#i wondered how he would react to the realization that he misses vash | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

iwritenarrativesandstuff · 1 year ago

Text

Trimax Thoughts Vol. 11 Pt. 1

Well, we're back after last week's suffering. Stream of consciousness ahead!

First off I find this a clever way to hide the hair! Dynamic posing! The poor unsuspecting fools who haven't read volume 10 would look at this and have no idea why we're sad.

Live Zazie reaction:

Augh, Livio driving the car... Vash asleep in the back... this does something to me.

He's so cute. He's not suffering or anything look at him.

Both Brad and Livio reaming him out for being too trusting that's so funny to me

To be quite honest, I feel like Livio was very much a victim in all this... that doesn't make him blameless in the situation but it was very much Chapel who grievously injured Wolfwood enough that he chose to take the double vials, and it was him who manipulated Razlo to be dependent on him and Livio to think serving was his only purpose. That said, there's something very heartwarming about Brad being so upset over Wolfwood's death considering his usual untrusting nature and the fact that he really didn't know him that well.

Livio apologizes for his body stopping the bleeding so soon after getting punched. Buddy. No. 😂😭

I feel so bad for the Plants in all this. However, much as it sucks for humanity, I'm very glad to know they can exert enough influence in order to resist killing their sisters and brother and are able to express their free will in some way... could they have refused commands before this point then? If so, that begs the question of why they didn't.

Someone arriving from space???

Oh, so the Plants feel an affinity with Knives. Is that because they agree with him and his methods? Is it because he's absorbed so many of their sisters already? Do they feel his pain and loneliness? I'm so curious.

Meryl!!! I missed yoouuuuu (and she immediately sticks out her tongue and flips a double bird at authority. love her.)

I love this... such a sweet and quiet moment with these two amidst the chaos. Milly putting her perceptiveness to good use to try and support Meryl as best she can. It makes me wonder about that 7-8 month gap and how these two survived not just what is basically the apocalypse, but also the struggle of Meryl's trauma from having Vash's memories dumped on her. I bet Milly was pretty instrumental during that period.

"It's too bad it will never be the same again." IN COMES VASH THE STAMPEDE SWINGING IN ON A LADDER

AUGHHHHHHH. This is so sweet aaaaaaa. Oh my god I just realized this is the first time they've actually seen each other since that town chased Vash out and Meryl had a breakdown. Where he thought she was scared of him. But she wasn't!!! He started to realize it after Marlon, but now he sees it!!! They are. so precious to me... :')

The Earth fleet is close!!! ...that's kind of bad actually.

Luida: "What happened to your hair?" Vash, very loudly: "ANYWAYS TIME FOR THE LAST STAND HUH?"

Oh Milly... I'm intrigued by the way she just plays along with it... she really is a lot like Vash. I wonder why Brad even did that though. I kind of feel like it was to keep people from acting aggressively towards Livio, as saying he died would lead to questions that would probably reveal Livio was at the center of it. Not for Livio's sake of course (I don't think Brad really cares about him) but Vash trusts him, Wolfwood sacrificed himself for him, and they really can't afford infighting at this point. ...never mind that Milly wouldn't have reacted that way anyways.

Ok lol I'd just been thinking "what happened to Zazie's arm and then..

hdjfhbvdjfvh

Oh, the coins are back. Interesting. Legato faceoff soon?

The hurt is palpable with poor Livio here...

Oh! I was right about Brad's reasoning! Cool! Also I think that's the friendliest we've ever seen Brad-

HJDHBJDHCBS???

BRANDON I'VE SAID IT BEFORE BUT EVERY INTERACTION YOU RISE FURTHER UP MY LIST OF FAVOURITE SIDE CHARACTERS

"Ya need to learn to let people help ya out" <-YES.

