#i wish i was better at drawing on my computer than i am because it's kind of a pain

[sporco-filth]

I hope you go ahead with your cyoa slob game, there's so little stuff with slob goodness

i have left this project on the backburner so long i kind of considered giving up on it completely but you know what, you're right, anonymous tumblr user, there's not enough slob stuff.

I'm not promising anything, but I'll try to finish it.

If I'm not mistaken, the hard part of the coding is done, I just need to finish the artwork and make the writing better. It's a functional game (more or less) but it's just got a lot of placeholder text and images.

[justhere4kpop]

How Hongjoong Celebrates You

Pair: Kim Hongjoong x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Headcanons. Idol Joong

Summary: Just one aspect of how I think Joong would handle an important day.

W/C: 880

a/n: @pocketjoong Happy Birthday to you my love, my sky, my everything. I love you so much and I am forever grateful that our lives have intersected the way they did. May our lives continue to dance with each other throughout the year and many more. I hope you have an amazing day and lots of good things to come.

He either sets up something elaborate or flies by the seat of his pants. There’s no in between

Either way, he’s probably cheesy AF because he’s so head over heels for you.

He’d probably been planning this for months. I.e. he wouldn’t stop talking about it and planning it with the guys, they’re tired of hearing Joong’s perfect plan for your birthday.

He knows how much you love the pirate theme the group has, you even saved him as Captain in your phone.

You wake up and there’s an unread text on your phone. “Hongjoong is probably at the studio” you think

“Good Morning My Love, you make every day shine brighter than the last. When you see this your first gift is in the drawer.”

Mysterious

After your own morning coffee and some food, you finally decide to indulge in his games and look in the bedside drawer. 

A sticky note…of course, he planned a treasure hunt… “Go to the place I see your smile light up my morning.”

He always catches you brushing your teeth in the morning.

A note on the mirror that says “Your smile is brighter than the sun.” another note next to your toothbrush. 

“After you get ready head to the place we had our first date.”

This man is really about to make you drive over the whole city.

Your first date was at a cafe that quickly became your favorite place because it always reminded you of him.

“Hey!” your favorite barista saw you enter.

“I’m looking for Hongjoong actually,” you say

“Oh I saw him earlier…he asked me to give you this actually.” he handed you your usual order and on it a heart and a note. Also a Rose…

“I bought your favorites so you can start your day right. How about you come to see me where I finally asked you to be mine?”

The park for your 6th date wasn’t the most magical, in fact, it felt like the place where everyone became a couple. It was still special to you.

There was a photo on the tree by the spot where he asked you…yeah this was definitely Joong

The photo was of the two of you, he brought a Polaroid around. 

The back had a message “How about that time I made you a song? Where’d we first listen to it?” and the drawing of a rose.

I’M TIRED OF YOUR GAMES HONGJOONG

Heading back the way to KQ with your headphones on, of course, you’re heading to the studio…he couldn’t just stay home and enjoy the day with you.

You’re standing in front of the building and realizing this man has made you go all over the city on your own birthday…infuriating.

Now you’re hungry so you stop for food in the 7-11 located on the bottom floor.

“Hey, y/n. Joong said you’d probably be by so he bought these for you.” the clerk said handing you the snacks.

Another Rose….

KIM HONGJOONG

You make your way into KQ running into some of the workers who knew about you and Hongjoong, they wished you Happy Birthday and handed you a Rose each saying it was from Joong…

You reach the studio and pause

He better be in there.

Nope…

Your song is playing though.

Now you’re tired and want to go home.

His computer is open and it says “I know you’re tired my love, I’m sorry for all the games, head home I promise I’ll be there.”

He’s about to be even more sorry

He’s definitely on the couch for a week, maybe a month. The pocas?? Sleep with him.

You hear a faint melody as you get to your floor.

He planned this.

You open the door and it’s like the day melted away. No longer mad he made you run all over the city looking for him…well maybe a little still

There are petals on the floor and candles. You know the standard romantic things.

There’s a song playing in the background, you haven’t heard it before but you know it’s your Joong’s voice.

“Welcome home Darling.” he smiled turning around to face you holding out a rose.

“Yahhh Kim Hongjoong.”

“I know but I had to get you out of the house to set this up.” he smiled a small twinkle in his eye.

“Sometimes you’re too romantic.” you chuckle at him.

“Hey at least I remembered this year.” he winced.

Last year was a mess with touring and everything, you couldn’t blame him for not having his head on straight. 

Didn’t make it any less special he tried his best. He even flew you out to see him.

“I love you.” he smiled and took all the flowers from you.

“And just what do you have planned?” you raised your eyebrow.

“Oh just the only gift I think is suitable for you.” he dropped to one knee, box in hand.

ARE YOU GOING TO SAY YES??? HMMMM??

“You are truly a pain in my ass Kim Hongjoong.”

“But only yours.” he smiled and slipped the ring on.

“I think the members would say otherwise.

“Nah…those are our pains in the ass now.” he kissed your hand and hummed along to the song playing.

He wrote another love song for you.

This is a long forever.

Network: @cromernet

[alymccart]

Hello! Could you possibly give a humble peasant like me some anatomy advice? The way you draw bodies and hands is just *chef's kiss* ;w;

I wish I had an easy answer for this... but for me what helped a ton was drawing A LOT. I've been working on this skill seriously for probably 25 years at this point. I am my own worst critic and know I have so much I can improve upon. VERY IMPORTANT, drawing from life (or photographs/video stills/screenshots/etc, *not tracing, photography distorts shapes*) has got to be my number 1 suggestion for how to get better with anatomy and drawing in general. Since it's hard to get out and do that a lot, my back up is photos. I particularly like finding photos and videos of athletes mid-motion because they are far more dynamic than staged photography). The studio classes I attended in college where we spent 6 hours just drawing models over and over again were a slog to get through, but the skills honed in them were invaluable.

I've gotten to the point where I can sorta fake it and come up with anatomy from my head, but I always try to find some kind of reference to back up my mental creation. REFERENCE is KEY. It is so so so important. There is no shame in using it, and I don't see the point in making a huge deal about *not* using it. That was a pervasive thing floating around back when I was active on deviantART a long time ago and it was not good.

Another thing to consider paying close attention to with regards to reference is drawing what you see, not what you THINK you see. Brains form biases that will interfere with what you're trying to draw. I've flipped references upside down to force my brain to recalculate as I go for this reason.

