since a certain someone has been dragging her feet, I have no choice but to take the initiative and propose it myself.
LZY: Or perhaps you already have other choices in mind?
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MC: Of course not!
I don’t shy away from meeting those deep eyes of his squarely. My heart skips a beat, and I’m reminded of the question I’ve been holding back all afternoon.
MC: Before I give you my formal answer, I also have something I’d like to ask CEO Li––
MC: Shuangjian Media artists were found to have engaged in tax evasion. Helping [MC’s Company Name] vent some frustration this way… that was CEO Li’s doing, wasn’t it?
LZY: After all, a certain someone has been frowning and being glued to her phone even during meals for the past two weeks because of the troubles this company has stirred.
LZY: It’s best to take care of it early on, so it doesn’t take up more of your energy.
I’m momentarily stunned, and as I reflect on the recent events, a surge of emotions suddenly intertwines in my heart.
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MC: So, CEO Li, what you are subtly reminding me is that I’ve been too occupied with work recently and have been neglecting you?
LZY: [you can’t hear me, but I’m screaming––]  I simply want to have the share that’s rightfully mine.
His understated words convey a hint of tenderness that’s impossible to miss, and it sears into my heart, making the swaying toes of my feet pause mid-motion.
MC: Li Zeyan, thank you. Even though it may sound very formal, I still want to say thank you.
LZY: I wonder who was the person that said before that, you and I, we are one identity?
I’m slightly taken aback for a moment–– I did seem to have said those words not too long ago.
At the time, FengZhen Group was making moves against LFG, and I couldn’t be more grateful to be the one who could stand by his side.
[Tidbits]: It’s a call-back to Li Zeyan’s 2024 CNY UR: Burning Imprints~
MC: [teasingly]  I believe I said “and LFG” at the time.
LZY: [confidently shrugs off LOL] Same thing.
LZY: Both LFG and I are enmeshed in many complicated relationships, and more and more branches and leaves are slowly growing outward.
LZY: So there’s no need to be so anxious. You’ve long been the sharpest blade capable of breaking the siege for LFG.
The lingering haze that has been weighing on my mind for the past half a month suddenly clears up. In its place, there arises a kind of sweet and surging fluttering sensation, and it’s overwhelming enough to fill my entire heart.
I did seem to be a little too anxious, so anxious that I overlooked the fact that I didn’t need to be in a hurry to rush forward. The unshakable position by his side will always belong to me and me alone.
I lower my eyes, my gaze tracing the contours of his outline obscured by the darkness.
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MC: Li Zeyan… you will forever be my first choice.
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As the words leave my lips, my ankle is suddenly clasped by a warm, dry palm.
Followed by a sigh that almost blends into the night, a twinge of pain shoots through my calf––
My eyes widen, watching as Li Zeyan’s lips meet my skin and nip me gently. He raises his eyes to interlock with mine, and I can see a hint of dissatisfaction swimming in their depths.
LZY: [GOSH THAT SULKY YET SEXY TONE] You’ve hesitated for too long.
Warm fingertips trace upward along my calf little by little, as if offering a kind of appeasement.
The worries haunting me every now and again, concealed in the darkest recesses of my heart, are set alight and burned to ashes.
MC: …I didn’t take that long.
LZY: Since I am your first choice, don’t hesitate.
His fiery breath snakes slowly up the inside of my knee, accompanied by comforting words tinged with a layer of inexplicable rosy hue, causing one to become addicted.
The soft touch rests gently agains the bend of my knee, causing me to shiver involuntarily. I chuckle softly and look at him with a semi-playful gaze.
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MC: Um… Mr. “First Choice,” could you help me with something––
MC: Tell me, what can I do to make you happier?
Not waiting for me to finish my sentence, the pressure on my thigh increases slightly, and suddenly my body feels lighter.
The cry of exclamation hasn’t even left me before I find my entire person already wrapped in strong, solid arms.
LZY: You knowingly ask the question.
His deep eyes are so close to me, almost within reach. I can clearly see countless sparks surging beneath them, stirring up an ambiguous and inexplicable heat.
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LZY: [chuckles softly] Also, while I said I would help you, it doesn’t mean you won’t have to pay the price.