And of course Vash deflecting by playing up and overdramatizing what is probably a genuine reaction... I really think he knows this already but he's walled himself off so long. He appreciates everyone, he really does, but... them getting hurt is always going to be far worse than them being disappointed in him or himself getting hurt. It's not just because he cares about them... it's also just as much because he cares very little for himself. I also think he just... can't, right now. "Don't tell me something like that now" <- yeah because he's a gaping wound at this point. All he's done is put a stopper on his fresh grief, and he cannot afford to open it else he'll probably shatter and he can't right now.

??? Did Legato just kill Zazie? (Or I guess Zazie's body...) Also, he can walk again??? Huh???

Wow Zazie just took out Elendira and Knives... that's impressive actually.

AND THEY HAD A WORM IN THEIR VAGINA???

Oof, I don't actually want that to happen to Knives... that's pretty horrifying.

Ok. Ok Legato. I will readily admit you are one of the coolest people in this manga. That's incredibly badass. The amount of mental coordination he'd need to puppet himself around is incredible. And the reveal that he is literally puppeteering is fascinating. GIVE ME THE FORBIDDEN LEGATO LORE

So Vash is... making bullets with his powers? Ok... interesting. Wonder what they do? ...also he's using more of his powers. Hm. :/

Whjdfhsdfhb Livio jumpscare

Look at my dorky little guy

I'm so happy for him and his new haircut/outlook. (I bet Vash would know a little something about that huh? *cough cough* Eriks)

??????????? Hi Zazie. This was random...?

Oh, so this is Chronica! She's introduced pretty late in the manga. She's also an Independent it seems! And much more knowledgeable than either Vash or Knives. There's an entire generation of Independents from Earth! They have implanted neural blockers to prevent fusing??? Implications that fusing like what Knives is doing has happened before??? Hello??? Need to chew on this.

Vash WHAT are you doing freaking out like that hdfjhbsdfvh. Livio trying to calm him down like :|

Hjhsbjdfhbvs now they're all screaming at the bug... which. which is drawn like this.

...I wonder if Nightow-sensei was also upset by volume 10 and the rampant comedy right now is him coping...

Hjhdbfjhbfv they're so stupid

"...i'm gonna touch it" energy. HHDBSHCBHJBEJ VASH NO

...you know I do think there is something to be said about Vash acting like the irresponsible and foolish brother to... Wolfwood's brother. There's just. Yeah.

I love them both so much they are so stupid

Vash calling Elendira a bitch is so funny to me, especially because before the Ark he didn't seem to really know her at all. How much do you want to bet she dropped by just to annoy and vaguely threaten Vash and Legato while they were locked in that 7 month stalemate. Vash hears her walking into the room and is just like "GDI NOT AGAIN LEAVE ME ALONE".

Livio beloved... finally he's found purpose for himself... (please be careful against Elendira... I love you.......)

"Sometimes it's not easy to explain the power of someone's presence. Especially when it's someone so greatly and deeply connected to you. Some people can't even say it. But this helped Vash the Stampede realize... that he was feeling the same thing in his heart." <-he continues to haunt the narrative... but gosh what a thing to communicate to the reader here. what a thing, to realize how much you cared too late... but what a thing, also, to realize you had at all :') they both miss him so much… but he’s also their resolve

FINALLY we get to know how the Plants feel about all this!!! I feels so bad for them man. I feel they're similar to Vash in that they don't want anyone hurt really... but they're not able to fight their own fight. Pretty heartbreaking stuff.

Meryl... :'(

YES MILLY. CALL HIM OUT! Meryl is worried. Let her be worried.

AUGHHHHHHHHHHHH THIS IS SO CUTE!!! He's going to come back it means he's going to come back it means don't worry I'll find you again I'll come and find you this time I ahsjdcbhasjdvhbsjfhbv Vash you can be so sweet when you are not actively avoiding any and all emotional situations with people who care about you!!!

Chronica's going to turn off her limiter :O

Elendira: Hi :) *stabs you*

"I don't like nice men. They die so easily. He was like that too." <- Oh you did not just go there.