Any step, no matter how tiny, is a step toward improvement. Even just going out to a park or something and sketching whatever crosses your path is great. Or you could do the same thing on the computer while you watch videos or look at photos. Animals, people, trees, plants, whatever. It'll all help you improve. And don't worry about accuracy at first! Just draw whatever gestures come to mind. Like 99% of it will look like scribbly garbage (it did for me and a lot of my peers) but it does help. Hands, in particular, are really hard. Very early on in my artistic path I realized this and kind of became obsessive about drawing them properly, so I drew a *lot* of hands. Whole sketch pages of just hands. The great thing about hands is that you've got your own! You can just draw the hand in front of you, or take a picture of the gesture you need and use that as reference. Many places will have studios open to the public where you can do model/life drawings (some nude, so if that's a concern, be sure to check first). Some will be free, or you'll have to pay some kind of fee (they need to pay the models). One free online resource that's good is Posemaniacs.com. I highly recommend the 30 second drawing tool, wherein you only have 30 seconds to sketch out the reference before it cycles to a new, random one. The extreme time limit forces your brain into overdrive and it is shocking how quickly you can improve as a result. We did this in school, as well, with live models. They'd just switch up poses every time a timer rang. I could probably go on for hours about this, there's a lot of jumbled thoughts coming to mind, but I think this is a good starting point. Persevere, don't seek perfection, and treat yourself kindly because this is a skill that requires a lot (mentally and physically) to hone and it isn't easy. Every artist has their ups and downs, but I think it's worth the struggle to be able to create. I really hope this helps! Thanks for the ask! A little bonus snippet: Back in high school I was *terrified* of drawing people because I sucked ass at it. I was garbage. Absolutely refused to do it. I drew animals and dragons and gryphons and stuff and when I started angling toward my career I had assumed I would continue in that direction. Nope! Now I'm drawing pretty much nothing but people/humanoids and I love it.

[flightyquinn]

AI Haters, Please Read to the End

I see people celebrating every time something bad happens in the AI art world, and that makes me very sad. Because I am partially colorblind, and have ADHD, clinical depression, and other health issues that I'm less comfortable talking about. Because I can't work, and rely on family for housing and government assistance to afford essentials. For someone like me, the barrier to entry on art is high. I'm never going to own a drawing tablet, I can't get professional lessons, my focus sucks to the point where it's hard to follow tutorials no matter how much I want to, and even if all of that could be sorted, my own eyes are against me.

But I still have ideas. I still have pictures in my head that want to get out. Characters that want faces, scenes that want to be expressed, and the like. I'm still creative. I just can't properly express that creativity. Nor can I pay someone else to express it for me. However, I can tell an AI what I'm trying to depict. I can tweak the settings, make small changes, spend hours on end generating and re-generating, tweaking and re-tweaking, and making small edits that are within my power to do, until I have a picture that satisfies my need to bring the thing in my head to life. That's not "stealing". It's not pushing a button and letting the computer do the work for me. That's me having my own ideas, and trying to use the tools at my disposal to turn them into something that other people can see.

Plus, there's one other thing I can do. This is a picture I generated with AI that I'm actually quite proud of.

And do you know why? Because it started as this.

I fed my terrible MSPaint rough as hell doodle into an AI, and told it what the picture was supposed to be. And I tried again, and again, and again, until I was able to refine the result into something that I was happy with - which took a whole lot more than just pressing the button again, let me tell you.

This is my idea, from start to finish, and my shitty art became something that actually looks halfway decent. Yeah, I'm aware of the wonkiness and AI jank. I know the jawline's weird, his eyes don't match, and there's something up with his ear. It's not perfect, but it's a whole lot better than what I could do on my own.

Look, when it comes to stopping the commercialization of AI art, I'm right there with you guys. Fuck corporations that want to replace their whole art department. Fuck people who want to impersonate other artists, or take commissions to turn someone's description of what they want into a prompt. Hell, fuck the people who take the first result they're given without trying to refine it at all!

However, I don't want AI to die. AI is an accessibility option. AI is a tool that lets me go from saying for years, "I wish I could have art of my first D&D character, I have so many fond memories of him." to having that one picture. It lets me stop stealing every time I want a character portrait for a new TTRPG that I'm starting up. Because you know what? I don't have the ability to be a "real artist", and I never will. There's too many barriers for entry.

...and my situation is mild compared to what some people have to deal with. Sure, there are people who find ways to make traditional art despite disabilities, but that's an exception. It could be the rule. Why shouldn't it be?

As far as "theft" goes, I have yet to hear one explanation of why it's okay to use references, but not AI, that didn't boil down to "it's different when we do it". And what about collage? Is a collage art, or is it "theft?" What about sculptural works that use reclaimed objects? They didn't create that. They just decided how it would be arranged. Hell, what about pieces like "The Fountain" for that matter? That's a big problem I have with all this hate. If you applied the same standards to other things as to AI, then there's a lot of things that currently are art we'd have to say aren't any more.

If you have a problem with AI, why not work to make it better, instead of trying to deprive people who rely on it for self-expression of a creative outlet?

[izzydizzy13]

ok real talk for a second

how are we avoiding AI gang?

Like, I see a lot of people quitting Instagram bc of their policy to feed art to the Meta AI, and I agree that it is not Cash Money of them to do that... but I am also not entirely sure how it changes anything, because doesn't literally *every* website populate Google? If so, doesn't Google's AI take that anyway, as well as any image AI that uses Google as a database? so most of them, from what I can tell...

Am I fundamentally misunderstanding how this works? I ask because most of the art I have seen here recently hasn't been glazed as far as I can tell visually, and while Tumblr isn't feeding images straight to AI the same way Instagram is, I am still worried for y'all. I kind of hope I AM just confused, because it would be fantastic to have places where I could upload unglazed works in their pure, unswirly form. I just thought I could Glaze my future works and upload them wherever I would usually upload, including Instagram because, well, their AI isn't any better at reading it than Dal-E as far as I'm aware. It is gonna be quite annoying though, because it takes upwards of an hour to glaze something to the Default strength, and I like uploading silly little doodles that only took like 5 minutes in and of themselves lol, so I'll have to be more picky about what I post...

Anyways, I am gonna start using Glaze on my art at the minimum, I tested it with an older work and it's not very noticeable. I'll drop the glazed piece here for anyone who has been curious about how it would affect their art visually and been too scared to try using it

the grass looks bad because of me, that's my fault for not knowing how to draw grass. The Glaze is that swirly triangular pattern that is most noticeable in the exact middle of the image, on the shorts and leg. It is virtually invisible on the face, which is the part I care most about anyway. So, while yes it would be an annoying affect if it were something really aggressively well-rendered, I've got very few issues with it for my more cartoony art style. It's the default amount of glaze, so not the highest tier of protection possible but enough.

I didn't really care about AI theft when it was still in its infancy, I still don't think it's the end of the world or anything like that, people enjoy art for the personal connection it has with its artist, and I like to think AI will never fully replicate that... not to mention that all of these AIs are in for a legal nightmare once someone sues for copyright infringement ... but, with how high quality the images are becoming and how thoroughly integrated it is into many of our browsers and websites, I still don't wish to help it any further if at all possible.

For anyone who wants to utilize this anti-AI Glaze, here's the link to downloads for Glaze

There is a browser version as well, though it requires an invite (automatically granted to anyone who doesn't use AI via email) I haven't tried that one yet, my computer is thankfully able to run the desktop version so I've had no need to get an invite.

If this is the first you're hearing about Glaze, I should also mention that there is a thing called Nightshade on this very same website. It does a very similar thing to Glaze, except for that it also gives AI models incorrect information when fed to it that, through a bunch of technical stuff that I don't understand, actually makes the AI worse than it was before. I've decided to just use the regular Glaze since, personally, my goal isn't to screw over the devs who made the AI, even if it's something I disagree with. I just don't want my work utilized, so I will Glaze it and move on. I can't really blame anyone who uses Nightshade though, just explaining why I don't.