LZY: After all, I don’t do business at a loss.
LZY: You still have time to think about… what you can give to pay me.
My heart is filled to the brim. I wrap my arms around his shoulders, bury my face in the crook of his neck, and release a sigh of contentment.
The throbbing and undulations of his chest pound against my body again and again, and even the depths of my very soul seem to be trembling along with the motion––
Filling up my entire being.
──────────────────────────────────────────
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croucify · 10 months ago
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✶ STARGIRL — hamzahthefantastic x reader
003 ✶ In Too Deep
stargirl masterfile – next – previous
SUMMARY: hamzah has a crush on a youtuber who's always out and about and slushies see their relationship progress on social media! (smau)
DISCLAIMER: reader is a brown haired girl and for some pics that aren't faceless, i'll be using olivia rodrigo cause i love her and she’s filipino like me hehehe
A/N: i added twitter in this au and if u guys have app recommendations for the fake texting stuff pls let me know!!
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liked by slushyfan, aisharae, and others
ynln late night froyo (ps get urself a guy who would download ur fav album for u and put it in a cd)
view comments
user627 i thought of the sinjin song HELP
user109 is that hamzah...
user234 THE SOFT LAUNCH?!!?!
wes10 steven colbert
↳ ynln late night frozen yogurt
user935 that is literally hamzah omfg 😭😭😭
hamzahthefantastic Re eh eh ed
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liked by croucify, iloveyn, and others
ynlnupdates Y/N with Hamzah and Fans today!!! ❤️
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user378 HOLY SHITTTT
user102 MY PEOPLE WTF
user446 does this make it official
user529 they look so gooddd
user817 OH MY GOD THATS ME!!!!
↳ user623 HOW WERE THEY
↳ user817 SOOOO NICE!!! and hamzah had his arm around her shoulders after we left 🥹
ynln posted on their story !
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INSTAGRAM STORY WAS DELETED.
scarlet @iloveyn
DID U GUYS SEE YN'S STORY OH NY GOOODDDD
50 replies 35 retweets 103 likes
user555 I DID WHAT THE HELL
user018 she has to be talking about hamzah right
↳ user126 what did she post i didnt see :((
↳ iloveyn HERE she deleted this 3 minutes after thank god i had notifs on
↳ user126 OH MY GOD...
user927 did she think she was posting it on her burner LMAOOOOO
✶ taglist — @cdbabymp3 @noturbabe22 @dabuggh3 @kingvioleta @tumb1rgir1z LMK IF U WANNA BE ADDEDDD!!!
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targaryenrealnessdarling · 2 years ago
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No Pain, No Gain | Part 1 | PersonalTrainer!Aemond x fem!reader
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Summary: The personal trainer your roommate Baela recommended to you is rude, condescending but also hot as hell. Series Masterlist.
A/N: shoutout to my personal trainer Alex for rotting my brain. This is my first modern!Aemond fic, so any feedback is genuinely appreciated, I hope you enjoy this, it was an absolute ball to write (and there will be more!)
Also I could not post this without tagging some absolute modern!Aemond QUEENS who inspired me to write this. @valeskafics @oneeyedvisenya @sapphire-writes​ you’re the real ones! Also massive hug to @ewanmitchellcrumbs​ for hyping me up and being a parent to this child she didn't choose to create.
warnings: EVENTUAL SMUT, 18+, sexual tension, binge eating, mentions of breakup, cursing, dickhead Aemond, reader is horny af, English slang (soz), warnings will be added when needed
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To say you were broken-hearted would be a bit of an understatement.
You were angry, annoyed, frustrated, wound up tight and pissed off to the highest degree.
And it showed in how you acted these days as you polished off the salty family-size bag of crisps on your own in 10 minutes flat.
You look over at your phone and sigh when you see it’s already 6 o’clock in the afternoon. Another day sat on the sofa, wallowing in self-pity, eating yourself into oblivion and fairly soon pouring a glass of Baela’s finest white wine (now that it was officially almost evening anyway and it was justified).
Scrolling through instagram was like twisting the dagger that was already in your chest. All that stupid fucking app could show you was ‘ex in the bar with his new girlfriend’, ‘ex in the drive-thru with his new girlfriend’, ‘ex on the beach with his new girlfriend’.