Elendira I think just has no faith in people. She looks actually a bit upset when she says "they die so easily" about "nice men". Then there's the "no matter what Vash the Stampede does, there will always be humans who ruin it." She's decided that while she wants Knives to succeed... if he doesn't, she'll just end the world regardless. Hm. Elendira you are so interesting to me.

Ohh... protecting the kids... Livio... :')

It's JASMINE???

YES! Livio has found his resolve! The cloak from Jasmine, the hat from the little kid! You can do it buddy!

#storyrambles #trigun #trimax #trigunbookclub

15 notes · View notes

plantfell · 2 years ago

Text

Just when Knives thinks he's free of the damnable Mist's tricks, he finds himself enshrouded by them once more. This time, Knives doesn't bother resisting it. Instead, he firmly strides towards whatever horrors they have planned, his fists tightly clenched at his sides. Would he see what was or what could have been? Or perhaps the Mists would torment him once again with Rem or the twisted alternate version of himself. The only way to find out is to move forward.

Between breaths, the wet suffocation of the mists gives way into the familiar dry suffocation of the deserts of No Man's Land. Knives finds himself needing to shield his eyes from the blazing sun beating down from above, and he wonders where on the planet he might be. There are several places he can think of that the Mists might send him, but when his eyes adjust he doesn't recognize his surroundings. Not that any part of the planet is particularly distinct outside of the cities. Here there was nothing for miles, except for the building Knives found himself standing by, a home by the looks of it, and something more curious.

A lone apple tree.

It and the small patch of grass at it's base stands in stark contrast to the desert around it. Barely five feet tall, and fairly pathetic in size, it bears a bounty of fruit all the same. It's a thing that shouldn't exist, and a small reminder of the resiliency of life.

More curious about the tree than the building, Knives approaches it and runs his fingers through it's leaves. A terraforming plant is the most obvious explanation for it's existence, but they usually covered great areas not just one small tree. Wondering if there might be a plant nearby he missed, Knives looks around and notices there's now a man standing between him and the house. If it wasn't for the fact that the man has black hair and wears only a tattered cloak, Knives might have been convinced he was looking in a mirror.

Not again, he thinks as his heart drops and he braces himself for a fight. His mind flashes back to Nai, and he wonders what fun and exciting ways this mirror will find to torture him. But, the mirror doesn't move. It just gives Knives a small, sympathetic smile.

"Aren't you tired?" it asks.

After everything he's experienced in the Mists, Knives is certain this must be some sort of trick. A riddle where the punishment for a wrong answer and the reward for the right one are both pain. Knives labors over how to answer, how to react, before he finally breaks. If there's no good outcome, then what's the point? Why try to win a rigged game?

"I'm exhausted," he breathes out in a heavy, shuddering breath.

"Has it been worth it?"

There's a pause as Knives' shoulders slump.

"I don't know."

The mirror regards Knives for a moment before deciding something, then walks towards him. Just as it comes within arm's reach, Knives' whole body tenses in preparation for whatever punishment it intends to give him, but it doesn't stop. It walks past Knives and pulls an apple from the tree and idly turns it over in it's hand.

"It hasn't," it concludes, "but he lives."

Knives twists to look at the mirror as he moves to speak, but instead he's hit with a wave of anguish that makes his tongue feel like a lead weight in his mouth. He doesn't need to be told what the look of resigned regret on the mirror's face means, and he realizes that everything has come full circle.

This is my future.

The conclusion echoes in Knives' mind. It's not worth it. It's not worth it. None of it ever was, nor would it ever have been. From as far back as the moment that Rem slipped through his fingers, the price far exceeded anything Knives intended to pay. It's a truth he always knew, but one he desperately buried deep, deep within his soul.