I was also wondering if any of y'all have a contingency plan in the case of AI developing to the point where Glaze doesn't work anymore... like are we just gonna have to delete everything from the last however long we've been glazing or what? yike

[andywinter16]

FFXV and Assassin´s Creed AU

This AU is for @versusthirteen. Don´t worry, I will write the bickering fic just need some time (lot of time, because the other asks that I need to post first). But instead have some of my quick headcanons when the two worlds collide :) (I have some more, If you wanted?)

--

Due to Isu and Astrals shenaningas Noctis with boys ended in other dimension. With their luck, in middle of assault on the assassins. Noctis uses his powers which reacts even more violently in this world. “ Who the hell are you, dudes?” said man with white hood, while covering. “Well, I am -” Gladio turns his head “ Less talking Noct, more fighting.” Desmond and others took boys with them to their hideout, even if Lucy and Shaun were mistrusting at first. 

- there is so many questions about their origin and powers, it was intimidating 

- Noct showed them his arminger “ That is remarkable! Becca, do you think we could replicate something like that?” “ Shaun, I am tech not a damn magician.” “ But with the right equiptment and Isu artefact, it could be possible, no?” Lucy said thoughtfully.

- Ignis ultimately wins them with his cooking. “ Pardon me, but you can´t seriously eat fast food all the time, right?” Becca repairing computer answered. “ Not all the time, we also have some energy bars.” Needless to say, Ignis was horrified. He prepared for all of them 5 course meal. “Ignis, you are the best cook ever, aren´t you in need for a wife?” “ Or husband, If you swing that way.”

-  Ignis and Shaun bicker with each other like a married couple. They even had a three hour debate about “Why is tea better than your stinky muddy coffee, Scientia.” “ I would rather drink mine than your tasteless dry leafes with hot water, Hastings.” IT.WAS.SCARY.

- Desmond thinks of Noctis and Prompto as younger brothers that he never had, of course they are his partners in crime (Wish he could intruduce them to Clay, who would also loved them)

- Lucy shares with them the three tenets of assassins:  Stay one's blade from the flesh of the innocent; draw not attention to oneself whenever possible; and never compromise the brotherhood. “In other words” Des joined in the conversation,” don´t stabby stab wrong people, be good at hide and seek and bros before corruption.”

- “ Hey, Becca, Des wanna hear a joke?” “ Sure, sunshine.”  “ Hit us with it, Prompt.”  “ Okie dokie, do you know without what you can´t spell assassin? “ Lucy, Shaun, Ignis and Gladio side-eyeing him. “Without what Prompt?” inquired Noct. “ Obviously, without ass, sass and sin.” “ And I have all of it!” exclaimed Des. “ Desmond, bloody hell!”

- Rebecca shows boys her “Baby”, which are impressed with her skills. Prompto is allowed to help her.

- Gladio is jogging every morning with the girls. He´s being very supportive and shares fitness tips

- But boys weren´t the only one, who was accidentaly send to this dimension ...

“Oh, well hello there, young man! What a nice abodement you have here.”

Daniel is shocked and pulls out a gun. “ Who the fuck are you!?” The man before him looked so real, was the Bleeding effect kicking in again?

“Now now, young man. Why such animosity? I believe we can fix each other problems.” 

Daniel´s eyebrow quirks. “ What problem?” “ Oh, isn´t that obvious? You´re looking for some trouble maker named Desmond, correct? I can help you find him, but I also want something in return. A little service of gratitude, so to speak.”

Daniel studied the man´s face. He didn´t trust him, but he would lie if he said he wasn´t intrigued. “For the record, I don´t trust you. But I am kinda impressed you´ve got through our security.” which would be fired, when he wraps it up here, “ but I am not the one who you should ask for favour, If if it turns out that you are valuable asset.” 

“ Oh my, so guarded. But believe me, you´re not gonna regret it.” 

The man smiled creepily. Daniel shivered at that. He had unshaky feeling that he just get into some clusterfuck. 

 The man tips his hat.“ Oh, but where are my manners! Let me introduce to you, my name is Ardyn Izunia.” 

Please, read this in Ardyn´s voice. It gets much better XD

[umbrx]

have u ever think to ask AI to draw doffy and viola together?

Short answer: no.

Long answer: I will assume this comes from genuine curiosity and/or frustration that there isn't too much art of Doffy and Viola as a ship. If so, I understand the wish to see more art of them together, but have never experienced the frustration by the lack of it. In my opinion, there are two ways to go about it:

Commissioning an artist to draw the ship and paying for their services.

Learning to draw and doing it yourself.

AI (overused term as it's not actual artificial intelligence, but I digress) is a very controversial topic, but as someone who is working on machine learning models myself, I am more than aware what goes on with it. I can't change your personal opinion on it, dear anon, but I'll try to make my case as to why I'm against it and its use, and hopefully discourage you from doing it yourself.

Firstly, machine learning models demand training sets. In the case of generative adversarial networks or GANs, their primary training sets consist of images. Thousands upon thousands of images.

Where are these images from? Artists; their art posted on the internet. Their depictions of art, personal interpretations, redrawings, original characters, art of favourite characters, nature, commissions for others, photos, etc.

Is permission to use these images ever sought from them? No. Images are stored into datasets on big servers with no questions asked whatsoever and the models are trained on them. Same as when you google something and save the picture to your personal computer. By all means, that is already copyright infringement if you don't have permission from the artist to download their work. Just because it's online, doesn't imply you're meant to take it. You wouldn't take fruit from a fruit stand before paying for it, right? Hopefully.

The problem with art generative models like Midjourney, DALL-E and others is the fact they're trained on illegally obtained artwork, and they're making profit off of it (we can debate back and forth on the costs of keeping the servers running, whether it would be better if they were free for use, etc, etc, but let's not go down that rabbit hole — still no). Each one demands a subscription for you to use their services. Sure, the art they generate is very fast and it is good, but it lacks character. There's a reason why we can tell something is "AI generated" or not.

Secondly, I respect the craft. Being an artist means constant improvement, no matter if you're a professional or a hobbyist. It requires hours upon hours of practice, be it self-taught or through education. It requires time, money, patience and a strong will to continue pursuing it. It's blood, sweat and tears, just like other artistic crafts. Not to mention how soulful art is when done by a human being. An art style (while people can try and copy it) is something unique. It's an expression of an individual human being, and their art – no matter what the subject is, is something you get to see once in a lifetime. It's a collection of thoughts, emotions and ideas brought to life through dedicated effort over time. It mustn't be devalued just because computers can generate something faster.

I can go on and on about this, in all honesty, but I'll stop myself here. Again, your actions are your own and I can't tell you what to do and what not to do. I'd always opt for commissioning an artist whose style I like. I'm guaranteed to get a unique, never seen before piece of art that I know I'll love. If I were in no position to pay someone, then I'd get to it and start drawing myself. There's tons of tutorials on how to learn to draw from people who have spent years perfecting their art. There are plenty of tips around so you don't make all the mistakes they did. There are whole communities out there to help you out to improve. Not all shortcuts in life should be pursued.