It made you want to throw your phone directly at the wall. But you settled for squeezing the life out of it, imagining it was your ex’s stupid face instead.
The absolute waste of space had broken up with you over text on the night you were supposed to go out on a date. And as if that was not bad enough, not even two weeks had gone by before he’d managed to stick his dick into someone else with a pulse. At the time, you were so angry that you didn’t accuse him of anything, he’d already broken up with you. But you did suspect that this ‘sudden’ relationship he’d gotten into wasn’t as recent as first thought. 
It’s been a month since you found out about the other woman.
And clearly you were coping really well.
Indulging wasn’t something you usually did, but now you feel you deserved it. 
“Hello~” the soft, ringing voice of your roommate Baela was at the door. You half-considered hiding all the packets of various foods you’d managed to stuff down your gob, but Baela had seen worse of you. She’d seen you while you were throwing your guts up after freshers week at university. Nothing was worse than that and you shuddered at the memory.
She walks in, looking more put together than you by a long way, having been hanging out with her sister all day. That’s what you like about Baela, she’s not judgemental, and so when she sees you’ve barely moved an inch she just flashes her usual smile.
“Good day then?” she says with a smirk. You raise your eyebrows in return.
“Apart from seeing him plastered all over instagram I’m great” 
“Got any left?” she asks, extending a greedy hand for a crisp. You offer her the bag with a sigh as she slumps on the sofa next to you. She watches boredly whatever you have on the TV,
"Why don't you just block him?" She asks. And to be fair, she has a point.
But you huff and shove another crisp in your mouth, whining, "Cos I'm a nosy bitch with no boundaries"
Baela sighs, pulling out her own phone and scrolling through her notifications, "As much as I love you y/n, this is pathetic, even for you"
You'd be offended if she wasn't completely right. And you know she's only half joking so you just shrug.
"How was Rhaena?" You ask.
"Yeah fine, usual shit with Dad. Oh I didn't tell you-" she starts.
She has that glint in her eye which spells trouble. She's got gossip and you raise your eyebrows in anticipation.
"Hold that thought, wine first?"
"Obviously"
After giggling and waltzing over to the counter to pour two glasses of the finest box wine you could get for under seven English pounds, you hand her one and wait almost too excitedly for her to spill whatever sweet gossip she has.
She sips it, almost like she needs the liquid courage to begin, and she hisses at the sweet, acidic taste.
"God that's foul" 
"It was 2 for 1!" You retort with a laugh, but she is right, it does taste foul, "Stop stalling, tell me tell me tell me" 
She looks at you as if to say bitch, you are not fucking ready.
“Dad’s married Rhaenyra” 
The force of which your jaw drops open is almost comical. You’d guessed for a while that they were at least fucking, but to just elope?!
“I need money, cos I betted on this shit happening!” 
“Oh my gosh, Rhaena was fucking hysterical. Jace and Luke aren’t surprised at all, but Alicent is beside herself in the family group chat, it should honestly be a reality TV show” Baela says scrolling through said group chat. From what you can see without being too nosy, is that there’s a lot of long paragraphs and angry emojis.
“What about Viserys, surely he’s…” you ask, trailing off to sip the pissy wine in your hands.
“Oh no, he’s thrilled. Which pisses Alicent off even more if that’s possible”
“Baela I think your Uncle’s gone insane” you bite your lip to stifle a laugh.
“No fucking kidding”
You slump back onto the sofa, “Holy shit, I am a genius. I knew the whole time” you say, smirking in victory.
“And so humble too” Baela gives a sarcastic grin which you return.
“How do you feel about it?”
Baela shucks her phone onto the coffee table, sighing, “Not bothered, we’re all adults now, so it hardly makes a difference to me. Suppose it’ll get Dad to stop bringing back random women now” she says exasperated, “but Rhaenyra gets the impression we’re all really bothered so she’s invited us all to a retreat for a week. Think she just wants to butter us up for marrying our Dad”
“Oh? Anywhere nice?”
Baela looks over, giving you a wearied look.
“What?”
“Well that brings me to you”
“Oh god, what” you ask, dropping the tone to emphasise the seriousness of the talk all of a sudden.