The Fall wasn't just about him and Vash, it was about them. It was about giving the three of them and his sisters a home safe from the horrors of humanity, but it fell apart almost immediately. Excuses were slapped over the cracks like duct tape. Rem was flawed. Vash was sick. The problem was never Knives or his plan. It couldn't be. He'd sacrificed so much, and the weight of accepting that it was all for nothing was far too heavy for him to bare.

"What am I supposed to do?" He asks, his voice cracking with emotion.

The mirror doesn't give an immediate answer. It turns the apple over in it's hands once, then twice, before turning to fully face Knives. It looks him in the eyes, and holds out the apple.

"Take care of him."

Knives reaches out for the apple with a lightly trembling hand, and as he takes it the scene begins to dissolve back into a swirl of mist. First the sand and heat, then the house, the tree, his mirror. Finally, the apple blows away to be replaced by a dot of warm liquid in the palm of his hand.

It's then that Knives becomes aware of the hot tears quickly soaking his cheeks. He tightly clasps his hand and presses it against his chest. It's such a simple truth, he can't help letting out a strained, wet laugh before the tears fully take over.

Take care of him.

#isola drabble #916 words #timeline wise i'll probably say this is the last thing that happens to knives re: the event #i kind of waffled on whether i wanted him to see the ending so this is a nice inbetween that gives him a bit of character development #bro i straight up had myself shedding tears writing this #why do we rp to hurt ourselves #MST: event

5 notes · View notes

sense-of-spring · 7 years ago

Text

As poor as rich a Hetalia Girls fanfic

And back with another idea. This time I'm gonna be using the Hetalia girls since they need more love. But enough talking here is key card to who is who.

Belgium: Laura von Oranje

Hungary: Elizabéta Héderváry

Belarus: Natalia Arlofskya

Ukraine: Irunya Yekterina

Liechtenstein: Lilli Vogel

And now lets begin! Shall we?

~*~

As long as I remember the girls were never that important people said. They were weak, useless and were only useful in the kitchen. Of course every girl said b*lsh*t but the men never bothered to listen.

Date:17/06/1830

Lauras POV

Laura was walking through the streets in Belgium. Ever since the machines were invented the air never clean. She coughed and kept walking she had to take of one of the girls who worked in the huge fabric.

She walked and walked through the unclean air before arriving by the house of the girls. She knocked on the door and waited for the door to open.

Natalias POV

"Natalia! Natalia! Wake up" her sister kept yelling from the kitchen. She got out grumbling "Where are mom and dad Irunya?" As she heard no response she walked out their little room seeing the small table already decked with two plates with usual potatoes with a little bit of bread and bullion made out of old meat and water.

My sister was already sitting at the table keeping the food warm. As she said "Good morning Irunya" she sat down beginning to eat this. We talked a little apparently my mom went washing our clothes and our dad was getting food.

There was knocking just when I was about to throw the rest food on the street. I opened the door to only see that rich kid Laura standing there. I hated her a lot because she looked nice and all that stuff. She was friends with my older sister so visited us when her family was on business.

She smiled at me saying "oh hallo Natalia" and I spotted back "hello Laura" with a disgusted face. I yelled to my sister "Irunya! Laura is here" my sister came out of the sewing/work room. Obviously she was happy to see her that little b*tch.

Irunyas POV

Natalia was doing her chore for this morning while I began working on the clothes we had to deliver tomorrow to get our payment.

When I suddenly I heard my sister yelling Laura was here I was glad and happy it was a long time since I saw here. I came out the room and saw Laura standing in the dress I sewed for her. I said "hello Laura!" With and happy and friendly tone.

I was aware we had to go soon but I haven't talked to her in a few months. I went to the front door and said "come in come in" standing in the front with open arms.

Lauras POV

When the door was opened I saw Natalia in the door opening. Of course I was aware she didn't like me as I saw how she always reacted when I came by.

She called for her older sister and my good friend Irunya. When I saw her coming out of there work room I knew she was busy and I almost felt guilty for coming now.