[thegoldenshi-shi]

So, I have been busy making poor monetary choices again, in which I now own two different types of tablets specifically for art (ONE WAS VERY MUCH ON SALE, THE OTHER HAD A 50 BUCK COUPON, BOTH GOOD REVIEWS), and the first tablet I bought, that's honestly just a way of adding a touchscreen to a computer to me, cause like. It's a sensor pad? Well, it's proving that I can't mentally make myself apply a lot of pressure to technology, which my younger self with a ruined dsi touch screen would gape at. I have also gotten all my shelving units up! Not sure if they're staying where they are, or if I'm gonna move them around again, but I do know two that are staying where they are, mainly cause I am /not/ lifting that shelf all the way back up to chest level to take it back down again. Nuh uh, no ma'am, it will not be done. It's also gotten all my collectibles on it already, which has proven that I need to devote more of my budget to the Twins than Screamer. My frenemesis would be delighted to see my failure to my simpees.

Work has been better! Still hot, but we've slowed /way/ down, which means my supervisor has been letting me goof off on my phone or writing, cause we physically can't work too hard in the heat, but we also have no orders anyway, so... And because we've been able to get paid Not Working, I have gotten back into a werewolf story I started writing months ago! I'm setting it up one shot style rn, and posting the chapters as my brain accepts my pleading for their creation, but I also intend to make it a full and proper story once I've worked all the one shots out. I will openly admit to it being complete self service, cause I want a best friend who's 8 feet tall, fluffy, and has a crappy sense of humor. And is a cuddle monster, though that one is mainly cause I love glomming full force onto my people and displaying my awkward affection. I'm like a peacock, but instead of flaring tail feathers, I hug people in front of other people, whilst not actually really knowing socially accepted norms for hugging friends, tbh.

I also went through and completely reorganized my phones gallery, and got a very stupid laugh outta it. I have 461 transformers related pictures, and almost 400 writing prompts. Just. Saved on my phone. If I ever lose this sim card my writing career that i don't actually have will be over. On another other note semi related, I have been asked to design a friends tattoo! I don't know if I mentioned that in my last ask. He asked me to draw him a dragon to get tattooed, which, to be fair, dragons are among one of the very scant things I can draw well reliably, but also, dragon proportions curled into a ball sleeping are kicking my ass, and I am debating getting out my giant sketchpad to be able to completely control every tiny eetsy beetsy detail, cause my close friend wants me to do this thing that will permanently be on his body, and I really desperately don't wanna mess it up... Cause like. No one has ever asked me to ///draw/// for them before. I've gotten asked to paint, or do some small stuff with watercolors, but never /drawing/. And he knows I love dragons, it's part of why he asked. I just. It's a thing that happened that made me really happy, like hide in my pillow crying happy tears happy.

And then, on the fifth, I found an exactly 8 year old video of my childhood dog that we had to put down... it was from the summer before he was put down, which happened during the school year. He had been all that I'd had growing up, so, it hit kinda hard seeing something of him that moved. Even after 8 years, I still cry every time I think about him. He was the best dog any little kid could've ever been raised with, and probably helped boost my immune system against my allergies to boot, hehe. I cried for like, two hours, cause it was a video taken 7/5/2015. And, I thought I had lost all my images of him. It was a happy thing, just. A very sad type of happy. I wish I could tell him that I did love him, even if I didn't wanna lay on the ground and cuddle like he preferred. He was a dog that was born old, haha, never wanted to play or bark, he just wanted to lay on you and be loved. I was always running around on imaginary adventures though, but I did love him. If I was upset, he was my safe place. I promise this is a happy thing, it's just that I'm gonna be legally allowed to drink soon, and sometimes I forget that it's been so long since I got to see him. Especially cause sometimes, I still have dreams about playing with him in our backyard, right next to a giant pine tree covered in cicada sheds, laughing as he dug a little groove to lay in under the old rusted out trampoline. He was the most patient, tolerant dog, and it's because of him and the cat he raised with me that I'm not afraid of so much anymore. Ma and dad weren't there when we had him, but... I'll admit to giving them up forever if it meant I got to have him back

~Smooch

Hello there Smooch~

Sleeping babee dragon sounds so cute! I've never designed a tattoo, so I can only imagine the pressure (and of course the touching part of him asking you to draw his tattoo design).

Interestingly enough I too spent a loooong period of time where drawing was a dragon-only zone. I think it was back in like middle school? If you're struggling with a traditional four-legged two winged dragon, have you considered another type? There's Asian Lung dragons, Wyverns, Wyrms, or even a Quetzalcoatl style dragon that can all be very cool and might be easier for you to draw as a sleepy loaf. If your friend doesn't have a strong preference of course.

How exciting, on sale art supplies. It's kinda hard to decide sometimes between art supplies and if you're new to it, it's not a BAD idea to try multiple different types and/or brand names until you find what you like. I own two different art devices, one Wacom Intuos bought in High School and a Huion art monitor bought like four years ago. I was a traditional artist at the time I bought the Intuos tablet, so I quickly found that I prefer drawing on an actual screen I can look at instead of drawing on a tablet, BUT I had to try the tablet first to know that. What that all amounts up to is I hope you like one if not both of them ^J^ It's good to hear that your job is calming down. I'm sure that you're enjoying having the down time to work on your creative pursuits. At the risk of sounding too much like a hippie art teacher, I say it's very important to have some sort of creative outlet in your life. So it's wonderful to hear that you're getting to write on your werewolf story. I send you my best wishes that your muse stays nice and cooperative for the whole process hehe.

And lastly: The bittersweet memory of a good pet that has passed is something that I feel blessed to have as well. I hope that you can continue to enjoy your memories of a good animal without being bogged down in the sadness of their passing.

It's good to hear from you again Smooch, glad to hear you are doing well~

[fragileizy]

my parents tensed up last night when i said i wanted to go back upstairs alone.

friday night in the big city and i was ready to turn in at 7pm. maybe it’s the depression, or maybe the heartache, or maybe both. maybe the cold. it’s freezing and i don’t do well when i have to wear layers. i want to peel off my skin whenever i have to wear more than two shirts.

i wanted to go back upstairs. back upstairs and watch more cartoons so i could turn off my brain, but my parents wanted to stay in the lounge— i’d been able to get a few large bitefuls of dinner into me before hand— to listen to the live music in the reception desk + bar area where surprisingly a lot of people were congregated.

i wondered if i should get a drink myself. i don’t do alcohol, never have, always afraid to. i realized i’d left my wallet back upstairs with my phone, one that i’m on the tip-edge of powering off and chucking into a trashcan, so i don’t have to wonder and wish to get a text message.

dear god, i am grateful to get text messages at all. it means he’s thinking of me. even if it’s just to tell me that he’s seeing his new girlfriend today.

“no, not right now, i don’t want to go up. it’s different here than back at home,” my mom said. “we don’t have life back at home. live music? that’s unheard of.”

we live on farm land. suburbia clashing with farmland, actually. white-picket fences. cookie-cutter houses. common to find goats and pigs passing behind it. horses are expected in our town.