Baela fiddles with the remote, in an attempt to appear cute, “Well~ There’s a spare ticket going and you’re my bestest friend. And I would hate to endure a week of watching my Dad eat Rhaenyra’s face off, so come with me please?” she begs.
You sigh, “Baela usually I would love to sponge off you like that but-”
“Pleasepleaseplease~” she begs, “Rhaena’s bringing her boyfriend and we’re basically together!” 
You fake a gagging sound.
“Oh come on, a week on a beach in bikinis,sweltering weather with as many cocktails as you can hold isn’t exactly torture”
You give her an incredulous look, opening your arms to emphasise all the bags of junk food around you, “Do I look beach body ready to you?!”
“Oh fuck off, you’re hot and have an ass that can keep the world fed” 
“I know I am hot, I just don’t feel hot” you stare blankly at the TV, trying to ignore her and stuff another crisp into your mouth.
Baela sighs, “I was just thinking it would be a nice distraction, that’s all” 
“I want to it’s just…” you start, trying to think of the right words, “...I don’t feel my best”
Baela gives you a playful slap on your arm, “Look, forget your ex, he’s dumb as fuck and it’s not solving anything by staying inside with the curtains drawn all day. If you want to feel better, might be worth taking care of yourself a bit, hm?” 
Fuck her, you think, rolling your eyes, she’s right.
You hate how often she’s right. Because she gets that look on her face when she is. Always has done.
“How about that gym membership you’ve not used since February?” she asks,
“Okay firstly, ouch. Secondly, I realised I don’t know the first thing about how to work out in a gym, besides the guys there were…weird”
You shudder at the thought. It was January and so all the new year’s resolution guys were at it in full swing, using the gym as a means to try and pick up girls. And since graduating you find that more often than not the guys who hit on you were students. Maybe it was different now?
Baela pokes her cheek with her tongue, racking her brain.
“One of my cousins is a personal trainer? I could text him to see if he’s happy to take you on. Mates rates” she smiles.
You side-eye her hard. You’ve heard briefly about her cousins. Some of the stories are a bit more…eccentric than others. And even though you’ve never met them, you’ve heard enough stories to satisfy your curiosity. 
“This isn’t the manwhore cousin, right? Because if it is then no” 
She scoffs, “No. Aegon hasn’t set food in a gym since graduating and he only went cos it was free. The personal trainer one is Aemond. He’s a bit…anti-social?” she pulls a face when she says it.
“He’s anti-social and he’s a personal trainer?” you ask, eyebrow raised, “makes so much sense”
Baela scrolls through her contacts, “Yeahhh. Don’t worry though, he’s just grumpy” she explains, “want me to text him?”
Your head falls to the edge of the sofa in a huff. You want to go and on top of that, it might be nice to finally have a break. That and you’d love to shove it in your exes face when he sees you’re on holiday looking your hottest. 
“How long ‘til the holiday?”
Baela grins victoriously, “A month and a bit. He does a month course for stuff like this, I can ask him about it”
What the fuck am I getting myself into, you think briefly.
Fuck it.
“Fine”
The force at which Baela’s nails tap against the screen is almost desperate.
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Baela snorts a laugh at the message and turns her phone to show you the messages.
“He seems lovely” you roll your eyes sarcastically.
“Like I said, he’s just grumpy. He’ll be professional though” she says.
You sigh, crushing the empty bag of crisps in your hands.
“Can’t wait” 
After following him on instagram, you did a bit of shameless stalking. You’d heard a little bit about Aemond from Baela talking about her family, but he seemed the most mysterious out of all of them (save for the youngest whose name she struggled to even remember). 
He had very little photos of himself, mainly progress pictures of other clients he’s helped. And he seems to be pretty successful so far. A girl with a similar body to you managed to get toned on his one-month program and looked hot afterwards, so you had some high hopes that it was possible for you as well. But you did wonder what he looked like. There were only two photos where he was in frame, and he’d been tagged by another person, looking away from the camera.
From what you could see, he was very tall, lithe and slim but built, with silver hair that had been pulled up into a bun. Ah, so he’s a man-bun type of guy. Yikes. 
Unfortunately, the photo showed very little of his face, so you couldn’t be too nosy.