I responded to Irunya with "hallo good friend!" And I accepted her invitation to come in. As I stepped in I saw how poor they were. There was a lot of difference in everything but I kept that to myself. Often I wondered how they survived.

I started catching up with my good friend and I felt stared at because of Natalia who was cleaning the wool. After a while I heard the bells of the fabrics I knew they had to go. I stood up and said "Wish you much luck both of until next time" before I let myself out.

Natalias POV

Laura was away finally I thought. But of course now the boring part begins. It was very simple rich didn't have to work even had servants and lived in big fancy houses. We the poor small houses almost no money and everyone got ill because of the work.

I was taught this by my parents. But I shook this off and saw Lilli she was knew here and the youngest of a poor family of 5 children. Their mother moved away even though it was against the rules she didn't believe in god anyways.

I remember that day too well when I heard it all happening hence the whole neighbourhood could hear it. The mother moved to the unification of Sweden and Norway.

But I saw her standing there waiting for her two older brothers to show up. Of course they did but theh immediately went away to their work space. I was working in the space as her so of course I knew her. "Hello Lilli" I greeted her smiling a bit. She looked at me before "oh hallo Natalia" she began spacing out again before I said "come Lilli we have to go because otherwise we won't get paided for today!" And we rushed in. We were working as spinners what we did all day was spinning the wool and when needed getting water to make sure the machines didn't over heat.

Lillis POV

I arrived earlier this time. I had to get out my brother Roderich became ill and Gilbert too. So me,Ludwig and Vash had to work more than usual. I began an extra job as servant by a rich family together with them. If I recall correct that family was called 'von Oranje' family.

I spaced out a lot I was told but now I have way to much on my mind now. With us working more and our father taking care of them we barely saw each other. We never spoke with each other during the days and only saw each other during the dinner.

I was sad to see this but it left no choices. I was awakened by Natalia a co worker and good friend of mine. "Good morning Lilli" she had said and responded "oh hallo Natalia"before I heard her saying that and I went after her.

Elizabéta POV

I'm right now a the fabric my dad owns he tells me to never go inside and always stay clear of those ways. Of course I didn't listen I had friends here Gilbert and Roderich my two good friends.

My dad had forced me into this dress he wanted me to be a girl. As soon I left the puffy dress would become just a simple dress. How? Well that is a secret.

A walked the long streets to their house. I knew they were home because I only saw the three youngest Vash,Ludwig and Lilli today. As I saw there house from a distance I hoped that their dad was not home.

*magical time skip is very magical*

Irunya POV

As I just finished I bid my co workers farewell like usual. As I did I noticed someone standing by the gate she seemed to wait for someone.

I walked past here before I noticed she was like my friend Laura she was rich. I noticed that she tried blend in but it didn't work. It looked like she tried to speak to me so I said "Hello miss are you looking for something?"

She looked at me first before saying "Oh your not her..." She looked disappointed before saying "hallo miss do you happen to know when the spinning wheel part is done?" It always depends but Natalia said she is finished earlier than me.

I answered with "Umm miss your late those are the younger workers they are finished earlier" she just realized as she looked at me with me with wide open eyes.

The miss spoke again this time more friendly and said "oh okay so do you happen to know the Beilschmit-Vogel family?"I was wondering how she knew them.

I answered "yes I do Lilli is a good friend of my younger sibling" before excusing myself I really had to go. I still had to sew and and do many more chores.

The miss yelled something but I couldn't hear it because I already was far away. As I came home later on I saw already everyone sitting at the table like usual they were ready to pray to god.

They heard me and I saw only mom sitting my dad was not there. 'Were was he?' Was my first question. My mom looked down and said to me "Irunya please sit down" and as I did we prayed.

After dinner I was asked to stay and my mom told me our dad died and she wasn't feeling well so she had to stop working as well. This was all bad news me and my two younger siblings were working too hard already.

I looked down and went to the working room. We all three were working Natalia was washing the whool Ivan was spinning it and I was sewing clothes.