“you’re right,” i told her. yelled out, actually, because the music was loud and it wasnt very good and hurt my ears. artistic flair while singing stand by me isn’t the absolute best idea. my parents are starting to get deaf in their 60s, and though i tease them a lot for it, there’s always a ping of fear.

my parents are aging.

i’m an only child.

i’ve lost my friends, and the few that were solely mine are on the computer and not tangible. i’ve lost the man that i thought i was going to be with forever— he has six little brothers and one little sister, with one tired father trying to keep it all together, did you know that? he’ll never be alone. he’s got family.

my family is sick. i’m worried about them. dad coughs a lot, mom went to the hospital for heart problems, and i was told that the man that i loved would rather be with someone else than with me. the lines under his eyes are deep. the tone of finality is painful. i wonder every day if i should’ve been better. well, i should’ve been. that’s not much of a question.

it’s a lot easier to be with her than it is to be with you, izy.

i started counting up to ten in my head. i don’t know where this habit started, but it’s helped. beat out the thoughts by yelling out numbers. over and over and over. if i stop myself from thinking, i won’t cry.

“i want to go back upstairs,” i tried, after my seventh or eighth count. taking in my dad’s hesitation to swallow around his juice. “uhm. i don’t feel so good.”

“are you sure?”

i know my parents. i know that they asked my therapist to make sure i wasn’t… critical. what a bad way to talk about it. i’ve never been suicidal— ironically, i’ve always been the type of person to think it’s rather useless. i want to live. i like living. dying always sounds so painful. i like listening to music. and drawing. and writing. even if it’s hard and difficult when i’m like this.

i know that my therapist asking me if i’m safe meant that my parents asked her to make sure. and what i told her was true: i’ve never been suicidal. it’s the only thing “left” to truly say i have depression. it’s the only box left unchecked.

just because you’ve never had it doesn’t mean you won’t. and i want to check, because i obviously don’t want you to die. i look forward to talking to you all the time. you’re one of the funniest clients i’ve ever met, and so interesting.

probably not a good idea to be called interesting by a psychologist.

the hotel room we have is twenty floors up. nineteen, actually, because this hotel skips level 13. superstition? it’s so fun. my dad and i snickered about it the first time we spotted it. twenty floors up. the window opens. it’s too cold to do that, but it does.

i made eye contact with my dad across the table in the lounge. i know my dad. i know how he thinks. he’s always telling me to pay rent if i’m gonna read all of his thoughts so clearly.

my dad is aging right in front of me.

and he is absolutely terrified of letting me go upstairs alone.

“i’m sure,” i told them.

my dad swallowed slowly. he struggled to pull out his key card from his wallet, taking his time. i’m not sure if he was taking his time because his fingers don’t move as quickly anymore. i’m not sure if he was taking his time because our fingers were red from the cold that we’re not accostumed to. i’m not sure if i was reading too much into it.

i took the keycard. i went to the elevator. i pressed the button.

the live music really sucked.

and i thought about my parents. sitting there. wondering.

before the doors of the elevator opened, i went back to the lounge. i sat through the aggravating music, and played with the bottle cap of my mom’s barely-touched diet pepsi bottle. we’re a coke zero family.

when an ambulance stopped in front of our hotel, glittering red and blue lights into the lobby, my parents said nothing.

and it said everything.

[arathergrimreaper]

J*hnny D*pp is untouchable garbage, ik, but there's one older movie of his I think about a lot called Benny & Joon, where he does this Buster Keaton sort of routine and after Joon sees it, she asks, 'Did you go to school for that?' and his character responds, 'No. I was kicked out of school for that.'

This scene and the underlying, probably unintentional, meaning of it sticks with me. For context, I'm not that talented at anything no matter how many hours I dedicate to it, but I've received compliments and more than a couple wistful 'I wish I could find time to do that's from people who've seen me crochet or draw or pole dance or what-have-you. There seems to be this misunderstanding that these things are doable for me because I have a plethora of time and resources or energy others just...don't.

This could not be further from the truth.

I make time to do these things. How? By sacrificing quality and time dedicated to the things society tells me should be the ultimate priority. Example? My crochet work drastically improved after years of false starts and finally finding the right teacher (Youtube) by...taking it to certain lectures with me in college. I would sit there and work on it even if it was large and took up my whole lap rather than taking notes. I still participated in class discussion. I still took my tests and did my essays (when ADHD and perfectionism didn't prevent me from turning in boring crap nobody gave a damn about). Classmates would look at me like I was insane, but not a single professor bothered me about it because my grades and class participation were solid.

Same thing with work. My current job is...well, I need money like many of you and 'beggars can't be choosers' yadda yadda. The point is, I have a lot of downtime in between duties and assignments, most of which only have to be done on a monthly basis. So I write. Fuck, I've written nearly three books worth of words since starting here nearly two years ago. One of which I did in a month (i was going for sterilization surgery consultation and wrote up 100 reasons and elaborations why i needed this surgery, just in case). And I draw. If anyone sees me at it (my back faces the door and there's high foot traffic by our office -_-), they don't say boo to me because I get my work done (and some of theirs too, lbr) and growing up with strict parents made swapping tabs and hiding chat rooms child's play. Thank Hephaestus for Firefox and adblockers.

I'm also not close with the majority of my blood family in the emotional or geographical sense. No real obligations there. Friends? The majority of them are...well, here. I regularly talk to and interact with 2 whole people in 2 different states. Even the effort of trying to meet more isn't a priority to me even though I make shallow attempts a couple of times a year. I'm not close to any coworkers either because I never feel I can trust them due to problems with gossipy coworkers in the past and, ofc, the current climate of people playing shoot-em-up when work pushes them past their breaking point.

Make no mistake, I am taking a risk doing these things. I risk write-ups and firing and dying alone and all kinds of shit...because I'd rather be doing art. Something I am never going to be able to live off of so I have to steal time from other things to be able to do it. When I go home, I barely have the energy to cook, clean, run errands, and do some meatsuit maintenance before I have to come back the next day. There have been so many times I've fallen asleep before I could get even partway through what I planned for the night, right at my computer or next to my sketch book.

I have to snatch back the time taken from me, there is no other recourse. Lunch breaks are not enough when we even get them (in OH, employers are not legally obligated to provide those. found that shit out at a factory i used to work at where i also wrote fanfic in a notebook between machine unloading). There are zero guarantees of a better afterlife or reward for continued suffering in this life and maybe it's the neurodivergency talking, but I refuse to waste more of it than I already have pretending the things I am forced to do are inherently better or more fulfilling than the shit I want to do.

TL;DR All this is really just to say: get sneakier. STEAL time back where you can. Else you're just going to keep wishing for more time you're never going to get.

[everythingismadeofchaos]

Look I hate Al art and the idea of AI art taking over art from human beings, but I am scared

Sometime in the late '90s I had a conversation with a professional engineer at the company I was working for. She was pretty old so I don't think she really understood where computers were going. But I told her eventually ebooks are going to be a big thing.

She didn't believe me. You know why? Because who would want to sit at a desk with a giant keyboard and a giant CRT monitor and read words on a screen? That's just not how people enjoy reading books. A paper book will always be better than that.