You sent a very brief message, introducing yourself, trying not to cringe at the idea that he might be doing the exact same stalking to your instagram right at this moment. A shiver went up your spine at the thought. 
It’s only when you’re in TKMaxx with Baela, shopping for gym gear the next day, that you finally get a reply from him. 
“What do you think of just wearing a sports bra?” Baela says, eyeing up a black shirt.
You’re too busy staring at the message, “Hm? Oh, I’d just go in gym leggings and a bra yeah. Just got a reply from your mysterious cousin”
Baela hops over, “What’s he said? Nothing bad I hope” she grins.
 You show her the screen.
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Baela raises her eyebrows, “Very formal. Guess I shouldn’t be surprised” she says, seeming surprised that he’s at least cordial.
“It’s very ‘serial-killer-esque’ of him not to have a profile picture” you joke, locking your phone again.
Baela picks out a black gym set. Black leggings with a mesh pocket on the side for your phone and a black sports bra. You nod, “Yeah looks good to me”
“Oh please you’re gonna look hot in this” she smirks, leading you over to the counter to pay.
She rewards you for your efforts by driving you to McDonald's drive-thru. A send off to junk-food so to speak.
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And when Monday rolls around, you nod in the mirror. She was right, it does look hot on you. At least in the safety of your flat where there’s nobody to look at you. In a gym, surrounded by other fit people and a personal trainer you’ve never met? It might feel slightly different.
There’s a faint swirl of anxiety in your gut but you pull your trainers on, grab a hair tie from your nightstand and drive to the gym you’ve agreed to meet at. Luckily it’s your local gym, large and packed to the brim with some good equipment at least. And you briefly wonder what kind of workouts you’ll be doing before pulling into the car park.
You see him as soon as you enter the gym. He’s very tall, slender but muscular and fucking gorgeous. What the fuck, is all you can think when you shamelessly scan him from head to toe. Like the pictures, he has his long silver hair in a bun, with a few pieces having come free and falling around his face. His legs are miles long in the black sweats he’s wearing, as well as the black top that sticks a bit too snugly to his front and shoulders, making your mouth water a bit.
And you can’t help but admire his side profile, how his jaw just so naturally and sharply juts into his chin. How his cheekbones sit so prominently and high on his face, framing his features. His sharp, defined nose. And you can’t see from here because he’s looking down at his phone, but his eyelashes are unnaturally long for a man. It’s just unfair, frankly.
Shaking yourself briefly from the trance you were in, you right yourself and approach him.
He looks up to see you before you even have a chance to open your mouth. Now that he's looking at you face on, you can see the shocking blue of his right eye and the paler, soft hue of the other. Not only that but the angry scar that ran down the side of his face, extending from his forehead to the mid part of his cheek, straight through the eye.
You look at it for a split second, surmising that perhaps he's partially sighted or blind in that eye. But you choose not to say anything and instead smile with an awkward wave.
"Hey, you must be Aemond"
He openly drags his eyes over you, from head to toe, just like you did a moment ago without his knowledge. But now that you're standing right in front of him, in the gym gear that you totally don't feel a bit self conscious in, it feels a bit weird.
He doesn't reply for a moment.
"I'm y/n" you say, forcing a smile to your nervous face.
"Hm" he responds lowly, "Baela's friend" 
You pull an awkward face and nod.
You feel so stupidly small against this absolute giraffe of a man and you daren't step forward any more, for fear of looking even smaller under his judgemental and indifferent gaze.
He sighs and gestures for you to follow him, seeming disinterested as he looks down at his phone. For a brief second you wonder how this guy keeps his clients if he's this rude, but you shake the thought away, not wanting to judge too quickly.
He leads you into one of the consultation rooms, separate from the rest of the gym. He sits on one of the seats, sighing as if he's had the hardest day in the world and taking a swig of water from his bottle.
Sat across from him, you feel a bit small under his gaze. He's quite intimidating, you now find.
"Have you ever worked out before" he asks flatly.
You shrug, "I've tried I guess, but never super seriously" you laugh awkwardly, but he doesn't return it.
He runs his eyes over you again, as if to say yeah I can see that.