Lillis POV

I was home early my brothers were working late after all we needed the money. I went to the little farm we owned and I collected the eggs to sell tomorrow. Of course this was expensive but we got extra money out of owning this.

I was done and I took everything inside for protection. As I did I got called by my father "Lilli! You do everything yourself today!" I was already aware of that I thought but I just yelled back "okè dad!"

As I said that I went inside to only see my two ill brothers eating most of what we had left. They needed it I was aware but we were all hungry and we all needed to eat.

"Good day brother Gilbert brother Roderich" I said as I came their room in. I went to fetch their plates to clean them. As only Roderich responded after I almost left with "Good day sister Lilli" it was whispered and barely understandable.

I bid them farewell before I went outside their room to clean their plates. I washed my hands after it and waited for Vash and Ludwig to arrive.

#hetalia girls #part 1 #aph Hungary #aph Switzerland #aph liechtenstein #aph Belarus #aph ukraine #aph Austria #aph russia #aph belgium #aph Netherlands #aph Luxembourg #aph Prussia #aph germany

2 notes · View notes

nekithamajere · 8 years ago

Text

Kaaras

Two rough bits of story I’ve written for my new Inquisitor, Kaaras Adaar. Her beginning is AU in the fact that she’s an escaped Saarebas rather than a Tal-Vashoth. They’re not perfect, but I like them.

Inquisitor Kaaras did not like the direction her life was going. Just weeks earlier, she’d been part of a Tal-Vashoth mercenary group wandering around Orlais and Fereldan while trying not to earn the ire of the Qun.

Now Kaaras was going to recruit a probable Ben-Hassrath spy because the fledgling Inquisition needed forces more than it feared the Qun. Kaaras as the Herald of Andraste and agent of the Inquisition had to go offer the deal to Bull and his Chargers herself.

If Kaaras was honest with herself another reason as to why she was going was because Josephine had thought it would be a good idea to send ‘a fellow Qunari’ to see the Iron Bull.

Kaaras’s stomach was tied into knots and her hands were clammy. If she focused on her anxiety too much, she could feel the heavy collar around her neck and shoulders. She could feel the pull of too tight stitches forcing her mouth shut. She could feel the chains wrapped around her body and mind, and the cruel words spoken by her Arvaarad.

Thankfully, Cassandra and Varric’s bickering were providing ample distraction. Varric wouldn’t shut up about the rain, Cassandra complained about his complaining, and the argument was going in circles.

A shudder ran down Kaaras’s spine, and she couldn’t help but bring her fingers to touch the rough scars around her mouth.

“You alright, Herald?” Varric asked suddenly, breaking Kaaras’s thoughts, “I don’t ever think I’ve seen qunari look this worried about anything.”

“Yes well, most of the Qun don’t need to worry about having their lips sewn shut,” Kaaras growled, almost slipping into the language of Saarebas. All growls, and subtle gestures. A secret for all Saarebas and their Arvaarad.

Varric looked about to say something else, but then stepped into a puddle. Cassandra, took the chance to speak over Varric’s angered grumbling.

“Is that really a concern?”

“It is if he’s a Ben-Hassrath spy and has an Arvaarad with him,” Kaaras replied, “I won’t survive an encounter like that without a serious fight.”

“Speaking of which,” Solas gestured to an opening in the small copse of trees, toward the beach, “Isn’t that them over there?”

The Iron Bull and his Chargers were fighting a battle with a rather large group of bandits, which they seemed to be winning. A pile of bodies, the Tevinters perhaps? Kaaras watched as reinforcements for the bandits came. Swallowing hard, she charged into battle. With a practiced ease, she reached for the crackling lighting to come to her fingertips, and let her anxiety turn into magic.