But it seemed trivial to understand that the technology was going to get better. People were working on this problem. I couldn't convince her.

Sometimes these days I wonder if she owns a Kindle. I do.

I know it's not a real parallel because the author still wrote the book, but that's not what I'm getting at; I'm talking about the people that make books for a living. I'm talking about the booksellers and the printers and the typesetters and all of those people. Those are the people that ebooks really hurt. That's the parallel I'm drawing. I'm sorry if this isn't a very good analogy but I'm really high right now and I'm doing the best I can, sorry

My point is that you can't count on AI art staying stupid. We make fun of it. We make fun of the extra fingers. It is really dumb. Meanwhile there are other tools that don't just generate images, but help real artists generate images, and these are AI based as well, not large language models or video generator AIS, whatever they call those, but fill tools and stuff like that.

My point is this shit is going to get better and it's going to start getting better really fast really soon. And if they can apply it to coding, coding by AI is going to get way better really fast really soon. Recently I was trying to learn some coding and I decided to try using an AI to generate some code that did what I wanted and then learn from that what I was trying to learn about coding and not only did it not work but I couldn't figure out what the hell it was doing wrong, but that's probably temporary.

I'm not saying we're doomed, but I've managed to stay optimistic about a lot of things in the face of a lot of what appear to be bad signs, but I'm failing with AI art. I really wish somebody would give me a reason not to be pessimistic here, if anybody's reading this

Can't afford art school?

After seeing post like this 👇

And this gem 👇

As well as countless of others from the AI generator community. Just talking about how "inaccessible art" is, I decided why not show how wrong these guys are while also helping anyone who actually wants to learn.

Here is the first one ART TEACHERS! There are plenty online and in places like youtube.

📺Here is my list:

Proko (Free)

Marc Brunet (Free but he does have other classes for a cheap price. Use to work for Blizzard)

Aaron Rutten (free)

BoroCG (free)

Jesse J. Jones (free, talks about animating)

Jesus Conde (free)

Mohammed Agbadi (free, he gives some advice in some videos and talks about art)

Ross Draws (free, he does have other classes for a good price)

SamDoesArts (free, gives good advice and critiques)

Drawfee Show (free, they do give some good advice and great inspiration)

The Art of Aaron Blaise ( useful tips for digital art and animation. Was an animator for Disney)

Bobby Chiu ( useful tips and interviews with artist who are in the industry or making a living as artist)

Second part BOOKS, I have collected some books that have helped me and might help others.

📚Here is my list:

The "how to draw manga" series produced by Graphic-sha. These are for manga artist but they give great advice and information.

"Creating characters with personality" by Tom Bancroft. A great book that can help not just people who draw cartoons but also realistic ones. As it helps you with facial ques and how to make a character interesting.

"Albinus on anatomy" by Robert Beverly Hale and Terence Coyle. Great book to help someone learn basic anatomy.

"Artistic Anatomy" by Dr. Paul Richer and Robert Beverly Hale. A good book if you want to go further in-depth with anatomy.

"Directing the story" by Francis Glebas. A good book if you want to Story board or make comics.

"Animal Anatomy for Artists" by Eliot Goldfinger. A good book for if you want to draw animals or creatures.

"Constructive Anatomy: with almost 500 illustrations" by George B. Bridgman. A great book to help you block out shadows in your figures and see them in a more 3 diamantine way.

"Dynamic Anatomy: Revised and expand" by Burne Hogarth. A book that shows how to block out shapes and easily understand what you are looking out. When it comes to human subjects.

"An Atlas of animal anatomy for artist" by W. Ellenberger and H. Dittrich and H. Baum. This is another good one for people who want to draw animals or creatures.

Etherington Brothers, they make books and have a free blog with art tips.

As for Supplies, I recommend starting out cheap, buying Pencils and art paper at dollar tree or 5 below. For digital art, I recommend not starting with a screen art drawing tablet as they are more expensive.

For the Best art Tablet I recommend either Xp-pen, Bamboo or Huion. Some can range from about 40$ to the thousands.

💻As for art programs here is a list of Free to pay.

Clip Studio paint ( you can choose to pay once or sub and get updates)

Procreate ( pay once for $9.99)

Blender (for 3D modules/sculpting, ect Free)

PaintTool SAI (pay but has a 31 day free trail)

Krita (Free)

mypaint (free)

FireAlpaca (free)

Libresprite (free, for pixel art)

Those are the ones I can recall.

So do with this information as you will but as you can tell there are ways to learn how to become an artist, without breaking the bank. The only thing that might be stopping YOU from using any of these things, is YOU.

I have made time to learn to draw and many artist have too. Either in-between working two jobs or taking care of your family and a job or regular school and chores. YOU just have to take the time or use some time management, it really doesn't take long to practice for like an hour or less. YOU also don't have to do it every day, just once or three times a week is fine.

Hope this was helpful and have a great day.

[wheresunandseameet]

2, 3, and 6 for your Blue Beetle S/I mayhaps?

Of course! I will see about sending you at least 2 more numbers to make it even haha 😄.

2. What is your backstory? What was your home life like?

My back story is very much same as real life so i shall be slightly vague 😅 and under the cut cause it still feels very not vague enough 😬.

Also i got rambly and used a lot of like verbal visuals (metaphors? Similies? Its been a while since i was in English class, i need to get a refresher ngl). I didn't add pictures sorry.

Second child of divorced parents. Middle child if including half siblings and step sibling. Was very smily yet shy as a kid but, because of bullying, became quieter and easier to forget/overlook. Raised evangelical Christian and often involved in church things like retreats and summer camps before becoming Agnostic and moving to kinda polytheistic.

Home life was slightly better than school as there wasn't any bullying but things definitely weren't perfect since i didn't get along great with my step father. a lot of larping with the two younger neighbor kids, a lot of computer games, writing and drawing to pass the time. A lot of jumping the elementary school fence with my siblings to play when there was no school. Not much friends outside of church until about middle or high school. A lot of expectations to be like my sister but i never could meet them.

3. What is your sense of style? Do you have any specific aesthetics when it comes to your wardrobe?

I split my sense of style into "wish" and 'capable of'.

My wish style is kinda a mix of 90s/2000s Emo and Skater (a mix of like Avril Lavigne, Hayley Williams, and Edward Elric) with a side of like nerdy/weeb. Some more larpy clothes as well which would include like period specific clothes (like pride and prejudice/bridgerton like dresses or merlin like dresses or clothes both of merlin and ya know all the knights with their armor and weapons).

My 'capable of' style is more about comfort and is somewhat nerdy. It is only like 40% about insecurities. Most of it is just lack of access to funds or actually well made clothes (as the fabrics of stuff isn't that great these days).

My aesthetic is generally probably comfortable but also definitely more on the side of skater if that makes sense (despite my ankles being a bit too wobbly to actually skate 😅😅)

6. What is your personality like? Are there any personality traits that are more evident than others?

Aside from my resting bitch face, i start of polite (possibly including a fake smile) but reserved with my guarded-ness only showing when provoked even if the provocation was only in my own perspective.