"Stand up. Shoes off. We're going to take your weight and measurements" he orders, going to his bag to grab some things.
It's beyond awkward and quiet in the room with him as he idly takes down your weight, height and current eating habits, which you've had to be more honest about than you'd cared to admit.
Standing in the middle of the room, he twirls his measuring tape on his fingers. He measures your upper body first, which isn't too bad until he gets to your bust. You try and look anywhere else in the room while he measures across it, his fingers landing softly at either arm, taking a note of the measurement. You internally scold yourself, he is so much taller and surely must be able to see right down the sports bra. It only serves to make your face heat up with embarrassment.
If that wasn't enough, he gets to your lower body, measuring your hips and then thighs. He gets to his knees to do it and you resist the urge to pull your hands into fists at the proximity of him to your intimate area, separated only by a thin pair of gym leggings and underwear.
He doesn't seem to bother himself with the awkwardness. And every time you look at his face, he seems indifferent, bored even. Even then, his face is unnaturally beautiful, even with the scar.
He must really not like people.
Aemond sighs having taken all his notes.
"We'll do one training session and see how much weight we can do" he instructs. You nod.
"I expect you to be in the gym four times a week, three in the week and once at the weekend. We'll do one session together a week so I can check your progress" 
His tone is so flat, all you can do is nod. He looks at you,
"Got it?" 
Your cheeks heat up, "Um, yeah"
"Good"
He leads you outside to the actual gym floor which luckily isn't too busy, side-eyeing you massively when you pull your hair up into a ponytail to get it off your neck.
His large form leads you over to where the mats are kept, haphazardly throwing two to the floor.
He doesn't say anything past one or two word commands and it's incredibly difficult to not look in the mirror in front of you to watch him as he stretches. The way he stretches his arms over his head and it lifts the hem of his shirt a little, showing his happy trail, biceps rippling.
And when he does leg stretches, instructing you to do the same, you can't help but stare at how his thighs are basically bulging out from his sweats. It takes all of your strength and will to not look any higher than that towards his hips.
He watches your form as you try and copy him stretching. And your heart almost leaps into your chest when he uses his hand to move your ankle slightly, so that you put pressure on a certain muscle. But he focuses completely, professional.
Fuck, be professional.
All caution is thrown completely to the wind when he gets you on machines. He demonstrates some of them first, starting with the so-called 'easier' ones, like the inner and outer thigh machines that look way too…suggestive.
Of course, he's got it on a ridiculous weight to demonstrate which makes you scoff a bit. And when you get on the inner thigh machine, it locks into place with your legs spread. You thank every god there is that there's no mirror in front of you on this machine.
"You have to start with your legs spread as much as possible" he states simply, pushing the pads against your legs even further. It makes your eyes widen, sinful thoughts pop up in your head. But before they take root you shake them away.
It's ridiculously hard the first few times and he raises an eyebrow.
"Really?" He mocks a bit, the tiniest of smirks on his face "you're only on 14kg" 
"Fuck off" you mutter under your breath. He tuts and changes it to 9kg, bruising your ego a bit. But you finish the set nonetheless.
You think he's a bit of a psycho, because after that little remark he has you on every leg machine available. Making fun every time you have to be on the lowest weight.
After the session, you're aching in places you didn't even know existed and you haven't even rested yet. Knowing full well you'll be achy as fuck tomorrow and even wlrse than right now. The faintest sheen of sweet is visible on your pinkened chest.
"You're weaker than I thought" 
He runs his long fingers through his hair and you want to slap that stupid fucking self-indulgent look off his smug face seeing you all out of puff like this.
"Thanks, means a lot" you say sarcastically, drinking from a water bottle. He raises an eyebrow at the attitude.
"I'll send you your workout plan. If you have any issues do me a favour and don't bother me with them" he retorts.
"Charming" you mutter under your breath once he's gone past you. You watch as he walks away, briefly appreciating his broad shoulders, until the sour taste of his poor behaviour settles in. And you huff, texting Baela immediately.
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You curse every god there is that you drive a manual car, because right now the thought of having your aching leg pressing on the clutch pedal might actually drive you to mass-murder.
This is going to be a long month.
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Taglist: @mrsgrwy @lovelykhaleesiii
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