Iron Bull wasn’t expecting anyone’s magic, except for Dalish’s, and looked up to see another kossith charge into battle. She was clearly Tal-Vashoth. She was old for a Tal-Vashoth too, actually. Silver streaks were running through her black hair. One horn was broken roughly in half, and the other was cracked and chipped.

Charging an opponent so he could get a better look, Bull was even more shocked. She wasn’t just a Tal-Vashoth, she was an escaped Saarebas. Uneasily, Bull realized that these were the Inquisition agents.

Krem hadn’t mentioned another kossith in his report. Bull had a tough decision to make. Would he and the Chargers risk working with a Saarebas, even if the pay was phenomenal?

As Bull took down another bandit, the Tal-Vashoth used her magic to move to the other side of battle so quickly that if Bull had blinked, he would have missed it. Using her hands rather than the staff strapped across her back, she used her impressive arm muscles to break an unsuspecting bandit’s neck from behind.

Soon, the bandits were dead, but the Chargers were still uneasy. Bull thought about the next order he would give, in spite of the Qun’s orders. Then, he caught a glimpse of the glowing green mark on the Tal-Vashoth’s hand, and he stopped.

“Chargers, stand down!” His voice carried clear across the battlefield, and his men obeyed. The Tal-Vash-Herald’s group stood down as well, though their hands hovered over their weapons.

The only one who looked as uneasy as Bull felt was the person who was supposed to be able to fix the tear in the sky. Ignoring her and her group of three, Bull turned to Krem. He needed to see how she’d react before making any decisions.

“Krem, how’d we do!?”

“Six wounded, not seriously. No dead.”

Bull nodded, if things went south he would have his men to back him up, “Good. Let the throatcutters finish, and we’ll break open the casks for a job well done!” Finally turning toward the Herald, Bull let out an easy laugh, hoping to put her at ease, “It’s true! The Chantry must love you! A Qunari mercenary is the ‘Herald of Andraste’. Who’d have thought?” Bull let out another chuckle, smiling, gauging her reactions.

“Shanedan, Iron Bull,” Her voice was low and raspy. He couldn’t be sure if it was from all the years of disuse, or if it was because she still felt uncomfortable speaking out loud.

“No need for that, makes everyone jumpy.”

Her mouth creased into a small frown. He wondered why, before remembering he was supposed to win her trust so he could inform the Arishok if intervention was needed.

“You’ve seen us fight. I won’t lie, we’re expensive, but we’re well-worth it. I’m sure your Inquisition can afford to pay us. What do you think?,” Bull sat on a nearby rock, turning his back just long enough to see if she would strike. Thankfully, she didn’t.

She looked around, eyeing the men who were finishing making sure everyone that was supposed to be dead was. She eyed Bull speculatively, eyeing his multitude of scars and easygoing manner.

“You seem useful,” She replied eventually.

“You won’t just be getting the men, y’know. You’ll be getting me. A bodyguard to soak up damage if you need it. The best one you’ll find in Ferelden. It doesn’t matter if it’s demons or dragons, the bigger the better. I’m your man.”

She nodded slowly, “What else?”

Bull made himself look even more nonchalant, while standing up and moving so he could protect himself if needed, “This’ll piss you off, might be useful. I’m Ben-Hassrath.”

“Hissrad,” She hissed like it was a vile insult. Her face pinched, “Why the Inquisition?”

“Uncontrollable magic like the Breach makes life difficult everywhere. They want me to get close to the Inquisition so I can report what’s going on. I also get reports from Ben-Hassrath all over Orlais and Ferelden. I can share that with the Inquisition.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Whatever happened at the Conclave is bad. The Breach needs to be closed, and quickly. I’m on your side, to do what needs to be done to end that,” Bull pointed to the Breach, which could still be seen from the Storm Coast even with the rain, “That needs to go before it seriously wrecks everything.”

Her pale eyes were narrow, searching. Her scarred lips were pursed in thought. Finally, she extended a hand that was missing parts of fingers, “Kaaras.”

“The Iron Bull,” Cautiously, he shook.