If things stay pleasant, the politeness becomes more genuine and any smiles become much less fake. If someone is able to pick a good topic that cracks my shell, i equate it to me blooming like a flower or the sun/moon (depends on perspective tbh) coming out from behind the clouds. I am a big daydreamer prone to focusing on hurt and on comfort.

I am not great at keeping myself 100% safe from people hurting me, if they know how to get me to open up in the first place, and i am not great at immediately cutting ties with toxic people. I will hold onto any "positive" relationship until a line is crossed which then has me cutting ties like someone being thrown overboard a sailing ship.

As to most evident personality traits, it depends on how closely one watches.

Generally i feel like it is my reserved-ness especially with the whole resting bitch face. I don't feel all that charismatic, Generally i feel like i am very awkward, but friends have made me occasionally second guess if my perspective is right or not. I feel like there is also a bit of go with the flow -ness to me as generally i won't rock the boat unless someone is trying to start something that would affect someone else. Like take shit about me? Sure i might cry later but i wouldn't really respond but if someone goes after my friend or even just someone near me? Oh buddy, you just fucked up.

[finsterhund]

They have me on hydromorphone.

It feels better than when I don't take it.

Other than that, overrated tbh.

I actually took photos of the Sly I made, when I was still in the hospital but it's too much effort to transfer them over onto my computer to upload them so that will have to wait. I also want to take photo comparing my current drains to my sternum scar from my trauma because technology has advanced quite a lot.

The drains are still the fucking worst aspect of it though. awful wretched things.

My sternum also hurts. But we apparently did not go through the sternum so maybe it's phantom pain due to trauma? Who the fuck knows.

Apparently I felt the need to "save" the bandage I came home with from my IV. And I didn't know the fuck why. Well I figured it out just now. I kept every one that Cazza was sent home with. Their little colorful wraps mostly. Not the gauze. I guess I did it on instinct. In spite of how fucked up I am right now I'm still subconsciously thinking of her and missing her. :( she would have taken so much good care of me through this. Still, Scott has been a sweetheart although roommate doesn't walk him as regularly so I have to hear him whining and crying until he gets the hint. But there's no way I could control him out there like this lol. He is quite the puller.

I guess I'll throw out the little IV tape when I'm feeling up to it. For now it's too sentimental. Missing Cazza. Wish she could have been here for this, seen me better than I've been is so so long. Seen what I would be capable of when I recovered. You know? We only really knew each other sick.

Did you know leaving anesthesia can trigger depression? I sure fucking do. Wow.

Honestly anyone looking for the best way to support me can draw Andy as a rough skin newt, send me money (lmfao yeah I know) and send me messages. I'm definitely not up to really replying to anything in a timely matter, but I like being known and wanted and thought about.

[cherokeegal1975]

I have always dreamed of my own personal space.

For almost as long as I can remember, I have always wanted to have a private space to be myself, to play and create. This drawing is a manifestation of that deep desire.

I did this one originally in the 1980s I think...but I'm not completely certain of that. I didn't start dating my artwork until the very early 2000s to help me keep track of my progress as an artist.

I haven't been able to finish this one due to certain circumstances not under my control. The point of doing this one over again even though it's basically crap is because it's fading out with age and it's worth preserving in some form because this was a step in my learning process. I've actually gotten a lot better, though I'll always think there can be room for more improvement. Part of the challenge of drawing, never gets dull.

These days, I still need to have my private space, but I also need to live in it. I've recently discovered that I don't know what to do with myself when no one is ordering me about. Even though I absolutely hate it. I can be independent and figure out what I want to do if no one pesters me but being still for hours at a time when I'm not sleeping or watching a video, it makes me feel lost and out of sorts. Drove me back home even though I could've escaped.

I am in a housing program, but the wait list is very long and I'm not really counting on it to work for me. I just signed up for it for the sake of having an option to use it while I continue to do and act as if I have never signed the papers in the first place.

Am I abused? Well, yes. But by people who don't realize what they are doing is abuse and refuse to see it. It's not the worst I've heard of, there is definitely worse. Perhaps I'm just insane. I can't stand the sound of my mother calling my name anymore. Always making demands of me when it's her husband that should be helping out instead of sitting in front of his computer all day when he's at home.

I also noticed that nothing much gets done around here unless I do it. And that's really not fair when there's at least one other person that can take out the trash, clean the bathrooms and help with the vacuuming. Nothing too strenuous...so why does he sit on his butt all day?! And my mom is a little sick and crippled so I don't expect her to do more than she does. Sometimes I really wish she would give herself a break, but the woman doesn't know when to quit, even when it's good for her.

A good person is my mom, even if she is a relentless bitch that I can't stand sharing a space with. I still love her very much. Can't hate her at all, even when she really drives me over the edge and can't understand why I'm so upset...even as I foolishly try to explain to her very plainly why she made me so mad. Apparently I can't talk about my feelings to her. It just gets me yelled at and told to shut up.

I miss drawing. The way things are going, I might have to wait until I move out...if I can move out, before I can start drawing again. The awful thing is its my mother's fault and she's not even doing it on purpose...nor does she care.

[agumonger]

A mystery. I think I like it but literally every person I know who has taken that path goes into a PTSD rant about how it's not worth it while I go into a PTSD rant about how astronomically burnt out I feel after 13 years of studying computer science and feeling like an utter failure despite having a bunch of other things I am much more talented at, all of them art-related except for maybe English. But guess what we have a lot of: English teachers.

Every few months I'm at my fucking limit, wondering why I'm still going down a career path that I absolutely loathe, wondering whether I'm going crazy, whether I'm just broken, whether I have ADHD, whether it IS true that I'd be happier and more motivated studying something creative, or whether it's just wishful thinking and not my true calling.

Is there even such a thing as a true calling? Am I just lazy? Am I broken? Am I selfish? Am I capable of finish anything barely worth it? Can I have a job that doesn't gnaw at my sanity? Is stable income for me? Do I deserve it? Are graphic designers even real? Does anyone need them? Does anyone even hire graphic designers? Is it just a psyop to get people to waste their time studying a career without any professional success and just resign themselves to work at McDonald's for a miserable wage?

Is it even possible for me to pursue any career path at all? Am I really Just Fucking Bad at coding, or is it just a narrative to tell myself to justify giving up every time? Are poor people even allowed to succeed at anything creative, or are all economically successful artists just hooked in by an already established person? Is there any future in pursuing art as a career or will AIs replace us all?

Am I broken? Am I broken? Am I broken?

Graphic design is a mystery to me. That one option I'm always too scared to take. That one option everyone keeps asking me about. "Why don't you study something like that?" Why don't I indeed. I ask myself that question every December, every February, every June. Why am I 30 and still unemployed studying something I fucking hate and I'm clearly terrible at? Why is the most demanded job the most deranged for people with horribly short attention spans, social media addiction, and only motivated by creation?

I could teach English. I could work at a hotel, as a postman, I could gather data all fucking day, attend calls, I could design, I could animate, I could write for a living (and I am fucking serious). I could do all these things with a million more passion, motivation and quality than I do devving, coding, anything computer science really. But here I am, studying this stinking fucking excruciating frustrating ass piece of shit hellworld dystopian mess of a career.