For better or worse, for now at least, Bull and his Chargers were going to help the Inquisition.

It wasn’t until the third night on the road that Bull began to seriously question his choice. They had set up camp, Kaaras and her party. Bull had been travelling with his men, and the Herald’s on and off throughout the journey. He had decided to set camp Kaaras’s party as a show of good faith.

He’d been relaxing in his tent, waiting for everyone else to fall asleep before even making an attempt himself, when a mumbled protest caught his attention. He froze, reaching for one of the daggers he kept hidden on himself, and waited.

A strangled gasp from the right, and stumbled footsteps into the dark. Moving slowly and quietly, Bull peered out of the gap in his tent entrance.

There was Kaaras, her hair sticking up in all directions, faced pinched with worry. Shaking hands massaged her temples. She sat heavily on a tree stump, and rested her head in her hands. A shaky, almost silent sob shook her body. Several deep breaths got her under control, and she stayed still for what seemed like an eternity.

One hand touched the jagged edge of her broken horn, and the other to her lips. Quietly, almost quietly enough that Bull didn’t hear her, she spoke:

“Shok ebasit hissra. Meraad astaarit, meraad itwasit, aban aqun.” Struggle is an illusion. The tide rises, the tide falls, but the sea is changeless. A prayer for the dead turned into a mantra, perhaps?

Bull moved to his previous position in his tent, ignoring the sounds of the Herald going back to her tent. His thoughts were plagued by idea that the ‘Herald’ would turn into an abomination because she was uneasy with his presence.

He was seriously beginning to doubt his decision.

“Are you alright? You haven’t seemed yourself since Tiny joined us.”

Kaaras sighed, rubbing her eyes with the heels of her hands, “I’m suspicious.”

“Then why’d you take him on?”

“We need the troops.”

“We could have done without.”

“We need the extra muscle. It isn’t fair to Cassandra to do all the heavy lifting,” the attempt at a joke fell flat.

Varric shot her a pointed look, and Kaaras sighed. Her fingers travelled to the scars on her lips, and her eyes shot open. Standing hurriedly, she fumbled as her fingers grasped at buttons and straps. Her coat was discarded, as was the outer layer of armour.

“Sorry, but I’m not interested. I’m flattered you’d think of me that way, thou-” A murderous glare made the words stick in his throat.

Soon enough, she managed to shrug off the shirt underneath her armour, angling her head so the fabric wouldn’t get caught on what was left of her horns. All that was left of clothing for her upper body was some type of support for her breasts; Varric wasn’t sure of the name. It certainly wasn’t from Orlais, Ferelden, or the Free Marches.

Varric paled at the sight. Around her neck, previously hidden by high collars and layers of clothing, was deep set gouges that had long healed. Her shoulders were covered by the same marks, and Varric was reminded of the collars worn by the mages he’d seen in Kirkwall.

Her shoulders and arms were covered in burn marks, lacerations, and an array of other marks Varric couldn’t identify. Slowly turning around, Kaaras bared her back. Varric knew that it was a miracle that Kaaras was alive. Clearly, she’d been whipped within of an inch of her life multiple times. Permanent bruising marred the skin of her back, underneath the thick ropey scars that covered almost every inch of her skin.

“I will be killed by an agent of the Qun if one is allowed too close to me. I will not relax until we know exactly what this hissrad wants.”

“His-raad?” Varric asked, as if testing the word on his lips.

“Liar. It’s what they call the spies.”

Varric nodded, and averted his gaze as Kaaras redressed herself. Watching as she smoothed the wrinkles from her clothes, Varric could almost pretend he hadn’t seen the cruelty of the Qun. Then he remembered the cruelty of templars, and had to force himself not to shudder at the comparisons.

Now, more than ever, the puckered scars surrounding her lips seemed prominent.

#dragon age inquisition #kaaras adaar #dai au #fanfiction #oc

0 notes