I wonder how many people get disillusioned with graphic design because the outlook is just bad and there's no future in it for real. I wonder, too, how many people get disillusioned because they thought it would be "oh just create and be free ! :)" like how I thought computer science was a good path to make videogames. When my favorite part about them has ALWAYS BEEN designing levels, characters, items, ANYTHING CREATIVE.

I write I design I illustrate I make music I animate I model I rig I draw I CAN SPEAK ENGLISH BETTER THAN 99,9% OF PEOPLE IN MY TOWN. BUT I DON'T WORK IN ANY OF THOSE FIELDS.

WHY.

Why indeed.

I'll keep suffering some more, in the meantime.

Graphic design is a mystery.

[live-love-laugh-lesbian]

OMG hiiii dw abt it at all! your answer is long enough and im so sorry :( i hope you feel better now/soon!!

thank youu omg well im in my first year so we do a bit of everything! some coding like coding websites and stuff and some written computer problems as well! (i would explain but it's kinda hard to and i suck at explaining so asdhkjasdhjh) its a bit of everything! programming (practical) and theory!

ahsdjkahsdkj owning two trousers is so real lmao i think i only own one pair ajskldsjad and they are flared so not fit for all weathers ajksdhkjsah they sound sooo cute! if you wouldnt mind sharing them, i'd love to see them! but thats totally up to you! i dont want to make you uncomfortable at all so the choice is yours! im just a lil nosy hehe

omg same when i was a kid i once ate like an entire chocolate egg in a day! the time after that was hell i was sooo sick but its worthh itttttt and yes exactly!! like whenever i was young i had school assemblies and they were all like 'i dont play to draw i play to win' and like yeah so real! as long as no ones too mean and harsh while being competitive then go nuts! i love a little competition!! stardew valley is more of like a relaxing game for me! also animal crossing but like i get so frustrated when i cant catch a fish asjkdhaskj fishing is HELLLLLL in animal crossing alksdjlksj

awww thank youu! your hair sounds beautiful the compliments are most definitely soo valid! my hair never reached that point when i was young tho bc its like SOOOO frizzy and fluffy it almost grows outwards rather than down askjdhkasjh so it was always kinda short and super fluffy ajsdskjh

i think stuff abt the modern day world i really hate is that almost everyones so pretentious nowadays like you see someone and youre like oh theyre nice speaking out abt this and turns out that its all hypocritical and shit but also that feels like its not exactly modern? so ill give another answer and that is INFLATION! everything nowadays is soooo expensive oh my god! and yes governments is so reall

hmm, smth in the next five years... this is sooo not related at all and im totally twisting the meaning of your question but my online friends ajsdhkajsdh okay but serious answer? i wish to see less labour! like yk sites that use fast fashion and stuff that force labour onto people and children and i want that to be addressed and reduced bc like. no. labour is bad how is it acceptable for people to pay such horrible wages to their workers who make them so much money!! that feels so cruel! what about you?

and my question for you: what is something in/from a person that makes them absolutely unacceptable in your eyes? (i dont think that makes sense lmao) basically if you were friends w someone, whats one thing they could do to make you immediately see them as a red flag or like not like them/block them immediately (apart from them saying the r word!)

byee have an awesome day!

-swiftie spring exchange anon!

Hello again! I am doing better atm - I've basically had like, one long bug for three weeks, and like...I'd start feeling better. Go to work. Get worse from the exertion. Have to miss work. Get better slightly, so go to work...yeah XD I do seem to be on the mend now, I've just got a bit of residual pain and cough, and some of my underlying issues are being a bit unpleasant. But I'm taking it XD I had to take almost a week off work last week but I think the prolonged rest helped.

And hey that sounds really cool though!! So guessing you're in uni then? How's that going? Where I am it's starting to come up to exam season, so the people that I know are in uni at the moment are all quite stressed, bless them.

I don't mind showing you them like, privately, but due to my style being quite...unique (by courtsey of making a lot of it) I try to keep it off public tumblr to some extent, just because anyone who knows me would know immediately this was me. Tbh it's not a big deal if they did, but since I work with kids I feel the need to be more careful with social media these days.

And ok but see, I have very straight hair, and I've always wanted frizzy/fluffy hair!! Sometimes I fear we just want what we don't have XD

I think the hypocrisy is related to the modern world however! Social media kinda encourages a very black and white thinking of things, and most things are not so black and white (I mean like, obviously if someone's like. "Haha, I want to murder babies"...that's not a black and white issue. But you get me XD) So you end up with people being like "x is always bad". Then they'll later be like..."this thing that's basically x is fine"?

Inflation is SHIT. Look when I moved into my current place my phone bill was exactly 10 quid a month. It's not like 13 something!! It's not the biggest hike, my energy bill has freaking doubled, but by nature of it starting at a solid 10 I can see the inflation so much easier. It's a 30% increase!!

And see I am very lucky, I have seen a few online friends! My gf and I met through tumblr, and I've got two close friends that by thankful virtue of being in the same country I've been able to meet quite a few times...I met one who I've since lost contact with sadly, but I'm hoping to meet a couple more! OH and one is in a ldr with one of my close friends so I'll see her when she comes here (well I should do) but idk when that would be yet.

And look I have SO many fast fashion complaints. A big reason why I do so much thrifting and sewing is because I just hate fast fashion. I know it's sorta popular in some circles to talk about the shit quality, but it's shit because companies are paying people like a penny a piece for it -.- I refuse to use places like shein and temu...

I think in the next five years...generally I'm wanting to see a shift in climate change. I have a lot of climate anxiety, and I'm hoping that we start getting actual change in how politicians and companies approach the issues?? I want more eco changes. More bikes, cheaper plant based food, less fossil fuels, etc...I also want my government to stop making life harder for no reason. They recently decided people who have visas to work in the care industry over here can't have their kids come from overseas too?? Like there are people who now have their kids in other countries cause of this shit??? If they're working here, they deserve their kids to be here. How is that not the default idea!!

Less generally, I'm hoping to see improvements in my personal life XD I want to see a couple doctors to get some shit sorted out, and I want to improve my art further, and sort out where exactly I'm going with my career.

And nah that makes perfect sense! Honestly I'm a bit of a pushover, I'll take a lot from people. I think mainly the things that will really make me go. Hm. I mean, if you're outright a really terrible person (like if you told me you murder babies for fun, to use my "terrible person" example from above XD) I'm not gonna be interested in talking to you, but that's kinda obvious. But I think the things that make me go "red flag" are usually more personal things based on past experience. For example, I knew someone once who would move my mobility aids away from me, and I'd be like...right well I can't. Move now. Please give them back. And they're one of the few people I've cut contact with. But tbh I feel like I probably need more boundaries, I just get like...what if I'm being too harsh on this person XD

What about you tho??

See you again soon, hope your day has been well when you see this!!

EDIT: I forgot to ask a question back!! D: If you could make one trivial change to the world what would it be? Has to be something small, like...renaming strawberries to be fluffleberries, or making bananas rainbow XD